Castle Super Beast - SBFC 027: The Time You Got Punched In The Dick
Episode Date: February 11, 2014The Friendcast grabs a paddle and survives the games industry's massive dump river this week. From Flappy Bird to Dungeon Keeper to Sony to the Heavenly Sword movie, this one's gonna be rough. Ask us ...anything at superbestfriendcast [at] gmail [dot] com! Â
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You know what's a really good idea just hit me just nail it right in the nuts hey man
you can't you can't criticize other people's turn-ons you have no idea no we
just hey hey shut your fucking shut the fuck up I know you are already recording
this very so let's not talk about this we're not gonna intro the episode with
dick punch all I want to talk about the time you got punched in the dick I've
been punched in the dick many times in my life how many times were voluntary
voluntary zero encourage zero no right now we can arrange that type of show not
here because we're being sponsored by dickpunchers.com next week dickpunchers.com
slash super I have to don't go to that that's not real you typing in URLs
involving words dick and or puncher no it can't be good speaking of that like
like websites like that you see that that brassers is gonna pick up CM Punk
it's a real story brassers like a CM Punk join up work for your come work for us
just be around just be around he's just gonna stand in the background be a
spritzer no cut promos about how they won't push certain porn stars that'd be
awesome he's gonna start a real revolution in the industry and his
movie is called like the go to sleep so it's perfect totally take up porn stars
and dropping them into a crazy me yeah exactly do that he's straight edge porn
is not no that's not a pro there's likely enough cocaine just floating
through the air yeah he doesn't partake long as he wears a gas mask we got
this convincing CM Punk lookalike he just has to wear this guy yeah cover his
whole face that is so can recognize the tattoo don't mind the Pepsi and the
cobra tattoo dick puncher's volume 16 presented by CM Punk yeah Snoop Dogg
had a lot of points so why not he did he did didn't he and then he went to
Jamaica and was reincarnated as a lion by the scorpion death yeah now not
Snoop line anymore wait what didn't he go back to be exactly cross-tech I think
you've seen old stuff where they still use his name it's honestly really good
yeah cuz he signed up for a bunch of deals before he was reincarnated as Snoop
Dogg yeah long-running deals but he never stopped doing the porn though so
now he's porn lion why are you so why can't hip-hop have class anymore wow
episode 27 off to a rollicking good start hip-hop what a phenomenal needs more
porn growing punchingly good start dick punch in porn line grab it then punch
it with a lion hmm that's how you do it big furry fist coming right at you it's
good advice yeah that's not advice it's a warning life that's hip-hop yeah that's
hip-hop that's hip-hop limb week go weak bravely default that's everything right
I've played so much bravely default you have fantastic I've noticed like tons
really when you get a new game that you're interested in you play the shit
out of it super hard super early yeah I want to finish it there's no decade
wrong that's tomorrow it's like his cartridge is just a shell it's a dry
husk that cripples out of the game yes yeah no I'm playing the shit out of it
and when I talked to Pat about it yesterday yes or whenever he said the
thing I wanted to say first so I'm gonna say it first this time I don't
remember and that's how really default uses free-to-play ideas so well it's
true like a page okay hold on let's back up before we talk about all that
weird shit we should probably mention bravely default is fucking awesome so
good you've been missing jrpgs they're back yeah especially if you hate
fantasy yeah in cartridge form now talk about your village counts I have 34
guys in my village guys only no you have this village that gets populated with
people you street pass with and you can assign people within that village your
little NPCs to construct and it takes them a certain amount of time to construct
and you just leave your DS on sleep mode or whatever and you just come back after
while and stuff's built yeah but it's not like certain other games where you
have to pay to make the construction go quicker you just play the goddamn game
while you're doing it yeah and eventually you just get more stuff there is also a
free-to-play element in the game with sp points which are things that you get
extra turns and fights you can buy them but it's way easier to just put your
3ds in sleep mode and earn them just as fast as you would buying them so and
they're crazy overpower all the really good stuff and all the sp stuff is like
game breakingly I wouldn't say game breaking but i'm breaking the game with it
getting the angel bow like that really is game breaking but where i'm getting to
the angel bow is starting to get so there's basically microtransactions but
instead of real money it's usually there's people there are microtransactions
there is a single microtransaction and it is totally useless and it's way
better to use the in-game version right all of this how it should be all of this
conspires like you look at it like what's the big gameplay idea is they want
this game to be the game that's always on in your 3ds and always in sleep mode
yeah because a lot of the features have to do with sleep pass a lot of them have
to do with street pass a lot of them have to do with these these like totally
legit timers that count down for bonuses and you just end up like it's always
i i never turn it off i always turn my my handhelds off
always but never anymore not this one i brought it here today i don't bring my
handhelds out of my house and it ties in so well to nintendo's whole 3ds thing of
we want you to carry it around totally street pass coins and all that but it's
so hard to back to the fact it was like made for japan first never thinking
you know whatever uh well they kind of fix that because you can connect to the
internet once per day and get three villagers which is way more people than
no i know that now but like just in the original race yeah i'm very thankful we only got the
the new version even though i complained that we didn't get the original i am a big fan of the
new thing it's way better there's always going to be the second version on games like this or
like monster hunter just don't give us the first one just let us know we're gonna give us a second
give us the ultimate or improved version that comes out international edition what's the actual
little micro thing that has the difference it is the sp points what that is is you can
you can only have three at once the sp drink costs how much does it cost it costs a buck
it costs a dollar and it gives you three right away but when you use it anytime as well so you
can work for your stuff when your uh three days is asleep every eight hours you'll get one point
so considering how i play the game it's always asleep i got all the points immediately i get to
use them they are totally like you don't have to use them i i've used them they're really fun
because they don't give you one full turn they give you one action yeah sure and and what happens is
that uh like the little icon that you would hit to get that is really small and hidden away in the
ui it is not like a big giant it's not annoying that says pay us money and the only thing that
alludes to that is there's a tutorial at the beginning explaining explaining how to use the
function and it's just like you can buy them and it's gone and then when you use it there's a little
quip that the characters say and one of the quips is you mean there's a way to get sp faster
that's the only thing they do there's never any like it does not push okay okay it tells you hey
there's no upsell if you want this it's here and then you get that within the first hour yeah you
want to say and then it bleeds along and it doesn't make you use one during the tutorial it does
but you have free ones okay right so and then you just get one more after eight hours all right
i just thought of a scumbag port system uh imagine if games got ported and were free to play
like full it's already free to play but every time you save you gotta pay yeah to make a save yeah
enjoy that there are there are people imagine that shit there are people that you know you know what
you know what game that would be that would be resident evil by your film by your classic resident
evil exactly by increments cost money in crib he had two increments to start if you want extra
increments yeah you can pay uh whatever seven increments for ten bucks damn well yeah like like
i'm just thinking of like the ea splushing all over the place at the thought of that concept
hey man maybe you don't give them ideas man they've done enough god damn it yeah dead space for play
it and save at a cost but the game's free yeah except that feature already existed in prior dead
space games oh what that feature did not exist for pay but it did exist i believe in dead space
two where you got there was a one of the hardest difficulty modes i forgot what it was called the
hardest difficulty game you could only save three times the entire game but on the 360 you could
cheat it because when you switch disks you got a free auto save yeah so it's slightly easier but
that's an optional difficulty that has nothing to do yeah that's my point no no i said it monetized
it but my point is is that would be harder in this case because it would like be so obvious to go
you used to have that for free you bastards yeah and now you're monetizing it yeah new age of scumbag
otherwise i played through outlast and i don't play the whole games at all yeah um you were really
scared you told me you were super scary i played i played 10 minutes of our last conversation earlier
we'll get to it it wasn't a conversation you just laughed at me like 10 minutes of outlast no that's
a lie i got to the menu and the sounds were too scary so i turned it off because it was late at
night and i woke up at eight o'clock the next morning rolled over turned on my ps4 opened the
blinds opened my door turned on the lights started streaming it so i wasn't alone and played through
the entire game that was the only way i couldn't be terrified of it um and it still scared me a lot
even though you were saying it was just jump scares well to me no they're really well executed
they're really well executed jump scares but what scares me is like when it's like a dreading atmosphere
and while it had that it was still more jump scares it would it would scare scared me a lot
i don't play horror games i own a shitload but they're all 10 minutes in
i have that super bad but it was a really fun game i really enjoyed it oh because i started
telling liam about nevermind that kickstarter yeah it's a horror game that you strap a heart monitor
to your chest and liam's like oh okay yeah the game gets scarier as your heart rate goes up
oh great great amazing oh that'll work great yeah that's such a great never gonna play it no that's
such a cool concept because it's so cool once you start getting like half let's say halfway scared
like not terror but like panicky yeah you're you're gonna try and make the effort to just like
yeah yeah try to beat the liars beat the machine just and they're they're they're saying that it
can be a stress um training tool yeah yeah i was gonna say if you could play it a lot you'd
train yourself yeah the only question is do these guys know how to do it and can they get
enough devices because who are they what's their training you know hard to do it no i'm gonna
play some more horror games here i'm gonna try playing daylight when that comes out sure well
atlas is publishing and i'm gonna play psycho break uh everyone's gonna play psycho break slash
the evil within right it's called i'm gonna play psycho break yeah we're only gonna play psycho
break hey like take some take some tape and put it over your box so psycho break japan got the good
resident evil title they got biohazard which way better than rest evil yeah we get the good
title this time or evil within is i feel it's a much do you feel so at like psycho break sounds
a little goofy okay i like it they're they're both good but evil within sounds more like a classic
tale of horror yeah and it also is clearly more calling back to resident evil yes well i'm sure
that's what Bethesda was yeah you know what can you come up with a title that's a little more
fuck you resident evil the last story last nothing will ever top the last story in terms of
pure title fuck yeah it's definitely right yeah it was my week right i was uh terror
mad week go uh i finally caught up with hajmen no epa all the way to like the last episode
and woolly i'm gonna say a word to you and you tell me if you will jump in at hajmen no epa
listening counter breakers
so there's too many i'm gonna like i don't usually do this but i'm gonna tell you
like summarize what's happened in this version of hajmen no epa which i'm sure is 25 episodes
there's two main opponents and the first one is a what we talk about a pure fucking psychopath
who stabbed his dad to death when he was like five great and gets put into like juvie yeah his mom
never comes and sees him so he grows up alone and then his social worker or his teacher is like
i i can help integrate you back into society by introducing you to boxing and then he's like
holy shit this was the wrong fucking move because he tears dudes apart and he's always talking about
meat and steak and how he wants to make sure the right is the most delicious he's ever had
there's always licking things it's really weird so then he's at a press conference and he just tells
ipo the demcy rolls fucking garbage and everyone's like and they're like he knows how to defeat the
demcy roll so the entire time they're like ipo what are you gonna do and he's like i have to
evolve the demcy roll and then when he figures out how to do it his like massage therapist
trainer is like if you do this new like evolution of the demcy roll it will shorten your life if you
do it more than twice right and he goes and he's so mad at this psycho guy because he disrespects
boxing and cheats all the time he's like i will use it as many times as possible so when he does
the regular demcy roll twice and both times the guy counters it just punches him straight in the
face everyone's like holy shit and then he does it a third time and then in the middle of the demcy
roll he stops but all of his momentum is still in his body and all of his veins start popping out
and then the guy already did the counter and then ipo just waits and does it again with all the
stored up momentum i just read counter breaker it's the shinshore you can that drains your life
instead of your super barn exactly so he like that's what happens when you take the limiters off
right and like it's not really spoiler because that's not really the end of the fight but whatever
and then i think i discussed this before but there is an opponent i threw his name out and all you
guys went oh yeah and his name was an american and his name was bread hawk is he the wolf guy
no it's not the wolf guys this is asshole american uh but there's a new guy who's the most noble american
champion blonde hair blue eyes suits uh science kids autographs and his name is david eagle
i don't know what is with this but americans are named after birds they got a bunch of cool birds they
yeah they love birds they love bald eagles and the other thing that's like weird about hajana
even if you guys like you know even the simplest thing is the biggest move ever is the super move
it's when someone just changes their stance or he goes it was his true stance
of course he was a south park you can't do that in fucking poxie like you can't just change
isn't that the whole like crux of like rocky too um but i'm saying but that's but that's sports
anime in general sports anime yeah that's like making a mountain out of a fucking mole hill it's
like well you should know how to defeat south pas but i wasn't aware that he was gonna feel it
shouldn't be an issue you po yeah so that was really hype um i got bravely default i only got
like an hour into it because i really have time to go into much of it um and i gave my rats away
to the two of the three dark girls who introduced me to rats because since i'm moving they got a
lot of rats well now they don't but now they do because i just gave them both my rats rocks
all right they keep burning through rats they keep burning through rats and they're not accustomed
to girl rats they're like but why aren't they fighting constantly i'm like because they're
girls and not boys boys then they should be fighting more they should be fighting more so that was
kind of a bittersweet moment but they really like they know rats better than i do and they'll like
take super great care of them but i guess it was just it wasn't a fit for the new place uh it's
also a fit for the new place is that rats tend to die due to stress oh really because their hearts
explode like me right so when zack's around zack doesn't notice the rats at all doesn't even care
but the rats freak out they're like what is this fucking white ball right why is it so like i just
thought i should take that out of the equation and whenever i want to go visit them but now the
rats know who you love more not really they're not that smart actually so they're really smart
they probably forgot about them they're too stressed out we should get them to play nevermind
and uh two of you want to kill them quicker yeah yeah to train them what is this animal monsters are
giant cats in late mouse traps um and the last last thing i think you two will be happy i turned
on my vita yeah and i downloaded what did you try download i i downloaded uh muramasa yeah oh yeah
because i was watching game center cx uh spirit of the ninja and i was like i want to play muramasa
again i might as well get the newest version of it yeah and i downloaded olly olly but i didn't
start it yet right right so but i those farmers look awesome those farmers the dlc the dlc character
oh yeah no but i didn't even touch that yet i thought you're talking about the first dlc's
out where you play as the cat girl yeah i know that's it's really cool actually is it the cat girl
the fox girl or are they both foxes no no the cat girl okay it's taking them a while to get around
to those characters but it's but it's quality yeah i know you feel it you're like yeah they're working
and they do players four and the second one's coming out soon in japan i think they put out
it yeah they put out a trailer for the farmer guys yeah so well it's one guy but then there's the other
team that he teams up with yeah exactly also some of us saw the lego movie yeah go see the lego
really entertaining it was fucking awesome everything was awesome everything was awesome
i saw that that song was written by teagan and sarah and lonely island oh there's a wrap part
that's okay yeah teagan and sarah and crossed lonely island right on it was pretty good yeah
really entertaining yeah for sure yeah pat is it me now we get to talk about so i played a bunch
of really the default we talked about shocking uh true detective is back willy have you started
to watch true detective i haven't you need to go you need to get out because the latest true detective
episode four a six minute godlike one-shot moving like action scene no editing that puts like children
of men to shame don't say to shame to shame then who are there there is a moment in which
the one shot follows them climb over a six foot tall fence and i went back to watch it and go how
how does the camera follow them in this shot first of all children of men 13 minutes yeah i know
second of all it's a tv show gravity it's a fucking tv show gravity now he's all cg
not all of it most of it there was some really you'll see it and you'll you'll understand it
i'm not hyperboleizing it is an amazing it's an impressive long shot the sentence for this
and the cinematography in that particular episode is way over the top did you catch who was directing
no okay probably second guy whenever you notice really good like like cinematography
take a look at the name who's directing and see what else they've done i don't look at credits
that's a very shitty thing to now look at what would you like i'm done the things over think of
all the minutes he saves though yeah not that i would ever do it but like considering the amount
of content pat digest also that's hours a week also i have to take i mad at nintendo because oh you
so i don't know if matt talked about it on the podcast but a while ago he got a wiwi battery
like a larger wiwi battery i didn't uh and he got it and he installed it no problems i said hey why
not i'll buy this expanded wiwi battery from the nintendo store officially from nintendo yeah
so it took like a month and a fucking half to show up first of all it's it's in stock as soon as i
touched it it's back ordered thanks where is it was it from the states sir yeah it's from to club
nintendo where you get fucked on custom yeah i didn't but may have also the what is hilarious
nintendo's own website for their own products does not have an account system the only way to look
up your order is to take your order number and punch it into a service report like because it's
for repairs and parts yeah it's like it's not sealed for so the thing comes in the mail i open it up
matt you were there you saw it happen i open it up i look at the instructions and say hey man
take the provided screwdriver yeah and fucking unscrew your wiwi game pad guess what no fucking
screwdriver they fucked me it says use the provided screwdriver right there so i go to
websites and the description has been updated after i bought it to say no longer include screwdriver
i'll loan you a screwdriver that's how you really feel no this bullshit that's really funny all right
that is garbage and it is and that's how god has blinded pat this week no that's not actually
there's a different god has blinded pat how could anything be more terrible and and life
was stopping yeah a bell canada employee oh did you murder him i can game to my door tell me
there's blood you're cleaning up right now no no oh those guys a bell canada so i live in a high rise
apartment building which should be safe from door to door telephone man it's not even easy to
find his door if you know where it is so he comes to my door i look at him i look at his little tag
that says bell canada and i go no yeah i just say no he snuck in and he says hey are you no no no no
no no no i'm not gonna yell i'm not gonna scream but you need to go you need to put me on whatever
list you need to put me on and get out of my face is but are you happy with your service
you have to understand you do you subscribe to bell and no yeah okay and i am like i am clearly
like shaking yeah with the restraint no do not kill him no these fuckers break into your apartment
buildings because the commission they get is huge yeah and that's that's what they're relying on
and they don't care how much but i am i am i am literally coming up hard at the seams at which
point each tries again it's like don't just don't yeah just don't if i ever see you back here again
ever and he goes he like waits for me to finish and i just glare and i'm i'm i wish i lived in the
U.S. so that i could have threatened him with a gun and not gone to jail i could have just pointed
a gun at him and say get out of my house go away and everything would have been fine
and they would have never come back they would have written on the thing crazy asshole has gone
you can't even do that in the states so i am i am i am legitimately considering getting a bat
just to hold you can't do that either yes you can you can as long as you do not hold or brandish
the weapon in a threatening manner oh and you hold the bat below the waist lazily why do you know
so much about this i have no idea why i thought he meant an actual bat like the animal they're
delicious they're chicken of the chicken as a familiar it's like if you shoot someone below
the waist you're not going to get attempted murder it becomes like a battery or assault charge
because murder was right intent so if you hold the bat or maybe just place the bat in view perhaps
i could borrow your x one day and just have the item in clear view and hold it or touch it in a
non-threatening manner your face will say everything that you don't need to that's just anyone who
works for bel canada and is listening to this do not send someone to my house what's your address
no i'm not going to do that that's really shocking yes yes fuckers that's really shocking that he
would even give him that amount like i would just assume you would see his net and say no and close
your door like i don't even know why you gave him that much time yeah generally generally you just
you open and you shut and no he needs to know not to come back if you're not and if you're lucky
i thought that would be enough to tell him no if you're lucky no it's not you won't get the foot
in the door which is the he gets the foot in the door he also gets my foot in his ass yeah
because no that's a particular that's a Mormon technique uh the foot in the door i've had that
happen yeah i i i i pushed harder yeah like i pulled it back and i swung not enough shut again
because i am not gonna let you slam the door in my face until you know how much just loves you
my uh my mom had that thought happened to her where uh it wasn't a Mormon it was that was a
Jehovah's Witness that was campaigning to the nearby houses and he totally put the foot in the
door and it was me and my mom alone at home yeah so she didn't like it so her reaction was we had
one of those little baby gates yeah that would keep our hunter you i know one of those we had a
very large very protective dog that did not like guests and it just became the arguments like listen
guy my son can just pop the gate before you can get in the house do you want to come in the house
now do you feel lucky and i you know messed with the gate a little bit and the dog is going nuts
he's foaming he wants to kill this guy right we never we would never bothered at that house ever
again by anybody so the solution to all your soliciting problems is implicitly threatened
to murder solicitors rap could put a not it's not no not explicitly implicitly threaten them
rabbit dog foaming out the mouth and if you are a solicitor and say hey man i'm just trying to do
i'm trying to get paid i'm trying to make a living fuck you fuck you no one cares you sold
your dignity when you took that job that's what this is this is the harsh rule of solicitors
so that's that's what happened this week sick okay all right so what did you do wait uh i didn't
do that um i just like basically blasted my way through um late between worlds finally
finished and uh yeah definitely enters my my list of favorites elders uh pretty it's good
really easy but it's very easy but enjoy it not when you first enter low rule for that first
yeah no and and the last the last two dungeons like spike up the the difficulty um and the
length which was appreciative but i liked the fact that it went back to being old dungeon
length for those two so that was good um last fight little um no nothing little no a little
but i enjoyed the like uh we're going to have you defeat gannon in a way that
well gannon quote-unquote in a way that's gannon looks like all the stories of yeah it was cool
you know it was it was enjoyable to have that little like tie-in that it's trying to make it into
like a mythic moment exactly and it was it was pretty nice um with that little thing you have to
figure out three and then after the credits he's after the credits like puts on major's mask right
right exactly yeah uh for me the only moment in that game where i was like oh shit was when i
went to low rule in uh hero mode and i touched an enemy and instantly melted my bones all turned
to powder yeah like he did like eight hearts or something yeah that's why hero mode's there exactly
you have you like put any work at all into the shadow lake battles uh i did a little bit yeah
yeah because i mean like at first i was annoyed by them and then i kind of figured out what the
deal was and i was like this is this is interesting they're super optional anyway so like you don't
even have to touch it um and i don't even know what you're talking about there's uh there's a no i got
to low rule i'm about halfway through low rule i don't know what the hell is going on this is even
before you do shadow links that like stand around every time you shoot past with someone ah that would
explain why i've never seen it it's a shame because it's a good feature yeah and you do a little link
on link battle and it kind of shows you that that is straight up like the dark souls invasion
they carry stolen it is that is exactly what that is if you want it's not live though you have to
talk to the length yeah sure but it's getting there but it is and you know and the person's not playing
as their character sure it's just but steal more stuff from dark souls i really want zelda to just
go full dark souls with invasions yeah i have character i have people be able to play as like a
moblin no try and kill you just dark dark dark link shadow links invading everywhere yes that would
be the best it would be a great spin off or optional mode that would be a great mainline zelda
yeah i can't get out of shadow link right i can't get out of kokorei forest because there's too many
grown-up battle you say kokorei what is what is what is wrong with you kokiri did they pronounce it
in the game i believe it was actually found somewhere every review i've ever seen is where i said kokiri
no no no wait hold on a minute hold on a minute that's it say that again kokorei kokorei where
did they pronounce it anywhere in every single review i've ever seen of a of a zelda game every
one no but to him it's to him it's not gonna separate to me and my friends growing up it was that
no and like and like justify that word they pronounce it anywhere in the game you are that
asshole that called her tifa you are that guy that was tifa that's who you're being right now
liam erith no that's actually what it's supposed to be that's a totally different thing yeah okay
no but i'm not being an asshole that's just how i do do you want us to go through old nintendo
interviews and find reggie saying kokiri is that what you want that's just as non-canon as the game
so how does it become canon if the japanese guys say it but the japanese guys would say it with a
weird accent doesn't matter they're the ones who wrote it so liam what's that big tree that you
run into deku tree deku tree okay that's acceptable just checking just i've heard deku also and i don't
think that's a deep like would be with a double because one league defeats get on
there's something that has no canon pronunciation you guys are getting really anal no it's just funny
because i've never heard that before i've never heard that ever all right to be fair we go nuts when
woolly says three dough what's the three dough but that's yeah yeah oh god damn it you're still
doing that but no he hasn't done in a while but we went nuts and all fairness that's an abbreviation
yeah but it's the only way i'm saying yeah but i never call it the nintendo odds
what nintendo ds but see abbreviate see abbreviations or acronyms can be pronounced
initialisms yes initialisms can't so you never say the phobia no say the fbr no one says the
nests or the snests those aren't those aren't initialisms nintendo entertainment system
super nintendo entertainment system but the fuck is wrong with you each shit you're wrong moving on
dammit but those are words from our country no you're done though dammit dammit i am full of
shit anything aside from zeldo my whole life i know i really i really just tried to beat the
shit out of that and that was most of my week so i'm sure you noticed how ridiculously smooth it
was yeah did you get did either of you guys get a one jittery bit where like you transition from
somewhere and it goes to like one fps yes i thought that the worst for a second i totally had framerate
issues it's so jarring one was upon entering um the lost woods yeah and another was like teleporting
considering how immaculate the framerate is isn't that something to do with 30 no it's just a loading
random transition between two areas but i'll tell you if it does and uh but i will say like like
the moment you move that stick around man that feels smooth oh it feels like yeah i was originally
like i was like i'm i don't know about this rental system with the items and stuff i was like i kind
of like going into a dungeon and finding the new power-up type of thing just tradition but by the
end when didn't even really notice by the end yeah you're like okay whatever this is fine you get so
plus plus one thing that fucking every game that's all the game needs the ability to level up your
items man you can do which in some games you can and you can get like better we can level up the
master sword yes and you can level up the your bows and certain other games but this you can level
up every single item yeah and i'm like i love that i want every game to have every game should you
played skyward sort right yeah yeah that had the best skyward sort did it really badly but the
effects were good the principle and how they were doing it was like the way to do them was exactly
it was terrible wait no no on paper i thought it was great i mean like grabbing like rare items yeah
in the zelda context where every time you pick up the rare item they fucking give you the text
like that's the worst but on paper i think that's cool get the items and upgrade your gear sure but
i mean like in we'll get 10 sharp stones in the context of skyward sword like you are using it
to surface one of the worst parts about the series which is let me skip this fucking text you
bastard i know so they did they didn't do that in uh link between worlds that i don't remember
ever picking up a rupee it's more than once they knew that it would you had to pick up so many
rookies yeah oh my god you never thought because they nailed that in wind waker you pick up the
first seed you pick up the first uh necklace or whatever yeah yeah once and one of the thing
that's it's not even a complaint it's just a missed opportunity um they could have had
you doing a bit more while you were on the walls yeah they could have done more because
there's a little laughing you know you just you yeah but no no it's true but also i got addicted
to i want to look find every single thing on every single wall yeah which yeah which is why
i wanted more of that i wanted there to be more i was gonna say my real my biggest beef with the
game is just that when you shoot a shot from your sword it's not the sound effect is so limp
and unsatisfying the cartoon sound effects well because the cartoon sound effect is the original
legend of zelda sound but it would be too slow for how often you're shooting it it's true but
fuck that sounds so good i don't care it sounds really good the the current sound is just not
very satisfying but when they give you that patch of grass in in uh low rule that you can slice all
the way through it's pretty satisfying right on that was pretty much me man yeah it was a good
week except for all that stuff that happened oh too too much stuff happened man what was the
first thing that happened all right so do you want to just talk about watchdogs right the
fuck now no actually i want to talk about flappy bird oh god damn that flappy bird chronicles
i'd rather not talk about this because it's some dumb that but what the whole industry's done
you got two minutes to summarize this week of flappy bird i mean it's either that or
fucking polygon talk and you really want to go there unless it's about that street fighter article
and then what right well what's flappy bird flappy bird is a game that was made by uh dong dong newian
and it was nothing it's a super nothing game it's a tap bird flyer it's apparently quite hard and you
fly through like obstacle pipes and that's it this shit uh goes up on the ios star and his this game
and like i think the three or four other games he made suddenly out of nowhere after being on the
ios shop for six months spike up super high yeah so clearly dude must have probably paid paid a company
to do that to go in and get his ratings up and get his downloads up but he got his payback and he
must have made a shit ton of money or he was any bargain for the peak he was making $50,000 a day
and um some uh analysts people were looking at it going if he monetized correctly he could have
made about a cool million actually i'm sure um and then everyone looked at it and went you
fucking like basically copied the pipes from mario and made a shitty ass bird yeah it's a shitty ass
mobile game yeah i hate you you just kill yourself blah blah blah internet hate yep and he basically
comes out and goes i can't deal with this it has ruined my simple life it has ruined my simple life
and you almost feel bad for him like actually he removes yeah yeah as he's wiping his tears away
with thousand dollar bills i think that's hilarious it's it's true but at the same time it's like
you know he just didn't want everyone to tell him to die yeah which in all fairness is unreasonable
for anyone to tell you to die when you scum out the app store like that but is that worth being
told to die no like but it's like boo but at the same time you should have been which is what i'm
saying i almost feel bad for art i would almost you're not quite there had everyone been more
reasonable with criticisms i would have been like i don't feel bad for him at all this is the
internet or if he gave some of that money to charity or something as a as a person who speaks on the
internet that gets told to die on a daily basis i also enjoy this privilege i think that you can
be a little bit more thick skinned about it as you're making some some people who's new to it
scamming somebody now let's now let's be clear some people don't have thick skin can't grow thick
skin date like it is not fair to generalize against everybody's saying it's the internet fucking
buck up people tell you to die all the time that is the case however this guy did a dirtbag and made
a shitty game and got rich and who for him and within within hours you had like 13 or 14 clothes
shooting up the charts with just where they took the flappy bird thing as shit as it was and just
threw in microtransactions because someone said you're not monetizing yeah yeah so i i'm gonna be
the first one to show you how to do that pay 69 cents to make that ad disappear well and that one
where the guy had a name called like happy b yeah and he renamed it to flappy b yeah and it was already
on this totally because when someone searches for flappy on the ios store they put down with the
first thing because they get through yeah so you just gotta put up their flappy saga yeah flappy
you know flappy birds so flappy bird perfectly encapsulates the mobile industry and i think it
was capcom recently came out and said they took like huge mobile losses they're like we don't
understand mobile and we're making really good games on mobile why don't people like it because
capcom sees shit like flappy bird and said one guy made that for say 20 we can have 10 guys make
it a hundred times better for a thousand dollars so we'll get a hundred times more money right but
it doesn't scale yeah and the reason it's no is because flappy bird proves that the ios store in
the entire mobile market is a lottery it is a total lottery quality publicity like graphics
monetization nothing matters nothing matters here's the thing though there are companies that
have worked it down to a science that consistently have titles that go rank rank high on release
a couple of times but like and then they're game walk game walk is a pretty good example the only one
i could think of but yeah but they have dudes that are their entire job is to figure out
how to make it it's not hard to figure it out just learn call that number well and real racing
yeah your number well i mean you recall that that uh imager imager post where they just collected all
the uh similar clone games that were like build a base defend your fortress from enemy attack
thank you you're totally right but the distinction i want to make is the game loft actually makes
games yeah at least three games what companies want to chase is they want the next angry birds
just like in the console space everyone wants the next call of duty well right and those games
are absolutely pure chance the ones i hate are the the japanese ones that are really cropping up
which is like the the collect monsters and fight and not just cards but like specifically monsters
it's very weird so puzzle and dragons was the one that hit it big course and it's got this menu
structure that i hate where everything has to go because those are all evolved out of gambling
like video poker machines yeah exactly anyway uh sega did one the fucking demons tribe and uh
square next just put out dragon quest monsters super light and they made a million bucks overnight
and they made another million bucks the next day i downloaded it the day came out one of
it's still available in america that is some hot shit it is not good the menu structure is so
fucking poor you spend more time in the goddamn menus than you do in these little nothing dungeons
next to no strategy and then you go back to the menus god forbid you want to fuse a creature
because you'll be in there twice the time so flappy bird so flappy bird so flappy bird did you guys
play flappy bird no i don't fucking i downloaded it because i was like what's this flappy bird i
don't have to pay for it let's go within 15 minutes i deleted it uh got a high score of 11 it was not
worth my time yes no and and no but i mean like it was nothing a dude remade the entire game in
3d that looked better in an hour right and he recorded the entire thing you can watch him
make it right it's up there did you see the iphone's going on ebay that have preloaded
flappy the rare game flappy bird preloaded on this iphone for a thousand dollars we should
preface that with you can't download flappy bird anymore it's gone it's gone he took it
oh so simple life is you can buy my iphone on ebay for $50,000 just go to ebay dot com
combine flappy bird and and dungeon keeper and what you get is the image i was well i was about
to go do we are we gonna talk about that's next that's next let's go on but but like going into
flappy dungeon yeah but the last thing i wanted to say on this was um if you really want to like
just ooze all the scum out of this this entire fucking thing ooze or squeeze or what's the you
juice the juice this it oozes your way you want to you want to juice the scum out of it like squeezing
a towel exactly right um go to the verges article which i'm going to link to where they interviewed
him as like as if he's the next big ios product right like what did you do how did you make it
work what's the formula and he's like and he's like oh yeah no i feel i really feel that flappy
birds at a place where you can't really add or take anything away you know it's holy shit so in the
end he's just a huge dog you see people keep people keep trying to put flappy bird in up and
i'll put a tag on it figure out people try to put a label on a lifestyle we can't put a label on a
lifestyle flappy bird i wish flappy bird would have been what was in the cube yeah sitting
you just get that stupid looking bird coming out flappy bird flaps his way into your heart
absolutely so exactly i got super addicted to it and you know what if you want to play games on a
small device by a veter at 3ds so everyone already owns a phone they already own a phone but there's
better shit than this garbage oh my god like dungeon keeper all right bullfrog great company
made some classics made some amazing classics over the years one of which was dungeon keeper one
of which was syndicate like 15 years ago invented the tower defense genre didn't they also make
buck bumble no don't throw it was some it was some uh no i know um the guys that made this anyway
anyway sorry right awesome legacy now dungeon keeper is a classic pc game in which you play the
villain of a dungeon of a dungeon who is trying to stop the heroes from getting his shed or saving
a princess or whatever and you build all sorts of bullshit all over the place it's like kigara's
deception it's like tower defense yeah um and ea has decided we're gonna bring back dungeon keeper
we're gonna bring it back for mobile devices pretty unforgettable logo with that little
spike to demon head yeah i was like oh shit yeah and they redesigned him and he looks all right
and it's like he belongs on a mobile and it comes out and dungeon keeper is the most abominable
micro transaction in-app purchase written piece a filthy piece of shit garbage that anyone has
ever seen well you're being much nicer than i thought now people throw around the word
unplayable a lot a lot a lot it's true it's a buzzword but rarely do we encounter games that
are literally unplayable peter mollin you comes out and says i this is unplayable what is this
right it is it is a god so the first thing is as you send out your little goblins to like chip
away at the blocks surrounding your little to make rooms square square you have a cave and you have
to mine it wider and like different types of blocks that they mine into take different amounts of time
to break open that's correct in the original game it would take a couple minutes maybe whatever
maybe 30 seconds whatever in this case you have things ranging from four to 24 hours and for a
single block and that is not as you progress that is like block one you could touch and it could
say 24 hours to mine right depending on how many little um density like markings i think they were
smart enough to not put any of the 24 hours one within the first one yeah there are the
because then the jib would be out far too early exactly no yeah a lot of the inner rocks are just
solid brown and then the outer rocks have these markings now if you want to pay some gems which
is the real money currency because there's four currencies of course it'll it'll speed the fuck
up there's stone wood gold and gems i believe three of which are worthless right so you need
all the other ones that you would earn in gameplay and those work as you would but you want to get
past this for a 24 hour timer in like 10 seconds hey how about you pass what a dollar for a single
fucking block of which it wasn't that much it wasn't i may i don't know the exact number
but it's still it's still making a three by three nine block room yeah via the games intrinsic rules
if you don't want to spend more money yeah can take more than a week which is absurd that is gross
on its own but that's not even that's not even the worst part the worst part is that as you go up
the upgrade trees the number of so say you need i need 20 000 gold to build this thing well it is
upgrade in particular your main dungeon room you need to upgrade that to progress in the game right
as and progress in your upgrade tree as well yes and to get that further along you have to spend
x amount of gold on it yeah right but that gold that you need to buy your upgrades you don't you
can't carry enough there the limit on your you've got your baby container yeah is too small the only
way to carry enough is to be able to get enough stone to build a bigger gold gold container and the
numbers on these are all stacked and to be literally impossible to obtain but hold on though not only
that but your stone container is not big enough so you need your wood to make the stone container
so what happens when you got to make the bigger wood container turns out it needs a lot of gold
yeah so it's a big old circular upgrade tree you you hit a point in this game relatively
early i've had friends who who got their hands on it and said not only do you get hit in the face of
micro transactions within five seconds of starting the game but you very early hit a point in which
it becomes very apparent to the player that it will be literally impossible to progress yeah at
any significant faction without like a month of work yeah without paying extra money the example
that was given was your one of your first upgrades is about five six thousand gold to make this thing
whatever yeah and then the second one is fifty thousand gold yeah and then you immediately shoot
up over a hundred for like the third one and the reward of gold through gameplay does not scale
it stays constant the worst thing to me still was the whole review thing which i'm sure you're
aware of that's the absolute worst so before you even get there save that sure sure save that
shit just a gem i was gonna say something really confusing about the whole deal is that when you're
when the monster guy's talking to you he's in his text he's actively making fun of micro
transactions and saying boy this sure is annoying huh well yeah someone's saying had asked for
micro transactions um and people are you taking the piss out of us i don't get it so they're
taking the money out of it so uh a tester that was working on this came out and spoke about it
actually really i didn't see this and he said that while they were testing it they would give
different groups of people that were uh in the late beta uh different price points yeah and see
how frustrated they would get right and basically this is discussed and they would keep increasing
that amount on different groups of people and seeing how it was till in the end they went a little
bit above the highest level of annoyance and that's what they put on that um okay i want to give
shout outs to euro gamer yes for publishing an article basically using dungeon p a dungeon keeper
as the martyr of the cause and pointing out that games that use this kind of monetization
that have replaced money gameplay with monetization are rackets they are fucking scams and the people
who make them are thieves there's no if ands or what buts about it and the great thing about
that review too is that they they say basically look here i go i don't want to review um micro
transactions i want to review the game yeah it's hard to do that it's very hard to do that when
it's all in your face i'm giving it a one on ten for resembling dungeon keeper um jim sterling as
he is occasionally known to do put up with a really good video about it uh yesterday monday
yeah uh and it's that same topic yeah basically like you are you are scammers yeah and if you are
a game developer who works on a game like this like you don't have the right to complain saying
i'm not a scammer you made a fucking scam game and yes your boss may have told you to make that
but you you choose to work there and even better you did so by shitting on something that a lot of
people would care to make a vehicle for theft on the name sort of the v v vehicle on the name that
was trusted prior to and it has gotten so bad that the game's press is now just coming out and saying
yeah mobile gaming it's a fucking scam the whole thing's a scam um so the lot yeah i wanted to
just say quickly that uh also you can't die yeah of course they're you used to be able to die no if
you died you wouldn't pay any more dungeon keeper you could totally fail okay and in this case you
don't fail i thought i thought you meant on this new dungeon keeper you could die but then they
patched it out no it's like it's straight up like you you can't fail you can simply get
deducted your resources wow that's trash um and then and you just grind it back up you grind
the back up because oops you took a hit and that's it oops i went back down um now the absolute now
will you let me let me ask you what has ea's response been to all of this criticism hasn't
been enough what response the response as actually no they have responded to the torrent of criticism
and the response has consistently been hey man people like it people love dungeon keeper look
how high it's rated on the am star oh there we go which takes us to the juiciest more so you
take it away app phone games have this thing where every now and again it'll be like hey radar game
do you like it do you want to rate our game one to five stars dungeon keeper has the worst one
ever made alternately the best one ever made if you're ea so it gives you the option of rating
actually yeah it's it's so clever you're like why hasn't any there are two buttons there's two
buttons for a five star rating system one of them is a little blue button it says one to four stars
the other one is a big fat green button and that's the heart of the gym happy it's like an emerald
green and it says five stars now this is on the android one you hit the five star one it's a
five star bam you hit one to four it brings you to a form you can fill out to send to ea about
what we can do to make the game better it says do you want to keep rating this or do you want to
write us a letter with your feedback and if you write them a letter with your feedback you don't
rate the you have to go rate it on your own time you're playing dungeon keeper at ea outside the
game naturally skews the fuck out of the thing it is it is the equivalent of of of you know closing
down voting booths early so that people who have jobs can't go gerrymandering filibusters all of that
shit there is a simpsons episode where homer picks a choice and he goes you picked b no i didn't i'm
almost positive like it's exact same stuff yeah so i can't believe how gross that is really brilliant
way to get around that ea manages to consistently outdo themselves and to me the worst thing of this
is like you look at it and the asset everything's sound just the the structure of the game the game
does appear well made it's so abhorrent and terrible which makes it all more tragic if the
design were not this terrible terrible contrived money-making machine it seems to me like there
could have been a good game made here and the part that's really like kind of poetic i feel about
the whole thing is that hey if you look at dungeon keeper mobile and be like i'm interested in this
kind of game or i love dungeon keeper i wish i could play dungeon keeper you can go to goodoldgames.com
and get the original tooth dungeon keepers for i think like six dollars this is where all those
and those will be games that you can play those dudes they need the flappy bird clones i want
those guys to get on this and go here's the non-scam version yeah why not clone of dungeon keeper
yeah you like i think he has such a big company that when they should have learned their lesson
about sim city well there's how many controversies going on at right at any given moment but they
getting a fucking offline mode for fuck's sake it was said to be impossible the the whole negative
backlash about that which was huge and so much so that they reversed their decision you think those
lessons would have filtered down to the department why was they no here's why here's why they'll
never do it because back in 2009 rickatello said we're gonna focus on making good games
we're gonna make new ip's we're gonna do good and we don't want everyone to hate us we're gonna
make shit like dead space we're gonna make stuff like mirror's edge we're gonna make the old republic
and publish stuff like brutal and we're gonna support harmonics and it almost killed ea well
they almost went under it was an uncommitigated economic because i was about to say do you remember
that period of time when activision were the bad guys yes ea were the guys bad guys activision
sure they just recently announced that they decided that sledgehammer games instead of making
their own ip like they were called i promise when they came on would instead come make call of duty
so now that you can get three teams making call of duty there was there was that there was that one
time three year cycle is way better it is it is ultimately i also feel bad for sledgehammer oh me
too but and think and what that does for the brand as well man because now you're gonna have well now
they have three years to make a better game but now you're gonna have two off years oh oh
how does sledgehammer is amazing right in the end they can't be any worse than fucking infinity
ward i can't believe how infinity ward has become the shit here you hear that new patch drops the
framerate multiplayer to like 30 frames a second wow what the fuck is going on what a great patch
i was gonna say there was that time that activision was basically lord genome and yeah vivendi was the
anti-spirals the greater evil man description of it oh fine go for a little guy it is it has come
to the point where boycotting ea is really easy it's really really easy you just don't want to play
that what do they have to offer me like i didn't i didn't play dead space three oh no the series i
loved you ruined it oh i'll have to get it on origin guess i won't then the only thing that is
taking fall and i i love battlefield and this fucking debacle has turned me way the fuck off
well i was just gonna i was just gonna say like is it really a boycott if you just say i want to
play good games it's not a boycott it's just it's just i know it becomes the easiest boycott ever
it's an inadvertent boycott they have you're not acting they have made it really easy for people
that are morally outraged by their products to not buy their products by making their products
unappealing so guess what well you're gonna be running down a hallway and it's gonna do you want
to learn how to slide pay us three dollars so faith can learn how to i am now reconvinced that
mirrors edge two will not happen it's so i'm gonna have that one's gonna okay here's why it's gonna
happen because it's a it's a fucking watch him a project it's vanity project as long as it's my
wallpaper at work it's okay but but here's why i don't believe in that game anymore because dice is
supposed to make it and dice can't even get the dlc for battlefield out in all fairness they probably
care a lot more about mirrors and it's probably probably they have more than one team i would hope
so you know the a guys are on near don't like i all man willy you and i love mirrors edge a whole
lot i think oh we all do you don't like mirrors i love mirrors now you like it i'm the only one
you guys make fun of me about faith all the time i don't know how you love those terrible
animated cutscenes but i love mirrors edge i remember talking to you and we had the argument
over whether or not you we prefer the the long version of the time trials or the short versions
yeah okay mirror how we all really like it amazing lower platinum trophy willy i really
thought you guys were all just shitting on me about willy no it's just fun to get on you willy
take your hopes and put them in the trash take your and and if there's a there's a reason to
bring your hope out of the trash do so but don't keep don't hold them up don't care stop when you
should be using the word faith faith damn it that's like a built-in singer don't worry we'll cut it
say it again like like just like to put your faith in the trash there we go like just ha ha
faith or jade just give me one of these characters beyond good evil two's coming just give me them
just like fantasy star online it's coming too we made a bet you and i that it would not come out in
fucking 2013 and then you change the bet to 2014 and i'm still gonna win it i'm still gonna win it i
actually don't even think i did change it to 2014 oh no we did i don't think i did i remember you guys
talking about it i know we only shook on it for 2014 because it was this year yeah that game's never
coming out in the west but 2014 is a good cutoff date anyway so it's gonna come out in 2014 oh you're
fucking cool hey don't you worry you are full of shit you'll be playing it all this bullshit is
going on five um christ sunderberg from avalanche studios knows why it's happening which avalanche
why uh avalanche studios okay uh yeah avalanche should be that that the names avalanche studios
directly it means just cause guys just yeah okay as opposed to the other avalanche which is not
studios they're avalanche uh but you just said avalanche the first time i said studios he said
studios back both times you were distracted by your losing of the which one not one already so um
what it's not out so the just cause that avalanche studios say triple a games are unprofitable you
can't make a profit on triple a games okay so well so cut your budgets moron the way they're being made
now he's correct now here's the thing he says this keeping in mind that he's working on the mad max
game right which will not which will not at all for a studio of his size plus all his resources
no yeah because you know what brother's owns the license but there's no way they're gonna make
anyone off of this thing but and mad max is really hot with the kids right now but i love that but
it's like you there's no like that you do like i do there's no way that warner is gonna agree to make
a game like this and not make it a triple a type game right so he says doom to failure and everyone
is working on it he knows he hears stuff like Tomb Raider only made a profit like two months ago
after selling like eight million copies in the black but that's the point in the black baby what are
you guys doing with the industry but at the end of the day hey you made a profit who gives a shit
you made it Tomb Raider made a profit because Tomb Raider solid right any triple a title that uses
this metric and is not either pretty good or maybe they just get a lucky bomb like you're super
duper right in the end it made a profit yeah but fucking investors want that profit now last year
yeah they want that profit this now now now now i want a profit right now and you have all the
like no they won't go and now it's it's so bad for him to me because i i know i keep saying this
and you're all probably sick of it look look at what happened with the souls series yeah those
games are made cheap and they sold like crazy because the audience wants it it so lower your
budgets to your audience along well for in this case with avalanche i don't really think it's
their call the budget no not from mad max you know it's very much warner way to give us my faith
in the mad max game remember at e3 there was a giant poster from mad max it wasn't there i
remember i think triple a games are more just more of a crapshoot than death than a failure every
time or whatever he said and the thing is that they know that um if everyone lowers their expectations
the triple a market's going to be prime for the taken from by somebody yeah you just got to get
it out there there are kids there can only be so let's let's say 10 10 to 20 yeah 15 games
that are skyrim call of duty diablo whatever well this year there's a ton already and that's
including japan and and it's and it's various and it's become like a warning triple a what does
that mean anymore it means yakuza and it means jojo and and monster hunter jojo
really it's a it's a handheld game but what they're using ps2 assets but doesn't that shit
like do you know they're investing in we versions of minecraft sell is that truly
woolly triple a ref is referring to the amount of money you put in but the expected sale
exactly sorry sorry all right and it's it's starting to look like the fucking mobile market
that we're just talking about where there are so many of these huge expensive games and only 10
of them can be the one and it starts to get to the point where it starts to be chance except when
you look at call duty wise call duty going to be successful for 10 more years because it has such a
built-in huge audience if i want to make call of duty numbers let's put all let's put 100 million
dollars in to make a game that's like call of duty except oh wait there are 20 games that fit
this profile and ours is the seventh best one and titan falls on the other side so so oh no we lost
all our money a triple a games are profitable disappointing 3.5 million sales really it shouldn't
have to be that no it is because investors and the fucking business has to learn that not everyone
can be ea and activision ea and activision sometimes can't even be ea and activision yeah it's true
it's crazy it's tough though because we're just like you have to everyone wants to be profitable
yeah totally more people want to get into the industry so you need more money to hire those
totally at the very at the very tail end of the 1970s and the start of the 80s there's this thing
called the video game crash where there are so many systems and so many games being released
that's so much that no one made a profit and then not only were there was no tons of them there was
no compliance they were all clones and it was garbage it reminds me very much of the upper
echelon of triple a market and the bottom echelon of the mobile market a bit yeah these like the game
industry is too big now to crash too many people play games and are willing to buy games like i put
it'll fall off these bubbles can totally crash zynga and ea can totally go bankrupt there's dudes
that are kind of in their own little like corner yeah i feel like you can't interrupt that whatever
blizzard is doing they're going to be doing on their own totally yeah and no one with such a huge
fan base is that like yeah or or such a huge like uh moniker for quality yeah like i hate parts about
diablo 3 but it was still polished is all fucking hell at the end of the day don't fuck with your
fans right don't release dungeon keep don't yeah don't release dungeon keep away great so or just
make it 10 bucks and then let them do what they want no but woolly you wouldn't make a bajillion
dollars right away oh no wait we're not making a bajillion dollars because the only thing people
know about our game is that it is a hot steaming pile of theft on the bright side it cost them 40
bucks to make it's it's look at all these five star ratings it is i cannot wait for the triple a
industry to just fucking die for like in a sense for like four or five mega companies let's say capcom
ea um thq like to just die to share and have all of their employees spread out and make smaller
companies making better games at lower costs at lower costs and let's let's let's keep that train
rolling so uh triple a game watchdogs what the fuck we we both confirmed and we not unrecanceled
we made fun of this for being non-news last week and as soon as that podcast and literally right
after it became news again and then also became unnews again and is now news not unrecanceled
the the process of watchdogs's quantum state is so goddamn confusing so i'm just gonna sum up its
current existence i think i think p4r gaming did the best absolutely it exists in a schrodinger's
cat schrodinger's cat if you observe it the results will change according to who and where the
observer is so i'll try and sum this up real fast watchdogs for the we you people keep saying
it's cancelled ubisoft says that's not cancelled then people say ubisoft says it's not cancelled
polygons and then and then ubisoft's response is just we didn't say it wasn't cancelled we just
did not announce that it was not cancelled so then the polygon article changes to say
gamestop says that it was not actually uncanceled in the end because who else said the same thing
we got to point our finger and so finally finally as of i think yesterday there is an official statement
from ubisoft saying we did not cancel it but it may arrive several months after all of the other
which to me says they haven't even started and it also means that that game is cancelled
that game is fucking cancelled but if it does happen better they are going to release that game
on every system that's not the we you just look at the sales look at the we use numbers and then
say we were gonna put it out but there's no one who would know this this is cancelled this is to
me that it's not cancelled it's just it's in trouble and someone is working on a magic build
that has to impress somebody that's the most logical scenario no i agree with you it's a limbo
but my takeaway from that is that it won't and it'll be cancelled either way even if it's uncanceled
there will be no dlc that much is certain god damn it the fucking dlc shit is so bananas yeah
god what is going on man it's all the whole industry is falling apart unless you're at
sony except sony's falling apart and they just split off their fucking tv division no more tv no
more pc yeah well okay pc's from sony well they weren't doing anything i mean well exactly well
yeah if we're gonna go we might as well go in i mean yeah yeah sony taking ridiculous huge losses
5 000 jobs cut uh they're closing down tons of nintendo closing down vio close down all kinds
very literally now to be fair no one is shocked that vio's going away no but the thing is is that
the last time we talked about this on one of the early episodes of the podcast it was the same thing
we knew sony was in trouble except for their video games division and their medical hardware yeah
and insurance those insurance those are the only places yeah life insurance shit like that i never
saw well they it's mostly it's only in fact so i mean to me it's just like yeah the rest of it's
doing shit as is the market they're in general and they're not selling off their tv division
they're making it off they are splitting it and giving it to one of their own subsidiary yeah so
like sony will cut off the limbs as they turn black but the video games are doing fine but
something so like that's why i it's not even really game news because it's like i think it is
because it means that sony's gonna put more eggs into the video game basket which is good for
everyone sure but i mean we're not talking about the fact that sharp lost 4.7 billion what's
syrup's not in the game our samsung lost 9 billion yeah that's money yeah it was huge no i love
samsung but it's like that's that's the ongoing back and forth it belongs you could make a triple
a game with that money the ongoing back and forth between samsung and apple's endless copyright
and trademark battles end up affecting their god damn that's like bottom line it's like crazy it's so
funny um so stupid that has a lot to do with like like galaxy sale of things too as well but
but the point is that like that's a whole other mark that's just absolutely that's so so we start
our tech podcast yeah then then we'll talk about that right like it's it's a different thing entirely
the games department is what you compare with nintendo and the xbox and a lot of people are
talking about sony and i think like in my opinion it's fine playstation's not going nowhere i like
that the rest of the company is dying so that they focus on the i have a direct answer to what
you're gonna say i was gonna say a giant company is not like would like has there been a precedence
we're like well our video game thing is fine can the entire company be supported by just that no
they actually have to just make themselves smaller and smaller smaller just to be a video
like i said they're going to cut off the limbs that don't work like the computers are already on
their way out pretty much and it's just like like something goes bad well let's get rid of it and
until video games go bad they're not going to get rid of it and as a they're not going to get rid of
it exactly and they're not going to have to cut down as long because that division has its own
budget and such so it's you know as the uh total opposite to sony's financial woes there has been
a growing amount of rumors that seem more and more legitimate that high-level investors in
microsoft are are pressuring them cell bing if you will yes cell surface yes dump the entire
games division get rid of it has focused entirely on enterprise software and the guy the the the
the new sea the new sea has gone on record yeah saying that he's actually willing to do that
and i feel like that would be fucking crazy but that's xbox even broken even yet no like they
keep almost breaking even and then something drags the macarons that's nuts don't is how you appease
your investors the the you come out and you say yeah i'm willing to do that thing that you're all
yelling and it's willing to make them shut up for a little while the fucking red rain probably
destroyed all of the xbox's profits up until that point oh the first xbox was literally let's throw
money into this hole in hopes we will see what happens yes and you have to for the first one
you have to totally and the 360 again total like tons of money lost until 2008 when everything
went amazing yeah ten year generation but like i don't think they ended up breaking even over the
360 i like lennon and xbox one they've got so many units built that are unsold they're probably
selling those at a loss right that's that seems likely i i don't think so i think they're selling
that profit with that price at that price that probably i don't like the fact that we're all hazy
about this so let's not say you think you're right you're right you could be super wrong i'd be
surprised who was at a loss yeah considering the hardware it shouldn't be at a fucking loss um
but either way anyway but i mean we're not talking about the fact that windows is doing
shit no you know what i mean like what else now what else that's what microsoft sold their games
like business that would be the fucking crazy sell it to sega who would pick it up sega samson
samson samson no sega because it'd be hilarious sega can't buy it sega it'd be hilarious no well
amazon why would it be amazon it could be amazon or samson those are the only two buyers i can think
of that and then they can just work on killer extinct again why matt because amazon for some
reason bought the developer of not for some reason well for a reason we're still not a hundred percent
and what's that developer's name double healer yeah weird ass news we're over at liam's place
we're over at liam's place and liam goes you'll never guess who just got bought and i'm like uh
and you never guess we never know you said double healer so we go who bought them and then i go
oh that was the guessing game and then i go ea and then really goes nintendo we both excitedly go
nintendo yeah and you're like and you're like no you're like capcom and you're like no and we're
like oh and then i go give us a hint and liam says not video games and i go uh a movie company
and you go no i think one of you said yahoo no i said i said then you said did you give us another
hint it's something pat likes yeah pat doesn't like anything in your games what could it be
and then you give us the answer by saying amazon and we're like amazon.com and it's because they're
working on amazon.com it's been a rumor for a while they're trying to make a little uh micro console
like everyone is now like everyone but they're i'm making one in my room the rumor is they're
making the highest end one uh using the snapdragon it'll probably be stronger than the we you it's
probably going to be just as strong as the we you um they're targeting about three hundred dollars
and the start button will have an amazon button right next to it and apparently they're targeting
the core audience firmly they're not shooting off of that it's apparently their goal and the fact
that they would buy double helix is pretty yeah i don't know like that that's an investment now
supposedly i don't remember who but i they've been buying up smaller people in the interest
and double in games to double helix is the people that got bought and made everyone pay attention to
wait oh wait they're actually they're actually buying fucking games yeah but pat we talked about
this but this makes double helix avoid being closed down after working on strider totally like every
gets closed down and they were gonna have curves yeah but you can't help but go fuck they were
just starting to get good they were they're starting to get interesting and you know hopefully um amazon
will be like okay this is our biggest studio which they probably are likely they clearly can make
action games quite well you let's let them make our core action you get to make the first the first
party uh like act uncharted ripoff called amazonia the warrior princess i think that one's free that
idea is free i think they're gonna give them a pretty like carte blanche thing just like go at it
make a good game and sell consoles but like are they gonna keep all those fighting game people they
brought on board why not they can program maybe but not not the programmers aren't so like not just
programmers i was talking more about like the actual testers that experience very but they
did a lot of hiring did you ever work on a fire fighting game yes well why didn't you leave after
the fighting well there you go you needed money on the table sure but i wasn't hired for a fight
anyway amazon hired all 75 employees but there's always the possibility that those people would
leave to go work for whatever new company microsoft hires to continue making killer instinct and why
wouldn't they leave because they're like oh i like what we're doing now who the fuck knows who's the
fuck knows i wanted them it's super weird i hope they're getting carte blanche to do something cool
microsoft announced that we've we've known about this for a while yeah we have we have a transition
in place and we're gonna announce our new partner and i'm just like oh well at least ninja theory
rare obviously no man no your transition dev is gotta be uh no you don't transition that has
got to be fucking um lab zero lab zero now it's gotta be lab zero killer instinct has been mysteriously
removed from the microsoft or who's the other one who's the other one uh uh iron galaxy uh
interesting enough i just randomly decided to look at the credits of killer angsting and it says
additional programming by mike zamont what yeah i saw that yo call it in the big gun maybe i don't
know we need some guy in here to program the throws how does the throw work yeah chief thunder i got
this yeah so yeah that's all really i did that there's a hidden russian accent mode in which
mike z just does bad russian accents all over nice characters real soviet damage god damn it i love
mike z all right time for a little bit of a kickstarter roundup what's going on kickstarter
a lot is there projects on kickstarter anymore i believe there are a lot of them aren't going
places so yeah first things first before i forget that unsung story kickstarter moving
but medium and i pulled our money because i didn't yet you didn't i put my fucking money
it's not gonna it's gonna barely scrape the limit at possible and i want why would you pull your
money i pulled my money no what do you i'm saying like i i thought you said pull your money together
no i pulled it wait wait it's desperate for every penny you can get because when i look at it i see
i want the version of the game that's halfway up the stretch goal list okay i don't want the base
exactly i want the console one so i pulled it because it's it's maybe uh hope against hope it's
gonna barely crack it it is not i'm not gonna i'm not gonna i'm not gonna pay the amount that i was
gonna pay for that version i'm gonna i'm gonna link i'm gonna link to the i'm gonna link to the
kicktrack instead of the kickstarter so people can see that tragic curve oh yeah like spike into
we're not touching that game that game is tragic because it it had this awesome curve where it was
meteoric at the beginning when people said it's gonna be a matzo no rpg whoo and then uh showing
the game then they came out and said by the way that's not actually working on the game we what
the biggest bummer he gave what he gave them the story and the gameplay design but he's not
actually developer and then matzo came out and said no guys it's gonna be good for real i promise
i i gave these guys the okay and just this constant seesaw that on the kick tracker looks
like a straight fucking line of nothing to me the biggest the biggest thing for a lot of people
was they just stopped you know when everyone thinks matzo no rpgs what do you think i think
file of asia tactics is one of the big things is the art and the visuals and the theme and for
this they showed off that initial art of the environments and people went it looks like
medieval good quality art and then they just didn't show off character like nothing interesting
really yeah and i feel like that was there the big down so sorry guys but they're still
there so if you do want to put money into that then but i wouldn't recommend it no not if you
want a perfectly good pcr i personally would not recommend it well that's sure go for it that's
what i'm saying i'm gonna hold on my fucking ass he actually did it all why are you all the way
up my ass right now yeah don't talk about it just just accept it no no i mean look like well yeah
i know it's not like you're you're you're like you're jerking about the game has slowed
significant oh yeah it hasn't stopped completely slowed to like really slow like slow rock pet
yeah like a one tug per minute but you know what i am jerking about the game kingdom come holy
shit we'll take it away decade looks awesome it's basically just basically want to make a
skyrim the witcher in old-timey medieval thing and it's made by a bunch of x devs from
cd project and uh cd project and oh i was recently corrected i know i just thought
and it looks awesome it looks crazy awesome does it have mod tools i don't remember can you play as
black spider man you can't play as i don't think you can play as black people and that's actually
kind of a huge controversy wow because they're like it takes place in a nine there should
nine kilometer area of one part of like england or something right they said well we looked in
that kind of area didn't really have a lot of black people and people really fucking freaked out
people really freaked out i mean and until the game comes out i don't know but it looks awesome
looks fun but it sure yeah uh that's all i got to say well what else is there kick starting
run back to the microphone there is well actually what's it what's it at right now
oh it it passed it way past it's in pounds like the donation thing is in so that's like
40 dollars uh and it's and it's one of those weird kick starters where it's basically um
we need 500 000 pounds to convince our investor to give us the rest of the money yeah um and which
is why it looks so much better than a game that is worth 500 000 pounds yeah is basically he the
investor has to deal with them where the amount of money this some rich guy will give them budget
will scale with the amount of stuff it'll come yeah it looks really good it's i think it's almost
over but uh check it out and there's also cradle which looks super good yeah yeah we talked about
cradle looks awesome uh something up something popped up uh yesterday uh darkest dungeon what is
uh darkest dungeon that was dark oh yeah monday yesterday and uh man that was just it just you
go look at a couple of the gifts of this thing or the kickstarter page yeah and you just take a
look at it like this looks like some cool shit i i don't know what else to say but a little like
so it's it's an rpg that's very gothic about the pressures of rpgs right and you're you have your
party of four and your guys panic and shit pretty much and like and like the battle screen just
looks really cool i mean it's hard to sort of it's stylish it's stylish but it's a very stylish
presentation your guys react to things they say things as the battle's going on when a game is
stylish at the kickstarter level it makes an impression oh yeah you know what i mean like
like it helps give you faith yeah it does when everything's still kind of basic like that's
par for the course yeah but when like it it's that extra bit of help where you go oh shit someone
had an idea someone had a real idea yeah cool um so you know we'll we'll see where this goes and
whatever but at this point just staring at what they've worked on so far and presented to the world
i'm impressed you know it's kind of like well i keep going back to it but god damn man hyper light
drifter just did everything i was thinking about this yesterday where i went to change one of my
pledges i went to pull out the money from on some story and i said hey all of my games like only one
of them has come out i want to get a good shot of the list of games that i've backed and i looked at
the list in the shovel night and eternity and torment and and uh fucking hyper light drifter
and i'm looking through this list i'm like this is a potential game of the year list yeah for 2014
or 2015 like all of these like kickstart look fantastic it's it's gonna be the best it's
now one or two of those is gonna be a fucking disaster and they're not gonna and they're not
all gonna come out in the same year no sure but it's like i'm looking at the like when you look at
the sum total yeah of like what what is kickstarter going to be it's gonna be fucking awesome it feels
like it 2015 project phoenix and mighty number nine yeah damn those two games it feels like uh
pre-order bills and you're in your wallet yeah except better dream games although except better
because it's not just lining game stop pockets prematurely yeah yeah yeah dude that game stop
will still take your watchdogs will you pre-order of course there's that clip of um that clip uh
from of mighty number nine of inner food they're sitting down to play oh yeah alpha big thumbs
up and he just sits down and the cabin just on him he's like yeah we're pointing out the
lighting is not on this guy whatever business man and he turns around and he says i'm extremely pleased
this is absolutely what i've wanted i like it very much everyone's like oh yeah you know
like things coming along man yeah no everything's gonna be great yeah it look you're just talking
about everything's gonna be shit no like it's gonna be great that's what i was just gonna say is that
looking at kickstarter and you get this really good yeah like happy feeling about video games
which is nice after you look at like the fucking shit that is the current industry i'll tell you
what's not coming along bam what is it to the death and it's a fucking shame is on its way to death
there is nothing going on if you still want to get in on that get in on that little over a week
was really fun little over a week to go and it got to the point where they put out a demo actually
friend was telling me there was a second demo what came up uh i did it i didn't check if it came out
today but i think it was it was a second it was a second demo up today like uh i haven't tried it yet
because i was at work it's no one else if it's like a different slice again i'm gonna go try it
tonight okay but it's very much but it's definitely something that's like let's drum up some interest
get your hands on the actual thing yeah to the death really fun action like schmup slash
thing i watched leon play the first fight yeah i watched leon play the first part of like the
first demo or whatever and it was like yeah there's some stuff here charge your sword as you run as
you run on the ground really awesome but the demo was like really really basic well my computer
runs like shit too so no but it's not really you know it wasn't my issue and you know you little
shades of senkonor on daisms a little bit a little bit yeah and you've got like you've got a dash
and you've got a shield um and they can't all blow up man no and like certain audiences are better
served than others and the key to kickstarter success so far has been find an audience that has
been shit on for like a decade and say we're gonna give you the best thing that you always wanted
and people go fucking crazy and we're gonna do that with a guy that you've been jizzing over for
the last totally years and and when you come to like and this is the saddest thing about the whole
kickstarter game thing is like when it comes to like a brand new idea like that has no homage base
yeah so like it's a lot harder like like shovel knight eternity mighty number nine they're all
like mighty number nine eternity and torment and i think of one where it's like hey you remember
that shit the shit they haven't made for real in a decade you want someone to get it right you want
to do you want it to come back the genre you thought was dead your hair so that's what you're
doing you're buying the spiritual successor yeah you know and someone that comes along with a new
thing yeah to the death even though it's got some big names behind it their names that aren't not
household names they're dudes that are like yeah we're gonna go to war yeah we're not all duty perfectly
talented individuals they're not karmak they're not in a food they're not chris at alone etc yeah
no it's it's a shame but it's still up if you want to go back that because it's fun game and you
can try it needs all the help it can get um and lastly we got lamalana too which we got to bring up
because uh we got specifically targeted mail we've been hassled for this one by a specific guy
and i feel terrible for forgetting it because it's such a fucking cool game um matt you would
like this the oh i i have the original yeah you get to play as an american the protagonist is now
like a blonde buxom americanica it's pretty good she's really good love a lot of one never clicked
with me i don't know what it was maybe you don't like video games it's no but like it was so it is the
purest video game it was sold to me as the purest video game as indiana jones it's got like
like dark souls s like brutal like difficulty elements to it and exploration but with a
and i'm like this sounds exactly what i'm into and i played it and it's just something about it
that's just i i get what you mean it's just not there because i like the video version like i get
what you mean i i liked it but there was something off a little about i don't i couldn't describe it
what i think i think it's like the baby range on the whip like i think that's all it is like the
same reason why i should love beautiful joe but don't like beautiful joe because of the baby punches
like i want a castlevania whip so one on one circumvents that by making giant glowy absolutely
absolutely having your fist be like five times the size of your character okay the bigger the
fist the better the game uh there's one more like a not Kickstarter but i wanted to mention uh
does anyone that's a giant finger it's different off your ass um does anyone remember everyone
heard that there's no like under your breath with oh i said the loud part quiet the quiet part
left um the loud part lion no the loud part quiet and the quiet part loud does anyone remember um
about tech 3001 i do yeah it is what i mean i think mine i'm not sure pat but the best
xbox live indian the only one that that comes close that i find super amazing wagon adventure
sure um i made a game with zombies and it was pretty good too sure sure not your friends
not your friends but tech 3001 felt like wow video game temple of the i'm gonna say dust
but that has been spinning its wheels forever on steam green light uh green light and i was
contacted by the developers who were really happy because when me and pat talked about oh my god
this is so good they're they're sales spiked up but they're sales spiked up enough for them to get
on steam green light so if anyone wants to check that out and vote for it because i highly recommend
playing the xbla version and if you want to vote for on steam green light x blig x blig xbox live
indy version and you want to vote for that on steam green light please do because those guys
could get some help because i thought that game was fantastic and they're really nice and courteous
they're really phoenix studios what a great name good name it reminds me of like audio surf
mixed with visually yeah totally mixed with a couple of things but it's really cool it reminds
me of a star fast i can put my arm back on you can so please say fucking a star love him so creepy
it's really creepy uh holy shit speaking of childhood cartoon commercial icons did you hear
about fucking mcgruff the dog yeah what happened to mcgruff the calling so what was his shtick
what was his thing mcgruff the crime dog what did he say uh only cash phrase only you can take a bite
out of crime by out of crime now the actor who played mcgruff the crime dog was recently picked up
as they found over a thousand pot plants in his house alongside dozens of weapons including
assault rifles and grenade launchers he was going to have a one-man war against crime i'm sure
that's the real this is the most disillusioning sht ever ever that's like smoky the bear just
lighting everything on fire no that's like finding out that the voice actor that played
optimus prime was stealing energy sources from around the world well fuck man just fucking so
weird yeah i thought it was a joke so if you take too many bites out of crime apparently you learn
to enjoy the day you either die here or live long enough to become the villain where's our
fatter of mcgruff going to war man i'll actually still have plenty of time to make some okay so
i'm a big fan of the evolving headline throughout the week as we covered yeah we'll sleep uh watch
dogs fluffy bird right and flappy bird just like you write it down at the beginning of the week
exactly you have to keep going back and it becomes a non-story and then it becomes a bigger story
that's what happens to me anytime i go back to it i'm re-editing it and this was one uh the third
one this week japanese Beethoven death comes out to not be deaf or a composer he's not deaf he's
not deaf this he's been faking deafness also he turns out to not be deaf or a composer at all
so here's here's the background this is the guy who was credited as composing most of the
resident evil early resident evil and onamusha soundtracks and lots of other big which are all
godlike they're they're amazing and the excuse that they gave for the resident evil director's cut
soundtrack being so bad in places is that he was going fucking deaf and then he got better and he's
he learned how to use perfect pitch and he could still compose just like Beethoven did when he was
right so he was like considered the japanese Beethoven because he's fully composing and doing
all of his work and everything this great stuff yeah and he's and he can't hear it whatever and it
turns out that one he's been getting this other guy for the last huge fraud ten years ghost writer
go to ghost write his music exactly and the guy basically just came out and went like yeah
i i can't anymore it's been too long it's been too long and well could you imagine the weight of that
after a while unless you're a dirtbag because no because um what got credited recently he got credited
for something yeah yeah the olympics yeah the olympics was going to credit him for this treasure
music that'll do it and the guy was like fuck it it's i don't care it's too much the olympics what
and then so then this comes out big stank controversy you know uh dudes the evil one is
ruined he's like i'm sorry yes it's true he's helped me over the years and then the the original
guy the ghost writer comes out and goes furthermore he's not even deaf sometimes when i talk to him
he pretended to not hear me but then after a while he gave up the gimmick and this would totally listen
what i heal and have normal conversations this is a goddamn national scandal unbelievable this is
outrageous oh i feel like how do you not get fucking found out for being not deaf for like
20 years how does that happen he was a music school teacher maybe he's not the japanese Beethoven
but he's like the japanese tom cruise and then exactly actor like seriously how how pro is this guy
that not a single goddamn time with people around and someone go hey guy and have him turn around
like yeah actually sorry my mistake he was not the teacher it was this music school teacher that
was the ghost right ah yes but fucking still like yeah jeez mamoru samurai gochi so i remember
i was talking to woolly and we just talked about this guy woolly like yeah that's fucking
retarded or whatever and then i read did you know he's also not deaf and you were like what
that blew your mind the plot thickens man that is that is nonsensical yeah that is just
fucking ridiculous yeah no the ghost writer uh nigaki was paid 77 thousand dollars over two
decades that's probably the worst part about it that dude got fucking ripped off for 20 pieces of
music like a single piece of the resonant old music with all its attendant royalties concerts and
whatnot is probably worth more than that yeah like the resume that's the main theme or some
shit no it's probably worth like twice that's a meme of the tofu yeah for a meager annual salary
at bullshit um scandal scandal controversy and how does no one catch that that's like well abc news
caught it i know but it's it's crazy it's like no one's no one it takes no one to check to see he was
actually doing his job well the whole time okay let's let's speculate and bullshit but but it's
probably like likely what happened is a whole bunch of people and everyone he worked with new and
everyone just shut the fuck up there was no way he composed in studio i much yeah i'm much for
submitted mp3 i much for for the idea that he submits stuff he came down to the office and
everyone just looked the other way and they just you know they got my kami you know they're not his
business man now shut up though he gets to dissociate with him years later that's why he's
understand no please understand i don't want to make music it's hard now he's making now he's making
the music for cycle break did you guys know that make oh you serious no no no no no no did you guys
know that writing music is really hard how is it sometimes it's hard like i mean in my defense it's
really hard that'd be so great if at the end of the press release it just has that quotation
part please understand it's very difficult uh fucking left behind is coming out soon yeah
looks awesome can't wait for that jog my memory i know what left the last of us they'll see oh of
course yes of course i thought it was a game we should probably do something maybe we'll see
if it doesn't get farmed um i should probably do something so there was yeah so there was um nobody
listen to our conversations it was really quiet it was very private there was an interview that
was done uh this week and they're you know they're coming out with some who's the playable character
in that is it ellie or riley you're playing as ellie i kind of want to play as the black girl
yeah well yeah you got a little bit ellie before you get some more ellie now i know but you did
never get to play as black people but wouldn't it be weird to switch characters
no but ellie's always the sidekick so it totally works yeah i guess it's not when she's the main
character though you didn't get your fill with lee of black people no i don't know there needs to be
i don't know what you don't want there to be black people in video games no i know the narrative
is better with ellie being the playable character okay yeah whatever uh but they came out i thought
you liked the wire i do like the wire well i guess i guess you made black people then what what
damn uh so what they came out okay let's just talk about racism let's solve the problem right here
right now i'm doing it tonight this is it'll by tonight it'll be over what was the next stall
take down the back down let me present exhibit a the black ranger we'll start right there now
um that was the weirdest black history post i've ever seen in my life it was awesome i posted i put
a picture on my wall of all the black rangers in the forever red style get together and it was just
like black history month let's get it they're not even black they're much white guys major guys except
for the one black ranger there's one one black ranger that's too easy and then the other black
guy became the red ranger so whatever don't don't forget beetle borgs the black kid had to wear
black armor as well of course it's too easy that beetle borgs it's way too easy yeah anyway uh they
came out and they they finally sort of clarified because i didn't know where this was at but they
said yes left behind is what they made instead of doing a chapter about ish so uh ish was actually
when they hinted at it and all that stuff it was because it was totally still on the table
and what they realized was that um no matter what they did one like it's just not as it's hard to
live up to a myth it's the myth in everyone's heads and no matter how you design the character what
age you put him as whatever you do it's going to be wrong for somebody and we didn't want to ruin
and people like that ellie chick apparently yeah so they're like we we didn't want to detract from
what was established as you know awesome an awesome experience of people's heads already uh further
more they even had a little thing with like we even had a little ish letter that you found
in left behind but they took it out because they said oh you know what it was a little nice like
fan service for people but it was too impractical to believe you'd encounter this ish should join
the ranks of mythic figures along with people like chicago ted if anyone remembers that character
from left for dead and what's his what's his from lord of the rings uh bomb dill tom bomb yeah sure
just like this character he is the hereabouts and you assume is awesome like i remember left for
dead it's like you'd find all over walls in the same house like no one can stop chicago ted
it was like all over the place and there'd be little things like ostrich on chicago ted's coming
through it's like what the fuck is chicago ted it's like it's better that we don't know there's no
way you can do them justice right yeah you can't um no so that's that's exactly it um now refresh my
memory are they doing another single player dlc after this no that's just the fuck the multiplayer
is really good so i don't i don't blame them for actually putting resources but like the single
player single player is like a fine wine and multiplayer is like paps and they were so go read
this dude they were so nervous about any single player content of course because you make it
imperfect they're like anything they were they basically like when blast of us turned out to
be awesome like they had this kind of like smug like hell yeah we know we did it but afterwards
they're like oh my god we pulled it off yeah that's that's a really bad analogy because i'd way
rather drink paps than any wine fucking wine is a matter of taste there's a time literally a
matter of taste exactly there's a time and place for both and and that i would i would also say
just like that multiplayer is way better than a paps it's really good like like it is like
an analogy like you said that one time like you hope you see a case of paps so you boot up the game
you're like all right let's see where this night's going let's see where i end up yeah no but what's
going on in here you dumb college kids but yeah it's a shame but i have high hopes for this and i
totally understand after hearing how like touch and go they were like with this they're like uh
we almost didn't want to put too much and whatever that being said it's not like the single player
of last of us is wanting for content no i mean it's huge you know not at all just i'd love more
but there's a demand for it and they well you'll get more when the fucking sequel comes out well
we'll get to that in a second um they played the ps4 version of that ever happened absolutely
and they should have just said also we've improved our tech and we want to show off some new tricks
that would be a really easy way for you to improve your tech fucking put it on your ps4 you know
the faction-based combat faction factions at the same time yes can't wait for that you the the enemy
humans and a bunch of clickers are in the same area in the same area at the same time yeah great
guess what you throw a bottle at the other humans what happens the whole the clickers
want to eat the other humans awesome because that'll be a nice preview of it remember it on
charted three and no i'm playing on charted three oh no i know where you're going on charted three
very early on has a sequence in which you fight in a bar and the bar fight has a lot of contextually
appropriate uh sequences in which i'm close to a bottle i'm close to the the counter was the best
one and i'm close to a fridge and then you would get these context sensitive like violence yeah
and that got turned into the punch laser system that is used in last of us to turn that turn
it violent yeah go holy shit yeah and so what i'm hearing here is that this new tech for this
could possibly be used in a much larger grander form yeah for any possible future technology
using this setting so uh yeah and i don't know i used to test drive a percentage starlight um also
some tricks they've learned are like basic visual things too that trailer showed off i want a god
damn sequel right now that's what i'm trying to show off today now now shadows of particles on the
window god is high on ps4 at least face that's how is that not on ps4 nuts there's no time the
naughty dog are wizards it's going to be too much time it's crazy naughty dog versus koji pro in
wizardry go i wish they'd team up uh i also wish this and uh yeah i think they closed that uh that
whole little segment out by talking about how in the future they're thinking of of course they're
thinking about sequels and things like that of course but they're also making sure that they're
thinking about new ip's because a lot of ideas are going getting thrown around internally and um
again revisiting that story is something that not everyone feels is necessary sure but i think that
there are the world is big and last of us i you could put it anywhere and think of a totally
different story i think they can make it work i think i fall into the camp that like if they do
make that sequel and just go we gotta go and ellie are in that game fuck that game well that's what i
mean yeah if we decide to cash in and then they go for that approach then yeah fuck it but i'd much
rather just brand new my p yeah you know what i mean sure and at the same time there's all the
sacrifices that comes with that where you have to make the goddamn game of the year to sell
three or four million units on a new ip which they did and if they can't make the goddamn
cash in on the name we'll make like an abstract a third time yeah well even uncharted the first
one didn't like the first one was no last of us no exactly but now when they made a great game it's
still not good like they have no fucking work uncharted two was the game but now that they have
the formula and they just cook the cauldron that's not true though because you just end up with a clone
well yeah no not identical but they know how to make the good game and they know what of course
what the requirements are for making voice acting and writing and you know my piece are always dodgy
like that that's one of the problems with them unfortunately unfortunately i wish it was easy
but i just in an ideal world i would like that instead of me too no me too i you know what i'm
gonna discreet because i really like i i'm always clamoring for we just want to see what's happening
on the other side of the i don't care about what's happening i like how the game is a mix between
resident evil four style combat melee violence and scrounging i really like that that formula
oh i want it so visceral so if you made a new ip and you use that exact template fine but i want
to scrounge for garbage that i make into gun i know more scissors and you need to practice
oh yeah fuck off so you're so specifically you want to hold on to that post apocalyptic
i want to the gameplay system i want the gameplay loop or or sneaking and violence and then i don't
have a moment it's a fucking mainstream survival horror game for fuck's sake and it worked and it
worked and it was good so yeah i want another mainstream survival horror game i want survival
horror to become super popular again i want evil within to blow up and i want last of us to usher
in a new era of survival horror because it's awesome i don't see where it goes but not in the same vein
where capcom says we're just gonna make last of us yeah well which is gonna happen granted it'll be
interesting to see what they do because they know they fucked up it'd be interesting but i don't have
exactly it'll be interesting so let's just just just fucking outsource resieval seven of platinum
now now yes it's already two and the county doesn't work coming to the world of platinum
oh uh camea oh yeah camea i make me i'm just under you mean tango i get camea i got me confused
sometimes in my dreams that the same person didn't see just don't don't do that just under two hours
and we almost got through a podcast without mentioning platinum oh dammit i saw some guy in
the reddit be like man i love the super best friends but sometimes they go on and on about
platinum i don't think vanquish is that good and i couldn't stop myself just one man shut the fuck up
vanquish is awesome um speaking of ushering in new ages i can't stop sonic boom sonic boom sonic
whoop whoop they use the goddamn song that kids on youtube use to make fun of those trailers
unironically no i couldn't it was ironically you know i can't believe it it is the goddamn
same dubstep song that people use for like farmer pro and shit like that they probably got skrillex
it's literally skrillex i know but i know and and my whole thing is just like if you got you know
you're gonna get him because they know who they want to appeal to and all that jazz whatever yeah
why not get skrillex to remix the sonic boom song oh yeah it's fucking expensive that's really
expensive how much the skrillex cost i know right well don't get actual skrillex just get another
webstep artist yeah then get the skrillex no get a get a dubstep artist like there's like
a hundred thousand of them in the year i love higher 40 independent dubstep artists to make a song
and only use one of them and remix sonic boom contest uh the winner actually in the trailer
save our trailer from disaster speaking of naughty dog yeah boom yeah is the new cartoon
the new generation of sonic i guess and it's an effort that's oh sorry sorry alternate
alternate universe sure alternate universe for sonic but here's the thing it's being made
and only made for the west well by westerners they're not by listeners including x naughty dog
red button studio and big red button and senzaru is making the 3ds one now senzaru
made i i just made slide four yes slide four that was it which was totally solid which i have
actually so this might not grace the shores of japan and then they have gone on record saying the
japan's gonna keep making their own sonic sonic games awesome sonic games like they've had for the
last two decades so you know what why not yeah you're right why not i'll tell you we have to lose
i we have to lose knuckles because he looks like god damn shit okay all right so like so yeah let's
let's oh my god let's get into it because knuckles fucking sonic's blue arms what the hell has been
straight up turned into drake into spaghetti more like is turned into nathan drake from
because that fucking sand scarf thing he's always got a scarf now well i read that the
developers were like we want to you know make them different we want to make them look more rough
and tumble and they've got runners tape on their like sonic looks fine tails looks fine
link has a scarf amy looks like god damn shit but fuck amy i find amy looked awesome it's fine
yeah fuck amy i don't care better than usually i don't have any real complaints about all of them
except for knuckles and the thing with knuckles looks like but here's the thing about it the concept
of making him bigger stronger buffer because he's supposed to be a stronger god sure makes sense
yeah right making him identical in stature to sonic is silly yeah but the proportions they
decided to draw are ridiculous are awful my interpretation of knuckles is always he was a
better fighter but he's clearly stronger like he sure but and he had the big this the knuckles
represent but almost but it's not ken and ryu you know it's this guy can do more
physically sure but he's not as fast but my interpretation was she was better at it yeah
well like every character their whole thing is like sonic is shocked the fastest one
amy has the most agility and she's but she's but the hammer and a hammer which is really
worth to use yeah for a hammer i quite like that tails uses gadgets and he can fucking fly
and knuckles is a brawler so that makes sense but like i was saying all of you at some point is
i like knuckles body would look fine if they changed his head a little bit but his head looks exactly
like knuckles his old head yeah that's why he looks all fucked up i think don't change the head
just shrink him down a little bit a little bit make him make him like two thirds the size he is
now and like even out his proportions a little bit and make him not look like god damn shit i
love to see all the concept work for knuckles oh yeah i bet you there's like i bet half of it is
really good now they're like well let take the one that says bullshit on it but that though also
i think these were designed by the the cartoon studio that's what i was about to say that's what
i was about to say you have to you have to understand that when you're redesigning because
the cartoon is the main thing when you're designing characters for a cartoon making people
way different from each other is their motives up randy that's how to do a cartoon so the cartoon
runs yeah granted the cartoon looks good sonic team ruin sonic i mean like like if dammit you
look at team titan cyborg has to be huge that's what needs to be small yeah did you guys see the
sonic boom preview for the cartoon by the way i did it looks entertaining just as good as i'm not a
huge fan of shows coming out of france except for wack food like there's always a certain aesthetic
or a certain like there's a there's an awful cg iron man cartoon that was farmed out to a french
anime which is awful i hated it the important the important thing is that sega realized that they
were running nighthood cyber six oh god he's gonna go and that's it thank you for that point and
that being said when you first see that trailer i'm like okay looks fine and when all four of them
are running i was like well that i'm getting high for something and you see the four lines you go oh
my god four player co-op that might be awesome and i'm hoping that that delivers my my only problem
seems like it's only two players though no online well it's still four players well i said only two
players locally my biggest problem okay but it has four player co-op but there's no online and they
said only two players i don't know i read four players sorry did they specifically wrote that
was it go nintendo sorry it was not did they specifically came out and said two players
they said two players locally and they said no online and when you kind of put those together
okay when you put two and zero together you get two so that's a shame then because when i saw those
again i just saw the four lines of color and i was like i really hope that means four player
four players too messy i think the yeah but that on a stage with paths where you all intersect and
leave that's too bad be amazing i don't know man the the i want to like it i really want to like
it but the fact that it immediately jumped to stage two of the sonic cycle of friends are there
because amy's there so when when are we gonna get to stage three where big the cat is the guy who
drives your fucking car but nothing nothing from the gameplay perspective has been particularly
awful so far for me i'm giving them the ultimate benefit of the doubt because they're a new
never touched sonic this is like this is not having touched sonic is probably the best thing
about this in fact you can you can put a little bit more faith even because they showed off just
the stages to this over a year ago right yeah when they when they had um some sort of there was a
crying engine three sizzle reel about here the developers are currently using our engine and
they showed the stages without the characters so it's like it's not going to jump up any excitement
but this means that they've been working on it for not six months sure i just hope that in the
beginning of the game that the crux of the called with venture is oh no someone decapitated big the
cat i would also not mind that we have to find that murderer yeah i just want to say also how
excited i am for the 3ds one because they confirmed it's going to be like adventure
instruction sure which i'm really down with the cat oh my god yep yep that being said they picked
four if they have to pick four people yeah that's to be four then yeah okay yeah what dlc
character would you guys add blaze the cat rouge blaze the cat blaze the fucking cat i kind of
want bunny rabbit to be in a game finally but yeah blaze the cat blaze that shit blaze the cat is
the only choice because the cat played like a god i like that it was amazing i like vector or charming
the b no fucking crocodile with a boom box there are no suggestions what about what about cream and
cheese oh fuck you people no it's a great names anyways what about silk what about the fucking dark
hedgehog with the fuck's his name so it turns out silver no the evil evil one shut up about this
character you can't remember i know but you can't remember it's fucking any lips shut up about this
fucking character they need to shut up i'm going to fight you no it's sonic i'll fight you okay let's
fight do you need to know what character he's talking about no what do i know there's some comic
character oh my god that's more hardcore than shadow and silver if you need to stop talking about the
comics because then liam's going to describe that time that the tails and sonic fought it was epic
and tails won holy shit fuck sonic watch big red button become actual sonic team and then sonic
team becomes shadow team for real oh man that'd be great dark future i hope big red button makes
shadow the hedgehog too and makes it good what what could you imagine that fully you're saying
something i was saying basically just an uncharted rescan i was saying really quickly but awesome news
nonetheless twitch tv got so fucking huge that their label has now taken over justin tv their
parent company they've fallen out of the internet that's ridiculous so justin tv still existed
and twitch was just their gaming section and twitch got fucking massive and it was such a huge
success that now justin tv is just twitch good for apparently justin still exists as a label
within them like that makes content of its own but okay but twitch is the game like streaming
company yeah and there is a section for non-gaming called justin tv it is like twitch was the arm
and the arm got so beefy that it just swallowed the entire ball put another big beefy arm on there
well yeah now it's just a big flopping arm and like down there is like this tiny like vestigial
body but somehow it's working better than ever between them it's so beefy between between them
in use they made the genius like idea of like having a giant games developed game devoted
section yeah calling in the right guys from mlg to run it and having it pay the streamers now just
fix that massive lag and we'll be good no that's not gonna go i hate it it's not gonna go away
it cuts down on costs enormous oh i'm aware video processing i'm aware but i was using it the other
day and that was terrible you know what it sucks but it's never gonna go away yeah uh as we as we
roll on into our little things liam you want to talk about the liberal word of the use exclusive
liberal use of the word exclusive this is again this is a little bit old but i just i just saw it
today no it's a tweet this is a bit old it was a tweet that microsoft put out um i don't remember
but uh i dredged it up and basically microsoft tweeted out uh minecraft exclusively on xbox
one and someone said no that's not true check your sources that's clearly not true and then
microsoft the twitter they said it's even on your own prior console they said the xbox one
edition is exclusive to xbox one yeah that's amazing at least and the things these two were retweeted
by kassar i the worst thing about it is they're right because it's it is called minecraft xbox
one edition sure but it's fucking bullshit don't just say minecraft exclusive you think that's
weird there's a couple ps4 boxes out there right now beef that they say only on playstation right
next to the xbox one versions of the same fucking game in the lego movie right yeah i don't know like
some misprint on the ps4 versions exclusive to ps4 whoever's looking at the box art should have
caught that well again again like the word exclusive liberal use these days doesn't run it around well
because exclusive doesn't mean anything anymore if nothing's exclusive the version for the console
is exclusive to the console like nobody's gonna put console exclusive on a fucking box like it's
not gonna say lego movie the game for the ps4 exclusively on we you like that's only on xbox
only on xbox just because it's a little thing did you see them capcom's like fiscal report they still
can't spell reveration reveration reveration there's a whole new way to misspell revelation i like it a
lot there's reveration i know i love revelation god dad i like reveration capcom is the best i
remember yeah capcom is the worst by far because it's their own goddamn company's name in the middle
of your name and it's big huge label right in the middle of the the battle and what the fuck was it
called uh whatever the what's the game called our battalion trailer yeah like god i remember capcom
being asked about that afterwards like why can't anyone at your company spell it's like he's a very
complicated problem we have uh we have talked about it internally and we're moving to fix it
and yet snk with all their horrible english never fucked up their own name yeah yeah yeah it's hard
to win it's only three letters frankly you can fuck it up um nks yeah there you go fuck italian
pre-order condoms smk matt sorry italian pre-order condoms go take the story how do you feel about
italian pre-order condoms i feel great write the story do they glow in the dark woolly they don't
glow in the dark they totally do do they glow in the dark why do they not glow in the dark and there's
two so you can have dick fights oh you're totally right they do using your dick this you don't want
to take this one i never heard of this you guys know what he's talking about i don't know what he's talking
game it's for oh it's for a game yeah in italy if you pre-order second son you get to the side
did hear about this i'm sorry you don't have a son well i'm pretty sure you sent me the article i did
not okay i sent it to you my mistake you get to glow in the dark condoms from your game stop italia
on the condom is it say second son so the girl knows that it's coming out so you are literally
crackling with sexual energy right now in this game yeah and then you gotta use your powers no
shit that's from italy like holy crap why are else in the world but i want to see like everything else
like this newsworthy i want to see all the other fucked up pre-order bonuses from other countries
no you know what i want to see i want to see a fucking video feed of the italian launch party
yeah right in the mid seconds for everyone in the right link glow in the dark condoms out onto a bunch
what he do in japan if you pre-order re4 ad hd for the pc you get like a little leon coat for your dick
there you go when i was when i was in japan when i was in japan i was walking around a game store
and you're gonna does that exist already they weren't no they were handing out like little like
flyers and stuff and it was like you know tissues or a customary thing to give out in japan yeah
and it's a tissue thing and i open it so i'm like i need a tissue and i noticed the ad is for an
erotic game that unfolds into a naked anime girl and i'm like oh and they gave me tissues wipe your
face and i'm like fuck is this marketing good or terrible i don't know it's pretty good blow your
snot into her oh that's what they want it's the new level that's vile that's gross snot princess
okay no we need to move on snot he made we need to move on we need to make this is the best joke
hey smegma princess exactly smegma princess yeah now we're talking you couldn't get into smegma
princess you can't get into snot princess no because you're uncultured but you're
uncultured no one can get into smegma princess
more that's the whole point anyway god damn it this podcast is terrible what are we doing with
our fucking lives is better try to figure it out i can't like anyone who's listening to this right
now i think about think about what you're doing right now you tune in it's like hey i hope the guys
talk about smegma man against i didn't get enough i didn't get enough last at least one of you out
there is like man i can't wait to fucking draw a picture of smegma man or two or three god damn it
there's the weird i was still thinking about grapple man i love grapple when's that game coming
never uh double helix is gonna make it for amazon pick in the day from sakurai oh yeah
smash brothers you get this bit you get a little screenshot so we haven't covered this before but
sakurai puts out a picture every day for smash bros yes just to talk about whatever stuff and
there's a picture of an intent dog staring at a tv screen oh in the background to the stages
and the dog's looking pretty bored and sakurai just says a bored looking dog staring at the tv
occasionally super smash brother series makes me really confused about what i'm creating
oh i love how he owns that issue funny dude he gets into the work one day and he's like wait
that's you know what i can i can describe and then did he mix it in by mistake i know the exact
moment that that happens to him and it's one he has to like rub his hands because there are sore
because he has just finished playing like one-handed matches against himself right and like he's in
the process and going like oh my god what am i doing with my life oh like what what is this
how did it want to treat me into this again i'm here oh god oh no they pulled a dump truck of money
up to my house i'm not finished i'm i'm i'm still alive i thought i had died but i'm actually here
developing an anticipated game he's eternally youthful as long as he keeps working on smash
the moment he stops smash is his is his portrait of dorian gray i was gonna say smash development
is a Lazarus pit there you go whichever uh marvel sold a hundred thousand copies in the last three
months before marvel three well you're gonna say by the way i'm going to assume you're talking about
ultimate marvel when i say marvel everyone knows what i mean you read comics like you could be talking
about comic woolly's marvel okay ultimate marvel versus capcom three yeah i bought a fucking everyone
did people that don't fucking know what fighting games are at the office bought when you tell people
this is going to go away and if you want it you need to buy it right now yeah people are gonna
buy everyone went the fuck out and got their copies and jill and shuma goreff must have done
killing gangbusters numbers i also bought shuma goreff and all the costumes yeah pop it in yet
no all right moving along no i popped it into like uh does it work this is the game not broken great
okay and i tossed it back out the window back in the shelf yep back in the stacks how's the yakuza
by the way i forgot to ask um any good shut up i want to know shut up uh evo lineup announced
yes killer instinct on the main stage as it would be right when when microsoft is the new standard
for evo and smash being considered as a normal um possible stage contender as well not without
like not with any sort of gimmick uh thing or like um providing approval by nintendo yeah of course
if there's no it would be it would be a pr disaster if they didn't because after some
convincing they did last year because after all nintendo supports breast cancer is basically
nintendo nintendo enforcing like it's so unfair but it's so true that's probably the worst headline
ever right yeah blank when you are the blank loves cancer yeah like loves it so fucked up man
you want to take this away and destroy it like uh yeah they had to and hopefully there's no there's
no smash mother shenanigans this time around but they might get back in there onto the main stage
i'm sure i'm sure if there's no a nintendo based mash shenanigans that the smash community will
find new ways to create more shenanigans if nintendo were fucking smart they would not only
allow the melee tournament but before top eight they would run a new trailer for the news match
shut up stop making sense if that is rational and thoughtful yeah even if it's an old trailer let's
hear what that's even if it's cranky call yeah when it's gotta be new like debut if i was smart
debut a character that's all they have sacrifice show up and then show off like it makes no sense
not show up to evo but he did show off the smash brothers for we you in the roundy three remember
he just showed all these new mechanics or whatever but showing up to evo and or showing a trailer
means that you support the fighting game community so which they just last year tried not to do
that's why they should do it no they didn't do it because of that no but i'm saying they pulled
smash brothers out of the thing and they've never wanted smash as a part of the fighting
no but they did but last year they did not do that because they didn't want to support fighting
games they just didn't want people streaming stuff because of their yes sure but they've never
wanted smash so if they were solely with only with everything no they're never straight outside
we don't want melee no but from the get go the whole item system party engine type thing
yes but they don't actually they clearly don't like it as they you've talked to the sakurai
oh no you're you're totally right it's the sakurai has been very publicly out of scope
no we only they're tripping into the game because that's why i say brawl they never said anything
new to say nintendo doesn't support this you can't add to well well but yeah you know what
it's so right all the fighting game support they've put into every smash game prior to this one all
the fighting game support they put into melee and into 64 clearly shows liam it's not that the lack
of support the lack of support isn't a dislike or a desire to not support liam you're you're making
things fairly and there really is in interviews sakurai has said very clearly and publicly that
he does not want smash to be a fighting game and part of the fighting and sakurai is not nintendo
nobody is smash brothers from day one from day one from brawl if i'm gonna say they that i'm gonna
say from the original when i say they i'm gonna say the guys who make smash brothers important guy
being sakurai who does not want it it's very clear if they give a shit about fighters at all they
would have made the slightest gesture towards the scene or anything they did last year when they allowed
after trying to pull it when everyone had a shit storm but then they still did it but that's not
a lot that's not support that would be absolutely no support matt matt me stealing your apple and then
giving you your apple bag it wasn't stealing it wasn't like stealing it does not mean that i love you
having apples it's so like i'm trying to make an analogy here it's not the best they very clearly
aren't into this idea and somehow that's turning into no because they haven't said that they're not
therefore they clearly this is all moot though because none of these things we're talking about
are going to happen no they might because it happened last year anyway what happened they allowed
smash but then after disallow no i don't mean allowing smash isn't gonna happen i mean like
them actually doing anything like sending a trailer that's highly that's not gonna happen no
we're not time okay but the gulf between support and begrudgingly choosing to do something after
the fans demand it with pitchforks is huge right but there's no companies the word support versus
being forced into something but there are still companies that say no and final and nothing
they're dirt bags so we're just saying that they're really precedent but when i say the word
support yeah don't equate that with oh they allowed it yeah but you know when you also say
nintendo doesn't support something don't just anthropomorphize a company like that but when
it's just the marketing division liam hold on like i said they the guys making smash brothers
sacri clearly there there is why i didn't have any say guys let's all calm down there's clearly a
linguistic problem here okay there is a difference between i like something i dislike something and i
don't like something okay we are all arguing different terms woolly is only saying that they
don't like it not that they dislike it do you understand the the the difference here i understand
indifference is not support and it is also not like hatred i know i get that but is we are just
arguing for indifference not dislike that that wasn't the implication i got from that that's
the whole point i'm making is that we are all getting super mad about implications when none of us
actually have points that argue with one another nintendo or an sacri at everyone behind smash
brothers have never made a move to support the fighting game community that is an incredibly
broad thing to say guess what i just said everyone behind smash so they haven't made moves to support
the scene except last year i just said support does not equal allowing but allowing after people
bring pitchforks to your door it doesn't equal support it is that means letting it go no it is
on the start it brings them back to zero like like if you want to start because now they've
announced that we're working with nintendo so if you want to say if you want to say something like
they've made a move or some sort of interaction has occurred sure but support means you are in
there supporting doing a thing to help it could lead to support but they haven't supported it but
they have yet to do so so when i say when i say they haven't done it it means they have yet to do
say they don't want to i said i don't know that the last sentence i said was it has not occurred
but that was your opening thing because the other games added to the evil list because we're running
in circles whatever dive kick no it's uh blaze blue which is the second time it's ever been added
to you the grotto fantasms the last one i guess it's the shot to see this will be this will be the
last one exactly and sadly injustice was also added what are you serious it's gonna be around for a
fuck that yeah it's just that last year everyone was like it's it was the worst
no one like did that kick out persona for arena no but um but uh what you're gonna call it uh
nether realm is always gonna have an entry no more combat this year but injustice so no matter
how shitty the games are they get an entry because they're big no it's because it's it's a type of
fighter and there's a group that follows that that's true anime fighters are a thing it's the
mortal combat i guess you know there's the mk fighter there's the hyper fighter i just i just
look at that and you're like it probably pushed out a game that deserve to be there more yeah it's
like skull girl like like i mean like it or not like the fighting game community is divided it is
and uh between good games and bad and there will always be like the one contender that represents
this community and as long as they have that represented that's eva during the announcement
i think it was tony canon i can't remember who was speaking at the time but he was saying
the reason why injustice is there is because nether realm just put out a huge patch that
really addresses all our issues with the game in terms of balance so they're clearly supporting
the game and we want to like that was his reason and for it and i was like okay but last year everyone
like hated it so i don't know why you're giving in a second shot when like pat just said there
could have been something else the attorney numbers have been decent they have been decent
they've they've they've dropped but last year they were decent okay um boo injustice
what a fucking injustice your weekly facepalm challenge everybody i always lose these see if
you can make it all the way through the heavenly sword movie trailer i don't even know this was
a video because i was like nobody can see me watching this try to make it through
it's a shame because ninja theory could have made a better movie uh ninja theory could have made
a better that's not hard to believe uh i haven't even seen the trailer because ninja theory is good
at making no no no i didn't even finish because the name of this trailer is uh oh my god yeah what the
fuck is her name even nariko nariko why nariko is a badass is the name of the trailer oh wait why
the male announcer in the trailer is actually the worst oh yeah there's a new girl in town that's
where i stopped around the narrators hold on i'm facepalming at your goddamn impression yes so so try
try to make it through all that's all the tension just this is made by blocking who are also making
the rationing clinic it's the like d team that works at blocking you know what this strikes me as
four teams there fuck this strikes me as sony could not get any of their ip's on a movie remember
there's supposed to be a god of war movie an uncharted movie and i just want to say this is
the these three movies are handled by sony computer entertainment right not which is not sony no no i
know i know that's weird it is they couldn't get actual motion pictures made so like let's just
spin off into these little cg things and see how they do at least sly doesn't look like a total
disaster sly probably is the best chance of being a decent sly's art style is really the most very
adaptable well i'd say heavenly swords the most suited to it actually but well but not when this
is god damn it yeah i i fucking i couldn't do it i'll try to watch it when it comes out but i
couldn't do it i was peeking through my middle fingers i'd rather see it both your middle fingers
sure uh heavenly sword oh god but i mean that's what sony's calling no it's not it's
nanko band eyes and it's nanko band now i'm caught
bamco i still like bamco not bad let's take a quick word from our sponsors
yo yo what's up well they remember audible i do remember audible i also remember it they have
audiobooks audiobooks have decided to sponsor the podcast once again they're back and we are
back for them because uh audiobooks can be listened to much like a podcast can would you
agree liam yes absolutely i listened to the huck finn by elijah wood actually right um he has such
dulcet tones there you go really does it's a beautiful retelling of huck right so as it was
meant to be told well i like books you like know that i like to read you do enjoy them but i do
travel quite often on the bus and when i try and read books on the bus you know what i do what do
you do vomit right because it's hard it sucks so how would you like 150 000 titles at your selection
at your now i'm on the bus i'm reading a book in my ears reading in your ears i'm not vomiting it
makes the book more enjoyable how sick is that it's not what can you read matt wants to know i was
just gonna ask well what can you read you guys might have heard of a little something called
i have no mouth and i must scream i never heard of this what is that continue harlan ellison
that's not a book that's a video game but it's also a short story damn he has narrated that the
awesome voice of ellison's doing it so he's narrated it wow i've read it before but that's
actually really we're currently playing through this game on our channel and it's awesome because
he's the voice of am and you can check him out reading the audiobook he's got that crazy voice
yes that crazy voice that i bet you if you listen to this book you would go crazy in fact uh his
books in the good way his books are collected as the voice from the edge volumes one through five
that could either be harlan ellison or like a 16 year old golf kid but no it's coming straight
from the old days he's an old-timey writer and he's got that edge to his voice he's really
sorry but it's awesome you listen to it i have i've listened to the audiobook i'm gonna go listen
to it now yeah i like it i have no choice so uh by all means guys if you've been enjoying that
playthrough and you want to hear the source material check out the voice from the edge volume one
i have no mouth and i'm a scream up on audible and you can check that out now free actually because
you can sign up on audiblepodcast.com slash super best holy shit what was that i didn't i
wasn't paying attention i'm drunk audiblepodcast.com slash super best sounds great you can head over
there now and download i have no mouth and i'm a scream and anything else that you see that you
like free for a month that's a hundred and fifty thousand books at the same time we bet you can't
listen to you know what you should try and do you should try and listen to all of them simultaneously
right just overlap speakers on you get like you get speaker your pc speakers then you get your
like your tv with your your your setup and usb keys and then in there and then you get your
iphone and your android you just pump it and just go nuts it's awesome there you go your neighbors
will love you your neighbors will love you because you are cultured for all the information you pump
into their apartment and we will love you and sovilleaudiblepodcast.com slash super best thanks
for sponsoring the show guys thanks very much thank you thank you it is later time it's later
time it is later time what do you mean later time what does that even mean well how mysterious
if you have a letter oh shit and you want to like a typed letter oh christ digitally
oh oh only oh through the internet like an electronic mail that's a very restrictive
in the futuristic world of 2007 sending emails to super best friendcast at gmail.com where's that
that was bad that was good that was not good where's that that's way better super best friendcast
at gmail.com fucking radical if you may sound something like uh yeah let's try to get through
these because we're fucking running off on time um what is your art what is your dream arcade cabinet
that you have in your house asked to build oh that's right the streets of rage cab that only
went to japan already accomplished that dream by having thirst strike in my house so it totally
has the dream so my my my next year number two of dream would be afterburner climax that is fucking
impossible that's the dream that's that's a fantasy that is the grand thing you're not and that's right
if i had to pick one though for real is the new project diva no but it's just so fucking expensive
it's prohibitively okay what is it what's special about the cab it's got uh it's got a strip on it
that you like rub over to no no like like like like on a piano okay right it's like on a piano
um and of course we're already you've been just looking at it it's fine but it costs like over
seven thousand dollars so okay do that yeah it's a fucking music game yeah but you say project diva
there's the part that you rub on i just can't handle it right terminator two arcade game with the
with the guns and all the honors what's in her voice clips and whoever who played sarah connor
in those like it was something friend of one you're supposed to be you're supposed to be to go you
should know this matt wait was sorry i said sarah connor yeah in those games was played by sonja
blade i bet i'm going to what was her name there you go i'm gonna change my answer i don't want a
third star cabinet i want house of the dead two cabinet yeah of course you did sure house of the
dead two greatest game ever made yeah that is sure you shoot the zombies better than never done that
before you'll suffer like g did i know mike wants to know if you guys can clarify for me uh you guys
use the term schmup uh sometimes but my friend refers to them as bullet hell shooters can you
clarify if there's a difference between the two there is totally super difference schmups being
shoot them ups that refers to the genre as a whole that's correct which can be any like
either it could be horizontal or vertical right well the bullet hells can be horizontal no yeah no
no i'm saying i'm saying schmups okay schmup is the larger genre yeah any any vertical or i thought
you were making a distinction that it could be either any horizontal or vertical plane shooter
when you're dodging bullets and doing all sorts of shits i'd hazard it could be even more than that
it could be any but but bullet hell is a subgenre yes it is a much much more specific
type of schmup where in which there are a billion fucking bullets on the screen yes not every game
has a ridiculous screen full of all kinds of bullets of purple projectiles where you have
yeah it's always purple it must be easier to see when you have a simple collision pixel it it's
purple i think because it takes the least memory or something there's gotta be this our mutual friend
told us both this as there has to be a technical there's a reason they're purple no schmup god
pat the other pat told us about how there's a reason why they pick god yeah and and it's
dude he i i can't say it but boy he had an incredible achievement in a schmup game recently
we can say yeah he's not on it anymore he's not number one he fucking destroyed rezzo god he was
number one he was number one and he destroyed ikeruga back in the day you know that dude knows
what he's doing um so yeah games like one else apparently games like that where you have like
a single hitbox pixel and that's the only thing that you can use to dodge between the spaces i
always like to say you occupy the one space on the screen where there isn't a bullet at all time
that's yeah so i mean go look up uh ridin or 1942 and that's a schmup yeah we'll look up musuhime
sama also a schmup but that's a bullet hell shooter in addition to being a schmup there you go um
we're teaching the kids yeah guys we're doing it every week i'm doing it chase wants to know um
if you could get telltale to do your comic dream game um comic dream game what would it be
pusher max i stole it no i wasn't gonna say that i wasn't gonna say that because you say that just
to steal it yeah i wasn't gonna say it because it's terrible i got one i got one because that's a
lot of action and stuff which is not the point of those no it's all the moral decisions the
publisher has to make yeah those shouldn't have another decision yeah it's like the grinder or
like the electric chair that's the publisher game that already i know i i mind is very solidly
okay that makes it very good i i would want why that man why last man why so good choice that'd be
cool although usually there's one good thing that york can do in any given situation oh yeah of
course but you know it would obviously have to be tweaked a lot and no fans would like that but i
would love a reimagining of that that'd be cool sure um i would say i would say either preacher
because that does have tons of moral decisions in that game and it's like kind of an obscure
comic series like walking dead was for a while until it blew up or um our saga as i've already
talked about that would be an excellent fodder because all that all that comic series about
is great dialogue aren't they all they're doing fables yeah they're doing fables right i keep
confusing hi not not saying i keep confusing those two uh yeah they're different um phil wants to know
uh when you guys are recording a let's play do you prefer to be playing or not playing uh i prefer
to be playing if at all possible i don't know about matt matt you seem to be able to go either
way when it's when it's a certain game like there are certain games i i you know i'm not yeah i prefer
to be playing but sometimes matt will be like i don't want to play like okay fucking so all
all to like disaster being a good i think for all of us it just super depends on the it depends on
the game and exactly like i had a really hard time talking in beautiful joe yeah i can see that um at
the same time i think for all of us blind play plus like on the controller plus talking and what
not it's kind of tricky but blind is really really really not that easy to pull off last of us um
metroid fusion down or down poor yeah no no down poor uh homecoming down poor was way worse
uh homecoming the axe dudes uh and yeah which is the greatest thing i've ever done and uh no more
heroes too and no we're not all the same measure that wasn't for you at some sometimes the game
you can totally manage and sometimes you just fall the fuck yeah it's yeah and i mean it it'll
never come across because you guys are like watching the video and just hearing commentary but no you
really are like okay you're trying to figure out what's happening god why is pat so proud at last
of us and trying to not get the stuff going on man i'm juggling a lot of factors that game requires
you to multitask four things simultaneously plus i gotta talk but to but to be fair they tune in
because we're supposed to be good at this i know i'm pretty good now we say the hypers gameplay not
the best game oh yeah um you just have to yell a lot really yeah just yell about boners oh man
did you see that boner oh it's bony uh robbing reka fist says wait a second wait a minute says i
noticed that you guys uh and pat especially are quick to make fun of weeaboo's and distance
yourselves from them that's correct despite being super entrenched in japanese entertainment
my question is who's the biggest weeaboo you knew growing up besides late life well we're not name
and names but yeah josh worse than life well life is bad but they freaked out at me because i said
ega wrong that's true and then there was the castlevania incident no no it's josh you know why
it's josh you remember that time we we it was late and we had to go over to josh's house okay name
the name and we he knows uh and we're not saying his full name and we had to go to his house and we
wanted to check like a bus catcher or something yeah and you moved over to touch his computer
yeah and he went no yeah and you're supposed to like we can't even see the desktop
i was like no we know you can't yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah no uh and josh is the guy that i met that
oh my god that was i didn't want to be in his fucking house after that i was scared for the first
year that i know he's a really good friend of mine uh but for the first year that i knew him um he
actually had trouble talking to people about anything that was not related to digimon
like he couldn't it's hard it's hard to get off did you couldn't hold a conversation like i like i'm
being serious too i don't i don't think i can really spit to you because you don't know anything about
digimon the thing is though like i and i just was it tamers uh he was into tamers of course he was
into tamers he must have been really bothered that digimon fucking died super hard well it'll come
back only in america but that's where it matters but no no and and eventually god you're right he
sends me god damn like camon rider or sentai shit every single day well yesterday he sent me a
fucking message on uh on google just saying hey man fuck for who's gonna win in this fucking movie
and i'm like i don't know what this movie is shut the fuck up josh who do you not want to win uh
who do you want to win josh i'll vote for the other one calmland says uh i just celebrated my
birthday by buying the giant crazy blu-ray gurlagan box set nice that's birthday sitting on my
coffee table that's birthday album but i'm conflicted should i rip it open and rewatch the series and
the quality i was oh or do i keep it pristine god damn it this is tough i don't know what to do i
don't know what to tell i say you torrent that shit and blu-ray no i say you spent the money enjoy it
i say uh if you actually are thinking about this to this level then you're the type of person that
wants the perfect collectors edition so suck it up buy a second blu-ray of the non-crazy box set
yeah watch that instead i say i agree with matt what the heck open it up if you enjoy all the
materials and if you open it up get a bunch of drugs and have like a creepy like gurlagan sex
partner also record it because there's no god damn footage of that shit right like now i personally
would open it immediately yeah but i would open it but i would stare at it for like an hour
and like fight myself yeah yeah i would have physically punch yourself right open it you bought
it you idiot uh good question no enjoy that because that's awesome gorge yourself on this open it
really slow not near food not near the kitchen do some not near children awesome question we got
from a guy physically in the mail bag that's correct uh i'm sorry i don't remember the name
but he asks us what's your favorite video game merchant besides the rise of the resident evil
four merchant because he's obviously the best and he nailed it because like so everybody can agree
resident evil four merchant best merchant who's after that i'm a big fan of rodin from bank yeah
that's a good one i really like his little his little like trivia phrases about i want
to be a space marine or i like put a chainsaw on your eyes i i like uh funky going okay and
but in particular game we're just fucking going in general he's a merchant he sells you're
so cool right not my favorite merchant but god damn her name uh final fantasy 13 to
chuckle god damn it just the fucking name i can't get over the reason that god awful song is in the
game i know not my favorite merchant no no not that song oh right not my favorite merchant but
good name uh um i really like the uh the metal scotsman in double dragon neon who would sell you
oh yeah yeah he was saying does he trebbin count trebbin totally counts i like trebbin super count
trebbin do you guys remember uh starfox adventures of course remember that remember that fucking
loser yeah and he always had to bargain with him he's a super british accent yeah yeah there's
personality there if they don't no try a little higher yeah yeah no that's too yeah yeah that's good
yeah all right good research we're forgetting a super yeah there's oh probably but it's likely
a merchant in the souls series that i'm forgetting that people are gonna get super bad at me for
forgetting but that's nothing's popping out right um Leonardo asks uh this is a bit this is a bit
this oh i didn't it's popping out Leonardo says that um there's a recent fighting game event called
defend the north where there's a controversy great name that's a really good name there's a
controversy between amp flux and cj showstopper these are two awesome players these are also good
names yes um basically the gist of it was during the final is the last set that decided everything
dude accidentally pressed the start button disqualified because it got stuck and you lose the
match yes and no there's no match lost cj lost because uh yeah what's his name um flux just took
the win yeah right now and what how do you guys feel about that scummy it out or whatever it's
you know well that's a rule that has to be in place because fuck not having that not only that
thing make you arcade sticks that makes that not happen yeah but what the whole thing that i
appreciate is that the person who didn't press start has the option of letting it roll yeah and
but otherwise he the other guy who did press start totally fucked up you press start you unplug your
controller fucking whatever that's on you yeah there's a reason there's no pause button on our
case issue with this stick he didn't actually press it but regardless it was one of those things
were as some of who's been there for these things no i've seen it happen i've seen it right you
got to be prepared for that shit that but most of the time nine times out of ten the guy will be like
run let it run let it go you know what i mean like the the the fgc yeah well that show that's a big
thing to do right but generally if it's not a grand finals match they'll probably let it go but it is
and i and uh chirithi has let pause button slide yes he like semi-final yes he has i see
so being a big man everyone's like yeah all right man good shit you know the same time earn it but
don't yeah fucking hit the pause and if it was your stick's fault tough it's your fucking stick yeah
you fucked up the grand final it really sucks and it really sucks for you the controversy is basically
because cj is like he's upset and saying like it's kind of bullshit do it at least at least be
oh it's totally bullshit that's the way it is though if you open that door you're gonna have
people kicking out power cables and shit you're like no there's no no no excuse you have it sucks
and that's i feel bad for you but too bad you have to have these rules yeah or else nothing i love
chaos chaos chaos what was the world before fgc regulation fgc does not need more chaos it really
is true um fgc versus chaos estaban says i'm looking for a handheld system my last generation
was the gameboy color played a lot of pokemon but now i'm trying to decide between a 3ds or a vita
i was um because whatever i get is going to be stuck i'm going to be stuck with it for the long
run and i'm not sure look at the look at the i love my vita but i cannot possibly recommend
anything but a 3ds or any of the 3ds is they're all good i love the 3ds but yeah like like matt
said look at the line up because they are they are different the vita is great for crazy people
like us that own tons of these things i already have a 3ds but if i could only have one it's no
contest i don't know because i love all the stupid japan games like project diva is my
fucking bread and butter right you're gonna take that away kind of why i said exactly look at what
interests like unless unless there's something on the vita that you're like i fucking need that yeah
then like the 3ds is a much safer bet the most cop-out answer but yeah like look at the libraries
3ds is the safer bet yeah absolutely but in particularly for somebody who's been out of
handheld gaming for a while like it's yeah and the 3ds especially the 2ds is way i was gonna say
if you're on a budget 2ds is great as well wait you all here you have all the ds games available
to you as well which is probably the greatest handheld all the time ds light no i mean the ds
library like well it's it's fucking oh my god anything with the world ends with you and a
wendon at the same time historian well that too right yeah guys armageddon 343 asks shirt sizes real
quick uh two excel large two excel excel there we go uh can you repeat that okay it's that we want
we mean pat and i are the same size it gets really bad when we sit next to each other like on a
plus or something and he's like looking at me and like we're the same height he goes what the
fuck is going on because i have baby legs okay i have tiny baby legs the trunk is normal but the
rest is leg size he's like knuckles not the rest which actually leads into another question i can't
find here but someone asks what are some of the worst insults you guys used to call each other
noble baby yeah you bastard pat your noble baby for years i don't like it i've never heard that
before it's old school it's because i have tiny deformed legs old school you only see it when
you sitting next to him on the bus um they dangle we haven't learned we haven't known liam long enough
to get give him like i actually we have never felt the insult they need to insult each other
that's bullshit for nickname type insults not i don't think so many of the many of the worst
nicknames or things that i've called people cannot be repeated on this there you go there you go
so think of the worst thing a human could say did you ever call me and then and then add like four
bad adjectives to it and that's what i call the person there you go that's how you create an insult
kids yeah no just go the worst and then sprinkle a little more devin points out that hey woolly has
done a good job recommending shows to pat yeah and i recommended rick and morty have you guys
checked that should have not i looked on online like i looked at clebson stuff but i haven't download
it i haven't let y'all down so far check it out that's such a fucking self i'm just because i
want i want a question i wanted to find that i wanted to remind you guys to check it out because
i watched another episode and i realized that um chris parnel is is the father on the show as well
he's a he's a permanent on this hey here's an email saying how great i am i better watch the
fucking show this specifically i remember you showing me a show and i was like this is hilarious
do you remember which one it was it was about a little sailor boy
oh um um damn it oh i remember this maybe it's not a pancake but it's a flatjack flatjack
let's remember after you showed me that i looked i looked at as many episodes as i could online
flatjack sick man hell yeah right on um and let's end it off with one more with a good one i hope
one more question all that in with a bad woolly oh here's a good one drink moxie asks drink moxie
shout outs to you i recognize him have you guys uh now that you guys have had your hands on your
next gen systems for a little while have your opinions changed since prior to your purchase um
i i still like the ps4 a lot but i mean the games aren't there but they'll come in the next
year like already the lineup's great yep there's no question i've had a lot of hands on time with
the xbox one uh i like it more than i expected um it's still you know there's still a difference
between them still work to do that um my yeah there's still work to do on the xbox one but the
ps4 because i own that one yeah hardly recommended as usual my opinion has not changed the xbox one
is pretty much worthless except for killer instinct that game is godlike and it's really good at like
helping me be lazy by just shouting commands at it you've been you i can't believe you like not can't
believe but you are the only person to take advantage of that because you see my setup my bed is right
there yeah i just sit in bed and shout go to netflix and play that thing usually you just shout
out your roommate to do that basically but no otherwise i have nothing to say about it there's
nothing on the console but god damn his career is too good i should just make a quick addendum
because the only thing that i could have changed my opinion on was remote play because i couldn't
have known before it came out it works perfectly so yeah how do you feel about it i really like my
ps4 are you using it uh no not that much i beat the shit out of assassin screed 4 and every now and
then i'll play some reservoir some of the other launch titles i picked up i'm not like i played
a bunch of shadowfall multiplayer but ah and i played a ton of battlefield and then i got it
turned me off too bad because the bugs there'll be more games coming out of it i really like the system
i love the controller no complaints it's exactly what i thought it was going to be and that's just
a really really good console i've spent maybe an hour like less than an hour total ever with the
xbox one um i don't even like color instinct is starting to look better and better but it's not
gonna get me to buy the system and i fucking hate the controller i hate the xbox one controller
i think it is no it's something about the ergonomic shape that feels way more like the older xbox
controllers and less like the 360 i hate it it's got a weird feel to it i don't i don't know what
exactly it is either but one platinum makes a xbox one game we'll buy it then then i'll jump on
at that rumored or maybe maybe all jame vu maybe maybe no it's not gonna sound maybe i'll get a
god for an hour and a half game maybe i'll get oh no two hours oh my god i thought i think that's
a little bit different 40 dollars 40 dollars for 40 dollars 20 if you go as low as you can yeah
well i know but still i know we're hoping it was fine regardless of looking forward to phantom
regardless of the length jame vu is not gonna make me buy a console do not mock people for going
this is bullshit no i'm i'm i'm asking you like what what's your what's your but yeah no uh i'll
get i'll get a i'll get an xbox one slim yeah no uh that hopefully comes with no connect um i'm
pretty much in the thing with woolly is like the xbox one like has problems i'm mostly with
the dashboard for me because look where's my stuff where why did they do that friends list
is baffling which is why i just shouted out why why does the b button occasionally do different
things but uh the killer angsting makes it a worthwhile purchase for me just because i i went
from i'm not looking forward to this as this exceeded my expectations for what i was hoping for
so it's worth it for that and i'm like i don't have a ps4 but everything seems finer than ps4
and that's fine i'm completely used to the x-bone controller it's totally okay i think i think it's
fine is it better than 360 controller no of course not i disagree i like it better i think there's a
sit i think there's a very distinct thing that has to do with hand size my hand size i have tiny baby
hands but i will straight up i will straight up say that like i put maybe 65 to 70 of my score
on the d-pad my priority my priority on the d-pad is enormous and this d-pad is so much
better than the 360 yeah no it totally is oh yeah that's no no no one will argue that so so that to
me makes it better yeah and i'll just go to say that i enjoy my Wii U more than my Wii yeah i oh
yeah same here i like the Wii U a lot great yep good good games like they've been playing a lot of
hand help really hands are great and the Dark Souls comes out i'll be playing a lot of pc and
the Vita is better than the psb yes i'd assume oh unequivocably yeah because it has most of the
best psb games on it the 3ds is better than the ds i think my only my only not yet my only point of
contention for the 3ds not being better than the ds is the goddamn flaw where it scratches its own
fucking screen here's the solution buddy i hate that get a 2ds but then i but then i
miss out on the 3d which i like uh which is totally subjective that sucks that you have to
decide for that exactly i'm lucky i hate the 3d i say that it's better just because the e-shop has
so much and then the the ds i i like the e-shop just i wish there was what got me to buy a psp was
uh loco roco pad upon and echocrome yeah those were good stuff so that's the kind of shit that i
need to pull me in look at murasaki baby sure yeah that's one thing yeah that's there um my
Bradley defaults so god uh the existence of that my village is like finished building something
yeah mine too the the existence of kid Icarus makes the 3ds better for me than kids and yeah
i like using my hands yeah so i like being able to use my hands and they're already we can maybe
don't play it on score nine i don't play excessive no that don't play that game there's something about
it that instantly gives me hand pain like like within 20 oh yeah like well a lot of people report
i played it and i was really liking it and i was getting like shooting pain in my hands
and i think that is a god damn shame and that the circle pad implementation was like embarrassing
they couldn't just put it on the circle pad it was such an afterthought this week on the switcher
that's our channel that's our channel i'm not sure if you've seen it have you guys seen it we
play video games on that channel i see this this week on the channel uh we got more scream more
scream more scream scream till you drop more yakuza always and make tons until you drop your
detective thing coming in sorry your investigation my hard-hitting report yeah should be this week
ah cool and maybe just maybe the best of 2013 but it's taking a fucking long time because we
fucking killed it last year we had a we had a really fucked up moment where matt's like okay i'm
doing the best of 2013 thing but we put out like 400 fucking videos more than 365 so he turns
so he turns to me it's his pack can you remember anything from any of the let's plays like oh no
i don't know i remember two things i remember i remember one joke from one lp i need to crowdsource
this shit and sort of start asking people that i know that watch the show no sure man and i mean
like and the things like well stuff like that being made it's like yeah the top 10s are coming
they'll get there but that i think that best of needs top 10s aren't until May though i'm working on
it and it's coming very seriously but suddenly people care a lot man like i'm already the guy
that's like fuck lists you need you need proper time to appreciate the context come on people slash
catch up on what you didn't play no i'm just being lazy okay i have all my footage i just don't
want to do it um yo we should probably go see robocop and figure out what the deal with this
show see robocop did you go see robocop before you go see robocop in the theaters if you go see
robocop well the which you will because we're going watch our robocop remake which is the
fan film made out of like 30 40 different filmmakers that have created a fucking super weird
like crowdsourced robocop remake is it with clips of it is it is straight up they remade the entirety
of robocop one scene for scene everyone gets one scene to make is there one where it's like his
dad and his little kid yeah sure but some of them use muppets wow some of them some of them use
the full length one of which has almost 10 minutes of exploding penises yes wow
that movie is not safe for fucking work yeah so it's called crowdsourced
because if anyone's gonna ruin robocop it's gonna beat us okay okay not bad earlier today some anchor
news anchor mistake mystic um oh my god Samuel L Jackson for Lawrence fishburn and it did not
as well got a shit pushed in it's not even close a good solid myth man the worst bit was this set
up where he's like and you're so successful now with your Super Bowl commercial and he's just like
what's Super Bowl commercial and the anchor's just like oh I mean he's like I'm not Lawrence
fishburn you moron oh I can't tell the difference between black people whoops what's with your wallet
I'm not the other guy either you know for like four minutes he was like my mistake and Samuel
wouldn't let him go yeah and of course it's gotta be Sam Jackson that he fucks this exactly
all right then more infreemen even might have let him slide hell no not Sam Jack and he's like
yeah but to talk about robocop and Sam Jack's like no no we're not moving on from this you know
your job is to read the news and you do the entertainment reports and you can't even make
it just the difference between me and oh man like that's the worst come on yeah dude Lawrence
fishburn doesn't wear the little hat yeah very clearly and he's not God so yeah Sam Jackson's
daughter was not in pornography no he wasn't oh yeah let's no that's okay yeah how about we wrap
this show up let's go yeah see you guys later
you