Castle Super Beast - CSB 012: Instanced Bathrooms are High Risk High Reward
Episode Date: April 3, 2019Download for Mobile | Podcast Preview | Full Timestamps It's unfortunate that the children didn't disappear. Honeydick the Cyber Shadow. You can watch us record the podcast live on twitch.tv/castle...superbeast Outro: Devil May Cry 5 OST Nicos Theme Samurai Shodown Metal Revolution Biomutant Man of Medan Space Channel 5 VR Cyber Shadow Wattam My Friend Pedro Afterparty Indivisible Mistover Windjammers 2 Streets of Rage 4 Gravity Heroes The Takeover Speaking Simulator EDF Iron Rain Panzer Paladin Dusk Zarvot Heterotopias in the 1989 Future Mortal Kombat 11 Rad Colt Canyon Samurai Gunn 2 One Step From Eden SkateBird Iratus: Lord of the Dead  BioWare Responds to Kotaku Article on Anthem's Development Samurai Shodown reveals its first new character in years with Darli Dagger Heavy Rain, Beyond: Two Souls, and Detroit: Become Human coming to PC via Epic Games Store R-Type Final 2 announced for PS4 Asscreed 3 side by side are a doozy Hyper light drifter tv?! Final Fantasy VII Remake project lead now co-director; Naoki Yoshida division developing large-scale next-gen project
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Ocelot
I
Managed to avoid the Pax box. Oh good. So that's nice
There were I forgot that that was still a thing. There were close calls, but
Someone vomit on your hand and no handoff in time. No, in fact this month
Not month rather this week this year's Pax East. No this month's Pax. I was really impressed with the amount of
hand sanitizer available everywhere and
the
Like germ savviness was like whatever that word is was at its peak
So we had not only the hand sanitizer out at a lot of booths
But there was the wipes for headphones. Oh, that's appreciate what you don't always see you sometimes you get one or the other
But you don't realize that you need both well that reminds me of way back when VR first started getting demoed at E3
In Pax and there was like I think was Pax Prime where like like a hundred people got pink eye move
Yeah, yeah, and they're gross leaking eyeball into the thing
That's the one where it's like it you know exactly what that means. There's no in between
There's no alternative. There's due to bacteria in your eyeball. You've someone shit in your face. There's no
Getting around it. There's no version of it where you're like, oh, maybe like it comes from
Like baby cough people will tell you that people you know, yeah, yeah
It's like, oh, yeah, it comes from like baby coughs and like certain types of fish
Also shit, but don't worry about that. You know, you're like, oh, I got pink eye
But you you got the good one, right? You didn't get the like no one pooped in my ball
No, sir. Oh my god. There's just no mistaking it. I'm never putting on a match. I got a headset at a goddamn event
It's it's yeah, they had the wipes. It was nice. That was good
The I mean any and any dubious moments or questions like I had one night where I was like, oh, I'm not feeling super great
But like you just fucking Tylenol cold and flew that shit. Mm-hmm non drowsy you throw it in there
You know, and you just you soldier on through
the extra day is
Kind of nuts and I think anyone who's there
As a guest is gonna like enjoy getting that extra day because it is true that you're you're at line con
Right, you go to packs. That means you're fucking lining up and you're not getting to see
You're like basically it's like a ratio system, right? So an indie game is worth ratio one. Oh, man, right?
a triple a is like
Depending depending like so an indie game is worth a ratio one
That game that's not indie, but you happen to care about
That's particular. Yeah is like ratio two. Mm-hmm, you know or like a multiplayer kind of like party game with four people
You know, that's a ratio two right there
There's that like
highly anticipated
Indie or not indie type of game like your bloodstained and your indivisibles
Let's those are gonna be my god, dude. You know what some people call that shit?
Triple I triple I triple I is the makes me want to fucking bar. So there's triple I games
But triple I games also go hand-in-hand with
smaller games that have infinite demo time, right?
Where or games where there's no cutoff point you can just the turnover is the below the turn out the below's right?
The turnover is 20 to half an hour or more in some cases an hour all the lines only like five people long
Yeah, they're there the whole day, right?
And then the fucking person with the cutoff point is already standing behind the first person that walks up, you know
So, yeah, those are the games where you get like four or five people a day
And then there's your triple a's where you're like you're at your Nintendo booth and you can't do anything else that entire day
Yeah, I decided to look at a Nintendo. Yeah, you have you have
four slots per day and you choose your groove
And this
Pax is held under the free ratio system
So you can choose how you want to spend those blocks and fit them
But you can only get one big booth or four indie booths. I remember and some in-betweens
we went to the Pax Prime like two three years ago and
We ended up getting those fucking passes that let us get in like an hour early and
Of the three hours split among three days
I
Saw more than twice as much shit in that time than the entirety of the rest of the weekend. Yeah in
The in the the the the witching hour. Yeah. Yeah, it's no lines exactly
And wait wait wait a second who allowed hunger to join the tournament
Oh time to give up that middle line spot or wherever you were around the point of the day where you're like
I'm gonna collapse if I don't consume food and
You got to go figure that situation out
Which you can quite frankly go and get like the stuff down on the floor that's
Like might as well be served off the floor and it's expensive or you can walk up to the food court area
Where hey you just lost a block if you want to eat something decent because I haven't I have so like
My advice to you is to just go somewhere else for breakfast and just have one really really big meal
Yeah, that you parcel out in your stomach over the rest of the day, but that gives you a different line later
Yeah, in fact, I would I would supplement that with a
Corner store run with some jerky and drinks in your bag so that you can just
Feast on little snack. It's little snack ooze as you need to
But for the most part you're kind of stuck in line
So that fourth day exists to give people that chance to get a couple more games in
I'd never tried the hey man. I don't know if you hey guy from a line. I don't know if you know this but
My name's woolly. I'm from Castle Super Beast. You know, I really I it's really important
I'll have you cover this game. Well, I'll have you know that I had a content creator badge
Oh, and that allowed anything that is you get in on the first day for a little further the the hour before
The first day only yeah fuck and I mean if you talk to people that are at booths
Then you kind of be like hey, I'd like to record some footage or something
They'll probably be willing to yeah, but the whole like spirit of packs is meant to be that it's not like
Shows that are not for the viewers. Yeah, well those shows don't exist anymore
But that so like you when you go to the whole thing where they're like
We wanted a show for the game for the players and not for the press so that the press can come in and like always just get
Precedent into people who want to play get like shafted packs is meant to not be that so they'll never do stuff where you get too much power
I suppose by being an
Influencer I spent my whole life hoping that there would be more shows that the average smuck like me could get in and now that I
Finally have the ability to get credentials to the events that
Keep those the uprising out. Yeah, no longer exists
No, the uprising is now and then the time has come so that everyone can get a time to play and you're not special anymore
No special treatment special right at the end. Yeah, I mean it's fine ultimately like what it more
It doesn't it doesn't affect like that like what it mostly affects is just you know when
You go talk to a dev
Right and you go. Hey like would you have like half an hour some time later today to just sit down and talk about your game or
Something that'd be like, yeah, sure. Yeah, you know that makes sense because they know that there's possible promotion involved in that but
But anyway, so that Thursday is a killer for like
work purposes, I suppose just the the extra time on foot and whatnot because
Every day usually ends with like a desperate need for a nap as soon as six o'clock rules around and
This time around I made it to like 430 and I was like, oh fuck. No the life bar is getting shorter and shorter each time
we're old now and
We're in our thirties
Yes, but it's also an extra day
No, it really because you're distributing the same amount of energy over four instead of three days
Yeah, and it's just it's taking a lot. It's taking a lot out of you. It was a good
It was a good show. It was a good. It was a good. Yeah, that's good. Um, I
I you know, I hadn't been in a couple so I missed a few
Took an opportunity to just do the little walkabout upstairs to just to see the extra rooms and whatnot
and
Yeah, they had their stuff going on as well
But you know for a lot of the folks that were like, hey like you're gonna come up to the casuals room and get some games in and stuff
No, like
What time do I have for that? It's kind of like it's kind of it's the same mentality as
The gigantic line of people lined up to play Kingdom Hearts 3
And I'm looking at it going but you just could do that home
But and then you and then I realized wait no
These are people that haven't bought it yet
Yeah for various reasons possibly can't afford it that are like well
I want to get my time on it now that I can that's because I can't afford it right otherwise
You just bought it instead of going to packs. Well, you got more value perhaps per hour
I don't know. I don't know depends on whether whether you like it or not
That's how you feel about the darkness
But the point remains is that that's the kind of thing is for some folks too
It's kind of like yeah, the game's out, but I like I wouldn't get a chance to touch it
And that's a different version of there was a an old rant
That
Gershman over a giant bomb went on about going to E3 and walk and looking at people walking around with fucking t-shirts and shit
And it's like you're not supposed to be here
You're wasting everyone's time and then I went to E3 and saw motherfuckers like in this
What looked like a two three hundred person line to get into some fucking raffle for luigi hats
And I'm like get out right right get the fuck out
Yeah
I mean there's certain there's some games that like
Figured that out nice and quick because like evil thing like there's there's games where it's like
Yeah, like if they have they have the merch or like in one case there's a game that had
Depending on how well you progressed in the demo you'd get different levels of prize packs
Including like just a shirt or a shirt plus
Baggie
Cleric based invisible
They gave me a shirt
But then they also let me pose with the weapon at the standee right which looked ridiculous because they're bigger than me
Yeah
So so just that level alone where you can get you're based on your demo time
You can complete it and get like different rewards of pins up to other things
Met that line was extremely busy because it didn't matter what the game was
Yeah, they really need to
I don't know maybe that they put the merch in so that people go to the line and see the game
It's just my idea they should have a merch pit
Right separate. Yeah, you know a different building cut into the uh to the tabletop section going in the back there the place that
I kind of like you guys can play tabletop anywhere
You can play it in your imaginations. There's a look at the tabletop section. God bless. You don't really need a real table
like there's a lot of like like uh
Set ups as falls and whatnot, but like most of it is just people playing
As opposed to like them like promoting the new stuff and you're kind of like yeah
Am I maybe you could put these tables anywhere? I'm like wildly out of touch
maybe I'm like
Completely out of touch with the average gamer spirit, but whenever I go to a con
That has that kind of like event structure or not event structure, but you know like it's a it's a it's like a half trade show
Yeah, and I walk by like the 3ds pit or whatever it is and it's like hey
We're all just chilling and playing 3ds games like we totally could have done at home without flying halfway across the country to do
Yeah, I am like
Struck with amazement at the the but I'm befuddled. Um, I mean I probably have some answers because as as someone who's done
a convention as
uh
Like a guest as an attendee as a cosplayer
Uh, have you ever worked as staff? Yeah, you have uh, I've done all sides of the coin
So I've seen what cons are like and trade shows are different, but
Um, there is
Very different types of attendees that go for very different purposes and some folks are there for for example
Mainly cosplaying with friends that make sense hanging out with people they haven't seen in a while and street passing
Are the the top of the priority list? Um
In other cases, it's I'm here for some panels
To see some signings of like stuff that I care about or whatever or get do some signings of stuff I care about
and like
Yeah, like a local performer of or not local, but um
Uh, someone is going to be in the jam space space playing music. So it's like the event's happening
I have become a jaded old businessman. There's people that are there not for the the actual booths of the new games and that like
Dude, I remember I was so frustrated at E3 because there were people just walking around having a good time
And I was like get out of my way
Sure
Yeah, and I go to I went to pax and there were and pax is for walking around having a good time
And I'm like a fucking move
I'm working
Yeah, that's the but but the point of pax is fuck you workers
We matter too, right? And so riff raff out of here and the other bit too is there's the there's the uh, like
The the big old cash family
Like rolling in with the strollers and and whatnot just going like hey a local boston event's happening
Let's take the kids all down to the convention center. We we've done the pax thing every time it's come around
It's a good old day for the kids
So there's that as well, you know, you know what?
I'll tell you all of that rolled in together equals a massively profitable successful event. I'm sure
You know that reminds me of it reminds me of game spot. Sorry game stop horror stories
Of parents that would treat game stops and eb games like babysitting services. Yes
Like just drop the kids off. They'll play the demo. They'll play the demo for and then the kids disappear
Because of course they do. Where's our kids? I don't know or worse. Watch your kids, bitch or worse. They don't disappear
worse
Much worse so, you know, yeah, um
But anyway, the uh
The that that killer thursday was a bit rough
But I think the structure of this podcast is going to be a little bit wild and wacky because obviously
Extra day later because of uh all the shit going on. You have a list
I have a list, right? And I mean, there's obviously there's the stuff we've done
There's what we've been up to there's a list of all the things I got hands on with and I have a big old
Uh, you know pax cast splurge to to to
Surf down then there's the actual bits of news that popped up this week, which there's a couple
There's one big one that I I dragged in right last second. Yeah, and I have some, uh
I have I I want to do a very brief
Uh dmc five
Ending spoiler cast type thing. Where do you want to do that in the podcast later?
But I but I yeah, I just want to talk about that a little bit briefly
It's a little bit weird to do it before it's out live on
Whatever, but I have some time as convoluted that I might as well commit to tape now because now they're fresh now
They won't be fresh later. Yeah. Um, for example, when I had big old rants about dangan rampa, uh,
Whatever, whatever
That's gone now. It's gone. I can't I can't just kill the children
But but yeah, it's mainly just on a few quote by woolly madden
It's mainly just on a few particular deep or well. No the actual quote was it's unfortunate that the kids don't disappear
If you want to really get so unfortunate
There is a few thoughts on particular things. So it's not it doesn't necessarily have to be the complete spoiler cast
I dare you not to make that the podcast title
Who the fuck am I
Who the fuck am I? Have you seen what we've been running with? Was there any what is there to lose at this point?
Are you right?
um
so
I guess we might as well just like, you know go into like
All right, you know what you got going I'll grab it because I I don't have that much of excitement
I only have a couple things to talk about
Uh, me and my pal fuggins bit the bullet and caught up on the mcu wet and saw miss marvel
There you go. Sorry captain marvel. Yep. Yeah. Um, it was okay
I I enjoyed it fine enough
um
I it was better than I expected but not by much
it's fine
It was fine
Like I came away with that going that movie was a total waste of my time
But I'm not worried about this character's inclusion in a larger ongoing story because new and
New writers with more script time will help this
Uh, but that's it. So then went home watched ant man on the netflix the second of the ant people
Paul rod is amazing. I love Paul rod so much
The casting of michael douglas is the best
Casting of anyone in the mcu as as I almost as michael douglas. No as hank pym
Um
That's that movie's fine
It's I still say robber downy as fucking stark is the greatest so old and grumpy
But he made that but he was that i'm that's that is on the level of of fucking uh, maybe I just really like michael douglas
Um
Picard Xavier like it really really yeah, no, that's the best one. I that's the nothing's it's not mcu, but it's still like
Yeah, not yet
Um ant man's a fun ant man too or whatever in the lost. Uh, that's fun
It's a little whatever
Uh, did you see it? Mm-hmm
A plus ending. Yeah a plus plus ending
Um, like that movie's yeah, michelpa fiffer is there michel fiffer
But yeah, that's like that movie's like a seven and a half and it's like a fun time
And it's got like a 10 as an ending fantastic. It's it's like it made me so excited
And do you remember the time frames for when the movies came out? Yes, I do. Okay, so that's important. Yeah, perfect. Yeah
um
Aside from that, uh, I got a new video card because I hate having money and it made the game go fast
2080 ti is assuredly a big ass waste of money
Did it did it make the game go?
It made the game go big fast. Did they make it make it make it go faster big go faster. Yes. Okay. Um
Dabbled around and stuff here there
Uh playing roguelikes this week, but that's mainly because gunjins getting an update. Yes
But the main thing that I did I guess was that I beat Sekiro
Like beat it beat it beat it. Mm-hmm, and then I beat new game plus. Mm-hmm
um
That game is fantastic
once
Which is different from every from software game that has come out in the past like 10 years
Yeah, so I saw the uh, the idea is that the run is now
optional, but sometimes the boss is also optional it is
laughable how much of that game you can skip
so
Say you beat new game, right? You got all your prayer beads, right? So you got all the health upgrades
Well, now you don't need to fight a single mini boss in the game other than the ones that cause fog doors
You don't have to fight any enemies in the game at all except for the ones that are next to the mini boss that has the fog door
And um, you don't have to fight anyone that doesn't have a cutscene pretty much
So like I got
Most of the way through new game plus in like three and a half hours
There you go, and there's two versions of new game plus one is
Uh, fuck you hard mode
Which changes mechanics they make it so that if you don't perfect parry something you take chip damage
And the other is any other is just right? No, no. Well, that's for whatever
Yeah, uh, but the other thing is just kind of a standard new game plus enemies are juiced a little bit, but not not much
okay, um
that game on replay
suffers
incredibly from having one weapon
and
Very little skill variation and no builds like that is a
Action game sent you. Yeah. Yeah, and the other thing is that once you know how to beat those bosses
Fuck them
because
They they can get fucked. They're no problem
and
Like going through new game plus without the difficulty thing was boring and
Like I've been arguing with people about the difficulty in this game like literally all week
That gameplay sucks if it's not hard
Like it is tedious and dull
If it is not challenging you well, so what a tension game would do would be give you it would give you traps
right to interrupt while
The the the enemy pathways while still being stealth and and then it would also give you an optimal path
It would also have like missions like proper missions. It would have missions, but I'm saying but the missions would have
like paths where you could it's you know with
Excellent reactions and skill and movement and understanding of what the vision cones are
Uh, completely stealth take down the entire route and then get in and finish it
So let me let me paint which is again a european extreme. Let me paint a picture for you
You know in devil may cry or metal gear rising or any proper action game
um
You uh, you get into an enemy arena and the fucking evil
Demon gate closes around the arena. Yeah, and then you have to kill the monsters
Yeah, now or you think about a dark souls where like the layout of the physical space means the enemy's bodies are literally
Physically blocking you. Yes
Imagine if you gave the chosen undead and dark souls one like trickster in dt level movement
and you could just
double jump and
air dash past
Every enemy the whole way down to blight town and then fight the bot like
Speed runs of that game
We're already coming in under 50 minutes and like those are ones with deaths in them
because and and every boss fight like
Can come down to learning the perfect parry timing on everything. Oh, yeah
If you if you so, you know how you damage bosses, they regenerate posture more slowly. Yeah
Yeah, if you perfect everything you can ignore that exactly
So the so the line is clear, you know, like like in every racing track. There's the line
Yeah, the the driving line. Yeah, the line is clear in Sekiro
Sprint this way and parry everything and that is how you
And it's a bummer because like I had a lot of fun playing dark souls one as a mage as a cleric
as a big guy as a fast guy as a stabby guy as a whatever
And I could I could still go back now and try some other bullshit
And same thing with all the other souls games and bloodborne less bloodborne, but
Right and this like I beat it and I'm gonna beat the the bosses that I missed because of a different ending
And then I'm gonna try the harder mode, but like the replay value is just not there
You know what this is like, I don't know if you I mean I might not have caught it
But like yeah on the first stream when I for the first time I played it
I'm like that's that became immediately apparent
Yeah, the first thing you realize is like you're playing a character
This is a there is a story and there is a there's cutscenes. There's things have people talk
Yeah, and and and you say things and whatnot, but like there's no
Like giant world mystery to dive into and there's no other people to connect to to show off while you try to figure that all out
Yeah, it's not that game. This is a much more normal traditional action. It's much more normal and it's just
It just it's like the combat feels so good
Yeah, it's through the lens of souls difficulty and and Miyazaki doing what he wants to do
The removal of of like stats gives it a weird feeling
Well most stats because like in dark souls is like I know what I have to do
But sometimes your stats or your gear or whatever can give you problems that you then have to deal with right?
Yeah, or you vary it up here
It's like I know what I have to do and then you just do it
Yeah, and I like you will you can never
go back to fighting that boss
The again you can only go back to
intentionally limiting yourself
Or kind of crushing it
So if they wanted the game to have the things that you're describing if it was intended to be that design wise
The shinobi prosthetics would not be those they would be replacements for your sword
Yeah, right the the lack of a different weapon is probably the but I don't know how you would even change that
Because you need to be able to parry everything at a certain speed. You need to be able to
Right. Yeah. Well, I mean you well
Basically what I'm saying is well the parrying mechanic would be separate from the weapon
Is what it wouldn't be like all the swords doing it all the time and be like whatever you'd have a fucking parry arm
But um, but yeah, you would have this thing where you're like, oh, I want to equip the cannon as a
Primary style. I want to equip the ninjas the ninja stars as a primary style
Yeah, you know and like you'd go through the game with these builds, but
Because like that's not what they wanted like you you've seen you know the the the guy in the intro
A genichiro, right? You fight him later, right? Of course. That's the best boss fighting the game
It's amazing. Sure. I can't enjoy it anymore
Because he has a really long combo that if you block if you perfect parry every hit
He goes down
Like right like straight up. Huh? Okay, and the other best boss fight in the game. Uh, you might have seen it in a trailer
It's a big giant ape. It's a big white ape. That's like a bloodmore monster. Maybe seen a clip of it. Yeah, um
That boss fights amazing. Okay
Like that there's like it's not a fight anymore because I know the time like
So, uh, one of the trailers shows uh shows like a bull thing and uh
Yeah, so like that's one of those ones where um
There is
Your perception of what that fight is. Yeah, and then the moment you realize what it actually is a very different fight
Becomes completely different and easy becomes super easy
But like your fears of what that actually is are like only gonna happen once
You know, so yeah, it is a game that is front loaded with like
um
The the the unknown is what makes it difficult
The unknown is this challenge and and usually in from software games the unknown is like a fucking suite of
Like asinine systems
That make no sense
Right, and then what does this stat do nothing? Why does the stat do nothing?
Right. Why does this item do literally nothing?
And and then once you've gone through that and you've gotten used to what those are
You start trying to figure out what the best way to apply them would be or whatever
And and and Sekiro says no here's the perfect solution and it doesn't have to be that it's it's it's allowed to be its own type of game
It's a lot to be something that it kind of bums me out because like when I played dark souls one
I still now
eight years later
Have value in being able to play dark souls one. Yeah, and I went through dark souls two like
Eight times and I went through three like four or five times
I went through Bloodborne like four or five times and my like total time with that was measured in like six months to like years
Yes, and now once I get I'm gonna do the the the extra new game the the fucking other ending
I'm gonna just put Sekiro back on the mental shelf and be like that was good
And kind of forget about it in a couple months. Um, it's it's the place that like any other tenshu game would go
And you'd go back through it a couple times with the extra difficulties to see what's going on, you know
But I think that you know, it's not a world that you you go to live in and I think that's okay
But you it is true that it's like if you want to just go down to the
Dollars to time ratio, you know, it's not that it's not not dollars to time
But like the point is is how much of
This game is how much of this game's content is going to take space in your real estate in your brain
And how much time you know how long is it going to live there and like in some cases it's like this
It's going to be a much shorter. I do think however
The other soft games comparison to tenshu is a little like off
In that tenshu was a stealth game that occasionally had fighting
This is a fucking action game that occasionally has stealth. Yeah, like that's the core
That is the core like this is I feel like the closest in modern parlance would probably be like ninja guidance
Like the old ninja guidance. Sure. Like you go through a level and you fight your fucking ass off. Yeah, but
Ah, you know, I just
It's a bummer
And it's a weird situation because it's a great game, but I'm kind of bummed out that
There isn't more like there is like the the the storyline is like
Overwhelmingly straightforward. Yeah, which is like there is nothing here to discover
This is the deal how that guy come back to life because of this now
There's other ways there's other ways to make your game more replayable that then the established, you know soul series ways to do it
Um, would have been interesting to see
any of those, you know, but this is also the kind of game where
Uh, you know when it comes off the shelf when uh, when the old hunters comes out
Yeah, you know when they just go, yo, we added a new zone and it's a new
Like site. That's a new story. Yeah, we need some boxes
You beat that. Yeah, there's there's room for that. There's definitely room for that
No, I mean like there are specific characters that are mentioned like oh man that
Tom away was the most badass sword bitch ever. Where is she? I don't know. Yeah
Like us. Yeah, there's there. I feel like there's ample room for like
Um, just areas to to add to that fucking uh, bonfire list. Yeah, where you just go like, all right
Yo, dlc come check out this new area with some new boss fights and
Someone that fucks with the parry system as you know it. Yeah, you know and makes you go. Oh shit every second
Sekiro would actually like hilariously enough benefit from like a bloody palace mode
Where it remove it removes the environment and it's just like go in there and you fucking fight some dudes
Just deal with the deal with crowds
And with that, I guess I'll move over to dmc. Hey bloody palace came out. Yeah, it's fine
Uh, there's I have some nitpicks on that shit. I heard some people are bummed out about some stuff
Uh, it doesn't have co-op and it doesn't have Virgil
So that's a bummer, huh?
For me the biggest bummer
is that
You beat the stage and then it is the slow pan of the portal opening up and you have to hit start every time to skip it
Like it was before. Yeah, I hate that. I don't care. Well, that's I should kill every enemy
And it should fight or give me an autoskip option, but it's tedious. That's
That's bloody palace. I don't know what to tell you. There's no reason to have it
Just have the fucking thing load in and let me skip right ahead
Or just even better jump me to the next floor instantly minor point. Sure
Um, you actually know because you uh, sometimes well personally I I sometimes would like test shit out and do things
Well, luckily no, you haven't touched it then
No, okay, because they have added two features
That negate the need for that. Okay, which is warm up. Yeah, which is fight any floor
You've ever gotten to yeah to warm up and practice on right and the second is they have added suspend
You can get to floor 80 go. I need to go to work
And stop the timer and and and hit and and fucking leave like palace and it will save the game
Oh, that's cool. That's great. That's nice. Which is great because a full run takes a
Yeah, it still takes a while. It takes a while and I had you to pause it and walk away for the day
Yeah, absolutely. Um BP seems
Way easier than it used to be. Huh
I on my first try with Dante got more than halfway through. Okay
And on my third or fourth try with nero
I got to like stage 40 which is farther than I would used to get like well on attempt one of
DMC four bloody palace. Yeah, so DMC four bloody palace like I feel like
First try you hit the upper 20s to 30s. Yeah, and then you're like, ah
I also had this the situation of like I hit Goliath at the floor 19 the first time, right?
Whatever is nero and then I'm like, oh right. Yeah, I don't remember how to play this at all because it's been
Going hard on Sekiro for a week. So that's the other question is like how much have you internally absorbed these boss fights
Not as much as the Sekiro ones
Ironically enough because it was like over a month ago now. Yeah, and DMC allows you to make more mistakes. Yes
It just you don't get to style. No
Huh you can style a little in DMC. Sorry in in Sekiro. No, no, no
I mean, I mean, no, I'm saying the punishment
The the reason why you feel bad in DMC is because you're not styling. Yeah, not because you're dying
I got a couple cool the hits and
Okay, so but you beat it. No. Oh, okay. No
Uh, the way that it works is it starts at devil hunter and then you go through like 30 floors
And then it kicks it up to son of sparta and then he kicks it up to dmd
Oh
So it gradually goes through each difficulty as you but the first 18 floors are like
Laughable like there's and like
Um, so, you know the part I was just complaining about hitting start. Yeah, there's a different problem
Which is you are spending. I shit you not 15 seconds or less on every one of those stages
So you hear the first like
Subhuman yeah for like
Eight nine minutes in a row. Okay. Well talk about months of
Like that was months on months should just keep rolling
And you should not have to hit. Uh, there'll be a mod somebody make a mod
Pat baby can play
Okay, uh
Also, I mean how much how much bloody palace did you do in previous entries for?
Uh, how much did you actually did you in three? I never touched it
Okay, because I didn't
I didn't care okay, and four I tried a couple times
I think the highest I got up was like 70 or 80 with narrow because these are these are all things that like
Yeah, bloody palace. Yeah, these are annoyances that should have been fixed. Yeah, but they were that's what it was. I guess the uh
They could be better without it. I don't disagree the quality of life there and those little things could have been better
Um, so what I felt like mission. I guess through whatever seven whatever the one was three warriors
I felt like that was like your test reverse bloody palace was your jumping down these holes and getting into the fights with the with your co-op buddy
Uh, the thing I thought about co-op this time around was that if it was in it would have to be a separate
Oh, yeah system because you could just let someone else do the work for you
All the way through and that shouldn't net you a reward
So
That's not there now. No
It's gonna be an s.c. The data miners are finding like
Player slots for like Trish and lady and shit. It's like
There's a special place though, especially with this and apex now where
Um, what is there what what is there to be said about like expectations based on data mining?
You know where it's like we never officially told you to expect shit
You might be looking at stuff that we went. Oh, that's not gonna work and fucking stopped it
and it'd be super cool if it was there, but the the
There's a whole thing. That's rough. You know, it's a weird new world
We're in where like you see things and you go
Oh man, that might be that and then it goes from that might be that to like, holy fuck
I know it's gonna be that I can't wait for that and then and then like the community will get hyped together about that thing
That was never announced
So that expectations become a whole I don't know what to do because in the dmc 5
situation
You put player number to 4 and virgil comes in and he has a real move set and he has button mapping
Oh, yeah, so you're right. So that means and it's like so that means it's coming or it was there and then it wasn't
and it's like
What do you fucking think? But you know you and and like I've talked to didn't didn't souls bosses have functioning buttons
Assigned to it. So that was the craziest discovery ever. That's what i'm scanning at, right?
You're like, does that is that a sign that oh, they were going to make playable boss? No, that was a dev test thing
So you have to figure out a way. Yeah, totally
But the the reality of is that people expect virtual to be playable at some point in this in this game. I agree
So like you have to work within those expectations. It just might not be with this update and the other yeah, but the other thing
It's like
Depending on what it is. It's like this is an expectation people may or may not have already had
and then
You know
Like this is one of the things I've argued with people for and there's some people that uh, whatever it's like
You know people are going to dig into your game
If there's a single scrap of code that says
Virtual bloody palace in it someone's going to find it. Yeah
So you have to acknowledge that that may lead into expectations. Yeah, and and and I think like
I think there definitely is something to
To be said there's a way to go about programming and develop game development nowadays and asset creation in particular
There's a way to go about it in a new world where you're like if it's on the disc it can and will be found
I remember um, so you have to actually consider like consider that you're developing in a transparent environment
People can see the whole thing. They will find out how the sausage was made
Do you remember the re5 and re6 demos in which people were able to
Figure out what every level and boss and weapon was in both of those games from their demos
No, because the they just the the file structure was there the files weren't they just told they just told
So like when re5's demo came out people were like there's going to be boss fight with with wesker and gel
There's going to be a boss fight against this. There's going to be boss fight in a volcano. There's going to be etc
etc
So if the team is doing that for their sake of like production efficiency
Right, and that's how they get shit done
And like it just also happens to be really really easy for data miners to conclude what they can from that stuff
then
you know, it's like
The team I guess would would hopefully then go forward and reflect
That like hey, maybe we could do a better job obfuscating this information
Yeah, maybe you know
But the the first one is the funniest because it's not under like enemy count or enemy control
It's under player playable character number
And you change like a single value
But but the fact is that like you we never know why
Like the game is built up the way it is
You know, there's always things that happen that are just like
Yeah, you're you weren't privy to like a massive discussion about something that needed to be checked or whatever the fuck the case was, right
Also, I'll say this
Personally as someone who was in in in that world
What I would do a lot of the time
Depending on how early we got onto a project we would sometimes if
The devs were awesome
Would we literally have a meeting where they'd be like, all right
So our tools team is now designing debug, right?
So
We've got some standard stuff that we do with every game that whatever we debugged on old games
We're carrying forward at you
We're going to carry those tools forward because they already exist
Sure
But if there's anything specific you guys want that you think you're going to need for test
Let us know. Oh, that's very and we're going to make these tools for you, right?
That's what that department is supposed to do. Uh, it's fucking great. It's so cool
So what ends up happening is like this game will be like built off of the back of something that was previously established
Right, it'll sometimes have leftover debug options from the previous thing. Yeah
That might not be as useful this time around but nonetheless because it is the same bones and structure
It's in there, right?
So something like mapping to the boss controls on on a fucking souls game
Yeah, like let's say imagine that as a legacy thing carried forward because it's just armored course
Because any boss we put into this game is going to go through that system
And then in addition to it the tools team other the qa team asks for some specific testing tools and then
They don't always necessarily get used
Right something might change something whatever but early early on in
They requested to get these things in to make testing easier
Down the line in the future for whatever purpose and and so it ends up being there
But it doesn't necessarily represent future content. It's just a part of test
So there's all kinds of crazy reasons why these things will end up in the final
Code that someone's data mining and then the assumption is that it's going to be content later
So let me but it gets wacky. Let me ask you a question that I I certainly don't have an answer to
Say you're uh, matt walker at capcom, right?
And you know bloody palace. I know that virgil's actually player four. That's not what i'm referring to. I'm talking about situations like this
Yeah, but let's let's take this one as example. Say you're matt walker over at capcom, right?
You know, virgil's not coming out with a bp update
But you know people think he's yeah, what do you?
Because the the answer that everybody's gone with is like you just don't really say anything and and if people are disappointed
What do you do internally? You're like, well, they disappointed themselves. Uh, right? Well, this is
This is where modern day community managing and modern day
Marketing departments have a brand new puzzle to solve
I don't even know how to approach it. There's a brand new task ahead
And you need people that are fucking good at their jobs to figure it out because i'm not that guy
I don't know what you do. I don't know you put out a fucking statement
You're just going just make every making sure for everybody
Um, the update will not contain very yeah, like you can't be high people
You can't you know what I mean? Like I think I think what you see sometimes like for example with apex
There was like reddit posts that would come out with um, you know, whatever the when the the season started or whatever
And then they'd be like, okay, so
Uh, here's what we're talking about this time around. Here's our thought process on how we're making things
Here's what we'd like to do going forward and hopefully saying all of those things in a positive in that sort of way
We'll give you an idea about what you're not going to get this time. Um, the apex guys actually can't there was one guy
I went on reddit who was like, listen, you guys found a bunch of shit a lot of that shit's really old
Yeah, it hasn't been in test for years. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah
No for sure and I feel like that's probably the best way is like
Is like just straight up
I I feel like the best way would be to be honest and be like hey guys
I know you found virgil as a playable character
Uh, and you can play as him that was
Done in the in dev to make sure that the the boss fight felt like it was a real person
Yada, yada, yada, right and and then a bunch of people that have no idea that are just like
cold
Like whatever you want to call it like outside oblivious. Oh upside the loop, but super are in there
What are you talking about?
You know, I'm listening to the official word the official word says what how do it's a weird new world
And it's very difficult and I don't envy that it's it's a hard way to go about fucking
Like you gotta be honest
But you can't make the current thing you're doing or the current plan you're on
Seem like shit even as and I guess the only real way to win is to always
Exceed expectations even as like a big asshole consumer
Who's hyper consumer pro whatever fucking right who's all like gimme gimme give now, right?
Yeah, I look at this and go. I don't know. What's that? Yeah, because like dmc 5 is like
bursting
Disgusting with content like it is there's so much there are three
Characters that's crazy and all I can think of is how pissed I am that I don't have the fourth
Expectations based on nothing
Based on nothing. We've talked about this. We've talked about this already a couple times and
like the yeah this this really weird place of
Getting hype over. Yeah, I don't know man. It's weird. Is it stupid but but like
People you do have to kind of be like guys if you got like in your own head
To some degree you you got to take the blame and the other thing and this is the the bummer, right?
Is like let's take capcom as an example
The other thing is that there's always that element of like but what if they're full of shit though?
Like they were with the characters in cross Tekken
Yeah, well cross so cross Tekken is always the standout example
But like I using that as a specific because but companies lie people lie. Yeah. Yeah, like
Game development fucking lies like nothing else
Dude, I'll tell you this if you data mine a bunch of shit and there's no clear answer for it
That's not really really embarrassing and the clean and the least embarrassing answer is just to lie about it
And that's what will happen. Oh, yeah, you know, but
We tried for eight months to get virtual working properly and we couldn't do it
No one wants to hear that no one wants to say that
Right, like that's not what happened. But like could you imagine how fucking bad that'd be? It's like, oh, yeah
Female player characters are way too difficult to an expensive
Yeah, you know what that ubi soft quote only got funnier and funnier and funnier and funnier over time
For a multitude of reasons
It's
It's a tricky one. I don't envy that
modern new
marketing department and community management side of things because
You how do you save people from themselves?
Right. Yeah, how do you save people from coming at you with things that you never like what you say as the company is gospel
And that in general used to be the only thing that mattered, you know, you know, what's a fun little data mining scenario
Okay, new patch comes out for Final Fantasy 14. Don't go to that goddamn subreddit
Because within within minutes of the patch dropping people have ripped every model
Out of the game and gone. Here's what the rewards for every single new
Fight is here's what you get for beating this
Here's the final boss of the new story thing. Here's the mount here and like imagine if
Every single blu-ray that came out
Didn't just have the whole here's the deleted scenes. You didn't see that we've selected
But literally had the entire reel. Yeah, and the entire audio. Here's every take we threw out
Here's all of it. Here's every uncomfortable fight on the set. Here's the crafts table
Yeah
What if every blu-ray included the whole production? Here's every makeup test and creature design we threw in the garbage
Um, you're missing like all you're missing is like the cell phone records
Of the meetings that were held about what should and shouldn't happen with the actors and and and so on in the sequels
But fuck, you know what I mean? That's a that's a thing that would just like video games are in a medium that can escape that
It's it's the craziest thing ever because everything else is allowed to polish itself as much as possible
Yeah, and then just show you a bake of that
Yeah, or like audio of that and that's where hollywood magic comes and that's it and you and there's distance
Because it's not live running in front of you. It's not a breathing system
That's a live in front of you where anything can happen
I think I think the first time that I saw something wild like this was when data miners for dark souls one
Were pulling bosses out from the abyss and were like who the fuck is king jared?
What character is this where were you supposed to fight them?
You look at his oh, he was kind of supposed to be the four kings, but not. Why'd he get scrapped?
And and and and now
Let's be real. Let's go back and look at like anyone who does anyone who's done extensive lore on souls games
who has
Been able to gather facts about locations just based on camera clipping and things like that boundary breaking
Like how much lore exists entirely based on shit that you couldn't possibly know
Well, there's another aspect to that which is like go back and re-translate the original japanese dialogue
outside of the official translation for just a couple extra bits couple extra bits because the Kirby does there were
Yeah, there were localization
decisions that were made that were not actually hyper accurate or clear or
You know
Fucking pull this boss out of nowhere so that you can figure out what the back story for this area
Should have been but then got taken out and was like oh my god. What is what does this character look like under the helmet?
Yeah
Right, what if what if you what if one of these characters?
What if you fucking you clip through solar's helmet and you get these are some a fucking lizard man?
Yeah, that's all man. Then what do we start talking about the secret lizard man origins? Yes, we do. Why?
Because that's cool. But where does that come from? I don't care lizard people. You know, it's it's such a weird fucking world
We live in I I feel like it's video games are stuck with that problem forever and it sucks
Unless everything switches to stadia
In which case you never install any files. Yeah, there's no files. They're local you get you don't get to it's all stream
A consciousness from the cloud bro infinite power of the cloud. We hey crackdown came out by the way
Remember that? Yeah, the game the last game that would use the infinite power of the cloud. Yeah, just came right and went
Damn, yep, terry cruise. It was okay. I guess I didn't hear anything good about it at all. Did terry cruise do his thing?
Yeah, he was there I guess
Okay, well, you know
Um, yeah, that's that's that's that's that's a fucking headscratcher that people will solve that will be smarter than us
Because I don't know what you or they won't
Or they won't solve it
Maybe they'll just come out and say
hey
No matter what you maybe maybe there's a message that you put up that's nice and and front-facing that comes right after you sign
the the agreement and it just says
Anything that comes from not us
is
Not canon or like
You're you're a stupid if you get excited for something we didn't tell you about
Uh, you know, they find a way
Yeah, they find a way to tell people right out the bat to just like hey
For all official news and updates tune into this place
And if it doesn't have the jp mark then it's extinct
Of course it is it's the files of the production and you go. Oh cool. There's gonna be a dlc
But we're now in a world where it's no longer that because it's also filled with nonsense
Yeah, well and we don't know how to parse between them and the devs are not going to step inside and go
Here's what the nonsense was and here's what our future plans are but our marketing plan
Yeah, this hopefully will lead to the future that I desire which is no marketing plan. Just tell me everything
I don't tell me everything right away. You would hate it. You would hate it. Yes. Would I you would hate it?
How why you would hate it because you don't realize
And I can I'm talking to you and I'm talking to you
You're talking to me as somebody who's never worked in the business. You don't realize how much you enjoy
The anticipation of things moving at a pace that has you waiting for more
I disagree. I I go into every possible information topic ever
And while everyone around me is complaining about how the data miners and the leakers have spoiled everything
I'm like, I don't care. I just want to know
how about this
you don't realize that
Even though you're impatient for more news, right and let like it feels really great when you get that news
You don't realize the opposite end of where uh, it's it's not even about like
Things are cool now and it would be so much better if I had it
It would be like if this gets ruined then I feel worse about the same thing
Like you don't realize that like you might feel worse about something you wouldn't have felt
That can you give me a specific example here because I'm a little confused as to what you mean. Um, I mean like, uh
Like they say that this game's gonna have x feature and then that feature gets cut and they just straight up tell you
Oh, yeah, that feature got cut for time and then I'm going oh damn. I would really like that feature
I mean, that's a simple one right where I will never ever stop thinking about
metal gear rising
wall running. Yeah
and
You know in that case, I mean that was publicly revealed. That wasn't you know, whatever
But like we the detail catchers hang on and stuff, you know
And yeah, and sometimes you see lies in in trailers and you go like what the fuck was that lie
But like the further it goes in where you like you can sometimes see something that's like, yeah, this
Was actually going to be like something crazy different or something along those lines
I don't know as as somebody in a position and you understand this as well
Who occasionally gets peaks at that world that we're not supposed to
I can't get enough of it. I want to know absolutely every detail of every single part of this business
As soon as it exists. Yeah
Yeah
I mean and then there's the simple part where like in something where the narrative matters
Well
That's slightly a narrative. Yeah there you need that to unveil itself the way it was intended because the writer
Wanted it to come at you in this way that it would have maximum impact
And if things are done out of order then the impact is lessened and thus you walk out going well, that sucked
It's funny because this conversation is very pertinent for a later discussion that we'll be having probably try and keep it in mind everyone
Cool. Um, well, what do you do this weekend a lot? So, okay
Let's try to get through it. I went to PAX and
um
Yeah, I think
For everybody like I said, I would like I just I laid out earlier on in the podcast
What I think the structure of this is going to be but uh, I have like 30 games here that I've I touched
And uh, I'm going to talk about all right. I mean brief three words each
Uh
No, okay
I'm going to talk about them in brief and and kind of go through stuff and then there's there's more general things and whatever
So we'll figure it out the
um
The main thing is uh, uh, some fun stuff happened outside of PAX
Yeah, so as it as it often does that that uh, is worth bringing up
So for one was really fun was like on the first night
went down to uh, um the mixer mixer
and uh
Was talking to some people
and
Okay, so people listening to the audio version can't hear the look on my face, but I'm going to try and sum it up with a word
Okay, well anyway
um, so what we what what ended up happening was, you know
Just never hangouts and saw some friends and saw some people and good times and then eventually at some point, uh
Ended up like having a chat with some
uh skybound employees
Uh, you know former telltale. Yeah, and uh as repeated as I reported on twitter
Someone was able to directly confirm that
When we were playing
Batman
telltale's batman, uh
At the time that we had that the first episode was going up was when they were working on one of the later
uh episodes like I think it was a season two thing and um
The time frame was such that when we matt and I laughed super hard at how
uh
Batman basically walks leaves us leaves the situation in mid conversation and just fucking grapples out
Yeah, and we just went oh my god
This game would be amazing if it had that as an option instead of the ellipses every time
And like we had a huge fucking laugh markout moment
devs saw it
Super went in and had that same situation that occurs way later
Turn the option into you know what fuck it grapple away mid conversation and put that in directly
Based on on uh our shit. So that
Influenced that fucking made my weekend immediately that yeah, it's always wild mind
The that occasionally you hear just like some stupid shit you did like affected anything at all
In some cases and a lot of people when I put the twitter were uh kind of going like what's the source?
I'm like the source is the mouths of the people that worked on the video game
Like me standing in front of them and clinking the glass to be like fuck. Yeah, that was awesome. Thank you
It was great. Yes. I put that in um, so
Uh, that is really really fun
I enjoyed that bit
there was um
A really cool time as well
The next night uh me and my boy the best of bond aka estaban who works with noclip and does a lot of their
Oh, yeah filming and whatnot. Yeah. Yeah. He does some fgc stuff. He does some tech and stuff
He's the guy who fucking uh put
A shot of the channel and one of the noclip documentaries. Yo, he knows. He knows. Yeah. Yeah. He's he's he's fucking out there
And we basically uh went out to
balance patch, which is the name of the local uh
Fgc meetup hangout
So they were having their friday night uh meetup and it was packs. So like obviously shits popping
Yes, whatnot. So went to go see the boston fgc
um
Saw some faces that i haven't seen in a while because some of those guys used to come up to montreal
Uh shout out to lucky d the guy that's running the current scene and like man
One thing one thing will always remain the same is just like
The that that difference of 300 million or so in population
means that
like
a dry day
for america
is
banging
For canada let me check something right now. Let me just check something. What's up? I just want to see the population of boston
okay, right
Because like 300 million i mean not everybody in us is coming out to boston here in the 37 i believe
Maybe i said boston not washington dc you stupid fucking internet because it's kind of just
It's 4.7. It's big. So the popular greater boston area is about five times bigger than montreal
In the same general region. So you expect to see at least five times as many people there
It's just like this is pop it off every game's got its corner doing things and it's you're like
You know there's that like it's the difference between like oh man this game is dead this week
Means there's three guys over there playing versus it's not here. Yeah, right?
Um that one guy rings in the the thing
Yeah, and we felt the same way when we went to novus scotia and the montreal scene got to see the novus scotia scene
It was like
This is is that a cod?
You know, it was a little bit. Is that a cod playing sailor mode? It's flopping on the buttons
Uh
Shit
Oh, no, that's caudal area there. Yeah, well
Knows all the frame advantage. You want a beer? Yeah, so uh
It it's so i always just like i'm like man america you guys like
Like you always got a scene that even when it's not healthy
It looks healthy as a canadian, you know because the numbers are there
But it was really really it was cool to to see and get some games in and play and whatnot. Um
So shout out to the balance patch
a
pleasant evening was spent
having
Drinks and revelry and dinner with one german spy. Oh man
Yes, we still talk like a like a tier two anime protagonist. Yes. Yes. He certainly does
and uh
Yeah, we just went out and had a good time and uh, I got to try to chowda
I got to try to chowda. You tried some chowda. I tried some chowda. Did you hit? Do you have to order it like that?
Do they like that? New england new england fucking clam chowda
with the biscuit in it and everything and uh, you have some cranberry juice
Put the cran- no cranberry juice. No cranberry juice
But I got the chowda and uh, it was good. Did you even run in anybody would talk like that?
That sucks and I went you know, I you know, I even
Had like on my last day. I had some extra time before my flight
So I decided to take a nice slow trip down to the harbour to harbour and I went to go get some dinner and like
I didn't hear anything. So apparently the no accents
I've looked at apparently that accent is kind of on its way out because everybody realizes
I don't know, but it's great for movies and stereotypes. Yeah, I know. I know it's fun
I literally I literally went down to the harbour and I did not
If you live in a fucking part of your country and you talk weird, that's great. Makes you unique and funny
Um, I was talking to somebody the other day of like in canada people in ontario and kebac
Particularly your speakers. They sound pretty like normal canadian
but people out west in the prairies and people out east in the fucking island in the the the
Maritimes they sound like fucking cartoons
Maybe everybody in vostin secretly agreed to just be like, you know what when the thing's in town
Fuck these people for that weekend
When someone comes by and they go, hey, how's it going? Yeah. Hey, hello. Hello. How are you?
Need anything? Can I help you? Right? And then the moment packs is done. They're just like
All the r's go away
But they come in they come back for packs because they don't want to they don't want to fucking give you the the the satisfaction, you know
um, so
Yeah, but no, anyway, that was a really good time with german spy and and we just you know talk shop and did the whole thing
um
Same for fucking like rolling up and catching brennan and zavier
Uh in at the same place at the same time. Are you going to become a pro wrestler as well, woolly?
My time is
Is not now my time has passed. Oh those days are no
Oh, okay, if I would have it would have been
You know, it would have been a while 20 years ago. Yeah, but um, yeah
Man zavier woods and brennan fucking williams in the house and they were they were there. That was cool got to just chill and drink with zavier afterwards and
Like again revelry and fun packs isms, you know occurring
um
And then you know a couple other little bits and pieces and and faces that I saw on the actual show floor
so I had
three games in particular that were
My fucking
Like need to talk about this shit
The the the impact and I don't know if I should front load or or say for later. I'm gonna front load them
Y'all, you don't want to back load them. I'm gonna I'm gonna reload it in the back reverse backload them
Okay, right from three to one. Okay, and I'm gonna go from four all the way. Okay. That makes no sense
But let's do it. I don't know the time the time has come
For back loading. All right. We'll just go in order. Just do it. Just just just do whatever start talking
We got a lot of do the fucking coolest thing. I saw yeah all
Packs yeah is this game called phantom brigade. All right
So if I type these names in a google right now
Will I be able to look at a photo of any of these you will be able to see video?
Okay, as I pull it up for you. So I'll be real. I can barely see that shit. Okay. Well
Um, I'm pulling this up so that everyone okay now. I can see that right, but so there's a game called phantom brigade
and what this is is uh, this is from the folks who
masterminded such things as
Crypt of the necro dancer
Really and you're like crypt of the necro dancer. That's a cool fun rhythm based
Like dungeon crawling game. Yeah, what's friend phantom brigade and phantom brigade is a bunch of robots and mecca
Fighting in cities doing what looks like rts things. This looks like the beginning of gundam
And they're very very looking at you. We're literally looking at robots defeating tanks in like a suburb in a suburb exactly
and uh
They are doing you're seeing bits when you see gameplay
You're seeing bits and pieces of you're like, am I seeing some into the breach? Am I seeing some front mission?
Am I seeing some armored core? So what what are we looking at? Right?
Okay, tell me what it is now the reason why this game is so
Fucking sick is because it's cinematic turn based mech mechanic tactics. Okay. Is that if is this my front mission?
This is something else. Okay, you're getting your front mission. Okay, and you're getting you're into the breach
Okay, you're getting your armored core parts and all that shit. Yeah, that's also front mission. Yeah, that's fine
You're getting your robots doing what they need to put on arm on my robot. Okay
Here's how you fucking play. How do you play it?
Uh, so one rotate free camera or whatever to go wishlist this right steam right now
the enemies
Have a path of what they're going to be doing. So that is very into the breach. Yeah, okay
And they and from beginning to the end of the mission. This is what the enemies want to do
Okay, uh, depending on what you do at certain points, obviously they might have to change their minds because they have AI
But you get you get like, uh, let me let me try and get this in my head
Like you you got a tank and the tanks are going to be like they want to blow up the school
They're rolling through this area and they're on this this path. Okay, whatever, right?
You get to see
Up to five seconds
into the future
Of where they're going to be and what they're going to do shut up. This is not a
Next turn thing. This is a
Literally the animation for five seconds of the future will play out. Okay
You see the timeline
Converged to the point where it ends at that five seconds
Shut up
You click on your you see that right got it. You got the the information about the enemy. Okay, and what they're going to do
When you click on your unit, you know, what would you expect to happen?
You would expect to have a series of actions where you then click to go walk here and attack that
That's not what happens. Okay. What happened when you click on your unit, uh-huh
You get a fucking adobe premiere
Timeline at the bottom of the screen. Okay
And now i'm really confused and within that five seconds of preview that you are aware of
Yeah, you determine the actions of your robot by
Putting the movement timeline
Uh-huh
On it you create waypoints so that you walk within that five seconds and do all the movement that you need to do
That so basically you see
Hey, this this tank is going to fire at this building so that I can
Set my timeline so that I run in front of the bullet take the hit shield it and then and then dash backwards to another cover point
Okay, that's just your your feet
Are are you on the premiere timeline for the next five seconds say move forward when this tank looks at this building
You and not that it's mainly not about the buildings though
Yeah, I know I just use this as a sample but you can do that and let go in front and then
Block it or whatever and then move into cover here, right? Okay. Great. That's just your feet
Now pick what
Your act your uh, your attack is going to be yeah
Pick when your attack is going to start within this five seconds and when it's going to end
So if you choose to start shooting at the tank before you get right in front of it
You're going to have less accurate shots from way back here. Of course
So you grab that fucking like attack
That that 1.5 seconds of attack you grab that and drag it forward on the timeline
So that you only start shooting when you're point blank
With the tank after taking the shot from it. Uh-huh
So that is now and then and then as you're retreating keep shooting as well
Uh-huh
So that is now your units play
Mm-hmm
And your second unit can
Does the exact same thing or do whatever and you position and literally then you click execute and then and the turn and then time resumes
Yeah, it's not the turn plays
It's that time resumes and then it slows down
And you see the next five seconds. So
I'm feeling actual
I'm I'm fucking cooling elements of like football on this like playmaking
Yes, yes, um and
But more than anything
I feel that the timing of this reveal and it's
spot in the world
Is but how does it work woolly?
The best but how does it work? I don't understand how it works. Does it erase time?
Is it just are you just the best I can explain the king crimson mech simulator?
Is that you you are not or you're not erasing time
You're interrupting it with with not with what you think is perfect information, but it's not perfect information
Yeah, because what happens is sometimes if like you shoot at a part and the treads of that tank go down
Then that thing's not moving anymore which will alter the or if it hits into your robot's leg
Then you you're fucking limping and you can't move as fast as you would so the play you made when you drew your
Now kind of break you drew your madden line to say make a route up straight and then hook a left over here
Is not going to work because uh-oh midway through this play you start limping
So you can you can make it halfway to that spawn now what right?
So time like the interactions changes things so a man gecko shrink and this is not
I mean
It is in the sense that I can see Naruto's punches robot. I can see where the punches are gonna go
Yeah, where they're supposed to go. Yeah, and I can try to do something about it. Then the instant you uh, touch it
It's it's not what it was. Oh, well, there's a there's a quote by I think it's by dale die
It's like no plan ever survives contact with the enemy
It yeah, sure sure right. It's like oh man. I did it perfect and then the instant like one errant
Variable goes like the whole thing falls apart like a house of cards
So I'm reminded a lot of transistor and I love that's one of my favorite games of all time for that
For that purpose as well besides other things
But transistor lets you see the line of action and then you do the thing
This is just this is more than just a line of action and then like like insert the attack line here and whatnot
You're looking at again the fucking
Adobe premiere play bar like you're looking at the non-linear editor. All right, you know
And then you're moving the the the things into place and you the level of mastery over
How and when you do your actions and then how they play out means that you can just run and gun to finish the mission
But you can also create a super cinematic stylish mecha battle that looks like a fucking episode of something
Oh, yeah, and that's actually literally what the dude said. He's like, yeah, that's my goal
Because at the end of the mission if you're playing it perfectly
It looks like a Gundam at the end of the mission you play out the real-time battle
Of course you do and then hopefully there the real-time battle is what three minutes and 20 seconds
Whatever the whatever the duration and hopefully you you you get your camera
Dramatic camera cuts to like fucking all right. Look at shit. This is seems pretty great
This is a robot game about robot stuff. This seems like a fucking nerd game for dorks
Which sounds awesome. So now let's talk mass appeal. Okay, which character is your little sister?
And how big are her tits? Well, you seem to be under the impression that this game is Japanese
When it is in fact, I'm saying it appeals to people who play Japanese games. Okay. Well
There was someone who trips and falls on a skateboard and that kid gets saved by the robot
So maybe that's your emoto. Okay the skateboard skateboard. Yeah
Anyway, little sister can't possibly be this skateboard
Be this constipated you see that's anyway. No, you mean the hemorrhoid
Whatever. Yeah, um, so no not whatever learn it
Phantom Brigade was the fucking sickest and I was
Insanely excited as soon as I because I walk by and I see robots in a in a hangar bay and it's going through a bunch of parts
So I'm like, all right
You woolly baited me into stopping and looking at the video right because I'm seeing all these parts
Yeah, and then the action starts and then I see what's happening and I'm like
I still don't and then I sit down and I get the spiel and I'm like, oh
Fuck this is your mecca. Did they like see you walking by or hey woolly?
I think they saw walking by and they started creating the game
Oh, yeah, and then as soon as by the time I approached it like the dev the dev bar went
Hey, when is this coming out?
So this is coming out a while. Okay. That's that's what I thought. Um, this is
earliest possibility
2020 okay, so later. So this is not this year. Okay for sure. Okay
Very cool spend the time on that that looks dope guys. Yes phantom brigade
Second thing that fucking blew me the fuck away. That's a strong start
Uh, very very very very cool
Second thing that got me joneson
Hard was I walked by a game called sayonara wild hearts. Uh-huh and this too is
Uh, you can you woolly baiting is becoming a clear and an obvious term these days make sure to bait the woolly
So I don't mind using it when appropriate, but
Sayonara wild hearts from anapurna
Coming to switch and coming to I guess I saw a video about this is
a fucking
crazy ass trippy
like
Res like journey at times other times you're racing
A lot of the time you're just flying through a sick ass world of
flashy neon
Colors and characters are simultaneously
Fighting and doing ballet with each other and spinning motorcycles motorcycle gang battles
And the motorcycle gang battles with henshins and transformations and the arcana. You know what this is powers
You know what this really is this is a combination of those motorcycle shots from akira
and the uh figure skating sliding down the highway bits
From the persona five introduction video the persona five intro is playable is a nice place to start
Yeah, imagine while you're doing all of that
That exceptionally rad shit keeps happening around you and the world keep changing and the enemies keep changing and things are just going
Also, the music is great
And everything happening in the stage is directly tied to the music great. So it's completely rhythmic as well. That's good
God damn that looks nice. This thing is fucking cool
And descriptions are not going to sell you because you have to go we have to see it. It's a visual treat
Uh, that's cyan arrow wild hearts
Just visually incredible. Um looks cool
So
third thing
That fucking got me and this one for completely different purposes, but
I was just I was I was really enjoying my time
What the fuck with trover saves the universe trover sound looks like a lemongrab style freakazoid
This is from squash games formerly known as squash tendo
Wait a sec created by justin roland. You know it. There's a reason it looks like a fucking lemongrab style freakazoid
So squash games aka formally that other thing. Yeah, whatever
Uh
Is doing a bunch of weird stuff and they decided to make the their first one of their first games is trover saves the universe
And it's a vr, but it's also not vr. Oh good. And it's justin roland. So it's the rick and morty
Uh, fucking crew doing their thing and the voices are all there
Justin roland might have the ability to make the like the most annoying character voice literally ever and he has been using it
well
uh
This game is just
It's it's a game that is basic. What is it?
It's a really it's a funny vr. Game experience
But it's basically like imagine if like rick is describing a game to you
Like through those comer, you know the commercials. Yeah, imagine if you're playing one of those
Okay, you're playing a game that plays like one of those commercials
Where we're just you just you don't know what's going on and they're just the same thing to as they're saying the things
They just start happening and then as they're happening like you're like, I guess I guess we're doing it then
I guess it's just going so it's like a stream of consciousness, but it's a game and it's fucking exactly
That's exactly it's it's like you I think if you told me now that they improvised for like a few hours
And then that audio file got set to a team who decided to create assets around it. Yeah, that's kind of what this was
um
Like the fucking for like the first thing that literally happens is you're stirring at your little puppies your little dogs
And they all look like the summer. Where are my testicles? Yeah, they look like
Oh, yeah, mr. Snuffles or whatever and and then the dog and they're doing their thing and then like literally like
Then just this big weird bird thing grabs them that has no eyes
And then he shoves them in his eye sockets and it's just like ah
Ah, I'm so fucking evil. Ah, I got your puppies in my eyes. You stupid fucking you stupid
Power and it just
Like what is what are we doing?
Fuck you fuck you and then goes away and then you're like and then you're in your house and then it just
It literally just you're just they're just spouting off bullshit and trying to write a game around the bullshit
They're spouting. It's hilarious. I I laughed super hard and the game is like who cares what the fucking game is
Yeah, really? It's what you're like you're running around in a VR world in your master's
But who gives a shit? Yeah, it's stupid basic VR controls. It doesn't matter. It's fucking funny
um
I'm looking forward greatly to trover saves the universe that shit fucking
I was howling for a while. I love that. I could tell I was able to tell just by like the shape of this thing
Screaming mouth. Yeah, and it was just in New Orleans. Oh and the weird like butt mouth thing that happens where they go
Like the weird uh
Three face, but it's not the cat version
It's just I gotta catch up on working more to keep my IQ strong. Yeah
There you go. There's there's three w there's a bunch of w faced
Characters that make that that reaction. So uh fun
fun was had
We got into
The rest of the shit after that and there's some there's some some fucking
We got some bangers. I spent an entire day
Uh
With samurai showdown. Yes
So I saw shit coming out of from samurai showdown this weekend best described as don't get got
The game yep sure and when we sat down I said woolly
Samurai showdown looks like a fucking super nintendo game from 1994. Yep, and you went
That's correct. Yeah
And it doesn't look like it. No because it looks like it it looks like it in the sense that
this
What like the play of this game and the and what's happening and the damage and everything
Like looks like an old school samurai show. I'm like, yeah, this is samurai showdown too
Like okay, so we're done playing enlist walls for the day and let's just switch over to sam show two two
Yeah, is is what this is
um
Don't get counter hit. Yeah
Obviously right like just that's the first thing that comes to mind is just how
Devastating the damage is which it has always been. Yeah, right, but this has
Like the added uh modern things such as like comeback mechanics. Yeah that get worked in and like uh other bits that just
Melt your life depending on what you tried to do and how you failed at it
So the thing that that that caused this game to like shift in its perception
Among the general populace that those that saw it
Was uh when somebody got a hold of it and discovered that the game has like no throw teching of any kind
Don't get thrown
um, and there's a I mean there's a lot of command grabs, but uh
Is there no laser?
That's what I saw. It's the you can't tech throws period
I'm not sure about that. Oh now i'm disappointed if that's not true. I'm not sure about that one
I want to live in a world where no one can tech my throws regular throws in this game. However are all
Uh caracusas, so okay, they're a throw in this game is not like get grabbed in damage
The throw is I grab you and I shove you back. It's called a guard break
Okay, because you just stumble a little bit and you get opened up for
Something right people are saying that throws can't be teched. Okay. Well, um
That possibly if you can if you I guess you throw dodges out then to avoid yeah, that's people are saying you dodge throws
You don't attack them. Okay. Well, uh, what we're doing is oh man jube is back. I like jube
What we're doing is yeah jube is really cool
You're looking at so yeah, you're looking at something that feels a lot like semi-shot on two. Uh, you're looking at
Pretty like like it looks good. It looks good. It looks a lot better than king of fighters 14
Hell yeah, it does um and this looks like a real video game for humans and at the panel
The question was asked like why is that you know and they kind of went yeah more time in the oven
So maybe kof 15 will look like this
So
I don't want to I can't say shit about kof 15. I don't know what the fuck that's gonna be but
I just say uh everything I expect and hope for with samurai showdown for me
Which is a lot of it is like I hope it's a lot like four because that's the one I know
But a lot of people are like I like too and some people are like everyone's my special
Uh, it's there. It's got that vibe to it. Um, the timing feels right. There's slowdown at certain moments
That is like, oh, that's exactly where the slowdown is supposed to be at the top of well earthquake looks nuts
At the top of genjuro's dp the game should slow down. Yeah, you know
um
There is uh
Yeah, a lot of like wild things that I kind of like like the the lightning blade right is the is the big one where that's that's the
Mechanic of your pow builds up as you get hit as you do damage and whatnot. Yeah
And then you activate it for your rage burst
Uh, what happens then is certain moves get better
Mm-hmm, and you can tap it again to do a lightning blade
Which is where the screen goes red and you slash across the screen and if they're doing anything
If you counter hit with that you are losing
It depends on what you when it was used but at at lowest
Scaled you're losing maybe
15 to 20 percent. Okay, uh at highest unscaled. I got a pure raw hit 80 nice 80
Um, this is a system
That works well for pat and his wake up super lifestyle
So you better be making the right decisions. This is not about combos
I'm watching gameplay footage. This is
Boy, this is this is a proper throwback. This is a you try to get the right swing in at the right time
You try to footsie. This is zoning and counter hits you footsie and then you react
You do not try to do anything that like goes on and on and on because
Hits are very very brief and basic
Cancels are like one hit one button into one move, you know
Um, so it's funny because this is very like as far as fighting games go
This is probably about as accessible as it'll be outside of like smash in terms of like
Yeah, I'm not seeing combos. No, this is decision-making, but it's also like
Extra crazy vicious. Yeah, and you're gonna get rocked if you if you fucking make bad decisions. Yeah, you know
um
So it feels like the more you you you tone down a games like mechanical complexity the meaner you make it
Can be um, there's still like inputs that are snk inputs in these games
So you gotta have them. Yeah. In fact, there's a universal super that everyone has and there's no bar attached to it
It's all is simply you get one percent. Okay, and it is uh, or per match, I should say
Um, and it is like forward half circle forward b and c or rather, uh c and d. Yeah, okay. That's a good old guilty gear
That and then and then everyone gets us a big super off of that
You can do it anytime no matter what you get one and you get one does a lot of damage
And it's those are those are the yellow background supers you get one
But the startup is so incredibly slow that you will never confirm it in any way
So it is
Used on styling and mistakes. Okay. Um
The lightning like super for life the lightning blade I described you can confirm by doing the throw
I previously described. Yeah, where you toss them back and then it scales it then it scales it
Now you want to hit that raw. Well, I mean it depends if you react to what you see, you know, don't get baited
So my I have some footage that says it's always better to hit it raw
I recorded some footage with the developers playing some matches against me. I had some good times
We talked about uh some s and k stuff and like they're like, oh, what characters would you want to see?
Kind of coming back and I was like, uh, how about how about that fucking
Afro samurai, I think jay from samurai showdown sen. How about that and they're like, oh
Yeah, sen
Right. Yeah, and I was like, how about president andrew jackson
From five and five special or you know that came later or rather six rather
Yeah, you know, who does the fucking eagle round and then turns it into a burning eagle like
I don't like yeah, uh-huh
Uh, but but in any case right now. So they they've announced
13 returning characters and three new ones the first of which was revealed live in front of me. Looks cool
Straight to me. Yes to you straight to me. That's your monster hunter character. They they reveal. I'm not even joking
That is straight up your monster hunter darling dagger the purple dreadheaded giant
Chainsaws blade wielding jacked female look alike
What a fucking beast of a pick
So the woolly bait continues
Uh, darling dagger looks great. We've had a good run the past like week or two good runs good week for woolly bait
Good week now that means something bad's gonna happen probably
So, um, don't jinx it
The uh, yeah, so that that's that I'm gonna do um, I'm gonna put the footage up
I'm gonna do some more in-depth impressions later
This looks I'm looking at footage here on the screen. Well, he's got it. This looks so old school. I almost can't believe it
Yeah, yeah, yeah, this looks like a super nintendo game
They really want it to feel and look like oh they wanted to look like wood like woodblock prints
Like but they want the the pacing of the game to be
Deliberately old like the one that gets me is that like how maru does his lecture you can and he carries
Earthquake up in the air and then how maru keeps going
And he keeps going
It like it hits and they're in the air and then he slowly falls back down and then earthquakes kind of on the ground
Yeah, and then he recent and like the whole thing is like a single hit
That's like five seconds dude the fucking sound clips of the referee
Might as well be the ones from samurai showdown 2 on this mess. It's like they sound identical
If not for like the lack of tinniness. What do you go as fucking?
He's a jinchoni show. Like it's it's exactly the same, you know
um, so that's all there
And uh, look forward to it. I will be like doing a more in-depth video with footage of the my matches where some fun stuff happened
Uh a bit later on woolly versus and I'll go more into depth with now that you've had hands on with this game
Are you excited to see it at evo? Yeah?
Yeah, and I'm I'm the concerns of it possibly being a bad
Uh a game that we just don't know anything about are not there anymore because I've confirmed that it's a good fun game
I'm actually this this everything to do with the counter system and the way that throws work makes me actually really really excited to watch this
Yeah, like a a game in which you can get an 80 percent like
Round reset off of a counter hit is like wild the truth of the matter is that samurai showdown has always been good
It's just been dead for a long time. It's been deader for longer than it was alive. So
Yeah, like one two three
Like four all came out like relatively close to each other
And then you just had that fucking gap and then send and then you had 64
and shout outs to the other 3d one warriors rage because
Hey, shiki's back
Right, we didn't get much but we got shiki out of it. So
She stuck around they realized they had gold on her hands. All right. Anyway, samurai showdown is great. Um
Stopped by the uh like with a with a keen peeled eye
I fucking kept a lookout for other fighting games and I saw metal revolution the game
I took a look at on my channel, which is uh the rising thunder similar kind of robot fighter
and um robot
These but these are the ones wearing clothes
Right and you know, I didn't actually get a look at it when you played it
Wow, they look way better when they're wearing clothes. You like robots wearing clothes. Yeah, I think it's a really classy look
I mean, I'll tell you one thing. I think it's splitting the difference between how you know how we heard people saying
Yeah, rising thunder looks fun, but I don't care about the the characters because the robots are
Like not my thing or whatever and I got really sad at that because they're like, oh people just care more about humans than
Yes, people
Care more about humans. No, but I I I miss I
Like of course people care more about humans, but I really didn't realized
How
Much people didn't care about robots the robot types in in in rising thunder were a little
Was a round
Like that that kind of looked like that kind of giant look they look like toys
Like people tend to like angles more. So yeah, I got to play this the new build lots of changes with like
um
What how they're going about things and what the character is some tweaks and balances and whatnot
It's you know, there's some stuff that's quite different. I kind of got some matches in with dev there as well and
Um, yeah, I mean there's some stuff that's interesting that I like I like what's going on
The definitely one thing that was better was like the level of input delay and the feeling of like underwater lagginess was
better this time around because of
Not being online and this being a local environment
Yeah, like probably play at the build as intended and with that I was like so this is going to be offline local
And they're like yes, it's going to have offline local. So like they're the number one worry
Yeah, this would be an online only thing
But thankfully, uh, they've confirmed that it will have like normal and being said that code will obviously improve over time
One would one would assume and hope and whatnot because like I like wools like it's this thing
I hate to be a bad horse, but like yes, of course, of course
every fighting game needs offline local
But but 99% of people are never going to play a fighting game offline local anymore
I
Right a large number. Maybe not 99, but yes a large a large proportion
And we can argue over what that proportion is but the majority it matters way more than what the net code's doing
I know I know and it's a weird situation because you're right. Of course, you're right
But like because like you saying that it's like oh, thank goodness. It's not that online made me go. Oh
Should I well because the first build I had didn't like it had it in there and whatnot
But like it was like you had to sign in and it was very like kept behind
Are you online and signed in thing where I'm like I kind of just want to start and play but anyway, um
The gameplay is still very very basic in terms of like, you know, like normals and buttons and whatnot
But um, yeah, I had some fun matches and there's some some interesting things there
So I I could help to you know, it's like it's still in the it's still in the oven
Potentials there designs are cool. I think robots wearing pants is a cool future. We should embrace sure. I'm all about it
um
Miyamoto Ren is like the robot with the fucking tilted
Triad looking outfit. He's got like a little suit on and
I'm like, oh, I'm all about it. I'm like, yeah
Like make your guy look like a cool stylish triad robot with fashion
You know
Why not?
um anyway, so
I think warframe should add pants
I you put to human clothes on all that shit. Hell, yeah
anyway, so um, um
There that thing's coming along and uh, still a ways to go. You know still still got
Uh, like I said, some you know, I think I think like I would prefer if like the auto combo system wasn't kind of like
One of the only ways to really get in there and do damage
I like having pokes and I like having options with how I want to go through my combo routes, but um
You know beyond that there's some interesting stuff that we'll see how it shapes up
The options for having games like this and and and uh fantasy strike and just these you know, like sort of
Uh execution light decision-heavy games is like growing wider and wider every day. So
There you go. Uh, I went to play
Uh biomutant. I got oh you got a hammer. My hands on a bio mutant. How's the bio mutant? Uh, it's okay
That's what I thought. It's okay. It's um
You know, it's not as it could never live up to biomutant. Yeah
Yeah, it was you know, like you kind of just ran around and did the beginning thing and like
Like well clearly the whole like evolve and make weird things happen and pop out of you stuff like
It's almost like there. Well, I mean there's another game that came along that had that has that going even more hardcore right now
But uh, what's fun about this is like the the narration is kind of doing a like a little bit of a bastion thing
Not that it's predicting or reacting to your your future decisions as much as it is just like constantly present
And so okay having fun with you as you go through it
So
Narration from the moment you press start going forward is you know in an interesting about the bio mutant
Yeah, and whatnot and you choose what kind of weird creature you want to be and how you can how you
What kind of fur level you want to grow you want to go deep fur? Yeah, or the the loose fur, you know
How you want to how you want to rep that?
Um, what oh, I didn't know you could alter your biomutant
Uh, you know, and then you yeah, you pick up your your gun and your melee and you like I picked up some charge
Fucking punch things that like you charge them for a couple seconds
And then you do like a like a short little bionic arm type thing
Um, and things go flying and I was like I like that I'll use that for a bit
But yeah, it was it was exactly what it looks like combat kind of was just like, okay sure, you know, this is fine
um
There was a big boss fight as well that was just
Just a big monster and you just wailed on it for a while and it would just kind of run in lines
And you know, I'm like, okay, you know, so anyway, um, I I I didn't say anything that blew me the fuck away about it
Uh, but the premise and the initial art were all what most people most I think I think it's like it's kind of trapped
Because like you're looking at the steam page and in the upper right of corner of the steam page is
The word biomutant with like a raccoon freakazoid with a sword raccoon guts and like
Damn
Right like it's tough to live up to just that
photo of a pitch
now
Yeah, it just it kind of plays a little a little german right might be
Please then you say biomutant with like a weird german accent biomutant. Yeah, like aw man
But uh, what I what I saw was um gameplay wise was a little more generic than I was helping. Yeah, I saw footage for a while ago
And it was like
Do you need a beverage? I need many beverages
You want me to get one? You want to? No, I'll get one. Okay. You go go get one. All right. Do your thing
so, um, the next thing I took a look at was man of meeting
Or man of mid-an. I don't know how to say it. I don't know how to say it
Man of mid-an. I'm gonna try I'm gonna I'm gonna follow your lead. I don't know
uh
Man of mid-an is the super massive game
From the dark trilogy if you might recall when they announced what they were doing after until dawn
It was about those kids on the boat
Remember to think with the kids on the boat
The kids on the boat. Yeah
Oh god, the kids on the boat. Yeah, so Adam's there. So I get to the back of the boat. So the whole thing was basically that's all I got
So the so yeah, it was just that was like a quick slice of like a scary part
Where you're playing as that main girl with the red shirt and
You're walking around in a haunted boat and there's some other fucker who's trying to hold you hostage
And scary scary. You ever see ghost ship? No, that movie sucks probably but
It's about a ghost ship probably
So for what it's worth
The actual oh, it's actually playing. Yeah. Yeah. So the actual trailer and uh and whatnot like
So what what I could tell from this, uh, I'm very excited because I fucking loved until dawn until dawn was a fucking triumph of that type of game
Yeah, so what this seems to be is just exactly more of that with different assets, but with the ghost ship different assets
But then it's not ghosts
There's zombos, but then it's not zombos. I hope so right because what happened in the best part of the bit
So the the end of the trailer is like all the stuff that I played
Right here and it appears to just be weird water zombos. Yeah, but like that's it
But it's not zombos actually it's ghosts. Yeah
So something so the twist the twist can save that but the the the premise right off the bat is kind of just like, okay
Well, um, it was all uh, uh, it was all uh
Okay, yeah, that's a ghost. I saw a ghost the ghost trailer. That was a ghost
Uh, what is funny to watch is like like so it's got the really you remember, you know
The you know how like everyone in until dawn has the until dawn face where they go like yeah
The test face
Yeah, you know and so like that's happening a whole bunch and uh and and I think it was just like kind of early
So the the lip syncs were a bit off
Um for now, but for the most part we are getting more until dawn with other kids
Trying to survive being killed by other things. I'm glad
It is that's a genre we need more of in video games
Yeah, it is delivering on the promise of what they brought you last time
Oh, no don't murder me and then the scraping against the walls instead of going to where the light tells you to
Might net you something nice like a fucking knife
You know like like a bat from until dawn what if having the bat is bad?
Well in this case having the knife would good. Oh, yeah, but what if though so
Uh one of the speak and then like something that fucking
Has me forever is
Space channel five. So when I heard that the vr experience was I saw I was yeah, many people saw because I got
Fucking got that's weird
Seconds after I find that really bizarre
Seconds after it happened
I played
The space channel five vr game and someone caught in footage of me dancing and doing the moves
And it went and it went on twitter and I was like
Like that makes me never want to fucking put on a vr headset in a public environmental environment. Don't do it
Don't don't do it because like what if what if I took off the vr headset and instead of a camera?
Someone just had their penis out
Yeah, you can't you can't you don't know you can't control what's happening in the world around you when that headsets on
Yeah, and the audio that would like be like the the jingling of the pants and the zipper that would clue you off
Yeah, you can't hear that. No, I have air pods in I can't hear it behind me
In any case I retweeted it because what else what else? What are you gonna pretend that didn't happen?
Uh
Ulala is back and her swinging report show is doing what it does and the only difference this time around is that you're standing next to her
And you have to move your body in all the directions to emulate the poses to do the up down left right shoot
Shoot shoot shoot space channel five is awesome because it's a really short game that was a terrible value
But it's so fucking zany and cool that everybody loves it and the music is great and it's a fun time
So we all love it. Um
I will never never never not think about
That
That walk is like i'm watching lula do her her strut her strut that is that is space channel five to me
And the the acapella the acapella final boss fight is one of the best most fun things
I love it so much because you stop all the music but the music is in our hearts man. Oh damn, dude
But
Yeah, so anyway, uh, guess what moving your body into the positions to do the rhythm moves
Way harder than doing it with a fucking button. Yeah way harder. Wow and uh, the camera
The cameras were in place
You either weren't in the right place or they didn't like something they were seeing
But some we're not seeing or but some of my gestures were not reading
And I was having technical trouble
That's the biggest problem I have with the vr stuff, which is not the vr stuff. It's actually the motion stuff
Yeah, I was never
Once when I got playstation vr back in my old apartment
I haven't tried it in the new place and honestly
I don't know where my playstation vr is or even if it's fit to use because the thing has been sitting in the bottom
Of a box for like two years or whatever, right?
I was never able to get it synced up to like my location properly once
like
Are you well? Here's the other thing too. We have similar setups where
You're they expect your camera to be way closer to you than where your tv is to you. Yeah, so
um
I don't know if you've tried it, but if you ever pull it back out
Put a chair in between the two of you or a little stool and I have a coffee table now that like can't move
It's too big put the camera on that instead and try it out
If I got if I got a vr setup at this point
I have my own basement that I can install shit into I would just get a five or whatever the
You know like just install that shit
So the fortunate part is that both the vivan oculus which are a rolling out. They're free
not free they're um
non
They're they're self-contained units. Yeah, right. So there's that anyway where it doesn't matter if it's where you're by the tv or not
but
The psvr still has the old requirements and the new ones don't have that so
That's something that I also
Valve is making their own vr thing. There you go, right?
So it's probably gonna come integrated with source filmmaker for directing purposes. Yep. There you go
Uh, so this game is uh great on paper
I'm excited on paper for as long as it works for this
But the fucking please make the gestures work because I was I was having problems
And whatnot, but I still cleared it and it was fine
uh
swung by the mega 64 booth said what's up to the to the boys and girls
and
Rocco as cool as ever
They hang in they hung in there and it was really funny and I was just like
I'm there doing the thing that everyone does with us where it's just kind of like
Hey, hey, hey, how's it how's it how's it going? How's it going? Hey, and you know the the like just that like oh man like
These guys are like i'll never fucking will never be never mega 64
They're just the best have been there forever and like for some reason they just don't have
The amount of views and follows that you expect being prolific and amazing
And yeah, so when people were saying talking about the telltale influence thing today this week based on me telling that story
I'm like they're that times a million because mega 64 has way more influence and way more
Direct connections to really good shit from the industry and people know them inside and they've done so much
and
Yet somehow just don't have
The legions of followers and views that you would expect and it's kind of insane to me that that's the case
Because goddamn mega 64 is the fucking best
And um
Like if there was all and there's almost a bit of like a thing where I was like, okay
So I want to grab like I grab like the sweater and some of their merch because their merch is fucking great
Yes, it is and uh, and you know dude was just kind of like hey, hey, dude. What's that?
You just take it like what's up? How you guys doing? You know like and then you're like, yeah
I'm like, oh my god. He remembers. He remembers. You know, um, but
The funny part of sounds like somebody hasn't acclimated into their influence role yet
The funniest part about that and I and I got the vibe that this probably happened with everyone else is
When december went down and the final video went out and things were all like shitty
Uh, it sounds like one of the things that happened is everyone else that had like a just a video game group
That's right. Just got inundated with a ton of people going like, are you guys okay?
And it's like, yeah, why wouldn't we be? Yeah, why oh god because you know, and it was just a very funny like
Oh, shit like the like the fear just boiled over to other groups so that like
Kind of funny and and I don't know any other like similar to zaibatsu style groups
Had a bunch of like panic about like, oh my god
Are you is is anything happening where you're gonna end it to or something going wrong?
I was like, no, I think it's just best. I think I had I think I had
What might actually be a more bizarre experience than that. I was running errands the other day
And uh in a part of town I don't usually go to and then I ran into a guy
I have not seen in five years that I used to work with at the grocery store
He goes, oh, hey, man. You doing all right
I went why? Well, I heard about the channel
huh, and I went
The channel that I never spoke to you once about because it was a fledgling side project and then I never saw you as like
Yeah, yeah, oh cool. Yeah, you're streaming. Oh, that's good. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Bye
That was weird. Yeah
I think a bunch of that was really weird
A bunch of people we know in real life that like are that we've known before any of this stuff are definitely like
Tangentially aware enough to date on certain things not that they'd ever let you know it
But there's definitely that to some degree and it's always like oh shit. Hey cool. That's flattering. That's fun to know that, you know
Um, but what yeah that that whole thing was just really funny because it's like there's no cause for it
There's no logic behind it
But there's just a fear that like
Other groups might all like giant is giant bomb ending and it's like no nothing happened. It's okay
No, giant bomb ended years ago when Ryan passed away. Well, that is I'm sorry for getting too real just now
I kind of got very sad in my heart. Wow
I am off the fucking rails trying to figure out how to get back on
Okay
Did you really have to bust out a level four super just in the middle of the fucking conversation
That is the oof of the century
Yeah, it is
I still think Vinny shouldn't have moved out east, but I mean he's gotta do he's gotta do
Fuck
Okay, well, anyway
um
Cyber shadow
Is the game that yacht club is now pushing as the new thing they're gonna be publishing
And uh, it was really cool because their their booth is pretty busy with everyone checking out shovel knight showdown and um
Like this looks like ninja garden. Yeah, and I was able to play on the personal switch
over there, uh
of
Just switched now, huh?
Of the yeah, well, uh, I don't know if it's just switch
But uh, but anyway the personal yacht cup slot. Yeah, blah yacht club switch was there and the creator of cyber shadow was there
And like I remember there's an article that just came out today
It was almost like this crossover didn't happen or almost didn't happen
But then they went like we wooed him in and we
whispered sweet nothings and
Like little sugars in his in his in his it was honey syrups in his ear or whatever
There's a saying for how you pour fucking you do you pour you drip honey in this drip
You drip honey deer honey dick. They honey dick them. They honey dick
They honey dick cyber shadow. They dicked their honey. They honey dick the cyber shadow and they smeared the
You know what I actually you know what whenever I think about putting on a vr headset
That's what I'm actually worried about getting honey dick
I'm worried that right before the show started the employee that was working at it
Thought it would be funny and just smeared their balls and dick all over every part of the screen and and thing
And that's how you get pink eye
Cyber shadow that's what I'm worried about cyber shadow, uh, was basically uh
Or is a game that upon first glance you're like that reminds me of the messenger because it's a classic
Ninja guidance style ninja nest looking thing and then you play it. You're like no, they're not the same
Uh cyber shadow is a very cool
Uh progress a little strydery. Yes like for the nest. Yes
Progress and get your power-ups and it just you know what in in the shovel night way
It's mechanically simple
But it just feels good. It looks great, so and a lot of what you're doing is just like precision
based platforming precision based attacking
And reacting to enemy patterns
That are like tricky sometimes and taking you fucking by surprise
And they're great
Also the main characters of robot ninja and that's cool
Yes, I like robot the sprites, uh the backgrounds in particular
Are gorgeous. Is Sekiro a cyborg?
No, he's a man with a prosthetic arm. Yeah, okay
Because it's not machinery. It's it's it's not technology. It's machinery
Yeah
The gears and wines and I mean it's mechanical
But yes, um, yeah, anyway, so the the cyber shadow was uh is looking really really tight
Really really clean and it looks just in the same way. Like I said, like it's a very
similar to shovel night like, um
beautiful classic capturing of an era
Painfully accurate to that era. There's there's a there's a bit. Uh, there's a really good video on game maker's toolkit
Uh by mark brown about how about shovel night refusing to cheat how how how shovel night
Refuses to cheat but then also cheats. Yes, because it is
It is attempting to evoke the feeling. Yes, it's about the feeling of the classics
And it's like you can't put these many fucking horizontal sprites without the game breaking
Fuck you shovel night. You lie, right? And then it's like but you don't remember that bullshit
But we can get that intentional slowdown
Just to make it feel like oh, there's too much going on right here. You're like, yes. Yes. They're masters at that
um, so yeah, man, uh, I was I had a lot of fun with that brief demo
um
And there was no real power-ups either in it. It was very simple. Yeah, it was just it was just the basic controls
But like am I cool?
There's room for that and for messenger, which also has some dlc free deals feel free lc coming out
Uh messenger picnic panic was there that is not what I that is the last thing that I exactly exactly messenger picnic panic free lc coming out
Uh involving like boss fights of by a fighter ginox free loadable content. There you go
um
So the keita takahashi jane was in there, uh, watam, which we saw
Uh teased on stage. I remember hearing that this is kind of like noby noby boy
It's very much like noby noby boy
Uh in that it's not a game
As much as it is a toy. So it's a bunch of weird bullshit bunch of weird characters
They're running around an area you can take control of any of them at any time
They all have unique actions and they all interact with each other in particular ways
And most of them just lay out little shits. All right. They can all make make little poops
Yeah, it does sound a lot like noby noby boy
You can then control the characters that get pooped out and the little poops become their their own characters
And then you can stack the poops on top of each other
Or not or eat them you can eat the poops as well
You eat the poo and then you just kind of play and you interact and stack together and then
As you do and your interactions and your stacking is bigger and more weird worlds and characters show up
And they ask you to do different things and then eat the poo poo eat the poo poo
The what time eat the poo poo what time eat eat the poo
Keita Takahashi says eat the poo poo
It's a toy
It was fun
It's you know children will love it every time I hear that I try not to lose it
Speaking of losing it my friend Pedro
Not my actual friend Pedro, but the name of the game is my friend Pedro
Which you might remember because it was that devolver game with the slow motion bullet festival
Um, yes and bananas. Yes. So basically you're a crazy person and uh, you uh, uh, I mean you are but
You're a crazy person and a banana is talking to you. It says kill and it says to yeah, exactly
It's the it's the it's the the the what you call it the leprechaun on, um
Ralph's shoulder on Ralph's shoulder. There you go. Um, this game is really really crazy with the slow motion bullet
Psycho-Felstival action and the twisting and the dodging and whatnot is really fun to do slow motion as well is very generous
So it makes it feel really cool
The thing about it is when you're in the middle of all these stylish moments like the trailer shows you
Yeah, your brain has so much gymnastics to go through because
Uh, they introduced one button that made the whole thing fucking go haywire, which is hold
uh, I want to say rt
to rrb
To lock where you're shooting in with your first gun. Yeah, and then free stick aim with your second
And just that all right, this is just that alone made my brain go
Okay
Like if I could shoot like because dodging and shooting and rolling and kicking and doing all that in one line of shot direction
Is fine, but
Reconfiguring where the twosome time is happening. Yeah moment to moment is a lot
And all that stylish shit you're seeing is not as easy as it actually looks I see so um
Yeah, this is a game that I think is gonna fucking
It's gonna make you feel really stylish and it does a it's a devolver fucking thing. You're like there's a reason why you know, but um
It's it's gunslinger the platformer. Yeah, I'm seeing that so there you go. I'm seeing that
uh
So that was coming out
In a couple months time actually I want to say it's coming out this summer. Yeah, june. There you go. That's nice
Okay, let's move along. Um after party is a game where you are literally it's just like almost like a
Seems to be just like a like a fucking
Point-and-click. Yeah, you know type of game classic style. You are a bunch of
Kids. Yeah hipstery. Yeah, and you're walking around hipster hell. Oh, I I recognize this art style
This is oxen free
Okay, yeah, this is probably by the people did oxen free. It's not exactly hipsters. It's more just kind of like like not everything's hipster now
No, no, no, it's millennial. It's millennial party. You heard me. It's not not everything is hipster. You're right
Whatever, but I put it out there just so that you get the right area of of category
And then I'll pair it down and say not actually hipster just like millennial party themed
You know and it's millennial party themed hell and everyone is as you can see there on that does seem like hell
Yeah, and you're but you're walking around actual hell where everyone's got an instagram account
Okay, and uh, this makes me want to die and you you walk around and talk and you basically you play beer pong with demons
Okay, uh, the dialogue is witty. I'm vomiting the dialogue is witty
Is it millennial witty and the whole deal is to if you want to get out of hell
Uh, you got an out party satan. Oh, okay
That's it. I'm throwing up. It's called after party. Cool
I
Are you millennials?
Us yeah, yes
You're in there
Are you one of those people clicking on those articles about how dumb millennials are and feeling good about yourself?
No, because you're one of them. I just feel out of touch and very old all the time
You should you you feel the way you look. I oh
Oh
It's not a burn if it's just true, uh, I remember that that that justification later
Oh boy, all right, so indivisible
um
Latest backer demo went up and they had that there
And I come out already. I want to play. I know it's like dude. It's so good. It's so good like I know
There's like there's very little to say except it's like
Played more indivisible. There was more characters in this world. That was may that may or may not be in that final or whatever
and
Uh, you could go into the inner azna's inner palace. Yeah her mental
I have I have stayed away from almost everything about this game
Um, it's fucking fun, man. The old you know what the battle system is so much fun
You know what the number one thing that I know about this game is
Is magma going to trade shows and doing infinites on new enemy types. Sure. Sure
um getting used to how to juggle and and get your combos going and using what when
You know and like timing your parry your blocks and parries perfectly
is just like
Yeah, it's you know what it is
You know how the thing that you used to hate about marvel was like how to use assists
Yeah, this is assists the game
And this forces you to get good at assists
So if you have any love in you
for
Like hyper fighters like marvel and whatnot and the combo juggling potential of assists. I thought this was an rpg
Yeah, and it's all and also valkyrie profile and stuff then yes use that when you talk to me
Yes, valkyrie profile and also tales of games and juggling combo systems. Yeah, all right
Those are in there too. This is working better. Those are in there too. Those are great. That's great. It's really fun
but
From the fighting game people
That brought you skull girls me again
Comes the fighting game aspects
In which it's really fun to call in your your assists and have them juggling play together
So and you're using meter and bar and choosing one to use it and some of them in and in a lot of cases you're just installing
So indivisibles shaping up real nice. Can you do a 28 hit combo? Like
easily
easily
28 is nothing. Is there a death blow system like in xeno gear? I don't know about that. Okay. Um, I know you don't
I don't know if you can do a nibble lung velocity, but
You know indivisible shaping up real nice
Uh, the check-in is I didn't I could the wait for for bloodstained was too long and it was the same line for both
And it's like pick one and I'm like, well, I mean, yeah, I I already did. Yeah
Uh, so also even then like bloodstain is like you touch it. You're like, yeah, this is what it's supposed to be
Okay, right like cute soul. Sorry. Cutest dungeon. Okay
Mist over is the name of the game. All right
Heavily inspired by darkest dungeon if you can't tell okay, I can't because I've seen nothing so far. Okay. Well, it's called mist over
and
a bunch of
Explore that mist a bunch of cute anime type characters
Yeah, in uh she be proportion. That's correct, but they're lit like darkest dungeon characters. Yeah
Go through uh a map. It's kind of edgy and odyssey-ish, but that is edgy and odyssey-ish exactly
It's not it's not just a straight line like darkest dungeon
Yeah, but um and battles are also not just a straight line. They're like on a like on a grid on a grid
Yeah, but there's darkest dungeon interactions happening constantly and states and hunger things happen to your cute anime
Exactly, and it's very easy to die. No, not my cute anime and you got to find your way out of the dungeon and uh
You know whatever and it's and it's cute, but it's a dungeon
Oh, man
Make your way out and this game was when you beat it or survive or whatever you take a screenshot over to
The desk and show them and then you get the rewards and people were lined up at this all day
One of them anime dolls people were lined up at this shit all fucking day to try and get that much
I'll need my anime doll, but there you go. That's what that would be. Um
Yeah, cutest dungeon if you thought darkest dungeon was cool, but you wanted it a little bit more adorbs
And you wanted your paladin to be like a twin tail
Um that monster that's there. You know, it's yeah shindal did his work. It's true
But you know what I mean? I'm saying you can you can also do it in this other thing and that's what they're doing
I feel like that's an entire sub genre, which is existing thing
But all but what if cute anime but what if cute anime? Yeah
But the changes to the the format and genre and battle system and whatnot or the ones where i'm like
That strays further away because I actually like the god's light
Yes, because I like the line of darkest dungeon and I like moving in that linear way
And I enjoy that setup way more than I enjoyed the grid, but also you enjoy anime more than those other things
That's not true. Yeah
I'll tell you what I do enjoy. Which one of those animes is your little sister
Uh
This one the new big fat guy from windjammer's two. Oh man
windjammer's two
Got to touch that for a little bit. Yeah
Uh, did you jam some wind? I did I did so two old characters two new characters
Um, uh, german guy is back and he's got a mustache. Is that are you serious?
Um, yeah, and then was that the motherfucking olympic stadium?
Uh, I mean it wasn't but yes it was we were looking at the trailer for windjammer's two in which the
Cyberfuture olympic stadium has a massive explosion going down the developers of this game are from france
So I don't know why are they making fun of us?
Uh, there's some people on their team that are from from montreal though. So that would explain it
Maybe the people drawing this that is fucking we just saw the olympic stadium in the trailer that that fucking piece of
Shit. Anyway, uh, yeah, so this trailer doesn't show off gameplay. It just shows you anime stuff happening. Yeah, anime
Um, but actual windjammer's two gameplay. It looks a lot like windjammer's. Yeah, except the sprites are
hand drawn and uh
Not pixelated but like smooth in that way. That's good. Uh, kind of looks like the streets of rage 4 stuff very similar to
you know, and uh new mechanics are
um
Very interesting. There's there's like fucking some crazy ass like super jumps and there's some crazy ass
uh, uh
What you call it? There's super jumps. There's a deflect where it's like the fastest way to send it back would be to
Hold the button down and like before
It arrives and before you don't even catch it you just slap it back right away
But you can't move while you're charging that button
So you have to commit to the place you're standing. Okay, believing that it's gonna come there
You so
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
It's a dangerous thing to do but the rewards are high and then
While you do all this you build meter and meter has supers and you can do the supers now
But you can do it by just spending that meter right away
So it doesn't always have to do be done with a like a tap up
You know because usually you tap it into the air and go ride on
Supersonic shoot and now you can just grab and do it. So
Uh, this game has a few quality of life additions and like one system change
And those things are going to almost ensure it as an esport
Like it just depends on how many people are willing to put their track suits on
Yeah, and put their neon shades on and like show up information and play it
but
When jammer's two is doing its thing, of course
It was right next to streets of rage 4 because they were at the same booth. That's correct because you know, yeah
same fucking publisher and whatnot
and streets of rage 4 I got to sit down actually I played a co-op with uh
A gentleman from from itzu and we both went through oh, yeah, and
This thing is cool, man
Um as a not streets of rage guy because I didn't have the sagas. I'm not a streets of rage guy. They're all beyond
Hey, what the fuck you talking about? You you never shut up about go straight
Yeah
You don't need to even like streets of rage
I the amount that you talk about it makes me think that you are a huge streets of rage mark
No, it's I'm a fan of the ability to make a good song out of the genesis sound chip. Okay. Well
Um axl and blaze were in this and uh the first thing that had that you noticed when you start playing the streets of rage 4 demo is that
Um when the characters walk out
They are super duper zoomed in. Yeah on the sprites to show you how nice they are up close
Sprites really nice then it zooms out now you play the game. Yeah
um
streets of rage mechanics are there
things that you would expect are there and um
Designs are all red and again. I'm not someone who's like has the level of like like Liam's faithfulness to the franchise
So I couldn't break down it break it down on like that level
But I can't say that what see what was in there with the juggle possibilities and a couple of
Uh combo string interrupters made things really really fun. You can grab dudes and throw them back to your boy
So that they he can juggle you can do
Like blaze has her instant air like attack into dive kick which bounces off the ground
Which sets up for juggles which you can then do a super or an air super
um
You know what I mean like you have enough control in there to do fun juggling and that's a huge part of why I would like
uh
complexity and beat them ups because
Sengoku 3 gave me a level of juggling fun that I never had before and this is giving you some of that freedom neon neon
Double dragon neon also did similar things
Who I need some water I've been I've been sorry I've been going and you're kind of dying and I apologize
um
For that my dumb cat Elmo yelled in my face all night
But I need to get some water because we're doing it and you get some water man. I was at packs
I played a lot of video games at packs. Hey, you need to hydrate the people need to know about the video games at packs
You need to water the woolly. All right
Am I just uh, yep
I'm a little sleepy
Sekiro doesn't need an easy mode could be in a bunch of babies. Just stop it. Just stop it
You guys want to talk about stuff that you're like worried about
I'm worried that every surface I touch in the world somebody smeared their genitals on it
Like when I wasn't looking
like before I came in here
I like what if woolly took his dick out and just smeared his balls on every part of this orange chair
to as a prank
And then one day
At the like at the end of the podcast we're like at castle super beast podcast
whatever
Like like Eli's in town or some shit and he comes to fill in and he goes to sit in the orange chair, right?
And then I'm all man you're you're whatever I'll sit I'll sit in the the fold-out chair and it was like no
No, Eli, you can't sit in the orange chair and Eli's like why he's like trust me. You don't want to sit in it
And I'm like I knew it
I I knew it
That's why it felt gross to sit in because it's like I'm sitting on like a
A fabric made entirely out of human testicles
I knew it. I knew all along
Boy, I'm not in a good mindset to stall for time
Well, he didn't just get water. He also went to the bathroom that motherfucker
I don't like to use consumable items in games
I've realized lately that this might be becoming a problem. It's just I was playing shovel night
And I couldn't force myself to use any of the sub weapons despite the readily available magic
Because what if I need it later, but then every on every screen you get like
50 mp back
And I'm like what the fuck am I doing?
I thought about it real hard in the shower. I stared at the wall
I was like I gotta use items
But then I was like what games should I use items and I was like
What about pillars? I was like I can't use items there and you can turn items into money
It's great to have money in a rpg like that
And I was like, oh man
I don't know what I'm gonna do
I was playing Resident Evil couldn't use a single shotgun shell and the whole end of the lab was stupid
What if I need it what if I need it later? What if I need it later?
Right
But what do you what do you do? What do you do if you need it later? Then you won't have it
It's better to not use it and then have it later and not need it
Then to use it now when you don't need it and then need it later and I'll have it
You know
How many showers a day do you guys take I feel like two is the right amount
I feel like you take one shower and it's like you get all the the grid off
Get all the grid off the shower, you know, like it's really just really scrub it
It's really you know
Come like a human being or whatever
Then later
When you're not quite as gross
You take a sex shower and that shower is just like
Yeah, being the shower is good
Yeah, nothing bad ever happened to nobody in the shower. I mean, okay, people have been murdered in the shower and
And also people fall down and died in the shower
And also people live like
Like been horribly ill in the shower and okay, so a lot of bad things have happened to people in showers, but I'm just saying like
Shower's like a peaceful place. It's like oh man
Water's warm and stuff and that's pretty cool
And like
If you like if you shit your pants in the shower you're not like
Wearing your pants and you just pretend it didn't happen
You just pretend it didn't happen
Just like going to the bathroom in general
Because it's disgusting
You know what else is disgusting moisture
He's talking about this yesterday. Hey woolly you left me alone too long. So I got all real weird in here. Oh, he's leaving again
okay
I was talking to people yesterday about this
About like what a good idea would be to like just remove all moisture from your body
Because the like sweat and like essential oils and shit is like disgusting
You would dry into a husk like
Dark souls body. Yeah real quick. Awesome. There's a character that feels clean from
There's a character from
Doctor horrible. Yeah, he's a sidekick villain. His name is moist. Yeah
He has the power to make things moist that sounds like the worst thing that's ever existed
Because like I was looking it up and apparently you can inject a bunch of poison in your hands to kill your sweat glands
To not have sweaty hands anymore
I mean I and I was like man
What if you could do that for every single part of your body and the listeners and then you would never sweat again
And the podcast listeners will look up to woolly and shout
Save us and then and I will look down and whisper and then
No, what if what if we made everyone else get that we could eliminate sweat from the world
Like the concept of sweat and everything would be dry
All right
So now you get to stall motherfucker because I have to pee by all means go ahead. You know why you know
Why I have to pee I have to get this disgusting liquid out of my body
And be dry inside
Speaking of disgusting liquid
Uh one of the games I played
Is rad from double fine and bandai
It's the game with the evolving
Like super retro look where you get the kid with the bat and then you got your powers
And you're surviving the post post apocalypse in a 3d action roguelike
rad rad
I uh got some hands on it real quick
And yeah, I mean so initially I'm like yeah the art style is not super my joint
Or at the very least like I don't know like something about it was a like
It wasn't it wasn't super duper like clicking, you know with me
But I do enjoy
The aspect of it where there's random mutation that you do you can't control what the fuck your kid's gonna grow into
So you get these all weird freakazoid powers and you're gonna get an arm that becomes a boomerang or
Like you can just start like secreting gas
Or laying eggs that do toxic things and weird stuff can happen to you like the powers you mutate are not always like
Actually rad powers and that you know, they're not actually powers that make you feel cool. Sometimes they're like, oh god
I'm a horrible debilitating weird creature, but they'll help me kill the enemies. So I guess I'll use those
Also, when you walk around you have okami feet that plant grass and grow life around you and that's a cool thing
So
You know, ultimately I was like those aspects are pretty cool
Uh cooler than I thought
Initially like was like, yeah, I think uh, you know, I'm like, uh, but then I touched it and I was like, okay
No, I had more fun with that and that's a rogue like so of course each time you do a new run
You learn how to
Are you do your progress?
You can kind of like save a little bit of it sometimes and take a better shot at it
Because you can die pretty easy when things kill you. So that's rad now. I'm bleeding
And it's like from the places that you just used. No, because that's bad
No, I'm I got a nosebleed, but like
And all I can think of right now is that it's disgusting
That my body is creating a liquid
But then it's happiness that some of my body has less liquid now
There's what happens when you leave me alone with with a microphone. Okay, uh quick look was had for gravity heroes
This is a game. It's an indie. It's looks a bit like other shooters where you kind of
Oh, do you want me to close the door? I mean the chat seems to really be concerned about the door
That the the app and that's what happens when you have a visual
but
You do you
I could easily just tilt it so that the camera is no longer including the door
Don't do that. And just like that. No one will ever know. In fact, you don't even have to close the door anymore
They don't know they'll they'll never know because it's gone from the visual. So anyway, um
What we got going on is this game gravity heroes and it's pretty much an it's really small. That's crazy. Um
And gravity and gravity heroes is is you know
It looks like many other sort of indie shooter run and gun things right now
But what is interesting is that you can uh at any point hit the tilt the right stick
And the direction you tilt it in becomes
These point of gravity that you get drawn towards
So your surface becomes any surface. Oh, that's kind of like gravity rose. Uh, yeah in 2d and
Enemies and stuff reflect that and so based on that sort of thing
It's kind of fun and difficult and you know to do fun things like suddenly if I want to dash towards you
I don't have to actually dash you just fall
I can just fall towards you while shooting at you and then turn it back down
To do the thing so gravity rush ideas exactly in a 2d way. Um
There be that
Okay, uh
More interestingly we I got to take a look at
um
Where was it? Where was it? Where was it? Where was it? There it is. Oh, yeah
so
Not too far from streets of rage 4 actually was the takeover
So matt was there got to chat for a bit
Got to take a look at how this uh was coming along seeing what's new
um
The most standout thing I'd say takeover has going for it besides the fucking baz
Is the fact that um
It's got
Uh
The gun system that like every character has a gun they can pull out
Wait really? I didn't know that everyone that you hold the r button and you pull out a gun
And then hey like you could just use it
And if you get any what downside is there?
Um ammo, okay, so you want to find ammo
To to do it, but while you're beating up you can also just do gun shit
Um, and it's got some fucking, you know fun wrestling moves and and said and you know good good combo jump potential has been increased as well
Uh, but yeah, the gun thing is is like you can use the if you fuck time it properly
You can like toss somebody and then like juggle them on the bullets as they go down the screen and do stuff like that
So, uh, yeah, I'd say that's the biggest standout feature is just like you're beat them up game where the characters can just pull out a fucking gun
That's weird. Um
So yeah, that that's shaping up real nice. I can't wait to see where that goes
Um and like the first thing I did was fucking fight the baz and it's like, oh, yeah
Oh, yeah, he's first. Well, I mean, I just went to this. Oh, okay
It was previously unlocked. I'm like, I want to see him
Where's my boy and he was there and he did the thing
so, um
Matt working hard behind that that that booth doing his thing and uh, I'm like
You're stuck behind here forever, right? Like you're just attached to that chair and it's like, yep. That's that's the role now
That's what happens when you take on that position
um
We got uh to look at we say we because we're the royal we at this point. No, I got to look at castle super boosts
Took a look at
Speaking simulator is a simulator. Wait, I'm sorry speaking simulator. Okay. I need help with this. You are not a human
You are a robot. Okay. You are trying to infiltrate and convince everyone
That you are a perfectly normal human. I got it. Yeah, so, uh, when Karen from hr asks you on a date
And you accept you have to then
Emulate a normal human speaking behavior by moving the tongue and your lips
And everything in such a way that it does not alert or cause suspicion
And see, uh, it is quite difficult to do so because the direction in which you move your lips and mouth
And move your tongue around is very very tricky and hard. Well, yeah speaking. It's actually an incredibly complex
It's very hard. Yes. It's quap for the face. Got it
All right
Now that was all fine and dandy and wacky and fun
But then what happened was they're like, hey, you know, if you come back a little later, we can show you something cool
And I came back and then they were like, okay here just for you because we only do this like once a day
And they went to the settings and they turned on face recognition. Okay
And then they went your mouth is now a controller
Shouldn't that make the game trivial easily? You would think yeah, but it's not asking you to make the noise of
Hello, Karen. Yeah, it's asking you to
Open up your jaw wide enough that the the face detection
considers that what the the puzzle needs
Okay for its input. So your your de de your mouth becomes a ddr pad where there's up down left and right
And you have to suck in parts of your face and move your mouth into the right positions
For each of the four directions as it asks you to do them overlapping with each other
And then you still have to move the keyboard to solve the tongue problem
It's way harder using your face
Way harder
But it was it was it was funny and I feel like if they get that working
You're gonna end up having a ton of footage of people just making goofy dumb faces go sticks like oh, yeah
Anyone people pulled cameras out now. Yeah. Oh boy. Oh, yeah. Well that that tweet never went out every time I was there going
Every single time I uh, I uh get into a fighting game and hit a combo
Yeah, I start giving a ghost a fucking ghost jobs a fucking proper proper deep throat. Yep. Yeah
You got the two-hander and you're getting the yeah, so that is what this is asking you to do
On purpose. Yeah, not like subconsciously like I usually do it to ghosts
But normally with just mouse and keyboard still quite yeah fucking hard
Um, I played edf
Iron rain. It's the new one
Shoutouts to the gentleman at the booth who was a fan who called is that an american one or an
It called me over Japanese. Okay. Um, it's prettier than any other edf. Yeah, not saying my lot there
Yeah, it's come away pretty ugly d3 publisher still doing what it does
Um, however, here's one thing that is sure
Despite all the improvements and things that make this better than I just saw you shoot ants
I saw ants getting shot despite everything that makes this probably the best of edf game ever or whatever
Yeah, whatever. I can't fucking do it. I can't do it. What's problem? I don't like they're fighting the hectors
Yeah, I don't like creepy bug legs like a
Face really. I don't want them. I don't want the creepy bug legs right now
One of those people that sees a spider in a game. You want to mod it out or no
I can deal with that, but it's just like in this like in this case
I'm just like, yeah, like as long as I kill them and while they're far away. It's fine
Okay, but when they get up super close. I'm like, I don't want so if I were to throw like a bottle of ants at you
You'd freak out
Normal sized ants. Yeah. No. Okay. It's big ants. Yeah
What if they were like larger than average ants? So I just
I didn't enjoy that and I was like, I'm not gonna ever be able to really get into this franchise
So god bless is it really
Well, we're born with these we you know, you know, definitely not born with the fear of giant bugs because that's not a real
No, but you're born with the fear of giant things that are non humanoid because you know what as a tiny person
I got over there real fast. It's why we it's why we fear snakes
Because they move yeah, but you you're your dna does no, I know
Okay, well it does but it doesn't because as human beings in the same way that I've had a bunch of snakes snakes are cool
Okay, you're not listening um
So because snakes move strangely and differently in a they do it's cool from humans. Yeah, we have a uh like
Natural aversion to that type of movement. No, I don't from
Okay, well then oh fuck me but
Snakes are cool. Okay. So there have been articles written about how human beings
tend to avoid certain things based on snakes are dry
That's the best part about them human beings tend to whether you do or don't
Avoid certain things based on our evolution of
Being like that's a bad get away from that. No a natural a natural fear is like being afraid that somebody smeared their dick on everything in the room
That's in your dna that makes me more sense. Yeah. Yeah, you're born with that. Yeah, right even back when
Everyone's dicks were smeared on everything because dicks were all out all the time
That's right because what's close. Oh, no, it's different because now it's societal you just go up to and touch things
Yeah, that's that's in your dna. Yeah, that's in your dna. Great. Uh, panzer paladin
Uh, another retro game
Very pretty pretty sprites
Um, oh fuck. There's no big trailer here, but this game was actually really cool
Um, and it was more or less like
Again, you want to talk about your throwback style. This is extremely throwback, right your shovel nights
There's actually much more throwback than a lot of throwback stuff we've seen. Um, but but what you have is uh,
A character that has a ability to swing
Upstab downstab throw the lance pick up a new weapon
And then circle or b was like just like instant back dash like um
Sounds like vulgar the viking a little bit symphony of the night type of thing
And then you can get out of the robot and then you can grapple swing
And then you can do stuff and then teleport the robot over to you. So panzer paladin was also pretty um, cool
Yeah, it was a simple fun thing that I played very briefly and I enjoyed it
uh
worth a mention
dusk
Was the crazy game where you can do rainstorms, but with wolfenstein slash doom graphics. Yeah games out
Dusk is out. Yeah, it's not forever. Great dusk is great. Uh, we played it on shitstorm like two years ago
Great dusk is great. I loved it a lot. I had a good time with it and the devs were
Showing off some cool stuff. It was good. Um
You can buy that right the fuck now if you want fantastic zarvot a game about cubes. This is a multiplayer game
I love cubes and multiplayer four-parter
Four player what do you do with the cubes? So the cubes shoot at each other. Yeah, they also super dash teleport
Uh, they do explosive melees. They sidetrack and they charge into crazy beams
And you try to kill each other
But you're killing each other with like edging and zoning and like
Super dash tech
Um, that's weird. It's very stylish. But when you see your first cube put up a shield
And then like the next one drifts around the stage from that
Corner from that shield and then lands a fully charged laser shot you go. Oh fuck. That's pretty stylish
Oh, man a game with just cubes cubes. I love cubes cubes doing super stylish things. Oh, man
Uh, you remember zao zao?
Yes, remember the cool ass stick figures doing cool shit
Yes, I do and you're like, I don't even care about the fact that they're stick figures because they're just doing rags like that
But cubes that's what it is cubes are dry zarvot's doing cool shit
Cube cube cube mo bod. Yeah. Oh bod
I'm so tired of talking. You know what the final boss that should be
Should be a fox
cube
It should be called qb
Like Kirby but made out of cubes. No like like Naruto fox. Yeah, but qb
But the but the qb character that's qbby already exists. Oh, that is it exists
But I don't know that then cube Kirby got made this weekend. Yeah, so but that wasn't real
But qb. I'm so fucking glad it ended up. We didn't do the fucking podcast on April Fools
That would have been there was so much fucking stupid shit yesterday. That would have been dumb
We would have been reporting on Splatoon island. Yeah, because that was so elaborate and detailed
That it's like why the fuck wouldn't that be right? I think that well April Fools stopped being fun when uh
Video game people started to show off April Fools jokes that are things that you just actually want
Yes, like that that's when it stopped being fun. Yeah, I think um
What was it? Yeah, no like Liam said hey the uh fucking quote the the the
Thing of the year the April Fools of the year goes to
Uh
The Splatoon island and I and I and I said just something to the effect of like
The more it hurts you. Yeah the the the more it deserves the crowd the one that was really bad as well was um
The yakuza guys showed off like this incredibly elaborate demo for what like a turn-based RPG and
Camarocha would look like and it looks amazing and it's like just do that just fucking do that
I would I would buy that in a second. Okay. Yeah, like yeah, so virtual fighter r
Or whatever the fuck that was which was vf with street fighter moves the more it hurts you
The more it it's like well, this is not fun anymore and then for honor like made itself unplayable for a day
I love that one. I love that one a lot
The fucking rabbits replaced all the soldiers. It's really awful. You know, you didn't see what it was like
I saw what it was like. I I took a look. It was great. Really bad. Really enjoyed it. It's gross
Um, there was one I uh, I touched really briefly and this is a chinese game
That was extremely hard to find on the internet. There's no much footage of it anywhere. It's only a couple screenshots
It was it was pretty stylish though. It was called
uh
heterotopias in the in the 1989 future
Uh heterotopias for sure. All right and
Um, it was very much like ruiner. Uh, if you remember that I do
Uh, and you would fight
hand-to-hand ruiner though
And it had lots of retro cool stuff looking. I see a lightsaber. Yeah, and uh, you do some stuff
And it was like you had a deep button and a dodge button you bought a boss and it was like, okay
Yeah, there's some fun stuff. This can be kind of cool. It looks like ruiner
Yeah, there's some bugs and the frame rate was pretty rough and it had some it was yeah, it was chinese ruiner
Yeah, and um, it was it was you know
It's got some ways to go but some ideas were there and the main character was pretty fucking stylish
And uh, they appeared to be very excited that I was there trying the game out and it was fun
whatnot, but anyway the the game has these um, um
Travis touchdown moments where you power up temporarily and you get your fucking lightsaber out
So you get your like your uppercut into shotgun fist dash dash
And then hack that motorcycle from a distance and make it crash into that guy. Yeah, that's pretty cool
So like you know the it has all those bits and pieces
Okay, wait, are you afraid of snakes?
No, okay
But I'm not even afraid of snakes that I'm not afraid of snakes, but I'm I'm science has said you shut up. Fuck off
Um, I'm sorry, man. I'm really tired. It must be how I look. I know and I feel bad, but I'm
I feel bad that that that um
I'm like, well, let's do packs and go through all these things and whatnot and I'm sorry that you're so tired
No, you totally that went right over your head. Don't worry about it. No, you call back to the yeah
I know that really revenge. This is bitchy revenge. Really really cinched you, huh? Oh, yeah
No, no, I know it works. It works out for me. Page takes it. Okay
Oh, don't worry the closer I can get to a skeleton
I all there. Oh, yeah. No, I I was involved in that. Okay. Yeah, then you're gonna take the burn
Yeah, no, that was that was uh, that was uh, that was uh, that was a hey, should I do this? Yeah, you should do that
That's a good idea. Hey, you know what might be happening at packs. Yeah, I'm at your might be at a business meeting
Oh, so yes, you might be at some sort of important place where and the choice to not use
Uh mediums like uh twitter or twitter where you know where the garbage can go because when you send a text message with a photo
The photos pop up on the phone. Yeah, and uh, and then who saw it. Yeah. Yeah, so phones are a thing of trust
Yeah, yeah, who saw it? Yeah. Yeah, you don't need to worry about that. Oh, that's good
But you will take the burns on all yeah, all yeah of your fucking ginger brethren and sister in
maybe
As long as we don't do that 23 and me shit whoever's around whoever's around will fill the raft
Yeah, you share the same. You know what? No, it was important. It was kirby lore share the bar very important
You saw that image. Yeah
I
Fucking blown up my phone
Please tell me you took that out and there were people around you. Please. You know who was around who german spy was
Ah, yeah
I'm gonna fucking talk to him later
No, he didn't see it. I didn't see it. He didn't see it
I we're not at that. We're not at a level where I felt comfortable
Going there just yet, but it made you think right? Yeah, it certainly did. Um
This is the best I'll tell you who did see it. Yeah, you know the creator of y2k
That's why
That's what that tweet was about
But but not just about that but just from all also being familiar with page, you know
Like wait what I'm like. Yeah, so this you want to talk up to speak of the fucking devil. Look at this shit
I got kirby lore sent to me. Yeah, no no page found a very important image that related to kirby lore
It was very important and we and she was like should I send this to woolly?
I'm like you should absolutely send it to woolly and I thought she was gonna send it to you on twitter
And then she's like, okay, so I texted it. I'm like you texted it
It was
I knew
The moment that happened I was like, this is deliberate
You don't switch over to text suddenly unless you're trying to fucking get shenanigans going quite elaborately
Oh, that's good. Oh, that's good. Well, I mean you learned something, right?
Phones
Are a thing of trust. You don't know what's like on this side of it. You don't know what shows up on my first phone
You wouldn't believe what skeletons what skeletons can do
It's awful
I played skate burb skate bird skate burb. Okay, skate burb is a game about burb
Trying its best to skate for it. That's got headphones on. Yeah, skate burb. Oh, it's using a trick a trick deck
Or what it was called finger deck finger deck. Yeah, skate burb is a fucking burb skate bird. It's skate bird
Yeah, and guess what it plays like
Tony Hawk questions you're a bird and you just Tony Hawk. Yep
Yeah, done. Yeah done. That's it. You know that hawk also means bird
There you go
My one question was will there be other burbs?
I was told
Yes, yes
Yeah, because you're playing as like a fat cardinal there, but you could play as a different type of bird
There will be multiple. Okay. So you know what would make Tony Hawk really cool
Is if you could unlock a hawk, right?
But then the hawk is like a bird and then it's Tony's fucking head
On it
I would feel like it's head. I would be uncomfortable with that
Which is why they should do it. Yeah, they should do it
Uh, no one was standing next to it
But it was just out like it feels like someone just rolled a tv in
And turned it on and put controllers next to it and just fucked off. Yeah, but like there's no one there
There was a setup anonymously running samurai gun too. Oh really and hey, guess what?
It's samurai gun. This feels like a start to like a hidden camera show. Basically
Uh samurai gun is doing a samurai gun thing and guess what it's still really good. Yeah, except I'm seeing around
There's a bunch of characters with names and identities and designs
That seems to be the usual path for that type of indie game. Yeah
So the first time it's just a bunch of pixels doing whatever and then the next time they make those pixels have identities
Yeah, and that's it
Samurai gun two. It's more
More samurai gun. Mm-hmm. Can't can't go wrong with that. Can't go wrong
Colt canyon is
An enter the gungeon style roguelike type thing except you are doing a western cowboy thing. Yeah, and a bunch of um
unmarked silhouettes
that appear to be savage take your
Uh
Silhouette girlfriend away and you as a silhouette cowboy have to go out and shoot them. Oh, that's a cool art style. Yeah
Um, again, they're all silhouettes. So you're a silhouette cowboy
fighting other
silhouette
Savage people
I
Yeah, it's I saw they were using katanas
I saw they were using katanas boy. Does it dance but nonetheless, uh, you shoot and dance woolly. I'm I'm dan
I did this was funny
But yeah, yeah, you fucking just the only issue I can see with this game right away
Is that the silhouette style is like kind of blending into the background for some of the enemies
It makes them a little hard to see sometimes there isn't like a black outline around the the white shapes
So I feel like maybe they but but you like
It might be intentional because sometimes you hit like rays of light that are super bright anyway
Oh, yeah, but anyway. Um, yeah, what are you? What are you gonna say? You know, it's fucking. Yeah, it's one of those
Uh, what do you what do you call them like running gun?
The twin sticks twin stick roguelikes. Yeah, twin stick roguelikes. It's a shooter
Uh shoot shoot talked about this one a little bit earlier before one step from eden it is the uh
No frills get the filler out
Mega man battle network fast fast go hyper addition
Yeah, if you like mega man mega man battle network
But you hated everything that was not the combat and I mean literally everything
Because the game you press start in this and then it begins a bloody palace. Yeah, right
I saw this uh at mag fest and I looked at it for about five seconds one
That's too much for me and then walked away. It was it's really fun
Yeah, it is but like a man battle neck more bloody palace with decks of moves that you randomly
Pick up between fights. Well, you choose which one of the mega man's bloody network
And then you reshuffle the deck to to randomly get the moves and then you just have to react to crazy patterns and battle network style
And it's it's it's very cool. And I'm like is there going to be and he's like multiplayer is coming. Yay
So, uh, yeah
Now everyone is happy
You know if you wanted more of that and capcom is not giving you more battle network
No, they sure aren't one step from Eden is more than battle network
It's fucking battle network extreme hyper plus. So yeah
one step from Eden
Played mk 11 nothing new to say there. Guess what that game looks cool
You see max talking about the the youtube stuff at that
No, everybody's getting flagged all the time
Why for that shit because gore
Inappropriate for audiences. Well, yeah, and then uh people are like well
What about your old video about like mk 10 like fatalities?
He's like those were all performed on sub zero who has blue blood and youtube's shit didn't pick it up
That's really really funny. I didn't know that was a thing. Yeah
That's how you avoid it. Yeah, but it's like
The content then do it on reptile content creation. Yeah reptiles not in the game
Well, yeah, but yeah like content creation for that game looks kind of dicey because like
Pretty much any footage is getting flagged for inappropriate for audiences on on youtube. Uh gearis gearis doesn't have red blood
Yeah, no, but you're not like i'm talking matches
Like i'm talking like yeah, generalized content. Yeah
um, and then uh, lastly got hands on with erratus lord of the dead
This appears to be a darkest dungeon clone
Okay, uh, and how cloney of darkest dungeon is it cloney? Is it well if we get a get a gameplay video?
And so this this cutscene shit. Um, give me one screenshot one human being screenshot
That's darkest dungeon, man
Darkest dungeon is just really darkest dungeon. Yeah, that is a clone. That is a fucking clone. Yeah. Oh, it's good. So
Uh, a had one thing you play as the monsters instead of the humans. Okay. Okay, cool
And when you suck kill and when your monsters die, you can like use body parts to make new ones
Cool. So it's almost as if you're playing the opposite team. Yeah, that's good
I like that and one thing there was an ability that one thing had was like you can put a character
That was like an archer on overwatch
Right, huh?
So they're doing the if anyone moves they get shot thing
But then you can use the other character to push and pull their abilities around
So you're doubling and tripling damage on certain things and i was like, oh, that's really cool
I enjoyed that so but anyway, uh, it is a clone as fuck darkest dungeon clone. That's cool. Um
I'm not sure what else to say besides that. Hey, you went to packs, right? Mm-hmm. Did you happen to check out the borderlands presentation?
No, I caught tweets where everyone yelled about how cringy it was. It was real bad, dude
I didn't get to watch it myself, but I heard there's card tricks involved. I caught up and like
Like randy pitchford was like stalling for time by doing like embarrassing card tricks on stage
All I do know is that there were there was new fucking new woolly bait. Yeah
Borderlands 3 everyone get excited for the epic store
Everyone get excited for those abs
Did you see them? Yeah, that's all
Okay, so here's the part where my reporting on borderlands 3
will consist entirely
Of the fact that there's this character
and she looks very cool
And she has these big old zurra's wrath glowing arms for punching she does
And she's got a ponytail, but they're short here on the sides
But she's got this cool thing and she's got purple and she looks like a ride character very very good woolly bait
Yeah, I haven't watched the trailer. I don't know
She's siren
Siren character
also, uh, rice and
Reese got a mustache. Reese got a mustache. She's back and uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, what's her name? Whatever
Laura Bailey
um recent um
You're doing it man. You're doing a great job. Well chat will catch everyone's party chat will catch up
Chat will catch up. Yeah chat will catch up
Fiona, thank you. Yeah, um
You're doing it. You're doing a good recent Fiona our back. So that's really fun
uh
Which uh went out and that uh, I got to crack the news to
Uh, some of the telltale folks that worked on telltale at the time and I was like, oh, did you see recent
Fiona are back and they're like what? Yeah, look at this and you're like
They give a mustache. I was like, yeah, they're like, wow, you know, so that's weird, man
So that's cool. But like, yeah, yeah
um, um
Yeah, cool that uh, they got they got capped because those are cool characters recent fin are cool. Yeah
Yeah
Apparently the writing is going to be closer to borderlands one, which is really important
Yeah, I I first yeah, do you play borderlands one or two?
Borderlands two was like a fucking meme apocalypse and it was like
Consistently bad and people generally
Lay the blame on that like pretty sorely at the feet of anthony birch
So yeah, but the tiny tina stuff, right? Yeah, but like just imagine that but the whole game just non-stop
And then one and was and is like way more reserved and it's just kind of like kind of black humor kind of dry kind of thing
Um, and is that is that how most people felt?
Yeah, I would say like you can you look at the chat and see if everybody thinks i'm full of shit, right? But like
um, I I foresee like I foresee the border the borderlands three having a writing style that is way closer to one
except for claptrap
Who will just be a fucking
Like absolute non-stop meme machine, but that's fine because everyone in universe fucking hates claptrap
So that's good
So card tricks, huh?
Yeah
And he was like running around on stage all weird and shit
Look like a like from what I could tell look like a guy friday. He's gonna go to jail
I was like any magic usb keys from behind the ear. Uh
I think I think people in the sleight of hands like sleight of hands said some kind of joke about that
But their presentation broke like that was the weirdest thing about it. Was it stalling for time?
Yeah, it was stalling for time because their presentation broke, but I have they couldn't get the video to play
Okay, but a friend of mine told me though that like he has done similar card tricks on stage
Yeah, I went and saw me and lean went to a fucking game design conference in montreal
And randy was there giving a speech and he was like hey magic. Ha magic. So it's not completely out of the world
Yeah, no, he is obsessed with being a part-time magician. There's a precedent for that and making people's money disappear. Ha, but um
Yeah
So anyway, I just are untrustworthy. Uh, well
I mean after a certain age
How about that? I'll qualify it because there's an age
That it's like yeah after a certain age a lot of things are untrustworthy. That's what I'm saying
Moving on magic is uh
Magic is a is a profession that yeah should be locked to yeah
I mean the younger you are the the more awesome it is that you're a magician. Yeah, it's adorable
It's crazy then after with what kind of magic you see on a usb key
Then after a certain point you're not in elementary school anyway
Well because in elementary school you put on a magic show for the class. Okay, so we
We were going in different directions
But I thought yeah, we're talking card tricks card tricks. All right, then you put on a hat for
Birthday party magic, right? All right, then in in high school, you know like my friend that we need to get out of this
All right
All right, there any news there's actual news. All right
The big one cracked while we were talking. Yep, and we're on the update of the update of this story
So we didn't have the original I haven't even looking at it. So the update is involving a bioware response
To a Kotaku article did about anthems development. Okay, so we are we are three or four rounds deep
Okay, so I'm gonna just backtrack so uh Kotaku put out an article a few hours ago
that uh
Spoke with a bunch of devs under conditions of anonymity and the long and short of it is that every single part of anthems development was
Insanely fucked up. It really only started real production like a year and a half ago
The 2017 e3 trailer was completely fake
And that was essentially the trailer that they made and then took back to the team and said this is what the game is
Like versus 13. Yeah
And flying had been cut and recut and put back in at every stage of development
And the reason why the game is in a state that it is is that when they showed it to Patrick Soderland of ea
The game was so pathetic that he's like you need to do something crazy
And all they had that worked at the time was flight
So they put it back in the game to show it to him so they wouldn't get cancelled
And then it was like that's amazing. That's what the article says. Yeah, okay
And this was all confirmed from Kotaku multiple sources speaking to multiple sources and uh
basically every every guess that we had about the game's development
About why it was fucked up and the last second bug fixes, especially the stuff you were saying Willie
That's like just plugging holes. Yeah, like 100 dead on. Yeah, okay, and like as of 2018
The release date had been set, but like they had not made a single mission
Like was there anything pointing to the the other guesses about like how this is like
We this is a restart
No, in fact what it was is that there were like
Tons of prototypes of what the game was all the way through the end of 17
But they could never figure out which one it was supposed to be despite having prototype after prototype going back to like
2011 I think it was I imagine there's a lot of people who uh are not super proud about like their names being on
What is currently going on fucking fire?
Yeah, the games on fire
It described just tons of senior staff burning out and we're just quitting in the middle of development
Them watching uh EA Montreal burn down and going at least that's not us and then them starting to burn down
and then people in EA
Bioware Austin
going
Fuck and like a weird fucked up. You know how how fans of game studios
Say like there's the a team and the b team. Yeah, Bioware did that internally
Which causes a lot of tension when you're bringing in Bioware Austin to help you out to piss on your fire essentially
And people in Edmonton going well, we're the a team. We're gonna clutch it out because we're real Bioware
not like Austin
and all the fucking
Everything about anthem has been a trash fire behind the scenes as well. There was a bio war. Yes
And there may have been some bio mutants
Not german though. No
But yeah, every single part of this game is about as fucked up as you would have thought it was
uh, and apparently
I can't believe there's a real response. I want to see what this response is. What is the response to the article?
I mean the
The fucking one one upsmanship of the and or the the hold my beer olympics that yeah
That is the file fallout are playing with each other. It's unbelievable
As I want to say never before seen a never before seen results. Can we say it broke new ground?
these two games
Have legitimately broken new ground
It broke
The response appears to be
If I may read for the first time live on the air. Yeah
um, and we got a quote here
We'd like to take a moment if it's a long quote
All right, we might all right. We might we'll we can do it. We can do it. You can you know what?
Okay, hold on. Where is this? Where is this article? It is on uh, heavy.com. But we can we can we can just go
How do we go? Okay, because I can read really fast
So I can we'd like to take a moment to address an article published this morning about bio air and anthems development
First and foremost, we wholeheartedly stand behind really heavy.com
Yeah, you sure? Okay
Slash games slash. Okay slash games slash bio air
um
First and foremost, we wholeheartedly stand behind every current and former member of our team that worked on the game including leadership
Takes a massive amount of effort energy and dedication to make any game and making anthem would not have been possible without every single one of their efforts
We chose not to comment or participate in this story because we felt there was an unfair focus
On the specific team members and on specific team members and leaders who did their absolute best to bring this totally new idea to fans
We didn't want to be part of something that was attempting to bring them down as individuals
We respect them all. We built this game as a team
Yeah, so this is a response uh, because uh, all of the people kataku interviewed
Pretty much laid the blame at the feet of like the top five people in charge
Okay, and said they never took charge and they would have design meetings about like hey
What is this enemy type of bow? Okay, and they would argue are you are you stop pause? All right, so um
The chat is yelling that we didn't read the article. So I would like to find out
Uh, I read that article this morning on the way over here. Okay, so I'd like to find out as the yelling occurs live
Yeah, let's get corrected and let's be wrong. Let's update our what we know that is this is hot
This literally came out while we were on the air that is in response to pretty much everybody kotaku
Spoke to during the pre-production phase, which was like four years. They would go into an uh, oh not us
Ea didn't read the article. Oh bio where didn't read the article. That's what they're saying. Okay
Everyone's yelling they didn't read it not us as they but they're saying this response was made without them reading it
Uh, I see what that's weird
Um, but very what the fuck the the the the general takeaway is like you would go into a
Meeting with like your senior designer and you would go how is this going to work and you would argue for hours and then
No decision would be made
and then you would
You like about how missions were going to work or how inventory was going to work or how saving was going to work or whatever
And then you would be sent back to your desk to keep working on the thing you just decided that you didn't know what you were going to do
And that happened for years
So that's how first time games from first time
Like directors and such come together
Where you don't realize
That you you can't just make things up on the spot
So a lot of the blame on this is being leveraged in a couple places like like what are the biggest problems
Casey Hudson left you can't feature creep a game into existence. Yeah, Casey Hudson left and you can and casey's the kind of guy who
They described it as the enterprise where Casey Hudson was Picard and everybody just did whatever the fuck he said for better or worse
So very very clear vision despite that then as the shit would catch on fire people left one guy died
Like just just
Vacancies at the top for leadership positions essentially and then the people that are left there
Just like we need a decision on the way this shit works so that we can build it
And then no decision would get made
And so it wouldn't get built or it would get built and then thrown out
I mean people leaving is always multiple like you're like this is this burnout combined with this is a mess combined with
I can spend my time doing better things combined with this stress isn't worth it
Yeah, I see where this is going. I want no part of it. I need to get my name off these credits
There's a million things that come into mind when you decide that quitting is the better
Yeah, the other thing is that there are people that were given like
Mids
Pretty much all levels of staff
But it was more damaging the higher up they were that were working so much crunch the whole time
That their their doctors told them
Take a couple weeks take a couple months off doctors orders
And then some of those people just didn't come back
So some right like some of those points sounds like points that came up during andromeda
Yep, and specifically the article goes into the fact the the quote is
The success of dragon age inquisition is the worst thing that has ever happened to this company
Um because dragon age inquisition was made in a fucked up
Comes together at the last second hyper crunch scenario. So it worked out in that case and it worked out
And and it also changed the direction of like the types of games they'd be making and that caused
Over management to go. Well, that works and they have a really
They had a like decades long culture there. That's brutal called the Bioware magic
Which I know a bunch of other devs that work this way and so do you and you probably work with them
Game is a trash fire right up until two months before launch and then it just gets and then it just bam
All comes together at once. Okay that that magic is not magic. Yeah, it's called
Literally, it is called massively experienced talented individuals who know how to
Clean it up at sacrifice of 10 of their life, right problem is those people were gone
Yeah, and so the Bioware magic couldn't happen and the game was too big people on the team
Like slay they fucking monkey paw. Yeah chunks of their life force away to make these things come together and
like there's more um
three months
Christ two months ago blood magic
I think two months. Uh, no, sorry not two months ago two months before launch
They're like doing the itemization and they realized there's literally nowhere in the game that people can see your gear
So the launch bay area where you walk around and see your shit was outsourced. I think
That's why it's so different. That's why it sucks also like months before the game came out fucking
So like at the time of shock multiplayer at the time of the premium beta
Demo, whatever the fuck that is that shit was like six weeks old
Huh
And then you just and and because you no one would see it because they're like, oh, we accidentally
Made a game about itemization, which by the way was not the case up until like the end of 2018
And uh-oh now there's nowhere to see it
Well, I mean in in instances. Yeah, they talked about how uh part of like the the issues a lot
The the engine was a massive problem the whole way down
But because FIFA was having trouble
EA took all the frostbite engineers that existed at Bioware and took them away from them to go work on FIFA
And just left them high and dry. Well, yeah, because FIFA FIFA's the blood
But it means like they had people that were like at at Bioware that could fix the engine and now they didn't FIFA is the truth
The light in the way. Um, there's nothing more important at any time. God. There's more FIFA. Um
Dragon Age 4
Got cancelled in this process
Um to get staff off of it to work on Anthem and has been restarted
Under a different project so Dragon Age 4 got killed and resurrected and restarted
In the past six months. That's what the idea over this. That's what that article says. Yeah
It used to be code named Joplin and now it's code named something else under a much smaller team
There may have been corroborative whispers. Yes, I know
Yes that have been on the winds about I have also heard from my own people corroborative whispers about some of the um
Aspects of like the asset creation
And like let me give you an example of how bad this was in terms of restarting it
They had been building the whole game as a pseudo realistic online shooter
But not a loot one and had decided to take
Flying out and then built the world accordingly before they were told
16 months ago to put flying back in and redesign the entire game assuming that the character could fly
Uh-oh
oops
like
Okay, I only have one question ask me a question. I mean because I want to scroll down
I read that article twice. So I think I have a pretty decent grasp on it. Okay. I want to scroll down to the bottom of their response, right? Yeah
Is this
Not the not uh, is this the worst or whatever is this your your golden example of
Everyone knows you should pull out
But you've spent too much money
no
actually
this is
This game was worked on in pre-production for like four five years
And it was like the the the quote is that we never had an elevator pitch for the game
There was literally never an elevator pitch for the game. By the way, but an anthem is not what this game is supposed to be
That's not the game's name. Well, surely not if the game's name is beyond
But like three weeks before e3 when it was supposed to be shown
EA's like we can't get that trademarked
Hmm
So fuck it. It's anthem now and people went what the fuck is anthem and then they had to retrofit
The fucking name anthem into the game's story
Also the first writer they brought on
Left
And then the second writer they brought on quit
Yeah before the game shipped, which is why the for everything about the game's story is a fucking mess. They describe how
Okay, this is my favorite part. This is my favorite part
Word from on high comes down
in a in a fucking
Document that says this game has to be unmemable
That's a directive from corporate
Written down. Yeah, and the question comes back. What the fuck is that we went force respect
And they went mass effect andromeda is an embarrassment for the company
You with the face only because of the memeable. Yes. That's why yes, they're afraid of not the
Not the content. No, it's the fact that my face is tired became a meme
So they say here's a little here's money
You are going to spend the you are going to spend a shit ton of money on performance capture, right?
So you look at anthem and guess what the facial animation is really high quality, right?
But leads to dialogue in which they're talking about characters as if they're not there, but they are there
And they're talking about events that didn't happen as if they happen and that's because
They spent all that money on performance capture a year ago
But then the missions those characters were in changed around them and they literally didn't have the time or money to re-record those lines
Or performance captures. Can we just jump cut to the hard future where like the metacritic?
Bonus we got the meme doc. Yeah
Where for every major meme that makes it over a certain threshold of popularity on social media
You get docked a bonus. Yeah
Corporate says no memes. Oh my god, and and then by accident they make a game like so
kind of
Oatmeal you gotta put there or kind of aren't that many anthem memes someone in someone in qa
Did did meme team playthroughs where it's like can somebody meme this take it out?
Yeah, go through and go through this filtering for memeables. By the way, I don't know if developers know this
I'm sure most of them do
Um memes can be good for your game
Sure can funny jokes about Dante being a fucking idiot gay cowboy riding his motorcycle into people's faces
And dancing like a asshole goofy two framers. Guess what that translated into dollars. Who I have pizza
There are people who saw okay. Did you see the phone? No, don't look at him. He is not motivated
Did you see the meme image? You cannot be that's just powerful being all serious and shitting like Dante now
We will fight and then the next panel is Dante with the hat driving the fucking
Motorcycle into his fucking mouth. Yes. Yeah, someone bought the game because of that
They're like at least one person saw that and went okay. I gotta know what this game is and bought the game
A class bug found type category meme m
Screenshot attached m for meme
severe
fixed immediately
Look at thing about mr. X dude
How many people might have bought that game because the mr. X meme was like way more far-reaching than
The game's actual marketing. Yeah capcom's meme income. It's high fucking roof and it's always been high
nintendo's too
Except for when they choose to refuse except when they refuse the memes. Yes, but then that makes the memes
Their resistance only makes the memes harder. Okay, the power grows. It gets vaneer as it goes on
Oh
If you deny my meme it grows only by the girth of my veins
That meme's getting in somehow or another and nintendo can't stop it. All right, that's
Into the public consciousness. We need dry memes. All right. Can I get some dry memes?
Can I start like a dry me like you know respectful memes? You see that you follow that twitter account?
Wow, I didn't think that's where I thought you were like as opposed to the lubricated ones
Yeah, that was the double entendre I was going for okay, well you did get it
Okay, you did get it. All right, because I don't want to follow the wet memes twitter account. No, no, no, no, no
No, no, no the moist memes. Don't do that don't do that
um
Yeah, the more you shame it
The more powerful it grows. That's a hero aca character. You know that oh really? Yeah
No, I guess I haven't it's in the spin-off vigilantes
It's a it's a hero aca character that is like shame is it's like the hulk but instead of anger it's shame shame me
And it's hulk. Sorry. It's shame equal power. Okay, and so he starts off by streaking right embarrassing
And then he's like, okay. Well, you kind of get used to streaking. Yeah
So uh, then I think it's like he starts digging up like high school fan fiction that he wrote
And all sorts of stupid shit you would have to work yourself to the next level to find new new powerful shame
Abilities that that's pretty impressive
I don't envy that at all
That's unfortunate because you have to really believe it. Yeah, you have to really feel bad shame. Yeah
uh, okay, so uh, yeah
There we go read that article it's one poll that didn't occur
is
So surprising and and confusing. Okay, so basically what they end up this thing with is
emphasis on workplace culture
Fuck off
New IPs are hard as a studio and a team we accept criticism
Um, people put passion and energy into making something fun. Don't tear down another's work
Focus on the players continuing to make anthem better for the community
There's a lot of people who worked really hard on anthem that saw all their good work
Literally thrown away and have their names on that credit and games that were not anthem, right and apparently yeah
So hey, yeah
Hey, you know, here's what hey, let me let me drill down to what that actually means
Uh, don't talk shit about the people who are still actually in charge, please
um
But the main thing hey why this happened and the the general thing is like hey, guess what kasey hudson's gone the doctors are gone
The vast majority of biowares original staff from the 90s now work at a city and
It's the the people who run that ship and have run that ship to greatness don't work there anymore
Speaking of ships
And memeables. That's right. Let's ship some memes
Or meme some ships sassans creed three. Yeah
What about it reg released? Yeah on the hd. Yeah, that's right the remaster remastered remodeled. What happened to it?
Well, uh, we have some some tweets here that i've linked in the in the description. I didn't see this so i'm excited
i'm really if you want to if you want to uh go to the uh the description of
You can see the tweets and where we have characters where their models go from faces like that back in the day
Two faces like this. Are you fucking?
every model was replaced and uh, they all that looks like shit between 2012 and 2019
I can only describe it as um
It looks like it's going from pre production
Like or it looks like it's going from from final release to pre-production to pre-production. That looks like shit
Uh, this is like silent hill. What the fuck like hd collection levels. Let's go down to the next one. Shall we?
What the fuck man? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, we've got we've got uh, you know one of the sassans creed three was really impressive
Release and and and yeah
They the and the worst part I think is the fact that not just how bad the model quality and textures and that are all
Fucked up with these screenshots, but the fact that the lighting of the entire world is gone
Because they also didn't do that. Okay, so this got outsourced
This got outsourced to some fucking port uh more job hack fucks. It's it's it's kind of nuts
Because the original game ran really badly
So i'm going to assume this was all done as like that most hack neat attempts at all my fucking god. That looks so bad
Holy shit, dude. By the way, fun fact. I heard people complaining about this, but I didn't see it
He can't buy ac3 on the pc anymore. Is that gone? It's gone
ac remastered is the only one that exists
Yeah, so
Also, you do you remember um, uh sleeping dogs definitive edition
Uh, okay on the pc that version is absolutely not definitive because it is way worse than the original pc version
Because it's a port of the improved console version with all sorts of new bugs that doesn't look nearly as good
Yeah, I didn't touch that one
But when the pc version of definitive edition came out they delisted the original much better version
This happens quite often actually that sucks. It really does suck. I did not I did not
I'm probably still in the credits on it though
Well, you did a good job because I didn't run into a bug once
Oh boy
Ubisoft, uh
Oh, you be soft. Yeah. Oh, that's unfortunate
Now I saw I saw an article that was called something to the effect of um
Assassin's creed 3 is a lot better when you go in expecting to hate it
That was like wow that game sucks that game's really bad big disappointment the the potential though. It was america
We were going to do assassin's creed america
Connor
run in with the wolves
Wilderness area. Yeah boats boats though boats though boats though boats though
All right
um
Some wacky wild ones dropped real quick
Uh
In the realm of the I'm so hungry. I am sweat. I'm I'm quite. Yeah
In the love you can see but my hand was shaking like this. I didn't need anything. I woke up so late to come over here
Same here. Yeah, because it's been a very busy
very very busy
set of hours my god, but hyper light drifter tv series in the works
From alex preston and castlevania's adi shankar. This needs to be three episodes and cost infinity dollars. That's the exact
thing
That it needs to be pat
That is
Exactly what it needs to be
holy shit
um
Yes
So the you're pissed that I got there before you, huh? It's so accurately exactly what it needs to be
When you're right, you're fucking right
infinity dollars
For three episodes. Let's go
man
So it's not
so
As you know, right devil may cry. Yep, uh, I mean that zelda talk happened at some point but never when we were
We didn't always the castle man came out was castlevania was good enough
So now they're really really going hard on it. Good. This is a good path but video game stuff
But the picks they're grabbing are now unpredictable. Yeah, they're this I would never have thought to see that this dragon's dog
Was getting a fucking show man. Now it is unpredictable
The fucking papers are up in the air
Who knows what can get an animation show on netflix because anything is up for grabs
Castlevania devil may cry dragon's dogma. Yeah, hyper light drifter. Go fuck yourself. You know what's next. Yeah, I don't know
Although the adi shankar. What is it the bootleg universe? Yeah, in particular is like it's mainly those but yeah, yeah
incredible
um anything with a strong enough like visual, uh, you know identity
Uh, should be up for grabs this but I would never imagine this one because it's
Such a video game. Yeah, it's such a fucking video game. Uh, did you play a hyper light drifter?
Yeah, there's a lot of weird ass mysterious shit going on there
You could do a like a quiet like samurai jack kind of thing
But you'd almost be like why not turn that into
Well, because the other game got announced and that's also very pretty. Anyway, this is exciting
And this is like this is one of those things where you just see and you go. Yeah, man
I absolutely adore hyper light drifter. I I fucking adore that game that game is amazing
But like this could have been like, oh hollow knight
Movie in the works. Yeah, you just go like teen hollow knight. What? Yeah, okay
Oh, so that was that was the fucking weird one of the week there. Um, yeah
And I mean the others aren't really that big of a deal. So that's fine
All right, we talked about that darly dagger
Yeah, I want to put out a piece of news is the enter the gunjians getting a free update this week on friday
Yeah, that will have a new a new floor new boss and a new a two new characters. Okay
Yeah, they had a nice cool booth set up
So they had this thing a long time ago where they did advanced gunjians and dragons
And then they said that they were working on
Um
One last piece of dlc that would actually be a paid expansion
And then they said, okay. Well, we actually kind of want to move off of it
So it's going to be a little smaller but be free and then like a year and a half past
And and now they're talking about this and it has like more stuff in it than advanced
gunjians and dragons
so like
fucking sick
Especially since to my tastes
Gunjian is my favorite of the roguelikes. So the problem is because I I like I dropped off before going further when I was walking by
And I was seeing cool. Shit. I wasn't sure if it was new or old and I was like, ah
You wouldn't have hit the that kind of stuff is a little subtle for roguelike stuff. So I don't blame you
Um, it's called a farewell to arms
What a great name was and it was also like a bullet shaped screen and it was it was it was cool. Anyway, uh
So, yeah, I mean
Something that I enjoy because I'm gonna push that
Is the fact that our type two our type final two announced for ps4. Cool. Um
Our type is cool. Our type is very cool and it was auto april fools, but it turns out it's super fucking real
Yeah, but it wasn't april fools in japan when it got announced, which is the dumbest part
Yeah, so if anyone out there is a fan of schmups and
You know, you're a fan of the good schmups
Then you should be a fan of our type and our type final two
Coming to ps4 and in the trailer they show you what you want to see. They show you the option type things. They show you the fucking
um
The amount of ships they show you all of it and uh, it's probably our types dope man. Yeah
I really fucking need to sit down and actually play rezzo gun. I wish uh, we could get uh another gradius though
Because I fucking love me some gradius, but you specifically want the follow-up
To now on gradius six you want gradius six not just any grade
I prefer gradius to our type and I know that's really specific
That is that is just the truth. Yeah gradius five is so strong that it takes it takes that absolutely does
But our type's nothing to slouch at no, um quite frankly the treasure games are the are your peak and then you get into the fucking
Into the weeds, but like no gradius five. But where does toho fit in? Um
In prison
Where it belongs with the rest of the anime
Heavy rain beyond two souls in detroit become human
Did you see the fucking recommend the specs on this shit pc via epic game store epic game store getting a lot of push
Did you see the destructoid like front page when this got announced the rex specs?
Did you see the fucking front page of destructoid? It was a quote from tim sweeney
Uh saying hey, we're not gonna the reason why epic doesn't have that many games on the servers
We're not gonna put bad games on our on our platform and then like three hours later this
And so they were like right next to each other in the fucking news feed was the funniest fucking thing
Is there been a single piece of positive news about the epic game store?
I can't get ready get ready for the people are so mad about the outer worlds
Get ready for the biggest one because borderlands three
They leaked out a twitter ad and that's gonna be at the epic game store and get ready for people to be
Absolutely fucking pissed off
So woolly, I don't know how familiar you are with the epic game store at all
I've never even seen it. So there's two reasons why people are pissed one
Paid exclusives on pc is like the worst thing ever
That was one of those perks that you just got to ignore as a pc gamer, right?
And the second thing is that the the epic game store is like the worst store ever
Okay, well now now hold on because we're really fighting through a world of bullshit of
Like I've had to use origin a lot recently. Okay, so I used you play
I will explain to you why and it's in a simple manner
The epic game store
Barely exists. There's no search function in the store tab
There's no shopping cart
There's no email verification when you make an account so people can steal your email out from under you without verifying it
Then why the push for exclusivity
Money woolly
They're building it later. They put out a roadmap
But like woolly they put out a roadmap and they say that they're gonna have a shopping cart within six weeks
Oh my god. Oh my god. So the store was supposed to be something else by this point in time probably no
They're just starting it up now because when you start locking in exclusives usually you
You know
Also the game spies on your processes in a way that is somewhat uncomfortable to a lot of people if your store is shit
I hope everyone yells
Loudly until they realize that you can't do that
Like at the very minimum
If you are pulling people away from the platform that that is there that they can have the news and works or whatever
And you want to go with an exclusive thing at the very minimum
Your thing should be competitive and if it is then you can go well
I can see why they want to do this. Well, it's inconvenient
But I get it. That's business. Here's here. We can't be like, hey, why isn't why isn't uh, um the fucking
PSN on the e-shop. Do you want to hear the competitive nature of this thing? Sure fortnight
What about it
fortnight
Okay, but no the thing is not the only place you're gonna. They have they would never they have hundreds of millions of people
Registered to an account system. Yes, so they go. Let's build a store around it
But fortnight is on every everything. Yes, but on the pc they have hundreds of millions of accounts registered
So then they go, well, why don't we leverage this into a store? Why don't we?
But then they have fortnight money. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Got it. Got it. Got it. Got it.
apparently
The deal for developers for this timed exclusivity
is the wildest exclusivity deal ever
which is
That uh, first of all, they only take I think it's eight percent. No 12 percent of the income rather than steams 30
Yeah
And apparently if your projections for sales
End up being way lower than what you get
They will reimburse some of that to you
If you're trying to so if you lose sales by going epic, they will reimburse you some of the cash
If you're so there's no loss. Yeah, if you're trying to fight steam, you have to do that. Yeah
But the problem is that the steam fight is it's bad. There's no offline mode
Um
I I have I have friends who had their accounts stolen due to fortnight because what do you mean?
There's no offline mode. I mean then you can't play anything offline
The store doesn't go offline. Okay, so everyone signs up for fortnight. That's infinity people. Yeah, right and they go
We have a list they're all here. What do we do?
Make some money make some money. Well, okay. Uh, no one likes it because our story is literally a web page
um
instead of
Spend a shit zillion resources to get the the fucking store up to snuff within like a day
They said the resources to get the exclusives. Let's let's spend a couple billion dollars on exclusive buying a dozen games
Lock it down. Yeah, and then that way who cares how bad it is
You're coming here for it and they actually did an interview
I think was sweeney who said like listen, we obviously can't do this forever
There's not enough money in the world to just keep buying a pc games for years
But we think we can build an install base with this
But the the the reality of it is that everybody that I know that plays a lot of buys and plays a lot of pc games is just
Is like boycotting that store out of fucking spite because they're so mad
I heard one of the funniest things this weekend about like because at the mixer mixer
I was trying to figure out I'm like, what's the deal with the mixer? Right? What's the deal with spinning mixer?
what is it and um
And there's like what's different or whatever and so there's a couple of things in particular like the whole like the partner
Threshold is way way lower
Yeah, so you and so a lot of people get in there
But then not a lot of viewers get in there
So what you end up with is a community of a bunch of
creators kind of watching each other stuff and hosting and rehosting in a perpetual creator content paradise sub for sub
But it's because sub for sub world sub for sub world sub for sub universe
But what ends up happening is there's stuff that is there like
So when you watch stuff you build you can build a currency by watching over time
Yeah, that's like like bits but it's watch currency and then those that currency can be
Spent on certain types of emotes like every time you want to do a certain type of emotes
You spend some currency to do the one
Yeah
And that watch currency when the emote is spent on your channel then it gets turned into real currency
Okay, so then the player so that's all right
So what happens is the watch currency turns into this and then that turns into an emote and that emote currency gets
sent to the creator who
You know collects whatever at the end and it's like, yeah, that's real. That's money dollars off of an engagement off of just people watching
But they add choosing to engage sure like so that's a thing that's in place
Where is that money coming from?
What's happening there is it?
like
That doesn't sound like it can last coming from microsoft
But it's like is it like okay is that if you told me you get the currency from watching an ad
Which is what bits are then it's like, okay, okay
Well, it came from the ad that it fully comes. Yeah, but if it comes from not watching an ad but just watching the
I'll tell you exactly where that fucking comes from that comes off of microsoft's belief that ad revenue will support
Uh engagement revenue and that they'll balance each other out
I'm I'm will they know of course they will confuse because ads on the internet are bullshit. Yeah
Uh
All right, well, anyway, you know, I only say that on the episode where we didn't have any sponsors this week
Um, by the way, you should all drink red bull. It's delicious
Um
You know as I was waiting in line for the bathroom it packs this weekend
Exactly exactly that noise is exactly it but I had a thought
Uh, and then I had to know what I was thinking that
Like why when I open up this door
Am I not getting my own
private instanced bathroom
You know and I'm like if we ever were to get
That real world video game tech going. Yeah one of the greatest uses of it of all time would be
bathrooms are instances
okay
I feel like
Yeah, we could probably seems like an absurd waste of a wild technology, but I and I hear you
Okay, I hear you
But think
A bathroom that you can open anywhere. Okay that no one will ever ever see
Or interact with ever
Only you can ever use it ever in your life
You know what I like to do
When there's no one at home
I like to open up the bathroom door and go to the bathroom with the bathroom door open
And be like
No one can see me
Yeah
Yeah, that that cool breeze is nice. Yeah, but I'm talking about a private instance
In real life and could we use this to create fucking uh cold fusion? Yeah, where's this going? Is this an ad read? No
No, it was just
It was just a thought I was just a thought that like I wanted I want instance tech in real life
Specifically for toilets
What do you want siri?
siri's trying to help you
Siri's confused. Let's take some emails. Hey if you want to send an email in
Oh, what if you get trapped in the instance? Well, then I guess you die
I guess I'll die then if the servers go down while you're in the bathroom
I guess that's the end of your life. I remember but it's a small price to pay
I remember when uh one me Eli and matt did the fucking um
Uh tng a first contact commentary track
There was like a full half hour about us talking about what happens to every human liquid that hits the floor in the holodeck
When they turn that shit off
I don't even like all the semen from the sex holograms
Oh
Because that's not gonna go because that's that's real. That's not photonic, right?
But it's being carried inside of the hologram. Yeah, and then what happens
Just beam it on to the I think we decided to beam it on to the deck of the Klingons
Just beam it just beam it all over if you die in the bathroom you die in real life. Yeah, that's true
Hey, if you want to if you want to send in some emails, um
Uh
To the podcast send it to castle super beast mail at gmail.com
That's castle super beast mail at gmail.com. I really should have eaten something before coming over here
Yeah, I'm really I am actually my brain is slowing down bad. I'm really really dying
Um, oh boy, make sure to get a really good email. Hey, I'm trying to but everyone's yelling about this new mortal combat 11 character
What is it? I don't know is it a cum torpedo?
What I just saw in chat the word cum torpedo. Why would you what so oh because oh, yeah, that's yeah star trek
No, but who's the who's the character set setrion? Okay, that's cool
You're gonna get a low energy coverage of the story no matter what it is set setrion set
setrion how do I do it
Set setrion who is this setrion is we're gonna take a look at what setrion is I'll look at it
This is seven minutes long. Why is it seven minutes not if I click buttons? I don't want to see this
All right
We see cabal
Yeah, we see
A terrible video player trying to I've already lost interest. Well
Yeah, but mk11 will probably be pretty cool. Yes, and the character is probably all right
Yeah, all right new announcements happening live on the show. What do you want me to win? I'm in cold sweaty. I don't like this
You ever not eat and then you get on a plane and you feel like this and then you feel like you're gonna have a panic attack on a plane
and be that guy
You ever do that? I don't I've never had that happen. I did that once on the trip to toronto with you guys
It's one of the it was it was the suspicious
trip you remember the one
Where my seat was away from you guys every single flight for some reason and I kept going suspicious
I can't find the new character. That's fine scorpion killed a person. I'm giving up. We'll talk about it next time. That's fine
Okay
um, oh shit. Yeah
I
That that pack shit. Sorry. Yeah, the devil may cry next time
um
I don't it's good
You're not here. If you get it now, you're not gonna like it. So wait
Hey spoiler for devil may cry 5 woolly's opinion woolly thinks it's cool and I'd rather wait
Also, because at least by the time I get to it next time
Like stuff will have happened in the lp. Yeah, so it makes more sense. Don't worry about it. Just organize your thoughts good
It makes more sense to do we just eat on the podcast in the future
As long as you have lunch directly at the microphone, you know, you don't want this low energy bad dmc spoiler cast
All right, I want you don't want I once aged so stop sandwiched on my stream
And there were people that were like get the mic away from your gross mouth, but there were other people that was like no, no
To to into the mic. Yeah, I know because weird ASMR shit, but I'll tell you what like people
More than once have been like
Actually when I hear those noises. Yeah, I am actually unsubscribing and leaving. Yeah, and I cannot deal
But what about the the muckbangers?
They have a category where you don't know the muckbang aficionados you can filter for it
Oh, you can okay. No one shows up here for mouth noises
Wait, I don't know. This is technically a mouth noise if you came here for the few of the food groceries
Then then sure, you know what you're getting into. I remember there was a but the ambush is the problem
I remember I was on stream once and I was like, hey if everything went tits up and I had to just
Just eat gross things on camera for money. Would you guys watch and everybody was like, yeah
If you ask any question and end it with would you watch the answer will be yeah
Yeah, but that's not true ask people if they wanted to watch pillars of eternity and they said yeah
and they lied
There's a lot of questions where you where the people were uh
Symbolically asked if they would like to watch something. Oh my god, and then they lied. What was it? What was it? Um
Uh, the it's like this seems like the kind of LP that I'd ask for and then watch a couple episodes
And then stop watching and go play it myself
I just to be real. I might I would totally stop. I would totally stop. I have no intention of watching this. I'll ask for it though
I appreciate the honesty. Yeah, I do. All right. We got one coming in
Uh
This one comes in from julie and he says trailer just went up this morning for persona the live action netflix series
Not related to the game, but it made me think about how perfect the persona universe would be for live action teenager drama show
You ever think about it. You ever had your hopes crushed by a trailer you thought was going to be something else? No
That being said go watch the fucking
Japanese stage dramas. They're awful
You do have that alternative
They're awful. Uh
God there's at least one tv show reboot that shares a name. No, there's a new that shares a name with a video game and I didn't know
what it was
What what what am I thinking? No, I got one. Yes. X like here we go. I remember on the tv guide channel
Seeing no, what was it?
No, that's not true. You haven't said a single noun
I'm trying to remember something and I'm trying and I don't remember what the series was but there was something that used to air
I've given literally no details
I know but it was one of those things because you know like there's like ghost writer the comic and ghost writer
Yeah, right
It was one of those things where it was like a really close name
From a really cool thing that I liked and then a thing that was terrible
Still literally nothing. I don't remember told to anyone. I don't remember
I thought I had an answer and I did they're like
I had no answer
Total lack of nouns. I thought
pokemon
Was related to monsters in my pocket shut up
because
The first first time I ever saw that I'm like, oh, you guys are just like rebranding your
Like not rebranding, but you're doing like a it's like, yeah monsters in my pocket pocket monsters
Pokemon is short for pocket monsters. I was like, right monsters in my pocket. All right
Same toy same same thing, right? What's the difference? And they're like, no, but a lot these Japanese things and I was like, yeah, but I
I remember those toys. Yeah, so that happened
Let's get a good email
James says dear thrash man and trash man. I heard about an April Fool's joke
Uh, where a game pro would do fake game reviews once they made up a parody of capcom versus snk called capcom versus snl
If it actually existed, who would be the strongest snl fighter? Chris Farley. Chris Farley
One true answer. Yeah, he'd be like the Shao Kahn. Well lord michaels is the Shao Kahn
That's not debatable. That is fact. However, Chris Farley would be the topist here. Okay, so he'd be like in tarot
He'd be really high up there. Okay. Um, yeah, definitely Chris Farley. Chris Farley would be way the fuck up way the fuck up there
Yeah, yeah
for sure
Norm MacDonald, I was just thinking a norm a norm norm would be like would he be the like the Shang Tsung?
Norm MacDonald would be like they'd be amongst the the Shinteno, you know what I mean?
The fucking the four heavenly kings, you know, you'd get your Norman there. You get your Colin Quinn in there. Yeah
like uh, uh, uh, I want to say that um, I'll see bill hater as Kung Lao Horatio Sons and uh
Horatio Sons and uh fucking and Jimmy Fallon as ferritor
All right
You know, you know Tina Fey's doing her thing. Yeah, she'd be Sonya. Yeah
But Chris Farley unstoppable. Yeah, and like yeah sandler, of course is can't be top counts sandlers in there because you know
Anyone who got a fucking multi-billion dollar career out of yeah, you know
SNL was like sandler would be striker
Like Chris Rock is in there
Chris Rock is jacks really? Yeah, that's weird
Steve Martin's in there. Steve Martin is
Who Dana Carvey's in there? Okay
Old comedians are I think the meanest joke I've ever seen directed at any comedian is people who ask Steve Martin
No, wait, am I thinking to write Steve Martin?
Old white guy with white hair guy. Okay. Yeah, they ask Steve Martin. Hey Steve. Why aren't you funny anymore?
and like
It's it's the one they all like it's the one that always hits him and it's like fucking ouch because it's he's not
But still like ah, he plays the ukulele
Uh
Yeah, and then also lonely islands. Yeah
They'd be uh
Triborg. Yeah, they'd be tri-borg. Absolutely. Okay, and uh fucking fucking um sandberg would be sub-zero, right?
And um yorma and akiva norma would be fucking
Syrax and akiva would be
Fucking sector. No yorma would be sector and akiva would be syrax
for sure
This is akiva goldman, right?
And syrax is yellow sure and also yorma was the scary one in that one rap
And red is anger and who invited that guy that guys are cut. Yeah, there you go. See
What up crushing salty?
Blazinski's cask. Yeah
You know see I got him again. Yeah, I got him again. This was so badly written
But you tried cliff stay losing. Hey, uh had some info on regarding migraines because I'm catching up
I listened to csb-08 mom suffered from oral migraines like pats mom and I couldn't get them properly treated
Cracked and tried something based on acupuncture. Yeah a day of piercing now this I literally heard this weekend
Because a friend of mine has a piercing right on the day a day of piercing. It's like right
Around the ear area. Yeah, and some people like
Uh, like fucking swear by the fact that it makes like yeah the pressure go away. There's a word for that
It's called claim. Yes. Yes. This is a claim. What's the uh, what's the the other word does pseudosciences and
In crystals and whatnot
But anyway, the photo attach shows a picture of what it looks like
Piercing a bunch of nerves quite a few people have these migraines said pinching this area helps relieve the pain
So some people said fuck it and punched a hole in that bitch
His mom my mom in particular has had little to no migraine since she's pierced it
So I guess it works at least sometimes listen either that or it's one hell of a placebo placebo is
So much more powerful than you think it is that's that's the thing where people say it's not just a placebo
It's got this really powerful effect like placebo's can do crazy. Yeah, you yeah, if you say it's not just a placebo
It's like no, but placebo works. You have no idea how strong placebo's could be. Yeah
Like it's one of the you want to talk fucking pseudoscience magical bullshit. Yeah placebo
Fuck science up bad
Which is why control groups have to exist because it makes belief equal power. Yes spiral energy is a real thing
Yeah, that's why praying over people sometimes nets different results. Yeah, it actually no it's praying people kills them
Praying for people kills them. No, that's not that's not what I heard. Oh, yeah
They ran a thing was fucking I think it was stanford where they ran fucking all sorts of control groups of people going in for heart surgery
And they had a local parish
Pray for them and they had three tech
They had three groups people that didn't get prayed for people that did get prayed for
But we're not told that they were being bad or they're the people that got prayed for and were told
And the people who were told that they were prayed for suffered more complications and more early deaths as the result of their heart transplants
Because the the the idea they came out from it afterwards was that being told that you had a whole parish praying for you
Made people freak out and think they were gonna die
Which caused them to die that doesn't know what do you mean?
Like why would they have that thought as opposed to I have a bunch of people that are trying to give me well
Because people are cynical
Well, are these wait hold on are these people that were told that that were believers in no
But they're saying hey, we're trying out a new science thing. We're gonna have a whole people pray for your operation
Okay, and which makes the operation seem really bad and scary. Okay, and the people they did it on were blind as well
Yeah, and they and them having faith was not a part of the no, absolutely not
I'd be curious to see that aspect of it. Yeah, because if we're trying to talk about the placebo effect
Yeah, people that believe in the belief would that would probably help that out
That's what but that's what I heard then that's what I'm talking about. It's like what if but what if it didn't
I was and it might be fucking anecdotal
But I was given like an explanation about that where people that believed in what they were having happened to them with the
Perth thing. Yeah, it had they admitted different results based on your placebo of believing
Hey, here's what you do. Here's what you do. All right. Here's how you test it, right? You know that guy
Not not really all that religious, but you think he's a prick
Goes to the hospital. Tell him you're praying for him
That'll show him
You know, I mean based on like the old fucking like with my old family and
And and a lot of the church people and whatnot like that's one of the biggest
Isn't that like a passive aggressive all seist like burns. Isn't that like a passive aggressive like back back hand?
It is like it is. I'll pray for you. Oh, yeah. It is the poison knife
As you well while you shake the hand
absolutely
Uh that is straight up just you know, and you you say it in the way
That's like the most the more endearing you say it
The worse it is the more real it is because you're just like you need it that much
You need it so bad because you're so it's such a you know, godless piece of shit. I'm so high above you. Oh, man
I'm up here
And you know what? Yeah while I'm up here. I'll do my best. I'll try and reach down my hand for you
I'll bring you up. I'll bring you up. You lowly garbage get on my level. Fuck off
Uh, yeah, so piercings and then um
He also talked about get to the orange door and whatnot. Oh, yeah for the people that are asking if I've got to play mech
Um hardcore mecha. I didn't because I missed the booth. I didn't see the booth all weekend
I was looking around and I completely didn't find it. So that happened
um
They're not gonna hear this
And uh question uh time you figured it out by you were wrong
They're super beastie boys the time you bought you figured out a mechanic and a piece of lore or a secret only the game
Only for the game to tell you you were wrong
When I played mgs 5 the fighting uh and fighting. Oh, I'm so tired. I'm sorry
Let's try this again. It's really bad
Example when playing mgs 5 and fighting the burning men
I thought all I had figured out and air dropped the water pistol to aid in beating him
He absorbs and reflects all attacks
Since he absorbs and reflects all attacks when I shot him a couple times miller said over the radio
That it's not going to work and my heart was broken
That sucks
The game's bad
That should have won
I think we also tried that in the lp. I can't remember though
And will it uh I was gonna say there's definitely time
When you're like well the game logic says that this should probably work here
Or plot logic says it should probably work here, but the game's like, you know, it doesn't and willy. Yes
People want to see more willy where'd they go? All right willy versus hit it out on youtube and twitch. Wow. We're so done
Hey, if you want to see more of me freak out that I think people put their dicks on things in my vicinity
Or have oh man willy I had like the most ocd meltdown playing shovel knight yesterday
How's that I I because I kept dying to bosses because I refused to use sub weapons. Okay, because I might need them later
Sub weapons consumables. Yeah
But the ones you get the magic for in every screen just fucking use. No, you don't understand
How did you make the brain goblins? How did you get through castlevania? Oh castlevania is fine because you hit any item you get a heart
Anyway, you can check me out at angriest pat on twitch, uh and on uh on twitter and uh pat stairs at on youtube
But uh, it should be easy to find i'm streaming, uh
Eight o'clock p.m. Wednesday thursday friday. It's gonna be all roguelikes this week. Yeah roguelikes
In the celebration of gunjan
All right now i'm finally back from packs. Yeah
We're done. I know I got to do the samurai shodan video
Yeah, you do and we got to do the we got to do the the the video where we talk about the podcast
I'll just start it right now. Okay, you know what? Let's start right now. Hold on
Okay
Okay, uh, is this on photo. It's on photo. How do I put on video video?
Video they won't know that it's happening live. Okay. Hold on. They won't know it'll take hours before anyone even realizes
Okay, it's on now. I turned it on
What's up with the podcast? Uh, it's out. You should check it out. This is the podcast. You should check it out
I it's out. Okay. Now's the time to check it out
Did you get it? Yeah, I got it the video's done
They will never know they'll never know that the podcast preview was recorded
In the actual podcast really because we're sitting in the spots at the thing
But by the time they find out it'll be too late
really
Will it
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
Oh
That's it
You