Boonta Vista - EPISODE 344: Bottom Of The Ninth Crab Bake For Everyone

Episode Date: April 28, 2024

Get your tickets to the live show right here at boontavista.com/live! *** Lucy, Andrew, and Ben bring you: Equal pay for equal heads, new Dutch mirror technology, no dogs harmed in Kansas, and using the proceeds of crime to thrill the people on your street. *** Support our show and get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at [e-mail]! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Merchandise: shop.boontavista.com/ Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

Hello, it's me, Ben from the podcast, Buntavista. This is just a little message to say that we have a live show coming up. Our second, second ever live show, we have been doing this now for seven years. We are soon coming up on 700 episodes. So far, the only live show that we have done in person was to about 30 to 40 people in the regional hub of Gimpy Queensland. That was a lot of fun. We have decided we should probably do a larger, more accessible version of that, by which I mean putting it in the city that everyone lives, Brisbane. We're going to be doing that on June 15th at Newstead

Brewing Co. We have a very large room upstairs from the venue where we will have a bar set up. We got the space for like the whole night and I think it's gonna be a really good time. You can get tickets for that at Puerto Vista.com slash live. We'd very much love to see there. I think it's gonna be a very lovely time. That's it for me until the nextthe next hour, you're also going to hear from me

because I'm on the episode you're about to hear. I love you. Bye. Hey and welcome back to Buntavista, right? I feel great. Hey and welcome back to Buntavista, right here on Triple J. You just heard the new banger from the Dury smokers. I smoked my last Duhn, thrown. You just heard the new banger from the

Durry Smokers. I smoked my last Dury outside Revs. We've got a massive night coming up here, so grab yourself a Bevington, get some chill vibes happening and stay with us here on Triple J. Got some new tunes coming up for you. It's an artist revolutionizing what it means to take Dexis for self-diagnosed ADHD in NARM. It's Greasy Kevin. But hey, how's your weekend going? What's your vibe? Let us know how your Sunday seche is going. Text us in.

1,800, 317, 515. Let us know and you could win a sign Bong-sucker. Hey Ben what's your sesbbev? I hate you. What's your sesh bev? What's your beb for a sesh? When I'm having a sesh like you know with my boys, with my folks, not my family, I mean just like, I don't really look at the gender of the people around me because with your chosen family. With my chosen family. Yeah. I don't really look at the gender of the people around me because we're just sort of a community. We're your chosen family. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm on those, um, if you guys been getting those, the Instagram ads for the, uh, it's like the hip flasks that look like the paint thinner cans. No. And they're like fancy, like, gentrified hip flasks. What are these? I just try to type in gentrified hip flasks. I don't think that's gonna give anything. Hey, when's the last time you got a yeast infection at the Brunswick Green? Text in and let us know 1,800 3175-15. We've got bops coming up from the Nang huffers, the chicken crimps in the he.top hoods. Hey, when did you last get a pap smear at the doctor?

Text in, let us know, 1,80317-5, giving away two tickets to next weekend's munted fest in Bondi for you and your mates. You're listening to Triple J. And hey, was the last dick you sucked, circumcised or uncut. Text in, 1-8003175155, let's know. You can win a free neurodivergency affirming assessment from Brunswick psychology. Hey Andrew, the text lines popping off. Sage from Castle Main wants to know, where's the craziest place you've logged on to a Zoom therapy session? Oh, crazy story, but I was at the zoo getting on Zoom. It was crazy. It was crazy.

It was crazy. I did get an yeast infection there also. So the venue in Brisbane or the place where the animals are? No, the actual zoo. It was there for my court mandated. Child visitation? Supervised. Yep. Via Zoom, you know? Yeah. That's the irony. The pandemic. Wow. Bloody flashback. Last from the fast. It's really retro. It's kind of vintage at this point, I think, actually.

The Patti D had kind of Y2K vibes. Anyone else notice that? It had Y2K vibes. I want to find what these fucking things are. This is making me crazy. Do you sound crazy? Sorry, what does a tin of paint thinner look like, first of all? You know when you'd get like, um... say. Oh so it's like the little

Keane one. They kind of look, they're like rectangular. They look almost like, you know, when you get a big bottle of olive oil and they're in those like big metal sort of things. Yeah, but imagine one of those. That's what's called a have a sesh babe out of. Yeah, that's, I'm having my sesh beves, that's what I have like like th. Like the th. Like, like th. Like, it's like the th. Like, it's like the th. It's like a the the the the the the the th. It's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's, it's, it's, it's, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, a, a little, a little, the their, the the the the the what's called to have a sesh bebub out of. Yeah, that's, I'm having my seshbebs, that's what I have. Like it's, it's like a small one of those. You'd almost call it like a, like a miniature jerican full of gin. Miniature jerrycan, come on. This is gonna give me something. Nope, this is people that have, fucking. They've retrofitted old jerry cans into portable bars.

Sort of like an Etsy type thing people are doing. Wow. Anyway, that's what's cool. And you know what I'm talking about. See, that's the thing. It's so cool that I can't know about it because I'm 33 years old. God damn. When I'm having a seche, I'm drinking Byron Bay brewing lager. Yeah, that's a seshe beve. If I've ever seen one.

The sesh beve and like the logo it just makes me think of being in Byron, which is the most authentic thing you can do. It's so authentic to be in Byron. It is. It's just so authentic. It's just so authentic. It's just. Oh. I'm being so authentic right now. Oh damn. Hey bro, you look authentic as fuck, I say to the people around me. Those Diablo sticks are so fucking authentic, bro. People still doing those? Yeah, probably.

I hope so. Yeah, in Bond Somebody out there's doing them? I hope so. Yeah, in Bondi, maybe. This is a podcast where we cover the important stuff. Sort of fashionable, small tins of alcohol that I can't find the name of, what it means to be in- barren. Who's still doing Diablo sticks? Yeah, that's the sort of thing that we should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should should the that that the about about about And the stuff we should chat about is a thing that we cover in a segment called Stuff We Should Chat About.

It's time for stuff we should chat about. Ben, I really appreciate this as a segment that you have invented solely for stuff I can't find any other reasonable way to talk about amongst the like 20 to 30 thirty. share this is a segment that you have invented solely for stuff I can't find any other reasonable way to talk about amongst the like 20 to 30 segments that we do on the show. In the 500 segments nothing is covered by what I'm about to bring up. So I've done something here that I would normally never do in that I have taken something for the show from a conversation that was happening in discord literally this morning because I saw taken something for the show from a conversation that was happening in discord.

Literally this morning because I saw this and it is making me absolutely crazy. Someone posted a sort of a meme image that referenced something in real life and I went to check if it was real, if it was a real thing and then I found an article from the BBC from 2013. I'm just going to read you a couple of paragraphs from this. Let me know what you think. Abby and Brittany Hensel are conjoined twins determined to live the normal active life of outgoing 20-somethings anywhere. They've been a university, they travel, they have jobs.

But how easy is it for two people to inhabit one body? Is it one body? So, they- The two bodies that are like a, like someone's put a lighter up to the edge of a, of a GI Joe and then... That's a brutal way to describe that, but they are conjoined twins to the extent that they share one torso, two legs, two arms, but they have two necks, two heads. That's the worst kind, right? They share... I don't know.

Like, for them. What kind of got for you to see? Would you prefer to be? I'd prefer to have a separate... Separate torso, maybe. You want your own. I think, look, my personal opinion about the worst type to be... Is the worst type to be. It's the person reading this.

No, it's the, I remember seeing years ago some kids and they would like trying to operate on them and split them up and they were top of the head to top of the head. Oh, that is a tough one. Yeah, that's like, are you getting around on a unicycle? What are you doing? There's, that's like, that's logistic nightmares way beyond. What do you cycle help? Well, as that can stand specifically? So what are the walking on long side? Yeah, maybe, well, we've got e-scooters now. Yeah.

The text is got a really long way. Like, I can't believe can't join twins exist. It's like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi. to. thi. thi. thi. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. the, they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. th. th. th. th. th. that's, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's exist. It's crazy, right? It's crazy. It's very uncommon and people mostly don't survive. But these guys are, well at least in 2013, how positive they're thriving. Well, they're sort of thriving. Just clarify, so they do share a torso, but in that toso is two sets of lungs, two hearts, two stomachs, two tha, tomts, tops, ths, ths, tha, thops, thops, thops, thops, thops, thops, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, and tho, and thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, and large intestine, and one reproductive system. So some stuff shared, some stuff, individual. Doubles is better. Doubles is better. Triples is better.

Triples would be best, but you don't want to be greedy, you know? Like most 23 year olds, Abby and Brittany Hensel love to their friends, going on holiday, driving and playing sport such as volleyball and living life to the full. These guys are my age. That's crazy. And Lucy's actually. 23. Yeah. They were 23 and 2013. Oh. I was going to say, was this a new bit we're doing? We're in our early 20s. And we're all single. The identical conjoined twins from Minnesota in the United States have graduated from Bethel University and is setting out on their career as primary school teachers with an emphasis

on maths. Although they have two teaching licenses, there is one practical difference when it comes to the finances. So these guys, they each have a degree, they each paid for their degree individually, right? That's fucked. Quote, obviously right away, we understand that we are going to get one salary because we're doing the job of one person, says Abby. Disagree. They get paid as one person.

I get, I guess you'd have to. But you shouldn't have to pay for two degrees. That should be illegal. I think the deal should be that it's just won everything. You only got to pay for one ticket to something, pay for one degree. One seat on the plane. Yeah. I mean you get two seats obviously, but you should only have to pay for one of them.

I think they would need two seats because they are two heads! What, this just seems, I don't think that you, there should be some sort of labor law that is just like, oh we absolutely cannot give one salary to what is functionally two people. It seems like a weird, a weird kind of like, uh, spin on like the reproductive rights kind of argument where it's like, do you recognize this legally as two people? And if you do, surely you must, the two people. Yeah, like you call them by different names because they're individuals. But yeah, it's like two people who have to show up and you're getting like 16 hours on a eight-hour shift, you know, they both have to be there. New management hack to get double the hours.

Get double the hours. I just want to say to anybody listening, if you are a conjoined twin, your kind is the best kind. Okay? You do have to pay for two patrons, subscriptions though. Yeah, you've actually been stealing from the podcast. Yeah, one of you they the they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they He found the paying for one. Yeah, unless you're using... One of you hates the podcast, the other one loves the podcast. Yeah. Maybe they're using one really big set of over-ear headphones, you know?

I'd get a headphones splitter in two sets of headphones, personally. Oh, money bags over here. I just, I can't... I read that this morning and I've been completely unable to stop thinking about it. That's just, there's no way that can be right. Taking home your one paycheck. Like, whose name do they put it? Like, who's name the ta?

Like, who's, who's the name? Who's, who's the job? Yeah. Yeah, because, the name my phone the whole fucking time. Yes. You're getting one of us. You're getting an Abbey. Like you are not getting Brittany. You cannot have Brittany. As some of us with small children understand, they don't shut up. They will not stop asking you things. They're desperate to learn stuff or to complain

about someone else. Yeah, it's not a good look. It's so desperate. So I think, I think that like, like, like, like, like, th that, like, th th th th th th th th th that like, like, that, th th th th that, th thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi you are thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi, thi, thi, thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to the the the the the tooi the the tooi tooi tooi to to to to to to thi thi thi thi to complain about someone else. Yeah, it's not a good look. It's so desperate. So I think, I think that like in this case, you've got twice as many teachers to say, uh-huh, he did what? No, I don't care. That's like... Go sit down. They say basically exactly this. There's a quote here where Brittany says, one can be teaching and one to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, the, to be, the, the, thi, the, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thii, thiii, thi, thii, thi, thi, thi, thi, answering questions. So in that sense we can do more than one person. Yeah, because you are more than one person.

Yeah, in the sense that you are two people. You are two people. Fuck you pay Brittany. Or fuck you pay Abbey. Like whichever one is not the one that's on the paychecks. This information is 10 years old, so maybe they're in a position now where that's different. Can't rush these things though. Yeah, well, I do nice. But also, I don't want to get into like towardry speculation here as well, but one of them is married. I was going to say, is this the same ones that were in the news recently? Because one of the news, their thinks. Oh, maybe. That might be. That might that. That might their. their. that. that. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. tho. tho. tho. thoan. thin. tho. tho. tho. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. to to to thi. to to to thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. th. the. the. toda. toda. toda. toda. today. today. today. today. today. today. today. to. today. to. to, there was from the husband saying, like, oh no, I'm only married to one of them. He's obviously, that was the first thing everybody asked.

Oh no, I barely know her sister. Yeah, we don't really speak. I hate her. It's like, they are, they're individuals, they're people. Like, of course, this isn't going to complex like philosophical and relationship problems you guys going to have. You should be getting paid as individuals. Yeah. That's fucked up.

Yeah, it's fucked up. Maybe, I don't know, chai-like. Sorry, I'm completely agreeing with you, Ben, obviously. I'm just thinking if that was the case, would I rather have a different kind of job? You know, like, um, jobs for conjoined twins, list them. Yeah. I'm just, I'm just saying if we're only getting paid for one person, I would rather like work behind the counter at a 7-Eleven on the night shift where I don't have to talk to anyone or do anything. If I'm only getting half the money, yeah. I'd rather something where I'm not being charged with like helping people's children learn and develop, you know, like teachers already don't get paid enough.

Yeah, now you're getting half of a teacher's salary. You couldn't feasibly tap out, like as one of the twins. You can't like, yeah, if a kid like walked up and was like, oh, cut my finger, I need a bandaid. I'm not working. Jeremy. Get fucked Jeremy. Get fuck. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. t. tod. today. today. today. te. te. te. te. te. te. te working. Jeremy. Get fucked, Jeremy. You want Abby. I'm not in today, okay? It's kind of mandatory for you to be like, to put on a pleasant face, to do the emotional labor of being a school teacher. Jeremy, when you see me wearing my Philadelphia Flyer's hat, I am not working. I am watching the game. We've discussed the hat system.

Why do you think I have an iPad four inches away from my face, blocking out the children? Brittany's on her iPad all day. Would you like to wear a shroud all day? Would you like to put a little blanket over the top of my head like I'm a bird in a cage so we can all pretend I'm asleep to the's not going to happen, Jeremy. Let Brittany use her iPad. Look at the hat. Read my body language. And you know what?

Let's get rid of Jeremy. I'm sick of that kid. These attitudes. Jeremy, you're out of here. You're out of here. Apparently, there's only I just felt that we needed to discuss. It felt more that you were captured by it. I definitely, I wanna say tickled, outraged.

I'm gonna get a shirt, fuck you, pay them both. Get them money, money for conjoined twins. Double money for double person. Yeah. That's just the regular amount of money. One brain, one salary. Yeah. Is that fair?

That's fair. I don't think we should be doing it based on how many feet they have. We don't have conjoined twins where there's like one brain, right? No, I don't think so. That's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's just the thoing thoing that's just thoing thoing their their their thoomoing. thoomoomoomoing. their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their their their. their. their their their their. their. their their. their. their their their their their thiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thoomoomoomoomorrow. thooooooomooomorrow. that's thoooooooooomoomoomorrow. that's thoooomoomo No. No, I don't think so. That's just one person with too many body parts. Yeah, that's one person with two bodies. That's obvious. That's obvious. That's one salary.

They got one salary. I don't care how many feet you have. You get one salary. We actually pay you more because you've got extra hands for dusting, like the black, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, riding stuff at the same time hitting Jeremy. You could be doing it all at once. He's so good at drumming. Get that guy on the skids and tubs. So good at call of duty. That was something we should chat about. Another thing that we should chat about and do chat about pretty often is what the fuck is happening in the Netherlands. It's time for Netherlands corner. Tell me, buddy, I'm from Holland. Isn't that beer?

It's weird as fuck. This comes from the NL Times. Supermarket. Dirk. Yep. Equipping staff with body cams, privacy watchdog, concerned. Grrr. That's the watchdog. Yeah. Supermarket, Dirk. Was he trilling? Do dog trill?

And is supermarket dirk? And is supermarket dirk a man or is the supermarket Dirk? Oh, you've never heard of Supermarket Dirk? I think it's sort of like a local soup here. Dirk is a very large chain, a large-ish chain of Dutch, Dutch supermarkets. That's... Shopping at Dirk. Yeah. Yeah. Going down to Dirk. Yeah.

Remember how like, uh, marketing goes through all those cycles of like, oh, every company or, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, a th.. A th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. thi. th. thi. thi. thi. th marketing goes through all those cycles of like, oh, every, every company or product is going to have like a lowercase eye on the front of it? Or, um, or, um, I don't know, I feel like there was a little while there, where it was like, we're going to call our service, like, Dave. I knew you were thinking about Dave. Yeah, what was that? Dave was like a TV channel, It it, I, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, every, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. were thinking about Dave. Yeah, what was that? Dave was like a TV channel wasn't it? It is currently a TV channel in the UK I believe. Dave. Stan? We got it out. Cut it out. They got Craig? They got Craig? Oh, Craig just plays nothing but golden all this. Oh, the 24 hour. Happy days. Listening to Craig. Flipping over to Craig? Oh, it's Happy Days again.

I only watch Craig. Yeah. We're a Craig household. We actually switched it to Craig and then cut our TV remote in half with a hacksaw. Ah, got Craig on the radio, going down to Dirk, coming home for some stand. Fuck off. Sorry, anyway. I have a real name.

You are on blast on blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast blast real name. You are on blast world. This is really marketing people. You went and you did a degree and he said, what if we called it a name? What if we call the product or service a name? Supermarket, Dirk Van Debrook will equip employees with body cameras. I like that the supermarket has a full-

Full name, like a man's name. Okay, so it's not called that anymore. It's just Dirk now. Yeah, it's just Dirk now. Kind of a Ruth's Chris situation. The Vanderbilt. It's cleaner. We've all known you for long enough now, Mr. Van der Bruck. Talking like, it's a the the name. A, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the thain name. A, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that, thi. thi. thi. than long enough now Mr. Vanderbrook talking like to the supermarket,

like it's a guy. Hey, it could be Dirk. You know, we've known each other long enough now. It's like Dan Murphy's is always trying to brand themselves as Dan's. Yeah. Pop down to Dan's. You're not a man. Yeah. Mr. Murphy I call him because I was right. He's right. Yeah. The small portable cameras can be used in tense or threatening situations and should prevent unsafe incidents in stores. The Dutch Data Protection Authorities, AP, finds the measure, worrying, and has asked the supermarket chain for clarification. According to the supermarket, the body cam on

the shop floor differs from the standard body cams used by police and NS. It's an S. No idea. There the camera records images that can later be used as evidence in court. The body cam Dirk van der Brueck will use is a small camera with a screen on which misbehaving customers will see themselves. Oh, so like the self-checkout where it's like meant to deter you because you can see yourself stealing? It sounds to me. It sounds to me. Is it meant to just make you aware that you're on camera by seeing that there's a camera recording? Like the specifically the self-checkout one. I think I, it's meant to make you go, oh, they have my identity.

They've captured, they've captured part of my soul. Because it's not like I would like to look up and see myself putting it, you know, a nice tomato through as an onion and be like, is this what I've become? Is this who I am there? Is the man? mirror? Will I be able to face my forefathers proudly in Valhalla after seeing myself do this? Yeah. No. I don't care. Nifelheim or whatever. Yeah, like they're also just taking pictures of the shit you're doing, so it's not like they're just relying on the guilt factor. Like there's already CCTV in the supermarket.

Yeah. This one's funny though of just being like someone's been churdy at you. Can you see what you look like right now? This is you? You look like these. It sounds like they could have saved a lot of money on the rollout by giving all their staff just a hand mirror. Yeah like mirrors. Why don't just strap a mirror to every Dirk employee? Little mirror and then somebody starts in you go,

you like how you look right now? Give Dirk employers a gun? Yeah, give them a gun and a mirror. It's a two-step process. Dirk workers. The moment. So you are coating my mirror in spittle, please, please calm down. The mirror is not working, okay. Click, click.

If a difficult customer threatens to create an unsafe situation, doing a little pre-cog stuff here, huh? Yeah. Let's wait till they get to the unsafe situation, you know? The employee can turn on the body cam and confront the customer with the images. Do you she? Do you she?

So it's just a mirror. It's a mirror. They're putting mirrors on them. Oh, it's so funny. It's like the idea of they're like, they're satirizing the customers. They're holding up a fun house mirror to the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer the customer thethey're like, they're satirizing the customers. They're holding up a fun house mirror to their behavior, except it's a normal mirror. It's just... It's like when a baby's having a tantrum and you just start going, eh, it works. It works. What are you doing? That looks so crazy. You look like an idiot. I'm the idiot. Oh, I get it.

I just learned my first thing. Yeah. Storing that one. Storing that one for later. I'm sure a giant woman mocking me. As my first formative experience. That's not going to do anything. Just going through your first installation of your mind palace.

I mean like, do I put this one to come up in 10 years or 20 years? Let's say 20. Let's see. You see how that emerges. You're gonna set this one to come up after I get married. Yeah. Honey? After my first divorce. Oh, do you never thought that be rudder to me? Do, uh, do, now forgive my ignorance.

Do the Dutch people know about mirrors? Do they have mirrors? Have they got those over there? Yeah, are they illegal maybe? Are these people being shown their visage for the first time? Oh! Oh! Are these people being shown their visage for the first time? Oh! Oh!

I'm hideous! They're falling backwards over themselves, knocking stuff off the shelves and they're rushed to escape. Who's that? Ghostly apparition! It's trying to attack the mirror. Get out of here! You have conjured a double ganger. This creature is evil.

Back away, reverse, mad. I do not see the light of a soul in his eyes. Running for the door. Running for the door. And if that's the case, they don't have mirrors. Good innovation here. Yes. Yeah. They went the long way around to mirrors.

They really had to wait for the developer of like microchips, optics, all that stuff. Going to a job interview and you've got to go down the dirk and fuck with a staff member just to kind of see how your hair is. I'm going to create an unsafe environment. Yeah, there we go. Thank you. You're feeling the beach. You look stupid. Thank you very much. According to Dirk, again, not a person. Not a man. Yeah. Talking about Dirk like he's a guy that we're having a conversation with. Yeah. This podcast is between five people. Man, yeah. Talking about Dirk like he's a guy that we're having a conversation with. Yeah.

This podcast is between five people. Us three, the listener and Dirk. The supermarket. The supermarket. The supermarket. I don't like having a conversation with Dirk after I've like gone inside of him. I actually think it's very nice. I feel close to him than I ever have before.

warm in there. What kind of stuff they got to the deli and dirk? According to Dirk, experiences in the industry show that this can have a de-escalating effect. Yeah, people just, they're talking and yelling and then just they start going, oh a minute wait a minute tracking their own hand movement back and forth they do the duck soup thing oh oh oh oh the cameras in the store images and sound are only stored and used when necessary the supermarket said Dirk already tested the body cams last year the company will start using the

cameras in 40 stores quote we have all we have always used camera surveillance in the stores for prevention said director Dirk Vandabrook. Okay way. No no no no no no Dirk is dead. So who's this? Do they mean the director of? I think they'd be the director of whose name is Marcel. Oh. Yeah, they don't mention him by name. But I was like, oh wait, okay, so there is a Dirk Vanderbilt. No, he died pretty recently.

Um, like 2014 or something? Yeah, there is no. And then I was like, oh my god, his son's took over to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their th, th, their like, oh my god, his son took over and his son's name is also Dirk Dirk? It's not. No. Please. His son's name is... I think Marcel, I think Marcel might be his... No. Is he? No. Please. I'm on the Dirk... Dirk Vandenbrook is my father and also my supermarket. What could any of this mean? Dirk, de Gut coups to supermarket Van Niederland? We've got got the the th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. I th. I th. I th, th, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the, the, the, the, the, the, theat, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, thean, the. thland. We've got some menus, Winkles. Ooh. Oh. Can I get a six pack of Winkles?

Boot sharpen. And can scoop jeez. And I think that's normal. And I think that's normal one. It's an OK way to be. That's right, all kinds of people can listen to this show. Conjoin Twins, the Dutch, we love you all. Just to clarify, sorry, Martel Huitsing is not the son of Dirk Vandenbrerk, but he is

the son of a Dirk Vandenbrerk manager. So like a supermarket manager, so he's still grandfathered in but not to that extent. Right. Okay. Yeah. Do you have any idea who my father is? Is the manager of the local Dirk. He manages a Dirk in Osdorp. So, uh, yeah, I don't think I'm going to be paying the speeding ticket officer.

Yeah, I'm kind of a big deal. Maybe you haven't heard about me yet. In Osdorp. I'm mostly a big deal at Osdorp at the moment. Oh, what's that officer? You're insisting that I do have to pay the speeding fine? Well, look at your face right here on my chest. Oh, sorry, I just read the personal info section of his Wikipedia. He's got some thing he's married and has two children. He does cross fit.

Nice. Let me tell you, if you want a fun time, just go on the Dutch supermarket catalog page. Say some of the words to yourself. There's a picture of what seems to be like an apple turnover, and it says apple flap. They are beautiful people. That's just fun. That's fun. Just rocking with it, you know? For us, the body cameras are in addition to the workplace to quickly de-escalate

threatening situations because every incident is one too many for our colleagues and customers. You know what? Yeah, they're not wrong. Why are people doing that? Have you noticed like every supermarket has those posters at the front now that's like, oh, please don't stop yelling? Stop yelling at our staff. Definitely there was a huge uptick in yelling during the pandemic. But it seems to be, people are still yelling. Did we keep yelling?

Because we shouldn't have. I think there is certainly a segment of the populace for whom yelling was unlocked by the pandemic. People who said, I'm mad at hell and I'm not going to take it anymore. Yeah. And that just manifested in like insisting that no one can ever tell you that something should happen. Yeah. Or also to please stop doing something. It's like people still getting mad about people wearing masks. That one's real like getting mad about somebody else wearing a mask.

It's like fucking six people, you know, who are they bothering? Leave them in peace. Sorry, I'm still trying to find the hip flask. The hip flask thing. Jesus Christ. Did it come to me? You have been a great. 33 minutes.

Ah! Do you find it? Maybe? No. Departed spirits. Great radio. This is podcasting. It's J. It's Departed Spirits. Departed Spirits. It's the name of the brand. Departed Spirits. Give me a picture and I will

faithfully describe it for our listeners. It's, I mean it is essentially what I was describing. It just sounds very specific. Yeah. Like this might just be a thing useful. You have to understand I was getting a lot of ads. A lot. All right, I am going to take issue Ben on a really fundamental level with what you've described. Because I don't believe that these these are intended as hip flasks. They seem to just be packaging for alcohol. It's in the shape of a hip plask. Look that, it's definitely in the shape of hip plauce.

I mean, it's just, it's 500 mils of gin. It's just like, I think it's, I think they're selling gin in a thing that is like, you know those, um, have their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their like you know those some you've seen those water bottles that are like to go in your purse the ones that like a three not your purse you have a handbag or whatever yeah yeah like the flat ones all of their ads show people like holding them and drinking from them they're sort of positioning themselves as like a mobile beverage solution yeah for the active person the website open from the brand identity.com. Fucking. All right. So can I describe, can I describe this? Can I just want to quickly, just I'm so validated here.

I have posted a photo of this in our chat. And Theo, who is not on this episode and has not heard any of what we've been saying has just said, sipping on that thinner. It does. It does. Okay, maybe, maybe, and Lucy's about to answer this for us, but maybe can we split the difference and say it is certainly shaped like a, you know, roughly the shape, although you're not getting 500 milliliters in a fucking hip flask. No, it's tiny.

It's not that big. This is muchers in a fucking hip flask. No, it's tiny. Hip flask. This is much bigger than a hip flask. But, so even if it's like in that sort of shape, I do not think they are intended to be refilled and reused. Oh, I'm not reusing it. No. No, no. This will answer the nature of a hip fla. Okay, please. The utilitarian flask with its pocketable design is also a rebellion in its own way.

Oh, I'm going to put a fucking gun in my mouth. Moving away from the out-of-the-box glass forms that dominate the craft spirit market, the smash-proof tin plate flasks underscore the label's anti-craft agenda, while becoming the perfect canvas for the light-handed branding. With the brand name on one end and the details of the variant on the other, the design tax cues from 1950s NASA branding resulting in a unique tension between feeling utilitarian and at the same time futuristic. It's so cool to be like, we're an anti-brand brand. Yeah.

Moving away from the glass forms that dominate the craft spirit market. You mean, are you trying to say a bottle? You're a same bottle. You're a same bottle. Now this might, this is probably the most advertising. The guy's all sitting around and going, I just can't remember the fucking name for it. It's like a glass to cook anybody. It's kind of like it looks like a paint thinner thing.

Fuck! Four guys in a room. Fuck! I shouldn't have done five grams of cocaine last night. Fuck. Don't buy this, all right? Like, we're talked about it so much now. I'm going to bleak out the name the name the name the name the name the name the name the name the name the name the name of the brand. It was. No, you spent so long finding

it. People need to see what you're talking about. I don't think I... I don't want them to get an inch more notoriety. And how much do these cost? Oh, I bet they're spenny. I bet they're spinn-oh. Who the fuck is, who's tooling around? You know what I always... Get fucked. The thing that I always found the fundamental problem with the hip flask model, right? As an economist, as a person who has sometimes carted around a hip flask, so that he may become drunker still, wherever he is, is that if you are actually carrying one on you and you're out for the night, your body heat is bringing that shit up to above tepid.

Like, if it's in a pocket, if it's in contact with your person, and like, like this shit, a thing of like green apple vodka, come the fuck on for a start. But also, nothing like just sneaking a nice sip of my hot green apple vodka. Which is 60, it's sold out, it was $65 for 500 meals. 500 mils. Get fucked off. Hey, this is a tip for a 35% percent. Tip for young players. If you're a 20-year-old and you go to house parties and stuff and you're like,

oh, I don't know what the fridge situation is there. I don't know what the Eski situation is going to be. You get a hip flask, you fill it up with, let's say, southern comfort, Jack Daniels, the tallies, too, the their, their, th, th, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and you, and you, their, their, their, their, their, th, th, th, th, and th, th, th..e, the, the, thr. And, throwne, throwne, throoooooooooooooooooooooooome, the.e.e. And, throooooooooout. The hip flask, that's for later on. But for now, while the tallies of Cooper's Best Extra Stout is still cold, you just carry them and you just smash them real quick. And then the rest of the night, you just hold the flask. You've already got a good buzz going, you don't have to worry about keeping the flask the thi. And also people to to to to to to to to to thin, to thin, to thin, thin, thin, thin, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the their, their, their, their, while thi, while, while, while, while their, while their, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, while, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their, their their their, their their their their their their their their their talluilies, talle, talle, talle, talle, while, talle, tallu, while, this dope dude over there is just sipping out of it. He's like a really cool guy. Wow his flask seems to kind of hearken back to NASA branding. Yeah. Wow. Don't get this fucking shit. Get a cheap hip flask from one of those key engraving

or whatever places. That also sells belt buckles. Get something funny engraved on it while you're there. Yes. Yeah. Also if they're selling this shit in these tins and the so the two, what is there a third variant? Pineapple Agave Jesus Christ, pineapple tequila. Come the fuck on now. Is that what's happening? Try it? I'd give that a tase. Not from this brand. I'm just saying I'm just saying that like this is going the to to to the to to the most to the most the most to to the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most the most task. Not from this brand. I'm just saying, I'm just saying that like this is going to be the most white-labeled dog shit alcohol that they are pouring some flavor into and then jacking into these things. Like, this is like that shit where um where people go like oh I'm I'm gonna make my own business and their business is buying like hundreds of very large cans of olive oil and putting it into their own bottles and then

putting a funky label on them and saying, hey, check out this cool olive oil. This fucking sucks piss. Found in 2023 Departed, departed spirits were set up to make premium spirits fun. That means serious spirits in very unserious flavors. Shut up! Shut up! Shut up for drinking, not quaffing, sipping or spitting. What do you mean spitting? What do you mean?

What do you mean? Why wouldn't I sip it if it's nice? Why wouldn't I quaff it if it's nice. Why wouldn't I cough it if it's nice? Why are you telling me at what speed to drink your fucking shitty drinks? You want to chug your drinks? That doesn't make him sound good? Why are you saying these are made for drinking, not a bunch of other words for drinking? Yeah, except for spinning. Why you did an AI right though? Did Oh my god? Surgical grade stainless steel for precise drinking operations. Does it really say that? Yeah, it does.

You people are dogs. Surgical grade stainless steel in the sense that both this and surgical equipment is made from stainless steel. And that's it. I like this. This is actually the same kind of stainless steel they made the Moonlander out of. Cut off. Take it half for this. It is 100% less breakable than glass. Yeah.

That sound right? I don't think that's how maths works at all. I don't think so. Hey, uh, marketing people being the most annoying fucking people on God's green earth. That's nothing to report. It's time for the nothing to report report report. It's the nothing to report, report, report, report, report, report, report, the nothing to report, report, report, report, the nothing to report, report, report. What happened?

Nothing. Shhh. Shhh. So you should mind your fucking business. It's the... Nothing to report, report, report, report, report. Nothing to report, report, report, report, report. Nothing to report, report, report, report. Nothing to report, report report, report. Nothing to report report. This is from KSNW in Kansas.

The snow. The K-Snow. Man in Sim Park was cutting dog's hair, not skinning them, WPD, says. Glad we settled that. That's a relief. Christ. Now, those two things as far as I understand it, very similar. It's so hard to tell the difference nowadays. Where do you draw the line? Yes. Between like cutting a dog's hair and ttell the difference nowadays. Where do you draw the line? Yeah, between like cutting a dog's hair and taking all the skin off its body. Yes. If you're at a distance, basically the same thing.

I remember watching Predator 2 and thinking, what's so bad about this guy? He's just taking a little off the top. What's everyone's, why's everyone so mad at him? He's just giving the people of New York? Where is he in the second one? It's LA. It's giving the people of LA beautiful haircuts. But here's the thing, they didn't want them. Yeah, which is also bad. You can't give a haircut to a person doesn't want a haircut. Yeah, roar, this looks good on my planet. He's given all the white people dreadlocks for one. Yeah, yeah. Please don't. Oh short top and long

sides? Gotcha. Giving you the Devon Townsend. I hope you enjoy this. The Wichita Police Departments that they haven't found any evidence to support animal abuse allegations in Riverside after the community raised concerns from a video posted online. Hold on, Ben, the predator does have the Devon Townsend. He does, he's smooth on top and he's got his little dreads on the side and the best. The best of both worlds. Sorry, go on. A news news from WPD said on April 20th, 420 smoke up, officers were following up on the report of alleged animal abuse at Sim Park, while there

they identified the individual who was videoed. WPD said the individual was quote, extremely cooperative and explained to officers that he used the location to trim his dog's hair. This guy's just giving his dog a haircut in a public park, minding his own business. He's probably a little buzzed. He's probably had a little sneaky Jay when he woke up. It's a great place to... Like three beers and then cutting your dogs out. Yeah, I know I mean I'm like buzzed on weed because it's 420 He was getting buzzed from the hair gut That's a great place to shave your dog. Yeah, thank you Why? You don't have to clean up the hair later. Yeah

Nature will take care of it the birds will eat it or something. Yeah, you'd think if someone was like skinning dogs that be I don't know, like evidence. Hey, I'll say this right off the bat. I am no skinning dogs expert, but I would have thought there maybe be like a lot of blood? Yeah. The sounds of dogs being killed, flayed if you will, and maybe a bunch of skin and blood and hair around. And so it's just hair. I would have thought that might be on the video even. Yeah.

WPD said officers were able to confirm that no dogs or animals were harmed at any time and have physically checked the individual's animals to confirm their health and hair cut. Oh, well, that's good. It looks good. It looks good. It looks good. It's interesting. I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that I wouldn't do that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that might that might might might might might might that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th. I would would would would th. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I would thi. I, it's fine. It looks good. It's good. Give him like the lion cut. It's interesting. I wouldn't do it for my dog, but it looks pretty decent. You've done a good job of it. I think the coloring was unnecessary, but it's not illegal.

Quote, at this time we have not found any evidence to support the allegations that this individual was skidding dogs at any time. If someone had my name in a press release where he said we couldn't find any evidence that they weren't skidding dogs at that time, I would be so mad. Like just, maybe you just say, this guy's probably never skinned a dog. Yeah, there's no reason to believe that he's skidding dogs. There's literally no reason to think that this guy was ever skidding dogs. You know what? We're not even gonna put a press release out because this is only just putting in people's minds the idea that this guy skids dogs.

Instead of saying, yeah, look, we couldn't find enough evidence to put him away for skinning dogs this time. He got off on a dog skidding technicality. It's like technically true, but don't say it like that. This is the fucking, this police report is the not involved in human trafficking shirt tweet is what they've done to him. It's like, no, no, no, we can't prove this guy was skidding dogs. What do you read?

What do you mean by that? Imagine like they invite you to the press conference and you get up there with them and they say we are unable to secure, we are unable to gather enough evidence to secure a conviction for skinning dogs at this time. Yeah. For this man, they say. We're putting this out on national TV to make everyone knows that this time we didn't get him for skidding dogs. But if you do see this man and you have a dog on you, hold him close.

Just in case we don't know. I can't prove it at this time. Hey, Skitting dogs? Probably a crime. It's time for crime watch. Hey, three, hey! This comes to us from K-O-C-O. De Cocoa. Thieves nab $30,000 worth of snow crab in Philadelphia heist, police say. Yum, yum, yum. That's a lot of crab. Or is it not a lot of crab.

Thieves nab $30,000 worth of snow crab, $1,000 per kilo, perece. Yum, yum, yum. That's a lot of crab. Or is it not a lot of crab. I don't know how much snow crab costs per kilo personally. You know what you're right I'm assuming that's a lot of crab. Maybe it's like saffron maybe that's like two crabs. Yeah. Maybe the crabs are really big. Maybe it's one really big snow crab. Now we're talking. The problem is of course, you can't get it, you can't get $30,000 worth of crab into the fridge, and you are now in a race against time. Yeah, that's true.

You're trying to eat. Not even if you have like a garage fridge, that's not going to be enough. Crab for breakfast, crab. You're going to get sick of snow crab. God, I'd kill any other kind of crab at this point. Three days in, I'm starting to wish I didn't steal $30,000 worth of snow crab. By one regret, stealing $30,000 worth of snow crab. For myself, not to sell. For my own enjoyment a wider community. But also I don't trust anyone. That's what this life of crime has driven me to. If I was a normal member of society, I would

put on Facebook, Snowcrab bake. I might even say free. I thi. I th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I on Facebook snow crab bake. I might even say free, I might even say free snow crab. Yeah, come on down. Bring a cooler. Grab some snow crab. I've got to put this snow crab on buy-sell swap. See if I can get like a black light poster for it. Yeah, yes. I would trade a compact car for $30,000 worth of snow crab. The irony of course. The irony is that if you had some friends, you know, if you hadn't been driven by this life of crime into isolation, you could share the crab with your friends. Can you imagine the snow crab spaghetti dinner that you could have for like, everyone on your street? Have a street party, close the street off.

Have a crab bike on your street. Oh my God party. Close the street off. Have a crab bike on your street. Oh my god. Guys, come on. From 3 p.m. We're closing the street. Kids can ride their bikes. There's not going to be any traffic. We'll get a couple of grills going. We'll get some music going. Do the crab clown. Craig does home brew. Craig, why don't you bring that homebrew out? I know that you make more than you can drink. Come on. We'll crack open a few home brews and we'll have a crab spaghetti. Some snow crab bake, little snow crab dessert. Yeah. Maybe a perfect afternoon, but instead,

crab toflay. You're so scared that the cops are going to find out. You're not telling anyone. You're sitting in life in 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30 30, and that would be the saddest possible way for it to go, is that you do have your crab street party. Yeah. You're playing under the sea over the hi-fi, everybody laughs. Oh, that's a good one.

That was a good bag. He slipped it in among some yacht rock. Everyone's got,this, Craig? Yep. And then like, you know, it's the afternoon, the sun's going down, beautiful pink hues in the sky. Everybody's just kind of sitting back, belly, full fit to burst of snow crab. Everybody's had like three or four lagers, you know, a little teeny.

You're watching the Phillies game. You set up a, you draped a white sheet over the front of the Robertson's house. You got a projector to go the big game. Oh my god, you're in heaven. Your neighbor Tony said, I've actually got a projector. It works pretty good outdoors. And you go get that thing right now. Yeah, I get it. And then, you know, just as you're all, you're all sitting there. You're all sitting there. You're all sitting there. The Seattle

Mariners hit a pop-up fly. They're just about to catch it. And then the cops are there. You. We want to talk to you about this crab. How's it going to feel to everybody in your neighborhood they were having the best block party that they've ever had not just the best they can remember the best they've ever had and the day is ruined at the end by you being carded away in front of all the kids crying pissing your pants yeah all the kids all the kids all the neighborhood kids and everybody has to sit there knowing they got a belly full of stolen crap yeah they've been betrayed they they they they they they they they they they th they they th th th they they th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th that that that they they they they they they they they that they're they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they the the the the the the their the the the the te te te te te te te tell tell te tell te tell te they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they got a belly full of stolen crab. Yeah. I bet it doesn't taste so good now does it? Now that you know that it was illegal.

I'm going to get this out of me. That was blood crab. I'll never forget the night of the blood crab. Don't talk to me about that. I can't. Didn't you guys go to like a street party or something? No, I never did. I've never been to a street party. I wasn't there. I wasn't there. If I was there, I would have been allergic to shellfish actually. Yeah. I'm allergic to specifically snow crab eaten with friends. I don't do that.

I was actually at that game. I was at the game. Yeah. At the top of the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth the eighth I I the eighth I was the eighth I was the eighth I was the eighth I was the eighth I was the eight the eight I was that I was the that I was the that I was the that I was that I was that I was that I was that I was that I was that I was that I was that I was the the the the the the the the the the the the the the that I was that I I I I was that I I I I I I I I I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. th. th. that. S. S. I was the. I was the the. I was. I was actually at that game. I was at that fly as well. I was at the game. Yeah. Bottom of the ninth, I was there. Yeah. Chop of the eighth, I was there as well. Yeah. Yeah, it was there for the whole thing. Bottom of the seven. Bottom of the fifth. There are two. I was there. I mean if I was there or wouldn't have gone down like that. Yeah. that's why I the I was I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the top the top. the top. the top. I was the top. I was the top. I was the the the the top. I was the the top. I was the top. I was the top. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was the top. I was the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was th. I was the th. I was th. I was the th. I was there. I was tho. I was tho. I was tho. I was tho. I was tho. I was tho. I was tho. I was tho. I was there was Wahlberg 9-11 thing, but for this crab party, if I was there, if I was there or wouldn't have gone down like that, I would have put a stop to it. As soon as he came out, I would have been like, hold up. I've just seen the news where this fucking crab come from. Where did you buy that crab? Kroger? How many pounds of snow crab did you say you got? And what's the price per pound of snow crab at the moment? Kroger are publics? How much? How much per kilo?

How much per per pound? What would you say is the street value of this crap? How many gallons of crab was this? Piggly, wiggly? piggly-wiggly? I think that pigly-wiggly for sure in Philadelphia. I think they got Kroger in Philadelphia, right? Wawa. I got the Wawa. You got the crab at Wawa? Wawa?

This is a craudra, snow crab. I got a couple hundred pounds of snow crab. their wawaa for my friends. You didn't say wawa theirwawawawawawa snow crab all the time. Just because I have snow crab doesn't mean it's stolen snow crab. Hey look, either you were responsible for that snow crab heist that's all over the news, or you got together and you just got hundreds of people's free Easter snow crab vouchers. That's probably what it was. Cashed them all in at once. And you expect me to believe that? You expect me to believe everybody out there traded in their points and got you

a free Easter snow crab just out of the goodness of their hearts. And that, you should do that. If you're living in Philly and you've got enough points to get your free east of snow crab street party. Yeah, I can keep it to yourself. Lazy Sunday? Sunday afternoon into Sunday evening? Everybody did bed by night? Bottom of the ninth crab bake? Bottom the ninth crab bake for everyone. Top of the eighth. Crab spaghetti. Philly wins, all these crab legs flying up in the air. Woo! We sure showed the Mariners. We've been studying America for so long. It's like we're almost Americans.

It's like we're there. We're like, we're a lot like criminal profilers of the TV shows of the mid-2000s, you know. We can, we can fully inhabit the mind of the American at this point. Yeah, I'm kind of the Spencer Reid of the show. I'm sort of the will whatever his name is of Hannibal. Will he fuck Hannibal? Will Graham? Very tense. Will Graham.

Yeah, Will Grimes. An investigation is underway after, that was the headline, by the way. Literally zero sentences into the headline, by the way. That's how far we go into that. Literally zero sentences into the story. An investigation is underway after thousands of dollars worth of snow crab was stolen from a freight liner truck in Philadelphia last week. Should have left the keys in it. It happened outside of Walnut in the Philadelphia Mills Shopping Center. WPVI reports the truck driver was assaulted as he tried to stop the thieves.

That's that's insured, you know, that's the company's crab. You know, that's the company's crab. Yeah, you don't have to defend the crab. If anyone anywhere is trying to steal something from your work, walk away. Walk away. Stand back, hold your hands up. Crab not important. Stand back, hold your hands up, you say, no crab off my nose, you know. Crab not important. Only life important.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. The suspects made off with crabs from a refrigerated trailer. Quote, it was Grandpa Harvey's snow crabs. Poor Grandpa Harvey's snow crabs. Poor Grandpa Harvey's snow crab. It was gonna have a snow crab back. Now despite my ability to inhabit the American mind, I'm familiar with Grandpa Harvey's snow crab.

I believe it's a brand. It's gotta be a brand. It wasn't just Grand Prampas. Craphe's like a very well-known local figure. Local fishermen. But you put Grandpa Harvey's snow crab into Google and you're getting all this story. Yeah, right. Do you think this is like, you know in mob movies where low-level criminals try and

rob like a mob owned poker game or a bank or something? The truck drivers being like, do you know who snow crab this is? Do you know what the fuck you're doing? This is Grandpa Harvey's snow crabs. You're dead. You're a dead man. Good good good luck looking over your shoulder for the rest of your fucking life, never knowing when Grandpa Harvey's gonna catch up with you. The problem, Ben, is that in the article that you have here, um, Grandpa, Grandpa, it says grand, what does it say? Grand Par Harvey.

But then I'm looking at premium seafood's groups website about the products that they sell. And they've got their listed as Grandpa Harvey. Grandpa. Grandpa. Americans be saying Grandpa. And that seems to be more. For a lot of seafood companies that are selling. Grandpa Harvey!

Brand Atlantic Snow Crab. Processed Impact a PSG's Canadian facility using high quality Atlantic Snowcrap. Got a price, price per pound on that? You got a PPP on that snow crab? Mark? PPP on that snow crab, Mark? What? PPP for that? Last week's PPP snow crab?

Philadelphia, Walmart? Wow, they really be shipping their stuff all over the world. Well, it seems like Grandpa Harvey is the wholesaler, so they're going to cut this crab before distributing it on turns into seafood extender, I think, is when you've chopped up the crab enough, you know? It was Grandpa Harvey Snow Crabbs, like two pallets, approximately 100 boxes. It was valued at $30,000 Captain Jack Ryan of the Philadelphia Police Department said. Now we are talking about the main character from the Hunt for Red October.

Yeah, and the Somerville Fears. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, this is the clear and present danger. Jack Ryad. Patriot Games. Uh, police said there were up to 12 people and four vehicles involved in the heist. Really, because I was wondering how you get in two pallets. Yeah. That's like, that's planning.

That's a shitload of planning an organization. That's a big fucking crew. That's bigger than the crew that they used in the movie Heat. That's exactly what I was just thinking. That's bigger than heat. Damn, this crew is good. This crew is good, real good. How much are you getting on this snow crab, you reckon?

Like a resale. They're going to be selling it for like a quarter of the price. So what, you got 12 people selling like 7 grand of snow crab? Probably not going to sell it all before it goes bad. Because I mean, yeah, we're always all joking about how like, you know, cops get like a few grams of something and they go, this is, this is worth $90,000 on the street. And the reality is the complete opposite, right? Anything that you are stealing, you are selling for less than the value that it takes

to buy from a legitimate outlet. Oh, this crab fell off the back of a truck being driven by a man I was assaulting. That I had to put it back at the truck because I stole the truck as well. Oh, shit. I want the truck. There's, if you're splitting seven grand between 12 people, that's just, it's not going particularly far for a like, for a heist where you've like beat up a truck driver. Surely there is an aspect of this too where everybody's just taking a box of crab for themselves and giving a bit of crab to their neighbors and shit.

Oh you've taken some snow crab off the top for sure. Yeah, just giving a little snow crab. Like it'd be like if you jack a cigarette truck I'm ta them. Yeah. I'm taking up smoking. If I have a hijack a cigarette truck, I am taking up smoking. You'd be losing money by not smoking. Yeah. You're having a crab bag, like if you're involved in this house. This is kind of what I'm thinking though. If you're getting such a small amount of money from this, why not. And then you'd have to do the work the work the work the work to do the work to do the work to do to do the work the work to do to do the work the work to do the work to do the work the work to do the work to do the work to do to do to do the work to do to do the work to do to do the work to do to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the thoing the the thoing the thi. the. the the the. the the the the the the. the. thea. thea. thea. theinging. tooing. th crab for the street part for the crab bag. Yeah

I thought you were going to accuse grandpa Harvey Do you think it's like an insurance scam? Oh? So he's he's doing the snow crab bake But he doesn't want to pay for it. So he's stolen it from himself then he's getting paid? He's getting paid $30,000 and then he gives the seven grand to the crab thieves and they th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. to the to to thi. the thi. the to to the thi. the the the the the the the their their their their their their the the their their their their their to their to tooes tooes tooes tooes to to to to to to to to to to to tooes. tooes. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. Grap. Grap. Grap. Grap. Grap. Grab. Grab. Grab. Grab. Grab. Grab. C. C. C. C. Grab they. C. C. they. they. they. Grab. C. they. Grab. Grab. Grab they. Grab. Gra. I's. I's. I'll. I'llousand dollars. And then he gives the seven grand to the crab thieves and they all get a little crab to take home. They'll get invited to the crab bag. Oh of course they're going to the crab bake. They're laughing together. Everybody's curesing, their cans of cause light, cheering when the fillies, when the fillets catch the thi. Yeah, when the fillies, when the fillies, when the fillies, when the fillies, when the filies, when the filies, when the filies, when the filies, when their their their their their the filies, when the filies are their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their theeea, thi. They'll thi. thea' thea' thea'lough.ea' all get all get all get all get all get all get all get all get thea' thea' thea oh no sorry it's the mariners who hit the pop-up fly and the fillies catching it. No, the marinas are crestfallen to be clear. Yeah, because they've lost in the

tug-out, yeah, because they've lost in the tug-out. Yeah, because they've won. They won the today. the mariner's, you're they're the mariner's, you's, you's, you's, you's, you're, they're, the marinas, they're, the marinas, they're the marinas, they're the marinas, the marinas, the marinas, the marinas, they're the marinas, the the the the th's, th's th's their crest, their crest, their crest, their crest, their crest, their crests their crest. Their crest. The their crest. The their crest. The their crest. The their crest. Their crest. Their crest. Their crests, th's th's th's th's are crests, th's, th's th's th's th's a crests, th's a crests, th's a crests, the's a crestfallen's crestfallen's crestfallen's crestfallen's crestfallen, thea' crestfallen, thea' crestfallen, thea' crested-s, threst-a'er's game, no crab for us. And how do they know about the crab? How do they know about the crab? Everyone the Phillies keeps talking about how they go into a crab bag after us. I think this goes all the way to the top. Everybody's in on this. I think that game was fixed. What is happening in think it is. I think it's safe to say that we can intuit things like this. Yeah, we've been studying Americans for a really long time. We're sort of the Will Graham treated at the scene. The station reports that there have been several instances of major cargo thefts in the

area of late. Police say if any truck drivers find themselves in a similar situation, the best advice is to not intervene and to call 911. Yeah, don't fucking crab. They probably would have given you some fucking crab. Like if you just let it happen, you know? Don't fucking get in the way. They probably would have given you some fucking crab. Like if you just let it happen, you know? I am suddenly picturing Mads Mickelson's Hannibal Lecter, but he's got like the seafood bib on. I don't think that Hannibal Lecter would fuck with eating with a plastic bib on.

I don't think he would eat Grandpa Harvey's snow crabs. He's getting more exotic seafood. And of course he's also he's he's th, and, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just th- th- th- th- the, just just just th- th, just just just th, just just just just th, just just just just just th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th, just, just, just just just just, just just just just just just just just just just just, th, th, th, th, th th th th th the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the- just thea thean thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' thea' theat the the with eating with a plastic bib on. I don't think he would eat Grandpa Harvey snow crabs. He's getting more exotic seafood. And of course he's also eating man. Yeah. And the people too. He's eating people as well as better quality snow crab. Not to impugn Grandpa Harvey, but I think he's getting a better cut of fish. It sounds like a great quality snow crab,

but it is sad looking at the site, which lists like, if you search for Grandpa Harvey snow crab, like I have done in the past, you will get, like there are obviously some kind of wholesaler, and you get like all of the seafood markets around the world that it say we're selling Grandpa Harvey's stuff. And yeah, like British place selling Canadian snow crab. I don't like to think about how far food is moving to get somewhere that depresses me greatly. Yeah, that's not a good sign.

That's a bad vibe. Think globally, eat snow crab locally. Think globally, do local crab heists. Yes. Yeah, don't steal crab that's come from the other side of the world. Steal crab that came from your own backyard. Yeah, if possible, rob a local fisherman at gunpoint. That's right. Go down to the co-op and just sort of wave a Winchester around. Get some bar for your family. Rob the wawa. Yeah, go, to, to, to, to, to, the the to, the woob, give, give, give, give, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go the woob, go the woob, the woob, the woob, the wa, the wa, the wa, the wa, th, th. Gob, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. Get some barra for your family. Rub the wawa.

Yeah, go down to the wawa. Give me some GD Snow Crab. Yeah. Hey, that was definitely an episode of the podcast, Bunch of Vista. I definitely also have recorded a little audio tag before the theme song starts telling you this information, but we're doing a live show.

Which you probably would have heard about at the start of the episode. But yeah, that's happening on June 15th at Newstead Brewing Co here in beautiful Brisbane. We have done a live show before. It was for about 30 people in Gimpy. There were only three of us there. This time there will be all four of us. It is going to be substantially larger than that. That. That. That. That. That's, that, that, that, that, that, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th is th, th is thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi's thi's thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii's thi, thi, thi, th. This time there will be all four of us. It is going to be substantially larger than that. That's right, 35 people. 35, that's right. We did give our paid, our paid subscribers a little early taste to the tickets, but there's still, there's still enough there for the rest of you. It's going to be lots of fun. We're going to do a basically just a regular episode, maybe a little bit longer. And then Andrew and I are gonna, I'm gonna play some records for a little while, I think,

because we've got the venue for a couple hours after the show finishes, so all of you guys can meet each other and be awkward at each other and shit. And we can drink some beers. I can have a delightful Newstead Brewing Co. And I'm probably gonna drink about 20 of those and then embarrass myself in front of everyone. It's my plan. Yeah. So that should be good. No cameras. No cameras. No cameras. No cameras. No filming, no photos. We will get a recording of the episode whether or not we released to the public at large is yet to be seen. But I know that there are people that thea. that thiii. that tho that tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that's that's tho. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to thi. thi. thoooooooooooooo. they. they. they. they. they. they. toe. thooooooooooooooooooe. No, that's to that's to to to th there are people that cannot feasibly make it to Brisbane, Queensland would probably want to hear that.

So you know, we'll have to think about it. But for now, Bonavista.com slash live, that'll take you to the ticket page. Yeah, stay safe out there. It's a crazy world. If someone tries tothen walk away. It depends. Am I coming to the crab bake? Yeah. I heard you guys talking about a crab bake and you're all smiling and laughing. So like a, sounds like it's going to be a really fun time. You guys seem like you have a great rapport with each other, really easy chemistry. I feel like we got the chemistry right now, maybe. I don't know. How about this. How about this? How about I tell my bosses that I didn't see anything or anyone

And you tell me where the crab bake is? Yes A little tip for tap. Little quid pro quo. Little crib for crab. Little crib for crab. We will see you next week and we will see you on June 15th in Brisbane Queensland. No, it's in Brisbane Queensland. See soon. Bye-bye! you to the to