Castle Super Beast - CSB 015: Your Crunch-Baby is sealed behind a Metacritic Score Cage

Episode Date: April 30, 2019

Download for Mobile | Podcast Preview | Full Timestamps Avengers Endgame Spoilercast at the end, Spoiler culture and movie bouncer discussion up top. Reset the Clock. You can watch us record the p...odcast live on twitch.tv/castlesuperbeast Outro: Lonely Rolling Star - Big Band Jazz Version (The 8-Bit Big Band) Persona 5 Royal launches October 31 in Japan, 2020 in the west; first details, trailer, and screenshots Omega Force-developed action RPG Persona 5 Scramble: The Phantom Strikers announced for PS4, Switch Respawn Delays Titanfall Plans To Focus On Apex Legends Kingdom Hearts III DLC ‘Re:Mind’ announced Vampire: The Masquerade – Bloodlines 2 details Thinblood clan PS5 first details: ray-tracing, solid-state drive, backwards compatible with PS4, more Sony Will Not Launch The Next-Gen PlayStation Over The Next 12 Months Overwatch’s New Workshop Feature Now Live On PTR For Making Customized Game Modes Falco, Peppy, And Slippy Join Fox In The Starlink: Battle For Atlas On April 30, 2019

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Starting point is 00:00:00 See ya next time Endgame spoiler cast at the end of this episode No game of thrones spoilers because it's still mid-season I I thought it was in really poor taste how Ned came back to life to crawl up Thanos's ass, right? So Maybe at the end of Of the season but I can just give feelings I could just throw feelings out there I have many feelings about game of thrones right now actually. Oh, yeah, let's talk about the concept of spoilers
Starting point is 00:01:10 Shall we? So the the end game came out on fucking God I want to say Tuesday of last week like movies are getting earlier and earlier and the entire internet was a buzz Hey, shut the fuck up Hey, you Shut your fucking mouth Don't spoil don't spoil this adaptation of a old comic Don't shut your shut your fucking mouth to end game. It was different
Starting point is 00:01:37 The only thing that Matt will of course, but the only thing that matters is whether or not Paul Rudd is gonna climb into Josh Brolin's asshole 22 movies, right? Everyone shut their fucking mouth and to be fair most people were pretty good about it, right? Meanwhile Just a few days later Let's hashtag the shit out of every single fucking moment that happened during a live TV broadcast Oh, yeah, let's change our fucking avatars to a bunch of spoilers and flood Twitter with fucking Animated gifts of all sorts of fucking bullshit
Starting point is 00:02:15 Let's have the fucking hashtag of the fight at the location Be like you stupid mother fucking idiots. Oh My god the the cat. Oh and that week was the Jojo week as well where Fuck the people watching the anime if they didn't watch it that morning. Holy shit. Oh My god, this was my favorite part because of this thing Well end of fucking epic what the fuck is what is the difference between TV and movies? Why is like one spoiler thing so rigidly enforced and everyone's shit the fuck you shit the fuck But as soon as it becomes like live TV or pseudo live TV
Starting point is 00:03:03 Everyone's just like Twitter is a live place for a content reaction It's like oh my fucking god the difference between Avengers and Game of Thrones and Jojo was that Avengers Officially went on an anti-spoiler campaign and they made trailers and videos and hashtags Specifically telling I seriously doubt that would have mattered that was a part of it and that was a big group That was definitely one difference between how things played out. It doesn't change anything ultimately and you know in one case You're looking at Like anyone who's already read part five can spoil anything about it for you in a second So that's that's in that's in and has always been in dangerous territory
Starting point is 00:03:46 The mangan people are like this is 20 years old So like what I'm saying is that has been like in the public safety like sphere For the entire life. I've been anime has been exist has been out I've been under the the Idealized rule set that like you get a spoiler reset when a new adaptation comes out of whatever your personal length of time is I'm just saying that like it's been up to like assholes or not assholes Yeah, for Jojo of the entire time I'm just like the entire at the entire parts have been out during that anime run now with
Starting point is 00:04:21 Game of Thrones they caught up to the book and went past it so you couldn't possibly It's fresh for everybody And what do you there's not much to say besides like people freak out and have their Reactions the things and I like it's you know and like the fan like if anything if anything All you really had to go on was the fact that every episode when it happened like the Sunday of you would always see Twitter become nothing But those hashtags I just realized what the actual difference is and the actual difference is is you're not supposed to be on your phone in a movie theater Oh Yeah, there's that and it and the the part of it the distance between like
Starting point is 00:05:05 Something happening and going but that's not God on that's not the entirety of it That's a really minor aspect of it But it's really yeah, that's a part of it But look at but like all the articles and the Twitter official moments that get created and the little icon at the end of the hashtag To show you that it's an official thing That's all reflective of stuff that happens in the 10 to 10 minutes after 11 o'clock to an hour, you know, so from from 11 11 from 11 10 till 12 is you know, that's the that's the catch-up hour
Starting point is 00:05:36 So I have a practicality question here that met that is gonna amplify or or Like de-amplify my my personal feelings on this the way that Game of Thrones comes out It's airing on what HBO whatever HBO Sundays, and if you're in Canada crave, I believe okay Is that 11 p.m. East Coast and then 11 p.m. Central and then 11 p.m. Pacific? So it all depends because I mean look for that's been a problem for the entire run Like for years when it was unavailable anywhere else except for the HBO in Canada was like just not loud There was a whole thing where the earliest you could possibly get it was I want to say Sweden
Starting point is 00:06:19 Some country got it an hour before everybody else did and though that would be the country who got ripped You know and shoved online on a torrent. So Yeah, it like the idea that I think you're spoiling a thing like before it's even actually live in parts of the world is No, no, no, no, no what I was talking about is after it aired Yeah for North America that 11 to 12 hours when it is after it airs for North America, but There is that one-hour head start if you happen to like, you know Live wherever that was and then everyone else watches it at 10 o'clock, you know and
Starting point is 00:06:59 Yeah, it's just the practice has been as soon as the season starts and it becomes Sunday And it's 10 o'clock after the that hour goes by the it's not just people reacting live It's like websites are writing their reviews there. There were there was somebody Page was going through a Twitter and saw somebody change their profile pic to a spoiler and their name to X character is X forever And it's just like what why? Why are you people like who would? God, yeah, I didn't see it which is fine because there's the other thing like here's another thing, right? And this is also important if you think about like official
Starting point is 00:07:40 Expectation of how you consume the give a media Avengers is something you pay to go see at a given block of time that you choose when you have that block of time Game of Thrones is something that traditionally Heirs on the TV. Yeah at the time frame that everybody watches sure grandpa exactly Right, but it's not put out It's not sure old people living in the past But that but but the difference the reason why I'm saying this is because you can feel the difference between the way people treat This versus a season of something that drops on Netflix, right? So
Starting point is 00:08:15 back when Back when it was okay to watch House of Cards Whatever back what a house of cards for example would drop a whole season in one shot there would be a It's a weird spoiler culture on there But it's a whole season and it's in one shot and you're not gonna get to through all of it in one night So anyone who was kind of like immediately posting Final episode shit about that you just go to the final episode just to fuck with you Couldn't possibly have watched all of it the time frame between the drop and where you're posting doesn't make sense
Starting point is 00:08:49 It's like when you put up a YouTube video and like a comment within six minutes is like I can't believe they never it's like the video Was 48 minutes long You don't know that and you're wrong exactly right like when someone makes a call out that said that's like it's like it's it's 915 and you have half an hour left and you couldn't have possibly seen where this goes, but So when a season drops on Netflix you don't get the thing you're talking about because there's no live time Right Game of Thrones still has a live time and it's still aired at a specific point where everybody watches it at the same time So because of that unifying factor, there's a specific moment where people are going to react to it I just like it's because it's still traditional TV. It's not often when you want on demand
Starting point is 00:09:35 The it is but it's but on demand is like almost like the secondary I've always been baffled at the movie versus Fucking TV distinction where I'll even see people go Don't spoil the movie for me and then spoil a TV show like the next day Within 24 hours of its airing. Oh, yeah, and it's like. Oh, yeah. Hey man Our podcast has done that Unintentionally at times and has been shitty about it like it is I mean besides reaction culture, right? For sure being a part of the way things go nowadays
Starting point is 00:10:12 It it's just I really do think a lot of it could go get chalked up to Are you supposed to watch this on your own time at some given point? Okay? Then you have a window You have a window of like hey everyone don't be too shitty about like for a movie The window is incredibly clear and it's your window is until the end of the movie leaves theaters Eventually it'll be gone that that time period between it leaves theaters and it hits DVD or whatever I guess you didn't care. So fuck yourself. Yeah, except for this one, which isn't leaving anytime soon No, just like what happened with those Lord of the Rings movies and shit fucking cracking billions on this
Starting point is 00:10:49 Yeah, you know, but what else to be expected to be like this is one of those moments of like I bet you everyone Involved is almost looking at these insane gangbusters numbers. I'm using that wrongly again. Whatever. They're looking at these insane huge numbers gangbusters and they are Basically going yeah as expected. Yeah This is what it should be. Yeah, anything less would have been a failure. Mm-hmm Like yeah, I bet you they had they had multiple Like goal points goalposts and I bet you there was a possibility that they could be number one and still be a fail Yeah, yeah by not hitting number one hard enough and like I could just think of a boardroom over with DC
Starting point is 00:11:33 Go on. Oh, why didn't didn't just asleep do those numbers? Oh? Oh, I guess people hate Superman. I guess that's the reason Mmm, and I bet the people over there at the dark trilogy their dark universe Whoever the fuck that even is Going oh we couldn't that could have been us The more every time I walk out and hit the credits on an MCU like Usually Steph and I have a nice big discussion about whatever references she might have missed based on comic things Yeah, and like little hidden bits and pieces where it's just like here's this was this and it's like oh cool whatever and it always
Starting point is 00:12:13 always inevitably goes back to the ultimate I told you so and how stupid everyone was in the early days of comic book movies and It like I don't mean for it to always go back there, but it's just it's so hard to avoid a story What are you talking about? Well? I'm just talking about how like I will always go back to the how in how stupid everyone involved was like Marvel was stupid for trying to sell
Starting point is 00:12:42 Every one of their properties It is up there to my knowledge with like one of the biggest entertainment blunders ever It's it is the it is number one. I can't think of anything It's actually no it is number one like you literally sold the golden goose and you could have and it would have been worse Like I had to buy back most of the right the fact that they that Marvel gave Spider-man away for whatever seven million or whatever fucking, you know Be measly measly offering And then gave them the rights to keep it in perpetuity as long as they kept using it on a time limit
Starting point is 00:13:18 Right and then said if they didn't want it, they would just stop making it It's like what fucking studio would stop making a thing and then just you know what I mean like fantastic Rather make out made that is like the worst piece of shit ever that God made in two parts Just to keep the fucking just to keep it never even released if I remember right why I was like, why would you expect anyway? So the level at which Marvel was like Unconfident in their own like property and the how much they thought movies were worthless and slash They couldn't do anything with them the ability like the amount of like just underestimating your own value Yeah, right and and it is unbelievable and then the fact that like these studios came in and like saw a crazy-ass deal
Starting point is 00:14:02 Sony rejected every other character because quote-unquote no one gives a shit about anyone besides spider-man Right like the out-of-touchness With everyone involved of that of that era blows my mind and I keep going back to it because it's like that was the exact time And Fox as well They got X-Men and then you know they they did what they could but like even when you're tanking with it And you're not because you don't know how to make a good movie yet because you don't know what it is to get Like solid staff. You don't know who the solid writers are. You don't know who the people aren't it's like Secret hey, why don't you go find the people that wrote the comics like it?
Starting point is 00:14:38 So it just it it really really like there's a there's something inside me that always goes like Man, I'm I'm just Vex at how dumb you all were because Like I guess I just got lucky happened and I happened to be a kid that was reading comics early on at the time when this was going on and Could have easily pointed and said yeah the ultimates. That's a really good You should look at that as a like that in fact it was actually designed to be cinematic Mark Miller wrote that and he got Sam Jackson and it's it's literally like Presented in a cinema a cinematic way. Yeah waiting for adaptation for you Just just do camera cuts on these panels do it the writing is solid and the pacing is solid and everything about this is done
Starting point is 00:15:25 Really well and all you really need to do is just give it a chance Yeah, you know if you happen to pick it up open it and give it a chance and No one involved with any of the decision-making the money or whatever Really because they're all 85 year old dudes that remember fucking talkies in shit go on all these Coolies max wrong woolly wrong crazy talk. Okay. I don't I didn't read I don't care about ultimates volume 3 and beyond Ultimates ultimates 1 and ultimates 2 I think those were great reads. I like I enjoyed those. I don't give a shit what you say the fact that In general, there were all these great runs that we've had
Starting point is 00:16:12 Early on in this in this life cycle, you know, and it just it got so underestimated and what and eventually The and here's the thing too. It's like you got to see the lifetime where So because people didn't give a shit about it, you got some bad movies out of it Because no one's giving a shit. Yeah, and and by no one I mean like the the Hollywood People that I saw Daredevil and then the bad movies come out and then the self-fulfilling prophecy Starts to really bad people hate comic people hate superheroes Well, maybe it's cuz like these are like video game movies Basically, yeah video game movies never broke out and you're looking at and you're looking at Marvel on the
Starting point is 00:16:57 At the point where they were like fucking running out of money, you know, and they were bankrupt they were getting desperate they weren't bankrupt, but they were getting there, right and You just and you just kind of like I'm sitting here and Like other people I know that I've like also read like good comics that are like a fan of these things have just are just like We know like there's good stories If you took these stories and showed them to people they would like them because they're good Yeah, you just you just have to show them the good
Starting point is 00:17:28 Don't make up your own bad one and put the name on it just to go. Hey look, you know the name cool They'll come sit and watch a bad thing and so like I have I have like a Additional like side thing of that which is I'm sure someone in a fucking Studio at one point said Comic book shit is too weird for the average movie going audience They like westerns and dramas and rock etc, right? but then I think Like do you remember that Hollywood put out a fucking movie called Zardaws
Starting point is 00:18:04 Yeah, do you remember shit like that? Yeah, okay? And at the same time I'm reminded that was actually a relatively recent quote from somebody over at fucking DC movies about Wonder Woman before after fucking Superman came out said Wonder Woman's too weird for the movie going audiences and not only did that turn out to be Way untrue and isn't that like the most successful of the DC ones before Sam Wonder Woman? Yeah, it was because it was the kid was the good one That was the same week that the fucking Guardians trailer dropped and everybody found out about Rocket Raccoon Was it talk about oh, this is too weird for the movie going on yeah
Starting point is 00:18:53 Um, I also fucking space raccoon and trust me and I get it that I see you chat Heinz 2020 it's easy to say that in retrospect But I'm telling you that I in the moment that these like in the moment that the shit was happening 10 years ago. I like even 15 even before we got like the Avengers build-up moment of the first Avengers movie when it was just the Individual movies coming together like I was still really upset about just about this whole thing because I'm like This is there's a basically a problem that existed where comic books as a medium have been out for forever They've been they're quite old at this. They're old and they've been goofy dumb Cape shit as people say yeah for a long time and
Starting point is 00:19:39 the good ones have been far and few in between and then eventually got more and more like frequent but The the the thought process of everyone involved with these business deals was old style Comic books are dumb kid things who's who can who the fuck cares? They were not even aware of the fact that like there were good things being done There were not there like I bet you they didn't know about Sandman existing at all You know and the fact that you'd look at it and go like the same writer that wrote These really successful good books also wrote a comic and guess what writing is writing
Starting point is 00:20:16 So if you give it a chance it can it can work what now that's So Anyway, it really was just one of those things were like if it felt like you could just if you felt like there's nothing You could do to let people know it's almost like how we when we like we play games and we kind of are like we're big fans of this particular Genre we know exactly like oh man Just do the thing that we've seen you know this one and this one and this one and also this one and you made the best game Because we know yeah, you're sitting here. We're aware. It's like and like and like there's no they're just too far The distance is too great. They just don't know and they're like that should we try this? No. Oh god
Starting point is 00:20:55 What do we do? So it's it's and like thank fucking God, right? You got like they they they eventually got people on board like Joss Whedon and such to just kind of come in and go like Okay, Corral this fucking thing and then eventually the Russo's wrangle it up. Just exactly You know and whatnot and then they're like, okay. Yeah, so we know how to get people involved that like worked on The like like like this shit before who's who've done good writing for it We know how to get people involved that know how to fucking write scenes right great great dialogue and whatnot and not just like grab whoever would be coming down the Hollywood production studio like like Fucking production line where they're like up-and-coming director
Starting point is 00:21:37 Sure grab that person grab this producer over here like you know what I mean like because there's there's a factory to it so and that's that's where I want to cut in for a second because Everything that you're saying is right, but back seating in industry, but arm-chairing. It's not all back seating. It's called arm-chairing Everything you're saying is right, but no one actually learned their lesson see Marvel and the MCU I can I can feel how angry people are with We're talking about comic books. Yeah, we're talking about I'm just trying to convey that I'm just trying to convey that now that this shit is the biggest thing ever. That's cool. I'm glad we got here We almost didn't and I'm really annoyed that back when I knew like back when things were things were always
Starting point is 00:22:24 The potential for it thinks to be as good as they are. Yeah was always there I always think that the most direct comparison is how stupid the idea is that comic book stories are too dumb and too for kids or Whatever to make a good successful movie when Star Wars came out in the fucking 70s and blew the fucking top off the earth in terms of success Mm-hmm, and that's a that's a fucking comment like that's a comic book story It's a bunch of fucking magic wizards with lightning sword, but more than anything. It was space. Yeah, right and that was So the everything not hindsight it's literally what I've been yelling from the first It's not hindsight if he's been saying it for 10 years before
Starting point is 00:23:06 Before you knew who I was I've been yelling about this So here's the thing right you're right and nobody ever learned that lesson and that's the most depressing thing Because what it actually happened is that rainy made spider-man one and then Fox made X-Men one and those were really successful And then instead of learning any of the lessons that you just said except for Marvel when they got their rights back It became oh man, dude There's a lot of comic book IPs mm-hmm We ran out of ideas for real movies and then we ran out of
Starting point is 00:23:39 Any of those Tolkien books now they're done Oh cool They went back into the Hobbit right and then they started to do the comic books and now that's not it You can't even do those fast enough because all the studios grabbed up the big ones So now they're going through every fucking young adult fucking novel series Maze Runner and fucking Hunger Games and my favorite is the headline that I saw alongside the Avengers shit Which is apparently Tom Holland and Daisy Ridley big superstar spider-man and Ray Starring in a young adult novel adaptation apparently called Chaos Walking that has been deemed
Starting point is 00:24:20 Unreleasable by the studio, okay after $100 million of filming and needs to have like half of the movie reshot Because it's like the worst thing ever made. Oh man. Yeah Because who cares how much money you throw in the toilet It's not based on one of them dumb kids books like the Twilight or the Hunger Games It's this is it similar enough. Is there is there a death game aspect with a bunch of kids and I don't I have no I'm zero idea what that shit is Wow Zero unreleasable. That's that's the quote from the exactly
Starting point is 00:24:58 Can't get that out Yeah, I mean look there's there's a million issues that that you know one can go on about and like I think we've touched on it a couple of times, but the like self-perpetuating problem of how You can only have 30 names in Hollywood that actually draw people to movies at a time or so and The idea of like just getting new people as And like as much as I used to shout that the realization that no they don't want to get new people Not only can you not get new people if a person's old and good enough they get to stay around for like 40 years I mean, what was that right?
Starting point is 00:25:40 There will be a big action movie that casts fucking Will Smith as a 25 year old. Yeah, three or four years from now Yeah, the trailer just came out. Yeah, wait. Seriously. Yes. What movie am I talking about? Are you dead? Are you joking? No? They just released a trailer for a Will Smith movie where he fights himself But he fights himself from his Fresh Prince days, so it's current old grizzled bearded. Well Smith versus young Flat top will Smith and he's digitally edited to look like he did circa will Philadelphia and I'm gonna count this not as a stupid moment, but as a win for my point Like if you're a big enough in Hollywood you get to stick around forever no matter how stupid it is Literally, they made a trailer for that and it's will Smith versus young will Smith. What is fuck?
Starting point is 00:26:32 Gemini man. Sure. All right, the Mega Man boss. Okay Yeah, so The point remains that like that the only things with brass balls and or a name that matters more than the Characters like Star Wars can choose to be like yay. We're getting new people We don't want you to come in with expectations of what they are who they are based on whatever I still remember tried it with the prequels. That was a bad idea I still remember the day that I was like Chris Evans is gonna be Captain America. Really? Yeah, that weirdo from Scott Pilgrim. He looks like a dumbass
Starting point is 00:27:10 While we're on the subject matter. I want to shout out. There's a video That basically breaks down but there's different people breaking down video. I say it's we're breaking down their favorite MCU scenes And one in particular One marvelous moment and the one about the after-party. Yeah, that's my favorite is Fucking amazing. Yeah, and in that it breaks down why the the party at the after-party scene in Age of Ultron where everyone is trying to lift Thor's hammer is probably the best MCU scene. Yep. I would yeah That's a really it's amazing and shame. It's stuck in that movie. It's it's really really really strong Um
Starting point is 00:27:48 And but but the other thing that the video points out is that? The casting director and I forgot her name. Yeah, but she I was telling this exact story to somebody else Over this past week and had the same thing happen. She deserves She deserves this name. We couldn't bother. Unfortunately forgot. Yeah, but the casting director behind all the MCU movies Deserves a ton of credit because she did a fucking phenomenal job your thumbs up to you ma'am The the biggest and brightest example being Bruce Banner. Yeah, because we tried and failed twice Yeah, and then like nailed it Fucking out of the party that second one especially stings me because I remember like me and like many other people go
Starting point is 00:28:35 Man, I should just get Edward Norton and sure enough They got Edward Norton and then I went to see the movie. I'm like, they shouldn't have got Edward Norton I was wrong. I didn't see that's not how I walked out of it. I walked out of it going like Better than Eric Banner Yeah, you know and like no Idea how much fucking Ruffalo. Yeah, mr. Mr. Buffalo ruffles would do so Jobber as that finding and finding a different line entirely, you know And in general though, that was also pre fun
Starting point is 00:29:10 because like There was a moment where even the MCU even when it started like putting this plant together They didn't realize how important fun was yes, right? There was still a moment where like the cool action and the and the the fun tech and and and CG were like what they would build towards and they didn't invert the formula until I don't know where the first point was Robert Downey did a good job for being just charismatic Yeah, time through but like though they slowly got to realize that no It's the jokes in between the action that everyone wants to see it's characters
Starting point is 00:29:47 Just kind of hanging out having fun into moments And the thing about that is Joss Whedon is really fucking good at that Mm-hmm, right all of his shows are really about that They're about the characters hanging out and having fun conversations in between the action See a Shazam. I didn't so Shazam is that Like that's the whole movie. Okay, and Dumb Billy that's and that's really what I really Which is like comic book movies are are silly
Starting point is 00:30:17 Yeah, it's a silly thing to dress up in a costume and fight evil aliens. Yeah so you should play into the fact that it's silly and It's silliness is fun. Yes. It's it makes you smile And it's just that simple and the revelation that like this is how you can make people enjoy these wacky insane Settings and premises is how Guardians worked. It's the only reason Guardians could possibly work. Hey, look That that tree that can barely speak played by the excellent Vendeezel is
Starting point is 00:30:57 the most popular character or the simple fact that the way everyone that Everyone that like did not know about them prior Felt seeing that trailer for the first time is how the rest of the world in the movie feels Yes, about that team What literally who the fuck are you? It was great Anyway, so yeah, we can talk about endgame after we get through the rest of the podcast
Starting point is 00:31:28 I would like to say one Thing about endgame, which is something that I saw Jim talking about Jim Sterling Which is my overall feeling and not quality wise That is a movie that was scientifically engineered to give you the most fan service per minute of anything that has ever existed And it had to because it was the finale of a 22 movie from a from a like Arguably 23 screenwriting or like whatever perspective. It is fascinating. It had to yeah It is it is like a fucking Rubik's Cube. Oh, you can see and service. Oh, you can see the beakers boiling Oh, yeah from scene to scene no question
Starting point is 00:32:11 It it it it what it but I got that same feeling playing Metal Gear Solid 4. Yes You know devil may cry 5 and devil may cry 5. That's probably the yeah It's same thing. Remember when you're playing devil may cry 5. Oh, man. It'd be cool if they all they did and Reading steel ball run. Yeah, I'm not familiar with that. Yeah parents car cowboys The yeah, so we'll get into endgame later on game of thrones. I were still midseason But I'll stay vague on it. I'm on the outside enough to say that There is a review that is up on game spot
Starting point is 00:32:54 about that episode episode 3 of season of the final season and I think that perfectly captures a lot of my feelings in particular There was a whole lot of action. There was a lot of pretty but there was also a lot of dark and Cinematography would range between this is terrible to this is really pretty But I have major gripes and I was massively disappointed with the episode as it went on and
Starting point is 00:33:29 I'm one of the people that is hugely bummed out at the moment, but still waiting to see where the rest of the season goes So I don't even know how to respond to this because I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah, no Yeah, I know and that's fine, but I'm speaking to those who know Yeah, I know, but I have to respond at some points of the conversation. Yeah, I think I think Until we I don't want to I don't want to jump the fucking Got on this and you know because it's not done yet. I really I really believe in waiting till the till it's done, right? Remember that Like anyway, whatever I'm eagerly awaiting. So you said it's the final season now. It's the final season
Starting point is 00:34:09 It's final season and we're in the middle of the final season and And Yeah, based on unless things change, I think they made a huge misstep I feel like the actual events in Game of Thrones are less interesting then the news article we're gonna read in 18 months on this podcast
Starting point is 00:34:35 Which is George R. R. Martin is at a convention and when somebody asks him Hey, what's the next book coming out? He says Just just watch the fucking show instead. Yeah, and then he is violently torn limb from limb from the crowd attendees I I almost I one of my first thoughts one of my first thoughts last night was We know George is overseeing This whole season right apparently he's on the set or was on the set while they're filming. I was around the whole time Um Grum as he's become that's all right, and it Lee come. Yes, Grum. So Grum
Starting point is 00:35:17 Might just be Watching this play out in a full metal alchemist type way where I'm not gonna do that one But I am gonna do that part but like but like literally the maybe the reason why we haven't gotten those in the next book is because he's Waiting to see how people react to this shit and then he's gonna swerve as hard as possible away from it depending on reactions Oh, man, you know, so if he sees it and it goes, ooh Yikes, he's just gonna go and drop that entire manuscript in the trash and go not that way and Use this as a test audience. Maybe you know, and then he gets to in the future. Go. Yeah, I don't know about that shit That was terrible. I yeah, my shit's the real thing and always was and pull a witcher
Starting point is 00:35:59 You know, it's I mean about that situation you fucking galaxy brain, dude like It's it's it's so use use the show to make your book series better by Capitalizing I kind of expect for him to not even bother I genuinely do think that he that that those books are not No, man HBO show it's just early access, bro. It's just early access. Oh, yeah And every early access game has come out into full release, huh? So there haven't been any patches in a while man
Starting point is 00:36:37 And every time you bug the dev for updates he goes I'm fucking busy man Well, you know, you know what they do they're working on Russ if that happens I'm gonna call that they release the shooting script In the same size and format as the rest of the books So that pretend so that your OCD Can correctly let you put that on the shelf and fit it in just like the harry potter play. Oh, man That extra shit that came out afterwards doesn't count fuck off. It's written by her who cares She says it can she says all sorts of shit. She sure does
Starting point is 00:37:14 Who are we to argue? Can't really say much about it. Oh, man I'm so fuck you can't say the story's over and then later go on the fucking social media to crib notes your own fucking bullshit It's so fucking dumb if if if J. K. Rowling says that harry potter Follows Netanyahu on Twitter. Oh, man, then yet then that's cannon Oh, there's nothing anyone can do to take that away I still think the funniest thing about J. K. retconning shit in the harry potter is that no Joke that I have seen has talked the absurdity of the first real one
Starting point is 00:37:56 Which is wizards just shit themselves. Oh, yeah, like it's like nothing has topped it in absurdity I keep going back to that and trying to figure out if they let the mess happen and then wizard the mess away Or if they put the portal right at the hole It's also unclear whether or not they like squat or they just go standing and just and it's also unclear whether or not They magic it away or just make it invisible or that's what I'm saying, right? So fuck and then it's like, okay But what but then even then why stop at the hole like could it is it that they're creating a giant like portal hole where the entire butt goes in or
Starting point is 00:38:36 Why not just magic it out of your intestine exactly, right? Why go why take it to the source like it if you can create that portal hole Just put that right inside your body and then it never even gets and where does it go? Well, wherever the fuck it goes no matter what but my my point is if you can put in a magic portal Where in the production process of your body? Do you put the portal? Do you still and do you so you okay? So it have to be at the end of your colon because that the colon still absorbs water, okay need okay would die, okay? So so for the so it has to actually excrete. Yeah, okay. Yeah, there you go
Starting point is 00:39:19 That's it Use the Yamato The demon world is fucking just a whole bunch of human demon turns such sparta turns going on eat it That's what she that's that's what we need it sooner telling us about the devil may cry world everything's fucking weird That's the best social media ruined fiction But it's like it's almost like if there was it then there she'd be saying that to someone in a coffee shop somewhere Or it would come out in an interview and then decades later Yeah, and then there'd be a newspaper headline going Harry Potter teleports his shits
Starting point is 00:40:01 Yeah, but like it's funny double door for that matter Well, they do you remember let's say high school English class and it doesn't matter what the fuck say they gave you catcher in the Rye or some bullshit, right? And they're like What do you think the author meant by the fact that the Sun was setting through these windows and your fucking teacher would overanalyze all this fucking bullshit or whatever? Because JD Sounder was fucking dead right and existed pre Fucking like what was their newspapers are they interviewed him a couple times like all your books sucks
Starting point is 00:40:35 Oh, you mean cold in Caulfield was intended to be a character that you don't admire Yeah, I fucking hope so because he's a piece of shit Right, but now with the advent of our wondrous technology you can go to JD Sounder be like not based off my shithead brother He's a crack addict, right? done Literary work ruined forever We talked about we talked about Tyler Durden already been the past And Tyler's a hero. He's the greatest man. I want to be just like Tyler Durden
Starting point is 00:41:10 What do you think Chuck? You man, I'm gonna say it again. You idolized Tyler Durden. You got the wrong message from that story Yeah, but you've also never seen a cool film that has someone yell at you You're not your fucking cockies while the film shakes like crazy. It's so edgy. Oh, it's cool You've never seen that effect before I've never seen it. You have no defense against it. I can't it's about infiltrating my brain All right Yeah, you need defense against the dark arts man. What are you gonna do? What are you gonna do? the the
Starting point is 00:41:49 The game of Thrones thing I Was gonna say just yeah it is is is is it was it was it was it was it was it's it's a low point and You know what I'll wait I won't say any more than that. I'll just say that well that sounds dire I'll just say that like a wolf in my game of thr- I'm trying man. Yeah Um
Starting point is 00:42:21 Really pretty shots though, and the one things for sure you can see the money. Yeah, you the budget counter Definitely was was was rolling But it's hilarious because like every time a show starts out and it doesn't have that infinity budget yet You always get everyone kind of forgets because especially in a show where it's more about the politics than it is about the these wars but like You forget about oh, I don't forget But I remember the how bad some of the early war scenes were in fact including episodes where they cut away from the war Because they didn't have the budget to show you it. Well, I need you to do something for me You need to go back and watch season one
Starting point is 00:43:06 episode two 1989 of Star Trek the next generation a Fucking TV episode that is embarrassing on many levels, but holy shit that first season looks like crap Yeah, it looks like crap My the first place my brain goes with this is the show Rome Which is about the Roman Empire is and Julius Caesar and history the grandest ancient city to ever exist and every time you'd have to cut to a
Starting point is 00:43:40 Battle We just move the camera up to the sky After we hire a bunch of extras to stand there because it's too fucking expensive It's pranks my and then in the end like it's an otherwise good show But it just can't afford these battles and then and then they just run out of money And then the show is stuck being filmed between like four rooms. Yeah, it's good. Anyway TV's awful Get rid of TV. I mean
Starting point is 00:44:14 I don't disagree like if we all abolish TV Like honestly, I think that the line between TV and film has gotten really weird because I saw people talking about the runtime of those Game of Thrones episodes. I'm like, those are movies. Mm-hmm. It was an hour and 20 last night It's it's like a season of movies. Yes. This is exactly what's weird. Yeah, that right. I'm not crazy Really weird, but that's where we're at though, especially since you know TV like Game of Thrones is one of the shows that like kind of brought the prestige back to The small screen in a way the idea that like Hollywood actors that were too big for TV are now willing to do Netflix things
Starting point is 00:44:57 because you know the before it was all about the Academy, but now it's like Actually, you can tell a really good story in the course of a couple of seasons if each episode is an hour I'm trying not to fucking throw up at the noise that is coming out of the people you're talking about which is Like oh my god, just fucking go fuck yourselves No, it honestly it takes a show like a breaking bat to come along and kind of go like hey Hey that Malcolm in the middle guy made a bunch of you Hollywood fuckers look like the amateurs
Starting point is 00:45:31 You want to spend some time slowly building a character? Alright, let's do it. We got a couple seasons to go. Let's end it when it's time to end it There was a fucking article that came out going Endgame and Game of Thrones prove that audiences love endings I'm just like I can't do this right now I can't conclusions are good and things that keep on going like Homeland and whatever and and franchises that refuse to stop making some sense whatever You know our top is the our trailing off and whereas the things that people are talking about now are these
Starting point is 00:46:08 Conclusive payoffs and it's like it's almost like yeah It's almost like closure and a sense of you know Closures a fantastic feeling if you have an emotional investment or a plan Yes Also that being said the biggest trick that Avengers Endgame It's got end in the title like fucking thumbs up idiots The last movie says the word like three times. Yeah, like there's multiple moments Including the most obvious one where Dr. Strange goes were in the end game
Starting point is 00:46:42 But the trailer the end game now the title of the movie was not announced at that time At the time it was just Infinity War part two and they're like we can't tell you it'll be a big spoiler But right like he almost could have looked at the camera when he said that like we're in the end game now so the funniest part about it is that it's like Avengers Endgame is the end of the MC was Spider-Man comes out in a couple months as Part one of phase Five Like said though that he could argue that it's the 23rd movie
Starting point is 00:47:23 What whatever like it's clearly debatable This is the end of the infinity war thing. They're not gonna make a shit zillion dollars and then go okay guys We did it. We told every story that don't build up to anything ever again Yeah, I think what makes more sense is As much as like it wraps up and then there's and then we've got far from home coming out It would make much more sense to start it after this point But when you know that we're gonna get If you think we're gonna get a clean clean clean start, it's not gonna be that right now
Starting point is 00:47:59 Like the new saga is still gonna have leftovers of course because we know that Dr. Strange 2 and Black Panther 2 are coming Yeah, those are part of the new thing therefore the new thing and now everything that happens after that will be part of the Saga so that at one point 12 movies away We can have an end credit scene where somebody says the word mutant once Maybe Maybe there's also a bunch of TV shows coming. Yeah, I bet a bunch. Yeah, there's a rule There's a rumor held off on some of those announcements. Yeah, but There's a there's like a literally a rumored
Starting point is 00:48:36 What should we call it Falcon and and and Winner-Soldier movie. There's a Loki thing that they then announced Let's not go too deep into those before we get to the thing because Marvel's I feel like Marvel spoiled their own shit But they did they announced shows whatever. Yeah, okay, um Anyway, so Yeah, how's your week? What's up? What'd you do? I bought a cube. Mm-hmm. Did you see the photos of the cube? Um, I saw you enabling memes. Oh, yeah, so I like to go I like to enable memes whenever I post a stupid picture of myself or whatever. Yeah, somebody makes a
Starting point is 00:49:16 Transparent fucking version of it within like I want to say an hour. Yeah, and then I instead of just like Giving that a like I know I post that I'm gonna go go for it idiots. Yeah, no You are Snoop Dogg. Yeah, and you are taking a selfie Saying meme me put an anime girl behind me new meme. Yeah new meme Isn't me Put on a random to put on two winter hats I'm gonna I'm gonna cannibalize something plague said and put my own twist on it Because he accuses me of this and you know what fuck it. You know what the best part about memes is
Starting point is 00:49:54 me You can't spell memes without me But okay, so I've been complaining about mouse and keyboard setups forever and you have had your own Abominable progressibles into I've got I've got a little lapboard thing to by the way I watch like some of your apex stream I don't know how you don't lose your mind with the UI going crazy like that I you for whatever reason you're able to just put it out of your mind like the button prompts going nuts I mean it overwatch early was the worst of it. Yeah, I got used to that in this case
Starting point is 00:50:36 It really only changes when you're Switching through a menu. Yeah game. You're not seeing anything. Yeah But like, you know, I'm just like I don't have it like I'm put I'm on a little couch cushion with the mouse It doesn't work. So somebody Recommended to me again. It's been recommended to me a dozen times now What's called a couch master? Now if you go to name of the product that is the official name of the product and On top of that
Starting point is 00:51:10 You go to that so it's on Amazon. It's wildly overpriced like 200 bucks and You go to the product page. Oh Man everything about it Wants you to love it so bad you big gamer man Cuz like one the old version The new versions all black the old version was black and what I am now terming gamer red Well, you are familiar with the shade of red. I am describing
Starting point is 00:51:40 The shade of red that is on every fucking aces laptop Yeah, the shade of red that comes off everyone's LEDs the one that's more or less crimson. Yes. Yeah And it was gamer and the wrist rest were gamer red. Well, this one's all black. Okay, so In the promo shots, they got the they got a little energy drink in the side. You want energy drink that is gamer Got it gamer energy drink important You know what you know what's branded at the top of that fucking lapboard portion a proud product by nerdy tech. Oh, yeah this thing is exhausting to touch and look at from like a
Starting point is 00:52:21 Brick and that doesn't come with a sponsor gamer jersey with your name on the back I fucking wish and a fucking headset So that's why I went in so hard and just called it a gamer cube because fuck it Did you rise up? I rose up and my lower half of my body disappeared Then you became modoc now that being said Page came downstairs and looked at me in that shit and she laughed and laughed and laughed Cuz yeah You look like a modoc in that shit
Starting point is 00:52:54 Everyone looks like a modoc in that shit in the in the promo image try so hard They have it shot from the side and it's it's a cool handsome man in it And his fucking hot girlfriend is like lounging over one of the armrests and like toying with it Ha gamer and it's like they're trying so hard to fucking get away from the fact that you're just creating your own Star Trek fucking workstation Let me guess it works and then It's the it's better than my old computer desk. Yeah, okay. It is easily the best mouse keyboard solution I have ever used
Starting point is 00:53:35 Including most desk setup, so does it not move? By resting on your couch and or lap so the way that it works is that you have two big ass Styrofoam leather encased the fact fake leather Encased rectangles that are fairly high They go about I don't want to say they're like eight to ten inches high right and they're wide their rectangles But the squares on the right those sit on either waist right and then On top of that you place the lapboard portion, which is a big pretty fucking heavy
Starting point is 00:54:16 super wide like heavy plastic Like keyboard holder that is wide enough to hold a full-size keyboard and a full-size mouse pad on it And it's heavy enough that when you and the the cushions are sturdy enough that when you place them down You snuggled yourself in and you push it down. It's not going anywhere. It's it's steady It's heavier that like the the lapboard part is heavier than some of our sticks so so What so it's what's keeping it from moving gravity? and what is weight okay, but What is it what is the bottom of the shape resting on the bottom of the shape is resting on your couch, okay?
Starting point is 00:54:57 It's not like going down to the floor no no no Or two cushions your lap sitting to either side of your legs on your couch Okay, and the main thing that's keeping it there is the fact that they're like sturdy And they have wide bases and the keyboard and mouse portion is heavy as shit But if you bounce in your couch the couch cushions gonna move which yeah, I like it can't put a drink on that thing Did not only can you put a drink on it? There's a little drink holder, okay? Will it tightly fasten into the thing? No, it doesn't tightly fasten it It's remember it's like when you take the keyboard part off the cushions are free-floating cushions
Starting point is 00:55:31 Yeah, right, but when you don't have but when you put it on it's heavy enough that it just locks it down Okay, so the weight helps counterbalance a lot of the way the weight makes it like it's the kind of thing where I bump My knee against it because I like to sit with one foot under my knee All right, and it just bumps like a half inch and look just like it is solid Okay, when you're sitting it in it you're sitting you do your little weird fucking cross-legged like Fit into the couch
Starting point is 00:56:02 seating thing But if you're sitting with your knees going off the chair and going down to the floor normally, yeah There's room. Oh, absolutely. Okay. It's got clearance. Okay and I've used it for about a week now. It's stellar Page not only used it she used it on the one of her Dead by Daylight streams and like noted improvement and all like it is it is it is a Actual solution to Masked the keyboard on your on your couch. Okay, I've used a Corsair lap board
Starting point is 00:56:41 I've used Numerous cushions around my place. I've used an armrest I was even looking at like getting those wooden fucking mousing surfaces that you slap on the armrest It's wider But the biggest problem with all of that shit is that the height of your arm wildly varies depending on your couch And at certain weird angles like it fucks your shoulder. It's no good this thing It's good adjustable height. No, not adjustable height But it's it's the right place for light if you're sitting on your couch
Starting point is 00:57:12 No, it's no because your ass is gonna be at the same level as The fucking bottom of the cushion, which means the height of it will be similar to you sitting at a desk. I go It just it It's good and it's so overpriced. How much was it? It's 200 bucks. Okay, that's Canadian So it's like 160 USD and you have to find a place to put it after now. Why would you wait? What do you mean? Well, does it break apart? It's three pieces. It's two cushions and a big plastic like Lap board. So, okay. Okay. Like I just if I want to switch my old cushions back I just you put it on you put it under the couch. I guess no
Starting point is 00:57:53 I have I have my big I have a big fucking coffee table. So I just and I have a spot for it So just put it on that It's so like the the lap board part is so heavy that if you have one of the cushions to the left You can literally just put the whole lap board and keyboard and your mouse on The cushion and it will stay locked there not like physically, but like the gravity will weigh it down and won't move So I usually end up doing that wait You can put a cushion down. No, no, there's two cushions. Yeah, so when I get up I just take the big lap board part and then put it on the left cushion
Starting point is 00:58:28 Yeah, even though like 30% of it like you know reaches across like over nothing. Yeah, but the keyboard side is the heavier side So so weighs it down onto the cushion and just balances Okay, so it's not you don't have to open up a gamer gate of no kind no then get up No, no man walk away from so it's like really it's the kind of thing Do you look like an asshole boy? Do you look like the just the stupidest fucking gamer asshole ever? it's it's like But it's bad. It's really bad, but It's really effective and I can't even think of anything that I've even seen that would be as
Starting point is 00:59:13 Comfortable I would rather sit in this thing than sit at like a proper computer desk Wow and The problem is is that Like you would too But you have to look like an asshole You're like and you feel like an asshole because you see it and you see you are an asshole. Yeah. Yeah, you are But it but but it what do you value? What's your value like I can tell you right off the bat that like I have days where there's like four people on that couch for
Starting point is 00:59:47 No, that's not gonna work purposes and that's just a problem. Yeah, I have very few days where Like I'm actually like outside it like I'll pick a game where the keyboard and mouse matters to me Yeah, but most of the time it doesn't yeah, no, I just same thing for you know But I all you have way more PC game like the vast majority of my library is on the PC But not even that it's like my my computer is also my living room media hub and My and my TV is my primary internet browser and you know, like that is yeah I mean, I've gotten comfortable with just like the the couch normal version of that for browsing purposes Like it's only the only games I can think of where it really matters are FPS games and RTS games
Starting point is 01:00:36 Yeah, of which I don't play very many of them. That's correct. Yeah, you know So it's it's Back to the being a room Nailed it. Yeah, and I'm just think I'm just looking and I'm like I'd have to fucking put that somewhere and oh It's a dude. It's a pain in the ass, you know big like for for the few times that I'm in the mood for this thing or that thing And that's it, you know It's all it's all it's terrible ruin your life
Starting point is 01:01:08 But But it's good. Yeah That's why not just one of those things Why not just attach the desk to your gut, right? Just create some sort of shirt with the detachments so that you can fit right in there like a nice like Rubber ducky style like listen, well if I didn't have to come here on Mondays, okay That'd be one thing but I do have to leave the house so I can't staple myself into the apparatus just yet. Hmm. All right You know now what I would be literally curious to see is like are you like you're saying that there's a notable improvement in terms of
Starting point is 01:01:45 How it feels is there a notable improvement in terms of gameplay night and day. Yeah night and day Have you have you played it like an FPS game? Have you got you loaded up apex a little bay packs? I'm like, oh well If I decide to go back to playing this game, it's on PC now huh Period, there's no for anything like it is Absolute night and day and the number one reason is because now I have a big fucking wide Mousing surface for the map because that well they'm using a fucking cushion. That's the size of this fucking armrest over here Yeah
Starting point is 01:02:16 Normally and that's fine for browsing the internet or even playing a pillars or the eternity RPG or whatever But this dog shit for doing you shooty clickies, you know, you need a fucking 14 inch wide mouse surface And now I have one. It's at the right spray height And where did where did you where did this recommendation come from? people in twitch chat and Twitter over the past like a couple months actually hmm and then and Then the the the kicker was when I was like, I don't know and then I sent it to page
Starting point is 01:02:53 I'm like should I do this you fucking do it do it you pussy. I'm like, all right that The worry of the girl will think you are a loser. Oh, right. She already thinks that so it's fine It's fine. I did see that you caught the attention of one Sun High legend or soon He legend the the godlike gif maker of Twitter and that was pretty that shit needs the soundtrack to Brody Quest on it And then it's complete that made me really happy I My favorite my favorite so my favorite thing about about my couch master
Starting point is 01:03:33 Is not that I am enjoying it or it's making me enjoy my video games more It's a post from our reddit going. Oh my god, that thing looks so comfortable But I can't buy it. I just can't I can't see myself sitting in that fucking thing I can't I can't deal with it. I look like such an asshole Good for you Pat for not giving a shit that you look like the biggest asshole that's ever existed. Holy shit You're so pathetic. What a hero and I'm like, yeah, I Mean, it's not truly complete until you're rolling around on one of those Walmart chairs You know with the lab couch master gamer master on the top part
Starting point is 01:04:17 So now that I'm now that I'm bought in I'm now I'm thinking that I'm gonna start acquiring Ironic gamer merchandise because I mean look yeah, you get the you get the fucking gamer booster chair You get right you get the booster seat going so and then you put that on Walmart wheels I want to get a laptop and then you're fucking gamer cube on the go I want to I want to point out the the genesis of Me deciding to put that photo out there because I was nervous. I didn't know if I want to put the clean rip The facial expression you're making
Starting point is 01:04:56 Whatever I know no, so I took the photo and I sent it to three different people and Within 60 seconds all three sent me back the same Google image search of a kid in a high chair Okay, okay without any comment. Yeah, and I won't well now. I have to do it Yeah, I have to do it because baby needs his high chair. There you go Where are you going? This you know, you see a branding opportunity you fucking take it If you know some people get to be cool Other people get to
Starting point is 01:05:33 Modok in their baby chair. No, no, no, no embrace garbage Embrace trash. Absolutely. I have to it's it's what I got. It's where I came from get your get your get your gamer spoon Open up and is that use your user? What is the gamer spoon contain? Well, I'm just a gamer gruel. Why yeah at this point gamer formula really They mix your gamer formula up and then you be you feed it to you with the gamer spoon and you've got the gamer bib go in You know you got a little gamer rattle. Oh I already have a gamer rattle This is my Red Bull can with the tab broken off sitting in this in the center perfect. Oh, man. I
Starting point is 01:06:27 Don't know why that reminded me Did I tell you about the assholes of my recent movie going experiences? The did I tell you what happened to the fucking Shazam showing that I went to no fucking assholes are coming up the side of the the movie started it's it's going and assholes coming up the one of the aisles with their fucking phone out and the flashlight on Doing
Starting point is 01:07:01 Turn off your fucking phone. Wow. We're looking for our friend Fuck off turn off like like a full minute before and they ended up leaving the theater That's amazing because they couldn't find their friend and that was Shazam and then an end game Me and me and my pal Dan sit down. We're sitting. We got All the way in the back of the at the theater top row middle seats. I'm so happy and then There's one seat next to me. It's empty. There's like three or four guys to our right right Nice looking man. It is nice looking girlfriend come and they go hey
Starting point is 01:07:44 Buddy to the guys. It's my right. Oh This empty seats mine, but my girlfriend supposed to sit in this one. He goes no other start seat It goes I Have my ticket. He had his tickets in his hand. It's like no It's it's this number. Yep. It's this number and he goes no no it goes Okay And he leaves to go it just took to leave and as soon as he does that like and as soon as he becomes clear He's not going to find a different seat. He's going like that. Oh, it's fine. It's fine. It's fine
Starting point is 01:08:19 Okay, and they all move over one and they sit down and I go what the fuck is he thinking is he's like I don't know. This is my seat. He's like, okay, well fine. Yeah that little gripe He had that gripe moment you have between people at a theater. Yep 10 minutes go by moves about to start Four people mm-hmm from the right side show up and go hey Yep, these are our seats No, no, they're not Yeah, no the we have our tip
Starting point is 01:08:50 Fought and like they all just got huh. Yep. Yeah, and they Saunter down and saunter down to get to the all the way right side of the dead First row in the pit mm-hmm at the bottom of the theater because every seat is sold and I look over the guy next to me and I go what did they fucking think was gonna happen? Did they think that like Five or six different people on opening night. We're gonna go. Oh, okay. I guess you're right
Starting point is 01:09:25 That wasn't my seat pieces of shit and fucking peace out like pieces of shit aren't thinking They're just doing because life is giving them the opportunity and there's a social contract that everybody Operates under like they don't think applies to them because it doesn't feel good. I It's really simple. It's like people are gonna show up for these seats Yeah, but I don't care because I want to watch the movie But then you're gonna get kicked the fuck out you dumb idiot. That doesn't matter. I want to just I don't know look fuck him Oh, man, fuck you me and see that's the part where I get disappointed is that they've moved over I Would as I would have like my kingdom for a fucking theater altercation, you know
Starting point is 01:10:08 Yeah, well, I mean because it's like you're either because when you encounter that you're either getting Someone that dumb. Yeah, or you're getting someone that's like willing to go criminal Yeah, you don't know which it's gonna be it's like and I'm a little bit over the side So it's just all it's an extra show for me, but it didn't happen. Yeah, no the assigned theater seat is a nice example of Just when and how often Expectations that someone will just like it's really simple all you have to do is kind of show up turn your phone off and Not really say anything while it's going on. It's not hard
Starting point is 01:10:46 Also, don't bring a baby with you like it's it's really really really don't bring your baby But no, this baby's good. No shut up. Bring your baby challenging for a lot of people, you know, um It really is and it's and it's kind of like That whole thing about at first the hearing about the Alamo draft house and all those like high expensive theaters was like Oh, yes, go sit in your fucking tower your ivory movie theater tower in the sky Yeah, but it's really kind of like no, this is where we can get a normal movie experience Yeah, this this all these extra accoutrements I've been made just to get it back to what should be normal that like I don't need the couch. I don't need the food
Starting point is 01:11:28 I really would pay nice. I would just pay for the level of shut the fuck up and stick your seat I just want a movie theater with bouncers on every that's it. That's literally it Doesn't matter the rest of matter the rest is gravy I'm paying for the service of just shut the fuck up turn the thing off watch it, you know and and There's just there's no in-between ground on it because like theater experiences Require a crowd like if you really really hate it, you'll just always watch movies at home. Some things are better in a crowd Sometimes you get a shit crowd. Sometimes you get a shit crowd
Starting point is 01:12:04 Yeah, I think I don't think there's ever gonna be a crowd that was as good as the one that we saw Grindhouse during that was the That was the best crowd. That was a really strong crowd came for egg Understood every moment was there for the reason. Yeah. Yeah I mean the crowd that you get on opening night is generally gonna be the crowd that cares the most about the material Yeah, right Or unless it's the Tuesday right after in which case God fucking oh God have mercy on your soul Because it that just comes down to pure economics and let's take all the kids out for a cheap movie night
Starting point is 01:12:35 Because we got five of them and we're not paying $30 for every kid to get in here. So like Tuesday nights are the worst Hey, man, I can spend the money. I would have spent on this movie Getting high before the movie. Yeah, thanks, bro No, I I've Had a couple years go by in between like all the friends are going out to watch a movie on a Tuesday And every time I walk out I always go never again
Starting point is 01:13:04 And then I and that never again lasts a couple years until I forget the last the last time I saw a movie on a Tuesday was eight years ago Smart and it was a Fuck I forget what it was. It was a Marvel movie actually and I almost got into a fist fight because the guy next to me Just would not shut the fuck up the whole time Like loud like I'm like and I was like dude Be quiet and he like got up out of his chair. It was like you won't go. I mean I and it's like All right me and like miss me
Starting point is 01:13:45 10-15 minutes of the movie because I had to go get security is like hey this dumb motherfucker next to me is like It's trying to like threatening to kick my ass because he won't shut the fuck up But not just me me and my friends are watching So it's got to be like two hundred percent me Because I've got to really back up the fact that all the bullshit I make up all the time is real Oh my god, it's so like me bro Yeah, I suspect at some point. We're gonna get headphone slots. I Said I imagined that'll happen at some point. I would never trust putting my headphone
Starting point is 01:14:21 Cable wait. No, you can't get headphones slots anymore Headphones don't use cables. Oh, yeah headphones are dead. All right. So connect to the Bluetooth Like that your 3d glasses have a little fucking over the year. You know, you know what fuck it Care the d-box row should be encased in glass. Yeah, sure Why not fucking yeah with flaming pikes on Yeah, yeah once the movie starts remember turn your phone off don't be a Susie seat kicker and D-box chachink with the fucking blades Yeah on a moat it's just to keep the riff-raff out
Starting point is 01:15:06 It's so bad, and you know what and fucking take that entire d-box throw and just elevate it a little bit So that whoever's behind you gets just gets fucked like too bad Not in the d-box. So while we've been talking about this mo bemoan your station in life I've been seeing a lot of people talk in the chat about apparently having a lot of places in the US those assigned assigned seating just Nope doesn't exist As in they do it, but no one cares. No, just they just don't do it. Yeah outside of special events Yeah, I remember when a science seating started here It was originally just for the iMac shows. Oh, exactly and then
Starting point is 01:15:47 Super AVX shit. Yeah, and is now everything now. It's always a sign price. Does it solve so many fucking problems? Yeah, yeah, yeah the amount of fucking I remember going to Disney movies Yeah, with my family with my mom and dad my brother and sister and just having the fucking asshole that had like three coats But no no no the whole row. Yeah, fuck you bitch It's not the whole row. I dude at packs I was going to eat dinner at at fucking or lunch rather and like I remember and like in that crowded cafeteria area And this one stupid fucking kid is just sitting there on his phone and then I'm like, okay I'm gonna sit down here. He's like, oh, I'm use the tables, you know, and I'm like, okay
Starting point is 01:16:29 and like I grab a little stool kind of next to it and I sit there and Begin and finish my entire meal and watch as various other people walk up have the same interaction Find other like literally complete their meals and then like 25 minutes goes by and I'm like also taking a break So I'm like after I finish my meal. I'm like, let me just like I'm gonna chill man And watch as no one comes you tag back in nothing could nothing goes on. No, and I was like I was like I'm like do I do I just point out to this dude that he's a piece of shit and I was like now fuck you Oh, come on. I didn't I did mine. It's fun. I decided not fun. Yeah Cuz you're so right and but like you're just sitting there and you're like pushing away everybody and it's like dude like
Starting point is 01:17:16 Either you're and then he starts doing the thing while okay Everyone's staring at him where he starts looking up and around to see if they're coming around the corner kind of thing I like that and for a half second. I'm like, are you just lying and you're nervous and you need a lot of space So you're just making up a lie Because I feel like you might just be making something up because you just want space that's the fucking out of the house like restaurant equivalent or food court equivalent of Of Like ordering five pizzas and like turning to your empty house going hey guys the pizzas are all here
Starting point is 01:17:51 We I got some for everybody and the yeah, it's a big party. Yeah having it back there. It's a lot of yeah There's a couple there's a reddit post of some comic shop that just just showing you a stack of Theater of fucking movie tickets and just going like guys. We finally did it We finally did it. We bought out the entire theater for one screening event game Yeah, and if you come on down to our shop and spend at least X dollars on t-shirts and comics you get a free entrance to end game All right, so come to the screening and hey like we we and we and we won't be selling out the first couple rows So it's okay like good seats only all right and just fucking scalping
Starting point is 01:18:38 The entire movie theater. Yeah, because that's what they decided to do just like Pieces of shit will be pieces of shit man There's not much you can you know you can point at them you can you can probably should have but I didn't I was like yeah You know you get a like cuz you're like a big guy. You don't have to worry about like them going like a crazy In most situations, I mean again, it's well Anyway, yeah, yes, but no because also when you're in another country, you never know Yeah, also, I've seen a lot of people fight hobos back in my grocery store days. The real worry is the bite Now that's and anyone of any strength level can bite you and a human bite is an is a nightmare
Starting point is 01:19:22 Well honest though you say that but that's not the real worry That's actually a practical one that you never really hints or inches spit. Yeah. Yeah, yeah You don't really you don't really anticipate that but that that happens often enough Yeah, and that's a bad one. You know what has a lot of bad in it human bite. Yeah True you ever hear of a fight bite. No, it's when you punch somebody in the mouth and You fuck up and you you bite yourself with their with their face Like you punch them in the mouth in such a way that you cause the bite to happen to you
Starting point is 01:19:59 Happens it used to happen with bare knuckle boxers. You can get your hand amputated from that shit because our mouths are some fucking toxic Fuck okay Well, anyway, um a sign seating is great. Oh, yeah, but I don't have to bite nobody to get your good seat. Yeah, I mean admittedly like Like admittedly there there can probably come a time Like it like we'll see how things shape up because we got we got from those I think to a science eating There could come a point where it's like sit down in the seat Beep your fucking thing on a little light next to you and it turns a little light green
Starting point is 01:20:35 So that anyone walking by can just make sure that the lights green and if they don't see a green light They go get the fuck out I just realized that there is one downer to a science eating and it's probably just for theaters Because back in the day you'd get your ticket and you got there late. Guess what you're in the you're in the pit Yeah, now When you get to look at that I max row and you're like nobody even bothers to buy those pit. Yes, exactly That's great and and line-ups don't matter. Yeah, I I went to end game. I fucking showed up at like 940 for a 1015 show Line-ups don't matter and walked in got you know navigated the crowd
Starting point is 01:21:11 What's the bathroom I remember all the different every theater in the main Montreal theaters that we know we've sat on the ground Three hours for each one of those Yeah, and then you still get a kind of shitty seat You just don't get the pit It's it's they solved it man And if you are exactly you take a look at the screening and you just go like nah I'll just because I still to this day like I don't remember where my seats have been in movies For at least like almost a decade now, right? Like I really don't remember
Starting point is 01:21:48 But I fully remember where my seat was for Kill Bill Because I was down in the second row on the extreme right and it made the movie going experience Beyond worthless. I forget what movie it was but I was in a similar seat But I was actually in the pit look it was one of the X-Men movies looking up looking up and and it was 3d Yeah, I was like This is worse than just staying like this is the worst thing that has ever happened and the stupid thing about that is from What I've been told at the very least They're not supposed to do that because the film like is they're given doing hang a lot
Starting point is 01:22:29 There's a viewing angle that they're given that your theater is supposed to adhere to yeah It's a shit right and so but they're like we can cram extra seats in here So yeah, you're like literally the theater is not supposed to do that, you know, so Yeah, I should have walked out of Kill Bill, but I didn't I just want to go see it again You know, but the first time it was an audiobook to me and it like I will never forget that so it's just There's just get rid of those chairs because there's really no points even being there I'd rather fucking watch a movie and a fucking airplane seat than in the fucking pit Put the babies in the pit make it sound proof
Starting point is 01:23:08 We talking about movies are we just talking about All right anything else Played some Dragon Quest 11 some prey nothing really did nothing new to say about those things They're good. You play you play Dragon Quest. I played this one. This one's good Did you have to leave your your job as a salaryman to take the day off I did I did that's my day off game Is that has that formula changed much or is it still more or less? It's aggressively unchanged. Hmm. It's like There is one interesting thing to say about that it is like classic to the extreme To the point where it reminds me about like shining it had similarities to shining force from like 92
Starting point is 01:23:59 Because you save at a church and it plays a little jingle like it's overtly stupid classic Mm-hmm, and in some ways that's like really oh, that's nice but it has one feature that like made me like question what RPGs even are and It has the persona system where you can have like AI routines for your characters But you can give it to your main character too So it plays itself you can have every single character in your party on fight wisely Mm-hmm, and they do and they fight probably better than you or I know because they know the AI knows when an attack will kill an
Starting point is 01:24:37 enemy outright and And The regular random ass battles. I mean they're not that tough. So I'm just going through a dungeon and The game is playing itself, and I played like four or five hours, and then I was like, ah What am I doing? What is this? It's progress quest. Is this a game? You're literally my progress because I'm and but I'm thinking like I could just set it to manual But it's slower and in not getting much out of just going through the motions because I know how to do all these RPG battles you're passing your way through a dungeon and
Starting point is 01:25:14 I you know the boss fights are tough enough that I'm like I'm switching to manual control and doing all those but it's like and I'm like what it like this ancient form of RPG, right? The turn-based classic I'm like Are the were these automated back in the day? Just you were the automated one. Yes, and In fact, I would argue that even as late in the game as persona 5 It's still that because it's just more complication to automate new enemy. You don't know what its weaknesses. What do yeah? Test out every fucking attack to reflect in the weakness strong against yeah weakness found now what did you ever play? SMT-4 SMT-4 apocalypse where you get the fucking auto battle augment
Starting point is 01:26:04 I played four. Okay. Did you get the auto battle? I don't remember it. It's this. Yeah It's just it if weaknesses are known it just slams them with it otherwise Test until you find it and I'm like and then and then you're doing then you're doing the automatic fight wisely Yeah, but you're just it's just it's just making you me move your fingers. Is this a clicker. Yeah, is this is it? Does that matter? There's a chance you might get a miss or a crit. Yeah, but for the most part you're just doing it Is ATB even structurally different enough? What are RPGs? This is what this is it. This is like the game exactly. It's like and This isn't even a diss. I I was very happy and enjoyed myself
Starting point is 01:26:48 Yeah, I get it, but I'm like am I watching of it is that what is what is this? And then and then grinding is just doing that over an extended very relaxing to until the number goes up slightly and As we all know Min like you look at computer RPGs like the the you know CRP G's the ones that are D&D ish based You're like well There's a lot of like synergy stuff in that a lot of positioning It's like is that is that is that because there's rules see there's alpha strike rules and there's encounter rules The most the most complexity and difficulty almost comes in when the RPG gives you too many choices So like there's multiple optimal ways to fight. Yeah against the thing
Starting point is 01:27:30 So like we're playing say like FF 10 or for example and you're fighting a boss And it's like oh you can just keep hitting it with one of these summons It's like but or you could just bring in the fucking Ronzo and then use his particular ability and then Defend you're like you there's different ways to do it efficiently But you really only just keep kind of stick with one And if there's a weakness system involved in like you why would you ever do anything else? You know so like yeah bosses are Puzzles you have to kind of solve. Yeah, but the rest of the game is just it's weird pretty automated. That's correct
Starting point is 01:28:04 Yeah, oh, I also what the triangle? Yeah, I don't like the weapon triangle. I don't care for it. I Also played MK 11. Yeah You play MK 11. No That story is terrible. Is it it's really bad worse than 11 or worse than 10 much damn 10 was worse than 9 Yeah, that sucks every time they get away from a tournament by the way, there's no tournament in this again Was nine a fluke. Yeah Maybe and people said the injustice to story mode was actually really good And it was one and ones was pretty decent
Starting point is 01:28:38 So the first one was the best one and they fluked into it because it was the first time anyone tried that shit the store the story is I streamed the whole thing and people can go back and watch and every like 10 minutes was why don't you just X or But didn't you do what like it is okay? Well, you said this many years ago on the podcast and it was a problem with fighting game stories. Oh I hate masks El Forte. You're wearing a mask. I'm gonna kill you That's the entire MK 11 story mode and they don't use the time travel shit very well at all
Starting point is 01:29:26 They really don't It has Characters get ruined in this story mode And I'm gonna hey woolly Who'd you really like an MKX? I like to codel con. Were you slightly disappointed by his role in the story? Well chat is yelling codel jobber at me. You need to strap the fucking That character is ruined for ever I mean Nikali got fucking job just to so my choices are always fucking completely worthless in the end like
Starting point is 01:30:06 Like like ruined like he is he sucks now. I don't like him anymore After the events of this story. Wow I mean, he was kind of really dumb at the end of the last game anyway. There's no Like if you don't care, I'll just tell you later, but no, I'm gonna play it bad. I'm gonna play it Rhonda Rousey is The worst voice actor in a game with good voice acting ever. That's unfortunate. She is So terrible that I don't like Sonya anymore. I watched that I watched I did I did see a Twitter clip that was pretty not great she is so bad and
Starting point is 01:30:55 On top of that Sonya does one or two really really Like stupid awful things with the flattest shittiest delivery ever that like Sonya sucks now It was a strange cast considering She's not a voice actor Nope. She's a fighter that loses If you wanted to do mo cap or like You know 3d
Starting point is 01:31:26 Scan or something along those lines and you have a lot more to go on but as a voice actor That's not her forte. Yeah. Well, whatever MK 11 story is really bad There's one Really awesome thing that happens That's like the coolest thing they've done in Since MK 9 It doesn't save it and the villain shit is really bad Well, I'm not that invested anyway really
Starting point is 01:32:01 but cool and Get ready for a reboot again For 12 Okay, well, I'm gonna play the game. So just stop but sure Got it. All right And also, I still don't like Netherrealm fighters Like I'd much rather you talk about like what you think of the gameplay
Starting point is 01:32:25 Yeah, I played the story mode and then went I never have a desire to ever touch this again Which apparently is awesome because it means I won't be dealing with what is apparently like the worst single-player shit ever with those towers sounds Like I all I've seen was Ed Boone's tweets about how he their There's patches and some things are being exaggerated is what he said. I don't know I don't like max going this is miserable I I saw I saw some stream clips of like them doing some quick math on how how the seven currencies Add up. Yeah to time and then I saw someone putting out a number that was like six thousand dollars or something like that
Starting point is 01:33:08 Yeah, and then I saw Ed Boone going that numbers Bullshit, and then everyone's like Boone you're bad. You made the game grindiest fuck Admit it and then they said that I saw them saying we're changing it. Yeah which You know I'm barely even surprised anymore because I think I talked about it last time how it's like yeah Yeah, you shoot for the moon so that you land amongst the stars except it do that with making people angry at you and
Starting point is 01:33:38 PC version of Shooting for the moon is pissing the world off. Yeah, then landing amongst the stars is pissing off only the most yeah like you know Vocal and then people are more or less fine being grumbled Yeah, and then the PC version for MK 11 is like a trash fire and it was removed from the games listing I did not see that on on either on Twitter on the description or something. It says out now for Xbox and PlayStation 4 and they just removed PC entirely is and then The only other thing and it depends on it's a news article. I was laughing at anthem again, but Please tell me we have a reset the clock on that news this week, but that's a thing didn't hear nothing
Starting point is 01:34:22 Okay, the game's an early access now. Oh that oh Yeah, sure. Yeah, nothing happened. It's just someone said something dumb Well, no, what actually did happen is they canceled all of the road map shit and delayed everything indefinitely and said We're gonna focus on the game and had and removed dates for all future content. Oh And then I put out that post saying hey It's been 10 weeks since early access early access and everyone's like did you just put this game back in a fucking early access? And the answer is kind of yeah, because there's now no there's no date on any feature in that game anymore They're all coming later
Starting point is 01:35:09 The games rolled back and every release Yeah That's a weird one because even if you want to pull the ripcord you can't people bought the fucking thing they bought it And all I can think of is like how long was that game supposed to be supported like two years three years, right? Unless is that gonna is that entire time gonna be spent? like Fixing the base game like is there any sort of way you could like Like just you boot the game up and it just says here's your code. Here's your money back
Starting point is 01:35:41 Here's your code to enter in to get like your your PSN bucks, you know, or whatever like here Here's your voucher Yeah, if any game got was the one that got hit with like a false advertising lawsuit It'd be this one like out. You know colonial where it means that kind of petered out. Yeah, this is It's like it's hilarious. It's like did you know that that anthem hit a peak of a hundred ninety one viewers on Twitch this weekend? Mm-hmm Like a peak thought 76 at 400 It's bad it's so bad. It's bad
Starting point is 01:36:26 Who by where's not gonna exist for dragon needs to come out? Bummer man, where can people watch for where could be more anthem? Yeah, hey, yeah, no, they can watch more of me in my cube being a big gamer Over a twitch.tv slash angry's pet. That's switch.tv slash angry's pet this week It's gonna be vampire the mass grave bloodlines and yakuza 6 which Has a baby in it that This shit's weird. You just leave the baby at a bar and just go do the yakuza shit for like hours That's really weird. Yeah. Well, welcome to yakuza
Starting point is 01:37:09 Okay As far as my week goes yeah, what up, man? I What did I do? I got I got more more tattooing done yesterday. So shoulders currently healing Progress going, you know things are things are happening The insertion of like tattoo power into your body right now about 60% okay, do you feel stronger but Your transformation level but the problem is that I'm also I'm also increasing the hundred percent further Because I'm I've already added like a hundred and forty percent because I have like sleeve plants as well
Starting point is 01:37:54 Okay, so you just said No, I'm gonna yeah, I'm gonna you gonna be a human canvas. Is that what you're aiming for or what? I mean to the degree that I'm satisfied. Yeah, but I've always wanted that. What's the rule on on you? Do you you go on above the collar bone or no? Uh if it looks cool, okay? I happen to be above the above the chin. I'm a huge fan of the look of having like Clothes on with tattoos peeking through the areas that you can see. Mm-hmm. I think that looks super Luckily enough we have social media jobs, so we don't have to get real work ever again well, I as I I told my mom back when she was like if you if you
Starting point is 01:38:34 Pierce your face and wear dreadlocks, then you won't be able to get a job And I kind of very cleanly explained that I don't want to work anywhere that gives a shit about what I look like and I most certainly and the same thing you won't like you'll have issues like meeting people or friends or whatever The fuck it was and it was just like now you work for yourself Yeah, I'm like I don't want to associate with people that have a problem with the way I look so that filters out I know I think the real thing make you look like an asshole, so we're yeah now We're in a place where I'm pretty fucking happy with the way I look meanwhile I'll say that excuse me while I retreat to my fucking the fucking battle station. Yeah
Starting point is 01:39:10 Do your thing, but uh, I'm gonna keep going with it and yeah, I want to get sleeves I want to do neck it doesn't feel great, but I do want to do it because I think I think it was that like bad Is that like ow? It's out. Yeah, it's out the neck specifically. Oh, yeah, it's how but You know lots of people do it Mm-hmm, and in the end I it's just I don't like it's like yeah, but the end results worth it So you just are you gonna get like a like a cat? No the other way so that your belly buttons like a butthole not even remotely close. No, I'm gonna do that. No, all right, I Don't know if my stomach is prime canvas material quite frankly. Have you ever it's not exactly a fucking six pack
Starting point is 01:39:51 Really, I will stop making fun of every single aspect of the tattoo piercing experience based on one factor if you get the word ice Tattooed some more or cool ice Somewhere on your body in that font I Would do it like when I need the bottom of your fucking when when we're at when we're at the point that there's There's so much. There's so many that it doesn't matter. Yeah, I'll do it I'd have no problem with that. Oh, man
Starting point is 01:40:22 Because the significance of them goes down as you yeah, right to the mosaic because when you when you see like you know Tattoo show or whatever as the lady or the guy is like the head to toe, right? Yeah, and then they'll go Yeah, there's this shitty one on my elbow like yeah, what does that fucking matter? Yeah, I'll drop a cool ice in there somewhere. Yeah, fucking yeah I got a hero. I remember when we found out he was German and we both went oh, yeah makes perfect sense Yeah, that's okay. Yeah, totally. No, he's only a hero because he leaned into it. Yeah, that's got more. Yeah, that's why Yeah Because you could easily just become the really shamed and embarrassed person who you know has become a recluse
Starting point is 01:41:05 Yeah, and then and whatnot but anyway, so What did I do? I? Beatkiss had a zero. Yeah, did you know it at all? That is I'm going to Reintroduce it it is a game that is worth your time It's currently on Steven switch fucking amazing music
Starting point is 01:41:31 really great pixel art simple-ass gameplay presented with a really fun story in between Stages where you effectively you're just a Platforming samurai and you got one hit and everyone else dies in one hit and you just got a you know do a perfect run through a Almost like a super meat boy with a slashing button Yeah, I felt like it was like mark of the ninja hotline Miami applied to it
Starting point is 01:41:59 Really really fun story is definitely like trippy and weird and interesting Characters are like fucking They're all every character is an extreme version of whatever genre or class they represent and oh That's not good and the game overall just Of the game just overall fucking crushes it at each thing that it tries to do Including when it decides to switch up the gameplay for fun to try different things out like there's a
Starting point is 01:42:33 There's a like a little bike mission and you get to try using out your your you know your your powers and like a bike Mission kind of setting almost like you know how like a near automata switches to like shmup modes And you get to kind of use yeah slightly too often Ah fuck off. Iker Iker is the best That those shmup modes are not Iker Uga There there's there's some of them are and some of them are not but Yeah, and in any case the the mode switching and it is really really fun. It's not a zero super super sick I'm gonna be playing it. What are you showing me a picture of? Robotnik? Oh
Starting point is 01:43:13 This just happened. Well, was that Jim Carrey? Yeah. Oh, yeah, you want to get real close into that? Yeah, that's good, huh? Oh This is gonna be good. Oh This is gonna be good. Oh That's fucking hot Hell, yeah, lean into it me myself and Robotnik lean into it. Oh, man Fuck yeah Man
Starting point is 01:43:50 There's gonna be more new new bad forms of sonic than the classic It's gonna be it's like there's gonna be its own thing and we're gonna see the two fan bases like jerk off at each other in anger Holy shit Wow, you're gonna have chubby sonic in an extreme edge adventure sonic And then you're gonna have boom and fucking movie Just clashing each other Wow, I Can't believe they're going that way with it. I mean fuck detective Pikachu was kind of like
Starting point is 01:44:24 It's like it's detective peak. What what is it where they figured it out? You know Like detective Pikachu Doesn't look as horrifying as you would expect this type of premise to look it doesn't sound as bad as it's you think it You think it would be They took they took the the actual reality of their cartoon animals to their logical conclusion so Eli did a really decent breakdown of like why people will never be happy with sonic and it's cuz Sonic's a fucking cartoon Like he's there. He has no bearing on reality whatsoever. Yes. He has a fucking mono eyeball
Starting point is 01:45:03 Yes, so you're either gonna fucking do that and it's gonna look fucking creepy and weird Yeah, or you're gonna try and make it realistic at which point it'll look creepy and weird and everyone loves something different because they love I think that's not real decided to go just hey just do it real and Whatever it looks like it looks like and that's when we got people like oh my god Mr. Mine like the fuzz on mr. Mime's arms is making you want to throw up Yeah, but like it's great But remember too that even Pikachu before it became the movie mascot There is the fat original
Starting point is 01:45:39 Oh chunk chunk. Yeah, yeah, pika chunk a lotty coming Pikachu Yeah, that thing that everyone loves because that looks more like a dumb little rodent that can barely carry itself Yeah, that's oh there's that's gonna be good. Oh man sonic movie looking hot Where was I even fucking going? I guess I was gonna say katana zero's worth your time and money and you should play it and you should buy it and I'm Gonna be streaming that it is fantastic Fucking excellent game especially after completing it There's a very clear thing that I would like more of that they play they play with things in the game and
Starting point is 01:46:18 Then return you to the normal and then they play with other fun things and they give you teases Mm-hmm, and you kind of just go like I wish they could expand on this maybe later. Maybe later, but for now Grab that shit. It's it's fucking great. So you're gonna stream it probably gonna stream it. It's a good game You should stream it. I Played Power Rangers battle for the grid and Is that game a piece of shit? So it fits in with it fits in with all the other like It fits in with the games like
Starting point is 01:46:56 Rising Thunder fantasy strike metal revolution like easy access fighting games. Yeah way It has basics that like this is the first of those gay types of games that is like a Marvel type game It's like it's specifically they have characters doing Marvel moves, but it's easy action easy action Okay, easy operation. Let's call it. Yeah, the EO the EO games and But the difference is that those games like Don't feel like their phone games when you're playing it That's why I asked because it it looks like a mobile game. It looks like a fucking Marvel
Starting point is 01:47:38 Mobile game or like a those wrestling mobile games. It truly does feel like the mobile game It what originally was except now Responding to buttons and they've added the Zord to it Um Yeah, but they did get they did get some FGC folks to like come in and like add some shit to it So that like seeing people talk is saying J-Wong helped work on it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah So they did definitely help make a tear with all the all the all the Rangers So they there's some crazy-ass infinites and nonsense and it's full. Okay. It's full-on poverty
Starting point is 01:48:14 But there's dirty mix-ups and like there it's a it's it's it's full-on poverty But it has the potential to make you go Trying to be like the fucking modern Sailor Moon because you just you're playing it and it's nonsense But then you call you so you call in a striker and do a fake cross uncross up and they get opened up from it And it's just like you know, so it has those moments So it's the most it's a type jank. You can feel the hype jank in there terrible fucking genre. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah EO that's awful EO. Let's go Also remember playing that game at a fucking friend's house and I couldn't believe it. I'm talking about Capcom
Starting point is 01:48:56 Yeah, yeah easy operation if you guys aren't if you like that's obscure now Well, just like walk forward and do a super sonic boom with the flick of an analog stick Oh my god, what the fuck is this? the weirdest thing about Power Rangers in particular is that like the lineup is They're all like you have Billy and then you have Tommy has been not Billy. So you have Tommy and you have Jason yeah, and then you have like the like yellow from a different Generation yeah, and whatnot and then you have like you have like the black mass produced like soldier kind of thing But you don't have blue
Starting point is 01:49:43 So it's no blue. You know blue. It's like a core color So you're basically and like there's alternate costumes for for some of them, but it's weird It's just weird. It's like the roster is not what you'd expect you'd expect here are six Rangers of the various colors Yes, and then we are going to do the thing where we go. What generation do you want to play as yeah? But that's not what they did that's weird. So instead they just pick specific people from specific Generations of it, and I guess there's gonna be DLC, you know, but yeah, anyway I thought that I don't know. I don't know what I thought about that game Which game the game you were just talking about. Oh, I'm Rangers battle for the whatever. Yeah
Starting point is 01:50:31 Let's go play though. I thought it was kind of a joke I thought it was like a joke fan game when I first saw it on max stream only find out it's a real game Yeah, when you call in the Zords, it's it's basically like calling in the Infinity Stones and Marvel Infinite Yeah, you know like just go go go play the the the Zoid fighter on Super Nintendo And you're good, but but I will like you can here's the thing the real test as I explained when I was taking a look at it It was like When a tournament's done and you're back in the hotel room and everyone's eating and drinking and chilling Yeah, can you pop this in and so it's fun and have some fun and the answer is you can pop it in for three games tops
Starting point is 01:51:08 Yeah, that's because it takes three games to play the entire roster. Yeah So That sucks. All right Beyond that throw adventures at the Avengers at the end. Yeah throw avengers at the end That shouldn't be that long actually, but Feel like my thoughts on that are relatively concise. Yeah, there's a lot of little bits that I liked but yeah, yeah That's why yeah, we can we can do like big thoughts are like relatively News there's a big fucking breaking news right now with riot
Starting point is 01:51:42 If you saw people in the chat talking about that I did not people are gonna fucking walk out on riot Because riots trying to block people from suing them over gender discrimination. What's happening? So riot Well publicized shithole place to work riot games is apparently trying to block people from suing them over being Notorious shithole place to work riot games, which is causing a Bunch of employees to threaten to walk out like a mass Kotaku and Waypoint and shit are fucking got any backstory on this
Starting point is 01:52:22 Well, I mean have you been following the fact that like riot is basically run by a bunch of macho dickheads I haven't okay, right riot sucks There's been this has been a long ongoing story for like I Want to say like a year coming kind of ironic the name of the company. Yeah, but go on The the bait like remember remember the fucking diva Music video and all those diva skins. Yeah, like they fucking stiffed the women who made those skins for example Okay, and it's just how they didn't pay them. Oh, wow, okay?
Starting point is 01:53:01 They didn't get anything for it. Jesus. I think one of them got fired afterwards um But like it is just it is just an old-fashioned fucking boys club place to work apparently Which has led to there was a big bunch of stories about this like a while ago And people are threatening to sue them Right and then they are trying to use the legal trickery to go. No, you're not allowed to sue us because you worked here Which is having people? Threatened to walk out at this point
Starting point is 01:53:38 It's a mess that shit's a mess It's a think of How do I put this? How do I put this remember the the the shit that was going on at quantic dream? But the rugby. Yeah, this is not a rugby cloakroom. Yeah, imagine that but just bigger It's a bigger version of that place with infinite money. Yes, because the league is infinite money. That's correct hmm That sucks
Starting point is 01:54:09 Yeah, I don't know anything about this story. I had something to do with arbitration Agreements people are talking about chat. No legal action allowed. Okay. Well, I mean clearly we're not Super up to date on this but what so what's the part of it? That's breaking right now the the fact that employees are threatening to walk out there over the over the fact that they are Trying to force people into private arbitration under some California I think it away with not paying people that made skins. I don't fucking know I'm probably wrong. I'd like to catch the details on that because that doesn't sound like honestly
Starting point is 01:54:42 I haven't fallen all that close legal Yeah, that sounds that sounds criminals. So what? Okay Yeah, right continues to be in the trouble walkout right games decisions to try and block lawsuits filed against the company prompted an enormous Eternal blowback. It's still wrestling with this is a waypoint article on Waypoint on vice on Friday Kotaku reported riot took steps to prevent employees from taking legal action against the company after multiple lawsuits were filed in the wake of Kotaku's investigation into the studio's culture of sexism last summer
Starting point is 01:55:17 The reaction to the aggressive move prompted talk of an employee walkout according to two employees at riot And an internal slack message sent to rights chief diversity officer to employees Waypoint granted the employees an anonymity to speak about issues that could impact their employment. Okay talk of a walkout has been brewing All right, so chats correcting me on certain details It was not payment, but they did fire the woman who did make that neon Akali skin You know the most popular one the one with the hat. Yeah, okay the ninja one with the neon She got sick hand afterwards after the work was done. Okay, like oh come on Okay, this is one of those breaking stories that it's hard to really
Starting point is 01:56:05 it to talk about because there's too much to read and find out at this point in time, but Based on us guessing the news as we sit here and guess the news that sounds pretty awful and That sucks All I did my my my riot like thing is just a big League of Legends Sit in there for waiting for fight of light fighter a legend of fighters. Yeah, that's not gonna happen fight league but Okay, well, that's not where I was originally gonna go. Where are we going? I was going somewhere else disappointing. Oh
Starting point is 01:56:46 Fuck it's sick. It's a good way for disappointment sure is What do we got we can talk about? like we could talk about the the unreunre cancellation of or delaying of Titanfall or Whatever the fuck you want to call it This is a really weird story for a lot of reasons like we could talk about the part where I made my piece
Starting point is 01:57:13 And now your piece has been on and now my now I you know like my watch was ended and now I have to fucking roll out of the grave on it and get all bummed out again So what are you talking about? But it's not cancelled. It's delayed whatever but Effectively they just kind of came out and said yo apex did so good that we have to delay every Titanfall project so that we can do more apex I guess and one of the things is specifically because we don't want to put the team respond through crunch But here's the thing When you use the word delay as opposed to cancel or shelved. Yeah, it's good. It's better. Yes Because if you tell me that you're working on something until you announce that it's canceled, I'll believe
Starting point is 01:57:58 So when you're saying what you're lucky for you I believe what you say Titanfall 3 is delayed right up until after apex is no longer popular Mm-hmm so Mm-hmm. I find it interesting because this was framed as like listen. We we have the same staff We could crunch them, but we're not going to which is Fairly interesting considering. I mean like nether realms crunching people I didn't everybody's crunching people now
Starting point is 01:58:31 I didn't like the wording because it was unclear what it meant Because the quote was in order to fully support apex legends We respawn are pushing out plans for future Titanfall games No resources from the apex legends teams are being shifted to other titles and development here at the studio Nor are we pulling resources from the team working on Star Wars Jedi fall in order? That's the executive producer drew McCoy They seem to imply Whatever weeks ago that there were already separate teams on these separate projects
Starting point is 01:59:06 Yeah, and it sounded like they had four things in development Which is a lot for a team like respawn. Yeah, but there was apex which is as we know huge breakout hit Star Wars which as we know has to be a huge breakout must be big hit And then there was Titanfall the new project and then there was Titanfall VR mmm, I Guess the decision was those things don't matter in the wake of apex and Star Wars, which yeah fair What are you gonna? What are you gonna say? It just hurts because Obviously Titanfall is the franchise that I care the most about of those three things. Well, so I'm not happy to hear that
Starting point is 01:59:49 So you're saying they should crunch them Hmm. Yeah, they should crunch them to get your Titanfall No, yeah, see exactly. No, that's not what I'm saying. I'm being I'm being a dumb internet commentator They don't have a bunch of people. They don't have the size bandwidth and And What are you gonna tell a studio? Hey, don't take on big contracts that pay yeah studio huge money to keep you guys like Do you get the feeling that at this point unless the studio comes out and it's like we are not crunching our gang That they're all crunching them
Starting point is 02:00:31 All the time every project I've ever been on had crunch time Like Crunch you say it as if it's like a new Like no, I don't say it's a new it's but literally every product crunch time is a phase of development The problem the bigger problem is that apparently for some companies, it's not a phase of development it's Development is crunch. Mm-hmm That's no good man that can't go on like that forever when your producer doesn't allow for enough time or
Starting point is 02:01:11 And so in some cases it's incompetence, but in a lot of cases. It's over-promising It's easier to You know because people are really happy if you can deliver things quickly Yeah, so in some cases you're gonna see over-promising in some cases you're gonna see under estimations, but Every single project I've ever worked on Has had a crunch time like I don't know what it looks like to not so it's fucked up Yeah, you know and but but it it's pretty much just like we're nearing the end and because you know what it is And it depends on what the nature of your job is right so like
Starting point is 02:01:53 Like QA in particular is a job that has no ceiling. Yeah, a game can never be too clean right it is just Tested until the like The like date like how how few bugs you find just keeps going until like the chart it goes off the chart But it never stops. There's no point where zero bugs exist. Yeah, so as You approach submission The more time you spend the better no matter what under all circumstances Because anytime spent possibly finding that next bug is worth it even shitty non-productive time
Starting point is 02:02:34 From a compliance point of view you can the game can be clean Right because there's a finite set of rules and if it adheres to those rules Like unless really really particular weird things happen in particular ways, which is always possible It seems like you can mark something as more or less clean When you work on when you when you're an artist your job comes to an end Yeah, you know at some point you don't have any more to do so when you're Programming you're often going up to the last second You know because there's always something that needs to be tightened up read you have to tighten up those graphics on level four
Starting point is 02:03:15 But no in some cases. It's just literally like Can we optimize loading here? Can we you know like what can we do? Can we do something? How come the movie business gets away with actually hitting their deadlines because there's You watch a movie in one way and that's it. There's no There's no player interaction Involved in a movie. Everyone has the same experience There's no variables that we don't know about until it's in your hands when it comes to a movie. I Don't know man. I find it difficult to even understand this concept because
Starting point is 02:03:51 My only real-ass job that wasn't this crap was me working in that fucking grocery store And for all the faults that that shit had because it was retail hell. I punched in And then ten o'clock rolled around and I punched out. Mm-hmm. And then the boss would say hey It's not done. I went you scheduled me to ten go fuck yourself. Uh-huh. And if they gave me shit I talked to my union rep. Yeah, and then they'd tell my boss to go fuck themselves. You weren't specialized in a particular skill that was a part of a Multi-year production that sure needed you and your specific expertise You know and people in the movie business are however
Starting point is 02:04:32 Yeah, they are and like I like I don't get it. How cut like the Game devs need a fucking union. It's it's it's it's just it's really just bullying employees that are like That care about their work You know the amount the amount of times I've read the story of like yeah, I burnt out and now I work in software development and I go home Right like It's fucked It's it's people that are passionate about what they're working on that they will in many cases depending on the size of the game That passion gets will get exploited and just and you're searching for that passion when you're hiring
Starting point is 02:05:15 Right when you're taking candidates doing interviews You're looking for people that have that the people that get obsessed with what they're working on that do have perfectionist qualities That want to keep going at it. Yeah, that think about stuff off the clock and bring in a new idea the next day like that's a great employee to help make your game be better, right and Like the human battery Aspect is not taken into account You know, it's just It's the way it goes
Starting point is 02:05:48 Yeah, it's fucking dirt it's dog shit man. It really is well like Fucking union political issues aside. Do you think it's the kind of situation where if the game devs tried to unionize that? They would get fucking swept and you'd see a bunch of studios get shut down because I think that that fear is Exaggerated I think the ability to outsource The entirety of development to other locations would have been done already if that was feasible union or not No, they'd find a way They'd find a way if they looked at it and just went like like if they if they saw
Starting point is 02:06:28 if the cost of development Got affected in such a way where like the union unionization process cut in I don't even want a ballparker percentage out there But the point remains that the amount that is enough for them to be afraid of it Yeah, why wouldn't they just Walmart the situation and shut it the fuck down well because Walmart service industry, right? It's not making a fucking like I don't know like My job like my job. Yeah, my job at one point in time
Starting point is 02:07:04 Was to create tools so that they could find ways to go to other countries and train other countries employees Across the world to be game savvy enough to QA at the level that we were currently QA and games right and My job was to create a test to show art to figure out how much do you play games? How knowledgeable you of are you of gaming conventions and the basics of like, you know, what an RPG is what?
Starting point is 02:07:42 Yeah, you know a first-person shooter is what it's expected to be enough so that when you play it You know what to do and what to look for and you know what a problem looks like when it's not supposed to be there and And as a result there are no QA firms or departments in North America or Europe Well, I was specifically asked after the test came back and like a lot of people failed it in their test area That I was told to then drop the difficulty and make it easier to which is defeats the purpose of the exercise It does but but you're when you're looking for a positive result when you have some confirmation bias in you
Starting point is 02:08:22 Because it's gonna make things like much more cost-efficient. I don't know. I remember, you know, do you remember? You remember calling Bell Canada in from 1993 2005 ever once I fought that by the way, just so you know, oh, I know, okay I actually told the story of three four weeks ago. Okay, but you ever call Bell Canada for any reason? No, and the nightmare that that was which was back in the day it was it was the outsourced fucking phone nightmare and
Starting point is 02:08:55 It's like people whose the language was not English as their first language reading off a script That they were not properly trained to do and I was like, it's the worst thing ever and now That's gone. They've actually rolled it back because the damage that was done to those companies from that awful awful experience lasts and That alone makes me think that it's like Say, what are you gonna do you're gonna fly everybody in Trey arc Out to some out to fucking see check republics. So you don't have to pay him properly see all just gonna go
Starting point is 02:09:33 No, that's the thing right is that I think it's a bit short-sighted to think that like it's just gonna come down to Switching countries and finding somewhere where the unions don't exist or something like that I think it looks a lot more like the situation with Montreal and You be soft you be school. Yeah, you familiar with how that works. I am not familiar Well, it's quite simple here in Montreal. There's a you be soft you be school. Okay, you can go to it It'll teach you about various Aspects of game creation. Yeah, you want to be an artist you can take that program if you want to be a level designer You do that, etc, etc, you know and at the end of the year you graduate providing
Starting point is 02:10:13 You don't fail and you become the new class of level designers All looking for jobs in level design There are a Limited extremely limited number of positions at Ubisoft itself where they look for some level designers And there's a bunch of other places which used to need level designers But currently don't because they're getting a fresh batch every year right, okay Ubisoft then with their like one or two positions open will basically be like okay who wants it and
Starting point is 02:10:48 The people they're going through are Literally cramming into the funnel where there's two there's two spots And like 30 people are pressing in and then 12 months later another 30 are pressing in yeah, and so on and so forth ad nauseam and The on the other side since the supply and demand is so imbalanced. They get to be like, okay How low can we pay you how it sounds like a good reason to go into business for yourself? you know how Great can we make how how much can we sweeten the deal on our side since we get to pick from the litter? Yeah, and we get to pump out more every 12 months
Starting point is 02:11:27 It's a little bit of a thing You know and in some cases like but that's like may pardon me if I'm I'm like if I'm ignorant on this But that sounds like the kind of situation where a long-standing Like labor agreement would actually be highly beneficial It certainly would especially if you're creating skilled workers in a particular thing right have a particular like trade I guess but There isn't necessarily The they're like you're creating like there there's more people trained to do the thing then there's more workers trained than there are actual
Starting point is 02:12:00 Oh much more available. It's not shit like plumbing. I remember when I was a kid my dad said hey If you don't know what to do with your fucking life Become a plumber There's too much work. There will always be too much work for plumbing. Yeah So there's a bit of an oversaturation problem in certain programs where you know like there's just not enough jobs for The program but they will always take you in and take your money and teach you What needs to happen and you know it's a school so whatever but So there's already this kind of undercut culture in a way and well the the undercut culture for the burnout stuff to my
Starting point is 02:12:39 Understanding has always been like you can burn these people out as hard as you want because there's always gonna be that fresh new batch coming in Like you can crunch people as hard as you as you want because The the young generation that doesn't know about that shit You know and doesn't know that their time is like five to ten years tops in most cases We'll come right in and go. Yeah. Oh, I want to make the next Assassin's Creed colleges, whatever and God forbid that like the team or project or studio you're in shuts down and then a whole new Bunch of specialists with way more experience than you on the market flood in yeah, and like Honestly, the jump to the top like the the everybody's like focused on crunch as it's like dude working a hundred hour a week
Starting point is 02:13:29 Or else you're fired is like fucked Right or or not or else you're fired or else, you know, we'll just see what happens, right? I don't know what's worse either that or the fucking bust boom hiring shit where it's like We got we got a we got a crunch it hire a hundred people that we know we're gonna fire But we're not gonna tell them, you know, yeah, like and we'll have the move Right, I think Kurt Schilling and all that fucking crap with that. What was his fucking count the armor or shit? 50 52
Starting point is 02:14:09 42 whatever this is his number is fucking bullshit where he's like hey the company will pay the Mortgage on the house that you had to buy to move out here. Oops company went bankrupt now. You have two mortgages fuckers Is like 38 38 like that dude should be in jail But he's not because this sportsman is rich so you go do back to sports talk fucking asshole Yeah, it's interesting because the It would be it would be I Would like to see what the results were if you asked people like would you be willing to take a hit on?
Starting point is 02:14:50 Video games either in terms of production in terms of how long it takes for them to come out in terms of how much they cost Yeah in terms of all of these aspects in order to know that the people working on the games are like not being abused Basically, they're like the diamond industry. Yeah, like blood games. Yeah, would you be okay with? Waiting longer and spending more to know that your games are not blood games only on one condition So let's take Activision for example, and thanks Jim for giving me the ammunition for this one. Let's take Activision and Call of Duty, right? Let's say they're crunching the Call of Duty gang, right? I would gladly take hits to the Call of Duty map size or
Starting point is 02:15:38 Stability, you know, whatever assuming that the the devs wouldn't have to crunch or they got the resources they needed whatever The day they start paying taxes Jim recently did a great video about Activision and how Activision not only doesn't pay taxes to the United States They get tax money back due to some tax-holding shit So I so so a lot of that now you're getting into something way more complicated because you're getting into the what city? Do we drop our mega studio in? Well, you'll have to sweeten the deal by courting us and we'll do a little song and dad And currently that city is Montreal actually. Yes, we will give you sweet-ass incentives
Starting point is 02:16:25 There's no money down to be here Yeah, which makes it so that us living in Montreal as Not employees as citizens of this city are if you're interested in this industry, you're in a good place Yeah, right. It's nice. It means I sitting here doing nothing and paying for Moral combat to come out in some form indirectly But yeah, effectively that's thought that that process of like we want you in our city because you increase our Our commerce is a whole other prospect. It's a weird. It's a whole thing. You're backing this you're you're going back to like
Starting point is 02:17:02 Well, I should mention Activision doesn't pay any taxes is because they have some bullshit holding company shit in a basement in the hall under whatever Like it's it's tax avoidance. It's offshore money So okay like all the DLC crap and all that's like, oh, we don't have a shut the fuck up You don't even pay daily, you know, like now there's plenty of money to go around now I suspect and in fact a part of my my faith in my fellow human beings relies on the fact that I Think the answer to my question for most people upon being asked would be absolutely or
Starting point is 02:17:39 Let's let's even be more charitable probably Most people would say yeah, probably Why do I feel that there's a cutoff? That enters the world of people who maybe don't pay attention to this news because if you're listening to this podcast You probably follow game news enough or hear about events Yeah To care about what's happening and to know with the name of a studio sure
Starting point is 02:18:03 But if you happen to be someone that that doesn't matter to you And you more or less like games enough to walk into a game stop buy one and walk out and that's the extent of it Would that person necessarily think the same thing? The main is maybe if they knew about it The main issue comes down to their own personal life circumstance The the probably the one that that exemplifies this this weirdness is Do you remember the What was it called it was the voice actors guild doing a thing with performance matters Do you remember that mm-hmm? Do you remember how a bunch of developers mm-hmm got super fucking pissed mm-hmm?
Starting point is 02:18:42 Like I don't get any royalties. So fuck you Troy Baker or whatever the fuck whoever it was I think Troy was a big on that, but I don't quite remember specifically just using him because he's the biggest shit And apparently we're like one degree of separation away from him now. Hey Troy I know Mr. Beast But Then the typical response came back is like you probably should get royalties man Like right, but it comes from your personal place So man who goes to buy the Madden and go why Madden more ten dollar mm-hmm, right?
Starting point is 02:19:16 Because so and so whatever but if that man I was pretty pissed when I went to buy Street Fighter 4 and it was $79 right, but and if that man worked bad gas station job Bad money mm-hmm man. Don't care. Yeah less game. Yeah less game more money Yeah, and then it's $10 could be other steam game. Yeah $10 could be footlong or five beer $10 could be Hollow Knight on sale. Yeah You know yeah That's real yeah, so this is what I'm saying, you know and also like let's and if you really want to fucking get into it What kind of phone you got there? Oh, you mean the one that's built by a Chinese slave economy. Yeah, yeah this one
Starting point is 02:20:01 How much you pay for that? Oh a couple hundred bucks compared to how much we think it actually cost to make I don't know a couple thousand dollars and I'm gonna take the cost of human suffering out of it And if what if you made it here? Yeah? Man you guys enjoying the stream the stream running on technology built by slaves you have any burgers recently Enjoy him. I did yeah, yeah Market the market oh This is awkward, huh? Yeah Because solving this problem. Oh, no is actually addressing
Starting point is 02:20:42 Literally our modern economy as a whole this is how it works kind of like a big problem It's kind of and it's almost as if we're shooting Out of our expertise zone. Yeah a little bit. It's almost as if we're touching on things We have no ability to understand much less proposed hypothetical solutions to almost yeah But what do I know? I'm not Tim Cook. I don't know who Tim Cook is Tim Apple Fuck him. I'm not Jeff Amazon You mean I'm gonna send a robot horse to your house. I'm not Amazon. I'm not mark Facebook I'm I can't fully comprehend
Starting point is 02:21:27 Exactly how I don't know. I don't trust any of those guys For a multitude of reasons. Hey, well Jack Twitter. Yeah out there. Oh, yeah, uh-huh. He's doing things. Uh-huh. He's sitting down Dude make me king of the world. I'll fix it dude like Straight up you want to not have crunch time on your video games That's right. You got to pay $10,000 for your iPhone With the full tech because they came up with the full tech you hear those things are like every review Thing they sent out broke with a day. Well, I a bunch of them did and then yeah So which is why you don't buy the first version
Starting point is 02:22:08 But you know or you buy the the Huawei one that they fucking stole And made on their own Anyway, dude, so we have this whole conversation, but you know what? It's really exciting human augmentation Let's just kick that can down the road. I just like You want You want your your your you want to get rid of blood diamonds? You want your your ethical video games?
Starting point is 02:22:37 You want your no crunch sticker on the cover of a game before you buy it? Yes, I do this game was no employees were crunched in the making of this game. Oh, and there are no dolphins Inside of this can of tuna One hundred percent no dolphin crunch-free you want your crunch-free video games, sir I hope you're willing to fucking upset la revolution. Okay, I hope you're willing to turn the whole thing on its head Okay, because it goes from there to the union to the fucking company to the placement of the company's choice in the location to the tax breaks and Then them trying to create a profit margin and the comparison to other businesses and the shareholders all that crap Oh shareholders need to see those numbers
Starting point is 02:23:24 Economic theory about maximizing value for shareholders only came about in like the 70s. It's actually really new. Yeah Yeah prior to that ever the the well-understood like idea was that the idea for a company was to maximize value Not create money for shareholders But some Nobel Peace Prize guy made some paper and everybody got it the high on balls on it or You're gonna see that game getting sold for 40 bucks on day one at fucking Walmart or Future shop and guess what you're gonna go do gonna buy that fucking $40 game Yeah, or you're gonna see the Amazon deal where you buy it by pre-ordering on Amazon to get 10 bucks off
Starting point is 02:24:06 And guess what you're gonna fucking do what you're gonna fucking pre-order that game and get it for 10 bucks off. Oh, man. Yeah Yeah Yeah, that's what you're gonna do. I would love to see a crash of like almost all the major game publishers Into smaller companies Because if they're crunching on indie at least they're crunching themselves Does that make it better yeah But the weeks that I put like that was the argument that that dude used when he was talking about What the fuck what game was it where he was like no no no no no I was saying we voluntarily crunched
Starting point is 02:24:48 Yeah, not ever not everyone ever voluntarily crunches, but what do you remember the story I'm talking about yeah was Something rockstar. Yeah. Yeah, and then everyone anonymously came for me like yeah, he's full of shit dude Like if you want to get real Those Cuphead guys are probably out of their minds. Yeah, probably Same thing with the haul. I'm G not I'm GMT, but whatever like it they're probably nuts. Yeah, and Like we're just going yeah the triumph of the individual spirit You're you're like little you're likely addiction to your work and potential illness is
Starting point is 02:25:32 Something we fucking want to throw money at you for cuz you won't quit. Yeah, I mean, what do you get? What do you what do you what do you do about what do you you know? Yeah Like some people are just gonna work it that hard man There's nothing you can do about that admitted well what you can do is put weights on them so they work slower There is objectively of course It's a place where it's like the difference between forcing someone to do it because it's their job and someone will willingly doing it is Where you can draw the line? I suppose that's a lot of that's that's a logical place The fuzziness of that line is where like the current AAA industry likes to live
Starting point is 02:26:06 Which it's like hey, man, I'm not gonna say we're gonna fire you I'm just saying promotions are coming up man. It's got a really impressed the impress the houses of the houses come in here It's easy to you not working there and be like what was going on now people not working. Don't like the cowboys I mean look if you're salaried And you're you have a task and the task requires completion you got to come in and do the hours until the task I know salary sounds like a thing for suckers. Oh, you'd rather buy the hour. Yeah. Yeah, let's just say for bet for you Do we kind we were kind of like by the hour right or what do we do what is this this is not at all like that I don't know what this is. This is not that okay. This is advertising. Okay, that's that's a whole different thing
Starting point is 02:26:50 This is a word from our sponsors Yeah, and then the advertising money is gonna all dry up when people realize ads aren't real and then Whatever what everybody has a really comfy mattress. Yeah, and then we're gonna have and then we're gonna have to start selling our blood So and you know what you know what I'm saying by the way I'm not saying we're gonna sell our blood to like the you know the blood bank or whatever You know, we're gonna sell our blood to you guys at home. Who wants some of my blood? You do crazy shit with it You can clone a tiny little pack. Hmm
Starting point is 02:27:19 So think about that feeling the next time you purchase a game at a highly discounted rate gamer blood Thank you at the end of the credits You can even have a little sticker that that pops up saying this game was expressly made with crunch time 10,000 employees across multiple countries were crunched. Yeah in the making of this game Yeah, feel that and you at the end of the at the end of the crunch time thing. It's like these are the babies These are photos of parents meeting their children for the first time These are the crunch babies. Yeah Fathers were allowed to see at the end of development. Yeah. Yeah
Starting point is 02:27:56 Yeah, I was about to say at the mother mothers and fathers were allowed to see and then realize that didn't make much sense at all Does it I Don't know how mom could not see the the crunch baby Well, quite frankly, it's just going to a tube under the desk if you go to the Activision OBGYN Yeah, that's right, and then you put the fucking suction cup Oh, they put them in the crunch locker and then the suction cup just goes Yeah, suck them in the crunch locker and they seal it off for freshness and then you wheel them back over to the desk Yeah, you have to stitch it all back up. Yeah, you got you put the organs back inside
Starting point is 02:28:29 That's right, and then you put the keyboard you get a gamer cube That's right, and you put it around the mom That's right So that see the you know the stuff and the gamer cube and she's got her keyboard and mouse and the monitor in front of her and They scoop that fucking baby out of there, and you don't have to worry about it until crunch time is over Yeah, that's right, and she can keep working on her keyboard and mouse. That's right. That's correct That solves every problem completely You know if you hook your employees up to like all sorts of medical technology
Starting point is 02:28:58 You don't even need to let them take medical leave because it's the healthiest place to be is at work Dump that baby in the fucking you know in In the in the Metacritic pit, and if your game gets it if your game gets at least an 85% Your baby is locked behind Fucking to a glass chamber with the score of the game that you just released Aggregating as the refuse coming And the door has to get to 85 the score has to get to 85 before the door goes You're it's at 84 in the office with your boss being come on, please come on count
Starting point is 02:29:50 Come on call Metacritic and tell him to count the 3d wego score The 3d wego score is like a hundred xboxboyce.nl What about xboxboyce.nl No, no the dual shocker's review is really good Dual shocker's really good Come on dual shocker's got the review in can we all right all right man Baby open door opens up. Oh, no Maristacia review came out. They're coming back. They're coming back
Starting point is 02:30:26 They're got all they're going back in The IGN 3 out of 10 That would be the kind of thing that it's like Jim Sterling returns to reviews and puts all nations children at risk That's what I'm saying. I was like that the IGN 3 out of 10 Fucking comes out and it just cuts the children being ripped out of their parents hands You know like they get it and then they're like wait hold on it drops back to 84 And then they just come in and just grab the kid. There's a note. I can't this is the worst This is the dark future
Starting point is 02:31:07 Someone make a game out of this is really good. This is good stuff. This is free Consume product don't ask questions that is the The most applicable I thought and like Mike screaming endless trash was gonna be the most applicable thing red letter media ever put out but no Fucking J going don't ask questions Just consume product and get excited for next product as the screen grab with the subtitle is the most useful thing red letter media ever made You can use it all the time Speaking of next product. Oh, let's talk about the next product persona 5 Royale first details trailer
Starting point is 02:31:50 New facial expressions new sprites human morgana Gonna try and fuck everything Maybe Futaba's mom He's gonna fuck Futaba's mom cool punch sequence with Queen and and fucking skull. Yeah, new all-out attack shit Product an extra month way excited for product. Yeah Well character might be there's a screenshot that they fucked up and didn't edit something out which looks like might be How do I put this?
Starting point is 02:32:26 Extra sequences with party members. You thought you might not get to play with anymore after parts in the game or before or before Yeah That girl's a rhythmic gymnast, you know, she crushed the dick probably Uh-oh got a photoshop that portrait though. Oh my god. It's the at this is the worst This is the actual worst. It's not but it's not great. It's so it's the worst and it's dumbness It's so dumb Her design isn't that hot. I don't I like not that great. I'm way bigger fan of queen. I think hers is way cooler I agree
Starting point is 02:33:10 Anyway, I like I hope that character. Oh Yeah, I Before we go The redhead I think I hope that she is actually the female main character and that if you play as her then She's not Femsey God damn it. Then the she's a new confidant. Then Akira becomes her spot in the thing. She's she's she's not Femsey All right, you want to talk about consultant a new confidant Takuto Maruki the consultant a new confidant
Starting point is 02:33:46 Part-time school counselor hired at this council had hired at the concern of students following the case of a certain teacher Yeah, dude. Yeah, that is like that fixes that honestly I Fucking applaud it. Hey, what a good idea you kids are fucked up, huh? Yeah, that was this pretty fucked up. What happened at this school like Like that's a nice Like that like we all love the balls of that story a lot. Yeah, and this is a nice little extra Yeah piece of like Realistic detail added to it
Starting point is 02:34:31 So I saw some people talking and like I'm fully in on this idea until I'm proven otherwise And I want him to be like man Don't you want to just like? break the system Do you ever feel constrained by the bounds of infinite authority and just want to go towards a completely individualistic chaos based society Want emancipation? PS. I'm Satan like I
Starting point is 02:35:03 Don't know what it is, but that guy kind of looks like Satan to me. I Like it. I want that dude to be Satan motherfucker wear sandals Can't trust that shit. No I Want a chaos route in this game man? Real chaos route. So yeah, it looks like The golden. Yeah It really looks like the amount of extra shit is overwhelming. It's big It's a whole lot of big the difference between p4 and the p4 golden is would you say?
Starting point is 02:35:38 30% of that game. No, no fucking way 20% maybe 15 I'd I'd take a gamble that this is gonna be around that. Yeah, absolutely Well, I mean how much calendar time is it right? It's like it's it's like three months. I don't know I don't think they've mentioned in golden. It's one month. It's one month. Okay. Okay. Yeah All right, and there's some skipping around and Yeah New product
Starting point is 02:36:10 New product new product. Can we ask questions? Omega Force developed Persona scramble boo You seen this? Yeah Boo, it's not called persona warriors So there's that but it basically is persona warriors. Yeah Boom Really not the right brand for this style of gameplay
Starting point is 02:36:39 Like I don't think this belongs at all doesn't make sense. I don't know Remember when the persona gang fought that horde of monsters Like Zelda sure dragon quest sure Hokuto no Ken sure berserk. Yes Like the pics that they worked with have at least always been Gundam actually was made perfect sense. Yeah, like it's always been up It's always been an IP that like you have you'd expect a hero to be like cleaving through giant crowds in this case It's not the worst stretch in the world like what I think of a personal fight I'm thinking the team versus a boss. Yeah, we exactly opposite of this. Yeah, it just it just doesn't fit
Starting point is 02:37:25 It just doesn't fit. Yeah, also. It's not the fighter. So fuck it. Yeah, exactly This is the wrong spin-off new character. Oh, who gives a shit Sorry if that's a little blunt. Well, yeah, you know remember remember Hyrule warriors, you know, it's always a new character But yes, you're correct We're waiting for the the the s is not the letter we want a is the letter we want R works to R is not the letter we B works to we just battle Q is not the letter we want We want a I
Starting point is 02:38:02 Want a PC port too, but Yeah, don't get that's that's like getting don't push your luck I don't know they're pointing the fucking yakuza games man. Like it's anything's possible. Yeah, but this shit never fucking. What are you what? P4 a and you never got ported. What are you talking about? I want it all. Yeah. No, there's no reason to know how Like let's start with the PlayStation and see where we go from there. How about that they did with yakuza Yeah, how about we get P4 arena and ultimax now? That's too late. It's too late now Well, then I'm saying like if you think that the fight I just want five on the PC The the RPG the original RPG whatever it's do it
Starting point is 02:38:43 You hear that like I mean there's a thing that there's the rumor about like the original five coming to switch While what while the royal comes out? Okay, hold on persona for arena dead come to PC did it Are you serious that I completely miss that that's crazy because I've been going through hoops every time I wanted to play that game, but apparently ultimax did not That's fucking crazy. Are you serious? Oh My god, wow Alt wait ultimax also
Starting point is 02:39:23 What What really by persona for arena on the Microsoft Store I'm looking at it right now That's an Xbox 360 logo available on Xbox one I'm looking for a PC thing here The fuck is what the fuck is people talking about hold on a second hold on a second wikipedia save me
Starting point is 02:39:54 Wikipedia will save me Persona for arena. Oh It's not an official release It's Wikipedia Platforms Arcade PlayStation 3 Xbox 360. What the fuck is the chat talking about? I don't know they lied to me You talk about some emulated shit. They're probably talking about some emulated shit Come out on the PC
Starting point is 02:40:24 Catherine yeah, did that happen? I don't know if any re-releases I don't know the original didn't but I have no idea Catherine fucking chat man Fucking chat. I'm like, why would we go through all this trouble bringing our PlayStation 3s to hotel rooms at cons to get P4a games going Catherine did come out this year on the PC. Okay, so But yeah, I'm like you're like all the trouble we all went through to get games of P4a going in hotel rooms So fucking do it. We could have just ran it on a laptop. Just do it. Just put every game on PC. I don't care All right, just do it No, you can't blame chat. It was one guy. It was one guy. You all are one guy
Starting point is 02:41:08 You're all one. You're all one girl. You're all one person. You're all chat That being said apparently I have a magical ability to only pick out the wrongest people you are Legion You're all you speak for all of you All right All of you take your lumps at once You speak Representative of your people also you all take your victories all at once. So hey, there you go If you're gonna exact if you're gonna if you're gonna bask in the glory of chat, then you got to take the L's as well
Starting point is 02:41:38 Yeah Yeah The important thing is Not to ask any questions about this product Get excited for new product and it's DLC. There's some people that are like Understandably kind of miffed about Royale and it's like it has become like a staple now It's like don't buy persona games on release. I saw that I saw I saw the Twitter reaction And it's like it's it's it is kind of weird now
Starting point is 02:42:08 Where it's like especially for people who speak English because like but I don't like you're being told that the version like that game Did not come out that long ago. No, it wasn't it wasn't that long ago But clearly they're a team that makes a game and then keeps working on it Yeah, and then wants to like perfect it in a way, which is also a very classical Japanese Mentality at the re-release with Final Mix. This is this is the this is the version We are very happy with now that we've gotten public feedback. Yeah, and I think the yeah, it's hard to say like yeah I don't know but there are people that are like I bought this game last week and now the version I have sucks that does suck right and if you're late to the party and the announcement happens that sucks
Starting point is 02:42:51 At the very least I think a decent compromise is an upgrade pack Where you can that's not Up where you can pass and don't do that. I know but I'm saying that I think that'd be the I think that'd be a healthy Yeah, that doesn't even work for this kind of game because what is gonna upgrade halfway through your save and you're gonna miss out all No, your save is fucked. Yeah, you save as far But if you want to see this new content and you care about it, this is what you do. Yeah, I don't know It's fucking that's the that's the only other way. I can see it going down You know why I sure hope they relaxed the fucking streaming bullshit for when that game comes out
Starting point is 02:43:25 If you don't want to be if you don't want to kick early adopters in the balls And you still want to be able to release a better game later Yeah, just allow the people who early adopted to upgrade to that Yeah I think I should have the fighting game though. I think that makes sense. Yeah Yeah Yeah, um fighting games do it. Yeah You know, it'd be a good fighting game to do it percent five arena
Starting point is 02:43:54 That'd be a good game Kingdom Hearts Remind three DLC has been announced. I don't know what this is Do you know what this is? No It's Kingdom Hearts news. I I thought I had to put it on because it would have been like What are you doing not talking about Kingdom Hearts news? Did you not play three? No, I don't give a shit. I thought you gave a shit. I thought I gave a shit, too I'm surprised you don't give a shit. So here's what here's what happened. I played one really enjoyed it like that game
Starting point is 02:44:24 Red is synopsis of Fucking the GBA game because fuck playing that card garbage on the GBA Then I played to love that game Then I played burp by sleep, but I kind of fell off and that was the last time I interacted with this series Kingdom Hearts 3 comes out or he's coming out. I'm like, okay I'll catch up and I got about 10 minutes into the chart of the process of catching up and I go fuck this I Hate this This is the worst
Starting point is 02:44:54 Okay, well if you don't care and I don't care then I'm more than content to talk about PlayStation 5 details. Hey Well, we were gonna talk about this no matter what Cerny saying all sorts of stupid shit in this interview that I don't understand. I think the most important one Actually is the follow-up story So we'll just do both at once. Yeah, do the big the big there. There's a whole lot of Not much but one one major point with the ps5 that we're hearing is solid-state Society So yeah, that's good SSD drives good and they demonstrated its usage by showing you that you can they loaded up a build of Spider-Man
Starting point is 02:45:36 that was running on PS4 and then a PS5 one and they more or less demonstrated that you can do the fast travel Instantly, yeah on the map from one spot to the other So and that's effectively what your hard drive does when you have an SSD running pretty much SSD unless the game hasn't been programmed to take advantage of it Yeah, and of course the thing though is I mean unless the technology has since like surpassed what I know of it But whatever you have an SSD drive, that's your OS operate. That's your operating system drive And it's always smaller than your crazy multi-terabyte. Yeah SSD
Starting point is 02:46:10 Right and read shit has gotten way better in recent times But do they have them at in like the terabytes? Oh, yeah, like okay. Yeah, all right cool You're not gonna get a terabyte drive with this. No fucking way I think like you're gonna fucking you tell me there's like an eight terabyte SSD drive that you're gonna fucking know you're gonna get a 320 gig SSD drive with this and you're gonna enjoy it you bitch Cuz that's what you're gonna get that like even if this Comes out two years from now that would still be insanely expensive. I think the worst part about this whole story anything above four
Starting point is 02:46:46 Yeah, is gonna be crazy. Yeah, I Think the worst part about this story is certainly like yeah, and this thing's gonna support 8k graphics and Then the the note is like there are no 8k TVs that are for general populace, right 8k is fucking stupid Also, how big are your games gonna be? Really big that's not good. Yeah big like if we keep scaling up, but the end result is you still only get four games Like that sucks, man, but anyway the follow-up was that the ps5 itself
Starting point is 02:47:21 Will not launch over the next 12 months, so They're really on shocking. This is not happening in between now and 2020. Yeah, I expected this So I mean that makes sense I think That's fine for them to talk about yeah, I think we're probably gonna see I Don't know what we're gonna see Microsoft do actually You think they're gonna swerve. I don't know they might swerve. I feel like they could release the Xbox What are we at now? What's the what's the big one X bone X? I mean at this point you gotta just find a new don't release the X boners, and that'll be a
Starting point is 02:48:08 Juiced up X bone X X box one Oh Revision special Yeah, whatever and that will be an applicable power jump, but it'll still be the same thing So it'll still be like backwards compatible Xbox one revolution s. Yeah, there you go. Yeah This that I really this I desperately hope this thing is backwards compatible man like what five yeah, it is they said it They said it. Yes. Oh, did you okay in case you didn't actually take a look at the article? I skimmed it, but I didn't get the part of the backwards compatible. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, 100% 100%
Starting point is 02:48:44 What we got is with four only we got hold on. Let me scroll to get it scroll scroll scroll scroll scroll scrollie scrollie scrollie Yeah, they confirmed backwards compatibility they confirmed solid-state with backwards compatible with ps4. Yes, and Ray tracing as well Which has been a PC thing for a while, but Where was the actual I Would really like a let's PlayStation as we as you joked earlier. Yes, that's it and it's not in the headline, but Then but they did imply that VR is gonna be a much bigger part of it this time as well. I bet so
Starting point is 02:49:36 Yeah, your ps4 library will continue to exist on your ps5. Does this mean we can get blood-borne at 60? Come on. I Think a re-release No, just make it so the games run better. We got Dark Souls on switch. They might they might just do it They might just re-release it. Don't know just make it so games run better Microsoft did it Just do it It depends on how the game was made. I don't care
Starting point is 02:50:07 Well crunch him until it happened Well, well then you might as well re-release that You're putting dev time into a specific title. No, no dev time Microsoft did it Pat is going full big baby now, but reason and rational thought process Hey, can I call you thin blood from now on? Where did you hear that? I'm asking because it might be applicable. All right, sure
Starting point is 02:50:47 Vampire the masquerade. Hey, I know a little bit about this nerd shit now. What do you think of how this game looks? I'll let you know in a second. Oh really? Okay. Well, they have a My sleep has been so fucked like okay Well, they're showing off some trailers and teasers. They're showing a gameplay yet Not really they're just showing off this kind of art style in and it's a cutscene thing So we don't actually know So the the main character in Bloodlines 2 is going to be a thin blood Which is are you familiar with that term? Wolves? I mean in my own head. Yeah, okay, so thin bloods are
Starting point is 02:51:27 I believe it's 14th So vampires are defined by generations in this fiction So how the first generation is Kane of Kane and able the purest of pure three generations three and four ish are Anti-diluvians prior to Noah which are basically God-like super beings and apparently don't exist, but they exist shut up and your your badass vampires are eighth generation ish and then once you get down to generation 14 Right You get what's a thin blood or a kative and these are vampires
Starting point is 02:52:06 That get the raw steel ever because it's a power gap every every child of a vampire is shittier than the last one You get no power-ups, but the Sun hurts you you get zero powers Every vampiric weakness Yes, okay, okay, right? Yeah. Yep Like it is the shittiest deal ever. Yeah You get weakness to sunlight We like all the bird all the fire shit like all that no healing ability No powers like blood lusts like
Starting point is 02:52:42 Considering how insane the 10th generation sons of sparta. Oh, they do live forever though. Okay. That's all right. Ah, that's good But they get all the shit 10th generation sons of sparta will be gods Yeah, eventually if they can figure out how to do their shit before they get old and die Like it it no question That's a raw deal. Yeah, it sucks So the the they're a focus in vampire the masquerade bloodlines where they're like just everyone shits all over They're also the the dirt hobos of vampire society like everybody hates them man like shit All he wanted to do is grill some veggies. I know what's the big deal?
Starting point is 02:53:22 No, like grilled veggies. They're delicious. I do like a grilled veggie, right? The little burn on your on your green makes it taste better And you fucking throw that on your side Put some put some spice on it Delicious What the fuck are you talking about Kane Kane Kane Can't able Kane and able just wanted to grill some veggies. Is that what the fight was over solid was man Really? Yeah, that's why Kane hit able with a rock. Able was Babel wanted to barbecue his lamb
Starting point is 02:53:55 He wanted some shank. Okay. God likes lamb shanks. All right. Yeah, real big fan of Yeah, and Kane was like yo, bro. I work in the garden. Yeah, I toil I do my I do my fucking greens your Shepherd you've got meat. Yeah, that's right. So when it comes time to sacrifice your shit It's gonna be meat because that's what you do. Yeah, but Kane's like my thing is vegetables, sir So I'm a grill some fucking delicious veggies. He brings the meat. I bring the veggies He got yourself a stew going right God's like fuck you. I wanted meat. Fuck your veggies You don't get that blessing. All right. Able gets the blessing because he brought the meat
Starting point is 02:54:39 Mm-hmm Then Kane hits Able over the head of the rock Yeah, cuz fuck that guy and then meets Lilith and that shit happens. Yeah God says I'm gonna curse you to have to eat your children. Yeah, well, you know and That's vampires. Why are you kicking him out for you for his nice brave grilled veggies, man? I love grilled veggies It's fucking great The meats nice is the blood sucking now like an ironic anti-vegan statement by God I mean quite friends like what are you gonna? What are you gonna fucking?
Starting point is 02:55:09 You're gonna say thank you to the man that brought the meat, obviously Yeah, the guy that brought the sides can't even fucking get a little you can't get a little some something You're saying vampirism was caused by God being a picket eater I mean quite like just hating like, you know, and like no one likes a really an asshole vegan like no one really That's all if you're really enforcing it if you're trying to push it down people's throats and yeah, no one likes that No, but yeah, but he knew that his brother had the meat covered. Yeah, they got a fucking You make a responsible fucking guest show up with the sides that nobody brought to make a full plate Grilled veggies the solid was about
Starting point is 02:55:49 And now we got fucking vampires. Yeah That's it so the basic deal is that the main the only way for thin bloods to get any any beef here mm-hmm from their shit state is To do something called Dioblory, which is basically to eat other tougher vampire souls Which is a no-no in vampire society people don't like it But that's gonna be your deal So how do they like continue to exist? which Wait, hold on hold on hold on. Sorry. How does who continue to exist the thin bloods? Yeah, they live forever. That's right naturally. Yeah
Starting point is 02:56:32 They gotta eat blood though, but they have to eat blood. Yeah, they got they got the blood thing It doesn't matter what the source of the blood is. No, it's got to be humans. Okay Rats give like an animals livestock that kind of thing. Yeah, like they're one one hundredth of a human But they get no powers. No and also Human blood ranges in quality. So you got your dirty hobo blood. Yeah You got your rich at a yuppie blood. Yeah, then you got your typo. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah typo delicious shit, but what if okay, can you be can you be murdered? Through traditional human means. Oh
Starting point is 02:57:10 Yeah, that's one of the things in vampire is that vampires have are extraordinarily amazing healing abilities. Yeah But a shotgun will take your head off just like anybody else's okay. So if you're so if you're a thin blood, but you're tough, right? but if you're like pulverized into fucking mush, yeah, and like See, but if you're a vampire and you get hit by a car thrown out a window, you're fine. Yeah, you'll you'll walk it off You're if you're a thin blood you won't yeah Okay
Starting point is 02:57:43 Okay, and then there's ghouls, which is people that eat human eat vampire blood, but aren't vampires Oh, yeah ghouls. They're they're here. Goals and freaks Probably the most interesting thing I ever heard about the vampire the masquerade like fiction that is not referenced in the games is that Vampires take aggravated damage from fire right fires good against vampires. It's a pretty common thing But that in the pen and paper apparently You take so much damage from fire that vampires gain and innate crippling phobia of open flame Oh nice to the point where if somebody is smoking a cigarette in their vicinity They have to roll up check to not have a panic attack. Wow
Starting point is 02:58:24 Like Gregor click yeah, cuz like somebody putting out a cigarette on them could like Fucking ice them or like really fuck up their shit What happens to people they get bit by thin bloods? They bleed Okay Get it becoming a van so the vampire thing is Like it's always been complicated. It's not zombie rules. It's never been zombie rules Vampires don't bite people and then they become vampires the usual way they become a vampire is you got to have
Starting point is 02:58:58 Nearly or mostly you your whole blood sucked out of your body Yes, and I'm not Gregor and then you're and then you're then the then the vampires got a jam their own blood in there And so you kind of die, but then you come to back to life as a vampire Because it sounds like blood mixing. Yeah, I was gonna say like getting bit sounds like a much worse deal than just being born part But then this shit sounds pretty awful, too. Yeah, and then depending on your fiction. You got people that get born vampires. Yeah What about day walkers? Are there day walkers? No But apparently you can spec your stats into like physical fortitude and then you can tank a certain amount of sunlight
Starting point is 02:59:39 Hmm, but like You're still gonna there's like smoke. You're gonna. I think the upper limit is like a cup like a minute You know you need a Vulcan Raven sized container of sunscreen. Oh, you know this but the Sun is just a really big flame Yeah, it's really big. Yeah So big it's very angry. Yeah It's also a terrible stand It's just terrible almost beat him though It's so bad that it causes your main characters to laugh
Starting point is 03:00:12 Hysterically to the point of insanity. Yeah, and even the even the most out-of-character way All right big nerd in the chat pointed out that apparently if you're an old enough vampire you can take like Fucking UV laser beams to the face and just tank it right because you're old and vampire power scales with old hmm That's cool. Vampires are cool Well, unless they're fucking lame depends on which kind right because you can you can do you you can be a brand stoker type Or you can be a fucking twilight type. Well, that's the whole point of Vampire the masquerade is it predates twilight? Obviously, but the whole idea is they have all those clans and every clan is some Variation of vampire. Mm-hmm. So you brand stoker type. So you're like ventrue. Yeah, unfortunately, that's also underworld
Starting point is 03:01:03 you're Mm-hmm Kate Beckinsale was pretty hot back and sale war tights. Yeah Vampire raw All right, let's get the fuck away from this conversation So it turns out I like that first movie on the fuck you. I liked it. Fuck you vampire fuck off movie Wow, well down blue guy at the end and you're like Jesus Christ, holy shit
Starting point is 03:01:37 Taste is trash. Oh, yeah. No. Yeah. Do you think I didn't know was trash? You think I'm sitting there going. Oh, yeah, they fucking break the rules of War 101, which is don't break the fucking line of action You have the fucking you literally have two armies on each side. Don't switch the side So switch it fuck it you fucking have everybody literally just stop the big dumb black monster thing walks out Oh, man, everyone gets really confused and just walks away. What's the trailer for that play? Holy shit the hybrid The fucking hybrid the hybrid the hybrid it shows up and gets its ass be oh man Do you remember I watched the fucking behind the scenes for that where they tried like a bunch of different?
Starting point is 03:02:22 Prototype hybrids and then they ran out of time shooting so they're like fuck it just cover in blue just coat him Just coat it wasn't blue was black. It was blue was a blue fucking blue I remember it being so dark fucking bad, dude They originally wanted to do this rig where they had a bunch of hair on him and they Fired electrodes and would stand up so he'd look like a creepy vampire werewolf and they could never get the shit to work Shit, so they just said fuck throw fucking blue paint on him. Fuck it Fear the hybrid fear the hybrid he gets he goes through a fucking table. Yeah, he gets he looks like it's chokesland But yeah, like a fucking 90 year old man
Starting point is 03:03:00 They just it's straight up a wrestling match like this big new right like the shockmaster comes out supposed to get over Then he gets put through a fucking table out or in a chair They can't back self cuts the guy's head is the matrix moment his head slices off. You're like, oh man Huge fucking bitch. Oh, I can't wait for ten sequels And then we just stand around and then awkwardly walk away as the camera zooms out sadly Stating to black fucking super smurf Kate Beckinsale. Yeah, fuck out of here Hey, there's a new mode in Overwatch. Yeah, is it for pornography customized game modes? All right, so pornography On the ptr
Starting point is 03:03:40 They're basically putting in pornography test for all that thing that I remember halo having where you can create a create Customer game mode. That's right. It's not a map editor But it lets you modify You can add rules and scripts. I bet you can Yeah, that shit's everywhere man. Yeah, it's crazy Like people that are just trying to watch normal porn that have no interest in video games whatsoever Have seen various SFM gifts, it's
Starting point is 03:04:17 And it's kind of wild the funniest thing that they have no idea what they're looking at but it's everywhere The funniest thing is like people making fun of the porn ads that are what is it? It's like it's fucking don't play this by yourself in five minutes or whatever And it's like every single one is to overwatch characters and it's like Jesus Christ Like the weirdest like what is your point of your eye? Don't click here or you'll just like Like what do you aim away from your face before you click on this shit? You have five seconds. You won't survive it. Don't click
Starting point is 03:04:57 Make sure your mom's out of the room loser What is your plan like what like what are you trying to get you're done here? Make sure you're by yourself when you play this porn game and you jerk off. Yeah Really? You think? Your dog won't look at you the same after you click here Anyway Yeah, so it's a custom mode. Yeah, you can customize the rules in the script. I feel like everyone in the world
Starting point is 03:05:37 Fell off of overwatch They did but every time a new character gets announced. There's there's a little bit of like oh shit What's this about? Are you like a hot Frenchman? I? feel like I Feel like the most I feel like the fact the most exciting thing people are talking about with Blizzard is a Re-release of the a good version of their MMO from 2004 is like the most depressing thing in the universe Wow classic is all I hear people talking about I haven't heard regards to Blizzard haven't heard is that what's up? Yeah, man, people are excited for while classic because it's a version of wow that they enjoy playing
Starting point is 03:06:14 But do people actually want to go back? Yes Yes, really I have played on a private It's fun Yes, wow That's the name of the game wow wow wow wow. It's the database I Know why even bother heard this I mean what is it? What are you doing? You don't give a shit, but I think it's pretty cool I what I give a shit about I'll try Starlink has the Star Fox character
Starting point is 03:06:53 shit coming out Very soon if that sounds really cool you give a shit tomorrow in fact wow is When you're going to get Slippy Falco and Peppy the other one Talking to humans in a weird way. Yeah, don't worry about it That's really interesting for the Star Fox racing content and and what not with the Starlink shit
Starting point is 03:07:22 And you get to remember it's the game where you put the toys on the controller. Yeah, that done bullshit. Yeah, yeah So that's all coming out. That's so cool so Star Fox's Continue to they both have star in the title continues to exist through Starlink. What a awesome use of Star Fox As opposed to Star Fox, yeah, that wasn't a good use of Star Fox not that other that not that one or The other one before it or the other one before it
Starting point is 03:07:58 It's Really weird cuz it's not that hard or or Christ the past four Star Fox games man everything post 64. Yeah, is that what you're saying? Zero battle was battle assault whatever assault the salt was alright. Yeah, but it's not surface for no, but it was alright The fucking the the the fucking DS one where you've dragged the shit with the touch command That was command do whatever and then the adventures Star Fox adventures. Yeah, I Think
Starting point is 03:08:33 It's like the simplest fucking thing in the world is a victim of Nintendo thinking that it needs to be something more than what it is Yeah, like I really think they're just they would not be content to just release a straight up behind the ship shooter With levels and stages a ton of levels. Yeah done. I think I think they're not happy with that They want it to be like it's one of the greatest star versus for the best games ever made They want to end they want it to innovate something and it doesn't need to but they just they want it to be more so they keep trying to do other things with it and Yeah, we kind of just want hey Star Fox 2 came out
Starting point is 03:09:11 Yeah, it did this weird that's weird that That's weird man Let's take some mail. Hey if you want to send an email in It'll probably be on a higher energy level than it is right now and we'll read it maybe and then you send that to Castle super beast mail at gmail.com that's castle super beast mail at gmail.com We got one coming in fucking dying out here, man, I'm fucking From to and I'm stupid right now says hey padlock and will again good enough You're talking about conspiracy theories reminded me that
Starting point is 03:10:05 You okay Just look down the chat and just saw somebody just go Pat you're fucked. Oh my god Uh You're talking about conspiracy theories remind me of the time that I was having dinner with my grandparents and Distant aunt informed me of an insane theory of hers She believes that clouds are created by airplanes flying by shut up because when she was living in Hawaii There were no clouds ever and there were no planes flying overhead But when she moved back to the in the US she was appalled by all the clouds and all the planes everywhere
Starting point is 03:10:41 She was appalled by the clouds How are you supposed to talk to them if they still like they're still a human being after hearing them say something like this This is a grandparent. This is an aunt aunt. Yeah You can't just put them in a home I Mean at no point does she specify what she thinks the clouds are doing if they're doing anything So I guess it's fine. I feel like whenever I encounter that situation. I just stare at the person until the conversation moves away I would yeah, you pull up the Simpsons photo and you literally show them old man yells Wait, does this person think the clouds did not exist before the invention of airplanes
Starting point is 03:11:28 Yes, because they grew up on an island where there were no clouds. I Know I know that's not true my skybox There literally cannot be a location on the planet that has zero clouds ever my skybox was always clean blue skies So when I move somewhere else It's gotta be That reminds me of that percentage of people in certain like US states that don't believe that snow is real Yeah, right. I've never seen it ain't real to me. Oh my god, man Yeah, that's fine. That's a large-scale fucking
Starting point is 03:12:12 Conspiracy the age of information they call it Let's see here We got what coming in from Dilly Dally says hello unregulated doses of chemicals in my brain as a person who has both mental and physical disabilities I find games to be fun and unique showcase of attempts at inclusion in minority groups. I present you a list of things I've noticed over the years that I'd like to ask your thoughts on them I'm very interested in rebindable inputs and configs for those who have physical impediments Might not have been the intended design decades ago
Starting point is 03:12:45 But is how all games should be can lead to fun exploits in modern games though Integration of sound design into the game subtitles Alaleff for dead where it's tied to core mechanics of the gameplay and might possibly possibly be the most enjoyable version of this Visual indicators of things that would be giving haptic feedback like spotting an enemy or a hidden secret instead of just a sound and vibration Looking at you massive amounts of older jarred RPGs with hidden prompts for no reason other than to force you to enjoy the environment While you search for hidden materia or dropped plot key Ability to turn hints on for single-player games in case it's a bit too mentally challenging for you Or you're completely missing the scope of the scenario
Starting point is 03:13:26 Actually, I will roll easy mode into this as it sometimes is the only way for my friends to enjoy a game as it sets massive OCD off for them and The inclusion of color blindness features shifts and of the palette colors To not need those features even turned on for example in multiplayer games where enemies are always Always have a unique and distinct design regardless of color Mono audio plus radar for those who with hearing loss and an impediment for one or both ears That's all I can think of at the moment the vast majority of accessibility Concern and design decisions that you could make for your game will also benefit those without any disabilities
Starting point is 03:14:07 Subtitle design the including closed captioning. I Use that shit. I don't have a hearing issue. There you go, right? The number one like like the golden rule on that is adjustable keybinds Like the ability to change your controls while pseudo vital for people with certain physical disabilities is Just nice to have for everybody else. Mm-hmm. Like that's a feature that just is good Overall, yeah, it kind of sucks that respawn games for controller bindings
Starting point is 03:14:43 They don't let you do what you want. They force you to use presets Yeah, they let you bind keys on your keyboard and on your mouse But your controller is stuck in a couple of preset configurations, and I hate it They don't want dumb controller players to fuck up their controls and not be able to fix them I think that is the actual design idea of a litter like fuck off Just do the same thing your keyboard does. No, I don't wanna Yeah Colorblind this shit
Starting point is 03:15:11 While that obviously doesn't help people or you know, that's not a feature that like transfers over to the non colorblind people There are a shit ton of colorblind people. Oh, yeah, it is super common. Yeah a lot of people I Mean I grew up I've I've known for I think Apparently it's weirdly common in video game circles I've known for people
Starting point is 03:15:40 Men of who's the latest With that. Oh man, that's color. Men scarblind. What what type? I don't know you have to ask him because there's like 10 now You'd have to ask him, but there's settings for them. Yeah, and you can cycle through them in the apex. Mm-hmm So that's pretty handy. I Find the I find colorblind settings completely fascinating when I fuck with them because I'm like, oh, that's oh, huh? Yeah, there's a certain perspective that you gain. Yeah, it's like when you see like dog vision Yeah, and you go man. You look and everything looks like dogs. Wow
Starting point is 03:16:11 Think about it fucking dogs can't tell shit dogs can't tell shit if it wasn't for that nose They'd be garbage. Yeah. Well, their nose is more accurate than our eyes. So it's weird If it wasn't for that nose, they'd be garbage well not for our thumbs we'd be garbage, too I know we'd be all right with the four What be all right with the na man without the pre-enceled thumbs haven't even watching tears there's human videos No, the ability to throw shit is our number one super. Oh, it's awesome But I mean we like with just the clawing though. We'd be pretty fucking we would be all right She can't throw something you throw a fucking you can't throw a stick without your thumb
Starting point is 03:16:52 But I mean in terms of like what we can and can't do in general like like we wouldn't be like Completely worthless. Yeah, we would be super garbage, man. I Gotta get tears you on this with you with thumbless humans. Hold on a second. Are you strictly talking about like? Pre-early human evolution. I'm talking all we're talking about right now. Okay. All right fine. Never mind I'm talking. I was talking about right now. Oh like if we lost our if we all lost our thumbs Well, I mean, yeah, dude. We'd be okay. We already built the fucking first tools of shit Yeah, and you can't fucking kill a woolly mammoth with a fucking stick you got no thumbs man But at the same time, I think we might have developed like
Starting point is 03:17:36 Depends. I don't know. It's hard to say we you don't think we'd be smart enough to come up with a thumbless way to like no Intelligence follows tool use in some cases Dumb as fuck dolphins are smarter shit us man You pick back in the day anyway Can you hold something in your not thumb and oh that sucks and smash you get no strength on that like can I pick up this mouse for example without my thumb and like Bash someone not effectively and in fact you can look at chimpanzees and shit like that because they their thumbs are garbage But they're like a hundred times stronger than us
Starting point is 03:18:12 But they're bad at throwing shit and hitting you with sticks or taking both of my hands and picking something up So I have two hands on it and then just bashing someone in the head with it Well, I'll tell you what you can pick up a rock and hit me with it without using your thumb and I'm not too worried about it And then I'll hit you with a rock using my thumb. I think thumbs are super important I don't think getting rid of them is the difference between us not existing. I think that's totally insane I think you're underestimating the power of your thumb. I think so I think I'm just making shit up because I don't actually know the answer and it sounds it sounds plausible to you Sounds plausible to me and we know that you'll make the right decision about thumbs in the in the future. Hmm
Starting point is 03:18:53 Well that cult shit went way out of control. Yeah, I don't know and I'm like one discussion about it. Yeah, it got real Way far. Yeah, what way far well these cult sucks. Don't come on Posted by the fucking the cult of Pat people. Yeah, the sticker on it. Come on We know you'll make the right decision fuck off burn all down anyway We're doing emails, right? We were Now you need the Virgin Woolly the Chad Pat I have literally you see that I have literally seen you walk in the fucking virgin position Yeah, yeah, I have literally seen you do the shoulders up slump pose and I have literally done
Starting point is 03:19:45 Yeah, I know this like It's life. What can I say? Like I have unironically done this pose can I get a chat in the middle of a dance move Can I get a Chad cube thing in the middle of a dance floor while shit while music was bopping? I have unironically made that pose. Yeah, I have the confidence to never do that Like I've literally I don't want to destroy everyone with me doing the Chad pose. Oh, that's fucking great What was your favorite leak of all time Tom wants to know that halo 3-1 in the fucking weird barn. Do you remember that shit? Oh with the TV screen?
Starting point is 03:20:30 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that was great. That was solid I'm gonna go ahead and say now currently fucking devil may cry 5 With the dude Straight up saying to the camera. Oh shit, you can see me in the reflection And then he keeps playing and then he gets fired That's that's my number one. Oh man Justin wants to know you bully. What's that yellow Batman looking album behind you?
Starting point is 03:21:10 It's been bugging me for months and my searches. I haven't gotten good results It's a literal Batman the animated series soundtrack Smooth Cool Batman the animated series vinyl it's pretty dope I want to show it to you because it looks really cool for the wreck for the audio only people It's imaginable is playing out of vinyl. It is the shape of a bat It's cool
Starting point is 03:21:42 There you go. Look at Batman the animated series vinyl. What's up? I don't stand final records You know what I found out a friend of mine came over this week that collects them as well and explained that Apparently 30% of people currently buying vinyl don't have record players. Yeah, that shit's wild I didn't know that so I thought I understood vinyl records right up until you held up that Batman shaped one I'm like, but how does it go over the track if there's no track to go over? Have you not seen the drift stage vinyl now, man? The drift stage one Which is right here records or circles man? So records or circles
Starting point is 03:22:19 Drift stage has an official vinyl. Oh my this is good This is a good way to do this and the record itself is a good way to do this is Literally the car wait, that's the drift say the car is the vinyl record That's pretty good, and it spins on the fucking thing like this is that's silly. Yeah, that's silly So you can make them any fucking shape you want as long as the grooves exist I don't get it if you go look this up audio listeners. Just look up the drift stage vinyl record I don't understand and you'll see what I'm talking about As long as it can fit and spin and there's little grooves on the thing then you can do whatever you want with it
Starting point is 03:23:02 They can't stop you I get you know what? You can't stop you now that you destroyed your mouse all the juicy bits fell out Mice are awesome because you can pull a battery out and they still work Yeah, that I feel that's new and by new I mean like sub the past ten years because I remember You nudging those batteries and the fucking thing would turn off And let's take one last one one last one Coming in from the spice must flow they must dude a super castle mind goblins After you talk about swords in video games versus real life
Starting point is 03:23:40 I wanted to insert my own two cents to that subject. Let's hit it I am currently a long-sword instructor of bloke in plow Western martial arts fucking sick for real I Teach German longsword in the tradition of Kunst des Fetchens as Interpreted from a poem called the Zettel purposely written by a sword master named Johannes likes This is taught in the context we assume of doing blush fletching unarmored fencing That means typically guys would be wearing gambesons
Starting point is 03:24:20 Leather gloves and no helmet. Uh-huh. Keep in mind gambesons are still armor. Just not plate, right? the type of fighting that would be How much to vexed in are those styles of fighting that are very different from each other When fighting with a longsword as you alluded to you can't cut plate. Is it happening? Seeing that in games and movies makes me roll my eyes ridiculous normal tactics against plate would be to use a pole arm Hallbird poleaxe Lucerne, etc. You forgot to say foe shard you motherfucker And destroy a man inside the plate If you got a hammer I'll do it if you don't have that you use a spear to go for the unarmored gaps between the plate and stab
Starting point is 03:25:02 Yeah, the armpits the knees shit like that. They're dick. This is why There is that half-sorting style for longswords where you turn the sword into a small smear spear And use your hand to guide the blade with more control to thrust into the dangerous spot Most times though the fighting goes to wrestling and you try to get the other guy with a dagger Yeah, I remember watching videos of dudes doing shit like this And it turns into wrestling and then they start beating on them in the head And then they pull out a little knife and go through the islet and that's fucking bad way to go No, but if we're talking about swords and how sharp they were they were super sharp
Starting point is 03:25:39 You absolutely do not want to dull blade because most people do not own plate in any form They're gonna be wearing gambasins. So if you do not have a very sharp sword you aren't getting through that gambasin Gambasins are also very good at dissipating blunt damage not to mention swords are not designed for blunt trauma Clubs and hammers are swords are meant for cutting obvious is obvious So the idea that someone thinks a medieval sword was intentionally dull is ludicrous So there you go, yeah The irony right so the only the richest Richie bitches would have plate right which would make them like nigh invincible to cutting
Starting point is 03:26:18 Otherwise you're fighting leather. Otherwise you're fighting leather at leather, which is not Invincible to cutting but it's actually because it's you know, cow flesh or whatever dissipates blood damage more equally Isn't that crazy? So depending on the richness of the person you're fighting you want to go blunter and blunter as the money go up Considering how cool half-sorting looks and how much it mattered. I'm surprised that My first exposure to it was for honor. Yep You'd think pop culture would have adapted that sometimes sooner, but well, I mean look at the way like probably the if I remember Correctly, I'm probably wrong, but like the number one pop culture thing that has always been complete bullshit from step one is the way swords clash
Starting point is 03:27:09 Which is they clash edge on? Right mm-hmm, which is like if two big dudes Through their swords at each other of historical accuracy. There's a good chance that both of the swords are gonna just fly into pieces You would you would parry when you parry you parry with the flat. I Might have don't parry with that edge. What the fuck would you parry with the edge? I might have read an unverified post or Comment somewhere where someone was describing with questionable accuracy that That Katana's
Starting point is 03:27:46 We're good for one battle at a time before needing to be Re sharp fancy sword and refolded in some cases Katana's are made out of fucking slag metal for fuck's sake So there's yeah The only way to get them that good was because of how shit the metal was and yet the multi folding was because of how impure and The idea was that like because of how thin and so on that you'd pretty much fight to fight have to go back and Have to go back in and fuck you know what the best weapon of all time across all history is a stick Best the spear is the most useful weapon ever Every variation of the spear is the better stick
Starting point is 03:28:30 I'll take a stick with a thing on it. That's just a stick. It's a good stick But it's just a better stick Way bigger fan of the of the stick with the thing on it. You know what a gun is it's a stick that move It's a fucked up looking stick, but it's just a stick. Well, it's a stick that throws. Yeah, it throws that stick part mm-hmm We're good at that Yeah Piercing damage is the best damage
Starting point is 03:29:03 Against what Another person An animal much everything really Hmm. No, I can't think of a single thing that piercing damages and the best damage Is there anything so armored that you have to crack it or go blunt No, because if you can find the piercy point that would still be there and if it fails Yeah, all I'll say is you've got to pierce it harder like if you have to fight Yeah, it's a skeleton would be pretty worthless to pierce. Yeah, but skeletons aren't real. I've never seen one. You don't have it
Starting point is 03:29:38 It's a myth You'd have to beat a skeleton without piercing listen if clouds can get fucking created by airplanes and skeletons aren't real See, I was gonna say crocodile Yeah, but then I thought if the crocodile opened its mouth and you pierced it that'd be the best way to do it I remember correctly the best way to kill a crocodile stab it through the top of the head But the leather it's actually not the leather that's problems their skull is super thick apparently They're so fucking hard. How would you pierce anything with that? You have big man arms and you're from Australia No, I I I feel like that would be really hard to do
Starting point is 03:30:14 Yeah, I imagine stabbing it in the open mouth would be a better job. Yeah, you want to put your fucking arm. No, yeah No, no, you but you but if your stick is long enough. No, you get your dude They will snap that stick in a second they will but Maybe you can stab it first. I don't know. It's hard to say. I don't have any I have no idea how to kill it I have a look I have watched people talk about how they killed a crocodile Blinded it and then figure it out. Well, they don't have a good eyesight anyway, so you don't actually have to worry about that at all Stab it in the eye. Yeah, but you have to get close enough to stab it in the eye
Starting point is 03:30:53 I don't know and what if they start fucking doing the role on you I have a really good plan to kill crocodiles. Okay? Alligator crocodiles are works. Well, you changed it. You said crocodile, but it's a bit of a crocodile's a little small tiny Okay, so look you see that you see the alligator. Yeah fucking turn around and run away. Yeah Alligator you can't see it anymore. It'll die eventually. Uh-huh You ever see you ever seen an alligator moving across land chasing something down? No, I've not Good fucking luck dude Look to the alligator turn 360 degrees walk away. That's the alligator 360 good fucking like that Microsoft
Starting point is 03:31:36 Oh, are the crocs the same size might be the shittiest joke I've ever made I Put that on you. I didn't know the crocs were the same size I remember my stupid kids book showed me a picture of an alligator and it showed a picture of a crocodile and it Specifically put them side by side and it made it look as if it was smaller In fact, I think I have that kids book right down there. I really I think it's literally on my shelf I could probably pull the page up and show you There's a lot of people that are like 360 would keep you facing the alligator. I'm like, oh, you don't remember this ancient meme from 12 years ago Sorry children. Hmm
Starting point is 03:32:14 Take that my mistake Well, what do you think I spoke I saw somebody tell me that memes are being taught in their marketing classes in university. Oh Yeah, I believe that if you can effectively get one out there then This means we're like two steps away from know your meme becoming an accredited university Well, I remember like I fucking turned on I opened up Twitter one day and I saw the top moment and it wasn't marked as promotion but the top moment was like rank this box of
Starting point is 03:32:51 Frito's laze chip products Yeah from top to bottom. Yeah, and I was like what the fuck are you doing acting like this is not an ad as various people all argued with each other and it seems like there was enough footage of like Paid people doing it that it worked and got people that were like randomly Joining in and it was one of these weird things where I'm like, you're supposed to mark This is promotion and then they didn't and it was like, okay, so this is where we're at now Right and and there's been a couple of the things like that where you're like This is obviously an ad but there's no actual connection to the company that you can prove it
Starting point is 03:33:33 but Memes Thousand percent you bet your ass they're pushing a bunch of those out there trying to see what let's sticks and what doesn't How many times is a company probably posted on 4chan trying to see if they could get something going and then it doesn't take off That's where the RB sweater like finds their trends. I buy fuck. I fucking believe it This is a fucking weird world we live in Where are the eyeballs? Or are they looking are they on the memes they're on the memes let's put some some ads over where those memes are okay?
Starting point is 03:34:10 Hey me hey Snoop Dogg, you know seem to know about memes What do we mean to get the eyeballs? Read now anime. All right. Got it now or two on the plane. Oh my god. What oh play mortal combat Shit fucking Naruto memes for Goddamn it. All right. This sucks. This future sucks and with that That's a podcast well. We got to do this. So let's officially start the endgame spoiler cast If you don't want to hear spoilers for Avengers Endgame, you should tune out now
Starting point is 03:34:50 That was the most fun I've had watching an Avengers movie Since the original movie. Yeah, that's right. I Think I could sum that movie up in man. I clapped when the thing happened Because that's the whole movie That's the whole movie is the thing happened the fact that three hours With like the all the all the like here's the place where you can go to the bathroom And those were all part of places where one I was debating because I'm like no You were saying at the San Francisco scene
Starting point is 03:35:24 But that's literally the introduction of Ant-Man who turns out to be super prop very important So that's a silly place to take a break and second nothing in the last half of the movie lets you get up and walk out So so there really is just no break points I guess I only have a couple things I really want to say and they're about they're not about the movies good I liked it. Yes, but The movies structure and the way that it got made is way more interesting to me This is a movie. They're like we're just gonna We're all gonna just pretend that every single person who ever watches Avengers Endgame
Starting point is 03:36:01 Saw all 21 lead-up movies because we don't have time to do shit Well, but I'll explain this is the most justified fuck you if you showed up expecting this to be your first It is wild there. I don't think the majority of actors in that film are even named. I Don't like no no no no like I'm not one of those people But in this instance, I would absolutely be the person to yell at you if you're like can I just skip all the rest and Watch this one. Yeah, like if you actually show up Trying to go like I want to get on the hype train with this is my first fucking Like go fuck yourself. You're a moron. I can't I can't deal with that
Starting point is 03:36:50 like do they I Think they say rocket once Right, like that There is no like despite being a three-hour movie. They're dealing with so many moving pieces There is literally no time at all Like so we cut to Hulk on the bed on the fucking rooftop with Tilda Swinton Who is that shut up? You remember her from her movie, right? Good moving on so first off
Starting point is 03:37:23 The fact that they handled this movie in the way they did meant that they got to do two things that are awesome Right, you know the thing we love when you expect a big battle But instead it's just a fucking blowout. Yeah, when they show up and find Faddles on the farm and kill them in two seconds just Shit like nothing. I was like, whoa, like literally Thor just goes fuck you cuts his head off You're like, oh, oh my god. Okay, um We're wow what now right and then you go five years later. You're like, oh, this is a very different movie than I walked Exactly, right very different. You expect the vengeance comeuppance the big return and I think no
Starting point is 03:38:13 This is a ah shit man the world sucks now and like they feel that the moment his head rolls everybody goes Well, what now and then the answer is fucking I guess I'm a huge fan So then we get time travel a lot shit I'm a big fan of them going through this long sequence of Explaining how time travel doesn't work like back to the future to yeah And if you think this movie is anything like back to the future to you're an idiot
Starting point is 03:38:44 Yeah, only to have a solid hour of back to the future to that's correct like so Noticed notice that we were lied to by the way. Yes We were told that in finish war would be a heist movie about Thanos getting the the stones. Yeah, and that part two would be the big fight and it was come our one The opposite it was a heist movie and everyone was trying to go like where was the heist I guess he kind of went to get the stones But no this movie is expressly called a time heist and hey Did you not watch Thor to the dark world because that movie sucks? Well, fuck you about 48 minutes into this movie
Starting point is 03:39:30 Cuz we're going to that piece of shit doesn't matter They actually got Natalie Portman back one more time for like a second. I can't believe they even got her Yeah, I thought she was super burnt and hated that you got stabbed by a raccoon off screen Doesn't matter she got the big credit at the end credit and she got huge got to walk on the red carpet huge huge credit Hell man, how are they gonna deal with a character so powerful was miss mark my captain Marvel? Oh, they're just gonna remove her for 99% of the movie She's the most Uncharismatic kind of pseudo bitch ever to the characters who don't seem to like her very much her attitude
Starting point is 03:40:13 I like so like Steph was asking about this like does she seem like she kind of hardened up a bit? I was like no she was pretty much the same in the other movie. They just didn't have enough chance to build a rapport It would have been nice if she did express like specifically become more of the Carol that everyone knows nonetheless though They definitely made you think oh shit. She's gonna come do it and it's like no not quite But she is the Superman of that world. Yeah There's no doubt about it. She's the fucking wrecking ball. Yeah that comes in to just blow shit up The point at she does what Hulk used to do but her but her her The difference this time is that she goes I got to go because there's more important
Starting point is 03:40:59 You're earth bullshit. It's not actually she really doesn't want to hang around. Yeah So yeah, like I I there's a lot of shit that was really fun My one of my favorite things they did was by time jumping you allowed the characters to take on the forms We wanted them to be already, right? Everyone goes through their time jump and a lot of the post five year later versions are now Other versions from the comic references that we wanted. Yes, so Hulk becomes the professor. Yes I've been looking for that the entire time the last fucking 10 years. I've been look. I'm Hulk everybody Hey, I'm a big nerd, but I'm Hulk, right?
Starting point is 03:41:41 Hulk talking in Ragnarok and getting smarter on his own was a nice lean in towards it. That was Buffalo's idea He wanted a three movie arc for Hulk. Awesome. Awesome, right because Hulk is like not getting his own movie No, and he works fantastically as a supporting character for others Yeah, so this is the best way to do it. We've tried fuck that. I just love lame Not really wanting to smash professor Hulk in New York, man. So Him becoming the professor is fantastic Natasha getting her red hair out. Yeah, after five years where now she looks more like black widow. Cool. Hell. Yeah, awesome Um off the cliff with you. Yeah. Well, you know, I will lands in the same pose as Tony's vision. Oh, yeah. Yeah, cool
Starting point is 03:42:33 Um Cap shield breaks in the same way. Yeah, I noticed that one that one ice Tony's vision. Yeah Carol gets a haircut. Yeah, rocket raccoon calls it out Rocket shows up and talks to multiple people all of whom have varying reactions of oh fucking space raccoon I'm getting emails from a raccoon Um Scott Lang is there as Ant-Man as Paul Rudd. Yes, I did say that in that order Still trying to remind people that he exists. I'm the working man superhero
Starting point is 03:43:10 I fully expected him to come out of that van like Insane, yeah, and then it turns out he experienced five hours not five years Yeah, because I would imagine five years in the quantum room was off. Oh, you go nuts. Yeah, but then Michelle Pfeiffer oh whatever shit up it's time travel fuck off Michelle Pfeiffer. Yeah Yes, she went in his cat woman. She came out. This is a Marvel character There was that there was The fact that fucking pepper comes in as rescue That was it. That was a fun little not as well
Starting point is 03:43:47 Didn't expect to see that coming didn't piece it together when the helmet was there even piece that together I don't even know what character you're talking about Fuck you. No, but I was like, oh pepper's gonna wear the suit at the end of the movie Like I didn't piece together that it was rescue. I don't know who that is. That's pepper's Yes, yes, I was I mean you like it's not Iron Maiden, which is a way cooler. Yeah That's another character But anyway when
Starting point is 03:44:19 When fucking When black panther comes out of the portal, yeah, do you remember what he says? He looks over at Hawkeye and he goes hey Clint Right, and that's it. What's the point of that? Why? What does that mean back in civil war? When they when the fight was happening black panther first showing up had to fight Hawkeye and Hawkeye shoots a couple arrows And he dodges them and he goes yeah, I don't believe we've met I'm Clint and black panther goes I do not care and then they keep fighting. That's it Jesus so later on when he shows up He's like oh hey Clint
Starting point is 03:44:56 Because they have that rapport That was great Obviously the awesome shit where we're full-on nodding to cap going hail Hydra Oh sought coming a mile away, but it was great nonetheless that they got that in there Moment is perfect because you walk in and it's like is he gonna and then he's in the elevator and it's like It's so similar to the winter soldier shot that it looks like it's there in the same building It's the same. It's the same guy. Yeah, it's the same goons. All the same guys are the same 100 Like winter soldier was a while ago, so it's easy to forget
Starting point is 03:45:31 I recognize some of the like non-standard goons, but and that's what the whole movie ends up being it's Throw back to that thing over the last ten years. Yeah, that scene that moment that character Fucking what's his name the the Hydra asshole that comes in yelling at them? Dude Robert Robert Redford Well, though the probably the wildest one that I thought that I might I can't believe they even bothered is that evil Hydra Nazi bald guy, you know the one that becomes a computer. Yeah. Yeah, they go Hey, look there. He is and he's like walking into the bunker that he becomes a computer in yeah, and he's on screen for one second That that's a deep you didn't need that you didn't need to bring that guy back
Starting point is 03:46:18 So he'd be on the screen for one second you can still see the house arrest ankle bracelets on Hawkeye and on Fucking at man from their Civil War bullshit When they when they it specifically shows you like what his feet at one point when he has it on Like There's a fucking there's so much shit over the course of those little nods and bits and pieces or whatever I think Loki picking up the Tesseract and disappearing is gonna be the reason why that Loki TV series gets to exist Because that timeline has changed forever because they had to double jump
Starting point is 03:46:54 You even if they even if they go back and put it back Loki still did Jump away. They put back the others. They didn't put that one back that timelines fun. I can't put it back twice Yeah, so sorry. What's her name? Stranges mentor Tilda Swann fucking one punch man. Yeah, but Yeah What we what while the invasion of New York was happening she was standing on the roof just going Get out of here. Don't touch this building. No, this building's fine. Destroy the rest of New York if you want I have Agamotto Fucking just standing there doing it that that that's larry's
Starting point is 03:47:38 There's a cap cap meeting himself when he goes I could do this all day America's ass, right? also the Fucking cutting to the intro of Guardians of the Galaxy one that is The best use of their time shit in the whole movie you had to know you had to know that that scene I want to believe that scene was written at the same time as Guardians one like I want to believe that they want They knew they're like just show it
Starting point is 03:48:13 Except turn the music off Just move the camera over because you know those you know those YouTube videos where they like they do like dancing in the street Yeah, except it's all the sound effects without the music of them going like Yeah And it's literally just him doing fucking come and get your love like an asshole with his headphones on and just shit shitty singing it takes two seconds to knock him out cuz quills are fucking moron Fantastic Iron Man's daughter
Starting point is 03:48:46 Morgan yeah, that's the name of a shitty cousin That Morgan Stark is like an asshole cousin that Iron Man has from the old comics. All right, so they just pulled that name back as a reference as well Stanley filmed that reference in The at the same time as Infinity War, but since this came out last this ends up being the last one Okay, so I thought the last one was gonna be Captain Marvel. Yeah, but this one was already shot. So okay, that was cool You know what I you know what we haven't talked about which is like probably my favorite character in the whole movie mm-hmm fortnight Thor fucking
Starting point is 03:49:28 Fortnight Thor they didn't have the ball. What if I was Thor? That's why That's how Ultron got into not all time. That's how Thanos got into fortnight Cross-promotion. Yeah, that's how it happened. Yeah Second they didn't have the balls to keep the fat suit on him the whole time for tonight people are saying for tonight I love it. They didn't have the balls dude. They took the fat suit off Have like after the shirtless scenes. He starts wearing a tracksuit and he's been his he doesn't have the giant gut anymore just like Thor being like an absolute fucking pathetic pile of shit
Starting point is 03:50:06 the whole movie After after getting the kill blow right cuz that's what you're what do you what is your character about? Just cutting to the him like him and rocket with the easiest job in the world And he has a panic attack and starts crying and runs off to hug his mom and it's like holy shit He looked he they're saying he was fat the entire he was fat the entire time But the tracksuit he was wearing and then the suit at the end it didn't look as fat as his big crazy prop gut Yeah, was he looked a lot? He still looked fat, but he didn't look as fat as he did when his shirt was off the first time Well, there was
Starting point is 03:50:48 Yeah, so the placement on it and you like here's the thing you know everyone's gonna come back right you expect it You already know spider-man is fucking coming out. You know the moments going down The whole thing is how or could you possibly make me forget about that, right? the best way to fucking do that is to have the pop-off moment that is Fucking hammer in Cap's hand. Yeah, which you know is gonna happen Yeah, but it goes down anyway, and they just lean into it and it's as good is it's it's literally like Like it's one of those things where you're you can sit there going Ah, I knew it was gonna happen
Starting point is 03:51:28 But the way they deliver on it is still so fucking hype and like if your audience doesn't explode at that they did It's like I you know what I mean? Like it's impossible that they don't like it's such a key so like everyone's coming back what was obvious, but there was a there's a bit where Even though you knew it was they were gonna have the big hero moment and was gonna be the biggest hero moment It's ever been ever mm-hmm. I was still astonished At like they do it and it's like and these guys and like and these guys and these guys and I'm like Oh, right them to own them you forgot about them and like and then rocket goes Jesus that everybody
Starting point is 03:52:10 There's so much. Yeah. Yeah, and then the music swells to overwhelm you with how much is going on and then it pans back down And then you go say the fucking words cap Sam It's like and then he says the words and you go Keep shit Keep shit rules look at all of them. They're all there consume the product. Ah Everybody's there everyone ever
Starting point is 03:52:41 Is there all the warriors and it's like except for the dead ones. Yeah, well, I mean vision's not there Vision can't he gets Paul bet and he gets to be on the screen for a second. Natasha's not there No, you know who got a pop that I never expected who? Fucking scarlet witch when she has her moment going she has her bison Tuesday moment. She has her like shut up Thanos I hate you. Yeah, and he's like I literally have no idea who you are. Yeah, like the on my audience blew up at that Did yours? Yeah. Yeah, okay, and I was like I thought everyone forgot about didn't care about scarlet witch I think the reason why is because they expect what's going to happen to happen And if that shit hadn't stopped she would have won right then and there cuz she's that good
Starting point is 03:53:27 I mean she's no it's like telekinesis shit cheats. No, she's not telekinesis shit. She's random probability Yeah, whatever in this she causes the vision by the way that Tony in this movie She picks him up and he's disintegrating. I didn't think people liked her that much. I didn't realize But so like And so that's what I was trying to say is they have they have the shock instant kill Thanos moment in the beginning Yeah, but they still get to have the real battle with him later at the end Yeah, you can do a boat which is fantastic because hey, no one ever really dies No one's ever really gone. No one ever really gone
Starting point is 03:54:12 Yeah, that was great the The relay race at the end. Yeah. Yeah, also like it's it's Spidey is so wholesome Like I want you to picture that moment right the come out the hug the whole thing the nervousness and all of it But now make that Toby Okay, make it Andrew Garfield It's gotta be Holland it's gotta be Tom Holland it's guy like he's the perfect fucking wholesome and fresh-faced
Starting point is 03:54:47 It really doesn't work and anyone else. That's how you know just doesn't do it shout out to the casting lady I forgot her name. Yeah feel really bad Gamora is a weird one. Yeah, because did she didn't get dusted? No So they go back in time to bring a pre-galax Guardians one Gamora forward so that we can go back to her and Peter Go on no the end is them searching for her and it just says searching and we cut away from the screen What are you talking about when up? When the remaining Guardians get on the ship it says it shows you them searching for Gamora Okay, well she left and then it doesn't tell you whether they found a different person at this point
Starting point is 03:55:28 She's different. Yeah, she kicked them in the balls We know yeah, but I don't think she got dusted cuz she switched sides Yeah, and I think well it's the version from the past but yeah, but but I mean I'm saying like it's like oh No, she was good when you snap your fingers and go dear infinity got all the bad Please kill all the bad guys. Thanks the end. Yeah, let's do it and it goes all of them are dead Yeah, it's not gonna include the girl who makes the switch. No. Yeah, it's too hot So there you go Nebula got so much play. Yeah, I was
Starting point is 03:55:59 Really surprised Nebula also gets to like be the single most confusing moment in the entire movie By far when she shoots herself when she shoots her to her past self and you go up and is then totally fine Yeah, yeah, yeah, wait what what the same timeline. Yeah, that's it's that is still so weird We had to I had to have this discussion right afterwards to establish it But it's like this is a this the timeline established here is not a singular camera timeline It is a multi-linear timeline But it does not it doesn't appear to be one where potentials are taken into account Right, so when you jump on over to the next timeline every time you you go through the thing you're finding another
Starting point is 03:56:40 Version of yourself weird though. You're not interacting with your back. That's a future for yeah Um Old cap Right, that's a nice way to do it. You give everyone there. I'm glad he got old He gets to he gets to have his yeah this thing. I imagine He wasn't I Imagine he kind of thought like let's not have a family because that would be irresponsible for me to leave them I imagine he kind of hung out with Peggy and then the moment she died
Starting point is 03:57:10 You went just all right We're just a bunch of fucking pus and then was like okay because if he had a family that he had to leave behind that would suck So I imagine he just lived out with her at some good times and then come came back. Yeah Well, he doesn't come back. He just well no goes back to our timeline. He doesn't know he doesn't he's just old No, but he's but they pulled him back no they don't He's just old and what happens to walk over to that spot as an old man. That's what happens He hasn't leave He goes and just lives his whole life and just good knows. Oh, yeah today's the end of infinity war
Starting point is 03:57:50 I'll just be there when they do the bullshit He was sitting on a bench Waiting for them But they send him back in time. Yeah creates the old man over there But the timelines that we have are not the same ones were on now shut up It's stupid so the way that two caps face each other is because the timeline he enters is one All he had to do is just not run and hang out with himself He was returning other infinity gems to themselves. Yeah, and then he just hung out, but he's not I hate this
Starting point is 03:58:24 I hate you are overthinking this massively. It's where the camera goes. It doesn't matter. It's a fucking dumb It's yeah video game like I know I'm I misunderstood that because I assumed that when he warped out He was gone from that timeline. No, but just listen to what I'm saying Yeah, I know and then the process of him aging would have had to happen in a different timeline No, go back in time and get the rocks back. Yeah. Well, that's that that's the fucking it every time and Every time anyway, if the camera follows you then then that's where you are and if it doesn't then yeah, who knows So he was old. He didn't even marry Peggy
Starting point is 03:59:07 He's married some other broad How do you know that? This doesn't want to tell Falcon about it. You probably fuck Falcon's mom. Well, Virgil didn't want to tell Dante about it Yeah, you don't know it cuts to the Pim and Peggy dancing. Yeah What are you talking about leaves are like two seconds later. Okay. Anyway, so Yeah, it just it's because Because it's by the way that is part of Scarlett's vision as well. What that song. Oh Then the dancing cool. No explanation for how Scarlett made that vision happen though, huh magic
Starting point is 03:59:41 Fucking magic because that what I was trying to remember how it happened. I was like, oh, did he interface with? Thanos's thing at some point or did he was because because Thanos has a moment where he goes Oh, you're cursed with knowledge too when they have the fight in the first movie and he goes Stark and he goes, you know me he goes I do you two are cursed with knowledge because they're both futurists and they're this to they're both the same sides of Yeah, they're different sides of the same coin Yeah, where they believe in cold logic to fix the problems of the future except ones, you know one's evil So none the other Thanos. I yeah, I was trying to remember what the catalyst was and then I went back to watch it
Starting point is 04:00:19 It was like, oh, she just touches his head and makes you see a thing magic the infinity stone. Which one did she get hit with space? space reality No, reality stores. No reality is red. Anyway, she got hit with purple. I think that's not that's power That's guardians. Okay. Anyway, so yeah, that's the whole thing is I just got confused by the cap thing because I assume when cap Jumps out that means the world he jumps out of if the camera is still there. He's no longer in that reality He's in the parallel one Right, but it turns out. It's not that If he can still exist if they don't have to pull him back. Yeah
Starting point is 04:00:55 That means old cap was just watching all that both that's what I'm trying to ask you like so cap was watching this whole war Go down a second time and he was like, I'll be fine and then he comes back. Yeah, and then just sits on the bench. Yeah But from their perspective they hit the button to send him back and an old man appears on the bench It's time travel Okay, so oh My god, I hate doing this. I really hate it, but it's like if that's the case Yeah, that means every time they jumped they jumped back on their own timeline. Yeah, so then what's the worry about? Bringing them back
Starting point is 04:01:39 To fix like for example till the Switton's timeline Well, had they done had they not branching back then they would have branched But the branch doesn't occur until until until they decide to not bring them back But that is a branch in itself. No, that's fine as long as they as long as they say they're gonna bring them back Right, but it but it but it actually is a branch No, the moment because they were always gonna bring it back, right? See if see if Hulk had left and they're just cuz you say it's not a branch if it doesn't mean it's not a branch if Hulk had left and With the with the time stone, right?
Starting point is 04:02:18 And they were destined to fail then yes, it would have been a branch However to tell the Swinton two seconds later Caps showed back up and say here's your stone back here you go. So did Loki get choked out or not? Yeah, nah That's not what I asked you That's why I told you that's what the movie tells you did Loki get choked out Yeah, probably. I don't know who cares. He needs a TV show Thank you for clearly knowing the answer to what the movie is the one that makes it confusing
Starting point is 04:02:50 What are you today looking to be for? I'm not the arbiter of this shit All all that matters to them is they made it confusing enough that they can get a TV show out of it Yeah, and have Loki wear pink shirts is Batman on it And I know baby Ant-Man is the proof that shows you that he can come back and be aged differently in the same timeline Yeah, but the branch discussion is where you have to start thinking about what it actually means though Because a branch means they fucking invoke back to the future. They do they do which means stop thinking about it I know they totally do they tell you not to and that's totally fine so
Starting point is 04:03:29 I'm trying to scrape for other cool things randomly. Yeah, the intro starting with Clint really great Yeah, that's really good cuz it's like he was gone What are we gonna do is how many we get a show the fucking snap again? I mean, oh, right. Oh, we didn't see Hawkeye's life get ruined. You get to see Ronan after the five-year jump Yeah, that's another transformation. That was great super lame, but it's just it's cool that they got it in there They got in the space Avenger suits They got in they got in the space away from how lame Ronan is. I have Ronan's fight so fucking lame Ronan's fine He's a fucking man going through a midlife crisis Ronan
Starting point is 04:04:04 He's like I gotta take revenge on tattoo a samurai on my arm like Jesus Christ fuck off. He's cool He's so lame man each shit. You're wrong. He's so fucking. He's such a dork. He's great Clint's awesome. I Love Clint and you know what? When they're fighting to be the sacrifice kill themselves like no, I'm gonna be the fuck no, I Hate myself more. No, I hate myself more. I was so disappointed that was really nuts I was so disappointed with who won because I wanted Hawkeye to die But then I was like, oh, but I knew it wasn't gonna happen And I was like, oh good black widow died. She doesn't have a family. I was happy either way
Starting point is 04:04:47 She doesn't have a family to live for and even if she wanted one she couldn't get it So the oh Jesus Christ Jesus Christ man Cuz I like I like that they said those baron mordo I like that they went to send Clint and Natasha to that planet cuz I'm like, oh fucking thank god I don't have deal with at least one of these losers for the rest of this movie. You're so wrong these fucking idiots Anyway, I knew that the family family family existing meant that Clint would make it Oh man, you know what is actually what they flipped it on you like four times though
Starting point is 04:05:24 So I get I do want to point out there is like a minor plot inconsistency that I or at least nebula's like a fucking piece of shit Or they send everyone to the teams and like Thor you're gonna go to dark world and get this shit from Natalie Portman Hey, you guys are gonna go back to Avengers one and do this shit, right? And then a nebula tells Clint and Natasha You're gonna go to verma verma or what a vormir vormir You're gonna get the soul stone and they're like yeah, and they're like how do we get it? And she's like you just go to the top of the mountain the red guy. I'll just give it to you Cuz like the fact that they get there and they're both like wait what is
Starting point is 04:06:02 Super fucked she totally fucking sets that up. Yeah, she doesn't tell them no man Like cuz like it's only fucking red skull that tells them I was talking at page about this and pages like why didn't they just bring a puppy? She didn't know chat says she didn't know So then they should have just brought a puppy. So I just thrown the puppy What if what if they sent cap and Tony over to the to get the soul stone like that's just the short end of the stick Yeah, man and You kind of wonder like is there gonna be some because here's the problem, right if they found a way to hack it to like Exploit the system and get the stone anyway a puppy then like it means Gomorrah was pointless
Starting point is 04:06:48 Yeah, and it means the old see the reason that I was not smart enough to find the channel doesn't love puppies You know, so yeah, that wouldn't that wouldn't work Yeah, and then only that but I kind of wondered I was like are is he gonna have a Like what did it cost a moment, but he just kind of he's just kind of like oh, I'm sad He just kind of goes fuck this. Yeah, so there's that Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's his neighbor was piece of shit, but just the the race to self-hatred You know it was pretty no I need to do it. It needs to be me There was the there was the fucking community cameo again Ken John guts and got in there as the security guard
Starting point is 04:07:32 Like I'm John. Yeah, sure. You had a cool mustache Tony talking to his dad That was a weird one because at first I was like, oh, they're having a heart-to-heart and then I was like wait Tony total I've then I remembered the scene in three where Tony's like a teenager slash late or early 20s and he's like he was talking to his dad as Fucking in his madman form. Yeah, and they totally knew each other and he was just a piece of shit prick Yeah, but now he gets to see that his dad wasn't that that much of a piece of shit back then Yeah, right before he was born. It was actually Tony's fault that his dad Like initially I was like, oh, this is a moment where he gets to have a moment that he couldn't have had it's like no way
Starting point is 04:08:15 He was around he remembers his dad is that it's a city. Yeah, it's before he became a curmudgeon No, it's a bit nuts though that like his dad was that trusting with a complete stranger hanging out in the most secure place that he'd never met Yeah, that was a little weird a little bit weird a little bit weird that he wouldn't do this I'm not big fucking evil space cube. Why are you hugging me? Oh, by the way? Here's a briefcase Yeah, a little bit weird. Yeah, also looks like Jarvis was not Just a very smart Just a very intelligent God damn it really is one of those fucking things Jarvis the the the computer was a backern him
Starting point is 04:08:53 Fucking but it was also his off. Yeah. Did you miss that? I didn't miss what that was a thing stupid Just a rather very intelligent system Let's just talk about the most important thing ever which is that Thor is now a guardian of the galaxy You mean an as guardian of the galaxy whatever shut up. It's the best which is which is another reference Cuz I'm like Thor's transformation into fucking comedy idiot has been the best as guardians of the galaxy is the best It's like we all know who's in charge Cuz with Ragnarok it establishes that Thor's home is stupid space bullshit
Starting point is 04:09:35 Okay, but here's the thing last time he was there hanging out with them. They were all like look at this chiseled man Yeah, and now he's gonna be gross and grossed up exactly. Yeah, but it's like we all know who's in charge. Yeah You are Oh Yeah, love it double hammer. I was double hammer was rad I was so happy that Ford stayed fat in the battle Like I was so worried that they were gonna they have a thing where Thor was like are Serious for the thing and he would come back and he'd be all chiseled and ripped and shit
Starting point is 04:10:15 It'd be fucking so fucking. I'll be a bummer Cap doesn't just replace the stones. He brings back the hammer. Yeah, he has to or else Thor can't finish Thor 2 Dark World Yes, yeah, but this is not happening on a parallel timeline. It's happening on the same current timeline Yeah, that means there's a part in Thor 2 Where Thor's like hammer and it takes like 10 minutes to get there and he's like what the fuck Shit dog and That's not a branch though. No man. It's a slight edit got it They got back in the fucking
Starting point is 04:10:51 The rock dude with the little New Zealand accent. You mean talk. I would what's his name? I don't know his name. It's the director of Thor Ragnarok. I take a watiti. Yeah. Oh That's awesome. Yeah, it's great and that fucking weird bug monster. It's great plays fortnight with them. Hell. Yeah And I guess the only other thing is it's interesting how at the end the successor could have been Either or yeah, because both Bucky and Falcon or cap. Yeah, and it's just like Which way are we gonna go with that? I like that they gave it to Falcon at in the end because Bucky looks like a psycho murderer and
Starting point is 04:11:29 Seems to be trending more towards that but Bucky has a cooler looking cap outfit. Of course he does and Falcons cap outfit sucks. Sure, but they'll fix it. It looks super garbage But like this Bucky looks all grimy and like I love murder. I'm gonna go do winter soldier murder. I love murder Hey, so what's your theory on how Tony got those stones off because I have one? I Would like to hear yours first. Okay. I think the fact that Tony made the infinity gauntlet Literally just an Iron Man arm. Yeah, as opposed to the original The original thing was fucking crafted by space dwarves. Yeah, crafted by spoilers and the new thing is like
Starting point is 04:12:15 Yeah, it's just it's an Iron Man arm when we yeah, I stole some tech Yeah, I think the fact that he made it a part of his Iron Man like interface Yeah meant that he had an option to eject and switch Control so that he basically got up to him and initiated that yeah as a potential plan so I think that what happened was is that It the script called for Thanos to win and then they did a camera cut and then Tony had to have the stones So then they held up his hand and then he had them That's that's why that's how I think he got that okay
Starting point is 04:12:51 But the moment goes down the same way it goes down in fucking Naruto Yeah, when I run up to you and I try to hit you with my kunai and then you kick me away Yeah, but then it turns out that I fucking did eight things while I was getting kicked away slash Joseph making a trail of Hammond hair. Yeah leading up to AC DC so okay, so what I think happened in that camera cut is that Tony took his hand and grabbed the rocks in that one second and Because he had to because he had to have them later
Starting point is 04:13:30 So that cap could go back in time, but he grabbed them super fast though Yeah, he really fast faster than he ever could before here's the thing think about it this way since Since there was no branches that means Tony was really just destined to grab them super fast and Say a cool line. I'm glad I asked you what your theory was and that you gave it after I gave mine. Yeah Because if I had said mine first it would have it would have been not as what yours wouldn't have been as fun to layer The other bit is like do you think snapping his fingers with the helmet on would have helped? I don't know. It's actually the one thing. I don't like about I don't think all is that it becomes you have to snap to use the shit And it's like
Starting point is 04:14:13 That's just what Thanos decided. I thought that's yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's true It should have there's no reason. He actually has to physically snap just wielding it on it So usually fine. The snap is the nice moment that does the thing. Yeah, it's true But yeah, the originally right now and I remember I was like, oh, it's the snap that causes that and it's like no It's because it goes up your arm. Yeah, and it atrophies your shit. So yeah, it's all radiation is shit See if Tony was smart. He should have just made a robot snap its fingers. Yeah. Yeah, I think I think I think he just had a He had a piece of tech in the new gauntlet. Yeah, let him switch it up. That was the piece of tech the The little little Marvel entertainment plot device little ejector boots, you know from on each stone
Starting point is 04:15:02 Yeah, yeah, but hey, it's also, you know that it's the rest. So wait, hold on You're saying that he decided to eject the infinity stones not when Thanos had his thumb and Fucking middle finger together for the snap so the Carol stopped it No, he waited until just the second when he was right there So they'd all shoot out into his palm. Well, he was too distracted at the time But the only reason why he wasn't distracted this time is because dr. Strange told him now's the moment by holding You know, I actually really liked about that moment when strange points at him because he's using all his magic juice Yeah, damn his hands are garbage
Starting point is 04:15:43 He's he points the finger and his hands are a shaky pile of shit Because we've established that when dr. Strange pulls out all the magic juice his hands go back to all busted because he's because of the surgery That's I didn't notice that he's like Barely make the one with his hand, but that's this is the one in 14 million and 604 he also um And yeah, and obviously the line there with the whole like I had to go just kind of refresh, but it's like Tony being like the hero and the most important dude ever because if he dies then no one invents time travel shoutouts to how casually he invents time travel
Starting point is 04:16:22 By the way, and just kind of goes Wait, what and everyone's like wait what and he just has a very like oh god, okay? Yeah, like all what I'd like to also do some big shoutouts to the fact that When they unsnap everyone Hank Pym comes back to life Which re-enables the potential for infinite use of time travel in that setting pin particles, which means like They're gonna they have to kill Pym Immediately off-screen like no they casually use the tech to send Kat back to do corrections No, no, but no they just now have the responsibility of making sure it never falls into the wrong hands ever future shit
Starting point is 04:17:04 They have to kill Pym instantly because they can't just have casual time travel around Well, they do re but it's protected by the Avengers dude You can't you can't just you can't keep this story going if you have the ability for the main cast to just go Yeah, okay, we got this. You know who had the best line Who's that Nick fury? Yeah. Yeah, what was his line? I forget Do you even talk he didn't have a single fucking line? The man who made it happen the
Starting point is 04:17:39 Mr. Avengers Initiative walks out at the funeral and just kind of stands there is like look not a single line I'm in the background too. I was is that insane. I got to be here That's so nuts to me. Um Not that there's much for him to say or do yeah, but yeah, that was it Tony being the end all be all of the universe is Like he's the first one so it's got to be him Well, it's it's it's just yeah, and and his movie was exactly his movie was the first one
Starting point is 04:18:14 That was a breakout hit that was great and whatever and you know like it was the popular big one But it's so weird to me because in the comics like That's cap, you know and here cap is still cap. He's the cap. He's the leader But there's never sort of a feeling of like okay, but Iron Man is the real favorite though You know yeah, you don't get that feeling from the comics But here there's definitely that underlying feeling of love cuz yeah, but Iron Man the movie guys, you know like There's more factors than just this own thing story at play Okay, well
Starting point is 04:18:52 That's about All I can pull out yeah pretty much there's tons more yeah, that's the movie is nothing but more yeah like that that's like Fucking fastest-paced movie. I've ever seen in my life There's no time for anything in that film imagine what got cut on the fucking You know on the on the cutting room floor and remember this was shot at the same time as the as last one too Like this was a fucking six hour or five hour consecutive non-stop bullshit like last year or the year before rather Yeah, oh, yeah, there's the Roscoe bit
Starting point is 04:19:32 Right Ross Roscoe Simmons the name on caps thing when he goes into the past when he goes to the Whatever the base. Yeah, and he has the he has the The office moment where he's staring through the blinds His shirt says Roscoe on it and Roscoe Simmons is the guy who replaces him when he becomes nomad Okay, he's the US agent that gets fucking killed hard by the Red Skull All right, so he just has the yes the name I feel like it's like it's like it's like it's like a Ben Parker I feel like there was a missed moment Ben Riley where
Starting point is 04:20:10 Like what's his name Hawkeye should have said you asked that red guy But instead of saying red guy you say ask that red guy with the big skull and Cat would be like It'd be like yeah, it was weird. He sounded like Hugo weaving Red Skull the messenger of death continues to make no sense But is the raddest piece of art design in the entire MCU and is worth existing for only that reason Red Skull gets a bad deal on top of that fucking planet because now the soul stone get got no one ever gonna go back and get it Ever again, there's no explanation for it except for anyone who uses the soul stone
Starting point is 04:20:53 I guess is kind of associated with it But holy shit, is it the raddest piece of fucking art design in that entire thing? It's great. It's fucking great Anyway And he's also just in space now in a place that you can go my god Okay, so Somebody in the chat pointed out there was one kid that I didn't understand Who the fuck it was and it was apparently like it's standing in between the Guardians and the fucking Ant-Man people Or whatever one kid with like kind of poofy hair apparently that was a kid from Iron Man movies
Starting point is 04:21:33 I remember exactly who the kid is you're talking about he was standing by himself Iron Man 3 child What girl what what what the kid he runs into when he his shit crashes in the fucking country You know the little kid he talks to for the first 20 minutes of the movie He hangs out in the kid's garage Then he fights the the the fireman in the fucking power plant. I fucking forget man. I super forget Yeah, I don't remember that that's the fucking most obscure shit ever. I have no idea who that kid is I do not remember much about Iron Man 3 in the beginning I remember the end part in the middle of the Manchurian or the whatever. Yeah, the Manchurian and the Mandalorian
Starting point is 04:22:10 Mandalorian was there. That's the one The end credit thing there's no after credit scene, but you hear the little ding ding ding noise Yeah, did you recognize it? Did you? Yeah, that's bullshit. You didn't know what it was. Absolutely. You had to look it up No, I didn't. You really? Yeah, it's the him making the fucking suit Why are you lying right now? You knew that that ding was him making the suit of course that's amazing I'm impressed if you actually caught that I did not I had no idea what the thing was the noise Wow That's if you did that's awesome. That's a fucking good memory, dude
Starting point is 04:22:48 I had no idea what the noise was. I was like is that church bells like what the fuck is that? No, it's that's that's it's him making the prototype hitting the helmet. Yeah That's good job good job. I I really could not tell yeah, no, I can't fucking you know Get out of a cube, but I can remember that shit All right Also those massive elaborate credits with the signatures on them. Yeah, that means you can never reprise those roles No, I can't like if you come back after that level of I'm signing my fucking autograph
Starting point is 04:23:29 I am like you're done. You're done. You're done. You're done if you will never be another Iron Man There could be an iron whatever But there will never now be another Iron Man or Captain America. You think MCU is gonna have the balls to never retouch recast or retouch Recast no, but they can make I think they're not I think they're smart enough to Iron Man To no they have such a gigantic roster to pull from I think the answer will always be grab what we haven't seen Yeah, you know Maybe 20 years from now There might be
Starting point is 04:24:07 Something where they go. All right, you know like hey, they might pull a Mark Hamill and company, you know like you guys are old now And it's been decades and you guys are kind of like yeah, maybe we could do one more You know like they might have one of those moments like Kamen Rider Black, you know, but I'm gonna go ahead and say that the smart thing to do would just be like not touch those characters Yeah, you shouldn't touch them and there's a there's a ton to grab. They're not as popular I want for I want Chris Hemsworth to be Thor all the way up until he becomes a Chris Hemsworth Anthony Hopkins Say it again. I want Chris Hemsworth to be Thor all the way up until he becomes a Chris Hemsworth Anthony Hopkins
Starting point is 04:24:57 Okay, and then he can pass the fucking hammer down to Bill Or his daughter fuck it, I don't care Maybe his daughter can be Bill Bill's already there by the way Beta Ray Betty, but Bill's already in the MCU. Well his his hammer was No, like his face It's on the side of the Grand Masters fucking dome. He's one of the past champions. Oh, yeah Yeah, so he's out there doing fucking stupid horse shit Yeah space horse crap. Yeah, we're gonna learn about space
Starting point is 04:25:33 I feel like they've established a stupid enough fucking universe that we the world is now ready for Beta Ray Bill Like right if you're ready for rocket, you're ready for rockets as bad as it gets right like rockets fucking stupid weird Howard Howard is as bad as it gets. All right, but he was there. He's there. So Howard is about is actually the Okay, all right. It's time to end this podcast. It is let's go. Okay. Goodbye everybody. Bye you you Hidamani Sun Sun
Starting point is 04:26:31 Kokoro Haremoyo Futatsu no Hitomi wa Himawari Notaneno yo Katarai Kasanari
Starting point is 04:26:53 Katamari Karamari Isho ni Iru koto Zettai Hichizen Temo anata daijiruna Ume oigazu
Starting point is 04:27:18 Owaru mane wa Jito so koko de Mateiru yo You're a lonely, lonely star Tachi domaranai De ne You're a lonely, lonely star Samae o nuite yukou
Starting point is 04:27:49 Yukou You're a lonely, lonely star Hoshizora Kirakira Konpei Tono yo Amakute Setunai
Starting point is 04:28:21 Omoiga Tsunoru no Takishimeta omoi wa Yozora o mai Kyukoukashite anata no moto e Togoku kara yo You're a lonely, lonely star Akiramenai de
Starting point is 04:28:53 You're a lonely, lonely star Tama ni made Uashite You're a lonely, lonely star Aitai no imasu You're a lonely, lonely star Hata meiki ga Kokouzu
Starting point is 04:29:33 Kokoreru Uuu Raiketsu mata no basho de Machiawase shiroba You're a lonely, lonely star Tachi domaranai de ne You're a lonely, lonely star Omoidashite yukou
Starting point is 04:30:46 You're a lonely, lonely star Materarenai no ne You're a lonely, lonely star Tamae o muite ikou You're a lonely, lonely star Tamae o muite ikou You're a lonely, lonely star

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