Circling Back - Alternative Medicine for the Boys
Episode Date: February 9, 2022Back at it again with Elon Musk’s brain chip that makes me people do dirty things on command, a woman who was thrown off an American Airlines flight because of the nuts in first class, a PGA Tour pl...ayer who’s moved to Costa Rica to drink his own urine, and This Weekend in Fun. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Purchase a Circling Back Candle: www.vellabox.com/circling-back Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (15:10) ​​Elon Musk’s Neuralink 'Brain Chip' (27:20) American Airlines Nut Allergy (41:18) PGA Pro Drinking His Own Urine (58:00) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Vizzy: www.vizzyhardseltzer.com/washed Birddogs: www.birddogs.com (STEAM) Nutrafol: www.nutrafol.com (CIRCLING for $15 off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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All right, we're back.
Circling Back podcast presented by Vizzy Hart Seltzer,
the only Hart Seltzer with vitamin C and superfruit acerola. My name's Will DeFreeze to my left, David, that boy rough. I've got too many tabs open.
I'm over tabbed. We've got, we've got just too much content for these people today.
And I've got just 18 tabs open, which is a record. But what I really want to do with this podcast is talk about who got snubbed.
Were there any snubs that jumped out at you?
Only Addison Rae from He's All That.
That was my biggest one.
I thought her performance was just a beacon of light in an otherwise dim year of movies.
Did you guys, who in this room, one of you guys watched Don't Look Up?
Who did not?
I did not watch it.
It is not something I'm avoiding.
It's just not something I've gone headfirst into yet.
It was nominated for Best Picture.
Not surprising.
What picture did they use from the movie?
A picture of our future.
Wow.
Meta.
No, well, I did find it to be an entertaining movie.
I wasn't watching it and being like, dude, this is the one.
It might not be the one, David.
It did not lead in all nominations from what I saw.
In the movie that I did see led in nominations, I had never heard of it before.
Coda?
That's how these usually go for me.
Like, I said something to Dylan the other day about this.
Dylan Chivary, ladies and gentlemen.
Hello, everybody.
Very happy to be here.
Go ahead, Will.
I said something to you about the other day that like ever since streaming platforms started getting bigger,
the pandemic, when we're not going to movie theaters,
I feel like it's much more difficult to have a beat on what good movies are.
Like I don't know what the most popular movies have been this year.
We don't see box office numbers like we used to, I don't think.
We don't see box office numbers, period, for some of these. Mom, never go to the box office numbers like we used to i don't think we don't see box office numbers period for some of these mom never go to the box office dog yeah and like i kind of got i kind of got an
idea for the movies that my friends were going to being like the popular ones it's like oh yeah
they just went and saw this said it was awesome you don't get that anymore yeah i did see dune
and i did enjoy dune but at no point it was nominated for best, but at no point it was nominated for Best Picture, but at no point during it, I was like, yep,
getting the nom. Give him a nom.
A nommie. Isn't Dune
really old? No, Dune. Never mind.
I'm thinking of something else. Sorry. You're thinking
of the video game Doom? Doom 3D?
No, I'm not thinking of Doom. I was more of a Doom 2
guy. I used to play Doom.
Doom was one of the first computer games I ever
really got into. For me, Doom was a game
that I was not permitted to have on my computer, but I would immediately go to my friend's house and play it. Doom was kind of the first computer games I ever really got into. For me, Doom was a game that I was not permitted to have on my computer,
but I would immediately go to my friend's house and play it.
Doom was kind of sick.
It was sick.
I preferred Wolfenstein 3D, where you just killed Nazis.
Nazis?
That is also a movie reference you just made.
I'm looking at this list.
I'm not proud to admit that i've seen zero movies
uh on the top list for best picture that's not true you went and saw west side story in theaters
not a big west side story guy myself hey when's top gun coming out never i'm over that man
um actually supposed to come out like four years ago may 27th 2022 i was looking at
and i saw a little tea on some of the top gun stars what what'd they say you'll have to check
it out i don't even know how i didn't see any tea i made that up that's not true that's not
dude don't if you're gonna spill the tea make sure there's actual tea don't don't spill this fake ass tea no i didn't hit the gym later
and spill my tea you clearly do we've been talking about it testosterone someone has to
clean that up speaking of tabs open and no i'm not talking pornography but i've been have i have
the spreadsheet open for my bachelor party and i've just been roster baiting for the past several days.
The tab will remain open until March.
Is this kind of like when your fantasy
team has a bunch of guys projected in the
high 20 points and you're just like,
my projected numbers this week are sick.
I'll put up 170 this week. Easy.
I could not, minus
Klein, of course, who couldn't make it.
I couldn't have assembled a better squad.
Could include you guys, so take that as a compliment i mean i'm confident in my it's a good list i'm a good
member of any squad at this point okay dude vegas will is different dude the first time you went you
absolutely crushed it people are still talking about it i left that city in ashes never seen a tuesday like that before yeah dude Tuesday in Vegas with
your pregnant wife is the only way to do a baby they were calling you big to freezy yeah yeah
will defreeze the georgio
i think we're calling you i had to leave my lambos behind because i had a flight to catch
you just left them there yeah yeah I only took escalators in the airport
because my Gucci loafers deteriorate
with every single step
depreciate
that was pretty good
this guy is such a douche bag
it still shocks me
that that trip is like what three weeks away
I'm ready for it to be over where does the time go
i'm tired of emailing with stk i've never had a harder time booking a reservation let's make a
backup resi we have to we have to make a back domonico's or something we have to make a back
like you guys should just ball a little harder yeah no if they just said that like if if the if the concierge person that i've been emailing with just emailed me back and said you know you guys should just ball a little harder. Yeah. No, if they just said that, like if the concierge person that I've been emailing with just emailed me back and said, you know, you guys are – this is a small baller email chain.
I would immediately be like, all right, private room.
Raise the minimum.
Are you all small ballers?
Yeah.
Like damn.
Oh, I'm sorry.
We normally don't operate with small ballers.
Like a little kick in the ass from all uh well there's gonna be at least one person
who sits down and like just orders a water and like a beer because they ate earlier or something
it's like oh yeah i hit the uh i hit the mcdonald's this is the main event man people will be ready
for it but the good news will there are a million great steakhouses in that city good let's make a
backup yeah we need to make a backup you know know, my steakhouse story there. Of course you do. You got kicked out for dumping water all over it.
That was a different place. That was in Reno. Did you get the tomahawk? I sent a steak back. It's
the only time I've ever sent a steak back, I think in Vegas. Okay. So if you're going to send a steak
back, what are the, like, what is, what are the situations where you're allowed to send the steak
back versus when you're just being a diva? Pretty because it was a it was a regular steak it was a probably a ribeye or
something it wasn't a bone-in it wasn't special but it was very expensive because it was in las
vegas it was like a 90 steak you should not feel i don't know if you do but you should not feel bad
about it it was overcooked like it was i'm a medium rare guy the more you spend on a steak
that's the more comfortable you should feel sending it back.
If you're paying 40 plus bucks for a steak, that's the threshold.
I want to give this exactly as I prefer it.
And you can make that happen, man.
Unless it's completely raw, I won't send it back for being undercooked.
I'll eat an undercooked steak.
I don't care.
I don't like an undercooked steak.
I'll wash it down with my slonk easies.
I'm a medium boy now.
I'm not afraid to admit it.
Are there any restaurants in Las Vegas that don't cook your steaks?
You just want a raw steak?
Yeah.
I'm doing an experiment.
The Whole Foods there has a picnic table right out front.
I'll do it.
I'll eat one raw meal outside of Whole Foods.
If he's proven, if he's shown me anything, it's that like my entire life growing up just eating little little pieces of raw food like i could have easily just done
that for my entire life i was chopping up chicken remember that when i texted you and i said dude
this is a beating this recipe yeah i was chopping it up raw chicken and i was just thinking in my
head i really need to be that careful here yeah dude he's good he's normalized raw meat dude i
don't even i don't
even watch our cutting board ever anymore after i cut raw chicken i just lick it clean raw chicken
is by far the the most disgusting of the raw chicken is what he eats the least of and i i
respect that i want him to get kind of weird with this meat that he's experimenting with though like
some rabbit maybe yeah i don't know i'm sure there's a place where you could find that
is rabbit even good i want him to get into the the hunter-gatherer part of his um
trajectory no i want him to take down like a like a deer and then clean it and field dress
it himself and then just eat it raw isn't it kind of nice though that he's supporting these local
farms he's not getting all of it from Whole Foods.
Oh, he's not.
I'm just looking up steakhouses in Vegas right now.
Just make a reservation right now.
That's a good thing to do during the middle of the pod.
The top one I found was Outback.
Let's go.
But I don't think we're going to go there.
Let's go.
While Dylan makes a steakhouse...
Oh, go ahead, Dave.
Sorry.
No rules, just Dawn.
Bring back farms. Australian, go ahead, Dave. Sorry. No rules, just Dawn. Bring back forums.
Australian for forums.
So bad.
Hey.
Australian for frat.
A didgeridoo.
I'll show you a kangaroo.
A didgeridoo.
It's called a didgeridoo.
Idiot.
What are we going to do, man?
Something. Yesterday, we did dad pod circling dad not only did we answer several questions from uh parents prospective parents new parents alike
we also did a little tv dad draft i think i won it i think it's safe to say i won that shit
i think a lot of people probably i had a murderer's a row people privately texted me like wow i did
not see your draft going that way,
but I love what you did with it.
I received probably 38 emails from people being like, dude,
you absolutely crushed those guys.
I will say your draft was surprisingly good.
Yeah, it was surprisingly not shitty.
Compared to what you've done on other drafts.
You did have somewhat of like choosing Al Bundy first
definitely shows that
you're not playing a young man's game right now y'all gave me danny tanner in the fourth round
yeah that's i don't want to reveal too much that's all i'm gonna say no that's facts though
i would be a poser because i didn't watch full house i did i was dedicated oh did you not
not really oh man i know but like i still think i would have gone with uncle jesse if i had to
go with one of those two just because like he had that absolute dime on his arm, you know?
Dude, Danny Tanner was the dad of that household.
Yeah, but how sick was it that Uncle Jesse just played guitar in the attic?
Dude, family man.
Do you remember when Uncle Jesse, maybe I did watch it more than I'm giving myself credit for.
He invented the hairspray shield.
Yeah.
Kind of a sick idea.
You put hairspray in your face while you were doing it in your face, whatever.
It's kind sounded weird.
Have mercy.
Can you imagine in the 90s, you're an LA actor.
You're firing on all cylinders.
It's 90s LA, and you're just rolling around with Uncle Jesse on the weekend.
Stamos.
Dude, if you're rolling with Stamos in the 90s, you're untouchable.
That's a dangerous night.
Yeah.
It could be just you and him going to IHOP, and gonna get real dangerous oh you know he's got that weird belly button though
which is fine honestly it's it actually makes me happy that he has a weird belly button because
otherwise he'd be perfect you're right like i like that you know he does have a flaw you're right
i actually don't know this. Look it up, Dave.
What, John Stamos' belly button?
Yeah, show me the belly button.
Show me that double B.
Sounds like he might have gotten surgery on it.
Oh, that's good.
Pretty hard to say.
Oh, yeah, it's a little, okay.
It's an outie of sorts.
Belly buttons are crazy.
But still, he's hella sexy.
That is just straight facts. Next week, he's he's hella sexy. That is just that's straight facts.
Next week, we're going to do some more worst of stories in celebration of Valentine's Day. We'll be airing on, I guess, Tuesday.
Send in your worst of stories, worst of at watchmedia.com or go over to watch media.
Click on the logo for worst of and submit your stuff through that form.
Whether it's a first date story, I'd love some more dating stories or if it's just a bad weekend, whatever.
We've already got some stories coming in.'s gonna be a fun one patreon.com slash circling back podcast you think any of those stories will include someone who had to
sprint out of a bar to projectile vomit was it projectile be honest i had suppressed it to the
point where it wasn't totally projectile.
I'm picturing it as the vomit scene in Team America.
No, it wasn't like that.
In the back alley.
It wasn't like that.
You just kept going.
No, it was a pretty tame one.
Like it was just a single, it was a single, it was a one hitter throw up.
Okay.
Yeah.
So you could have conceivably come back from that.
Yeah, for sure.
I could know.
I definitely could have, but there was something,
I felt this weight of responsibility on me just thinking, you what i got a kid at home right now and if i if i don't go home after throwing up then i'm just trying to i'm trying to play a different
game at this point growing growing up means you realize that when you sprint out of a bar to throw
up then your night's over it's honestly i can't believe i'm saying this is one of the more
responsible things i've done in 2022.
But, you know, if you do that in Vegas, like, there's no going home.
No, I hope I puke in every bar in Vegas.
If you would have come back into the bar, it would have been like Roy Williams walking back into the locker room.
Chill out.
Or the Arkansas coach. Y'all didn't even know I threw up until I texted you, and I was like, hey, I'm in an Uber on my way home.
That's when we need you to come back in.
Did you see the Arkansas coach pop top after the end of the job?
I did, yeah.
That's a good move.
Does he have like a cast on?
He does.
That really added to it.
That kind of makes it better.
Like he doesn't even need to take his shirt off.
You know how he hurt his wrist, right?
Somebody tabletopped him a couple of his plays.
Really?
Yeah.
That's good.
That's a good gag.
Got him.
Let's holler at our friends over at Bird Dogs.
You guys are familiar with them.
Shorts, pants, joggers, everything.
They got the built-in underwear that's insanely comfortable.
You know it makes you look like you got all the cake in the world.
That's just honest.
That's just no capping, straight facts.
That's not even in the copy.
Like, I just see Dylan wearing his Bird Dogs.
I'm like, oh, yeah?
Okay.
My butt looks bodacious in those shorts.
I don't know why. I like swimming in them.
Oh, I know why.
Because they're mad comfortable.
I feel like Hilary Duff when I put them on.
Ooh.
In what way?
Just stupid caked up.
Just my dumpers popping.
Okay.
Honestly, I've been watching her new show
and like none of the guys on that show wear bird dogs.
It's the chugiest crew I've ever seen.
They're my happy hour pants. They're my my golf pants they're my discotheca pants there you go
they also stole lula's designer these things are perfect for doing literally anything beach
brunch golf pool working out whatever i'll say it they're my steakhouse pants they should have
just hired their designer instead of stealing their designer but they offered him a contract afterward him or her oh good said designer so the designer is being compensated correct oh great i'm
not at liberty to say okay go to birddogs.com enter promo code steam and they'll throw in a
free bird dogs whistle tip football remember those nerf vortex howler footballs that whistle when you
throw them the footballs you can literally throw a mile yeah we're talking about those ones it's a
must-have for any football season. That's birddogs.com
promo code STEAM and
boom, a free Bird Dogs whistle
tip football with your pair of Bird Dogs. You'll not
take these things off. We promise you.
Elon Musk is trying to make
people come on Q.
I don't like Q.
Really? I don't like the Q message boards
and all that. I think they've harmed this country, but I don't know
if I would do that.
That's a little weird.
Oh, David.
How many things does Elon Musk have his hands in at this point?
Okay, he's being somewhat wrong by headlines.
And to be fair, we would have absolutely back in the day made this the star of the show because it is very clickable.
This website is pure trash.
Dude, it's 90% of it i put in are you kidding so when i when i usually put links to everything everything we talk about
i usually put some reference links in the rundown and today with this one i actually made sure that
i put in a link that had the most pop-ups humanly possible it's the neural link i have an ad blocker
on this browser for this purpose exactly, and I still had like a million
ads pop up.
This is great.
I mean, they probably made 50 bucks off my one single click so far.
This says billionaire Elon Musk has two wildly ambitious goals to establish a permanent human
colony on Mars and to create a technology that links human brains with artificial intelligence.
Of Musk's two futuristic dreams, it's the second one that has most potential to change
humanity while most of the early publicity about neuralink the spacex entrepreneur's brain to
computer interface has focused on its personal or on its potential to unlock the lives of people
living with severe paralysis by allowing to control robotic arms and even one day entire
exoskeletons the technology would change the way for the rest of us to communicate learn and have sex which is when they're coming on cue this is happening yeah and our children's lifetime
this will be somewhat normal don't get me wrong in terms of you know people with disabilities
people who might need that help by all means thank you will make the chip happen hey do we
need to be coming on cue?
Okay, but more than one researcher has explored the idea of stimulating the brain's pleasure centers directly,
allowing people to do without drugs or alcohol to achieve pleasurable sensations.
Dr. Stuart Malloy developed a device in 2001, playfully dubbed the Orgasmatron.
You got to come up with a better name.
I don't know. It can't sound like the Trey Parker movie.
I think it's pretty straightforward,
and now I'm intrigued.
It sounds like a joke from Austin Powers.
The Orgasmatron.
I don't want to be able to just do that on demand.
One million orgasms.
I don't want to come on demand.
Well, here's a question.
It has nothing to do with coming.
Coming on command.
Would this type of technology, could it simulate drug use without you actually doing the drug?
Yes.
I say that emphatically.
Because I think that would be the way I might want to do it.
It's like, oh, wait, so we could see what it's like to be on a severe mushroom trip,
and then you can just turn it off real quick when you start freaking out.
That'd be kind of fun for a night.
Just drink coffee.
I guess you could just do that with like VR goggles, right?
But it just isn't,
it's not the same
when you don't have the possibility
of like, you know,
tweaking out
and not getting away from it.
Were y'all VR Troopers guys
or Power Ranger guys
or neither?
I was a Power Ranger guy
on the low,
but they had a bad reputation
around our school.
And so I didn't really like
saying that I was one
because then you would
get made fun of.
VR Troopers was such a knockoff.
I didn't mess with either of them.
VR Troopers was the Burger King of fighting masked futuristic people.
Dave, unfortunately, I have bad news for you.
I've never even heard of VR Troopers.
This is something I'm not familiar with.
Randy, have you?
Okay, Randy.
I guess I'll fuck off, Randy.
I'm Googling it right now.
If you want me to leave, I'll leave.
Wait, so these came after the Power Rangers.
Yeah, they were shit.
Yeah, this sucks.
No offense, Dave.
I'm sorry.
No, I wasn't into them.
Oh, okay.
Were you a Power Ranger guy?
Not really, but I was aware of them.
I was aware of their existence.
We had a couple kids in our class during that time period who were super into Power Rangers,
and they weren't exactly the most popular kids in class, and they always got dragged for liking the power rangers and being them for halloween and stuff
like that and i always just felt bad because i was like man i identify with you but like also
i'm trying to like be cool with my boys man you sold them out i did i did but like we're facebook
friends now it's cool are you guys facebook do you ever get drunk and like start thinking about
it and like open up a Facebook messenger
and like think about reaching out to like apologize for bullying them for being power
I never, I never did any of the bullying, David.
In fact, one of these, one of these people still reaches out to me via Facebook messenger
to this day.
Hey, love the pod.
Love what you guys are doing over there.
How do you guys make money?
But seriously though, i've got a
podcast idea yeah i'm sorry you guys should get donald trump on this chip could allow you to feel
what your partner's sexual pleasure feels like okay what does that mean i don't know what if
i'm hella mid in the sack i got news well she already knows that i think that'd be so depressing
if you were like i'm gonna find out how good i am and you're like oh this is this is my performance this guy stinks like that oh
what she sees pov what she feels
dylan you're what do you think i can see you like want one of these
you just don't want to admit it why does he want why does he want to set up a colony on mars so
badly i don't know it's not gonna happen once he want to set up a colony on Mars so badly? I don't know.
It's not going to happen.
He wants the human race to live on.
It's not going to happen.
After we ruin this planet.
Have you not seen Don't Look Up?
We'll never live on Mars.
Did he learn nothing from the Academy Award nominee?
I don't have the ambition that Elon Musk has to save humanity, obviously.
What's the point?
It's not going to happen.
It's not going to work. What's the point it's not gonna happen it's not gonna work
what's the point of saving humanity he's not gonna he's never he's never gonna live on mars
hey it's just not happening so what's the point somewhat elon musk related did y'all there's a i
don't know what that is you have a you have a woman holding a very large dildo on your screen
it's in the same article it's an article you literally linked to i know but like why is this
photo so big in the on this website i don't know because the daily star is trash that website it's an article you literally linked to i know but like why is this photo so big in the on this website i don't know because the daily star is trash that website it's the worst website in
america sorry that made you sound like you were doing something pervy like no dave is just catching
strays from a trash website um did y'all anybody happen to catch the documentary on the soccer team
that the thailand soccer team who were trapped in the caves for like 14 days or whatever it was
uh i watched the trailer well let me say first of all it's a great documentary and here's
the elon musk connection the guy who sued elon musk because elon musk called him a pedophile
um is in the movie that's not really a storyline but that is a thing that happened and i couldn't
i forgot musk sell him out like that el Elon wanted to send over some like submarine thing that he was going to build or already built.
And they were like, no, that doesn't work for this.
And they got into a back and forth.
And it ended with Elon just completely dragging that man's name by calling him that.
And I don't know what the outcome of that litigation was.
What was the name called based on? Was he actually one or just no i don't think so is it
just like kanye saying pete davidson has aids just to like you know stick it to him well no no no we
don't know if pete davidson doesn't we don't know well i assume he doesn't have aids yeah i think
he's just saying he looks kind of he-y. Just looks sickly? Yeah.
I think that was the dig there.
I don't know if we're doing AIDS-y.
Yeah, I don't think you're supposed to call people looking AIDS-y, but...
He looks sickly.
He does.
He does.
He looks like Elon Musk won that defamation case.
Just wanted to put that out there.
Oh, good.
Probably cost that guy a lot of money.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm sure it didn't throw a wrench in that guy's life for a significant period of time.
He said it was meant to be an insult, not a statement of fact, which, okay.
In my ranking of people that I want to call me a pedophile in the future, Elon Musk and other people that are the richest people in the world are very low on that list.
You don't want the most famous people in the world calling you a pedophile on Twitter.
But they've got the deepest pockets.
So if you are able to.
Yeah, but they probably have better lawyers than me. you could look at me subscribe to the i'll represent you okay you could subscribe
to the you know no publicity is bad publicity thing so if they're talking about you it can't
be the worst thing ever which just like the uh i'll tell you bad publicity when you're the uh
the island boys yeah that was bad publicity here's the thing like when you get your house rated
normally you don't want you know
a murder charge to get like unearthed best case scenario it's it's mtv with the camera crew and
they're raiding your room yeah well they grab you and they throw you on a bus and you just sit there
and you're like oh no they're gonna find my they're gonna find my nudie magazines are they
on the hook for aiding and abetting? I don't think so.
But maybe.
They're the Island Boys, man.
Look at you.
These guys don't know what's going on.
The brain's on Dorn.
I fucking need to see their courtroom fit.
Basically a lawyer, honestly.
Their courtroom fit?
I don't think they're going to have to.
Well, they may have to testify.
I don't know.
I just saw the headline, so I'm just talking out of my head. Wait, they're going to testify?
I'm talking out of my dumper.
They're going to show up in the spot looking to looking extra fly i'm just spitting that booty chatter
what you're not an island boy dude i'm the most island islandy island boy here what are you talking
what what makes you the most islandy island boy i got tan skin it's true it does look like you've
been sitting on a beach. That's right.
You're not wearing shorts right now.
Exactly.
You're putting on poser vibes.
I sip Mai Tais and shit.
What do you know?
I think I know what they do about a Mai Tai.
This guy went to Pool Burger yesterday.
What's in a Mai Tai?
I don't even know.
I had a ginger beer last night with my burger.
How do you guys feel about that?
The occasional ginger beer is fantastic.
They were like, here it is.
They sat on the table and I was like, you know what?
You give me a glass of that crushed ice over there, maybe a lime wedge.
Damn.
And suddenly your boy was just catching a vibe at Pool Burger.
Dude, you caught a serious wave there.
That's what's up.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was dope.
You know what?
I take it back.
You're the most island-y.
I don't know if I am.
I might be.
I will say this.
Unless I have a disability that's stopping me from doing things,
I don't think there's ever a time in my life where I'm going to be like,
you know what?
I'm going to get the Neuralink.
I just have no desire.
What if you don't have a choice?
Oh, that's a good question, Dave.
We are living in a black mirror thing.
We are living in a black mirror thing.
Wasn't it Elon who said this is all just a simulation anyway?
I've been having more and more simulation vibes lately from the world would part of the simulation be us recognizing
that we're in a simulation i feel like every time we talk about being in a simulation all all the
people that are doing the simulation are like okay we got we got to batten down the hatches right now
they're on to us simulation not living weird man we could be we'll never know no this is real shit how do you
know guys do you guys know man it freaked me out when elon said that we were possibly living in one
because i was like okay i did watch the matrix the other day this guy's smarter than i am he says
that was it terrible no the first matrix is fucking one of the best movies of 19 whatever between this the documentary is the series you're starting you
you have you're you're certified a binge boy uh yes it's true i i have been known to binge watch
shows now if you're not familiar with binging it's when you watch like multiple episodes
in a row because it's so good, you just can't stop.
That's TV Dave.
You got to watch Dope Sick next, dude.
Stop.
I'm tired of recommending this to you.
Stop recommending me shows where that character, TV Dave, will become a reoccurring guest and nobody wants that.
Dude, Michael Keaton?
Are you serious?
I do like Michael Keaton.
You ever dance the devil in the pale
moonlight i haven't he's by far it shows michael keaton by far the best batman ever i think some
people disagree with that you're a clooney guy i get it it's robert pattinson
our pat is definitely the goat batman's dc right randy so i won't see him in any of these marvel
yeah is that why they call's dc right randy so i won't see him in any of these marvel yeah is that why they
call you dc rough what are we doing now well you guys hear about this woman who got removed from
american airlines flight because of her nut allergy she's allergic to nuts is this another
daily star link no why are we just we're combing just the worst. Yeah. Yeah. Can I close this daily star?
If it lets you,
it might,
it might like glitch out your entire processor.
They already asked to enable cookies or whatever.
The only reason I find this story entertaining is because I just keep
imagining it being,
and I think you should leave skit where it says a woman with nut allergy
thrown off American airlines flight because flight attendants claim they are
contractually obliged
to serve hot mixed nuts in first and business class now how severe is this nut why does it
nut allergies can kill people yeah david but like if the person next to you is eating
nuts is that enough to like because we we talked about the Texas Roadhouse situation.
And if someone with an
allergy just stumbled into one and their lungs
just closed up. Make that reservation for Vegas.
Let's go to Roadhouse.
They do have a Rainforest Cafe in Las Vegas.
Just FYI. Why do they contractually
have to serve nuts?
I don't want the nuts.
I have to serve you the nuts.
This is such a weird where's the nuts
we actually have to give you the nuts have you ever had the hot nuts on a flight
no i've only had it once okay are they hot temperature wise or spicy wise temperature
wise they're warm they're warm nuts why are they what's i didn't know that was even an option uh i
i was i was blessed with taking a business class flight and it was the only time I've ever been served that.
What's the damage?
There it is.
What was the damage?
Would that set you back?
No comment.
You still paying it off?
No comment.
I'm pleading the fifth.
Hey, I'll just say it.
I'm a room temperature nut guy.
I don't know.
The hot nuts did taste pretty good.
But if you're one of the people that pays for that business or first class class thing and you see this lady throwing a fit about not doing the warm nuts
are you like no get her off the flight i want my warm nuts oh did she was she asking that no one
have the nuts that's what i assume so she said american airlines made me feel like my health and
safety uh and hold on made me feel like my health and safety and that others with severe food
allergies is not important i have no control over my nut allergy and the danger it prevents in my and hold on, made me feel like my health and safety and that others with severe food allergies
is not important. I have no control over my nut allergy and the danger it prevents in my life.
Like I assume she, other people were getting them. She might just have a really severe one.
You know, it actually, it's kind of surprising to me that I think some airlines don't do nuts
anymore on flights, but like you would think that everyone would kind of be headed that that
direction example parks at school like he can't bring like peanut products to school because kids
could he not bring a pb and j if the peanut butter is staple if the peanut butter is contained between
two pieces of bread with jelly on either side and you're just eating it yourself why can't you eat
that like just just make it. I don't know.
Did this many people always have nut allergies?
Has it skyrocketed?
It's the food sensitivity stuff in the last 20 years.
I've wondered that so many times.
Not one kid ever had any issue in our high school or middle school
or anything about nut allergies.
I've been told by sources it's the 5G towers.
They're just making everybody everybody go nut wild i
didn't even hear about nut allergies until like 10 years ago i think i have one friend who has
a nut allergy and i respect that but like that's the only person i've ever known who has a severe
nut allergy yeah i know people with seafood allergies and if i could if i couldn't eat nuts
i'd be in a bad mood all the time i love nuts man big nut guy i feel like i could do without
nuts randy mark that i do like nuts peanut butter almond butter peanut butter's true peanut butter
and almond butter would be the hard part for me but everything else like when i get candy and
there's nuts in it normally i don't need it oh yeah dylan you famously told us you eat peanut
butter every day i've had peanut butter already today me too in a smoothie same guess what didn't
fill me up i'm very i'm kind of borderline hangry and i had a little protein bar that had peanut butter already today. Me too. In a smoothie. Same. Guess what? It didn't fill me up.
I'm kind of borderline hangry.
And I had a little protein bar that had peanut butter in it.
What kind of protein bar?
Organe.
They're very good.
A little pricey.
Wow.
What was the damage on a box of those?
I don't remember.
Get them off Amazon.
So what happened? What's the outcome? I don't know. Get them off Amazon. So what happened?
What's the outcome?
I don't know.
She's like probably nothing.
Does she have to...
Somebody with a severe nut allergy,
they have to carry an EpiPen maybe?
You know the EpiPen that like...
They shoot your...
Put it in.
I used to have to carry one in my car for allergy shots.
There's a pin in your thigh.
I was always like dude would
i be able to do it jab it into my little tiny thigh this is before i had monster quads
what kind of quads dylan dreams about do you dream about quads i mean no i wish my quads were
thicker absolutely but i don't i don't dream about them no i've been having some
fucked up dreams lately tell us about it man oh man it's too much it's too much you ever have a
nut dream like wet dream no i could dream about nuts like don loves fucking nuts gross fucking
nuts i just like to eat them you said you couldn't live without them i just like to eat them. You said you couldn't live without them. I just like to eat them. Would you rather be allergic to nuts or seafood?
Shellfish.
Seafood, since I eat it so...
I don't eat it very, you know, regularly.
It's like a two times a month thing for me.
I'd choose nuts.
Me too.
I love nuts, man.
I think I eat both.
I mean, I'm not eating, like, good seafood all the time,
but, like, I probably...
I do love seafood.
I probably eat the same...
I probably have the same amount of
instances of eating nuts every week as opposed
to eating seafood every week. Not that many.
I'm not a big nut guy. I want to say scallops
for 15 days straight.
Why would you do that? Scallopalooza.
It was a pretty wild time in my life. Scally days?
I normally don't talk about it, but yeah.
They're calling me the Scallywag. Damn. Really?
Yeah. I didn't know you at that time of your life. They. They're calling me the Scallywag. Damn. Really? Yeah.
I didn't know you at that time of your life.
They used to call Dylan the Scally-schwag.
I was hospitalized for many weeks.
Iodine poisoning.
It is such a flex that Ari, Jeremy Piven, had to quit a play because he ate sushi too much.
That's the most like bougie la
shit i've ever heard wait he does plays yeah apparently apparently he so i didn't know this
until i started researching this headline and for some reason i just was thinking about a couple
weeks ago and i guess he grew up in a kind of a theatrical family and so his his actual roots
have to do with actual plays and stuff as opposed to television huh i'm more of a pcu guy did you ever see pcu no what's
that it's one of the all-time jeremy piven you've seen pcu you've seen it of course what's pc is
that stanford something david spade's in it i don't know what the politically correct university
it's like a 90s college movie.
Dude, is this like a frat movie?
Yeah, but not...
Yeah.
They didn't make their money back on this one.
Budget was 8 mil and a box office for about 4.3.
Yeah, but it's a real cult classic.
Cults love it.
Like Heaven's Gate cult?
No, like Hale-Bopp Comet cult. comic cult that's heaven's gate yeah i think that's
heaven's gate i was kind of i was kind of fucking with their vibe for a little bit but i was also
pretty young and i liked applesauce weren't they in the all whites they yeah they hit they hit them
yeah they hit them with the uh this all the same sneakers same johns right there sick you got to
get a squad that'll john up if your cult leader is like hey we're all eating applesauce you gotta eat the applesauce you can't be the one not eating applesauce
what are y'all talking about
we're re we're bringing the heavens gate cult back
that was kind of sick i was in california when they died i was really creeped out that's crazy
that could have been you but it was just weird seeing it on local news being like,
oh, this is a little too close.
Dude, the one where they all had the same tennis shoes on?
Mm-hmm.
Where have you been the last minute and a half?
He's reading about Neuralink.
I was reading.
He's putting his down payment down for a Neuralink.
He's reading about this woman's nut allergy.
Anyway.
Yeah, that was some weird-ass shit, man.
Yeah, we kind of covered it.
Yeah, whatever.
Dude, that's crazy. I've been to california as well
i never really thought of that and those people that happened there that's why yeah i'm gonna
post an instagram of me in california eight years ago i've also been to waco by the way do you
remember when notre dame burned down dude i won't tell me you were there dude i went to paris in
2004 dude you could that's not that far removed dude no you know how 9-11 happened in new york
city i went to new york city in like 2019 what it's crazy wow are we gonna get shit for this
oh well no we've done this but we've done this no and everyone makes fun of those people like
oh my god like i was just i studied abroad there and spent a long weekend there yeah guess guess who was there
people who actually died were there when it happened yeah how about we shut up how about
we focus on those people like here's a picture of me like doing a peace sign in front of like
if you look in the background you can see the twin towers it's way in the distance see them
yeah see i was close sick oh man my cousin lives there oh is your cousin okay yeah they actually don't live there
anymore living like a suburb but dude they could have been there
oh that's crazy i actually had driven by that place a week prior
fuck are you serious that's yeah it just makes you think damn i had i had nuts in first class
one time that could have been me first class dude i could have had i could have had an allergy i
could have died but you don't wait what to be clear you don't have the allergy right dude i
saw like a plane crash recently like i fly
we need to do the i fly wait i've seen you fly that's right
dude i saw a fender bender out there earlier today like dude i drive a car
those people have to make it about themselves what are they doing serious question what was
the outcome of this is she suing she's got no they she didn't she hasn't even contacted american airline she just did a tweet thread and complained about it
like contact them lady love a good tweet thread i i've enjoyed people using the thread emoji lately
for their tweet threads i don't know why it's very chewy took me a while to figure out what that was
worst school my school worst job of all time is a social media person for an airline. Dude, the people that respond to Southwest DMs and stuff, they have to hate their lives.
They have to.
And when people just air them out publicly.
Yeah.
No one's ever like, hey, Delta, thanks for the awesome flight today.
It's never that.
It's like, hey, why the hell are you canceling?
You really flew the shit out of our plane today.
You ruined my family's vacation.
We got there four minutes early.
I'm going to start publicly complimenting my airlines.
Like, wow, I had a very superior flight today at Southwest.
Thank you.
These pretzels were absolutely hitting today.
Thank you.
Yeah.
These nuts were bussing.
Dude, yeah.
No delays.
We got more mileage out of those two stories than I really thought.
Yeah, we did.
That was good.
Yeah.
A little worried.
Yeah.
You know what else you can get mileage out of?
You ever heard of this neutrophil stuff?
Some of you out there might be having some scalp issues, maybe some hair issues.
I don't know.
Maybe you have some visible scalp showing up a little bit.
I get worried about this all the time.
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I just turned 35. And as you know, a lot of men at the age of 35 it starts to decline a little bit dylan 35
is about when uh i started to notice my hair thinning a little bit up front well i got a
package in the mail recently and uh when i opened it my wife said what you got neutrophil she knew
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like all excited about it i was like yeah let's ride i had to hide mine because my wife was trying to steal i was like no no this
is d-man sally wants daddy to have some bye-bye what will said something or dylan said something
what'd you say sally wanted daddy to have thicker hair fact daddy in this scenario facts i'm a dad
yeah fritz was born in 420.
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Yeah?
How's it working out for you?
Wow, that's a big announcement.
I'm into it so far.
I'll say it.
I am also taking it.
Are you?
And let me tell you, I'm feeling pretty good about it.
I'm getting compliments on my hair.
I believe it.
I am too. And I like how it's projecting at this point.
It takes a few months before you really start to see results, though.
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Golf News.
Let's talk Morgan Hoffman.
You hear about this guy?
Should I have known more about him beforehand?
That's the question. I don't, I don't, I, I recognize the name. I do not remember him at all.
I recognize the name, but I think it was just one of those things that you just see on the
leaderboard and then you just keep, keep your eyes scrolling down. I think what most people
hear the name Hoffman, they think Charlie. Hell yeah. You have to. He's the man. His Thursday and Friday
days at Augusta are unparalleled.
Every major. And then moving day happens.
And he moves the wrong way.
He moves out. That's no
shot at Charlie. It kind of is.
It is, but there's a lot of
good players out there. That's what that head tilt he does
when he hits. You notice that?
No. Look for it.
He watches it like that this guy's in
a position to question people's swings like no it's not a swing it's his head tilt after he swings
he's watching it fly maybe he's pimping it just just look for it all right anyway morgan hoffman
you would know him from he was on the okie state ricky fowler squad so he was and he was very very
good he was a a beast a i think he was like and he was very, very good. He was a beast.
I think he was like number one amateur in the world at one time.
Oh yeah, the first line of the story.
Was a world number one amateur, so I think I'm safe in saying that.
But this story was sent to us no less than 25,000 times.
Because Morgan Hoffman is now living in Costa Rica.
Why is that significant?
Well, he was diagnosed with a type of muscular dystrophy.
Yes.
And it greatly affected, of course, his body.
But it slowed his swing down, and he kind of lost his edge on the golf course.
He was losing muscle mass.
And decided to do something about it and turn his back on Western medicine, Dave.
Something you're a big fan of.
We all are.
I'm just, you know.
Can I read some highlights from this story?
What?
Yes.
First and foremost,
he got his pilot's license,
which doesn't really have a lot of weight in this story,
but that's just dope,
and I wanted to make it...
He did that before. He would fly himself to tournaments. That's sweet. Like, objectively doesn't really have a lot of weight in this story, but that's just dope, and I wanted to make it. He did that before.
He would fly himself to tournaments.
That's sweet.
Like, objectively, if you're a professional golfer who flies,
didn't Arnie do that for a little bit?
He did.
Look at me.
Well, you read the article.
It's in the story.
Oh, it was?
Yeah.
It is a lengthy.
I kind of skipped ahead to the fun part.
It's a lengthy read.
Yeah, I knew Arnold Palmer did it because one of the dopest pictures ever taken is him with his bag on his arm walking away from a private
plane all-time flex uh next he embarked on a raw diet no processed foods nothing in a package
nothing cooked so he's doing a little raw meat experiment for himself not meat though right
no he i guess not no animal product that's just lame potential slonkers know if it's an animal byproduct which slonkers he's not he's not
in the slonk game davey okay i just i didn't know i said this earlier when i see raw diet i think
i immediately think to raw meat guy like oh this guy's just taking bites out of grass-fed
ribeyes and washing them down with some slonkers why did i
say slonkerouskies during a 17-day period hoffman ate only grapes roughly 800 a day this one he was
living in jupiter florida i love grapes i don't know if i could do 800 a day though the grapes
are a food as well deadly for dogs be careful it's toxic they're toxic one time uh randy ate a
raisin i called the vet's office i said said, hey, should I bring him in?
It was a Friday night.
They're like, oh, yeah, you better.
I brought him in, and literally the people working are like, he had one raisin?
He's like a 90-pound dog.
He's fine.
Yeah.
I was like, well, all right, well, I'll go fuck off.
I could eat 800 grapes a day.
That's a lot of grapes.
I don't get full-on grapes, dude.
Have you had the cotton candy grape?
Yeah. They're a nice mixing grape for me,
but I'm just a classic green grape boy.
I'm a red seedless.
That's my jam.
Really?
Fuck with them.
Heavy.
They also note in this that after missing six cuts in a row
at the beginning of 2018,
with his swing speed having dropped below 110,
I mean, that's kind of where I live.
That is definitely my playing field.
He decided to take a break from the game
and headed to the mountains of Nepal
where he spent 90 days living off the grid.
This is where he first encountered urine therapy,
an ancient treatment that can involve drinking one's urine,
rubbing it all over the body,
and of personal interest, the gums.
He's doing pee-pee gummies.
Look, I...
I just feel like you shouldn't drink your urine that's just how i
feel personally how do you feel about massaging it into your gums i feel pretty poor about that
as well this is weird but i feel worse rubbing it into my gums than i do just straight up drinking
if i had the choice of drinking it or rubbing it into my gums i'm drinking it every single time
because if i am already putting it in my mouth i may as well just i may as well give it a little chuggeroo this is a thing that
these types do did you guys ever drink these types who are you talking about people who like
go off to the jungle and live off the land and like don't like don't have cell phones and shit
and do ayahuasca you're painting them all with the drink their own piss brush but i said some of them not all of them some of these
types like to drink their peepee not your boy he's backtracking uh okay so the frustration so i it
took me there's a lot in this a lot like dylan said it's a very long article did it surprise
you that he had to go to so many doctors before he was correctly diagnosed with muscular dystrophy?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Again, we're not giving medical advice.
We're not doctors.
But, I mean, he went to many, many doctors around the country, like specialists, and no one knew what was up.
Because he said he lost his pec.
His pec muscle went away, which is very very scary especially if you're an athlete uh and then finally he got the diagnosis
and then he decided to go to costa rica keep drinking his piss well the piss drinking did
precede the ayahuasca he did do a 10-day urine cleanse no food no water just a cup of urine in
the morning and the evening no food no water just vibes and piss the worst 10-day urine cleanse. No food, no water, just a cup of urine in the morning and the evening. No food, no water, just vibes and piss.
The worst 10-day stretch imaginable.
Would you rather vibe out in Nepal or Costa Rica?
Costa Rica.
Costa Rica.
Costa Rica's cool, man.
I don't know. Nepal's kind of chill.
Nah, Costa Rica.
Dude, I don't know.
You haven't been to either one.
In Costa Rica, the next-door neighbor is a kung fu master from Spain
who rides around town in his robe on a horse with a sword on his hip and a joint in his mouth.
Quote, it's like his uniform, Hoffman says.
It's hilarious.
The Kung Fu master's property and the Hoffman's house are separated by a one kilometer driveway that runs straight uphill.
That might be my favorite part of the entire story so i underestimated how much of a retreat from normal society costa rican has become for for like people who i guess have the funds to do it
how much does it cost to like spend like a significant amount of time in costa rica
i think we might need to have i think we should set a date in like like the future
maybe two or three years from now where we all just take a month or two off
and we force ourselves to go do something
with no communication with one another.
Absolutely not.
Why?
I can't leave the grid.
Sabbatical me, daddy.
The grid makes me comfortable.
You're just a cog in the machine.
You would take the blue pill.
Yeah.
What's up with you?
You want to be in a simulation, don't you?
No, I don't want to be in a simulation.
I just like technology and food and air conditioning, stuff like that.
I don't know.
Soft.
People become soft.
That's true.
You can just do it at your house.
You don't have to leave.
You can just not talk to us for two months.
Lots of people are in this ayahuasca jam, though, man.
What if we finally convinced Dylan to go off the grid for two months, and then he came back on and saw that we had recorded two months lots of people are in this ayahuasca jam though man what if dylan got off what if we
finally convinced dylan to go off the grid for two months and then he came back on and saw that
we'd recorded two months worth of podcast behind his back the entire time he's so fucked up
would you guys sold out like would you guys do ayahuasca uh no the the duration's too long i
don't need like a 48 hour or 24 hour whatever it it is experience. Oh, that's a long, I like to get in, get out, be tactical.
Yeah.
It's like an all day thing.
Yeah.
I would have done it if I, if I would have had an opportunity to do it, that was a very
like easy opportunity.
Like everything's taken care of.
I know that it's legit, easy to do.
And I didn't have, and I was single at the time.
I think I would have entertained it.
But now that I have like a wife and a kid,
I don't think it makes sense for me.
It scares me.
There's no way I could ever do it.
What if you came back and you just didn't like your kid?
Yeah, it like rewires people's brains and shit.
They come out of it thinking completely differently about things.
Yeah, and honestly, I feel like I have my priorities
pretty in order at this point.
And I don't know if I need to shuffle the deck.
Like, I think I'm pretty good.
This dude's brain is fully optimized.
It's not fully optimized, but I'm just saying,
I don't think I need to throw a wrench in what's currently happening
because I'm kind of settled right now.
It's not for everybody.
I'm afraid of how I would come out of it, for sure.
Did you read about his ayahuasca experience?
I did.
Tell Daddy about it.
He saw visions.
The ceiling disappeared.
I could see all the stars.
It was the clearest thing ever.
Out of nowhere, this 40-foot butterfly, excuse me, this 40-foot geometric butterfly comes
up on my left side and under it flies a little moth.
They start feeding me this huge vine.
And in this see-through vine, you could see nature being pumped into me like gasoline
leaves, dirt, full trees, berries in my mouth.
Some energy forced me to open my mouth
and i could not close it for the life of me i tried for an hour and a half the moth pulls the
vine out of me and suddenly this huge elephant appears the elephant in the room that was pretty
good elephant the elephant squats down drops one of the biggest mondo dumps i've ever seen
what about the part where the the black stuff leaves his mouth
or he's like you get to that part the blacks no i didn't the black the black smoke started
pouring out of my mouth yeah jet black the shaman next to me said he saw it felt like
the disease was coming out of me yeah that didn't happen that
was the muscular dystrophy leaving his body symbolically maybe i don't know if that's how
it works but hey who am i to tell morgan hoffman what to do or what happened there's also a golf
course um i think it said 90 kilometers away from his residence where he practices. He wants to get back in the game.
So he has three starts this year, I think, that he can do,
and his injury exemption's up on the tour.
That's a lot of pressure, but it seems like he doesn't really care either way.
Apparently he was pretty good with his finances.
He's invested in the clothing brand Grayson um he's done quite well for himself
surprised they even dropped the bag on this pot honestly
are you sure they weren't on man outfitters you're thinking of grayers grayer yeah sorry dog
no not full i mean i'm pulling for the guy man. So you could never see yourself ever like, you know, let's say watched media 10 years from now.
Like we got bought out.
You know, we made a bunch of money that we can come to.
Like maybe you made some investments and you can kind of take some time off.
You wouldn't take time off and go try to like do a little of this like heady shit?
Absolutely not.
No, not with a kid.
I would like buy a house in the mountains and ski
and shit like that what if you could what if you could take what if you could take roads man with
you and you did like you did a summer somewhere where you just kind of like went off the grid for
the summer with the fam and you had a yoga journey every morning and you just try to eat food that
you were harvesting yourself i feel like that would be kind of fun for a little bit drink your
peepee it'd be it'd be a little like, do I have to drink pee pee?
You don't have to drink pee pee.
No,
I'll be honest.
If you told me that there,
there is a scenario where drinking pee pee,
if it gave you like,
let's say like,
I don't know.
It had some health benefit.
It was like really,
really dope.
Like helped you like put on muscle real quick or something or burn fat.
There's a scenario where I would consider drinking pee stop i'm not doing it i have no desire you'd be the pp
guy yeah once you drink piss just don't tell anybody about it i'm not telling y'all once you
drink your pee you're the pee drinker like dude dave's jacked like overnight once we find out that
you now now i know that if you start getting jacked out of nowhere
i'm gonna be like he started drinking his piss oh damn it dave's on that peepee shit right now
i'm just gonna assume all the jack dudes at lifetime are just drinking piss i do assume
they're all on on the juice next time i'm in the sauna with a bunch of dudes like rib dudes i'm
like so who's had their piss today you guys doing the pee pee-pee thing? You guys heard about this?
To be clear, he did not do it for muscle mass.
I don't really know what the...
It doesn't really get into the science, the thinking behind drinking pee.
Just some kind of Nepalese...
I think later in the article, whoever wrote it was talking about how there's no scientific evidence that drinking urine helps you in any way.
Sounds like that guy's a shill for big pharma.
Yeah.
Maybe.
He does hit our guy Morgan.
Big piss needs to get their guy out there talking.
The guy who interviewed him talked about how his gums were receding
because he dipped a bunch in high school, college, or whatever.
TFM.
And then Hoffman was like,
well, if you just swish pee-pee around in your mouth every day,
it'll fix that very quickly.
I'm going to need a little bit more than that to put the pee-pee in my mouth.
You got to think it won't.
You going to tell the Kung Fu master
who lives up the hill that?
I'm not going to tell him that.
I'm not going to trust the pee pee guy
on health advice.
Sorry.
Because he drinks his pee pee.
It sounds like you don't have the perspective
that he has.
I don't.
You're on the grid not drinking pee.
You are not the same. You're right right i drink water and beer and shit you drink shit
i drink i drink red heavy red wine i don't like this on his um the center that he's looking to
the wellness center he's looking to create, finance.
Upon arrival, guests will be stripped naked and buried from the neck down in the soil.
A literal reunion with the earth.
That's so stupid.
I don't want to be buried.
Is that really in the article?
Yeah.
You don't need to do that.
You don't need to bury your patrons alive.
I think I would rather do the ayahuasca than just be buried from the neck down for any
period of time.
Yeah.
If I'm doing that, I hope my son is on the beach doing it to me
and I don't have to pay someone
to do it.
I mean, the whole time
you're thinking, what did I pay for this?
Hold on, what? I can't fucking move.
It'd be kind of a cool story if he
got over his
disease and
made another run on the tour it would be great because
you'd have to hear uh like jim nance and nick faldo and those types like try to tell the story
and just to see what detail they go into if it's we talking we're talking i want to hear jim nance
be like he was drinking his own urine for a time. His pee-pee.
Jim Nance does not have the... Jim Nance is not saying pee-pee.
Yeah, he's too afraid to even touch that kind of thing.
What would he call urine?
Probably urine.
Urine.
Urine's a gross word.
It's not that bad.
It's a good story.
Read it.
Golf Digest. Shout out to potential big farmer shill
no i'm kidding dan rapaport it's good to see people doing real journalism out there
something you wouldn't know about no mr time over there mr time you said journalism's dead
let's see if my page on Time is still there.
It probably is.
Go ahead, Will.
Do your thing.
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It's stinky as Vizzy season, isn't it?
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Dylan, what are you doing this weekend?
First of all, my bio page on time.com is still active.
I kind of wish they would change my little bio, though, because it's still, well, it's from 2014.
Why don't you read it to us?
You're going to tease it.
Dylan Chivary is vice President of Media and a writer at
Grand X Inc. Whoa. An Austin, Texas
based media and apparel company
that publishes TotalFratMove.com
and TotalSororityMove.com.
No mention of PGP, by the way.
Yeah, what the hell? Anyway,
still there.
I'm happy that... And it links your Twitter
account to at Roger J. Dorn.
Does it really? Yeah. Sorry. And it links your Twitter account to at Roger J. Dorn. Does it really?
Yeah.
Sorry.
And it says this account doesn't exist.
That's funny.
Bring back the Dorn.
I don't know.
What are you doing this weekend, dude?
Oh, yeah.
All right.
So here it is.
Check it out.
Friday.
A little date in Iowa Bay.
We don't have any plans yet, but we do know we're going to step out and do something of note.
Yeah, don't know yet.
Friday, birthday brunch for one of Bay's friends.
Must be nice.
Yeah, it should be a fun time.
Happy birthday to Laura, her friend.
Saturday night.
There's no way she listens to this.
No, she hates us. There's no way. Saturday night, however, I'm listens to this no no she hates us there's no way saturday
night however i'm going to this like ball thing i'm about to put on uh i'm gonna suit and boot up
like a gala it is a gala yeah it's a gala it's at the jw marriott
i don't exactly know what those tickets are. What those tickets are on you. Yeah. What's the damage on that?
$0 and 0 cents.
It was free 99.
So can I go for free 99?
I think you have to be invited.
Can I sign up?
You have to be a real estate professional.
I'll just wait in line at Will Call.
Okay.
Dude, Will Call sucks.
Can you just get me in? Will Call sucks.
Just sneak me in.
I'll just wear my tux. I don't know if I have the kind of pool there just get me in like just sneak me in i'll just wear my tux i
don't know if i have the kind of pool there to get people in in the door i don't know what a little
stuff you've just been showing up to i don't think why are you why are you inviting dave and i to
your galas anymore i was i was the one invited buddy you know bae she does these fancy events
and i just gotta tag along and try to hold a conversation with people.
Are you tired of being arm candy?
A little bit, yeah.
Get it?
I am arm candy, huh?
What are you doing Sunday, though?
Some of her friends will be there, which are great people.
Sunday, guess what?
Actually, on Friday, my new TV gets delivered, Friday morning, which I purchased yesterday.
Are you going to pay a professional who knows what they're doing?
No.
Are you going to have me come over again? i'm i'm breaking in again but i will
have someone help me hang it this time will i might need your help okay i told you i would
help you last time and then you got too antsy and had your son do it who can't hold the tv
yeah he's he weighs 42 pounds so he wasn't able to do it uh super bowl party. Dylan's house. Super Bowl.
Playing squares.
Big game.
Watching the big game.
Smoking squares.
Smoking cigarettes.
Should be a fun time.
Smoke with cigarettes.
Smoke them if you got them.
I've always said that.
What are you going to prepare?
What kind of meals are you going to cook for us?
I don't know, actually.
I need to prepare. Are you going to order pizzas for how many adults? Yeah. prepare what kind of meals are you gonna cook for us i don't know actually you're gonna let me i
need to prepare are you gonna order pizzas for how many adults yeah i need to know prepare like
how many slices i'm gonna eat i don't know what we're gonna do okay might throw something on the
grill yeah just order something yeah you'll probably botch that okay that's pretty rude
you should actually you should get something from like a good barbecue place and just claim it as your own.
Why don't you just...
Don't do anything special for us, but I think it'd be nice of you to do a Wagyu brisket
that you start at 1 a.m.
You want me to do a Wagyu brisket?
Yeah.
I don't think...
You don't have to go above and beyond for us, but I think that's appropriate.
I should get up at 1 a.m. and start it?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, slow roast that thing.
I will definitely consider that.
Okay.
You can spit roast it too. You guys uh yeah i'm pretty excited actually i kind of wish there's
a menu but yeah i'm excited my bring a bring a dope side dish what's up what's up with the super
bowl being at 5 30 isn't it usually like a little bit earlier it is every year because like not
gonna lie having a kid kind of kind of yeah stops you from really uh that conversation last night
yeah it's kind of hard to dive into a Super Bowl party, I've realized.
Alyssa was like, oh, we're going to have to leave at halftime.
And I was like, what?
I might get twisted that night.
Y'all just better watch out.
Dude, they should make the Monday after the Super Bowl a national fucking holiday.
It is not a WASH Media holiday.
Because I'm just drinking so much beer.
And it's like, how am I supposed to not get super fucked up on Super Bowl Sunday?
I want to let loose.
Yeah.
Like, it should just be a national holiday at this point.
Dude, we should do a thing.
We should do a thing where we like put out like a note
that like people can send to their bosses that's like,
hey.
Did somebody do that?
Washed Media approves that you get to skip work today
because the Super Bowl last night was simply too crazy.
I mean, it's at 5.30.
It gives people plenty of time.
Y'all excited?
Who are you cheering for?
It's quite a weekend.
I don't have a horse in this room.
Who are you cheering for?
You know what?
I'll be a Matty Stafford guy.
I'll go Rams with you.
I do love Burrow, man.
I haven't gone on record saying who I'm going with.
Burrow's got that swag that Stafford could never.
What's that boy getting into?
I've got a dinner Friday night.
Saturday night I have UFC 271.
You skipped right past that dinner.
What's your dinner plan?
Do you have a date on Friday night?
Are you doing a group, Denzies?
Did you hop on Grouper?
I didn't get a text from Dave.
It is with my wife.
Saturday night, we've got UFC 271.
We've got Israel Adesanya, Robert Whitaker, the rematch.
We've got Derek Lewis. His balls were hot.
You'll know him from that.
Versus Taya Tuivasa.
It's going to be just a bomb.
Somebody's getting knocked out.
Somebody's getting knocked out.
Damn.
And many, many more fights.
Mama said knock you out.
Call him a Matt's Martini.
Somebody wants to hit me with a tea time Saturday or Sunday.
Hell, even, I don't know, Friday, we've got a thing.
Hey, we're in a beautiful weather situation.
I know.
We're living right now.
I think about it.
We're living right now.
Yep.
But, yeah, tomorrow night, Thursday night,
we have our final live stream of the season.
Only on Washed Media YouTube.
Sunday?
Sunday's the big game, as Dylan mentioned.
But I'm looking forward to a day full of eating apps, making bets, drinking piss,
watching football, just having a good time.
Love it.
Band-Aid.
I think Rhodes is going to wear his little onesie that has a football on it.
Oh, sick.
So people know what he's all about.
Who got him the Luca
onesie at his birthday
because he's wearing it
today.
Not me.
It wasn't either of y'all.
Not me.
That's right.
He's wearing the sweatpants
again.
He's running them back.
It was a good gift from
your boy.
They look very comfy.
Yeah, that's why I got it.
I wanted him to live
comfortably and be a
hockey guy at the same
time.
What are you doing?
Not much else.
Friday night, I'm babysitting my nieces.
You guys want me to expand on that?
Dude, that sounds sick, man.
Yeah.
It's always good to spend your free time babysitting.
Is it just you?
Or is your family going to be there?
My wife will be there.
My wife.
We didn't even talk about the fact that your entire
family did walk in i don't know what happened there with dog rosie fritz rosie was in here
yeah wait what what i miss did you not see me sally walked in in the middle of this podcast
i didn't see anything yeah she walked in with fritz i didn't even see rosie in here
that's how good much of a good girl she is you Did you steal a girl's car cookies? Why'd she come in here? I don't know.
Not sure.
So yeah, I'm doing that Friday night.
Obviously, I'm not getting paid for that.
So obviously, it wasn't me who was like, yeah, let's do it.
I was kind of hoping to mob with the boys again.
I was hoping to have a dangerous Friday again.
That's not happening.
Can we just get dangerous at least once a month?
Maybe.
And then Saturday, I think I might,
I need to finish this Ozark series.
So I think I might just knock some of that out mid-afternoon.
I might binge it.
Yeah, I've been trying to binge it.
Okay.
But I actually have a double date
Saturday night
going out with one of Sally's work friends
and her husband.
Can't wait for it.
Very excited.
What do you think the damage is going to be
when y'all...
I don't know.
I actually don't know where we're going yet.
So it's damaged TBD.
And then from there, yeah, Sunday is just, gonna be living it's gonna be super bowl sunday baby
we're going all in i'm gonna show up wearing sports shit hey bring cash man okay i'll bring
cash and then uh yeah i'm gonna win i'm gonna take all the money on the squares you better
better best believe that uh and from yeah i don't really have i don't really have much
ambition this weekend if it's nice I might take the kayak out.
Made in voyage.
Haven't done it yet.
It's been too cold.
You haven't done it yet?
Dude, it's been fucking freezing.
Throw a jacket on, bitch.
Sorry.
I didn't mean to get into that.
What if I capsize?
And I'm all cold and I get hypothermia.
You know how to swim.
What if I freeze in the middle of Lake Austin?
You're in Texas.
Are you worried about getting sucked through the dam?
No.
No. It's just been cold. So you're in Texas. Are you worried about getting sucked through the dam? No, no.
It's just been cold.
I just don't feel like going out for the first time and being freezing cold.
Weren't you saying there was a story where the dam's getting sued by Nike for their just suck it slogan?
Yeah, I think that was it.
Oh, man.
I don't know. I hope to not be hungover very much this weekend after the dangerous night gave us one of those little nice hangovers that I hadn't experienced in a while last weekend.
Who's most liable on Sunday to let it rip a little too much?
Dave.
I rarely drink on Sunday.
I'm going to let it rip.
Hey, what is elevated cocktail attire?
Wow.
I don't know.
What does that mean?
Hopefully it's something that i don't have to participate
in well i i am on saturday yeah i think that's like sport nice jeans and a sport coat and a
button down i think it's based i don't know so you're asking me i drink beers alone comfortable
formal i'm looking it up right now elevated cocktail attire yeah Yeah, I don't know, man. Come down to Claire.
Look it up, dog.
So I'm looking at the scale of formality, okay?
This is something that you don't get this on other podcasts talking about this.
Gentleman's Gazette.
It sounds like an Instagram account that posts photos of chicks.
It sounds like a subreddit I don't want to be involved in.
I'm going to buy a blazer Friday.
I'm going to blazer watch.
Okay, so you start off with casual, and then you go into smart casual which is pretty dressed down still then
you have business casual which is you know something you'd expect button down then you
have cocktail attire and business attire which is suit and tie then you have stroller suit which
makes you look like you're about to like no go drive cinderella's chariot somewhere this this
is not this is not a thing we should reference. No, I think this is.
Because this is elevated version.
Cocktail attire makes it look like you're about to walk into a really boring business meeting.
Elevated cocktail attire scares me.
Cocktail attire, elevated cocktail might be a suit, no tie.
Okay.
Maybe.
I don't know.
No.
I don't know, man.
I think you need to wear a tie.
For cocktail attire?
Elevated cocktail attire, David.
Shoot.
Why not just...
Wait, why don't you just ask your fiance?
Yeah.
Because I found out about this while I was recording with you guys.
That's why.
Elevation.
No tie.
You're going to dress like a fucking dickhead, aren't you?
Yeah.
Slick back hair.
Wear an RG shirt.
I still have the snowmobile one.
Slot or spike hair.
Little bitty jeans.
Chicken spaghetti from Chickalini's.
White bathing suits.
White bathing suits.
White Lamborghini or Ferrari.
Yeah, I don't know.
But whatever.
Will didn't even get to the part of that graphic he was referencing
where the last two things, the guys were wearing top hats.
Yeah.
Look, I'm going to hit him with a top hat.
Dude, hit that top hat button.
Please do.
Dave, can I borrow yours?
Yeah, can you ask the chimney sweep guy if we can borrow his top hat
for Dylan's gala?
You think the one at Nordy that you didn't buy is still available?
I can go cop?
That was not a top hat.
It's like a miniature top hat.
Mini top?
Let's get out of here, man.
Fine.
Bye. you