Castle Super Beast - CSB 170: Shepard Sticking Just The Tip Into A Mass Accelerator
Episode Date: June 7, 2022Download for Mobile | Podcast Preview | Full Timestamps RRR: Roar, Rise, Revolt, Review - Big Singham Energy Vampire Survivor Is Crack Street Fighter 6 - World Tour Needs To Retain New Players The... Worst Documentary You can watch us record the podcast live on twitch.tv/castlesuperbeast Go to http://expressvpn.com/superbeast to get 3 extra months free! -- Go to http://buyraycon.com/superbeast to get Raycon’s Fitness Earbuds for $20 off. -- Go to http://hellofresh.com/superbeast16 and use code superbeast16 for up to 16 free meals AND 3 free gifts! Japan sets new record, brings world closer to internet 100,000 times faster than current speeds Street Fighter 6 has been fully revealed: first details on new fighters coming to its roster, the Drive System, World Tour, and more. https://www.streetfighter.com/6/en-us/mode/fightingground.html https://www.hitc.com/en-gb/2022/06/06/street-fighter-6-roster-sf6-characters-leak/ Final Fantasy XVI launches summer 2023. See the new trailer and get new story and gameplay details. Resident Evil 4 is coming to PS5 next year: get the first gameplay and story details. Stray Intriguing feline adventure launches this July as part of the new PlayStation Plus.  Marvel’s Spider-Man series is Coming to PC. Rollerdrome, Skate parks turn into bullet-ridden combat arenas in futuristic bloodsport by OlliOlli World’s creator. The Callisto Protocol Terrifying sci-fi horror gets its full gameplay debut.  Season: a Letter to the Future. Â
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Discussion (0)
I
I
Alright first things first Morbius
Sweeped the fucking nation with a
300,000 pull this weekend over 1,000 theaters
Ending up at an approximate profit of
$289 per theater
We can put the sweep down for a minute
Um, it's blasphemous
But put the fucking sweep down for a minute further more we can bicker about Street Fighter 6 later
Because whatever all that shit clear the fucking table
This is me putting my hand on the table and clearing it. All right put put the turkey on there
What's the turkey single question? What the fuck do you know about our our our?
Nothing other than I saw someone mention that exact
lettering
Somewhere on my Twitter like our our is a movie. It is a film. It is a movement
It is an attitude. It is the greatest
Let me set you up
RRR is basically a
three-hour epic
about a
Revolution against the British Raj in India circa 1920
Filtered through the lens of
Singham
Of course, okay. I was like so I just looked it up and I saw the poster and I'm like, oh
It's sing him again
Welcome to go a sing ham except it's everything
This is the truth
This movie dude. Oh my god
Um and and and here's the bit, right? There's a lot of movies out there
There's a lot of movies that come out and you see like Indian high spectacle insane over-the-top
extreme octane action and and
ridiculous CG and like
Dance numbers that are just like out doing each other and a lot of that has been like singham represents like a peak of that
but it is not a
It's not the only one. I'm a lot
Definitely was the peak of that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh for sure
But but singham represents the way like like they got they got the fucking the the the the mustache
They got the muscles. They got the CG. They got the roar. They got the the music everything together into like a high moment for
all of that Bollywood cinema and
RrR is just taking it to the next level and furthermore
It is like there's up like there's a spiritual baton pass in the form of singham
himself the actor is in the movie as
She is as the the parent of one of the main characters, so it's like
Okay, okay. All right step one I see I see we're okay
RrR roar people people asking what the fuck is a singham type it into the fucking Google search engine you morons
roar rise
revolt is
Is the the the title of this movie and it is about
Like to be perfectly honest like I was gonna say like two two characters that like rise up and fight
But it's like it's two superheroes. It's really what it is. Yeah, and
Like they're just like look like again the the if singham is sparta
Okay, and there has to be a
The the the next generation that comes you know you have these two main characters. They're from different
sides, they're from different
provinces and
one of them is a
Supercop
Who's who's you know working for the the the Raj and the other is
From a tribe that comes from the forest and you know fire and ice quite literally
In the logo and all over every like fight scene and every moment
There is not a there is like no time wasted in this three-hour fucking epic
And it's it's an epic in the the correct usage of the word epic
It is like it's not just like the extreme
Sincerity of like the since the singham like plot or the the the the fight scenes
It is the sincerity of like the love scene the bromance
the the the the every every aspect is
just
pure
You know unfiltered. There's no
There's not even an attempt at subtext at almost in India
Likes to make video games the way ace combat makes flying a play sorry India likes to make movies the way
Ace combat makes flying a plane
Like it's it's too sincere. It's it's like caustic in its sincerity
the clothes like the closest thing to a
Layer that you might unpeel here is the name the the main characters
having names that are reminiscent of like characters from
Gods from an old epic tale, you know
But I mean
holy shit man like
These that like the the pair of heroes
They established themselves by just
Basically like meeting up to rescue a child in danger, you know and despite being from
Beings basically like star-crossed origins
They come together and form the purest bond that you know, it's pure because
Within about 45 seconds of their first like burly handshake and the music starts playing
And they're carrying each other on each other's shoulders and running through open fields and frolicking. Yeah, it's the best
you know
The Top Gun movie came out recently
But it makes me think of and it would combine with this
It's like do you remember when your your hyper masculine man
Would have a part in their man movie where they took their shirt off and like frolicked in the ocean
With their friend slash rival
Like almost every time
Absolutely, right Rocky and fucking Apollo in the ocean
Yeah, that's hilarious that energy went away and and and our our
Brings it back and it is like again like literal frolicking in a field
You know
It's like they just they basically show you the friendship blossom over montage and it's
unbelievable, you know
And then every aspect about it like so the guy there the evil governor Scott is
the
The the the representative of like the you know the British overlords that are that are ruling at that time in 1920 mind you
and
This is also a
Like since night it's 1920
So it's not the 40s when it actually when the Raj was actually overturned and stuff
But this is your like inglorious bastard style like fuck it
We're just picking a setting and going in hard anyway, and it doesn't matter because like when we need
Our soldiers to look like they're from the 20s
They they they are but when we need them to look like a Vietnam like fucking team with like literal
70s technology it doesn't matter. We're gonna just do it shut up though, you know
It's it's great too because as far as historical villainy goes
The Indian British occupation is a good fucking pick
Mm-hmm. I was just reading up the other day that
Southeast Asians from India Pakistan that kind of area because of the absurd
Dozens of famines they had to deal with over the past 200 years many of them are starvation adapted physically
Oh, you can play so so if your uncle has a little bit of a pouch
Yeah, literally the British's fault
Okay, so there's a plot point in the movie
Well at one point where one of the main characters in captivity is being fed only once a week and is totally fine
Because fuck it
Determination pushes you to your limits and makes you surpass them, you know and and they many just you know
He's fine like it's like oh, let's check out
Let's check in on the fucker who we've been feeding once a week
He's gonna be groveling and they walk into him doing like chain pull-ups
Drop glistening sweat, you know staring at the Capitol on the mountain go like
Like it's it's so sick because like like there are real life like DT's like characters in this story pop DT's
It's unbelievable
Yeah, so the the governor Scott is the evil British man who is ruling
over in the area in Delhi
in this setting and
He is played as none other than fucking
Ray Stevenson himself
Punisher man
From war zone second the second Punisher
Okay, so he plays like super evil British dude, and I don't know how
Yeah, I don't know what the what the casting
How it came together, but in fact he is
I saw some folks talking about how they had to get
Mostly Irish actors because they had difficulty getting British ones that would play the evil British. Oh, I can yeah
I believe that and the Irish will fucking jump at the chance
Every oh every evil moment has a giant Union Jack in the back waving
Like it's like they frame it. They frame it
You know, it's fucking awesome where you fucking watch like movies that came out of Hong Kong
And you've watched movies that come out of fucking India and you watch movies that come out of this country or that country and like
The fucking British or the villains like 90% of any of them that take place between like before like I don't know
1945
Yeah never sets. Oh, oh, yeah, oh exactly so
Like this thing like literally it's like for the for the purposes of upping the ante of this of the difficulty of
Enemies because your level one enemies are just regular old British soldiers are from the 20s
Yeah, I'm full of security employees of the East India Company or right
But but how do you but like for the for things for the pace and the tension and the difficulty to remain high
You have to eventually introduce blitzes. You have to introduce, you know, like the the the
The Angelo's if you would and so at that point you just go like we're reaching into the future and just grabbing future soldiers
And like make oh, yeah, you know the opponents at this point and it doesn't fucking matter
Yeah, and then oh my god like it's and again, it's not just the combat
It's not just the fighting because it is exactly as intense when you're gonna cut hard to your musical number, which you must
Right, it's mandatory
But the the mandatory musical number doesn't just have to be a musical number that is uh like
um
What's the word for when it like you leave the setting and you go into the musical realm and everyone is just in that realm
And then you re-enter I I don't I don't know what the the way
Okay, I don't know how to describe that like if it was a single actor it'd be a soliloquy
But in terms of like musical transportation
Well, I forget what it's called, but there's a word for that
But anyway, it's not that there is like you can have those musical scenes be diagetic where the
World is uh the musical scene has to happen because we're having a dance off with the Brits
Oh, yeah, okay. Yeah, sure. You know
um
So it it absolutely because usual your usual bollywood dance number is is like everyone's
Like they didn't go to space or magic realm or whatever, but it's it's primarily metaphorical
Exactly and like no no no no we can make it count in the story and make it make sense
As with honestly most of the song most of the songs
Like every time it cuts to the to the music, which it's gonna do like a bollywood
Uh, uh movie has to it's it kind of it's diagetic it mostly
All occurs realistically within the world, you know
um
Incredible so
Fucking uh, yeah, I I cannot I cannot stress and recommend RRR enough
If you have any love or any enjoyment for singham in your body if you haven't seen singham
Then go see singham
Because that's singham has mandatory
Singham has an ending so insane that me and woolly were like screaming at each other about it the whole way back
To where we were like and what you need to understand about like like that style of of
The style of justice depicted
Right in india in these in these stories
That is not exclusive
To singham or any like that is that is a culturally understood approach
To evil
And RRR continues the tradition and pulls no punches make no mistake, you know, you know, I would love to see
I would love to see a bunch of indian movies like this just like
Come out here as as real movies like don't have to download it don't have to stream it just like
So I want to see fucking this thing. I think I saw a trailer for this uh a few days ago
Okay
Does it have a part where like a shit zillion guys are angry at a tiny little fenced in cube of the british?
Okay, yeah, no, I did see a little piece of this and i'm like this looks like that singham shit
The dynastee warrior scene. Yeah, that's that's the start. That's the establishing scene for the cop character
It's literally dynastee warriors moment. Yeah, absolutely. Uh mooso for a minute
I um
Yeah, I I the the
There's a there's a a way that films over here tend to depict
um heroic morality
And a lot of the time like well, for example, you go watch the punisher because your the punisher is not subscribing to that
And that's kind of what's different in a way. You're like, I'm I'm really sick of the crackheads who hang out on my stoop
Let me just let me just have a fantasy moment. Um, but the the uh
Well more like the dealers really, but the I don't think frank makes in a many exception
Yeah, it gets it gets muddled at points. Definitely. Um
Or they're anyway, um
My favorite thing to talk about the punisher is what happens in a world with no drug use or crime or theft
Does he just start blowing away grandmas who are jaywalking?
Well, because it's like it's like no because the the bit is like, um
did uh
Did the mob wife happen to overhear something sketchy from their husband on the phone one time
Yeah, she could get it too
Yeah, it's a whole like hey hey like frank gets a phone call as he's like blowing up a dealer's house like frank
They decriminalized weed just now
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm
No, no, no
I don't know. I don't know how uh, how like
Canada is to every version of the punisher, but there was that one depiction where once the mission is done
He's his final victim
Yeah, yeah, I am there. There's there is there's more crime out in space. Sure
uh, but anyway, um
The the usual depiction is is often like, you know, let the villain
The best the most poetic ending is when the villain
Is shown mercy, but then they end up betraying that mercy and then accidentally get themselves killed because justice is poetic, right?
Yeah
The hero doesn't actually have to dirty their hands because karma and the universe will
They tried to stab the hero in the back, but they tripped over their feet and then they fell into the wheat thresher
And so on and so forth
Uh, this does not subscribe to that
Oh, no, no Indian movies don't give a shit about that. Hey, you know how we're gonna get the villain
We're gonna tie him down and beat him with sticks until he's dead. We're gonna we're gonna get the villain by getting him
Um
Yeah, it so
Anyway, I mean just tour de force
Coming of age a touch tone for our time
um
It's it's three hours, but it doesn't it feels it doesn't feel like it, you know admittedly we watched it late
So some some sleepiness was happening, but yeah, um, it is it is fucking incredible
And uh, yeah, it's just
It's the sincerity really that's what I keep coming back to is like
no attempt to to mask or veil anything if
If the process of rescuing that child requires me to
to uh, uh grab a flag
And literally drape it in water and wrap myself in patriotism to avoid the flames as I rescue the child
Then that is exactly what i'm gonna do
You know
I've known authors that use subtlety and they're all cowards all cowards all cowards
um
Roar rise revolts
Fucking go watch it
Do it like i'm just i'm thinking of parasite
And i'm thinking of how like in parasite
They use the the the modern looking house to subdivide characters along lines constantly
About are they in or they out and i'm thinking of like
A movie out of india in which a character would say you are out of society
I am in it
And they're like draped in gold
Yeah, I mean
everything everything um
That it it does too as well like there's a nice big
Like uh assassins creed the ubisoft style message about like you know the movie is is uh all meant to be fictional depictions
And we don't want to offend anybody and furthermore
Any animals you see are all cg don't worry about it
You know
And it's and it's and it's like you can they're just like we're gonna do some wild shit and and and
Fucking mother nature itself is getting in on some of this action. So don't worry about it. It's all cg
And then the land itself rejects the british even the land itself
This is an important plot point
You know, um
Yes, yes, it's it's great. It's great
You know, and I think I think there's some massive balls in making a movie that is so overtly like
Revenge worship against like a colonial power and then having the fucking gall to be like, well, we don't want to
I think I think that comes more from the complex like different
tribes and and groups of india that like are all depicted because it goes through
Multiple areas and groups. Oh man. And so I think it's more like about that, you know
And everyone uniting and going like yo, fuck these fuck this these british people. They suck
I was I was watching stuff on uh in india's like dialectical complexity
In which they have like 15 to 20 different like linguistic groups within the country and each
Each geographic location can speak to the dialect that borders it on all sides, but not one over
Because the language changes that much
Yeah, people from like the hard north end of the country can't talk to the people of the bottom. It's fucking crazy
Dude, you're playing like a billion is an like that's an unfathomable number to imagine in your head like things are gonna
That's more than five more than six even
um, but yeah, no, so so it's it's a lot of that
and um, I mean
I it it really
It just like yeah, your villainous action your british actions are like peak british villainy
um
and
You know, there's even but it's but it's even like gonna go out of its way to be like, okay, but hold on though
That nice lady over there. She's one of she's a white lady, but she might be she's one of the good ones
So some people are nice, you know
so
So you just gotta you gotta you gotta, you know keep keep that in mind
um, but but in the meantime like we're doing air combos and we're we're we're doing air sniping and we're
uh fucking
We're doing what I like human
like
Human kyodai gatae
We're doing human fusion
Okay to to power up
where like
literally I want to
I want to point out woolly that you talking about
A bollywood film and using the phrase human kyodai gatae
Is the absolute
Cringiest most weeb moment you have ever had in your life. Well, the problem is this is a new high bar for you
I hear you
But the problem is that I couldn't think of a more accurate way because it's not a fusion. It's not a um
a two becoming one or it is a literal
Put the one on top of the other and we fight like this
like the dumb thing of
Gurren and on top of lagann and then fight like it's literally that
I can't think of a more accurate game doing like the chariot games
I I that's not that doesn't come to mind
I don't know like what about what about
There I mean there's the other like japanese like thing where you do the chariot thing where the sports day festival or whatever sure
Um, and then you do that
My head goes to jet stream attack. What about two kids in a suit?
Pretending to be a person
Is it like that?
Yeah, I guess but like
With fighting, you know what I mean
Like when it comes to someone sitting on someone's shoulders and trying to fight that way
That's the only place my brain goes
I got nothing else for you. I don't know what to tell you
Find me a more a better contemporary reference and I'll update to that. I don't think there is
Okay, I don't think there is then fucking
Gattai it is
What do you want me to tell you?
Anyways, um
It is R. R. R. R. R
It's it's it's it's real do it fucking do it set aside some time and do it
um and
just
If you're what if you're coming into this and because I'm using the word singham a lot as the descriptor here and
but it's like if you if you're coming into this and you don't and you haven't seen singham then like
That's a nice place to start to know what we're talking about going into this, you know, because again, like, um
The same actor is in is it shows up and is
Literally in a fucking badass passing the torch kind of role. So, you know, so that's it's awesome
um
That's it. That's it
Uh
I just want to say one one more thing before we move off about the sweep about about the ongoing sweep
I want to give every everyone a little round of applause
Your morbius shitposts
Unironically cost Sony millions of dollars. There you go
It is it is the most effective use of social media to fuck with rich people ever
And you all did a great job
At the same time, uh, Jared is like can I get in on the joke?
And now it's dead
And now it's dead
Um
No, I you said something earlier because my I was trying to just remember all the things to bring up for this but um
When you're talking about uh, the sun
Never never sets on the British empire, right?
And it's like, yeah, like you want again you want to talk about like the the absolute
cowards that use subtext
And then the chads that have that logo emblazoned in gold
And then a splat of blood lands on it
Love it, you know
Like you have to imagine yourself in a theater
With the pop-off happening around you as you watch our rr. That's the thing. You know what you know what I want
You know what I want very badly
I want like
somebody's uh
68 year old british mum
To to sit down for tea and watch our rr
And I want to hear that. Oh, okay. Oh dear. Oh to oh, no
Our gnar wait, that's that's australian. Yeah. Yeah, that's let's get a little a little much. I know just
Like goodness
Oh dear, why is he? Oh, no
Well, that's not fair norse
That's getting australian again. You know what? I don't care anymore. I don't care
I have to say me me me and mage have had this moment
where
We saw some stupid video in which this lady asks australians how they pronounce the power puff girl villain mojo jojo's name
And is it mar jar jar jar?
Right, right, right and and have been walking around going our gnar for like weeks now
nah, yeah
Um, okay, so uh our rr. All right, that's one
Um two that's one. Okay two got it two
Vampire fucking survivors man
Oh, shit
God damn. I'm in
That shit is really it's my favorite spot machine. It's so fucking addictive dude
It is it is such a dumb time waster and holy shit
Holy shit. Do I understand why I had difficulty explaining it to you because like there's no game there, but I couldn't stop hanging
There's no every achievement. I have every achievement in that game
It's fucking patches come out and they add achievements and people go in and bang them out that afternoon
It's progress quest. It's just it's you know what I mean? Like it's the most non-game
But it's still just like yeah, holy shit
But dude if you get enough gold you can buy a second duplicator
And I can I can choose to pick this build that's going to be garlic based instead of a build that is based on
Uh, I like garlic based builds. The garlic based build is fucking sick. You get the garlic in the holy water
Yeah
And then you get the arcana that increases area at random intervals
So I like I'm you know, I'm I'm I think I've I've gotten to the third area and I've unlocked about like five characters or so
There okay, dude. There is actually like so much in that game now. Yeah
Yeah, there are there are like 30 characters and eight stages and like
Every so I say I maxed out the achievement list every achievement gives you something it gives you a thing
To to play with I I got the so that's the thing. It's like yeah, I upgraded
I got the the whip to be upgraded to the um bloody tear
Right, which the names are not fucking. They're not even trying to think, you know, they're not
It's fucking photoshop bayonetta is still there and whatever, but yeah
Did you unlock photoshop bayonetta? I don't think so. No, okay. Do you know why I saw an avid?
I know do you know why photoshop bayonetta is photoshop bayonetta?
No, because that character starts with two built-in default weapons that are two pairs of handguns that fire in four directions at once
Jesus christ, okay, and when and when you upgrade that it turns into a beam weapon like the bazillions
Then yes photoshop bayonetta is accurate
um
No, I did that and I upgraded the um
The axe into the sword and you know, I got those new weapons
I'm like, oh shit. Okay. I can do real damage now and at the end of your run. It shows you which thing did the most dps
Yeah, so that you can optimize for next time and so yeah, it's not just about dps sometimes about push
You will for sure for sure. Yeah, so I'm realizing that especially when um
Like there's the wave the kill wave is what I'm gonna call it because I feel like stage one 11 minutes
You hit a kill wave, right? Yeah. No, they're there. They're there. They're 24 minutes part of it is timed
Mm-hmm
And then like once the kill wave comes through if you're not doing enough damage to move through everything
Fuck you and that's where garlic starts to to fucking thank you
Right because garlic is good at first for getting nice and early levels
But then garlic starts fucking up when you have shit that's not gonna die in one time
You'll see here. Here's the thing
Here's where it matters because they all all the so the the the you you start the game and you're playing it
You're like the active weapons are what I really have to care about
No, it's the passive buffs. So first of all
You need to say go to library and you need to realize that the empty tome is off to the left side of the stage for free
And if you wait until you have your passives full
And get that empty tome. It's free. You just add it on to the end
It's bonus, right? And then you start going like, okay. Well, garlic doesn't really cut it near the end
Well, here's the thing garlic plus area plus damage
Plus empty tome which actually makes garlic able to hit more times a second frequently
It turns the cool down all of a sudden dps skyrockets. Okay, okay, right, right? Yep
And then you have to you have to figure out which one it is
The the the the build clear the screen clear
the the sigil nuke
Right like nice, but like what's the cool down, right? It's like, okay
Well, get the level level it up drop 10 seconds off of that get it more frequently kills all your upgrades though. Fuck
Okay, but still might keep you alive in some cases, you know
so the the pentagram
is
One of those it's like it it's one of the ones you absolutely must build around mandatory
because
It erases all the gems, right?
But if you get it to max level it done it only erases gems, maybe 20 of the time
But its final upgrade is that it is constantly going off and doesn't
Remove any items at all. Okay. Yeah, there you go that of course, right?
It's going off with like an extra effect like every 10 seconds. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm
I was kind of fucking around and didn't realize until more recent build attempts
How good luck is because luck lets you get more items on screen
100% and I was like fuck me man. Like so there's a good reason to go cross
Right
You go cross and cross combines with clover to make sword, but then clover gives you the extra choices for the rest of your build
Um and overall you get more healing right like you could just you get yeah
You get you get more you get more of the screen clears you get more um gold you get more
all that stuff so
There there are so you're on level three, right?
I'm on the I just got to the third level where you can where you go up and down and I picked up the um
I picked up the item there. That was uh, what was it?
Uh, was it a free res?
It was either a free resurrection or something like that, but yeah
So
Starting with the other map. It was a map. I picked up the map. Yeah
Getting the map is good. So if you get to the fourth floor, there's another entire set of mechanics there to unlock
And then all the bonus stages
Have series of mechanics to add
Um
And as you keep going and playing your characters
So you'll get a character and the character will have a new type of weapon
And then you get that character level 99 in a run and now the weapon is available for everyone
Cat I'm gonna assume the answer is yes, but you can take you can create a build that just becomes
Infinite lasting right like the stage. Is there an ending point ever or can you just sit?
Did you did you hit 30 minutes on anything? I guess uh once
No, I hit 40. No did I
You would know if you hit 30 minutes. I unlocked achievements for hitting
20 minutes and then I think
I think so
So here's what happens at exactly 30 minutes every enemy disappears
Except for one. No, which is red death. Okay, then I didn't do it yet
And then red death comes and insta kills you in a single shot. Gotcha. Okay. Okay. Okay, however
If you play for long enough and you figure it out
You can I had I had a game that I walked away from
For like an hour. Yeah, okay. Okay, and and just came back and was like
Yeah, this is good enough. I probably got all the length based achievements. Yeah, okay
I didn't know I didn't I didn't I definitely didn't go long enough to see that but I was conflating
I was thinking because I got over level 30. I got to uh level
Yeah, I got to level. I think my highest level was like 42 or so at one point and like that was
No, you can uh
You can get you can eventually if you go hard and long enough on this game
Get to the point where there is a build you can make
In which the game will be unable to kill you and you will have to quit. Damn
sick, but
That that road is at the end of maxing out all content
Also, when you look at the patch notes the patch notes constantly overtly
hugely lie
There's a patch he put out in which he's like it's going to be a really small
Uh drop this week all I added was one bonus stage and uh a couple new achievements
And then you get in there and it's the largest content drop the game has ever received
It has multiple levels and new characters and weapons
I mean do like it looks like shit. It runs like shit. It fucking
Half the time the controller stops being detected
So hey, by the way, it doesn't actually run like shit
You unlock hurry mode which doubles the game speed and it doubles the slowdown in the stage
One of the launchers like when there's enough enemies it's it's game speed stupid shit is changing
I I did see one of the launchers is like experimental speed fix launch of the game
I use the one with steam overlay and I use controller for that. Um, but like it's fucking
Uh, uh, like yeah the window just like if you if you lose attention from the window or if the controller anything happens
It'll just stop working
You know like and I've had like
um
Weird shit like that occur
Um, I do like it that you can refund your your permanent upgrades and and it's important
Because spend elsewhere. Hey
I don't know what permanent upgrades you put money into right now
I make a couple different tries to see what I like
Duplicator is like number one with a bullet. Hmm. It's it's like it's not even close and then after that is damage
um
Yeah, I like the fact that I can refund partly, you know and and try out different things to see what what works
Is is really nice. Uh, but just this is an example
Or just like it doesn't matter what you're looking at or like how it how it plays
It's just
Is the fit is the core element of what you're doing
Like are you having fun watching the number go up? Yes. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, then that's it
And then as you play more you get into the strategy because you know what my favorite unlock in that game is
My favorite unlock is a power up which is re-roll
You get to instead of instead of up instead of upgrading like 10 power or 10 area
You get to buy
five re-rolls per stage
Oh
And you get and you get to buy
Uh skips in which it's not a re-roll, but it just skips the level in general. So it doesn't walk you in
And then the best one is banish
Where you look at a thing and I want I want you to stop coming up in the the rotation
Oh
And the trick with that is the foot. I think it's the pentagram the fucking
upgrade for the the passive upgrade for the pentagram requires like enemies to become stronger
But you only need one level
So what you do is you get the one level and the next time it shows up you banish it
So that never shows back up in the leveling path. Okay. Are you re-roll the the ones you're looking at?
Yeah, that's what the option. Okay. Um, so you you get to the point playing it that you're starting like
I'm gonna have a really good run
I'm gonna do 40 minutes or whatever and you started and get the first level
And go re-roll re-roll re-roll didn't get anything once I wanted start over
What determines whether you get a chest with one three or five items?
Luck has a proportion to do with it. Okay, and luck has the other proportion
Because one time I got one that went from three to five and I was like, oh fuck
One one is numerical luck and the other is actual luck. Okay
Okay, so any chests is possible. It's not the enemy that drops it could be anything
But here's the really important thing the most important thing to know about chests
Is they can upgrade anything but only chests are where you're gonna get the evolved weapons
That's yeah, but some but you it'll show you the requirement though, right?
Like I saw the the the whip the bloody tear was like you have to get the plus 20 percent life
In order to me show you the requirement if you've gotten it once
Okay, so like whip goes with hollow heart, right?
And it shows you that when you get those items now because you've unlocked the bloody tear
But do I still have to get hollow heart to enable bloody tear every time?
Yeah, but that's just that's just to be like, oh remember this
Yeah, but like you have to discover all the weapon evolutions on your own
But if I don't want hollow heart after that then I'd have to learn to banish it
Well, no, it wouldn't it would still take up a slot. So fucking
Get it the only the only ones that are worth banishing are ones you don't have and definitely don't want
Or the curse up ones if you don't want the extra curse
Uh, okay. Okay. So if you're if you're running something and you're like you're absolutely certain that with the build you want you don't want area
Banished condolabra get out of here
And you'll get better you get
If you're playing on a level in which the condolabra, I think level three has it the condolabra is on the level
And you can just walk over to it
Banished the condolabra from the rolls so that you can make sure you get the other passes before you get there
Once and once you pick it up in the level it then enters the rotation again, right?
Yeah, yeah, okay. So just make sure to get all your pickups after you've maxed out
The passives. Yeah, because you can get like two or three extra passes
That was the one thing I was uncertain about was like I unlocked level two
But like I was like, I guess you just have to survive long enough to unlock the next level
But I didn't feel like I beat level one. So wait, hold on. It prevents upgrades
You have you when you walk up because you can't level it up after getting it. Oh, okay
Don't manage anything you're going to use even if it is on the stage
Okay, because when you walk up to the book it says do you want to pick it up or discard it, right?
Yeah, and you would always want to pick it up. Yeah, okay
But that's the thing is yeah, I kind of was like, okay
So I've unlocked level two, but like I don't feel like I'm done with level one, certainly
And I was like, you know by by pushing further in you get yeah achievements that unlock new characters and stuff
So I was kind of just like I guess
I was well, yeah
What I was waiting to figure out is like, okay, when do you know you're done with this level?
But that half an hour mark seems to be uh, uh, it kills you. All right
Yeah, and and you need to build your character in a very very very very specific fancy way
Which requires a shit zillion upgrades to survive the end of the level
But otherwise before that point just like
Collect, hey you made it to 30 minutes. Yay. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Okay
Cool. Cool. Yeah. Fuck that shit is just
damn dude, um
brain off
walk around dodge the enemies and
Just try to get try to get higher dps. Yeah, I fucking I streamed that game a couple times and every run has the same moment
Where chack just starts going bit rate
Because the game becomes like complete soup
Like it's it's like you sitting there playing it
Is basically impossible to read but by a stream it just becomes actual soup
Well, that's what I'm waiting for the inevitable like
um
just
when you play when you play, um
Uh, fucking insane schmups like when you play like, uh, you know, like anything
that, uh
Is a whole game or something like that. Yeah, but anything bullet hell
But then you have firepower that is also screen clearing and insane and just I'm waiting for that level of like nonsense to come out of me
You know and I can I can see it starting but I haven't gotten there yet
Okay, so here's here's the here's the the the the progression, right?
Right now make it to make it to 30 minutes and die. Hooray, right next step
Discover all currently available weapon evolutions so that you can start and get the whole row of weapon evolutions
Right that probably the best one to start is garlic holy water bible
axe, um
whip
Right just get off area just pure just like get through this. Yeah after that is build up your character
After that is go find the secret mechanics in
Areas yeah after that go build up that stuff and that once you hit that point
It's time to go into the unlocks tree and go
Time to start banging every single one of these out because they're all gonna give me something
I mean I like the fact that I like again
I just I stuck my head into like a couple of build things and saw some possibilities like one that was just like a regen build
where it's like, um
You can't hurt me faster than i'm gonna heal
Uh until the wave of enemies in this stage that happens to do insane
Touch damage comes through and then you're gonna die, you know or combining high regen with um the
Leaf or or whatever the fern the the laurel
Right that gives you eye frames
And then putting garlic on and then just walking into the mob
You know
Well one of the things that like that happens is that they they'll the game will come out with a new weapon with a new character
And it'll be a cool new weapon
And you're like cool and then but it doesn't have an evolution and then a patch or two down the line
They'll add. Hey, did you know that if you unlock this and unlock this
That this old weapon actually has an evolution now and it's fucking busted
Okay, okay
Yeah, and there's like there's all sorts of shit you can unlock you can unlock
A fucking card that will give you uh four lives and every time you die you get 10 stronger
Sure
Well, some of those characters just so like some of those characters are just like
Feel busted immediately and others are just like oh, oh woolly. You don't even know every row of characters
is is is
Mechanically more busted than the one above them. Okay. Okay, because I'm lucky. Why would you ever go back after picking?
Because you the the first four or five characters you're like adds
A cool down speed
Up until level 30 adds this then you start to get characters near the middle that have their own
Projectiles that don't combine with anything but they start with natural duplicates or they start throwing out duplicate attacks
Per level and then you go another row below and you have characters that are 1 power or area per level
infinite
With no cap
I mean, I just got um
The the winged demon dude that's like has a free regen every 30 levels and walks
And and and has 200 walking speed
Or yeah, okay, um, you're gonna want to
That's i'm like this fucking crazy
You're gonna want to level 99 that guy because that doing so unlocks the card that lets everyone else have that ability
Okay, it felt insane. I mean this is so but this is so good compared to anything else right now, you know
um
And the the other character that like starts with all their moves scaled up to max size for like
Three levels of three or one minute or whatever it is. That's it too
Is like you just get fast levels right away with these bomb drops, you know like
Yeah, and then you and then when you get to the point where you're unlocking secret characters
That just start off 10 times stronger than any of the other ones can get
Yeah, yeah, so no man
Fucking hell like
That thing that that is a proper time waster. Um, it is a cookie clicker that is that is is doing its job
And vampire survivors
47.3 hours 105 out of 105 achievements. So that there's there's your timeline
It doesn't deserve like like like should not land and and be as good as it is
But just fucking kills it and it it costs
299 and it looks like less like it like oh, yeah, Xbox live indie games
Uh, uh, you know level in terms of what you're seeing here, but
God, it is it is the absolute
Best example of like the triumph of the solo indie developer I've seen in years and years
We'll just you need something like this to like slap down on a boardroom desk and watch people just lose their minds going, but
How what you try, you know, like yeah, like and I'm in a place right now after playing so much of it
It's that like version 0.6 or whatever and I'm like the game feels
completely finished
right now
like
I genuinely don't know unless he just adds like 10 more weapons and five new levels which
I guess they totally could
There's nothing stopping them a fucking okay. I'm gonna make that axe the axe goes like this and it's got a 10 pixel asset
What what is there to there's another patch in a few
Thursday there's a new one day. There you go. There you go, right? What's it gonna have?
Like just have that in the meantime like you're spending what on tress FX
You know, you're you're putting how much together for this complete
Nothing
Unneeded feature for this massive quadruple experience
It's going to add stage five as well as a new weapon and power ups and it's
Sure
excellent
Two new arcanas one new weapon one new power up
That could be anything
Man that could be anything someone's gonna steal this and just make it like slightly prettier
And just like and they're just it's gonna be they're gonna miss
You're gonna miss you're gonna miss it. You're not you're gonna you're gonna lose the spirit. I think
It's right for stealing it. It is a perfect formula
It is absolute so I I I can't get I can't of course they already did yeah, there you go. Yeah, exactly
I can't um, I can't confirm this. I've seen people
Speculate that the gentleman who makes this used to make slot machines. Oh
And is one of those things like even if it's not true, which it might not be oh, I believe it because
The game's a fucking slot machine
I mean like can't is every single sprite a just a modified castlevania sprite like or is
No, they are they are
They are all
Technically unique
Because I don't know castlevania well enough to recognize everything when I see it, you know, they are
Okay, well, do you remember when we would commission
Legally distinct like music for videos back of the old channel that sounded incredibly similar
But they weren't because they were actually completely new. Yep. Okay. That's this
There you go. Okay. Okay
Um, yeah
No, man. It fucking it it worked
I'm in on that
uh
I can
And you know what here's what's here's what's
Here's when you know, it's like it's it's dangerous and it's doing its job is like
I would take what I call teppen time
And I'm like I feel like playing vamp survivors instead
Right times where I'd be like, let me get a match of teppen in I'd be like, let me get a run
of
Vserve in
Yeah, no, uh, the the reason um, the reason why
I banged out all the achievements in that game
Was that because I was like, ah, do I want to do, uh, you know what I could do
I could bang out
30 minutes of vampire survivors and then by the way you unlock a mode called hurry mode
Which just doubles the clock. Yeah, okay, so that it's now 15 minute runs
Uh, yeah, no, um, so good shit coming off of that fucking. All right vamp serve
Uh, good shit, uh, what else?
played
common writer
Super climax heroes
This weekend. I think I I think I rated you while you were doing that. Yeah, uh, I think so and uh
I was like, is this motherfucker playing common writer? I'm playing some common writer. Yeah
And I and I need a better fucking like
thing for notifications. I I I cut I
Because I've I've made rates are hard to see
So I've missed a bunch especially since I'm like focused for the youtube purposes, you know like as well
What I've done is I've made a notification that just pops up a little woolly versus logo in the corner of the screen
And I'll kind of like if I see that I'll be like, okay, someone in the last five minutes did and I'll I'll try to
Oh, yeah, so
So like when when sometimes the people read me everybody in chat goes, hey, you're being fucking ready, but it's like, okay
Well, that works
But then other times I'll be like ending the stream and like thanking somebody and just scrolling through the stream elements thing
And be like, oh somebody rated me 22 minutes into the stream. Yeah, they're gone
Exactly they're super gone. Exactly. Yeah, I got that with um, what were we playing?
was something the other day, um
And it was just like, oh, um, um
the the fucking the beta for um
Multiverses like, you know and and just
Like I'm like, ah, shit. Sorry not to be rude. Just didn't one
Usually we're just thinking youtube focused in two like it didn't yeah, I didn't see that so gotta figure that out
People yelling usually does work though
Admittedly, but not if they're fucking locked in emote mode
Wow giant bomb just disintegrated
Uh
Jeff just left giant bomb. I saw that popping up in in the in the chat as we were going I was gonna
Uh, uh, take a look on break and see if we could throw that on and see what's going on
But uh, uh, what's going on is 19 minutes ago. He says today's my last day
Okay
No longer any reason to ever listen to their podcast ever again. Good for us
Unless he starts a new podcast again
I I assume there's like
still stuff going on
like that's
The announcement the announcement is that he is that he's leaving
Right, not that and then he's like, hey follow me on twitch. Yeah, okay for a second. I was
I'm saying giant bomb is disintegrating. I see. Okay. Gotcha. I was a little confused. Okay
um
Huh, all right. Well, that's that's breaking news
um
What was I even in the middle of talking about
Um common writer is is is blows fun
It's it's a fucking it's a game that puts all the writers in it
And then it says hey, do you want to do some writer kicks?
And then you do the writer kicks and then it does the sounds of when you do the rock the writer kicks
Hey, do you want to clock up and hear the voice that goes clock up? Then you do that?
And it's like, yeah
And what's particularly fun too with uh the version we played because there's it's been a franchise kind of like the like
Any like Naruto fighting game series that's been ongoing and stuff where it um
adds, you know more and more new generations new characters new eras etc as time goes on so the
Latest ones that are out have the newer writers from the reiwa era
that started um recently
but um
That means that like you're gonna miss out on some older generation stuff, you know
And so playing super we got to include the showa and heisei. So like that's all the like original
writers, you know the the
Itch you go and you go and all the all the the cool original stuff and then the the era that we
Saw a bit more of which is the heisei like kabuto and and and double and all that stuff era as well
um
So playing it we got to yeah
You would when you get to show our writers in there when they do their special effects and their writer kicks like the game puts on a
Fucking film grain filter and like when you land a writer kick
It pauses and does the full explanation of what a writer kick is and when you like the full narration of like a 70s style
finishing attack, you know, like it was it's it's pretty fucking sick
um
And thankfully uh as well there's there's fan patches out there to take the japanese
Games and um get some more english in them with like the name translations and just you know a couple of texture replacements to get
Some more english in there so between that and a full save file had a pretty good time
Um, no guy. I'm unfortunate. I saw I saw some talking out. Does that is that game online or
No, it's it was a it's a wee game
Oh, that's weird because I saw somebody mentioning somewhere like the first rage kit quit ever on getting the fighting game
But I didn't know what that was about. Oh, no, that was different. So uh after we enjoyed uh cabin writer and um
Had a good time with that where not a single
not a single uh
Incorrect fact was stated for the entire episode. We were correct
Factually about everything the entire time
Uh not one mistake
Uh, anyway, no, uh, we after we played cabin writer and had a good time. Um, we switched over to shrek super slam
Which I don't know if you remember the term crumpet dashing
I vividly remember it to the point where I remember hearing it for the first time in buffalo
So we played shrek super slam a couple years back because we discovered that there is a competitive shrek scene
for the shrek fighting game that turned out to
uh
Once all the laws were had
Actually have tech in it because
Whether intentional or unintentional they made a game where movement options could be cancelled into each other aggressively
which leads to
air dashing into cancelled blocking into rejumps
All sorts of stupid stupid shit. So crumpet dashing and um
onion drops
and noi no dashing
And all kinds of wild shit are real tech that you can look up
Which then created a meta which created a competitive scene which has a rule set and regularly
um
Runs tournaments and events right so shrek super slam
Uh, which you can I mean there's a discord community. There's I believe the shrek boards for you can go for more and whatnot
They have a tier list they put out which uh last time we checked and updated it red writing hood was considered ss class
I remember that uh, she's now banned
and um
Digging into the wise in the house. I can completely
Red writing hood should be bad. I can feel it. I can see it. It's insane. It's just completely unfair
um
she has the ability to uh, essentially do a
Charged apple toss that hits you three times in a row
She can do it to you otg
So once she throws you once and you're in the corner
She she hits you with the apples and then she can re-grab you. Um, and
Once you fucking re-grab you can just do that as much as you want until you build up a full meter
And this is like playstation all-stars where the only way to get a kill is when you hit them with a super
So free kills
Right, uh, the it's called touch to slam
Right, you can get you can get touch to slam by by red writing hood pretty badly others can do it too
But hers is are insane. So there's that
And then someone has recently been working on an hd remaster, which does a texture replacement
So you can get crisper textures on all the characters
Shrek's vest looks a little bit better
Um, the the crumbles on on gingerbread men, you know, a lot of that shit is a little there's a good texture replacement pack
So, um, yeah shrek super slam hd remastered
Um, you know, there's there's there's shit happening. There's an active scene
And, um, we got in there, you know, we we we played and we we fucking we did it
Of course, uh, nothing reminds you of the era you're you're in
stronger than going to the settings, uh, screen
And the bottom option of the activision game is a trailer for the game over the hedge
Uh, lest you forget the film brought to you by the creators of madagascar and track man. I don't remember that at all
over the hedge with the with the squirrel and the
and the
the other one and the rabbit
Animals doing cute animal things
I got nothing for you on on over the hedge
well
It doesn't matter, um
Point remains, uh
Fucking shrek is legit
It's real and any game that
Whether on purpose or accident
Allows you to have too many movement canceling options
Will become competitive
Yeah, undeniably. That's the most important thing
It doesn't matter. What else is happening in the game if I can
Like cancel my air dashes into into cancelable shielding into cancelable double jumps into cancelable wall jumps
We've got we've got a match. We've got a meta. We've got a game we can play, you know
um
It's real
Shrek super slam is real. So that that we took a look at that. It was a good time
And uh, we're gonna be that's gonna be coming out soon as well on getting to fighting games on uh, woolly versus
The hd remaster in particular, um, you might need to you know, adjust some settings once you install it, but
Uh, I was able to install it and and
Hd
Shit and also you want to get yourself a save file to unlock the bottom the rest of the cast
Oh, yeah, no. Yeah, definitely. You want. Yeah, you want to do that
There's bad stages though. Some stages are, you know, um, have too much interference
So gotta you gotta check the rule set on shrek boards as well
That's what's up. Um, watch you can watch the episode and find out more about uh about what to do there and everything
Um, and thankfully no copyright music issues. I don't think
Weird I don't think I would have figured there'd be something all star didn't play
So
It seems like it's all just shrek-like music, but not actually shrek music. So I think we're gonna be okay on that
Um, yeah, that's that's pretty much it. Hey, let me ask you. How's your cotour to lp doing?
Uh
Over
Yeah
If you know, oh is it not happening to your channel?
Oh
Fucking universal media group fucking blocked like 16 of my fucking cotour to videos because really
Yeah, oh shit my that lp is dead on my channel
Uh, no, I I I don't think uh, I've had anything
Let me take a quick look
Um, I haven't got I haven't gotten flagged
Huh lucky you I guess
Okay, that's what I get for letting the music breathe
Now admittedly, um
part of what what uh
What men does is when like when he doesn't upload and and if he sees something gets flagged
Um, he can pull it off and because we separate the the game track from my voice track
He can mute the game or replace the game audio to avoid that problem on youtube, right? So part of the big
Con convoluted setup of not just dumping the the vods on on youtube allows us to
Do things like keep my voice and mute the the actual
YouTube the gameplay footage. Yeah, what's weird though is that it was completely fine up until like last week
Yeah, okay, and then all of a sudden they all just like explode probably because of new new licensing
Shit gets uploaded. I I had I was on the assumption that it was because of the obi-wan
tv show
Which I found out more about what happens in that tv show. Wow. Does that not need to exist at all?
Holy shit
uh ff6 was running into a lot of problems with um
Uh search for friends, right the fucking the main theme of theme of of of world of ruin. Yeah, so
Um over the course of that like or you know find streaming
But then the moment you upload that by default it gets claimed so then we replaced it with um
Basically like we we had covers and different versions of it pop would be replacing the music so
Um, yeah, it's interesting. I don't know. I mean, I'm hearing
I mean, it's a star wars show so it's not surprising, but I'm hearing mixed things
I'm hearing some people say talking about saying basically I'm hearing some people say obi-wan is dog shit
I'm hearing some people say yo, it's really good
Right. Yeah, I'm not gonna make a value judgment on that because I haven't seen it
But what I will say is that it's very obvious that it doesn't need to exist
um
and
Like the the argument obviously
Like I really like the red letter media reviews and thus anything that I say that would agree with that is going to be
Say, well, why don't you just have my make your own opinion for you yada yada yada?
But it is really funny to me
That the obi-wan show
Is like literally a bit from a red letter media review
In which
It would have been so easy to just have baby han solo walk out
And then have characters hang out and have them say i'm baby han solo
Because that's actually unironically literally what the new obi-wan show is right
Instead of the han solo though, it's leia
Did you know that obi-wan and leia hung out like a shit ton when she was a little girl?
And they actually knew each other really well and they had a whole adventure
The go fuck yourself that's stupid
It reminds me of the um like
The the gotham show where it's just like young bruce is just hanging around showing up
That you know, we're just gonna
Have tons and tons of eventful things happening in in young bruce's life where it seems is like
It's one of those things where you're like if the kids life was that eventful from the start like it
Like the the the turn is not even a surprise at that point in a way
It's just kind of wild to retcon that much but um, and I think they had like proto joker in that as well
um
Anyway, I don't know
They did it for smallville and it and it and it worked for a bit and then uh, um
And then the show didn't stop after one or two seasons where the original writers wanted it to and then so I think
I want to I want to clarify something here because i'm seeing some folks going like pat you dumbass
She obviously knew him in a new hope like yeah, that's my point
That's all you needed. Oh, they knew each other
You don't you don't need
A story to go back and go over every single fucking millisecond of every character's life
And explain how every single interaction and fucking thing. Oh because of that. Oh like filling in the blanks sucks
so, um
Again as someone who hasn't seen it. I know that like
uh
A lot of what I initially was thinking about cloning wars was like
That's years of blank filling right yeah
um
Seasons upon seasons of filling in the blanks there, which uh, yeah, I was surprised to find out there were
quality stories in there and and bits and pieces that uh, you know people were
Pretty happy with overall in their contributions to things. So
I don't automatically look at a spin-off that fills in the blanks and and and and
Wave it off, you know, it depends on how it's done in each case. I suppose
I'm gonna use a different example
That people are gonna be very mad at but they're wrong and there it's okay that they're wrong
You know what was a great?
ending
To a story and then it gave you everything you needed to understand about how it would lead to its own character in the future
Metal Gear Solid 3 snake eater
And did you know that they released games that took place in between snake eater?
and metal gear one
And every single time they dove in to anything to do with that character's motivations
It fucking sucked didn't need to be compared to having it just be there
Didn't need to be water is so bad. I completely didn't need to be water so much
And paz has to show up because paz matters, but like
Yep, yep the the the the the finale of snake eater tells you everything you need to know
Unless you mentally fill in those blanks. Absolutely. I I I do I'm sorry
I can't be as I can't listen my my my mentor figure. I had to kill her and I'm so sad. I'm depressed
I was abused by the government. I'm disillusioned. I'm horrible
But first you need to hear about that time. I went on a date at the beach with a girl
I thought I was with 13
So I I think
Like some of it's okay boss. She was actually in a doth like fuck off some of the fleshing
Out of stuff as you go into those games is like
um, there's bits and pieces you can you can uh, you can take like everything with like fucking
the wildness of like hui and and and and
Is uh, just the entire fucked up emrick family
You know just the more you find out the worse it gets
Um, am I supposed to understand why boss went bad unless I hear about pussy bombs
But the but the the boss the the boss is the thing that I feel like is yeah
Like that's one where you're like, oh god dad like and like it's such a delicate matter because of how
Well established the poor point was at the end of snake eater. Absolutely. You know, um
Yeah, but
The exact but like in in the star wars context, right?
Um, you're dealing with a setting where
Uh, there's tons of shit that makes no sense and even the ones we like anyway
so
It's a story that takes place in a full industrialized galaxy
That somehow always ends up revolving around the same like 40 people
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm trillions upon trillions of lives and it's always the same five guys
Which is why it makes the setting so stupid
And it makes crea extremely right
It makes her super right
God bless
I love you granny
You're insane
Um
Prey being related to palpatine. It's like the worst the thing that ever happened to the series
Rian Johnson was right about one thing and had the character be at nobody
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Is it ryan ryan? It's not like that. That's weird. I don't know it happens
Oh
You remember oscar isaac standing there going like just wiping his proud us
Somehow palpatine returned
anyway
so I watch
I want like I I I I usually
Uh, whatever I get like algorithm feed, but I got I got uh algorithm recommended a nine minute video of um
Of uh
Uh god, what the fuck is wrong with me? Shit, uh
Mark hamill shitting on star wars for nine minutes straight
Yeah
And it's just everything from the force awakens going forward with him just being like at first
He's just like grunting out his thoughts and then at some points
He's just like and then he just goes full-throated on it and goes. Oh god damn it. There's cameras around aren't there?
Ah, fuck whatever. What are they gonna do?
You know like you know and just like it's just a solid 10 minutes of him just losing it
Uh, you know or not even losing it, but just being very like sarcastic about everything happening in the in the new trilogy
And it was it was a fun watch
I very much enjoyed it and then like in some cases they they kept in just enough
To have like him say something and then everyone in the audience just laughs and then like a producer grabs the mic and goes
Well, what we need to what we need to to say is that uh, luke plays a very pivotal role in the upcoming films
Just the spin that has to happen right afterwards. It's fucking great
You know what you know what it reminds me of this whole fucking thing
this whole fucking
Everything to do with star wars and filling in the blanks. It reminds me of the official fucking star wars twitter account
Uh posting did you know that a seer that that a legion of slave cultists helped build the death star
Underneath that ocean planet the palpatine and then Elijah wood goes. No
Because it's not the movie
How would we know that right? Why didn't you just tell us in the movie?
Yeah, like
um, uh
God, what was the bit? Yeah, no like the main
Uh, oh, it looks like we got some connection issues going on here. Well, I guess
How brodo get to mount doom? Oh, I could answer that by the mile says froda
Because you saw it in the movie
The the the main issue, uh, he seems to have to is kind of like
Why would the same fucker that abandoned his hero training
To go help his friends
Now completely do the opposite and go fuck that. I'm not going to go help my friends, especially when
They're actually going to die for real, right?
It's like
We've established that he's willing to break the rules and not listen to anything
He's supposed to because he cares about his friends and now he's suddenly not going to be that person
Forget that dude forget. Hey, you know that character that would rather
Literally be tortured alive by lightning
Rather than stab the most evil person in the world
What if I just murdered my nephew in his bed because I had a bad dream?
And don't forget too that in a in a in an almost anime like way, um killing the villain
It's not the killing that matters
It's what's in your heart when you do the killing that determines the outcome. Yeah
It's a good kill. Oh a righteous kill. I felt sad about that kill
So it's okay
That that killed did not have the satsui no hado in it
Yeah
It was the power of mu
Yeah, that's that's that's how she did it. It's fucking hate star wars so much
Which sucks because as a child I liked it
I still like stuff
I like the part where they have a laser sword
That's my favorite part
I like the part where the old lady says if you have a laser sword fuck you
You're ruining everything
People are trying to live assholes. Why do you get to be the main characters of the fucking universe? You stupid
Fucking jerks. I hate you. I hate you all so much. I actually I actually think my my favorite
my favorite, um
Anything in star wars is talking to adin right away in cotor 2
We're like it wasn't a jedi civil war. It was the sith and he's like who cares. Yeah
Yeah, like do you stupid fucking religious space wizards having your dumb bickering fight like you're always fighting
And there's millions of dead people like who cares. Yeah. Oh, it's not the other jedi
It's the sith like you're all magic you all laser swords. It's the same
Right like
I'm running i'm running away from my my exploding house
Because of your stupid battles
Like who's who's causing the explosion who's shooting from what like what the fuck off, you know like yeah
um
Or worse your entire planet is held hostage
Anyway, um
Yeah, so so
That's that's that's all going down. But um, anyway, yeah, so
more to come um
shrek
common rider
videos should be dropping
This week over on woolly versus not to mention of course mass effect continues
um
running into some uh
unforeseen
unforeseen difficulties with uh
with reggie's
command
Yeah, what's that of shepherd?
um that
like
If you can imagine the entirety of mass effect one
With a version of shepherd that just has his dick out the entire time
I can
Then this is kind of this is kind of that it's kind of a problem. It's becoming really uncomfortable really quick
Hey, let me tell you that universe is is ready for that playthrough. It is it is
But when it's not it gets real weird
But yes, that's it. That's just make sure to shoot every bitarian you see
Um, it's all I have to say gotta
Gotta gotta find out more there, but they're bad
The fucking just put a little mosaic down at the crotch of the n7 suit
And that's that's the real that's reggie running through that universe
uh
not that and the weirdness that is like
um
endless amounts of glass him moments where
It's like, okay. I'm gonna do the thing that is clearly the bad thing
And then when it happens and goes way harder than I expected the batting to go much harder
I'm gonna be super shocked by the outcome and then I'm gonna awkwardly try to roll with it as if that was my intention
So that's that's what I'm talking about of like
Of the the shepherd blue and shepherd red. It's like they're fucking different people entirely. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
You know like one of the early like early conflict like fucking, you know go down and do the fist
Fight, you know, and then at the conclusion of that it's just like, okay
So how's this gonna go?
And then reggie picks the option to end it as quickly as possible
It is just like, oh my god. Wait
Uh, yeah, that's what you get
Uh
Just has to has to yes and
So fun fact if you bring if you bring a rex with you
You get to talk to fist for about two seconds
And then rex just walks up in the middle of the conversation and blows him away with a shotgun. There you go
Yeah, and you just go, what are you doing? He's like, I just shot him
Yes, I killed him
Yes, and have I done this same thing over the years that we've been recording? Of course I have infinite times
But now we get to watch reggie do it
Yeah, it's weird
Like let me tell you when I was going through those games relatively recently
I think I was just doing every filthy fucking
Sex joke possible because the games give you all the information you would need
There are long term
Exhaustive codecs and player discussions in which you can discuss the fucking
sexual health
of people on your team
Like it's all in there. They knew what they were doing
I mean like the the mention of
The resurrection of the reapers was immediately followed by
Do the parts fit?
Like well, no, they're too big. What do we wouldn't well? We don't know yet, right?
But the fucking like just like oh god. Oh, this is bad energy
But this is this is bad. This is not this is going to be a problem shepherd with the dick out saves the universe
Yeah
You know, what if what if you stick just the tip into a mass relay?
You wouldn't you wouldn't want that to happen. I mean no you wouldn't like that
You activate a dormant mass relay and you just lean in and just
It would blow your fucking dick off woolly
And I thought I'm a log dormant unknown race from the furthest reaches
Of an unknown galaxy see the relay turn on and see one thing just sticking out the middle
That that is that is red check woolly. It's not a teleporter. It's a fucking rail gun
You'd just be firing the tip of your dick off so they would see the the head floating by yeah
Use the mass effect just on the tip
For one brief moment it would be glorious and horrible
And then the the race that was on the other side were probably not going to attack but now they're going to attack
They they're going to have to attack
Uh, anyway, all right. Um
That's all good. Uh, that's having we're having good having a good time. Um
And and also, um
Just for for any that are curious. Yeah, you'll you'll probably have noticed with like the more recent episodes
But like this is going to be definitely a little bit more of a a I guess a silent feeling LP in a way because I'm really
I'm really leaning back and letting reggie take the reins on it. You know, um, I mean, I'm jump I'm jumping in for little quips little
Little, you know bits here and there, but like it's as it's as it's his decisions
Um, he can he's controlling the pace and the flow of things, you know, so yeah, if it feels a little different
That's why I'm having something similar going on with I'm doing isomium files
And it's like what's the mystery? All right time to fucking sit back
And occasionally I'm gonna hit the x button to keep the conversation going
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm
Game's gonna talk to itself eyeballs. Hi, oh
Because the because you can see
Um
Yeah, so there's that and of course, you know good ol elden ring good times as usual
We're moving on up to volcano or what what are you doing now? Uh, I'm gonna go clean up before volcano. I'm gonna go clean up
Um, some of the areas that I have visited but I haven't cleared like completely cleared out
Um, that's smart
Yeah, because I feel like there's a there's a like yeah, I can see it's like, okay walk out of the capital start the rest of this
I'm like, let's finish the cleanup behind us. So we're doing that
um
So yeah over on woolly versus uh, all that's coming. Uh, yeah, and just a heads up though get into fighting games. We're gonna
Uh, I'm yeah, I'm gonna have there's a couple weeks. I'm gonna be uh gone. So
For
Saturdays, it's gonna be a little bit spotty
Um
Touch and go. I'll let you guys know each schedule. You can check on twitter of course to see what we're doing
um, but um, yeah
Check that out. Oh by the way, I think
Um, so yeah, I this week for example, I'm not I'm not gonna be there
But the I think it's uh, not multi versus rumble versus
Rumble verse god these words. Is that a royale wrestling?
Yes, that's coming back for a beta on
This weekend
Is that open or closed? I think it's said open
rumble versus
Rubble verse rumble. Fuck that's so close. I know
rumble verse
I think it said it's coming back for a beta this weekend. So I'm not gonna be able to jump in but um
Check that out if you can on the 11th
Let me see this
Uh cross platform play test on june 11th
There you go picks off the road to launch
June 11th, what is that? That's a fucking
Saturday probably can't do that myself actually bummer
Yeah, okay. Well, that looks like that might be the
Uh, the next opportunity and don't watch anyone else play it. Just go without
Um
That shit that shit was really fun, man
It's really fun. All right. Uh, but yeah, that's going on. That's that's what's up, uh over there. How about you?
All right. Well considering I just mentioned uh, I somnium files
I have nothing to add about that game other than it's great and that the I somebody in the chat pointed out
The I in a I stands for I
Which I'm going I got I dude
Someone even pointed out to me the other day
That date is like a he's a he's a pervert and he has an opi shirt
But the specific opi shirt that he has has the boobs look like eyes
Oh god, of course they because it's opi
Dude like it's it's it's
Kojima
Just tweeted
Detected in sand brought back from the asteroid Ryugu where we born in space after all
Motherfuckers talking about sand, dude
Like we're like we're approaching
The the event horizon. We're approaching the point of no return. I want I want to point out
I want to point out
That woolly and I
Clearly actually can see inside this man's brain
Because that's that is a half step away
From our law like our our sands dna's
Fucking sandy. That's what it was called
Like it is right there about amino acids
Part of the building blocks of life
Necessary to become a replicator
Being discovered in sand
From a space asteroid. I would not be there
To see this concept show up in Death Stranding 2 now that we know Death Stranding 2 exists
And there's beaches with sand on them
I can easily see there's amino acids in the sand because the genesis of life the extinction
um protein chains
created evolved to become one kind of race, but
Like just uh
Yeah, all right, let's move on. Hey, I'm pat. Here's what I did. I played. I mean I watched x-files. Oh man, dude
So we're watching x-files and we've been having this joke for weeks and weeks and weeks
about like scully being the being the skeptic
And watching that whole first season where it's scully quick go to the car for some bullshit
And she runs out and the instant like she walks out of frame
Like the child starts levitating the fish man
in the air
And then the they explode into a million unrecoverable pieces right when scully walks back through the door
And I've been saying like I've been imitating molder for weeks going it was a fish man scully
I saw I saw I seen it
It's like aha molder
Episode two of the second season
molder catches a fish man
And I'm like oh man that nothing dude. There's nothing gonna they're never gonna get that fish man, but they they fucking
Catch it and they put an FBI custody
And it fucking escapes but like a hundred people see the fish man
And what does scully say how do we get the fish man molder?
Everyone sees it and it's a fish man
And I'm like that's not how I heard people describing the x-files
I heard people describing the x-files like scully going like I don't know molder
I was gonna say is there a conversation of vindication that he gets afterwards
No, she's just like holy shit. What is that? That's a fish man
And I can't I also can't believe that the example
Was also the the random stupid thing that I picked which was a fish man because a fish man is a stupid stupid thing
Yeah, right
But it's also Lovecraftians, so it's possible. Oh fuck. It's great. It's great. There's something
uh
There's something pleasantly defiant about uh, you deciding to watch x-files now during the middle of a stranger things
Uh, uh relaunch
Oh, dude. I like
I
I I got three I got like halfway through the first episode of stranger things season two
And they were like, oh, what's going on? I don't care
I don't care. I did all of two. I did all of two and I was like, I really wish this was new kids doing a new thing
In a different setting but in the same setting rather but whatever
And and you know sure got through it
And that was that and then I got through like I think I started three and like the first episode
I just tapped the fuck out
Like for me, it wasn't that it wasn't that it was the same setting is it was the same characters doing the same thing in the same setting
And I was like, I don't
So a lot of people are talking about for uh as being like, um
Like it's over like it's it's back to being good because I guess it's like focusing on like the weird
Like high school bullying thing with 11 and and and and such um
And I guess like
I think they confirmed that five is going to be the last one or something like that
Oh man, wait a minute. We carry even less
But yeah, like there's some sort of confirmation about the finality of what it's going to be and stuff and like I mean i'm
Hearing that four is good. It's like I'm curious
But at the same time like the premise of the like the strength of what I what of of the premise being something that could be like
It doesn't have to be the same cast you can you can you know
It it feels like that just drops my interest and uh, I want to say
Like one of the actors had a quote that was like, yo, they really need to start killing some of us off because there's way too many now
Who that was hilarious because like oh they just they they added you they they add new roster every season
And then everyone just sticks around and it just becomes like a bigger and bigger thing
It's it's the same thing. I was just talking about with star wars. It's like you your setting is like the entirety
Of 60s to 80s united states were weird shenanigans
And you've decided to zoom in on a group of like 10 kids that are going through every supernatural thing ever
Back to back to back. It's like take steven king, right?
steven king has asserted that main is fucking haunted the entire state of main
Is extremely haunted, but main is a state. It's a whole state
Could you imagine if every fucking steven king book dealt with the same batch of a hundred fucking people?
and
Yeah
Down the road. Meanwhile the next exit over
This shit starts happening like it it and here's the thing, right?
The we've talked to everyone's heard us talk about the anthology shit all the time and yet he had us
So no need to reach or rehash too much of that
but the idea of like you of going for a
Different setting different same setting different people different story, right?
How much more exciting and cool would it be if you had like different seasons of
Survivors of whatever supernatural crazy shits going on and then you want a finale season where those survivors then meet up with each other
And cross over in some final way, right?
Like let's let's i'm talking about x-files, right?
And you're talking like you know what x-files has a shit ton of you know what 22 out of 26 episodes in an x-file season
Are?
Hmm. I don't know scully. There's some fucking weirdo vampire monster eating cows
I don't know man. I think there's a mutant that eats people's livers and can go stretchy arms
I don't know man. Maybe there's a fish man. Oh, no
We brought up some kind of evil worm that mind controls people from the ice. It's monster of the week
non major plot fucking shenanigans
Great
Every like the the argument against monster of the week is always like hey, I don't think they can make a compelling enough new character every week
right
But I prefer it the thing that you
Like you're the one who taught me this concept when we were talking about fucking cowboy bebop 19 years ago
And you were talking about how much you loved how few episodes in cowboy bebop give a shit about the quote unquote plot
Yes
It's great. It's fucking great
Spike is running from his past and he can't get away from it. I'm gonna have my hijinks and every once in a while. What the fuck is that?
Anyways, we're having space adventures. We're doing what the fuck is that?
Like it's awesome. Is that an evil clown?
You know
That's why it's so good is because it matters when it happens and it has to do with what he's trying to fucking run from
It's great when you like, you know what take it easy
You know, it's a great show fucking tng because every single week you're like, I wonder what they're gonna do
Oh, no, Jordy got trapped on a planet with Romulan. Oh, no, so and so became a fish
Oh, no, they fell into a portal where all they can do is gamble at a weird 1950s casino
Oh, no, warf wants to kill himself because a barrel fell on him
You know what episodes of star trek are kind of lame
Episodes in tng that deal with like the long-standing threat of the neutral zone and the romulans and the plot
You just need to scully yelling. I don't know what I saw
I don't know over and over again
Yeah, how many episodes of star trek have to deal with the fucking holodeck or the teleporters fucking up like 300
Okay, you know why because those are episodes where you can go well, fuck it
They fell into a different dimension where everyone has evil must do anything
Yeah, you can do anything and it's just so frustrating when I see a story go
No, not only are we gonna not do anything different or anything
We're gonna do the same thing we did last time
Like I feel like bigger
any reasonable system of of like
Safety protocols would look at holodeck accident 15 and go
We're shutting this fucking thing down until we can find a better way to get people on and off planet
So there's a there's a fun little detail about that where in the second season of tng
They introduce a character called reginald barkley good old reggie who is uh
The only person in starfleet who has like crippling anxiety disorder
He's kind of a fuck up and he's terrified and in particular
He is terrified of the tele of the transporter
He he's freaked out and
fucking
Jordy tries to explain to him. You know how rare fucking transporter mishaps are reg
You're crazy, man. It's the safest thing since flying in space
And then you go on to tng which has so many
Transporter mishaps that end with characters being killed
Recombined and in one particular case
Becoming trapped in an alternate dimension as a space slug
Okay, that you get to deep space nine where the writers are we are no longer going to have
Transporter malfunction plots. Okay because tng did like 30. Yeah, okay. Okay, perfect
And like reggie is correct to be terrified of the transporter
It is insane to continue using this fucking thing
Also an entire season of it voyager home of the shittiest writing in star trek until the card came out
The most controversial thing to ever happen in voyager was two characters getting combined into one person on the
transporter to create two vicks
which is
Janeway decision of
Get in the fucking thing and split back into two people or I will kill you
And the character is going. Please don't kill me and she's like I don't care
Isn't there also a fucking
Split
Character into an alternate version that now is just a second living
Yes, uh riker or whatever. No, there's other
Riker gets beamed up, but it doesn't complete correctly
So the pattern gets correctly resolved on the enterprise
But the riker on the planet just stays there
But then they were like well, we picked him up. So they just leave him there on like a destroyed
Island for seven years and then they go get him and he's like my life is ruined
Yeah, so you just you created life. You'd literally just also creating life when this thing goes badly like yeah
uh, anyway
Start start
People like star trek because star trek like genuinely people like star trek because star trek is a fiction
In which you can have any type of story you want
You can you can have for example
Well, the gang got teleported into a fake reality where they have to pretend to be robin hood to rescue Picard's new girlfriend
Why because they wanted to do a fucking robin hood episode
That's why there have seen what appear to be clips and screenshots of multiple alternate realities that are just time periods
in earth
Fuck it
Like fuck it is. Hey. Hey. Hey star trek rider. Do you want to talk about how it sucks the way we deal with poor people?
Uh, okay
Cisco fell into the past and has to reenact a bunch of poverty riots
just in case
And we're gonna do a two episode series of how the future sucks to be poor
Fuck it
Fuck it do anything
Excellent stranger things. What if will buyers was psychic too and there was a bigger monster. Who gives a shit?
It would be so interesting if you did the the fucking
The you made us care about a couple of different groups and then you had a final thing where they came together
You know guys RPG you're gonna
We're gonna explore the exciting story
Of how Obi-Wan Kenobi went from living in this spot on Tatooine
To living on a slightly different spot on Tatooine, but his hair is whiter
Get ready for the new adventure. You know won't go anywhere
I might actually start Obi-Wan just to see I might start it. I'm uh
I'm open. I'm open to the possibilities. Oh shit. Anyway, anyway move it move x files. Great moving on from that
Uh
Fucking signal us finally put a demo out. Have you seen signal us? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah nice. Okay
So if you have not seen signal us signal us is a playstation one
throwback
Uh survival horror game that takes place in space with an incredible like
Anime art style. It's like fear effect and silent hill and uh resident evil
and uh the demo is out and completely nails every single part of its presentation every single part of its controls and soundtrack
and it's just
like incredible
I am so excited for that game
like fear effect but better is is
really
Wanted some good that's some good space to occupy that that kind of need to exist fear effect so bad to be good
But it's not it's not
It's cool like it's not
It's so cool
And you want to love it you really want to you give it so much benefit of the doubt
Oh, but it's not good and it's just not fun. It's not good. It's not a good game
You're like god damn it bounce off so hard both times. I really wanted to love it. So yes
I'm way down way down for something that has that energy
uh, cool, uh
And uh aside from that in terms of stuff how much was it?
How much was the demo how how how much game was in the demo?
20 minutes. Oh no, not even like a
It's very much a you do you you go through the the starting area and you get to do one puzzle
There's five enemies and you get to pick up a gun and use the gun
And you get to do a lot of the first person cool stuff like ps1
But then you fall into like a super intense
Visually trippy nightmare sequence and it goes fucking signal us wish list it. I'm like, yeah, okay. I already did but I'll do it again
um
And the other game that I played which I would highly recommend everybody to check out by the way. I got it for free
Uh from devolver, but is card shark can can sorry. I just don't signal us like, um
Yeah, like is there was there like um like full voice acting and and and everything?
um, no, um, no, there is no voice acting
but
the computer
nightmare of octong and
Like warning background noises in german
There's that in in voice acting, but other than that, there's no voice acting at least not yet
Okay, yeah, no this thing looks fucking cool and like not a goddamn
Room with decent like like like it's doing the space horror thing where it's like good luck finding a single room that's properly late
I feel like every screenshot. It's it's it's taking it's it's uh, it's it's influences are incredibly obvious, right?
it's a ghost in the shell and fear effect and
um that but the the space design is
100 true blood fucking nastromo alien one
complete piece of fucking shit
70s spaceship
Like a a space truck
Yeah, no, this is one that's been
We've been looking at waiting on this for a couple years forever. Yeah. Yeah
Cool cool cool cool
But moving on to devolver's card shark, which again I got for free so take it with a grain of salt
Card shark is one of the coolest games I've ever seen in my life
Have you seen what card shark looks like looking at it now?
It looks like a game made entirely out of renaissance era
Like playing card paintings
um, and what card shark is
is
Not a game about cards has nothing to do with cards at all
You in fact you don't play cards in card shark what you do
Is you fucking cheat and steal?
And the entire game is dedicated to you being a poor little french man
Growing up in the era of the 1700s with voltair and all those dickheads and going hey, you know what?
You know how we can make some money and travel across the country by fucking learning how to cheat like motherfuckers
And it goes into hey, do you want to know how to run every classical card scam that actually exists?
Oh real scam. Here's how you here's how you do it. Here's how to fucking here's how to load the deck
Here's how to fucking indent and dog ear the deck so that you can top deal it
Here's how you can leave the room and fucking replace the deck with blanks and then load my hand
Here's how you can fucking rig a coin toss
Etc
And it's all does the gameplay
Like because i'm looking at the there's like what appears to be like a overworld conversation platforming kind of thing
And then once you're like playing the actual
card part of it what so it looks like you're playing cards right in the in the footage
But what it actually is the gameplay has nothing to do with actually like holding five cards out in front of you and picking the cards
What it is is that you're going to go to a poker game
And you are going to try and fuck with these people and rob them through trickery
So what you're going to do is you have a suspicion meter that's going to rise depending on your bet
And it will increase slowly as you perform scams on them
So you will then pick the scam that you learned the best
And run the scam on them. So the easiest one is to pour wine in their glass
Using the analog stick while your character peeks over their shoulder to see the amount of clubs that they have
And then after after you finished pouring the wine and it says good pour because you didn't spill it to cause suspicion
You'll then wipe the table near them in either a clockwise counterclockwise vertical or horizontal
To signal to your partner you're working with whether on its clubs diamonds hearts
Or spades
I saw someone say
Wario where
Yeah, yeah, okay. Absolutely. Cool, right and then or uh, let's see
I'm gonna we're gonna throw a bunch of where I'm gonna pick up the cards after a
Play and I'm going to be picking up different bunches of cards from left or right
To load in the cards in the correct order
So the fourth card is always going to go towards my buddy who's sitting fourth
And so I want him to have all high value cards
And as you're doing this you have to do as fast as possible because the suspicion meter is ticking up
And you're basically just running tons and tons of cool ass card scams
And you're fucking hitting Voltaire with the fucking rigged coin tosses
And you're going on this adventure in 17th century france to fucking get rich with the gypsies actual Voltaire
Yeah
Nice does Voltaire's like hey, I got some rich friends. Teach me how to cheat. This is cool
Yeah, does he does he talk shit Voltaire's a fucking yeah, he's a witty one Voltaire's like wow deception is fascinating
Can you can you rob these people and win all your game of cards without me noticing? Oh, wow, you did. That's crazy
Good for you. I'm fucking rich
I think like the
Like the like the only thing I remember being introduced to him by was uh the quote
Give me five minutes to explain away my ugly face and I'll bed the queen of france
It was like all right all right
Sure
And so I don't know what the current the the current like exact uh, uh fucking
Goal is right now. I hate to hang on that far, but it seems to be make some money
Go down to the Roma encampment that you're chilling with because those guys teach you the first card tricks like the guy teaches you three card Monty
Right
Pay essentially your rents to the camp
Right for the guys who are sheltering you moving you around so that people don't get you go out
Hustle some more people and from what I played for a couple hours like three hours every single new stage is all right
Here's a new hustle and you get a
You know a chapter thing that says like chapter one
But it's just like a card that says one out of x and it's like one like trick one out of 68
Trick two of 68 of this batch of scams
And you can choose which one you're gonna do
Yeah, it depends once you learn enough of them you'll be going like oh you can choose the the shuffle
You can choose to load a deck you can choose to indent it you can choose to dog gear it
You can choose to load in duplicates
Then like the most interesting one that I found is that you're leaving the room
To to load up a good hand with a duplicate deck
But upon doing so you have to make an excuse to leave the room the second time
Because you now have to unload the duplicates
Because if you don't unload the duplicates and deal out two twos of spades, they're gonna go what the fuck is going on
This has too many fours in it
And you have to you have to socially like present an acceptable reason to okay now
Here's the question that's very important towards a game. That's all about lying cheating and stealing
What happens when you get caught?
Uh people go what the fuck motherfucker and they kill you
At which point you go and meet death and can play a little game of cards with death
In order to earn your life back in which you can also cheat
Okay, okay
wager with the devil
And cheat your way back into life
Yeah, nice. The button is literally cheat death. Nice. Very cool. It's great. It's super. Super good. I love it
great concept
And that's it for me if you want to check out more crap this week you go down to Pat stairs at the
So wait twitch.tv slash Pat stairs at this week is the video game week. Well, he
There's the devolver thing. There's the xbox thing. There's jeffy k's summy game show
I mean there was last week's too, but uh, yeah, the sony thing which we're about to talk about ad nauseam
Jeff did say keep your expectations low. We're mainly focusing on already announced things
Yeah
That sucks
Except for the game
Except for the one big one where he announces sands sandy
I mean
Maybe silk song will be there
Like I
I feel as if just no matter what their friendship is at this point
Kojima can't show his face on camera unless he has a nuke to drop
You know, I think I think the way their friendship works is that kojima looks down at jeff kealy sucking his dick and goes
Who are you?
And then he goes i'm okay
This is okay. Yep. Uh one second
Cool all right. All right. Um, well, yes, there's a bunch going on. We'll talk about that
Uh, but I guess we can take a quick break and we should because i'm gonna piss myself in this chair
Yep. Yep. Yep. All right stuff coming up. See you in a bit
All right, um
Completely missed opportunity
for for
On the last bit for kojima to look down and say this is good, isn't it?
Completely whiffed on the bit on that
Yeah, okay. Oh well
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Apparently what's upon a time?
the
term electrocution was only used for like fatal cases
versus
Getting uh shocked. I think like when you're gone giving you a little zappy zip
Yeah, you can if you get shocked and survive and it's just a shock then that's a shock
but like
When you got electrocuted it was like a cause of death
And uh, I don't know I read this and it might be some internet bullshit, but apparently
It just got used colloquially enough that you could just use it to describe the process of
You know getting getting zapped
Yeah, my dad used to work at a place the guys would get zapped every now and then and
He's old and he would just call it uh
Being a fucking dumbass and zapping yourself like an idiot
You know
We were just talking about headphones for a bit and there's something I need to mention
I don't know if it's even fits into this week, but I'm on the west coast now. I'm in the pacific northwest and
Uh people out here are different man
People out here are real real fucking different
The other day
Maybe it was like 10 days ago, but I'm reminded now page and I were driving through the countryside and exploring and looking at all the nice shit
And we happened upon a nice big public park
in which about
20 or 30 people were engaging in what I now know is called a silent disco
In which they were taking up a portion of the park
all wearing their headphones
and pretending they were at a club
Dancing in the morning to dead silence
And I wanted to walk into the ocean and die
well
I have never
I have never in my life
been
so
dramatically hit
with physical manifestations of cringe in my life
Eyes closed doing all that swaying hippie bullshit
Yeah, la la were they listening to the same song?
I fucking doubt it
Well
Um, that's the community. That's that's how you get
That's how you get to to know your neighbors and that's how you get to feel welcome. You know by having little little fun
Little fun facebook events. Remember when the remember the days of public facebook events and gatherings?
Yeah, that's what's going on there
Well, you don't want to fit in you don't want to you don't want to know
You don't want to introduce yourself walk into the ocean and die
You
It's one of those situations where I go to open my mouth and page like shut up
Because she knows
Oh, yeah
Oh, yeah, and we're like we're not far enough away
that
Like if one of them popped ahead like they wouldn't I'm like, but I'm like I'm like vibrating
with like
Shit to say that's some normal people having a good time
That is no no, it's not. Yep. Yep. If it's if that's the community
They're having a good time and you're welcome to join them and show that you're you're down for a good time, too
I recently do you follow Justin Wang on twitter?
Uh, yeah
Okay, so Justin Wang's twitter is like the worst twitter in the world. I'll never stop following it
um, he retweeted
He retweeted somebody
With the with the phrase confidence is disgusting
Yesterday and it was a bunch of 20 year old standing around on a staircase playing guitar and singing random songs from the 90s
and aughts and like all head bopping and shit and I
I wish that a bomb went off underneath them
like I was
repelled
Like it's it's disgusting like we'll have like
Vibing and feeling yourself needs to stop having a good time needs to go
Yeah, it does. Mm-hmm. Okay. It need you know, stop it
Shut up
Uh
Damn fucking worst. Yeah
Yeah, yeah, I I hope I hope that the
The place you're moving to has a clean view of the ocean from the top view of the lighthouse
I hope that I hope that you are
Highly elevated into your tower where you can lock those doors
And just chill forever
Looking down from above
fucking
It's just uh
people
Yell at that. Yell at that cloud. I'm right there of like seeing people having a good time in an annoying way
I'm just like stop it
Fuck that stupid cloud. The fact that you're having a good time is annoying to me
You
Decided to introduce more green and sun into your life. I am I'm very out of place. This is what's outside
This is what's outside waiting for you
Dude, I was dude. I was we were walking down the street the other day and I said, uh, because that we walk at we
Walkin out the street and sometimes
Out here the the the fucking crosswalk doesn't even have a stop sign
And it's like oh no people will stop
and I'm like
So I'm standing we're walking across and I'm like, you know, it's wild to me as somebody from Montreal because like
A crosswalk doesn't mean shit. I can't believe people actually just choose not to hit me with their car
And I said, you know as somebody from Montreal, I saw like four people on the sidewalk go snap their heads towards me
And just like stare a little bit and I'm like
Okay. Yeah, right right. I am the weirdo here
I'm the problem. You are the problem
So you can continue to be the problem
Or you can let it bleed in a little bit. I'm just what I'm gonna do what I'm gonna do
Is I'm gonna feel the way I feel
But instead of saying it out loud, I'm just gonna crush it way down
Deep where I can't see it anymore
And then one day 11 years from now
I'm just gonna have a tirade over some kid kicking their football on my lawn
And like have a heart attack and die
And and that's that's the good way
to deal
with this
You know, these are the same people that are setting up those fun little shops that are uh,
You know, uh self managing, right? These are the same fun people that are
Doing all the things you like about the area that's near you. Do you do you want to hear do you want to hear like the absolute
Like east coast fucking brain rot
Is we're in a we're in a tiny little
Stand that has pies just sitting around and it's like take some and here's the the the e-transfer link
just send us the money and
I
Literally cannot help myself
But I will pick up
The pie and I'll pick up the piece of bread and I'll pick up
the the Danish
and I will
Stand there and look at them and go okay
This pie is 30
And this one is five and this one is seven. So that's 42 dollars. Okay remind me
We're gonna pay that when we go home
Because in my mind
Even though there's no camera. There's a camera
And they're watching it to make sure I don't just walk in and take it and leave
Even though that's how it works
literal pie theft pat
Yeah, literal pie theft is this where it comes back to my point is is I'm standing there going
I want to make sure that they feel that I'm not stealing the pie because
Because ever because food out in the open means you're stealing it
Like acclimating is weird
So like I said the same
uh attitude and mirth
that that has uh
Uh
The the confidence and the niceness to set up a little pie stand where you can e-transfer the costs
That's the same type of person that's having a little disco dance party in their headphones down at the park
Same people the the ultimate is that we turned into a farm at one point that was having a little
thing for sale
And then we walk up and then there's this fancy bread that I've never seen before so we tried it
What basically once a week we go find a farm stand and we try fancy bread or fancy pie or whatever
And we're talking to the lady there and she's explaining how the the bread the the wheat is blessed
And we're like what pardon she's like oh so-and-so
always you know before uh before the harvest she she brings down the the group from the retreat
And uh, they do they do like a like a classical like a seance or like they do a blessing and it's like you know
Mother Earth nature and and and you know, that's that's why the the bread is so good and and like yep. Yep. Yep
We're standing there
And I'm being
overwhelmed
By the feeling that I'm being fucked with
Just
Overwhelmed
Right, it's not a curiosity
When was the last time you've had to do
a polite
A polite prayer
Before eating at someone's house or something like that
When's the last time someone was like we're going to say grace here and you just have to you're just present for it
29 years
Well, really you haven't been like in a in a polite grace situation. I've literally had to do it once
Okay
Because that's a learned skill is that my it was at my friend's jonathan's house because he was a jahovah's witness
Yeah, that's a learned skill
You might meet some neighbors who you're like, oh, yeah, come over for dinner. We're all gonna have a good time
You know and uh, you get to fix yourself a plate you sit down and they go, all right
So we're just gonna bless the food real quick and then you have decisions to make
And you you get to you get to choose how much to
You know to lean in to lean out to distance
Do you close the eyes? Do you put the hands up if you want to go all in?
You can go hands up and eyes closed if you really want to signal where you're at in your journey
You know, this is the maximum or you can just
Stand with your eye your hands in your pockets and and eyes open if you pull your phone. No, I would
Oh, I unless if you count like uh, uh shrine
Prayers out in japan one. Oh, yeah, I guess it is places
Then then it would have been that because it's like, you know, I don't believe it
You do it when you when it's polite. Yeah, no, not not those
I'm talking about the one where you're socially pressured with a group of people that probably want to hold your hand
So, you know what you know what the problem is with the story?
I just told you and she's explaining to us how the the hippies form the commune to
Do the bread the magic with the fucking spirits
um, the problem is
Is that the bread fucking rules?
And it was super good and it was one of the best pieces of bread. I've ever had in my life
And now I'm now I'm sitting here
going like
Fuck does it
Did it help?
Every time we ask for kosher food. It's amazing
Have you got kosher food's incredible every time I go for kosher food for to keep it simple on the on the rules
It's it's super good. It's super good. Have you had Passover food?
Yeah, it's great latkes and fucking applesauce and the
All of it amazing. It tastes so I can really fucking good
I can make what I can make a decision right either
Blessing the ingredients is imbuing magic taste to food
or
The type of people who are gonna get a gang of 20 to sing over some bread while it's being made
Are the type of people who give a goddamn shit about making good food
Because they're going to every length to improve the quality
I'm I'm gonna go with that one
I mean if you're buying into that then you might as well
Uh, if you it's too late if at that point you might as well just jump on the train with uh
Metallica whiskey which is whiskey that they play metallica to it
As they prepare it
So so I made the bourbon
These two stories combine in this awful way as I'm standing here watching the fucking hippies
Dance in silence near the ocean like the most cringe worthy pieces of shit
I've ever seen and go are these the people that were summoned to make the bread taste good with the magic?
I don't know
If it tastes bad. Well, what you need to do is is taste from taste some blasphemous bread
And and do a real quality check on that
Right if you can find
Someone around the corner that also makes something similar, but you know that their their life is not right with christ
Um, try some of that bread and see how it tastes, you know, well, no you're saying pagan communist shit
So that's actually not christ, but either way
either way
Someone that's that's and it's missing the the the crystals and the reiki spirits in their life, you know
It's uh, yeah west coast is different people out here
People it's did the to build different. It's very
It's uh, it's very weird
I'm having culture shock. Anyway, that's correct
Okay
You want to talk about street fighter woolly?
Uh, yeah, sure. Um
Let's do that. So street fighter six has been fully revealed
and
I mean
listen the
The number one thing anybody wants to know when a capcom fighting game is announced is the fucking roster
And for that reason, I don't think they've announced a single fighting game and not had a leak
Since 2009. I think the roster of every single capcom fighter leaked out early
In similar methods to this sometimes it was just a list
Sometimes it was just a description or a or a video or a screenshot
But my personal favorite was ultimate marvel where the screenshots were the characters were just all up on the website website
website jpegs
Sometimes there's cross-tech in where the models are sitting untextured on the disc
But no matter what game there have always been leaks because people need to know
What characters are going to be in the fucking game? It's the only thing that matters
So we've got we've come a long way dealing with capcom where capcom of old
of much old would go
dead silent just not talk about it at all
or
Shut the fuck up. Mm-hmm or
Uh, my personal favorite
was
Here's a here's some polls about what characters you want coming to street fighter 4 as dlc when the roster is like
Already been decided for over a year. Mm-hmm. Now we've come
The the method of telling people to shut the fuck up
It doesn't work obviously, but when you go for it
Usually if they're like you're showing pictures, you're not supposed to see or videos or trailers
You're not supposed to have you you are revealing an asset that is our property. They're going to go down that road, right?
Yeah
If you happen to just have a screenshot in your own trailer
That has a list of names on the tournament mode and max a million pulls out a magnifying glass
And stares at it and pulls names off of that list
You have no one else to blame but yourself
Uh-huh
So before any of the other confirmed character are leaked or anything there was the list from the trailer itself
And then oops, I accidentally dropped the photo of the entire roster
And it's just right there now
I will say
We've come a long way
Actually going out and saying yo, so we've seen a lot of stuff lately
Uh, thanks for the positive reactions
Genuine improvement very surprised a lot of us saw things we weren't supposed to see here in in the metro city
Yeah, yeah
um
Now that being said there's there's still the actual there's the reveal and then there's uh everything that that that came afterwards
Couple details couple plot things yadda yadda
um
As a whole on the presentation with it
Um, setting my expectations for like re engine realism. I was hoping that uh, the best way to
Uh, the we talked about it when the first reveal showed off the the ryu and luke
But I was basically like, okay
This is the direction we're going in and it's one that's going to lose some of the
um
Aki man or nishitani style
full-on art, um
Uh, like the the character designs that come straight from that art right there aren't right
So re engine leans itself to realism
Understanding that and putting that expectation in I was hoping I was like, okay the way to
Try to keep the flavor then would be to have
Liberal use of the ink lines the splashes the color the effects whichever version you want to go with be at
pencils the ink
whatever and uh
Thankfully they did do that. So when I saw the amount of the when I saw the visual presentation being like bold and
very aggressive with the graffiti look in certain
Um activations of the mechanics and stuff like that like the focus attack coming out and shit
Um, I was like, okay cool. That's what I would like to see if we're going realism because um
It it helps hold on to some identity, you know
mm-hmm
For the visuals, I'm in this weird place where I like the new setting. I like the general look
I like the graffiti a lot
I like the use of color
But I I can't stand the way the realistic characters look
I feel like they look like like knockoff tech and characters
Hmm, like I don't I I strongly dislike it
It doesn't bother me. I think they I think they look like
High-detailed characters
It's not I'm not taking it as a
um
I would prefer if they were more stylized because I just happened to like seeing
An artist's interpretation
Yeah, I would prefer going more towards
Exeter strive than Mortal Kombat. Yes, but um, but I but I don't I'm not taking it as a negative in this in this
Uh
Case because I I think it looks all right, you know, I don't mind that
um
I
Also, I'm happy to see
a
return to the street
in Street Fighter
Um
As well the you know third strike was obviously like the third strike soundtrack is
Legendarily just fucking
Tip-hop and it's it's awesome and the whole thing is one is, you know, the best sounding Street Fighter game
um
In this case, it's been a part of the promotional material often
But the actual game would drop and not have any of that, right? So don't forget that
four
five
And now six all have
Early trailers that show you like hip-hop and like play, you know that kind of feeling
But when the game drops itself, it doesn't actually commit to that as much
Now that being said this one's gonna have to because
Like a graffiti is like a primary visual motivator. Yeah, I certainly do hope so
Um
Because there's there's that part of it and then of course like it's that and then there's the casing that is like the
The recognizable ost, you know of the themes of all the characters. Those are always going to be there
You're not going to miss out on, you know, like the the swelling themes of Ryu and Gile and all these recognizable tracks over the years
But um for the rest of it, I certainly do hope that they kind of keep that feel to it
Um also on aesthetics, um
Obviously logo change
Much better logo
Not surprised to see that logo improvement still is not the brand that we get from the old street fighter
You know yellow orange red like very loud fiery combat text
Um, but it is nonetheless
It is a big improvement over the the first one they showed and i'm someone who
Doesn't mind graphic design aesthetic approaches to things so on a personal level
I I I like what they got here and I think it's way better. Yeah, it's a huge improvement
Thank god they did
Um
We can take it case by case so you know what's not a huge improvement
Mm-hmm
Fucking luke
Oh my god
Oh my god
The fact that his fucking official art is him doing the fucking Guy Fieri flavor town fucking pose
Is like luke sucks so fucking bad
Um
Where was the thing uh hold on a second
There was a bit
That I saw where they're just like
Oh god, fuck him. We hate him even more now because in his profile
He's a p.m. C
Uh
No, but what did it say I think oh his oh he likes wacky shirts and his dislikes are horror games
Yeah, so yeah, people are just like fuck luke
He hates horror games, dude
It's
Hey, man
I I'm I'm I'm fine. I'm fine with it. He here's the thing, right?
So when I saw so I don't particularly like jamie either, but I think he's fine. I like you, right?
I think he's fine. He doesn't
Doesn't I I could take him or leave the hair down vodka as it looks really sick
But I have a very active vicious hatred of luke. Mm-hmm, and I was like very strongly worried
I was like, oh god, please not a whole fucking sub roster of luke's
And now that we have the whole roster
Wow, it's just luke
No, it's just him. No, he's so trash. Well, here's the thing though because
No, there is another character and this also
Predicates how you're going to feel about luke when ed was revealed
The way you feel about ed will determine how you also feel about luke if you're down with
I feel like ed has a similar
energy and like a lot of people that disliked ed in his um in his uh original
reveal
Uh, we're also disagree strongly. I think ed looks cool. Oh interesting. Okay. I think all of ed's costumes look cool
Although it's a starter once anyway. I feel a lot of people that hate uh, hate luke also hated ed
and
um, you know, well, there's a thing where it's just like it's another fucking blonde boy character and street fighter
But then there's like the outfit which bunch people just didn't dig
um
I
liked the the hoodie version
Uh, especially and in that same sense
I'm down for and like now this new one as well is a little more like yeah, it's not it's not the the young commander outfit
It's the the like kind of street wear
um, I think that's it's cool and uh, yeah, it's the same shit
I've said before but I'm just like I feel like
It's been weird how
mma representation has been lacking in street fighter. So I'm down for that
I'm just I'm just sitting here watching everybody like hate on me because I actually like ed
Or like his design and like I'm sitting there and I'm like trying to think of like what is it?
And then I see somebody literally say well pat likes it when the character wears a hat and they're right
The fact that ed wears a hat makes him cool. You like a hat. Okay. Okay. That is good
um
Yeah, now for me like
The purest coolest version
Uh of what luke could have been is essentially just grappler backie. Really what is what I want to get or uh,
Tendo from uh king of fire. Well guy. Tendo is grappler backie. That's why I'm just cut cut to the chase on it
right
We don't need to talk about jonathan joe star when we can talk about kenshiro like
Just I like a grappler backie of sorts
Is the energy that I really want and like and want to see exist in street fighter because that type of mma fighter
Is a big part of what fighting is today, but it just doesn't exist there, right? I have I have to I like this is
This is my projection
But it feels to me that like we're gonna put mma
The new thing into our game and we're gonna make sure that it's the most unlikable fuck boy that's ever been in street fighter
Because that's what we think of mma. You know, I just yeah
I don't think it's that bad. What did I but when you put a picture of him right next to ninja
We go fuck. Yeah, he looks like ninja. He's got the same parrot face and everything, you know
Um like the reason why luke is still fighting all these years later is because he went broke because his apes got stolen
Fucking god damn it. I by the way, you know looks so much, you know, it's hilarious when we're playing mass effect and joker is
Seth oh, yeah
Joker what happened to your apes
You know what my favorite part about everything to do with seth green
Was I was streaming in the uh seth greens the sad because his apes got stolen and somebody in the chat goes
Oh, no, not seth green. I never thought he am like, yeah, you did
What are you talking about? You never thought that seth green would buy some stupid
apes you're kidding yourself
But um, yeah, no, I I'm still like i'm fine with luke, man
I think uh, I think that works
um
Ryu
Interesting, so i'm like looking at it. I'm like man those I can't believe his and he's not barefoot. That's wild
but the the
Originally the shawl over him. I was like, I don't know about that aesthetically
um
But it's a goken oro thing
Exactly and once reggie pointed that out. I was like, oh fuck. Okay. Yes. No
Actually that makes sense
And it's a signifier of him overcoming the struggle and he no longer is is he's defeated the satsui nohado
And this is what that that exemplifies. Okay, totally on board the plot reasons for that to exist to make sense
If it was just an element out of nowhere, I think I'd be yeah, I'd be more questioning about it, but
Meanwhile, they specified more gokin than oro that is to say. Yeah, we move over to ken who went all in on bitcoin and luna
Well, so that's the thing right and and this brings me to uh the the design to plot discussion because
ken has had everyone
In an uproar and it's wild because like I've seen people go like fuck what I hate when you just make people
Uh that are in happily ever after is go sad for no reason
and um
And I look at it and I'm thinking of uh, I'm thinking of well
How do we
Okay, so thank god we've confirmed for one that this takes place after third strike, right way after
My biggest concern was that we'd be still stuck in the pre third strike post five world
That would sure be terrible
But we're moving forward because we see chan li and li fen and li fen it looks at least 16
And in her endings as a kid. She looks like she's about six. So maybe it's been about 10 years, right?
Whatever so everyone from street fighter two is going to be pushing 50 easy. Yeah. Oh, yeah, probably
um
The idea of ken now
Going through his down and out phase is like well
If you really want to look at it. It's like yeah, johnny cage and sonia blade kind of just did this bit
Right. Yeah, and furthermore like fucking mark of the wolves wild wolf terry
became the bomber jacket bum
years ago
So
When I saw the because ken's image leaked out before the whole roster
I legitimately thought it was fake
Because he's pretty much exactly the same as mark of the wolves terry
It's it's kind of nuts how it's really so similar
Yeah, and and i'm thinking that's that's the bit where they're like you're seeing the design cues taken there for sure
I although harata had a funny tweet where he's like it's like
Showing ryu doing a dungeon or no doing a shin show ryu and you're seeing the x-ray for just one frame
You know it's kind of like ah, it's basically like yeah, okay
We see you're taking after the the the other stuff that's that's that's uh, you know your other your competitors here
um, but the the terry bulgard energy coming off of ken here is
Very strong and then yeah part of it where it's like oh Eliza left him and
That's not necessarily true that part. That's that's
Fanfiction well, so I think I came off 4chan
Well, here's the part here's the thing is the reason why I think that's being given credence is because one
There's the artwork and then there's there's a clip of of him in game confirming that artwork is in fact his model
So there's a shot of him in game alongside a shot of cammy doing her ultra or her super
So we know that both of those looks are are confirmed
then
The same person that was leaking those details about
The design of the characters also leaked some plot
In the same post and that post talked about ken being left by Eliza
Right and and it's it also mentioned him
um
Like having a dog tag that was melz and it seems like yeah
I guess she took the kids and left type of thing and he and and and also, uh, I get him
It's all in that realm of speculation, but um, there was something about
Oh, it wasn't it was a different post. Okay. All right. Yeah, dude. I'm telling you that's this that that story thing is not true
Okay, all right
Well, if if that's not true then, uh, all you have is the look which is just him looking kind of down and out
But he's not even bleaching his hair right anymore
Yeah, you can see the roots got fucking roots
Which people uh, just in case you didn't know ken is in fact, he's got black hair
He he bleached bleaches a blonde right that's been a detail
It's one of those funny little details that mean you have been talking about for decades and like
The day finally fucking put it in it's crazy
Mm-hmm
So the whole so the meme that's been going around and stuff with the whole like the broken
bummed out divorcee ken stuff
Um
Yeah, okay
I thought that came from the same post and so that's why it was being treated as more credible
But if it in fact is just that he just looks different, but is actually fine then
We'll see
That changes a lot of what I was about to bring up for me about the divorce ken energy is like in that big leak thing of all the art
He's standing with a visible slouch
Like that that to me he like and he's not doing his hair right anymore
Yeah, and he's he's also he's not super clean shaved, right?
And also for me it's a fun idea because the long ken ryu thing for decades now has been ryu is
functionally homeless
And constantly suffering from go crazy murder people energy and his life's basically a fucking mess
Meanwhile ken's over here with the perfect wife in the shit zillion dollar mansion
And a good kid and he's fucking he looks great and his gi is nice and he's rich
And he's still also winning all of the tournaments that he's entering
Well, so this is the thing
What what's important if you want to go to the plot of these characters is and these are everlasting
Characters that can't have endings because there are brands at the same time
Yeah, but when you're trying to reach something as
resembling a satisfactory conclusion
Uh, you have no further to look
Then ryu final, right? Yeah, because ryu final came out and this thing is basically the story of ryu
um post third strike
coming to the end of his story
and what happens in that for ken at least is very very important to his character because uh ryu
is basically
Off training with oro who's, you know, one of the strongest people on the fucking planet
T trying to try to pass down his his power to somebody that can actually handle it
um, and in the meantime
ken goes off and fucking fights gill and like
Rex him beats gill, right? Well, it doesn't he he he finds his power in the fight
He's losing at first and then he brings it back and does the threat right ken beats the big threat and
Saves the day there and then later
ryu's like what the fuck that's crazy, dude. Like, oh, we've got we we got to fight
We got to figure this out and then they do and ken rex ryu's ass destroys him
Right and ryu's like what the what is happening?
And ken's like basically like okay, so yeah that thing that you're searching for
You know the answer that lies in the heart of battle that you've been trying to find the
Getting your entire fucking life, too
The the satsuinohado and all that that all that struggle the thing you're searching for I found it. It's my family
It's literally my wife and kids. So by the power of mamoru anime rules
Why don't you fucking get laid ryu if I if I put them at the center of my soul
They become my my purpose for fighting and they power me up as I fight on their behalf
Right so family becomes the reason why ken gets stronger and the end of his journey is like
I don't have to do the journey that ryu is on to get the same strength
I can go my own path with my family. You know, right?
Um, and he he fucking crushes it yet again in that scenario as well. You know, um
so uh
that energy then being I guess like
Upturned in some way in this path would be
Odd I'd be curious to know what it would be because like maybe he's just aesthetically looking a little bummy
But things are fine or if things are not fine
Um, if there is any truth to the possibility that he's having marital troubles or something
That would be sad
But it would be like the kind of thing where I hope at least if he starts out that way
He can find his way back home. You know that there can be a journey to
To fixing the problem if he starts out kind of you know in the dumps
also
genuinely if uh, if anything about divorced ken is accurate
It uh with our current roster understanding
Yeah, if for ken's personal journey, it provides an incredibly compelling new final rival
Which is not ryu. It's guile his wife's brother
his brother-in-law
just like
Mm-hmm
Motherfucker, what are you doing showing your face around here? I know what you did
Etc. Perhaps but the thing too there is of course like, you know, there's always the
The the bit where it's like, okay, guile and what about you abandoning your family to to fucking go hunt down
Charlie's killer and all that shit. You're not that great of a family man yourself
Yeah, at which point the obvious rebuttal is yeah, I got him and then I went back
Like yeah, I got him I killed bison perhaps, you know
um
But yeah, so it should be it should be interesting to see where they where they take it here
um, and of course we we mentioned it before but like the
Old bearded ryu actually hot ryu being default. Yay. Good awesome lock it in
Chunli's hair is interesting because like it does
Like it's her face never ages because the makeup is always there, but like her hair
Tuft is now flatter than usual
So she does look older
Just with that one detail. I feel
um
And then uh, yeah, and then the whole roster came out
So first of all yun and yang yun and yang style fighting always great, but break dancing is
like
So the most there's capoeira in the form of elena, but they never had full-on duck king ass break dancing
Yeah in street fighter. So that's that's cool nor drunken master
I think I think it's kind of wild
um
Just how old the characters in street fighter two are in this game that
The children of yun and yang from third strike are now the old people that one of the new guys is looking up to
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm
They and that's great to think about the time
That allows the the the new generation to age. I'm very excited for that possibility
Like the new generation is now old enough to be the old generation and the world warriors are fucking
Dinosaurs. Yeah, by the way
It's very clear now
That calcom has learned its from its mistakes
and the world warriors will
Never
Not be on the starting roster of a street fighter game ever again
You're getting the you're getting the original eight every time that that that much is the four bosses
Okay, maybe not but though that those eight
Well, so the question is is like four bosses sounds like the right number for a shadow lude dlc pack
Oh sure does
You know
Yeah, uh, that is that is that is what you see when you get these characters. Okay
Um, now you're looking at the returning design elements on them as well
And it feels as if the break dancing we saw the break dancing. Sorry the the urban style like the the
Revisions of them that were in that mobile game
Actually, some of those design cues were kind of used in some of these here. Yeah 100
They kept some of that energy which was dope because it worked. Um, I
uh, uh shout outs to uh the the
Uh angriest gamer meme yelling about oh, yeah, uh cammy's pants or whatever
Like she she she's she's looks fantastic
Okay, but also, oh, it's the sensory who's about she's wearing leggings
Did you see chun's scandalous fucking pants in that trailer?
Leggings are a fucking
Leggings are a fucking type of pants yoga pants that were invented to get around
Like skin requirements for sexiness
For the tightest fucking shit in the universe. They it's tacky pants essentially
furthermore the old costume is still there as shown in that clip where she's doing her super
and um, I I'm guessing that there's a thought that like
The the the ESPN not wanting to show Armica in her default costume
Being a dumb thing is something that they probably are thinking about from the ground up here going. Okay
If costume one by default is fine for ESPN
That'll be better than if it's if we have to force an alternative or whatever
You know and I have to like so then you have all all the all the classics, right? So
Um, man, all of the the classic characters redesigns that we haven't seen yet
Are all fantastic
Like dolls him in particular
Just give him a beard. Yep. That's always that's the move done
Um, what's particularly fun is seeing I mean so jury is a winner no matter what like I feel like you can't fail on her design
Like it I completely disagree. I think her design in five was terrible compared to four and six
Ah man, I love a
I think most of her costumes work, dude. I don't know. I I feel like the the four outfit was sick
The biker outfit. I liked it and this one kind of comes in and does a whole new thing a little bit more reminiscent of four
but um
I I I think jury as a character works in a lot of different looks
Um, but Rashid coming back. Oh, it looks great. Fucking awesome
All right, and I'm very happy too because one of the things I was saying before the leaks were out there was that um,
hey
I know returning characters is awesome
But I really want to make sure I want you guys to I want there to be in a like a lot of new characters too, right?
Like new characters become favorites
Before you know it when you give them the chance. We didn't care about Rashid before now. We do
You know, uh, we didn't care about jury now. We do there's ed now. We care
So just new characters be giving getting a shot is always something I want. Um, despite the fact that deep in my heart
Uh, uh
Grown-ass Makoto
It would make me super happy to see
um
DJ looks fun
Right. Yeah
Shocked DJ came back genuinely out of all the old characters
Well, you know got got shunned last time. So, you know, DJ gets a spotlight now after missing out
um
And then akuma looks like what they should have done to begin with last time around
Yeah, akuma really just looks like a do-over from his sf5 design
But it's always the akuma thick question has always been the same. It's like take the shirt off. Give him a beard
Put the gray highlights in
That's it, right?
The third strike, we know how it ends up looking. So just
Add time to the guy who's who's like a fucking woodsman anyway, you know, practically
um
But then you show the new eight, right? So, um
Marissa the giant
Uh buff lady that is centurion outfit
Because she's italian. Yep
Looks like a roman gladiator
I'm down for the muscles. I'm down for the the buff
um
Looks quite defined in that artwork
Uh, as opposed to, you know, like again like she hulk or something from the previous conversations
Uh, yep. I'm very interested in that always a fan. Her hair looks like a
War helmet as well actually
Yeah, it looks like it looks like a centurion helmet. Mm-hmm
Um, you got me me
French I want to say yeah french fighter girl. Um, sure label dude. Yeah looks like it
Originally girl able was like little girl with the big gloves and the and the pigtails, but uh, yeah, this looks like a redo
Let's do that original able design again, but uh pink
It pink this time
Uh, you got fucking uh jp
Another old man handsome daddy design for anyone who wants their daddies
So g know where to be found yet here, but jp seems to have that energy unless that is g
Unless but he's he's no but but the next to him it says russia on the flag, but then there's a question mark
Maybe it's net girl after he got better
Um
If g's world plan worked out and the cues are taking over and they're everywhere
Um, yeah, this could be something related to that the next step of
You know his his his fucking takeover, but either way old man energy is something that the capcom has realized
The the the fans want they want daddy casts
Uh daddy's on the cast so jp's in there
Um ackee as the replacement for a fong like character
Sure looks like girl fong
Looks much better than
Much much better than than oh, yeah, yeah, but i'm expecting, you know poisons and assassin type things and that's all pretty straightforward
And then there's like lily who uh looks to be like yeah, mexican native
Which is
Makes me you're immediately you think of teahawk right because you can go
Uh, you can go mexican without going mexican native specifically, but looking at that i'm guessing there's probably gonna be a relation to teahawk or his village
somewhere in there
Um and kimberley who was at the end of the original trailer
Who's just american girl with with the with the big old tails looks like she's probably gonna do ninja things
I might be like an like maybe in a boogie student or something
um
She's like upside down in that in that uh, uh pose on the on the screen so
Possible
Well, how do you feel
About street fighter six finally adding the first black woman to street fighter ever with kimberley
Wow
You know it's important to break through these milestones
As we specify
That uh, you know there's there's there's black and then there's black of course now the first black woman
Does it necessarily mean the first black woman?
But it definitely means that kimberley is the first black woman
She just happens to not be the first black woman
I think the doubling down that elena doesn't count because she's from africa might be the most insane thing i have ever read in my life
You know
The easy out would have been just let's edit the article and and change it to say the first african-american woman
Right easy right there, but instead they did the opposite the opposite way around
Which makes no fucking sense
Yeah, a little kotaku kotaku article
anyway
Anyway, um
Oh, man. Oh, I fucking spit out my drink. I saw it
You african-american
Uh
Could have been used but instead it went the other way and it's like saying no black does excludes people who are african and it's like, okay
well
That's that's the weirdest way to go, but sure we'll double down on that
Why not?
Um anyway, I I don't know
I don't know regardless though
Um
Yeah, I think uh, I think that's a strong a strong starting roster and then i'm sure there's gonna be the dlc stuff to come
So, you know, I I saw the I saw the the original trailer and like I I could take her leave jamie and I fucking hate luke
So goddamn fucking much. So I was kind of like
Bums not I wasn't I wasn't excited. I was like fine, but it was like seeing that that full roster
I'm very happy with that full roster. That's a good-looking roster. Mm-hmm
And then they then they started to go into the gameplay details
And they went into a lot of system in gameplay details sure did and that's that's my meat and potatoes
That's what I'm looking to fucking chow down on and so yeah
I like now those so characters aside what I'm expecting and and thinking is we're probably gonna see
dlc pack third strike couple third strike characters and like two new ones
DLC pack alpha a couple alpha characters two new ones, you know, like I'm expecting that you could just take those those missing
obvious things and then
Um, you throw time into the mix and then add some new characters as well and there you've got your seasons ready to drop, right?
Okay, mechanically
um
Wow, I was confused at first because I was like, oh, we're doing parries. We're doing focus attacks
And we're seeing v-shifts
So are there gonna be grooves and it's like no we're giving everything
We just decided to bring in every major mechanic from every street fighter game to ever release
And put them all in the same on the same bar
Yeah, and so the later versions of five the updates like especially like post championship edition started to really like show off like, okay
kind of like ex street fighter four characters were um
Omega mode characters were test beds for five
You can see some of the stuff that was a test bed for six in the form of
Like I want to say like five characters on the roster of five have parries, but they're different kinds of kinds
Ryu had a one that was bad initially because it was too slow to come out
And you know the punish was wasn't wasn't worth going for and alex had the one that would go to an attack
Right afterwards exactly right gill gets gets one as well all different tests as to how to make the parry work
Right, um, and then here they've settled on one and we don't know what the timing is going to be
But whether it comes out in one or three frames is going to be very important
There's two timings
They they did come out a little bit the the parry and you can watch the gameplay footage if you like frame by frame it
The the parry comes out quite quickly
But you get different effects based on whether or not it's within a certain window of something hitting you
So there's put the parry out and it stays out and it functions more like a focus attack
Or put the parry out as a parry and then it functions as a third strike parry
Okay, well so that yeah, I so the question so if but like if it comes out
Instantly or if there is a startup to it that makes a difference in neutral that's gonna chew that's gonna
It's gonna make the the the
The competitive scene of that game have a completely different flavor because third strike being what it is
revolves around the parry at high level right it just does
And I saw that
It's interesting because like there was a lot of arguing about sf5 in the long history of it of like it
It makes you want to play it your way in the execution machine against there's not a whole lot of room for player expression
There's a lot of room for player expression when you have all these fucking toys to play with you have got a lot of toys now just
On each one like the parry. Yeah, so the if you have a just frame one, you know response then that's that's you know, that'll be
Useful in battle something slower than that might not be as useful because review players try to make it work
And they couldn't for the life of them figure it out
People are saying that
That max counted it and it's three frames. It's a three frame parry
Okay, well
It's it's worked right back to it where it was 20 years ago. Okay. Well, well, so well, no
Because that that means it's much harder to use in neutral
And that means that review players who basically went fuck this thing. I can't use it properly
Gave up on it and and like talking with reggie about that specifically
He's just like, yeah, if you can't like if it's not a third strike parry essentially
It it feels like you're it's not worth it going for it in the in the way it implemented into review in five, right?
um
Things might change of course, but if that's what we're going with we'll go on the max frame numbers for now back to the nightmare everyone
It's 2001 and you're playing a character. You physically can't hit
okay
so, um
In addition to that, of course, you've got all the other mechanics now
The the wildest thing about them even before going into them is the fact that they use a completely different meter
right, um, the uh, the the break, uh, was it a break system or anyway, um
All of the fucking mechanics
Introduced drive all the mechanics introduced in the drive system are all, um
Uh, there you have your defensive stuff as in their parries that you've got your your fadc
Which is a cancelable dash outside of outside of a
A normal
You've got what is your other focus attack thing, which is just eat drive impact crumble. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm
Um, and then yeah, the wall splatter exactly, but what's wild is ex moves are considered drive
Uh, uh, they cost drive to do
Right, so that means ex moves don't cost normal super mar
That means that you get ex moves for free
When you get furthermore the drive meter is not a meter that you build up as you do things it starts full
And replenishes over time after you deplete it
When you deplete it you go into cool down or burn out mode and we don't know what that means yet
But it sounds like it's bad
along the short of it it use these
Choose them a lot use but but but but here's the here's the issue right and you got to be careful with it
mk11 introduced a similar thing where you had an action
You had a bar that would regen after you used out certain defensive
actions on it
That when you're playing when you're using defensive options that makes sense
You can you can kind of work in a way that is like I fucked up
I'm going to take my my replenishing meter to get out of this situation
But if I fuck up more than once I'm going to be in a dead
I'm going to be in a shitty situation where I have to guess or die right right um
In this if you put offensive options behind a replenishing thing
they have to be
Really carefully balanced because essentially like if you are someone who's got a really good move
That's an ex move and you're kind of like if you got like a young ex lunge punch ready to go
And you have those for free right away start of the round
And then you run out of them. It's almost like well now we've created create a moment where
Um, you have the problem that can exist where if someone is in a temporarily powered up state in a fighting game
And it makes no sense to fight them. We just lame it out and I disengage
Right um the example I use this uh the critical counter system in king of fighters 12 was poorly thought out because uh
It gives you a couple seconds of being super super strong and scary to fight
Where the opponent might as well just not fight you and the last thing you want to happen here is uh, oh
I have time for me to not fight anymore and then the pacing of the match becomes um
You know much more staggered and lame doubt as a result of this replenishing meter
Just being like if I wait back and not if I stop playing the game for a couple seconds
I'll be back to normal create weird paced matches
luckily
Perry's replenished that meter and both characters have full access to all these fucking
zany tools at all times
So it seems uh as well as time now if burnout leads to stun
Which is what i'm seeing there that would be really crazy because that means you're eating
Uh, you know a full bread and butter when you fuck up on a gamble, but don't go too nuts
um
and and
The implementation of how it's paced out can be tweaked to to you know adjust these problems, but it gives me a concern
to create a system where
People might wait to replenish and stop fighting. That's always a big thing you got to worry about when you make fighting
Oh, you mean like the absolute shittiest thing in the universe with third strike where it's like fuck
I need more agus reflectors punch punch punch punch not even that not not meter building not not meter building
um, i'm talking about like that shit
I'm talking about like
Either i'm installed or i'm uninstalled
Time for me to just back up and not fight or the other player being like
If you get one crush counter on me right now there goes half my life
I'm just not going to play until that goes away, right?
anyway, um, so
That seems to be uh, uh, what they're going for the rate of replenishment is going to be a huge factor in whether that problem
I'm discussing comes out
So again, we'll have to see the the the in the gameplay
um other things with the system that are very interesting to to look at is of course, um
the push towards
Easy operation essentially, which is not surprising at all. In fact, it's been there forever as a thing
um
I look at when I look at the simplified control system at first we were worried
It was the only control system because the way you scroll down that list
I was like, uh, oh, is this the only one but it's it's like you have classic and then you've got the new one
um, that's been a thing before
I'm it's nice to see that a lot of people that we've been having this discussion about like easy inputs with and stuff
People are excited to see that and they're like, yeah, I'm down to try that
But the fact that it exists in so many other games and has not really
Done the job of actually
Appealing to people and bringing in new people that use that system makes me look at this and go
It's probably gonna do the same thing, right? I um, I really think that the this particular implementation
Looks really good
It does work
For what street fighter needs and it is street fighter
So it's gonna get more attention than other fighters are but stylish mode exists an excerpt
EO exists in EO
um
F going back to fucking marvel versus capcom one when you pick a character you can pick easy or manual and easy was
double tap a button to do a special and uh, press all three to do a super right?
This has been a thing in so many fighting games and that hasn't really
It allows new players to have that that like point of entry entry
But it hasn't really like converted people or won them over
So this is kind of like not that big a deal
So here's the thing about that. I don't think converting people or winning them over is what really matters
I think capcom wants to make a mass market fighting game and in street fighter
So it's the absolute most mass market fighting game and it has a gigantic single player mode
So they want a game that they can give a people a control scheme where they buy it
And they go cool and they go through the single player content and they finish that and never play a single fucking online match ever
And go cool. I really liked street fighter six. I had a lot of fun with it
Yeah, the uh tech end story mode having the trigger to to have your different mash com auto combos
Um expands upon you know the the the possibilities and then again king of fighters
We saw them doing the same like mash the buttons to get your different enders for your super
um
I think it's nice when you can integrate the two together persona did a pretty good job of that
um marvel versus capcom infinite not so much but persona is probably the best example
Hey, I play persona, but I don't play fighting games and I want to play
The next part of the persona for storyline
Well the auto combo shit means that I can
Model my fucking way through the story mode and on a functional level the auto combos are unique
Buttons that don't exist on the like button on the arcade stick anywhere else
So you could actually use them competitively for a specific purpose dragon ball does the same thing
um
So here yeah, it looks like that's going to be the case, but I think you're going to actually run into an issue where
um
Some people that are going to want to start with the the easy operation mode are going to find that
At a certain point they're going to be somewhat gimped because um, oh a hundred percent
Like besides the fact that you're you know restricted on um your combos and stuff like that
You're all you're restricted in your button layout because it looks like you have three attack buttons strong medium heavy
Sorry, it's light medium heavy and it's going to probably merge punches and kicks together
Right a hundred percent. It's like playing street fighter two on the genesis. Yep
So you're going to have a character that's going to be like, you know, at some point
Perhaps you're going to be like, oh, I want to do better things. Maybe I should switch over to the classic mode
um, if there is a nice
uh
Carpet rolled out for you to kind of like ease you over and try that out that'd be cool if it's worked into the system
I believe it's called the world tour mode if if the world tour mode does its job, right?
um
and and then
The other thought which is looking at world tour which world tour back in alpha three. That was good shit
um
Seeing you walk around the third person in a fighting game not the first time shout outs to tech and force mode
Shout outs to combat whatever adventure
Uh shout outs to a virtual quest. We've seen that all done before as well. Could be interesting could be bland
It depends on how populated and living the world is depends on how much there is to do if it's an hour of
if they took um the
Street fighter five story mode and just made it like now you walk to the next cutscene that's going to suck
That's not going to be interesting. Yeah. No, there there is absolutely a per like a perfect existing
Uh template for this and it's the moral combat uh six conquest mode conquest
Where you moved a little man around and went on a whole fucking journey
But even if you do that moving the man around can't just be a little four hour thing and then you're done because that's not going to help
Get that single player appeal. They're looking. No, and here's the thing, right? So
Uh, they show in the trailer in world tour you're fighting some dickhead
In a in a and you're wearing a hoodie and it's like right. Yeah, but you're like some dude
Yeah, which means that okay, you'll be fighting a bunch of some dudes
And it means that the cast will be the boss fights of that game
Yep, also you learn to show you can and you used it in the overworld
So you can probably then go in customize your move set if we end up with a deaf jam fight for new york style
You know set your moves up and whatnot. No, I don't think I don't think that's how it's going to work
I think what's going to happen is you're going to pick your creative character and make them and then go
Your creative character fights like blonka
Maybe right that's the soul caliber's answer to the situation and by doing that
Soul caliber allows you to then play your goofy ass looking character in an online environment and not worry about the the balance, right?
Yeah, but if they didn't do that if they wanted to allow you to customize their moves and make a
Full-on like I said fight for new york or or a me fighter or you know any of that shit
um
That can work in one context and I can see it being
The way they go if you want to keep single player people around
And if you want to have the problem of people putting the game down after fighting arcade mode story mode
One or two matches online getting beaten then being like fuck this. I'm not interested anymore
You can go into a custom character that levels up gets stronger with all the bullshit items fucking dress up charms gems
Whatever and furthermore you can have them fight against other people's custom characters online
But you only fight against those other customs in that mode not real people
And then the other mode with the rest of the roster is over here and there's a distinct
Online for for world tour and online for the regular for the rest of the I don't think that's gonna happen
I think they're gonna do the soul caliber one
It just seems so much easier
But at the same time they don't show us what that that world tour of fighting actually looks like personally
Well nice when I see world tour
My brain goes I want this shit to play like world tour that mode fucking ruled because every fight you did in that was bullshit
It was stupid shit. You want to fight four phalongs in a row with half health?
You want to have infinitely regenerating help but go through 12 chunlies?
Stupid stupid shit if it does end up being dress up, right then you're gonna um
Like the level of dress up you see on tech end characters is is
Insane extreme as well, right? So both soul caliber and tech and our representative of like maximum customization
That will work, but it probably would not hold
As many people's interest as the sense of progression from
Having their character get the latest whatever gem and load out shit
Well, that's the thing in world tour you are equipping your character with buffs
Oh, and but but to then use that in an online environment against someone else's character with buffs essentially, I don't I don't think
Netherrealm has been trying very hard to get that working for the last couple games
They really wanted, you know
So variations was a thing and then they wanted the like other
Customization to be a part of your thing
But like the competitively people are like dude
We just want these three that we can use because the rest of this is just getting it gets crazy and wild when you're micro
Editing move by move
And then the armor and equipment and injustice same kind of idea
so
They showed off like what not to do with that feature
And and I think as but I think like the main
The main thing is just like if you just separate it and the only thing you fight are wildly
Customized people just complain nonsense
Then you create a reason for that single player
Who's looking to keep playing to come back for months and months and months, right?
They're going to fight somebody who's way crazy op because they've got the fucking
unstoppable fucking fist of gokin on their character and
Oh, shit. That just feels busted. How do I get that?
You can then just you know have a nice little for fun mode of wild unbalanced dress up
And then the the main thing is still there, you know
I legitimately believe that
That it's it's going to not only not be this but it'll be the opposite of this
I think the character that they show off in the world tour mode as
Man with a hoodie covering his whole head
is the character
And you'll be able to pick fighting styles, but like
I don't know. I can't see this this online custom creator
The bluff thing it just it just it just it depends on how hard they go on that, you know
I mean people coming away from that feeling the way they do with a dark souls pvp experience
Would be
A proportion of freaks play dart those games for pvp
Certainly certainly, but I just all I'm saying is that like if they're trying to figure out how to reinvent this genre
And fix this problem and but I know all the shit we talk about all the time
And you want to lean into other genres and do kind of what they're doing with stuff
Giving yeah, like like giving people a place to to go nuts with that style of gameplay
Would be one potential solution
I would say that the big solution is they need to so they they're clearly going to have a big online push
Because they we see like we see the largest
stadium fucking
Wander around it menu
In fighting games to date. You just get a tiny piece of it
Um, it needs to be like stripes floors the floor system is a better system than ranked
Yes
Floors are good floors are good until floor 10
Floors work
Excellently floors nine and down right more floors and floors. Let's say it's 20
And and floors 15 to 20. No, no, but but the wire the baby input floors have a problem when you hit a high enough
Thing where it it it it falls apart
um
If you can still queue for a normal ranked match that would be
Ideal and then if you have the ability to go down to
Like beginner layers and sort of like choose where you want your point of entry that would help new players a lot
But the there should still be a overall rank me in
Check my elode whatever the fuck and put me up against the next person
Who's at my approximate skill level because I would I would agree that the absolute most important thing is getting into matches as quickly as possible
The strive problem with the floors is that it feels amazing up until you get to 10
And then it flattens into nonsense
And then from that nonsense you are in a room with people whose skill levels are like
Like literally the difference between like someone who's like first week on the game
And they versus someone who's like ranking
In in top 32 on a regular basis
And it it has no consistency to it. And then of course you've got the the the the exam
which
People can find ways to fucking exploit the exam. You think they can pick out certain matchups and go
I don't want to ever fight this character
I'm only going to go through the exams by targeting this type of opponent
And then they do that and then they get and then you know, and then once you're in celestial
You're now again, you're in this giant clusterfuck, but it doesn't actually
accurately represent where your skill level is once you hit that
Like proficient level
So the floor design
Like i'm telling you man, like it really works for the beginning and it fucking falls apart to the point where
So most people then just
They hit the park
So would you just say like just your standard?
Just like feed me into ranked because my issue with with that with sf5 is that my time between matches became like
Multiple minutes
Even after like a couple hours of play
Like it was it would be like i'm trying to find somebody for you to fight
That's a similar level and i'm sitting there waiting for like five six seven eight minutes
per match that doesn't rematch
You can either have
a
normal ranked system that begins at floor 10
or
you can
um
Create tons of floors
But tons of floors even if you expand it to a hundred floors
It's still not going to avoid the problem of especially if you put exams along the way
It's not going to avoid the problem of people sniping their matches, right? It's not going to avoid the problem of of
You know and then and and like of course you're you're going to have flattened out layers wherever there's an exam
So you need a way to avoid that entirely to make it legitimate, right?
You need to have a mode where you can have a blind double a double blind match
That is uh based on you being approximately similar estimated ranking of somebody and um
I don't mind if that ends up being gated behind a short journey up the floors so that the new players can still feel
something
I I would good about where they want to land
Or you can separate it and have it be like ranking is ranking
But like you can go you can pick a journey up until that default point
um, but just recognizing that new players benefit from floors and um intermediates
Really fucking don't so why not just do floors for the babies and then once you hit the top of the floor
Instead of having the celestial thing just have regular fucking matchmaking if that works. I'm okay with that
I'm okay with that. Um, you know people that
Make it up those people that are like decent will get through them in two seconds and it won't be a big deal at all
But essentially it's like you're you're you're like training online
Um
Yeah, so like I mean take me for example, right as as many people
Are pointing out correctly right now that I shouldn't even be allowed to talk about fighting games because I suck so much shit
However, I was able to get to the fucking top floor within like a week
Because I remember how to play fighting games at a base level at a base level you don't get there at exactly and you get there
At your own speed, right?
Um, and then there's the lockout so that you can't go further back down depending on where your skill is displayed
But the first couple I think you can if you hit so if you're up to level three
I think you might be able to go back down or whatever
But yeah a hybrid system can definitely work here as but the but the floor 10 that exists where the system just continues
It flattens everything out is trash
Um, and if you hit floor 10 and then you get to now just queue up double blind normal ranked
We're all good. We're all good
so
I think the obvious so I mean we haven't mentioned it yet, but like man
I will I will cry tears of piss
If they somehow fuck up the netcode again
I haven't said the word rollback once talking about this game
And I kind of don't want to because I want to just I want to just live in a world
Yeah, I don't want to talk about rollback at all in regards to Street Fighter 6 because I just want to live in a world where
You'd be fucking insane to release it without functional rollback end of story
Moving on because there's there's two versions where it's like it's it works as expected
And uh, we go yeah, it works and that's literally the entire conversation
Or it does not work as expected in which the entire conversation is I can't fucking believe it
You know, well you're right like that's that's where I'm at on it is it's just like oh cool works great or it doesn't are you serious? Wow
We are we are we are drowning in choices choice examples of really good fucking implementation
I don't even want to talk about it with this game. Just unless it's like
When people complain about the netcode whoever's the director goes well, we've made a huge single player mode for you
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yeah, yeah
Um, they always and then herrata retweets it and goes we're bringing one to Tekken too shut up
They always do it proprietary so they definitely don't reach out and do ggpo
But they showed that mvcis has a working version of it. So fucking just do that and leave us alone. All right. Let's do that
Okay, great. Um
So yeah, uh, that's what we're kind of seeing overall for now
um
The other feature being uh, real-time commentary, which is goddamn hilarious and quite very funny
I said it when I put up my initial impressions, but it's like
This feature lives and dies on the yipe's dlc
end of story
If you do not have a pack made
Which is yipe's hype
You're fucking you're fucking up and furthermore once it comes to pc modders are just gonna do it anyway
So talk to him
And if he's on board pay the man for the yipe's hype pack that'll just be the winning fucking pick from now on
shit woolly
There's so much fucking audio of us
If somebody wanted to they could easily make fucking dlc packs of us as the announcer
There are literally tournaments. I have commented with
Exact street fighter commentary quips available for use in archive on the internet everywhere. Yes, that is entirely possible
Also, I should note if you want to talk monetization or whatever like dota
Fucking sells like a shit zillion fucking announcer packs
Do you want fucking adam jensen or fucking rick and morty to announce your goddamn match?
Oh, but that's just the countdowns and stuff, right?
Ah, it's it's the kill stuff. It's the that whatever so it'd be more expensive
yeah, no this is more way more in depth because it's the live play-by-play and
um
That shit is actually like all kidding aside
If it helps people think about and learn about things they didn't know about fighting games
That'd be fucking incredible, right? So what I want what I want is is the the final character in english
Is the alpha 3
guy
Let's come back
Yeah, and just is scouting his goddamn nonsense about size and strength
You teched that throw, but can you tech?
your heart
What
That's making any fucking sense. Yeah, or the cvs2 guy really. Yeah. Yeah sneak sneak attack at the start of a second round
What's up with that?
um yada garasu did bring out the announcers early and first
um
That there was definitely a couple examples of this but in terms of like intelligent play-by-play that says
Oh, you're at the range where this usually works
And you know he needs to watch out for that. Oh shit spd range. Be careful sticking out a button might get you thrown
That's
Legitimately helpful. Hey the the japanese announcer nuki. That's his name, right?
Is he the guy fucking losing his mind over those old third strike videos? No, that's kokujin
um
nuki's a classic
commentator for for
Japanese tournaments. It's kokujin is the one that you want though. You want the
And then and freaking out and laughing at the at the yeah, that's you know, the the makoto touch of deaths and shit like that
You want the uh
Ah
You know like how about it doesn't not yeah, just he goes it like you're thinking kokujin. That's that's good shit
um
But nuki gets mad hype though
as well
um
You go back to the classics and and and uh, yeah, there's nothing about and also they're gonna do it in 23 languages apparently, right?
Oh, is that like that's what I saw. Yeah, I saw that they they they showed off english and and japanese
But they also said there'll be support for 23 total announcers
From a wide variety of languages
Which will definitely have a a really interesting feeling of i'm gonna
Oh subtitled to 13
Okay, because I wanted to like slap it into polish and be like, I don't know what he's saying
But he seems very excited
I mean that'd be incredible to reach out to the communities in every fucking area and get people on board for that
That'd be really sick, you know get ken bogard for france and and there's definitely local celebrities in in each uh each scene
But yeah subtitled then a little fine. That's fine
um
But no, please make sure you have fun with it
Please make sure you do things like get get people like yipes get involved
You know get chris matrix get the whole crew get li chung
um
Gascinated to see how much voice is in these things
If they're trying to emulate watching a broadcast it would have to be fairly constant, right?
um
Talk about the life lead talk about the spacing talk about the meter never play those old wwf attitude games
Stone cold how how busted that fucking commentary was stone cold lands a stutter on
Dilo brown
Oh my god
I can't believe it
This guy really got hit
Wow
What a pin
Can they check can they can they have the no commentary option be like dav lang's ghost?
And it's just silent
out of respect
I I really I just want to make sure that they have it programmed in that like when you do anything resembling a guinegian
There is a pre-programmed a a a for each hit and then you fuck up and it goes oh
You know like you could have we were we were we were fucking like like laughing about it on the clip
But it says like you can literally have a commentator that is just
FGC hype
You're right. Yeah, where like people are just it's just a crowd popping off to everything you do
If you if you hit an ex move, it's just like undetermined screaming
Every once in a while
You know that's somebody's getting
Like just just have fun with one of those packs, man
Sell it. It'll make a million dollars on fucking dlc
I that's how you take this feature to the next level lean in
So we're talking about all this stuff with the Street Fighter 6 and the thing that stands out the most to me
Is that I remember talking to you about Street Fighter 5 long ago on the podcast and it was like just get it out
The core fighting is good
All the extra features don't matter
I said that out loud
And I'm a big enough man to understand
That that was an absolutely fucking brain dead position
To everyone on the planet
Other than the psychos who are crazy about Street Fighter
Just brain dead bad launch they hated it didn't work out
um
And now
We're looking at Street Fighter 6 and it's like it's a fucking starting roster of like
24 or something like that. We don't know if that's the starting roster, but I certainly hope it is. I assume it is
Hey, look, there's a gigantic super huge single player campaign. There's the announcing mode
There's baby controls for new players, etc
Yeah, I mean, you know
What does somebody who
isn't getting
like
Dozens and dozens of hours of gameplay out of online only
Going to enjoy right like literally hundreds of hours to be extracted from just playing ranked matches is
Is there for those who are
You know down to go down that road, but for those who aren't
What is there?
What's interesting?
Is it a basic bitch do five combos and call it a day?
you know a challenge mode or or
What you know and so like it seems like the intention with this trailer, especially being
50 percent not
Game not fighting games not fighting
You know seems to be like hey guys
We are really trying to give you a reason to play this even if you're not looking for
The full competitive experience, which again, I understand, you know, it's it's a it's a whole new fucking world
Street Fighter represents the premiere of what fighting games are usually when it comes out or it's supposed to
underlined supposed to
ArcSys has been handily taking that crown
for quite a while now, but
when
um street fighter decides to
Uh give you a reason to pay attention to something that's not the pure fighting game part of it
I
Like a lot of veterans will look and go like okay, but
And it's like if it can get new players to stick around
It's worth it
Right. So here's the big question
What is this game gonna cost?
I
Feel like since we are looking at an explosion of features
This will be a regularly priced retail game. Yeah
That may or may not
Have a free version at launch or later that does not have any of the shit that we're talking about right now
They clearly made five to be potentially free and never pulled the trigger on it
Seems like they wanted the option to decide
At the last minute to do it or not
Here
As we just saw demonstrated with something like multiverses
Uh, you know, this is gonna you we we've talked about why free is the answer, right?
The the features are massive and inexpensive and there's a lot of them
And it seems like it would be way too much of a package for them to just throw this
All at you and say here we'll make money on the cosmetics
I hope
That despite the fact that this looks like a full price game and and I would be very surprised to see that not be the case
I hope someone internally is fighting that fight to con to convince them
like
That if you're going to go down this road
Have a version that people can just jump in and play with the full roster, right? If you create a second version
That is it's not the same as
Having it fully free to play
But I hope someone's having the conversation because nothing grows your numbers like that
end of story
I can like I could see a version of the game in which
No world tour
If you if you want it for free
You have your rotating cast of three characters of the full roster
Buy whatever characters you like and it works like a free to play game
And if you want to buy the world tour later if you want to buy this later you add it on to it
Or you could just buy the fucking game as a game and just get all of it
The problem with releasing a secondary free to play version later
Is that the hype explosion of like the brand new game
Being spread via word of mouth is only going to happen once
Right. Yeah, the the second version that's free to play that comes out a year or two later
Does not get as
Disgust as it does on launch when everybody's telling everyone to go get it
Um some people and that the hype and the launch window has the most amount of
Players thus you're getting the best
Uh matching towards people of your skill level and it's it's a big old crazy race
Everyone's learning together. It's an exciting time. All of that fun stuff
Keep if you have people excited to jump in during that window and they can
Tell all their friends to go get it then too. It's a huge difference than the oh, yeah
The game is already out and stuff and yeah, you know, but now the free version is here
I guess I'll try I think the the ki model of releasing
essentially
The the full piece and the free
Smaller piece
Like that would have to be day and day
It would have to be and I think and I think the ki model was an interesting test bed considering there's like
No, almost no examples of that beforehand, but I think you can do better now. I really do think you can
if
It's not likely to happen, but if capcom is willing to go that far
Uh, they can create a game that exceeds
What fighting games are like limited to in terms of popularity?
You know, they can break that cap and they can
Appeal to a widespread audience of people that are legitimately like just down to play anything that's free
because with a free to play version of street fighter 6 with with like, uh, uh easy operation controls
Um, you are opening it up to like
Like hundreds of thousands of fucking scrubs that'll flood your fucking ranked
That's good. You want that?
and as much as it's not like
It it shouldn't have as much weight as it does on the argument
But it matters that when you say street fighter is free
That's different from saying that our alive six is free. Yeah, it's still it still has the the cultural cache of the fighting game
It matters. It just it it does matter. Um
Now we talked a lot about why multiverse. This is probably going to be a fucking hit
Based on the fact that it's it's well, it's brand new, but it's got all that like crazy. Recognit brand
Oh, man
recognition and you see fucking nick
They added voice acting and items today
Like jesus christ guys
Yeah, that's way too late
Multiverses is coming for that brawl hall of money. They're coming for that that like casual audience. They're coming for the smash scene
Um, they're coming for young kids that just want to play with their friends and can't really afford anything else
Don't have a credit card. They're coming. It's it's it's it's gonna be a thing. Um
If capcom, you know wanted to to like go down that road they could and they could find themselves like
Enjoying popularity for the from the street fighter for years
And the thing with that is once you have that type of free-to-play audience
You then have street fighter 6 as like a platform, which is kind of what they always want
You know, yeah, which is like a lot of these free-to-play games that get popular
They don't they don't even need the sequel. They can just be a platform
From that point forward, you know
um
It seems immensely unlikely, but god damn it what I love to see it just because it would very positively
Affect the health of the genre more than any other thing could
Make it free you pussies. Yeah
Um, but that's you know, that's that's the bit that's feel I feel like this is the the follow-up where in like three weeks
I get a a message from a little birdie that tells me not only a street fighter 6 not gonna be free
It's gonna cost 200 dollars
Yeah
And in the meantime, that's all we can say for now until like, you know actual game feel is is a thing certainly
um
I hope um
We don't have any major technical hiccups. I hope we don't have you know input lag is now a fucking
perm a thing because of the way
you know
PC and and and well
Yeah, whatever use it to hide latency
Yeah, but uh, all right
Yeah, I don't know. I don't know the re engine will you know, we'll have to say
Hey, I'll tell you what as somebody who has a lot of experience running the resident evil
It's sorry the re reached for the moon engine
Uh engine on pc yo that engine fucking sings man
Has there been it pc to
Optimized has there been pc to console comparisons on on things like lag testing and such for it
I don't know you'd have to I mean I could give you my personal
experience with lag testing
Monster hunter rise on the switch versus the pc
Yeah, that's not really fair because one runs at 29 frames a second and the other runs at whatever you fucking want
It eat like my shit easily crushes 144 on that
Because probably it's in the hundreds unreal has baked in lag that every that we're gonna deal with on any fighting game using unreal
But um, I need to basically someone would need to test a like, you know, like a ps5
re game with a
dmc
Um
Yeah, okay
So like, uh, what's the yeah, I guess it would be like what's the lag right like we'll just
Fucking I'll just ask hitchhiker right now. He would know
We might get an answer before the fucking end of the park
And if and have they optimized it since right?
Because that is a huge problem on
Uh, literally every fighting game right now. Um, everything fucking, uh, strive and and and uh, kof and
You know, all these things are just like well
Uh, the pc version doesn't have input lag, but it does feature more
Weird freezes and hitching because it was not optimized properly and we
Treated the pc as a secondary thought
So what do you want smooth play but input lag or
Um, occasional freezes and no lag, you know
kof
The jump in optimization from monster hunter world to rise on the personal computer is absolutely hilarious
Hmm monster hunter world is one of the shittiest performing pc games. I have ever played
And then you play rise which isn't quite as advanced graphically
And it's one of the best I've ever played in terms of performance
It's it's fucking nuts to the point
Where I would not be surprised if sf6 on
On pc runs the same if
Or better than sf5 on pc interesting
The other thing to compare two is we're gonna have a xbox version to look at as well for this time and
I assume there will be the cross play
Yeah
If they're not stupid there will be
If you want to keep that player base healthy, they had cross play. Why would they not have the cross play?
Well, the moment fighter. Yeah, well, maybe microsoft's coming in but then fucking power rangers can figure it out and you can't
Come on. Yeah. No. Yeah. No, it'll have the cross. They don't come on. It'll have to cross play. That'd be ridiculous. So
Yep, and also cross play with your phone
street six on your phone
I mean when we looked at those simplified controls reggie pulls his phone out and is just like
Are we we doing this or what?
Yeah, yeah
anyways, um
Huh
June 3rd the evo twitter account posts
Evo is grateful to share that we've been working with sony epic games and our developer partners
To reduce input latency for many of your favorite fighting games. Please expect more updates to follow
Oh
Amen, amen
Uh, anyway, anyway, hey, I need a break. I'm gonna piss myself. I'll be right back. Okay
adult Makoto in our hearts we believe
Okay, so
um
Some breaking news looks like keyword studios
has uh unionized with a unanimous vote
Yay, who are they? Congrats to them. Um, so I didn't work there, but keywords is the
Montreal QA studio that acquired the place that I did work at eventually. Oh really? Yeah, so
Um, they kind of came along. They were originally like a localization team
And then they started doing functionality and then eventually they bought out
A babel the old place that I used to be at. So, uh, yeah, they are pretty much like
The major outsourcing beast at this point. I think they just acquired like all the other like there was there used to be like
Vmc there used to be like volt
Uh, the keywords and then there was babel and all these other places and uh, they just kind of came together
and uh, yeah, looks like they're the as the premier outsourcing for um
for uh
Montreal they are now
Unionized congratulations
Hard earned well done
Good shit
Um, looks like it's a yeah, it's it's the reporting on it right now some more details, but uh, it's happening
Things are going down and fucking people are getting it done
I'm I'm
Uh
Kind of amazed that like the traction is sticking
You know this time because usually the busting efforts like work way too well and shut it all down, but uh
Looks like we're getting some some serious progress. That's that's awesome
Um
and uh
Yeah, no and and and you can fucking
Take it from a number of people who are like like reggie was there when it was
Keywords and he can fucking tell you, you know, like they they need it man. So
um
Okay, so that's going down street fighter six
Uh, what else happened launch trailer for final fantasy 16
That is not a launch trailer
That is not I don't know what fucking sit
Excuse me this uh bad text final fantasy 16 launches, uh 2023 summer
Uh trailer introduces new story and gameplay details. Sorry stupid. Um
Yeah, so I guess it was kind of established a little bit beforehand if you were looking
But uh, I didn't really pick up on
the detail that like
Basically, everyone's got their summons as a titan
And it's all about these characters that are essentially just the the titan summons the dominance. Yeah
And the lyrics of the song are singing their voices singing the names out as you're watching them fight
Yeah, and then as the fight is going down you're seeing like two fucking top life bars
Appear like yeah, and I'm like, oh, okay. That's a very fighting game looking life bar system going on there
so
like
Are we just gonna have a like detailed kaiju combat system for controlling big
Probably big summons
Um
What game does gigantic scale fighting really well and feels really good while doing it
Rocket knight adventures for the genesis
Okay, that's a good that's a good pull
um
How many because I feel definitely not many yeah, I feel like
You know either games will bring it in and have it be very limited. You know, it'll be like a qte
type of system
Like going on when you jump in in the in the robot. It's like pretty fucking limited on on what you do there
People in the chat are saying titanfall
so yeah, um
wonderful 101
has
a pretty cool one
um, it essentially just kind of
Zooms out and makes it feel like it you're on foot again
But like it slows it down a little bit
um
bayonetta
It feels less
Full control it feels more like yeah, it just feels like a like a fancy visual to go along with your regular stuff
So i'm not talking about that i'm talking about a game where you're at scale and you
Use the stick to really walk around and do like and you have a lot of full control
Um, yeah, I could I cannot think of much. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm
You for that brief segment where you control rex and mgs4 it feels like you have options
You have like three things you can do besides walking around. So I wouldn't throw that on the list
I don't know. I don't know
hmm
God of war
Naruto Naruto. Yeah, you know what the big forms in Naruto give you really decent control
I have to say
As when I went through the rest of that story and went through the ultimate ninja storms the control of the big beasts
Was like it was all right
Definitely definitely uh more fleshed out than I would have expected for
like
cutscene beasts, you know
um, yeah
Yeah
Well, anyway
Uh, I think um
I think the examples i'm thinking of like when you I see like zone of the enders and like metal wolf chaos
But I'm thinking of games where you are on the ground and then you go into the thing
As opposed to the games where it's like all that, you know, where you're like as opposed to j. Hootie the whole time
For example, you know, it's silly because like it's such a minor part of that trailer
There's two things that leapt out at me one of which is that it's a there's a lot of gameplay in that f of 16 trailer
And if you didn't know that the dmc 5 battle planner is running this don't worry. Here's here's
Here's your character throwing down revolver. Mm-hmm as a fucking move against something
And the other thing that I thought was a cute little detail and I was sure that everyone had seen it before me
But you see all these shots of ifrit going nuts and being a problem with the moon behind him
Mm-hmm, and then you see cutscenes which are assuredly from the beginning of the game with a big old shot of the moon
But there's instead of nothing. There is a tiny little smaller red moon next to it
Mm-hmm, and I'm like, oh, that's a cute little
That's a cute little thing they're gonna do they're gonna have the red moon crash into the setting again
And it's gonna be ifrit this time
Oh, okay. I didn't pick up on on that
um
Because it's the final fantasy 14 idiots. I see it sex
protagonist fucks
confirmed
That's right
Setting off a chain reaction of people talking about various protagonists of each ff game and whether or not they fuck
There's only three squaring x characters that I can think of that have canonically fucked
cloud and tifa
Faye and ellie and now these two
Okay, but like people are asking about it. Not in a literal in plot fuck, but like
Do they have the energy of a person who knows what sex is?
you know
I think that's that's that's the uh
Okay clown the clown clown
clown does it
Ah
Oh fucking god damn it. Yeah
so
Cloud sacks doing it for you
No, it's just like that's that's a Freudian slip of like that's what I look that's what I see when I look at cloud
clown
Cloud is a clown. Yeah, he's a fucking dumbass
I
Mean I'll tell you one thing
Kefka absolutely positively fucks
Yeah, but the question is whether or not it's like a mailbox or a hole in the ground. Yeah
Or himself for that matter. Yeah
me
Oh, yes, Kefka's the kind of guy to just rut on top of a mirror
Ha ha ha ha
God Emperor clown absolutely fuck
Uh, yeah, no, just just kind of hole in it and just go all in on the mirror. Absolutely. Um
Forced the guards and cultists to watch
I um
Yeah, no protagonists getting up and actually having having one of them scenes. Hey, hold on a minute
Does anywhere in the yakuza series is there a scene like that?
Is there a is there a
Protagonist getting out of bed moment
Ever protagonist no
Because I'm like some expanding beyond curio
It's implied
that in yakuza 2
Like they make maybe make out or she spends the night, but they definitely don't have sex
um and in five it it hits the absolute absurdity
Of curio has a woman a little younger than him who lives with him
Who they are not romantically involved even though she's like pretending to be his wife. It's very weird
It's um, okay
though yagami
mentions that like
One of the characters is like his ex-girlfriend. Okay, they used to go out
Because some games settings like
You just get used to them functioning without sex being a thing in that world
Um yakuza is fucking bonkers insane bizarre if that's a setting without sex in it
Because it's like from in because there's two yakuza's right
There's the there's the fucking cut scene with the budget and then there's everything else and and in
Uh
In the cut scene
Shit, there's only one character that is even protagonist adjacent
That has ever even known what sex is at all. Okay, and it's haruka because she has a baby. Okay
Right. She has a boyfriend
And they they have an ill they have a kid, right? However
On the other side of things
You're in a public park
Teaching a dominatrix how to fucking neg people while a bunch of school children go
Exactly, but none of those characters the teacher you the the the dom teacher lady all of them
None of them have had sex
You know in in in minigame world. Yeah
Uh, anyway
Majima was married
Um
And he was married to a pretty lady. So I'm gonna assume they had sex
So in 16 here now, um, we've got we've got sex confirmed
and and and
That's exciting
Yeah, I I it's it's
Weird to say but it's like
I'm
Most excited about what combat is gonna look like
Yeah, you know for this personally, I think for the story's tone
I think having some dickhead old man going we could just breed new citizens and rebuild their houses
Is about as perfectly on point as you can get
Of like so what you just build a new one. They're just peasants. It's great
great
um
And yeah, everything is pretty and and fancy and and
very very ff
um
What uh
Kind of a dream team on it. They finally came out and was like
Here's everybody that's working on it. You may recognize some of these names as people who've worked on
Fauna fancy tactics fauna fancy 12 fauna fancy 14
Fagrin story
I hope that they kind of it's not they're probably not tactics ogre
The tactics ogre guy designs the character like it's it's the fucking it's the gang
It would be nice if they kind of just put out the game and let it be like a really good game
And and it was not like part of a massive
Like the ff6 universe with its side animes and you know, no
No, what really know what you're whole thing
I'm telling you what you're gonna see right now is um
You're gonna see a situation
There's a stupid little meme going around
Which is the the shitty photoshop of
Yoshi p walking up to an empty desk and like begging for an ff14 collaboration
And then putting the paper down and then walking to the other side of the desk
And going yeah, okay
Yeah, okay. Yeah, all right. Yeah. Yeah, sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. So that's gonna happen for sure
But the you know the massive
multimedia project the universe for you know
any of these things that you announced before the game is actually out is like
I think just get a good one on the board that everyone fucking loves and
Once it's a once it's a hit
Start looking at how to expand if you want to but there's only one part of this that I'm like, oh, no
Which I saw this and it's like it'll be releasing in summer of next year
And I'm like, oh cool patch 6.3 or 6.4 is gonna fucking suck ass
Because they're all gonna be tired
Oh, no
I hope point two and point three are really good
Um
Yeah, so
That's about it. Not much else there, you know
Cass looks pretty interesting
Big angry man
Seems cool that big angry man is gonna be titan because he looks like titan. He looks like titan
The lady that looked like an elf will probably be the shiva because she looked like an elf
That being said it there's one little moment and that which to me
Summs up that they're putting they're bringing in that devil may cry energy
To follow fantasy in the in the stupid way that I really appreciate
um, which is
uh, fucking odin zen tetsuking a
Bahamut mega flare in half to ride through it. That's that's hype
Which is like, oh, okay. You're gonna see the summons doing all their stupid summons shit and combining it
Yeah, always always the makes you know that that makes perfect sense that odin the
Norse god of thunder does a zen tetsuken
Uh, yeah
100% yeah
Oh removes right there were ramas right there. Not right in
My jews. Oh, japanese god of thunder, but odin specific. Yeah, don't worry. No, okay. Well
Um, and then uh, they revealed re4
Again, yeah
With I remember when they revealed that shit like 25 years ago, but I don't think that's what you're talking about
But then they did it with the fucking they had the little, um
troubadour like
Yeah, so spanish guitar is an obvious
Uh, uh
Place to go with a game that takes place in europe
In europe
Yeah, but you know
You know
So, uh, there's a lot there's a lot in the uh,
Resident evil 4 remake trailer which by the way, they're just calling resident evil 4
Which is gonna get super fun in a little bit. He's got a new face
I'm going to uh be referencing
Susie the severe hunters video on a lot of it because you did a really great deep dive on a lot of the details
Um, there's a lot in the basic gist of it
There's a lot in this trailer that shows off that they are going back and using older stuff
From versions of re4 that never came out
So like the way leon's jacket is actually really big and bulky
And the look of ashley's new design in general are like from the hook man stuff
The game's color palette has expanded
Because re4 is great at a lot of things
But what it's not great at is having more than a single color in any particular zone
In which it's it's kind of brown and then it's kind of brown on rocks and then it's gray
If the game has
The exact map of re4 and the same enemies in the same places
And now they look better
And oh, that's that's not gonna be what it what it is at all
Like would that be considered a success?
No, absolutely not okay not after resident evil 2 because resident evil 2 was this is
This is very obviously based off of that old layout and all these old tricks
But it remixed them in a bunch of fantastic ways and made a bunch of cool new shit
Uh in the stuff they put out though
The re4 thing it it took painstaking detail in those
Eclipse that hey, do you remember this building?
That entire like that indeed that you can see a shot of the the starting village area where everybody attacks you
And the layout is one-to-one
Which is why I asked that because i'm looking at it and I recognized that village and i'm like
Oh, yeah, then you go up into the top and then the ladder gets placed up and you fight on the second floor up there
I remember that but
You look at the house that he walks up to which is the first house and that layout is not one-to-one
The house is too large and the window is on the wrong side of the house
Ah
And then you look at something like you look at mendez who was the big cheese
Who uh in the original he was wearing a big green trench coat
He was a bald guy because he was supposed to evoke like mr. X
And now in the trailer you can see that he is in fact still a
Wearing a green trench coat and he's a big bald guy
But now much like mr. X in two he is wearing a hat
Because he is he is a he is
An evolution not of original mr. X, but of resident evil twos mr. X
Okay, so some more deliberate connections are going to be made
Yeah, to the new ones. Okay
So I I fully believe that equals power
Kind of I fully believe that what you're going to see is a version of the game that it
Because the re3 guys are supposed to make this and then they got pulled off of it for the re2 guys to do it
And to me that says that the game will not cut anything and will in fact probably expand
On things
Okay, like resident evil twos remake it did cut a couple things, but it also massively expanded say the sewer area
Uh, will you beat re2 as leon the sewer area in resident evil two originally is literally five rooms
okay
In re2 remake it's like a third of the game
Yeah, fucking up three is way
Less bad than fucking up four. Um, yeah in terms of impact. So
I would love to see and I know this is probably going to be the last thing on their minds in promotional material
But show me what happens when you press start
Show me an attache case. Show me what that looks like. Oh that would come on that'll assuredly be there
And I also would like to see
um, not just
All the expected amazing reloads, but let's get some variants in there
Let's get like two or three fucking sick reload animations
I would not I would not be surprised right the the trailer was very carefully put together
Of things that people would want to see there's a there's a shot specifically
Where lewis is holding the red nine and like the whole screen is just focused on the red nine
God, yeah
And it's like yeah, okay
There's a shot of leon lying in that little boat over the delago
The only thing the only thing tighter than a fucking
You know the the the original reloads being in and being good is just a couple of
Extra tight reloads for multiple go for the same gun
You know just just the art of reloading
redefine it
I think it's going to be more serious
but
I can't I don't think they can possibly
get rid of
The camp
I think I think the stuff that happens in reasonable four is so absurd
That if they play if they try and play some of that shit straight, it's actually going to come off as being more camp
Ashley as a whole is like that's the big question. It's just like how's she gonna act
You know, she has more gameplay
Uh than she used to the in the beginning of the trailer
You can see that she'll be playable and it looks like that'll actually be pre leon expanding her segments out a bit. Okay. Yeah, okay
But it's not like uh, it's
Well, anyway, it's not it's not the same as like a side a side b bit with you know
The original with two and no, it's it's the same way a lot of the earlier games did where it's like
Here's a little side story is the character in the middle and re4 had that anyway
Uh, yeah
Well, vertigo is gonna be great
Oh, the voice acting is all gonna be fucking. Yeah, like new and also. Yeah, the voice acting is all now done by the the motion actors
Right, so it's the same guy as leon for example as from re2
Expanded salvador sequences
There's already a ton of them in the original game
Well, there's like four of those sequences
Yeah, so, um
And and I remember to weren't we talking so I didn't play village right but like we're I remember when village was released
We're talking about like
Um, it's good that way that being set up like our village being like
Like training wheels for redoing for
You know
It feel village very much feels like the re4 we never got
I I've I've sneaking suspicions that it's literally the re4 we never got
um, but
Yeah, really the more the thing but res evil 2 remake is the training for the re4 remake
Making yeah, I guess like
how to do
How to do new things and not fucking ruin it essentially like like the the most important thing for me to see right now
Is I want to see uh 90 seconds of gameplay
I need you to show me shooting a ganado in the face
And then walking up to them and hitting the a button
Like I need I that that like
Vital and also I need to see how the character moves
Right, of course, they're going to move like a regular ass modern video game
But I still need to see like how they actually move
I mean like are we going to see a melee button?
But like would they
Would it be I guess because it's like within with the way it feels to play two and three
Would it be more about sticking to that or would it be more about
Taking that and making it no no you get you get your laser dot and you're an action man in re4. Okay
So
They're like I've played enough re4 to let me tell you if you fucking stand there and try and like let the fucking
Credical close in for good shots. You're gonna die in like two seconds. It's way too aggressive
Which again unless they unless sequences are remixed for that type of play, but you know
No way that that would be that's not a nostalgia
Change
Um like I think it is much more likely that there's a kick button on the control scheme like that mercenary shit
Yeah, yeah
Um, and then they showed off a couple other things as well. So in the same vein
We got a gameplay reveal for calisto protocol because up until that point it was just the the cutscene
And so first of all not in the pubg universe any longer. No, it is now its own thing completely separate and
um
I mean I still have yet to play dead space, but
That looks it's that that seems to be when I was uh when I was watching it
I was like this might be the strongest version of we don't have the license
But we're just gonna make the game anyway. I've ever seen in my life
Compared to evil within
Yeah, way more like it is it is just dead space for
Okay, just
Very very bluntly
Like the way it moves the way the guy's fucking
Uh the way the guy's uh health is on a icon on his back
The way enemies animate
Like it's it's it's just dead space. Yeah. Yeah guys. I'm I'm I'm gonna I said it
I'm gonna play it. I'm kind of in the middle of elder ring and mass effect. I can stop if you'd like
Those first two games are really good. I'm gonna stop. We can we can we can stop with the third one
And switch right over to that space if you if you want to do that. No problem. Just let me know
Uh anyway
So, yeah, um seems uh, you know what probably better to not be tethered to the pub g universe
probably better to be able to just
Uh create their own thing, huh?
Yeah, to not to not have to be like
To not have an item where you found the secret legendary tie
of player unknown
frying pan man and the secret legendary helmet
The frying pan is that it
Yeah, remember they tried to sue people for including frying pans in their games
And the judge was like it's a fucking frying pan
Um
In the meantime, I mean because that that would also put them in the same universe as among us and uh avana, so
You know it would
Uh, they're porting spider-man to pc
That's surprising
Without there being another one around the corner to push on playstation
That is surprising. That's how they're doing it
They do a year where they're like look the old games coming to the pc and then two years later
They're like look the new game is coming to the playstation and then two years later
They go look the newer game is coming to the pc
They're all they're all staggered
And just like that, um
Every single costume that's ever been made has now
Been announced for spider-man pc as well as probably venom and carnage
probably
Everything you could ever want out of spider-man
universe
Yep, go ahead
confirmed
Right life bam. Yeah
Then there was a trailer for a roller drone, which looks fucking sick
um
Olly olly
doing um
Essentially you skate up the ramp and you do the tony hawk like vert
And then you aim and shoot and kill everything
In midair and then land and keep skating
Just like good old roller derby no changes
Love it
Uh art style is cool
Roller drone is a name that evokes all the things you want, you know with uh, if I can
um
Thunderdome and and and uh
What the fuck was it called um
Running man style
Uh
Battle sport death sport setting
You know and and as our local uh death sport enthusiast, I feel like uh, this this would be right up your alley
You know, it's weird. I would also think that but
For whatever reason it just didn't do it for me
Hmm
And as we all know I I I do love death sport
but
Is it because it was designed to be death sport as opposed to
Death was introduced to the sport that was an originally a safe sport. Is that what it is?
No, it's because I look at it and I'm like this just looks like a worse version of I shit you not the club
Okay
A game that apparently I am the only person who know of its existence
No, I'm sure you do as well. Oh, yeah, we talked that back in the day. We'd always fucking
That was that was a james small classic
Talking about the club
um
They showed off
What else there was a season letter to the future which looks pretty can't tell what yeah looks interesting
Wait to see what the narrative is on that seems to be a
Walk take pictures and do things might be cool
um, and then it turnites
which was
Fancy looking
Anime game with schmoovement and people are like, yeah, it looks it looks really good
And and folks are like this seems
Huh
I'm getting vibes over here and then the creator puts a tweet out and it's like, hey, yeah
I played persona 5 and I really loved it and then I made this game. That's okay because that's like
It's yeah
No, like they straight up the creator was like I played p5 for the first time and I could I I fucking loved it
And now I'm making a game
100 inspired by like not they're not they're not pretending. It's not that game has a button to hold hands
Mm-hmm
Man, I think that game looks like trash
Let's uh, let's see what maybe I'm crazy
But I I want to see what what the combat looks like uh in application over a stage
But the highlights of it looks stylish at points
Um, I'm I'm I'm looking I want to see could be could be interesting. There's some motorcycle play
and uh
you know some some
High octane-y things, but uh, yeah, I think it looks all right
Also, yeah coming out and basically just being like yep, I love me some p5. It is what it is. That's the right way to do it
It invented jazz, you know
Uh
Yeah
It's true black people didn't and by that I mean not Africans
It's true
Um
So one other thing that happened and I hope this is not
A non-story because it seems like it's it is but
in the past
I've I've read things like this and then it's turned out to be some bullshit
but
The the the story here is Japan sets a new record brings world closer to internet 100,000 times faster than current speeds
Because they were able to successfully
Um use a
uh petabit
Data transfer
at
Yeah, they were able to transfer data at one petabit using
existing pipelines and using existing
Uh fiber optics in japan
um
Well sucks for a rollback
Yeah, it makes it even better over there
Which means we have even leslie's reasons to care for sure is the thought but um, no
What they're basically describing is that like, uh
You could in theory. Yeah, like what does that convert to a one petabit per second?
Uh means um 10 million channels of 8k broadcasting per second
um
No laps whatsoever that means
uh
You could at trial what 1.02 petabits traveling 32 miles per second you could send 127
1,500, uh
Uh, I mean yada yada it's fast internet and you don't need to hook up a baby into the chiral network
And they say that you could put it on existing systems, but don't worry. We'll never see it because fuck
I mean at that point
I think it's you can just go burn down bell and videotron when the world is moving 100,000 times faster
With their better internet and we're stuck on bell and videotron. It's time to just burn them down
Don't forget shawn. Tell us motherfucker
I mean for america you got your comcast, right? That's your
That's your your equivalent or whatever. Um
Japan's actually potentially gonna get even better with their internet and and it's it's it's crazy. Um
That sounds like the hypothetical
um
Like internet of no
No loading, you know in theory. I I would like to say I I read and reread this and I may be mistaken
Okay, but the article may have made a slight
The wording error because they describe it as faster
But it actually seems like what they're describing is wider
Because they're saying oh you can send this much more data
At the same like at the same at this at x speed, but they actually don't list the speed getting faster
Because light is how fast shit goes on fiber optics
Um
one petabit per second
is a
Is a higher
Transfer rate. Yeah, but you're sending more, right? Yes. Like I'm sending like a car instead of just a tire
But fatter pipe. I think that I think the speed at which it gets there
Might actually be very similar because there's only
So fast light can go
I suppose but as an idiot trying to figure this out, I would assume that the end result means
um, even though it's it's
Just increasing the size of the transfer
You're gonna get more of that data faster, which means less
Yeah, but I'm specifically you're getting more packets on your end
in terms of in terms of
In terms of like, uh, fucking movies and games and downloads. Yeah
But and uploads but in terms of like peer to peer back and forth. I bet this would actually not
Make that big of a difference
But I could be mistaken
Hmm bad with versus latency
Uh
Yeah, I I again I'm an idiot and I don't know but
If things can get better
And they do everywhere but not here
um
I'm gonna be very upset
We're not gonna get it. Don't worry about it
Just don't worry about it
See you're worrying about it. I can see you're worrying. I'm I'm yeah. No, see that's not that's your mistake. Just just give up
I'm I'm thinking about that hypothetical again that end state where
like the
Where everything is like a tv channel essentially where the process of
Doing things just things just happen instantly, you know, that's definitely like
A possibility within our lifetimes. I think we I think as long if you're working with existing
Structures, it might be fucking sick to have a world where nothing loads. Everything just kind of happens
That'd be cool
That's nice
It's nice it's nice to want it's nice to want things
Videotron must burn
And you know what here's the hope though. You really if you really want to know what's what the hope is that
uh
The fucking isps in canada will join you in burning them down because they want their own shit as well
The fact that canadian isps have to piggyback on these existing frameworks. Oh, it's a whole fucking thing
They couldn't it's a whole thing. They will light the fucking gasoline
You know spires themselves, man, they'll lead the charge
really
Uh, anyway, let's take some letters
Hey, uh, I'll be right back that dog needs to go outside
So that'll give you plenty of time to load up some good letters. All right, if there are any good letters to have sure
Hey, um
So, yeah, uh, it didn't I didn't like
Said throw sonic on there because like I don't have much to say
I mean sonic sonic sonic showed off the combat in sonic frontiers and oh cool
He like it shows some fighting with like some like enemies that also look kind of sterile-ish and
Someone had a comment on it that was basically like hey, there's probably a bad idea to show off the
Game's elements separate from each other and then you have to imagine how the whole soup comes together as opposed to
Showing us what the full thing looks like, you know, but that I'm like, eh not much to say about that really like
So whatever, um
That's that's that's about that with sonic. Let's take a look at
um
Some letters if you've got one
Did you see the new street fighter six feature?
As we're talking live something got announced literally just now
I sent you it on the thing
You can now in the versus screen you can make a fucking face at your opponent like you shit your pants
Show your attitude with the game face feature in street fighter six by pressing the directional buttons at the versus screen
Scowls act smug or confuse them with a mixture of rapid emotions
Uh, yeah, it's called soul caliber two
I've got you
Squirm scatter
This is right. I know just kidding
Oh, just kidding is the worst. Oh, yeah
It's literally just soul caliber two not yet
So
The damage done to my soul by fucking juan was fucking no escape terrible win clothes
Does no one remember it's just this feature is soul caliber twos like that's it. That's all we're doing guys
All right, well sure
Wind
Yeah, that's true
Yeah, all right, uh anyways if you got a letter you can send it
To uh castle super beast mail at gmail.com
What do we got? All right, here we go
um
Got one coming in from jay
Who says internet of things cross retail hell
Hello funny dreads guy and funny bald guy that lives in my phone
um
It's me jay
I've got a funny anecdote about the what happens when the internet of things meets fucking retail work
I had a novel experience at my department store job
um
I compile people's mobile orders and get them ready for the card side staff to carry it out
To the center scan them with a handheld weird machine and it runs on like android 1.0. It's weird and shitty
um, but it's not really
A bad job. It's weird and shitty sometimes, but it's not really a bad job
But last week the wi-fi at our store had a big dead spot right by the mobile order grocery fridge area
This led to me standing there with a carton of eggs in my literal hands helpless because the device would not tell the store
Where I put the eggs
And it was bricked without steady wi-fi connections
Eventually my boss hit me up on the walkie-talkie asking what was taking so long
Which forced me to actually have to utter the phrase. Yeah, I can't put the eggs away
The store iphone thing won't let me
So imagine if you will my frustration when I was a broke-ass teen walking around my apartment complex with my phone
Looking for wi-fi strong enough to download ROMs
Or some shit, uh combined with the pressure of family frozen retreated groceries are still there slowly thawing out
And all I can do is shuffle around the store to a place with good wi-fi to finish putting in the orders of fucking frozen waffles
Pat the red bar warriors are in your groceries
You know, it's funny because I did the internet order a couple times
and um
The the rule that came down on that was the the nightmare for internet order for me
Wasn't anything to do with the wi-fi was always substitutions. It's always like they want they want these eggs
We don't have these eggs
and um
I asked my boss, uh
Or not my boss my co-worker who usually did it
And I asked her. Hey, what do you what do you do when this thing? Uh, do you call them?
And they she's like, no, you don't have fucking time. I just put fucking whatever in there
It's eggs
Who gives a shit?
And then you'd fucking send it off
And they would call to complain
And you'd put them on hold and just leave them there
God damn dude
Well, you don't have time yes to take that call
Great system perfect
I mean, I've done more than a couple times what I've done
Fuckin internet orders and the replacement system is like
It you you select from the items list and do it yourself
It doesn't have to go through explaining what you want or whatever
But occasionally you do it'll be like, hey, there's nothing similar just type in what you want
And there'd be a thing where like I'd order brussel sprouts, but for some reason the dumb like app would have
Uh thing where it's like order a brussel sprout and then when you it gets to the door
It is a single brussel sprout in a bag. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, could you like
And I said, can you tell me to can you do it by the kilogram or what and like a lot of and sometimes, you know
They'll be like, oh like what do you want like and it'll be like, oh, yeah
Give me a bag of like two kilograms or something or whatever
But by default when you select when you say like give me brussel sprouts
The only thing to do is manually put the exact number you want
So it's like, okay. I guess I want 50 brussel sprouts then
You know, please stand
50 of them
I feel a lot of sympathy for this gentleman
Uh or lady, I guess it didn't specify but, um
Having parts of that be automated
Means that like your leeway
On just getting it done has evaporated
Right, um
There was only one thing at the store
That was like that, but it drove every cashier fucking crazy
And it was really simple. Okay
Well, you ever have minute made juice that you know, the frozen ones. Yep. Come in that can thing. Okay guy walks up
They're on sale. You bought 40, you know, you put them in a freezer last weeks, right?
They're all the same price, but he grabbed them from all different flavors
What do you do? You
Scan the first one and type the number in
Type in times 40
Whatever, right? No, no, no, no, no. Don't do that
We need to know
Which ones sold so we can restock so you're gonna need to scan each of them in manually
Yeah, dude, it's it's load like when that rule came down
Like I swear to you know, everyone complains like oh the fucking cash is so slow
It was like they removed someone from the store. Jesus
It was like four caches became three
Just from this one thing and everyone fucking hated it the customer hated it
Like why do I need to pull it off? I'm just gonna take the car the car tap the fucking cashier hated it
I fucking hated it because I would have to fucking pick the stupid shit up half the time for these
Yeah, there's a couple things like that where if you get the group of items, but different flavors on each one. It's a different
I'm thinking of like the tuna cans when they'd have like different flavored tunas and it's like
You could fucking go to there with like 20 different things and they're all the same price, but
Yeah, well, okay
You know, I just had I just had a flash
from this moment
that
is
Yeah, well, will you ever work retail or service or have you always been stuck in that office shithole? Never did retail
Because there are people out here that will empathize with this
But I just it's a story I just feel like I need to tell
Because it's so common and it's the angriest I ever got at work
Yeah, well the thing that that you have that is well
I mean the thing that it takes to be
Like in those mode where the customer is always right no matter what's happening and you have to just swallow it
I don't have that. I don't have that thing where I can just
Eat shit. So I could I can't tell you
So that this is a perfect version of the story because most people don't have that
Right because most people are human and the it's fucking bullshit. So
You get a situation where you're working at a retail or service job
in which uh, you're fucking maybe your tips are accounted for or
Uh, you're fucking watched to make sure you don't accidentally
Take a juice box to the back before paying
Before paying for it and then just pay for it afterwards because you might steal some, you know
Just complete fucking asshole anal retentive shit
And you get the customer that comes in and says I want this cheese for this price, you know, well, it's not
And they go well
The sign said it was and I go no it doesn't and they all show you and you walk over
And sure enough they're like look 299. I'm like sir, that's for corn
It's just it happens to be next to the item
And they're like no, it's not I want it
And just back and forth and until I want to see your manager
All right, okay fine
You get the manager and she walks out
And and they explain it and they turn to you and they say just fucking give it to them for a price. I don't give a shit
And they just completely fucking throw you under the bus and now you're
Yeah
Shit oh and it's like like
I should just and you do that a couple times and then you're like, you know what fuck it
Just steal right in front of me like I give a shit
Yeah, why bother? Mm-hmm
Mmm
Oh, excuse me. I gotta let the wife in
Uh
Yeah, man all these every path is every path has got his fucking brutality
But I feel as if like I kind of knew about myself early on that like I just
I would not be
um
I would not be polite in bad circumstances
So I did whatever I could even at starting basic like even like when I did my basic first jobs like like
The closest thing I guess I was doing like literally like door-to-door fucking sales at one point even
but
It wasn't a a like people walk in and then bring whatever with them from their day up to you type of attitude, you know, so
um
I dodged that as much as I could man
I'm just thinking of like some fucking guy running out of the store with like bullshit that he's stealing
My boss yells at me like stop him and I just turn and like shrugging up like no
I'm getting paid like 750 an hour like I'm gonna stop some guys steal like
I give a shit
There's bigger people who are paid to to go do that also
Well, you see we didn't want to pay for security
Because it's too expensive to staff a security guard all day
So just yell at you to stop him
Yeah, no all my shit was um
Like
There's one asshole and that's usually your boss and you're gonna have to eat shit from them for as long as possible
As opposed to variety variety assholes coming in off the street and it's like, you know what?
It's I'll take that one because I can figure out how that asshole works
And and not have to make a hard read on everybody walking in
You know
You know, there's a guy who worked at at uh at my place
He was the head of the butcher's department. He's a good guy named frank. He's a really good guy
And when nobody was around that was above him. He was the guy running things
And he was my favorite person in the world because when I get in a situation like that
He was like six eight and he had a cauliflower ear
Mm-hmm
And they start getting up into his shit and he would just like get get the fuck out. I don't care leave
Fucking leave
Uh
It's great and you go. Oh, thank goodness frank is here
Yeah, no
Oh, I can't fucking imagine what it would feel like to be like well the fucking machine doesn't work
Guess i'm gonna just be super late on every order
I guess that's tomorrow's problem
I mean like you like that's like there's a step along the way where it's like does your manager
Uh see that and understand how stupid it all is and go yeah fair enough and then
You know, they explain that going upwards or do they go
Find a way to make it work or do they go like you should care enough about this despite the fact that you're not cared
You're not paid enough to do security to suddenly switch to doing security if you want to be a team player
You know, you have to exceed expectations, right?
Depends where you are
So I got in a situation so much so they would tell me to do something that was impossible to finish by my shift
Like they'll be like, hey, can you go downstairs and sort the recycling bottles and I go there are like a hundred thousand bottles down there
Like it's going to take like five days to do that. Are you sure like you need to give me another guy?
They're like, no, just do it and I would I would
Go to I would be leaving and they were like, did you finish it? I'm like, no
They're like, well, you need to get back down there and I went no, I don't and I would punch out and then as soon as the fucking
Machine would click
The union rules would kick into place, which means they get to they get to fuck off
And it becomes tomorrow's problem. However, if you're working somewhere that doesn't have a union. Yep. Fuck. Yep
That's where again the the slow walk over to the whiteboard
uh, take your names tag off of it
And very very very slowly drop it in the bucket of names that are not getting called for the next day
You know, yeah, so
anyway, um
That's some shit
All right, uh
let's see
Here we go. We got one coming in here from pepper says dear beef men
Spouse and I have had our five-year anniversary this weekend. We got congratulations. Congratulations
We got to the chef tasting at Morimoto's got to try the wagyu beef. How do I eat mortal food again?
How do I shut the fuck up about it? I don't know if I can anymore pray for me
Yep
That's the wagyu
That's the I don't know
That's the maybe
Maybe I'm a trashy bitch
Okay, because I've gone to big big fancy restaurants
I've gone to japan and eaten fucking high-end sushi and all that shit, but when we're driving around
You know what i'm looking at on my fucking map. I'm like, man. I hope there's a fucking wendy's two towns over
Dude, there's a fucking there's a butchery that's uh around that that they've got uh, you know
Some fun cuts of different kinds and they've got their their
They've got their wagyu and when i'm feeling I when i'm feeling like a fancy bitch
I go get a couple cuts of that
And
Yeah, it really like I know exactly what pepper is talking about. It's a it's a ruiner. It's a game changer
It's like you can't
You really do kind of instantly you chew it and then you become that person that's like, oh fuck
I'm never gonna shut up about this. Yeah, but how long ago have you gone to wendy's?
God
Yeah
Perhaps yeah, hey
Jesus
like
On the one hand fucking perfect marbled wagyu beef on the other hand wendy's though. All right. Well
Jesus you think you think i'm joking you think that yeah
I mean look man. It's it is that shit is it ain't fucking cheap, you know, but
It is really really noticeably like unbelievably good beef and it's it's i'd said i'm ranking it second after yakiniku black hole really
Um, so i'm right there with you and the answer is you you you're you're fucked pepper. Sorry
um
Let's go to wendy's bro. Let's go to yeah. Yeah
Uh, all right
We got one here
Coming in
uh
From
Uh why it says what is the worst documentary you've ever seen?
Hey, will you and pat uh recently
I watched a documentary called when we were bullies
And it's the story of a documentary filmmaker named jay that randomly ran into someone that they went to elementary school with
While catching up they both remembered that almost their entire class would bully a single kid named richard
Jay then decided to connect all the former students together and interview them
About what they did to richard to compile into the documentary
The bullying ranged from name calling to poking him with sewing needles to even beating him up as a group
Some even laughed when telling the stories during the documentary jay also tries to contact richard
But richard told him that he wasn't going to talk to him and that he didn't want the documentary to be made
The documentary ends with jay trying to justify why he was a bully by saying that his parents were getting a divorce and he didn't know
Better so it wasn't his fault
There's also a brief section where he addresses richard directly explaining why he's still making the film
Even after being asked not to and says verbatim if you ever watch this, I hope you understand that it's not your story
It's our story
The overall message of the documentary seems to be jay says
Saying that he accepts his own apology
Even though richard does not
It was the worst documentary I've ever seen and it left me infuriated
The only positive aspect is that jay's behavior proves that most bullies don't actually grow out of it
And instead are just forced by society to stop being bullies. What's the worst you've ever watched? That's a
Fuck it. I I don't have anything that's going to top that that is
insanity
holy
Unsurprisingly people who are complete fucking pieces of shit as young people
um with no external cause
Turn into complete piece of fucking shit adults
like
Let's take for example
if this particular person said that his bullying was them lashing out due to a
Uh undiagnosed mental health issue because they were suffering from abuse at home, right?
You can connect the dots there
Right?
That's an external cause that is going to come out in a way and it can be understood
But people's parents get divorced all the time
People go through rough spots in their school year or what have you
um
The decision to soothe yourself with cruelty
Is an informed one
I would even say that like if you take this entire setup and
put in
Like what you were just talking about let's say some form of legitimate
traumatic reason why that kid
Didn't understand why he was wrong for bullying the other kid and was literally like
Just in a situation where he was something was up and he was incapable of understanding it, right?
Whatever that excuse would have been
There's still a second point where after
Coming to realization of what that was and why that happened and whatever it is
When you go to the person who's the subject of the story and they say don't do this and then you go fuck you
I'm doing it anyway. Well that just like that's the that's the moment where you have a chance to back up and go
Oh, fuck. Okay. I thought this might be a chance to do something and then you could step back
That
Does it to begin with is what's in play when it comes to deciding to stop it
Because it the same triggers have never been fixed and they're all in place
So the the person who doesn't give a fuck back then doesn't give a fuck about what you have to say about the matter now
And then you can just backwards justify whatever you need to to make yourself feel better
Yeah, no, you you you attributed a dramatically higher amount of self-reflection
Then is possible
One of the one of the personality traits of people who act like this is a total lack of self-reflection a world of me
Outward-facing only
Um
That's an insane ass a fucking uh, uh
Summary
When we were bullies is what it's called. And yeah, I don't think I've ever seen anything that can really top what you just described
Yeah, like I'm sure you heard at some point in your life woolly. Ah, it's just kids kids are cruel
It's like no cruel kids
are cruel
Bad kids are are are are specifically cruelty
I think um
I I can I can think of
Story like documentaries where like there's been times where I've sat down with punch mom to watch something
And then like a couple minutes in would be like what the fuck is this and then just be like eh tapping out, you know
um
The in in terms of what I've sat through to its entirety though like there's one that I can think of I don't remember enough details
Unfortunately to be able to put together a sensible
Thing here, but I kind of remember watching
Um this one on netflix called uh sea spiracy
And it kind of just seemed it seemed a little bit odd in that like it had a lot of really
good uh points and things that it was trying to expose about um
the like basically like the uh
unsustainability of like the fishing industry like nets leaving lots of pollution um some of the horrible stuff that was said
Stuff that was happening in japan with the dolphin culling
um, you know the the the the stickers that go on the cans saying that it's it's
You know certified when it's not and there's all sorts of stuff like that. Um
And I remember that all being like uh, you know pretty sound and like
Like important things to expose and then it also showed like how certain countries
I think had like people that were like
Employee like basically indentured servants working on ships doing fishing things and it was it was really horrible
Stuff that was being exposed. Um
and then it kind of like
um
it goes towards like
uh trying to
Then sort of like explain what?
The solution to some of this is and then it like it looks into like like farming and at one point they go out and they follow
Well like a hunting boat and stuff
um, but I just remember the kind of
There's some specific things it was doing that I was like something's
A bit odd about how this is going. I don't know really know what I'm not sure
um, and I just remember that like at the end it kind of
I remember sitting there with punch mom and we were kind of just like
This the in the end their solution was basically they're just like so this is why everyone on the planet needs to stop eating fish
Permanently and that's the only way to solve the like what we're talking about here
And I was like is it really just that?
I don't
Like I don't think that's a viable goal and the and the yeah
They kind of just go into this thing where they're just like yeah, no, that's the only thing and it's like no that's a huge
I understand what you're saying about the problems here
but then that's another thing entirely and um
In some cases it's like
There if you're particularly the type of person that's like I'm going to go fish and eat what I hunt because that's what
Consuming and that's the most normal way to consume this type of thing
it was kind of there's kind of a vibe of like
Yeah, but no even that's not okay, and that's like
It's me. It's it's kind of a mean thing to do
I I don't I don't remember the specific points, but
It just kind of it it struck me is really odd like you ever you ever talk to somebody who's like upset about
About politics the thing you ever talk to somebody who's upset about something that's going on in politics
You're like, I don't know man. What are you going to do and they're like we got a
revolution
and you're and you're like
How
Yeah, we just all got to get up to
Revolution and you're like I don't think that's going to happen like I had it much
I don't think that's a goal that's like achievable
I had the specific things in my head more right after I watched it and it's been a while now
But like it just was definitely something where I was like, okay
There's a lot of good points about some shit that's that's bad and that needs to stop and it's like with farms
It's like you can you can have a fish farm and stuff
But like some of them come out diseased and lice and that's bad and like you know everything has these like violent criticisms and stuff
but
Yeah, it just it then kind of was like, okay
But the the person who's directing this their lifestyle is that they've chosen to go vegan and essentially
This is all supposed to be a slam dunk as to why the result is for you to do the same and it's like that's
Not you didn't lay out that pathway
You know and and you're not having that full conversation. It feels like so
Anyway, that's the closest thing I can think of which was just like
You gotta stop testing on animals. Don't you use diabetes medication derived from testing on animals? That's different
It's different because I'm helping them so I need it
Yeah
That former pita spokesperson of a couple of years ago pita. Yeah, it's a bit of the it's a bit of that unfortunate pita energy
Because it's like, you know the counterpoint against like, you know
The methods and the things that are that are mentioned that are awful or like
clear, but when the thing is like, hey like if you have to like
you know
Go hunting or go fishing and then you you are just directly
Feeding your town with what you're doing directly and it's not a part of the industry. It's just normal ass fishing
Like what's the problem with that? Your heart medication is derived from fish. It's immoral. Okay. I guess I'll just die
Anyway, it was a weird one. It was a weird one. Um, but yeah, that's that's the closest I can think of, you know
Anyway
Yeah
Oh, apparently they had to
Um
Redact some of the stuff they talked about too. Okay. I don't know whatever. I'm not a fucking
I'm not the person. I don't know
Okay
Hey, that's that one. Okay. I've got one. Oh, okay. All right
A terrible documentary
Okay, a documentary that I did not understand even at the time of this release
And people told me, uh, whatever you don't get it
Fucking supersize me
Mmm. I didn't I never actually watched it
So here's what supersize me is right?
Guy says mcdonald's is unhealthy. He eats at all months, right? He decides to eat nothing
But mcdonald's three meals a day right and gets fat
And he's like see
And everyone with a working brain goes. Yeah, no shit. You fucking idiot
You're eating like four fucking thousand calories a day. What the fuck do you think is going to happen? You fucking moron
Yeah, okay, like genuinely bad. I thought that was yeah, okay
Like gen genuinely completely fucking baffling
And people like oh my god, I can't believe how unhealthy mcdonald. I'm never eating there again
I'm like, I'm not going to stand here and fucking defend mcdonald specifically
but like
Like all I can feel is the deep seated emotion of what are you fucking stupid?
Yeah, no, um, there's other points you can make there
But like that first layer isn't much to say like for example, um, I have a cousin who's uh
She specifically like has a whole organization that looks into like
Um areas, uh, you know in certain in certain states where it's like are you living in a neighborhood or in a rural area where literally
Like the only thing near you is uh fast food and the nearest grocery store is like five times the distance compared to the nearest mcdonald's
That sucks
We should do something about that because that's the available food that's cheaper compared to doing a regular grocery
You know a thing like you can talk about that about the availability and the costs and the price and all that stuff for in
Certain areas or neighborhoods where you don't have access to anything, you know
But that's a different discussion that you've got to have on top of just like
Just having that one thing and making that one point
Apparently i'm seeing a lot of people say that he apparently had liver damage from a former drinking problem
That he was using supersize me to blame on mcdonald's
Mmm
Food deserts, there you go. That's your term for that. Um
Yeah, so, you know, uh, that's that's something that I know she's told me about that's that's
A second layer to the point, but you got it. You got to have that second layer
You know just start at the bottom and leave it there
um
Yeah, I should do I should do a
Documentary where I eat wendy's once a week
And see how it improves my happiness
Sounds like it would improve your happiness a lot
Dude, I want to wendy's so bad like the whole podcast i've been sitting here going like man, I could go for some fucking wendy's right now
Cool. All right, the the patties are a square woolly. It's better that way because his grandma told him to not cut corners
I
Was that is that really? Yeah
Do you know that?
No, I didn't know that because Dave thomas's grandma told him never cut corners
So that's the only the only thing I know about Dave thomas is that he was adopted and wendy's had the charity stuff for adopted kids
Oh, that's yeah, that's that's why they're square
That's cool. Fucking hey, you want to go wendy's
All right, you go figure that out
Okay
Bye everybody