Circling Back - Armpit Botox & Loose Meat
Episode Date: November 15, 2023Will got armpit botox, a lady in Mississippi crashed too many weddings, Sydney Sweeny’s phone and White Lotus S3, the Taylor Swift Cruise, Twitter features that kind of suck, This Weekend in Fun, an...d more. Enjoy a free two-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/circlingback Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (15:15) Dillon has a minor Twitter gripe (17:15) Will Just Got Armpit Botox (32:30) Wedding Crasher Lady (48:38) Sydney Sweeney’s Android (59:45) Taylor Swift Cruise (1:10:10) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Masterclass: www.masterclass.com/circling (2-for-1 annual memberships!) Schedule35: www.schedule35.co (STEAM for 15% off) Earlybird CBD: www.earlybirdcbd.com (BACKER for 20% off) PrizePicks: www.prizepicks.com/steam (use code steam for a first deposit match up to $100!) EarnIn: Download in the App Store! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from aust, Texas. My name is Will DeFreeze, and yes, my voice is back.
Sitting next to me in the stew, David, Mr. Navy Rough.
Color.
I'm very navied out today, aren't I?
Yeah.
Yeah, I really get that.
I'm actually very rowbacked out.
I freak with it, though.
Backer 20. Also, Wilmot's pole is still out. I freak with it, though. Backer 20.
Also, Wilmot's Polo is still available.
Rollback.
Check it out.
Backer 20.
Shit.
I saw a Tesla truck on my way in today.
Did you?
No, no, no, no.
I haven't seen one yet. These things fucking suck.
I saw one.
And before I realized what it was, I was just like, that's fucking stupid.
They're so dumb.
They're so ugly.
That's a silly vehicle
they don't seem like they don't even have like actual airbags in them have you seen that have
you guys gone down the tiktok algorithm that shows how fault like how terribly made they are
yeah i have seen that i've also seen a picture of a bicycle in the bed of the truck and it don't
even fit like the front wheels sticking out of the bed dude no offense to anyone that bought them but like if you
bought one you're an idiot they're so gross they look shivery yeah man uh they're gross i just want
to continue just dragging the tesla cyber truck whatever the hell they're called what a what a
shit vehicle you know it's not a shit vehicle? That's an electric truck. It's Rivians.
What's up with these things?
I'm an Alfa Romeo guy.
I know, but what's up with these Rivians?
They're cool.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
They're cool.
I've seen them.
I don't think Alfa Romeo makes any trucks,
so I think I'm in the clear talking about the Riv.
Glaring lack of pumpkin spice creamer in my coffee,
and it doesn't quite hit the same.
I didn't bring you any today?
No. Why didn't you? The gift of creamer in my coffee and it doesn't quite hit the same i didn't bring you any today no why didn't you the gift of creamer ah my bad i feel like let me know i feel like the world needs to collectively stop doing pumpkin spice stuff after uh halloween and then you're allowed to
pick it back up for thanksgiving week and have like pumpkin pie, stuff like that. It's an October, November play.
But people start doing it in September.
And so by the time we get to November, I'm over it now.
We have employees already putting up Christmas trees.
Not me.
One of the questions I got for the newsletter that we released last Friday,
check it out, Washed Weekly, was when is eggnog season?
And I decided it was the month of December only.
Which I think is perfect. Why?
Because it's a holiday
drink as much as it is a seasonal drink.
Okay. I think it goes into January.
I think it plays around New Year's.
I just, but you're famously,
you're okay with people putting their shit up
before December
for Christmas, and that's holiday decor.
Because –
Not seasonal decor.
It's not a Thanksgiving drink.
It's a Christmas drink.
You don't have to celebrate Christmas to enjoy eggnog.
I know, but my stance is that Christmas decorations aren't Thanksgiving either, but everyone does that before, and it pisses – I really don't like it.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
I do like it a little bit.
I think the perfect time to put up your tree is the day after Thanksgiving.
Great.
But I'm not going to get mad at you if you do it November 10th.
I actually think the perfect day is not the day after Thanksgiving.
I actually think it's the Saturday after Thanksgiving.
Okay.
Ah, man.
I'm not going to be at home.
I'm going to be out with the boys.
Mobbing?
Bussing?
It's clearly Saturday. We don't say mobbing anymore. That came and went real fast. I say out with the boys. Mobbing? Bussing? It's clearly Saturday.
We don't say mobbing anymore.
That came and went real fast.
I say it with my friends.
Just kidding.
You can't make a joke of that when you actually don't hang out with me.
You were actually texting me.
I need you guys to understand that I don't really do much.
You go to concerts all the time.
The boys that I hang out with are currently six weeks old and two and a half years old.
There's probably, yeah, if you look at the chart, right around the time of kids, the mobbing.
You got kids here training one way, and then you got mobbing and bussing for that matter.
I also don't want to hear any slander about this concert I went to last weekend.
As I made it clear to everyone in the office that to hear any slander about this concert I went to last weekend as I made it clear
to everyone in the office
that there was an open invite
to this concert
and it was a relatively
inexpensive concert
to go see
at ACL
Moody Theater Live.
Oh, yeah.
It was an open invite, Dylan.
I was catching
Fortnite dubs.
So are you a Fortnite guy?
I played it once.
Is it good?
I played it last night.
I got 10 kills.
Is the gameplay similar to that of what you guys played all through the worldwide global pandemic?
It's similar.
Yeah.
Which is how we're able to pick it up.
I'm going to switch.
Oh, here we go.
I'm going to switch from the Switch to the Xbox for the next time I play.
Just because.
Wait a minute.
You can play Fortnite on Switch?
I didn't know that. That changes things for me did not know online even famously have both hooked up to my tv right now my i have an eight-year-old son in the house so
is that why uh when i went over to your place you had uh something in your hdmi3
i don't want to talk about that okay oh i just Googled how much PS5s were. How much are they?
I wish consoles were still $300.
They're ranging
from $470 to $500.
I'm still rocking
that PS4.
I am too.
I am too.
I do think that
December this year,
I think there will be
a PS5 acquisition
for the DeFries household
that's going to...
Dude.
I'm going to say
it's for my son
for Christmas,
but I'm absolutely
not letting him
unwrap that
because I don't want
him to see it and I will not let him play it until he's not letting him unwrap that because I don't want him to see it,
and I will not let him play it until he's like Parks' age.
Just get you a bad bish to buy you one.
Seems like a pretty easy fix there, you know?
I bought my PS4 the day after I proposed to Sally
because what's she going to do, tell me not to?
Nah, she can't do that, son.
No, you can pretty much buy whatever you want.
Exactly.
I was like, you have a really expensive ring on your hand now,
and I'm getting a PS4.
That rock on that finger gives you a lot of leeway.
She did not want to be in Target that day.
After I proposed, I bought a trampoline.
Really?
There's nothing you can do about it.
I bought one of those air-compressed pogo sticks.
You know, those ones that launch you?
Yeah.
Really dangerous, turns out.
Yeah, I didn't weigh enough for mine.
I had to take it back.
Well, you were like seven. I was, turns out. Yeah, I didn't weigh enough for mine. I had to take it back. Well, you were like seven.
I was a smaller child.
Didn't they used to call you the pogo stick back in the day?
Yeah.
I was just sticking it everywhere.
Like the pogo.
They used to call me the bogo stick because I exclusively found bogo deals.
That's all I would do.
Really?
Yep.
What if you needed to buy like you know milk and bread
looks like we're not eating milk and bread okay wow looks like we're eating a buy one get one free
uh canned chili it's that sick though yeah you gotta find deals dylan yeah oh you know what i
haven't had since i since i've retired from being pescatarian let's hear it sloppy joe
I haven't had since I've retired from being pescatarian.
Let's hear it.
Sloppy Joe.
Manwich.
It's been a hot minute since I've had a Sloppy Joe. Have you ever had a Sloppy Joe you don't like?
No, they're incredible.
They're perfect.
Whoever came up with the recipe for Sloppy Joe,
I assume his name is Joe,
Joe crushed it.
Yeah.
I don't know what spices are in there.
I'm surprised that Sloppy Joe seasoning
isn't more prevalent in other places in life. They are really tasty like why aren't there ruffles that are sloppy joe flavored
some attribute the original sloppy joe to a cafe in sioux city iowa randy's got something but just
with all the ridiculous potato chip flavors that is a good point they like dude sloppy joe ruffles
would go really hard there's definitely like hamburger flavored potato chips out there
dave what are, what are the spices
within a sloppy Joe?
I'm going to read exact...
I don't like how they worded this.
Many years ago in 1930,
a cook named Joe
added tomato sauce
to his loose meat sandwiches.
We're not doing loose meat.
That's what they used here
in this Blue Apron whatever.
Their competitor, huh? Loose meat. And what they used here in this uh blue apron whatever their competitor huh loose meat uh and then it says here what's that viola a new between the bread offering old school and
the sandwich's official name we never called it a man which but i like man well i think technically
man which is are different than sloppy joes, right?
I think there's a slight difference.
What's a manwich?
Okay, this says-
Can women eat them?
I thought manwich was just a brand of sloppy joes.
Yeah, it's like calling it a Frisbee versus a disc.
Dylan, women are famously equal to men, so they can do whatever they want.
That's the point I was trying to make.
I think they're typically better than men, actually. So I'll one up you there all right are you ready are you ready for the the stuff that's
in sloppy joe's brown sugar minced onion smoked paprika but regular paprika works too dylan
little cumin little cumin garlic powder salt and pepper and then you mix that with ground beef
tomato sauce water mustard and mustard, and cider vinegar.
Damn, Joe was in his bag that day.
They probably crowd served Joe out of that restaurant.
In Sioux City, Iowa in 1930.
Who made this?
They're like, Joe, did you do this?
Joe is nice with it.
And they just surfed him out.
They weren't talking like that, though.
How did they talk in Sioux City, Iowa in 1930?
Go ahead.
I don't know.
They probably did do the gangster voice.
Now I think about it.
They had some real hitters out there in Iowa in the 30s.
Did they?
I don't know.
I don't know much about 1930s Iowa.
This is a sloppy one.
Not scoring a lot of points, that's for sure, out in Iowa.
You seen this offense?
You talking about state or?
Yeah, I'm talking about the Hawkeyes.
Oh, hey.
I'll get better as the show goes on.
I have a quick gripe about Twitter, if I may.
Save it. Okay. You still getting served? Put in the rundown Twitter, if I may. Save it.
You're still getting served.
Put it in the rundown for after what I'm about to do.
Is it Steam?
I don't know if you're ready for this, Dylan, but once we hit the 10-minute mark, it's time
for Will's five-star review of the week.
This one's a good one.
We only read five-star reviews on this podcast, unfortunately, for the people out there who
might have left a four-star review this week.
You guys ready for today's five-star review?
I think Dylan is going to like it.
Ooh.
This is from awesome56852578324587267.
Was the next number up just taken?
Yeah.
This is from November 7th, 2023 it says can dylan please
stop dylan is getting way too hot oh my wife has been dipping into the wash universe lately via
sunday scary shots to will and i'm scared of the day that she discovers dylan please please
that she discovers, Dylan, please, please don't steal my girl.
Ma'am.
That's if the wife listens to this.
Thank you for the compliment.
I don't know how to stop getting hotter.
I don't think I am personally, but if you think that,
if you feel that way, it's whatever.
I appreciate it.
Are you bailing on the clean shave face?
I don't know what I'm going to do, Dave.
So I took it all the way down.
Now I'm going to see how it looks at every stage all the way up to as much as I can grow it just to get the full, you know, gamut of possibilities here.
Have you ruled out mustache?
No.
Okay.
That's very much in play.
Okay.
Okay.
Because like, I'm not just doing this.
It's not a bit.
I really enjoyed when you just had a mustache.
I thought it played really well for you. You have a
jawline that carries the mustache very
well. You guys both do, honestly.
The compliments I've gotten on my jawline since
taking it down has really made me want to
expose it more.
The jawline. Your loose meat?
Yeah.
The stache is very much in play. Your manwich?
Very much in play. We'll see maybe for uh saturday i'll show
up with the with the stash i got it i got some work to do though by saturday hey can you do can
you do the sound drop for a new sponsor alert we have a new sponsor new sponsor alert hey do you
guys have um do you guys have any i don't know hobbies that you're currently doing anything you
want to get into?
That's just a general question.
I'm not asking for specifics.
Yes, yes.
But how do you feel on the hobby train right now?
I feel like I could have more hobbies in the mix, yeah.
What if I told you that you could do a little master class and you could learn yourself up on some interests that you're interested in?
What if I told you that if you were already interested in something that they do on there?
I don't know, Dave, maybe you could do Massimo Battura's Italian cooking. I know you
already know how to do some Italian cooking, but what if I told you you could build your confidence
with Italian cooking, Dave? I can't do it like Massimo. I would say, is there a place I could
go that has all of these collected for me that I can like watch a quick, I don't know, tutorial
or class on something? My buddy started doing masterclass a long time ago, and he told me he absolutely loved
it.
And it's always owned some real estate in my brain.
But Masterclass makes a meaningful gift this season for you and anyone on your list because
both of you can learn from the best to become your best, from leadership to effective communication
to cooking.
So whether you're watching Masterclass on TV, listening in audio mode in the app, or
on their site, the quality speaks for itself.
It's like Masterclass instructors are your own personal mentors that are going to help you reach the next level.
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Easily hundreds to thousands of dollars, but with Masterclass membership, it's only $10 a month.
That membership starts at $120 a year for unlimited access to one-on-one classes for all 180-plus Masterclass instructors,
so you can learn how to negotiate a raise with Chris Voss
or manage your relationships with Esther Peril.
There are so many different classes to go through.
Honestly, I don't want to say it was overwhelming,
but it was an absolute joy to go through all of these.
And I signed up for five different classes
because I'm different.
Wow.
That's like what, 15 hours?
I won't show 30 hours.
You did.
I remember that.
Yeah, I signed up for an Anna Wintour one about design.
I signed up for a graphic design one.
I did a little writing, a little sprinkle of some writing in there, some storytelling.
I'm going to do that one.
I like this idea of the storytelling because I already think we're pretty good writers here.
But, you know, unfolding a long story, that might help.
Boost your confidence.
Find a practical takeaway that you can apply to your life and at work.
And if you own a business or a team leader, use Masterclass to empower and create future-ready employees and leaders.
I might have to do this Tom Morello-led electric guitar class. Please do.
Please do.
It would be – I mean, that's made for me.
Heck yeah.
There's a Metallica one
just on being a band.
We're kind of a band.
We actually should
probably watch that.
You gonna start
playing the guitar?
We are kind of a band.
I used to play.
I could pick it up again.
Well,
this holiday season, Dave,
you can give one
annual membership
and get one free
at masterclass.com
slash circling.
Right now,
you can get two memberships
for the price of one
at masterclass.com
slash circling. Yup. Masterclass.com slash circling. Right now you can get two memberships for the price of one at Masterclass.com slash circling.
Yep.
Masterclass.com slash circling.
Offer terms apply.
There's an Aaron Franklin one on there, Dave.
Yes, there is.
I'm having a tough time narrowing it down.
That one, I've watched a few of his YouTube tutorials.
I'm assuming he gets more in-depth on the Masterclass one.
I highly recommend it.
He's the guy.
Yeah, I may have to do that one.
Dylan, what's your Twitter going to be?
It's real minor.
I don't take up too much of y'all's time.
But the verified accounts, they can do as many characters as they want.
The little show more thing, you know.
Why can't I just immediately drop down instead of refreshing my whole shit?
That keeps me from wanting to click on it.
Y'all feel me on this?
They paginated it, dude. It's a whole refresh situation just drop it down i don't think it's it makes me not want to read your long ass tweet it might be a page view play
i don't know it does it is dumb you see what i'm saying it is dumb yeah makes me not want to read
it i'll skip over your shit like unless it's like, 2,000 characters, why not just like show us the entire thing
as long as it's within reason?
Or just a quick drop down.
Show us what we're missing.
If you give them an inch, like they could take a mile.
It's like, it's too much, man.
I want to go different pages just to look at this.
Out of my shit, man.
See, I actually have a gripe here too.
Let's go.
So since Twitter's made some changes, I've been bookmarking more things to visit in the future, whether it's an article I want to read, photo of something, whatever.
When I click into my bookmarks, you click bookmarks, and then it takes you to another page that just says bookmarks, and you have to click bookmarks again, and then it takes you to your bookmarks.
That's stupid.
Why am I going to two different pages?
Just figure it out.
Is it an impression play that it was out
there doing trying to just i don't know nickel and dime us for impressions i could i'm over it
i'm over it were you just doing a steve-o impression i've never bookmarked anything
i need to work on my impressions that was good that was you did is you i was going biden oh okay
yeah look but you said said Biden to that impression.
I was late to work this morning.
I did something that I never thought I'd do in life.
Did you rock to work?
I rocked.
I got my 50-pound sack and I put it on my back.
You rocked and you vlogged it as you rocked.
Yeah.
A lot of people know you were doing it.
I think there's dudes out there that just take their rucksacks like halfway through
their run and they're like, fuck this.
I don't want to do this anymore.
Yeah, probably a lot.
Probably a lot.
After they get the vlog in, they're like, all right.
Remember that fake alpha male boner who we were chirping at?
He rocks.
Dude, everybody rocks.
Whenever he's stressed out or when the
haters are coming at him he just goes for a rock guys that do rocks like rock sacks are so much
different than me yeah i just i don't have that in me what do you do do you just put on ankle weights
i think it's a back you should ankle weight i think it's a weighted backpack right can you
ankle weight it why don't you ankle weight it when you're doing your Stairmaster at the gym?
People do that.
I don't know.
I don't know, Will.
It's a good idea.
I saw a dude walking on the treadmill at a very steep incline and holding kettlebells.
And while I was impressed, I was like, that doesn't look very safe.
Yeah, probably not.
I'm like watching the ankles.
I'm like, oh ankles i'm like oh no
well right on to you good sir yeah right on right on i just got several injections of botox into my
armpits it's the furthest thing from rucking it is the furthest thing from rucking yeah they're
actively trying to sweat i'm actively trying not to sweat i get it man pit stains are not fun so
it's supposed to so so we're famously we've talked about sweat numerous times like i hate i hate
swamp ass on the golf course i've gotten used to it in texas i will say that i don't like i don't
care anymore if i have it on the golf course it is what it is if you want to if you want to be a
child and call out my swamp ass be a child and call it out sir but we're not we're real ones
here we don't we don't we don't swamp shame uh
but lately my pits have just been fucking sweating like crazy like notice that to the point where
like i'll be sitting in the office in air conditioning and i'll i'll just be like i'll
have like this big of a ring of sweat on my shirts it's not a good look and like it wouldn't bother
me until i take my shirt off and it's like ruined.
There's deodorant stains.
Like, I don't want to have to go to extra steps to clean my laundry in order to do this.
I've been trying to keep the body guessing, switching deodorants, anti-perspirants.
I've been going with the prescription strength.
I've been going with natural stuff.
None of it's working.
So finally, so I was like, I think you should try the armpit Botox.
I was like, okay, let's think about this. Apparently it lasts up to six months.
You're supposed to notice it immediately.
No, it's going to take about two weeks to fully set in.
Okay.
And so I go to this office today and I go in, I take my shirt off, shout out Caleb.
He was my guy. He was the one injecting me.
I had an embarrassing moment with Caleb. Caleb, Sally was also at the appointment because I think
she knew I didn't want to get Botox injections in my armpits alone. I might've cried or something.
She was there for support.
Yeah, she was there for moral support.
She's a real one.
And she apparently has some type of friendship with our man caleb and uh he he knows that i have
sunday scares he's like how many followers followers of sunday scares have these days i
told him and then like there's a lapse in the conversation he goes he goes yeah i actually
just hit 40 i looked at him and i was like you're 40 i was like you look incredible and he was like
40 000 followers on instagram that's numbers but i was like i've but now I feel like an asshole because he looks like he's about 23.
Because he works at one of these places.
Yeah, that's tough.
He looks so good that I was like, I thought he was like 40 and looked 23, but now I'm
just an asshole who thought he was fucking 40.
You know what?
You know what a revelation I had recently?
Not to step on your story here.
No, you're good.
Someone told me recently that I told them my age, which is 40 for the record. They said, you're good someone told me recently that i'm i told them my age which is 40 for the
record they said you're aging really well now on one hand that's a nice compliment right there they
mean well it's like you look good for your age on the other hand i'm of the age now where people are
saying you age well so it's like because you're aged holy shit if i was 28 no one no one tells
a 28 year old you're
aging really well true you know what i mean because that's that's significantly younger
than 40 that's the point i'm making dave is that i'm of the age where i get comments like that now
and it was like it was kind of like a oh shit moment like i'm up there yeah and the older you
get the more of those you're gonna get and still it was a nice compliment which i appreciated
you would you rather them not say anything like that at all?
No.
They mean well.
It's not a slight to me.
You're not steaming.
It was a moment.
I had a moment.
It's better than sitting in a hot tub and having someone guess everyone's age in the hot tub,
and then she says that you're the oldest one when you're the youngest one.
Was that Cabo?
That was Cabo.
Yeah, Cabo San Lucas.
Major shouts to her and her family.
Shout out to her family.
Forgot about them.
Fun couple.
They got to the point where they got tired of seeing us around the resort.
They're like, all right, we have to say hi to these fucks every single time.
Yeah, and it clearly wasn't going to go beyond that moment in the hot tub.
Yeah.
So it's kind of like, we're not going to be like best friends here.
So I take my shirt off and he starts dotting me up.
Starts hitting me with the pen, looking where to go and everything like that.
Does he have to do like a pre-dry?
Does he towel you down?
No, he did some type of solution to it to clean the surface, I assume.
But there's no numbing.
You could ask for the numbing, but like I don't get the drift that a lot of people ask for
the numbing in there so it's like you know i i wanted to feel like i was like masculine and be
like no i don't need it dylan would get the nummy he did he did say numerous times during it he's
like oh this is a spicy spot be careful and then at one point i just had my eyes closed during a
hardcore one i just went spicy no you
didn't so i didn't mean to but i was like oh spicy that's a spicy botox taylor swift's invisible
string came on right as he started doing it and i felt like it was like a i felt like it was a
moment you got tunes yeah how long did this take in and out not very long i arrived at 901 i did
a two-page uh release form thing and then i I rolled in, and I texted you guys at like
9.35 saying I'm out.
I could use a touch right here on the old crow's feet.
Have you guys ever got Botox for anything?
No, I never have.
I hadn't either before this.
It's not something I'm opposed to.
I'm sort of opposed, but I'm not all the way opposed.
I just like, I don't know.
I'm just kind of embraced looking like shit from like an aging standpoint.
People age.
It happens, man. Shout out to my shit standpoint. People age. It happens, man.
Shout out to my shit boys.
We age.
It happens.
Yeah.
Dave, you got pretty solid skin, bro, old man.
Thanks.
For someone who smokes a pack a week, you got good skin.
I was just smoking spirits, bro.
Dude, I just noticed.
So the cut you got from, you know,
I just noticed that that scar is like from that.
No one ever notices it.
People think it's just an age line or a wrinkle.
But yeah, that's definitely a scar.
I literally just did because that's right where, you know,
in the picture that we posted on Circling Back yesterday.
For Touching Base Memorial Day?
It was a fresh cut then.
Now it's a dope looking scar.
I didn't call it Touching Base Memorial Day because I feel like that's stealing valor
so quickly after the actual Memorial Day.
What'd you call it?
Yeah.
It was Veterans Day.
I called it Cancellation Day.
Or sorry, Veterans Day.
But I don't want to steal valor from everybody.
Yeah, you said no.
You have to be aware of that.
And I think you did the right thing.
Okay, thank you.
Cancellation Day.
I had a friend in high school who was, oh, you guys play.
I say this once a month. Oh, you guys know Malone played golf in high school with him. He was a great golfer in high school who was, oh, you guys, I say this once a month.
Oh, you guys know Malone, played golf in high school with him.
He was a great golfer in high school.
He had very sweaty palms.
That was his thing.
And I believe he got, if it wasn't Botox, he got something in his palms to stop the sweating because it was grotesque.
So what they told me was that, he told me, he's like, it's not going to stop you from sweating when you're at the gym.
And I was just like, oh.
Okay.
Oh, no.
He was like, in those stationary moments when you're not doing anything,
like you won't sweat anymore.
That's all you need.
That's all I care about.
Dude, like –
That's huge.
I talked about this – I think I talked about this.
Barrett and I did a home and home with Canoe Club in Boulder.
And we talked about during the retail therapy event in New York.
Explain that. No one knows what that is. Canoe Club is a store in Denver and we had them on our podcast. We went on their podcast and we released ours on Sunday. I don't know when they're going
to release our episode with them. And we talked about the Nordstrom event in New York and I wore
like a green linen shirt. I had to wear all Nordstrom clothes, which was fine, but I was
planning on getting something to put over it at Nordstrom.
Unfortunately, in New York, they didn't have anything in my size or in the lines that I was allowed to wear based on the agreement we had with Nordstrom.
And so I just had to go like linen shirt.
Well, the nerves started kicking in.
Oh, no.
I had the worst pit stains of my life in front of a hundred people sitting there.
Every single photo that I took with any backers and if anyone anyone has any photos of me out there you can see that i'm just gluing my arms to the side and like going
like this that's what you gotta do it once it gets in your head that you might have pit stains
it just it's like a snowball effect rattles you huh you're like you just start sweating nervously
because you know you're the guy with pit stains and it's just it just increases if it wasn't a
nice shirt i would have just thrown it away like in back of the nordstrom that where
they set us up i needed this it was such a nice shirt that i just took it in high school with my
group of friends if you had pit stains no matter how minor somebody's calling you're getting called
out oh yeah there was a kid and i'm just sweating there was a kid in a that was pledging in the same
fraternity as my roommate and he would sweat so much through his armpits that they just started
calling him pits which i thought was kind of a sick nickname that's kind of a kid
suck but dude his dad's a lawyer it's frat
frat frat so yeah if you guys see me just fucking absolutely mobbing without any pit stains
that's why can i give you a wetness check no i think i think i'm a little i think i'm a little damp right now since it hasn't fully set in but we're getting there a little moist
a little moist that's a good shirt though that's breathing oh this is the worst like this is a
comfortable sweater from lululemon it's the least warm sweater i've ever owned there's no warmth in
this thing it's purely just a layer don't wear it on the golf course don't steal this from me and
wear it on the golf course dylan i was going to me and wear it on the golf course, Dylan. I was going to, but now I will not.
We had a backer reach out about some golf, and he was like,
do you think Dylan would even want to do it?
And I was like, no.
It depends.
Depends.
Probably not, though.
It's got to be a dope location for me.
It was a dope location.
Where?
But Brett stole it from you.
Sorry, bud.
Really?
Really?
You guys are going to play golf?
I'm not playing.
Oh.
I'm not either, for the record.
I famously turned it down.
Oh.
But he asked if you would be into it, and I was like, I think Dylan's pretty out on
golf right now.
Brett might be a better ask.
My clubs are at my dad's house right now, and I have no intention of going to get them
anytime soon.
I feel like if you get Botox on your face, are you kind of signing up for Botox for the rest?
Don't you have to kind of keep getting it every five or six months?
Well, to maintain that, I'm sure you'd have to look different.
Look diff?
I don't know.
I feel like if you're doing it, you better be prepared like, hey, this is your thing.
Hey, bud.
Saw this Reddit post of someone who lost the ability to bend one of their fingers i forgot
which one it was and the wrinkles on top of the finger completely went away it was smooth all the
way up just to show you like the effect of like immobility has on like wrinkles it's i thought it
like stopped wrinkles but it completely like smooths your shit out over time as you stop
moving your face it's crazy that was actually me oh there it is there it is thank you david it's the middle finger isn't that wild though
that's crazy is it both in botox like a bacteria toxic like very toxic bacteria so i don't know
some people would research things that they just get injected into their body i just say many people
i don't care i don't care dude yeah so many people do get botox at this point that like i was just
like whatever okay if it works it works, it works.
I think I heard that on Huberman.
It is Botox Day, so I did not pay full price.
I got a screaming deal.
You're right, Dave.
It is Clostridium.
Yes, yes, yes.
Botulinum type A neurotoxin complex.
Yeah.
Dude, you were just saying that.
With a little bit of.
You were just saying that before.
Albumin and a little Sonium Ch saying that with a little bit of you were just saying that before albumin and a little sodium chloride so there you go so good job david it's a lot going on there
to neurotoxin who fucking found that who is like um i'll find anything man you put this in your
face people will inject themselves with anything i'm following my botox king like will he finds
shit around oh Oh, okay.
Finds pills and just like, I'll take this.
Y'all see that tweet about someone found a rolled cigarette in the freezer at a grocery store recently?
No.
Can you freeze cigs?
I don't know.
You probably could.
Caleb B. Martin is actually the name of the guy that did it for me.
He just got that follow from me.
Let me see.
Oh, yeah.
Good looking skin. Oh, yeah. His skin was like like flawless which made me feel a lot better about doing this
okay not only does this guy not look 40 this this dude looks young i told i texted sally after i
said will you please apologize to him because he looks 23 he really does look like he's so youthful
and i was like you're 40 i was like you look great did you think about maybe getting a little
little something up top they pitched it and i was like i don't really want to like that that just seems not fun it's
the same toxin that causes a life-threatening type of food poisoning oh but in small doses
under the skin it can be quite so you can micro micro dose it basically are you reading that from
your favorite website mr skin.com i just knew that that was just off the dome, actually. Oh, Terry Botox over here, right?
That's good.
Shout out to Alpha Remain.
That's good, Dave.
It's good.
It's added value.
It's good.
I like that.
Impressions.
So yeah, that was my Botox experience in my armpits today.
I'm anxious to see how it helps.
I'm very excited.
I'm very excited.
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Dude, rule number 76.
No excuses.
Play like a champion.
Potentially the most over-quoted movie of our lifetime.
Yeah, it's probably number one.
That or Anchorman. Old School was up there, too. I too i think i don't know why and this probably isn't just but i
do think that people who quote wedding crashers are uh a tier above people that do anchorman
a tier above for some reason why i don't know it's a smart comedy no it's not a smart comedy
i just think that i think it's a funnier movie. I think I'm more okay with it.
Look, I'm guilty of being all three of these people.
And you know what?
All three movies are good movies.
I think they stand the test of time.
Sometimes that quote's just there for the taking.
Someone's going to take it.
Lock it up.
I knew a lot of lock it up guys.
They would tell you to lock it up.
I know. I know. I'm acting up. I'll stop. take it lock it up i knew a lot of lock it up guys they would tell you to lock it up like yeah i've
seen i know i know i'm acting up i'll stop wasn't there a period where they were talking about
like wedding crashers 2 happening i feel like i haven't heard anything about that
i don't know i didn't hear that there was the same cast there was a time
i'm keeping the painting todd
why are we talking about this?
I'm sorry.
Because there is a wedding crasher, a real life one, named Sandra Lynn Henson, 57 years old.
Was she just trying to catch some D?
She stole tens of thousands in cash and presents during six-year crime spree of attending strangers' nuptials across three states.
She stole a lamb.
I don't think she's that.
I don't know if she was caught eating a piece of cake by the bride's sister
before she handed over the $200 she stole when family members threatened her.
To actually sit down and eat the cake is funny.
That's a, that's, that's a, like you're comfortable at this point.
Yeah.
It's like, I'm getting really good at this.
I'm just going to enjoy some cake while I steal these presents at the same time.
Only got 200 out of that thing?
I mean, I know she probably wasn't done, but like, not really worth it for 200.
She was casing the joint, dude.
I guess she was.
So what?
She would just go to weddings and just lift envelopes and call it a day?
Yeah.
You think it was only envelopes?
She would take like uh you know cake
platters and stuff too how many weddings are doing cash envelopes you don't see that much anymore
it's it's all it's mostly digital now right it's very much like a catholic um potentially italian
thing i think it's cool to give cash for a wedding yeah yeah i don't do it but i think it's cool i gave um i guess i'll spoil it
we're giving barrett uh cryptocurrency actually i'm offloading some nfts to barrett and laura
i gotta get them a gift i haven't done that that's sergio bacca one that i got from brett
i'm gonna just transfer it over digitally they kind of fucked up that barrett chose the same
wedding date as mine. Really?
I don't know if there's enough room for the both of us on February 23rd.
Same exact day?
Yeah.
You guys can do joint anniversary parties.
I don't know if he burns.
If y'all were tasked right now with crashing a wedding solo,
what's your game plan?
What are you putting into motion let's say you
have to go to let's say the wedding is you skip the ceremony right it's just you just go to the
yeah you don't go to the ceremony go to the ceremony it's like well i don't know going to
the ceremony kind of solidifies you as someone that's a familiar face if you see other people
just sit in the back keep to yourself i think this lady's issue is that she shouldn't she shouldn't
pose as a guest.
She should pose as someone that's working at the wedding.
I feel like that's easier to get exposed that way.
I feel like I might toss a camera bag on my shoulder and just walk around and pretend
to shoot photos and then lift a couple envelopes and get out of there.
Because the other staff members would be like, I don't recognize you.
Are you new here?
And then you're like, oh.
Have you ever worked as a caterer?
No.
I'll tell you this, Dylan.
As someone who, maybe it was just the catering company that I worked for, but when I worked
a summer as a caterer, we had no clue who was on the catering team.
There were so many people doing stuff that like, you would see new people every single
shift and you wouldn't even think about it.
There's pressure to get the uniform right though.
There is.
We had black pants, white shirt, pretty easy.
That's why I think you go as a camera person
because you can just like toss it over the shoulder wear all black sneakers yeah yeah
if you're gonna go and try to pose as an attendee and you're a guy suit wise you got to keep it
modest you got to keep something you got to go very generic maybe off the rack men's warehouse
something like that you can't hit him with this you can't hit him with like a suit supply like ultra tailored suits you're right yeah
girls go crazy for a sharp dress man that's right you got to keep it but you have you know what make
part of it ill-fitting not not terribly to where you're causing a scene but like the break on the
jacket's a little long like it's it's going uh mid-palm almost and people are like okay surely no one would crash a wedding in such a coat actually you're wrong i don't know anybody
here emma's still your money and your girl and maybe your girl and i'm gonna eat some cake too
and if there's a pill on the ground i'll look it up and i'm gonna take it
totally fine with that as long as you know you're putting in your body you can do that
and i'm probably gonna poop here too i'm gonna just do everything here you're just totally i don't know if i've
ever done a wedding poop i think i could i think i can safely say i've never pooped at a wedding
no i definitely haven't yeah same same i guess let's think about it i don't i feel like that's
fine you know randy tore his pants at a wedding yeah because i poop so hard really okay why didn't you
pull your pants down when you were pooping why'd you poop through your why'd you poop through your
pants the hell it was to spur the moment man wow did you hear rand did your monday's episode where
randy says he brings uh lock picking kits to bars i said that i thought maybe it would be a good
idea tell them why so that i could pick locks and use construction port-a-potties instead of having to wait in line in restrooms at bars.
I think you're trying to get into the speakeasy part of the bars that you were bitching about yesterday.
Yeah.
Randy's famously out on speakeasy bars.
You know what?
But he's famously in on bars that have a secret speakeasy.
This is a good Randy take.
It's a good take.
It's a good take.
Bars that just pop up and it's like, yeah, we're a speakeasy.
You're really not.
You want a speakeasy inside the regular bar?
Yeah.
Like a speakeasy option?
A secret bar inside the bar.
Everly has that.
Okay.
There's another one.
But it's not always open, the secret bar.
Yeah.
Shangri-La has one.
Greenlight Social.
Kung Fu Saloon.
Kung Fu Saloon.
Kung Fu has it?
Yeah.
In the back bar at Eberly, there's a door that says manager on it, and it's not an office.
Oh.
It's a doorway to the secret bar.
Was Eberly the bar that the waitress who was definitely flirting with you just absolutely dunked on you for ordering a frosé?
Yeah, she wouldn't bring me.
I couldn't tell if she was flirting with you or if she was actually disgusted by you.
I think she was, and she was also very cute she was cute she just
gammed on you though believe i was spoken for at the time i here's my official take about you
drinking rosé i don't think you're allowed to drink it after dark oh what if i don't care i
just want to drink rosé on my own terms how about that that's not how it works no we don't let you
do things you want to do i got bad news but it was funny waitress tells you you can't order something you can't order there were like four of us all
guys and it was like whiskey whiskey whiskey and then i was like i want a frose and she was like
dudes will hear that and say hell yeah if a waitress told me i couldn't get a frozen drink
i would leave well yeah that's good i mean you're the first it was funny so i was like going along
with it but i really wanted a Frosé.
She actually brought it to you, though, right?
No, she did not.
Respect.
Absolutely.
Nothing but respect for my queen.
I think I pivoted to an old-fashioned.
She wanted to take you in those unisex bathrooms and kiss you on the mouth.
Those are the best hookup bathrooms in Austin, or drug bathrooms.
How do you know that?
Right?
Okay.
They are.
I've never been in a bathroom like that.
They're big, and they're private.
They're unisex.
They're awesome.
Really?
Door goes all the way up and down.
Randy, probably enough room for you to poop your pants.
Sew your pants back or some shit, whatever you do.
Didn't you do that?
I sewed them at a desk, which I didn't know was the owner of the venue's desk.
And I got told that I can't be sitting at that desk.
Pantless. Yeah, you can't sit pantless at the owner's desk and I got told that I can't be sitting at that desk. Pantless.
Yeah, you can't sit pantless at the owner's desk.
Did I make out in one of those stalls one time?
Yeah, I did.
Most?
No.
Loose meat or tight meat?
Okay.
I don't remember.
Boy, they really messed up when they said loose meat sandwich.
You can't say loose meat sandwich, dude.
Can you look up an actual loose meat sandwich and say that's a thing, Dave? I think it's the only sloppy joke. That's what it said. It's the only thing. A whole pork sandwich is loose meat sandwich. You can't say loose meat sandwich, dude. Can you look up like an actual loose meat sandwich
and say that's a thing, Dave?
I think it's the only sloppy joke.
That's what it said.
It's the only thing.
A whole pork sandwich is loose meat.
Oh, fair enough.
Fair enough.
Yeah?
Chopped beef.
Chopped beef.
All that meat is loose, dude.
Okay, so yeah, loose meat sandwiches
are straight up just ground beef,
apple cider vinegar, brown sugar, and bacon, I guess.
It's called a tavern sandwich.
That sounds dang.
Tavern sandwich is much better
than a loose meat sandwich
i'll say that apparently they make them good at made right i don't know what made right is oh
that's iowa i made them extra sloppy for yes lady movies lady you're scaring us
okay um yeah i mean i don't condone i don't, I mean, wedding crashing, it's not good behavior.
I'm glad I did it once. I will never do it again.
I've never done it.
We, I've told you guys, I did it in the most like harmless way of all time. We sat at the
country club bar that was on the other side of the wall of the wedding and we dressed a little
nicer just in case we could slide in and maybe talk to some girls.
I'd be too nervous, man.
A bridesmaid called us out immediately as we sat in the bar.
She said, you guys are crashing this wedding.
And we were like, oh, no, our buddy's dad's a member here.
So we were just hanging and eating pizza.
Most of the time, the bride and the groom, they don't know everyone at the wedding.
You know?
It's like dates of like distant relatives
here's the issue you know in harper springs michigan oh fair enough you kind of know
everybody yeah fair enough yeah i think we even knew the bride i'm pretty sure somebody uh
somebody crashed my my sister's wedding they were just sitting at a table in the back like
during the reception oh they got my mom poured them out really oh crash the wrong wedding damn i uh famously crashed my own house party because nobody came
sick i don't get it we don't and priests were the boys that we guys we praised
oh this is some pop punk bullshit
i heard you were just in crossfire of some pop punk references all monday dude yeah i don't i
don't like it we need a super cut of that i don't like it when it happens i just get so lost you can
get a super cut dude i've i grew up on super cuts i went to super cuts quite a bit in the last
couple years when i gave up weren'teren't great haircuts, looking back.
Unless I want to drop the bag.
The lady that cut my hair growing up, her name was Madge.
That's sick.
Yeah.
My dad finally – I asked my dad why he switched me later in life.
I was like, yeah, why did I stop going to her?
And he was like, honestly, she just made you look stupid.
Fair enough.
Yeah, just not good haircuts for you.
She's bad at her job.
Okay.
He still went there though. did she have a sister how would i know that david i don't know is there a reference here no he's
similar name just a different first letter you played wordle right now you're doing real life wordle
about madge speaking of pit stains tough room tough room oh i should hit you with this i have
a new sound drop ready i don't think so tim
al borland yeah what's he doing? You know.
Infomercial?
Not sure.
I took some time yesterday when I wanted to add that, and I spent some time watching some greatest hits
from Home Improvement on YouTube.
It might get the nod from me as a casual show around the house.
There's some really funny moments in that show,
some really heartfelt moments as well.
Sweatshirt game, stupid stupid i just like when mark goes goth
oh pamela anderson was on that show for a run too right
she was attractive oh yeah she was the binford tools girl then they switched it up no no i think
pam was it yasmine bleath at some point it was a
brunette after yeah you're right was it yasmin was pamela the original surely she was the original
and then she moved on to baywatch and i think i don't know i mean bleath did too was it yasmin
her name was lisa she was binford's tool girl and she was portrayed by um oh she did leave because
of baywatch yeah she had conflicts with baywatch and so then uh
who did they replace her with though because they had several other infertile girls they had heidi
oh yeah but heidi was not yasmin bleeth i don't think yasmin bleeth was that they wouldn't get
they wouldn't have they wouldn't lose someone to baywatch and then get yasmin bleeth fair
fair point oh of course it was portrayed by uh deb dunning
ah deb don't remember her well i remember heidi oh yeah chill out never
tim's eldest son brad had a crush on heidi and is always sweet talking her even though she is
married yeah why don't you fucking calm down brad she was a little cutie pie just relax just relax it's her 2h she's a master
electrician before landing the role as heidi debbie dunning first appeared as kiki vaughn
first or wallen shine law in the season two episode of overactive glance? I have overactive sweat glands in my armpits.
Mark Taylor had a crush on her, too.
Why don't you chill?
And Mark?
How do you not have a crush on her?
Randy's still thinking about her.
Look at him.
Yeah, it's fair.
Let's look her up on Instagram, Dylan.
We don't need to do that.
I'm just here.
I like to do the where are they now.
Okay.
Yeah, look her up.
Look her up and we'll check in.
I want to speak.
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Ooh.
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I think we should get like the Too Much Dip Boys
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I've dabbled.
I do prize picks weekly, and I'm doing okay.
I started out not great, but I'm doing okay.
It is fun.
It's fun because it's not as –
I feel like they give you opportunities, and it's different.
It's different.
I can do cross-sport stuff like Will said.
I think that's cool.
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And they got the reboot policy too.
Somebody gets injured in the first half.
Oh yeah.
That's sick.
That's sick.
I exposed someone on the timeline yesterday.
I'm not talking loose meat,
but I am talking Sydney Sweeney.
So Randy's meat might be just behind the producer why'd you
have to drag her like that here's the thing man here's the thing i just feel like it's not talked
about enough you pointed you point out something that i i still don't even know what what you're
pointing out but there's something there i know she's an android girl right is this an ick for anybody? She's a perfect 10, but her texts are green.
Dave, answer.
She's an Android girl.
Right.
This bothers me a little bit.
But it's Sweeney's.
I'm probably not going to be in a group text with her.
Let's say you guys are single.
Still affect me.
That doesn't matter.
If you're texting your girl and she's got green texts, it's a little off-putting.
Imagine you're single.
You get shot into some Hollywood event.
Sydney Sweeney, she doesn't want to be there.
You're waiting for a drink at the bar.
She's like, I'm so tired of these events.
I just got back from Australia.
I'm just tired.
Commiserate with her.
You got to start hitting it off.
What's your icebreaker?
With Sydney Sweeney?
Yep.
My buddy Randy thinks you're not hot. hitting it off. What's your icebreaker? With Sidney Sweeney? Yep. My friend,
my buddy Randy
thinks you're not hot.
I don't,
no,
that's not what I said.
I just said she's not
my number one
like someone else.
That's understandable.
You said other stuff.
I said that she is
fine looking.
I won't fully expose you,
but you said some other stuff
that was damning.
So,
you hit it off with her
and suddenly
you exchange numbers with her.
She takes your phone, she texts, she exchange numbers with her. She takes your phone.
She texts a little thing.
You get your phone back and you look and you're like, wait, what?
She gave me a fake number.
It's green.
She hits you back.
Are you just like, what?
Why did she?
She doesn't have an iPhone?
Then you start texting her every morning like, how'd you sleep?
No, you're too sexy.
You dropped this, queen.
What are you doing today?
You just used really corny internet lingo on her the whole time.
Yeah.
You know what I would say?
You know my icebreaker for Sidney Sweeney?
I would just walk out and be like, you should smile more.
She would love that.
What do you say to someone like that?
Like, look.
Hey, loved you in Lotus.
No, Dave just, I know what Dave would say.
Hi, Sydney Sweeney.
Yeah.
Work for Adrian Grenier.
I need to have, I want that presence in my mind.
I want to deploy that one day, Dave.
I really do.
Dude, I don't know why I did it, but I did it.
I think I'm just going to do that.
Next time I see Marsden somewhere, I'm just going to be like, hi, James Marsden.
He's out and about.
He's everywhere, dude.
There's two things taking over Austin right now.
Australian people and James Marsden.
It's true.
There's an Aussie taking over.
Where has he been spotted?
Where does he hang out?
A lot of places.
Like, he's everywhere.
I haven't seen him.
You got to go see him.
Are you getting out?
Not really.
That's probably my problem.
Emma Stone got a house here now, too?
She does.
Yeah, I've heard that for a long time.
I've never seen Emma Stone.
Because her house is being renovated.
It has been for a very long time, actually.
It's right next door to Anthony or Tony Gonzalez's house.
They're having an issue with the subcontractors.
They're next door neighbors.
The subs are having some problems with their materials.
It's a whole thing.
You know how it is.
Yeah.
Got to get on the phone, pull them outony gonzalez's house is sick he gone surprisingly he has money um handsome guy too hall of famer
right yeah he's in the discussion for the goat tight end i don't like that there's current
tight ends playing that people like try to say are like goat tight here's the thing the positions
change the game has changed yeah you're right but he's he's in the discussion
he's also a good looking man he's in still in really good shape too um well while i was on
the timeline yesterday just doing you know sweeney stuff white lotus stuff obviously came up and i
saw a tweet said 13 roles are currently being cast for white lotus season three nine of them are
series regulars ranging in ages between 18 to the 80s we have a patriarch a corporate executive an
actress a couple of mothers a misfit and a yogi are they bringing sweeney's back they're bringing
a picnic i i i don't get the feeling
that Sydney Sweeney
turns down roles
at this point
but I don't know
I don't know if she was
like enough of a player
on that to bring her back
but she's Swains
she brings an audience
with her
yeah she does
she does
remember her friend
was just stealing
from her family
you can't bring
a friend on vacation
and let them steal
from your family
you brought the wrong friend
in fact that wasn't
really even a friend at all
you got played really even a friend at all.
You got played.
You got a friend.
If you could have like one random celebrity in the next season of White Lotus,
like who do you want?
I never would have come up with Michael Imperioli,
but when I saw him in there,
I was so excited that it was like, oh, perfect.
Yeah.
Ooh, that's a-
Bradley Cooper.
If you could have one returning person,
who would you have
sweet that's too horny dude yeah dude her character wasn't even good in the show no she
wasn't who's my guy steve's on it was good i kind of feel like so my theory my theories are going
to bring connie britain and megan fahey back to sisters and that would mean we get zon you know
what connie britain is probably the answer but if you brought connie britain or steve zon back like i wouldn't be mad at either
britain is lovely big fan i really want her and daphne to be sisters and i want them to
to go wild on this vacation
did daphne did she stuck she stuck with that her cheating uh husband yeah but i think she
cheated too based on what she said in the show.
Oh.
Remember?
Because she was like, you have to do what you have to do to be happy or something.
Facts.
Yeah, it was very, very scandalous.
Not a lot of communication in that marriage there.
I also think she gave Aubrey Plaza's husband in the show a little hand jibber in the back.
That's right.
Yeah.
Kind of left it open whether they, Aubrey Plaza and the husband did a little. I heardber in the back that's right yeah kind of left it open whether they uh abby
pausa and the husband did a little i heard she loosened his meat sex okay okay did you really
hear that no no no i think she did an interview where she indicated that something might have
happened in there but i also think that like that's just not even written i'd like to see
shia labBeouf
in a White Lotus.
Be careful, Dave.
He's a little,
he's always towing the line
of cancellation.
People keep cancellation.
Someone tagged me
in a video of him
like doing like a,
doing like a cell phone promo
for some Mexican restaurant
in California.
He's a bit odd.
That fella.
It was a really good promo he cut.
Not surprising.
Well, yeah,
I think from an acting standpoint, he's a very good actor. cut not surprised well yeah he's he's i think from an
acting standpoint he's a very good actor i just think that he also might have some skeletons in
his closet that might trend abusive you know the best actors are a little cuckoo yeah okay so not
shia labeouf okay i didn't i just thought like i still think bradley cooper would be good i wouldn't
be mad if they brought Shane back from season one.
Oh, yeah.
He was incredible.
That guy was awesome.
He was such a good character.
All right, give me Danny McBride.
Okay.
And he's the same person he is in quite literally everything he does.
And it throws off the show a little bit, but once you get used to it, you're like, yeah, this actually makes sense. Okay.
Okay. For a second, I thought you meant Danny to it, you're like, yeah, this actually makes sense. Okay. Okay.
For a second, I thought you meant Danny Glover.
That would have been cool too.
No, not D-Glove.
I will say, I think White Lotus should do something they haven't done in the last two seasons and maybe, I don't know, cast any person of color.
Ooh.
You see, the last season is like the whitest season of all time.
People are like yeah
maybe we should get one in here i don't know you know i'm not i'm not too upset that steffler's mom
uh has passed because i think she was wearing out her welcome on the show a bit if they go
like prequel style or something and then like we have her back i'm gonna be like we're doing too
much with yeah spoiler by the way she did die in the last season.
It's been long.
It's been long enough.
We broke down every episode on this podcast.
So if anyone's going to complain
about spoilers.
Good point.
Yeah, you've seen it.
People have seen it.
Don't be a dumbass.
Are we going to get shows back
now that the...
So the font's different
on the stories?
Oh yeah, that's how I knew.
Yeah.
It's different. I still don't see yeah. That's how I knew. Yeah. It's different.
I still don't see it.
Are you not a typeface guy?
Do you not have typeface blogs that you go read and stuff?
No.
Should I?
You know the difference between a font and a typeface?
Is there a master class on typeface that I know?
There might be.
I got a feeling there is.
I don't know the difference.
What is it?
I don't know.
I was thinking about getting Botox and being typeface.
He probably doesn't even know what a serif is.
What?
Dude, do you know what a serif is, Playboy?
I've seen the font called serif.
I don't know what a serif is.
Yeah, you're exposing yourself right now, dude.
Loose meat everywhere.
What is it?
Serif is like the little detail on letters that gives a little flair.
So if something is sans serif, it's more of a straightforward letter.
A slight projection finishing off a stroke of a letter in certain typefaces.
Got it.
Typeface would be the worst Batman villain.
I'm typeface.
I put my head under a typewriter and typed all over me.
That's good, dude.
I'm out for revenge.
That's how he talks.
Because typewriter is traditionally older.
I've been trying to think of ways to do things more analog to not be on my phone as much lately.
You know, like buying a record player and stuff like that.
Like what if I just become a typewriter guy?
What if I just start like, hey, can you guys take my typewriter column and put it in Washed Weekly for me?
It would just be doing a lot.
They'll have to hunt and pack the entire thing in there.
That would be
quite annoying i learned typing uh keyboard class on a on a word processor you remember the word
is like the step up it was like the next gen typewriter you know the electric those things
sucked yeah i didn't i didn't freak with typewriters i actually i actually learned
typewriter typing through mario learned typing through Mario teaches typing.
Mavis Beacon.
You guys know Mario, the guy who rummaged through pipes?
I still don't know how to type.
He was always dodging, man-eating Venus fly traps, grabbing up coins, and fighting hammer-slinging turtles, and stumbling upon polka-dotted mushrooms.
He would even eat them.
For sure.
Yeah, he would for sure do that.
He would even turn into giants and going on full-blown rampages. He's a eat them. For sure. Yeah, he would for sure do that. He would even turn, turning into giants and going on full-blown rampages.
He's a wild man.
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So yesterday in the office, I kind of wanted to get a little skip in my step. I couldn't talk
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use code steam. We've got Taylorlor swift cruise are you guys going on
it i have no desire nope yep big year cruises for me first i got the creed cruise it's gonna be sick
then the chilling the most one killing the most that one's gonna be that one's gonna take it out
of me because a lot of chilling on that one and And then I got the T-Swift cruise. So, I mean, I'm not like,
I'm not so anti-cruises
that I'm telling other people not to go on cruises,
but there's really nothing
that could convince me to go on a cruise at this point.
What if like, oh, I don't know,
Brody Jenner was on there
and Lil Dickie and me.
Tyga.
I'm going to say that we had such an enjoyable time on that cruise.
You don't want to spoil it.
As weird as it was.
I honestly don't know if I could enjoy that again like that.
The fact that that cruise ship that we were on had nothing on it in certain areas.
I don't feel like all cruise ships exist like that.
We had several parts of the ship that just had no one on them so you and i could just spread out and enjoy ourselves
can i make our meat can i make a general comment about this cruise and about taylor swift
her brand is becoming a little too powerful just we're a bit overexposed i know that some
swifties might come at me but uh just it's too much swift too much man we don't need a taylor swift cruise we don't need theaters
full of people watching her her shows oh wow so how is she allowed to make money don't tell us
she's doing just fine for herself it's just it's just a lot how much money is a woman allowed to
we're overexposed man how often can a woman expose herself don i can't answer that one i think i
think a lot of people might agree with me on this.
Oh, okay.
Look, I love Taylor Swift.
To be fair to her, she's not the one coordinating this, Dylan.
This is done by Marvelous Mouse Travels.
They're organizing the In My Cruise era,
a group cruise that will bring fans together
on a Royal Caribbean international trip.
She's not affiliated or expected to appear on the cruise.
So my fear is that like,
if I went on a cruise, I would not know that this was the, in my cruise era. And we'd be like the
old people on the EDM cruise that we had Dylan. I felt so awful for those poor people. Can you
imagine how loud this cruise is going to be? Just screaming. Like the heirs tour. My ears have never
rung as much as they did after the heirs tour.. And I was early heiress tour, so I don't even think it had fully become what it is now.
I think now it's even a bigger beast.
Is there a chance she shuts this down?
Yes.
She's got to fire off a season to sis.
Like, come on, man.
But what if people have already been booking it?
Then you're going to have a bunch of people being like, we're just trying to go hang out.
people being like, we're just trying to go hang out.
She can't stop them from
everybody kind of coordinating and
wearing their own era stuff
and what music they play on
the cruise ship.
But as far as promoting,
it's going to be interesting. Are you saying there's
not a chance that she just kind of shows up one night
like, hey, it's me.
I'm on the cruise ship. What are the odds of that happening?
She's going to do what the Chains chain smokers did and just chop her in
for their performance
and then leave
that's a baller move
it was a baller move
almost as ballers
playing roses
like six times
now they're all with that
it's one of their
two good songs
you got a dope
interview off though
chain smokers came through
it was lit man
that's good
they let TKLs
do a little DJing
actually ties in
I don't think
Taylor Swift
will ever be like
overexposed
in terms of like
most people's opinion
just because so many
people love her
but I do worry
that Travis Kelsey
is going to get exposed
to the point
where like people
are very sick
of Travis Kelsey
and I don't think
that's just
he just wants to
go to the show
and she's out there
like changing up lyrics to involve him and then kissing him he's just that's just. He just wants to go to the show and she's out there like changing up lyrics
to involve him
and then kissing him.
He's just like,
oh, hey,
I was just here to support you.
And now we're kind of,
now he knows who he signed up for.
She's probably the most famous woman
in the world right now.
Yeah, he gets it.
Oh, really?
You think so?
Yeah.
Who's more famous?
Oh, I don't know.
Maybe Mary. Okay. From the Bible? Tyler Moore? yeah who's who's more famous oh i don't know maybe uh mary okay from the bible tyler moore
yeah from the bible
all right yeah they're marrying you guys you and her have a lot in common both virgins
that's pretty good dude that's pretty good you left. That's pretty good.
You left my dog hanging, but that was still good.
Oh, I'm sorry, dude.
Dap a player up over there.
That was good, man.
You think she's more famous than Hillary Clinton?
Yeah, I do, David.
Okay, dude.
Who's the most famous person in the world it's it's like messy and taylor swift
and uh donald trump is super famous do you think there's any like bollywood stars out there that
are like under our radar they're like k-pop sensations that are under our radar yeah
i don't know technically i don Yeah. I don't know.
That are technically – I don't know.
I don't know either. Because whenever I see something like K-pop trending, I'm always shocked by how many –
it's just crazy how many people are tweeting about it.
They're mad popular.
I want to go to a K-pop concert really bad.
They had a bunch of K-pop come to the Houston Rodeo.
I don't know if it was last year or the year before.
I had some friends that went to it, and they said it was incredible.
Really?
Just electric.
It doesn't do much for me. That's one you want to bring earplugs to i brought earplugs to t swift and i had them in for about three minutes and i was like this is stupid took them out you brought
earplugs to the taylor swift concert yeah that's such an old man move uh i'm at the point where
like i think i'm gonna start bringing earplugs places dude it was very loud you wouldn't know
because you didn't go. No offense.
But it's very loud in there.
I didn't want to go.
No offense taken.
I bet you would have gone if you had a chance.
Probably not.
Yeah, you would have.
Oh, I forgot.
You don't respect Taylor Swift as a woman.
I love Taylor Swift.
I don't like concerts.
I told you all that.
How do you not like concerts?
It's not how I like to take in my music.
You just complained about me not inviting you to a concert to start off this episode.
Now you're saying you don't like concerts.
Receipts.
I want the invitation, but I'm going to decline it.
You got the invitation.
You did famously invite us.
If you guys have the opportunity to go see Green Sky Bluegrass in concert, go do it.
They put on an absolute show.
You know I'm a trampled by turtles guy.
You know that about me.
Trampled by turtles. That's their that about me. Trampled by turtles.
That's their number one hit.
Turtle power.
That sounds awesome.
It's good.
I would go to this if they were to be like, hey, we'd love to pay you guys monies to go on this trip,
and we'll get you all out there, fly you out to wherever the port is, whatever, talk to your families whatever be like hey they're
gonna be gone for five days how long is this cruise i would go is what i'm trying to say
this would be fun actually you know what it'd probably be a little weird because i got a feel
in the demographic might not really do you wish you'd gone on our edm cruise honestly i've i've i've wrestled with this one no i no i don't because i think it were it may
not have worked out the same the the way that the cruise the way that it went down for dylan and i
i when we first showed up at the cruise i was like oh no i regret coming here this is tight
quarters a lot is going on.
The EDM music is louder than I thought.
We're all like crammed in this pool.
I was like, I'm going to have an anxiety attack in the middle of the ocean.
But then once we figured out that we could move about the ship, do whatever the fuck we wanted with no repercussions.
We settled in nicely.
But then like once we got off the ship and our internet started working again and we started getting angry emails about how we didn't post anything from the trip and stuff.
I was just like, okay, maybe this wasn't working. That wasn't y'all's fault no it wasn't no yeah we had no service like yeah dylan couldn't even like like reach parks if he wanted to without
using my phone my phone was the only thing that worked i didn't even tell other people my phone
worked because i didn't want i didn't want everyone from the the trip hitting me up
do you think the there's a chance that the the people who signed up for it the older people
didn't know they could they have had a good time potentially yeah that's honestly like
the real buzzkill there were corners of the ship you could sneak off to and and be somewhat alone
and it's a good story hopefully they appreciate a good story like oh we signed up bernie dm cruise
i don't know if they took the the little dinghy over to the island for the chain smokers
concert but uh they probably had a good time the dinghy trips were fun yeah i enjoyed those
what island was it where was this we're playing with your dinghy i don't know tommy boy couldn't
tell you i couldn't even i i like it was pry if i was on the stand right now and i had just
gotten sworn in and they asked me,
so where was the EDM cruise that you took?
There's no way I could.
I don't even know.
Caribbean.
I know we took off from Miami.
Miami?
Yeah, we did.
Okay.
Just making sure it wasn't some islands out there you want to avoid.
One in particular.
Release the flight logs.
Epstein.
Little St. James.
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earlybirdcbd.com that's code backer at earlybirdcbd.com dylan what are you getting into this
weekend oh thank you will um it's very sadly parks is leaving town friday he's going to california
for a week with his mother i'm gonna miss a shit out of that little guy Going, going To Cali, Cali
Which means I'm pretty wide open
Saturday I will be going out to a brewery
In the afternoon
Out Driftwood Way
With my sister, brother-in-law and my two little nieces
That'll be fun
But I'm going to have to take it easy
Because we have an event
A crazy event is happening that night
Does that brewery have good pizza?
Or am I thinking of something else?
I can pull the name of it for you.
Give me a sec here.
You want to know if he's playing a Zocard.
Well, there's a brewery that's kind of like a little out there in Austin that I've never been to that people say has good beer and better pizza.
Vista Brewing.
I've never been.
It looks like a pretty dope place from what I can tell. Yeah.
Now that I have kids and shit, I feel like like we gotta start going to places that are like a little
out of town little drive let the kids run around i'll give you my full review when i return wonderful
salt lake is it near salt lake it's out driftwood way so probably okay driftwood is very confusing
it's a very you always hear it's blowing up and I have no reason to believe that that's not true.
But you go out there, and you're like, what?
Who?
Where's – apparently a lot of Californians.
It's pretty sick.
Yeah.
And then Saturday we have a little – I can talk about this, right?
No reason to keep this one a secret.
I don't see why not.
Yeah, a little wedding shower situation for Barrett and Barrett's fiance.
Really looking forward to that.
I got to get a gift.
I haven't done that yet.
I got my fit picked out of my head, though, and I'm going to look really good.
Shacket?
We've got to look forward to.
No shacket.
And then, yeah, I'm pretty wide open after that.
What's the dress code?
Not much else going on.
It's a Barrett, John, so you know you're going to have to dress.
It says probably flirty boy swag.
It may be flirty boy swag. he actually sent a style guide for everybody it says what not to wear and it's just he linked to your instagram that's really rude he's putting me in an awkward
spot because he's normally for events like this i normally like will give him a fit pic before i go
like hey give me some give me some thoughts on. I can't do that before his event.
Yeah.
I have the invitation on my fridge at home.
I'll check that out for a tire, but I don't think it's listed.
I could be wrong.
I won't get him tires for a gift.
I won't.
And that's all I got, guys.
That would actually be a sick gift.
Brett could use some.
Tires are expensive.
Yeah, Brett really needs some new tires.
I'll be looking to step out, though, if you want to step out.
You probably won't because it's the weekend. You don't want to hang out. You trying to step expensive. Yeah, Brett really needs some new tires. I'm looking to step out, though. If you want to step out, you probably won't because it's the weekend.
You don't want to hang out.
You trying to step out?
Yeah, bitch.
Trying to let go a little?
Yeah.
Okay.
There's a crazy event happening, so.
We'll see how crazy it is.
Yeah, that is actually what I'm doing as well.
And we might do like our last little date night, Alyssa and I, as her mom will be down here to watch the Roadsman.
Sorry, Dave.
I was being real in the middle of your weekend.
Oh, that's tight.
Yeah.
Obby's being real too.
I kind of like that.
I might get on there.
Dude, be real so lit.
You're not getting on there.
Okay.
Well, I'm going to do it now.
We're about to have seven.
Do you guys have any genres of where's the last do you guys have any uh
genres of food for the last date night um she normally handles the uh logistics
and pretty much the entire process so yeah i don't know maybe we'll uh maybe she'll find
i've been i've been craving I just want to go to a nice
Italian restaurant
it's not Sammy's
not that Sammy's
isn't good
it's just
Sammy's has been
like the go-to
I just want to
I want to try something new
you got to keep yourself
guessing on the Italian
exactly
go to Vespio dog
Vespio is good
I love Vespio
and all sneaky easy
to
I feel like
where it used to be
to get in there
so we may do that
other than that that's all I got And I was sneaky easy to, I feel like it used to be, to get in there. So we may do that.
Other than that, that's all I got.
I don't know, man.
My weekend's in flux right now.
It's not great.
Thursday night, the U.S. men's national team.
You guys familiar with these guys?
Heard of them.
Soccer boys.
They're at the Q2 Stadium in Austin, Texas.
And it feels like if the U.S. men's national team's in town, I got to go support them. So I've extended an invite to some people. A lot of people are busy. Producer Micah has indicated that he might be interested. If he turns me down, I might
actually go to this game alone. I might just go see the boys run. And then Friday, I'm just at
home. It's me and the boys. Fridays are for the boys.
It's a new thing I'm doing.
I think it's got legs.
Sally's going to go see noted comedian Benny Drama at his comedy show in Austin, Texas.
So I'm going to have my first night completely solo on kid duty.
I'm a little nervous.
I haven't done two kids all at once.
It's scary.
It's scary.
So, yeah, I'm going to go mob with them for a little bit.
I think probably going to order some pizza.
Fritz has been loving ranch lately.
He does this really cute thing with his ranch container where I make it for him so he can dip his pizza in it.
And it's so cute.
He just dumps it all over the counter.
I love that move.
And asks for more ranch.
Oh, no.
I was like, what's your problem, dude?
Classic.
Saturday, obviously, obviously going to Barrett's party because of some babysitter issues.
I might be solo after that party looking to have a drink somewhere.
And I have a couple of locations that might interest squad members in my mind right now.
Care to share that with the rest of us right now?
Maybe later.
I'm on Mob Watch.
Part of the reason I don't want to say it is because I'm worried that one of the options is such a good idea
that I don't want to risk not having tables there.
I don't want to unleash this place.
If I have to step out by myself after that crazy event that's happening, I will.
Okay, that's fine.
I'm not guaranteed i'm going out but i i would imagine that after having a couple drinks at barrett's party with
you know everybody that it should happen so we'll see um yeah sunday just relaxation man
you know how it is sunday's a day of rest it's an international break so we don't have a lot
of footy that is of interest to me this
weekend it's fine it's fine how's man you doing shit david they've lost nine of their first 18
games it's not good uh the ceo has just been relieved of his duties today is there 500
it's not good in soccer dude you can't make the playoffs at 500 okay they don't have playoffs i
don't know what i'm talking about oh man randy what do you get into you just drinking mead and
vibing this weekend or what hell yeah i do it is mead bottling day on uh on sunday for the
for the fall mead i'll bring it in for you uh friday there's talks about a squad dinner i don't
know about that gotta work on a painting for my niece.
And then I'm heading back home for Thanksgiving.
Oh, yeah.
You're out all next week.
We should probably announce right now that next week we will have no videos on our episodes
as Randy will be out all week.
We got it.
We're working Monday.
And is that it?
I don't know.
I haven't looked at our calendars.
My Wednesday is going to be heavy picking up stuff for Thanksgiving.
We're hosting for the first time.
Should I make another stew?
Oh, you're not leaving town?
No.
Word.
We don't want to leave this close to.
Oh, I got good news.
I got good news for people that have a lot of shit to do for the holidays.
We will not be recording on Wednesday.
Huge.
As much as I would like to, it's not very feasible right now.
My only question is about Tuesday.
Tuesday.
It's Tuesday, isn't it?
Because we famously do an episode on Tuesdays, but we'll see.
We'll do an episode.
We'll do a Patreon.
Let's do a Patreon episode Tuesday.
Let's do a YouTube show sometime.
I'll be getting back next Tuesday, and we will have Do You Know It on that day.
So I will be prepared. Well, that's exciting.
Maybe we'll put together a little special edition
Patreon episode to make
up for missing. We don't miss very many Patreon
episodes, but I will say we do usually miss one over
Thanksgiving week.
That's just how it is. Things will never be the same.
Okay.
Bye.