CheapShow - Ep 358: CheapShow Does Leighton Night
Episode Date: November 10, 2023It's the second of three episodes recorded in Los Angeles and this week they are joined by Brian Wecht and Leighton Gray, the hosts of the rather lovely "Leighton Night with Brian Wecht"! In a change ...to the usual format for both shows, Paul and Eli will be filling their episode with Leighton Night content and offering their own takes on that show's segments. They'll be dishing out "peaches and lemons", leaning harder on the lemons (annoying things) than on the peaches (lovely things) and telling everyone "What's Poppin?". True to Leighton Night's format, Paul will go all in on this particular gimmick! Eli just about remembers to turn up. How will Brian and Leighton fare when they get their own segments thrown right back in their faces? Find out this week! BONUS: You'll be able to see how Part Two of this cross-over podcast event pans out by listening to "Ep 193 Leighton Night Does CheapShow" of Leighton Night with Brian Wecht on all participating podcast platforms! Alt CheapShow Theme by @noiselund See pics/videos for this episode on our website: https://www.thecheapshow.co.uk/ep-358-cheapshow-does-leighton-night And if you like us, why not support us: www.patreon.com/cheapshow If you want to get involved, email us at thecheapshow@gmail.com And if you want to, follow us on Twitter/X @thecheapshowpod or @paulgannonshow & @elisnoid And discover "Leighton Night with Brian Wecht" with @bwecht & @graylish @leightonnight www.thecheapshow.co.uk Now on Threads: @cheapshowpod Like, Review, Share, Comment... LOVE US! MERCH Official CheapShow Merch Shop: www.redbubble.com/people/cheapshow/shop www.cheapmag.shop Thanks also to @vorratony for the wonderful, exclusive art: www.tinyurl.com/rbcheapshow NEW ART: Get hold of Spunk.Rock’s exclusive CheapShow 300 Artwork: https://www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/CHEAPSHOW-EST-2016-by-spunkrock/115961855.WFLAH.XYZ www.instagram.com/spunk__rock Send Us Stuff: CheapShow PO BOX 1309 Harrow HA1 9QJ
Transcript
Discussion (0)
What?
Come here.
I'm here.
They're not here yet.
I don't know if they're around.
Well, let's do a little thing.
Hello, everybody.
It's Cheap Show.
Look, we're in Los Angeles.
And look, Brian's not around, or Leighton.
So I thought, look, all their equipment's out.
And look, they've got this really cool equipment over there.
And it's a fancy sound machine.
So I thought we'd just use it.
What, should we just fart?
No, we can't do that.
Let's fart in the mic.
On the mic?
A rosy, rosy button on the mic.
Let's leave a...
Dirty brown, rosy button on the mic.
Shall we do that?
Let's leave an air biscuit on the mic.
All right.
Let's leave...
Hello, ladies and gentlemen.
Here's an air biscuit.
Hey, y'all.
Hey.
I've got a whole tray of chutney biscuits.
Ooh.
Ooh, it's an air tray.
Come on.
I'm playing air hockey with a chutney biscuit.
Right, yeah.
Chutney puck.
Let's do it.
Let's do it.
Hello.
Hello, Open Achieve show.
It's Paul Gannon and Eli Silverman in LA doing a naughty secret episode in someone's studio
who you shouldn't be in here.
I've got a huge double width chutney puck.
So look.
Yeah.
So don't tell them.
What are we doing though?
No, we'll just do the same old shit.
It's fine.
I've got some bits and bobs that we've had on the way.
So bits and bobs.
They're going to be outside planning their own fucking stupid podcast.
They're fucking stupid.
One thing.
One thing.
Don't over-egg the bacon today.
Okay?
Don't over-egg the bacon.
Have you got chutney biscuits?
Fuck off.
Don't you dare.
Don't.
Don't you fucking dare.
Dare what?
Just concentrate and let's get this done before they come back.
Do what?
You can't just say chutney biscuits for a bit.
And then I said to her...
No, no, no.
Absolutely fucking not.
What?
I thought you were
doing your own thing
next door.
No.
I thought you were
hotboxing in here.
No.
You said you were just, quote,
coming into the chill zone
to chill a little.
We're chill.
We're chill.
We're chilling and recording.
We're not what you're recording.
Turn that off quick.
I can see it.
It's my recording studio.
God damn it. Look.
You can ask.
Okay, yes, you've got us. Right? Fine.
We thought we'd use your space because it's all fancy
with your Atmos surround sound recording and all that stuff.
Okay, now, it's not Atmos, technically. It's a knockoff.
All right, well, either way.
Atmos, it was invented by cows. That's why there's two O's.
Anyway, look, listen, sorry, we apologize.
If you want us to go, we'll go. We just thought, oh, I can stay.
I don't want you to go. I do want
to check your audio to make sure you're not peaking
because you told me you wouldn't be this loud. You promised
me you wouldn't be this loud. Yeah, you immediately started shouting.
You immediately started shouting. Why is your mic technique
so terrible? How dare fucking you?
Okay. This is the king of
I can't speak anywhere near to a microphone
when I'm being quiet, but when I'm loud, I'm the
furthest away. See, you've made him get up now.
You've made him get up to peek.
Oh, so it's my fault.
He's peaking.
Because I'm boisterous.
He's got up to peek.
I've got a sneaky peeker.
Look at that.
Look at that waveform.
Look at that.
That's a man's waveform.
Look at that.
That's a waveform of a strong man with a deep voice
that can make ladies shudder in the panties.
I'm sorry.
Wow.
Wow. I had to get up just to go peek peek a little on the corner look listen hey how about a compromise how about we share the space and we
and we do a podcast together all right how about that you know what i'm into it all right yeah all
right and let me suggest this and i really want to say this is not a put on we did not plan this out
under no circumstances was this a bit
that we sculpted before the show this wasn't contrived at all no this wasn't trapped no i
think there's a distinct lack of contrivance about this whole situation it's audio verite
like some stockhausen type stuff isn't it let's do the whole peanut butter in my chocolate
chocolate in my peanut butter how about don't you dare correct me you don't whole peanut butter in my chocolate, chocolate in my peanut butter. How about don't you dare correct me on this. You don't have peanut butter in the UK, and I fucking know that.
We do.
I live there.
We've got plenty of peanut butter.
How dare you?
We are a peanut butter and proud country.
That is not true.
It is.
We've got Reese's.
You should draw a line across the table.
When I eat Star Bars.
Star Bars.
They're peanut butter snacks.
I'm sorry.
We pronounce the R's here in Star Bars.
Don't put R's in the words if you're not going to say them.
Star-a-bar.
That's a Scottish start.
Scar-bar.
Scar-bar.
It's deep fried if it's Scottish.
Hey!
Airplane food.
Right, well, all that said and done,
welcome to Cheap Show.
Roll the credits.
Press the fucking credits.
Pop, rum, rum, dom.
Pop, rum, rum, dom.
Paul, Paul Gannon.
Eli Silverman.
Welcome to the Jeep Show.
Sources and words and phrases.
Two things I'm responsible for.
Chodney.
Chodney Boroff.
I hate you.
You're a fucking loser. Posse. Jeep Show time. Chodney, Chodney Borough. I hate you, I've got to be moved with posse.
Cheap Show Time!
Cheap Show Time!
It's the price of shine!
Cheap Show Time!
Welcome to Cheap Show.
Hello everybody, it's Cheap Show Time and I am Paul Gannon.
Oh look, there's a camera filming us.
There's a camera right there.
There's a camera filming us.
Hello everybody, I'm Paul Gannon, this is Cheap Show and with me as always is...
Eli Silverman, hi everyone.
We are the Economy Comedy Podcast where we usually go for the charity shops, bargain bins and pound lands of Great Britain.
But instead we've been going through the thrift stores, goodwill, and Dollar Trees of Los Angeles while we've been here.
And we thought we'd have a bit of fun with special guests today.
I Dollar Tree.
You know what?
As soon as he said Dollar Tree, I was like, I never put together, because we pronounce that R again, not to harp on this.
I never put together that as part of the word I Dollar Tree.
But it definitely is.
Back when Dollar Tree was actually a dollar,
that's definitely how I felt about it.
Yeah, we have pound lands that no longer stock things that I pound.
Are you too hot?
I've always said that.
Sorry, did you just say they no longer stock things that I pound?
Well, I'm glad.
Yeah, no, you're right.
I used to fuck their big-
They've stocked their sex toys.
You know, but that's-
They did have a discount range of sex toys
in our Dollar Tree equivalent.
No, really?
I can't say palm lap without thinking of sex.
Wait, wait, wait.
This is true?
Yeah, they did.
What did they have?
Give me some examples.
A cock ring, we did it, didn't we?
A vibrating cock ring.
Only 10p.
It was a quid.
A quid.
Everything was a quid.
You could have a full orgy for a fiver.
That's the great thing about it.
Vibrators, little bullet vibrators.
Okay, for a pound.
They had Viagra knockoffs.
How much were the vibrators?
All a pound.
Okay.
I don't know.
I hate to impress-
How much were the Viagra knockoffs?
They were all a pound.
I mean, I don't know what else you need me to say other than it was all a pound.
Uh-huh.
And what else?
We had something else.
That's a British expression for when a lot of people are having sex.
It's things are all a pound in this room, right?
It's all a pounding.
Yeah.
Take you to Pound Town,
which is not the same as Pound Land.
Pound Town is where you take the ladies.
Yeah, no.
Or the gentlemen, if that so tickles your fancy.
Pound Town has a whole municipal structure
that Pound Land doesn't quite possess, right?
I don't think they have a local government.
Right, I was going to ask.
Yeah, no.
But they do have a mayor.
I'm the mayor of Pound Town. I don't know how you think of government. Right, I was going to ask. Yeah, no. But they do have a mayor. I'm the mayor of Poundtown.
I don't know how you could be that way.
Actually, yeah.
I don't know why being in America
has made you go all Bruiser and the Randy Dog.
Bruce, that's your morning show.
Bruiser and the Randy Dog.
You're the Randy Dog.
That is true.
We need air horns in here.
Yes, we do.
Oh, I wish I had set up the little sound board
air horn
oh yeah
can we do
can I do a live action sound board
every time you high five me
I'll say oh yeah
oh yeah
every time I look at the camera
every time you look at the camera
so we thought we'd do
something different today
because we were talking
amongst ourselves
and we thought
what would be a lot of fun
is if we did your segments
for a change and you did ours and it's going to be shock surprise
a two-part episode wow what will begin here will end on late keep on saying late night but it's
just late night with brian wecht late night with brian wecht it's late at night it is late night
yes that's the pun bollocks late night is what you know it's okay yeah you've only been on the
show twice, Paul.
I understand why you wouldn't understand its name.
I think we're all aware that my brain is a malfunctioning product
that I cannot get a receipt to ref...
Oh, fuck my mouth.
Welcome, YouTube.
Oh, yeah.
Welcome. Welcome to Cheap Show.
How about we let them introduce themselves properly?
Go on, Leighton, introduce yourself.
Hi, I'm Leighton Gray.
I am the co-host of Late Night and Why There Is a Leighton in the title. Correct. Go on, Leighton, introduce yourself. Hi, I'm Leighton Gray. I am the co-host of Leighton Knight and why there is a Leighton in the title.
Correct.
My name is Brian Wecht and I am the with Brian Wecht portion of Leighton Gray.
I'm also in the band's what?
You're the Brian Wecht portion of Leighton Gray?
Yes.
Oh, you know what?
That was not intentional.
Of Leighton Knight.
And I'm in the band's Ninja Sex Party and Starbomb.
And you might know me from those.
Oh, I was supposed to do Bonafides?
You can.
I make video games.
Yeah, but which one?
Tell us.
Yeah, which one did you make?
Dream Daddy, a dad dating simulator.
And also the new survival horror puzzle game Homebody,
available now on Steam and wherever else you get your games.
And apparently they're very well rated.
But because we don't have fancy game consoles,
we'll never play them. Well, it won't be a phone. we don't have fancy game consoles we'll never play them.
Well it won't be a phone
you don't do phone stuff.
Dream Daddy is on mobile
and both of those games
are on Switch
so you really have no excuse.
Oh okay well then
I'll get the other one
on Switch
because Dream Daddy
eeks me out.
I look like those
dating games
they eek me out.
It eeks me out.
Two things you said
that are meaningless there.
It eeks me out
and it eeks me out. I said eeks both times I didn't say it eeks me out and it eats me out i said eeks both
time i didn't say it eats me out can you look at the game developer again and tell her that
her game eeks you out you're not i mean that's not a nice thing specifically the genre of dating
story sim things is an eking game situation i'm saying paul's i would not have said if i were a
guest in somebody's home and studio and had broken into this studio to record your show when we were scheduled to record.
That's right.
I would not look this person in the eye and insult them.
You won't make eye contact with me.
I won't make eye contact with you.
We're both in a non-eye contact situation.
As we know, I do want to establish that when you express a slight criticism of somebody's work, that is a direct insult to them personally.
We Americans take it very personally.
I would say it's indirect,
because even though I haven't played the game,
I do think the genre overall ekes me out, all right?
Okay, fine.
Whereas horror games are much more my bag baby,
and I'll be looking forward to that.
All right?
Happy?
Oh, did you leave your bag baby here?
Someone had my baby.
Oh, yeah.
You left your bag, baby.
Pick up your bag, baby.
I'm going to give you such a slapping.
We've never done the part one, part two thing before.
And I can't think of anyone I'd rather do it with.
I'm so excited that we're doing this.
I'm glad that you've decided to lower your standards to have us here in the first place.
Thank you both.
The cheapest people we could get. Do your thing about chocolate and peanut butter i've done that and
it didn't work and i'd rather not go back there can i just ask you one thing about that when you
said chocolate and peanut butter were you setting those up as an opposition to each other like it's
a phrase no it's a phrase because there's an advert isn't it in your state about uh reese's
pieces yeah so there was an old uh reese's ad in
the 80s you know you got your chocolate and my peanut butter you got my your peanut butter my
chocolate which is the interesting thing to me is that it's a false dichotomy right it was set up
like these things should be in opposition when as we all know they aren't and it's not like anyone
was separating them you know at a distance with great effort right they're two kind of interesting tastes that, yes, in fact, do go very well together.
But I don't think this was a huge surprise.
And everyone knew that.
And that was my problem organically arising from you saying chocolate and peanut butter.
So you have a problem with me using a phrase that was known in the common parlance for
an advertising brand to elucidate the point of what we're doing today.
That's not the only problem I have with you, Paul.
Well, here, we'll run with this.
In this paradigm, who's the chocolate and who's the peanut butter?
Oh, I like this.
I think we're the peanut butter because we're both nuts.
Yeah.
Thanks, everybody. That's been laid down.
We're nuts.
Oh, yeah.
White chocolate. We could form a band.
White chocolate.
I like that a lot. That's great.
White chocolate. I don't know.
It reeks of racism, that band name.
I'm sorry.
I was going to say, be very careful what you say right now.
Right.
So here's what I thought we'd do.
Because we're swapping segments, why don't you give our listenership an idea of what
you will do and that we will be doing today in lieu of what you usually do.
Oh, sure.
So on our episode of Late Night, which is out now, we will be doing the segments Cheap Eats.
Oh.
And where, do we need to tell people what they are?
No, they know what Cheap Eats is.
I was actually hoping you'd tell about your segments
that we'll be doing.
Oh, oh, oh.
Yeah, you really fumbled the bag, Brian.
Well, again, we didn't plan this.
You fumbled the bag, baby.
Do you want me to introduce our segments?
No, just tell them what you usually do.
Conceptually, I really don't understand what's happening right now.
He does this.
It's gone mind meld already, hasn't it?
What am I supposed to do?
Precisely.
Be very specific.
I would like you to specifically.
Just tell me exactly what I'm supposed to do,
and then I will happily do it.
I will happily follow your instructions.
No, he won't.
No, he won't. No, he won't.
Everyone just shut up for a second.
Don't fall for this.
Yeah, please, please.
My house, my rules.
My house, my rules.
Just be very specific and polite.
Polite.
I do have to emphasize this.
Polite.
And I will follow your instructions.
I'd like a kiss on the willy.
I'm so sorry.
I want a willy kiss.
Don't start this, Paul.
What? He said he'd do anything oh yeah
okay now what do you want me to do i don't want you to do anything anymore
ask me i'm also here yeah layton why don't you please explain the usual segments that you do
in your show that we'll be doing today instead.
But without introducing them.
Yes.
Okay, great.
All right, so we do two different segments on the show.
We do some others, but with absolutely no regularity.
The first one is called What's Poppin', where everybody gets to share a pop culture recommendation,
something they've been enjoying lately, book, movie, TV, especially if it's unpopular or very old, as is often the case in Brian's picks.
I am very old.
I was going to say it describes you almost perfectly, right?
Decrepit.
And our second segment,
our second segment is called Peaches and Lemons,
which is a three-part gratitude exercise
and one part petty grousing,
where we all say like a minor bummer or annoyance,
and then we do three really nice things.
Yeah.
Okay.
I think grousing, that's good.
I haven't used that in years.
I think I've only ever
seen that written down in fact well grouse is something we have in britain that's right it's
a game bird yes yes pick out the the pellets of lead from this game bird yeah but you used uh
shark right buckshot or something yeah yeah poor old like a pheasant it's like a pheasant but a
completely different species of bird so it's not like a pheasant then but you can buy them and eat
them right you can and you know what every time i've seen my dad recently he goes on about
the grouse the grouse season he's american so obviously he he always big on fetishizes sort of
britishness well you're i believe in in in the uk right you guys your your looney tunes version of
duck season wabbit season was
grouse season, coney season. Yes, yes.
Quail. That's another one. Alright, do you have
any more random birds you'd like to just say
out loud? Yeah, I do actually.
Go on. Swift, that's one.
Robin. Blue tit.
No, it's just the way the t-shirt's hanging off
my shoulders.
Now we need
a trombone sound effect. We're not going to have one of them. If you pull my finger, I'll do the trombone sound effect we're not going to have one of them pull my finger
i'll do the trump tempted right well i'll tell you what then let's crack on and we'll do it's
popping all right how about that what was the name of that segment again it's popping i don't
wait aren't you guys two time two time get're doing our segments, and we're doing their segments.
Okay. Why haven't you been briefed later?
Did your co-hosts not tell you what was going on?
No, no.
This is exactly why I was confused and wanted explicit instructions from you, sir.
Well, this goes to show that you don't listen to our podcast, because this is what happens
every single week on our show.
Should I try and clear this up?
Why?
What have you done on the floor?
Is that the white chocolate again?
There's some paper towels over there.
Yeah, please. Dirty boy. Bad dog. Rain in the end of the pier, okay? Come on, horny dog. you done on the floor is that the white chocolate there's some paper towels over there yeah please
dirty boy rain in the end of the pier okay come on horny dog bring it in come on randy dog right
what was the other one look the bruiser yeah i like well i suddenly know what this week's episode
is called bruiser and the randy dog um and also and Eli. Yes. We are doing a Mirror World version of both of our respective podcasts.
Yes.
Starting with our pod where we'll be doing Late at Night with Brian Wex.
Thank you.
Two main segments.
Correct.
They're regular segments, not their occasional segments.
What's this grabbing action you're doing?
I'm really unsettled.
I'm an expressive man.
Yeah?
I'm an expressive man.
That's not an expression so much as a threat so we'll be welcome to america yes that's all i can say
about anyway we're now doing how's the poppin the segment of the show that i don't know like
so let's get into it right so i thought i'd do a little intro right for this segment because
some people out there might not know what poppin. That's great. I love it. Before we get any further, I want to dig into the very idea of popping.
I don't know.
I mean, first of all, I decided to look up popping.
So I went to dictionary.com, and apparently popping is an adjective.
What was that word?
Well, popping.
It's an adjective.
We can't talk about my mouth fart noises, kind of tongue fumbles.
Adjective.
Well, the thing is, I never know when it's...
I'm not going to ask you...
I'm going to have to ask you to step back while I do this introduction
because it's really important I get through this.
We've got a lot to get through.
You know what?
I fully understand where you're coming from.
I need you to step back.
I need you to find...
This is our show right now.
Can I apologize first?
No.
I would like you to save up all the apologies for the end of the show
and just give me one big one.
Very well.
All right.
That's all right.
This show will be nothing but you apologizing.
So, I looked up what poppin' means
and apparently,
according to dictionary.com,
when used as an adjective,
poppin' is a synonym for awesome,
popular, or fresh,
especially prominent in US black slang.
Did you know that?
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Well, it's a clip form of poppin',
dropping the final G,
a common feature
of African-American vernacular English.
Poppin' had taken on a meaning in black slang around the 1940s when it was referred to as a lavish
and reckless use of spending.
1940s? Okay, I didn't know that.
Can you interrupt me again? I need to just step back while I'm doing this.
No, look, I do understand, if anybody, Paul, understands what it's like to introduce a
segment and to be constantly...
I'm still going to have to...
Hold on, hold on. Just hold on one second. If anyone understands what it's like to introduce a segment all right well i'm still gonna hold on hold on just hold on just hold on one second okay uh if anyone understands what it's like to introduce a segment and be
constantly interrupted by one's co-host it's me well i'm so i do apologize i'm gonna need you to
back up on that i also need you to back up on that get back to reading your shit thank you very much
i mean it's weird that i'm getting more help from you than him and him and i either way i'm also
here you're not really um anybody to back off yet, by the way.
The usage has somewhat survived into modern-day hip-hop music
as popping pills or bottles is a common slang
for doing recreational drugs and drinking recklessly
as a result of having too much money to know what to do with.
This is nonsense.
It's what the dictionary.com says.
Now, break out with Poppin's popularity.
I'm just going to carry on going.
As a modern term came back in 2007.
In quick succession, after three major hip-hop artists
charted with songs with Poppin in either the title or the hook.
Chris Brown's Poppin, which reached number 15
on the Billboard charts in March 2007.
Little Mama's Lip Gloss, which peaked at number 16 in June 2007.
What does that have got to do with Poppin'?
TI's Big Things Poppin' Do It,
which reached nine in the charts in August 2007.
In these songs, Poppin' conveyed happening,
bustling with exciting activity
and extended to a kind of effortless cool.
Google searches for Poppin'
A real Brian Weck type of thing.
hit their all-time high in July 2007
when usage of the word poppin'
became popular because of these songs.
Since then, poppin' has become a phrase
to describe things such as new, fresh, or happening.
I just thought I'd do a little bit more research
on the basis of this.
I learned a lot from that.
I also learned a lot.
We've been culturally appropriating this whole time.
I mean, I didn't want to bring that awkward moment up,
but it is true.
No, it's important to know.
I also thought, not just your podcast,
but I've heard the word popping around,
such as you may have heard of this,
Poppin' Fresh, the Pillsbury Doughboy
from the Pillsbury company
that like to make cakes and pies and pastries
and all those kind of lovely things.
What's this segment about?
Now, this is more effort you put into your own podcast.
Yes, it is.
He's been writing this down for...
I went to sleep.
The Pillsbury Doughboy began in 1965
and was used in advertising campaigns
right up until 2017.
Really?
If he touched his belly,
he would go,
hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo.
Don't touch me during the recordings.
Don't touch me during the recordings.
However, after a scandal...
Wait, if I poke you,
will you make the noise?
Yeah.
Ow.
So, unfortunately, after 2017, he was retired due to a drink and drugs.
Did he die?
No, there was a drink and drugs scandal that happened with the Learpack Butter Men.
You may not know that, but it was a big thing over in the UK.
Are you being funny?
By the way, look, I understand why you didn't poke my belly,
but I think it was a cop-out that you didn't poke my belly.
But I'm not saying you're unjustified.
Here we go.
You're a human soundboard.
You can maybe hear the phrase popping in the word.
Popping candy, which is made by heating sucrose, lactose, and corn syrup until it's hot and molten.
CO2 is then bubbled through the molten liquid at a pressure of 600 PSI,
which is actually several times the pressure of a
champagne bottle it was then cooled rapidly to prevent gas escaping around and as the candy
solidifies eating it releases the gases when it comes into contact with the moisture in your mouth
of course as we mentioned before pill popping it's what people do when they tend to have too
many drugs or they enjoy taking drugs see the the earlier reference to Poppin' Fresh.
Is that it?
And the Pillsbury Doughboy.
But no, we also got Pimple Poppin'.
This is a bad word.
Sorry, I might just interject for a moment here.
Yeah, you can try, but I'm just going to keep on going.
When you introduce the What's Poppin' segment, you really do have to do a bunch of work to get it to the place you want.
And only about five or ten minutes in is when it really starts getting good.
Some people find this usually quite relaxing,
but ultimately, no.
You tend to find that it's a gross thing that most people do.
Sorry, Leighton, can you just hold off?
I'm trying to do a thing right now.
Hey, shut the fuck up, Brian.
We've got Wikipedia's disambiguation list of all the pop-in pages.
Sorry.
Oh, my God.
Fucking ridiculous.
Mary Poppin, who is a stripper in Benidorm.
Her hair act involved using a ping pong ball
and a member of the audience
with a Dixie cup
I have no more information
on that
however more recently
it has been used
in the reasonably well known
podcast
Late in Night
where the co-host
I forget his name
uses the phrase
as a title for the show segment
and like most white people
in the entertainment industry
he has co-opted the phrase
for his own means and uh
uses it to do protracted and elongated intros that everyone tunes out of and people should have
moved on from before but now we finally at the end of all that get to the segment that they like to
call what's popping i was doing a pause then i you were doing a pause to remember sir that was
that was that was that was
great you've beat him at his own game and that's all we got time for this week next week yeah the
crucial thing on our show is to to stretch out the introduction so long that we can no longer
record the rest of the episode which i think you've we're almost there with that i think i
mean i've lost all the will to carry on with this now so brian what did you think of the theme i
mean the introduction for what's popping i i respect the hustle is what i want to say about this like i i i appreciate that paul put in a lot
of work more work than other co-hosts tend to put into to this podcast and uh and really what i like
about what he did about this so i have a couple points to say that's great great to hear no i
thought he did i thought he did the research really well I have a couple points to say. That's great. Great to hear from you, Brian. I thought he did the research really well.
Who has a pop-in?
Who has a fucking pop-in?
For the love of God,
don't fall over, Paul.
I thought that was really good.
Where's he going?
He's just leaving.
He's just mad.
You don't need me.
I could do this this whole time.
I can just leave?
You can just leave.
He actually left.
That's amazing.
No, one of the things,
one of the,
it was a fake walkout. it was a fake walkout.
It was a fake walkout.
No balls.
Doing all the old gold standards.
Fake walkouts have been a part of Cheap Show.
While you're over there,
make sure that's still recording.
Something to do with Pornhub?
Pornhub?
No, that's my free site.
Paul's fake walkouts have been a
legendary,
irritating aspect of our show
since before Cheap Show was a a thing it's one of the
many tropes you'll probably find that he does one thing before we go into the second segment proper
yeah did you see that popping candy he put it on his dick and he was injured apparently
what are we talking about it was was him, obviously. Yeah.
No, because, you know, unlike here in the UK, you're not automatically circumcised.
So a lot of men do have the windsock in place.
Yeah.
Okay.
Check, check, check.
And apparently someone put some popping candy in there and it, you know.
In his foreskin.
Yes.
Underneath the hood.
Yes.
Wow.
And it did its thing here
here in the u.s we'd call that pop cocks i almost bought some today do you like popping candy no no
i've always find it if i'm around like a child who has some and wants to give me some i'll happily
toss it back but have you seen these egg things there's we've we've covered it on a show. This is a Japanese confectionery stroke toy product
where they take popping candy.
You've got a damp candy egg.
Gummy egg kind of thing.
It's damp.
Gotta love a damp candy.
Damp candy.
And a little plastic facsimile frying pan.
And what you do, they give you a packet of
popping candy put it in the frying pan then you take out your damn peg and you put it on top of
it wow and don't insult my damn peg that's all i'm gonna say it's my peg and i fashioned it
and then it makes the noise as the popping candle reacts it sounds like the egg is frying
in the little pan that's cool it's a big thing. You see them everywhere. Yeah.
I've seen at least two different sizes of egg. I bet we could get that here in some of the, like, Little Tokyo.
Well, yeah, I've definitely gotten that little market that's in Little Tokyo has the, like,
you mix the gelatin and you can make your own little candies and stuff.
Yes, it's very much of that ilk.
Do they taste good?
No.
But is it fun?
Yes.
Because they are more toy than food.
Well, what fucking segment were we doing anyway?
Okay, so the next segment on this show,
No.
Who does the popping?
So if we've done the introduction and you're the guest,
shouldn't you be doing the popping?
But I guess we're doing the popping?
You're doing the popping.
You introduced it so you get to pick.
All right, okay.
Body popping, that's a thing I used to do.
I should have written that down, mate.
Give me five seconds.
The way we do it is we'll say,
blank, what's popping?
And this is usually after a very long and protracted thing,
and then Brian immediately throws it to me,
which leaves me speechless most of the time.
Right.
Because she can't handle how great the introduction was usually.
But what's popping with us?
No, I mean, literally.
You wrote it down.
Remember?
You wrote it down because you said, give me that fucking pen.
I'll write this down.
And then, well, now you seem to be like, oh, what's popping?
Yes, but do you know what the reason was I wrote it down?
As a sort of memo.
There were two things.
Remember the two things.
Remember the two things.
Because you wanted to talk about that fucking thing.
And I thought I'd talk about that fucking thing.
We've got two things that are popping, guys.
Great.
Because it's pop culture popping.
Are you going to pop together?
Yeah.
We often pop together. Traditionally, you ask the guests what's popping first and seeing as we're
okay well let's do what's popping what's popping for me is the woman in me by britney spears
slash ghost writer oh that's the memoir yeah yeah i just read it it's an easy read it's very
simple uh and it was a nice little dive into you know some 2000s history
and just boy has that lady gone through a lot of shit and she's an icon what's the tone of it
though i mean when you when you put the book down what's your lingering feeling about britney as a
person well i read it in one sitting um it was very. Um, but I did appreciate the like context.
Cause I think everybody's kind of seen her post conservatorship, like Instagram posts.
It's just a lot of her dancing and weird outfits.
And I feel like how much of this is ghostwriter and how much of this is Brittany, but her
saying that like, she just wants to be silly and to be able to sexualize herself after
years of other people doing it to her.
Like it's something that she can control.
And have fun doing.
So I will choose to believe that.
It was a nice little read.
Is she planning on doing any more music?
What do you think she does next?
I think she's pretty done.
Wow.
She wants to do stuff for herself.
But yeah, like she goes into how crazy her schedule was when she was a teenager.
I can't even imagine. yeah so because i know this is probably a stupid question but she's made enough money to live comfortably right or or i mean i don't know well yes it goes into a
lot of like the way that she was exploited through the conservatorship and how much of
her money was taken from her like she had a a stipend of 2000 bucks a week while her family members were
getting paid like millions of dollars.
Yeah.
They just like used her as a cash cow is kind of what you see through the
book.
Horrible.
See,
I heard a thing.
Baby hit me one more time.
The video was sort of.
Do it.
Use.
I thought you were going to hit him.
Oh,
sorry.
Brian,
please.
I'll get enough of that.
Honestly. I apologize. Now when Eli. Look. Oh, sorry. Brian, please. I'll get enough of that, honestly.
I apologize.
Now, when Eli...
Don't look at me like that.
I have to say, when Eli reprimands me, I take it seriously.
I apologize for my actions.
Wow, thank you.
I'm very sorry.
I find that insulting.
Guys, personally speaking...
Paul, Paul, he asked us to stop.
Yeah, but I don't listen to him because I know I have no respect for him.
The fact that you have respect for him troubles me.
It's because I don't know him as well as I know you.
I think that the imaginary line that split us as, you know, different podcasts, I think it has gone diagonally.
It's crossed over, yeah.
Where you two, I don't know what you two are on.
Eli and I, we're cool.
We are so cool.
No, don't do it.
Don't do it.
I was never going to let him leave you hanging.
That's a bad thing.
Anyway, you were saying?
That video was sort of discussed as extremely exploitative and sexualized.
But then I heard the story that she had choreographed it and decided on the costumes herself.
Is that true?
Yeah.
She had a lot of creative input.
They were going to do... Fuck. on the costumes herself is that true uh yeah she says she had a lot of creative input they were gonna do uh fuck what's the other song that actually has the music video where she's like
in space not oops i did it again toxic no that's the airplane one okay idiot stupid fucking fool
anyway but that was the initial concept for the baby one more time video and then she was like i
want to do it in a school you know that was her move but it's
also she talks a lot about how she was constantly getting accused of you know being a bad influence
and being sexualized but she was just like existing yeah um and getting like constantly
shamed and then like the breakup with justin timberlake and the way it was just like a six
and like kevin federline like it was just the string of people using her for clout and then, you know, tossing her away.
Terrible.
Would you recommend the book to people casually interested in her life?
Yeah, totally.
Because it's incredibly readable.
I hoped that I would have had a cooler, less mainstream thing to pop here.
No, but it's still fascinating because I think there's still a kind of, not a fake thing, but it's like the media's version of who she is yes and i think
it does a lot to counter that because didn't you say we were in that bookshop that's what i was
gonna say we were in book book um book soup book soup great store in uh in hollywood the other day
and they were selling the memoir and this um incredibly camp man came in and said
i'm not gonna do the voice i'm not gonna do the voice i'm not gonna do the voice i think that's incredibly camp man came in and said in a very...
I'm not going to do the voice.
I'm not going to do the voice.
I think that's a wise move, to be honest.
He basically said, oh, I'm here for the
Britney memoir, of course.
Of course I am. It was apparent,
basically. As if why else would he walk into
a bookshop? But the staff had been discussing
selling it all day. It must have come out
the other day.
Brian, just out of interest,'s popping well paul eli thank you for asking i'm gonna pop something this week that we were talking about earlier in the day and uh you didn't know but
i've talked about on the show ad nauseum but i want to talk about it on your show laden can you
turn around and hand me that that album, that vinyl right there?
Oh, it's bloody Rumors by Fleetwood Mac.
It is not.
By the way, I might be the only person in the world,
I do not like Rumors by Fleetwood Mac.
It does nothing for me.
I'm going to pop this beautiful Al Jarreau album
from, what is it?
I want to make sure I get the right, 81, Breaking Away.
So this is...
Play the camera, for the love of God.
I was looking at the date first.
There it is.
Break it away.
Boom.
Look at Al Jarreau.
Al Jarreau might be,
might be my favorite person in the world.
Like he cut to me being made aware of a million indiscretions.
Yeah.
But he,
he's such a great singer.
He is,
I think the prime example of so uncool.
He's fucking cool. cool yeah you need to flip
that album and show the camera the backside look at this they said can you do a shot where you look
like you're yawning yeah and then we'll do that one look at this fucking guy he's so awesome he's
such a great singer this album is like non-stop session like magicians it's the it's like
crystalline production uh it's i don't even know what you'd call it.
It's not quite jazz, but it's jazz adjacent for sure.
It's just like yacht rock, the pinnacle of yacht rock.
I love it so much.
If you had to pick one track to say, listen to this and see if you like it, what would you recommend?
I think the first track, Closer to Your Love, is my favorite for sure.
I really like Roof Garden, though.
That's a really fun one.
He does a, for all you Brubeck heads out there,
he does a version of Blue Rondo a la Turk with lyrics,
which are all about music, which is such a poor choice,
but it's so great.
I genuinely love this album ¶¶
Is he still around?
No, he died a few years back, maybe in 2017.
Yeah, okay.
So unfortunately, the other, yeah, I just love this album and its follow-up, Jero, so much.
This guy is kind of one of my musical heroes.
Is he more of a cult hit than a mainstream?
Obviously, he's not mainstream, but was he?
He was very mainstream at the time.
Oh, okay.
He did the theme song for Moonlighting, famously.
Really?
Yeah.
I have a question for you.
There's another record for those who aren't on the respective Patreons. This is a good co-host right here.
This is what I'm not sure about talk to talk to me about the the influences here so this is my upcoming smooth
jazz record which may be out already by the time this episode is jesus trey magnifique mature
situations uh and honestly design wise i just use this i when i was working with a designer
i had this picture of me in a white suit, which is kind of morally similar to the Al Jarrell one.
Morally similar?
Yeah, morally similar.
And I used this as a style comp to the designer I was working with,
and I said, I want something kind of with this general color scheme.
So that's where we came up with this.
Yeah, we didn't want to go for the tear away. I think you dropped the ball there.
Aspect.
I didn't want to copy it exactly.
It's the vibe.
It's the moral vibe.
Yeah.
Now, have you seen the inner sleeve of this, Leighton?
I don't know if I have.
You know what?
You've done this wrong.
You should have been topless on at least one of those images.
That's so true.
There we go.
Show us the color of the record. The vinyl. great vinyl the vinyl is oh now that's nice i like
blazingly white there it is cocaine cocaine in a latrine on a yacht white there it is that's
exactly right so yeah when's that out then that is out uh november 10th oh so you can get it for
thanksgiving or christmas presents or just for Thanksgiving or Christmas presents or just for, you know,
people who like music. Just for yourself, just to
admire pictures of me. These are really, really
great shots taken by a professional photographer.
I can easily imagine me spilling
my load all over the front of that
on a lone, cold, dark
winter's night. You know, the upsetting part
to me is I can also imagine you doing that.
We can all. I wish we were.
I want us to all imagine me ejaculating on your hard work.
No, we did get a little preview of some of the tracks,
and I have to say, really loved it.
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
May I drop a 30-second clip in now?
Yeah, sure. Thank you. that was it
all jokes aside
get your hands on it
it's pretty fantastic
thank you guys
I did not
thank you for teeing that up
I appreciate it
of course
it's what a good co-host does
that's right
we set each other up
for success
right so Eli
what's poppin
Mr. Inbetween thank you on Disney Plus to co-host us. That's right. We set each other up for success. Right, so Eli, what's popping?
Mr. Inbetween,
thank you,
on Disney Plus.
Is it Disney Plus?
It is.
It's hidden away on Disney Plus.
Is it Star?
Because in the UK
we have elements
of Disney Plus
called Star
where they put
all the Fox stuff,
like Die Hard
you can watch on there.
Very cool.
Is that not the case
with Disney Plus out here?
I don't think you can get
Die Hard or anything like that.
If it's not on Disney Plus, it's not part of the thing.
I refuse to give Disney my money.
So do we, and that's why we spent 14 hours at Disneyland yesterday.
700 pounds.
My subscription to Disney Plus was actually gifted to me by someone who has moved to Vermont
and forgot to cancel it.
So I got that.
Great.
Just vocalise it right now in case he's listening.
No, he knows.
Yeah, he doesn't listen.
So Mr Inbetween is an Australian crime drama.
And the Mr Inbetween of the title is Ray,
who is a hitman who is estranged from his teenage daughter's mother.
Don't worry, you're looking at me, I don't care.
He's looking forward to when you have a teenage daughter you are estranged from.
And it is excellent, excellent writing.
There's a little bit of sort of black humour in it,
just a lovely balance in the writing between uh black comedy and some really
gnarly and well executed sort of uh action you know murder scenes and stuff brilliant stuff and
completely under the radar and it's also quite an inspiring sort of story about the guy this guy ray
the guy the actor's called ray and he did a little feature for No Money back in 2000, which had the same character,
this hitman character, Ray.
And then he struggled for years,
and then he's got three seasons of it now.
That's awesome.
Yeah.
Wow.
But really worth checking out
if you're into that sort of more noir-ish stuff.
I'm not, but cool if you are.
That's what's popping with me.
What's popping, mate?
I thought I'd extol the virtues of a YouTuber that we know called Stuart Millard.
And he has a channel on YouTube called Frantic Planet.
And what I love about it is he does video essays on TV hauntology, things from the past.
Mostly, like, British, like, entertainment shows.
So, people like, I don't know if you know Michael Barrymore.
No. Bobby Davro. What? Shows like Copycats copycats no so he talks about all these in detail no but the interesting thing is like
it's for me that there's the idea that nostalgia is great right the idea that nostalgia is a warm
comfort blanket against the horrors of the modern world and his channel goes to some length to say
no there's a lot of shit back there and here's how
it doesn't fly today like he talks quite um he talks about a show called copycats in a recent
video which was a show about impressionists all sitting in a row and this is from when 70s mid
80s it used to be a 70s show called who do you do and then it changed into a show called copycats
and it is certainly the most 80s thing you'll see in a while okay but also
do you know the thing that i hate about impressionists were because they're doing
the voice pretty well he's coming for you i'm coming for you where they their first sentence
is hello i'm mr t and then they go into the voice or hello i'm bruce forsyth yeah it's it when you
see it all lined up like that when he puts those clips together, you suddenly realise
just how terrible an art form impressionism
is. Yeah. Other than a tiny
handful of sketches, every
character is an impersonation
of someone else, and only
very occasionally did I not
recognise who they were meant to be,
which I presume is just a gap
in my pop culture expertise.
Two sorts of people really get up my nose.
That's Jehovah's Witnesses and double glazing salesmen.
I say very occasionally because almost all of them begin like this.
Hello, it's me Super Gran here.
Hi very much, my name's Richard Dodgers. Hi, I'm Martina. Hi, Lloyd Grossman here. this. Each impression is solely a way to tell unrelated jokes, to stop sketches from being just random
blokes talking. Got a weak one liner? Instantly double its comedic power by putting it in
the mouth of say, Seth off Emmerdale Farm.
How do? Hey I'm Seth Armstrong. off emmerdale farm how do hey i'm chef armstrong because it is like me it's like making memes
because these days you've got ai and movies and crossover and things or what have the simpsons
met family guy or yeah impressionist shows back in the day were exactly that what if basil faulty
met the guy who ran the cafe in french sitcom hello hello you know that kind of stuff it's just
i was gonna say have i ever done my impression for you no this is my uh my borat impression except without the accent or inflection
okay my wife it's as good as any other impression can you do an impression layton
no oh who's that it's a good one that's me you should have said during recording our podcast
yeah um so yeah so i just want to talk about him because i love his channel every time a new video comes out i get this unnecessary kind
of high but i'm like oh yeah i get to see it his latest one is about the children's royal variety
show performances where um for raising money for the nspcc which is the children's charity like the
nsp part of that yeah it's not that though it's the nspcc which is a children's charity. I like the NSP part of that. Yeah, it's not that, though. It's the NSPCC, which is the children's charity.
They do these kind of fundraisers
where Princess Margaret would sit there stony-faced
while all the talents of the 80s
would come on and do horrible sets.
And it's just cringe-inducing,
like Nookie Bear, a racist teddy bear,
or Keith Orville with...
Excuse me?
Yeah, no, there's...
He wasn't called Keith Orville.
No, no, he's not called Keith.
Orville was the duck. Keith was the puppet master. Yeah, and Orville the duck Excuse me? Yeah, no. He wasn't called Keith Orville. No, no, he's not called Keith. Orville was the duck.
Keith was the puppet master.
Yeah.
And Orville the duck, the green duck.
I don't know if you've ever heard of Orville.
Anyway.
I have not.
It was the unbearable duck.
He was little cutesy with massive cutesy eyes.
And he'd go, I wish I could fly up into the sky.
That's a term.
This is the hottest thing I've ever seen.
Mike, we need to dress you up in a green.
But I would do that without.
I mean, I'd just do it personally.
I am really hoping that this is an extended bit
where you have invented all of these.
Because we would believe it.
We would believe it.
That's what I kind of like about it
because we get so much American nostalgia our way
to British TV that sometimes when,
like when we were talking to Tim Heidecker
and he was like, some of the references in the
Alan Partridge book he doesn't get.
Well, it's true and it's past tense
now, but all these, when he was
saying all those references in the book, he doesn't understand
the names that Alan knows really
well within the BBC industry. So
I just think it's nice to kind of push it in the other direction
and say he's a great essayist
of bad 80s
TV and also random VHSs and it's great research and i just
i think it's important to save all this stuff and like you say um paul it was a dark time um yeah
in britain 70 especially that that particular era sort of from 75 to sort of 85. Yeah. Economic kind of collapse, right?
Economically, yes.
And also you have, in terms of sort of showbiz,
you have the real sort of death of the old formats,
such as variety and racist working men's club stand-up.
Yeah, yeah.
And then you have the emergence of alternative.
And it was a real thing at the time.
Because it's a real soup of you seeing
like the rick males are kind of clashing with the old old musical kind of guy the benny hills or the
michael barry moore's and there's this whole weird ugly mishmash live on stage in some of these shows
yeah and because just totally there's lots of whiplash between one act and the next so
i don't know it's it's funny stuff he's a very funny guy very well researched and i just wanted to say stewart millard if you want to watch him on
youtube i highly recommend it great the also also the thing that was going on sort of culturally
was there wasn't an um there wasn't a lot of media for younger teenagers um so they were
expected to be into sort of uh stuff that was slightly inappropriate for them.
And there was this sort of, we discussed this a lot,
the sort of pop stars were quite sexual sort of content,
but it was marketed to children, essentially.
So you'd literally have Paula Abdul come on,
do opposite the track, and then the Disney cast,
you know, those raggedy old things,
and they all sing Zippity-Doo-Dah on the stage
with a bunch of Boy Scouts singing behind them weird shit like that it was a strange time where
media hadn't wasn't as as controlled and wasn't as as democratized is that a word
yeah i mean yeah i think that's right but what you said wasn't there there is something and i
tell me if you guys feel this about a probably the type of older comedian that you're you're
talking about that like a benny hill type that is just immediately off-putting to me about that specific generation of specifically
British like old guy comics where they just feel creepy absolutely and there's so much on Stuart's
channel about that those people yeah wait wait probably way too much frankly sometimes it's kind
of well not that I recommend this but he does one
episode about a comedian called jim davidson who is a creator of garfield i wish because this guy
is a fucking horrible horrible prick so is garfield yeah not however not his owner john
john john john arbuckle let me talk a little bit about oh we're not talking about i'm personally
up for this all right the the lines of allegiance are changing i do like that i was just gonna say john is not a
bad guy he's just kind of a sad sack and i do think he was put in a rough situation by having
od dropped off at his place and then od's original owner named lyman just left right just left the
strip entirely where did normal what are you supposed to do it's normal all about normal i
believe is garfield's nephew question mark is that right i forget who normal's owner then why are you bringing
him up but he had a girlfriend oh who john john yeah liz and then she she left too yeah john sad
john is tragic i remember reading a garfield strip when i was uh john is tragic i do agree with that
uh when i was little back in the heyday offield, where he is talking to Liz and he's like trying to hit on her.
And he says, so Liz, is that short for Elizabeth?
And she says, no, it's short for Lizard.
But I didn't pick up that they were being ironic.
And I thought for a while that character's full name was actually Lizard.
Which would be great.
Yeah, I don't know why I haven't met anybody named Lizard.
That's like valid. Yeah, I don't know why I haven't met anybody named Lizard. That's like valid.
Yeah, I agree with that.
Anyway, sorry.
One thing on Garfield.
Yeah.
Matthew Lizard.
He hates Mondays, right?
He does hate Mondays.
There's no difference between the days for him.
He does fuck all every day.
This is a very good point.
Anyway, he hates Mondays.
Maybe he should just fuck off and join the Boomtown fucking rats then.
How about that?
John Davis.
And that's what's popping this week.
Right, what are we doing next?
So I believe you have a segment called,
was it Peaches and Lemons?
Yeah.
Correct.
We're negative,
so we've swapped the ratios.
Ooh.
Yeah, we have far more hate in us than love,
so we're going to do Lemons and a Peach.
I love that, actually.
Fantastic. Can I please have a look at the book please brian i'm unprepared i only wrote down
one peach and one lemon i know laden it's hard for you personally to find things to be unhappy
about but i i believe in you that's such a brutal dig brian jesus christ we're gonna have to ask you
to leave unfortunately now at this point yeah i don't know just shut off the fucking recording and brian wecht does not respect mental health or mental illness no that's
true making flipping jokes to his co-host i think they're flipping awesome jokes if you'd like to uh
if you'd like to uh get in touch and complain please email brian wecht at hate.com where did
you write down our lemons and peaches down eli could remember the
whole give me that fucking pen statement that you made can i can i tell a brief story yeah uh
the flipping reminded me my so uh listeners of our podcast will know i have a nine-year-old
daughter named audrey and the other day she came home and she was eating some snack and she went
that's flipping good and i was like flipping huh and she goes yeah that's flipping good. And I was like, flipping, huh?
And she goes, yeah, I don't like to say the bad word.
I know it's supposed to be frigging.
I thought it was very cute.
It could have been much worse than at the end, to be fair.
Oh, 100%.
I just like in her little brain.
If she said the C word.
Well, here in America.
She called you that.
Oh, I'd have to give her a high five
because she'd be dead on, honestly.
Yeah.
I'd be very perceptive.
Yeah, okay.
Beyond her years, yeah.
Well, I'll tell you what,
then let's hand out the peaches and lemons first.
So Leighton, go ahead.
What have you got for us?
Oh.
Which one do you want us to do first?
Oh, give us a peach.
You don't have to do three lemons.
Give us a peach and a lemon.
Okay.
My peach involves you. The other day... Well, first a peach and a lemon okay my peach involves you uh
the other day well first of all i get to meet both of you in person for the first time this is the
peach right of course it's the peach but more importantly if it makes you feel better this is
mostly a way for me to talk about we got to meet tim heidecker oh yeah we did thanks to you guys
yeah he was in this very room. In this very chair.
That's right.
Get his butt where your butt is.
Yeah, I know.
That's never getting washed, that chair.
No.
Just so you know.
Who washes chairs?
I mean, I have a private chair guy that comes in and does them usually.
You just lock him in here.
He gets an hour.
No questions asked.
Just, you know, takes care of it.
Yes.
Anyway, yeah, that's my one peach.
Okay, no good peach. Now we have to change our peaches. If we're a peach, you're the stone. questions asked just you know takes care of it yes anyway yeah that was that's my one peach okay
no good peach now we have to change our peaches if we're a peach you're the stone i just thought
i'm just soft flesh did you say soft flesh yes because because of the droop
damn that's stone fruit humor for y'all. The bruiser. And the Randy.
Oh, yeah.
Love bruiser and the Randy dog.
I really like that.
Yeah, me too.
Okay, so we have a jewel peach,
which is also a neologism that we've coined.
Oh, dear.
Tommy revolt.
Parklets.
Yes, we like parklets
What is a parklet?
Well Eli will explain what a parklet is
A parklet is what also is known as a pocket park
Or a small park
Loads of them in London
And I really am
A prick
Thinking of
Doing some kind of
I don't know what format it would be
Some kind of maybe a YouTube series or something.
The Parklets of London.
That's a great idea.
Also one of the poshest families, yeah.
Because they are delightful.
And we did find one,
we went on a pilgrimage out here the other day,
a really long walk up Sunset
to find the Winky billboard which we've
gone into many many times before we need not do it here but if you want to know what winky is
episode 181 and then the one we did last week or so which is an update of that but anyway whatever
and we did find the winky billboard but just before it there was a parklet
off sunset this is by the sunset strip right over there yeah yeah but right at the the posh end at
the top top yeah yeah um and it was a lovely little park but unfortunately like you find it
utterly dominated by the dog bit um which was full of ugly brown mulch or whatever that stuff is to
absorb the dog poo smells yeah yeah looks bad tastes worse i'm trying to think of where that
is like do you know
what they're talking about i do not no okay there's a little kind of historic house apparently
just behind it but uh it's sort of down from the road it's down the hill that could be most places
in los angeles it's not the one by the no i'm thinking not by the library that's a different
place but is it something that there is a lot of because i i was like you don't see a lot i think
small parts yes i i really think there are and you don't see a lot i think small parks yes
i i really think there are and you don't know about them unless you're kind of in the neighborhood
and the ones that are most rare are the ones like without play structures for kids every once in a
while you get like a teeny tiny one that doesn't have a play structure it's just a green area
without you know with a bench or a little those would be my favorite yeah those are the best ones
yeah yeah those do exist around but they're you know they're harder to find You know, with a bench or a little pond. Those would be my favorite. Yeah, those are the best ones. Without a double or a play structure, yeah.
Yeah, those do exist around, but they're, you know, they're harder to find.
Fair enough.
New York is really good for those. Angel's Flight is the first.
Does Angel's Flight count?
I wouldn't call that a park, no.
Does it have stairs on it?
It's a, I mean, it's a funicular.
It's the world's shortest railway.
Oh.
Yeah, it's downtown.
Oh, we should have done that.
It's very cool, but I wouldn't call that a park proper, right there's like well they shot uh what is it the scene from 500 days of summer
up there in the little park oh at the top yeah okay there's a park at the top of the finit that's
fair yeah but there's yeah okay i'd call that a park it's like a concrete park yeah because i mean
that rail it's useless like i don't think a park should have any concrete in it. It should be a mainly grass-based area for it to be a park.
That's just my opinion.
If you disagree, I can only apologize.
Anyway, our peaches, parklets, and listen up, urban planners.
More small parks.
You're on notice.
Should we move to the lemons?
Let's move on to the lemons.
I don't need a peach.
It's fine.
No, please.
Come on.
I'm sorry.
I'm going to get you out of my again. That's my peach. It't need a peach. It's fine. No, please. Come on. I'm sorry. I'm going to get your album out again.
That's my peach.
It looks like a peach.
I would never do that.
My peach is my upcoming smooth jazz album,
Tremendously Mature Situations,
which comes out on November 10th.
It's an independent record release,
so I would appreciate any support that people might care to give.
Can you make sure the second album is called Soft Flesh or something?
Soft Flesh.
Whatever you call the peach meat.
It's so genre appropriate.
That's what I like about it.
Peach meat actually is pretty great.
Also, Curd to Me.
Yeah, and the record could be like a peach pit.
Yeah, I like that a lot.
And make it like a nice peach color.
From a distance, it looks like a bum hole.
That's perfect.
Yeah. The track Butt Stuff, Taste like a bumhole. That's perfect. Yeah.
The track Butt Stuff.
Tasteful Butt Stuff.
Tasteful Butt Stuff.
I can only apologize for what I just did.
Come on, Paul.
But also...
I like that you said a word that has never been uttered
on our podcast before, bumhole.
Really?
I mean, we've said butthole, but not...
And Leighton, what is the preferred pronunciation of butthole?
Oh, bassole?
Correct.
You deletants.
Bassole.
I'm dropping one of these lemons.
Do it.
Yeah, do it.
Which one were you dropping?
Because things went better than he anticipated.
Yes.
I thought we were going to have nothing, but we do.
Let's not even mention the name of it because it's gone forever.
Point at it.
Yeah, let's drop that.
Okay, so our first one, our first lemon is Unnecessary Shouting.
Take it away, Paul.
Yeah, I don't like it when people shout at me for no reason.
It happens a lot.
That's it.
People shouted at me a lot at Disney yesterday,
and I don't know what I did wrong.
I really want to get into the story.
Should we save this for part two?
That's what I was thinking.
I think we should make it a cliffhanger for part two
because this is a great story.
I want to say great.
Traumatizing with a dash of depression.
Yeah.
I thought it was funny.
We'll go then to our one last remaining lemon.
Yeah, that's fine.
And that is Chummy Copy.
Oh, we fucking hate Chummy Copy.
Now, I don't know if this...
Who is he?
He's an old jazz artist from about 1976, I think.
I don't know if this is something that you guys have experienced out here.
I guarantee they will.
Yes.
In recent years, food packaging and other kinds of packaging for cosmetics and...
It's mostly food though, right?
It's leeching into other things. It has adopted a comedic and ingratiating and sort of...
Like overly familiar?
Familiar.
Chummy.
That's the word chummy.
Fucking chummy.
Chummy in Brit speak has a real connotation.
Isn't he chummy?
Yeah.
What a chummy man.
Here we call that chuggy.
Oh, chuggy.
No, we don't.
What is chummy man. Here we call that choogy. Oh, choogy. No, we don't. What is choogy?
Choogy is like dated hard to the 2010s, like early 2010s.
Yes, but I still want a definition of what it means.
What does it mean, though?
It's such a broad term, but like imagine...
Use it in context.
What's the most choogy thing in this room?
Me.
Oh, it's good, then.
I can't believe she's...
Here we go. so it means cool
okay i can't paul shut up yeah a woman is talking thank you yes okay um i can't believe she's
wearing uggs and leggings it's so fucking choogy but that that sounds pejorative the way you
say it it's always pejorative oh i thought it was it's not like man that's hella choogy, really cool. It's not? No.
So it means a bit basic.
Is it related?
Basic would be appropriate, I think.
Mid?
Mid's close.
I don't like old men using young people's terms.
Hey, don't be so mid.
Yeah.
No cap, bestie.
That's Boston.
Don't get choogy with me, mate.
Don't get choogy with me, mate.
What? I told you. you know what granddad feel
free to just dispatch choogy for whatever you want it to mean all right people will love it
it's a fun word to say i like saying it it's like a a train choogy choogy choogy choogy choogy
choogy and the blowfish yeah uh pod me boy is that the chaga chugi i love that that went off the rails pun intended
no but their um chami copy is a real problem uh in and there's uh you i know i've seen you've seen
they have it out here yeah uh oatly oat milk oh the number one chami copy felon i agree with this
uh you know it's obviously it's early in the morning, usually when you've got the milk carton on the on the on the breakfast bar or what have you.
And, you know, you're just trying to wake up and the fucking packaging is going on at you.
Oh, look.
And talking about people in their fucking office and what they've done and how crazy they are.
And it's like, fuck off.
I actually avoid products like that
chummy products there's also that whole advertising thing as well where it's like in sainsbury's they
had like recipes for certain things you could buy with stock you bought from sainsbury's so it's
like old pete's cuddly lasagna warm sunday kisses and you think fuck off can i tell you who the
number one offender for this in in country is? Trader fucking Joe's.
Yes.
Where if I see another salsa called like Trader Jose's Mui Bien Salsa or whatever, it's like, what are we doing?
It's like borderline racist and more than that, just not funny. funny i i will say as a woman who used cosmetics and skincare i think that is the worst version of
it because it does it incorporates a bunch of words that you guys just used of just like hey
there super superstar it's me your bestie and i'm here to help you look and feel your best yeah
like it's so demeaning right it's fucking lotion yeah yeah and it's funny you bring up the racism
thing because we've had an issue with this
uh brand of i know famously your podcast has had several incidents they are still in contention
until the law case goes through we can't speak about that there's a brand of cup noodle uh in
britain called kabuto and it is cunt they are they are they're guilty of charming copy but it's also
uh racist charming copy because it's also racist chummy copy.
You can almost hear the racist stereotype, the little Asian voice going on as you read it.
They have Asian, you know, their Asian flavors, Asian inspired flavors.
And they'll say things like, oh, find inner peace with the, you know, the samurai and like, oh, Buddha.
Yes, because samurai were famous for their instant cup noodle meals.
Right.
So down with chummy copy.
Down with chummy copy.
Down with chummy copy.
Down.
Stop it now.
Down with it.
And I believe down with lemons and peaches.
And that's that segment done, I think.
We didn't really get to do our lemons, did we?
Oh, do we?
Yeah, we did.
Didn't you?
Hey.
Oh, do it then.
Lemon.
When life gives you lemons. Give them Leighton's lemons all right i don't have three i have my one no one's
fine we're just bitter old farts no but i do want to utilize that at some point we should do a three
lemon one peach i think that's good for us yep just everyone's bizarro yeah yeah um my lemon
leeches and plemons it's a picture of leeches and a picture of jesse plemons oh
jesse plemons is great though uh my lemon today is that i'm just sick of charging things like i
feel like i'm always charging like phone switch laptop ipad whatever like airpods like this is
such a nothing problem it's just like with the thing that you want to use is not charged but
everything else is charged yeah but that's valid because it's like you're living under like in the
back of your head there's like a time bomb going off correct with your phone management it's constant
anxiety yeah you had that all yesterday with the phone when we were at disney i i flew too close
to the sun in terms of phone use earlier in the day. In the hot country, that usually means you've shat your pants.
Right.
I did that too.
I didn't like to bring it up.
But, you know, normally when I go to Disney, I'm there with a child and we leave relatively early.
I was looking at my phone.
I thought it was fine.
And then I forgot that I was there only with adults and we would be leaving late at night.
And I was like, you know, when I burned through 50% of my phone in three hours i was like uh-oh so but i much like the miracle on the temple uh the phone that i thought would last
for one hour lasted for eight so you've literally turned your phone problem into the story of
hanukkah that's right yeah no i think that i think that's fair uh and i was listening to midnight oil
at the same time so so it was appropriate.
But, sorry, Leighton, you were speaking,
and I don't like to interrupt you.
I think I was done.
Okay, great.
Can I say I absolutely agree,
and it's almost like, you know,
all of these apps, these social media things are sort of designed to give you this low-level anxiety,
FOMO, whatever, you know,
that you want to check and you keep getting notified.
And it's just basically the other side of that.
Your phone is, you know,
you have to feed it juice all the time you know so it's all this piping feeding i actually think it would be way more fun if charging was more of an involved process
you had a real like cronenberg type cable that you had to like squish into your phone it's like
made of flesh yeah i've seen existence you can buy online. There's a guy who's made a charging cable
that you put onto your phone to your computer USB
and it looks like a fleshy umbilical cord.
Oh my God.
And when you attach it to your phone or whatever,
it kind of pulses.
So it looks like it's drawing things in.
But, or you could put it a little bonnet
and a little milk bottle with a battery.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And then put the phone on your shoulder and burp it.
And lots of Twitter comes out on your shoulder
lots of Twitter comes out
sorry what
lots of what comes out?
Twitter comes out
I don't know what that is
no it's Twitter
no it's Twitter
I've been doing my annual
going into seasonal affective disorder
Breaking Bad rewatch
that's just kind of my transitional media but there's a scene I've been doing my annual going into seasonal affective disorder Breaking Bad rewatch.
That's just kind of my transitional media.
But there's a scene where they're in bed and they have their flip phones next to them on their nightstand not plugged in. And I miss having a flip phone where it's like, I'm going to charge this every three days or something and it's fine.
Those were the days.
My Nokia N20 would last for years.
Yeah.
I think it's still fully charged.
I think I could probably still
use it if i got out of a box right now yeah true yeah absolutely and what what is going to happen
with all of that you wonder you know to think and also you're right have you got 11 for us then
i do uh it's related to you guys uh so when i was setting up this gear earlier today i
was walking from that part of the garage to this part of the garage and i tripped over this thing
and i landed on my toe and i heard a crack and it's fine it's fine i've been monitoring it but
i i was just like i had this momentary thing where i was like that was not a good sound seems like
it's fine I take all I
take I took off my shoe to really get in there and inspect my foot which I like to do every so
often anyway and hot yeah so I was I was in there hands above the table I I untied my shoe and I
removed it and then I slowly took off my sock and I started really fingering my toe to really get in there and check that it was the big toe that I thought I heard the crack from.
And I started really getting it like massaging the sides of the toe with my fingers just slowly.
First, I use my thumb and forefinger and then I use my thumb and middle finger.
And I was like squeezing up and down the toe, really getting to the base of the toe.
When I got to the base of the toe, I kind of made my thumb and middle finger
into a little circle
and I started kind of twisting it
around the base of the toe
and then I ran that up and down the toe
very, very slowly.
And when I got to the middle of the toe,
I'd squeeze it a little bit
just to check to see if that middle knuckle,
that middle knuckle was where the pain was.
But then I got to the tip of the toe
and I really got,
I was checking now,
running my finger slowly over
slowly over the ridge
of the nail
slowly over the ridge
of the nail
and then back down
and I'm glad to report
that my toe feels
basically fine now
but I am limping a little bit
so that's my weapon
look at my sweaty hands
what have you done
he's drenched
his hands were
that's amazing
I know you can't see this
but in there it's drenched I've turned your table into a hyper global t-shirt
You sweaty palmed pervert
I was doing no such thing sir
The very idea to use a phrase of yours
So just to sum up
Hurting your toe is your lemon
And I've come next.
Well, if anybody's
still listening... Oh, they'll still be
listening. I think more people
tuned in just for that. They can't do it with the podcast, but
somehow more people tuned in while I was doing it.
Yeah, for the idea of
osmosis. They're driving somewhere.
Yeah.
Toe sex! Great!
Right, is that the segment done
are we all done
are we all spent
yes we're all done
in that case
you're spent
well more than I would care
I mean I'm gonna need
to have a change
so let's end this episode
so I can wash my pants
with a Brillo pad
and a hot tap
and we will say goodbye
for now
but before we do
why don't we let
Leighton and Brian
give them all the details
that they can
about their projects
and how you can find them online please begin later now huh uh all right so you should listen
to late night with brian wecht where the second part of this episode will be uh up at the same
time up on the same day yeah you can go to late night.com right you can go to still pay for that
that uh i think so that's actually a good question i believe you can definitely go to
patreon.com slash late night do the podcast there you can find the podcast wherever you
get podcasts or get podcast audio uh laden do you want to talk about homebody uh i co-wrote
a horror game uh with my friend jory who worked with me on dream daddy uh it's a bad guy bad guy
uh it's called homebody it's out now on steam switch xbox playstation and until november
third question mark uh it will be on sale for 50 off on steam yeah i'm getting the plane home so
maybe i'll get it oh you're sure i'm genuinely yeah because that fucking goose game's doing my
head in so uh thank you. And online Twitter or X.
Are we doing it?
Ah, fuck X.
Yeah.
You can find us at
Leighton Knight,
one word,
on Twitter
and Leighton underscore
on Twitter.
I'm sorry.
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about
the website Twitter.
I don't know.
You said something
that didn't sound familiar.
I'm talking about
the website Twitter,
the app Twitter.
I don't know.
It's a small social media app.
LinkedIn?
Blue Sky?
Blue Sky.
That's right. Threads. Yeah. Oh, Threads. My small social media app. LinkedIn? Blue Sky? Blue Sky. That's right.
Threads.
Yeah.
Oh, Threads.
My favorite social media platform.
Aren't we on TikTok now?
We are on TikTok.
You can find us at, I think,
Latent.
Oh, I love that he doesn't know.
On TikTok.
I really don't know.
I forgot.
And I like that I had to ask
if we had a TikTok.
Yes, we do have a TikTok.
Okay.
And you can find us
Latent underscore night
on Instagram
and also listen to
Mature Situations,
the smooth jazz album
coming out November 10th.
Look under Trey Magnifique, and that's with a hard G,
Magnifique.
It's not pronounced like the French.
Trey Magnifique, T-R-E-Y-M-A-G-N-I-F-I-Q-E.
And unfortunately, it is a very good album,
so I have to recommend it strongly.
Thank you very much.
Lovely stuff.
I hate to admit, but it's true.
With us, it is thecheapshow.co.uk.
It's your one-stop shop for
everything cheap show our links to the patreon are there live tickets for the cheerful earful
podcast that's happening in november actually that might be done by now scratch that thecheapshow.co.uk
for everything it's your one-stop shop everything is there go also go on i've got a show on soho
radio uh every two weeks the house of pickles sound show that's so great and it's a music show
with a little bit of chat and a lot of
film chat actually
funk soul boogie that kind of thing
disco and you can find it on the
Soho radio website
disco absolutely good
and that's all for now join us
next week on cheap show
where more I think next week's areap Show where more, I think, next week's
are Tim Heidecker episode.
However, part two of this delightful discussion
is happening right now.
Your ears are just waiting for them.
Go get it.
See you next week.
Bye, everyone.
Bye.
Bye. you