Castle Super Beast - SBFC 239: We Musn't Forget the Snaliens Lore
Episode Date: March 27, 2018Download for Mobile | Preview Video These Terrifying Robot Wolves Now Prowl Farms in Japan to Keep Boars Away. You can watch us record the podcast live on twitch.tv/superbestfriendsplay  Outro: Kir...by - Planet Robobot Theme The Nintendo Switch Is Finally Getting A D-Pad With A Left Joy-Con From HORI Japan Unleashes "Super Monster Wolves" Pizza Titan Ultra Announced, is insane - First Trailer for Rise of Ninja Turtles - Devolver Picks up The Messenger, Switch version - One Night: 80's themed Action RPG - Diablo meets Earthbound Ace Combat 04, 5, Zero Remasters Might Be In Development Zero Escape Creator To Reveal A Fascinating New Adventure Game In The Near Future Dragon Ball FighterZ Footage Shows Super Saiyan Bardock And Broly’s Eraser Cannon
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Discussion (0)
Did either of you see the Oscar tweet?
Yeah.
Yeah.
It is, Brennan needs to get in now.
Now is the time.
Now is the time.
Now is the time.
Anime is starting to be real without him.
Now, now, now, now, now.
Is that a promotional image that was official?
Yes.
Okay.
But like, did she have input on it?
Could it have been a coincidence?
No.
Is it entirely a coincidence that was then pointed out by a fan that got retweeted?
No.
Is that kind of...
No.
No, she posted, I know she posted the image herself.
But what I mean, you know what I mean, but did it come from a comparison?
What we're talking about is Asuka facing down Charlotte Flair in a very much, like,
to the panel, Dio versus Jotaro, stare down.
And in her tweet, she puts the characters for menacing in there, I believe.
She also says, like, I will sacrifice my humanity to defeat you.
I will use your blood, Charlotte Flair.
This is the greatest thing.
Now, now, now, that's the thing about Asuka is, like, knowing her past of being, like,
a game dev, a graphic designer, and all that.
She gets it.
She understands this shit.
She knows about the cool things, you know?
It's not to be unexpected.
But it's like, what's amazing about it is that a WWE employee or brand manager or marketing
person can just look at that and, like, oh, that's crazy Japanese stuff.
So JoJo Cross WWE starts here.
It's going to happen.
Eyes of McMahon.
Yeah.
Wrestling is just a different anime.
It is.
It's getting truer and truer every day.
Every day.
I thought it was a fake Asuka account.
No way.
I was like, it can't be real.
It's too real.
So at that pay-per-view, the Joestar event begins now.
Let's everyone pay attention to what novelty outfit she comes out in.
Right.
And is the mask that she usually wears gray?
Is it a big yellow coat, et cetera, et cetera?
We're not just pointing at the WrestleMania sign anymore.
We're JoJo pointing at the WrestleMania sign.
Just like, ugh.
That pointing shit is fucking embarrassing.
No, it's amazing.
Now it's amazing.
It got embarrassing and now it's coming back around.
You see the evolution of this joke, right?
I don't know.
It's become fantastic.
Pointing at the WrestleMania sign became so hacky.
It's so ridiculous now.
It became so hacky that it's back to being amazing.
And the only people that are doing it well are, like, both Nakamura,
sorry, the Nacker.
Nackers.
And Oscar are the ones that are at least doing it with some type of style.
Because it's such a goof.
Because it's almost like corporate bedroom triple H.
It's like coming out and going like, OK, you got to point at the sign.
Vince wants you to point at the sign.
You got to hype the people up for the sign.
Rousey just wordlessly awkwardly pointing at the sign.
Because it's all you have to do.
Just guys, we've got to build it up, build it up, build it up.
And then that's what they do.
And these veterans know how stupid that is.
Why is it so embarrassing for you to come out?
Do your promo and like, yeah, good match, you guys.
But I'm going to take you on at WrestleMania.
Wee.
And then Farty Pyro goes off.
And then, like, why is it just that?
You could, it's more impactful to speak.
No, just point at it.
Because building up of the event, you got to get the big numbers.
It took us six hours to put out this sign.
You better point at it.
Look at the sign.
I want the fucking sign to fall into the crowd.
Like, I want some disaster.
No, I want someone to have a match with the sign.
Oh, yeah.
The disaster you're looking for is the crowd trying to get into
every WrestleMania outside.
See, now, luckily, you folks are worrying.
It's like, but Pat, what about the people in the crowd?
Don't worry.
It'll fall into the stands where it's empty.
Nah, WrestleMania.
Well, no, I mean, no, I mean, before WrestleMania.
Like, at the fucking shows where you look at the hard camera
and there's fucking nobody sitting there.
Oh, yeah, when no one can.
Because they can't get everyone in in time.
Because we ever see.
To be fair, that only happened at the one WrestleMania
that I went to.
I don't know if it's happened before.
Will we ever see the indoor lightening ever again
as a special effect?
No, probably not.
I think it happened with a Bray Wyatt thing.
To the point that, like, people doubted it ever happened
because it was like an unrecorded, crazy, dark event.
It was really bad.
There was, like, somewhere in the Attitude Era,
Kane let someone on fire with a lightning bolt.
Yeah, I remember that.
They showed that clip a lot.
And they had to break.
They had to break K-Fade by when the guy's rolling on the floor
and going, oh, my God, on fire.
They have a warning saying this is a stunt.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm like.
But they showed that clip in the Highlight Reels
for years of, like, the dude coming out on fire
and, like, it was just a big dramatic moment.
Comes out of the gorilla position on fire.
What?
What?
What an entrance.
It was no.
All I remember is finding an entrance.
Because I remember there being the lightning event, right?
Where, like, that incident.
Where it could call down and it strikes the entrance.
The stage hand.
Right?
But I remember there also being that thing where, like, yeah,
it hit, like, a coffin, I want to say.
And then the guy comes out of the coffin.
I think there's multiple lightning incidents.
But we just don't know who that was.
Or it was just a rando, you know?
Some rando job or just it was in a coffin.
Sacrifice to Zeus.
And then, like, I think someone tweeted after we first talked
about this or something to describe how that was, like,
illegal technology that they were not supposed to use
in that state or something.
Illegal technology.
It was illegal.
From the government.
It was, like, unapproved pyrotechnics of some kind.
You know what?
And so that's why they kind of downplayed that it ever
happened a bit because they weren't supposed to do that.
Or something along those lines.
Then they used the clip for years.
Yeah.
But they only showed the guy on fire.
Never, never.
Never the lightning.
No, the lightning was a one and done row.
I got to show you guys the electrified steel cage
match that the Dudley boys had in TNA.
Where, all right, this is bullshit.
How do you prove it's real?
So they go electrify the steel cage.
Then they have this big hose.
And they just clunk it into the side of a regular cage.
And they play the sound of.
It like.
You know, like the hum.
And whenever someone, like, they have to climb up on the
turnbuckle and they're like, to physically do it,
I need to grab.
And they, they're like, it's too light of a thing and
will ruin it.
So don't play anything.
But in the big plan spots, they'll throw divon and they
play the sound of the buzz.
And he just goes, ah, it's so electrified.
It's so bad.
That is fucking awful.
No, I love that.
Yeah, I know.
I was deciding up until the last second,
whether I loved or hated that.
And at the last second I served and I love it.
And they put blue lights on it.
Because I want to see like in post when you have it on,
when you have it on the air,
I want to see like Blanka asks like special effects.
I want someone to animate.
Yeah.
For me, when I, if I were watching that match,
I would just be like looking for just a horrible timing
errors.
Like it happens all the time.
Why does it still buzz five seconds after the thing?
And you see a guy in the back just smashing on some keypad.
And then later to they, they climbed to the top of the cage,
but he finds rubber gloves.
Oh, shit.
But they're like, oh, it's a good thing his boots are rubbered
to.
Oh, yeah.
They're just regular sneakers.
Like those rubber sold sneakers for electricity.
It's the worst.
The commentators are trying to save it.
And they can't.
I don't like, even though there's no version of that,
like no matter how low level you made like the current,
like there's no way that would ever be approved by anyone
that has.
A fan could jump the fucking barrier and just kill themselves
in a second.
It's beyond fathoming like that.
That would ever be approved by any sort of building code
in the promo.
In the promo package leading up to a Conan is in this group,
by the way.
Yeah.
LAX, which is Latin American exchange.
And they're like the big thugs.
Yeah.
They're like the big thugs.
And Conan does a promo where he tasers Spike Dudley.
And that's where you get it.
They put animated Blanca effects in the promo package
and they like invert the colors.
Put the electricity on him.
I want Charlotte Flair and Oscar and like a Mortal Kombat ring.
Yeah.
Well, I think what the real version of that event that would
make sense would be like not a, not a cage,
but just a group of people with tasers.
You get to like Def Jam Fight for New York it.
Yeah.
You get pushed into the crowd and they fucking zap you
and push you back in.
I'll believe a taser because like you don't see.
Because that's our cattle prod or some shit.
Yeah.
So that's how you sell it.
That's how you sell it.
Inferno matches.
Nah, man.
You just have a wrestling match, but in between rounds or whatever.
Rounds?
What am I, I'm trying to push this joke too far.
That's two out of three falls.
Yeah, sure.
You have to do the milk challenge from Kenny Rogers,
Jackass with the cattle prods.
Remember we tried to do that inferno match in a WWE game
in a video like years ago.
And it just, it wouldn't work.
Just like almost every other inferno match ever.
Every ever, yeah.
Amazing.
When are we going to get the fucking highway to hell
or whatever the fuck match that was in a video game?
King of the Road.
King of the Road.
And then there's the fucking blade button.
And then when you hit the blade button,
the camera zooms out into bullshit and you can't play the match.
Is that a match in the back of a truck?
Yeah dude, we talked about this.
But we're also talking about when the camera zoomed away
when you guys were playing backstage assault.
Remember when the camera went overhead?
Because you guys got too far away.
And you guys died.
I knew it was coming up.
It's because we bladed.
When are we going to start blading on the spot?
Still waiting.
Still waiting for that game that features like
selling and blading as a primary mechanic.
If we ever meet like indie game developers and they have
like a wrestling engine and it's like really like basic
and it's just like, oh, we're starting to make a thing
like here, here, listen to our pitch.
Yeah.
But the question you have to ask for a game.
And you can fumble with your blade.
Is how many smarks are out there that buy wrestling games?
I think enough.
Like it would work.
I think if you made it funny enough, it would be a concept.
Matthew would love it.
Matthew would tell, like talk about it.
And then that would be enough sales.
Yeah.
Right there.
Think.
I would just like, I would love to have a story mode where
it's like, say you play as Goldberg and it's like, you go
outside and are told to smash the limo's fake window.
The limo has a real window.
What do you do?
Smash it and fuck your hand up for months or smash it.
Well, your cred goes up, but your stamina goes down.
No, your cred doesn't go up because no one knows you did that
until years later.
Yeah.
Everyone just assumed it was fake glass until your ear is
partially chewed up.
Wrestling glass.
How many months was he out?
Do you remember?
Oh, he was out for a while.
He slashed his fucking hand.
Six.
Okay.
For no reason.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
And the whole thing was that he had a hidden pipe.
Yeah.
He's going fucking pushy.
Which is why, I'm saying which is why, like, if anything,
looking at a hardcore decision like that from the business
end, they'd be like, you fucking moron.
Yeah.
Now you're gone for a long time.
Like, you're not injured enough that you can't be there.
You can talk and got promos.
Speaking of which, Daniel Bryant's corpse approved medically
to return to the ring.
To not saying that he's coming back.
To saying that someone has approved his corpse.
I want to, I don't know who he's wrestling yet,
but I want him versus AJ Styles in a,
is the earth flat match?
Oh, no.
Oh, man.
Oh, man.
Now, if it's not flat right now, I'll suplex you so hard
that the earth will bend.
Yeah.
There it is.
No, like, flip around and like, spin and attack this.
There's just something.
Since it's the center of the universe.
There's just something really weird and almost like,
pure pressurey that feels like he didn't agree to necessarily
come back, but they just got the results from his test and
then published them anyways.
You know what I mean?
The feeling of like, hey, anytime he wants to come back,
it's up to him.
If you don't see him, it's all his fault.
Just saying.
Kids, you thought Daniel Bryant would never recuperate to be
in the ring, but ask our WWE scientificians.
They'll tell you that Daniel Bryant is completely cleared to
go into the match.
Oh, no.
It's all on him.
No, what I want, I want in this.
What are you waiting for, Daniel?
Hypothetical wrestling game.
Yeah.
You have a horrible bad match injury and then the,
the, the, the fucking choice is listen to your doctors or
wrestle anyway.
That's awesome.
And then every match afterwards, the specter of death
literally hangs out next to the ring and tries to get you.
So whenever you're like knocked down hurt on this,
near the ropes, death like reaches out for you and you
have to roll away from death.
Where I'll suffer a crippling neck injury.
You know, that's fun, but I wanted to be a bit more like
EPO where your character just has the information that if you
are not careful, you will die in this match and you don't
know what possible spot.
There's a damage threshold that your character can reach
now.
And if it passes it, they'll just instantly die.
Yeah.
Okay.
These are all great ideas.
All every single one.
I'm telling you, I'm telling you, it's, it's, it's not a best
seller, but it's a niche.
And then fucking Kurt Angle shows up with your funeral to
talk about drug abuse.
That's the more shocking thing that Kurt Angle is cleared to
have a, even a tag team match.
Kurt Angle is cleared to fucking walk around and talk to
people.
And even then to slow down, you know why he got cut from
WWE?
Because they were worried he would die in the ring.
Yes.
Because in his interviews, he was talking about how every
morning was waking up in pain.
The only way to get rid of this was to get to normal.
So they cut him like not because like you did bad, but
like we just, you're not going to rehab or not.
You are, you are going to be a news disaster in about one
month.
So why don't you be a news disaster while you work for
TNA?
Daniel Bryan is apparently dying to get back in the ring.
Oh, shut up.
But I think it would be hilarious if he wasn't.
That's what I'm saying.
I think Daniel Bryan is not.
No, I'm yelling it shut up because you're saying like he's
dying to get.
Oh, God.
Will they just kill Daniel Bryan?
You better hope he doesn't die.
Stop it.
All right.
Why'd you do it?
You caused his death.
Why'd you kill Daniel Bryan?
He's like a weird gnome wrestler and everyone loves him.
Loves him a lot.
Pat, tell us about your drug habits.
Son of a bitch.
I knew it.
Yeah.
Oh, I've been playing a lot of Warframe this week.
It's really fun.
It's a fun game where you shoot things and you be a
space ninja.
Was money spent on Warframe?
A little bit.
The Red Bulls down the street are half off.
Actually, if you go buy them, do you want to go get some
free Red Bulls?
I can get you some free Red Bulls.
Just give me the money.
So, Willie, give me some money and I'll give you some free
Red Bulls.
Willie, you joke.
You joke.
Yeah.
But I don't know if you remember, but almost every
podcast for the past couple months, I've been sitting here
with two Red Bulls.
I know.
Willie's bringing it up.
You know why?
Yeah.
Because they're half off.
They sure are.
That's like getting them for free.
It's like a free Red Bull.
That's like getting them.
That's like a free.
No, no.
That's like they're both free.
You walked in and they handed you Red Bulls for showing
up.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yes.
Give me the money and I'll give you some free Red Bulls.
Okay.
I already had one today.
That's too much, probably.
I had fun just looking in the kitchen going, this shit
needs to leave.
And I'm gathering up all the Red Bull cans and I can't close
the garbage bag because they're filled to the top and we're
all guilty of filling it to the top.
But I had to allocate some Red Bull cans to another bag to
close the original Red Bull can bag and carry it out outside
and it was an experience.
I didn't know empty aluminum can actually feel heavy if given
enough.
It is metal.
Metal is heavy.
You talk to a hobo about it.
I'm sure.
I'm sure they do.
You talk to a hobo?
No, I'm saying if you talk to a hobo about it, I'm sure
they'll tell you like you put enough in a bag and it weighs
it out.
I mean, I used to empty out the fucking the bags out of those
can crushers.
Pat.
Let me tell you, those things are heavy as shit.
Pat.
I don't think I mentioned that the half off deal is only
available for 48 hours.
While this little icon appears in the top corner of your
vision.
That's great.
So every waking moment you're going to know there's a free
rubble I could be having right now.
I could be having a free rubble.
But you're not.
You're wasting your time.
All right.
Here's the deal.
Here's the deal.
You're wasting free.
I bought 100 bucks worth of plat on Warframe.
It's not a little bit of money.
I was planning to.
It's not about the action.
Hold on.
Okay.
Let me finish.
The important thing to note here is that I had been planning
to spend money once a coupon showed up.
I was going to hope it was the 75 percent one, but it was a 50
percent one.
No, the joke is not the action of buying $100 worth of
micro transaction bucks.
That's probably going to last me forever because the only thing
you can't get with.
We'll see.
We'll see.
We'll see.
We'll see.
We'll see.
No.
The.
The.
The.
The joke here.
Get your.
Get your tube.
The funny Joe rapper on your arm.
Is that everyone's having a laugh because everyone's having a
giggle because I correctly identified the nature of a sale,
which is if something is 50 percent off and you spend like say
10 bucks and they give you a $20 thing for 10 bucks.
That means they gave you 10 bucks for free.
That means it costs nothing.
Here's why.
Here's what it's.
Here's why it works.
And here's why it's hilarious is because we got to watch the
process of Paul marketing job.
Yeah.
Completely from the moment it hits your retina, go through
the brain and at every stage you had, you were able to comment
on it live as the endorphins kicked in until the eventual
purchasing.
Paul, he knows his job is done when he doesn't have to do
anything.
I should mention Pat bargaining with himself until the
purchase is made.
The most one sided.
I should mention, uh, I'm going to try and fight.
It's a solidest 113 video and it's a compilation of me losing
my mind.
So I didn't realize that I was like rubbing my face.
You were and shit.
When I was all the tells.
So I was going to do a stream and then I hit the, oh, I'm going
to log in.
So everybody doesn't see my password and stuff.
And then I log in.
The first thing is 50% off and it's only good for two days.
Push a man.
Digital extremes is your push to push a man.
Listen, I'm supporting the low.
I'm supporting the Canadian economy here.
But you condemn this when it's not a game you like.
You could be your money could be going towards starving
orphans around the world.
It's about that endorphin rush.
Yeah.
That content.
No, that is the core of it.
You can dress it with anything.
No, you don't know, but the hit into the veins is pure.
It is undilated.
You know, I'm diluted.
Excuse me.
And it's very dilated.
It's very deep.
The pupils are.
Oh boy.
So I think what you owe back and look, my pupils got real big.
No, genuinely, though, I can do it.
You coward.
Like, here's the.
Yeah, I had planned to spend money on the game.
But yeah, get like that process is very fun for me where I get
to Jones for my drug fix.
That's I very much enjoy it and I can stop whenever I want.
And people actively chime in to go do what you fucking coward.
Yeah, man.
It's all Sarence fault.
It's all this guy.
I know his name's Sarence.
His fault.
He dared me.
What are you going to do when somebody dares you not do it?
Saren, huh?
Yeah.
Interesting name.
Yeah.
Like the gas, like the toxic nerve gas.
Little bit.
Little bit.
I feel bad because I apologized to him yesterday for throwing him under the
bus and now here I am.
That day later throwing him back under.
Get back under there.
No, Warframe is fantastic.
I'm continually surprised and weirded out by things in that game.
Like I played it.
Like, well, you played Monster Hunter for what?
A bunch now, right?
Yeah.
I think I put whatever.
You put in the hours.
Right?
Half of that.
Okay.
So you're.
So you got past the tutorial.
Yes.
Yes.
Exactly.
So you're getting like a feel of it, right?
You're getting like a handle on the general structure.
I still don't have that for Warframe.
Like I'm still just, I start a quest and every step and every word in the
objective is baffling to me.
That's because you're still fucking with the powdered shit, man.
You got to get on those rocks.
Wait, have you got to get on those rocks?
Have you played any?
It's faster.
Yeah.
Have you played any of Warframe?
No.
All right.
If you want, if you want to give it a shot now is the time because they're doing an
anniversary thing, which gives you a bunch of stuff.
We'll do it on video at some point.
Okay.
We'll do it the next couple of days then I guess.
Yeah.
That's pretty much all I did is I played a shit ton of Warframe.
It's great.
It's really good.
You should try it.
I mean, I tried it like years ago when it first launched.
Yeah.
I know it's a lot different now.
It was bad.
Yeah.
See, I had a problem with just the movement.
It's still janky and it still looks janky, but I mean, it looks better.
So I looked up a bunch of stuff.
Well, there was the no clip documentary and the movement.
The movement used to be really normal.
Like you would run and there was like a DMC style wall run and that was it.
Well, what happened?
Yeah.
What happened was, do you know why they created that?
Well, it looks cool.
So no, what happened was is there was this horrible bug where if you had certain weapons
and you like aimed at the floor weird and jumped and did a swing, the physics would break
and you would slingshot like an asshole all the way across the map.
Amazing.
Oh, that's like Guns of the Dual.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
And it was a bug and it was super popular.
It was called coptering.
Yeah.
And they went, okay, we can either fix this, but people really like it.
Yeah.
So why don't we just make it so that everyone can do that and it's part of the game.
But they never redid any of the levels for it.
Right.
And now all the levels are like these long corridors and they're windy and you're going
way too fucking fast for them.
Yeah.
In Guns of the Dual, they had butterfly, which is basically like wall jumping with a shotgun
and a sword in the other hand and slicing.
Yeah.
It honestly feels like the same kind of mistake that led to skiing in tribes.
Yeah.
The movement in someone sent a like, here's what good PVP looks like video.
And there was definitely some cool like wall running battles.
Yeah.
You know, these people basically like fighting on the side of a skyscraper.
Yeah.
You know, and it was like, that's rad.
That looks pretty cool.
Did I talk last week, Warframe, about like DMC versus Dynasty Warriors?
No.
I think so.
So that's probably the weirdest thing about the game is that the farther you get into
it, the more it changes.
When you start the game, it feels like a Devil May Cry style game in which you are comboing
and doing wall running and ninja stuff.
And I killed this guy and then I jumped over here and I shot this guy.
The farther you play and the stronger you get, the more the game starts to turn into
Dynasty Warriors.
And the gap between the low and the high end of players is so I've never seen a larger
extreme in player power.
So say you have a defense mission, right?
And defense mission is just protect the point and waves, right?
It's just horde mode, right?
I am running around.
I pop my ability.
I'm going to do my charge move.
Oh, I knocked those three guys over and I shoot that guy bang bang.
The guy in the middle of the room puts his hands out and a giant red dome appears around
him and every single enemy for the remainder of the 20 minutes that touches that sphere
dies.
And he just does emotes as this occurs.
And I don't know what he's doing because there's enough like characters.
But I look at that and I go, I don't know what that is.
And the guy isn't playing the game anymore because he has made himself so strong.
Right.
His number is so big.
His number is so...
He's Jiren.
He's the biggest number.
And like you get to see everybody in every part of that where it's like they're not that
strong in terms of power, but they're so much faster than you are because they're just better
at it, but that everyone is sitting for you at the end of the mission.
But are you only not knowing what that thing is because like, like, can you just go to
the menu of Upgrade Trees and just highlight the gray box that tells you what that is?
I would be able, I could go to the, I could recognize what that guy looked like, go into
the frame list and go, oh, that's Equinox.
And then next to Equinox is a list of abilities.
And then you look at four and four is that AOE is anybody that steps into it, takes damage.
And at the end of the cast, it explodes outwards and does all the damage again.
And the guy stacked like, and I asked somebody, he's like, oh, he stacked a billion time mods
on it.
So it lasts forever now.
So it lasts like a minute instead of 10 seconds.
Right.
And that's how that, but like, it's just, just nonsense.
Just players sipping around.
I played with a guy yesterday.
I think it was Ember who, it's the fire one.
Their ultimate is just fire.
Ever.
It's called World on Fire.
It's just fire everywhere, everywhere.
And every enemy in a vicinity of them just catches on fire and dies.
And they're just running through the level as everything around them just dies.
And I'm just trying to catch them to get to the end of the mission.
And then I have like a shitty little gun and a pew.
Like, so MMOs have a problem of it's hard to distinguish what is the strong player versus
the weak player.
So that's why it's all gear.
It's like, oh, they have the shiny mount.
They have this here.
You're looking at a God creature.
But they also have the shiny gear.
And they also have the shiny gear because they spent all the time making their warframe
Barbie pretty.
Yeah.
It doesn't have that World of Warcraft like you have giant neon angel wings shooting
out of your ass.
Hell yeah, it does.
Is it the exact same?
You want to pay 75 Platte and get big dumb angel wings.
Because they're robot angel wings.
Yeah, they didn't look, they didn't look as like really wow over the top.
They're pretty consistent.
They are more internally consistent than what I'm trying to get.
And part of the reason is that wow's art style is big and bulky.
So things get really big and weird.
Whereas warframes is kind of this sleek organic look.
So it's a little more subdued than you would have expected.
Yeah, like I didn't see anyone walking around with like the Sephiroth as a glowing icon
behind them.
You know, like it's a little bit more muted than that.
But yeah, I know that.
But everyone's standing together in a crowd watching like.
Oh man, it's impossible to.
Garish.
It's very garish.
In towns near quest givers you get this really bizarre thing where you can't tell where
one player starts and another ends.
Yeah.
Because it's all weird smooth organic lines.
It just looks like a big Akira mass of robots.
Orgy.
It's rough.
And I mean like five standing together look awesome.
12 is a little rough.
30 is a problem.
Yeah.
That's where that design starts to become hard to read.
The other problem is that like, well, you probably saw some of the Barbie dolls I made
on Twitter that I put them up, right?
I know because you mentioned them to me.
It's like, oh, I spent, I don't know, half an hour coloring this thing.
Because it has so much color combinations possible, the ability for just the most eye-searing
garbage imaginable is extremely hard.
Here the color wheel comes into play.
Yeah.
Just like the brightest, most saturated yellow with the, like just the absolute worst shit
ever.
Someone showed me a Gundam though and I was like, that's.
That Gundam isn't even a player.
That Gundam was built out of housing bullshit, just carefully cobbled together.
That's incredible.
That's fucking red.
Yeah.
And Gundam is a popular thing.
I was asking people, how do I color this thing?
I'll go look at a fighting game character or go look at a Gundam and use the, like, just
pick one of those colors to start and then match the rest.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep.
It's a good game.
It's a very Canadian game also.
Yes.
It's not.
There are.
It doesn't look very Canadian.
There are fucking novelty stickers with bagged milk in that game.
Okay.
Never mind.
That's the most Canadian thing of all.
Don't.
Is there a Tim Hortons?
Maybe.
Warframe.
Wake up, Tim Horton.
No.
Tim, oh.
Time Horton.
I'm trying.
As long as you don't, as long as you're not, like, trying to find their offices, I think
it's okay.
Well, they're just out in London, Ontario.
Yeah.
It's not that far.
It's really not that far.
Probably the most bizarre, like every, every day that I play there's something that I don't
understand and it's really weird and somebody has to explain it to me.
The most bizarre thing in that game by far is something that no one will explain to me.
And I kind of appreciate everyone's with strength, withdrawal.
With strength or withdrawal?
With strength.
Everyone's restraint.
Everyone's restraint.
I was in a mission and I was fighting a boss and then I looked over at a guy and the guy
did something.
Like, there's a lot of characters with weird powers.
I straight up did not understand what I was looking at.
Like, it was baffling to me what this character was doing in, in the match.
And I went and I asked some people, what is that?
And I said, don't ask what that is.
That's a spoiler.
There you go.
Okay.
But, but the guy, the guy was just doing it.
Yeah.
What do you mean?
How can it be a fucking spoiler?
It was a, it was a gameplay thing.
He was just doing it.
It was like, and no one didn't.
Yeah.
And that's cool.
That's cool.
It's cool.
But that's pretty much it for me.
Just, just more Warframe.
It too.
Frame of Wars.
Well, you guys didn't see it.
So I'm not going to talk about it too much, but I saw Pacific Rim, the rising of up.
It's there.
The movie is there.
Things just need to be shifted.
And I had fun with it.
It's inferior to the first one in every way.
Not going to get that wrong.
But it's better than every Transformers.
It's better than every, like other things still.
Because at the end of the day, I'm realizing, I'm watching this thing and I'm just like,
man, I wish that, that Yeager design was better.
Man, I wish that Kaiju design was better.
Man, I wish that like character was doing something different.
It's still robots fighting monsters.
So at the end of the day, I'm just like,
Just not as much of that as, as we'd hope.
No, there's actually a surprise.
I actually thought going into it had lower expectations and it kind of
because we had a previous discussion before you saw it about how the reviews are coming in
and there were a little bit on the rough side.
Yeah, they were.
And some of them were like from people that I really like the first one I adore.
I'm like, I adore the first one.
I was like, that's like eight.
It was a lot of fun to me.
It was a lot of fun.
But I'm just watching this and I'm like looking for all the good stuff and I'm just trying to like,
you know, downplay the stuff I didn't like as much.
And like, yeah, it's just everything is just not as good.
It's cheaper.
The acting is maybe slightly worse.
Some of the characters have arcs that are interesting.
Some of them are not.
Some other characters are not treated as well from the first movie.
Some of them are more going on.
So it's really like a mixed bag.
Does the big battle during the day look better in the movie than it does in the trailers?
So I think it's like once you've watched the movie up to that point,
you get used to the admittedly faster weight of the things happening on screen.
It's not as heavy.
It's not as methodical as the first movie, but it got used to it.
And if you think about it in a more animatish way, it was like entertaining.
And that when that final fight happens, I was like, fine with that final fight.
I actually mean like the look of it in terms of like the day because there's a lot of daytime
encounters with things.
So you're again used to there's one nighttime encounter.
Most of Pacific Rim was at night.
All of it was at night.
And I just assumed that was because it's easier to make CG look better at nighttime lighting.
It is in the water, halfway, you know, in the ocean.
But I think here they were looking to try and have a different look.
But I was really worried about everything up until, I mean, it's not really a spoiler,
but in trailers and such, we've seen that there's a black Jaeger that seems to be fighting
other Jaegers.
That's evil bad.
That's Obsidian Fury, which is really fucked up name now that I think about it because
oh, that's Obsidian Fury.
That's it's rage.
That's that's the noble.
That's the robot's name.
That robot never names itself.
It never designates itself as anything.
People just call it Obsidian Rage.
That's the name that they gave it.
So why did you give it the coolest name?
It's a bad.
It's just black rage.
Black rage.
Black rage.
Black anger.
The rage of Africa.
So when that first has an encounter with another Jaeger, it does one of the coolest like melee
moves I've seen.
And as soon as it happens, I go, OK, I am fine with the fighting for the rest of this.
OK.
Like it had such.
So Virgil saves it for you?
Kind of.
But you know, you have to see it for yourself.
But I still enjoyed it.
It's not as good as the first one.
I do hope that China saves us again.
And because worldwide, this made $150 million in one weekend, but here it made less than
even the first one.
Yeah.
That depends on if they know, boy.
That depends of a what?
What?
Punch it out.
OK.
Just substitute whatever horrible thing you wanted, Willie, to say in your mind.
Yeah.
Laugh to yourself.
Yeah.
I'll just I'll just I'll just say that like recently, there's been some articles written
about the Black Panther Chinese reviews.
Oh, and there's been some things about how the Star Wars last Jedi poster is the exact
same in China, except a certain element is just photoshopped out of the poster.
Sure.
Photoshopped as the color grading on the post everything else is the exact same.
Are you sure it's not the color grading?
Yeah.
You sure it's just not the color grading?
Certain character just removed, removed.
And those Black Panther reviews.
It's a big movie market.
Are hilarious.
It's a big movie market.
There's a lot of money to be made there.
It's like it did make more in China than it did here.
It's a little bit rough if you can't relate to the characters.
Is there like a special Chinese cut of the film?
There's a Chinese cut of like Avengers.
Yes, I do know that.
Yeah.
With extra Chinese people in it.
Yeah.
Because they saved Tony Stark's heart.
Yeah.
But yeah.
Man, just could you, oh, could you imagine like a Chinese cut of Star Wars where Finn
is just gone and haunted or?
Well, some guy made a cut with no women in it.
So I guess anything is possible.
Isn't that cut like 14 minutes long or something?
It's 47 minutes long, I believe.
I never watched it, but so there's that.
I booted up Sea of Thieves, which I was looking forward to that.
Well, I remember when we watched an E3 thing where a bunch of people are playing and I
forget which one of you, but someone someone was poo pooing it going on.
I don't really care.
I was okay.
Sure.
But for whatever reason, I was like, yeah, maybe just because I was happy, rare was actually
making a video again.
So I went into it and I played about an hour and I'm not sure what I played.
Really.
I, it was such exactly is the most awkward start of a game I've ever done where it's
just like, choose your pirate.
Here's a bunch.
Here's six pirates.
I don't like any of these guys.
Oh, press this button.
You randomly generate another pirate for you, but I want to make my own pirate.
Here's some of these pirates.
Okay.
I'll just keep randomly generating until one till I find one that's.
So you can't choose your own features?
If I can, I haven't found the ability yet.
Maybe I need to go farther into the game.
That seems like a bizarre roadblock to hit so early.
I don't know.
I may need to play it more, but.
No, no, no, not on you.
Just like, why would they have a random generate, but not a.
Okay.
And maybe I need to find a person that can then.
Generate your generate my pirate for me.
And I'm just the movement is like your faith.
You move super fast and you glide, which I wasn't anticipating.
I was, oh, you're clunky, like.
I tune pirates and I'm like, that's weird.
Got used to that.
The game looks really nice.
Visually, it's, it's quite attractive looking, but it's, it's a lot more of an MMO than I
originally realized.
I thought it was kind of a single player thing and you can bring, you can hire people online
to help you.
But no, it's an MMO for all intents and purposes, like not a lot of shit.
It has voice acting.
It's a, it's a shopkeeper's like.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I'm like, okay, it, I just realized as I was playing, I'm like, no, this isn't.
I actually, somebody asked me about that.
Yeah.
About almost a black panther.
That's not the right thing.
See if these yesterday.
And I'd actually like, there's something they were talking about for this game, which I
think is probably the biggest design problem.
And you would have run into it relatively quickly, Matt.
Yeah.
Is that they were pimping this out very much before the game came out.
It's called lateral progression.
It's their bold new idea.
And the bold new idea is that all progression in this game is cosmetic.
There's absolutely no statistical or item advantage you can possibly achieve ever.
That's interesting.
You'll never, like you start with every possible tool you have.
Yeah.
When you're starting guy has like a million things.
And you'll never get a new item.
And unless they add a new one to the game, but then you'll just have it.
Okay.
And everything that you acquire ever is cosmetic.
There will never be any acquisition of any new gameplay number, feature, style, or otherwise.
That sounds like an interesting choice that would probably upset a lot of people who want
a lot of experience.
So like the thing is, is that there's, I've played a bunch of MMOs and this is an argument
there between vertical and horizontal progression.
Yeah.
Vertical progression is really simple.
I get a big sword.
I used to kill a bigger monster, bigger monster gives me better sword, so on and so forth.
Big numbers, big numbers, big numbers.
And then, and then you eventually slam against the top.
Yeah.
And that's the problem with vertical progression is that, and then you have horizontal progression,
which is way, way, way harder because you have to make 10 big swords and they all have
to do something different.
Right.
And maintain an interesting like.
Right.
And horizontal progression is like, like Eve has both, right?
It's vertical, but then you also have horizontal, right?
Warframe has both.
There's vertical in terms of character power and then there's horizontal in terms of type,
right?
This is like, I feel like they wanted to trick people into thinking that this progression
was a progression, but it's not progression at all.
Lateral progression doesn't mean anything.
It's just cosmetics.
Yeah.
You don't get, and I don't like, I love my big numbers, obviously.
I'm playing a game right now.
I'm always playing a game about bigger numbers, right?
You make love to big numbers.
I'd love big number, but like, the number is supposed to enable you to do a different
thing, or a thing you do now better.
That's why I've read reviews of this and I kind of felt the same way about them that
they're like, the charm of this game is finding other players and dumb stuff to be happening
with them.
That's what you're seeking because your quests are very repetitive.
Your quests are always go to this island, find different clues to find that island,
get the treasure, and the treasure is used for what again?
Accessories.
Accessories.
And like, that don't do anything.
I don't hate that on principle.
I don't hate that on principle either.
You like rolling around in ships now, basically, versus Assassin's Creed 3.
And it's really good in this game, right?
The ship stuff is good.
But you'll never get anything for your ship.
You'll get a different sail or whatever.
Not only that, but when you start the game, it says, do you want to start off with a small
ship, with a small crew?
Do you want the big ship right now?
So you can choose big ship, big crew.
Like I said, it depends on how much fun the game is outside of that, but as a principle,
that doesn't turn me away at all.
You need a posse.
You need a group to play this.
I need to see what the rest of the game has going on.
For me, because it's not even like I can't get a bigger number.
It's that once I do everything once, and I've literally done everything that the game has,
and there's nothing for me to change or increase or upgrade or vary, right?
Like, for fuck's sake, like not having new weapons to unlock, or not even that they're
stronger, right?
But that they're different.
Yeah.
Like, is baffling to me.
Well, is combat the focus?
I don't know.
You understand?
But a lot of what you're saying revolves around combat being the focus.
It's not the focus.
Yeah.
But you do fight skeletons, and you do fight other players too.
But I mean, I'd say it's like 20% of what you do.
Right.
So it depends on what your goals are.
Yeah.
Well, let me ask you then, what is your goal in Sea of Thieves?
Well, your goal is to literally just have a crew and let's set out and get treasure.
And I guess you can delegate that to like, you be the clue guy, you be the guy that's
using the spy glass, the telescope or whatever.
And you can assign roles, but no one is, there's not a class per se.
Okay.
There's kind of classes, but.
So the core of the game is.
It's pirating.
Everything is in, all pirating is basically in service to get treasure, right?
In that case, the treasure better be something that I want, right?
Well, the treasure is treasure to exchange for money to buy things, I'm assuming.
Right.
But every item in the game is just skin.
So it's like, if I can't like, you know what I'm saying here?
Like games that have like intrinsic value, extrinsic value, reward loops, where it's
get item and the game is built around get item.
The item has to have objective value to a player.
And I think of this and I go, and it's ironic because I just spent $100 on space hats.
Yes.
But that's because it's on.
Because you want to do the big numbers while looking cool.
While looking cool.
Yeah.
But the reason I like that game is to get the big numbers.
Right.
Right.
But again, this is the thing that that strives more on your interaction with other people.
Like I found if you want a single player expert, like do not play this.
Like you're not going to have that much fun unless this could be considered a gateway
payment to having fun with other people.
But I was playing with Rando's and I was not.
Did you play No Man's Sky Matt?
For about two hours.
Would you describe this as No Man's Sky with multiplayer?
There's definitely more.
There's definitely more here than No Man's Sky, especially in the early going because
like you're interacting with someone date second one.
Yeah.
As soon as you get generated onto the starting island, there's other people running around
and you're like, hey, you want to you want to join up?
Want to join up?
You all get into a ship.
You go.
So but it is the same sort of like idea where it's like venture out forth and like fine
shit and no real direction.
I mean, there is if you want it, but like it's closer to the thing that I was thinking No
Man's Sky was in my head, but it wasn't there.
I don't know.
Like this, this like I haven't played it.
I've watched some people play it on Twitch and it just seems like it seems like a crab
cat put out a decent video.
It's like it's a disguised early access game.
That's how it appears.
Yeah, I've heard that sentiment.
Especially since the devs are talking about how they're going to keep adding stuff for
five to 10 years and how, oh, don't worry that there's not much in the game right now.
And it's like, I think their big thing was that like their last beta or two, there was
like even less like a couple of months ago.
And they added things called a Scully Forts, which are basically like basically like the
big skull hangouts in Breath of the Wild, where there's like a really good treasure inside.
And it's a very risky reward thing to go in there because there's high level skeletons
enemies in there.
But the reward is really big and anyone can you can be another crew looking at another
crew, get it.
And while they find the skeletons, you could actually sneak in and steal.
That's the type of stuff that it's banking that people will have fun with.
And that's it.
In the No Man's Sky analogy, to be fair, No Man's Sky's update did drop and add a lot
to that game.
Like two years later.
So yeah, it was late, but they added a lot apparently that people were happy with.
And like we're talking about Warframe, like the original version of Warframe I would describe
as a trash heap in especially compared to it now.
I haven't seen much of and anything played or what of Sea of Thieves.
But just again, on description, like depending on how appealing those cosmetics were slash
if they made you interact with the world in a different way.
Because what I mean is like if you're like, yes, you have a large boat and you have a
small boat, do all boats move at the same speed?
I think so.
Yeah.
Okay.
There is never going to be any gameplay change no matter what you have.
A small boat versus a big boat, that would go faster than the big boat.
Does the small boat have?
Yeah.
Well, if you have every item and everything is.
I didn't have a boat on boat battle.
I was just on my boat because I didn't play it long enough.
The thing with, I have a friend of mine who was really, really upset.
Oh, sorry after you.
Well, I was going to say that remember that besides games like No Man's Sky, there's
also, you know, stuff came along like little big planet.
You know what I mean?
And obviously like things like Minecraft as well where early on you're just kind of
like, what's the point of this?
No, people figured out what the point of Minecraft was right away.
Like we didn't, but like Minecraft blew up immediately.
Kind of, yeah.
Sure, but my point is that games without necessarily like the progression thing, you
know, sometimes that like that, depending on what else is in the game, that's a,
that could be valid.
If there's people find enough interest in what's there outside of the concept of
progression or the examples.
It was Minecraft and a little big planet.
I don't think those feature level creation and level and progression, but it also had
a single player campaign with a story.
Both of those have explicit progression.
Okay.
Okay.
Then maybe not the best analogy, but that's the problem.
It's tough.
That game's lasting appeal was making the levels because the single player thing was
like fluff.
Okay.
Yeah.
Do you guys remember the destiny one beta?
No.
Okay.
So the destiny one beta came out and it was on earth, right?
And it ran for a weekend or two and everyone went, wow, that's a really cool beta.
Hope that's not everything on earth because that means that beta was a quarter of the
game and I blew through it in like four hours.
It was, that is absolutely all that was of earth and that was one quarter of the game
in the beta, right?
And it was very disappointing and that bummed me out, right?
I have a friend of mine who's very into Steve Thieves and following the beta and all that
and he's like, the beta that they put out, people did the same thing like, wow, this
is a cool beta.
I wonder how much is in the full game.
What you saw in the beta, the beta was the full game.
Hmm.
For online stability, I guess.
Yeah.
That is the game.
And even then, I played it a couple of days after it came out.
Well, I mean, it's an online thing, of course, it's going to have problems, but a lot of
people had problems.
And I think Rare put on Metro Saint.
A million players, thanks so much.
And now I'm seeing everyone's like, no one's playing.
Uh-oh.
But that's, I saw two or three people say no one's.
I can't find a lot of people.
Even if the game is fantastic, like that's the ultimate kiss of death, especially since
you said the most fun you had was like hanging out with people doing dumb shit.
Yeah.
Just goofing around.
Go play a game of lawbreakers right now.
It's a bunch of YouTubers, basically.
Yeah.
So aside from that, I also played.
The description of the online game where no one's on, but people try to make goofy YouTube
videos.
So everyone's just jumping around and acting like a jackass.
Remember, it was Tony Hawk Pro Skater Five, where we're like, who the fuck are those
people?
It's other YouTubers.
Other people trying to make the same video.
I also played some of Hokuto ga Gotoku, which means like a dragon.
No.
Like a fist.
Oh, but dragon.
Like a north star, like a north star dragon fist.
Anyway, that's, that's the fist of the north star.
You imported that.
Yep.
Wow.
Made by Yucuzzi teams.
I played about two hours of it.
I hit the wall at about 30 minutes where characters are all just standing in front of a gate and
can cheer out.
And I'm just walking around and I'm talking to people and a guy just says a bunch of things
and a bunch of numbers come up.
And I'm like, I didn't think I'd hit a wall and a fist of the north star game.
It's because it's it uses the Yucuzzi style side mission thing.
And basically after a bunch of button pushing, because the game had just just come out in
Japan.
So like, it's not like this game had been on Japan for months, so I couldn't find a guy
to confront online video.
That guy who used to make those guides, his name was Patrick.
Basically, it was you need to barter for different food.
And I'm like, that makes sense.
If it's the north star, what here's this money?
You mean this meaningless paper that I can't eat?
So it was basically a dog is tired and hungry and it all stems upon Kenshiro getting this
dog happy again.
Save the puppy.
So punch people in the face, but then do this and a green light comes out, which means
healing.
OK, so you heal people, they give you jerky, they give you shit.
And then you finally exchange it all to this guy gives you enough money to he gives you
enough to exchange back for a premium can of dog food.
And then you just talk to a woman and they look down and the dog is just standing up right
and happy now.
And then a bunch of guys come in and they go, they throw you into a jail cell, then
I'm fighting a guy that's about 45 feet tall.
That's right.
Yeah.
And I'm like, OK, it was a bad fight.
It was not good.
It was hammer his feet until he falls over.
Yes.
Not.
And I was a little disappointed.
The actual fighting is good, but it's a lot of watching cinematics more so than even
Yakuza's really because it was a lot of.
Because the screen so much for every single time.
And that's the fastest way to kill guys.
So it's a lot of pausing.
I think the game might have asked me, do you want these cut scenes to be here?
But you don't know.
I didn't know.
How would you ever know when I beat the guy, a woman, which you don't see too often in
Fist of North Star Things or Mad Max.
Yeah.
With a cool design who seems to be the boss of the arena is like, oh, kid.
And everyone's like, yeah.
And then out of frame, she pulls in this like gigantic like cigar and goes when I was like,
wow, amazing.
I got a little bit bit basled.
I finally got into the town where goofy shit happens.
You got into Hokuto no Kamurocho.
Eden.
Yeah.
Eden.
So that's where I found some places to play darts.
There's a casino, which I would imagine Kenshiro was brain would blow up at a Kenshiro.
He's like, you don't fight.
What do you do here?
Where's the tux?
You mix any drinks?
I didn't find any of that stuff yet, but that was a good time.
Fucking suit.
That was a good time.
It still has no absolutely no announcement of a localization at all, which I was a little
complex.
I always think you should probably announce it.
You should announce that you're not going to do it.
That to be fair, they're bringing out the Yakuza's faster and faster.
They are.
So we're catching up now instead of just treading water.
That's true.
And the next season at Taras House came out.
Damn.
I'm not into it that much.
It's in Nagano, so it's in a forest with snow everywhere.
One of the girls that shows up is a hockey team captain.
Her name is Tsubasa.
So they all call her Captain Tsubasa, which is amazing.
And there's like a little shit running around who sucks.
His parents come to visit him and they say, you suck and you're a disappointment.
You say you want to be independent.
You spent $500 on your dad's credit card yesterday buying expensive brands that everyone chastises
them over.
This is the most Japanese thing ever.
You say you have dreams.
Oh, man.
But of being independent, but you are using your dad's credit card.
Which is it?
Yaida?
There's something.
And he's like, I just want to be independent.
And that's that character.
There's something about the phrasing of there's some little shit running around who sucks.
But after you've seen the exaggerated extremes 211 that is Jersey Shore, going back to the
subtleties.
It's an amazing contrast.
Dude, it's like baking in the sun, then jumping in the water.
The subtleties.
Can you truly appreciate them?
Jersey's days are coming back too.
The new season starts where they all have kids and shit.
They're clearly, clearly needs to be a crossover.
There would be the most no sex.
Teras cross macaroni rascals.
Yeah.
And then that's me for the week.
Oh, cool.
I want that crossover so bad.
I want it real bad.
I forgot about macaroni rascals.
Just for the name.
Oh, man.
Just for the name.
I told Willie this, but rascals was actually the nicest way that they localized it.
Because the character for rascals can mean shit lord and bastard.
But they're like, let's call it rascals.
Macaroni fuckers.
It was like people we don't want around us.
Yeah.
Yeah.
If you will.
Rouse the boats.
What about you?
What's happening with in Woolly Town?
Well, let me see here.
If there's an ad read.
There sure is.
That's what's going on in Woolly Town.
Yep.
Let's take a quick word from our sponsors.
Let's do that.
Okay.
Brought to us by macaroni rascals in new season.
Catch it in Japan.
No, no, no, no, no.
This week, the friendcast is sponsored by take your time.
Take your time.
Talking to us.
Nope.
Nope.
Talking to the website.
Talking to the little spinning you're looking at.
Little spinning.
Little spinning.
Brought to us by spinning logo.
This week, this podcast is sponsored by Acer.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
They make computers.
Yep.
They make computers to let you game longer and game harder, which is something that Matt
has always told me he wants to do.
I've I've gamed harder.
You look like you.
You want to level up your hardware.
I need to last longer.
It's not cutting it.
It's really not cutting it.
Well, you know what might help you?
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It's something called the Predator Helios 300.
Now, you're crazy.
Now, you made that up.
You should have heard this guy last week.
Dude, we talked about the Predator Helios 300 last week.
I absolutely lost my mind.
Thanks to an aeroplane 3D fan.
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Okay.
The only heat you feel comes from the battlefield, Matt.
Now, the problem is that I like a laptop that gets real hot because kiddies will walk around
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You want to stay cool and calm under fire.
That's true.
When I'm when I'm playing my FPS and you want a sleek design that lets you forget it's
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You want a seventh gen Intel Core i7 processor.
I got one of those.
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So you want to head on down to Acer.com.
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So the offer was valid through April 30th, 2018.
I hope it comes with a mouse called the flash blade and limited to one per qualified order.
Yeah.
It's only for you.
That's pretty cool.
That's a fun sponsor.
Thank you Acer.
Thank you Acer.
Thank you Acer.
The podcast is also sponsored by spinning logo.
A loading screen.
This week we're sponsored by Away.
Away?
Away.
Away is a luggage company.
Okay.
We like traveling.
You and I, maybe not all of us.
Some of us do a little bit.
Hey listen, I'm not the biggest fan of traveling.
Yeah.
But if I'm going to travel somewhere, the last thing I need is I had my luggage fall apart
on me.
There you go.
That was the absolute worst thing that happened.
Matt, you and I, do we know what it's like in the airports?
I know it's like when United has every single time lost my luggage.
Well, I'll tell you what.
When you want to just, when you're in the airport hanging out, what matters more than
your luggage, the thing that's with you the whole time?
I'm happy when my luggage has crushed a child's luggage in the roundabout thing.
I'm not necessarily looking for that.
I kind of just, I want my stuff to be like, I want my wheels to be a decent quality that
it's not, you know, dragging to the left as I'm walking to the right.
That's the worst.
I always start getting my luggage from that place down at the mall and my wheel always
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Did you say 400 and 360 degree?
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Oh, I was like, it spins 4,000 degrees?
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Now here's the thing.
Here's the thing with this thing.
What is the thing?
Because I got one.
There need to be more.
Oh yeah, I got one.
Oh yeah?
And boy, is there more.
What is it?
Okay.
A USB battery pack charger in the carry-on case.
I've seen this in things.
And I did not believe it.
When you wheel up to the gate and you're not sitting next to the outlet because everyone's
crowded around it with their laptop or even worse, there's the outlet but there's nothing
near the outlet.
So you just stay there like a second.
Take the seat you want and plug your phone in to your actual carry-on.
It's got a charge in it.
The battery can charge up your iPhone five times.
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Oh, do you mind if I?
Oh, well.
You're in an airport.
Okay, if only for a little bit.
Which means rudeness has to be low.
Yes.
It's like...
I do respect a guy that would walk to one of those outlet towers and just unplug everyone's
and just put his in.
Yeah.
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Why would you do something so ballsy?
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It's got a battery charger in it.
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Thanks away.
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We're living in the future.
Thank you.
All right.
And so with that, I did have a week.
Yeah.
It was not a particularly long one.
You'd be sick if you're like, I have missing time this week, I don't know.
I have that.
It doesn't hurt.
What happened?
I bet you have it too.
I woke up here.
It does happen from time to time.
Once a week guaranteed, I get here and have a minor little panic freak out because I can't
remember leaving my house at all and thus become.
There's a difference between being forgetful and having missing time.
And then I become convinced not that I left my door unlocked, but somehow that I left
my door completely open.
Okay.
And I text my neighbor so that she can go over and check.
I don't have that as much as I have days where everything is on autopilot because it's so
back to back with no breaks in between.
That when I get to the end of it, I kind of just don't know where I am a little bit.
So for example, today will be one of those days because today is like, right?
It's got big Mondays.
So like, you know, no secret, but like the docket is like, I used to put it together
as the week went on and I found it a lot easier to wait for the collective news buildup and
then put it and then do it towards the end because you do it all week, you're like, okay,
that story sucks.
This new story is much better and it's just a waste of effort.
So, you know, so, you know, there's some time spent on that and then, you know, it's come
in, do this and then immediately after this, it's straight to Haka, right?
Or it would be the gym.
And then immediately after that, it's back home and then edit and then that's straight
to Haka straight to Haka.
No, no, no, no, no, he's thinking about Prince of Persia again.
Okay, you can't stop him.
Well, he should have died that night.
And you know, and then at some point it hit at some point you get 1130 and then you're
just like, what was this day?
You know, Monday, that's what it's like.
Yeah.
And you just, but you just like, you're just like lost in this autopilot because like,
like I said, like at some point, something went in your body to keep you alive.
But otherwise it was just autopilot.
It's a bit weird and it's not a great feeling, but it is, it is worth it when the results,
you know, show.
You know, with the ultimate, oh man, just laughing at my own poor, horrible expense.
You know, with the ultimate version of that door lock story was, that scenario happened
to me leaving the Airbnb coming home from Japan, in which the Airbnb is make sure to
fucking lock the door with this complicated lock shit, but because we had to leave so
early in the morning, I'm like in the airport and like, I don't remember even leaving the
house.
Wow.
Oh boy.
I hope I fucking locked that door.
Well, it's one of the safest places because of the crime.
Yeah, but they can't really do anything to you though.
Chances are the neighbors saw you leave.
But my Airbnb account, the neighbor might have seen you leave shrugged and did it for
you.
That's possible.
Yeah.
Um, but no, so what I did, uh, this week, I am seven episodes into a legend of the galactic
heroes.
Oh God.
Damn it.
What is this?
Have you heard of this?
You're, are you aware of Legend of Galactic Heroes?
I can't even tell if that's an anime.
What's the problem?
What is this?
I have no backstory here.
So this is fresh.
What's coming?
What's going on?
Nah.
There's a guy.
There's a guy that I have been an acquaintance of online for like 10 years that the only
thing he has said to me in the past six is Pat, watch fucking galactic heroes.
Yeah.
And I'm like, nah, haha.
Okay.
And I've done everything I can to just like not even know what it is.
Oh really?
Out of spite.
Oh wow.
That's funny.
And now I lose.
Yeah, you do.
Because you're about to talk.
I'm about to tell you what.
I've never heard of this.
It's an old show and I've heard about it for a long time and it's always been hearing
about it in context of quality and oldness.
It's really good, but it's really old, right?
And it's generally considered this like just airtight, almost flawless space opera.
That's all it really is.
Is it live action?
Is it an anime?
It's an anime.
Oh, it's big anime.
And it's space and it's war and it's Dreadnaughts and it's politics.
Now did you watch the new one or the old one?
I'm starting in the old one.
I'm watching the old one.
How old is it?
That's a good question.
It's quite old.
It looks like Gundam.
Let's check out the year.
Like I want to say 70s.
1999.
Let's look at the galactic heroes.
Let's see if we can find a year on this.
1988.
Okay.
Yeah.
Wrong again.
Still old though.
So old enough, old enough.
And so anyway, it was just apropos of nothing because it's always been, like I said, something
I've been recommended for a while and I was like, you know, I've always wanted to get
around to this.
How long is it?
You said you were seven in.
Yeah, it's a long series.
I think it might hit 100.
And then there's a new one too.
Yeah, there's essentially just remaking it.
I don't know if it's a film or if it's, I don't know what the new thing is to be perfectly
honest.
But guess what?
Yeah, it's good.
Yeah.
It's quite good.
Is it in the style?
What would you compare it to?
It reminds me of, it reminds me of double 83.
It reminds me a bit of, yeah, I'd say I'd put it up there.
Wow.
I'd compare it to double 83.
I would compare it to maybe war in the pocket a little bit.
More than some of the other series.
So I'm going to dumb it down for me.
You're comparing it to Gundam.
Yeah.
It feels kind of like Gundam.
But specific ones.
Yeah.
Specific.
Not Gundam in general.
Now it ships, right?
It's not Robo.
It ships.
And then here's the thing is that it's based on a novel series and a light novel like
the Sword Art.
I think it's full novels.
I think so.
Like with words.
But I'm taking guesses because I'm not 100% sure.
I mean, if the content is that long and it's been adapted into a manga as well and all
this stuff, I have to assume it's just a bunch of them.
But no, it's just a really well done, straight up like this is war in space with politics
and ships doing their things.
And it's hard to describe any like stand out like holy shit so far because it's the most
vanilla anime in that way.
And it's very, very classical.
The intro, the outro, the voice acting.
You're in prime classical territory there.
It's incredibly classical.
But I have a question.
Since it's from the olden days.
It's called Galactic Heroes.
I know what it looks like.
Legend of the Galactic Heroes.
It looks very much of the anime of that time.
Oh yeah, for sure.
It looks like 80's anime.
Yeah.
What is the level of disproportionate, horrific violence?
Yeah, some to 88.
It could be a lot.
We got some.
Yeah.
We got some in there.
There's an example is there's a point where this squadron infiltrates like an enemy base
and they deploy a type of gas that basically is.
What does it do?
It's a type of gas.
It's going to be bad.
It's going to be real bad.
It's like if you fire your gun or your weapon, it ignites the entire area that the gun is
fired in.
Sure.
So you know the powder from.
Might as well just be propane.
Well, the powder from the order, it's like that, right?
So you just fill the room with that so that you basically go, if you shoot at me, we're
all dead, right?
And then they go, fuck, we can't shoot at them.
And then they go, yeah, you can't.
And then they pull out axes, swords and melee weapons and hack the enemy apart.
Like it would be your stand.
You would carry around your boxing gloves and go, guns, don't work around.
We got to do this.
We got to do it.
Dual style.
Yeah.
But the differences is that they weren't able, they, they weren't prepared for that.
You know, and the other team, you know, you start shooting your gun, just go, fuck
it.
Well, I'd rather fucking blow up than get hacked to death with an axe.
What is that?
When I put in legends of, of course, the first thing that popped up in Google was Guardians
of Gaul.
Gaul.
Yeah, man, it's just an old, good anime, not much to say about it, besides like quality.
Oh, that's good.
And we've got, we've got crying princesses.
Yes, you do.
We've got snotty little children and we've got like, we've got, you know, brash young
up starts with their military hats, like kind of slightly, you know, the fun stuff.
It's all that fun stuff.
Is there a weird robot mascot like Harrow?
No, good.
Nothing even really close to that.
Robots are on a thing.
Harrow is the worst.
Like the youngest, when I say like, like brash kids, I don't mean like, like Moi blobs that
are rolling around with their Harrow.
I don't mean that.
I mean, literally, like the youngest child we've seen is like this kid that's about 14.
And occasionally he says something pretty naive, but he's a pretty good cook and he
makes nice tea.
You know what I mean?
Like, no, it's, it's very, very like calm with that bullshit.
At no point do you feel like you're trying to sell you a toy.
Okay.
This is very important to note.
I like watching original Gundam and it's like, look at the transforming sequence again, fuckers.
The most difficult thing is, is trying to get used to about 40 German names being thrown
at you in two episodes.
And parsing them.
Parsing through all of them.
Yeah.
Every single German name you can think of gets thrown at you and you're like, yeah.
Gunner is Gunner in there.
That's my favorite.
Oh God, man.
It's, there's a lot.
Magnus.
Siegfried and, and Orwell and, and, and Weiss and, it's, it's a lot of right.
What about Frabao?
What about Frabao?
Frabao.
No, no, they're using real names.
I'm never going to laugh more than I laugh.
Klaus Hansen.
Frabao.
Yeah.
Um, it's good stuff.
It's good stuff.
Is a game of thrones in space?
No.
Okay.
Thank you.
No, it's not.
Good.
Um, there is, there's no Gundams, but there's Doom weapons though.
What the fuck is that?
This is a really good weapon.
Oh, you know how there's a Doom weapon in every like Gundam series that you have to like
stop at the end?
Yeah.
There's the giant space laser.
Oh, that's the thing that they made that is actually a bigger problem.
The giant space laser.
The giant space laser.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That, that exists.
The satellites and orbital cannons are totally.
Yeah.
Yeah.
For sure.
Um, so yeah, I watched some of that and I played, um, some more of Kirby Star Allies.
Of course you did.
I downloaded it.
I hadn't started it yet.
Fan.
I hear the first hour is like amazing.
Fucking tech.
Dude.
So, okay, here's, here's the thing about Kirby, right?
He sucks.
Why does he suck?
Because he sucks.
No, he gets his power.
Stomass.
Why you gotta be so defensive?
Because there's got him, you know, I, because there's a huge misunderstanding out there
about what the Kirby games are.
And we touched on it a little bit last time because what are Kirby games?
Easy, they're easy, charming, and then done, right?
But no, because when you beat them, the real game begins and a lot of the time there's
plot and story that goes into the new game plus and so there's this whole thing and you're
like, I'm gonna make fun of me all you want on this one.
What?
But it's been happening.
What?
Is that ever since Kirby Super Star Ultra, there's been an attempt at creating a cannon
here, right?
Yeah.
There's been an attempt and this comes from when you, when you're fighting certain bosses,
you see the descriptions of them on the pause screen and sometimes they say things, right?
And it's really fucking interesting how this goes places sometimes.
Some things that the Kirby series can learn from Dark Souls.
Sure.
And so your Kirby Triple Deluxe starts to bring things together and to a type of universe
and planet Robobot directly references pretty much every past game.
Well, I'm aware that Meta Knight and Kirby are fucking weird alien warriors.
There's also a tragic like where does the anime fit in?
There's a tragic subplot to Planet Robobot and in terms of like the truth behind its
villains, that's really interesting as well.
And like not, and kind of like, like it's a spoiler if I talk about it.
Oh yeah.
I think, Woollie, maybe, maybe, maybe you can get out ahead of it and become the Vati
Vigia of Kirby games and get prepared to cry Kirby, maybe.
Prepare to suck.
Oh my God.
There it is.
There's, there's your gold idea right there.
Prepare to suck.
There's your video.
Same somber way too.
What I want to, what I want to find and what I want to, to, to give you a Kirby of Lothric
is I want to give you the description of one of the Kirby enemies to fight at the end.
Hit me with it.
And well, the problem is I have to, I have to find it.
Oh, you haven't ready?
Okay.
It's a, it's a potted plant with a hat.
He's very happy.
It's not going to be that.
Woollie wouldn't bring this up if it wasn't going to be fucked up somewhere.
Yes.
This is why I had to get there fast.
Okay.
I want to play that with you.
We should do something with that.
Dude.
It's like, like the, the, the, the stuff.
And you're playing in single player.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So the, the, the, the, the, I know I actually, I played it with my girl and then I played
it a bit single as well.
So I'm doing, doing both.
Yeah.
Cause she was like, I can't play another hour of this fucking game Woollie.
I'm dying.
It's been 50 hours and I please stop playing Kirby.
No.
The, the really, what's really awesome about like Star Allies is, I guess, the friendship
train is there.
And they bring back the combination that is nefarious sounding.
It's not.
You, there's a friend.
We support each other.
There's a friend.
We'll power up.
We're all four of you hold hands and you just fucking roll around and fucking destroy
everything as a giant.
Just the friendship.
You're a giant power catamari.
Why do you have to go there?
Um, it's, it's great.
It's great.
You have the combinations of every power you get and you get all, you're bringing back
people from previous games.
Yeah.
Like fucking Rick.
Rick is going to be in there as DLC.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The three buddies from Dreamland 3.
Marks is there and all this other stuff.
Rick and kind and cool.
Um, fucking love Rick.
He's like my favorite underrated Nintendo character.
Uh, the, the, the, okay.
So the, what the fuck was Rick?
What is it?
I'm going to have to find it.
I'm going to have to find it while we're talking about something.
That's unfortunate.
Oh, whoa.
But PlayStation happened, but no, it's an incredible, yeah, it's an incredible like fucking Kirby
game.
The moment you get the lore.
How are you going to start your lore channel?
You can't even remember one lore.
The description is important.
The description is important.
Yeah.
Just remember one.
What's the name of the character?
Maybe someone can find it for you.
It's queen sex, sectonia, but like I need to, I need to.
Queen sex.
Tonya.
Yeah.
Um, she's got the germies real bad.
Yeah.
She runs the friendship train with their germies, uh, the, what should I call it?
The actual way the game, uh, is homaging previous Kirby games is really cool and each
level like has the different way that you're moving around on the map when you get to pop
star, you're floating around on the actual, uh, uh, like you're, you're floating around
on your star.
Whereas before you were on foot and this one doesn't have like a central gimmick like
Robobot or like central gimmick here is you throw a star at any absorbable enemy.
Yeah.
And then it becomes your, uh, buddy.
Okay.
It becomes your friend.
Right.
So, and then you get one, then you get a buddy following you around and you can do that up
to four times.
So you can have four unique powered buddies that basically become your, um, your allies.
Okay.
That's why you can have up to four players.
I have a question for you.
So everyone can get their own buddy or they, they're all buddies when there's four players
that each one is controlling a buddy together.
They only get one each.
Well, you're, you're, no, you're, can, yeah, you're all controlling the, you're controlling
Kirby's player one.
Yeah.
And each one is another player.
Okay.
Or you get the, the AI.
Uh, I have a question for you, Willie.
Yes.
How do you feel about, uh, the complaints that, uh, Kirby is a giant fetishized war monster
aimed at children?
Um, I think, I don't think that's what Sakura had in mind.
I think that's like going back to before the furry movement and calling anthropomorphic
animals furries.
You know, it's like, I don't think that's what you're deflecting the question.
No, I'm saying, I'm saying in the future, anything that you think is cool now might
become a creepy sex thing doesn't change the past.
Yeah.
I don't know.
You go back and look at those anthropomorphized animals.
They look like creepy sex things even back then.
Yeah.
But no one thought it then or they didn't like speak up publicly and like, I can give
a speech about it because there was no internet.
Maybe they did.
It's just on a street corner somewhere.
Maybe, but that's, you know, unknowable knowledge.
It's, it's like, like things, do things get creepy like over time after the fetish gets
created later?
Absolutely.
That's some bullshit.
That's why everyone needs to cover their goddamn feet.
That's, that's some bullshit.
It can, but it's not an iron rule.
Yeah.
I'll believe it.
I'll be with that.
Yeah.
So yeah.
Kirby's a Vaughan monster now that we know what Vaughan is.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, let me, let me, because when I was a kid, I did find it kind of horrific that
this cute little animal was just swallowing sentient people whole.
I didn't.
It's creepy now, but I didn't think it was creepy then.
I thought it was a little weird.
And the other thing too is that like he, but it's such a video game power and, and like,
you know, like he also spits them out and they kind of just become stars really.
Like he absorbs the power and then they go flying out of him as a star.
I think like every creature in Kirby is magically, they don't have guts and shit.
So it just, everything just gets turned into energy.
It's, you know, it's not even that, it's not even that bad.
It's not that bad.
It's not even that bad.
There was a Kirby game in which when you, when you ate them, like Kirby got bigger and
you could see the distended stuff.
Okay.
Dude.
I want to, I want to feel that like maybe Epic Yarn had something like that.
It's bad enough that we're getting all these photoshoppeds of him with full feet.
Oh, did you see the one with him with a human mouth?
That one's real bad too.
I have not.
I have not.
Have you given up on looking for that, that lore?
No, he's afraid he's just going down the Kirby foothold.
Oh, no, I'm staying here.
Bookmarks are fast.
I'm strolling.
Kirby triple deluxe pause screen description.
I thought I thought I was Star Allies.
Don't worry about it.
He's talking about Lauren.
No, the description I was looking for.
Okay.
Taranza's final words and offering can no longer reach her ears.
The former queen has become a pitiable husk in the throes of madness after losing everything.
She has consumed the world and all she has left to cling to is her vanity.
Yeah, that's a Dark Souls.
This is Kirby.
That's in triple deluxe.
Right.
That's a Dark Souls.
Kirby, the final boss of Dreamland three is zero.
The big eyeball with a thing when you beat its floating form,
the eye that is attacking you explodes out of its body
and bleeds on screen for a while before it dies.
It literally pops and is a red.
It's red off and blood explodes out of it as it comes as it comes for you.
And then Kirby goes and eats it.
Mark does the dance.
Marks and it gets a fucking explosion.
I'm going to look here.
I'm going to pull this up for you.
Fuck.
I'm going to pull this up to see the podcast video.
Kirby for just play this because
like straight up the fucking the fucking final fight, right?
I can't see it.
The final fight with with with.
Look, there's Rick.
Which one's Rick?
He's a little hamster that shoots fireballs at him.
Oh, yeah.
OK. OK.
So the final fight against.
Oh, we're just skipped to the power of the thing.
Kirby Dreamland three, you're fighting this big floating.
You're fighting zero, right?
OK, it's a big eyeball.
And then at a certain point you do enough damage
and then Kirby's going to kill the eyeball.
And then he becomes a second form.
Yeah, it's a bigger eyeball.
And that happened.
I see blood there.
Basically, OK, the set, the first
the red eyeball rips out of the body.
Try on and it bleeds at you for a minute.
And like, you know, it's like it's the Kirby true bosses.
I think they're going for that.
It's red energy, but it also just looks like blood.
I mean, it's a it's a convenient way to get around the SRB
when zero two shows up and has the leaking tear of blood.
Because that's bailed shit at that point.
Like, I hear you, but like, look, there's a leaking bloody eyeball
tear coming from me. OK, like, what do you want to interpret that as?
You all right, you know what I mean?
You found it there.
When you when you blow up marks at the end of Kirby,
fucking superstar registered hypercam, and he does a scream
as he splits in half, it's fucking it's kind of creepy.
It's all and they always and these things are always just like Kirby
has always been kind of creepy and they're after the first play
through a lot of the times.
So anyway, only the hardcore Kirby playing adults can see this day.
Shit, the kids get to enjoy the easy adventure.
And then after that, the hard modes like have some cool shit in them.
And they're like, I said, there's a reason why the series is so like
fucking airtight and solid. How's trying to do something crazy?
And so and it seems like a lot of that might a lot of that lore stuff.
I'm excited to see where it goes in in the new game, because.
There might be a denouement to their build up.
And but really how people feel when I start to talk about Dark Souls lore.
Is that what this feels like?
Oh, man, dude.
And I'm like, I don't care about your stupid marshmallow.
It's a true story of the characters.
Oh, fuck you. Oh, my God, fucking.
I need to play more.
I only play like an hour of it.
The first playthrough is great.
This sounds like you fucking finding secret codes in the backgrounds of SpongeBob.
But they're not secret.
It's literally just playing the game a second time after you beat it the first time.
Yeah, that's a secret. That's not.
It's it's like if you want to take any of your 999s or your Yoko Taro games,
you know, where you beat it.
And then guess what?
Then you start again and then there's more for you there.
Yeah, that's not a secret.
You know what? I'm just realizing there's a shit ton of games
you've been playing lately or talking about lately in which someone says,
oh, yeah, I beat it.
And then somebody says, so you finished the tutorial.
Oh, so you started, huh? Yeah, yeah.
So now Star Allies is one back to back to back.
And now Star Allies is the next one.
Every Kirby game, every Kirby game. The new Kirby Star Allies starts here.
Because the reason and the thing is that the reason why it's interesting
in that like the entire Kirby series is kind of a pump fake, right?
A little bit.
They're always games for kids that are very easy.
But the the the challenges you get after beating them are usually quite difficult.
The boss butchers and like the the the boss rush.
OK, like it was called boss butch in the original, right?
The the you know, the Coliseum modes and things like that are actually,
you know what I mean? They give you a run for your money.
The only Kirby game I've played through all the way is the first one,
which I don't think had any of that stuff. It was just.
Yeah, I mean the next game like and I think the most overt
this this mechanic has been was with when Super Star first came out
because you get to a title screen that shows you a million modes
that you don't have and things. Yeah.
And you specifically you beat a very short little adventure.
Isn't it like the next one?
Isn't it just there's nothing there?
Yeah. And then the panel gets added.
Milky Way wishes.
And then you get a whole other title.
Yeah, Dinoblade and you know, you get you get each of these
like logos showing up right there.
And in some of the other games, it's a bit more subtle, like, you know,
like you get them the Meta Knightmare in the newer ones and stuff.
The other weird thing is I serve people talking like, well,
there's fucking Kirby games released all the time.
The last console Kirby was like on the Wii, like that four player one.
There was just like the subtitle was like Dreamland something.
Yeah. Well, that's the last time.
Return to Dreamland, which had four players.
And that was it.
So now that we have a switch, which is a console and a handheld,
we get to put a higher quality Kirby game into right into rotation.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, I said console and switch, which I'm happy for.
Because quite frankly, the biggest problem with with Triple Deluxe
and Robobot is is just the fact that they're on consoles
that you guys might not want to play.
Yeah. And they're fucking great games.
So I don't want to play my 3DS now that a switch exists.
Yeah. Well, here's the thing.
Hey, Triple Deluxe has like, you know, some has some fun, cool stuff in it.
That's worth it if you're a fan.
I played like almost zero of it.
Played like Robobot is a unique game
that you're not going to get that experience from start to start life.
And then I got a question for you.
You weren't here when it came up because but the Nintendo Direct, like.
It was you were.
Fuck, did we already talk about this?
I fucking got all hyped up on it.
Yeah, I remember you got hyped up.
So I remember talking to you about it.
It's like, how do you feel about stuff?
Like, how do you feel about the 3DS continue?
The first thing you said was like, I sure hate it.
Fuck, that whole conversation is gone.
Well, there is missing time.
No, shit.
I'm like, I'm like, I said, like, if it still continues to get bought,
the 3DS, like, support it, put games on it.
But don't put the games I really want.
Yeah, that's the takeaway of it.
Really, you know, like, I just want to go out into the world
and smash everyone's 3DS and everyone and everyone who's like,
Hey, man, I haven't bought a switch.
I don't have that kind of money yet.
Is kind of being like, well, if you bought less 3DS games,
you'd get a switch much faster.
Yeah, yeah.
It's not. It's it's it's honestly, it's a very like, yeah,
I support this thing existing.
Just don't put the things I care about there.
It's such a douchey move.
It's it's that's the call.
That's the handheld for losers now.
Yeah, but at the end of the day, I'll get something I really want.
I'll still like, when that 80s overdrive racing game came out,
I found my 3DS wherever it was.
Lucky Monster Hunter moved.
Yeah, lucky.
I would have played it no matter where the fuck it was.
There you go.
I would have just been miserable.
That's what I mean.
You just would have been sitting there grumbling.
You missed out of the 3DS.
Yeah, and I played and I played Samus Returns.
Dude, you never you never had to do it and you have big hands.
So it would have been really bad for you.
That that game is painful for long periods.
It might have actually been like a prohibitor.
Yeah, probably.
Depending on on how much was required.
But in any case, the I can feel I can almost hear the the
the level of excitement and how much I like Kirby is creating
an antagonistic little like a little your birth in a creature.
It's just a seed being planted for you to just be like, man, fuck Kirby games.
Yeah, but yeah, but I can feel the creation.
Wow, you know me really well.
I can feel it.
Oh, yeah, turn that beeping shit off.
I can't.
It's because it's because OBS is coming back.
It's disconnected and it's reconnected.
But it's an automated process.
I could do nothing.
Well, you actually know me extraordinarily well in that you can feel that happening.
Now, I in my older age, I've learned to contain it somewhat.
So I'm just going to throw out some snide little shitty pot shots now and then
about your baby game for idiots.
I like Kirby games.
I like Kirby games.
That's what bugs me.
It's just how much woolly likes them makes me not like that's the exact exact.
I can tell you just it's so clear.
Because it's like for it is so genuine and childlike that it makes me piss.
It's a dreamland was really fun.
It's so clear when it's happening because I can see it in his face.
I can hear it in his voice.
Also, and every single follow up comment, but, you know, there's a specific thing
where you talk about Kirby Superstar and I want to support you really.
When you have a super star, I'm like, you can do it.
Like talk like that's not my favorite game of all time.
But I know it's you know, how a bunch of it.
Well, you know how we like, you know, you say like, there's it's the last of the
OG hustlers, Kirby is like the last of the pure.
You know what I mean?
Like it's the last of like just the old school, but almost no bad games in its franchise.
It's it's nothing outright shit.
Lightless, you know, I personally am not the biggest Kirby fan.
I appreciate them.
But more than anything, I am awestruck at its run.
Yeah. And and and it's OK knowing your nature that you you shirk from the light
into the dark, the dark gets more appealing.
Air Ride is the worst reviewed one.
And even then, I think at the time it was like reviewed harshly.
Of course, now there's a skill ceiling on that because you know, the fiend at it.
I hey, man, I am aware I'm aware this is what I've created.
And I'm OK with it.
Take your shots.
Nothing you say will hurt that franchise.
It's fucking that it's it also comes from a different place.
And it's a place of like, I wish I liked it more.
You would never spend the money to bother going playing back back through these
unless there's like a new one that was super interesting.
Well, no, it's because my core problems with that game are like trivia.
They're there for me.
They're like, I don't like the way Kirby jumps and moves.
Oh, the base.
So it's like what and like, I can appreciate everything that it does.
But it's like, I don't like the feel of controlling Kirby ever.
And that's that's Kirby.
That is that's the most Kirby jumps in a robot.
Then you get ride armor from Mega Man X.
Yes, I remember that, which feels great.
Yeah, but it's like, I don't like basic.
So I see all this cool stuff and this is that.
And so that creates this thing of of like people that fucking stupid marshmallow
and then and then Willie's like basically playing with a little Kirby action figures
to go like, yay, I'm having fun.
And I'm like, I don't like that you're having fun with something that I can't
have fun with.
So I hate it and I hate you.
So much fun.
Anyway, that was pretty much my week.
Do the Kirby sucks.
So what we got?
Yeah, he certainly does.
Yeah, all right, he does.
Sucks all the good reviews in all the time.
He always has.
And doesn't it look really good to Star Allies?
It looks better than any other Kirby game to this point.
Yeah, it looks great.
Looks fantastic.
And I like that it's the polish that like Mario Odyssey got.
And I like that now American and Japanese Kirby exist in the same game
as a difficulty slider.
Sure.
You can turn it from Japanese Kirby into American.
We moved on to the happening.
We moved on to the happening.
Is the angry Kirby a thing in there?
I didn't see it.
Oh, yeah.
Well, at some point when you there's some mode that you unlock that you have a
Kid Icarus style difficulty slider and he gets more and he's putting hot sauce on.
And so like the easiest difficulty is happy Kirby.
Yeah, with just some curry.
And then every difficulty up is he's tipping the bottle.
Yeah, OK, that's that's a Sakurai.
So Kid Icarus is the same thing.
Exactly.
Like every time there's one more extra drop, his eyebrows go from
like pointing straight up to like just twisting a little bit down once.
That is awesome.
That's best.
And then he becomes nightmare Kirby on the highest difficulty.
Yeah, like nightmare Geese.
But but no, like the last thing I was going to say on it is like so like that
description, for example, of the the the the boss in Triple Deluxe is something
that is an example of what you would get with some of the characters on their
item descriptions in New Game Plus and things like that.
Weird.
Yeah, that it's entirely regulated towards the second.
And that is not for children.
Like that type of description game.
The game should be like in your age, like an age lock appears.
You may not play this unless you are not a children.
So our children leave the room.
Speaking of the switch, there's a cool little little
Hori thing that's coming out.
Oh, there's a Hori thing.
Yeah, it's a switch joy con with a hat on it.
Fucking that.
That was amazing.
That's some action.
Yeah. Yeah.
Now, that's just a joy con with it.
Like it's just straight up.
It's not like a skin that you know, or he's making a joy con complete
see with a deep ad on it.
That's cool in theory.
But it's like that we're talking about something else that bit.
I'd rather use the default joy con thing if that's a shitty deep ad.
I don't value the shape.
If it's a bad deep ad, the four buttons are inferior to no, no.
So this this this joy con is interesting because it has a good deep ad,
but it has two very significant drawbacks.
Are you familiar with them guys?
It's made by Hori.
No, Hori makes good stuff.
I mean, you can't get rid of the fact that I was taking a guess in the center
and you definitely can't rid of the fact that, like, it's a stick in a deep ad
on one side, the button there is very close to the deep.
So that when you play two players with this, you'd have to use the deep ad as
your but why would you play that?
Well, luckily, you can't play two players with this because it doesn't work
outside of handheld mode and it has no rumble.
OK, well, to be fair, it's not the type of accessory you'd want to use with two people.
Yeah, you know, but like the instant you pop that out, stops working.
OK, OK, that that.
Yeah, it would be a very expensive accessory.
Otherwise, yeah, it would be more than just a controller, right?
Like you'd have to it's it's especially for people that like I just wanted
a deep ad and I don't care about anything else that that makes sense.
Oh, I desperately need a deep ad.
I need it on the go. That makes sense.
It's really close to the snapshot button.
Yeah, because it does have a sync button.
That's why it does.
It does have rumble.
Here's what's missing.
Here's what's missing.
H.D. Rumble Player LED sync button, SL button, S.R. button,
accelerometer and gyro sensors.
All right, what's two thousand four hundred and eighty yen?
That's like thirty bucks.
I know, not thirty dollars.
Well, look, say thirty dollars.
I've never trusted you. Look, look, Matt, it's easy.
So bad at it.
Take, take, take the the you go.
You take the number. Yeah.
And then you just go last two digits or sense.
And then you're and then you throw it up and roll it up a little bit.
A little bit. OK. Yeah.
So, yes. See, I do that.
That's what I do.
I think when the numbers get too high, you get to do the war frame math
for platinum is so fucking confusing.
One platinum is six point seven cents.
Third dollars. Yeah, very good.
Six point seven cents. That's confusing.
What? Yeah. What?
One plat in a war frame is six point seven cents.
Also, the big numbers make you think you have a lot. Got it.
It's weird. Yeah. Yeah.
I wonder if anyone would ever do that the other way, where it's like ten dollars
is one point or a hundred dollars is one point.
That did happen. It's very popular.
What it's called cryptocurrency.
But in a video game, where it is a video game.
Hey, well, because it's fake money for idiots.
Yes, if you have a bitcoin, just give me a bitcoin.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
The idiots, the idiots that got rich.
I'll take your stupid fake money off you so that you don't have to worry about it.
Um, all right.
Fucking hate Matt.
You sent me this podcast story last week and I said, no, no,
we're discussing this when you get back.
These terrifying robot wolves
now prowl farms in Japan to keep bores away.
Yeah. I repeat, these terrifying robot
wolves now prowl farms in Japan to keep bores away.
I'm going to stop you right there because you had the title, right?
And we got a laugh and a reaction out of that.
Then you have the picture.
Now you have the actual designation for the wolf.
They have a name.
They've been dubbed super monster wolves and they're 100 percent real.
Yeah. OK.
Scarecrow's may do a good job keeping birds away,
but how do you control pest problems of a bigger kind?
Over in Japan, wild boars are a huge problem on farms.
Nearly a million of them exist in their feasts on chestnuts, rice
and other crops collectively in Lord of Kuto, agricultural waste.
Fast forward to this super big that created these giant robot wolves
that have motion sensors that detect when a boar is around
and they have a blood curdling howl that scares them away.
Now, apparently they're crazy effective and they're five thousand dollars.
But they don't move.
Well, no, unfortunately, but they work.
They scare them away.
That. How was that somebody's jump to a solution?
Because wolves used to scare the boars away in the past.
And now they don't exist.
But now they're extinct.
Yeah. Japanese wolves have gone extinct.
So boars are like, what is this even?
I'm just going to steer clear of that.
Well, they probably have an instinctual memory.
My instinctual memory.
Possibly. Yeah.
Yeah, I was like, that looks bad.
And also it looks like Satan.
Yes. I love that the mask is like a cheap Halloween fucking.
Oh, man, it's or something akin to it.
What a. The inventor looks so proud.
What a hero. What a hero.
Man, super monster.
World's a crazy place, isn't it?
Well, just Japan.
If you have boar problems, get a super monster wolf.
That picture, though.
That picture is the best.
That's that's the podcast.
OK, so this is on Bloody Disgusting.
Go fucking find, let's go find that fucking photo, guys,
of this super monster wolf.
Yeah, that's pretty.
Holy shit.
That's pretty good.
I like I laughed at the title, but it was the scroll down
to the fucking glowing orange eyes that really killed me.
And it's like it's real.
It's real. Yeah, it's a joke.
I appreciate it. I love that.
The hard hitting news I need.
I appreciate this.
Oh, this is this funny onion article.
What? No.
Are reddit not the onion?
I love that fucking subreddit.
It's crazy.
I thought the funnest thing you could do is read the site
of the people that think onion articles are real.
Now, if you don't know what that website is,
it's called literally unbelievable.
Right, where people are reading onion articles
and thinking they're real, which is hilarious,
but way better is things that are not onion articles
that sound like they are.
Just onion articles, yeah.
So it's a collection of what sound like onion articles,
but are not.
It's that bad and crazy.
For example, I hope is it like, like,
depressing real subjects racing to get to this thing?
Is it depressing real subjects?
Or is it just funny?
For example, Reddit, not the onion.
Oh, let's hit it.
Uh, what's a good one?
Japan's slowest roller coaster derails.
Passengers don't notice.
Why is it 2,500 year old mommy found
what was thought to be an empty Egyptian coffin
at Sydney University?
Right.
So, yeah, yeah.
There is there it and not rude.
Just French.
Yes.
That's a that's a that's a fair mistake.
Resident head staring contest with Mountain Lion
roaming Azusa neighborhood.
All right.
All right.
Oh, man.
I like the first one better.
You can always mother crass car into pole
to prove to kids God is real police say.
So here, here, you go top top.
You can go to your top right.
Man rescued from Taliban didn't believe Donald Trump
was president.
Hunter dies after shot elephant.
I heard that.
I heard that for whoops.
Oh, well.
Yeah.
The world's the crazy place.
Gang who researched for a female CEO
has been narrowed down to three.
That's that's what that's what this is.
It's great.
It's fucking great.
That's true.
But why is it with Super Monster Wolf?
Why doesn't he get his time to shine?
He should.
Can we submit that?
That's too unbelievable for the not on Reddit.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
Poor Super Monster Wolf.
Anyway, and in that vein, let's talk about pizza Titan
Ultra.
You want to.
Yeah, you want to click this.
Have you watched this before?
Really?
Yeah.
This is a video game.
It's called Pizza Titan Ultra.
It's a Mecca that has a pizzeria in its chest.
Yeah.
And you pilot it and you and you run through the city
in the future to deliver pizzas.
And you showed your arm really hard into the building.
There's hip hop hound.
Cap Starlock.
Starlock.
Yeah.
Get it.
He's in our wall.
Bruce McGoose and Planet Man.
Captain Planet.
Yeah.
You basically like destroy the city to deliver pizza.
Cheesy goodness.
And you stop.
You stop.
Is this just Mecca crazy taxi?
This is what 100 foot robot golf should have been with
pizza delivery.
And now now there's guns shooting at our Mecca that I guess they
don't want pizza.
And then there's pizza making.
Well, because a future asshole is trying to shut down your
business for competition purposes.
He's from time traveling.
So they're getting in the way of your delivery.
Why would you order from such a pizza place?
You can put a kitty head on your Mecca.
You can customize your Mecca.
Your mere pizza Mecca.
Your pizza Titan.
Excuse me.
These are the people that made Starwall.
That's a good logo too.
Yeah.
So I believe this is coming out really soon because I have a
code for it.
Cool.
So we can.
That was fast.
I don't know if it has an actual release date.
Yeah.
And it's currently only coming to Steam, I guess.
Funcast to characters.
And good art on that character.
Those characters too.
Yeah.
This girl's got a power glove on her arm.
So look at that.
That's so good.
That's so bad.
No, never work a nine to five unless you're in a Mecca.
Yeah.
Exactly.
You nailed it when I was trying to be like, what was that
fucking Mecca game that wasn't good, 100 foot robot golf?
Yeah.
Like that's exactly what I thought it was going to be and it
is not.
So reminds me a bit of the Megasex LR.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Snacks of that a little bit.
But it's pizza instead of a car.
You know who likes pizza?
The Ninja Turtles.
They sure do.
Let me grab the.
Did I do it right?
You did.
They're the trailer for, you know, Raphael and his Ninja Turtles.
Yes, I do.
I'm aware of Raphael and his Ninja Turtles.
So that trailer just dropped and is basically the new Nickelodeon Ninja Turtles show.
Looks like Mark of the Ninja.
Yeah.
It kind of has that look.
Yeah.
Some designs, like I said, I'm not necessarily Oh, Donny, no, not not fueling some of these
designs.
I don't.
The other thing I don't like is the weird random markings on their body on them.
Like what are they supposed to be war?
They tie died themselves.
Like Leonardo's not the leader anymore because it's Raphael and his Ninja Turtles.
Raphael is five times bigger than the other turtles.
So Leo's just this weird, like so I was scarred up guy now is telling you about this apparently.
So it's like, what is Leonardo if not the leader?
So apparently in this, he's the smooth talking playboy.
Sure.
Why not?
And like the trailer gimmick seems to be like he's kind of like, yeah, egoist.
Yeah, I don't like Splinter's design at all.
I know what they're going for.
Yeah, but he's just the splinter in the CG Ninja Turtles show is the greatest splinter
of all time.
He looks like the most biggest of bad asses.
So that's what I'm saying is basically there's nothing in this.
Like this is different, but there's nothing in this, not the villain in this.
Yeah.
This is this is different, but there's nothing in this that I think is better than the designs
that we've seen before.
No, you know, I think the rise of the and it's called Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja
Turtles.
Because it's starting a whole new thing.
I know, but what is up with the rise of the rise of the like it's just the new thing to
slap rise of the Tomb Raider.
Yeah, I rise of the Tomb Raider is the only one that I went.
That's fucking dumb because the first one was called Tomb Raider.
The first should have been not rise in the first one.
So it goes Tomb Raider Rise of the Tomb Raider in the next one, Shadow of the Tomb Raider.
That should be fucking it should be goddamn.
It should be called the Tomb Raider Falls Rise of the Tomb Raider Rise of the dawn then Tomb
Raider then Shadow of the Tomb Raider Rise of the war dawn Shadowgate Dawngate Swords
No, that's a cult dawn war.
No, that's a RTS.
What the fuck name of that fucking myth gate Dawn Storm myth of dawn the first person shooter
one.
No, the fucking MOBA the Wargate Wargate.
No, that's not it.
Arena of Fate Dawn Storm.
Was it Dawngate?
Blood War.
Was it Dawngate?
Did I get it right?
Which one?
Who is it may by?
EA.
It was.
Oh fuck.
The name's even dumber than we thought of all this time.
Was Dawngate reborn?
Is that something different?
There's Final Fantasy 14.
Dawngate.
Dawngate.
That's what it was.
I got it right, but then I thought it was a cult.
And you know what it sucks to is that it's not like these things are always like trophy.
There's one successful thing that does it once and then everything just grabs and goes
oh that's a new way to do it.
I remember for a while reloaded was a thing and it was like that's not a thing.
The Matrix just tried to do something because it's the Matrix and then I was like no, no,
we can do G.I.
Joe reloaded.
You can't stop us.
But here's the thing.
What about loaded?
Well, a load of a load or load a reload.
What about?
Okay, there's this new Ninja Turtles show that we're going to have, right?
Besides Metallica.
The first Ninja Turtles show was called what Ninja Turtles, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
What was the second series?
The one on Foxbox?
One of the white pupils.
Everyone had white pupils and it was like more, it was more like for like older teens.
Cartoon, not the cartoon.
Yeah, cartoon.
I don't know.
It's called Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
So eventually they have to be like, we got to, we can't just keep calling these drastically
different versions.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, the next mutation.
That.
Oh, fuck you.
Right.
Yeah, that was that.
But then the CG Nickelodeon one, I believe was called TMNT.
Like it's the actual designation of TMNT.
Then there was the CG movie, which was called TMNT.
So I don't begrudge them for wanting to call it something different, but yeah, rise of.
The desire to put something different to distinguish it is a good, normal thing.
Yeah.
Using the thing that we're tired of hearing is not a good thing.
I think that there are two solutions to this, either fucking nut up and just call it two
or three and be honest or never make another one.
You ever be happy with it?
Just call it Ninja Turtles.
Ninja Turtles.
I was about to say that.
I was just about to say Ninja Turtles.
Yeah.
It's about them getting turtles forever.
Was called Turtles Forever.
That was the one off movie.
I know.
But like, I don't mind.
Turtles, yeah, you know what?
Dude, that's not even a bad name for a show.
Yeah.
It's like a Seinfeld with Ninja Turtles.
Is that a possible, like, what do you want?
Who's that for?
Just for me, but you don't even, but you don't really want that.
Yeah, I do.
No, I want one episode of it.
Search your feelings.
Yeah.
I'm sure there's a flash.
Rafael would be George.
You love the idea more than you love it existing.
No, man.
It's okay.
No, no, no.
Rafael will be George.
I'd assume Leonardo is.
And Leo would be Jerry.
Jerry.
Donnie would have to be Elaine.
Donnie would God he's gonna not have to be no no no no no.
A lean man.
Mike.
He's obviously準.
No.
April would be Elaine.
Think about how shitty, no Bere입니다.
How shitty Elaine can be sometimes at her worst.
Yeah.
That's basically a could all, like, rule it all right.
But they're all shitty and horrible.
They're all Raph.
They're all Raph in their heart.
Yeah, I say Elaine Elaine's Raph and who'd be Banya.
Kenneth Banya.
Who thinks it's Casey.
Casey.
No.
Newman would be Casey.
Fighting him with sticks that's gold, Leo gold.
Mr.
Newman would be Casey.
Mr.
Peterman is Shredder.
Oh yeah.
Okay.
Well then who's Splinter?
Who's Splinter?
Is it Uncle Leo?
Oh God.
It's Uncle Leo.
No that would be Newman.
No way.
Oh I know.
Bebop and Rocksteady are George's parents.
Yes.
Okay.
The Costanzas.
The Costanzas.
And Bebop's there trying to celebrate Festivus.
Yeah.
And be like Manziah.
Yeah, he needs it for his Bortits.
But no, there's no other, like Newman is the closest fifth and that makes sense for Splinter.
Like it doesn't, there's no other natural place to go.
Because Splinter's not Newman.
Who's closest?
Who else?
Where else do you go?
Yeah, I think Splinter has to be Newman.
Where else to go Pat?
But I don't like that.
Why not?
I know.
Because I don't like Newman.
But Splinter has to be someone?
Oh no, Casey wouldn't be Newman.
Casey'd be fucking Putty.
Yeah, Casey would be Putty.
Putty is Casey Jones.
That's 100%.
That's good.
It's got the eight ball jack.
That's a hundred.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
That's a good one.
He loves hockey.
Yeah, he loves hockey.
That's good.
I like it.
I'll write it out.
All right.
Soup Nazi Rat King?
Yeah, that's done.
Shredder, maybe even.
I don't think Peterman's Shredder.
Peterman's like super neutral.
No, Mr. Pitt would be Shredder.
Mr. Pitt's pretty evil.
It needs to be a proper villain, though.
Newman's the proper villain.
Newman is also the villain.
Newman is the proper villain.
Newman is the villain.
But Newman's Crang.
Yeah, Newman's Crang.
Newman is Crang.
Newman is Crang.
That's such a Crang thing to do, Newman.
Newman's Crang, yeah.
That's such a Newman thing to do, Crang.
And it's like Mikey's trying to get it.
It's Leo.
Leo's trying to, he's mad that his stereo doesn't work.
And so Mikey comes over and says, you just mess over, you just break it in the mail,
and then they send it to the mail, and Crang's like, look, I found this picture of you, Leo,
with the screwdriver, with your sword, oh, with your stereo system, and thus you can
get the refund on it.
Mikey's camera's really good because you can imagine Jerry Leo would just be like,
oh, Mike, just never, just falls ass backwards into money and sex.
That would be Mikey.
Absolutely.
He would.
And then Raph keeps failing to get the calzone for his boss because he tried to, Raph is
totally the guy who would take the dollar back out of the tip jar because he didn't
see it.
Yeah.
Raph's wallet is too fat.
And it explodes.
Raph would get angry that his date threw up the meal before she had a chance to digest.
Oh, my God.
Is George's fiance, April?
No.
No.
But I can't find any funny.
No, because in the original cartoon, Raphiel had a girlfriend who was like a weird turt,
like tadpole lizard girl for like one episode.
And Raphiel was too cheap to buy good envelopes so that tadpole died.
It sure doesn't.
This doesn't work.
It's falling apart the further we go.
We were, we kept it going in the hopes that some like platinum might clink in.
Yeah.
But it really just.
It's just merely gold.
It's barely.
Yeah.
And the problem is that you're going, we're going off of that.
That, that, what was it?
Was it like funny or die or college humor or whatever it was thing where they're like
the group of four?
All right.
What was that?
And so they compared the Ninja Turtles to Sex and the City to the Power Rangers to
Seinfeld.
There's five Power Rangers.
What was that?
It was a video and I want to say it was a crack.
Yeah, it's cracked.
Okay.
Yeah.
I really liked it.
And it was like, Oh, who's your favorite?
Who's your favorite Power Ranger?
Red until green and then after this 30s and white, you know, or whatever.
And it's like everybody's, yeah, because everyone wants to be this thing.
It had fucking Michael Swain on it.
I remember.
Yeah.
And so it basically makes the comparison between all the different personality types
and how they pretty much represent like different types of people.
And it's a common thing to do when you make a group, but it's called crack after hours.
Sure.
Sure.
So you're kind of doing that.
I am.
No, but we are kind of doing that.
I accidentally tapped into it.
Yeah.
Because it's very easy to take one group of characters and do that with another when
the personality is happening.
In general, I have to say though, it's like, I'm just generally always really happy that
it's like Ninja Turtles still a big thing.
Yeah.
New generate like, like decades still.
Yeah.
Kids need to know about their goddamn bad ass amphibians every 10 years at least.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm happy.
I'm sad.
Biker mice can't get the same treatment.
It deserves it too.
Do you really want it?
It did come back.
But do you really want it?
No, I just want it to spite you.
Yeah, I figured.
See, see, Matt, I take.
I legit want street sharks.
I take my energy into not liking good things.
And Matt puts his energy into liking things that aren't worth it.
Right.
Right.
Like this is the two directions to spite you.
Yeah.
I see this.
One is much more damaging.
I'm clearly hurting myself more than that is getting like wasting his time.
I can fully see the investment that my friends make in in spiting me.
I think with my bull, based on what I love and what I hate, my bullshit really got upset
for like maybe 30 minutes, but is now put up like a sheer wall.
I've been staring at two biker mice doing wrestling moves for fucking months now and
I'm letting it rock.
So it's fine.
There were guests from a fan.
I'll be real.
I didn't eat.
I can't even see them anymore.
Exactly.
It's immunity.
I forgot that they were there.
It's immunity.
Even I got bored playing with them.
There's toys of two biker mice sitting on the podcast table as we speak a month and
I stopped.
God, I got no more pleasure from it.
Well, maybe Matt pretends to like street sharks just to get me.
I legit like it.
I know you do.
That's the worst part.
I know.
Is it because they I wanted like an arcade beat him up a street.
It's like, that's what I wanted it to call weird video.
Why did stone protectors get one of the sharks didn't do it, but we don't stand up a street.
But here's the problem.
When something comes along in that genre, yeah, that's actually good.
Yeah, it just gets sandbagged.
Like we don't give that same amount of love to SWAT cats or mummies alive.
Your hair.
I'm the good ones.
I give tons of love to mummies alive.
That show is great.
They're so good.
Those are the good versions of these things like a year ago compared to street sharks.
It's not good.
The transformations are awesome.
It's not a great show.
We'll eat.
Turn away from Matt and look at me.
Okay.
Like no, look at it.
Hold it.
When we go to the US, what does Matt want to do?
He wants to go eat at a Denny's.
This is Matt.
This is how he works.
Okay.
These standards for quality are intrinsically tied into trash.
So if something's good, but not terrible, it doesn't do it for him.
He needs the trash.
Got to be zero or 10.
Can't be a five.
It's true.
It's true.
Like Wild West Cowboys and Moomesa got a Konami arcade game.
You think that deserved one?
I thought you made that up.
No.
No, they certainly did.
Cowboys and Moomesa.
Does that deserve one?
No.
The Street Sharks?
No.
Attack of the Killer Tomatoes?
Never got.
Street Sharks never get up?
No.
Good.
Good.
No.
Would have made a great game.
It could have.
Yeah, but we don't know.
We'll never know.
Have we done the full obscure mutated animal T Hero team?
Like what?
Like just mention them all?
Everything's gotten a pull, right?
Cheetah Men got a pull.
Like they all got a pull.
We've all talked about it at one point.
I think.
I want to say so.
We've barely mentioned stone protectors.
No, because I don't have much on it.
I saw the toy commercials.
That's all I got.
I don't know if that is.
There's a cartoon.
I don't have much on stone protectors.
Imagine Treasure Trolls.
And Samurai Pizza Cats.
I'm not counting that.
Because that's too good.
That's real.
And it's anime.
They were like Treasure Trolls.
But they were buffed up.
He meant.
Yeah.
Hey, do you remember Samurai Pizza Cats?
There were the three people.
And then there were the four extras that would show up in time to time.
And one of those guys was the flying guy.
And he was the best one by far.
And then the show realized that.
And then stone protectors.
And then they all got flying upgrades.
And that guy basically disappeared.
Never to be seen again.
I did not remember that.
Because of his.
His gimmick got turned into a universal upgrade for everyone else.
Why did I didn't?
It sucked so bad.
That's rough.
He was my favorite of the Pizza Cats.
Man, you got a three tattoo inside that stone protectors box.
The fucking stone protectors were there.
The Treasure Trolls attempt to get in on that.
The toy team.
Crew.
There's like a ninja.
Boys ages 12.
There's a hockey guy.
There's a wrestler.
Boys ages 12 to 90.
Is what the stone protectors were trying to get the market cornered on.
Look at those fucking pieces of nineties.
Wow.
Absolute unit.
And off these lads.
That's the worst I've seen in a while.
No, I want to say, I want to say we got them all.
We barely ever talked about extreme dinosaurs.
I never saw it as a kid.
What is that?
Because hold on.
Is there new shit that came out when we were older?
Extreme dinosaurs is street sharks, but they're dinosaurs.
I think Plague mentioned it.
I mean Denver, the last dinosaur is.
No, put extreme dinosaurs.
Watch.
I know that.
What are we talking about right now?
Oh my God.
That's stupid.
Wait.
Wait.
1997?
We're out of there.
We're out.
Extreme dinosaurs.
Lay out.
Is this America only?
Yeah.
I'm assuming it was.
This is just dinosaur street sharks.
Those are the monsters that attack the street fighters.
They got their own show.
You're totally right.
Because one of them was blue and one of them was green.
The color palette is so fucking ridiculous.
Look at that weird alien woman.
That is a weird alien lady.
Weird alien woman is just Captain Planet.
Oh man.
See, that's it.
Oh boy.
They're extreme dinosaurs.
Okay.
Oh, don't click on that one down there.
No, not that one.
The one next to it.
Don't click on that one.
What is even happening?
Oh no.
Oh.
It's the plague one.
Extreme dinosaur girls.
Well.
Nothing harder than a long project.
That kind of stuff.
See, but the most ridiculous part about all of these characters.
They're just sitting in the turtle's house.
Here's what's the worst thing.
Here's the worst thing.
What is the worst thing?
All of these awful ass mutant teams.
Yeah.
Be beloved as Ninja Turtles villains.
Yeah.
If these guys showed up to fight the turtles.
There was.
That's traceratons.
Eggs and war.
We would love them as villains in Ninja Turtles.
Imagine if the book broke out and we're just like, hey, what the fucking rival dudes in
the show.
They'd be the best.
We're from fucking space.
What do you got turtles?
You live in a sewer?
Unironically love those characters as villains.
Ninja Turtles had the long running Archie comics for like years that they went on the
craziest adventures ever.
And there was even a spinoff comic called the mighty mutimals, which was the strongest
of their friends like Ray Filet and Mondo Gecko.
And they had a guy called Jagwar.
Okay.
Right.
And they were the chaotic.
They were the chaotic.
Excellent.
They were the chaotic.
And they went on even crazier adventures.
And I'm sure the guys were talking about even fighting those periphery mutants, like that's
who they would.
They would fight.
What are you looking at?
Oh, man.
I want to know if there's an answer.
Yes.
Fuck you.
Oh, I was looking for the category to call all of this bullshit and different animal
soup.
Wikipedia list of anthropomorphic animal soup.
Holy shit.
Oh, let's go.
Let's fucking go.
Okay.
Okay.
It should only count if they have a show.
Should they not?
Yes.
I see some that don't have.
Banjo-Kazooie count?
It doesn't.
All right.
All right.
All right.
Oh, we're waiting.
We've wasted our life.
Ace the bat hound is just a bat hound.
I've wasted my entire life.
Okay.
Okay.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Gizmo duck is what, you know what I mean?
Like, mhm.
Duck tails.
That's just one guy.
No.
No.
No, no, no.
Hey, fuck all that shit.
Immature radioactive samurai slugs from Tiny Tooth.
Hold the fuck up.
Hong Kong Fui.
Why do I know this name?
He's old and racist.
Why do I know this name?
It's the Hannah Berbera thing.
Is it?
It's bad.
Don't look at it.
Don't look at it.
I remember this name for some.
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
It's just a weird Kung Fu dog.
Kung Fu dog.
And he probably speaks.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
All right.
Let's get away from him.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
All right.
What are we looking at here?
Immature radioactive slug.
That's a parody.
That's a parody.
That's a parody.
We're talking about, like, a Ninja Turtles ball.
Oh my God.
There's so many.
Listen, dude.
Maui Maui doesn't count.
Maui Maui doesn't count.
The anthro.
That's just a man kind.
Captain Sidney and the Space Monkeys.
What's that?
That could be a thing.
Hold on.
And Captain Carrington is amazing zoo crew.
Oh, fuck it.
All right.
We got two places to go.
Oh, we're here.
1997.
It's come.
It's old enough.
This is one.
It's old enough.
It's a super one.
Hold on.
Hold on.
What's the country of origin?
It looks like it's American.
It lists 26 episodes.
Hallmark Entertainment.
Okay.
Country of Origins United States for Captain Simeon.
All right.
Captain Simeon and the Space Monkeys.
Oh my God.
You see it?
That's what we're looking for.
That's what we're talking about.
This is real.
This is absolutely it.
Yeah.
This was a thing.
Well, a bunch of idiots.
We just never knew about this.
The gorilla's cool.
The gorilla's cool.
It's got the logo.
They all have the same.
Excuse me and everything.
They all have the exact same fucking formula.
There's no toys, but, like, it's totally following the formula.
There's toys right there.
There's toys right there.
Oh.
There you.
Okay.
Wow.
That's good.
Discovering it live.
Captain Simeon.
Gorilla.
Oh, man.
Like the only thing left is to find out if this was like a tie-in from some sort of,
like, oh, from four-year king?
No.
From, like, like, like Planet of the Apes spin-off cartoon.
Well, no.
Really?
But during the Monkey New Space Flight from 1960s.
The Monkey Space Flight from the 1960s.
That's how it happened.
The champ named Charlie went off to outer space.
Therefore, the characters are Charles Chuck Simeon.
Gorilla.
Charlie, the original Captain Char- the Captain Simeon is Charlie, the monkey that went to
space.
That's the origin.
That's awesome.
He got irradiated.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Astro the space dog.
Okay.
Okay.
Now, Captain Carrot and his amazing zoo crew is 1982.
Those are DC Comics characters.
These are DC Comics characters.
One of them's fucking up Superman, so I'm down with this.
That looks like Kryptonite fucking chains.
Yeah, these weird furry animals are beating up fucking Superman.
That's just fucking Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck.
Yeah.
But they never, they never, like-
Porky Pig.
These guys never got in on, like, the animated craze.
No, no, no.
They don't get them out of my face.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's a waste of my time.
No, no, no.
It's not that 90s cartoon.
I bet you in, like, 94 to 97, there's a bunch of them we don't know.
Kung Fu Dino Posse, that sounds strong.
What year?
What year?
Germany?
2010, Germany.
That doesn't count.
We have no choice.
It counts.
It counts, but it's beyond our scope.
Yeah, we could never do that.
It's more just like we couldn't have known.
How could we have known about Kung Fu?
Yeah, this looks super new.
Yeah, looks new.
And it looks just like extreme dinosaurs.
Yeah.
There's no way we could have known.
We're the Germaner.
Yeah.
That's unfortunate.
Lancelot Link, 1971.
Fuck off.
No.
Secret Chimp?
I don't know.
I don't know.
You have to go with the thing that sounds like-
Oh!
Oh, Lancelot Limp's Secret Chimp is a-
That's live action.
That's a slave monkey.
It's a littlest hobo, but it's just a chip.
They put peanut butter in his mouth.
Yeah, it's one of those.
You put peanut butter in my mouth.
Oh, that's unfortunate.
Okay.
I like peanut butter.
Okay.
You got to take one that's a team.
Yeah, yeah, you need to see what you do.
What about dinosaurs?
Shut up.
What is it?
These are all bad to look at.
1998.
That's still good.
That's still good.
Dino zone in Japan.
Who's on Fox Kids?
It's Japanese.
This is shit.
Oh, okay.
Oh, it's robots.
I've seen this.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's anime kids with CG.
Horrible.
Yes, yes, yes.
I totally do.
I know what this is.
I see this.
Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
That doesn't count.
We know what that is.
They spin their dinosaur-based blade blades at each other.
That was early.
The Danger Mouse used to be my favorite character.
Fucking love Danger Mouse.
I need to get away from this.
Uh, preteen dirty gene kung fu kangaroos.
Okay.
Keep that one in mind, but I see one over there, too.
What are you looking at?
Instinctioners.
That could be anything.
But fuck that.
That's nothing.
It's a comic book.
It's a weird comic book.
Yeah, no.
It looks like Animorphs.
Preteen dirty gene kung fu kangaroos is a comic book as well from the 80s.
Yeah, they're doing it.
Yeah.
Sometimes the name kind of gives it away a little bit.
Tiger sharks.
Which one?
Up.
Yeah.
What do we got?
Ooh.
26 episodes, 1987.
Animated?
Rankin.
You're going to have to type in more than tiger sharks because that's an existing animal.
Yeah.
He says you.
No.
Oh.
That's too new.
No.
And these are thunder cast over there.
It's wild.
Dude, you have to type in animated series.
Tiger sharks, 19, animated, whatever.
I think I see it under there.
What the?
Ooh, this is a weird one.
Tiger sharks is a weird looking one.
I don't know what to make of it, but it definitely looks like it's Japanese.
It's a attractive mermaid.
Even though it's not.
It's got that style in it.
I know, but it's got, it's both.
Yeah.
That would explain it.
I can see it.
That explains everything.
I see a little bit.
All right.
Should we get back on track?
Yeah.
Man, dude, this is.
That was amazing though.
Wikipedia's list of anthropomorphic animal superheroes.
You don't fuck it.
I'm bookmarking it.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Hey, go look at who's edited lately.
What?
Eli, what the fuck?
Yeah.
He keeps track of this.
No, we got to keep this right here for quick access.
All right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
All right.
I think they'll always be cool.
Okay.
Always be cool.
That's not true.
I think they'll always be cool.
They won't necessarily be.
They've been making fun of their language and bringing it back so that cowabunga works
again.
They've been forcing it.
I appreciate that.
Ironically saying that.
That's weird that that fucking, that arcade game by Rothrails that's not even out yet
is still going to be the old designs.
Don't worry about it.
From the CG show.
That's like, they're probably going to retool that now.
Fuck the news.
I'm going back.
I want to know more.
I want to know more.
I want to know more.
What?
What?
What are we looking at here?
Are we looking for one more?
Yeah.
Okay.
Hieronymus hip flask.
I'm going to tab that open.
That's a character.
That's a one character.
I'm going to tab open.
No, no.
Hoppy the Marvel Bunny sounds like some bullshit.
I don't.
I don't trust that.
Snailians could be a thing, but there's no.
Yeah.
There's no link to it.
But Snailians.
Hey, you shut your mouth.
Sharky and George is right there.
That doesn't.
Space cats.
That's some bullshit.
No, click space cats.
That's some bullshit.
Sparkster's up there as well.
And Skylanders like that.
Strictly the Super Cat.
We're looking for a team, though.
Space cats implies multiple cats, Woolly.
Bat Fink.
No.
Battle Beasts.
That's the fighting game.
Battle Beasts is the toy.
No, no, no.
That's going to be the toy.
The little toy series.
The little cool guys that I love.
Baby well-willed beasts.
No.
We go like, like, like look for the team.
The Mighty Ducks do count.
The Mighty Ducks.
Absolutely.
They count hard.
I forgot.
I forgot about them.
They count.
The three Caballeros.
You saw Gio Jimbo.
It's so fucking cool.
He doesn't deserve to be there.
And then Wonder Pets.
All right.
Let's see what we're looking at.
Snailians.
Oh my god.
Yeah, yeah.
Yo, Snailians might be real.
Hold up.
Oh, we're going video on this shit.
Oh my god.
Snailians might be the realest it's ever been.
This is really bad.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Snailians.
You're just gross snail man.
You're just Battletoads.
This is exactly what I wanted.
Battletoads down.
Yeah.
Battletoads try to have a cartoon.
They're hero snails and they're aliens.
And there's toys.
Washington, Roosevelt, Jefferson, and Lincoln.
Oh, the kids are freaking out.
Super Sonic Shell Fighter Snailians.
Okay.
Did they have a cartoon?
Yes.
Because they had a bit of animation, but that could have just been for the.
Okay.
Fuck the rest.
Space catch.
No shit's given.
Go away.
Wonder pets.
Fuck off.
Hip flask.
No one gives a shit.
We're going down the Snailians hole.
All right.
Snailians.
With steam?
No.
No, no, no, no.
That's that's that's something else completely.
Okay.
Toys of the 80s.
Snailians.
But did they have a show?
They had a bit of animation, like I said, but that doesn't necessarily mean they had
a show.
But why would they put that much budget behind just?
No, they did that sometimes for some things with those comic books.
I don't see a show.
Are those cotton?
No, they're not comics.
They're just.
But this is still this is still Ninja Turtles.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
It's so weird because they're flesh.
They're like flesh colored.
I think there's a comic.
I think there's a comic.
Comics.
Good.
Snailians on Twitter.
No, but look at that.
That's them though.
Because look at the each.
What is that?
Each one's because of the coins.
Why do they got coins though?
A quarter of a nickel, a dime and a penny.
Punisher.
It's totally fucking.
Fucking dime.
Snailians.
I've been running the sad website since 2001.
Let me tell you something, bitch.
Over the course of more than five years have been emailed about my website less than two
dozen times.
And all of this multi dozen is fan mail.
I've been, I've had to wait through nearly half of it was asking for something other
about snailians.
It all started back in 1992.
I received a couple of highly unusual toys from my aunt as a Christmas present.
Oh my God.
We're going down.
This is real ultimate power.
Like the booklet.
Okay.
Yeah.
Matt.
This is the art from the booklet that it came with.
Yeah.
Some toys have little booklets.
Like remember the old aliens toys had little like comic booklets.
San Francisco, the home of the eight year old Max.
Of course his name is Max and it's just their Mabel and their baby brother Monty beneath
the hustle and bustle of six little feet lay another world.
Six feet below those six little feet.
The universe knows crawl space where life slows to a crawl in snail Francisco.
The heart of the snail community on earth a snails pace makes a happy place.
And if snail Francisco citizens agreed to one thing it was that life could wash could
rush by unless you knew how to just take it slow.
Yeah.
Because your snails.
Oh, but who's attacking the mat.
Oh, fucking.
So the bad times are coming in fast.
The Lunatrix under the iron pincered rule of Zug the Supreme had targeted earth for tick
infestation and plan to launch their invasion by concrete snail San Francisco snail Francisco.
I'm sorry.
I almost spoke out of line there.
This look how these pages of lore.
Yeah.
Oh, we found the slot.
We found the slogan.
This is the what's the slogan.
Let's kick some tick.
Because the evil forces ticks.
They're ticks.
Oh, man.
I think we must need their need.
Their only hope is us say is not saying no.
Let's kick some tick.
The Lunar ticks are the enemies that have to be defeated.
So so they go into their armor because they think it's like a shell like that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
Because they say, God, I love being a turtle and going to the shells.
Why?
What's with the pennies?
Okay.
Moved by the snailians plight, the citizens of snail Francisco would vow to help the new
allies.
Once the Lunar ticks are defeated, unable to pronounce their native snail in these names,
the snail mates give each daily in a new name, nighting them in the honor of the great
leaders who have come before them.
And it's and also happened to drop out from the pockets of the up world into theirs.
Washington, Jefferson, Roosevelt and Lincoln.
Oh, my God.
There's a new one.
There's a new.
Go, go.
Escargo.
Oh, man.
The snailians.
They all have little sidekicks.
Yeah.
They're a little familiar.
Jefferson and Chet.
Washington and Sparks.
Chet.
Roosevelt and Cruz.
Lincoln and Charger.
Tom Cruise, Boo.
War.
And then the Lunar ticks have Zug and Itchy.
Man, you know, I'd love to have been near the people that created this to see how fucking
high they were.
Oh, fuck.
Blastar and blister.
Man, I want to sign this guy's guest book so hard.
This is wild shit right here.
This is the best.
Never heard of this ever.
This is exactly the best.
This guy's guest book so hard.
This is wild shit right here.
This is the best.
I've never heard of this ever.
This is exactly what I wanted to come back in for.
Extreme dinosaurs.
I heard the name.
Some people were like, how do you feel about extreme dinosaurs?
And I'm like, I have no receptacle to put my emotions.
But snailians.
I bookmarked that shit.
Right.
We're coming back in from time to time.
We'll dip into more lore.
So now we know that these are the citizens of Snail Francisco.
Those are the Lunar ticks.
Help.
And the snailians show up to save the day.
Their shells, their safe homes, are also their weapons.
We now have context for this commercial.
It makes so much more sense now.
The lore is complete.
This was a nightmare fuel of unknowable information.
We watched it the first time.
Lost and confused.
But here we are.
Found.
Converted.
They're supersonic shell fighters.
That's what I said.
I didn't hear it.
All right.
Okay.
What's the next news item?
Like sex is great and all, but snailians.
I mean, it's like whatever.
Like there's a rumor that they might remake ace combats four, five and zero.
Oh, seriously?
Yeah.
It's not as exciting as snailians.
No, but it's just, there's a job listing that popped up and they're looking for people
that are, have a deep understanding of four, five and zero.
So fans, basically.
So it's the most loose.
Those games are amazing.
It's the most loose rumor ever.
What's zero?
That's the one that came after five, isn't it?
Yep.
And it was.
Was it like a reboot or?
No, no.
Just earlier in the war.
Just calling it.
Yeah, exactly.
Okay.
It had some fucking good music.
Oh, like, oh, how good was it?
I used it on at least two projects.
I know.
I know.
I know.
Those games are all amazing.
Like I feel like.
And they all have the tech end story mode, like.
The strange real dude plot.
The strange real.
Sure.
That's the name of that universe.
I didn't make that up.
That's crazy.
I didn't know that.
You know, the overly sincere.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
The style of that universe is called strange real.
Interesting.
I've never heard that term.
And Ace Combat.
Where does it come from?
The developer.
Oh, wow.
Okay.
Okay.
That's cool.
It's so fucking weird.
That's why Ace, that's why when Ace Combat seven got announced and they said we are
preparing to return to the strange real.
All Ace Combat fans everywhere went, whoa, yeah.
I'll fly with the angels, mister.
All 12 of us.
The messenger is coming to the switch.
Yeah, fucking messenger.
So that's a cool.
And devolvers picked it up.
That's the most obvious like place to put that ever.
So right now it's just for Switch and PC, but like, I just love how this like project was
just kind of like, hey, we exist.
And then like two months goes by and devolvers like, yep, give me some of that.
Yep.
Just the latest of many Switch ports.
Is there still only the first trailer for this?
There's, I think there's two now and there's like 10 minutes of gameplay.
Because I want to see how much of the Super Nintendo version of the game is in there.
Yeah, it's the same one.
It's the same one.
Is that rare or is that like common?
I want to say that that's, wow, there's a skill tree.
In the 10 minutes of gameplay watch, like he goes into it.
But I think they're just showing the same demo build.
Yeah, it's the same trailer that we saw before.
It's like that game has a perfect ability for a third act plot twist where you jump into a portal.
Really terrible N64 game.
And then they jump back out and go, this is terrible.
So there's that.
God bless Kotaru Uchikoshi.
Yes.
Because he had something to say on his Twitter.
The Aka the guy that made the Zero Escape games.
And he says, please don't worry, everything is going well.
In the near future, you will get a glimpse of one of the most fascinating adventure games in the galaxy.
Your jaw will drop to the mantle of the earth with great astonishment beyond description.
It sounds like a clickbait article.
Please look forward to it.
Thank you.
This sounds like a guy who writes visual fucking novels.
Isn't this like every single release is like we barely scrapped up enough money to put this out there?
I don't know if he's aware of what we call up-worthy language.
But back in the days of fucking up-worthy where every article had that type of shit,
you'll spend the rest of the day picking your chop off the floor.
You'll never believe what this game developer achieved with one simple trick.
At 059, you have to do what she says.
Oh man, did you guys see fucking Yoko Taro's response to all the awards, the near-automatizes?
Did he fall on the floor and start crying?
And shove his own team under the bus?
So Okabe is like doing the video where he accepts the award.
And then he's like, also Yoko Taro has something to say and it cuts to fucking Yoko lounging out on the floor,
lying down, being miserable, just going like, stop giving him awards.
Yeah, yeah.
Nobody gave me an award for the scenario I wrote.
He said everyone's giving him awards for his music.
Don't give him any more awards ever again.
Not to mention the other one where he calls in his staff and goes like, this guy didn't think.
We found a tweet on his Twitter saying, I didn't show up because I didn't think we'd win anything.
Like what do you gotta say now?
And he just forces him to wear the mask and apologize profusely.
Dude, it's hilarious.
Fucking blows his shit out.
Yoko Taro is the realest.
It's so real.
Stop giving him awards.
Do you guys remember what he was talking about when people asked him about a sequel to Nier Automata, right?
No.
Like he's like, okay, I'd be down to do it, but first Square Enix has to pay me.
Oh yeah, sure, sure.
The least Japanese answer ever.
Wait, pay me for the work I've done or pay me up front for the work I will do?
Just pay me.
Just pay me now.
Yeah.
I paid.
There is a Kickstarter going on for a game called One Night.
What's this?
This is an 80s themed action RPG Diablo Meets Earthbound.
That is a weird mix and I don't know what it means.
Haven't seen this?
Yeah, I haven't seen this.
Check it out.
You might be interested.
I like both of those things.
One of them way, way, way more than the other and that I don't like Earthbound at all.
So this is from Black Seven Studios and it basically is-
Is it made of former members of the bunch?
Yes, it is.
It is basically, it looks like, I want to say, it reminds me of Crawl's art style a little
bit.
Yeah, a little bit.
A little more detailed.
You know, and it's got that isometric angle as well.
You saw-
It is an action game and it's sort of 80s style.
You saw that Fork Parker from Devolver even said that too.
Said we are announcing a new game from the former members of all the BioShock teams.
Of course.
They're dividing.
So yeah, you got classes of weapons from ranged melee, magic and you basically-
Oh!
Are dude.
You're just regular guy.
You're regular guy.
This trailer has a very raw art style shift halfway through it.
Well, it's actually the same art style.
You know what I mean.
It's just that you're seeing hooded characters being evil and then suddenly you're just a
normal guy.
And you've got-
Where the hell is the Earthbound influence here?
I think it's-
You're walking around a normal city.
One day.
And then there's crazy fantasy shit that happens.
Yeah, and you're in a normal living room talking to normal people.
This game looks weird.
Yeah.
This reminds me a bit more of Exider, the other pixel based.
Dunno.
You've seen it before.
We just forget because we always forget-
This is absolutely bizarre.
And it's-
But it's interesting.
Oh yeah.
It's very interesting.
It's doing something that-
That guy raised a skeleton.
Can't say I've seen a ton of.
So yeah, check this out.
It's called One Night.
It's up on Kickstarter now.
It's got 5K of 122,000 hits looking for.
This reminds me of some fucking weird goddamn FMV game.
The page played once.
What the fuck's that game called?
Harvester.
It reminds me of Harvester, actually.
But it's not an FMV game.
Yeah, I know.
But I mean like the town and all the weirdness and all that shit.
Yeah.
That's gross.
Yeah.
So-
Oh, that was-
That was real gross.
There's some interesting art and things to check out on it.
So yeah, it's called One Night.
I didn't hear about this one.
Yeah.
Looks like they got a cool idea going.
Well, do you have like a vein hooked into Kickstarter?
You seem to find every single one.
It's crazy.
I do.
No, he just finds probably like 10% of them though.
It's called twitter.com.
Oh, I see.
But you only find a fraction.
It's like, it's hard to get a handle on all of them sometimes.
I mean, once upon a time early on, I used to browse, but-
Yeah.
Those days are gone.
Fucking behind me.
Plus the general searching and browsing on Twitter is terrible.
Oh, no, Kickstarter is not great.
You might have seen when I clicked that window open,
there was a big red warning telling me to fill out a fucking-
Yeah.
Crossing souls.
We were just playing like yesterday or the day before or whatever.
Just like tracking down all the Kickstarter's that we've backed
out those forums is getting more and more difficult.
Just stop using backer kits.
Stop using all this shit.
Yes, please.
Just send me the fucking survey using the built-in feature on Kickstarter, please.
There's also some Barlok and-
Barlok, some Barlok and Broly footage, but you know.
Broly's level three looks really shitty.
I don't think so.
I think it looks cool.
It's a little underwhelming considering Broly.
Well, yeah, but that's-
It's referencing the source material.
Yeah, but it could be bigger.
But they make it accurate.
It should be bigger and cooler.
It's not as cool as it should be.
But it's because it's accurate.
But there's-
But, Willie, there's been accurate, bigger, cooler things that other characters do.
But the ball he shoots out is about that size.
Sure.
Then give him a different super.
Yeah.
Broly looks like he's going to be a hard time because he's got a lot of armor, but he has
low damage, and Barlok looks like he has privilege.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Barlok has fucking invincible bionic arms, and he's got straight-up locked-out spins
and all kinds of crazy shit, so it's interesting.
But yeah.
How many Goku's do we need?
We need twice as many.
We need two more Goku's.
Yeah, we need-
It's only two and a half.
Ultra instant Goku and untransformed plain Goku.
And then there's that new one that's only in Xenoverse.
There are-
I do agree with you that cooler is better than accurate.
But this game has decided its path.
There are a lot of fucking wild ass pseudo-canonical fucking Dragon Ball characters, like dark
masked, resurrected Shin Broly and shit in the fucking mobile game.
I just want to see a silhouette for like baby show up and watch the world light up.
Oh yeah, like baby Vegeta.
No, baby.
Oh, okay, sorry.
I thought I meant like baby Vegeta and baby Goku.
No, no, no, like GT.
We don't have to go into that and mention it.
Yeah, he meant- that's what he was talking about, baby Vegeta.
Oh yeah, sure.
Yeah.
But I mean, put the non-Vegeta for-
Okay, okay.
We don't have to go into it, but you see like the breakdown of exactly how SNK heroines
plays?
No, actually.
All I'm teaching you is all I'm telling you one thing.
There's two attack buttons.
There's two attack buttons, hard and light, and there's one special move button that works
like a smash.
So that's how it plays.
And they're like, we want to make this really casual.
Just let everyone know.
Make sure you can play with one hand.
And seeing the way like there's like fucking like exploding, like what was it?
Food.
Exploding food items and like madness going on.
There's an item that mosaics the screen.
Oh, when you do your specials too much, they'll stop being effective because your special
moves are delegated by a bar that will wear down.
So you have to tag your character out for those specials to become decent again.
And I'm like, this sounds like a thing, but I'd kind of rather it play a little more
traditionally.
I hope there's like an option to maybe like have a pro version of it maybe.
Not that I'm a pro.
What are you looking at, Willie?
Emails.
Emails.
Hey, if you want to send an email, send it to superpassfriendcast.com.
Tell us about your Snalions.
Tell us about your idea.
People have already started telling us about their Snalions.
Oh, wow.
That was fast.
I like this.
That was fast.
Literally, Noah says, God damn it, I clearly remember having these stupid toys as a child.
Oh, damn.
Thanks to this bullshit.
Oh, no.
Fuck you guys.
That's great.
Oh, no.
So there's that.
Keep on being a Snalions fan, Nathan.
Yeah.
Oh, no.
What's your shell house weapon?
Another person's calling us.
My shell.
Yeah.
Snalions super fans.
And they got, yeah.
All right.
When's SnailCon, guys?
I was just about to say see you at SnailCon 2018.
Where is it happening in my mind?
My fantasy.
My memory palace.
Anya soon.
Oh, come on, memory palace.
Hey, Castle Super Beast Wars cast.
I've been rewatching some speedruns from ADG, AGDQ.
And I was incredibly impressed by the human revolution one by Henneke.
I didn't watch that one.
Knowing that Matt tested it and Willie tested director's cut made me wonder if you guys,
how you felt about seeing the games you tested be broken and glitched through.
How does seeing a bug or exploit you may have missed be used for the enjoyment of thousands
make you feel.
Well, I have to say that first and foremost, I was doing compliance.
So ultimately.
Yeah.
That's a whole different piece.
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
It's not functionality things.
It's like, whatever you're using to get you through the game like that is go nuts, have
fun.
I don't care.
Because the stuff that I cared about was, oh, this game's not coming out.
Yeah.
Willie's like, he sees an icon on the screen and it's a couple of pixels over to the wrong
side.
And he's like, oh, compliance.
If this game is, like, if you find something that I would have had to deal with, it means
the game would have not ended up in your hands.
Or somebody at the company that was supposed to check for that missed it because that happens.
I think it's really cool.
I haven't like ever sat down and watched like a speed run of a game.
I have watched LPs of like multiple LPs of like no more heroes and things like that.
But I know that it's really cool slash terrifying for developers like when Sean Velasco was watching
that A.G.D. or Summer Games Unquick run of Double Dragon Neon where Murphurgator was
like, yeah, so you can just do this and not all the AI just breaks.
And you hear him on the phone, the developer of the game is going.
That's amazing.
Oh, man.
I'd like to sit down and watch like I would like to watch that human revolution run just
to see because I did have to play that as fast as I could for like a little while.
So it turns out if you throw this guy, the guy in the hive, you just you win credits roll.
Yeah.
The panche blows up.
Take that panche.
Take that huge arrow.
What I like more than anything is a matter of mind, I have talked about this before.
It's better than testers and having our opinions is a dev sitting by a speed runner going, wait,
what are you doing?
How did you do that?
Which is what I just said.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's that's what I just said just now.
That's that's the what was the it was a Double Dragon Neon.
Right.
Are you serious right now?
I'm sorry.
I had to I told I told that everything I yeah.
Matt talked for like five.
I'm sorry.
I was reading the next email and I completely tuned you out.
Exactly what I said.
I'm I'm exposed completely completely exposed.
I was that's the worst one ever.
That's bad.
That's bad.
Completely looking for the next email completely zoned that out.
What's the next evil?
I'm sorry.
That's fine.
I'm really I like I forgot a conversation that Matt and me had like that happened but
that happens in micro moments like earlier today when I said the thing at the end of
the Snailians thing and I went I was a big Masonic warrior happens it totally does but
like that was long that was a that's missing time aliens fucking took you emails bruh emails bruh
you got to scan the emails to see like what no terrible ones are worth reading I like
to see tension shadow assassins well it's it's it's because essentially I mean now I've
got to just find one while we stall they'll probably be more tension runs all right I
checked well these shoes they're both the same color today good okay we can take what
about that oh yeah mm-hmm when from software reveals the new tension game that's probably
bloodmore to we got one coming in from Levi oh Levi yeah as in Levi well that's that's
not fair just call us call us literally buzz my phone they're super booper foopers that's
that's with Willie's shoe combo breaker I thought about my own shoes I've never bought cool
novelty shoes mostly because I always worried about them getting dirty but I'd buy merch
candy and newer and never open it because even because even boxers so I can't talk what
are you saying Levi was a good email to pick so my question is what's the weirdest piece
of merch you own weirdest the weirdest piece of merch well those those Street Fighter cans
that I had of energy drinks a lot of toxic they fucking I will I left them closed but
after a couple years they didn't want to stay in the can and it started to get bad that's
bad it got real rough if you've got a kind of anything's gonna beat that if you've got
a can of the red Mega Man drink or the Resident Evil anti poison or whatever I never drank
the Resident Evil and I did I did have a dragon punch once it was fine just Jojo Boxer just
a Red Bull I think I have a Godzilla car it's a little like die cast car and it has Godzilla
googly eyes on the top on the front like where the headlights are and it has its spines on
the back and it's kind of like a ATV not ATV but like a military Humby oh I got one yeah
and someone gave that to me and I was like this is the weirdest thing I've ever seen
though the one I have is a birthday present that you guys are highly familiar with which
was it's a Hulk car yes Hulk on a ATV that was part of our recording equipment for many
years held down a wire I believe he held down the mic wire he is somewhere lost in my home
currently times if you ever want a free blow up by the way I'll give you what pardon I'll
give you a free blow up every single podcast while you're answering a podcast question
if you just turn to me and go right woolly you get free guard break exposure no free
I'm giving you that one okay sure all right dear skeleton warriors and Pat in honor Dragon
Ball Super's finale featuring an awesome thing yes yeah I would like to ask what's your favorite
team up attack in all of fiction one of you is gonna say cross cut well shit it's not it
but X cuts badass X cut sorry X cut but X cuts not he's thinking of X cut I like X
cut a lot I but I like the one on the box I like I like fire sword a lot one on the
box is wrong it's super inaccurate because Marl is doing it instead of Luca but it's still like
the concept of jumping in the sword in the air to slash and getting the fire on it while it's
in midair is awesome I'm a big fan a fastball special using a human being as a projectile
is cool if you want to keep it Dragon Ball there's always the the purple shining attack
or whatever it's called with the with the the the Guinyu Force when I forget that shit when
Jace and Berto Berto team up and spin oh yeah so the purple there he's blue and he's red and
then they spin together and it just becomes a purple blast thing it's the last attack he
does when you have you fought Captain Guinyu no okay well when it's like what he calls them
all in oh yeah no they slam together and then they spin and do the yeah I have okay yeah well
um I'm also gonna say I'm also gonna say a jet stream attack mmm that's always fun in whatever
incarnation it shows up in when a bunch of fucking zaku's just jump on each other's shoulders
and fly at you and it's really silly but it's it's it's cool muscle docking muscle docking so
when King Muscle and Kid Muscle team up to do theirs like like slam finishers they all dock up
together can't believe it's called these slam their two opponents into the ground and like a
friendship train yeah and yeah yeah I'm still kind of blown away at the Kirby friendship train
that that is like it's not called that it is it is you said that it's the friendship wheel or
like or something like that the word train is not I swear I saw a thing like a screenshot
this is friendship this morning I'm not trying this morning but it wasn't called that oh you
called something maybe it was Photoshopped in what I saw Muscle docking is good uh fuck jackpot
jackpot jackpot jackpot jackpot jackpot jackpot and one last one and we'll take it from I'm sure
you said friendship right no he did it he said it I know I said it and he said it maybe once
and I said yeah yeah yeah cuz I knew what he was talking about but the language is missing
time missing time if that makes a difference for me a big fucking screenshot of the friendship
train and Kirby um I'm confused okay all right the snailion train snailion train a friendship
well then maybe I'm just not at the train then yet anyway yeah cuz I'm pretty early in yeah
is this something from later on I don't know I just saw a screenshot of it okay everyone's
friendship train haha like I bet if I go to Twitter right now yeah basically you don't even
have to you don't even have to I don't want to type that in the only thing that'll pop up is Kirby
if anything well it's it's you search for worse well that's different I'm not at work when I
search for that's no breaks on the friendship it's super happening it's super happening so yeah
yeah yeah this is just the start of like LP so you got to find it but friendship train is a term
yeah so anyway uh let's take one here last one I open up Google to see Don gate is EA's new
what up ah nailians is that would have saved yeah hey get that snail gate lights fuck it's
all right Michael wants to know when you when you when you guys challenge someone and call them out
again oh I thought of a good one to challenge max but I don't know if this is the proper venue I
think I think cuz we because we did the last challenge and that's the last I think we should
definitely find others to call out though no I got somebody to call out right now but it's not for
a challenge because they're stupid dumbass you know the last guy was like hey Clems is a foot
loving degenerate he gets that on Twitter it's like oh I wonder what's going on the super best
friend cost oh no pets outed more fetishes and I go you were on my stream and you talked about how
much you love feet you fucking sick old degenerate and he goes oh oh more mistake he outs himself in
his videos super fucking giant full talking shove up my bum yeah I'll fight you Clems I also helped
them fix his stream even though I told him and they took him multiple days to fix it there's that
good there's that that's not that that's not so much challenge we gotta call out somebody that
would just like oh call us right we're gonna call out something like like call out George and
just watch him quake I like buckle I like how in Max's like best of 2017 video for like the
entire year it had the call out when we're at Evo and I took the mic and I was just like well you
know since challenge 300 really for Willie wasn't much of a challenge but like I found a boss in
game that can't be beaten so I want to call that yeah the one I showed you absolutely cannot be
stopped it there's it's real bad it's very he showed it to me and it's a very obscure game and it has
like within the very small knitted community of this fighting game it's called the sergeant the
colonel something the colonel challenge which is just beat the colonel that's it okay but I maybe
track down some videos of people trying very hard and getting very far and then just getting ass
blasted what what's the game it's got two names it's like Kaiser knuckle Kaiser knuckle or another
it's got I forget its other name yeah yeah I know Kaiser knuckle yeah okay he's weak okay they
refuse to play Cruz brothers he refuses to play Cruz brothers yeah I thought Max loves fighting
games now he doesn't I guess like in the middle of his important Broly and Bardock tweets just a
fucking retweet from my from Matt going once again the plebs in your video games refuse to play
the latest and hottest shit but instead dead games like DBZ fighters and smash while we push the end
but then Max and Kenny retweeted that so there's I'm too scared to play Cruz brothers I will tell
everyone we're on the cutting edge of fighting games specifically I think we're on the dull spoon
of fighting games damn I want to say that as a channel we're just hovering over the nation of
Brazil waiting to see what will come with a big vacuum just the moment it gets tossed out like
you finish it's out of the oven you toss it yeah no just call it max all the time fair enough
fair easy the problem to see Max kind of screwed himself on this yeah the problem is is that Max
took the challenges yeah you can just ignore them if you ignore them forever the challenge has
absolutely no power at all but once you take one it's that that shows that you're willing to take
the dumb scummy it's so scum what is coming up and out okay so we got Kotor that's a cool game
we got oh yeah don't worry we're gonna have some of course this is the future we got fire emblem
hashtag Mirage Tokyo Mirage Sessions what that game Sharp Effie Sharp Effie did you know yes that
Tokyo Mirage Sessions is TMS and backwards that's SMT yeah I didn't know that I didn't actually
well no I didn't know that isn't that fucking crazy that's pretty I absolutely knew that but yeah
no Matt and Wally are playing that I wish them the best of luck with their with their
musics and their J-POPs and their performers performa performa and their carnages carnages
it's amazing I played that game for a couple hours the gameplay system in that game is really
wild it is it's proto p5 yeah absolutely um and and we're allowed to play it too so more dead
to rights man made lots of big progress you think a Nintendo cross Atlas yeah would be the
hugest problem they don't care uh yeah dead to rights lots of incomprehensible plot happening
fucking wild ass game lots of lots of dogs um uh delisting bombs what I want to say lots of
getting into the hot zone yeah and oh you know what's coming back this week Wally the juice the
juice is back tomorrow so we'll be finishing up probably Batman the last episode of it is
there's a big to-do about the trailers telltale has been putting out is your Joker going to be a
villain yeah and we know which juice we're good oh yeah we know a flavor so we'll be getting to
that this week guys those trailers are I want to talk to you guys afterwards because those trailers
paint a wildly different picture of the final episode depending which looks actually ambitious
for telltale I read a review of the episode today it's the most that just said this doesn't nail
everything but it's pretty good they're saying they say it's the most um your decisions matter
episode ever it looks like it's two different episodes yeah it's got the hardest branches of
anything which means they basically they finally wrote in a way that um you're allowed to not see
things yeah well that's it's all that's all it ever was is like content creation it's like how
much are we allowed how how what percentage of the game are we gonna allow people not oh yeah I
forgot the Najid was announced for KOF 14 yeah leaving the final silhouette to be a tiny sliver
on that yeah they're blocking that she's a cool shadow girl and she fights in a burka and she cool
yeah I like her and she's one of the fictional fictional dark people that have the white hair
and a race that only exists in anime yeah it's true it's color theory it's the color
wheel you know you go you go see the one color wheel and then you go the opposite end that's
how you that's how you dress your character you know it's a bit cooler than you know you
know it works better than the color what's that what's that um maybe real life I don't know I don't
be real life you're the one running around fucking green hair I know bullshit I know I wish I
fucking wish but it's a fucking unicorn crap and you're fucking hideous land hey don't forget
it don't forget about Kirby games he likes them
whatever did we beat it oh mad stream this week yeah maybe Wednesday and Thursday
my super no no it's done done it for now but there's still a chunk left to do maybe a way out
or something okay sure uh woolly what's coming up on versus anything yeah scrub below our scrub
guides just came out the how to create a game plan in Dragon Ball Fighters there's some general
fighting game tips in there as well that might be of use to some folks but give it a peep and
then uh yeah should be dropping another news report ah so is that gonna be pop off report
too or is it gonna be a different news report should be news combo seven oh we're doing we're
doing the PORN okay all the way through pop off report news oh that's why it's not pop off news
report no it's pop off report news oh okay I oh oh I'm probably gonna stream over to angry's
Pat some more Warframe I'm probably gonna play gone with me sometime this week because I still
don't know what I'm doing he'll help me pick out the prettiest space hats $100 that's deal
that deal uh you got free money I basically got a hundred dollars of free money they had
did you money for nothing actually it was more than a hundred dollars of free money because when
you bought a hundred dollars worth of money they gave you 30% extra money for free just for buying
it so if you bought a hundred dollars of 50% off for the free money and you actually get 80% off so
I actually really old I like I spent a hundred but they gave me back like 220 so it's like I made
$300 the numbers don't lie yeah yeah there's another episode of what happened and the fucking the
noble venture that is browsing the e-shop in the final days that you can load up money onto
to bring a Wiimote today yeah yeah Matt I came in Matt was going under the couch is
stuff trying to find a Wiimote that is a noble endeavor yeah no it was fun because I forgot
there is there is so there is some legit fun stuff on the Wii e-shop so it sucks when a digital
thing goes away it's not going away you just can't put money in so it will go away in another
year yeah but like there's no more buying anything and if and like the point is that those games are
just going to poof until one of the rumors recently that Konami is going to bring back the
rebirth series like Contra rebirth remember we had such a good time playing that friendship
train friend train there it is Kirby has a little creepy train hat on cool yeah I didn't get there
yet I'm sorry I spoiled Kirby no no it's the descriptions that matter you sound like those
fucking assholes it's the getting mad that rambi got shown off in a trailer it doesn't matter
what you see in a screen I'm saying I'm saying you can't spoil it it's when you pause and you
read the screen that yeah that's what matters oh my god I hate that's where all the lore is
I hate it Pat the lore is on the pause screen it finish the podcast did you see the happiest
one yet that they've ever done it was amazing the happiest what the happiest fucking like
pause screen lore ever did I was Kirby himself uh-huh using Kirby Kirby is super proud of
you and he understands that some days things are hard but he believes in you and he knows
you will do great just keep trying you are Kirby's hero man that's some loser shit for
babies that's amazing Kirby does isn't that smart we're out Kirby's like four years old
sometimes four year olds have the greatest wisdom fuck off it's wholesome