BudPod with Phil Wang & Pierre Novellie - Episode 256 - The Unknown
Episode Date: March 6, 2024The lads finally discuss Willy's Chocolate Experience, AI in general, time zones, Rob gets in touch about some insane stickers he saw on a car and the lads debate the significance of the gay rainbow p...aw, Sweet Pete sends us some wine cans with awful labellingCome see Pierre at Soho Theatre in London from March 26th!https://sohotheatre.com/events/pierre-novellie-why-are-you-laughing/ Get bonus BudPod on Patreon! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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it's bad pod 256 256 you like this you like this don't you if you're still listening to us
on episode 256 then you like you like this that's something a bit sexy about that and
maybe not in a good way how can anything be sexy in a bad way like uh possible yeah i think so i mean sexy in the
sense of like intent or notionally as opposed to by definition appealing okay okay not sexy
in quality sexy and intent i see i see intent and in and in presumption
ah yes that can be unpleasant i understand yeah like someone dancing around going oh you like this
like there's a bit of there's a bit of that to it
well i like being on holiday pierre we're recording this a little early yeah because i when this comes out I will be in in the Canary Islands
and you've never been
with my gluten free
with my
people started calling
the girlfriends gluten frees
according to the last five minutes of my life
they have
I'm off with my gluten free to the Canary Islands
never been to the Canary Islands before.
They're Spanish-populated African islands.
Well, Spanish-speaking African islands populated by drunk Brits.
Yeah, and some Germans, I think.
Okay.
I think the Germans and the Brits compete for who can go to Spain and drink the most.
Woof.
Yeah.
That's a losing battle, Germans.
Yeah, I would think so, but...
I don't think the Germans have counted on just how much the British hate themselves and their lives.
Well, just need to be hot.
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm speaking on the alcohol front specifically.
Oh, no, yeah, totally.
But, like, they like that at home as well, yeah.
It's true.
I am looking forward to traveling to a very different climate
but staying in the same time zone.
This is not something a British person gets to do very much
because there is essentially nothing directly south of us.
Yes, that's true.
South Africa is only one hour different.
That's right. That's weird. Yeah. yeah canary islands i think it's the same or maybe it's one hour yeah is there is there that
weird dotted line does it come across out into the sea after spain and then encompass the canary
islands yes i think it does do that there's an annoying thing about time zones so they haven't
done it with lines they've done it on vibe.
Yeah, exactly.
Because there's no reason for Paris not to be in the same time zone.
It's true.
Are we...
Ireland is same as us.
Yeah.
So are the British Isles the only place with GMT-0?
Ooh, in Europe.
Yeah. Iceland must in Europe? Yeah.
Iceland must be the same as us.
Iceland?
Surely.
Surely.
Iceland time zone.
You are right!
Since 1968,
Iceland has been in the Greenwich Mean time zone.
The Beatles did it.
What?
That was the Beatles. We just feel like you should be in the same time zone as us
Doesn't make sense for you to
Then they went, for the Beatles
for your ringo, we will change
all the clocks
Okay, so I'm going
I'm going to
type countries
in the GMT time zone.
Just bring up a map, mate.
An hour...
Sorry?
Just Google Images maps, no?
No, I'm going to do it this way.
So our bet is the UK, the Republic of Ireland, and Iceland.
Yeah.
Three countries in GMT.
Do we have any more guesses?
Western Sahara.
Any more?
I don't know if it's officially a country, but...
Western Sahara.
Sierra Leone?
Is that as far west?
Yeah, that's a good one.
Gambia.
Okay.
I'm... I feel like they'd stay at one.
I feel like they'd stay plus one just for convenience.
That's true.
So my bet is UK, Ireland, Iceland.
Azores.
Azores?
Okay, so Pierre's out there with Azores.
Here we go.
Countries in the GMT time zone.
What?
You're kidding.
What?
Is it just swear words?
It says don't ever fucking search this again.
And then it's just a picture of a gun.
A picture of a gun.
What the hell?
Okay.
Well, what is it?
What? Okay, okay.
Phil, we're on tenterhooks here.
What?
Yeah, I'm trying to figure out.
Keep saying the word what.
Greenwich mean...
Well...
Plus one in time.
Okay, so...
Yes, yes, yes.
Greenwich mean time is defined in the law as standard time for...
Oh, it's just quite a...
I think the Google images
would have been better
Greenwich Mean Time is used as standard time all year round
in the following countries
Burkina Faso
The Gambia, Ghana
Guinea, Guinea Bissau
Iceland, Ivory Coast
Liberia, Mali, Mauritiana
Mali
Sahrawi Arab
Democratic Republic in brackets
disputed. Western Sahara. It sounds like
Is that Western Sahara? Ah, I see.
I think it is.
Wow, are there anything with
Democratic Republic in the name has anything
disputed about it? Doesn't sound right.
Saint Helena,
Ascension and Tristan de
Cunha Senegal
Sierra Leone, Togo
So there are actually fucking loads
I was right
Sahrawi, that's Western Sahara
Is the disputed territory, yes
Yes
Wow
Thank you
Thank you Model UN
But also Canary Islands,
Faroe Islands, Portugal.
Portugal.
Ireland, UK.
Portugal makes sense.
Okay.
It's loads. Fair enough.
Yeah.
So that would be an interesting travel show.
A man who refuses to deal with jet lag.
That's fun.
You're in Western Africa for a lot of that show.
Yeah.
And why not?
And then Iceland.
A real vibe shift.
A real vibe shift to go from Ghana to Iceland.
I wonder if that's a journey many people have made.
From Ghana to Iceland.
From Ghana to Iceland a a what story a
uh hmm there's got to be a pun there something to do with herring and gold
the ghost of socialism is haunting ghana to iceland from ghana to iceland that is a ghost
haunting people go gh Ghana to Iceland?
That's a good way to ruin a speech.
If you're a politician and you use slightly odd examples,
it's going to be so distracting.
People are going to be too busy going,
wait, did he say Ghana and Iceland?
And they're not going to be listening to the next 10 things you say.
Yeah. Phil. We shall fight next 10 things you say. Yeah.
Phil.
We shall fight them in the marshes.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
We shall fight them on the dales.
Did he say bayou?
We shall fight them in some clearings.
We shall fight them in the bayou.
Do we have bayou?
Huh?
I don't think we have bayous. Do we have bayou huh I don't think we have bayous do we have bayous and then someone goes well actually
technically some of the salt marshes
yeah the ph
levels of some of
the soil you go yeah but still it doesn't feel
like the right word feels like you should have not done that
sorry what was he saying
now Phil
Phil
yeah
I've come we're recording early because you're going to
the canarias and so i have i have very recently i've just come from doing my other audio talky
job which is the frank skinner radio show yes on absolute radio um absolute and we were absolutely On Absolute Radio. Absolute.
Absolutely cheating on this podcast.
That's what Pierre's doing.
That's right.
We were discussing something that we should discuss.
It would be remiss of us to ignore this.
It's the Willy Wonka Glasgow.
Of course, yes.
The online sensation.
The hit. Scotland's Fire Festival,
the Glasgow Willy Wonka experience.
So fun, so funny.
To be clear, it's... For people who don't know,
for people who are somehow under a digital rock, Pierre,
how would you describe this story?
Shall I describe it?
I'll describe it like it's a story as if i was
one of the customers like okay like as if like the way it was so you're gonna role play yeah yeah in
real life yeah um all right that's that's good there's uh one of those immersive experiences
some london-based companies come up to glasgow and they're doing like it's like Willy Wonka they don't say Wonka because obviously
they'll get sued but yeah looks good it's in a warehouse and you get your
kids get the Wiens around there and the website looks quite good it's all
chocolate and that and they'll be like you know free sweets and that and so
like people were like oh this sweets and that and so like people
were like oh this would be good and it was willie's chocolate experience is what it was called
for copyright reasons um and it was willie mcduff the chocolatier and his oopsie doodles
um and the whole thing it turned out was just generated by ai and put on by this lunatic who
just thought that an ai generated script and an ai generated website would be enough and then the parents paid 35
quid a ticket which is a lot that's a lot and they showed up and it was a sort of warehouse with like
some some sort of like candyland props and uh sort of a single banner and a table with plastic cups of lemonade on
and every kid got one jelly bean
it's the kind of place
a
terrorist suspect would get renditioned
it's the kind of place
you'd have in
Saw
someone would be tortured in Saw, it's just like
cold empty concrete and then one one
table with plastic cups of lemonade looking like urine samples set out uh that's what the table of
lemonade looked like it just looked like urine samples collected at the olympic village or
something yeah what i liked about the table of lemonade and then just a sparse smattering of
candy themed sculptures on an otherwise completely undecorated floor and on the walls were just
printouts of candy lands hung sagging onto bare concrete walls it um yeah what I liked about
the lemonade display
was it was
a raw
trestle table
yeah
just an unfolded
trestle table
and
they'd kind of arranged
the half cups of lemonade
which were in plastic
office
water machine
cups
but
oh the place was
it was badly decorated
for an AA meeting
yeah yeah yeah if I walked into an a.a meeting
it looked like that i said come on guys put in some effort i know we're all alcoholics but we
need cheering up this is not helping um but on the table of lemonade phil they had the lemonade kind
of laid out but they hadn't removed just like the cardboard box the cups came in and just like bits
of packaging were just on the table as well
it wasn't even as nicely laid out as you would do it if that was all you had to do and there was no
suggestion of magic at all um and they got at the last minute a poor some poor bunch of fucking
actors with like a day's notice yeah who i'm sure will get paid on time and in full
on time and in full um and they just had to like try and learn this ai script and also because it's an ai script and it's just willie mcduff and this whole made-up shit um it had a villain
there was a villain uh in the script and that was the unknown yeah at the unknown which isn't
who's an evil chocolate maker chocolate maker that lives in the walls.
A harrowing idea.
How does he make chocolate from in a wall?
It's so stupid.
The robots did a bad job on this.
And yeah, the clip that's gone viral.
Well, it's all gone viral,
but the clip of The Unknown is the actors playing
Willie McDuff saying, The Unknown and The Unknown peers from behind a mirror. the clip of the unknown is the the the actors playing willie mcduff saying the unknown and
the unknown peers from behind the mirror and that's you just hear scottish children
slowly cotton on that something's not right and they go no you hear them begin to cry as he as the unknown wearing a chrome like squid game mask kind of yeah like like jerkily moves
behind for some reason a mirror that's in a corner of a warehouse
and uh and the fake willy wonka is doing his best to be to be engaged with the script and oh man what it's it's
a wonderful story that's brought the entire country together there's nothing funnier to anyone i think
than a theatrical disaster it's funny a bad play it is funny it is funny um already people are
talking halloween costumes they're talking theories. There's a theory that the unknown is Kate Middleton,
who's been missing from public duties for two months now.
I didn't realize that she had gone.
Yeah, well, I mean, people who are more attentive of the royals than you and I,
which is a lot of people, it turns out,
have noted that Kate Middleton has not been seen in public for about two months now, I think.
Yeah, which is a
Michael Jackson length of time.
Yeah, well, they've said
that the palace has
said that she's gone in for
abdominal surgery,
but has had
to cancel
engagements that have
been in the diary and
surely they would have known about.
This is Conspiracy Mill turning,
churning, and the most fun conspiracy
is that she is playing the unknown
because the unknown is not
unmasked at any point. No one knows
who the unknown is. Yeah, that's true.
That's true, the unknown.
Yeah, I mean...
She's been away for two months getting into character
doing a lot of research
learning her lines
she went
method in order to play the unknown
she herself must be unknown
to the public
her location must be unknown
that's it
it's a wonderful story because it it combines
it's sort of the fire festival for the ai age yeah right this is a con that's been
made possible by ai and by ai art which was used to sell it on the web page because you look at the
ai art and all the words at the bottom that promise what children can look forward to are phrases that don't make sense.
They all hint at things like unbelievable spectrum.
Do you want to hear some of them?
Oh, yeah.
I mean, some of these letters don't even make sense.
I don't know why AI art is so bad at letters.
Yeah, signs and english and yeah it just doesn't seem to understand what they're for so the biggest the first one you see is a is a and this is a picture of like a magical landscape candy forest
well there's one that just says emagnation lab um so they promise a twilight tunnel in the
twilight tunnel journey through a dimly lit passage adorned with captivating projections
and enigmatic sounds none of which seem to exist and in the picture of the twilight tunnel is the
series of words that say the following phil so let's see if you can whisper what these are supposed to be. This is our first AI whispering.
Whoa, AI Wonka whispering.
Okay.
I mean, this will be so detached from logic,
I can't imagine I'll be able to.
This one should be easy.
Lightng.
Lightng.
Yeah, lightng.
Lightng.
Lighting effects. Yeah, lighting. Lighting, okay. Lighting Lighting
Lighting
Lighting
Dim
Tight
Dim
Tight
Yeah it just says
Dim
Tight
Diminutive
Tight
Yeah
Sorry the wonky
The wonky doodles
Oh so we don't know The answers for this No we don't We're just guessing Depractions tights worn by the cast. Sorry, the wonky doodles.
Oh, so we don't know the answers for this. No, we don't. We're just guessing.
Depractions.
Depractions.
Distractions. Yeah, and depictions.
Depressing distractions. Depressing distractions.
Yes.
I thought they did deliver on that. The robot
knew. Okay.
Vivu sounds.
Vuvuzelas. Yes. Yes.uzeilas the wonky doodles play vivuzeilas to scare away the unknown wonky doodles un ungearevel unbelievable ungearevel Unbelievable. Ungerevel. Ungerevel. Your experience at this place will be ungerevel.
That sounds like German for unbelievable.
Ungerevel.
Ungerevel.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Empretty.
Impressive.
And pretty.
Empretty.
Empretty.
Empretty.
That's quite good neologisms.
These are quite good new words.
We're back at dimdich.
It is fascinating, though, that people will talk...
Dodge-jection.
Dodge-jection.
Energetic sounds.
Spider.
And unexpected twits.
It is very Germanic. You're right. It It is very Germanic.
You're right.
It does sound very Germanic.
It's interesting that the language itself
is in an uncanny valley
between English and nothing.
Yes, and it also promises
enthrining entertainment.
It says enthrining entertainment,
catechegating, live performances,
cart chitons,
exazadre lollipops
and a passadise of sweet teats.
Okay, now I don't want to get accused here
of victim blaming,
but if I'm a parent
and I'm on the website
for the Wonka experience
and I see words like
dispracting enjubainment,
maybe I'm not going to go.
It says here that they'll be free.
Ooh, it says
chocolabe.
Free chocolabe.
Like if you were a parent looking at it
going, free chocolabe. That sounds good.
Yeah, you're telling me to say,
you promised free chocolate.
Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.
We promise free chocolabe.
Chocolabe is William McDff's word for the air so tuck in enjoy i think you'll find that we promised you free chocolate
it's such a glaswegian willy Wonka it's so on the nose
it's something that is like
a depressing warehouse
like it doesn't do Glasgow any favours
this story
but it has given joy to the rest
of the nation
to be fair it is very Glaswegian in the sense that it's
something visually quite depressing
that's actually hysterically funny
yes yeah and I think that says a lot that's actually hysterically funny.
Yes, yeah, yeah.
And I think that says a lot.
That's the spirit of the city itself.
It is like if Limmy wrote Fire Festival.
Yes, it is like a Limmy sketch.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, yeah.
Just a really sad oompa-loompa with a thick Glaswegian accent.
It is so funny.
And the guy in charge of it is
like in the clip
of parents
screaming at him
he just is such
an obvious
creepy con man
and he's
got a lot of
necklaces on
really high voice
very thin
high voice
you know what i
mean he's quite
unsettling he's
really unsettling
he's hiding behind
the bouncers he's
got this really
unsettling voice
and he's sold or at least tried to sell He's quite unsettling. He's really unsettling. He's hiding behind the bouncers. He's got this really unsettling voice.
And he's sold, or at least tried to sell,
AI-written novels on Amazon.
Yeah, just gibberish novels.
And I think this is another piece of evidence for me that I think this whole AI takeover thing is overblown.
I don't think it's happening.
Do you think AI is going to end up being
like the equivalent of Second Life or something?
Like when Second Life came out, everyone went on.
Like Bitcoin.
Yeah, yeah.
I don't know.
I think it will have practical applications.
It writes code very well, apparently.
Yes, yeah.
So like coding, learning to code now is almost pointless.
Yeah.
But I think it's threat to the arts i think is overblown because there's there's this weird presumption among people who
herald the end for the art because they are i this is weird presumption that people
watch films and tv and read books simply because they exist yeah but that's not true people people reject most of the
tv and television and movies and film books that are made because they're not good enough so the
idea that you could just have ai make what will be by definition derivative works of fiction yeah
the idea that they'll overtake truly creative works of art i think it's nonsense i
think yeah i think i maybe i you know for all my pessimisms i have more faith in the human
spirit than that i have more faith in human boredom ah this is a good way of putting it
because humans will just go yeah shit though exactly yeah sure i don't like exactly no no one the most people have ever said about a piece of
ai art is that's impressive no one's gone that's beautiful no one has ever said that's beautiful
also we've gone oh that's impressive that does kind of look like the thing yeah no one's gone
oh it's beautiful it's made me feel something new not once also like the people saying it's
impressive are people saying it's impressive
are people saying like that's amazing given that a robot's done that using other things humans made
before that's right so yeah yeah given all of these contextual clues it's impressive but um
i wonder what what's historical precedent is is the best part is a is the best analogy.
Printing press, maybe.
Like, no need to hand write every book.
Just stamp it out.
And being able to print pictures, hundreds of the same picture.
But is there anything that has taken human creativity out of a process?
Photography?
Ah, yeah. I think that's probably the best i think that is the best you have to learn to use this technology and it's
still a creative act actually it's just that it's got a bit of technology and you have to
you literally have to point it in the right direction yeah um yeah right now that's i think
that's probably the perfect analogy and again when when photography was invented people thought that was the end of painting and it wasn't when tv was invented
people thought it was the end of cinema and it wasn't yeah yeah uh yeah so i'm books even
books still around um also looking at the ai art on the website it looks like all the other ai art
i've ever seen it's sort of always a kind of slightly glowing and
lumpy and like yeah and people you know ai watches have said they can tell when something's made by
mid journey they can tell when something's made by um dali like all all these ais have a style
like an artist yeah and they all end up being derivative and worthless um yeah i i i i
don't i don't buy it personally i don't buy it i think what what i think we value art because of
the human connection it's not it's not a part of it we've tried to get rid of ever also if you are
the kind of person who can't like there's loads of you know guys on twitter being like well i would
hang this in my house and i have and because that's how good
i like it that's how much i like this ai art i've made and it's like that's fine you can do that but
you are a a angry little coding man from silicon valley or whatever you aren't in the you aren't
buying art now the art world existed without you before.
It will keep existing without you.
They don't need...
And also these people work in the industry.
They have a vested interest in bigging up
the significance of this development.
It's like someone with...
What a surprise, the guy with a million dollars worth of Bitcoin
says Bitcoin is the future.
Yeah, but also the people who like art now
aren't the ones saying it is what i
mean no so so when they're like yeah well i could do all this ai art and it's like yeah okay but
none of the people who like art like that only you like that and you don't like art
so what does that mean you might as well get you might as well get live life love on your wall
yeah well you've just got a robot to draw your favorite things you've gone i like reindeer and i like metal gear solid so i want him hanging out
with a reindeer solid snake and you go yeah the ai can do that it's gonna look great um
or it's gonna look like what you want but no one else wants that
and it's not individual really in the same way it's almost like saying that one day sex robots
will replace all human sex yeah yeah yeah and that's just not going to happen is it no matter
how good the robots get it's just not going to happen because there's something fundamental about
real physical intimacy and also just that require that requires to human being intimacy i
would say and validation and yes exactly experience and so much yeah we it's it's as you say the
people who always go on about how it's going to replace things it's like um all writers will be made redundant by AI, says bitter, failed writer who codes for AI.
And you go, right, okay.
No, I think there's some projection going on here.
Yeah.
I think there's a little bit of projection going on here.
In the same way, there's projection the other way, where people go, if only they made Elon Musk read Wuthering Heights, then he wouldn't be so fucking weird.
It's like, no, I don't think literature can solve everything.
The study of literature can't solve everything.
No, no.
What would you use AI to do, Phil?
I used AI in my last Edinburgh Fringe poster.
Yes, I think that's pretty good.
Certainly saved me a lot of money on stock images.
You're not making comedy posters as for as
art you're making them to can you know yeah the message across also it's because i had an idea
and i needed an image of a black and white audience uh picture where they were all laughing
and looking at the camera and that didn't really exist stock images came close but even the closest
stock image was um not very high resolution and was like 150 quid
i think i think the main use of ai will be removing a layer of um admin work from from uh
from the economy and freeing up an entire class of people who otherwise would have been
administrators or fact checkers or proofreaders or data um entry and interests but even then like ai hallucinates
we've seen it hallucinates data and makes it up yeah right yeah and then also i think that i think
that that can be patched up in a way that you know the the gap between ai and human art can't i maybe it's also like uh with some ai my my my my so my my my aphorism my
catchphrase is that the industrial revolution ended manual labor and ai revolution will end
menial labor interesting that's my soundbite sound bite i maybe yeah yeah i mean i i kind of hope so um i mean again with the caveat that it
in the industrial revolution didn't end all manual labor and ai won't end all manual labor but it'll
significantly reduce it yeah the other problem is that a lot of these ais that what you feed them they the
company owns or like they use it to teach themselves things so if you had a unique invention
and you asked an ai what you thought about it you'd be telling your secret to the ai it would
know the secret and that's that's dodge because it could burp it out to someone else yeah yeah
so you got to watch out for that.
Speaking of burping robots,
we should do some correspondence.
Yes, let us listen to the correspondence.
This is really Phil and Pierre.
Definitely not an AI.
They have left so they can go eat some burgers.
Burgers.
Ring rings.
Keep emails.
Phone calls. Your sister will manage. correspondence we've heard from rob rob you corn on the cob you corn on the cob Rob cher frère d'humeur
de l'ami du pipi
is that
Philippe Pierre?
dear shit brothers and piss friends
ah
cher frère
we began as
piss brothers and became
shit friends
I hope you're both well it's
not quite in keeping with the usual tat mr wang whispers but i thought this rather extreme bumper
sticker was so strange i had to share it so spotted a while ago in the good old US of A on the rear of a baby blue colored hip new VW Beetle convertible.
Oh, wow.
Okay, so that's the car.
They make a dream.
Likely driven by a young, cool Los Angelino.
Or maybe a fun-loving soccer mom.
Aw.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's nice to have a little sticker or two highlighting your love's core beliefs or just a bit of fun.
Hmm. Sure. Why not? Why not? Why not? Why what's this? Put a little bit or two highlighting your love's core beliefs or just a bit of fun. Sure.
Why not?
Why not?
Why what's this?
Put a little bit of yourself on that car.
Yeah, but it's...
Get a bit of yourself on your bumper.
Yeah.
For the traffic.
What's this I spy?
A dog paw print sticker with a lovely rainbow pattern
highlighting the driver's love of animals and their
support for the LGBTQgbtqi plus
community i don't think i think it's a gay bear sticker oh i think it's a bear paw
oh really yeah i think right i'll zoom in on it and i'll show you on the camera
let me see oh i don't know it's quite dog like for me it's quite dog like
it could also be
brass knuckles
it might be brass knuckles
it might be
a queer street fighting ring
queer street fighting ring
yeah it could be
I do absolute radio in Soho
and there's at least one
gay bear shop.
Yeah.
All it does is gay bear business.
Yeah.
And that's got a paw logo.
So that's why I think it's gay bears.
Does it look like that paw there?
I think so.
Let me check my closet.
I don't know.
I think that's a pretty good guess.
But what would be the
the game plan there then you put a bear sticker on your bumper hoping behind you an interested bear
in a different car rolls up and sees it and they he takes down your license plate number yeah
and looks you up that way or gives you a little honk
and say i'm just i found a sticker lgbt poor pet friendly pet i'm a pet friendly
gay does that need to be said yeah i'm gay but don't don't make don't don't want you to think that just that
means i hate animals i'm one of the gay people who doesn't hate animals okay so this is an
imagine that this is a sticker that's called gay pride rainbow poor lgbt bear dog pet car sticker
so they're covering all the bases there for google search too many words okay right now this one yeah
but this has little
sharp bits coming out of the toe but it's the same otherwise that looks like a claw to me
but the last thing you showed me had no sharp claw bits and looked to me like dog paw yeah
it's i don't really know what it's for i think it's lgbt dog. I think that's all it is. Do you think?
Yeah.
I'm trying to find someone saying... This is LA.
It's a land of identity.
Yeah, I guess.
I'm trying to find reviews where people go like,
love getting this for my gay-friendly dog groomers or something.
Poor print.
Yeah.
That's Phil scratching his neck. With my hind leg with his hind leg sorry yeah he needs a
sticker yeah the reviews just say that they think it's great
the reviews of the sticker yeah sorry my my oven is beeping for no reason. Oh, that's what that is, yeah. My girlfriend likes to pour water all over the oven.
Hang on.
Are the cookies done?
It sounds like the cookies are done.
Oh, wow, Pierre's left me alone.
I don't think this has ever happened.
Well, I guess we'll talk about cookies.
I've always been a fan of cookies with a chewy
middle bit
a little variation
texture I think can really add to the
oh thank goodness
I was speaking about
I was speaking about cookies
I was just saying to the pod buds that I've never been left alone
in that situation
and I had to start
talking about what kinds of cookies i like
because did you that's the last thing i said did you and um so okay well okay that's regardless
of the meaning i think we're broadly in agreement of of what it is it's some
but that's not what we're talking about, Phil. No.
No?
That's not the sticker we're interested in.
Okay, what is the sticker?
Wow, so, okay, this is a distraction.
So, Rob goes on.
Then what's this?
Above and to the right on the rear windscreen.
So it's at the top right of the rear windscreen.
Yeah. A yellow warning sticker
so it's one of those yellow warning stickers like a hazard yeah yeah like baby on board
oh yeah oh yeah yeah uh it's not a triangle but it's oh no it is a triangle it's a diamond it's
a diamond oh yeah it's a diamond uh what does it say maybe it says
baby on board or something like if you're close enough to read this you're too close or something
to do with the emergency services what do you think it says phil if you guess this i will give
you a hundred pounds does it have anything to do with a dog no i would not say so i'm going to say it says it's two words
oh what was your guess what was your guess going to be before i said that
honk if you like handjobs interesting more even more direct than a sticker with a rainbow on
i reckon it just says, fuck me.
Jesus Christ.
What?
I thought that's what you're going for.
You said very direct.
I said, I'd give you a hundred pounds if you guessed it.
That means it's got nothing to do with the first sticker.
It means it's a hard, like you're not going to get this,
but I'd love to see you try.
Right, okay.
Here's your clue.
It's fucking crazy it's not an addendum to the previous I'm going to say it says
Bus enthusiast
What?
Bus enthusiast
Very hypocritical to be driving a car with that on
Well, yeah, that's what would make it a surprising thing
to have on your car. Yeah, no, it doesn't say
bus enthusiast, Phil. It says pedophile
killer. Wow!
Look.
Look at that.
I can't see it. You're showing
me the wrong part of the phone
yeah there we go
fucking hell it really does say that
and spelt the American way
yeah pedophile
pedophile killer
well when I suggested it said fuck me
and you went Jesus Christ
I thought wow okay I guess it's not that harsh
but it's harsher
I said it was fucking mental
I said fuck me fucking mental i just meant
like i said fuck me because you were just like well the the you start with the rainbow paw and
then you just go straight in with you know shag my hoop i'm a bear or something and the sticker
it's like no no no no no no yeah yeah yeah no you're right yeah you you you answer these
sometimes like you live in a world that makes sense.
The world is chaos.
So you were appalled because my guess made too much sense.
And it was just like it lined up too much.
It was too.
I don't think you were grasping the scale of how crazy it was because I was looking at the phrase pedophile killer.
Well, now I understand. Yeah. Oh, oh man pedophile killer so rob says yes you know it's that helpful
warning that surely is easy to source as a sticker from most shops simply stating pedophile killer
um yes you read that right a driver of a fun vw wants to ensure other road users are absolutely clear that they're in the
proximity of someone who will without doubt kill pedophiles or pedophiles if you're american but
i'm not going to argue that point with them um oh i didn't know first sorry rob he says what are
the chances phil could guess the phrase based on the clues noun for someone unsavory followed by
noun for another unsavory person oh that's a violent killer that's good i still think the odds were quite low
wow oh my god um americans also say pederast pederast yeah sometimes they do yeah but that's
an ancient greek sort of word. Wow, is it?
Yeah, it's very old-fashioned.
It's very old-fashioned.
What's the technical definition of that?
I'm going to look that up.
Define.
Define pederast.
A man who engages in sexual activity with a boy or youth.
Okay, so it's specific.
Yeah, it's an ancient Greecece thing it's a bit of a
yeah it seems a bit specific like why why do we need that word now i think it's just some
weird old-fashioned thing that's hanging out hanging around in america as they all do
old english words hide in america like nazis in South America. Do you think?
Yeah, that's it.
Pederast.
You're a goddamn pederast.
Sweet Pete has sent us some tat.
Sweet Pete.
So sweet.
I feel complete.
It's a can of wine.
Oh, yeah.
Would you drink this wine, Phil?
It says dry French vegan.
Yeah. I mean, this wine, Phil? It says dry French vegan. Yeah.
I mean, nothing wrong with those things in a wine.
All those things together in a canned wine.
I'm getting a little nervous.
Here's the description.
We're wine for the moments that matter.
No, I don't want it.
In brackets.
And the magically meaningless ones too
what does that mean no it just means buy this and drink this all the time we don't care
i would love to buy wine that says buy this and drink this all the time
on the back so just no idea of responsibility at all just buy this and drink it all the time please
well in the morning yes yeah this was the competing campaign to drink responsibly
it was between drink responsibly and buy this and drink this all the time yeah yeah yeah it
came down it was 52 48 in the end nationally um is there any more information about what the wine is oh yes oh yes
in a way um i think also magically meaningless moments to drink wine in feels a bit like even
when you're munted and can't remember where you are just have another can yeah or like the morning breakfast yeah on the school run put
it on your cereal in the shower in the shower that's meaningless moment why not have a wine
have it in the shower fall over be discovered days later it's wine um we're wine for the moments
that matter and the magically meaningless ones too.
We'll be your sons out wine.
Brunch wine.
Festival wine.
Whatever wine.
Whenever.
Let's wine.
In other words, Pierre,
buy this and drink this all the time.
Buy this and drink this all the time.
You whispered their vibe before I even read it.
And then the final phrase there, Phil.
I don't know if you've picked up on that.
Let's wine
no
really gross the verbification of nouns continues i thought this was over it keeps going the end of
this there's more uh footnotes hashtag wine whenever. If I went to someone's house and they went,
I've always got a bottle of wine in the fridge for whenever,
I'd go, okay.
Are you okay?
We're needy.
Talk to us.
And then their email address.
Or stalk us.
And then their Instagram.
And then.
I'm going to see it.
And then...
I don't know how many followers they have.
Oh, yeah.
Scan this ugly QR code to find out why this can has a bit of extra breathing room.
Oh, what does that mean, a bit of extra breathing room?
Like it's not filled to the brim?
Are you angry that we haven't filled your everyday wine can to the fucking brim?
Scan this QR code. angry that we haven't filled your everyday wine can to the fucking brim.
What's the name of this?
Would you show me the wine brand?
The Instagram is terrible.
At Drink Nice.
You're kidding!
Drink Nice.
What have they got?
Okay.
Let's see how many people decided to stalk them.
22.9 thousand people.
That's disappointingly high.
Come on everyone.
Oh yeah, I've seen these guys around.
I've seen these cans about.
Nice.
Drink it nice.
Scan this ugly QR code.
Fuck off.
I don't want to imagine someone reading that and going yeah they are ugly aren't they shut up will well will wackaging ever ever be gone
no it must work mustn't it
mustn't it i guess it must yeah yeah i guess it tricks people into thinking they're taking part in like
a cute project like someone's little project and not a multi-million pound company yeah
yeah i think that's right it's gross well phil look it's time to go to the wackaging wine company for vips only okay yeah
that's fine let's do that um otherwise see you all very soon pierre is on the soho theater
theater guys tickets are uh 60 sold something like that we're over halfway so you're gonna
miss out if you don't get on it. Please. Get down on it.
So, yes, I would love to see you guys there.
I would love to have lots of kojish in the crowd.
Lots of kojish.
Lots of kojish there.
And I am in the Canary Islands.
So if you can find me in the Canary Islands,
I'm not going to tell you which one.
I will say hello.
Yeah.
Enjoy.
Enjoy.
Enjoy, everyone.
Much love.
Goodbye.
Bye.