CheapShow - Ep 398: Don't Get Got (Mono Edition)

Episode Date: August 23, 2024

It’s a big old busy week at CheapShow HQ, as Paul and Eli are going to be spending most this week FILMING episode 400. However, this means that Paul doesn’t fancy doing a full proper editing job on the podcast, so demands a “real time” one hour episode. Uncut. Almost Uncut. Despite the tight time limit, the cheap chaps actually cram quite a lot into the episode. They’ll gobble down liquorice chocolate, slurp some odd Irn Bru soda, snack on some truffle chips and attempt to swallow a sour “Warhead’s flavoured” pickle. And that’s just the tip of the overstuffed iceberg. To make things even more “interesting”, Paul and Eli are playing a secret game in the background, but it’s threatening to detail the podcast before the show even gets started. Who will “Get Got”? Find out in this week’s breakneck episode! THIS is the MONO (Keep it simple) VERSION (Stereo version of this episode is available!) See pics/videos for this episode on our website: https://www.thecheapshow.co.uk/ep-398-don-t-get-got And if you like us, why not support us: www.patreon.com/cheapshow If you want to get involved, email us at [e-mail] And if you want to, follow us on Twitter/X @thecheapshowpod or @paulgannonshow & @elisnoid www.thecheapshow.co.uk Now on Threads: @cheapshowpod Like, Review, Share, Comment... LOVE US! MERCH Official CheapShow Merch Shop: www.redbubble.com/people/cheapshow/shop www.cheapmag.shop Thanks also to @vorratony for the wonderful, exclusive art: www.tinyurl.com/rbcheapshow Send Us Stuff: CheapShow PO BOX 1309 Harrow HA1 9QJ

Jesus. Sorry, I breathed in too deep. I breathed in too wrong deep. Right. What are you doing? Don't put the light on. Hello, welcome to Cheap Show. This is one of our patented real-time episodes. Not this bit. This is the cold open, but after the credit. What? When are you starting the clock? Start the clock. After the clock. Who are? I lost my bra. I left my knickers in my boyfriend's car. Who are? I lost my bra. I lost my knickers in my boyfriend's car. Oh, I lost my bra, I lost my knickers in my boyfriend's car. You got got. No, we can't because we haven't started the game yet. No, we haven't started the game yet.

You will not dictate that to me. Mate, wait. You got got. Mate. You got got. Wait, we haven't even explained what you got got is yet. It doesn't matter. You got got and I'm going to nail you.

Wait, okay, I'm not going to let you. That's fine Mate look look at the card pull look at the card Okay, I'm got big glasses on you turn the light off and I've got the glasses on. What does it say? Start to sing hum or whistle a song in front of a player. That's you. I'm the singer If that player sings hums or whistles it later on, you've got them. You've started to join in. Nailed it! Right, okay, can we... I'm going to put it back in my wallet. Hang on. Listen, there's a reason why Eli just shat his load, just yet, and it's because we're doing a game. This is a real-time episode, right, and after the credits end, it begins. This is the preamble to explain and we now have to explain what Eli just did.

So we're playing a game during this episode called Don't Get Got, right? It's a kind of party game where we get five directions or what do you want to call them? Objectives. There's six objective cards but one of them is shared. The guess what card. Yeah. So if either of us get to say, the other one to say, for instance, let's do it. Hey, Eli, guess what? What? Uh-oh, I made him say what. So then he asked, and then I said.

That's not real. That's not real. That's just a little bit of fun. So we share that one, but then we have five other things, objectives, that we try to get the other player to do. Without the other knowing that they're doing the objective that the other player wants them to do. So, which is why Eli Justen got his card out because he did one of the things that the card said he

wanted me to do. He got me got. I got got. You got got. Paul, what else is coming up on the show? I don't know. I don't know. We got nothing. We got this game. We got got got and that's all we got. Yeah. Well we got this game. We ain't got nothing apart from got got we got got. We're doing it in my hand Mike. We ain't got got. We only got got got. Look I have got a bag of goodies. I've got a bag of goodies. It's like a Gannon's Golden game actually isn't it? It is. I got got is a Gannon's Golden game. I got got is a Gannon's Golden game. It's a Paul's Pleasant Pastimes as well. I've got God is a Gallagher's Golden Game.

This bit's too loud. The levels are too loud. I might have to scrap this and start again, which means you can't get that point. That's not happening. Anyway, look, the reason why we're doing a real time episode this week is because this week Eli and I spend a few days in our secret Harrowed studio

filming episode 400 because this week Eli and I spent a few days in our secret Harrow studio filming episode 400 which is out on the 6th of September we are doing a video episode for 400 but as a result it means I'm gonna be doing a lot of that and I don't want to do a lot of editing so this is the real-time episode so I don't have to do too much editing. Start the clock! No we don't start the clock we start the credits. Start the clock! You can say start the clock when we get back from the credit music and the credit music is happening right now. It's the voice of shine. Welcome to Cheap Show.

Start the clock. Clock has been started and remember during this episode in the background we will be playing Don't Get Got because that's part of the game in it. Right so what we're going to do in this week's episode I'm going to look at my cards again. I'm just looking at my cards again this is a real time episode already. Okay right I've got a bag full of odds and ends. Put the light on. Why is the light not on? Because I don't like it. I'm going to open the wind.

He's going to open the blinds then. A little bit of sauce here. Oh, there's a sauce there. Dunny River hot sauce or something. Duns River. Duns River. It's better to get that or grace rather than Tropical Sun. Because apparently Tropical Sun is a big corporate behemoth

that is fucking lots of people over in that part of the world. You gonna do all three of these blinds then? I just wanna know how much light's coming in. Did that sound like a sandwich? No, I'm putting the light on. No! It's gonna be too dark in here. It won't, I'm gonna do all three of the blinds, yes!

Hurry up, it's too dark, I can't see shit. Turn that shit right off. Get some natural light in here, get some air in. You're a denizen of dank interior spaces, the blue light of screens flickering on your pallid brow. Open the fucking blinds mate, Jesus wept. So, it was quite good for you. Oh, oh, oh, I've got no energy. We've both got no energy and I'm not looking forward to the filming of 400 this week. Because my co-host... No, because it's stressful. Because I've been doing all the work, haven't I?

Have you had to organise a little film crew? Have you had to sort the cameras out, lighting and props and all that shit? I'm going to bring some props tomorrow props tomorrow so I have to do that good oh yeah you're Eli's in charge of fucking catering is what you're telling me every shoot needs catering is that a challenge you trying to get me to sing something? No. Alright. I just wanted to sing Every Loser Wins. Oh, there's a big penis hanging out that big window. A big elephant's penis. I think that's an what?

Er, an exhaust on a... Air conditioner. It's an air conditioning unit. Free standing air conditioning. Hey mate. Bosch, Bosch, Bosch, get me card out. Get the player to do the same thing three times. No I didn't.

One blind, two blind, three blinds. I knew that was a challenge! That's nailed it. I said it! You didn't. Oh no, I'm not having it. I'm not fucking having this. Nailed it. You didn't. You didn't. Nailed it. Nailed it. Nailed it mate. How about that? How about that mate? How about that? Now we're one all aren't we Mr Governor? Now we're one all. All my cards and me little wallet. We've got we keep our little quest cards in our little wallet plazzy wallet Don't we? Require you to put the card in some object and then get the other person to sort of uncover them

Yeah, but the point I'm trying to make is like they're in plastic wallets. So only we can see them Not we can't see each other's questions. Can we? Objective. That would be completely pointless then, wouldn't it, Paul? It wouldn't be a game then. I don't know what you're trying to say. What point are you trying to make? Very little meaning in content. Can I be honest? The problem is I'm trying to play this game so hard I can't focus on the actual podcast part of this show. You can't! I know! So stop! Stop trying to get me to do stuff, alright? Alright, well, alright. it's the first item what have

we got in here oh okay so I've got a lot of PO boxes at the moment trying to go through them and sometimes notes get lost and stuff like that but someone said two records and now I've got doubles of this one I thought would you like it which one do you think is the one I got doubles of the mr. men yeah are you trying to get me to do something? No. No. I'm just saying. Well, there was a triple thing with Fucking Blind wasn't there? Yeah, but I got that done. There was two albums sent to us. One is the Party Time with the Mr. Men 12 inch album and then Rowan Atkinson Live in Belfast. So he didn't do stand up as such. It was sort

of character sketch, one-man character sketch. Yeah that was pretty popular at the time wasn't it? I mean it's famous for you know that the headmaster sketch where he just sits there and literally the whole sketch is him reading names out. It's like Jenkins, it's that but he's a great performer. That's an interesting photograph on the back cover from the back of the stage and you can see that he's got these little spaces on stage where he's doing the costume changes and stuff. Almost like hospital blinds between beds almost

like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Is this recording right? Oh these are for me then are they? Yeah if you want them because I've got also Party Time with the Mr Men which, give it here, I haven't finished with it yet, is basically a stage play. So there was a touring stage play for a while where Mr Men would turn up at a school and then they would do a little mini musical and sometimes the kids can get involved so there's tracks like Here Come the Mr Men, Dr Trotters Travelling Zoo, hey mate there's a track here, Muck Spreadin'. What do you think the track Muck Spreading is all about? What do you think? Yeah it may be Tractors. There's Mr. Bump's Bump. There's Mr. Chatterbox's song. Brains, Little Miss Splendid. I wonder

what's going on there. And the Mr. Men hoedown and many many more tracks. It's quite nice this as it goes What's that Ben Elton? He's got something else out Yeah, some I think he's doing a stand-up tour or something. I saw on the side of a bus. Yeah That's good. Well, what? culture worry to say to speak no, he's Well, culture worry, to say the speak. No, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's... I'm camping. Can you help me?

No, because that sounds like a challenge to me. Fuck you! Turn it, turn it to failed. Turn it over to failed, mate. I'm never gonna get that, because you never helped. And I never asked you, because I know you're a mean man. Also because, mate, the way you did it, they were so fucking laboured. You went from being perfectly alright to suddenly going

oh my back, oh my back I had a cramp, alright fuck you man, hate this game I hate it it's giving me the DBGBs mate anyway, the game is still afoot eh, how about that, the game is still afoot read the card out

says sit on the floor for a while then get a play to help you up yeah you see that's a tough one yeah yeah anyway do you want to see what else is in my bag and do you want to see what else is in my bag do you though do this whole show this game fucked this show we can't do content when we're both wary of each other yeah you got got hey I got got baby

anyway the party time with Mr Men album I forgot who sent it but thank you very much it is a fun album this it's got that, you remember that sesame street live album we've got from the very early days it's kinda similar to that but Mr Men it's got nothing to do with the Arthur Lowe voiced thing but yeah. Yeah. Ah. Little songs and stuff.

Yeah and it's a lovely thing. I think it's quite a nice album if you're into that kind of childhood nostalgia. Yeah but yeah. Not going to be as good as my Rainbow album. You're looking at my cards. I'm just checking up on my cards. Aren't I see what I've got Anyway bollocks. Don't worry about it. Right next go Do you want to try these L origins?

organic plantain chips truffle flavor They are organic plantain chips truffle flavor plantain chips Truffle flavor Three times you bastard I'm sorry is your jumpy? I jumped on your car. I'm sorry, is your car okay? I'm fine. I'm okay. We don't trust each other now for the rest of this episode. I've realised it.

You should turn into the fucking... the thing! We should do a blood test to see which one of them mutates. No, let's crack on. Oh! Talking Mr Men. Oh, you've got Mr Noseybook. I love these early early ones where they were so rough and ready with the you can see the folks here you can see where they've painted him in

yeah that gives it a certain rustic sort you know what I mean yeah nice and they totally don't do that anymore do they it's just like a it's computerized or whatever isn't it anyway do you want to eat these crisps look at that mr. nose look at him yeah yeah it's his, because he was a nosey man. It's Mr. Nosey this one, by the way, everybody. Do I want to eat some crisps? Oh yeah, alright, yeah. Organic plantain chips. Hang on, let me just fix this. Hang on, bear with me.

Right, here we go. Shake me, it says. Shake it, then? Truffle flavour. Now, do you like the flavour of truffles, Paul? You know what? I can't think of what that flavor profile would be. There's those El Torres crisps that are now everywhere across London and they're the ones that did like a cheese flavor crisp and they did a fried egg flavor

they're Spanish they're like high end they like oh they go for as much as a fiver they do a truffle one. I've not had it. It's like they do an olive oil one, which is just a great sort of high, like a kettle, but it's better. Kettle chips have totally fallen off, don't you think, in recent years? I preferred the Sainsbury's in our taste test, didn't I? I remember them and they're very nice,

but is it just the brand kettle chip or the overall style, the hand-cooked style, as they say? Style is still valid. I just think kettle chips as a brand, qualities gone right down yeah do you think so I think so anyway open the you like to do kettle chips suck them you suck off the balsamic day it's not a suck it's more of a messel within the mouth a weird cradling of flavor upon the tongue. I wish I hadn't asked. Anyway, end of the point I promise you but those El Torre's crisps do a truffle flavor which is absolute mouth

crack. They're big packs and I'm like I'm gonna fucking finish this whole I'm like the fucking cookie monster I am with those. Right, can we now eat these ones then? These are the plantain chips. Organic plantain chips, truffle flavour. Yeah. It's a mushroom and it's got, it's like almost garlicky flavour. I don't, to my brain,

imagine what a truffle would be flavour-wise. It's not for me to say. I'm not getting a lot there. It just smells like a dried banana to me like plantain does oh yeah it does it smells just dry no don't I can't smell no flavor or nothing try this I'm just gonna have one I'm just one oh this one's all split like a banana oh oh it's a bit farty yeah that's that sort of a term umami yeah kind of meaty umami meaty mushroom it's very salty as well quite salty but that's no the umami flavor is accentuating

the salt. You see what I mean? Oh, they're really good. I don't like them. Oh, I like them a lot. They're a required taste, I think. Oh, they're lovely. Ow!

Is that a challenge? No. That challenge, he's itching himself. I think something bit me, is what it is. Oh, alright, what do you want me to do? Nothing. I'm just saying. Nothing? Nothing. I've just literally been

bitten or something and it's just like fuck right now right fine I need to find oh oh Eli what was that what did you say something just fell on the floor mate did you spot that did you oh let me get my card out. I nailed it. Get a player, tell a player to tell you that you've dropped something. Oh, nailed it. Ding ding ding ding ding ding ding. I'm two down. I'm two down.

Just as they got you to do it, didn't I Mr Silverman? Ding ding ding. Nailed it. Going in. If I was an awful, joy so that's two I'd say you didn't actually get me to do exactly that but in the in the spirit of fairness and good game good game so you've got three of you no two we're on two weeks oh so we got one each you're what oh yeah you fail once that means

you've got to get your next one right right? No, you're trying to do then well Come play with me ever dance with the devil in the play on moonlight No, wait there is food this one doesn't count this is um, what's I don't know what that is It's a noodle of some sort. I'm a It's a big bon Tian Shan Pamela it looks like a beef flavor beef and chili flavored noodle It's a Big Bon Tian Shan Pame. It looks like a beef and chilli flavoured noodle. Do you want it? Yeah.

There you go, that's that next item done. Wait, how many have I got now? So I've got two more to do. Okay, fine. Right, what else? Oh, there's another one. I think this is the same company but egg. Oh, perhaps that's the Big Bon Tian Shan Pame.

This is an egg and shiitake flavour it looks like shitty RC flavor no no no there's a bigger problem what's the bigger problem I thought we'd done half an hour and um it's been 13 minutes yeah I don't know what to do because we're also halfway through the game well we'd have to stop playing the game if one of us wins it I guess so yeah oh right anyway there is some fun stuff in here I got oh I can't remember who them. I think, you know that big huge box that I got that had like tons of stuff in and a price of shite and all that kind of... I think it's part of the same box. That is really lovely. Yeah, you like that?

Honestly, those... Plantain chips, I can give or take on them, but those are the best. The best combination. Yeah. It's really nice. Well done. Have another one. I don't want them. They're too... You know what? I think they're too salty for me. but those are the best, the best combination. Yeah. It was really nice. Well done. Have another one.

I don't want them, the two, you know what, I think it's just, they're too salty for me. And also I don't like that farty mushroom thing. Well, that's the truffle, yeah. If you don't like that, you don't like that. I don't, that's why I don't like them. You don't like it. Well, I'm glad you do.

It's a one and a half out of five for me. Okay. Oh, at least a 4.5 for me. There you go. Vastly different scores there, but that, them's the breaks. Um, next. I'm doing nothing. Other than owning you. Oh no, I, oh no, I did. Ah ha ha. No, you've just fallen for it. Read that out. Read that out. I have not! Read that out. What does it say? Put the card in the pocket with half of it sticking out. Get a player to comment on it.

What did you do? Fuck you, I hate this game. Ganon won this game. You know what this means though? What? We can at least stop playing the game and begin to trust each other and begin to do the podcast. Why? Yeah, because I got three out of five unless you want to go, unless you want to see if

I can get another one. No, fuck you. No? What others did you have? I'll tell you the other two I had. Fall over and get a player to help you up. You would never have done that. No, I don't think I could have pulled that off. You were good with the little manipulations. Yeah, and then the other one was get a player to draw something on your skin. Maybe I could have gotten you have done that. No, I don't think I could have pulled that off. You were good with the little manipulations. Yeah, and then the other one was,

get a player to draw something on your skin. Maybe I could have gotten you to do that. No, you could have done that. Can you pass me those, please? Ah, you bitch! I fucked you! Ha ha ha! Yeah!

Hide this card. It's a consolation. Hide this card underneath some food. Get a player to take the food and reveal the card. All right, but you know I've won already. Yeah, but still, got a little consolation there. I actually knew you were going to do that because I saw you put it under there earlier, but I thought I'll give you a little last little moment of joy.

You know what I mean? Ended on a high with that. Do you know what though? I actually really like this game. Yeah, no, it's fun. It is fun, but it's kind of anxiety causing, you know? A little bit. It's when you have to convince someone of something. It's like going on stage or causing, you know? A little bit. It's when you have to convince someone of something. That's like, it's like going on stage or something, you know? But it's the machinations of getting it all to work. I didn't think that one in my pocket would work

because that's why I was trying to do the mosquito bite to draw your attention to that pocket. I'm so stupid, I just sort of said, you know what I mean? Like, you know. It's because you're a very transparent and honest person. Isn't that what it is, Mr. Silverman? I have quite straightforward in certain circumstances. Yes, some would say Boring is a characteristic right?

At least we can go for the rest of this podcast now just for content Do you want to hear what my others were then? Yeah, go on Neither of us said the guess what one No, I thought that would have been a bit shit Convince a player see I would have liked to have tried this Go on Convince a player that something is voice activated when it isn't and get them to try it out.

Oh, that could have been fun. I don't know. It could have been fun. If you say something, there's nothing I really could have done though. You could have gotten one of your clocks from your bedroom and said, I bought this in a charity shop and blah. But you see, it's the machinations.

How'd you get to that position? I think it's a fun game to play in the background if you're doing something different, such as make a podcast in real time, Eli. Yeah, yeah. Point is, this game proves that I am the master manipulator. Yes, Paul. A devious cretin. You actually get a kick out of it as well. I really do, mate. You have no idea. At least you got crisps. I've got these, they're good.

Yeah, and you've got those two thingies. I bet they're out of date. Maybe. Check of the date. There you are. 84-02-14-12-20-20, oh, 2022. Yeah. Without date, man.

We haven't had them in storage that long. I've had them like a month or so. They're sort of edible, but it's not really worth it, you know. I learned the hard way making this podcast over the years. For years, up there on top of that record thing, there was just this bag of noodles, you know? I still got noodles. You know, the live show had to distribute them.

Actually, I'll have those to throw out at the live show, and then I have to warn people that they're out of date. Well, there you go. You could win those rejected noodles. So there's that right next. Oh man there's so many noodle places now. All right no thanks for that. Right what's in the bag? I've brought a bag full of goodies for the episode. Right we've got the records that's sorted so every again if you recognise something that we're looking at today and I don't mention your name directly, apologies,

but thank you very much for sending it to our PO Box, and you can get the information for our PO Box in the metadata for this episode, and on our website, main page, scroll down a bit. Right, oh, mate, no! Okay, you may have lost the game, but I think you'll enjoy what you've won as a consolation prize.

Let me read this out. I've got a letter for this. I definitely do. Right. So you remember, Kirsty Cooper got in touch a little while ago and said, here's a bunch of stuff. By the way, he like-

Pin badges, pin badges, pin badges. Calm down. No, it's better than that, mate. So I'll read it out. Cause when I read the letter, you'll go, ooh. Is it? What? I'll tell you what, you know- Cannabis extract.

No, because I wouldn't- That's better. No, because I wouldn't read that out without a fucking podcast. Oh, hello everyone. Thanks to all our fans who send us drugs in the post. Not that it happens, I'm just joking. Fucking oh, shh, backtrack. Right.

Bro! Just hold that. Because this is for you. I'm just going to get a glass of water. Oh Christ. Actually, can you get my- going to get a glass of water. Oh Christ. Actually, can you get my... Oh no, you've got it. Oh, that's the bottle.

That was nice of me, wasn't it? And thoughtful of me. Say again so you can get your passive aggressive nature on. That was nice of me, wasn't it? I brought the water in. No, thank you very much. I didn't notice because I wasn't paying attention. I was too wrapped up and trying to beat you at that game.

It really threw me off making this podcast. If you listen back to the first 15 minutes, you'll see I'm aimless because I don't know what's going on. You did well mate. Right here we go. Don't touch it yet. Don't open it yet. Just hold it. I'll read the letter. I'm holding it in my hand. I'm holding a parcel and it's covered in bubble wrap in my hand and it's oblong.

So she sent us stuff a while ago. Here's the followup letter. Hi Paul and Eli, hope you well. Here is the Tomy R handheld game that I told you I had one on eBay and it hadn't arrived in the post yet. It finally turned up after going all the way back to the seller. I have put a battery in it for you. It already has the cracks when I bought it.

So if there's any cracks in it, that's that. And also, oh, this is great. She put some Garfield tasty cat treats in for my cat Riley. So Riley's enjoyed those already. Yeah, so my cats love them. I hope Riley does too. And he did, he did enjoy them.

So thank you, Kirsty. Yeah. He's got his own special grass. What's going on with that? He ate that, then it went dry and I have to buy more. Isn't it, can't he water it or something? No. Oh, it's like herbs or something.

It goes. You should get him some more of that grass mate. Yeah, he enjoyed eating that grass. Saved him going out the house. So here he is, Eli's... He's like, eat some grass and do some Doritos and like, you know. I got him raw catnip and just sprinkled it on the floor

and he went fucking cockabonkers for it. Yeah, that's basically them just going, I'm coming! I'm in heat! Look at that. Look at that Eli. Now it has got a crack in there, you go. And a little bit missing in the, but the stickers are lovely and intact and I'm not going to be playing it much anyway. Do you know what, I just love the aesthetics of it, that yellow, yellow slab plastic almost Brutalist space futurey kind of thing.

A full-size one right there's the same time It's the same one. It's only this one model that they did Oh, that's that big one. Where is that big one that's in storage? I haven't you can get it when we go and film this week Yeah, should we put shall I put this onto the set for for the filming of 400 which we haven't done yet We're doing it tomorrow. We'll start all tomorrow. I'm to bring some of the screwball scrambled stuff and put it in the background as well. Okay, so let's bring this along. That's good visual. Thank you very much Kirstie. That's yours to keep. Well done. No guesswork on that. Now, oh now there were pins Eli, you're

right, so let's try and look for pins for Eli. Is that it? Yeah, you can have all of these pins because the ones that were for me, funnily enough, I already have. Let's see what we've got in here. But I can't remember who sent the pins now. I'm really sorry. Oh, it's got, just turn it to off position. Where are you, where are you meant to? You see, that little arrow.

Is it handheld? So you meant to do it like this? No, you meant to have it flat on a table. Flat on a table and that, and that little pushy, pushy upy things. Like a screw. It's fucking rock hard that one. Yeah. We've infamously called it on digitizer the dark souls of tomey games. Is it really? Yeah.

That's the hardest one. Yeah. That they ever did you think? That wow and yarr are both perfectly playable simply in a kind of kong man way. Yeah. That's actually a fucking pain in the arse. Yeah it's got little turntables and these little you activate the ball bearings by pushing them up sort of thing. To eat an obstacle on the course which involve

magnets and turntables and you've got to wend your way down to the beginning it it's very tricky involves timing and a lot of patience. I like this pin a lot. That was for me but I've got one of those it's a boo ghost from the super mario franchise. It certainly is nice nice size Nice enamel. I've also got a sentient fried chicken leg. Yeah And a yellow piece of macaroni. That's a nice pin. Yeah, so they're for you Eli two lovely three lovely pins chicken all about What no it's like that thing Japanese culture likes where they put cute little faces on everyone, like toilets and poos and rainbows and stones and logs and food. When it is weird is when that, this is a chicken leg, so this is part of an actual real creature at some point and now it's been turned into food and then that chicken leg, as if that's

a little creature, you know? It's very David Cronenberg Ian Kronenberg David no, who's it more like a nightmare. Yeah, you know like a nightmare where everything starts to it's like a Psychedelic bad trip. It's like that bit in young Sherlock Holmes where Watson trips out and all the cakes come to life and stuff I just felt really disturbing seeing that. I remember that. Do you remember that? Let's all remember that together. Oh what's the fucking noise? It's just unnecessary bike noise. Thank god, I'm checking the time. Mate. It's only 25 minutes past. We're going to do it for 35 minutes. I have no idea.

You can come in my room. I'll put them on my pin badge board. I'll come in your room. Let's go. Wait, we've got other things. Let's do that and end in your room. Because people say we haven't done this, but I thought we had. Tarkeys, Dragon Sweet Chili.

I have definitely tried these, but let's try them again quickly. Why not, right? We've got 35 minutes to kill. Dragon sweet chili. Now, what does that mean, dragon sweet chili, do you think? What springs to mind for me is that it's dragon fruit flavored, but dragon fruit, yeah, it's like a tropical fruit of an elk with sort of a mango, pineapple, that type of thing.

That kind of flavor, I think. But let's see what it says yeah doesn't say anything anyway so there we go Eli's gonna open the bag now give us a huff report see what he thinks mmm there's a sourness mmm and the corniness Oh I'm gonna taste one now myself. They're nice. They are nice. Very nice. They're sweet but then there's a proper kick that comes in they're less sour than other types of takis aren't they? Less of that really sharp, but still there's some sharpness, but it's really pleasing, the sweetness gives way to the chili heat, you know?

Yeah. Awesome. But would you agree there's like a meaty note there? There's almost like a kind of mint meat note. I think you're talking about like an umami mouthfeel, these sort of things. Yeah, oh, there's the heat come through. It comes through, doesn't it?

Yeah. Oh, they're so moorish. God, they're good. Oh man, they're lovely. Aren they're lovely. They are lovely. Like a fireside chat on a Christmas Eve. Like I've said before it looks like Tarky's themselves, the actual crisps, always pretty good. I mean in an extreme way. But anything that's flavoured with them I don't like.

Apart from that pickle the other day I did like that. I've got mixed feelings on that whole thing to be honest. Right do you know one more thing on these? He's making one last point beware here we go. This is like a Doritos chili heatwave but done right. Yeah yeah you know what I mean it's got the sweetness but and it hasn't got that artificial chili flavor it's got like a real kick sort of thing and it's got like a natural warmth to it a general Slow warmth that builds up and just resonates at the back of your tongue Is the next thing for you life out the bag? I can't it's a bit like a black bean bag episode actually I guess cool

I think this is a deck of cards noodle themed deck of cards. Yeah I don't know because someone decided to make that I know just to the eye. Why do you think it's noodle? Why are you looking at it and going? Oh, it's noodle themed. Why it's noodle themes I mean you'd have to go back and ask everyone involved with the make No, I'm not on about why you decided to make this noodle themed I want you to explain to the listener why to you this is noodle themed. I think a better way of putting it Paul, no, my way is fine. No, it would be what makes it noodle themed. And that's the question I'll answer if that's okay with you. What makes it noodle themed is, in fact it looks like some noodles.

It looks like it comes in a sort of a red and black noodle instant noodle wrapping. In fact, but it's actually one of those tear ones. So I'm going to have to ruin the packaging. So the packaging is similar to the packaging you'd see for an instant noodle in a Chinese supermarket. But it's got a pack of playing cards in. But the iconography of it is very reminiscent of Erla, Ban Yang, three times spicy, whatever it's called.

Is it Ban Yang? Yeah, the Sam Yang Bulldak range, the spicy ramen chicken which is everywhere. There's all different, you can just buy generic spicy chicken ramen sauce now, not even branded with them. You see it's become a whole sort of category. I need an update on what's happening with the Morley's chicken sauce, we need to get some of that shit. It took us a while to get the pickle ketchup of that shit. Alright, well, patience. It took us a while to get the pickle ketchup and that was an anti-climax. It was, but it did make everything taste like a McDonald's.

Yeah, which is nice. So you're going to open this now? But that's the thing about these. It's got one of those tear and resealable tops that noodles don't generally have, but food stuffs do, like bags of peanuts have that. You know when you... Gummies. But I'm going to have to destroy this toy toy I want to keep this packaging it's what

makes the thing you don't know what the cards look like it could be interesting well you see what I mean I don't have to do that much damage I guess there we go it's still there and I'm taking the cards out there's a spicy soup base sticker. Oh two sachet stickers Paul. That's nice. Spicy soup base sachet stickers. That's fun isn't it? That is very fun and I'll be sticking those on something. Oh do you want to keep it complete? Oh it's a decision he's going to have to make in private. I'm thinking maybe I'll take one of these box record 7 inch boxes to put on the set. Yeah. With the ones with stickers on yeah, you know yeah, that's something isn't it okay great Um have you got something? Oh these that's the thing

That's the thing with these while you're opening that I'm gonna look into the bag cuz there's something I want to read out cuz Oh a pardon for me coughing right is this the letter bear with me a real-time Episode means you see the cut and thrust of the stuff behind the scenes Oh, hey, here we go. So except the tackies treacle truffle The tackies and is attached as little gift poor limited edition pin badge from Tom Shepard's Oh, that's the one from ages ago. The oldest trick magic shop in the world in Scotland Do that little badge I've got with a little rabbit coming out the the hat? Oh wow these have been, I've had that for a while then. I'm surprised those crisps are still in

date. They were on holiday in Spain and saw those takis and got them. Anyway thank you Tregal Truffle. I think you can get those here but those. Yeah no at the time. I don't know if we've tried them before perhaps we tried them as part of a big tasting session and we didn't really linger on it but those are bloody good. Maybe we didn't give them their due diligence. Here we go here's the thing I was going to read out here we go so while you're getting into that. on it but those are bloody good. Maybe we didn't give them their due diligence. Here we go here's the thing I was gonna read out here we go so while you're getting into that. Hello Eli and Paul this is Mika from Finland have you probably gathered from the envelope oh because the letter was on it. Sorry for the

shit handwriting never apologize for that it's fine I only write by hand maybe 14 times a year that's a face oh four times a year that's still very specific knowledge I wanted to send y'all some stickers of my 3d art Filthy to decorate with them like the insides of your bin line feel for not filthy feel free Feel free. Yes kind of hard thing to say isn't it? It also is filthy feel one. Nah feel free feel free Filthy feel free that made me think imagine you had three they should do a remake of a Noah sequel to total recall instead of a lady with three boobs what if it was a man with three dicks just like on a stool thank

you that was good anyway I'm Being a fan of yours since Barshens looking forward to more noodles and sauce reports So thank you very much indeed and wait, here's the stickers This one and that oh hang on Wait there don't talk until the microphone's here, here we go. That is like a monster's eye, one of these stickers, and the other is like a horrific ice cream cone, which has eyes in it with the hundreds and thousands sprinkles. Stick it on one of those boxes when you bring it. I'll give you the other stickers and you can stick them on it. So thank you very much. I only want one in...

I'll have them. I'll have them, yeah. Right, now we're back to Eli's cards where we will now look at the cards. They're the cold versions of the sashay stickers. Like jokers. They're not the jokers, no, because the jokers are separate, but they're just extra card sort of things. Nice. Pictures of all this stuff will be on our website thecheapshow.co.uk should you fancy it. The joker is a person in sort of those traditional blocky clogs that they wear in Japan. Yeah. Running along with a fire extinguisher in one hand and a bowl of literally, literally flaming noodles. Well you assume they're noodles. Yeah. Weird that they are

weird. So do you see that? Yeah. It's got flaming bowl of noodles on that joker. On that joker still got the flaming bowl of noodles but there's a rolled up four of hearts inside the bowl. Bizarre. That is interesting. Maybe that's to do with a particular game they play. I don't know. You know where the four is wild or you know what I mean? It's very... What are the kings and queens and all that shit? They've gone with the spicy theme more than the sort of noodle theme. There the Jack of Spades is glugging on a bottle of water. Oh yeah.

The Queen is sort of mopping her brow and she looks crazed. The King of Spades... He's got a bowl of flaming noodles. Let's see. Oh no, and they're all different, all the picture cards. The Jack of Diamonds has a bowl of noodles in one hand and he's using chopsticks with the other hand and grasped within the chopsticks is a big chili.

It's a chili pepper. The Queen, she's just slurping up some noodles. So this royal family can take their chillies whereas the other one couldn't. The King, no the King's looking like he's breathing fire onto a bowl of noodles and the King of Clubs there, what's he doing? He's just got a plate of chillies, full stop. The Queen of Clubs, she again slurping some noodles in a slightly different pose. The Jack there, what's he doing? He's got a bottle of sriracha, you can tell from the green cap and he's squirting it onto a flaming bowl of noodles, Paul.

It's very exciting stuff, very exciting. We haven't done them all. Haven't we? Thought we had. We have. Fucking hell, good. So there you go, a pack of spicy cards. They are spicy cards, thank you very much. That will go into my card collection. Would you play it, would you use them

as a pack during a game? No, because he has no joy. Right. Right, hang on. What, let me just regard the time, because my start, I forgot to start my start watch. You forgot not a runer, dear. Right, hang on. Let me just regard the time because I forgot to start my stopwatch. You forgot to start it? Yeah. But don't worry because the timer's fine, yeah.

What do you mean the timer's fine? On the recording. I know I'll look at how much we've recorded. How long have we been doing? 36 minutes. We've got 25 more to go, mate. Do you want to play that game again from the start? No. No, alright then.

Well, we'll have these drinks and then we'll go into your room. I've got drinks, have you? Yeah. I don't know if we've done these before. We'll need to clear up because... Iron Brew Extra... Wait. Raspberry Ripple!

And... Wild Berry Slush. So we've got Iron Brew Wild Berry Slush and we have a Iron Brew Extra Raspberry Ripple. I don't know if we've done the raspberry, if we've done the crush, but I think we did. We haven't done either of those. What was the other one we did though? Because we did two flavoured Iron Brews a few weeks, months ago. They do all sorts of different flavoured, but they were sugar free. Those look to be actual sugar versions. No, we did like birthday cake. It was something stupid like that.

It was a cream soda flavored iron brew, wasn't it? Right, yeah. You remember? They weren't those ones. They were not those ones. I'm sure. That's fine. I just wanted to make sure we weren't repeating ourselves

because we have burnt through quite a lot of content in 35 minutes, which is a record for us. And we've played the game. It's been quite stellar. Oh, and guess what? What? Aha, got got you the game is still playing the game is still playing and I won that I won that one I'm gonna go for a walk around the couch it's all I can manage I'm walking around a table

of love what you want to do now you Should we just have these drinks? Yeah. Right. Drink your water and I'll pour it in and I'll now take it from the can. What do you want to start with? Raspberry ripple or do you want to have a wild berry slush? These are Iron Brew Extra. Yeah. And I think those sugar free ones,

they were different shaped cans to these, weren't they? They were taller, they were more like a sort of Red Bull can. No, they were same size. Were they?? Yeah because I've got one in the fridge still from last time. They were all completely sugar-free, zero. They were zero and they were terrible weren't they? Yeah. No that does say no sugar. Yeah extra taste no sugar. So it's like saying Pepsi Max extra max. It's the same same difference. These are going to be poor. Did we like the other ones, the cream soda one? I can't remember how we felt on that. I think it was largely belligerence. It was largely horrible.

They're really a spartamimimi. Well, here we go. Which one do you want to start with? With those last ones, it was a spartamania. It was a spartamania, Paul. Maybe we'll just stop the episode now. No, we can't. We can't stop now. We can do that, can't we? We can. Maybe we'll just stop the episode now. No, we can't. We can't stop now.

We can do that, can't we? We can do anything we want. It's our show. You keep looming over me. This is weird. It's because you're sitting down. I'm going to loom if you're sitting down, aren't I? I'm standing up because that's how I roll. I'm a very magnanimous and energetic person. And I wish to strut...

Magnanimous? You're generous? Yeah. You're Yeah, you're not you're not that generous. You're not When was the last time you got me a birthday present or a Christmas present I got you on this year You got me one this year You mean last year? No, you didn't Couple of weeks 14th of September. Yeah. Wow. We'll see how magnanimous I am then, won't we? I just remember getting you uh like the Tommy Wow and I remember getting you the pinball and I remember getting you the Rubik's Maze thing and the Rubik's all the stuff all the little fuzzy things I've got that you've on literally on the recordings I've gone oh Paul what a wonderful

thing thank you very much and then you say I got you something for Christmas and it's a box of tea a small box of tea no you don't like tea it's not my fault I do like tea I just don't like tea as a Christmas present it's like socks or a beanie hat yeah you like socks I don't get me a pin badge from a birthday. There you go There's a challenge get me a pin badge from a birthday that you think I like All right. Yeah. Yeah. All right, and if you don't get one, I'm gonna cancel the podcast There you go. Everyone's listening if Eli doesn't get me a pin badge and I like the pin badge. That's the other caveat Then cheap show is over and next week after that will be an episode called Paul Gannon's cheap show

Starring Paul Gannon and a rotating world of guests. You can fill in it's gonna be It's gonna be huge. I'll have all my friend turn up and Weekly or maybe on my own if I have to either way the whole jet future of cheap show is based on Eli's success Come on, let's open this raspberry ripple. All right, you open it. I'm holding the microphone These flavors would definitely weren't these flavors I was just not sure if they were these flavors So that artificial castorium flavour. Right. Castorium was the gland, beaver gland.

Yeah. That they used to make raspberry flavour. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But smell it. I'm gonna smell it. I'm gonna smell it. Get off. Okay, he's gonna pour some out.

Right, he's pouring it out. It's still orange. It's very much the colour of iron brew. Right, I'm gonna have a snuff. Yeah, it smells like iron brew with a slight whiff of raspberry over the top of it. That's alright. It's very sweet, isn't it? It's very sweet, but also it's kind of bubbly in a way that kind of foams up in the mouth.

That's not too bad. That doesn't have that really extreme aspartame. It is there. It's definitely there. But the raspberry, Ion Brew flavour just masks it a little bit more. It does do that doesn't it? And I think that's a similar effect to Pepsi Max cherry it masks the aspartame the flavor profile they've worked out a way of softening the edge of the aspartame. Aggressively disagree. Right next one is the wild berry slush. In it goes, gonna open it. And I'm gonna give it a huff. You know that generic mixed berry smell? It's that generic Nick Berry smell.

Nick Berry. Nick every soda loser. Oh it's a bit... Yeah, it's a bit black currency. Yeah, it's mixed berry isn't it? It's just that Nick Berry flavour. Every soda wins. He's having a little sup.

I am gonna have a sup myself. Here's the sup time. Let's have a report there. Ugh, tastes like medicine from Nana. Tastes like, you know, that kind of dissolvable medicine you get for like tummy aches or stuff. Or. Yeah, it's got a bit of a medicinal,

not as successful at all as the raspberry ripple, is it? It's much more of the aspartame coming through the sort of emptiness. Still, it's got a nice kind of chalky, dark berry aftertaste, which is okay, but upfront is not much there other than the fake sugar. They're not great, they're not great, but I do... I don't remember enjoying them this much the other flavors I tasted. No. These are, these are, as sugar-free things, yeah, sodas go. These aren't bad, are they really? No. It's crazy how sweet they are. It's actually sweeter than sugar, isn't it? It feels like that. Is it that artificial sweetness? Yeah, it feels like that, doesn't it? So, you know, alright, but I'm never going to willingly want to buy them on a hot sunny day, you know

I'd buy Pepsi max cherry shut your fucking mouth you animal Cut that out Ganon future Ganon your prick. Yeah. No, I can't I've just said it's real time. Hey I'm gonna cut I'm no no unless you say something like I don't know horrible I don't usually no I know do I no oh Just thought something racist to say didger go on what you're gonna say I wasn't gonna say anything You went ooh, which would suggest to me in a verbal agreement situation that you had something of excitement to add No, just said ooh. I just move. Ooh. No, just said ooh. I just went ooh.

No, yeah, just can't, something, I just thought ooh, ooh. That's what I thought. I think it's your id reacting to the need for attention before having anything to back that up. I think it's your body going, I need attention now. Oh yes, Eli, what? I don't know. I don't need attention. I get attention, I don't need it. Yeah. People.

Like? The police? No. No, I get attention. Listen. People in alleyways who don't want you pissing anywhere near them? No, listen. You know, some have it, some don't. Drug dogs. Drug dogs. Yeah, you don't want that kind of attention. You really don't. You don't at all. Anyway. It happened to me once, you know, I got drug dogged at Totten Court Road Station. Oh, of all places. I only had a very small amount of cannabis, herbal cannabis on me. And I looked across, because they do it in a mass mass they try and get loads of people when they do that I shouldn't I don't think they should do that personally you know it's a bit oppressive isn't it anyway they should legalize drugs I think decriminalize the list. But I looked across and someone had been caught as well some other person and they would literally

lifted a full set of scales out of his backpack. We see it right in the Tube Station floor and it's sack basically of marijuana. I had a very similar thing happen to me at Angel Station when we used to do the laughing cavaliers. I had again a little bit on me come out of Angel Station and dogs and I got pulled over taken into a little office and there was like good cop bad cop going on where one person was just like it's all right you know your little bit we'll just take your details and as long as you keep your nose clean for a couple of months you know it'll all be forgotten about don't worry meanwhile the woman was staring at me giving me eels and asking really weird questions like what's that and I had like a ukulele

and I said oh it's a ukulele she goes well play us a song then and I was like no it's all wrapped up and I haven't tuned it yet and then she goes well where are you going with it And I had like a ukulele and I said, Oh, it's a ukulele. She goes, well, play us a song then. And I was like, no, it's all wrapped up and I haven't tuned it yet. And then she goes, well, where are you going with it? And I was like, oh, I'm doing a thing at the pub. I'm doing a comedy. And she went, oh, what kind of comedy? And this is after I've given my name and details and everything and all this, all the usual stuff. And I went improv. Oh, what's improv?

I'm just very good at making things up on the spot. And she went, like your name and address. And I was like, no, I just meant in general. And as I'm beginning to like panic a little bit, this guy comes in with a big waistcoat, a big like matrix coat on, opens it up and every pocket's got a massive jar of pills and powders.

And yeah, it was like Mary Poppins carpet bag. It was just like jar, bags, jars. And he was like being very quiet just going I'm just gonna get my lawyer just gonna get my lawyer of course yeah Wow anyway I had to keep my nose clean for nine months and then you that police forget all about it yes they do yeah and then you're not on a record anywhere lingering anyway here's the next bit hang on we've got left we're in the last 15 minutes Eli it. It's all happening.

Dearest Paul and Eli, I stumbled across this very interesting item while browsing a trendy Asian snack shop here in Croydon. Ooh, I love Croydon, mate. Yeah, you're not going to like this, though. Oh, God. Just before I read it, I'll just let you pull it out of the bag. And then I'll read. Oh, God. What is it? Oh god I don't think we've done these every. We don't have no not never. I'll just explain

it it's a pickle branded with a popular sour candy seems right up Eli's street and could be a fun taste test. I know this is a very Eli centric out item and I apologize profusely to Paul as a way of apology Please accept this little gift for each of you. I did my best to render your likeness with parts. I could find online Oh, yeah, what's this? Where's that gone? mate we They made they made us whip They may they may just whip

Whip and go and go on that you keep keep talking about say what that is. Oh, no, I need to hold them But I've got the headphones on and gone just Okay In on my hand ladies and gentlemen Just take all right. I have Van Holtens I have Van Holtens sour dill pickle Warheads extreme sour so Warheads is a big brand of sour based confectionery we did and they do are reaching out aren't they because we tried their sodas and they were quite nice actually yeah you remember the

sodas are there in there as well and I've seen these about but this is like an individual gherkin cucumber in a sort of a Capri Sun upright sachet thing and we've had these before similar things that weren't warhead branded do you remember and there was like mama pickle Daddy Pickle and all of those big sis or whatever. And they were pretty rough. They are on the much more chemically end. These sort of truck stop individual pickles. And for value for money, talk about cheap show, Paul.

These aren't very good value for money at all. They're usually like £4 or something. For one pickle? Anyway. Anyway. Before you open it, let's... It's all they used that four pounds or something for one pickle anyway Anyway About this pickle it might be delicious. I'm gonna I'm gonna wait Before you crack it open because we do need to test it on the podcast I want to show you the other thing they said that they made no we got ten minutes. We're alright, so

So they made they they they made this online I believe. I did my best to render your likenesses with parts I could find. Thank you for everything you do. If I ever need something to listen to on a busy commute, this will always make me smile and giggle to myself like a lunatic. They won't be able to make Cheap Show live in October, but wish us the best of luck.

Thank you, Callum. Thank you. Callum for that. Here's what it is. Oh, is it a little... What's going on here? Oh, a little Lego me. Oh, that's excellent. Yeah, and there's a little Lego me and I come with a little ghost book.

Oh, a little Lego me. What do you come with? I don't know if I've got a prop, but I've got like... I reckon they just got the Lego Hagrid, didn't they? And then put it on a body. Oh, shut up! Was that meant to be a dig? It was, wasn't it? No, but that's what they used.

No, they... No, they've got a bearded guy, like a pirate head, and then a big... I like the wig. What do they call that? The helmet? Do they call it the helmet? Maybe they call it the helmet. The hair piece is very long, like a rocker.

Very similar to my hair. And I've got a sort of big belly coming out there. It's very accurate, but no prop. Oh, hang on, maybe there is one. It's a record, I've got a record. Yeah, a little vinyl record. It's a little me, Paul. There's a little me with a little...

I've got blonde hair in this, which I don't particularly agree with. I might swap that out for something a little bit darker. But I've got a little me. I've got to taste that pickle before you run out of time, bro. Yeah, I'm wearing a Hawaiian... Shut up! I've got a little Hawaiian shirt on with a shirt underneath. Look at that, look at him.

Is that Hawaiian? It's a colourful shirt. The hair pieces are excellent, aren't they? Yeah, so there we go. Thank you very much. Can they're gonna We're gonna show for me Lego I'll put him in my Lego Ghostbusters firehouse and I can live my dream with my Ghostbusters friends in the firehouse Oh, thank you. Kellen for making my dreams come true He spilled a little bit of water on himself the little baby needs to calm down

There's another ice cream van. Beep bop. Police with weird... Contains police dogs in. There were dogs in there? Yeah. Driving it? Yeah, driving it.

Mate, let's end on the warheads. Come on. Right. What are you doing? I'm trying to make sure I don't lose anything of that. Okay. Right. So, just to bring you up to speed, it to make sure I don't lose anything of that. Okay. Right, so just to bring you up to speed, it's a real time episode.

It's nearly done. I won the Don't Get Got game. And we've been tasting and looking at a few things from random PO boxes over the course of the last few months. Right, wait, don't you dare talk without the microphone near you. Oh, it smells like gherkin-flavoured scratch and sniff stickers. Oh, God!

It smells like isomalt poured, like, as I say, sour powder all over like a McDonald's burger. Oh, it's making me salivate. Oh, I love that. Are you gonna try this? No. Why not? I don't. I don't want to. Is that alright? I'm not

a pickle man. You're the pickle expert. You're a pickle expert. I let the expert speak for he knows of what he talked about. Oh he's having a bite and it's not looking good. In fact he's squinting quite considerably. How's it going? It's not great. Sounds squeaky, because I can hear the squeaking of your teeth upon the chili pickle thing. The texture's not great, you know?

Is it rubbery? It's kind of soft, no. Not too bad, actually. The way you fucking take left turns, like a wild mouse ride. Yes, like a wild mouse ride. like a wild mouse ride oh no tart so tart though thanks for listening everyone we've got seven minutes we've got seven minutes what we're gonna do I'm done Paul I've got to go tidy up do

you want oh I love that chocolate bar There's something There's a whole stuff let's do that This is a... I think this might have been from... You sent this? This might, might be a event I might be wrong but these are Dralmer Chocolate Bar Fregulacris I don't know

I think they're licorice And there's a Tromp Bar by Noah Tromp I'm trying the um Dromur Dromur Trump bar by Noah Trump. I'm trying the Drummer Yeah, oh Everything's licorice. Maybe that's what's thrown here is oh

No Don't is it a kind of rubbery chocolate licorice or is it the basically a chocolate bar with a whole? like a and Leather, you know, yeah. Yeah, not for me one or the other. I don't like to mix it. What about this curly? Really? No, is this licorice as well Oh, let's not end on licorice but they're licorice as well these weird gummies These are Sir Scala Gelatafliny Bubs. Bubs. These are, they look like they're fruit things. These look like hard-boiled fruit things.

There's a fresh smell coming off them. I'm gonna try one. Like a laundry smell. These are gummies. Yeah they're nice. They're nice. They're not like multicoloured fruit gummies. Oh look. Two flavours and there's a skull. Oh actually they're quite nice. They're quite pleasant. Very nice. What about Tr what about Tromp? Erm, it looks like a chocolate, licorice and fondant bar. Like a mint fondant? Could be a, could be an erm, like an almond fondant or a mint fondant. I'll taste this.

Yeah. You know what mate, no, I'll taste this one for you. Thank you. You watch me. You taste it, mate me do it it oh tell me what kind of fondant I think it's probably right no I think it's a marzipan II thing what's that oh it's like coconut that smells of coconut to me desiccate like a bounty that smells to me. I don't know about this here we go. Maybe to uh what's going on there flavor-wise? The licorice and the fondant and the chocolate it's like a chocolate wrapped licorice all sort. Yeah that's what that other one's like very

similar. I just think it's you're just not used to it Paul that's all it you're just not used to it, Paul. That's all it is. You're just not used to it, mate. I think all it is, it's just not a tradition to mix chocolate with licorice in this culture that we grew up in. Is it like a kind of Norwegian or Scandinavian thing? These are, where are these from? Holland. I don't, we don't know where they're.

Don't know, there's no letter. No, no, no, no letter. You know what's nice well having like a sweetie then a bit of a warheads pickle one thing I'll say about this warheads pickle to me just tastes like a very sour there's no sort of warheads sweet flavor it's just a very sour dill pickle basically just extra sour which I guess is what they're going for but warheads you'd think like there's some fruit flavor or some sweetie flavor there's nothing there's no fruit signifier just here is a sour pickle yeah yeah well

that's we're nearly wrapping up now I think we've got like two and a half minutes left of this real-time episode. Do the housework then Paul thanks for listening everyone listen yeah thank you for supporting us on Patreon, if indeed you do. It's patreon.com forward slash Cheap Show, as we say, give what you can, but only if you can. And if you can't, help spread the word. Reviewing us on an app platform or... Oh!

Don't stop eating the pickle. I'm going back in, Grant. Or reviewing or social media, Facebook, all those kinds of things. Oh, that hurts so good. It helps us considerably as an independent podcast. What else? Yeah, go to our website, thecheapshow.co.uk for images to go along with this episode,

which is your one stop shop for all things Cheap Show, really. And we got Cheap Shot still coming out fortnightly on YouTube, special 15 to 20 minute extra bites of Cheap show every month and also tomorrow in cheap show time we start filming episode 400. It hurts me. I keep going back. I can't stop. It hurts me.

Take it from me. You have to have some. I don't want any. You have some pickles. I don't want some pickles. Have some Warheads pickle. Stop being a push a pickle pusher. Don't be a pickle pusher.

Oh stop it. You're not selling it by doing that either way howling like Frankenstein's monster yeah looking like him as well smelling like him didn't stunk of death from aldehyde from Aldehyde. Right what we got left? We got a minute and a half left. It's exciting. Ooby-doo, ooby-dooby-doo-doo, ooby-doo, ooby-dooby-doo-doo, ooby-nip-nip, ooby-doo, bit-nip-nip, pull hard. Right so basically 400 will be a video episode on YouTube and YouTube only. We'll be doing a live premiere with it on Friday, six of September, UK, 8 p.m. time. What?

That's been a minute and a half. No, it hasn't, I'm looking at it now, hang on. 45 seconds. Well, get this, wrap this up. Let's wrap this up. So yeah, you can join us. I'll be there in the chat live. Eli might be, I don't know,

depending if you're DJing that night. Thanks for my arse, guys. Are you DJing 6th of September, Friday night? Am I? I don't know, are you? Yes. Right, well then he might not join us for the live chat then, but I'll be there for the live chat.

I could join you from where I'm DJing. No, I guess you could actually. It's only just a chat room on a phone, isn't it? Yeah, please, let's do that. That'd be fun, wouldn't it? That'd be fun, wouldn't it? It would be. So we'll be in the chat room on a phone, isn't it? Yeah, please, let's do that. That'd be fun, wouldn't it? That'd be fun, wouldn't it? It would be. So we'll be in the chat room for a live premiere of episode 400, 6th of September, 8pm UK

time. Right, and that's it. Just checking the time. Seven seconds. Say goodbye, Eli. Bye. Bye. Thanks, everyone.

Bye. Thanks, everyone. Thanks for tolerating this real time episode. Thank you, goodbye, good night, goodbye. Stop it! I'm gonna go in Eli's room and have a wank. Stop it! I'm gonna do it. I'm in.

You couldn't go through the door, you did weakly. I'm just gonna wank in your kitchen then. Oh, fucking, press stop, it's well over him. No one, that's not funny, Paul. It's coming out all thick, it's well over and... No one's... that's not funny, Paul. It's coming out all thick. Shut up. Just turn the tap off. Right, Mr. Men to visit you. Here come the Mr. Men, and the Little Misses too.

Oh boy, ready for fun and games, anywhere. Oh boy, so many fun and games, anywhere Oh boy, so many different games, it's easy to stare and forget which one is which All the Mr. Men Mr. Men, how do you do? Oh boy Ready for fun and games Anywhere

Oh boy So many different names It's easy to stare And forget which one is which Oh, the Mr. Men, always up to mischief Always up to something new It's a new year, come the Mr. Men Mr. Men, how do you do?