Circling Back - 2023 Bit Madness Elite 8 (plus Nepo Babies and Ski Accidents)
Episode Date: March 22, 2023Well, we're in the home stretch. We've whittled all the bits down to a Final Four after today's episode of absolute bithousery. We also discuss the recent #NepoBaby content that's hit the TL, Gwyneth ...Paltrow's ski accident lawsuit in Deer Valley, This Weekend in Fun, and more. Enjoy a free two-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel — www.youtube.com/circlingback Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (22:00) Nepo Babies Renting Choppers (40:00) Gwyneth Paltrow Ski Lawsuit (52:45) Bit Madness, Elite 8 (1:07:00) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Rhoback: www.rhoback.com (BACKER20 for 20% off) Stamps: www.stamps.com/circlingback (4-week trial, free postage, and a digital scale) Rocket Money: www.rocketmoney.com/circling --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
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all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from austin texas
my name is will to freeze to my left david roth
oh sorry you caught me mid sip i'm sipping on that stormio you you knew exactly when you were gonna get intro like i didn't catch you mid-sip you took you took a sip mid-intro lately you've
been doing uh intros that are with like nicknames and they take a couple seconds longer you clearly
heard the intro i would sneak one in but this
stormio you know about 18 seconds into every single podcast the words dave roth are going to
come out of my mouth man oh storms are coming they call me stormzy you gotta sip that stormio non-stop
no one's ever called you that and there's already someone very prominent that has that name dylan
no they they used to call them that but now it's me because of my my slipping on that f5
dylan no they used to call them that but now it's me because of my my sipping on that f5 who who ordered the malozio from nespresso because those are trash we didn't get it this time are you
sure no we did we got we got both guess what uh a lot of the nespresso pods are either the small
johns that give you like you know two ounces ounces espresso, or they don't fit into our espresso machine.
So what I'm trying to say is options are limited if you want a full like eight ounce cup of coffee.
We have two options.
What else do you need?
Shut up.
Small Johns.
You know you can fit the smaller ones into our machine, right?
No, I know.
But they give you smaller cups of coffee.
No, I know.
I want that gas. I know. I want that gas.
I know.
I'm just saying.
We bought the bad tasting one again.
Small John's in the Eastside, boys.
I don't think they're that bad, and I will drink them.
There's one that tastes so bad that it makes me wonder
if there's something wrong with our Nespresso machine.
Like if we need to clean my tubes.
The tubes need to clean.
It needs to be descaled.
Then descale it, dude.
You're our janitor around here.
You do the bathroom.
You vacuum.
I don't know how to descale it.
What does that mean?
Exactly.
Is that because you don't like handling fish?
People at South By were like,
so how is your business going to scale?
I was like, dude, I don't fucking know what that means.
But Dylan can descale the coffee machine.
I'm like, can you just help me with this Nespresso i'm trying to set that stormio i'll just have to
google it i suppose who is who is the person that made us buy the really expensive coffee machine
for the last office that has me the single worst coffee pot i've ever experienced my parents my
parents now own that the thing is so so do they have a giant spot on their floor from from coffee
constantly spilling i gotta i gotta say my dad did the thing that we didn't really even think to do, and he just ordered a replacement.
Yeah, that's probably the move.
For like $18.
Yeah, but there was seemingly nothing wrong with the pot.
It just poured like shit.
Well, I think what happened was people complained about it, and they issued not a recall, but an upgrade.
Let me upgrade,yonce so yeah we used that thing a total of like three times and one of them is when they sent us that death
metal coffee or whatever the fuck it was or like they're like the coffee that had like a skull and
bones on it oh that that's the barstool one it's called like death wish or something yeah somebody
sent us that it's the strongest coffee in the world.
And guess what?
It tastes like ass.
I didn't particularly like it.
Hey, shout out to the list.
Thank you to the listener who sent us Death Wish.
We really appreciate that.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that was really good.
It was actually Portnoy.
It was his way of apologizing for ghosting you.
I'm sorry.
It's fine.
I simply didn't try it because I'm too scared i don't drink coffee
it's called death wish it does pack a punch why you let you cherish life yeah
after even the sanctity after i had my eight espresso shot iced americano before a wedding
and had a panic attack i've refused to overinate. I'd rather under-caffeinate.
Caffeination.
No sleeping.
Bro, you should check out this Huberman Labs I could send you.
Dude, so have you guys heard about this podcast called Huberman Labs?
I was actually listening to Huberman Labs the other day.
Huberman Labs did Rogan, dude. Dude, so this is going to blow your mind, but did you know that cold plunges actually benefit you?
That's not breaking news. You want to start cold plunging? benefit you doesn't that's not breaking news you want to start cold
plunging i did the other day i am thirsty as fuck for a cold plunge sponsor i've already sent brad
some and it just hasn't panned out if you're a cold plunge company out there we'd love to earn
your business somebody out there is i love it dude there's no better feeling in the world just
take an ice bath no it's not the same.
Ice isn't cheap.
I don't have enough ice maker in my freezer.
Coke plunges are not cheap.
No, they're not.
They pay for themselves, basically.
How?
I don't know.
I was listening to Hube's, Huberman Lab.
You know, he did Rogan recently.
It just pays.
It's longevity play.
Anyway, I can't really explain it it i'll just send you the link yeah i can just go to the top of the itunes charts and see the niche uh medical
advice that everyone's touting these days sup dylan dylan shivery ladies and gentlemen he's
out here just looking tan as hell in his peach shirt.
You know it's peach, right?
No, it's orange.
Oh, a little peach.
Randy, what do you think, Randy?
I mean, peach and orange are very similar.
I would say it's a little more peach than orange.
It goes a little more pink, making it peach.
Catch me on peach.
That D Chivary.
It's probably not even what it was.
You probably signed up as Roger J. Dorn on Peach at that point.
So the PGA Tour was very kind enough to give us four passes for the WGC for tomorrow, along with a nice little food and alcohol voucher thing.
Why do you have to stunt on people?
No, there's a story.
Okay. I offered it up to my friends, my high school buddies.
Like, hey, I might as well be a nice guy and say, hey, if anyone doesn't have a ticket, I got you for tomorrow.
By the way, it's got this voucher along with it.
My buddy Michael, the shithead that he is, he's like, oh, I got an 1899 badge that you can have.
I was like, oh, that's very nice.
Thank you.
Gives you access to the clubhouse and all that.
It's like for the members.
And he's like, but it's going to cost you.
It's going to cost you.
Still just flexing on people?
It's going to cost you some vouchers. I was like fuck like i'm out of your time be a nice guy now i'm in the
middle of a negotiation right now i gotta tell you man it's probably worth it you should it's
probably not those badges are tight you gotta pay for drinks in there it's cool for cloud they've
got better merch it's a cloud play they have the acc merch up there yeah like it doesn't you also
get to see one hole yeah it's great yeah you get to see one hole. Yeah, it's great.
Yeah, you get to see
one approach shot,
which is super fun.
You get to go stand in the AC
with rich people.
What I hate about...
What I hate about...
Like, I love...
I love match play.
I love going to the tournament.
I hate the way
that everyone in Austin
starts to move like snakes
once the ticket situation
starts to pan out.
What's going on?
Like, everyone starts...
The pissing contest
officially starts once the badges start to come out. And that starts the pissing contest officially starts once the
badges start to come out.
And that's what I'm that's what
just makes me crazy.
I just want to be out there and
see the boys just absolutely
draining pots, man.
I want to watch the boys play.
I want to see them getting
buttery around the greens.
Honestly, I want to follow.
I want to find one of my favorite
golfers and I want to follow him.
Tom Hoagie for at least 10 holes. I want to watch Rory. I want to find one of my favorite golfers, and I want to follow him for at least 10 holes.
I want to watch Rory.
I want to watch Hove.
I do want to watch Scotty.
I've never seen Scotty in person.
I just submitted my best and final to Mike.
Who's your favorite PGA player to see live right now?
My best and final offer?
To who?
To Michael.
Oh, you're a counter offer.
I'll be honest.
The negotiations between you and your buddies for badges that we don't benefit from are kind of hitting the same way as your master shit.
It's a merch play for y'all, too.
I don't.
I'm good.
All right, man.
I'll just go fuck myself.
You can do that.
I'm excited, though, man.
Tomorrow's going to be the day.
Who do you want to see tomorrow, Dave?
I'm getting into one tomorrow.
Try to ask Dave an actual question about the tournament.
If you throw me a beer.
Okay.
If you throw me a beer, I will Teen Wolf it.
What's my guy's name?
Let me know if you need.
Minwoo Lee.
Do you want me to mute Dylan while you actually answer the question that I've been trying to ask you?
No one cares who Dave wants to see.
I want to go see Minwoo Lee and see if he's wearing his uh his oakley oakley blades or why wouldn't he be dude he's sick he's sick he's a fucking he's it
does not give a fuck he had when he did the mock turtleneck mullet combo it's just like dude you're
firing on all cylinders everything cam smith they thought cam smith was this dude's like stop stop i he the new cam i will
shit on the live tour as much as anybody but cam smith is way too cool to be on the live tour he
needs to be back on tour do you think now that the the pga is uh evolving that these guys want
their invite their their live i mean their pga status back i mean i i don't know bigger purses
uh they're they're doing like the no cut thing now, and they're doing all that shit.
Bryson seems to think that it doesn't really matter, and it's all going to smooth itself out very soon.
So he's not concerned about it.
Well, he's a douchebag.
That doesn't have anything to do with his thought, though.
Oh.
But those guys, I mean, they still have a huge bag that they're sitting on, which is pretty nice.
What you got in that bag?
I don't know if they have regrets.
They might feel stupid because they have such shitty ratings at this point.
But I think feeling –
But it's really hard to feel that stupid
when your bank account's got a few commas in it
that it didn't have before.
Tres comas?
I don't think they became billionaires.
Is there any golfer other than Bryson that is super into Huberman Labs?
You know Bryson is like...
You know Kisner's not.
No, Kisner doesn't even know what a podcast is.
Kisner's like, what?
What the fuck is a podcast?
He's like, the only thing I listen to is foreplay, which is probably true.
He probably knows what a podcast is.
That is a podcast, though.
He's a foreplay guy.
That's fine.
That's fine.
That's fine.
We've got uh
who's our golfer smiley john peters we have smiley on i don't think he plays anymore neither is smiling yeah john peterson hey john see ya yeah if you're ever a guest on our podcast
and uh we have you on and we promote your brand, and we really put it out there for you.
The best way to stay in good graces with us is to not shit on us
while also promoting our episode.
Do the pledges.
No, save it.
That doesn't come out until tomorrow.
The pledges.
Were you not on Twitter last night?
The pledges, Steve.
Everyone's already seen it, David.
I was in Carve with KJ.
Everyone's already seen it.
It's already gone vi, dog.
Oh, we clipped it?
Nice.
Hi, buddy.
Do you just not check Twitter anymore, Dave?
I'm worried about you.
I was at dinner with Brett and KJ.
What about Slack, dog?
I like the old Dave that was just in the trenches out here on Twitter.
Yeah.
You know, social media used to mean something to you.
Do you have the Slack app on your phone, David?
Yes.
You got Noties turned on?
My Noties turn off at 5 p.m no offense to anybody here i just don't care
you can set notice to turn off at a certain time you can snooze yeah you can snooze uh
snooze your stuff on slack oh how about that i mean no no offense to our company as a whole but
really there's nothing so urgent going on on Slack outside of the office hours that
I just don't think it's necessary to get those
notifications from anybody.
It's a good clip.
I just saw it. It's very cool. It's a phenomenal clip.
How'd you watch a two-minute clip in
15 seconds?
Just kidding.
Well, you were a car with KJ. I heard
you had quite the order last night.
Yeah, I did the thing that you're not supposed to do when you go out to dinner.
And that's eat quesadilla, fajita quesadilla from Motti's about an hour before.
So I wasn't very hungry.
But I felt like I didn't want to be the guy at the table because we actually sat in the dining room.
I didn't want to be the guy who was just drinking.
I don't know why.
So I ordered a wedge salad.
And then I ordered salmon cakes.
Panko, lightly fried.
Panko crusted.
I got to say, they were very good.
But Pesco Dave, dude.
I was not feeling a steak after going.
You front rimmed that so hard.
After going chicken fa dia, I was not feeling a steak. You front-rimmed that so hard. After going chicken pho, dia, I was just like...
Dude, there's nothing wrong with a salmon cake, Dave.
I've never had one.
Quite good.
They sometimes have them at Central Market, dude.
And honestly, it's a great meal.
You can put it over a bed of lettuce, maybe some mixed greens.
I don't want to talk about this anymore.
Why?
I just don't want to talk about this anymore why i just don't want to talk about this why i can salmon cake salmon cakes we'll ask that's why it's brick it's not a brick dude do you have any pics
send the pics to randy on slack so that he can put them on the screen i didn't take any pics of
that i did try to take a pic of brett and kj looking for celebs but yeah what celebrities did brett see last night we thought we saw uh well i thought i
saw uh tyrell hatton okay the tiny uh nice he's more than a tiny lad but he is a he's a short king
it wasn't him it was just a different short king did it take like a google search for you to realize that i feel like i feel like he's famous enough or at least on television enough that i
can look at him yeah there's someone in a restaurant and say definitively whether or not it's him and
then confirm with the accent yeah um yeah i i knew when i watched him walk to the bathroom i was like
oh that could be him and i'm like oh that's definitely not him but i still waited and like kept looking to see when he left the bathroom just to make sure and i was like oh
yeah that's not even close that's just some guy a guy's name is probably like david or chad or
something that's your name too that's my name as well yeah man that's weird that you almost saw
two hatton yeah yeah dude that's crazy's fucking crazy damn dude yeah well y'all asked so excuse me i feel like i feel like you're
taking our reaction to this as sarcasm i think it's very cool that you almost saw that honestly
that's so sick oh storms are coming stop We're not doing free Nespresso reads.
We've done plenty.
I mean, we did a black, what was it, Black Rifle Coffee?
Or was it the Barstool one?
We didn't do Black Rifle Coffee.
What was it, Death Metal Coffee?
Death Wish.
Death Wish, sorry.
Death Metal Coffee's a good name.
That's not a Barstool one, is it?
That's not a Barstool property.
I don't know.
They definitely promoted it for a long time.
I don't know what it is.
It wasn't owned by Barstool. I think Death Wish Coffee is simply... They just promoted it for a long time. I don't know what it is. It wasn't like owned by Barstool.
I think Death Wish Coffee is simply.
They just sponsored Barstool.
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Anyway.
What?
Hey, back to the Pwedge thing.
Like, you got to listen to to tomorrow's patreon episode
like you're not subscribed yet you're just a big old dum-dum you're missing some fire content
patreon.com circling back podcast we're doing two-week trials don't be a dum-dum
are we ever taking away the two-week trials that's just a thing we do forever no
i'm fine leaving it forever we're gonna let it ride for a while for sure like i'm not trying
to say i'm not trying to be like, oh, go now.
We have a two-week trial.
I'm more just being like, there's a two-week trial,
so go try it.
It's not out of care.
Yeah.
We're playing hard to get here, while also being very easy to get.
Yeah, we're giving you a taste of the action.
We also did Do You Know It yesterday, a game show podcast,
where Randy chooses who he wants to win beforehand
and then gives them softballs the entire time.
We also do Exactly 5 Minutes and Touching Base, our conspiracy podcast.
And as always, we do voicemails, 888-618-4422.
Again, 888-618-4422.
If you want your voicemail played, make it happen.
And then Fridays, we're doing the Love Island voice.
Guys, I'm sorry.
I'm not going to be here for tomorrow's episode.
Oh, no.
I will say – or by tomorrow, I mean Friday's episode.
I will say, I'm glad that it's not the final episode of the Love Island boys.
We still have one more.
It's the final episode.
It's not.
It's not the final episode of the Love Island boys.
I just said that and Dylan completely contradicted it.
I'm sorry.
Based on how everything's...
Did you guys watch last night's episode?
Yeah.
Snooze Fest.
I didn't watch it yet.
I almost feel like they need to do like a blood sacrifice
to get some stuff going in this villa.
They were just like fawning over each other.
Like, oh, my brother's for life.
That kind of shit.
It's like, all right.
Brothers for life.
I'm like, all right.
Yeah, they need to do something.
They need to do something aggressive to shake things up.
But honestly, it's been a fun season.
This has been one of my favorite seasons of love island actually it's been good man yeah
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circling and i got some question marks dude i saw i saw the question marks here dave yes take the rock
um
headline here says sofia coppola's daughter romi goes viral after saying she was grounded for
trying to charter a helicopter uh in a tiktok which randy if you could queue her up um she explains this and i will say this
has got the tiktok um effects so it goes a little quick but let's just give it a listen thank you
for thank you for bringing this to the podcast i had no idea we were going to talk about this today
and and this would have been a miss to to not discuss have you seen this dylan you've seen it
yes yes yeah i i went into it last night before bed i'm not so you wanted to have dinner with And this would have been a miss to not discuss. Have you seen this, Dylan? You've seen it? Yes.
Yes.
Yeah.
I went into it last night before bed.
I have not.
She wanted to have dinner with a friend.
So she wanted to have dinner with a friend.
So she tried to charter a helicopter on her parents' credit card.
She then got in trouble.
So now she's grounded and she's making dinner at home on TikTok.
And she pretty much pours out her parents for never being around and said, like, these are my other parents and just show some random dude.
It's her babysitter's husband and it looks like there's absolutely no accountability
with the babysitter's husband like that guy doesn't give a fuck he's just there petting the
dog yeah he's just like yeah what what are you doing oh cool whatever like you're not my kid
whatever like this scares me i i have actual concerns about when our kids are old enough to have social media.
Dylan should be absolutely petrified right now.
The homie's getting there fast.
What's the protocol when your kid starts to approach the age where they get a cell phone and then you have to deal with this?
I am going – I don't want to be the dad that restricts his access to certain things.
I don't want to be the dad that like restricts his access to certain things but I think it's it's probably like pretty commonplace these days with parents who give their phones or their kids
phones for the first time you know I don't want them just have free reign of like whatever he
wants but don't you just assume that kids know how to get out of that shit easier than we do
like I guarantee that parks will be able to like undo any kind of thing faster than well the thing
I want to talk about him the most is that
like look if you put something on the internet it is there for the rest of your life like you
can delete it but it still lives on the internet somewhere like don't be a dumb dumb like
hypothetically like if he pooped his pants on the side of the road one time and then he wrote
something about it like that's on the internet that's on the internet like you can't you can't
go back and delete that right yeah or if he like says he just says something mean to somebody that
he shouldn't and then like you know it becomes a thing like i don't i don't want to be i don't
want him to get in trouble because of social media i don't want him sending um you know a d-pic
a d-pic to someone and it's like oh now your wiener's in the cloud it's like dude be smart
the fuck well
thank you for confirming that it worked far after we needed it one twitter user noted if more
nepotism babies were chaotic and open like this i would forgive almost anything can we listen to it
i don't disagree let's get the full effect because it's it is it is good this is romi
make vodka sauce pasta with me because i'm grounded because i tried to charter a helicopter Let's get the full effect, because it is good. This is Romy.
Make vodka sauce pasta with me because I'm grounded.
Because I tried to charter a helicopter from New York to Maryland on my dad's credit card because I wanted to have dinner with my girlfriend.
Okay, let's get started.
I don't know the difference between a garlic and an onion,
and I just have Google images of onions on my phone, and I'm embarrassed.
Also, I thought I would do this since I'm already grounded,
because my parents' biggest rule is I'm not allowed to have any public social media accounts. Here's why.
It's because they don't want me to be a nepotism kid.
But TikTok's not gonna make me famous, so it doesn't really matter.
Is this an audience?
Because I feel like this is a lovely audience. It looks like the kids aren't working, so...
And this? Yes, we're on. And this is Ari, my babysitter's boyfriend,
because my parents are never home, so these are my replacement parents.
I almost put the house down.
What do you think about the helicopter fiasco?
Oh, I like fiasco, because it's like a feminine form of fiasco. Oh, it's women's history month, so these are my replacement parents. I almost put the host down. What do you think about the helicopter fiasco? Oh, I like fiasco,
because it's like a feminine form of fiasco. Oh, it's
women's history month, so. Okay, well now I'm just waiting
for Ari to come back with my ingredients,
and I will see you in part two, where I actually make a pasta.
Fritz ever utters... Now let's watch part two.
Fritz ever utters the words, my parents are never
home, so these are my replacement parents.
He's getting his phone taken away.
Can't air him out like that. That would be a terrible keanu reeves movie the
replacement parents like the football one keanu's just your dad i watched on an airplane did you
charter a helicopter that movie fucking sucked oh keep it over 60 miles per hour people don't
like that movie right there's no it's not like a cult classic or else it'll blow up dad pass me a spoon there is no spoon matrix it's a matrix i didn't know that one very popular
one you never saw the matrix i did i didn't remember to call the line yeah you don't watch
it every weekend like me no i i didn't i didn't really care for it that much you don't cry at the
end no certainly not the least surprising thing in the world that dylan not a matrix guy when neo makes love
to trinity you don't cry i don't remember that part i think i saw it once that's enough for me
and it was probably 20 years ago it was maseek you didn't get absolutely like fucking bone stoned
and go to the theater and watch the machine battle no oh bone stoned
i like that you should dude if they ever put it
back in theaters
you should
you should fucking
hit a dab
what's your favorite
Sofia Coppola movie
I was about to say
I wasn't familiar
with Sofia Coppola
you're familiar
with her father
Francis Ford
yes I am
yeah I didn't know
that she was also
in the game
as they say
yeah
she's an Oscar winner
Lost in Translation
Virgin Suicides
Kirsten Dunst why'd you say that like Donald Trump She's an Oscar winner. Lost in translation. Virgin suicides.
Kirsten Dunst.
Why'd you say that like Donald Trump?
Kirsten.
What's she doing these days?
Not much.
Not winning awards.
I'm sorry.
Did she actually take the helicopter?
No.
They shut it down?
Dude, she was just going to not tell anybody,
hop on the Uber helicopter and just go visit her friend from camp.
I don't see a problem.
Sofia Coppola's net worth is only $40 million.
That's not my daughter can take a helicopter to the Hampies.
That's helicopter Uber money. You know who her dad is, right? That's not don't think take a helicopter to the Hampies. That's helicopter Uber money.
You know who her dad is, right? But that's not like, that's not, don't think about it, helicopter Uber money.
Who's her poppy?
Or the husband, Sophia's husband.
Who's he?
He's the lead singer of Phoenix.
Phoenix TX?
You're familiar with the band Phoenix?
Don't act like you're not.
Give me a stanza.
I just did.
That's how I like the intro.
I want my Stormzy shit right now.
Hold on.
You got to stop, dude.
Honestly, you don't have the resume for Stormzy to even try to claim that.
Used to date Maya Jammin, no?
Just stop.
No, that was Banksy.
I don't like you using secondhand information to try to get try to get credibility in the storms you gave am i wrong bitch you probably don't think you
don't even know how to bossy bop you think i don't know how to fucking bossy bossy bop are
you fucking serious what is that phoenix song 1901 list of mania the song is 1901
it's a good song i look i'm not gonna act like i was the biggest
phoenix guy they should have let her take this fucking helicopter dude can you imagine what
nick adams would think looking at a crowd full of phoenix fans what does a phoenix fan look like i
don't know i just imagine a bunch of dudes that like originally liked weezer and then transitioned
over to phoenix all right i liked weezer so it's just checking some boxes she seems weezer is one
band that i just never really understood i didn't think they i just never thought they were that
people liked the the second album pinkerton like way too much i didn't think it was that good
people find her pretty endearing from what i'm seeing who sofia or the daughter the daughter
yeah yeah no people aren't mad at her like that's the funny like i think one of the worst i think
one of the not the worst things this isn't a bad thing but like the the nepo baby column that came out that just like ripped into all nepo babies like the
entertainment that we get from these nepo babies is through the roof they didn't choose to be a
nepo baby no like they just got lucky yeah it's kind of like how bubba sparks didn't choose to
rhyme rhyman chose him exactly but like if if they're going to be posting TikToks
that are super unrelatable but entertaining,
I'm fine with that.
Dude, the thing about that booty
is it was rocking everywhere.
Please clarify that you're talking about Bubba Sparks
and not Sofia Coppola's daughter's TikTok.
Yes, that's about Bubba Sparks.
We just referenced Bubba Sparks.
Booty, booty, booty, booty rocking everywhere.
I just wanted to make sure.
Just wanted to make sure.
And it was, too.
Again, Bubba Sparks. I wonder how many followers she gained from this moment.
I don't know. Do you think her profile is public, even though she's not allowed to do that?
I don't know, but I don't want that in my search history.
I like how she said, yeah, her parents don't want her to have a public profile,
and she's not going to get famous from this anyway. But Dave, what website are you reading
this from? The Independent. Yeah, that's a big one. It's a big one. I think you're famous now,
Sofia Coppola's daughter. She's gone mainstream, dog. What's her name? Moby?
Moby. Romy. It's not Moby. Dude, you've been listening to any Moby lately? He got stalled by
Obie. I was listening to some Moby on the way to the PGA Superstore recently, and I have to say,
I was listening to some Moby on the way to the PGA Superstore recently, and I have to say, it still goes.
Look, Moby's had a lot of moments that aren't great.
I will say, some of his stuff was good.
I was more of a Fatboy Slim guy.
I was more into the Chemical Brothers, but Moby was fine.
Moby can put you into headspace for a few minutes if you let him.
His shit makes you feel like you're doing something important and grandiose.
But you're also doing it in the late 90s.s yeah and you're also not hooking up with chicks yeah and you're also dating natalie portman the entire time or not i totally get everything you guys are
talking about you're just not a moby guy not a moby guy moby claimed to date natalie portman
and natalie portman was like no i never what i never dated i've never met you
that's that's a good clout
builder if you can get it though the idea that he would just make up a very very well-known
a-list celebrity like a relationship that he had with her back in the day like yeah we used to date
like he thought he was gonna like get away with that i'm gonna i want to start a rumor that i
dated like katie perry or something to see if like it sticks or she has to like publicly like nah dude that'd be good for me
think about it i'm just trying to think of why katie perry was the first person to pop
this guy did he really see she was getting dragged on the tl yesterday for uh yeah for
for being an american idol host which is lame but like let her do her thing it sounds like a great way to spend
a couple months she's not doing bops anymore isn't she a new mom too i don't know like let the let
the girl be a judge on american idol if i get the american idol judge bag right now i'd take that
immediately there's no way that show is doing is doing so well that those celebs make a ton of
money though right bullshit right did i guarantee american
idol still scorching really i don't know dude you don't underestimate how the numbers that like fox
nbc abc and those shows do a lot of money in tvt they lost simon though right
yeah but yeah it doesn't get good but now they've got Howie Mandel, right?
Or is that a different show?
It's a different show.
Who wants to be a millionaire?
Randy, you corrected me way too quick.
Do you watch that shit?
I just know...
Simon Cowell and Howie are on Americans Got Talent.
All right, ready?
Why'd you say talent?
I don't know.
I think it's Lionel Richie, Luke Bryan, and Katy Perry.
Okay, guess how much Luke Bryan made on American Idol as a host.
Like in one season?
Yeah, I don't know.
Sure, yeah.
2018.
$3 million.
Lionel Richie made $10 million, and Luke Bryan made $12 million.
Katy Perry's a bigger star than both of those at this point.
I think what she did's okay.
How's Lionel Richie making less than Luke Bryan?
They're paying too much for these guys.
I think you... Dude, you're underestimating... what she did is okay. How is Lionel Richie making less than Luke Bryan? They're paying too much for these guys.
I think you,
dude,
you're underestimating American Idol.
Ready?
Like Survivor's still on the air
and that's not a coincidence.
Like,
there's still a very large
portion of America
that really just watches Fox
or CBS.
All right,
so Dylan walks out
and he tries to sing a song,
a Cranberry song, and goes to Simon.
He just looks at Dylan and goes, that was dreadful.
Pretty dreadful.
Not good.
Not good?
What did Howie McDowell –
Hold on.
Did he turn into Donald Trump?
You're doing the orange man right now.
Believe me.
Dreadful.
A new talent.
You don't have it.
Okay.
If Trump was on American Idol, I would become a viewer immediately.
He would just rip into people.
Not great at all.
Dude, they should do like an American Idol, but like for business.
Oh my God.
And then Donald Trump is the host.
The apprentice.
You're fired.
You guys hear that Donald Trump actually kind of wants to get arrested?
Why?
This is per the failing New York Times.
Apparently, he's a little into the idea of getting arrested and dragged through with
all the paparazzi around him.
Bad boy.
And he's apparently debating whether or not he would smile in said photos.
Look, the guy knows content.
The guy doesn't give a fuck.
He knows content.
Taking me to jail.
Going to the clink.
He knows content.
He knows the benefit of a fire pick of him getting dragged in.
But apparently the media frenzy around it would be so large
that they wouldn't do that anyway.
It wouldn't get my perp walk.
So he didn't get arrested yesterday.
He needs his perp walk, dude.
Rowdy gentleman will put that on his shirt.
Oh, dude.
Rowdy gentleman would be all over the perp walk.
It would be the most famous mugshot of all time, right?
Who's the most famous mugshot of all time right now johnny cash you
ever check out mugshot shotties yeah yeah i have that's a group text fave that's a high school
group escobar's mugshots really gonna say escobar's is it more famous than johnny cash
jimmy hendrix i can't even picture johnny cash's it, I just Googled most famous of all time,
and the first thing that came up was Sinatra, Escobar.
Elvis?
This Elvis one can't be serious.
There's no way they let him keep his glasses on for a mugshot.
I don't know, man.
He's Elvis.
I think the most famous one uh
might be sinatra bro i had that i had that post in my room and escobar
kind of sick do you guys have a mugshot i do not thankfully i tried to acquire mine but uh
the campus police did not give me my mugshot.
It's the only part of me that kind of wishes I was arrested by the city instead of the campus.
I think it would have been way doper to have a cool mugshot that I could have used later in life.
I googled Will DeVries mugshot and it came up with the Ross.
Ross Bolin?
Yeah.
Oh, Ross has a famous mugshot.
Yeah, Ross's mugshot's not not famous.
I mean, yeah, I didn't even think about that,
but I don't think he uses it anymore, but he used to.
He's got a kid now.
I can understand.
He's got a kid.
Maybe retiring the mugshot after the kid comes out.
Yeah.
You don't have to.
It'll be a funny story one day.
Chartering a helicopter.
What's that going to run you?
25K?
That's around my guess.
30K?
I'm telling you, the Uber ones are, like, pretty affordable.
If that's what she used.
Oh, wow.
Do you want to change the way you phrase that?
Pretty affordable?
Okay.
What's the damage on that, Dylan?
In the hundreds.
Not in the thousands.
Affordable for, like, look, I'm i'm not gonna i've never done it you can hear dave dave's fingers are moving quick right now dude
he is checking your ass what are you seeing david what do you got actually dude dylan dylan might be
vindicated am i right we don't have that in austin this's 200 to 225 dollars per ride yeah so see how is that
economical okay if you get a squad together you want to go uh pop over to uh i don't know
where do you want to go i don't know place with a helipad nearby if you get us if you get the
squad together get your sticks go out to uh spanish oaks play around fly back i would only
want to do it if they let me, like, rappel down the,
or, like, you know, go down the rope
to, like, drop in. I'm pretty scared of
helicopters, not gonna lie. I don't want to, I don't
ever want to get in a helicopter. I don't know that I've ever been
in one. I've never been in a
helicopter. At this
point, it'll take a decent amount
for me to get in one. I'll either have to be, like,
severely injured. Get through the
chopper. But, like, I'm not not i'm not getting in a helicopter in austin texas for no reason i did arnold
the only places that i might do it's got to be tropical i might need to go i might need to be
seeing some shit i just don't want to do it man i would go heli skiing i really would like to go
heli skiing one day dude i've done heli skiing stop i do do why i just don't trust them man i don't trust those blades
i just don't really i mean just the amount of helicopters that go down versus other things
if those blades stop spinning you're going down if you're in a plane and the engine goes out you
can at least like glide to would you do that or a hot air balloon uh a helicopter probably because there's no i'm not it's not like open to the air you know
i can close myself in and feel safer i would rather put like a hundred balloons and like
tie them together and then just hold on to a bar and just float around what bar
dick saloon yeah it's gonna take more than 100 day how many balloons did david blaine use 69 really i don't know i don't know but they weren't they weren't like
balloons you get at walmart though they're like you know they're meant for what he was doing
they weren't like birthday balloons he didn't go to party city he used 52
he used 52 yes what kind of bad what kind of balloons
are they though modos helium party city yeah i'm trying to i'm trying to go up a couple thousand
feet what do you got well i just googled how i like when i started typing how many balloons one
of the first things that comes up is how many balloons to lift a person so like i love people
out here just trying to float away what does it say i i don't i think it depends on the balloons guys like yeah it does it definitely do you
remember like uh a month ago when we were just uh scrambling jets to shoot down balloons and stuff
that was awesome and then like nobody ever talks about it anymore it was a weird time it was a
weird four or five days i'm just saying it's funny. All right. How many balloons do you all think it would take?
Normal balloons.
Foot.
Birthday style balloons.
How many birthday balloons do you think it would take to lift one person that weighs 100 pounds?
100 pound person.
That's a small little John.
How many?
I'm going to say, obviously, filled with helium.
I'm going to say 350.
No, that's not enough.
600. Dave?
I'm going to say
85.
The number's much
larger than I expected. This says
if you used a small spherical
balloon, one foot diameter,
holds about.526 cubic feet
of gas, it would take over 2,754 balloons to lift 100 pounds.
Hey, Dave, maybe stick to net worths, pal.
You're not good at the balloon thing.
I was doing a metric system, idiot.
I'm getting, for Parks' birthday this year,
I'm getting him 2,700 balloons.
He doesn't weigh 100 pounds.
He'll go up like a freaking...
Oh, so we need less than that.
Yeah.
He can bring a squad member.
Okay.
He'll bring his bestie. How much do eight-year-olds weigh uh he's small on the small side but they probably
weigh like 60. somewhere in there dale that's what's up yeah that's what's up i just had
something in my throat and i coughed and like eyes are welling up. Can we do this?
Get a balloon?
Or 2,700.
We could try it.
I want to see something go really high in the sky.
What's that smell?
Has Dude Perfect tried?
It's a great question.
I can't imagine they haven't at least entertained the idea.
Something smells good.
Is that my Stormzy? Stop. Oh stop oh i know it's this next story oh i guess dave's ready to move on well
will pulled it up i'm putting it on him you guys see this lawsuit that's going on are you doing a
candle play are you the fuck it's dylan you're overthinking the game right now i think i think dave went
straight pervy with it and i'm just calling him out on it that's what i think oh you went that
deep that's so deep to go that yeah but that's such a that's how much this guy is that's such
a deep transition look at him best in the game see told you i i read that might be too deep i
read this that might be too deep dog horny this fucking dude. That might be too deep, dog.
Horny.
I was just talking about this coffee.
Gwyneth Paltrow.
She's getting sued.
She's getting sued for $300,000 due to a ski accident in Deer Valley.
You guys familiar with Deer Valley?
I just went there.
Apparently, she got in a ski accident with dr terry sanderson you guys
familiar with his work dr t dr terry sanderson yep uh he's suing her because of a hit and run crash
that he described as reckless that apparently left him with some brain injuries and damages
hold up he alleges that she hit him and then uh skied off in a hit and run style fashion that's kind of sick if this
is true well is it so what what i've discovered what i've discovered is that she's counter suing
him oh no imagine you're imagine you're going down like a blue you're taking your time and then
someone smacks into you like it hurts and they and you're like the was that fucking
gwyneth paltrow and she's just like throwing deuce as she's tearing down the mountain like fuck you
maybe throwing the finger over her shoulder well she says she's countersued insisting that he was
the one who ran into her and that she stayed at the scene she's asking the court to force
sanderson to pay her legal fees and a paltry one dollar in damages that's so petty i fucking love
that's the rich person way of...
That's the loaded person of a counter-suing.
I don't need it.
This is just to fuck with you.
That's what Taylor Swift did to the guy who grabbed her ass.
In the photo.
Yep.
She sued him for $1.
That's so swag.
Oh, I forgot about that.
Did she win?
Yeah.
Did he pay you up?
I think he might have paid up.
If I'm her, I'm like, don don't even i'm never cashing that check he grabbed her butt yeah i missed this i think he was a radio host and they were doing like a meet and greet kind of thing and they were
posing for a photo in front of a step and repeat and he groped her what a dickhead yeah yeah probably
not cool fuck that i want to go on record that when I see Taylor on Friday, I do not plan on doing any of that.
You can't just go around pinching backsides, man.
Oh.
Unless you're Eugene.
Unless you're my friends and Dave's around.
Yeah.
He's got my permission.
Yeah.
She allegedly said that she's been skiing for years,
and she's skied Deer Valley numerous times.
It's kind of an unnecessary flex.
Flex in the suit. That place is wild. she's been skiing for years and she's skied Deer Valley numerous times. It's kind of an unnecessary flex.
Flex in the suit.
That place is wild.
It's a very Gwyneth Paltrow place to get in a ski accident.
It's a very rich person's mountain.
If she did ski away, that's not cool.
If she didn't ski away
and this guy's just trying to get the bag
because it's Gwyneth Paltrow.
But there's no proof. There's no proof. There she didn't ski away and this guy's just trying to get the bag because it's Gwyneth Paltrow. But there's no proof.
There's no proof.
There's no actual video of this.
How do you even come to a conclusion here?
Witnesses.
Were there witnesses?
Yeah, but you know all these witnesses are just going to be riding for their side of things.
He just wants that candle money.
She's going to win this.
Yeah.
She's going to win this. Why would gwyneth paltrow ski off
embarrassment i mean people people do hit and runs all the time daily not when you're one of
the most recognizable people she's wearing ski stuff you don't know it's gwyneth paltrow i don't
think that i don't think a ski collision commands a lawsuit i kind of think you assume that risk
when you get out on the mountain you said brain injury this guy's got a real brain injury isn't
what can you get can you sue someone for having a brain injury because of a sport that you were
willingly participating in yes why like what's the basis i'm not i'm not trying to be like, I'm just asking. No, no, no. Okay. You gave me a very lawyer yes.
Yes.
You're about to do it in dawn.
I know I was.
I can't stop.
I can't stop thinking about him getting arrested.
Yeah, because if she's alleging that he did it recklessly, that was the mindset when he did it.
So he was not of, there was a risk involved that he was,
uh, disregarding. So yeah, you basically can't, uh, this happened to me. I didn't get sued,
but the first time I snowboarded in ninth grade, I was going down the bunny Hill,
trying to learn how to snowboard fell and a lady skiing zoom by from behind me.
She clipped my board and just tumbled down the bunny slope.
Her husband yelled at me
and I just snowboarded off.
This happens all the time.
It's her fault.
This happens all the time.
Was it?
She went into me.
That's exactly what we're looking at with these two.
I believe you.
I don't believe you.
Okay. I don't believe you okay I don't know
I don't know whose side I'm on
I also don't know if I have all the facts
I kind of hope she loses
just because it's Gwyneth Paltrow
she'll be just fine
what is he looking for in damages
if you're Gwyneth P her, you can afford 300K.
So she must really think she's in the right
if she's willing to go to court and just deal with this, right?
Couldn't she just pay him 300K?
Yeah, this sounds like a principle out of principle.
Yeah, I think she knows she's going to win this.
How excited are you to tell your friends
that going to pelt her will just smoke to you on the
mountain when you get back to the cabin like the cabin or whatever i might do something illegal
next time i go to a dope like vacation location so i can uh have to go back there for court dates
and shit you can just go back whenever you want really just gonna cost you some money
yeah that's probably true it's probably a better way of doing it just taking another vacation book
a vacation wherever you want right now really yeah but like i can tell sally like oh babe no
i'm legally obligated to go out to like fucking pebble beach yeah it's good you vandalized jim
nance's property yeah yeah i pissed on jim nance's property now i'm a i'm a sex offender
i mean worth it though dude is it worth it
dude for the nance story is it worth it do you think nance turns you in
someone's peed on his bushes i mean someone pees on our office every day he's got that
little miniature uh what is it the amen corner hole number 12 he's got what it is he's got a
little part three or is it pebble he recreated a hole like a miniature i think it's
pebble okay dave do you worry that like the lady who went over your snowboard do you worry that
she's gonna find out you have a podcast now and she's gonna come after you for damages
statute of limitations maybe she was skiing behind she first of all she was a good skier
i fell and i was sitting there and like you you know, I got my board, my feet up and she just,
just hit the board.
She could have, she could have hit me.
And then we'd be singing a whole different story.
How many boards did she get that game?
This is a rebounding joke.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
It sounded good in my head. I regret it.
It's kind of the story of the show.
I might like...
If I ever see Gwyneth Paltrow skiing,
I might try to run into her.
Get her number and be like,
yo, you want to link and build?
You know what?
She's not exactly stout.
She is a very thin built person.
Dylan runs into Gwyneth Paltrow on the slopes
and she's getting laid out. Are you saying I'm fat? No, I'm just saying that you pack a little more runs into gwyneth paltrow on the slopes and she's getting laid out are you saying i'm fat no i'm just saying that you pack a little more punch
than gwyneth paltrow does she's very very thin famously yeah i've been going hard at the gym
you know that about me day we know that about you tell us about it god and we have to walk
oh my god with you smelling because you don't shower if you work out what's up with that oh
weird shoulders were on fire you gotta start showering before you come into work dog do i smell i don't know i have a terrible
sense of smell what about other people i wasn't gonna say anything but you don't let me just say
this you don't smell like a goop candle sadly i don't want to smell like that i don't know
their candles are decent but that one smells like a they have my stamp of approval
i've got some goop sunscreen at home see what you just did see what you just did it's different
you just he just threw a lob up to himself watch he's about to put it home do it
super goop is different than goop i made that mistake i can do it that's not goop
it's different different company oh maybe i don't have any you got that
super goop i do have super i should say my wife has super ball still in the air
you got some super goop the ball's still in the air he's about to take it well go and get it
i think the ball went out of bounds now we have now we have to inbound it again
get a reset yeah we got i i i stepped on that transition. You stomped on it?
I stomped on it.
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It's elite.
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Let's fucking go.
Is this the penultimate?
Penultimate episode of Bit Madness 2023.
It's time to ride.
Where are we starting? If you're new to this program, we've been doing this for the last couple weeks. of Bit Madness 2023. It's time to ride.
Where are we starting?
If you're new to this program, we've been doing this for the last couple weeks.
We got Bit Madness going.
We got a bracket of every bit that we have from the year.
Our listeners have ranked them,
and we've put them into bracket form,
and now we are going to decide who makes the final four.
To anyone who is out there voting, following along,
to anyone who's made their own bracket, we thank you.
The winner will be getting a Hardy gift certificate to the Wash Media store,
something to get excited about.
It would be cool if it was a Hardee's discount.
No, dude.
Hardee's is mid as fall.
Shout out to the Midwest.
You know what the Midwest is?
Do they have Hardys there?
They got them in Oklahoma.
Or they used to.
That's the Midwest.
Sorry.
No, it's not.
It's not.
It's one hill I'll die on.
Let's fucking get into it, man.
You got number eight
in the too much dip bracket.
Number eight is Br brick merriman
going against himself in the number two slot we got brett spotting fake celebrities at carve
this is this is this might be dave for the next next year since he did that last night
yeah a little bit different but um brett spotting fake celebrities moves on for me and that's where
i come out dude i heard i heard terryl hatton was at carve last night really did you confirm
one of my boys said he saw him taking a piss was it dave i said very clearly it was not him
oh it wasn't him you were so quick to choose this over Brick Merriman.
Brick Merriman's mean, I'll say it.
I feel bad.
After having dinner last night and having a heart-to-heart with Brett about his fits,
it's just like, you know what, Brett?
You got a good haircut.
You don't brick fits.
I don't really feel...
Honestly, I really don't feel bad about the Brick Merriman thing
because after the mistreatment that he got from uh dave portnoy uh at barstool
brick merriman is like a drop in the wall he's treated like a king drop in the wall yeah
the worst ever doing i honestly think that our listeners our listeners are more about the brick
merriman talk than we are like it's not a thing that we say in the office that often we might say
you bricked it randy randy would beg the differ. Randy likes it. Okay, but Randy also hangs out with Brett a lot more on the weekends.
They got that rapport.
I don't feel bad about Frank Manning.
No, I just like the – I think it's funnier that he just sees –
he thinks he sees very, very notable people and we're not sure if he really saw them.
Not that he's making it up.
I just don't know if he –
I think he gets more upset about the fake celebrities.
Really?
I don't know.
He puffs his chest out a little bit
talking about how he actually saw them.
We did see the Sandlot guy.
That's facts.
Benny the Jet.
No, Ham.
I don't know if I would have recognized
Benny the Jet Rodriguez.
What about James Earl Jones?
We didn't see him.
He's still alive.
Would you recognize the dog?
Great voice.
Very old.
Or a Michigan dog.
Sadly, the dog's probably not alive unless it's a 35-year-old dog, which is hilarious.
I think James Earl Jones is a Michigan boy.
That's very interesting.
Ready for this?
You ready for this?
Nah, he wasn't.
Okay.
That's awesome.'s awesome where's he
from though i don't have to know nah mississippi what mississippi who you voted for dog who dave
vote for you dave voted uh carv what'd you vote for i haven't yet you have no onus on you well
welcome to the onus section uh i'm going with uh i'm going with bricks i'm bricked up
i don't really have i don't really have a horse in this race i i'll be happy with either going
through this is oh gosh um this is tough man i think i have to go brick merriman though
i think i have to i i still get enjoyment out of it and hopefully it doesn't hurt
his feelings too much it's it's all fun and games can i get a little i need a little can i self
redeem can i self redeem he he has a house in james earl jones from the age of five was raised
by his grandparents on their farm in jackson michigan i feel much better about this okay i
feel much better about very cool okay i wasn't that off i wasn't that off can you do a james earl jones impression dylan no i don't no i can't go steer clear of that one man it's like i can't
hear his voice in my head right you don't impersonate like one of the greatest voices
of all times no offense i have one of the greatest voices of all time too yeah
sunday scary's bracket we got number two we got got number two. We got an absolute blue blood matchup here.
We got number two, Frat Dave versus number one,
Randy posting grams mid-pod.
Look, he's posting right now.
He's probably posting one now.
He's doing it right now.
He's over there on his hinge or whatever.
I would like to get my vote.
Swiping.
My vote out of the way.
Come.
It's Frat Dave for me.
You doing some swiping?
It's Frat Dave for me. You doing some swiping? It's frat Dave.
Why?
Swiping.
It gives me joy.
Not the –
I thought you were more of a joy me guy.
Dave, what are you doing?
I don't know what I'm doing.
I'm going to put it on you.
I like when Randy posts Graham's mid-pod.
Because, again, I'm probably the only one who can actually see him
because he tries to be sneaky.
I hear you.
It's a fine thing that he does.
It's not a Final Four team.
So I hate to say this, but one time –
It's a one seed.
There's been a couple times when Randy's done this,
and there's been a couple times when it has been so distracting
that it's taken away from either an ad read or maybe something we're promoting in-house.
And it's actually pissed me off that we're having that conversation.
I'd say about 80% of the time I'm in favor of it because I am team content.
But that 20% lingers.
Whereas anytime Frat Dave starts to bubble up, I get that excitement.
I get that excitement.
I think I have to go frat day.
Hey, look, it's a two beating a one.
That's going to happen.
I will say, I will say,
Randy posting Graham's mid-pod next year could be a problem
because I don't think I've gotten annoyed with it in months.
But I'm also a little bummed that we didn't realize
that Randy did it in the last episode from the Renaissance Fair.
Yeah.
That's a miss on us.
We're losing our fastball.
I'm the one sitting right here.
I should have seen it, but I didn't.
I don't feel like you spend any time on Instagram, though, during the pod.
No, that's Dylan.
Oh, Dylan's definitely.
Who's most likely to be on social medias during the pod?
I think it's probably Dylan.
Yeah, probably.
What was it?
Yesterday, you're like, oh, I just saw this video.
You're literally watching videos. Reverse basketball. He's like, dude like oh i just saw this video of uh you're literally watching videos reverse basketball he's like dude check out this
live leak video of reverse basketball this guy gets impaled by the pole damn randy's getting
a lot of love number 13 in the mail-in bracket is doug dimadome and number two on this side of
the bracket is the juxtaposition oh this is tough this is tough a two versus a 13 i haven't voted first yet i'm going doug dimadome it Ooh, this is tough. This is tough. A two versus a 13.
I haven't voted first yet.
I'm going Doug Dimmadome.
It's a stylistic matchup.
You know, throw the numbers out the window,
because at this point, it's just all about who's hot.
The juxtaposition's fun.
I do feel a little bad,
because Dylan just clearly hates it for some reason,
even though it's super innocent and not a big deal.
I don't actually feel bad.
I was just trying to sympathize with Dylan publicly. You you can't put yourself in his shoes yeah i mean he's
gotta sit there he obviously didn't know what that word meant until i started saying it he never
heard it probably never spelled it i think i taught you that word actually yeah i'm sure you
did bitch anyway i'm going with the two seed the juxtaposition wow oh i should have town we shouldn't have given bill in the owner's town
this was a big mistake i did it's fine it's a good bit it's another randy bit these are both
good bits like yeah randy gets a lot of joy out of both of these bits did you get did you get this
bit on uh espn dave i don't remember if you got your juxtaposition bit on the espn because the
other one i'm pretty sure was no i've never done espn really yeah huh it's just that's glaring hole in my resume
you've probably been on espn maybe that maybe espn too you've been in the crowd you've been
in the crowd on espn i was in that pickleball tournament i don't know if it was being simulcast
turn on college game day you were were pretty close to the court during
Dirk's last game, right? In the scenes
hype, it's just a crowd
of college students and
you know, 20-year-old
knuckleheads. And it's like, oh, you
see this tall-ass white hat just moving
its way through the crowd. That's our
guy. That's Doug Dimmadome.
A worthy
competitor. A proper scrap. It moves on. it's a worthy a worthy competitor a proper scrap
it moves on it's a final four final 14. fair play randy fair play
the juxtaposition
you're probably happy that's out it ain't going anywhere i got news buddy our final matchup of
the day gonna double down we got number three in the brunch
bracket brett owning land in west texas versus a number one seed of the brunch bracket the zah
card this is a this is a battle of titans right here this is easy for me the amount of calls i
get now when i'm doing the voicemails of people doing parody zahard questions. That's good.
It's alarming.
It's like a quarter of the calls.
I've got to chill.
Sometimes I don't like when people call in
and they just do like,
they rehash something from an episode that week.
I'm like, we kind of already did this
and stuff like that.
But doing fake Zocard questions
is one of my favorite things to do at this point.
It's part of the bit.
It's morphed into the character.
There's a certain character,
there's a certain guy who has a voice inflection
and a tone that's very, very easy to identify.
And I know within a split second,
like, oh, this is going Zockhart.
I have to go Zockhart on this.
I really enjoy the Zockhart.
The Zockhart is actively making me eat more pizza.
I don't think I was a once-a-week pizza guy.
Now I'm a once-a-week pizza guy because I'm like,
I haven't played my Zodkard this weekend.
You've got this Zodkard burning a hole in my body.
It's just straight up burning a hole.
I'll give Dave the onus here.
Oh.
I know you're going to go Zodkard.
I don't know if Dave is going to go Zodkard.
I want to get my vote in.
Brett owning land in West Texas, it's bringing me a lot of joy still.
It's so fun to me.
I love it.
It's just sitting there.
He's never been.
Son's just beating down on his land right now,
all four and a half acres of it.
Oof.
Oof.
On one hand, I've got – I do have kinfolk out around Pecos Way.
Okay.
On the other hand, Zaw Card has kind of revolutionized how people eat pizza.
Like, you just don't see that very often.
People are now – people are more conscious about their pizza intake some people are eating it more like will so people are eating it less like
somebody out there maybe you maybe your family i don't know dylan's dylan's eating a lot of pizza
lately i actually have questions of whether or not he's obeying zack hard rules well he's got he's
got a court date we'll settle settle that. Are you freaking serious?
It would reset Sunday.
Dude, every time I check
Find Friends on a weekend,
Dylan's at Home Sliced Pizza.
Every single time.
Every single time.
Not every single time.
Every single time.
Dylan lives at Home Sliced Pizza.
It's a good pizza.
Do they have a good martini there?
Yeah, they do. What are the glasses? Like classic martini there? Yeah, they do.
What are the glasses?
Like classic martini glasses?
They're not quite classic martini.
They're taller and deeper.
But they're still the same, similar shape.
Okay.
Yeah.
Just, you know.
This is like the first one that I'm nervous for.
Go ahead, Dave.
It's Zockard.
Yes.
Okay.
But I have to say, Brett owning land in West Texas is my favorite bit.
But if I'm going to be objective.
The hot team went down.
They had a great run.
Dude, they had a really good run.
You can't be mad about that. We a final four ladies and gentlemen our final four is brick merriman randy you
definitely gotta gotta zoom in
and then on the other side of the bracket we have doug dimadome wow versus the zocco doug demodome making a run
yeah you don't see that often good stuff double d very cool okay we'll be back with the final four
and championship round on monday monday is the final of bit madness but without further ado
Monday is the final of Bit Madness, but without further ado.
It's time to talk this weekend and fun presented by our friends over at Roback.
If you see us out at Match Play, you best believe we're going to have some Roback swag on.
We just got a new package in from them.
Whole squad re-upped on polos.
We got some QZs in the mix.
I might pop my ass into some Roback shorts for the tournament tomorrow.
I love these things. I love these things.
I love these things.
Got a text from my buddy Ryan today.
Can't wait to goose you in them.
Look at this.
Damn.
Oh, dude, he went off.
He went in an Azalea hoodie and a Roar hoodie.
Did he use Backer 20 for 20% off at checkout?
That was my question, and he said no because I've already used it for all my email addresses. So I just bought it with the full price.
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What I just did right there was micro-influence.
You did.
That's great, man.
No, you macro-influenced influenced him and then he is now micro
influencing that's yeah everyone you're welcome roback i um you're fucking welcome roback i hope
you like that i'll be a dell match play all day tomorrow look if you if you throw me a beer i'm
gonna drink it all right i'm i'm gonna i'm gonna power drink from please please if you see doren
out there throw a beer at him i'm gonna power drink from 10. Please, if you see Dorn out there, throw a beer at him. I'm going to power drink from 10 until, I don't know when I leave, 6.
Eight hours of power drinking.
Probably going to eat some Q.
Oh, yeah.
Who is the Q provider?
Is it Nicklewaith?
Hard to say.
Nicklewaith.
Literally.
Is that what you're saying?
I think it's Nicklewaith.
I don't know how to say it.
I can't make that noise.
Yeah.
I'm going off tomorrow. Nicklewaith. I'm going off tomorrow? Did you're saying? I think it's Mickle Thwaite. I don't know how to say it. I can't make that noise. I think it's Mickle Waite. Yeah, I'm going off tomorrow.
Mickle Thwaite.
I'm going off tomorrow?
Did you hear me?
Oh, did you get a pledge?
Hey, remember when Dylan missed that hole out from Shane Lowry or someone?
And then he saw him stretching at Lifetime.
You did see him stretching.
He saw the hole out.
You did see Shane Lowry stretching.
You did not see him hole out.
Yes, I did.
You did not see him hole out.
God, y'all are so annoying with that shit.
Did you bring that up to him when he was doing lunges?
Guess what?
I might go back Friday.
I might go back on Friday.
Probably will.
I got to see how my knees are going to feel.
Probably going to get into one again because I'm a bad boy.
Pre-Adville, Dave.
Pre.
The rest of the weekend, I don't have much, honestly.
My Saturday night's open.
Sunday, I got the homie.
I got the homie all day Saturday but not
he's going to
Austin FC game that night
so I won't have him
but yeah
I'm open
holla at your boy
if you see him in the streets
or
or throw me a beer
at Dell Match Play
because I'm going to
Teen Wolf it most likely
especially
throw a beer at Dylan if you're in a hospitality tent and you see him walking by most likely. Especially throw a beer at Dylan
if you're in a hospitality tent
and you see him walking by like two stories down.
Throw a beer directly at him.
I will drink it,
and then I will probably take the can
and smash it against my forehead.
It's going to be like Kevin
throwing bricks at Harry and Marv.
Yeah, they just watched it.
I'd rather you just...
They didn't even move.
But if you throw it to me, I will catch it.
Dude, Marv got like six bricks to the face.
Like the ultimate deer in headlights moment.
Dude, crazy how many bricks he took.
Like that would...
Your skull would be so bashed in
if you were taking that many bricks to the face
from that high of a building.
All you have to do is...
All I had to do was just move.
Just take a step forward.
And all Kevin had to do was just call the cops.
That's true.
But what did his parents do?
Beers at Delmatch Plate are not cheap.
So if you don't hand me one, I got to get it.
I have a similar weekend in that I will be at the Delmatch Plate tomorrow and Friday.
Do not buy me a beer.
If you want to buy me a Bev, maybe buy me like an El Dave or a vodka soda.
I can't be drinking beers.
You guys know I pee pee.
They have restrooms out there.
Yeah, they have great restrooms.
I just don't like having to go to them like every 45 minutes if I'm lucky.
Other than that, no major plans.
Kind of laying low.
Got a looming Taylor Swift show in a week or two.
So I'm just preparing for that
because i know i'll be doing a lot of standing three plus hours yeah you better you better
fucking start training i'm gonna just i'm gonna start standing i need to put my standing desk
together do you need to do you want to take off a few days after that just in case yeah i'm gonna
rearrange some stuff on the schedule okay just let us know if you're gonna be hung over from that for a few days after we'll do uh broken record here tomorrow dell match play it's gonna
be very fun i'm very excited it's my only day out there this week because i'm leaving town
i'm famously going to las vegas on friday morning for 24 hours and 24 hours only
for the heiress tour by taylor swift you familiar with her work dylan
yeah you've been a
critic of her show i love taylor being too long at 44 songs three hours no one no one needs 44
songs you'd see i love dylan's mentality right now 44 songs no give dylan give dylan some 23
minute uh dead songs that go up to three hours and give me give me 12 songs do them well and now
and then let's dip out it That is a quintessential Dylan take.
Dude, Dylan just 44 songs?
Dylan, do you realize that we saw a 23-minute song at the Dead Show last week?
Dude, 44 songs, Will?
That is nuts.
That's too long.
Honestly, I wish it was 60.
For what she's getting for these tickets, 44 is plenty.
Apparently, it's nonstop entertainment.
I'm hearing nothing but rave reviews.
Can't wait.
I'm very excited to go to Allegiant
Stadium where the Raiders play.
Yeah, that looks cool, man.
Dude, it's got to be one of the
nicest stadiums in the world, right?
SoFi is better.
Okay, I said one of the best
stadiums in the world. Well, SoFi is better.
One of? It could still be Well, SoFi is better. One of?
It could still be true.
SoFi is probably better.
All those Qatari stadiums for the World Cup are probably pretty nice,
despite the bodies. No, it does look cool.
You know I'm a big Vegas guy.
You know that about me.
I'm not.
I can't wait to leave already.
But I'm very excited for the show.
You should leave after the 40-second song.
Get a jump start on the crowd.
Honestly, I might as well show up halfway through,
because I don't know shit about her country catalog.
Start me at 1989 and let me run.
She's going all the way through her shit?
Every album.
Not chronological, right?
No, it's fairly
chronological based on the set list
that I saw, but there are some things that are a little
mixed up. She's wild for that.
It's the eras to her, dude. She's going through her
eras. Do you get it going through her eras right you
get it you're putting these you're putting this together yeah country era pop fucking new i've
never been to a show of this magnitude before a new shit have you guys have you guys done stadiums
for anything i don't love concerts but have you ever been to like this i didn't ask you if you
like concerts i asked have you ever been to a stadium show yes i've been to a stadium. I don't like concerts. I go to sports all the time, dude.
I saw Dave at Texas Stadium.
God damn it.
Dave Matthews?
You saw yourself?
I saw Dave at Texas Stadium before they tore it down.
Was Brett there?
He loves Dave.
I don't remember being there.
We were smoking a blunt in the car on the way.
Can I ask a dumb question?
Black and white?
What's Texas Stadium?
It's where the Cowboys used to play.
They had a hole in the roof so God could watch his team.
Is that really why they put a hole in the roof?
He'd be ashamed if he said that.
That's not why they put the hole in the roof, right?
No, I think it was just engineering failure.
Jerry just really enjoys putting inexplicable holes in the ceiling.
Yeah, there's a lot of issues.
Why does he do that?
I don't know.
He's a jackass, mostly.
Dude, and your boy on Saturday is going to absolutely wild out.
He's got a first birthday party to go to.
Can't wait.
Can't fucking wait.
Who's turning one, dog?
Hot Collins, little kid.
I saw his little kid the other day.
Cute-ass little kid, dog.
Well, his dad's Hot Collins.
Yeah, he's got really good-looking parents.
So congratulations to him for turning one can't wait hot colin uh cannot go to match play with us
upsetting it's upsetting news yeah i've got i'm having a i'm starting to question like
if people like me i've had a tough run of inviting people places lately and everyone's
just turning me down i could see people not liking you. Yeah, I can too. I can too. I can too. That's all we got
this week, boys. This is fun. It's a fun week of content. But seriously, tomorrow, we feel pretty
good about tomorrow's Patreon episode on listener voicemail. So if you have been thinking about
doing the two-week trial, tomorrow's probably a really good day to actually do it. Great episode.
Yeah. It's probably the most fun we've had doing an episode of voicemail ilk for a very long time.
Go check it out. Any closing thoughts?
Nah.
Bye.
Bye. you