Castle Super Beast - CSB 008: B2P SHLOOTERS
Episode Date: February 26, 2019Download for Mobile | Podcast Preview | Full Timestamps Titsnfall 2, Battle Angel Alita, Anthem, Oscars, Travis Strikes Again. You can watch us record the podcast live on twitch.tv/castlesuperbeast... Outro: Hironobu Kageyama - Omae no Tettsui ni Kugi wo Ute Vampire: The Masquerade announcement at next month's GDC? Apex Legends is 'aware' of disproportionate hitbox issues Nintendo's Reggie Fils-Aime retiring in April Refreshingly, there are no major DLC plans for Devil May Cry 5 outside of one big free update Skybound Games is bringing Skullgirls to Xbox One and Switch this Spring Three Resident Evil Nintendo Switch Ports Will Appear On May 21, 2019 Kyo, Iori, Athena, Mai, And Leona Join Phantasy Star Online 2 As New Costumes Hai domo! Yoko Taro Is Set To Become A Virtual YouTuber In March Full List of 2019 Oscar Winners
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Tasha
Nice
If you're intoÃ
Check the B igual
If you've got guts
Check everything
Put it into place
Keep it alive
Check it out
Check everything
And now
Check everything
Check everything
Check everything
Check everything
Check everything
Good morning
Good morning
Good afternoon
Good afternoon
Good afternoon
That's correct
How is everyone today?
That's fantastic
Great
Grat...
Grat...
Can we start it over?
We're not live yet, are we?
We are live
Shit
We can start it over though
I feel like...
We can start it over
Okay, yeah, let's just start it over
Good afternoon
Hey, good afternoon
How are you today, Willie?
Great
That's fantastic
That's just super
Yeah
Getting used to the idea of
Good morning being replaced with good afternoon
Because my body
Is ready
Ah!
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
Ha!
Is now fully adjusted to the idea of
My day starting afternoon
So...
Good afternoon
Oh man
You look like you're having some delicious afternoon energy
Yeah, right
I will say one thing though
I'm very glad but
This
Delicious, delicious energy sugar-free
Has actually enabled me to redamage my sleep schedule
Ah!
So I've...
I don't know if people have noticed or you've noticed, Willie
But for the past month, I have been ping-ponging
From a normal, perfect human being sleep schedule
To that of my dad's
Which is going to bed at 9
4, 4 hours
And waking up at 5 am
To my old one
Which is going to bed at 4
Wake up at never
Mm-hmm
Mm-hmm
And the worst part about it is that every time I'm like
Wow, I'm up at like 9 am
I can have a regular breakfast
And go out and face the world
And then I start a stream at 8 pm with a yawn
Yep
And I am like
Uh-oh
I have built my entire life
Around being awake from 7 pm to 2 in the morning
Which is now when I want to die
Yeah
See, rules exist so that you don't have to listen to your body
And when you have to show up for places at certain times
It forces you to do things that are uncomfortable
Because if you do listen to your body
Your body will betray you
My body betrays me quite often
It will fuck you over at the first given chance
There are so many times when my body betrays me
Number one
Can't be trusted
Hey, this is a good time to go to sleep
No, it's not, buddy
Yep
Alternatively, you don't really need to sleep
Yeah, I do, buddy
Yep
Can't be trusted
You really need to go to the bathroom
That's weird, I actually didn't
You don't need to go to the bathroom for hours
Yeah
No, that's not true
You lied
You lied to me, internal organs
Are you hungry or is that just a stomach ache?
Are you nauseous and sick?
Or do you just need a bagel?
Yeah
That one is the actual worst
Because I will wake up and I will be like
Near-vomiting level nauseous
But it turns out that's hunger
Yeah
Occasionally
And in particular, the lack of sleep
And to early wake up drowsiness
Transitions seamlessly
Seamlessly
Into migraine for me
Oh, yeah?
That's where the most...
That's unlucky
Like, it is an artistic, Oscar-worthy transition
Of how that pain becomes one into the other
If I don't pay attention to it
Let me ask you, what kind of migraines do you get?
Uh, I mean, just sharp
You get the sharp ones?
Sharp
Okay
Sharp, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you
Now, now, now, now, now, fix now, now, now
Where is it, where is it hanging out?
Is it hanging out in your temples behind the eyes?
It's not the behind the eyes, it's the temples
And it's the like...
But it's coded in exhaustion
So it's hard to separate
Because it's like, this is something that I would get back
When I was like having fatigue at work
And like, it always felt like
I associate it with a severe need to sleep
And not do anything
That's correct, yeah
And I don't know, I don't think, I don't know if that's the same
That any other people get in general
Lack of sleep will make any of that worse
So that's not uncommon
So it's always cowded and...
Cowded, it's always covered and coded in drowsiness
You know, that's how it is
And it's coming in right here
And it's knives, right here
So for me, it's behind the eye
And it's always on one side of my head predominantly
And it's nearly always caused by
An incredibly specific environmental trigger
I don't just get them, right?
And sleep doesn't do it
For me, it's sense
Due to an incredibly powerful perfume allergy
Which, when people say they have perfume allergies
That expands to more things than you would expect
It expands to any scent that a human being
Could place on their body
So I gotta buy the fucking unscented deodorant
Or else I get vomit level sick
That's unfortunate
Because a lot of people use things to smell good
Yeah, and you know what causes that to happen
With people like me?
You get a fucking unconscious association
That you hate to be around those people
Yeah
Because you actually feel like you're going to die
And the other thing is sunlight
If I get caught walking down the wrong side of the street
At the wrong time of day
You know that bullshit, ah, my son's in the house
Guaranteed by the time I get home
I'm gonna feel like the sun stabbed me
You're probably gonna need to stay away from Vegas
So it's UV light
Otherwise my life would be hell
It has to be sunlight
I mean, all I know is that the heat and sunlight in Vegas
Is the most scalding it's ever been
Because it's desert sun
Well, luckily you don't have to go out during the day in Vegas
No
They have lights for the night time
Yes
And in fact, standing in the shade immediately drops everything
Your core temperature just plummets
Deserts are weird
But it really is like a fucking angry Mario 3 son
While you're out there
Chasing you
Yeah, if that's what your weakness is
Then you want to be fucking careful
So my mom gets the migraines
And unfortunately she gets them just like anything
Like they're random
But, and like many women who get constant migraines
She has a bonus that I don't think you or I have to worry about
She gets the fucking auras
You know about that shit?
O-A-U-R-A auras
Oh, you're not familiar?
Okay, so everybody
Are they like the vapors?
Everybody in my family gets migraines
It is an ongoing thing
It's hereditary, it sucks
The women in my family
Yes, the women in my family
They get migraines with auras
And what that is
Is that the migraine is so intense
That you are seeing wispy colors around objects
So your mother gets the auras
Yes
Okay
You see stands
Okay
Around
And it is a type of hallucination
And I can only think that that is like
Your brain, because the migraines
You're fucking brain swelling and shit
It's just pushing on parts of your head
To make the color go
Ooh
Yeah
That sounds like
That's yeah, that's not great
That's basically light concussion
Yeah, that is actually exactly what it is
It's a company with nausea
And occasionally dizziness
And it is in fact very similar to
A temporary concussion
So, hey mom, how you feeling?
Going to sleep?
Migraine
Okay, bye mom
But then they give you those fucking
Codeine tunnels
Yeah
And then once you hit 50-ish
They stop giving them to you
Because they're afraid they're going to
Turn all the old people into the drug addicts
Um, yeah, that sounds like a lifelong problem
With no clear solution
There is no solution
In fact, my migraines
And this is the fun callback
If you all remember
The funsies of redhead genetics
Redheads have incredibly high resistance
To opiate painkillers
Which means even the high end
I could steal these and sell them
To street urchins, painkillers
Don't do nothing
So the only thing I actually have options for
Is to just go run my head
Under the hottest shower I can stand
For like an hour and a half
Until it passes
I'm sure there's a point in time
When that resistance will be useful in life
Well, considering my dad
Went in for his triple bypass
And they asked him to count down from 10
And he's like, got it
And he passed out
And then he woke up
When he saw them spinning the saw
To get into his chest
And went, ah!
And then the doctor went, ah!
Um, it's way more likely to kill me
Than it is to actually be helpful
Yeah
You know, if you wake up during surgery
You just die, right?
Um, is that how that works?
Well, yeah, cause...
I just thought it was massively traumatizing
Well, that's the thing
It's the trauma of waking up
With people digging around inside your torso
Yeah
That's not a natural act
I mean, I...
No, but people have survived that
They just get really, really fucked up from it
Well, not the ones with heart conditions
Well
I mean, assuming you don't wake up
To the point that you are pulling shit out
And trying to fight off
Oh, you can't
You'd probably be all frozen
I imagine
And it's like when they put you under
For a triple...
Or anything big like that
The doctor has to come and sit down to you
Because they have to explain to you
Not just stuff like that
They have to explain, okay
You're gonna wake up in the ICU, right?
You're gonna have that thing in your throat
That, you know, defeats you
And makes you breathe
Yeah
That's gonna feel like you're dying
You're not dying, you're fine
Don't freak out
Yeah
Cause if you freak out
You could just die
Yeah, okay
Yeah
That's the speech they give you
For afterwards when you're fine
I don't think there is a speech for
Okay, so they took your heart out of your chest
And then they're poking you
Et cetera
Yeah
Again, I imagine that
You come out of that
Probably never willing to trust a doctor again
Or a hospital again
A few people that I remember reading about
Who survived that
Are, like, broken
Yeah
Yeah, so that seems about right
It's the basic equivalent of
Trench surgery
Yeah
You know, or, like, battlefield dressing
Like, it's just not fucking
Something you're gonna get over ever
But at the same time, like
I don't know, is it like, I'm wondering
Is it like sleep paralysis where, like
Okay, you wake up and then
You see what's going on
But if they see your eyes open
Then they're gonna probably know
Well, I mean, when you're juiced
Your eyes could be kind of open
And you not actually be there
Hmm
Yeah
The real fun one
One fear
You don't fuck it, I'll tell another one
One fear
My poor dad had many mishaps
During his trips to the hospital
So there was that one
Which scared the shit out of everybody
And then they juiced the fuck out of
They juiced him, like, twice as much as normal
But then the other one is when he went in
Before he got his pacemaker
He went in for a second round of heart attacks
Yeah, that's right, he went into the hospital
To have a second round
He's like, I don't know, that first one was pretty weak
So they juiced, so they...
So I'm using the term too loosely
When I said they juiced him
I meant they juiced him with the drugs
So he died for a bit
And then they zap him, right?
They zap him, you know, give him a good old
Defib, right?
Now that hurts
They don't talk about this
But that hurts like shit
Like it's bad
Yeah
However, in the
In the ongoing, like, ah
Ah, everything's going to shit
That little beeper that they keep on your finger
Yes
For your EKG, fell off
Oh
So it still showed him as flatline
Oh
And they didn't notice
So he woke up with the
With the first jolt
And he's like, ah
Right?
But then they go, oh no
He's still flatline
Hit him again
And the guy
Clear
And goes to do it
And my dad holds his hands up and goes
No, stop
And the dude drops the paddles
And like
Goes stone still
And then like just
Essentially finished up
And then ran away
And apparently that like
Freaked that guy out more
Than he's ever been freaked out
Working that job ever
Because if he had zapped him
The second time
He would have stopped his heart
Almost certainly
And by some little
Foyble
Uh oh, it fell off
So
Modern medicine is a miracle
Yes
Unbelievable how far we've come
In terms of scientific advancement
We're putting organs from other people
Into new people
We are saving lives at a rate
That no one has ever seen before
We're growing ears on mice
The fact that those things
Can still happen
I'm not gonna look at it and go how
I'm just gonna say
I'm just gonna say
That is the greatest
Don't fuck with your health
And just exercise and eat properly
Advertisement I've ever heard
Because literally
No matter how amazing
Modern medicine is
The best way to not have a situation
Like that happen is to not be on the table
And the way you don't end up on the table
Is by just doing the healthy shit
Hey doc, where's your watch?
I don't know
Yeah
That's weird
I had it when I went into the operation
Just eat a fucking salad
And take a walk
Because that's it
Like the temporary mouth pleasure
Of that awful, awful thing you're putting in
That's gonna ruin you later on
Is like the real risk is
When you're there on that table
And modern medicine happens to fail you
If you happen to be that statistic
It's not even that
That sucks
Let's just say
You're in an operating room
And an orderly trips over the cable
That hooks you up to the breathing machine
That's it
People trip and fall
People drop things
People sneeze
A friend my age
Had a fucking kidney stone
Oh no
From drinking too much juice
That's the worst thing
That could ever happen to a person
And I'm like alright
We're done
Juice is done
You're out
That was it
I'm like no
There's nothing not worth it
It's like giving birth to a rock
We're out
You know
All of these things
There's always that like
Someone that is a peer
Or really really close to you
In terms of lifestyle or age
Or size
Has something go really really wrong
And you go wow
Nope fuck that
So I got
I got a buddy of mine
Who has a relative
This relative is an old man
And has never been healthy in his entire life
This old man
Smoked as much as he could
Every day of his life
George Burns
Eight
Whatever the fuck he wanted
And got to be a big fat old guy
Said exercise is fucking dumb
And any time a family member was like
Hey man
He was like you shut up
I'm a big man
Right
Cue a heart transplant
Nothing has changed
Yeah
Leading to a second batch of heart attacks
And the story that was told
Of their
What's the cardiologist
Running into a room
With like a pamphlet of papers
Going motherfucker are you still smoking
Yeah
I remember like
Yeah I've heard the stories
About like I told them before
But just like the dad that's like
Yes I've had the replace
The fucking the bypass and all that
But I just want my steaks
I don't have a lot longer left
Just leave me alone
And you're like fuck
If that's where you're at
Then so be it I guess man
But no like there is no age where
It is worth it to possibly be waking up
On a fucking table
Or having a stone
Or just all kinds of other shit like that
Or just like man
Nah
Nah not worth it
I took experimental acne medication
When I was young
And could have ended up with crippling liver disease
Yeah there you go
Lucky me that I didn't
See the thing for me though is that
What fucks me up is the fact that
So you have all this
And you can look to the past
And you can look to your dad
And like learn all the stories
You can look at that
And you can make a rough tabulation
Diet is more or less the same
Smoking removed
Okay then this means that if things go on
As they are now
This
Yeah
Right and you go
I'm the only fat person in my entire family
There is no one else
On both sides
I wouldn't call you fat at all
Well
By comparison
Okay
Everyone is
A family of life
Jaguar people
And tall
I'm also pretty short for my family
Fuck off
Yeah
So
No no fuck off
No I mean I've explained this before
But like they're all tall and lean
And I am the complete opposite
I am like you take them
And you drag that bounding box down
And pull it out a little bit
So like it is weird
Because yeah the rest of
The Madden's on this side
And my mom's side
Like it's all fucking just
Not me
So
The other thing too of course is the fact that
By
You know a bunch of them being like super
Adventist and stuff
They have the big health message
And they're eating super green and all that
But in general from the
From when I was first like
When we were all kids
I was always just shaped differently
So
I don't have any reference points
To go off of in my family
Where I can figure out like
Oh this guy's kind of like
What I'll be like no
I don't look anything like anyone else
In my family
On the bove side
I'm the tall one
Right
Yeah
Yeah right
My
The bove side of the family
Is often so short that nearly
All the women
Are technically considered little people
Despite not having dwarfism
They're just really
Small people
And on the other side of my family
Everyone is tall
And the farther up that line you go
I mean
Fucking tall
I had a great uncle who was like
6'9
No no
He was 6'6
6'6
Which
I don't even know what that's like
Man
It's
I need stilts and shit
It's just normal
No it's not normal
Shut up
Don't you dare
The
I should probably clarify
When I say I don't look like anyone in my family
I mean in terms of proportions
Facially
I can see exactly where my features come from
So it's not a question of that
But
Yeah
There's
Like
I mean
It's one of those things where like
I've been told
Like
Oh you know
You kind of
You're a lot like grandpa
Yeah no
I've been told I look just like relatives that died
Before I was born
Yeah
So you get that sometimes
But I'm still just like
Oh were they like
Chubby like me too
And I was like
No
Like okay
So
Not really
Most of them weren't spoiled
In Canada
Yeah
Yeah
Too many
Too many
Like
Too many
Peanut butter sandwiches
Too many put sins man
Yeah
At some point
Peanut butter with cheese sandwiches
Just that
That weird experiment
What is that
That was a thing
What is that
I've
I've talked about that before for sure
Yeah
That is
Causing a fucking
Vomit reflex for me
Sounded horrible
When my cousin suggested it
Took a bite
Legit went
That shouldn't work
But it does
I don't want to hear this
It's like the first time
Okay so me
Like this has happened to me so many times
Well you're talking about somebody who fucking
Separates his food on the plate
I know
And that's fine
And I'm somebody who
Definitely gets grossed out by weird shit
Like
When I first heard about fondue
I'm like that is disgusting
Get away from me
Really
That seems kind of normal
I thought that was super gross
I'm like what you're doing
You're dipping
Why would this type of fruit
Combined with chocolate taste good
You're fucking crazy
That sounds nuts
Right
And then I tried it
I'm like no you're wrong
That was good
And there's a lot
There's weird things like that
Like you know you hear about the
Put the fries in the Wendy's
Frosty or whatever it's called
Right
You hear that and I'm like
That sounds horrible
You're a monster
Get away from me
And then it's like
You put the fry in the thing
And you taste it
And you're like oh shit
That actually works
Then you hear about bacon
Plus ice cream
And I'm like fuck you
You're crazy
But then it works
Hey I've got one for you
Salty and sweet
It does a thing
Would you ever test this out
Would you ever dip
Your lay's natural potato chips
Into mustard
As if it were a dip
Yeah she's out of her mind
I'm not
I'm not
What I'm saying is
You take some chips
And you can crush them up
And you sprinkle it on your sandwich
And that's a good shit
But ultimately
All of this
Like trust me
I understand the concept
Of grossness of these two things
They should not work together
Right
And then someone goes hey don't
Knock until you try it
And I'm like fuck you
Right
Yeah I know sometimes
The answer to that is fuck off
Yeah
But as I sliv and breathe today
As I sit here before you
I swear to God
That my cousin handed me
A peanut butter sandwich
Like sliced
Like crab cheese or whatever
That had just like sliced
Just had some sliced matzah
Inside there
And it was actually pretty good
I don't like this
And it was not a strong cheese
It was like the kind of cheese
That you know like I guess
Like strong cheeses would be like
That'd be no
Oh yeah don't get some
Brea or blue
It was more just kind of like
The light texture combined
With crunchy peanut butter
And then also I don't know
If you've ever like
You know when you put peanut butter
On a sandwich and it's like
The toast is just just warm
Yeah
So it kind of melts the peanut butter
A bit
You get the gooeyness
It's that with the melted cheese
Alright I'm gonna vomit
Okay that's fine
That's fine
You know what the other thing is though
I'm one of those people that like
I promise you
I know how crazy it sounds
I'm one of those people that like
When I eat a food
And be like
Oh this tastes really good
But the texture makes me want to die
Like I can't enjoy
Fucking squid
Anything with squid in it
Yeah
It's the texture
Fucking
I'm still honestly
Like when the whole default hot dog
Sandwich mayo relish thing
I don't dig that at all
No I don't like that
I don't like those three being
The default condiments
Because I'm like they don't
Well that's different
Anywhere
They don't compliment each other
Whatever your default is
On any particular location
The condiments don't compliment
They don't
I think a certain type of
Like one of those long
European style hot dogs
With like
Like a fucking frankfurter
Yeah
Like one of those
With like a Dijon
Is great
Yeah sure
I don't even like mustard
But I get that
Yeah
Right with the little things in it
The little seeds in it
Yeah
You put that by itself
Totally
You don't fucking put ketchup in relish
It's good enough with just that
I think relish doesn't work
With any other thing
That you would put on a burger
It really sucks
I'm sorry
The fucking hot dog
That trifecta is horseshit
I feel like I've been lying to you for years
This is cool
Yeah
And you know what the ultimate proof is
They made something called burger sauce
Uh huh
Right
And burger sauce is a combination of all three
That you're meant to just put
Quick squeeze and go
So that you don't have to worry about
Putting all three together
Yeah no that's too much work
And it's horrible
That's
It tastes so disgusting
Right
I don't like that
So fuck that mix
And like the things that you wouldn't expect
To mix
Or I'm like you know what
Fuck all that relish shit
Fuck the mustard on it
And ketchup on the dog
Right
And I'm like you know what
Throw me one of those mayo's
And you put ketchup
And you put the little bit
You put the line of mayo
And you're like you know what
There you go
Now it works
Right
So those two together
Actually work because ketchup plus mayo
With the right proportions
Is big mac sauce
If I
I'm torn on mayo
Because I'm not sure if it's me
Or my brain that hates it
Because if you put mayo on something
And if you said hey
Here's the thing
You put a mayo on it
And it took a bite out of it
It might as well just spit it on the floor
Right
But if it's one of those things
That I ate it
And you're like by the way
There was some mayo mixed in there
Yeah
I'll shrug
Yeah
But like I feel like mayo needs
To be diluted heavily
Mayo you can't think about what mayo is
Just eggs man
Yeah it's just a gross egg sauce
And it's super nasty
Yeah but like
But it tastes great
And mayo chicken as an Asian dish
That you order up tastes good
But it's like yeah
So a lot of it is cultural
Here in Quebec in particular
Mayo on fries is the thing
Yeah I don't like it
That's what we do
I don't like it
Just give me a little thing of catch up
But anyone that's not you
That lives here will be like
What the fuck are you doing
Had to give these fries without the mayo
Well unless you're out in France
Or Europe or whatever
You go to the carry hot dog
What are you gonna do
Knock at mayo on your fries
Get the fuck out of here
You're not getting fries
I don't want mayo on my fries man
Well
Are you just gonna offend everybody?
Yes
Yes I am
Yeah
I live in this city
Just as long as the rest
You fucking assholes
I want catch up on these
God damn fries
I just don't understand where the relish
Comes from
I don't know
I actually also don't get it
There's nothing I can think of where I'm like
You know what this needs
Some fucking cut up salty pickles
I recently had
I recently had a fucking
A vinegar situation
Where I ordered a sandwich on the internet
From the Uber Eats
And I'm like oh I'm excited to have this sandwich
So it's a sandwich that has
Like okay
You can add 35 different vegetables
To this fucking thing
Right?
You can add cucumbers
You add fucking
Five different kinds of onions
Whatever right
On this list
You know the little drop down list
None of those options are pickles
Zero
Were pickles
So I go
Okay just hit me with all dressed
Sure enough fucking thing comes
Rife
With pickles
And pickles offend me
Because all I can taste is vinegar
Yeah
And I can't eat vinegar
Because if vinegar goes on the food that I'm eating
Every taste in the food leaves
Other than vinegar
Which isn't a taste that I enjoy
Yeah
So I take one bite in
And I'm like all I taste is fucking pickle
It's literally
There are 30 fucking things in this sandwich
Most of which are vegetables
And I'm tasting
It's like eating a big fucking pickle
Pickles are the fucking weirdest because
I love pickles
And I will grab a jar
And I'll crunch into some of those fuckers
Like non-stop
Do you drink the brine?
No
Yeah, you'd be crazy to just drink the brine
Out of a jar of pickles, huh?
Put the baby preservation water in the fridge
Yeah
Fuck dude
No thank you
But the fucking thing with pickles
Is as much as tasty as they are
Especially you get a good crunchy one
And you do the whole thing
The moment you put it on something as a topping
It ruins it
You can't have pickles on anything
Because it's all pickle then
You have to
It's a very strong flavor
Completely agree
Like pickles are great on their own
You cannot combine it
You cannot combine it
Don't combine pickles with food
When you do the Polish deli thing
And they give you like the
Or the Jewish deli thing
Or they give you the smoked meat
And then they cut the slice of pickle in there
Like
I want this pickle
But I don't want it at the same time as my meat
You know
Yeah
Whenever I go to a place like that
Everybody's happy
Because I'm like
Hey who wants my pickle
And everyone's like
Hey
I just
I don't dig it
I don't dig it
It's great on its own
But you can't put it anywhere
You need at least 10 minutes before and after
A buffer to a pickle time
Pickle needs to have its own time for flavor
Because it's ruining everything else you eat
It's like toothpaste
Calm man
It's like toothpaste
It's gonna fuck with the flavor
Of whatever you're tasting
Toothpaste
Did you know they have like
Flavor fuckers by the way
I'm sorry what
They have these little things you can eat
Where like
It'll make it so that you can't taste anything sugary
For like the next hour or two or whatever
What the actual shit
What the fuck
Yeah they have these things that fuck with your taste buds
That seems
And I think the
I don't trust that
I think the idea behind it is to like
Cut down cravings so that you can't
Like if you have a craving for something
And then you can't actually say it
Then you just won't eat it
What about the people who just
I'll just keep eating it until this thing wears off
I don't know
But I know that they have these little things
That are like
Listerine strips
That seems like a terrible idea
And you can just fuck with the flavors of things
That seems like a terrible idea
There's another one that like amplifies
You know other certain tastes and whatever
And like it's a whole thing I heard about
That they're working on now
It's an industry that they're fucking
Trying to invest in
To make things fuck with flavor
Let's have timed debuffs
You can give yourself
I mean if you could fuck with flavors
So that like
Um
Cause you know how it's
It's like your tongue is like
Your eyes right
When you stare at color
For a certain amount of time
And then stare somewhere else
The bleed off
Yeah it's called a
Neural inhibition
So the after effect will be there right
It's like if I said water
40 times in a row
The word would go away
And it would be replaced
With a nonsense noise
Sure
Um
So that happens with your tongue
If you jack the bitters up
And you know what I mean
And why not
Excite them
So if you can do something
In the future that makes healthy things
Taste like
Not healthy things
Yeah
Then that would be amazing
So I mean it's absolutely
An industry worth checking out
And going into
But right now I think they just
Fuck with your flavors
I think they're just at flavor fuck
Great
Yeah
No thanks
You ever have ketchup
Outside of North America?
No
You've never been outside of North America
Right
Are you seriously?
Seriously?
Think about that for a second
That's true
Ketchup?
I didn't have any ketchup in Japan
No
Okay
Ketchup in certain other places
Like in particular in the islands
Is not what you think it is
It is a weird
Tomato paste
That has like
Like it's not the Heinz
Salty thing
Well I mean
That you expect to get
Do you have
You don't have
Okay
That's my turn to ask a stupid question
You don't have a side branch
French Quebecois relatives right?
I don't think I do
Okay cause
Ketchup
Ketchup
Okay it's like closer to a fucking
Salsa
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Then Heinz tomato ketchup
The tomato paste
Yes
That's pretty much everywhere but
Heinz
Quote unquote
Store ketchup
Heinz ketchup or whatever
But that is
Which is everywhere as far as I know
In Canada and America
Right
You go to a place you order ketchup
You ask for ketchup
That thing
Or you get the Heinz
Or you get the little packet
A real ketchup can be anything
You can make fucking blueberry ketchup
You can make fucking
Green ketchup
But what you actually get
In a lot of other places
Is this other thing
And like for example
Back in Grenada
The main brand was Grace
Grace tomato ketchup
And Grace tasted like shit
It was not
There was no salt to it at all
It really just tasted like
Crushed tomatoes
And like
Weird ground spice
Alright
And it was just like not
This thing tastes better
It just made it taste like shit
And like I don't know
I guess if you got used to it
If that's what you thought
It was the whole time in your life
Then it would be fine
But like after getting accustomed
To normal Heinz ketchup
Like going elsewhere and having that
Was like fucking terrible
Whereas other things
When you get homemade
Like if you go
If you get like homemade guacamole
It's always better
You know a lot of this shit
Like oh we're making like
Homemade tzatziki
It's amazing
But homemade ketchup
Is fucking garbage
Some things have been improved
You know what it reminds me of
Reminds me of
Hey Pat
You like Chinese food
Or you like Thai food
Or whatever right
Yeah sure I like
I like Asian food
Man there's this really
Really authentic place
Down you
Let's go
And I'm like
I'm eating it
Like yep this sure is authentic
I like my garbage fake version
Better probably
Yeah
Yeah
Because that garbage fake version
Has probably been
Literally altered to suit my tastes
So I remember watching
Something
I don't know what it was
I think I was watching
Oh yeah okay so in the
There's a documentary about
General Tao chicken
And
Oh yeah that's a fascinating document
And in it right
They go to a restaurant
In China
That's American style Chinese food
Where all the locals come to
Gawk and go
What the fuck is this
What the fuck is this
Yeah
Yeah
I was like this is what they call
Chinese
Like this weird other thing
That has nothing to do with
Actual authentic Chinese cuisine
But like they have it as a place
Where like
If you're an American businessman
You can go there
And feel at home
And have your
American ass
American Chinese food
Yeah yeah yeah
That exists as a
Functioning business
You know
Because it's that fucking weird
At this point
I don't know man
All I'm saying is
I feel like our
I know that our
Palettes are conditioned
Our tastes are like
You know fucking like limited
To a degree in some ways
And like I remember
Hearing about how
The worst thing you can do for kids
Is let them eat off the kids menu
Because by feeding them the kids menu
What ends up happening is
You just get used to
Chicken finger
Oh palette
Excuse me palette
Well that's why
That's why I like
Because like you said
Palettes like our color
Our color swatches
I'm sorry
I'm saying the word
That I learned in art school
Here in Quebec
What do you want me to tell you
It's in my brain
I did it for three years
And for three years
Of education here
Plus art plus high school
Palette was the word
That was used
Well you're talking on man
I don't know what to tell you
You're talking on a man who has
A speech impediment and word
Salads himself to death nightly
Yeah this is not
I understand
This is not word salad
This is a classroom of
Teachers and students and people
All using the same word
Well you weren't
And then leaving that scenario
And being introduced to a world
Where everyone goes ha ha
And I'm like
Wally you what
You weren't eating that
Patch of color swatches
The palette
Of your mouth
Soft palate in the back
Where the go out
Wooled tunnel through
To get to your brain
It is
It is weirdly limited
Because yeah you give kids
Kids menus
And all they end up doing
Is being like
I want chicken fingers
Ketchup
I want fries
And maybe
I'll eat a fish stick
If I'm feeling daring
And then that bland taste
Is all they really will ever accept
And then the moment you have to
Switch it off to real food plates
They're like
Get this away from me
And then they become picky eaters
So you have to give them
Smaller portions of what you eat normally
And make sure that they know
What adult food tastes like
From an early age
Otherwise that restricted palette
Is what they're going to stick with
And be fussy about the
Yeah I was born into a household
Defined by fucked up weird food habits
In which
All three children
Had bizarre eating things
I can't smell
A goddamn thing
This highly limits the amount of
Tastes that I can appreciate
Which lead to me being
A very picky eater
However I was not
Nearly the pickiest eater in the house
That went to my sister
Because for her
It had nothing to do with taste
It had to do with the fucking
Food on the plate
Did the mash touch the fucking steak
Can't eat it
Like crazed
Meanwhile
I got my fucking brother over here
With a fucking passion flaky
You know those things?
Yeah
He was that fucking piece of shit
That would pop the fucking thing in two
Lick all of the goddamn shit out
Then crunch it back together
And then chew on it like it's a biscuit
Like a fucking freak
That's super weird
Uh yeah
Like the whole thing was
She had a whole like fuck this
I don't want to eat this
Super limited, picky, fussy thing
At first
And a lot of that was based on
Not taste or flavor
But texture
Texture's bad dude
I
But that texture was the only thing that mattered
Yeah
In terms of preference
It's a big deal
I never had that
I'm like wait so the taste of this thing
Being amazing
Doesn't matter to you
I have eaten things that flavor wise
When they hit the tongue and the palate
And all that shit
This is good
But the texture like ruined it for me
And for the texture weirdos
Everyone's got the different ones
For me
Like spongy or rubbery feeling
Doesn't like
I like the taste of
Oh god let me
Okonomoyaki
Okonomoyaki
Yeah
I like the taste
It's pleasant
I will spit it out on my fucking plate
Because it feels like I'm
Slime
It's the slime
And the fucking rubber
It's delicious
Delicious slime
Fuck
It makes me anxious to think about
Right now
Ok
I don't have that
Like texture for me is so
Like it's there
And it's clearly there
Because I prefer
You know
I can get chicken
Or I can get chicken
With a little bit of crisp on the edge of that
Yeah totally whatever
You know texture matters right
You want a little bit of crunch sometimes
You want a little bit of this and that
But you're doing that weird
Suvi shit
You want to sear your steak
On one side before you eat it
Yeah
Crispy bacon versus not crispy
Bacon
You don't want the soft flabby bacon
I do want the soft bacon
Oh no no
Yeah
I want it crispy
Cripsy is my grandmother's
I think most bacon is horribly overcooked
I want it crunch
I want chips
I love
I love the fucking crunch man
See I want
The crunch is fun
But the charcoal is too much
Oh I love it
I'm down
I'm super down with the black
Yeah
But
But
Well that to say
It's never been such a priority
That I would throw out the good tasting thing
Just because of that texture
You know
That's always a weird one to me
Although a rubbery ass steak is really annoying
You have to win it's like
Too fucking
You can barely get into it
You can barely bite it open
But yeah man
Man no thanks on that
It's
I think texture comes in when it's like
What is it like organ meat?
Like
Yeah
Organ meat is the best place where texture fucks you up
If you have liver
If you have the biggest problem with liver
Or tongue
Or any of that
Not
Tongue's the worst
Because the texture is that of your tongue
Yeah
Yeah
It feels like you are eating your fucking tongue
And they have like
They serve up chicken hearts sometimes as well
I have chicken hearts they're okay
But there's a
You know that part of the turkey
Sometimes you bite in and you're like
Oh
Yeah I know
Yeah I know
No
Just a little chewier
Just a little bit
And it feels like you're biting into mashed potato
But it kicks in with this organ-y flavor
Yeah
Fuck that
Some people love that
Hate that
Fucking plate ruined
You don't want to eat the organs
Gotta grab the napkin and spit it out
It's not pleasant
Alright
Fuck
Now I'm kind of hungry
I know
Damn
I had lunch right before I came over here
I did
So I saved myself from that
I woke up
That disaster
I had a red bull
Yeah
And I'm gonna sit here and starve
Oh man that's
You know what
You don't need to eat
You just got energy
That's true
It's
How
Was your week
My week was
Overall honestly fairly dull
Unexciting
Didn't really
In terms of the media consumed
That we would usually talk about
On this here podcast
Video games
I actually went back to dying light
Of all things
Cause I saw it was on sale
I was like oh yeah I had that
But I never got really far
That game's great
And if it's still on sale
I would highly recommend that people
Pick it up
Cause it's super fun
Cause Park
It's the only game I can think of
After Mirror's Edge
That actually has like
Parkour as the main
Stay of the gameplay
Wow way to shit on haze
Or
Fuse
What game are you talking about
The first person shooter
That also had parkour in it
With the dumb name
And it was terrible
Brink
Ah yeah
The thing in a brink
Maybe that's the one
Wait
The fact you can't even be sure
What game you're
You're talking about
Fuck all of them
Fuck all of them
Brink sucks
Brink fucking sucks
I was excited for that game
And then it came out
I was like
No thanks
Parkour
Let's see
I watched
This week's episode of JoJo
At which point
I just
I'm gonna talk
Very carefully here
It has been a big meme
For like a decade plus
Of it just works
Yes
Now I'm not actually that familiar
With part five
Okay
The part that I never anticipated
Was that
In the initial confusion
Of wait what happened
How's that work
You are explicitly
Told
Exactly how it works
Only for you to go
That doesn't make fucking sense
So
That literally makes
No sense at all
So
I don't get it
We hit the credits this week
And yeah let's just talk about it
That's fine
We hit the credits this week
And the first question
I was asked was literally
Wait how does this work
And I was like
How does it work
And you're like
And she's like yeah
It just works
I'm like wait you're at
You are asking me how this works
Yeah
And she's like yeah
Why are you repeating it
And I'm like here hold on
You're asking me
And I type it into Google
How does it
In work
And then it just
Fucking goes
It just goes
And she's like oh no
By the way
And I'm like oh yeah
It almost feels like
David Productions knew
Because the ever
Fantastic video
How does King Crimson Work
How does it work
Came out three years
Prior to the day
Of the airing of that video
So the fucking
I don't know how it works
The fucking thing pops up
And it's just like
Welcome to
The second largest meme
The things you know are
Ora Ora Ora
Muda Muda Muda
The time has stopped
That's number one
Yeah all that
Welcome to number two
And she goes oh my god
Seriously
And I'm like yes
Right
And like let's try to talk
About it
And we went through the basics
But it's like no
You're not gonna figure this out
Given the information we have
In the last episode
That we watched
And the explanation that is
Directly given to the viewer
The explanation
And the events that occurred
Are completely incompatible
Completely incompatible
And it also
Changes depending on
Whether you are
It's like
What's your frame of reference
Is it the past of the
Anyway
It is
The frame of reference
Changes the events
So the whole thing
Is just nonsense
But most importantly
What I was waiting for
Was the sound effect
And we heard
A little like a bell ring
Like it was like a ding
But there was nothing
Like a chime
So I'm waiting for
The sound effect drop
That'll be next week
That'll be next week
Because Dio's clock stopper
Oh, that's great
Is the best
Oh, super good
In terms of sound design
That thing is radical
And I really want to see them
Not
I don't think
You're gonna want it up
But I want to see you do it justice
In a similar way
Because
We've come since then
We've gotten
Kira
Fucking the sound of things
Rewinding
And getting sucked backwards
Awesome
So like now you've got sound design
Bars to fucking clear
So please do it
It's just such a weird introduction
That is the total opposite
Of every single Jojo villain
Up until this date
Because Jojo villains
Have been given
Here's a power set
What can they do with it
I don't know
That's the whole
Last arc of any of them
What are they doing
I don't know
How does cars
I don't know
Right etc
What's Dio
I don't know
What's Kira doing
I don't know
What's King Crimson do
This
I don't know
Yeah
It's very weird
And then Iraqi himself
Was like yeah
I don't know either man
Isn't there
I feel like there was a line
Somewhere from later in part 5
Where Giorno says
I don't know how my stand works
Possibly
If so I don't really
I don't really get it myself
Whatever
That's bullshit but I believe
Yeah it's bullshit but
It's finally Friday
Finally Saturday
That is my favorite fucking
Yeah
Oh man
So Jojo's cool
That remains exciting
I'm glad to we're in the
I guess you would call
The second half now
I want to say that
So that's the thing is
We got here way faster
Than I thought
But then I also
That I saw
Like oh wait that was 19 episodes
Yeah it was
So I'm like that flew by
Because I was really really
Highly anticipating
White Album
And boy
Man do I fucking love
White Album
And it's overall everything
And the fact that they
They got back ago in there
As the voice actor
I really like
White Album
As a stand because it is
It is not a man
That stands around
And punches
Or does a thing
It's a complete
It's Iceman
Yeah
It's like you're fighting
Fucking Iceman from the X-Men
You know like
It's his armor
It's a whole
It's a ridiculously rad idea
Of coding yourself with it
The goofy fucking weirdos
That aren't punch ghosts
And are cool
And the fact that something
That strong and that good
And that like useful
Gets a name like White Album
And then it amplifies with
Gently weeps is like
Ah you're giving significance
To the things that matter
It's super cool
That's a really great like
This is the dividing line between
The chaff
Yeah
And the shit that matters
The only real problem I'd have
I have two problems
Part five
One got really bad in the last
Episode and I'm like
Cause we finally got Bruno's backstory
And I'm like
Get out of here Giorno
Get off the
Get out of the intro
Get out of this part
Who cares
Right
Right
You were a sad kid
And you didn't
Your dad was a fucking
Evil vampire
He has a dream
Shut up
Who cares
Drugs
Drugs are evil
And shot my dad
Yeah
That's awesome
Yeah
Surprisingly normal
Yeah
All things considered
Pretty normal backstory
A very real
Well not the murder part
But the very realistic
Will come by comparison
Backstory to every other person
Until the point where it's like
I am now going beyond
The point of no return
Yeah
I'm making a switch here
Until that one
Yeah
And the other part is
Oh man
These villains of the week
Are pretty tough
Good thing we killed them
So that we could stop them
From killing the guy
That we're planning to kill
Did you see
What
Like
It's the
Like could you imagine
If every character
That have fought them
At this point
All just teamed up
And attacked this guy
All at the same time
Did you see that fictional comic
Where Bruto is like
Here
Here she is
And then
The boss is like
Oh my God
It's my darling daughter
Thank you so much
I did see that
That's how part 5 should end
And it's just like
Oh I'm so happy
Stop selling drugs
Okay
What do you, yeah
I'll give you anything
Yeah
No problem
Drugs done
Fuck drugs
Yeah
Everything was fine
Oh man
Yeah JoJo's great
Everybody loves JoJo
Um
I also had
Not normally
This wouldn't be interesting enough
To come into
Even talking about this
This podcast
But I had somewhat of
A fascinating discussion
With a former member
Of the game industry
Over the weekend
Or Friday rather
Did you
I did
Did you, did you see
Any of this
Wolves
The wind's blue
But what happened
What happened
So let's go into
Some backstory
For those of you
Who may not be aware
Clifford Blazinski
Is a man
Who worked on
A ton of games
He worked on
Jazz Jackrabbit
I'm not personally
Familiar with
What his involvement
With Jazz Jackrabbit was
Worked as a level designer
On I think
A couple
Unreal tournament games
Which those games
Had great levels
And I believe
He was the creative director
For most
If not all of the first
Three Gears games
The good ones
At which point
He kind of catapulted
Into the limelight
And like
Look at me
I'm like a
Not like a war inspector
Or Kojima
But like a known director
Right?
Dude huge
Wants everyone to
Call him dude huge
Yeah, well he is
That part's weird
Cause I don't get it
Like I actually
Just don't get
The nickname at all
But
Kind of flamboyant
Kind of rock star
Type personality
Director thing
Showed up in that
Mega 64 video
With Kojima
That was great
Seemed like
A pretty
Normal guy
Maybe a little bro-ish
Whatever
Retire
Me quit
Or he retired
From Epic
And then made
A shit zillion dollars
Investing
Into Oculus
Because then
Oculus got bought
By Facebook
And the shares went high
So he got to be super rich
Good for you man
This was then
By him coming out of
Retirement
Which
If you've seen
The Crobecat video
About lawbreakers
In the interview
He gave
About coming out of
Retirement
The words were
I went to
Publishers
And said
I want to make
Another billion dollar
IP
Now that's
A pretty big
Fucking chip
On your shoulder
That's presumptuous
Right?
And then
Lawbreakers happen
Everybody knows
About lawbreakers
I think there's
One person playing it
Right now
I've also been informed
That
The podcast's
Listener peak
Is higher
Than lawbreakers
All-time peak
On Steam
Ever
As a
As a little
You know
Point of
Comparison there
And lawbreakers
Horribly failed
Which
You know
Sucked for everybody
Including Nexon
Who bankrolled it
And then came
Oh god
I fucking forgot the name of it
Would you believe it?
Radical Heights
Well you remember
Radical Heights?
Yeah
We did a video
Took a look at it
That video sucked
Because
The game's too boring
Like we didn't really
Have a whole lot to go on
On there
Other than the fact
That we were able to
Point out quite accurately
The only people in here
Playing
Are people making
Their own
Radical Heights videos
That was
A bad game
That was a
Trend chaser
That was a big
Waste of money
This was then
Followed by
Oh god
What was his name?
I think his name was
Mr. Le Joie
On Twitter saying
Don't worry guys
Female characters
Are coming to the game soon
And then
Seven minutes later
Cliffy P
Went on Twitter to go
Yeah
Companies dissolved
Boss key productions
Is no more
Radical Heights is dead
Everyone's fired
Okay goodbye
Ooh
Ah
No good
No good
Firing your company
Over Twitter
Not the best
It reminds me of
Do you see the Hard Times
Article about Reggie?
Which one?
Which
Game industry
Employees marvel
As person leaves
Job by choice
Ah
Yeah
Ah that sucks
Pretty funny headline
Ah
This was followed by
Ah
Mr. Buzinski talking about
How he never took a salary
When he worked on lawbreakers
So
You know
He's a good guy
And that he paid everyone
Months and months of severance
Which was immediately disputed
By employees going
No he didn't
Which
The reply was
Well I like to think I did
Which
Isn't
How money works
But okay
Fine
So
Over the weekend
Over the past couple months
Cliff has been very sad
Because no one cares
Anymore
No one pays attention to him
And it really looks
Like he's very upset
That when
Reggie retired
Everyone was like
Ah we're gonna miss you Reggie
You're the man
My body will always be ready
Etc
But no one paid him any attention
When he retired
Which is
He didn't actually retire
He lost his job
Because the company went under
And so I pointed out to him
He made a post that said
Everyone wants me to get back
Into the game business
And make video games again
But I'm like
Whatever
And he posted this
Funny screenshot of him
Chilling in like
90s
I don't know
Pop workout attire
I guess
I pointed out
Like no one's saying that
Cliffy
No one cares
It's not your fault
That you don't know how
To make games that people like
Anymore
Now that was my little
Aha I poked
Aha
Point
Poke fun at this
Guy
Very funny to me
Burn away
What ensued was not
What I expected
Particularly not from somebody
Who worked for a long time
In the games business
What ensued
I did not expect
What is
My genuine belief
To be Cliff
Blazinski's sock puppet account
To start harassing me
For hours because I was bald
Which good one
You got me
Um
And then when I blocked that account
And
The comment I made
Got more likes
Than Cliffy's original post
For Cliffy B himself
To wade in
And
Poke fun back
Using such great comebacks as
Well I don't have to work a day
In my life because I'm rich
Which seems
Tasteless and disgusting
Considering the primary complaint
Would have about someone's behavior
Being that they fired everyone
And didn't give a shit
At which point
When I pointed that out
Did you see the wedding photo man
Cause that's my favorite part
What was the wedding photo
When everyone in the world is saying
No Jackass
People are mad at you
Cause you fucked your employees over
He posted a photo of him
Hanging out at an employee wedding
Or a former employee wedding
Of Bosque employees
Literally going
Look, look, see
They don't hate me
Huh
Fuck
Fuck
I can't think of a single
Sadder thing in the world
That's like posting a picture
Of your fucking fake girlfriend
From Canada
That is like
Look, see
People don't hate me
Look, I'm there in the photo with them
Look, we're all smiling, see
There's so many things to unpack here
One
I'm just a fucking
Whoever streamer
Slash podcaster, right?
Z tier shit
Whatever
Right?
The dude's a fucking millionaire
What does he even care?
Like for real, what does he even care?
And two
Bro, that's a bad way to
And all I can think of
Is that the same kinds of things
That lead to
What's more important than everyone
Losing their jobs
Is that the games that I made
Failed and I'm sad about it
So please pity me on Twitter
For the past six months
Are that, oh no, my ego
And I went back and checked
Sure enough
The only slap backs against me came
Once mine passed his likes
Which meant that his ego would have been damaged
And all I can think of is like
Wow, Cliff Lisinski as a person
Slash developer has turned out to be
The exact person that I jokingly thought he was
Which is a man shoved up his own ass
And ego
Who cannot handle criticism
Despite being wealthy
And doesn't genuinely understand
Why people are upset
It's like
Making fun of people who work for a living
Is probably the most out of touch
Dick bag rich person thing you could possibly do
Because almost everybody has to work for a living
And people don't appreciate you making fun of that
But that's just me though
That fizzled out
It ended up like
Like, look I'm at Mardi Gras
What's the end of that
But just like, I don't know man
I really like those Gears of War games
And I hear jazz, drag, rabbits, fantastic
All I have to say is
As a gamer who has played
Gears of War 1
Yes
I'm a huge fan of that game
That game was very fun
I like the Hammer of Dawn
It's a cool weapon
I like General Ram
Yeah, he's a decent villain
I like the roadie run
Yeah, it's good
I felt it felt good to do the chainsaw bayonet
Yeah
I like Gears of War
This is a good game
That's a good game
That's a good game
Made by some good people
Yes
That's how I feel
I also
And this is where we get into
Who knows
But when you get into this kind of
Public spat
People come out of the woodwork
To tell you their stories
Right
And
You always have to take them with a grain of salt
Because they could just be fucking made up
But my favorite
Was somebody who
Wrote into my stream the other day
Who said that they met Cliffy at
Pax East, I think
When he was demoing Lawbreakers
And said that he was a big fan
And to thank him
Because the Gears series
Had helped him make a bunch of friends
Right
You know
Clan stuff
To which the reply came back
Like you should make some new friends with
Lawbreakers
That's pretty funny
Which is pretty funny
And
Like I hope it's real
Can't verify it
Right
Unverifiable
But even if
It's still pretty funny
That's a pretty funny thing to say
Let's get shit
Let's get shit
Yeah, I don't know
God seems like a fucking jackass
And you would expect better
Yeah
I thought there was an interesting
Account that I kinda wanted to
Just I was like
Oh, there's some fun posts happening here
I tried to follow
A theme team
That's funny
I was like
Oh, there's some fun posts happening here
But unfortunately that didn't last
So that's funny
Because a lot of people were asking me
Why you were following
Cliffy V sock puppet account
I just
I wanted
I saw some posts that I wanted
To find
I wanted more of that content
You know what
You know what the funniest thing in the world is
To me
It's like
You know what
Well, you have an active Twitter presence
I have an active Twitter presence
People talk shit
That's fine
That's part of the
That's part of the game
Right
But you know what's weird
When you
When somebody's talking shit
And it's just like
It's lame
It's not strong
And you click on their name
And you see that they've never made
A non-reply tweet
Ever
Ever
That they've got 35 posts
Since 2017
And 19 of them
Have a picture of your face in them
So that when you look at the left
You know, like the media snapshot
It's just your face
It's literally just
A picture of your face
Over and over and over and over
And you go
Mmm
Now
This seems like a real person
This seems
To be fair
Like this person's main Twitter account
To be fair
You're pretty fucking bald
I am
I'm pretty bald
And you do sit in your dungeon basement
I do sit in my dungeon basement
And you do stream
For lack of
Having
Any other job
That's correct
It is a pathetic existence
These are all
Yeah, it's accurate, yeah
That's true
Yeah
You good there, Willie?
You good?
You good?
How you doing?
I just wanted more content
That's all
You know my favorite part is
So
Cliff responded to me
Once the likes passed
The likes on his video
Sorry, on his comment
And I thought that was funny
But somebody pointed out to me
That Cliff's actual response to me personally
Came within like 10 minutes
Of me blocking theme team
Which
It's one of those things you can never
Ever, ever, ever, ever
Ever find out
Who's sock puppet is who's, right?
You have a suspicion, is that what you're saying?
But
That was about as
Suspicious as it gets
Really?
And the idea
That a long term
Game developer
At one time
Like
A big person in the industry
Would feel so
Insecure
As to go after this
You know what?
Let me put it to you this way
Alpha Gamboa
Had a really good post
Which was the equivalent of like
This is the equivalent
Of God coming down
From the heavens
And walking through the entire kingdom
To yell at Shrek in his swamp
Like, come on bro
Once again
As a gamer
As a gamer that appreciated
How awesome Gears of War was
I
Personally, I hope to see
Another game
Come from the man that made Gears of War
I think that would be really cool
I think he could make a good game
I would love to see another video game
Absolutely
I'm sad to hear that
Cliffy B doesn't want to make games anymore
I hope he makes more because
I really, really liked Gears of War
Well, here's the other thing, right?
Is this the kind of thing I always wonder
And if you've got good ideas
You've got good ideas
Is that when you see this kind of behavior
Even though it's not fair
They're not actually related
In my heart
I then have to start to wonder
How much of that stuff
That I liked
Was this person
Actually responsible for
Right?
So take a look at
Well, unreal, right?
Yeah
So, you know
Yeah
Yeah
You know what my biggest disappointment
About this whole Twitter kerfuffle is
At one point
Cliffy
Added ice tea
In this exchange
Saying one day
Sometimes you just got to go all
At final level on trolls
Which is a
Ice tea Twitter account
Ice tea Twitter account
This is the point
I think it was like Friday
At like 2 o'clock in the afternoon
I wasn't doing it
I was in my fucking pajamas
Where I'm like jumping up and down
Going, oh my god
Please, please, please
Please ice tea
Please
I want to fight ice tea today
My life will be
Like
Oh, he's too busy doing monologues
On SVU, man
Yeah, I know, I know
But like the idea
The idea, man
The body count is back
That, like, Twitter spat
Escalates to beef with the rap game
My all time dream
Then Coco gets involved
Yeah
Yeah, you can't take on body count
You can't take them on
Don't even fucking
Don't think about it for a second
When I was a little kid
I remember thinking
I want to get into a
Shitpost
280 character argument
With that guy on lawn order
If you could spend money
To boost tweets to make sure
To make sure that he sees it
Make sure, yeah, absolutely
Ice tea has to verify
A thousand fucking boosters
To just fucking kick that thing up
So it's unavoidable
It's the first thing on his phone
When he picks it up
Oh, man, what the fuck is this?
Oh, man
The other thing is, like
The way that got posted
Felt like they thought
They were, like, Cliffy thought
That him and Ice Tea were friends
Because they worked together on gears
I don't think that's the case
What a cool game, man
What a cool...
Gears of War 3 is a fucking great game
What a great game
I really should get around to it
Because I really only
Unfortunately played the first one
The first one's great
The second one's pretty good
The third one is fucking awesome
The third one's really, really good
Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool
Sure, for sure, for sure, for sure
Yeah
So that was a fun little adventure
That was a fun little Friday afternoon diversion
Social media
Social media is free
The world we live in
And sometimes it's terrible, but other times
But like
It gives you gifts you wouldn't otherwise be able to get
When ball basement dwelling trolls like you
Yes, right
Can actually reach up
And touch you
To creators
Yeah
And people that are making
And shaping the industry
You know
What a world, what a time to be alive
It's really...
It's a weird, it's a weird world
Because we have all sides of it
Let's take me as
Bald basement troll
That I am
You can range all the way from
Hey
Celebrated creator of this game
You seem like an idiot
Versus
Hey, Kira
Your cat, Jareth
Is very adorable
He looks like a pumpkin
Any direction
Any direction
I mean look
Like
What do you think
Like what if Plinkett's review
Was a series of tweets at George Lucas
Like the longest chain ever
Over the course of like three years
What happens then?
I don't know
That's the world we're heading for
That's amazing
And lots of...
Like it's not just games
It's every industry
Directors are on Twitter
Answering questions
Ryan Johnson is on there
You know
Talking to people that hated Star Wars
Like
That's weird
The idea of like a director
Or a creator of a thing
Whatever
You know, staff, right?
Going into social media posts
Of people going
Yo, that movie sucked
And going, no it didn't
That's fucking crazy
That's nuts
That's where we live, man
Somebody should tell Mike Yabara
That that is crazy
There is a...
You see that shit?
No
Oh my fucking god
Fucking VP of micro...
Fucking something
Mike Yabara, he's a Microsoft man
Fucking slamming PC gamer
Saying, I can't believe these
Terrible quote-unquote reviews
Players should just look at live streams
For the coverage of Anthem
Oh
By the way, Microsoft has a co-marketing deal
With Bioware and EA on Anthem
Okay
Was it Mixer specifically?
As a recommendation?
No, okay
It was not
See, that would have been too obvious
There was always...
And there still remains a...
There's a level of like...
You don't have access
You know, as a fan, as a viewer, as a consumer
You don't have access
And generally speaking
You probably shouldn't
You probably shouldn't
Yeah
All things considered
Because with access comes responsibility, I suppose
That's not gonna...
Come on
Why would that, you know
Yeah, man
Yeah
It's a fucking wild world we live in
Yeah
Especially one where you couldn't resist the temptation
To take the stick
Listen, dude
And just poke
No, for real though, if I would like to get serious
Uh...
Cliffy B's behavior
Since Radical Heights and Boss Key folded
Has been personally infuriating to me
Because every time
One of his social media posts would float up
Especially right after the studio closed
Like, I think two or three days after
The studio closed down
He had this thing of like, you know
It's tough, you know
It was basically weeks of like
Poor me, my game failed
I'm like, you're rich
Who cares
No one cares
People are out of work, Cliff
But you don't care
You just don't give a shit
And the timing right now is extra appropriate
What with the fucking layoffs at
Uh, EA and the fucking layoffs
Doesn't that wedding photo prove?
It proved
Oh my god
People pointed out to me all sorts of hidden tech
In that wedding photo
One
Hidden tech
Hidden tech
One
Cliffy is slightly off to the side
Are you going on a Photoshop conspiracy theory right now?
No, no, no, no, no
Because I'm
No, no, no, no, no
I'm not having it
I'm not
The word Photoshop will enter
But it will enter in the opposite way that you think
He's standing off just enough to the side
That you can Photoshop him out quite easily
Almost like
He ran into the photo
To be like, look, I'm here too
But more than that
The date on that wedding
Likely means that the invitations were sent out
Before everyone got fired
Why can't, it can't, it can't be Occam's razor
It can't just be a happily, happily photo
No
Proving
See, here's the thing
A happy relationship
It can't just be what it is
It's gotta be
So, if that was the case
It's gotta go under the microscope
Woolly, here's the thing
Normally I would agree with you
However, when somebody offers a photo like this
Unprompted
To go, look, people like me
Yes, it goes under the microscope
Because that's a weird thing to do
That is a weird fucking thing to do
That is weird
So, one, invites probably got sent out before the closure
And two, he's still the guy who would write your recommendation
As a point of contact for your CV
So, what are you gonna do?
You're gonna burble, just the guy who's
Throw your last boss on your CV
Which, to give you bad reviews
Didn't invite him your way
I'm just a gamer, man
What is it?
Trying to rise up
We're all trying to rise up, Woolly
With that
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So, I did have one last thing that I did with my week
I'm gonna send it quick
Yeah, you can send a quick little email
Yeah, okay
I'm gonna
I had one last thing that I did with my week
And it's a bizarre form of enjoyment
Because it is
Becoming more common lately
And that is video game Shadenfräude
I think is how you pronounce it
So, I have yet to play Anthem
I have no interest in Anthem
Anthem seems bad
However
Anthem's release has given me much joy
I have been having a fucking great time
Over the weekend
Talking to people about Anthem
Because would you believe
That parts of that game are so fucked up
As to be actually hilarious
To be very funny
To hear about and see
And see
I have seen all kinds of bugs
In terms of weird shit happening
And popping into the world
We talked briefly about the way it handles loading assets
In last time
And the fact that you could come in as a level two or three
Quick player and just join the final battle
So it's one of those things
Now let's be really clear
This is not Fallout 76
I don't think anything's gonna be Fallout 76
For a long fucking time
Yeah, it's gonna take a minute
But
This is definitely a larger shit show
Than say Mass Effect Andromeda
Which was its own bag of hilariousness
So
I've seen every bug
Under the sun coming out
I've seen
People psycho-crushing into space
By breaking loading screens and cut scenes
I've seen people fall through the world
And get permanently stuck
I'm seeing people having every kind
Enemies with no guns
Enemies shooting the floor
Enemies with their AI turned off
Enemies that are invincible, etc
But my favorite
Out of all
Somebody pointed me towards a tweet
That apparently this person follows me
A person named Erinchine
So
In Anthem your master work weapons
Which are the super weapons
Your exotics, what have you
Your uniques
Ah, the farmables
Yes, the one that you have to
Grind in game currency for dozens of hours
In order to roll on one, right?
Apparently
The end game weapons have roll
Randomly rolled stats
Now you don't play a lot of loot games
But I understand what that means
Destiny had this
It's like you can get a really
You can pick up multiple guns
And some will be better than others
Even though they're almost done
Yeah, this one has extra damage
Or this one has extra accuracy
For sure
So in Anthem
They're randomly rolled
With no top or bottom
To their stat limit apparently
So they can randomly roll zeros
So a legendary
So a master work
This is the fist of the crucible
Master work heavy assault launcher
I'm gonna point this to Wolves
So we can see that big fucking red bar
Which shows that the attack is garbage
But more fun than that
Is its special ability
It has a combo effect
Explosive
Victor's advantage
Defeating an enemy
Will increase flamethrower damage
By zero
For zero seconds
Stacks to zero
Okay
You have to
That had to be the result of like
Hitting that system up
Until you saw some nonsense
Can't be
Because you can't just
Get all those weapons
Now these are rare
But I heard there was a level
You could walk to
That you could load in and load out of
And basically keep farming the same thing
On hardest difficulty
I don't know about that
This person seems to have
Just gotten a drop
And the drop is literally zero
There was a tweet that said
Put it on hardest difficulty
Go to this area
Kill this one thing
It's not that hard
And then you will always get
A 20% or something
So that's wacky
So in addition
So Anthem has a lot of problems
But
So there's an entire like
So you got a legendary nothing
Yeah, there's an entire
Like little cabal of
What I would call warframe content people
They've all hit Anthem
Because it's a loot shooter
So that's that gang's
Oh, I hate that word
It's what it is
Oh, man
That rubs me the wrong way
It's what that is, Woolly
Oh, boy
Warframe division
Destiny, Anthem, et cetera
Right
But that whole cabal has hit Anthem
Right, because it's
You know, there's comparisons to
Warframe
In a loot shooter
The most important thing
Ever
Is that
Oh, I found a gun
Oh, I found a sword
Oh, cool
This thing kicks ass
I can use that to beat up
That harder thing, whatever
Or it's cool
Looking at least
Or it has a weird effect
You know, whatever
Right
Warframe has a bajillion guns
Some of them are really normal
A bunch of them are weird
Right
Destiny has its exotics
They all have some goofy gimmick to them
Stuff like that
Right
One of these warframe content people
Someone who I'm a big fan of
Quiet Shy
Was actually just talking to her
Earlier, she's very kind
But she put up a video
Look, this is my master work
Minigun
High-stamaging weapon type
In the game
Spits out a bajillion ammo, right?
On your harder difficulties
In Anthem
Your guns can't kill enemies
She expands about 80%
Of this thing's total magazine
To kill one enemy
Because your abilities
Your cooldowns
Yes
Those are exponentially more powerful
Yes
And the combo system
Where you freeze them and whatnot
And on the hardest difficulty
Enemies get 8,000%
Some, yeah
Stronger
Right
So, you know, you use your weapon combos, right?
But that means that in a loot shooter
The weakest part of your kit
Is the one that you're grinding for
That's stupid as fuck
That is stupid as fuck
So your incentive loop
Is essentially something you're not going to be using
Exactly
So why are you bothering?
Well, to get the cool weird ones
Problem is
Weapon types in Anthem are all the same
All the assault rifles work the same
They don't even fire differently
You get the legendary one
It might have a crazy effect
But that effect might be set to fucking zero
This game sucks
And it is fun to watch it suck
Just like how Fallout 76
Was hilarious to watch
It suck
Anthem is fun to watch it suck
And not only that
Look at what it's in between
Fallout 76 doesn't have cool flying
It doesn't
Well, sometimes it does
But not on purpose
Right
But look what it's in between
It's in between
Resident Evil
A plus, great game, right?
It's in between on the other end
Apex by the same company
And Division
Which the fucking private test for Division
Felt a million times better than anything
Than the full release of Anthem
And on the other other end
Is fucking Devil May Cry
Where was, what is this game supposed to do
And appeal to whom?
Loot shoot fans
But there's a better one coming in like
Two weeks, three weeks
Sounds easily patchable
It does not
Number changing
This seem, okay
Numbers going up and numbers going down
You literally enter the key
Numpad into the, into the
Okay, I was getting pissy for a second
And then you start, you keep going
I'm like, okay, you're doing that thing
As somebody who has played a bunch of these
Types of games
Sluders
Fuck
Alright, you've ruined it for me too now
So good job
So as somebody who has played a bunch of
Sluders
And somebody who has played a bunch of games
Upon release
That were fucked up, right?
Warframe was fucked up
When it came out
Destiny was fucked up when it came out
Mass Effect Andromeda was
Fucked up when it came out
Now
It takes a long
Time
To fix these things
In a live game
It takes a long
God damn time
So simply removing
The threshold so that
It can't hit zero
On your legendaries
I saw people talking
That the reason why that's possible
Is that the stacks
Accidentally went too high
Sometimes
So they might have nerfed all of those
Types to zero
Until they fixed it later
Which is an even stupider solution
If it's RNG, it's RNG, right?
So the idea that you could just like
You know, squeeze that variable down
And then
Make the guns do damage again
Sounds like numbers
So in a loot shooter
The one thing that
You look at
I think Warframe is probably the best example
Nobody gets mad when you buff the game
Nobody gets mad when you buff the player character
Okay
Hey, people find out that this
This thing is like super fucked up
And broken and super good
Nobody gets mad
If you leave it in
Right, ever
Not unless it's PvP
If there's PvP, that's different
In any genre, honestly
Funbugs, people want to keep those
Like you look at
The movement thing, that was a bug
And they're like, oh, that's cool, let's integrate
But like, hey, this gun does too much damage
Yeah, okay, you got lucky, good for you
Right?
But it's this thing of like
Nerf the
Powerful stuff
But don't buff the shitty stuff
Like Destiny's a pretty good example
It took a long
Time, it took a year plus
For Destiny 1 and Destiny 2
To
Work themselves up
Into a better state, right?
I'm not a developer
And I don't know anything about development
Other than what people tell me, right?
But it seems fairly clear
That working on a game when it's not live
Is a lot more efficient than working on a game
When it is live
And it can take
It takes a long fucking time
To fix stuff like this
It will take
Over a year
At least
Just to fix the stuff we're talking about
Right now
Let alone
Anything new
That happens in the future
And that doesn't change all sorts of problems with that game
Have you played it?
Look, I can't speak for the genre
But I can't speak for rolling balance changes
On live
Live services
On live services
That's right
And
You can make drastic
Reworks
You can
You just have to be committed to
Like
You have to be committed to
Like extending the project
Longer than you thought
You would in the
Tail end of it
In case
There surely will be
The new issues arise from
The hotfix
And then you have to have the QA team ready on that
And then ready on that
And then eventually you slowly tail end it
Here's the issue that I've seen it done
That I see with that, right?
When Warframe came out fucked up
It kind of got a pass from a lot of people
Because Digital Extremes is an indie company
And when Warframe came out
They were on the verge of bankruptcy
And it was also free
It is also free
Which helps
When Destiny came out
It came out from a AAA developer
Bungie
From a AAA publisher
And thus got a lot of fucking heavy fire
For why does the story make no fucking sense
Why is grinding for materials in this game the worst thing ever
Etc.
And then that happened again with Destiny 2
Of like why are we doing the same fucking thing we did with Destiny 1
Right?
We put out Anthem
Which apparently has been worked on and off
To some degree for 6 years
And it feels like it kicked out the door a year early
That
Does not inspire
Confidence
In terms of the long
Tail and support
And what have you
However, and this is now my favorite
Awful lie in this business
There's a 10 year plan for Anthem
Did you know that?
I've heard that before
I heard that with Destiny
From Activision
By the way, Activision and Bungie
Not even working together anymore
For the record
Hasn't been 10 years since Destiny 1
True they separated
Hell yeah they did
But there's a 10 year plan for Anthem
You know what game had a 10 year fucking plan
For all the Warcraft
We're on year fucking 14
15 now
Shenmue
Yeah, Shenmue
I um
I
Oh sitting over here
Hope that the
Shortcomings don't spell
An aversion to anyone else
That's willing to pick up the mantle
Of letting
Me Iron Man
And customize my Iron Man
I don't think that is a worry
What I do worry is that
Because there's been nothing really
Doing that
For some time now
So this came along and does it
Do you, okay
I feel like every 2 or 3 years
Mean you have the exact same conversation
And we've had multiple of them on this podcast
Right
Man Street Fighter 2 is really hot
We should make a Street Fighter 2 clone
Yeah it's garbage
But maybe it'll do well
Man modern
Military shooters are really hot
We should make a Call of Duty clone
Yeah it's garbage but
Maybe it'll do well
Man MMOs are really hot
Maybe we should make them MMO
Maybe okay but it's garbage
Yeah but maybe this one will do really well
Man MOBAs are really hot
Maybe we should make one
Yeah but it's garbage
Man Battle Royale is really hot
And in between those last 2 was
Wow
These
Games as a service
Shooters
Are really hot
And that's the weirdest one
Because no they aren't and they never were
This
Anthem
And Division
Feel like responses
To how successful
Everyone thought Destiny was going to be
Okay
Because they didn't want to be late to the party
Like they always are
But then Destiny was not as successful
As anyone thought it was going to be
And hell no Destiny 2 wasn't
Okay but before Destiny
What was your Schluter
Borderlands
And Borderlands was a weird
Offshoot of Diablo
And there are Diablo clones
And guess what
A bunch of Diablo clones are really
Really fantastic
Torchlight is great
Path of Exile is great
Grim Dawn is apparently pretty good
Balders
No totally different series
Totally different kind of game
Think of Kotor
Diablo
Got a huge
The only thing that's the same as the perspective
But Borderlands is Diablo with guns
And the Destiny was supposed to be Borderlands
But Halo
It's a bandwagon that wasn't
Actually all that popular and everyone fucked it up
And they bought it and then this is where we're at
Division seems fine
There are parts of that game that are fucked up
But it's like they continued
Existence and success of Warframe
Will always provide a frame of reference
For what you want to accomplish
Yeah but Warframe's only been really successful
For like two years, three years
But it's been around for so long
Yeah because it's fucking free
And that's the trick
Like if Anthem was fucking
Free right now
This shit would be light hearted
It would not be
Vindic like I'm laughing
Out of spite
In a mean way
If this game was free I'd be playing it right now
For shits and giggles
And I'd be like wow this is really fucked up
Hope they patch it
Maybe I'll come back in a couple months after they put it back
Because it's free
Not having to put your 60
Because you put your 60 bucks or you're fucking
89 whatever the fuck it is out here
Now
And it's fucked up like a free to play game
That sucks
The weird thing is
Sitting
In a place where
Like the perspective now feels
Just based on the genre and it's direct competitors
That it's like this project
This product is now gated
Behind a paywall
Even though it's like
You're selling a video game
And I would never be the one to be on the side of
Like why isn't this game free
Why is this game buy to play
Why is this game B2P
That's a horrible place
I hate it
It's uncomfortable
Let me try and dive
Even deeper to that
Because there's this weird thing
That nobody really notices
And it applies to all the examples
That I've talked about
Street Fighter, Call of Duty
World of Warcraft, Dota and League
Ok
It doesn't apply to PUBG
Because PUBG fucked up
But let's take Street Fighter
That shit is
What, fucking 92?
90, I mean fucking 91
Alright
We're gonna make a fucking Street Fighter clone
Alright
How many characters we got
8, great
We can beat Street Fighter
They have 12 now
Yes
Alright
We can beat Street Fighter
We have good sprites
And our game moves a little faster
It's gonna come out and it's gonna beat
Hyper Fighting came out
It's actually way faster than everything on the market
Our game looks super fucking slow now
Well that's okay
We're gonna make a fatal fury
Whatever
And it's gonna come out and it's gonna make Street Fighter
We're gonna have more characters
Super Turbo came out
And it has supers
And there's even more characters now
The fucking shit is crazy
It still costs 50 cents per game
And the crowd is still around this machine
Because they've been around this machine
For the last 10 years
When you're chasing the trend
You end up in this thing
Or the situation is inherently unfair
Every MMO that came out after World of Warcraft
Specifically
Ones that came out after 2006
When Burning Crusade came out
Had to deal with the fact
That they didn't have as much shit in their game that WoW did
Because WoW had an expansion
Right?
And you go, well is it better than WoW?
Not right now
Does it have as much stuff as WoW?
Not right now
Why the fuck would I play that instead of WoW?
You always have to...
Because you can only make so much games
Because it's got a booming speaker and fatalities
And digitized actors and blood
Because it's different
Right? Yep
You can only compete with something directly
So fairly
You can only make so much shit
Right?
And I can immediately see it
It's like
When fucking Anthem started its pre-production
Destiny probably wasn't even out yet
Let alone Warframe rising
From its fucking ashes, right?
So like, okay, well Destiny's gonna have this
This will compete with that, right?
But that's not what you're competing with
You're competing with the Destiny 2
And its expansions that exist now
You're competing with Warframe
That has been built up over fucking six years
You're competing with whatever, right?
Is that fair?
No
Too bad
That's the price you pay for getting in later
You have to, like...
Look, like, look at the...
You look at the leader
You look at League of Legends, right?
Most played game ever
Okay, we're gonna start a new MOBA
New MOBA's gonna have 20 characters
That's pretty good
How many fucking characters does League have right now?
A billion?
Is it over a hundred?
It's a billion
Okay?
Yeah
Well, shit, this game doesn't have as many characters as League
Is that fair?
A fucking course!
It's not fucking fair!
Does anyone give a shit?
No!
Who gives a shit?
That game has more!
Apex manages to be...
Different enough
Because you're using teams
And also, it's just a lot better
Than some of its direct competitors
Even if it was one versus a hundred
It would be...
It feels better
It would be a huge difference, yeah
But the shake-up in involving teams
And bringing back some of that overwatch
It's better and it's different
And whatnot, yeah
Anthem wants to...
Because Anthem probably looked at Destiny
As its core inspiration
Okay
And then said, you can't fucking fly in Destiny
But the...
Yes, yes
But you also have to look at the individual
Bioware timeline of
We need to swerve off of what the fuck we were just making
Yeah
Into something completely new
And what do we got?
What can we do?
What's hot?
What's hot?
And what can we do?
Sluders are gonna be the next big hot
Because
As we talked about Radical Heights
Before
And other examples of this
Where you're like, the studio needs to swerve
Into a completely different direction
In the hopes that it'll catch on it this way
You know
To some degree, Apex, man
You know?
Yeah
And that was a...
I wouldn't call that a swerve
For a respawn, I'd call that a pivot
Because it still feels like a fucking respawn
It is, yeah
Alright
Alright, yeah
Enough of the bonuses there
It feels like they took a shot of Halo
And then they fucking battle-reald it
The most...
The most mass-effect bones you'll see
In Anthem is dialogue trees
You mean the one or the other dialogue trees
That mean absolutely fuck all?
Yeah
Those ones?
Yes, those ones
So Bioware is fascinating
Because it's like, oh, we gotta swerve to something
I don't know
How about swerving towards...
RPGs?
They tried
And they weren't allowed to
Well, that's a whole different problem, isn't it?
Yeah, it was
And also, even if they did swerve back towards RPGs
The people who made those
There is more bio...
You know what Plague's post about how to put air quotes
Around developers when people leave?
Yes
Modern-day obsidian is more closely related
To the Bioware you probably have in your head
Than Bioware is
There are more people at obsidian
That worked on Baldur's Gate
And Icewind Dale and shit like that
Than there are at Bioware
Mass Effect?
No
There's still a ton of Mass Effect people there, I'm sure
But like...
Those people aren't there
Fuck the lead developer
The fucking director of Dragon Age 1
Quit the company when he saw what Dragon Age 2 was gonna be
And he was right
So your new activity consists of
Jumping on board the train
And seeing where it's going
Yeah, I love it
More like...
I give somebody a video camera to go on the train for me
Yeah, or I was gonna say
Like you just get in the back with the hobos
Doing the fucking train hopping
Like you're not actually buying a ticket
No
No
Anthem bums me out
So I've been saying
Bioware's probably gonna cease to exist
When the Anthem development
What do you even call it?
Like the fucking...
Develop the cycle
The cycle and the roadmap
And people are like
Yeah, but Dragon Age 4
Like Dragon Age 4 isn't gonna come out guys
That game is...
No, that's not gonna happen
I don't...
At this point I don't for a second
Believe that Dragon Age 4 will come out
And this is kind of a weird catch 22
Cause I'm wrong a lot
But on the ones that are more likely to depress you
I end up being right more often than not
And this is pretty depressing
How'd you fuck up a Mass Effect game, man?
Those games are awesome
I think it's as simple as more time in the oven was needed
But it was not allowed
That seems to be...
Every interview...
But that's how you fuck it up though
Every interview that comes out about Apex Legends
Is like yeah, EA didn't even look at us
When we were developing Apex
They didn't give a shit
And I assume it's because they thought that whatever the fuck
Respawn put out would fail
And they would just absorb Respawn employees into the battlefield
Monster or whatever
Six years
Six years
That's a very long time
That's a very long time
So you know, ever since the 360 era
HD era, blah blah blah
Game development time
That number is not real
It's real
No, it's real, but it's not real
In the sense that I promise you
That
I've seen this way too many times
That number
Has a restart point in it
Yes, it does, it might have two
I want to say possibly two
Because
I suspect there are two
Dead anthems
That we don't see
Even if a game
Has a six year development
And comes out being shit
There's a level of six
Six years of polish still shows
In places
You will see it
This type of thing
Absolutely looks like you're looking at a
Staggered and chopped six year timeline
And this was rebooted at some point
Actually go into this a little more in detail
So this has been happening more and more
And more and more
Which is games that come out
And they're like, this game's been under development
For five to
Ten years
Let's use Anthem and Final Fantasy 15
As examples
Right?
You play them
And the first word in your mouth is
Bullshit
You worked on this for ten years
Bullshit
You worked on this for five
Two human
Pre-production
And art assets
And concept art
Nine years ago
Six years, whatever
Every single one of those got fucking thrown out
We had a vertical slice
It got shared
It's not sent around, everyone saw it
We blew a year on a vertical slice
That management said was garbage
So complete restart
Because when a game comes out
And it looks like Anthem
It can't
Have been under development for six years
No, that's impossible
Twenty-four months ago
Something happened
And was like
It should be pointed out
That's the type of thing that happens
Both Destiny games
Were essentially made in one year
Despite coming out
Three years apart
They've been very clear in interviews
That like
Shit got broken
And had to be totally rebooted
For Destiny 1
So the game got rushed
And then they did the exact same
Fucking thing again
For Destiny 2
And I promise you as well
There's always a third conversation
And that third conversation
Is
Fuck
I think we gotta do it again
And then they look
And then they make sense of emails
And some calls are made
And then they come back and they go
Absolutely not
This is fucked up
You're not gonna get another two years on this
Can't do it, nope
Then it comes and it is what it is
Yep
There's always a third call
That guaranteed
Happened to Destiny 2
And that is me saying that
On my own like faith
Because the original
Planets in Destiny 1
Were supposed to be in Destiny 2
Were supposed to be that thing where
New game, okay here's all the old areas too
But because they had to fucking kneecap
The dev team halfway through
Got to cut all that
Well fuck
That's a pretty big fucking deal isn't it
And then the guy on the phone goes
Absolutely not, it ships it's got a ship
Fucking ship it, that's it
And hangs that phone up and picks this one up
And goes yo respawn what's up
What you got
What you looking at
We can totally ship
And then we create our fictional
Fucking timeline
Hypothetical
Everything about the fucking Apex feels
Like it got kicked out
Apex feels like a game that never got restarted
Exactly what the fuck they were doing from day one
And it got kicked out a month early
But we know for a fact that
They said there was a pivot
We know for a fact there was
And then you look at shit like
Wraith's fucking face
And you're like there's no way that was fucking final
There's no fucking way
Yeah
I think the Wraith costume
Is the single most common costume I've seen
Because it covers her fucking face
The fucking medic one
Okay
Covers her face from the nose down
Fixes that character right up
I thought I was looking at a bug when
Her hair didn't load in
I was like no no that's actually an outfit
But why does it look like it's like
The asset's missing
She looks unfinished
Anyway
Cool
That's a long rant
But yeah Anthem is like fucked up
And then I get sad way
Do you really
I really love a lot of Bioware games
But that
Company doesn't
Game dev is weird right
So say you look at fucking
It was a yes or no question
Yeah I know
But look at Spike Lee
I don't wanna
Exactly
Hey man I really like this Spike Lee movie
Then Spike Lee went crazy
He got an Oscar
Stuff like that
But in game dev it's like oh man I love Bioware
Which Bioware, this Bioware
Has these people in it
Or the Bioware name
Which has these people in it
Because it's all nebulous and fucking weird
What's up with you man
Well
Sure
So I guess
Please tell me it's all been playing Anthem
I did a couple things
I'm not gonna talk much about Apex and Tetris
They're the shit but you know what they are guys
I'm sinking time into them and that's the end of that
I like Mirage he's cool
I
Happened to get into a game where
Both me
JJ and Taffo
All were in the same fucking
Top list at the same time
It was pretty sick, that's nuts
And
Shout out to JJ for crushing it
Tetris 99 beast
Super cool
She has a proper fiend right
Oh yeah one of them
One of them secret
The ones that you're warned about
That you never knew you know like secretly
Like oh yeah I know I've been crushing Tetris
All these years I've been waiting for this moment
It's my time to shine
So
Yeah I guess I'll say one
Did the Tetris fall
Did the Titanfall 2
Community night and
We had a blast
On Origin
Those numbers shot up for that night
We got a whole lot of people hanging out
In the network and
Played some matches and
Man god
I just miss
The flow of the game
It's the funnest loop
It's the funnest game loop I think
In any
Shooter that I've ever played and I don't play a lot of them
No not yet Bungie
Said that the trick to game development
Is figure out a fun 30 seconds
That you can trick players into doing over and over
Right
You feel awesome
Jumping out of your Titan
Which is a failure
But then you feel even more awesome when you land
On that other guy's time
And then you get to call yours back down
Which is the like
Calling your Titan in is not only an event
It's a super
It's a drop
It's an ult
It's an ult
And you get to fucking
Play this higher level
Battle while you know
It's just such a fun
And then all the other players turn into fucking
Pions
And if you're the first Titan on the field
Then like you gotta
You can start just wrecking house
But also everyone's little ants
And you gotta squash the ants
And then when both teams get
Titaned up it's a whole thing
Fun, you know
And the entire night
Like if you go back and you watched it
I was garbage
I was the bottom of the list in almost every single game I played
Yeah, whatever, me too when I played it
It was so much fun
Man, I have so much room in my heart
For that game
What's your favorite Titan again? Legion
So I'm fucking
Scorch
That's a good one too
Put the gas down, light it up
Scorch being way too good
And then they nerfed him
And I was like I don't even care
I don't even care
And we're all just like
My boy's dropping in
And he's got the goddamn
Giant gun
I want my heavy arms gun and I'm gonna use it
That's why you like Legion
Oh god
It's a big fucking gun
And it just keeps fucking
Going
So we played
Some of the newer maps that came out
After I stopped playing
Including the training room map
Is now a map to play against
Everybody in
The gauntlet is a room
You can fight in and it's amazing
That sounds cool
Because you're always on the wall
There is no time to hit the floor
You are on the wall the whole time
Every gunfight is in
Midair, every single one
The double jump
The fucking grapple
The stim
Just wow
And I just really gotta get
You enjoy playing with the future
Abilities that will be turned into characters
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly
The skeleton is dead
I went back and looked at all the tacticals
In Titanfall 2 and I'm like oh that's a character
That's a character
Absolutely
I think I'm gonna
What I really do need to do is go
And actually get the hang of bunnyhopping for real
Because I was not doing any of that
And that's a huge difference as well
But yeah, just having
A really good time
Playing matches
With the network
There's an issue in terms of
The best way to queue up
With a lot of people
And it's tricky to
Play together
Because I was trying to play with Skull
You have to either invite the whole network and then kick one
Out but you can't really kick people
Or queue up at the same time
And count it down
So it wasn't really made for hey you and me make a room
And then we can invite the network afterwards
You couldn't do that unfortunately and that sucked
But all that to say that
You know I was feeling
Comfy with my alternator
Doing my thing and then
Got a recommend to be like why don't you switch to the Ava 8
Why don't you
Why not shotgun it
Oh I don't know I sucked last time I tried it out
But okay and then it started working out
And I was like oh fuck
And then someone was like why don't you try L starring it
And I was like okay that's the
I don't know I never really and then I tried
Picked it into work and I was like oh yeah
You know and I got my one moment
I got a one moment right before the end of the streamer
I was like yeah I got like three kills
Right there and like almost working on a fourth
Because we were doing different game modes and we did like
Part port capture and stuff
The number one thing
We had a really good time thanks to anyone that
Tuned in and played
The number one thing I heard the entire time was
Fuck I'm a PS4 player
I don't have it on PC sorry
PS4 version was more popular
I think it is actually still the most populated version
And
That happened so much that
Uh
I'm like you know I guess I kind of have to
Do another one
You just gonna have to
I think I just have to do a PS4 night
Don't have a PS4 progress on lock
Yeah so you'd be a generic
You know what I mean so that so I mean
I'm gonna maybe go and just do some just to get some stuff
But like
That's one of the biggest hindrances
But like there was more people
Going oh fuck I have it only
I only have on a PS4 then there were people going fuck yeah
I'm waiting and that's a huge sign
That's a bummer
So I think there's no choice really there
You know my friends
Like dude you haven't done that
For like you haven't gone back to play fighting games
On other platforms like and I'm like yeah
I guess but in this case it's kind of special
Because we're trying to resurrect the dead a little bit
I mean Titanfall is the best fighting game of all time
I don't know if you know that
So it's different
I won't argue
Yeah sure it's a stupid
Statement how could you argue
Uh
So yeah that happened that was a great time
I just I will say that
Switching back to apex later that same night
Oh it's slow
I was like why
I want that double jump
Well you know but it's gonna happen every time
It's possible that octane
Or profit
Will give you your double jump
Or
Your don't forget about
Float while you ADS in midair
Yeah that too
That's an ability though in apex
That would seem like a really good way
To get yourself killed instantly
Agreed
Sounds like a way to get killed
But nonetheless
The rate at which people die in Titanfall
Is really important
Oh it's like a fucking blank
So that's a fucking great time
Gotta go back in there that's what I did
Excuse me I'm just gonna get up and
Grab some energy
Sure
I also
Excuse me I took a quick look
At uh Travis strikes again
I don't know if you took
If you checked that out at all
No more heroes
2.5
Not really
Took a look
I looked at
A video of it
Okay and when is this
Seriously the whole game
Yeah that's how I feel about that
So uh I
Played just the beginning
And uh
I got a very very
Like I had a really huge
Suspicion that
This was going to be
A very pseudo feeling
Experience in the sense that
You are
Frothing to get to the next cutscene
Because these cutscenes are gonna be incredible
And this plot
Is gonna be through the roof
But this gameplay is gonna
Really slow you down
At times
And yeah
I will say that's kind of
The impression I got
The problem is that within the time frame
That I played which is really just the beginning
I can't give an accurate
Statement on that because I know
That you're playing on a console that's a death drive
And it's gonna switch up
To you know what I mean
Like you're gonna switch up games
The whole thing about playing multiple games
And getting stuck in the console
But
The
Introduction of everything and like the fact
That they're bringing in all these franchises
Into what I'm gonna call the
Sudaverse is kind of nuts and cool
You can see the ridiculous like
What like they spent the time
And the money making these crazy action cutscenes
And whatnot
Go places
But your gameplay
Is really
Arcady and
Xbox Livey
Xbox Live Arcady even
And
By the end of that
First hour and then that boss fight
It's kind of like
Okay
So
Yeah
So that seems like the biggest issue is kind of
Just like there's not
Like the one thing that would save it
Would be enemy variety
And by the point we got through
There wasn't a ton of enemy variety
I hope later on
In the game it really really
Mixes things up because gameplay
Is gonna be really on the stagnant side
While
You're getting rewarded with these awesome cutscenes
And tie-ins and story
You know
And I saw there was a video out there
So it's subspace emissary
Yeah
There was a video out there of
Already someone's hour
Long analysis breakdown of
What this plot means
Because No More Heroes always
Has a subtext
And then a subtext to the subtext
And in this case
There is that
It's been confirmed to be present
However, you have to get through
The fact that you just described it
As levels
That you have to get through
That sucks
That sucks to hear
So
In it also
The other thing too is that I hear that this is
An important chapter
In the Travis Touchdown saga
Shut up
And that it actually matters
In that way
I do
And there's crazy secrets
To unlock and find out
Sure
But if the meat and your meat and potatoes
Ain't no good
Yeah
It's only so much cheese you can put on those potatoes
Yeah, it seems like
It seems a bit odd to skimp on the
The gameplay as opposed to the
The cutscenes, you know
But anyway, that's kind of the brief impression
I got from playing it
Ever so shortly
But that was a video as well that's going to pop up on Woolly vs.
A little bit
I went to go see Alita
Battle Angel last night
Faced like an angel
But a body built for battle
Uh-huh
I don't know if you are familiar
Nope
The first thing I ever heard about Alita
Battle Angel was
James Cameron keeps talking about
How he wants to make a battle angel movie
For decades
That's literally the first thing I heard
Okay, so
The year is
Must have been 2000
I'm in high school
And I catch wind that
Battle Angel Alita
A.K.A. Gunnam
A.K.A. Galli is getting
Uh
A film, a Hollywood adaptation
And a film
A film
Alongside Ghost in the Shell
What?
And I was like this world is fucking crazy
Five years after
That shit had just hit us
And your brain is going that's so exciting
Fast forward
15 to 20 years
Yeah
And those things go through
Whatever form of development hell they go through
But to be fair, Cameron
Has a fucking
He has a habit of
Calling things, he points at
Signs that are like 30 years down
The line where he might not be around anymore
I just want to point out
That every single day
I thank our lord and savior Jesus Christ
In the morning that that
Akira adaptation is still dead
Yes, yes
Uh, that
I will not abide
Steven Spielberg's name attached to Ghost in the Shell
Was a cause for celebration back
In high school
Things changed
We all waited around for Alita
And we finally got to see
That big eye trailer
And it was in Robert Rodriguez's hands
You're like that's a weird one, but okay
Trouble maker studios
Planet terror
Let's see what you got
Sin City, etc
And I got to say
It's a fun movie
I've been hearing good things about it all weekend
It is not perfect
It's fun
In comparison that anyone would make
With like the fact that like that and Ghost in the Shell
Were announced around the same time
And they're both about
These cyber brain girl
Protagonist in a
Future tech
Cyberpunk world and all that stuff
Alita is not philosophical at all
In the Ghost in the Shell way
So don't expect that
Source material wise
It's a manga that's been around for a while
I only read a couple chapters of it
I never made it through the books
So I was coming into this
Mostly cold
With a couple of chapters of reference
From the beginning
Now
Yeah, it
The eye thing
You get used to it
It manages to normalize
Apparently they toned it down
I don't know if they toned it down
I don't know if they toned it down
It's what I'll say
Because it still feels weird at first
And then you go through it and you're like
Yeah, this is fine
Well, there's
Reasons
She's from another place
Ah, fuck it
She's from the mangaverse
Big eyes, small mouth
That's how they do it
I like how you said that
They
Yeah, that parts
The
Overall
I would say that it's fun
Actions fucking solid doing what it does
I went in with two
Expectations
Or two demands, I should say
I wanted to see
A cannon drill
And I wanted to see a cannon spike
I should back up
Are you familiar with
The Street Fighter named Kami?
Yeah, I am
Yes, the cannon drill is a low
Twisting, like kind of torpedo
And a cannon spike
Is a kick variant
Of a shoryuken
It looks
It launches in the air with that kick
It looks like it hurt
And her wall bouncing
Maximus Spider Super
Killer B combination
I'm familiar with these things
Her moves are 100%
Panels directly from
Battle Angel Alita
Cool, the inspiration of her character
There's artwork
Of her that is identical
To a pose
From early on
Battle Angel Alita
Kami's eyes are
Actually really big in Street Fighter 2
Pretty much, and she's got the
Pouty lips in that one art with the scar
She's 100% inspired
That's where she came from
The fact that she has her dog tag
Says like C-A-M-M
And whatnot
There's a lot of that
Her fighting style is basically panzer kunst
It's what she uses in
100%
You want to find out more
You can head on down to I don't know if it's still around
But KamiFan.com
Has a full on breakdown of the panel by panel
Comparisons of her moves
I wanted to see those Kami moves
Not only are they in there
But all the other
Really awesome shit is in there
And these dope ass fighting game
Moves get used
To great efficiency
What you're saying is you went to see the movie
And you saw some anime shit on the screen
I did, I did
Problems
One, there is a lot of plot
That has to happen in a short amount of time
Therefore pacing
Is really fast
If not uncomfortable at times
However alongside breakneck speed
Pacing comes a need
To care about characters
More than you've had
Time to adjust to them
So you're kind of
You're given very quick pacing
And then you're very quickly given soft
Music to relate
And have moments with people that you're like
I don't know you
On a scale
Of breaking bad at the bottom
And fox
Spider-man cartoon
At the top
Where does this fit in pacing wise
This is
This is a
7.5
To 8
That's pretty fucking fast
As close to fox spider-man cartoon
That's crazy
Now some of it
You can chalk up to the fact that
The main character you're following
Is also
Waking up and having their first memories
So
You know how high school drama is the most important thing
In the world to kids in high school
The moment you get out of high school who gives a fuck
And you're like oh if I only had the perspective
To know how much life did matter
But you literally can't
Because when you're in high school
That's a third of your life
That shit that happened on the playground
That happened and that represents
That beef represents 50%
Of your existence
So with that
With that
Okay this robot doesn't have
A whole lot of time as a reference point
Therefore
Things are going to be amplified
Because how could you possibly understand
The greater context here
Also robot yes
You can chalk that up a little bit
And for the most part they do give
Reasons for
Some of the questions in the accelerated
Plot and pace
They give explanations for
Them including there's a moment of just talk
Where I'm like just talk
And the characters are like
No it doesn't matter though and you're like okay
Alright fine it doesn't matter
But
Here's what I'm going to warn and put out there
So pacing is really really fast
And uncomfortable at times
Main
Supporting character
Character goes by the name of Hugo
Okay
Oh
God
So you've got
Now
Are you talking about the character that's played by Christoph Waltz?
No because Christoph Waltz
Guess what he's doing
He's being Christoph Waltz
I fucking love Christoph Waltz
And Mahershala Ali
Guess what he's doing
He's fucking doing it
He's being Mahershala Ali
The
Fast is all
Like they're acting and doing their thing
And being the characters
And they're being great
And this fucking kid
Oh it's the fucking guy with the motorcycle
This kid
Rolls up
Into the fucking story
Right off of the set
Of Degrassi
And he starts acting
Like student bodies boyfriend
He starts acting like
A quarterback in a Disney show
I hate this
And he's tucking his hair
And he's like hey
Let me show you something
And you're like this dude
Fucking sucks
And not only does he suck as a character
He sucks unfortunately as an actor
He's doing a bad job
And everyone around him
Is crushing it
That's really awful
It sucks because he's so important
But the world
Is like doing their jobs
And he's barely hanging on
It was really rough
You know?
I really
It made it hard
It made it very hard
Because like you know
She has a human connection
That she's trying to make and what not
And this fucking dude
Just can't keep up with these delivering lines
Like you're watching them on
TV or Disney afternoon
And you're just like
Enough of this
And then his actions as a character also suck
Oh wow
So it's all really terrible
Would you describe this character
Slash actor as a
Blemish on the film
It's
My low point
Certainly
And the
And the things that he does
Are like
You're a dumb teenager
But it's the combination
Of doing those things while being
A bad actor
That makes me go fuck this kid
The whole time
It's one of those things
You're watching stranger things
And the kids are being stupid
But the kids are all A plus actors
You're like sure fuck it
They're like 10
You're stupid shit like that
That's totally normal
So
I gotta give props to this
For cramming
Despite the breakneck speed pacing
They cram a lot of story
And a lot of
Plot and things
There's a lot to carry
And they manage to do a decent job
Hinting at what they need to
And setting things up in a way
One of the early things I heard
Was the fact that
It's a cyberpunk story
That
At first can't decide
Whether it's about action and fighting
Or whether it's about sports
What? And then it ends up
Kind of doing sports
For a while
And then switches over to fighting
What sport? Yeah
There's a cyberpunk
Roller derby
I didn't get that impression
It's really important
What? It's a huge part
Of the story
There's sports
And they're big future cybersports
And they're the reason why
All these rad
Combat things exist
On people
And it's like
It works
They set it up and they do it
In a manga sense you're like
What do you want to be?
What do you want to be?
And in this case they find a way
To marry them and make it work
Do you want to be sliced off life or murder mystery?
So all that is done really well
And again
The
You've never seen more CG
Everywhere
Since Avatar 1
Right? Great
But a lot of it is done
Really well
And a lot of it is
Looking at it going
Is it? No
No that works
There's a couple of moments in the trailer
Where you see a normal person
And then they open up their jacket
And then the f**king parts just come out
Those moments
And you look at it and you go
But then as soon as
You're like is the camera going to start blurring and moving quickly
And it's like no it focuses on
The parts
And you can see them doing their thing
All in all
Go see it
It's fun
It's kind of dumb
She's charming
She's a really lovable character
Kristoff Waltz is great
So
Even if this movie was terrible
I'd still say it was worth it
Just to see Kristoff Waltz
Hang it out
And kind of flirting with Kuzuna Ai
During one of those weird promo events
Did you see that?
I did not
They have the cast of Battle Angel Alita
And a f**king screen
Sitting next to them
And Kuzuna Ai comes in to talk to them
That's
It's f**king weird
But totally on point
On brand
Can't say that it's not
Holy f**k
Has Mahershala Ali blown the f**k up
That dude is
Okay
He played
Remi Danton in House of Cards
Didn't see it
Well
The black guy from House of Cards
Is now
A multi Oscar winner
That's in every movie that's out
He's in every movie that came out
And he's going to be in every movie coming out
Mahershala Ali
Mahershala
He has a very distinct face
He's f**king great
He's solid
He's caught in the f**king blue mouth
He's caught in the f**king blue mouth
He's crushing it in everything
And he turns down nothing
He turns down nothing
I don't expect him to pop up all over the places
That he does and he does
He has like
He's probably the most recent
Oh his prowler
In f**king
Spiderverse
Spiderverse
I want to say that he is
He's like
The first new
Maybe I'm wrong
But I feel like he's the first
Newly knighted AAA
Not AAA, A-list actor in a way
Like he kind of came
House of Cards popped up
Then he just started taking work after that
And very quickly became
The dude that's in everything
And he's like absolutely
I'm not even like
If you pull up his IMDB
I can't even imagine what it looks like
Of upcoming projects and whatnot
But yeah
So I'll
Chalk one up to
Adaptation worked out
Now I can't comment on faithfulness
Or detail changes because I'm not familiar
With the original man god
In an isolated system
Worth it
And
It's an interesting world that wants to be
Revisited
I just hope it doesn't take another 19 years to get there
Hey I only saw just the trailers
See nothing else
It looks a lot visually
Like human revolution to me
Am I crazy? No you're not
It does look like human revolution
Or rather human revolution probably looks like
It took a lot of inspiration from that
You're walking around hangshot
You're talking to Hansers
I might as well just see it for that
Because that type of art
Is my shit
I love that stuff
But you have to keep in mind
That it's
Not
The future that you can see from here
It's the future so far flung
That your brain is going to stop
For fucking people's faces on robot
Torsos like just
Go on
You're too many years ahead to
Cool
Wow that
That's past
Star Trek really far
That's really fucking far
Hundreds of years past the point
Where you could possibly imagine
What it might be like
So just throw it so far ahead
That you're looking at magic
And that's the important part of the setting
And it's old too right
We love near future
Because it requires
Really detailed world building
That show you the things you like
And how you get from right now
To kind of over there
And I'm always fascinated
By the thing I want to pay that attention
To the most is what is the
Average homeless person in your
Future setting
What are they unimpressed by
Haha
The dude on the street sitting there
Jingling his cup
What ridiculous magic thing happens
In front of him and he just goes
You're a fucking robot dog
That is what's going to
Set up your expectations
And in this case
You're just looking at it so far
Pass anything you recognize that
Completely post transhumanism
You're just looking at magic
It's not even a question
It takes seconds to establish
That it's like
This is going to be kind of a poll
But are you familiar with the
Fantasy setting for
It's called New Manara
So it's
They used it for the new Plainscape
Game but it's an existing setting
And it is
Like a million years
Into the future
It is like just
Absurdly impossibly far
Into the future in which
There have been seven
Like Star Trek level societies
That rose and fell
And they all use completely
Different technologies
And no one knows how
Any of it works
But it's all clearly technology
But it's all magic
So the nanites swarm
And the fucking cloning bath
And all this crazy fucking shit
It's fucking goofballs
That's interesting
You might as well be praying to different gods
Yeah, okay
So that's fun
Um
And yeah
No, that's pretty much it
So
With that, we should probably start talking
About the news but this week
What are you going to be taking a look at?
So me, Pat, Patrick Wawaii
I'm going to be over at
Twitch.tv slash Angrius Pat
That's a Twitch stream where I play video games
On the live and talk about bullshit
Much like you've been hearing here
On Tuesday I'm going to finish off Ace Combat 7
So everybody stop whining at me
Plus that game's rad
On Wednesday I'm going to play New Vegas
Because that game's forever
On Thursday I'm going to play more Yakuza
Kiwami because people seem to like that
And on Friday, right now
Probably just hang out and play some Apex Legends
Probably just chill and play Apex Legends
And those all start at 8pm Eastern
And then on the weekend, fuck off
It's my days off, man
Uh
Over at Woolly versus
Jet Set Radio continues
There's a
I want to say Zoda the Ender
Is just wrapped up although we might
Have a little EX mission for you guys
But
Yeah, Zoda the Ender is just wrapped up
And yeah, RE2 continues
And
Jojo's Bizarre Adventure 7th Stand user continues
Started a new project that should be
Coming around
Sometimes soon
With one Austin eruption
We sat down and we had some fun
With
Such a fucking solid idea
I was like hell yeah
Woolly and Austin
Full LP
Playstation demo discs
It's a good time
Careful with that fucking beautiful Jo1
It's a race save file
Oh shit, okay
So that's going to be coming up soon
And
Me and Reggie are also working on something as well
Because Jet Set Radio's done so
We got a new LP coming up that
Is currently
Going through some planning phases
And figuring a little bit of shit out
But there's
There's a fucking
There's a ball that's been thrown up in the air
And we're not really sure when we'll catch it
Yeah, but right now
I mean just to throw it out there
So yeah we're going to be so the current cycle
We're going to be cycling in the
Woolly and Austin play Playstation demo discs
And
Me and Reggie
Are going to be sitting down and going
Through
The wonderful 101
We're doing it. What's that?
I've never heard of it, it must have sold
Poorly
So that should be a fucking good time
Everybody
Stay tuned, stick around
Channel content continues
In the meantime, stream wise
We're going to be doing some
Uh
We're going to be doing fighting games on Tuesday
This Tuesday we have
Something special planned, but it depends
It's temporary, it's a tentative plan
I don't want to jinx it
And I don't want to, I can't confirm it
So I can't announce it
But we're going to be taking a look at something cool
Hopefully
And then this Saturday
Not sure yet
I had some plans
Um
Might, I don't know
Well I got, I mean
I got to talk to you about when we can
Pick back up with RE2
I can do RE2 this week if you want to
But if you have something else you'd rather do
There's other stuff that was on the slate
That I do need to consider though
So yeah, we'll take a look
We'll take a look and we'll see
But lots of stuff coming
All of that available if you want
And on YouTube, so stick around
Fun times
And with that
We can go into news
Hey guy
What's new in the world this week
I'd say the biggest thing
Oh shoot
We've been doing a
Okay that flew by
Yeah that
That Schluter talk lasted a really long time
But that's okay
We've got time
Let's talk about
I hate that you invented that word
That word sucks
You suck
Burn it, burn it in
It's burned in, that's why I'm mad
Reggie
Steps down
Bowser steps up
Did you see that fucking Seattle Times article
Which one?
It's the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen
There's a lot of funny ones
Uh, fucking
Doug Bowser
New president of Nintendo of America
Yes, he shares the name of a Pokemon
Uh
Oh man
That's fantastic
Never change
Yeah man, Reggie's done
He's stepping it out in April
I'm tired
It's hard to have such a ready body all the time
But his plot
That started with him saying
That he was all about kicking ass and taking names
Has never been
Could have been more successful
Absolutely
He showed up and went I'm a badass
And everyone was like that guy's a badass
Nintendo needs badasses right now
He said it at a time when people were desperate
For a mature Nintendo
And he got that spot
Reggie always has this incredibly idiosyncratic
Way of speaking
Which for a long time
I interpreted as awkward
But later came
It's like oh it's kind of genuine
Like he just talks a little
Off and it made him
Very like Reggie
Yeah and he wants to say
That he's had a great time
All of these years
And like it sounded kind of fake and awkward
But he's so consistent
I'm like oh I think that's how Reggie talks
That's Reggie
And I liked it
That's the RFA
Now Doug Bowser's kind of fucked on that
Because he's got the cool name
So he's got to live up to it
But that's all he's got to do though
For the first year he can coast
On the name
And the fun from the name
I really hope Doug Bowser
Is
A goofy man
Because it is his fucking
Responsibility
To play into this
Pretty much
Now the only question is
What does he sound like
I don't think I've seen him talk
Or I don't remember it
But I certainly do hope that
It's like Hans Molman
Yeah
That's really
My wish
That's not fair
I wish a bunch of people sound like Hans Molman
I'm praying to Jesus right now
On stage at a Nintendo director
On video
For the first time
I can't even do a molman
Mo
Nintendo
I can't even do a molman
I'm Doug Bowser
He's got to come out
A little bit of millhouse if you need it
A little bit of just all of it
I need a goofy ass voice
You know what they need to do right
What they need to do is when the next time
This like
Scantily clad blonde
With the fucking Bowser shell walks out
And takes the crown off
And there's a poof of fucking smoke
And then Doug Bowser walks out
Yeah but
Yeah but they hate Bowser
Shut up he's Bowser he can do whatever he wants
So yeah man
There's not much to it besides the fact that
Reggie had a successful career
Enjoy your retirement man
He did his thing
He played smash
He was very bad at it
He became a JoJo character
For like a second
He had a Fist of the North Star character rather
Yeah he had awesome videos
Fucking fighting Iwata
He became a Muppet
He just gift
He became a Cyclops
Fuck I don't remember that
He eye-lasered somebody and she melted
You know what my favorite thing
Reggie ever did was not supernatural
It's when Bill Trinen made fun of him
Yes and he sent him to Japan
For like a year
You get the fuck out man
The fact that the guys
Doing that were like
Okay Bill's moving to fucking Japan for whatever
Right
Can we use that
Can we do a fucking bit where
I send him there out of revenge
Bill got killed
It's the best
That was fantastic
A lot of fun gimmicks
Video games are fucking weird
By the way in the video game industry is fucking weird
Because we're talking about
This CEO of a major company
As if he were a god damn anime
Cartoon character
But that's what my point was
It was part of the job
I was about to say that they decided to lean into it
When they realized that the people
That are spending money and hanging around
That they've had fans for years
Are all following them as individuals
As if they were celebrity characters
Or cartoon characters
Then they realized let's just have fun with it
My biggest disappointment of Kazurai getting promoted
To being the president of Sony
Is that we didn't see more goofy bullshit
Come out of Kazurai's mouth as a result
Because Kazurai would say some goofy
Bullshit
I mean Yushie is pretty fantastic as well
Yeah Yosuke is great
Yeah absolutely leaning into that
Cartoony shit
The thing with Reggie is that his entire career
Is just in that frame
Like the moment he said
Kicking ass and taking names
That was it
You're now born from memes
And two memes you shall return
Then he goes my body is ready
And in my mind I'm like he knew
He fucking knew
So you know
Like I feel as if over the years
Yeah we've had
The people that you see on stage
At every fucking Microsoft conference
Every
What's his name again
John Layden
Not even Layden, no the Microsoft guy
The evil one
Or the good one
Phil Spencer
Spencer right
You remember that fucking asshole
They had run in the thing
When we have a console for you
To call the Xbox to see that fucking piece of shit
Sure
What the fuck is his name
I don't know but you see but that's why
I was always so excited about Jamsey
And I know
And I know
No one remembers Jamsey and I'm doing this
Bit one more time even though it's been
At least two years since I brought him up
The fuck are you talking about
Jamsey was the Japanese
Xbox representative that shaved
An Xbox logo into the back of his head
And this guy
Was gonna push the Xbox for Japan
And he was a character
And he was basically becoming a cartoon character
And then it went away
They didn't lean into it
And I was sad because it had
Potential
I feel like Phil Spencer is a little bit
Of a cartoon
But then tries to be real but the realness
Is fake
He seems nice enough
You know who's really good at it
Currently I think Sean Layden is probably the best
At this meme game
But you can feel the business within him
But then he knows to take the suit off
And like
When he was chilling
When we were watching those Let's Watches
Oh yeah it was fucking spitting poison
At the screen
And then he dressed down every other
Appearance ever after that
Because that reaction must have been fucking universal
And then he's just hanging out and like
You guys like
Vib ribbon?
Yeah I do
And then he did the PlayStation Experience thing
Which was him just hanging out on a fucking couch
For an hour
We haven't seen him since
He became
Yeah he leaned into it and understood
That you needed to have a little bit of charm
And you couldn't just stand up there and be like
Suit and tie
Here's our earnings and quarterlies
I feel like the video game industry has the highest proportion
Of sycophants and insane
Cynics of like any industry
Cause like there's people who are like
I love you man Gianna
People who are like this businessman seems evil
Because
He wore an indie shirt
That is appropriate for the venue
You know like there's like
Just the absolute farthest extremes
There's
Oh my god Nintendo's
I'm gonna come and there's like
This fucking businessman
Yeah he's a businessman of course he is
That's how he got the job
That's how he got the job by being a fucking businessman
But you're like fucking
Gameers should be running
Real gamers should be running the show
Yeah
Fuck off
Farewell Reggie
Bye Reggie
You had a good run
It was good for you to go to Nintendo
You probably wouldn't have gotten this level of warm
Reception of your retirement back at Pizza Hut
You left without controversy
And everybody thought you were a cool guy
Um
Yeah that is pretty wild isn't it
No
I'm not supposed to say
Here's a weird one
What the fuck are you talking about
Just fucking say it
Next month GDC is popping up
Yeah
And there's currently a little bit of
An ARG
That is going on
I'm too broke to go to GDC
No
That's a different thing
But why this thing is
Taking it's sweet time loading
Hopefully it'll pop up soon
People are saying that it might be
Possible that
It might be possible that there's a gateway time out
On its way
That's crazy
I'm talking about the fact that
There might be a Vampire the Masquerade announcement
That'd be cool
But that is
Sounds really not real
It's a really cool setting
That has been incredibly, unevenly treated
In games
So this is a fucking
Roll a D100
In terms of how excited you should be
Right
So Paradox
Interactive are the folks who
Two years ago
No more than that
2015 Paradox is cool
They bought all of White Wolf's properties
I forgot about that actually
They bought all of White Wolf's shit
So
Even the weird shit no one cares about
Because that mage stuff is lame
So they bought
All of it and now they're the ones
That own Vampire the Masquerade
And they are pushing
An ARG called
Tender
Which is a dating app that links people
Based on their blood type
And it looks legit
But if you log into it with your Paradox account
You somehow are able to log in
Okay
And so people are basically looking at the app
And there's leaked memos
And weird shit about like
Yes, again the blood type thing
In some sort of meeting
In San Francisco on March 21st
And
Everybody's thinking that
This is Mark the Date
This will be the biggest announcement in the history of the company
Towards the idea that
What does Paradox have to do
With blood and
Tender
It would be Vampire the Masquerade for sure
And telling everybody to go to one location
Vampire the Masquerade is the most popular out of all
The properties they bought
So everyone's thinking we might be seeing
An announcement related to Vampire the Masquerade
If they're making it, there's a good chance that Obsidian
Will be working on it
Obsidian and them work together a lot
And that seems like a natural fit
Now the idea is
Would this be a new thing
Or would this be a remade thing
This would be a new thing for sure
Absolutely
I think people would be just as excited
If it was a fucking remake though
A remake that worked
That's what I'm trying to, that's what I'm saying
A remake that you don't have to go through
Mods and mods and mods to fucking
I should point out every time somebody tells you
To play Vampire the Bloodline Masquerade
They're like the mods fixed it now
That's always a lie
Quite frankly, a re-release
That included all the mods
No, no, no
That game was built off of toothpicks
You'd have to remake the whole fucking thing
That's why I asked the question
Because it would be worth it
It would be a worthy endeavor to get a version
That didn't have problems
But that's possibly interesting
And exciting and we'll see what happens
We'll see what happens in March
A time where we couldn't care less
March is a month in which
I don't give a shit about fuck
Because DMC and Sekiro are out
Well
You guys excited for the podcast during those months?
Guess what we're gonna talk about
Fuck those months, how about right now?
Refreshingly
There are no major DLC plans
For DMC5 outside of one big free update
Which would be Bloody Palace
So the Bloody Palace update is going to be the only one
Yep
As far as
If they've been out so far
You know what this feels like? Feels like Ghost Survivors for RE2
That's it? That's all there is
Feels like a month out
They're like, hey, here's a new thing, cool
And yeah, so
Glad you didn't sell the game
The worry
That, you know, there might be
All this extra bullshit
You know, this can be
Thankfully, like, yeah, no, it's all there
Whatever you need is gonna be there
And in RE2, we'll get an SE
Where you play as 10 new characters
And you can buy robs
You buy robs right now, dude
So that's what it is
Right
Yeah, Bloody Palace and that's it
So I was like, okay, that's cool
But yes, the buying robs is here to stay, I suppose
Ever since 4SE
Not much else to that
There is
The
There's just a bunch, it's just a weird
Newsweek, a bunch of weird shit
Similarly weird
Let's blast through it
Is the fact that
Apparently Yoko Tara is becoming a virtual YouTuber
Yeah, I heard that, I heard that shit
Uh, that's right up his alley
It says here that
He's gonna be basically like, you know those
Idol tubes? Yeah, I know
Yeah, he's gonna be doing that
Yeah, that's on brand
During the month of March, so
While you're not playing Devil May Cry
Uh, you can tune in
Or pay attention to Vampire
You can have it on your second monitor
You can watch fucking
A creepy Emile Head
Play video games and
Make weird remarks
In a language I don't speak
Um, I hope he has big crying
Breakdowns and freakouts
I hope the mass cracks
I hope it cracks even more
You mean you hope that he like
Tilt his head and the fucking things just actually splits in half
And fucking pulls apart
I want, I want to
I want to see him break down
Why are you wishing for this?
Because I watched him have a tantrum
About Square Enix and it was hilarious
And I want more of that content
Oh, okay
Um, and it's a, it's
He's set to appear on, yeah
Like the virtual, it says virtual idol group
Gems Company, which is an announced
Virtual cast V-Radio show
Which, when I go and take a look at it
It's like
A bunch of idol
Fucking things
And yeah, so you've got all these cute
Like, idol girls doing the whole
Um, um, anime
Mocap thing, you know
Just like, uh, uh
The, the, whatever
Just like the other virtual YouTubers
And that one channel that I forgot the name of
Is gonna, uh, absolutely replace us
Kizuna Ai
Kizuna Ai, thank you
And hanging out with
Just hanging out with Kristoff Walls, please
Hang out with Kristoff Walls, exactly
I'm replaced right now
There you go, and now
Soon to be Yoko Taro as well
Kizuna Ai
Fuck, fuck
All of us in our jobs
We're irrelevant
I don't know, man
My gross baldness is currently not
Like, taken up by any of these virtual YouTubers
But then Yoko, enter Yoko Taro
Yo, he's got a mask that you know
You don't know
But what I'm saying is this is currently only
Having an appeal of cute girl anime girls
Okay, but now like a gross weirdo
Is getting in on it
So now gross weirdo virtual YouTubers
Are showing you
No, woolly, no, gross weirdo is my tag
I need that
But that's what I'm saying
You thought you were immune
Because these are all cute white boys
Why would anyone make a VR model of
Gross weirdo
But now there's gross weirdos coming
So the whole market's cornered
No
Anybody who shows up for gross weirdos
Will just watch that instead
And then, you know what
It'll be a gross weirdo that is perfect
As a gross weirdo
No
All their flaws
I don't know
You're replaceable
I'm not replaceable
You're being replaced right now
No one can replace me
Because I'm the only person who loves to litter
And they get to write a script
So that their character can be funny the whole time
Aw, that's bullshit
They have writers
You need lulls
You need massive lulls in entertainment value
They have writers
You can't compete
Virtual fucking tubers
Good stream man, a stream
Without about 30 minutes of just like
This part sucks
Can't wait till it gets to that part later
Where that's fun
Can't wait for Yoko Taro
To get out of game development
Well, he's still got to make that fucking 14 raid
He's sure
But he's pretty much about to quit
And just do this full time
Then he's going to read the comments
And then he's going to go back to making games
The, uh
The
One of the weirdest ones
Of all these weird announcements
Is
The crossover games are flying high
And
Why not
Strike while that iron's hot
And get Kyo Kusanagi
Iori Yagami
Athena
Asayami
Or whatever her name is
And Mai Shiranui
And Leona Heidern
To join Fantasy Star Online 2
This news is not for you
North Americans
Or Europeans
It is the weirdest crossover
Since
I guess the witcher's showing up
In all the shit he's been showing up in
So the witcher's showing up in Monster Hunter
Is not as fucking stupid
As you would think
What is, what's happening?
Oh, lighting, huh
So the witcher's showing up in Monster Hunter
Isn't quite as stupid as you think
Because Geralt actually has a long history
Of falling into alternate
Universes via portals
And also, need I remind you, Wuli
What is Geralt's profession?
He is a witcher
He's a Monster Hunter
Yes, right
Literally
Literally a Monster Hunter
And he hates portals
Yeah
He hates portals
This footage of Fantasy Star Online 2
With the KOF characters in it
Reminds me of KOF Online
It's really strange
But they're doing it
And I mean, I've never seen SNK push as hard
To get guests in different games
As they are right now
Because starting with Mai Shiranui
And Dead or Alive
We then got Iori in Million Arthur
Not Million Arthur
Yeah, Million Arthur, that's correct
And
We're seeing all kinds of crossovers
Being pushed right now
And Terry Bogard is showing up in
Fighting EX Lair
Geese is in fucking
Tekken
Tekken
So cross promotion
Has never been as high as it is right now
So why not throw in the whole cast
Including Kyo
And his bodega
Punches into Fantasy Star Online 2
Which, to be honest
This is the most gameplay
What is it I'm looking at right now
Looks really cool
Yes, the most gameplay of Fantasy Star Online
At PSO 2 that I've seen
Not for you
It looks a lot better than PSO 1
Not for you, Woolly
Stop looking at it
Well, now I know why Liam wanted it so bad
It's never gonna come out here
Combat looks pretty slick
Yeah, sure does
Dude, I wanted it to come out here
But I knew it never would
Damn
Never
So anyway
Yeah, I don't know
I don't know what to deal with that is
But there it is
And the fact that at the bottom it's like
PSO 2 is available for PC, PlayStation, Vita
PS4 and Switch is like
Not for you
They made a Switch port
Not for you
They just hate you
They hate you
Well anyway
Um
We had that
We had
Probably Liam and I spoke to somebody at PlayStation
And he's like, dude, I'm trying
And that was like fucking
Three, four years ago
So that didn't happen
You got anything on these Switch ports?
RE1, RE0, RE4
I will take a page out of Clems' book
He made a tweet about this the other day
He said, one day I will arrange all my copies
Of RE4 in a circle
And I will stand in it
And be transported to Leonverse or something
So it looks like it's REmake
Right?
Yeah
And RE0, yeah
Sure
Yeah, sure
It's GameCube port
GameCube port
GameCube port
GameCube ports
That's fine
You're not getting 7 and 2
Fuck, no you're not
So
It feels like
How fucking stupid is the series of words we just said
You can get 0, 1 and 4
But not 7 and 2
It feels as if
Like the way what we heard about Nintendo
Talking about Kingdom Hearts
The other day was that
They're basically going to all these major releases
And going, okay, can we...
No?
Alright
Does it have the name on it a little?
What's the next best thing?
Yeah
Right? What else can we do?
And then this is kind of what we're...
What we're getting
Like, I wouldn't be surprised if some form of Devil May something
Devil May Cry trilogy or something
At some point, winds up, you know
Maybe for a special edition
Yeah
Wind up on the switch
You know?
That'd be fucking goofy
But I don't even fucking...
It doesn't sound like the most, you know
Impossible thing
Like
That's kind of what Nintendo's doing right now
Makes sense
Those games are great
Well, not 0
But the two of those games are great
Um...
Yeah, not much to say about this one
But just, you know
There's some weird hitbox stuff happening in Apex Legends
And someone did a little shoot around the characters
Trace
Yeah
Test
And they found out that
A pathfinder has a gigantic body
Like Gibraltar style
Yup
And that even though
His skinny little robot legs and arms
And head are tiny
If you shoot the bubble around
And in between his, like, arms and legs
It still manages to do damage to him
Of course it does
So it's kind of weird
That makes perfect sense
But other characters don't have that
Yeah
So they're addressing the issue
Is what they say
Yeah, the other thing is that
A pathfinder is a glitch machine
And can fucking
Run up the walls
Climb anything in the game
Yeah
Yeah, that's...
He has a specific quick switch thing
That he can fire faster than other characters
He's getting fucking
He's getting switched the fuck up real soon
There was something else
Latency in that game rewards you
If you have a shitty ping
Because it's all client side
So hit detection
So if somebody, like, if you're lagging out
And you shoot the guy in front of you
Who's dead still a hundred times
Even if he's in a building
Two doors over
He'll still die
When the server catches up
Man
It's fucking goofy
That new gun is not great
It's amazing if you get the hop up
The start up on the havoc is not great
I'm not enjoying it
Only if you get the hop up
If you get the hop up, it's good
I know you're a big hit scan boy
So you're a huge fan
That select fire shit is the worst
But what it should...
Like what it probably should do
Is let you have both on
That would be rat
That would be OP
That'd be rat
As is, I'm like
No, get the fucking spin up hop up
And it's a good gun
If you don't have it, fuck it
It's a mega buster
Yeah
The main thing that I feel with it
Is that if you get the drop on somebody
So you can spin it up before they're like
A gun fight
They're fucking toast
Well, I mean, devotion is the same idea
It's a laser, basically
But if...
But if there's a situation where you both
See each other at the same time
You're dead before the gun fires
That's it
Like, it's just not, you know
So anytime you have that level of
Yeah, start up, you're just like
Okay, I'm eating how many carbine clips
Not clips, excuse me
Magazines
I really like the Bangalore has...
The clip is something you put in your hair
The city is using their hair
This is a magazine
This is a magazine
I like it
How many...
Yeah, exactly
So how much carbine are you going to eat
Before you get the first shot off?
Probably an entire R99 magazine
Yeah
Which means you're dead
Don't do it
Don't do it
Anyway
That is happening
We got the...
Yeah, I mean, it's not much
But it's just like fucking Spider-Man 1
Right?
Yay!
That's a good movie
Sorry, Incredibles
But your tweet about
Considerate...
For your consideration, Incredibles 2
That was like the worst thing I ever seen
Oh, don't do it
And just everybody
Matt in the comments and everybody
And fucking
Sweary in the comments as well
Just with the Spider-Man reaction face
Like
Like, no
You don't get to speak
Incredibles 2, you were a fun movie
And we waited a long time for you
But you unfortunately have to deal with Miles Morales
Right now
And you have no chance
I retweeted that bit of Miles
Touching the fucking shoulder of the Oscar
Going, hey
Bearer, bearer, seek less
All those edits were great
If a movie gives us a bunch of memes
It should win an Oscar
There should be an Oscar for memes
Well, you must have heard last year
About the Academy going
Hey guys, we know that this Black Panther thing is happening
So why don't we introduce a new category
Called Best Popular Category
And then if you're a real big popular movie
Everyone gets to begin an Oscar
And it'll be great
And everyone's like
How about you go fuck yourself
How about you just pick the right movies
You piece of shit
And not be up your own
Sending up in your tower
You old bastards
Up your ass
And they're like
Okay, well, never mind
We changed your mind
It's weird that the ivory tower
Of the Oscar Academy
Can exist inside the Academy's asses
They hate superhero movies
And they hate the idea
Of working with her
They hate animated movies more
Of course
And they also hate cinematography
And set design
Because run that during the commercials
Fuck, that's bullshit
If you're not a big star
Then you don't deserve screen time
I feel like every single year
I don't pay attention to the Oscars
I don't give a shit
But every single year
The overwhelming feeling is
Man, fuck the Oscars
I hate the Oscars
Joseph Harris, man
He was so right
Joseph was so right
And then he put out a way out with his team
Guess what?
That's one of the best games
That came out that year
That game's amazing
Fuck the Oscars
The fact that
All of that shit went down
Or whatever
And then like
Everyone's like
Each shit
Black Panther was good
It was a good movie
We're not taking it
And they're like
Okay
Costume design
Production design
Original score
Yeah, right
And it's like
The first time that they've been
Brute forced into acknowledging it
Because they fucking hate it
And to capitalize on the moment
Right?
Trevor Noah goes up there
And I don't know if you saw the clip or not
But he goes up
And he's like
You know
When I was a young kid
Growing up in Wakanda
King T'Challa would fly overhead
And I'd look up
And just be like
Wow, you know
Like, and then he said a quote
And the quote was
The white people won't know I'm lying
And he said
And it meant like
Whenever we're together
We can conquer anything
And you know
Just
It was just like
And everyone
Stone faced him saying
When I was growing up in Wakanda
Yeah
Because why would
The fucking Academy
I don't know
Have any idea
They didn't watch
They didn't watch Black Panther
They hate Black Panther
And everything it represents
They hate it
Right?
Fuck this comic book movie
They don't want that shit
Amongst their real films
So it was great
To pull that over
Listen, dude, listen
It was such a perfect timing
Leonardo DiCaprio had to eat
Bear poop
In the revenance
That's acting
Oh, man
And the revenant was a great film
I remember watching this amazing video
That broke down like
A million years ago
Broke down like after revenant came out
Where it broke down the idea
This fucked up idea that acting
Like the quality of your acting
Can be measured by the suffering
You endured during your role
How fucking stupid that is
Christian Bale subscribes to that
Yeah
It's fucking dumb
Acting is not suffering
The lengths that they went through though
And being a jerk
All day on set
While people are trying to get shit done
I remember
That means Jared Leto
Leto is the greatest actor of all time
Fuck Method
I remember hearing about Method
For the first time
And being like
Wow
Those people are fucking crazy
Like
That's so committed
I wonder
Like what's that like
And then you just hear all the stories
And then you watch the fucking Jim Carrey thing
And you're like
Oh, it means you're an asshole
You know what I
Everyone hates it
You know what always got me about method acting
Because the thing that got
It's a philosophy of acting, right
And on its face
There's value there
Hey, are you gonna play a firefighter
Go hang out with firefighters
See what the fuck it's about, right
But then the method, right
That's when it gets crazed
You're an investigative journalist
For a minute
And all I can think about is like
In my opinion acting is like
Convincing people of a truth
That's not real, right
In this particular situation
And I'm not an actor
So this is just a layman
But it's like
Wait a second
If Christoph Waltz
Can portray a character
Immaculately and totally believably
Without the method
Does that mean you just suck
Compared to Waltz
That you need to embody the character
Totally in order to do your job
See, that's the question, right
Is they might see it as like
You know, rock-leaning it, right
Just like forcing it in until
You believe every aspect of it
And when the results are amazing
They are amazing, right
But same, like yeah
When Anthony Hopkins is fucking
Crushing it on Westworld
Being scary
And you're like, oh my god
And he's like, he reads the script
And he goes, yep, okay
I walked in, I read the script
I went, yeah, cool, I'll do it
Got it, and it's like
Oh, you're not gonna be him
All day
He's like, no, fuck it
I'm gonna go home and watch the TV
You know, it's like
No, you kind of don't necessarily
Need to do this
And it might make it more impactful
In your life
And the answer might be
Well, you need to do this, Christian
You need to do this, Jared
What I'm saying is that
Method actors are crazy
Yeah
And every time you hear about them
You hear about how no one on set
Like them
I mean, that's basically the deal
Because it's like, okay
Can we get into position?
I ain't never getting into position
That's like, well
Denzel
We kind of need you to be on your mark
So that the film can
King Kong ain't got nothing on me
I was just thinking about that
I was thinking about
You wouldn't tell King Kong to get into position
Like listen
He must have been fucking
Insufferable, man
Like just the worst
Just like
Denzel, who's Denzel?
Who is Denzel?
Alonzo, I'm sorry
Alonzo, like fuck
Wesley, can you open your eyes?
Who's Wesley?
Blade, can you open your eyes?
No
Just
Holy shit, man
You know, yeah, anyway
So
And now I just saw somebody
By the way, we do occasionally
Look at the chat
There is one instance of method
That I will applaud
And that is Robert Downey Jr.
In Tropic Thunder
As he went method of a method
And supposedly he did not drop character
For the entire film until the end
Of the commentary had been recorded
I cannot
I still can't believe
They got away with that
Clean, no one gave a shit
How they do
Yeah, but it was wild
I remember, like
You knew a fucking big budget comedy
With a fucking, what
Is the Australian or some shit
In blackface, the whole fucking movie
Wow
And they agreed and they greenlit it
And they filmed it and it happened
And it still exists
It's like
And people watch it and they talk about
All that movie was great
And I fucking die, I howled
It was hilarious
I can't believe they got away with it
The smartest thing they did in Tropic Thunder
Is you have Robert Downey Jr. doing blackface
Like an idiot, like an idiot
In that movie
And you have another black character
Looking at him going, you're an idiot
The whole movie
Sure
That's in my mind, that's what it may work
But they lean in with fucking
With a simple gym
Oh, fuck
Or simple Tom or whatever
Yeah, whatever the fuck it was
In all directions
Everywhere
It was crazy
It feels like a South Park movie directed by Tom Cruise
Tom Cruise might as well have had
Like a bigger nose
You know what I mean?
Like he was leaning in as fucking hard as he could
On that like
It was really nuts
That they got away with that shit
Tropic Thunder is wild
That movie is wild
I can't believe it exists
And Jay's there
Yeah, yes
Yeah, he is
That's just crazy
That is the least 2019 thing
I have, like
The Oscar for the least 2019 movie
Yeah, we're looking at a world
It's like this fucking
Post
You can say post Tropic Thunder
You can say post Team America
Because Team America is fucking wild too
I'm actually sweating
I am also sweating
Thinking about it, like
God
Wow, anyway
I'm uncomfortable
Um
Congrats to Miles Morales
You did it
Everybody did it
Everyone who worked on that movie
Seems like they did a really good job
Man, I hope they enjoy their Oscar
Seems
Well, I don't know
They did
We saw the
You don't know
There could have been one guy
Fucking the dog
Saw the fruits of their labor
You know
It's a good movie
Let's take some emails
Hey, if you want to send an email
Into this here podcast
That you're listening to right now
Right now
You would send that into
CastleSuperBeastMail
At gmail.com
You'd be sending that email to
Oh, excuse me
Got a little burpee there
CastleSuperBeastMail
At gmail.com
If you do send an email
Into CastleSuperBeastMail
At gmail.com
Your email might get read
On this podcast
The CastleSuperBeastCath
Wait, the cast
Oh, I don't want
That is confusing
That is actually confusing
See, I tried
That's why I made it clear
The CastleSuperBeast podcast
Yes
I could have made that mail
That is legitimately fucking
Super confusing
I chose that mail very carefully
Yeah, that is weird
Don't do it
You might have your email read like this
Hopefully, I gave Woolly enough time
To pull up the email
So, we got one coming in
From
Matt T says
Yo, man
Hey, Matt
Hey, Woolly
With Get Into Fighting Games
Being sort of a spiritual successor
To FNF
And can we get a continuation
Of SMS
Called Get Out of Fighting Games
That's a great name
You claim the barrel
The bottom of the barrel is still thick
I'd love to see FGC players
Lower themselves to poverty
That is a great name
For a segment
Get Out
That's really funny
We are playing poverty
Absolutely
Every week, if you haven't noticed
Like the first time we played
The first week we played
Something legit
We played like Mark of the Wolves
And then we did like fucking
Nero Neo Aquarium
So, we are playing poverty
Yo, I saw some clips
You playing Neo Aquarium
That shit looked crazy
Yeah
It looked awesome
We are, I am subjecting FGC players
To absolute trash
So, yes
Yes, that is totally happening
God, shout outs to fucking 2 metal
And Cranky Construct and Lee Mouse
Yo, yeah, for real
Like
A message cranky right after that
I'm like, how did you do that?
And he was like, it was no problem
I'm like, how's no problem
How are you so strong?
I'm so happy with that intro
You should be
It's the best
We got one coming in from
Get Out of Fighting Games
Get Out of Fighting
That's fantastic
Austin says
Hey, Castle Super
Opening with an hour of talking
About childhood trauma beasts
It was closer to an hour and a half this week
Been meaning to get around
To sending you this
But, lol, no energy
You know what you need
Jaw rule stole my shirt
What?
That fire fest stuff
Is a bit out of the zeitgeist now
But I was actually
Anyway, directly affected by
Fire shit show
Back in 2017
I had started a long distance
Relationship with this girl
I met via a shitpost
I made on Twitter
That went somewhat viral
She was working at an event planning company
Which was planning a big festival
Called Fire
Although she wasn't on that project
She has her own place
And we made plans to visit in June
Until then, I decided to be cute and send her
One of my favorite shirts in the mail
Fast forward a week after
And everything is fucked
And the receptionist with the only key to the mail
Just stopped coming after the meetings
And everyone was asked to keep out
To keep working without pay
To this day, I don't know what happened to the shirt
So although it's somewhat indirect
I blame Jaw rule
Because it's funny to say
Jaw rule stole my shirt
He stole your shirt
He's wearing it right now
We're still together though
And we're moving in in a couple months
Oh, that's very sweet
Congratulations
There you go
Thanks, Austin
You should get to the bottom of that
I think he might have stole your shirt, bro
You know who to help you?
50 Cent
50 Cent will help you
Investigate the stolen shirt
Investigate what the deal with the shirt is
He is bored
He is a bored rich man
There's a lot of smart people in this room
I wouldn't say I stole a shirt
Jaw, you're wearing the shirt right now
I just borrowed it for a while
Jaw, it's dirty
It stinks
You haven't taken the shirt off in weeks
We got one coming in
Very aggressively because
Oh, yeah?
Aggressive emails
Dilly Dally decided to keep bumping this one
for weeks upon weeks upon weeks
You should not read it
It's a good email
But it's like, I got it
I got it, Dilly
You don't have to do that
I got it
Anybody who ever tries this gimmick ever again
will get those emails deleted
So you send those in once
Yeah, I'm not rewarding this behavior
But it's decent enough
Dilly Dally says, hey, people who bring joy
to me
I was recently having a conversation
with my best bud about what makes games hard
Above the belief that many of the games
are considered hard are not really that hard
but rather punishing
I started with the example of souls
Mechanically, souls are not difficult
As many people have shown
like one bros or randomized mods
it gets a reputation because it's punishing
with mistakes that have severe consequences
Aside from the plot
when you start the game
you already have all the abilities
and things you need to beat it
There's nothing standing in your way
but your own mistakes and inexperience
My friend brought Cuphead up
Cuphead is fucking hard
They beat it in two hours
and they find games of this type easy
because they're also a rhythm gaming wizard
After the conversation
it turned to how FPS games and other genres
like RPGs would fit this paradigm
of difficulty versus punishment
Games that capitalize on mistakes and poor planning
versus games that are actively impeding the ability
to succeed and adding more enemies
versus games that passively impede the player
like having less ammo
You might have touched upon this topic
when discussing Rising Thunder vs Street Fighter vs Dive Kick
Character action games like Devil May Cry 4
aren't really punishing
because you can take many hits
but it is hard because your ranking and style
require mastery of the game
This can be seen as perpendicular and high punishment
FPS games such as Insurgency or Dave Infamy
where a brand new person can frag the top
because the person at the top made a mistake
and missed a shot
This is a really broad topic
It's basically this email
is just a question like
what's the deal with difficulty in games
This is way too broad
to answer adequately here
but I would actually broaden out
his definition of difficulty
of difficulty versus punishment
There are dozens of ways
games can be difficult
Games can be
physically demanding
of your reflexes and eyesight
Games can be mentally demanding
of your ability to plan ahead
like Tetris
Tetris is like
you gotta be fast but you also gotta think fast
Games
many games, particularly a lot of the games that I like to play
the difficulty
lies in a lack of knowledge
Take an isometric RPG
I don't know how the enemies
and the systems in this game work
therefore it is difficult
As I gain mastery over what this character does
what this enemy does
it becomes more easy and that knowledge
will carry me forward
I'd say RPGs are absolutely that
because there's no
the only thing that'll fuck you up is a bad decision
sometimes a bad role
but you can always mitigate that
with good knowledge
A game like Super Meat Boy
is actually just severely punishing
it's not that it's hard
as much as it is
you cannot make mistakes
exactly, so if you allow
for zero mistakes
the game will automatically have that perception
of being harder than it actually is
there are other games that are not that difficult
but are extraordinarily punishing
I would say
I don't want to say Dark Souls
because
Dark Souls is difficult in a lot of places
and it's difficult
in a very weird meta way
when Dark Souls and Demon's Souls 1 came out
they did not function
like other games around them
so they had a inferred
knowledge problem
Cuphead is hard as fuck
Cuphead is
hard because you can't
make mistakes
if you could make more mistakes in Cuphead
it would not be as hard
start the level over
that's what it is
there's all these different factors
to difficulty
and all the best games will introduce
all the types of difficulty
knowledge, reflex
planning
etc
experience
but some games are just like
do you have the mental brain power to plan ahead
for example
my dad used to play
the PC version of Wrist
for 195
Beast all over that fucking game
I couldn't figure out what the fuck he was doing
he learned exactly how the AI would move
at that point the game became totally trivialized
because whatever
you know exactly what the enemy is going to do
so I would say Darkest Dungeon is a pleasant mix
of all things
because knowing what's coming
if I were to tell you exactly what was about to happen
that doesn't guarantee
that you have the ability to stop it
but it does give me the ability to mitigate it
so for example the ruins
don't bring bleed nothing there bleeds
but if you've already committed to
that journey
you might be fucked
of characters that might not be
you know
the ones you're fucking looking for
like yeah you might be fucked in that room
and then there's games that have mechanical difficulty
versus purely memorization difficulty
Darkest Dungeon 2 is coming out
yeah by the way Darkest Dungeon 2 is coming out
Darkest Dungeon 2
Darkest Dungeon 2
that's the best
that's the best
I don't think I like Darkest Dungeon
I think I love Darkest Dungeon and I think I am miserable
really?
I can't get anywhere
I'm miserable with every mistake
it's
the goblins make it bad
okay
the mind goblins make it bad to play
did you
attempt any of the other modes
I played on radiant
I played like 10 hours and I'm
anxious and miserable the whole time
I appreciate it
and I know it's a fantastic game
but I don't think it's for me
wow
the mind goblins
but other people with less mind goblins
have a similar issue it's just like
the core of the game which is throw this shit in the dirt
it doesn't matter
hurts me
that sucks to pat
in terms of characters
characters, runs
anything
are you attempting a perfect run?
no
because you're going to get out with characters
that you lose
you know how every time you finish a run
in Darkest Dungeon you have negative effects
you crawl past the finish line
but you end up like oh this guy got this
debuff and this guy is stressed
those negative effects feel worse to me
than the success of the mission
feels good
put them in the cloister
you know
every mission ends with me feeling worse
than I feel happy
because of the downsides
because I never feel like I succeeded
even when I actually succeeded
but it's progress
goblins
and there's a non goblin version
of that as well
I don't even know
how to address that one because it's like
that sucks
I like to play games and feel like I'm doing well
if I am doing well
and Darkest Dungeon is explicitly designed
to kill that feeling on purpose
and that's cool
but that makes me feel bad
here's what I can say
is you can mitigate that
by doing two things
one you can cheat
by just like
wiki-ing everything
and
once you get back
whenever you do get negative effects and occasionally
your curiosity is a little bit too high
or whatever the fuck
you just spend the rich rich rich money you have
just
it's the kind of game that I'm going to try
again and again and again
and again like once a month
probably until the sequel comes out
did you play with mods?
only the one that increases tooltips
and makes the game a little faster
that's it
I was explicitly recommended off
of nearly all mods
by a ton of people
because they horribly unbalanced the game
and it was recommended Radiance by pretty much everyone
it's not any easier
I heard it faster
I've only ever played the raw base game
so I can't speak for any of them
except for the brand new
knowledge I've had
I appreciate that game
but I think I might hate it
but I will continue
to attempt to appreciate it
because that's how I felt about Demon's Souls
this exact feeling
is how I felt about Demon's Souls
and then I crossed a threshold
that whole
so the fact that you get
your life bar permanently halved
upon death
you got over that
I never went human the first time I played
Demon's Souls ever so that extra
part of the life bar might as well not have existed
so you were literally undead the entire time
given a situation like that
I will literally go
nope I'm never going to buff myself
it'll just go away
so I'll just fucking
what about eating fucking herbs in Resident Evil
that just gets you back up to your default state
plus better
if it's all three now
yeah but I only use those in boss fights
when I know I'm going to take more damage
goblins
well I beat Resident Evil 2 Hardcore
the other night
I finished that game
on Hardcore
which is much more difficult
30 shotgun shells
175 handgun rounds
a secondary weapon that you haven't seen yet
completely full of ammo
and like 27 Magnum rounds
and was still juicing enemies
because what if I don't have enough
what if I don't have enough
in like the last rooms
I had ammo to kill the entire game
twice over
I do not want to be that
I gotta save it what if you need it later
oh man
no what if you need it later man
keep trying
I beat the final boss with the Magnum ammo
and then
point out oh man I almost ran out of Magnum ammo
a good thing I saved it and people point out
you had
hundreds of handgun rounds
and almost 50 shotgun rounds
what are you
talking about
I
but you already know
deep down inside how good
it's a never ending struggle
you know how good the game is
yeah it's amazing
alright
greetings lord chewington
and sir fuckface
castle super beast
clef says
after the biggest most awful
most tragic event in history that is the solution
of spfp I decided to go and listen to the old
podcast from episode one during my daily commute
oh that's probably a trip
as I listened they couldn't help but let off a constant
theme of oh no this podcast after podcast
as I listened for your enthusiasm for things like mighty
number nine and the future of kickstarter games
the bright 60 fps
everything the new generation
of consoles
do you remember any other statement or previous
positions that has aged as well as a fine
glass of milk my favorite one is that I
predicted the switch to the letter
I'm gonna hold on to that when forever
yeah I'm gonna go ahead
and say that I I'm like I can't stop you
but if you go back and decide to listen
to old shit including
the beginning of this podcast
it's dated and
probably all wrong and terrible it's transient
it's a moment it's an ephemeral
transient form of entertainment
that often will not hold up because
it has zero hindsight
and we're all
living
speculation
day to day like you don't feel that the president
speculation because you don't have any future
knowledge I've been told on occasion that
I might speculate a little wildly
I think everybody but that's fun
to me I think all of you listening I think
everyone if you could go back
and listen to
the speculation and excitement you had
for things in the past based on
not knowing what horrible things were coming
down the pipe
you would cringe
I do feel however that it is appropriate
that the most wrong we ever
were on that podcast was like
the first thing we ever talked about
which was mighty number nine
was that as it's the first episode
it is the first fucking episode
that's why that keeps coming back and it is like
if you're not excited for mighty number nine
you are fucking stupid that is a quote one of
us said
I was wondering why that kept coming back up
when people talk about the old ones but it's the first one
it's the first one and it is like the actual
fucking wrongest ever
that's amazing that's fantastic
you can't change it
you can have it any other way
uh
we got one coming in
from Rowan
hey yes
you mentioned it before
that the denomination
you grew up in was SDA
I knew some general stuff about that
is relatively common like Saturday Sabbaths
and the particular take on the rapture
what I didn't know until today was that it was a blast
to hear about
they actually sprang out of the militarism movement
and
one of the many doomsday movements that acquired
the humorous nickname of the great disappointment
yeah that's real
can I hazard a guess
that that is like disappointment that the apocalypse
did not occur that's correct
fuck which on its own
has put it up in there as history's
greatest fuck ups go
so can we get into the bible talk
segment that just goes over what militarism was
and sets the Seventh Day Adventists apart
for listeners who don't know
I feel like your personal spin on the story would be
just reading about it keep on figuring it out
Rowan thanks Rowan
I appreciate you
I'll take this one
Jesus
no I'm not going to spin it
I'm not going to fucking go on forever on it
it's really short and simple
is that yeah Seventh Day Adventism before it was
that came from a movement
because there's a dude called William Miller
and William Miller said that
it's Miller time
and you know when Miller time is
Miller time is 1844
oh my god is that the actual
fucking original doomsday
holy shit that's super wrong
calculated
he pulled out
the fucking magnifying glass
and the beakers and he did the science
and he read the texts
and the bible he's like you know what
I figured it out I cracked the code
it's all ending in 1844
1844
and everybody
really really leaned in hard
and they were basically like yeah man
if you're not a Millerist get the who the fuck are you
right you gotta get ready
you gotta get ready that's the whole thing
and people were like
on the edge of their
seats like never before
on the exact date
was I want to say it was like May
something
like May 22nd
or something like that
1840 it was an exact day
and they were saying goodbye to each other
and they were like imagine
if you were as sure
as the sun would rise tomorrow
that it wasn't so I'm gonna point out
I just did a little history check right there
that Miller time
precludes
the founding of confederation
of Canada
by 23 years
so
in Miller time there is no Canada
so the great
disappointment occurs
and everyone goes
BOOOOOO
oh no we're not dead
panic and sweat
and everyone freaks out and goes what what happened
right because this is your whole existence
at this point
you don't have it's 1844
you don't have internet you can't look at your anime
all you have is everyone else you know
that's waiting on the end yeah that's right
because that's what the book says
and then a bunch of different schools
of thought form out of
what went wrong
what happened asks everybody
and a couple people go
um I know
what it is
1844 is
not the end of the
world
that's the closed door
what this means is
we didn't
see the second coming because
that's when the door shut
that sucks
that sucks
that is nightmarish
as a conclusion
for the rapture and for heaven
that is the worst
I can't believe
that
if you have not been
a saved soul up until this point in time
that was the
shutting of the door
and now we're in the final phase where your fates
have been sealed
and all you can do is wait for the true end
what happens to everyone born in 1945 onwards
the door has been
shut
that led so the great disappointment
that sucks
leads directly to the shut door
and that was what most people went on
they're going oh
what we concluded was correct
it's just the process
was different from what we thought
that is just as ridiculous as
fucking predestination with the catholics
that is just as ridiculous as that
uh
ellen g white
has visions
and
basically concludes
after doing the studies
it's serious pat
i just feel like we made a big jump
in tone
ellen g white
studies the great disappointment
and eventually concludes
alongside other people initially
she buys into it
and talks about it a little bit and it's a little bit
embarrassing because
her prophecies later on you're supposed to be
like a prophet can never get anything wrong
well no it's kind of part of the deal
people say well no she didn't really push
she just used the language of the people at the time
to convince them with her points
but that's a point up for
debate regardless uh ellen g white
then goes on and says effectively that
um no what it was is that
okay so in the bible there's a
ceremony that takes place where
um the the the the whole
the head priest goes into the holiest of holies
and it's like a chamber inside of a chamber
and it's where the you know the arc
of the covenant that like the ghost comes out and kills the nazis
yeah that's right okay so
that will actually kill anybody
pretty much yeah so that thing is fucked up
the original place where that thing was
being carried was into the holiest
of holies into inside a chamber with an outer
it's like that place if you go in there you
fucking drop dead you can't handle it it's the presence of god
yeah i know you have to be of a
significant holiness or whatever the gate
around that the curtain around that if you go
in you go in there and it's like that's
already fucking dicey yeah you can't
really be a sinner right
but um you're in your inherent
your inherent sin the
thing that makes you human or whatever can still
be inside of you but the holiest of holies
the big priest we gotta tie a rope around him
because if he goes in and drops dead we gotta
pull his body out that's how that goes
alright so there's a process where eventually
the sanctuary is cleansed and there's a
process where like that thing is sealed
and then everybody he cleanses all
the sins of everybody this feels like
a curse rather
than a blessing the conclusion is that
the version of that ceremony that took
place on earth took place in heaven and
that the closed door wasn't actually the closed
door it was the ceiling
of the sanctuary
of ceremony
and now after 1844
until the end of days we're in the
final days
we're in the final stages no matter how
long those final days last we can
hit 26th
26th century and be running around with
battle angel elita but we are in the
final days at that point
I want to backtrack a little bit because the
Ark of the Covenant fucks me up
oh yeah because the Ark of the Covenant
the Ark of the Covenant is a big God
box that if
you get close to it or you
open it and
you are anything other than
Jesus level pure
you will
instantly die
and this is a
holy object yeah because
you have sin in you that is a dnd
cursed chest
sin like that like come on
sin cannot exist in the presence
that's how it goes
pat
the year is
fucking whatever fuck
14th 13th 11th century I don't know
right the year is way back
when
a gigantic light
falls from the sky
cool and lands
in the middle of a populated city
and a black rock is found
at the epicenter that's cool
2019 what do you call that
meteorite yeah back then
what do you call that sign from heaven
the what have you
what do you do
you create well you may well you got to
make a sword out of it so you can kill that big cobra
motherfucker no no no you build a gigantic
fucking thing around it and you
make it so that like this is now the
holiest place on planet earth
and that's how that goes
right what other knowledge you get anyway
the great disappointment
the closing of the door
et cetera and so on and so forth
that's basically where 7th day
Adventism came from when Ellen G white said
nah it's cool the door ain't
that closed it was
just the fake door upstairs not the
real one down here
I'm gonna start a religion got it
um blackjackin hookers
nah zinu
called paddism okay
alright
get into heaven
by littering
what's litter litter is
is garbage that you throw on the ground what's
garbage anything
anything you want
what's the ground if it's the
the earth the earth outside
are we is the ground
underneath you right now no I'm in a
building
so
anything you throw on the ground
is considered garbage yes right are
you garbage yes if you throw yourself
on the ground yeah that littering yeah it is
yeah then we're all littering yes right
so we're all perfect converts the more
you litter the better haven't you get into
if you stand on the ground then you're always littering
yeah you got to get down to the technical
questions do I yes you do I really
because the theologians captain
plan villain the theologians
need to question the exact nature
of this and how it works and this is the studies
that people thousands of years from now I'll
fucking bullshit it as I go along and I
get the money because people's lives
and
or their ability to keep their
genitals might rely on
you deciding what litter is
I'm just saying it's aluminum
you need to make sure people know what
when you write this down because if you
don't put those details in it's going to
be messy give a couple thousand years
from now give aluminum back to the earth
it's going to get
messy if you don't write the details down
you know those little details that you're kind of going
I don't know right now yeah they become
a problem listen when you fast forward
to the future listen Willie I don't
think you understand when these
when we're how many languages you're going to write
this in one Aramaic is that
the only one are you sure Willie
listen I'll be dead I don't care
I'll be
in littering heaven
don't give a shit
what's coming up
what's coming out
double my cry 5 is still
like 11 days away
count it down
it's really all that was in my mind I'll be honest
that's fine that's okay
DOA 6 had a demo this weekend
I saw some stupid shit
didn't get to touch it but you know
it's coming
it's coming
oh lord it's coming
yeah no so that's
that's a cat fatness index thank you
I don't know what else
is about to drop but
that's fine what's what do you what do you
what
what isn't there isn't there something
that I just saw an announcement for
are you alright yes a god
fuck I was trying to I'm like
I know something just came out
devil engine is out yeah it's out
go play devil engine that's a smug
it's got cool characters
in it that you might
recognize it's not a sleuter
you might like some of the secrets
in that game go play devil engine
it's made by cool people
um
and
solidus is not paying me to say this
but he wants me to say
that pray for the gods is also out there
oh my fucking god he will not
fucking shut the fuck up about pray for the gods
it is infuriating
that's the uh
that's the colossus look and he has convinced me to
never play it I'm gonna have his
incessant bad I'm curious to take a look
I'm curious to take a look it looks like the colossus one
though it looks really really colossus
yeah totally but it was that successful kick
starter I'm never gonna play it no
never well spite that's what you get
sorry man you can
edit a montage of me saying that I'll never play
it
ah
why you gotta be a shit
it's my job
fair enough fair enough what if I click the stop
button then we're done
you
you
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita
nashita