Boonta Vista - EPISODE 353: Thelma & Louising In Separate Cars

Episode Date: July 7, 2024

Lucy, Theo, and Ben bring you: A beautiful relationship betwixt woman and fish, one extremely disgruntled Dutch man, a follow-up on Jimmy the Hairdresser, and the RIPing Report. *** Support our show a...nd get exclusive bonus episodes by subscribing on Patreon: www.patreon.com/BoontaVista *** Email the show at mailbag@boontavista.com! Call in and leave us a question or a message on 1800-317-515 to be answered on the show! *** Twitter: twitter.com/boontavista Website: boontavista.com Twitch: twitch.tv/boontavista

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello and welcome, Bruntavista. It's actually a beautific way of I drink and I'm hoping. Goodie. Hello and welcome, Wunter Vista, episode 353. I am Ben and I am here at Westminster Abbey on the 6th of September 1997. That's right. I'm here at the funeral for Diana, Princess of Wales. All right, okay. Thousands have gathered here and millions watch on at home as we pay tribute to a woman who truly was the people's princess.
Starting point is 00:00:48 A who's who of royalty, celebrities and dignitaries is taking turns eulogizing the life of this singular figure. And we join now as another takes their place to the podium. Clearing his throat comedically, it's Mr Bean. It's Theo. I was going I th th th I was gonna take that one actually. I need you for the next one. I don't know what noise does Mr. Bean make? I think he makes that noise. Yeah, really. And here I'm like acting out a perfect pantomime a British crown car hired to harass lady dies car through the tunnels of Paris. And then you're doing a little act out so you like turning your body 90 degrees to make it clear you're another person.
Starting point is 00:01:34 And then you're putting your hand up to sort of shield your eyes from the lights. Oh! Oh! Coochoo! Swirming. Wow, what a powerful tribute. And up next it's our next speaker. It's Austin Powers. Hi Lucy. Groovy baby. Yeah. Do I make you Randy? Yeah. That's actually pretty good. Yeah, thanks. She led a truly groovy life. It would sort of be like that, I guess. Yeah, he'd say like, Princess Diana make me horny baby. Yeah, kind of like that?
Starting point is 00:02:15 Yeah. That's that working. Oh, it's just the fucking Scooby-do at this point. I think there's a bit of overlap and that is the improv portion of the podcast complete. All right. Now we get into- It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be actually. Yeah, it's kind of, it was character I'd like already had prepared.
Starting point is 00:02:34 Yeah, you've been preparing your entire life. I've been preparing my entire life for that. It wasn't wasn't too challenging. so good at Mr. Bean, eulogizing Diana. You know what, and I think if we had gotten, let's say, a Demi-type figure to do it, this could have easily been five to ten minutes. Yeah, now we've got to launch into this stuff. And it would have become like very severely sexually unhinged, yes. Like two minutes in. Yeah, they would have started introducing other elements. Yeah, they would have to thrived the thoen thoen tho tho tho tho to to to to to to to to to to to on it kind of. I would never sexualize Diana. And now we're hearing from Mr Bean's Pussy.
Starting point is 00:03:08 Yeah. Something like that. Yeah. Hey, for us to sort of just trail off after establishing some jokes we were maybe going to do more with, that's only natural for us. It's time for Nature Corner. This comes to us from K-A-R-E in Indiana. Oh, the today. So this is actually just like a little...
Starting point is 00:03:55 Oh, yeah, the care. It's a little update, a really tiny update on a story that they first published in 2020, but definitely still worth talking about, I think. Dockside friendship between woman and sunfish reaches nine years. Now I just want to get ahead of this. I don't want your imagination to run wild. I think there are two things that we would call a sunfish in the world. Oh yeah. So there's the stupid one that has both eyes on the top. Yeah the one that if it could talk would just kind of go, ooh, oh yeah. It's not that one. And then like an orca takes like three-quarters of its brain in one bite and it's like ooh-and-and-then it it keeps going for like 20 years. Yeah. So not that.
Starting point is 00:04:47 Not the Molomola. The massive. Not Molomola as populized by the game Molomola. Yeah, you remember the Molomola for a while and then I just didn't understand. What are you talking about? Lucy, did you miss out on Molomola? Oh you weren't there for mollomola? You weren't there for Molomola? Is this a game? It was sort of like a Tamagotchi, but for the fish that goes, Oh, oh, I see.
Starting point is 00:05:12 Yeah, when was this? It was like a month. Everyone was playing. I remember standing at the bus waiting for it. So it must have been 2018, 2019 I want to say. It seems like some 2019 stuff. It's got to be before that. I feel like it was before that. Uh, 27.
Starting point is 00:05:34 It was released in 2014. I'm seeing an article in 2015 that says, this crazy Japanese game lets you nurture an ocean sunfish. Yeah, that is crazy. That is crazy. It's Japan. It's the other type of sunfish, that's the thi. It's that, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's the thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, it's thi, thi, thi, thi, the the the the the the the the thi, thi, the thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi sunfish. Yeah, that is crazy. That is crazy. Japan. It's the other type of sunfish which is just like a small fish. Oh. Like it's just like it looks like a brim or something along those lines. He's just kind of like a normal fish. Why they why they call him that? Is he just the smallest kind of a sunfish. Pig me sunfishes? I don't think they're related. And I think I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I think it it it's I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thin. It's thi thi thi th. It's just kind th. It's just kind th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi theee an the an the an the an the an the an the an the the the the the he just the smallest kind of a sunfish? Pig me sunfish. I don't think they're related. And I think it's way funnier to be friends with the big dumb sunfish. That's way funnier. Yeah. It's kind of like boring. Floats up with its big like moon head onto the top of the thing. You throw some bread on top of the moon.
Starting point is 00:06:19 Yeah. This fish doesn't know you exist. That's a more, I. Well... That's tough. That's tough. Uh, this spring, just after ice out, Greenie the sunfish once again returned to Holly's dock. This marks the ninth summer Holly and Greenie will spend together. So that's the update.
Starting point is 00:06:41 Again. Like they're not cohabitating. Yeah. How they're going to do anything together? No, I don't think, I don't think that some fishes slurp in her gir. I don't think he has higher functioning. I don't think this is going to be like that, um, the situation from episode 8 of the dolphin.
Starting point is 00:07:02 This is an dollop dolphin thing where she lives in an apartment that's filled with water so that her and her and Greenie can like max out on the couch together. Yeah. Yeah, is the original story. Most Minnesota encounters with sunfish come at the end of a line. Yeah, because you're not talking about their land line. How you doing? No, no, no's wrong. Just want to chat. First of all, they don't live on land. Yes. It'd be a water line I guess. Yeah. Holly Yorganson has encounters
Starting point is 00:07:37 of another kind. Sexual. Quote digging for worms for a treat for greedy. Holly says, she scoops up soil with her shovel. It would be an unhinged thing to hear from someone, just context free. That's pretty unhinged. You just named the fish Greeny? Yeah, I think it's maybe a greenish, a green-tinged sunfish. If you find this article there are some photos of greeny, which to me getting photos of one specific small fish is very funny. Yeah, how do they? No, it's that one. It's not. All right. They'll probably go into it. How do they know? But they'll probably say. Oh, they say. It's very easy to tell. Okay. Clasping her hand in a wiggy bowl.
Starting point is 00:08:20 Clasping in her hand, a wiggly bowl. Clasping in her hand a wiggly bowl. Yeah. Yeah, you're going, you're sticking with it. To me, clasp is, what are you expecting me to say clasp? Yeah. Yeah, I guess so. Clasping? Kind of feel like this is a clasping podcast. Clasp. Claspping in her hand. A wiggly bowl. Yeah. Holly walks onto a wobbly wooden dock
Starting point is 00:08:50 while scanning the lake around her. Quote, there he is, she says. A sunfish looks up at Holly from a few inches under the water. So this is a fish, making direct eye contact with you for like a few inches under the surface in the water. Why does it know? Like, kind of more intelligent than we give them credit. If Jesse was on this podcast, he'd be so mad at us.
Starting point is 00:09:13 I don't give them very much credit at all. I think we give them too much credit. I think we give them too much credit. I think that's th you you you you you you you you you you you th you th you th you thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I'm thi thi thi thi. I'm thi. I'm thi that is that is tho tho thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more more thi. I'm more more thi. I'm more more thi. I'm more more more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more more more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi. I'm more thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi else gives them the exact right amount of credit. Oh fish credit George? Yeah, that's right, statistical outlier. Quote, hi sweetie, Holly says, greeting, greeny. As much as a fish can show emotion, the sunny seems pleased to see her. Was he wiggling? Wiggling his little tail? That's all I can picture a fish showing emotion is just wiggling. But that's kind of his general move? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the the the the the the the the the th. Fish. Fish. Fish. Fish the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi the the thi. Fish credit the thi. Fish credit the thi. Fish credit the the thi all I can picture a fish showing a motion is just wiggling. But that's kind of his general move also. Yeah, they kind of do that to move and also to stay stationary.
Starting point is 00:09:53 It's kind of the thing that they do. So this is sort of, this is like 90% projection by volume. I don't think it's any projection at all. I think you are th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. that's that's kind of that's kind of thi that's kind of that's kind of that's kind of that's kind that's kind thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi thi. thi thi. thi thi thi thi thi. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that's thi thi that's that's thi that's kind that's kind of thi thi thi thi think you were going to get to the end of this article and your heart will be changed entirely. Oh, all right. I want to reconsider some things. Holly puts her hands into the water. Other fish dart away. Greenie comes closer. Hi, honey, Holly says to Greenie. Holly wasn't looking for a power when she first locked eyes with the green sunfish just off her dock. Okay. Always comes when the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to the to to to to to to to the to the to to to to the to to to to to to to the the to th. I thine thi. I the the thi. I thi. I thi. I tho. I to consider to consider to consider to consider to consider to consider tho. I tho. I thoes. I thoes thoes. I thine. I thine. I thine. I thine. I thine. I thine. I thine. I thine. I thine thinine thinine thin. I thin. I thin. I thin. I thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. the. thin. the. thin. thin. the. thinnenenenecons it, you know. Yeah, I wasn't initially scanning the lake for a friend.
Starting point is 00:10:29 Great, but he looked at me like I've never had a fish look at me, she says. Go on. From fish eyes grew a fast friendship. Whoever wrote this has such a beautiful turn of phrase. Yeah, it's really nice. This is delightful. Journalists will love to show that they know what alliteration is. Yeah. I also think there's kind of a nice cadence to this, a nice rhythm.
Starting point is 00:10:54 Yeah, it's pleasant. Someone's been reading Ursula Leguins, steering the craft. Holly holds out one of the newly harvested worms. Can you jump? She asked Green. Can he? Moments later, he complies. Coming up from the deep to jump for Holly's treat. Oh my God, I just tricks.
Starting point is 00:11:13 He's a trained fish. He's a trained fish. Yeah. Quote. He sure does seem like a special fish, Holly says. He just acts different from other fish. Even before Holly began serving snacks, Greenie would be waiting at the dock when she arrived for her daily swims. Damn. Quote, why he in particular recognizes me and looks at me the way he does and follows me around, I don't know, but it's wonderful, Holly says.
Starting point is 00:11:41 She's really, she's really having some emotions on this one. It's not like other fish. He's not like other fish, okay? I can't even get a fish to text me back, you know. Yeah. Every other fish is either taken or gay. There's a lot of gay fish. Each spring, Holly waits for ice out. For five straight years, so this is from four years ago I guess,
Starting point is 00:12:12 Greenie has been back at the dock when open water returns. Quote, and I go, wow. He made it through another winter, Holly says. Winter's hard on a sunfish. Yeah, I guess. I guess. Greenie isn't alone in the lake. A smaller sunfish, Holly named Spot, used to tag along with Greenie. Then a bass named Slim became a frequent Greenie cohort. You know how in like Ratatoui, how Remy, the main rat from Ratatoui is sort of develops a relationship with humans because he's, because of his culinary taste and his interest in human world, I guess. And then he ro, the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, a thi, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small small small, a small small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, a small, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, is ss, the main rat from Ratatoui, is sort of, develops a relationship with humans because he's, because he's culinary taste and his interest in the human world, I guess.
Starting point is 00:12:48 And then he ropes other rats into it. That's what this fish is doing. You think that's what this fish is doing. Come and hang out, but they're not really into it. They don't like it that much. for secondary Pixar movie characters. Yeah, second character's for sure. Because he's got like a few little funny lines, little one-liners, that's it. Spot's always eating and Slim's really tall and skinny. Yeah, and he's from New Jersey.
Starting point is 00:13:13 Yeah, for some reason. It's like a guy that's been in a bunch of mafia movies is forcing him. But she can't, the, Greenie can't complete the Fisher-Tooey because he, because he, because he, because, because, because, because, because, th, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, th, th, thi, the, thi, th, th, th, th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, theean, thean, thi. thean, thi. thean, thi. thean, thi. thi. thean, they, because he can't reach her hair. That is the one element from this that's missing, yeah. I guess maybe it would be like... The ratatouying from ratatouying from ratatoui? If we sort of adjusted it better, maybe if she like, if Greenie tickled her feet or something and that did it.
Starting point is 00:13:38 Oh. Oh, the chin rubs Holly regularly administers. Oh, oh. Oh, this sentence. My little grid sharp. Greenie is large by Sunfish standards. Large enough to fill a medium-sized frying pad. Don't just say that.
Starting point is 00:14:03 Come on! How you're going to kill him and eat him. I think the person who wrote this was like a little bit hungry at the time. For obvious reasons, Holly asked that we not divulge the location of her lake. Smart. She's a smart woman. Yes. This is like the lady always keeps her lake under wraps. Yes. People will want to go and see, the moment this hits
Starting point is 00:14:28 medium-sized Australian comedy, current events podcast, Buntavista, people are going to flock to that lake, like it's a pilgrimage to see Greenie? What if you realize that Greenie's just friendly with everybody? He's just kind of a flirty guy. Yeah, he just flirts with everyone. Yeah. Devastating. It would be devastating. Imagine if you were so excited to tell the reporter, and then he immediately starts doing tricks for the reporter. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:52 You just walk into the lake. Yeah. He's go pick up some rocks, put him in your pocket. Walk straight to the lake. you want, Greenie? I think you'd like this. I guess you'll be happy with just any what. Quote, actually, she says, last Friday night, he showed up and he had a hook in his mouth. My heart just sank. That's devastating. But he survived. But he survived. Tough bastard, that Greeny. Yeah. Holly held Greenie in her hands as she gently pushed on the hook. Quote, and I just very, very carefully backed it out and put him back in the water, Holly said, and then we were both relieved.
Starting point is 00:15:29 Is he wriggling his body? Is that how you know? That's what he does when he's relieved? Yeah, probably. He's touching it. He's putting his little fin to the, to where the hook was in his face and to where, the where, the the the hook, the hook, and the hook, and the hook, and the hook, and the hook, and the hook, and the the hook, and the the hook, and the, and the, the, the, the, the, and the, the, and the, and the, the, and the, the, the, the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th..... the the, the, the the, the, the the the. the. the. the. the. the. And, the. And, the, the, there. And then he's making direct eye contacts that like obviously he can't manipulate his face because he's a fish and that's just sort of off the cards. I have no brows or anything like that. There's no expressive elements but you can tell by the intensity of the stare he's saying I see you. I see you and thank you. You see me. We see each other thank you. We are soul kin. Our souls are intertwined. You are a fish kin. Yes, you are a friend of the fish. You are a fish kin.
Starting point is 00:16:10 I will... Do you feel more at home in the water than you do on land? There's a radio lab episode from ages ago that's sort of about like the limits of animal intelligence and how much we project intelligence onto them. That's got a little story about some divers that cut a, I think it was a humpback whale, maybe a humpback, free from a net it got tangled in. And then it just like swam away and then it swims back up and then makes purposeful eye contact from one eye with each of them, like all three of the guys stops just a little bit of, just checking, and to to to to to to to to to to to be like, th, th, the th, th, th, their their th, just th, their th, th, th, their th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, their their their their their their their their their their their, their, their, th, their, th, their, th, th, th, th, their their th, th, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thi, thi, thi, thi, thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii, thiiiii, thii, their, their, their, their of them, like all three of the guys stops just a little bit of, just checking in and be like, hey, I see you. I see you. I see you. I see you are a friend of the whale.
Starting point is 00:16:52 I mean you get. I mean you get. It would be pretty cool. Which, it's probably not like an intentional active communication. But what if it is, it'd be pretty cool. Would be pretty cool. Who can say? I think that every single expert they talked to in the episode was just like, probably not.
Starting point is 00:17:12 But maybe. But maybe, probably isn't. But maybe, probably isn't. But maybe we don't know. It probably isn't. Uh, when Holly swims the other side of the lake, Greenie has been known to to to to to to to to to to to that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. the that's. that's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the the thi the thi thi to thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thithe lake, Greenie has been known to tag along. That's a fucking great time. Yeah, that's pretty cool actually. You're just swimming along and you're like a fish, it's like, where are we going today?
Starting point is 00:17:33 Oh, other side of the lake? Awesome. I'm back again? Cool. Great. I'm having the time of my life. This side is actually my favorite. what I do miss the other side of the little let's go back I'm just having the best day often she lingers in the water shoulders deep near the dock as greeny swims around her quote people complain about no entertainment no movies no bars no restaurants I can care less Holly says I've got this simply simply befriend a fish simply you know what instead of looking at your phone on Hopping on Netflix. Is she talking about the fact that their town has none of these things?
Starting point is 00:18:11 There's no entertainment, no movies, no bars, no restaurants? Maybe. Oh. Well, she's just a dying town situation. Yeah, she's too busy at the lake, hanging out with her fish. Winter must be hard for her when the ice comes. Yeah, she's got no one. Yeah. No fish, no entertainment, no bars, no bars, no bars, no restaurants. You'd be worried about him all the time too, like, is he all right out there? You know? That he doesn't come back. Is he got any worms? Is anybody rubbing his worms? Yeah. Who's he flirting with in warmer waters right now? Yeah, who's he met elsewhere, you know? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:46 Actually, I don't know if the... He's probably lake-bound. He's probably just under the ice. It's probably not that he's gone somewhere where there is ice. Oh, he doesn't go and have like a second family in New Jersey. Yeah, I think it's probably the le. He's probably the limit of his world. So enamored is Holly, she wrote Greenie a poem. Oh, okay. To have a friend who's not like me is to swim in the sky and fly in the sea, Holly recites.
Starting point is 00:19:14 That's lovely. That's really nice. That's beautiful. That's really nice, Holly. That's lovely. She's titled the poem, Diversity. I'm not sure. Well, because there's lots of different types of people in the world. There are different kinds of there, the ones that fly in the ocean. So you can kind of use this poem if you have a black friend or something as well, maybe like re-purpose. Oh, you remind me of this fish that I swim with sometimes. Like if one of your friends is a Filipino ancestry. It's sort of like swimming in the sky and flying in the
Starting point is 00:19:45 sea. Yeah. Quote, it's entering someone else's world, she says. I don't know if she's drawing parallels there between putting yourself in the mindset of someone of a diverse background based on sharing the experiences of a fish. She's really trying to make a point about something. I'm getting the impression this lady maybe has a lot of crystals in her home. Yeah, definitely. She's an impasse. Sure, but they're working. Where's a lot of purple. Dream catches?
Starting point is 00:20:16 Like, incense, dream catches. She doesn't mean anything negative by having them. No, no, no, no, no. She means. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the the the th. the the the th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tha. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. thi. thi. thi well, but she does have a lot of them. Yeah, like heaps. And lots of like the sage that they tell you not to use because it's like buying up all the reserves that people that use them as a traditional practice need them for. Is that a thing? Yeah, you've got to make sure you're getting that ethical stage. Bad energies out or whatever. If you're smudging your home with an unethical sage, you are putting in an unbelievably bad vibes into your house. It's doing the exact opposite of what you should be doing. Mm-hmm. Check up on your ethical sages.
Starting point is 00:20:59 For many Minnesotans, Sunfish remain a nice catch. Yeah, and for her too. Yeah, but a different kind. Yeah. But in the most stressful of years, Greenie gives Holly Jorgensen her release. He's the boss. Quote, you're the boss, aren't you? Holly tells Greenie as she looks down from the dock into the lake, you're the boss.
Starting point is 00:21:28 Hmm. What's funny there, Therear? Bruce Springsteed? That's the final line of the article, by the way. What a note to go out on. What is that? What do you mean? What do you mean? What do you mean? What do you mean? You're the boss. You're the boss. Whatever you say is goes. It's all for you, Greenie. It's like a god figure. You're kind of the king of this lake in a way. It would be very tragic
Starting point is 00:21:59 if Greenie suddenly died. And it's often very tragic when a person suddenly dies. We explore some of these tragedies in the Ripping Report. A 38 year old Ohio man died after getting struck by a roller coaster while attempting to retrieve keys that fell out of his pocket while he was riding that same roller coaster. What are the chances? That's not the first time there's another. I know a lot about roller coaster deaths. Russell a lot of roller coaster death videos on YouTube. Really? Fun backed about me.
Starting point is 00:22:48 I'm kind of quirky. Yeah. There's another one where a teenager went to get their hat that they lost off the tracks and got struck by the roller coaster. But there are roller coasters on the track. Yeah. So this he somehow managed to get into like a fenced offed to you're not allowed to go in because the roller coast goes. Yeah, because of the roller coaster. Yeah, so this sort of ties back to my big fear of not being in a places,
Starting point is 00:23:12 going into places that I'm not allowed to be in. Yeah, you just look, that guy was just looking for his toilet. He's got the big spoon. Yeah, he's watered in here. He's got the the water water water water. He's got water. He's got the the the the the the the th. He's got th. He's got to th. He's got th. He's got to to to th. He's got th. He's got th. He's got th. He's going. He's going. He's th. He's got th. He's thi. He's th. He's th. Hea. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's t. He's t. He's t. He's to. He's to. He's the to. He's the to. He's the th. He's the toy. He's got the loud rattleing on his giant wood and spoon. Hubcap. Man, that fucking sucks, but hey, at least you know that like, he probably had a pretty good day. On the day that he got up until the point. And he was up until the point he lost his keys. Yeah. Yeah. You'd be brave. Falling out. Like he was like, wee! Woo!
Starting point is 00:23:45 Oh, shit! That's going to be a problem. Little did you know. It was sort of the ultimate problem. Yeah, it's just the start of his problems. Did they say where this was? And then very soon the end. Very soon the ultimate end.
Starting point is 00:23:56 No, it did not. I mean it did. My notes, the to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, to, the, the, the, to, the, the, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th. th. th. th. th. th. the. tho. they. too. too. too. too. too. toda. too. the. too. the. the. too. the. was. Oh, you're sort of a coaster head, yeah. So we can look it up on RCDB. Did they fly the six flags at half-mast? I don't think they have six flags in Ohio. The six flags that have flown over Ohio. The Banshie? King Island Banshi at King Island. King's Island Banshee.
Starting point is 00:24:27 A King Island Banshia. An inverted roller coaster where the train dangles from the track. I wouldn't take my keys in that thing. You know just... Now that's got a high intensity value. You got to be careful building those. You know what a Banshee is? Mythologicallyically speaking.
Starting point is 00:24:44 It's the creature who's whailing that someone is about to die. It signals death. It's a death omen. So the last thing he heard was the raddling of the Banshee and then he's died. Which goes at 68 miles per hour, 109 kilometers per hour. Man, one more mile would have made that just a little... They should have called it a siren. Yeah, because it lured him to his death by making his keys fall out of his pocket.
Starting point is 00:25:13 Exactly why. Have they already added death to the Wikipedia article? Absolutely have. Yeah, incidents. Incidents. Oh, died two days later. Oh, jeez. This thing's crazy. I'm never going on one of thiiiiiiiiiiii. th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th.. th th th tha thus tho thus thus tho th. th. I th. I's th. I' thus. I'm thi. I'm th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. I'd th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to tho. to tho. tho. thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo' their tha. They'd tha. They're. Oh, I died two days later. Shit. That's not ideal.
Starting point is 00:25:26 This thing's crazy. I'm never going on one of these things. I'm a big roller coaster baby. Oh, I want to go on this. I want to go on this so bad. I've never been on a hanging roller coaster. I don't think there. I don't think thii. Isn't the, it used to be the lethal weapon ride. And now they've renamed it.
Starting point is 00:25:45 That's a hanging coaster. I've been on the, I've been on the Batman ride. That is the hanging on the coast. I've only been on there once. That's a fun, it's probably why I don't remember it so good. I really enjoy when people have the terminology for specific tycoon. Oh, I guess that makes sense. It's just something that I would never bother to learn about, and then for someone to be like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, no, that's like a reverse double inverted coaster
Starting point is 00:26:10 with two closed loops. Or I'm like, oh, when did you learn this and why? Rollercoast the tycoon? Yeah. Yeah. I mostly just sort of set it up so you could make one of the things go through the crowd and be like, ha ha, that's crazy. A 41-year-old South Carolina man died from quote, major head injuries after placing a lit firework on top of a quote large top hat he was wearing. Oh no. So this was um, it's July 4th, obviously. Oh no. Sorry, that's really funny. Hey guys, watch this.
Starting point is 00:26:46 He didn't put it under the hat? Check. Check this out. Yeah, you don't want your last words to be, hey guys, check this out. Yeah. From what I was reading a bunch of people... Before your head becomes compressed, fucking top hat firework. Apparently just like a bit of metal just went like straight into his head. Oh,. Yeah, and like there were a bunch of people around him that were like Hey, hey hey, hey, get that off there people like yelling at him to do it because they they're thought about it even slightly like get that get that fucking shit off their pal. Yeah, he didn't listen. Yeah, he didn't listen But hey it was only 41 so you know lived it lived a reasonable life. Yeah you had some experience probably never learned firework safety no it's 41 years no but they lived he died as he lived probably I just can't believe how cavalier they are about like fireworks in general but
Starting point is 00:27:41 also people are doing these like street parties where they're just getting crazy drunk. yeah and just having some fireworks like like, like yeah like, yeah like like, like, yeah, I, like, like, like, like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, they, they, they, they, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the, the, but also people are doing these like street parties where they're just getting crazy drunk. Yeah. My judgment's... Like, yeah, I don't know. Weird people, the Americans. I don't know if we've ever mentioned that before. This is from back in May. This one is also not about a person, but I thought still kind of fits the, the ripping report. A goat in Utah died after a chunk of ice fell off a plane, punched through the roof of
Starting point is 00:28:09 the goat shed that it was in, and then hit the goat killing it. Oh, that's a bad omen. That's not good. That's a word of God. That's an accession-style death, where like something from the dimension that you are completely unaware of just pops in. Yeah, it kills you. You've never thought about up before in your life. Nothing higher than like a medium-sized tree. No. And then bam. But also like people don't think about this. Like we get, we've read a couple of
Starting point is 00:28:40 stories over the last couple of years about chunks of ice falling off planes and then like damaging people's gutters or whatever. It's just so infrequent and so unlikely that it will hit something that matters just sort of based on how much of the earth's surface has stuff on it. That you don't even really consider it. So when it happens, people just don't know what to think. They're just like, where the fuck could this have possibly come from? It's like dealing with a UFO.
Starting point is 00:29:08 It is an accession. It's so far out of your normal experience. You have no idea how to contextualize it. And that's just ice. Like, imagine if an engine fell into your house and starting like, like a chain of events that was twin timelines that are different timelines yeah to universe yeah what if what if Frank hadn't woken you up and you hadn't wanted on to the golf course yeah if you chose to stay in bed because you knew what would happen if you did and otherwise yeah yeah and this happens every day yeah it happens to people like every single day.
Starting point is 00:29:45 Donnie Darko, that's pretty strange. Okay. You know what's even stranger? What are you talking about? The Netherlands. It's time for Netherlands quarter. Everybody. I'm from Holland.
Starting point is 00:30:00 Isn't that beer? I learned a horrible fact last night. Oh yeah. That Aruba is more than 60% Dutch Dutch Aruba. I'm learning about the Dutch Caribbean. It's really upsetting. They did a lot of colonialism as well, the Dutch, it turns out. They had a lot of boats.
Starting point is 00:30:23 They went and put their clothes on. Like a beautiful island, it's full of Dutch people. Yeah. Oh, I didn't realize it was part of the Kingdom of the Netherlands. It is part of the Kingdom of the Netherlands, the Dutch Antilles. Yeah, right. I would probably take that off the list in the song. It just doesn't sound sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds sounds to to to to to to the to the th so to anymore. It doesn't sound exotic. Yeah. Just say Bahamas twice.
Starting point is 00:30:47 This is from Dutch News. N.L. Angry driving instructor strikes again despite fines. Okay. So just, just to sort of get us primed in the right headspace, can you guys tell me what you think the circumstances are? Like, what is the angry driving instructor doing and to whom? Yelling, yelling at his students. I believe him to be hitting his students. Hitting his students, spanking him. He's taken off his slap him around. Yeah, giving him a whack. That was a rolling stop! students. That's why he's striking. He's taken off the middle of his walking around.
Starting point is 00:31:26 Give him a whack. That was a rolling stop! Bam! Yeah. Sorry, that was a rolling stop! Bam! We miss Andrew when he's not here. We do. Who knows what he's doing?
Starting point is 00:31:39 He didn't actually tell us. Didn't thin. He might have. I I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to not here on. I don't remember a lot of things. A lot of stuff goes in that chat. Central driving test organization CBR has had to cut short three tests in insured on Thursday because of the safety of the instructors and the candidates could not be guaranteed. So the instructors and candidates, they're all, they're all the risk. They're in the danger zone.
Starting point is 00:32:10 Yeah. The cars were followed and filmed by a former driving instructor with a grudge against the CVR going back for years. Yeah. Right up on their tail, honking at him. Fuck you. You suck. You suck at driving. You're shocked. You're going to fail. Right up on their tail, honking at him, fuck you, fuck you! You suck at driving. In the gate! You're gonna fail! The test organization discriminates against small driving schools he claims.
Starting point is 00:32:39 So that's this man's grievance. Oh, okay. This has the energy of like, you know that the famous photo of the guy standing on the roof of the building with the government needs to read by snow crab proposal? Yes. Similar sort of level of grievance to me. He also said his business was deregistered by the CBR because of a personal conflict with Director Alexander Pecktold. Quote, not a quote. The incidents took place on the same day the man had to appear in front of a judge for trespassing on CBR premises in 2022. Okay.
Starting point is 00:33:11 Yeah, so he's read to be. I'm starting to think you might be the problem. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, this guy's sort of... Yeah, maybe. Yeah, maybe not acting appropriately for someone in society. Yeah, yeah, maybe. Last year, the court told the man to stop his intimidation of CBR instructors or pay a fine
Starting point is 00:33:32 of 100,000 euro for every infringement. Oh my goodness. However, in October 2023, tests an insuter had to be stopped for three days in a row because of the man's actions, which included following... 2.34 PM coming back for more driver harassment. He's got a little money counter going up in the corner. 500,000 euro. Oh, well, in for a penny, in for 500,000 euro.
Starting point is 00:33:59 He also shares private data of CBR employees online. So he's like, why is them. Yeah. Why is his grievance with this school in particular? Sounds like his grievances with the system right? Yeah well no I think this is... His school was deregistered? I think this is central driving test organization CBI. I don't know if it's like a government-diving test organization. Yeah, and he's is like an independent one that got shut down, okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, why is like, their. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why. Why, their. Why, their. Why, their. Why, their. Why, their. Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why, their. Why, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their. Why's, their. Why, is, their. Why, is, is, their. Why, their. Why, their. Why? Why? government driving test organization. It's like an independent one that got shut down. Okay. Yeah, because the discrimination. Yeah, anyway, here's where they live. Yeah. The man told the judge, he would continue his actions despite the finds. Yeah. The man told the judge
Starting point is 00:34:39 he would continue his actions despite the finds, quote, because he was skinned to any way. So he's up to like a million bucks in penalties like you can't find me I don't have money anyway yeah like what you gotta do you can't put me in jail I think it's probably probably yeah they probably should have started I don't know we're not pro prison here but just for this guy in particular. This one guy, maybe this one guy. Put him in a dike. A what?
Starting point is 00:35:11 A canal. Yeah, a canal. Yeah. But I mean like a nice prison. Like one of those, like one of those. Have they got like fancy, if they got nice prison? They probably got their prisons. Yeah. Put in one of those, but just don't let him sort of follow your driving instructors around. You know what, just have him tailed by a knife missile.
Starting point is 00:35:30 Yeah. Do the E&M Banks culture style form of policing where he's free to do whatever he wants, but if he does start harassing... There's the knife missile. There's the, yeah, the knife missile just kind of, oh, remember I'm here. Maybe just stop him from being in cars. Yeah. The way when he wants to harass people, they're only like, he's shouting him from the side of the road and, uh, wouldn't this have just like lost you your driver's license just from like the regular driving system? Yeah, sure, you're not allowed to drive to drive the road, so you probably like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, to. So, the the the the the the the the. And, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the the the the the the to. not allowed to drive at all, right? Because you've been like harassing people the roads who probably like racked up a bunch of points and fines? You should cut off his hands. Yes. Yes. Probably his feet, just to be, just to be... Yeah. Petal. Got it. Yeah. What if it turns out that he was right and the system is really fucking a moment? thrown tho-in' taking pot shots from the from the side? Yeah. We're saying, hey, isn't it funny that
Starting point is 00:36:29 that happened? Yeah. We're just laughing it up. We're just laughing it up at Budwea. Regular. Classic. Super funny. Do you guys read the story about Norma McDonald's? Like this guy's like, yeah I was on Norm McDonald's show whatever. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's is is. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. Is. It is. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's just just just just just just th. It's like, th. It's just just just just like, th. It's like, th. It's just just just just th. It's like, th. It's like, ththis guy's like, yeah, I was on Norma McDonald's show, whatever, before we started, he's like, hey, you want to see something cool? And then he proceeded to show me the video of Bondwire. Oh my God. He did see that. Did he see that. Just, I just imagine him doing the like, you're like watching them to see see if they think it's funny is funny yeah hold it's the best beard
Starting point is 00:37:07 right you're coming up you come up to like the moment yeah yeah you think he's pulling his lunch out yeah if that's not a sandwich pal uh CBI director Peck told commented that quote the limit had been reached quote this has been going on for two and a half years now and this cost us over a million this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this this is this is this is a million this is a million this is a million this is a million this is a best best best best best best best best best best this is a best best best best best best best best best best best best best best best best best best best best best best this is this is this is a this is a this is a this is a this is a this is a this is a the best the best the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the best is a the best is a th is a th is a th is a th is th is a thus thus thus the best best best best this is the best best best this is the best best the best the best the best the best the best th quote the limit had been reached quote this has been going on for two and a half years now and it has cost us over a million we can't explain this to society he told broadcast anyways that's true how do you explain this to society yeah yeah how do you explain I won't leave us alone he's sort of like an Anton Sugar type figure really yeah outside of societal norms and understanding.
Starting point is 00:37:47 He doesn't fit in your moral universe at all, yeah. Pektylton, I want to discuss the matter with, Intuitive Mayor Ruliffe Blaker to come to a solution. After the police intervention, the three tests were rescheduled for Friday, the CBI spokesman told the broadcaster. I don't think that's going to solve the problem. He's just going to show up on Friday. Yeah, and like he appears to have some intel because he's posting everyone's personal details so he could probably figure out when the driving tests are. Imagine Dutch Anton Schagern every time he kills the cattle gun. They're like, that's 100,000 euros. I don't care. Is this how the judicial system works in the Netherlands?
Starting point is 00:38:32 Would you stand still? You just cheap racking up the amount of money you can never ever pay. What are you up to? 25 million? How much money do you have? 25 bucks. I think if you were like the teen doing the driving test where the crazy man was tal to to to to to to to to to the the the tha the tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha thi thi thi thi the. I the. I tho thi, I the. I tho. I tho. I tho. I don't th tho tho tho tho tho. I don't thia. I don't thia. I don't thi. I don't thi. I thi. I tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha that's th were like the teen doing the driving test where the crazy man was taligating you and honking at you and hurling abuse out the window, you should just get your license.
Starting point is 00:38:53 You should just get a pass, yeah. Like don't make them be like, oh you'll actually have to come back next week. Yeah. And also there's a fair chance that guy will be there again. Yeah. Hey, if you can't do anything about it, you get your license. And like, you know what teens are like? You know when you take your test for your peas? And you're like, oh, we're going on a little road trip the moment I finish this test, because I know I'm getting it. So you've made some plans. And now your plans are devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated devastated. Crazy civil servant. You should cut his hands off. You cut his fucking hands off.
Starting point is 00:39:25 Look what he did to you. The Netherlands. That is a source of news that we come back to again and again. And sometimes we return to other things, like a story from the bonus episode from this week. It's time for an update on another story, watch. Now, as I said, this is a follow-up to something that we spoke about on a bonus episode, so you might not have heard it. So I will... If you haven't heard it, you're basically just going to feel stupid for the next 15 minutes or so. And you will think, boy, I wish I was subscribed to the patron it, so I will. If you haven't heard it, you're basically just going to feel stupid for the next 15 minutes or so.
Starting point is 00:40:05 And you will think, boy, I wish I was subscribed to the Patreon so I could listen to bonus episodes. We talked about, uh, we read out a story in tabloid phenomenon that was 300 words about a 13 second tic-toc 13-second Tick-Tock of a relatively handsome guy and getting a hair cut and then looking more handsome. Getting cheeseled added. Yeah. And um, there was just a funny article, but then I looked into this a little bit more and I found out something kind of disturbing. Sorry, that was the bonus episode. So, that was a twist on everything that we understood about the story in the first place? We'll be forced to re-examine everything that we that we that we th th th th that we th th th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the the the the th-a th-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-it the. thir thirty theat theat theat theat the. Get the. Get the. Get the. Get the. Get the. Get the. Get the. Get th. Get th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. thir-a-a-a-t. thirteattf. thirteattf. thirteattf. thirteattfeattfeattfeateattfe. the. the was the bonus episode. So, that was the bonus episode on everything that we understood about the story in the first place? We'll be forced to re-examine everything that we thought we knew about it, yeah. Man, I'd hate to view this story through a new and twisted lens.
Starting point is 00:40:54 Yeah. Boy, now you're going to have to actually have a pair of lenses. This is going to Spencer Turkish barber by the way if you want to look that up once you've finished subscribing. I also do all my best intro is over on the bonus episodes. That is true I think because you have more time during a workday to come up with the intro. Yeah it's probably true. The most important thing that I learned is that the guy, Jimmy the hairdresser, he's Australian, he's in Adelaide. So this is just the tablet. I noticed that we were chatting about, he's in Adelaide.
Starting point is 00:41:33 He's in Adelaide, so that certainly covers a little bit. Well, but also the concept of Turkish fuckboy hairdresser, it's universal. Yes. Yeah, that's every. That has no borders. Yes. Um, so one of the things that the story really focused on was that in the first half of the video The guy getting his hair cut was wearing these really ugly glasses and he looked really like sad and awkward And then in the second half he wasn't wearing glasses and he looked really happy and sexy and confident now Now I've just posted a link in our discord there if you guys want to watch that video. So this is sort of a compilation of like Ugo rescues that this guy's done. He's taken a certified nerdlinger Uggo and then he's turned him into a straight up hottie. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:18 Now I bet we're going to see something in this that's common. Yeah, there's a sort of a common element between all of these rescues. Do you think you can see what it is Lucy? Interesting. No, I have no pattern recognition. Is it they have glasses on? Is it they all have the exact single one same pair of glasses? They're the same set of glasses? They're the same fucking glasses? This guy picked up a pair of the same glasses. They're the same glasses. They're the same fucking glasses. This guy picked up a pair of the ugliest glasses he possibly could. And I want you to sort of notice something else about maybe their body language and their facial expressions. Yeah. They're all deliberately ugly.
Starting point is 00:43:01 They're making nerd faces. They're like mugging for the camera of being like, oh, I'm such a bad. What am I even doing here? I usually get my hair cut by my mom. Yeah. 100% he's making these people. And he's caught in the moment that we were talking about last time when Andrew was here of like when you put the smoke on at the hairdresser, the water in your head. Comed down your fringe. Cimed-upon, in, in, the the the th, th, th, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th, I th, I th, I th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm thage, I'm thage, I'm th, I'm the, the, the, the, the, the, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, look, their their their their their, their they-a, that, they-a'-s-uh, thu, thu, their-uh, their-uh, what th hairdresser, the water in your head. Comed down your fringe with wet, down fringe, smoke on, you've never looked out there in your life. Yeah. He's turned them into nerdling of ferrets and then this. And then he's shaved them to be beautiful, sexy ferrets. I think some of these guys who may be like they've been models the whole time. their their their their their their their. their their, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their, their, their their, their their their their their their the whole time. Yeah. I think these are semi-professional models
Starting point is 00:43:46 that this guy has sort of pre-nered. He's nerded them for the contrast. And then he's turned them into hotties. It's a valuable lesson, you know? And also he's fixed their vision. Yeah, well, that's true. And that's what all the comments now and all their their thia, thia, thia, thia, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi.. thi. thi. thi. thi. thii. thiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, true. And that's what all the comments now and all the videos are like, wow, he's an optometrist or whatever. He's a Turkish Jesus. This guy's, I want that might.
Starting point is 00:44:11 The Turkish part is conjecture on our part, by the way. I don't think this guy actually is taking. I don't think he's Turkish. I have been led to that. Well, just because we repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly we repeatedly repeatedly repeatedly we repeatedly repeatedly we like 20 times in that episode. We don't know. He's... You can have Indian buffers doing spiritually the same thing. I think you understand what we say... And Indian barber and a Turkish barber are spiritually the same venue. Yes. Yeah. I think men's the barbers sort of do something that is spiritually a Turkish fade to everyone. And the culture inside very Turkish. One cut. There's like 80 guys in there's no appointment. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. their. th. th. th. their. th. their. th. their. th. their. their. their. th. th. th. their. their. their their. their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the th. I the th. I te. I te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. the the the they. the the the the the the the the the the the th. very Turkish. One cut, you get one cut. There's like 80 guys in there. There's no appointment system. No appointments, no Armenians.
Starting point is 00:44:48 Yeah. Jesus Christ, the two rules on the door. Anyway, this guy's running a fucking scam. If you've got a lot of time to waste, check out the Instagram of Jimmy, the hairdresser, because like, it's those really horribly staged nerd saving videos and then him doing a bunch of the pointing style tc-talks. Imagine if you went in there and Jimmy didn't post your cut like he didn't post your fade. Because like you didn't have a guy are you gonna take an after you're
Starting point is 00:45:17 gonna take an after? Yeah I've stopped doing the nerd face and I guess I'll take my glasses off on no no no we don't have to do. We're you you you you you you you you you you they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they they're they they're they're they they're they're they're they're they're to they're to they're they're they're to to to to to to to to to to to to to to they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they they they they're they they they they they're they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to to to to to to to they're to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to they're they're they're they're they're and I guess I'll take my glasses off. On! No! No! We don't have to do. We're really busy. So you should probably just go. Don't come back. I need a guy I can save.
Starting point is 00:45:34 No photos. No social media. Andrew's trying to weigh in on the episode. He hasn't noticed the pattern. Yeah, he hasn't noticed, he hasn't noticed the pattern. Yeah, he hasn't. See, that's, for me it was like the end of that movie where he noticed all the stuff. Yes. He's looking around the room and he's like, oh,
Starting point is 00:45:53 Kaiser Soze. You know, what the, usual suspects. It was like a usual suspects. Have I told you the story about, like my friend and I had the DVD of the usual suspects and his brother walks in and he sees that so on the cover it's the it's got all the mug shots of all the or they're doing a lineup in the photo on the suspect and there's Kevin Spacey kind of looking all like you know doing the yeah. The suspects. And there's Kevin Spacey kind of looking all like, you know, doing the, yeah. Uh, kind of pose that he does for him.
Starting point is 00:46:30 And yeah, my friend's brother walks in and goes, it's that guy. Hadn't seen the movie. Straightaway. And I was so frustrated because I was like, yeah, but like there's so much like, it's just such a good like, blah, blah, blah, but he was right. He was right. He had that, that little bit of media literacy above us to understand, actually, it's that guy. It's that guy that's a stupid twist. It's kind of just clawing and like. That movie, there's no point in watching it if you know what the twist is. Oh, is it no good otherwise?
Starting point is 00:47:11 At all. I don't think the movie is entertaining on its own, entertaining enough in its own right to be like, that I would go back and watch it. I think it's the payoff is the only thing about it that matters. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's the the the the the the the that that that that that I I I I I I I that that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I would I that I would I would that I would that I would that I would I that that that I would that I would that I would that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I would that I would that I would that I would that I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I would I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I that I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I that I would that I would that I thing about it that matters. Yeah. And it was like, oh, it was that guy. It was that guy. This person's a genius. Yeah. Hey, the usual suspects, the plot of that movie is mostly about crime.
Starting point is 00:47:34 It's time for Crime Watch. Please put down your weapon. You're a direct one. Pull a board! You now have five seconds. You're a direct violation of team of 113 section 9. You now have five seconds to fly. Help me! Help me!
Starting point is 00:47:52 I'm not all the radio to do this course! In retrospect, this is actually probably a model of an America watch, I think. This is from WAN-E, the Wayne, in Fort Wayne, Indiana. Fort Wayne, man, woman, accused of using fake names, checks to steal vehicles. This is territory that we've covered before. A Fort Wayne man and woman are both facing felony theft charges after reportedly using fake checks and false names to steal expensive cars according to Alan Superior Court documents. It rules that they can still do checks over there and like hey here's a check for four million dollars. Yeah it's signed the
Starting point is 00:49:04 the paper in the pen. Yeah, it's signed. The guy signed it. This little piece of paper. In the pen. You wrote it in pen on there. It's signed by me, Dr. Michael Pancreous. Also, this is a good time to do a little PSA report as well. No, sorry, PSA per segment. Um, July 15th, I believe, Target in the U.S.
Starting point is 00:49:29 That is the final date on which they will accept personal checks. Oh, wow, they're getting rid of it. They're get rid of, yeah, personal checks are gone, so you can't. Loopole closed. Buy a bunch of stuff and be like, uh, what was that? $13.27. Yeah. Let me let let let let th. Let let th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. P. th. P. P. P. Uh, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. Uh, th. th. th. th. the. th. th. the. th. th. th. the. th. th. the the the the the the the th. that, $13.27? Yeah. Let me just write that down on my little piece of paper that I'll hand you. Am I bet? Yeah, I'm good for it.
Starting point is 00:49:51 Hey, cash this for me. Jeffrey Rogan, 34, and Amanda Matine each face a level 5 felony. And Mantine also faces one count of counterfeiting, which is a level 6 felony. According to court documents, Rogan reportedly used fraudulent pro-fed credit union checks to purchase a 2017 Cadillac and a 2023 Chevrolet Corvette in North Carolina and Michigan, respectively, for a combined total of $156,000. So good.
Starting point is 00:50:23 You just written bought a Chevy Corvette with a fake check. Like I like this. Cool crime. That's a great crime. How much did you say it was? I have that much. Yeah. It'll be in your bank account in three days. I'll put an extra five grand on there for you. Yeah, why not? Hey, a little bit extra just for you. You've been so good to me. Thank you for convincing me to get the clearcoat. Yeah. Hey, how far do you guys reckon a Chevy Corvette can drive in three days? Matine is then accused of visiting multiple B.MV. B.M.V. M.V. B. M.V. V. M. V. V. M. V. M. B. B. M. B. V. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. B. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. than than than th. th. th. th. th. th for th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. than than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. than. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to get a new title for the Corvette. So the BMV. Is it like the DMV? Yeah, that's the Bureau of Motor Vehicles, not the Department of Motor Vehicles.
Starting point is 00:51:11 Indiana has a BMV. Now that's just silly. So does someone else. There's like two or three states in America that have a, um, Inglorious bastards in the basement sort of thing? Where someone's pretending they're from Indiana and they're like, oh, I went to the DMV the other day and a shocked silence comes over the room. Yes, that's the perfect test. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:37 Where did you say you went? The BMV. Get him! He's no, he's no hoser. Grrrh! M'ean reportedly used fake documentation to secure a title for the Corvette just a few hours before Michigan police were able to list the vehicle as stolen. Dope. It's cute that she was going to get paperwork for it. I mean, she did.
Starting point is 00:52:12 Yeah. Like she did it. She got it. Straight to the dealership. Get away from the dealership as fast as possible. Go to the BMV. And you know you got a wait in line at the BMV. Hate going to the BMV.
Starting point is 00:52:27 Managed to get like the car registered in her name, the stolen car she bought with bad checks and get out of there. This is honestly amazing. It's great. Impressive. And the only hole in her plan was the fact that it was fake money and fake paperwork and and just like hey there's the stolen car. She should have got a few more states over I think. Oh wait no they've not been arrested. Oh they're on the lamb? They're on the lamb. With the Chevy Corvette? Yeah. Well they're Thelma and Loui the Covet. With a Cadillac and a Corvette. So I guess they got a car each? So they're Thelma and Louizing in separate cars?
Starting point is 00:53:08 It's separate cars. This is like when couples end up with like separate bedrooms after they've been together for a really long time? Yeah, it's like, oh yeah, we'll do just want to have different things and you don't really like going to the same restaurants as me? You know what you like. I like to be all the time? I'll be stopping constantly for my peas.
Starting point is 00:53:30 We should have gotten the ones with dual climate control, but I like it a little warmer in my car. So I'll get my own car. I'll get my own car. I'll go take a to the bad, I'll get my their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their to their their their their their their their their their. I'll go. I'll. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll go. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll their. I'll the the the the the the the the the tap. I'll the the tap. I'll get. I'll get. I'll get. I'll get. I'll get. I'll get. I'll get the the the the the the the the the the a, well, I don't know, like a Cadillac. Yeah. I might go to Ohio ride that banshee. Yeah. No, you don't like roller coasters. Although only two specific vehicles were listed as being tied to Rogan, roughly 10 high-end vehicles have been purchased in various parts of the country using fake Pro-Fed checks, totaling more than $600,000 as of May 20th according to court documents.
Starting point is 00:54:09 Are they saying that it's this guy? Like are they imply this man's been on a bad check spree? Or other people have figured out that it takes a couple hours for them to run the checks? And they're just like, you know what, we can just take the car. It is wild to me that they give them the car before the check has been run. Yeah, I'm just gonna say that. You just hand them a piece of paper that says I'm good for it. Yeah. Like when we bought, we don't usually get it from the dealership because, um, because dealerships are
Starting point is 00:54:39 complete scams run by the worst people on earth, but you know we're looking for our car for ages. So when we got our new used car, we got in there on a Sunday and we're like, yeah, you know, this all seems, you know, straight down the line, fantastic, can we have it? And they said no. Yeah, we'll send you the money and they say, yeah, come back on like Wednesday. Yeah, see, that seems like a pretty decent system. th. th. th. th. th. th. the their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their their their their their their their their their their their th. their th. their their their their'll send you the money and they say, yeah, come back on like Wednesday. Yeah, see, that seems like a pretty decent system. That seems reasonable, yeah. Yeah, no, I, it's like when you keep your shoes on after you've bought them at the
Starting point is 00:55:14 shoe store. Yeah. You want to walk out of there in that car. Yes, you do. Yeah. Yeah. Extremely Flint's, by the way. I guess that's true. Surveillance video also reportedly showed Rogan and Mantine together at the BMV branch. I can't, BMV just sound so wrong. It's not right. Yeah. Sounding bad on the tongue. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:39 It sounds like you've got one specific hammer strike in the head. Oh, down to the BMV? That's going th going th, it's th, it's th, it's th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, th, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th. S so th. Sa, th. Sa, th. Sa, th. Sa, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. Sa, th. So, tho, tha, tho, tha. Sa. So, tha. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. So, tha. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa. Sa, surveillance. that's the head. Oh, down to the BMV? It's got to go down to the BMV. What? Don't worry about him. Don't worry about it. Don't mention the B&B thing. Hammerstrike. Savantin's video also reportedly showed
Starting point is 00:55:56 Rogan and Matine together court documents related to Matine's charges do not mention the 2017 catalog that was reportedly sold. You know, just because you are in a relationship together doesn't mean you have to do everything together. No. Yeah. What if we started to do more things apart? Yes. And that way, when we come back together we'll have so so much more to talk about because I'll miss you more, you know. Yes. I love you, but I don't miss you right now because we're around each other all the time. I want us to generate our own shared experiences.
Starting point is 00:56:35 I'm going to go steal a 2017 Cadillac using the methods you taught me, which I'm so grateful. You go out there and you get out the tha out out out out out out out out out out their to their to get to get to get their to get to get to to to to their then we'll meet in the middle and I'll tell you how mine went. You tell me how yours went. There'll be plenty of time to talk at the BMV. We'll be in line for ages of the the tmv's. Our paperwork done. Everyone's always cranky in there as well. I'm always rude to you. Both suspects have active warrants issued as of Tuesday night. So they're still out there. Yeah. Cruising the highways. Yeah, they're wanted and extremely cool. Yes. Dangerous, sexy.
Starting point is 00:57:10 Maybe almost single. Basically single. Open, maybe. Open to new experiences as individuals, but for the right person. One thought out the door. Open to a new experience together, maybe. That might be the sparking the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to a new experience together maybe that might be the spark that keeps him going maybe you meet a young hottie on the road you both meet Vanessa yes Bonnie and Clyde I think really find her interesting
Starting point is 00:57:35 seeking Thelma in the leash she's so confident you know drinking beer throwing darts masculine and yet feminine at the same time. Yeah. At first you were kind of mad because she like was putting her hand sort of almost possessively on Josh on Jeffrey's leg. But then like 30 seconds later she's coming around to the other side and she's sort of done that to you as well and you've felt a thrill there and you go, wait a second. Yeah and flannel that looks looks looks looks looks looks looks looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks that looks the you've felt a thrill there and you go wait it. Hold on a second. Man, Flanolette looks really good on her. And then you wake up in the morning and both cars are gone.
Starting point is 00:58:10 Yeah. Which means that she probably had an accomplice or she managed to do it in two trips without you noticed. She's good. Her name probably wasn't even Vanessa. How deep does this rabbit hole go? This is definitely an episode of the podcast. Buntavisa. Hey, thank you so much for joining us.
Starting point is 00:58:30 If this was your first episode, you made it to the end. This is kind of what it is all the time. There's usually another guy. Yeah. Sort of a kind of the dad of the podcast in a way. Yeah. Like th th th th th thia way. Yeah. Like two of you are dads, but he's kind of figuratively. Yeah, sometimes, a family doesn't have a dad.
Starting point is 00:58:50 Yeah, sometimes. That's okay. He's messaging us, but I don't know what he's doing. He's trying to ask me questions while we're in the middle of recording. I don't know what's going on. He's trying to be the man left. Hey, tap out, Johnny Chime in. You don't want to be a part of this, so let us do it without you. We will maybe see you on the bonus episode.
Starting point is 00:59:12 I would definitely recommend subscribe and just go back to listen to that last bonus episode. Because I don't want to toot our own horns, but that was a blast. It was a little gross, so you kind of got to be prepared for that. And I wish I could tell you why it was gross, but really you want the surprise to happen to you in the first 30 seconds of the podcast. It's revealed immediately, but yeah, I still want it to be a surprise for you. Just spend one, say you're going to spend the five US dollars on that just once. You know, you. their. their. th. th. Say. Say. Say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, to, to, to, to, to, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th thi. thi. thi. thi. their, their, their, to spend the five US dollars on that just once. You know, you're not committing. Yes. And then sort of forget that you put it on like a recurring payment on Patreon.
Starting point is 00:59:50 Never think about it again. Just don't really think about it again. Yeah. Until you're overdrawn one weekend. You're like what the fuck is what the fuck is Buntavista? Just yeah, so keep that going for as long as possible. Otherwise stay safe out there. the the the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? What the fuck? the fuck? the fuck? th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. you. th. th. you. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the the the tho the the the tho the you. you. the you. you. you long as possible. Otherwise, stay safe out there. Keep your head on a fucking swill for Vanessa. Yeah. But, you know, it's not like they were your cars in the first place. Exactly. A beautiful trist with an engaging, tomboyish bisexual lady. Nothing to lose.
Starting point is 01:00:21 With literally nothing to lose because they weren't your cars. You know what? The cops coming coming after her now. Yeah, that's Vanessa's problem. They're looking for those cars. Yeah, she's the one driving two cars at the same time with those plates. And I'm looking, you're looking for Vanessa too. Because some of that must have been real, it kind of all been an act, right? It wasn't all fake. something. Goodbye. Bye.

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