Circling Back - Carmen Electra & The Cereal Draft
Episode Date: May 18, 2022H Week rolls on which left us no choice but to talk about Carmen Electra’s pivot to OnlyFans, which we support because it’s always nice to see Girl Bosses winning. We also hash out the best cereal...s during our Cereal Draft, and touch on some potentially unhealthy things old people are doing. Oh, and This Weekend in Fun, obviously. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low as $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Purchase a Circling Back Candle: www.vellabox.com/circling-back Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (15:55) The Cereal Draft (40:00) Carmen Electra Did A Thing (53:13) Old People Be Acting Up Again (1:05:00) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors L’Oreal: https://rebrand.ly/LOreal_CirclingBack Mizzen and Main: www.mizzenandmain.com (CIRCLING for $35 off) Framebridge: www.framebridge.com (STEAM for 15% off) Hawthorne: www.hawthorne.co (CIRCLINGBACK for 10% off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
all right we're back circling back podcast presented by busy hard seltzer the only hard
seltzer with vitamin c and superfruit acerola in it horny week rolls on my name's will to freeze to my left david h bomb raw
wow man it's hotter than the gore daughters outside stop hey did you hear how mcdonald's
is officially leaving russia like they Like they're closing all their stores.
It initially just suspended it, correct?
So I was reading up on it on a website.
This website here is called vice.com.
I don't know if you guys are familiar.
Just reading up on it because that's interesting because a bunch of like –
so they're basically just turning them into McDonald's knockoffs.
Okay.
Interesting enough.
But I read this little note here.
It says,
Back when its closure was first announced,
a man handcuffed himself to a Moscow area McDonald's
saying the departure of the fast food giant was an act of hostility.
I get it.
I get it.
I do love them a Big Mac, I bet.
A crowd gathered.
Well, it looks like he did.
A crowd gathered and his police worked to free the man from the door.
And several people tried to talk the guy down from his protest.
They said, they will open in a month and a half, but under a different name, one person shouted.
That's not a good, like that doesn't have the flow to it.
McDougals or something like that.
What's the one from Coming to America?
I'm just trying to think of, I can't remember.
McDowell's
something like that what a fun time who who do you identify with more the dude chaining himself
to a mcdonald's or uh the guy from succession super gluing himself to a starbucks uh the
mcdonald's guy because breakfast is goaded that that's that's a lunch pail guy you know yeah my fear is that i identify more
with the dude who super glued himself to the starbucks but i want to identify more with
mcdonald's guy he just wants a cheap burger man and he wants he wants his mc he wants his
mcdonald's i don't i don't like that you automatically defaulted to him just wanting
a big mac like you can't underrate the nugs there no their nugs are the big macs are a mid-tier
burger i used to be a double
quarter pounder with cheese guy i would do a double quarter pounder with cheese and i do a
little sidecar six nugs look their fries are really good well i told you what happened the last time i
got mcdonald's fries no our flight got delayed out of houston and so we were like you know what
let's just rent a car drive back drop the car off at the at the airport and then just go home from there and so all i was looking for
on that drive home was just the golden arches i needed to see those things popping up over the
highway and we finally get to one we ordered 20 chicken nuggets and two large fries they put the
large fries in a bag of their own like just they didn't even put them in the cardboard container
they just gave us a giant bag of fries.
I finally get those sweet, sweet fries to my mouth and I take a bite of one.
They're actually pretty salty. They were unsalted.
What? They forgot to
salt the fries. It was devastating.
Man, we're salt bait when you need
them. Probably salting
my nachos. Yeah, he's fake salting
someone's nachos at a Vegas Golden Knights game.
What if the grains were just too or the granules were too tiny to see very fine
grains of salt yeah granules or grains what are you looking for same thing i don't know man what's
a grain well they say take it with a grain of salt there it is yeah they don't say granule
assault you stupid dumbass a small compact particle of a substance. I think both actually work. Okay. Okay.
Fuck.
Yeah, but like...
The GD son of a bitch.
Yeah, but you sound real.
You sound real like, oh, I'm a dude in STEM.
If you're like, yeah, I take that with a granule of salt.
Yeah, you're getting punched if you say that.
Yeah, you got major super glued to a Starbucks vibe.
You say that to Dick Saloon, you're going to take a pool cue over the hill.
Hold on, hold on.
I've got my Bunsen burner in the car can i do one shot of your finest tequila
with some granules of salt on the rim please darling the only place open is a dick salon
yeah you got major winnie the pooh and his tuxedo vibes instead of just being regular
winnie the pooh just no pants pants? Just chill out, dude.
No pants.
That Winnie the Pooh is funny.
Just a cummerbund?
Why do they have to call it a...
Why can't it just be called a cummerbund like everyone thinks?
Why does it actually have to be called a cummerbund?
It's not cumber?
I don't think so.
Is it?
Who named it?
No one actually pronounces or enunciates the B.
What a weird name for that garment.
Yeah, it's cummerbund.
Yeah. Horny week rolls on like that's unnecessary i used to be very anti-cummerbund and i think in recent years i've started to like the look more and more no no it's a good look yeah i used to
think it was kind of a dork ass look and now that i now when i see it now i'm like you know what i
think i might start mixing that in a little bit biggest negative with going with a cummerbund supposed to
a cumber is that you can't hit them with the suspendees you know that's true suspendees are
dope that's true which is what i opted for at my wedding as you guys know you were there i also
opted for suspenders with my tuxedo at the wedding i think if i could redo it like i think i'd give
more of a look over to Cumberbund.
I'm not sure if I would allow it to replace the spendies.
Oh, they're tight, man.
I actually wore the same suspenders and the same shoes weeks prior.
That reminds me,
I have to return the other suspenders I purchased there.
I wonder if there's a...
Those are yours now.
Why?
You don't need...
Get some change of pace suspenders in your repertoire.
Like 80 bucks, man.
I just don't, you know...
Maybe just return those.
I just won't return them, but it's a domain. It's far from here't you know maybe just return those return them but
it's a domain it's far from here you know yeah parking it's a whole thing if you go at the right
time it's not bad i just want to fight people whenever i drive up there hey when when you
are ready to intro me i have something i would like to offer up to our audience
just i'm trying to think of like a nickname for you right now
keep in mind it's h week yeah i know all right we got a little pancake we got dylan shivery aka
the h of spades okay all right well anyway i don't know anyway i mean remember it's you tried eight jump spades
remember the tony hawks pro skater love it go ahead do you have something yeah you can i have
the floor yeah go ahead he's doing usually when you intro somebody you let them speak as opposed
to just talk over me the whole time eight of spades what do you have to say remember the other
day when we were talking about which viral video we would choose to show the aliens um i have a late entry
and it is the dubai was lit video that which is an all-timer it gets underrated the only thing is
like the aliens would definitely go down to dubai and check it out that's that's that's where they
would go first can you imagine the aliens on those like four-wheelers in the dunes riding camels and shit like hashtagging the dude perfect
guys these dune buggies aren't sick i have too much dirt on my goggles i need windshield wipers
they made a little island out of sand can you imagine if their first exposure to animals
on our planet was like yo check, check out these camels.
They got water inside them.
Yeah.
They'd be like, what?
These buildings are freaking tall.
I think camels are fairly smart.
You know who's very intelligent?
Crows.
Are camels the ones that'll spit at you?
I spit at you.
Or is that a llama?
Yeah.
A Stolophosaurus.
Per my research, I've actually been researching this for a long time.
I just Googled, are camels smart?
It says they are highly intelligent and communicative.
They have a very involved social hierarchy that utilizes vocalizations and body language to communicate.
When teaching camels, they soak up information like giant sponges.
And water.
This is my impression of a camel spitting
i think will's is more accurate
they don't spit in the uh spittoons
all right no this is seriously my my impression of a camel spitting
his arms are heavy something something palms are sweaty how's the rest of the song go mom's
water in his hump already that's oh shit damn will's out here spinning yeah i was watching
aladdin the other day noted camel movie and they they have a disclaimer now ahead of these older
disney movies that say that they are not PC these days.
They haven't changed anything within the movies.
Wait, what is that? Does it say that?
Yeah, dude.
Some of this didn't age well.
Things were different in 1993.
Yo, they stunned us.
We haven't changed anything, but we just want to get it out there.
There should have been a disclaimer that said,
by the way, this movie is super mid
before you start it.
That's honestly one of your worst takes. Yeah, it's a, this movie is super mid before you start it. Honestly.
That's honestly one of your worst takes.
Yeah, it's a really bad take.
It's one of the best Disney movies.
The songs alone in that are some of the best.
The modern one with Will Smith is garbage.
Okay, don't.
I think it was that bad.
And you're just mad because you didn't know it was a musical.
You weren't ready for the song.
I wasn't ready for the song.
I mean, it's Aladdin.
Like, that's what they do.
You just hate everything Robin Williams does.
The last time I saw it, I was seven.
Like, I'm sorry.
You just hate everything Robin Williams does.
You're going to tell me Mork and Mindy wasn't good?
This movie wasn't released in 1982.
I don't want to disrespect Robin Williams more than I already have.
But he just didn't do much for me comedic-wise.
That's nice of you not to drag the name of someone who has passed.
Mrs. Doubtfire straight up is just a bad movie also very problematic it's not that problematic dude it's totally normal
it's totally normal to separate yourself from your wife and then infiltrate their home dressed
as an elderly person just to kidnap your kids every once in a while it's not that weird
i think you just relate
to rob blow in that movie you're the rob blow of that movie was rob low i was gonna say no that
was pierce dog basically the same guy though as i married somebody with a child wait no no you
just moved in you just you know you're you're doing the dive off the dive board. You're all tan.
And you're like, ooh, I got this hair.
It's all dark now.
I'm James Bond.
I use L'Oreal.
I'm Thomas Crown.
Yeah, baby.
I've never acted like that before.
I'm Thomas Crown. They didn't actually get married.
I don't know.
You know what I liked about Mrs. Doubtfire?
We can end it here.
They didn't have some story storybook ending where like sally
fields like you know what even though you had been dressing up like a british nanny and uh
just doing this whole scheme let's get back together they didn't do that it was just kind
of like hey you know what let's we will allow you to do visitation it ended on a high though
it did end on a high but it wasn't like because there's no way you're taking them back after that
she could have been like i need to get the cops here you this is really weird creepy you're also violating
like your custody order correct you know all kinds of stuff a number of problems yeah i just think he
probably wasn't paying the bills with his voiceover work you know like having a space like that in san
francisco that's a it's a high ticket area you had to bring in Pierce Brosnan to cover the mortgage every once in a while.
People like to talk about the home alone house.
Oh, what's the home alone house?
What does that guy do for a living?
Let's talk about that San Francisco home.
Wasn't Danny Tanner moving weight on the low, though?
Probably.
Probably.
Uncle Jesse was just one.
He was a made man.
That's why he lived in the attic.
He was pushing bricks. I don't want man that's why he lived in the attic he was pushing bricks
like look i don't want to shame uncle jesse for living in the attic but like how are you
going to live in the attic with your wife and two kids like that's a that's a little bit of space
the the warmest spot in the house that being said like if you got to cuddle up with aunt becky she
was a major overlook oversight during our horny draft. Yeah, I agree.
Yeah, she deserved
at least an honorable mention.
Think about when
that marine layer rolls in.
It's going right
through that attic.
Damn, are they putting
a new store there?
Mm-hmm.
Is that one still here?
Is there still that one
inside Congress?
Yeah, I feel like
I'd like marine layer
if I went in there.
I have a couple of items
from them.
Yeah, I got a pair of pants.
They're kind of comfy.
I don't wear them very often.
It's kind of got like throw on before you shower on vacation vibes when you go to like eat the big
breakfast you know before you shower yeah oh you go to you go to breakfast all stanky from the
night before yeah eat breakfast and you get clean yeah you get your comfies on it's a weird way to
you know i'm talking about though i mean kind of yeah you breakfast different than i do i'm a i'm
a shower before i even step foot outside guy.
On vacation, vacation's the one time that I will flex and not shower until later.
Especially if it's a pool day for your boy.
Well, you gotta shower after the pool before dinner.
Duh.
Okay.
Duh.
You don't wash your hair.
I don't wash my hair before dinner, though, because I need to have that texture from all
the pool and the ocean and stuff like that.
All right.
It's weird. You're all sweaty and shit. I know, but I like to have that texture from all the pool and the ocean and stuff like that. All right. It's weird.
You're all sweaty and shit.
I know, but I like to have my eyes on my hair at all times.
Not to gas you up too much, Dylan, but a lot of people have been talking about your hair as of late.
Really?
Yeah.
I'm insane about it.
Pierce Brosnan of Walsh.
Dude, can I just ask you a question?
Are you using L'Oreal Paris Men's Expert One Twist hair color?
I have used it exactly one time.
Yes, that's facts.
This is our first read for them since you've actually put it in your hair.
Can you take your hat off for this read, please?
I suppose that's acceptable.
I was present during the read that you guys did during Too Much Dip,
and I just wanted to talk about your hair.
I mean, you look at least three years younger and at most
five years younger than you did before you did this do you mean that yes okay um i don't feel
like i look that much young but i feel like i've i'm like a little bit more buttoned up like sharp
you look good like i'm ready to present to a you know a board meeting or something you know that's
what i feel like well if you guys aren't familiar with this stuff this stuff offers natural
undetectable gray coverage it's made for men only takes about five minutes i mean you can
speak to the entire process dylan yes i did it um i've never dyed my hair before ever and i did it
took me five minutes it's a very simple process uh smells good even you know like you can just
it's just it's just a it's a fun little experience smells good
it's so easy five minutes go by you wash it out of your hair take a little shower and boom
your grays are just gone but there's it's just a one it's one tube right one two yeah you use it
and you dispose of it um it's it's shockingly easy to use um Do you crack it like a beer can?
There's a little plastic tab out of the top,
and you just crack it.
Hell yeah.
Toss that tab away.
Let's go.
And then you're ready to squeeze and squirt and die.
Okay.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
You know Jamie Lannister endorses this product?
Have you seen that?
Well, that's a beautiful man.
With a beautiful hair.
Yeah. A lot of hair.
He can also handle that sword, if you know what i'm saying all right i mean this stuff this stuff lasts up to six weeks you got a lot you got a lot going on right now i don't know that
i'm getting some compliments dog yeah of course you are you look great wow thank you will like
it's not some noticeable like jarring difference like it's a very natural thing i just feel like
i'm talking to the dylan of old or the dylan of young i've always wondered how i was gonna look
with uh with no grays and now i know and i'm i'm pretty pleased with the outcome oh wait which one
you guys married into the young family oh whoa okay if you guys are looking for this for yourself
the product is an all-in-one bottle it's never been done before with hair color there's no mixing
or multiple formula tubes it's available online at amazon and walmart or in stores at walmart
near the razors if you guys are interested head to the description of this episode where we've
tossed a link in there go check it out yesterday we did something big we did our dad pod on patreon
and uh it started to bring up some uh some takes We started talking about children's cereals.
Those pods are really good.
Let me throw that in there.
We were all over the map, but it all somehow related to what the theme of the podcast was.
Yeah.
Some of our best.
We even talked dog dads.
We did.
That was a good pod.
Parks is a dog.
That was a real good pod.
That episode yesterday had that dog in it.
He didn't get it from you, man.
Are you kidding?
You don't got that dog in it.
Are you freaking serious?
You can say, just because we're talking about your son doesn't mean you can't say the F-word.
Are you flipping serious?
Yeah.
No.
I don't care.
Man, I'm going to, like, no offense, I'm going to stomp y'all on this draft.
Absolutely embarrass you.
Oh, God.
It's going to be like the time Dave chose Blanche Devereaux over Carmen Electra. offense i'm gonna stomp y'all in this draft absolutely embarrass you oh god it's gonna be
like the time dave chose uh blanche devereaux over carmen electra come and lecture over a lot of
people actually yeah i mean any other woman in the world if i could read draft i'm taking it becky
i'm putting that out there right now i don't hate it i don't hate it when that's the one that i saw
in the comments where i was just like fuck fuck. I've done younger me wrong.
Did Tiffany Amortheusen go number one overall?
Yeah, but I didn't draft Tiffany Amortheusen.
I drafted Kelly Kapowski.
That's fine.
I've been calling her Kelly Kablamski lately.
Let's draft some fucking serials.
That was the pick.
That was everybody's crush i
know i know the fact that zach got his head turned by that nurse is like just like she was don't get
me wrong like a baddie she was bad but like dude you got to know what you got at home dog you got
kelly kapowski you got the head cheerleader also the uh the record label lady who is probably a decade older than him she she also uh caught his
eye that's a baddie kelly kapowski also posed not not like nude nude but like this shirt yeah
see very see-through shirt that was also a top five google phrase of mine in my adolescence
that photo i can remember whose computer and in what room i was looking at that
photo on it was my buddy clayton down the street and his parents his parents little
guest i remember being just in total shock minutes to see it that that kelly kapowski
showed nipple i was like i can't believe i'm about to see kelly kapowski's nips on yeah you
felt like you were it was holy grail yeah exactly Yeah, exactly. I feel like I forbidden fruit.
I feel like I just,
I just zoned out for five seconds and things got mega age.
I mean, it's, you know, a week it is right.
Damn.
What did like Kapowski like, like basically dumped him out.
Dude.
Chill.
I can't.
Can we talk cereal?
Oh yeah.
This is about cereal.
So we talked to cereal yesterday and it turned out that Dylan obviously had some really trash
takes.
So we had no other choice but to expose those trash takes.
Great takes.
No.
You started slandering the name of Raisin Bran Crunch.
No one's doing that.
No.
I love Raisin Bran Crunch.
I just pointed out that it has mega sugar in it.
And Dave, as a 37-year-old man, should watch the sugar intake.
I think Dave, as a 37-year-old man, should be able to eat whatever the hell think, Dave, as a 37-year-old man, you should be able to eat whatever the hell he wants.
He should.
I'm an adult.
This is the adult draft.
I'm looking out for my friend.
It's a silent killer.
People know that.
You'd be disgusted
if you saw how much sugar I had this morning.
I've been eating a ton of fruit.
Shout out, Shitto.
I made a smoothie this morning.
I love it.
Damn, you've been eating those kiwis
that make you shit?
My smoothie had a whole banana.
Do they?
A whole banana.
Kiwis will keep you ragged, dog.
I need to invest.
If you want to talk to my son and my partner, he's deep in the kiwi game lately.
I'll talk to him.
Does that mean he's just been-
I ate your kiwi?
Yes.
Mondo's from the Fritz, man.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I had a lot of sugar this morning, man, in my smoothie.
Not your boy, dude.
I'm intermittent fasting right now.
I got some sugar.
That's when you fast intermittently.
Yeah, but you can still eat sugar during your eating window.
Yeah.
Dude, you know I eat a lot of candy.
I don't know that.
Do you really intermittent fast every day?
Unintentionally, yeah.
Not every day.
You need to be more obnoxious about it.
Sometimes that when I'm like feeding Fritz, you know, if I got some torch ass yogurt that i'm feeding him i gotta eat i gotta
take a couple bites of that yogi don't don't say some girt yeah dude i'm absolutely twisted off
some girt right now yeah dude i'll eat some yogurt i'll eat some yogs are you doing skirgert still
yeah for sure dude well my mom used to toss in those gogurts back in the day in my lunch bag
sometimes and i was never really a fan of those because they always got a little too warm for me
i like my yogurt cold so by the time lunch break hit i was just like yeah eating warm ass yogurt
sometimes we'll throw those in the freezer by the time parks gets gets it out for lunch it's like
chilled would they be i feel like those would be really good frozen that too yogurt pops that's
a thing sure you know i like those yogurt pops it must be gert dare to pop
let's draft some fucking cereals randy do you have a number in minds for us to choose our
drafting order all right on the count of three we're all going to shout out a number between one and ten closest person to it gets to draft all right three two one nine seven i said two so i'm second dave's first
dylan's second and i'm last
no pressure dave you know i think if you've listened to this podcast over the last few years,
you probably have a thought about what might go first in this overall draft.
You can do grape nuts, aren't you?
Corn nuts!
You can do grape nuts.
Look at you.
Would you acknowledge what he did?
I know. I'm trying to.
Dude, I have hella people for each other.
They're like, I can't eat corn nuts the same anymore.
I get too excited.
Dude, I saw him the other day at the bread basket place,
and I thought, maybe I should buy these for Will.
You probably wouldn't have eaten them.
Corn nuts.
Stop saying that.
I'm addicted to Pirate's Booty right now.
That's my snack of choice.
So my criteria when creating the draft, my draft board,
is not necessarily drafting for need, drafting the best cereal available.
Criteria for best cereal available is texture, taste, milk.
Milk meaning what does it do to the milk when I'm done with the actual cereal?
That's something you have to factor in.
You're going Cocoa Puffs first.
Yo, that's big facts.
You're going Cocoa Puffs.
With the first pick in the cereal draft, I am going Fruity Pebbles.
What?
Okay.
Take it, dude.
That's not even close to the top of your boys' list.
Brett is not happy.
They just hit the nay-nay.
Dude, stop hitting the nay- nay nay uh that's not a bad
pick not a bad pick is there was another one i had in mind and i guarantee it goes second but
the what it does to the milk is just different it's different you remember that pre-workout i
had not so long ago six to ten months ago, that had Fruity Pebbles in it.
Do you remember that?
Or maybe it was a protein.
Yeah, I remember this.
It's a protein.
I remember this. It sounds fantastic.
The flavor was Fruity Pebbles.
I thought, oh, it's going to taste like Fruity Pebbles.
And it did, but mostly because it had actual Fruity Pebbles in it.
It was wild.
Anyway, here's my criteria.
If I have all the cereals lined up in front of 10-year-old me,
which one do I want to devour first right that's my criteria 40 pills is a good one day that might be my top three it might be
but it's not my number one my number one is honey nut cheerios the goat cereal period point blank
that's a good pick and that's going to be popular. I mean, it's the only pick.
That's my number one overall.
It's a perfect cereal.
I thought about trading up to get it, but I couldn't get there.
We just didn't meet.
We couldn't meet in the middle anywhere.
It would have taken your next three picks to grab Monomoto.
Yeah, and so I'm going to have to go down the list.
Unfortunately, as I said, Honey Nut Cheerios is my favorite.
I don't have a criteria for this.
You have two picks here, remember do i do with my first pick i'm also going to go with the taste
texture and milk scenario for dave for my first pick which is why i have no other choice but to
absolutely stan cinnamon toast crunch let's fucking go let's eat some cinnamon toast crunch and let's
mob with the boys i don't hate it i mean i it's not something my parents bought very often as a child
but it's something that my friend always had at his house that i would sneak bowls of and i'm not
going to feel bad about that only kind of bowls i sneak is that sticky shit you don't have to sneak
those dude like it's kind of decriminalized in austin these days like you just do it dude yeah
it's pretty regular i was just i was just straight burning those bowls man what not like that more
like this you were smoking bowls of cereal.
No, that sticky weed.
Yeah.
And then I would get munchies and I would just go to town.
With the fourth overall pick and my second overall pick in this draft.
Don't you do it.
Don't you pick my shit.
I'm picking something that, like, you know, it's near and dear to my heart.
And I don't think you're going to be upset about what I'm about to pick here, Dylan.
These things are magically delicious.
And I have to go with me lucky charms.
I love the way that the milk breaks down the artificial marshmallows
and turns them into these little slimy slugs of goodness.
A piece of rubber that you're eating.
Lucky charms are not even on my list, and I'll tell you why.
The texture of the marshmallow when you bite into them
ruin the cereal for me got a like it was like it's like biting into like wet chalk almost i
couldn't do it wet chalk shut up bitch okay okay yeah i respect your decision even though it's not
a good one well what's what what's what's better than what I just said? For my second round pick, I'm doing Cap'n Crunch.
Take it.
Always scrapes up the roof of your mouth.
It was fucking bomb.
I think I might have been unique in that I didn't have Cap'n Crunch ever as a kid.
It's not Cap'n, it's Cap'n.
That's what I said.
Cap'n.
I'm not Cap'n right now.
Just FYI.
It wasn't something that we ever had around.
And it's not something any of my friends ever had.
So it was never something that I got severely exposed to.
It wasn't a mainstay in my household growing up at all.
But every now and then I get to treat myself to it.
And it was an absolute delight.
I loved it.
So just the original.
Not the...
No, there was like a peanut butter cap.
There was a peanut butter.
That was the one I was in on.
It's also on my list. I didn't... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... You can't choose two cereals. One would was like a peanut butter category. There was a peanut butter. That was the one I was in on. That was also one I lost.
I didn't – I'm sorry.
You can't choose two cereals and one would be in the peanut butter version.
Oh, you can't?
Oh, you know I'm a peanut butter boy.
I just fear that some people might say that you're a one-trick pony.
You know I love my PB.
You can't take two running backs in the first round, dog.
That's just a waste of picks.
I can't.
What? Is it me? Yeah. You get you get two here well yeah oh this is dangerous i feel like we got some i feel like this is a top heavy draft this is where dave shoots from the hip okay you're going apple jacks
aren't you with my second pick stop looking at my notes you ding dong i'm not i can just see
your google imaging stuff i want well yeah because like half of mine are off the board now which i should have seen
coming but here we are my second pick first pick was fruity pebbles second pick cocoa pebbles
cocoa pebbles dude my man's only eating pebbles you want pebbles over puffs little pebble
yes they call you little pebble yeah why wait is that in the same man's only eating pebbles these days. You want pebbles over puffs? Little pebble. Yes.
They call you little pebble?
Yeah.
Why?
Wait, is that in the same family as Fruity Pebbles?
Same maker?
Okay.
I don't think I've ever had that.
So if you are, I think it is the goaded chocolate cereal.
Now, chocolate cereals are inherently like.
If I'm in the cocoa section of the cereal aisle, I'm going puffs.
That's just who I am.
See, I know.
I knew there was going to be some controversy.
If you're a real chocolate head like Dave over here, you know that the chocolate pebbles are much more chocolatey tasting than your cocoa pebbles.
How many picks are we doing?
Or cocoa, whatever.
How many picks are we doing?
Four, dude.
That's how we roll here.
Okay.
We could do more, but then I'd have to redo the template that I use in order to promote this.
Let's do four.
That takes me a really long time.
Then I'll do my honorable munchies at the end.
Or in this case, honorable munchies.
People are probably fast forwarding to hear those.
I need to hear that.
What's next, dude?
Hold on.
I'm looking up Cocoa Pebbles.
Oh, yeah.
Dave's got two picks.
Okay.
Cocoa Pebbles.
I see now.
Yeah.
Isn't that box?
The Pebbles box is our go-to.
Flintstones on the box, man.
Yeah.
Flintstones just brings back great
memories too i don't support fred flint i'm still going i canceled him a long time ago yeah is there
the disclaimer the same disclaimer that hey this ain't pc and i'm still going puffs dog but i
respect your shit man all right okay i mean wilma flintstone was kind of bad though she was a baddie
that red hair with the white dress and the pearl necklace.
Are you kidding me?
You love those redheads, man.
Damn, I might take her in my next childhood crush draft.
What's next, David?
My next cereal is Honey Smackin' Good.
Of course, I'm talking Honey Smacks.
Not your regular smacks the honey smacks it's honey smacking good dylan honey smacks sweetened honey flavored puffed wheat cereal
dave's doing deep cuts right now yeah you are doing deep cuts i respect that serial hipster
honey smash what the oh with the frog that frog's. Dude, that frog hit him with it. Dylan's about to draft a box of Kashi.
That wasn't even around when I was a kid.
I thought Kashi was so healthy in college.
He probably was.
Oh, no, yeah.
There's sugar in it.
No, the Kellogg's frog, dude, the Honey Smacks frog,
his hat's on sideways.
He is tight.
He's kind of edgy.
He's tight.
Well, that is a bad pick.
I do respect it like he's
trying to stay up late and watch jackass okay i'm i'm staring at a few here i got two picks left
right i could go any number of ways right now but i'm gonna grab something off the board that
that deserves to go in the third round if not sooner and that's cocoa puffs have to do it the number one like turn the bowl up cereal
there is at the end of you know to drink all that milk that's number one cereal in that category
they look too much like little deer turds wow dude you're eating deer turds david shut up dude
it's like oh i'm going sea puffs man oh don't call them, oh. I'm going sea puffs, man. Don't call them sea puffs.
I'm going sea puffs.
I think your boy had something fall into his lap that I didn't see going this far.
And I'm very happy about it.
I prefer this cereal to sit in the bowl for a couple minutes before I dive in.
I already know what this is.
I like the crunch, but at the same time, I like it when it gets a little soggy.
Stop.
And at the end of the day
all i have to say about these is that they're great oh frosted flakes no that ain't it frost
my flakes player that is a mid frost my flakes great marketing campaign mid cereal dylan used to like always skip plans because he was never mind
we called him the frosted flake what are you doing just frosted up dude
dylan's like oh it was a cocaine joke dylan used to walk in he's like yeah you see the forecast
tonight it's looking a little frosty out there like dude it's not yeah because i was drinking
frosty boys yeah dude it's fucking frosty out here.
You guys feel that?
A little frosty.
Oh, you get another pick, dog.
The next one I'm going with is something my parents refused to buy me, which I respect
in hindsight.
They bought you all these other ones, though.
Fruit Loops.
No, I already went on record saying that my parents were not noted Cinnamon Toast Crunch
people.
The main cereals that we kept in our rotation as a child,
Honey Nut Cheerios always, Special K, Rice Krispies, Frosted Flakes. Those were the cereals
in our place. So we didn't have the big sugar all the time. But for this one, I am going big sugar.
I'm taking something that I don't normally eat and I don't normally choose. But when I could
get to my boy's house and open up that cabinet and get this box out of there, you know I was
eating good. And that's why I have to go with one of the naughtiest cereals in the game make your pick
reese's poops oh man okay no i i'm sorry well these this cereal i was so horny when it came out
but it didn't deliver underwhelmed please I'm a day one Reese's guy.
Nah, dude.
Where are my Reese heads at?
I say Reese's.
It is Reese's.
That's how it's technically pronounced.
I don't know why I said Reese's.
I hate that. It's because of Reese's feces.
Okay.
Reese's feces.
That's how bad that sounds.
You know, that's not facts.
Yeah, that's right.
I can't trash your pigs.
I don't know if I'm that familiar with these.
I've had them, surely, but I can't imagine how they taste right now.
I'm not making an old joke about you, Dylan,
but I think by the time that Reese's Puffs were in the mainstream,
I think you were probably too old to be eating cereal every morning.
That's a great point.
It's pretty rude.
I think it hit me in stride, whereas for you,
you probably were just like, get out of here, Mom.
I don't want breakfast.
Okay. Go out of here. I have one i have one no i'm still getting dressed i have one pick left and i'm staring at a list of seven
that i could potentially choose from they're all good okay and this is gonna be a very tough pick
for me you're picking i know what you're picking here no you don't yeah i do what i'm just gonna
start typing i'll type i'll type and then i'll tell dylan or then i'll
have dave read if i was right or not it's not wheaties that's what you're gonna it's not what
i was gonna write oh this is gonna be tough are you doing shredded shredded mini wheat
david stop frosted mini i wouldn't hate you if you did frosted mini wheats right now i said
mini wheats were not very good they were better than wheaties yeah okay i'll give you that we just suck wheaties you had to put like all the fruit on
fruit and sugar yeah just dumping blueberries oh man slicing up if you were like add sugar to your
seal guy kid you were like your parents like it was not good that's me dog it was not look how i
turned out dude i used i used to add a hell of a banana to my uh shut up what's your pick what's your pick can i tell you what i'm
choosing between sure go ahead man um right now i have pops rice krispies fruit loops peanut
butter crunch as my i'm picking between those four don't you dare pick rice krispies here that
is such a mid that's such a mid thing to pick.
Their texture is amazing.
Is that the chuggiest thing he could pick?
Snapcrackle, Pop, are you kidding?
You could hear them.
They got canceled too.
What other cereal can you hear?
Didn't they eventually take the Rice Krispie Treat and say,
hey, we're going to just take these treats and make them a Rice Krispie Treat cereal?
So Snapcrackle and Pop, they actually got caught.
They got popped, no pun intended.
They actually snuck into a morgue and they found some dude's head and then never mind what are you talking about what have you guys seen this better call sol show
this is will's doing the show okay what are you picking oh this is this is going to be tough. I'm going to go with peanut butter crunch.
And I picked two from the Cap'n Crunch family.
I understand that.
These cannot be ignored.
These cannot be ignored, Will.
Okay.
Take it.
Big ups to Rice Krispies and Pops.
Fruit Loops.
Damn.
Some good cereals on the board, Dave.
Stop looking at my screen.
This is it, Dave.
I have no picks left, my man.
This is a deep draft.
Yeah, to you.
This is getting Brady at the end of the fifth right now for you, Dave.
It's a deep-ass draft.
I don't think it's like that at all.
It's not.
There's only four rounds of this draft.
I'm just looking to get somebody who can contribute on special teams at this point.
So who are you picking?
You're going Apple, Dave.
I can't believe what I'm seeing. I can't believe what I'm seeing.
I can't believe I'm seeing.
One of my faves.
Some people may not have even heard of this.
This is a texture pick, how it sits on your palate.
If you say juxtaposition, I swear I'm leaving.
I'm walking out of the studio.
And I think this is just going to round out a strong drive class from uh your boy little
pebble over here kicks k-i-x like what's even their bit i really don't know but they're just
really really good it's kid tested parent approved just seven ingredients four grams of sugar you're
a deep cut guy.
Good source of fiber.
As you know, I do struggle with diverticulitis.
Hey, man, this pick stinks, Dave.
Hey, Dylan, man.
You stink.
You had Fruit Loops staring you in the face and you picked kicks.
You had pops knocking on your door.
Fruity Pebbles scratches that itch.
Little Pebble, come here.
Fruity Pebbles, they deserve better than what we gave them today.
I will also say that...
Fruity Pebbles is not my overall pick.
I meant, sorry, Fruit Loops.
Right.
I meant Fruit Loops.
They deserve a spot in this league.
Honestly, that might have been a miss from me.
I almost picked them.
I'm a big fan.
You picked Captain Crunch over Fruit Loops.
Don't come at me
my my my my ones that are left off the board right now are golden grams oh yeah really good
underrated underrated love them uh apple jacks apple jacks were good waffle crisp you guys ever
fucked with waffle crisp i definitely i definitely had like every cereal at some point.
Wow.
That's my bragging montage.
Here are my six honorable mentions.
Pops, Rice Krispies, Fruit Loops, Cheerios, Apple Jacks, Raisin Bran Crunch.
No, stop trying to act like you ride for Raisin Bran Crunch. Get it off your list.
Get it off your list.
You slandered it too much.
As a child, they were great.
Now they have too much show.
You slandered it too much. As a child, they were great. Now they have too much show. You slandered it too much.
No, I love them.
Please.
I used to eat regular Raisin Bran.
Whoa.
Dude, you're different.
I know.
Before crunch was even a thing, dog.
Yeah, I did too.
My mom did keep that.
That was a mix-in cereal, and I never got that excited over it.
They were good.
You know what I'm really craving right now is being at a decent hotel that has a complimentary breakfast and they just have a full cereal bar but like i
wish that they just i hate the little boxes because it's about one third of the amount of
cereal that i actually need oh i i grabbed four of them yeah you need i need them all you know
what else i need all of my friends over at hawthorne your hair and your skin are unique
but finding men's personal care products that work for you can be like searching for a needle in a haystack.
If you've ever done that, you know it's incredibly difficult.
But with Hawthorne, all you have to do is take a short quiz
to look, feel, and smell your best.
Hawthorne is a premium grooming brand
that tailors your personal care routine to your unique profile.
All you have to do is first you take their quiz.
They ask you a bunch of questions.
What's your current routine looking like?
What's your cocktail of choice? What's your current routine looking like? Like, what's your cocktail of choice?
What's your favorite cereal?
Yeah.
Maybe.
They just ask you a bunch of really personal questions,
and it spits out a bunch of really good results
that just are things that are tailored to what you want.
It's an easy quiz.
It takes hardly any time at all.
And at the end, I got the essentials bundle
with all the products tailored to my body type and lifestyle.
I got body wash.
I got shampoo.
Your boy got some aluminum-free deodorant, facial creams, everything, the whole gamut.
Yo, I hit myself with that cologne.
Oh, look out.
Yeah, it smells fantastic, dude.
Well, they've seen two of them.
I prefer the play.
Sometimes I go with both.
I go work and play.
That's bad boy shit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Hawthorne takes the risk out of shopping for personal care by giving you free shipping on your order and your returns.
If you don't like their products,
they'll even retailer them to you based on your feedback.
With high quality self-care products
tailored specifically to your needs from Hawthorne,
looking your best has never been easier.
Go and take Hawthorne's quiz today
and get started on your personalized self-care routine by going to hawthorne.co best has never been easier. Go and take Hawthorne's quiz today and get started on your personalized
self-care routine by going to Hawthorne.co and use promo code circling back
to get 10% off of your first purchase.
That's H-A-W-T-H-O-R-N-E.co promo code circling back Hawthorne.co
promo code circling back.
We've got some extremely horny news.
Do tell.
I think you should be the one to intro this one, Mr. Google Search.
Interestingly, we were just talking about this young,
well, I guess this lady.
Carmen Electra has joined OnlyFans at the age of 50.
I like this move for her.
And by the way, she still has her fastball.
I like that.
Have you subscribed? I don't know how to use OnlyFans, but no, I'm not going to subscribe.
That's too horny for me.
It's horny Patreon.
No, I know what it is.
I just am not familiar with it.
It's only for fans.
So I might call it Batreon.
B-A-T-E.
Emphasis on that part.
I had a restaurant that's all outdoor seating like an all outdoor covered
patio and there's no air conditioning there and we only have fans and they made us shut it down
because it was called only fans hey speaking of fans we we got into this office and the prior
tenants left two very nice industrial fans like like probably very expensive fans and like neither
of them worked.
Yeah.
I just left them here.
The other one didn't work either?
I put it in that storage closet.
I figured it didn't
because it's not here anymore.
I put it in that closet.
Maybe it did.
Yeah, the real big nice one
definitely didn't work.
That one was dope.
Tried to bring it to
Lil Man's first birthday party.
It didn't work.
So are you going to subscribe, Dylan?
Is this the one thing
that could get you in?
If I were to
stick a toe into the OnlyFans world.
Jeez.
Put a toe.
Stop.
It's the same.
You could probably make a lot of OnlyFans if you're photographing your toes.
This would be my time.
I would check it out.
It's Carmen Electra.
You know she's not going to do anything too wild?
Because my only concern is I hope she doesn't need, I hope she's not hurting for money. wild because like my only concern is like i hope
she doesn't need i hope she's not hurting that's a good call that's a good call because what she
chooses to do and how she tries to make money or does make money i guess that has nothing to do
with me go for it she was i just don't i hope you're not doing this like reluctantly she was
different y'all know that like i prefer to girl bosses winning. If the options are out there to see them losing or winning,
I'm always going to pick winning.
And I think it's a big dub for her that she didn't start OnlyFans at age 49.
I think doing it at age 50 just has that great marketing angle to it.
Dylan, you got a few years, man.
Yeah.
You may want to ride that same wave.
Want me to get on OnlyFans?
What if we're having trouble
within the company of making ends meet?
What if things just stop working out?
What if you get us canceled for some random reason?
And the only way that we can
start paying ourselves and our employees is
if you start selling your feet pics on
OnlyFans. Would you do that? I would do it to keep this
company afloat, yeah. So when people
sell their feet pics, do they do it in
different poses?
It's one big toe up or one maybe in a flip-flop like how do people because i'm just trying to think about how you diversify your
yeah foot portfolio i don't know like do you like do do people like tan their feet in order
to make them look better is there like a face tune for feet i i don't know and i don't know the answers
to any of these questions yeah he used to be an in sync i wouldn't uh foot tone okay dave come on
dude that sucked yeah that was bad that was really shitty that was a reach i'm a piece of shit
what are there any are there any notable like carmen electra is someone that we all knew who
was younger no so are there any other notable people are there any notable – like Carmen Electra is someone that we all knew who was younger. No, so are there any other notable people – are there any notable men, male celebrities,
like maybe heartthrobs from back in the day that have joined OnlyFans?
I don't know if there's any heartthrobs on there.
Okay.
There's a lot of heartthrobs on there.
What's the ratio of women to men on OnlyFans?
I think it's probably – I don't know.
Nine to one?
I don't know.
I don't know. 9-1? I don't know. I don't know.
If there are any backers out there that are ladies,
let us know if y'all have an OnlyFans.
Not if you personally have an OnlyFans.
Let us know if you subscribe to any male OnlyFans
for dudes that were maybe on Saved by the Bell
or California Dreams or something.
Okay, there's some names.
Like who?
Dan Cortez?
R&B singer mario mario who else i think cole campbell really check out cole campbell tyler posey who's tyler posey
more like tyler poser it's uh buster's brother i mean it might is he a hall of famer yeah probably i think so
plays in a big market you know that is he's baseball type he's a young looking guy
no relation to parker posey oh he was uh scott mccall on an mtv series teen wolf
didn't watch that randy do you watch teen wolf no want the wolf. I just can't give it to them.
Yeah, you remember when Holly Saunders, if you remember her,
she was a reporter.
She has rebranded.
Golf reporter.
And then just one day, it's just like, oh, OnlyFans.
Is she still dating Vegas Dave?
I don't think so.
Her pivot to what she's doing now is pretty shocking.
I feel like her DMs at one point before she pivoted
were just a bunch of PGA Tour pros
just shooting their shot after she interviewed them on camera.
I bet that's pretty accurate.
She looks like she works out a lot.
Why don't they just have like...
Oh, another person I forgot during our draft. Did you watch Hang Time? Yeah. Hang Time. it's pretty accurate she looks like she works out a lot why don't they just have like oh another
person i forgot during our draft did you watch a hang time yeah hang time uh i think her name was
like danielle trichel or something like that she was she was the goat or not the goat but
we overlooked her as well hang time was a great show hang time oh okay what was it danielle
dutcher yeah that's it not daniel not not the other one that i said i
was totally off on that they had a big cast when you look back on it dude they had reggie theus
no one's getting him as their their basketball coach bill foley saunders now is a wild scene man
i mean what if what if wash media goes down and then Dylan like you, you have the same pivot as Holly Saunders.
You just like start like waxing your entire body.
You work out a lot like more than you did during shreddy wedding season.
You get like hair plugs.
Just mad hot.
Yeah.
Hair plugs.
You heard him.
What?
You heard that?
Are you saying I'm not thinning that bad?
No, I'm just saying like I'm just trying to think.
I heard you.
You just get a bunch of plastic surgery.
You get your cheekbones all lifted.
You get that jawline surgery.
You're just pointing out all my imperfections.
No, I'm not pointing out your imperfections.
I'm just trying to think of things that people would get in order to try to make themselves look hotter even if it doesn't work.
You have your head shrunk a little bit.
Yeah.
You get shoulder implants so you don't have weak shoulders anymore.
Yeah, I get it, man.
Calf implants.
Right.
You get a BBL, dude.
Dude, the goaded MTV reality docuseries, whatever it was, was True Life,
and it was the guy who got the calf implants.
Oh, my God.
He's on the beach at the end, and he's so happy with it.
No.
And they do look good.
He says, like, now I'm perfect. He said, I'm the perfect man. And he's right. beach at the end and he's so happy with it and they do look good he says like now i'm perfect he said i'm the perfect man and he's right he was good looking it wasn't perfect
i like true life i'm getting married where the the limo didn't show up on time i'm gonna gut you
like the fucking pig that you are that guy holy shit somehow not the cheese balls guy different
different guy from the northeast like what if he did what if
he actually gutted him over that oh good get saying you're gonna get gut okay i'm not bringing
the limo once the term or hey i'm gonna kill you that's different i'm saying you're gonna gut me
like a fish i'm calling my boss like yo i'm late to this i'm not getting paid enough and he says
he's gonna gut me i'm just not gonna show up up. Like a fish. Is that okay? Like a fish. Yeah, you got to holler at an Uber dog.
I'm headed back to HQ right now.
Is it kind of shocking that we haven't gotten any documentary series on old MTV stuff?
I would love to see a Netflix docuseries on MTV Spring Break or a docuseries on Singled
Out and all those shows kind of thing.
I feel like that's ripe for the taking right now.
I had a Carmen Electra question back speaking of Singled Out.
Did she ever host Singled Out after Jenny McCarthy?
I don't know if it was after, but she was definitely a part of it.
Okay.
The debate in the mid-90s, if you were in my demographic, probably yours too, Will.
McCarthy versus Electra.
That was the...
It was Electra.
That was Jordan LeBron.
I was an Elect guy obviously who by the way named by prince there was also the there was also the
the controversy of which heidi from tool time home improvement because they had pam anderson
then they had the new heidi and i like the new look the new look heidi like i had a big crush
on her as well it was always pam i've started doing things uh around the house that
are a little tim taylor-y in front of fritz and he absolutely loves it yeah i start grunting around
him like and then sometimes i'll walk into the room sometimes i'll walk out of the room to go
do something walk back in with my shirt off and just start pounding my chest going you wear chunky
uh like michigan or detroit sweaters or sweatshirts you
know i do random like michigan tech or whatever like didn't he yo shout out to houghton he would
he would come out with some some really random crew necks yeah i'd be like why are you wearing
an albion college crew neck like no one cares about isn't that crazy that like right now like
our kids think we're like the strongest dudes in the world. Yeah. Oh, do my...
This guy...
My dad can beat up your dad is the ultimate argument.
Will walks in just beating his chest.
His son's like...
He thinks his dad's alpha right now.
Whenever I do that...
Bad day for somebody.
Whenever I start beating my chest like I do,
Fritz just starts going...
He loves it.
He absolutely loves it.
Carmen.
I saw you. Why do you have your credit card out right now why are you typing so fast honestly like this is this would be if i could pick like which
of my childhood crushes would join only fans she'd be my first overall pick like this would
be perfect for me if i were inclined to hop onto OnlyFans. A good bet payoff would be you have to start at OnlyFans.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
I have to profit.
I wonder how much it costs.
That'd be a great fantasy football payoff that you have to start the OnlyFans,
and then the entire league splits the profits.
And they get to tell you what to post.
They get to tell you what to post.
Within reason.
You get to sign off on approval for the first five posts oh when you said earlier you said start
only fans i i thought you were saying join only fans like that's why i said oh no no that's i i i
no i'm talking about you have to go start your own i got it now yeah you get it you get it
hey can i wish her well honestly kind of a free ad read that we just did for if anybody wants to
slide me a login like dms are open there's got to be a different way just saying dog
dude she made me the man i am today you can't just you can't be asking our listeners for a
login to their only fan so you can look carmen electric yeah that's like that's you're scraping
the bottom of the barrel right now that's like i's actually getting it oh man we all know of a guy who probably probably has one i'm going to only
fans.com for the first time ever right now well while you do that dylan let me tell you about a
new amazing service that i found called frame bridge frame bridge makes it super easy and
affordable to frame your favorite things from art prints to posters to travel photos sitting on your
phone and with father's day right around the corner, FrameBridge makes the perfect gift.
In fact, select gifts shipped next day.
Can you imagine not giving your dad a framed photo of you
and like maybe your son, Dylan?
Like how nice would that be for Father's Day?
It always plays.
And it's easy.
I've been loving FrameBridge for years now.
I was happy to have them on as a sponsor.
All you have to do is go to FrameBridge.com, upload your photo,
or they can even send you packaging to safely mail in your physical pieces. You can preview them online in
dozens of frame styles and gallery wall layouts, and then choose your favorite or get free
recommendations from their talented designers. If you're in New York, DC, Atlanta, Philly, Boston,
or Chicago, you can even go into their store and work with a designer in person. Once you do that,
the free previews are great. You can see what it looks like on the wall. You can choose different
mattings, different finishes for the actual frame itself.
If you've got an old jersey that you need framed, you can just send that right in and
they'll put it in a nice little frame for you.
I got a Nick Lindstrom jersey that I won during that playoff beard contest that just needs
to get off the hanger in my closet.
Maybe we'll just frame that Arby's polo.
Should we sign it and frame it?
Can I bring that to the PGA championship this weekend and wear it?
Do you want to?
Maybe.
Yeah,
you can.
T-Man and I'll be there.
We can do content.
Oh yeah.
He's going to be there.
Instead of the hundreds that you'd pay at a framing store,
their prices are at start at $39 and are all,
and all shipping is free.
Plus our listeners can get 15% off their first order at frame bridge.com.
When they use our promo code steam. So get started today, their first order at FrameBridge.com. They use our promo code STEAM.
So get started today.
Frame your photos or send someone the perfect gift.
Go to FrameBridge.com.
Use promo code STEAM to save an additional 15% off your first order.
Just go to FrameBridge.com, promo code STEAM.
Again, FrameBridge.com, promo code STEAM.
I got some bad news.
We got old people that are just acting up again.
You know how these old people do?
These old bags of bones?
Oh, Dylan.
Is it?
The only thing keeping me alive is my OnlyFans account.
Oh, come on.
Yeah, I eat a bowl of oatmeal on it every day.
It's good ASMR.
Speaking of that, we should probably just power or draft oatmeals.
I'm putting my feet pics on there.
One nickel.
Yeah.
One nickel for one pic.
The ages I'm killing.
Yeah.
They call me Paula Bunyan on there.
You know why when you subscribe.
Dude, the bunion is always.
Paula Bunyan.
Dude, one time when I was so when i was working
at my old job it was in a retail store and i was working the sales floor one day and this old lady
came in and she couldn't bend over to put on some shoes and she asked me to help and she said hey
be careful of my bunion and i was just like yo you got to get out of here lady like i'm sorry
but that's not this isn't my job if you have bun job. If you have bunions, you can't be in my life.
I had a planter's ward on the bottom of my foot in ninth grade.
Sideline me from the golf team for a number of months.
It sucked.
What were you planting in there?
Just all sorts of stuff.
Agave.
Really?
Yeah, desert plants only.
That's kind of swag.
I need to up my succulent game.
DPO.
That's how I'm riding still dpo desert plants only it's kind of it's the motto write that one down for the merch meeting
hey there's a dude in wisconsin he's from fond du lac you guys familiar with fond du lac wisconsin
i summer there yeah he holds uh he holds a place in the Guinness Book of World Records,
and he celebrated 50 years of eating McDonald's Big Macs this past Tuesday.
Is he the same guy who chained himself to that Russian McDonald's?
No, I can tell you they're very different.
Yeah, it was on May 17, 1972,
when Fond du Lac's Don Gorski ordered his first Big Mac
at a McDonald's restaurant.
Since then, he has had one almost every single day.
Don Gorski is a quintessential Wisconsin name.
Don Gorski.
Damn glad to meet you.
It's Don Gorski, yeah.
Yeah, it's Don Gorski.
Yeah.
Don Gorski.
I'll take one of your Big Macs, please.
Dude, of all the burgers to go all in on man yeah it's
fine he's like yeah i'm don gorski i'll take another yeah don we know you come in here
literally every fucking day in order to do something like we already have it made for
you just take it the patties are so thin yeah my don gorski dude he's eaten 32 672 big macs
in his lifetime how does he know the exact number because Because he's in the Guinness Book of World Records, and that's what you do.
32,672 Big Macs in his lifetime.
What's his cholesterol chicken in that?
Dude, I don't know.
They didn't report that.
You know what's funny is that when I hear about this, I'm like, oh, I can't believe it.
And when it's time to eat dinner, I'm like, oh, I can't imagine eating McDonald's.
Well, I'm the same guy. I'll go get fried chicken with popeyes it's like there's not any
worse i mean remember that that documentary about the dude who ate mcdonald's like every meal
um what's it called supersize me supersize me and he morgan freeman you watch his you watched
his body just turn to absolute shit and he his energy levels plummeted like it was morgan spurlock it was bad well this guy has a this guy would like
to refute that documentary okay you ready for this quote from him how old is he currently don
gorski boy that is a cast i don't know he's old uh it says i got a comic of somebody saying that
i was going to die of a heart attack within 15 000 big max heck now i'm over 30 000 and i'm still
alive it's not really the food
you eat it's your lifestyle if you're lazy i probably would have gained a lot of weight but
because i'm so active i burn off my only calories oh this dude moves around yeah hey dude we get it
you're participating in brett's stand-up challenge so i looked up supersize me just for the cast and
can i read some of the names morgan spurlock of course michael jordan i'm
thinking of a documentary that's what it is oh it is uh britney spears how are these people in
this documentary did i miss something uh final one jared fogel your hero oh no they don't make heroes at uh subway it's a good say i just bailed you out
you did i was out of position yeah you took the block yeah
so what you don't paint dave like that dude that's your business partner he was a subway guy
oh yeah no i you know the you know the dude twan who i used to work with at subway this is like right
at the beginning of the jared campaign we had like a cardboard cut out of jared like holding the pants
and every day he would say he would say jared's a bitch or something like fuck jared you guys
definitely you guys definitely fake humped that cardboard cut out at some point probably worse probably uh not gonna say it but we definitely
we definitely probably walked by it and did like pump faked it you pump fake the cardboard cut out
of jared and then i got left left off the schedule right you ain't on it that's what she said i go
i go where's the schedule she's gonna i don't know why you're looking. You ain't on it. All right, Anita.
I guess I'm out of here.
I guess I'll skateboard home.
Did you guys hear about this Pope news?
Yeah.
Dude, he's got some knee pain.
Why did I think the Pope wasn't allowed to drink, man?
Well, he drinks a shot of tequila to help his knee pain.
Can you imagine the Pope just like chilling back with a bottle of Closet Azul,
just absolutely vibing? Dylan, you thought the leader the catholic church couldn't drink please dude he's like the guy we'd be drinking you know he's very he's a god tell him no he's a godly man who
could tell him no i just thought maybe not be setting an example for not a human for his people
you know like i don't drink maybe you shouldn't either i don't know catholics
though they party he said do you know what i need for my knee this is from the pope mobile he was
doing this in he said some tequila so they're going to deliver a bottle of santa marta to the
hotel where he lives is that good tequila hard to say if the pope's drinking you gotta think it's
not mid do you think he eats the worm?
Yeah.
Not a lot of podcasts out there brave enough to wonder if the Pope's eating the worm.
Gets all psychedelic and shit.
Can you spell Santa Marta?
Pope is spelled P-O-P-E.
Maybe the Santa, no, it's, I'm sorry, delivered to the Santa Marta Hotel.
I misunderstood the actual story.
But if you got the Pope drinking your tequila, that's a good marketing plan.
You better up the servers.
You better get Micah in there.
See, I thought he only drank red, red wine.
No?
It's the body of Christ.
That communion wine?
It's the body.
60 minutes. It's the blood of Christ. Oh, yeah. The bread's the body of Christ, Dylan. It's a one-hour mark. That communion one? It's the body. 60 minutes.
It's the blood of Christ.
Oh, yeah.
The bread's the body.
Come on, man.
Some humor at the expense of Catholics, if you're listening.
No, it's not at the expense of Catholics, dude.
I write with Catholics.
Dude, I've been Presbyterian since the start.
Damn, son.
You know we eating and drinking the body of Christ.
My brother in Christ.
Thank you.
Oh, got him.
Shots to the Popemobile.
I always thought that was one of the swagger things that the Pope ever decided to do.
It's like, nah, I want this golf cart with these really thick-ass windows.
Yeah, I'm going to need some bulletproof glass.
Yeah.
Please.
It's tight.
Did Brett just flip the conference room table over in there?
I think he did.
He just threw his mouse.
Someone canceled an ad where he just threw the mouse at the wall.
We just lost Framebridge.
Yeah.
They didn't like the Arby's content.
Like, you can't mix.
Yeah.
I've been suffering from some strained ligaments in my knee for months,
but luckily this Closetazou is clearing everything up.
That's not how he sounds.
I feel better than ever.
Just a little hornitos.
I do a little.
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
That's one thing.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I got tired of doing my physiotherapy.
It was two hours a day.
I just pour some tequila and put put on the only fans yeah i like
this george clooney stuff there's a lot of additives to make it taste different but he
doesn't he puts out a good product mescal is pretty mid casamigos casamigos was good for the
first couple months dave i got a i got a tiktok for you to watch i got a tiktok guy for you
he takes he takes these tequilas and he says why you shouldn't drink the tequilas that we're all
drinking and then he presents you with a better't drink the tequilas that we're all drinking?
And then he presents you with a better option in the same vein.
He probably has some steak in that one.
Don't listen to that shit, dude.
No, no, it's tequila.
Yeah.
No, he's not doing steak content.
It's meat smokers only.
By the way, it's steak night.
What kind of shit is he talking about, these other tequilas?
He actually, this is actually, we did a tequila tasting when we were in mexico last year
and uh we asked the guy we're like instead of cosamigos what should we drink and he showed us
this bottle and i completely forgot what the bottle was it's the exact same bottle that the
guy in the video did maybe he did the same tequila tasting and it was actually cheaper it was 25
dollars for a fifth instead of like 40 or 50 what's uh the nombre of this i'll have to find it
i did like the video on tikt TikTok so I could reference it later.
Very cool.
That is why I like things on TikTok.
I don't like them because I like them.
I like them so I can reference them later.
Hey, do me a favor and send that link to daddy.
We'll get a chance.
I can help you out.
Thank you.
I can toss that link to a player.
Whoa.
You guys feel that?
Ooh, yeah.
Ooh, I think it's this weekend in fun presented by Mizzen in Maine.
Ooh.
You guys are, you know, people are getting out these days.
You know, we're not stuck in this pandemic situation.
And you might be taking your first vacation in forever and you're not sure what to wear.
And, you know, sometimes on vacation you want to get a clean fit off.
You don't want these wrinkles.
Not only are we stepping out more, but it is getting hot, hot, hot outside, folks.
I mean.
You need a material that's not going to show all that sweat.
Yeah.
Right?
I mean, it's golf season, too.
Like, we're out here traveling.
We're out here playing golf.
And I don't want to be wrinkly, and I don't want to be sweaty.
So what do I got to do?
I got to holler at my friends over at Mizzen and Main.
Because I used to dress.
I used to dread wearing a dress shirt pretty much anywhere.
And I don't have to worry about that.
And that's why you got to go check out Mizzen and Maine,
my friends.
Mizzen and Maine combines the comfort and flexibility of your favorite
athletic wear with the fit and style of a custom dress shirt,
lightweight,
breathable,
and moisture waking Mizzen and Maine's clothing will have you looking
great.
You can even skip the dry cleaner.
Their shirts are machine washable.
So you can,
you can just skip the trips to the cleaner and call it a day.
You know how nice it is to be able to
throw on a mizzen button down?
If you have to go to your business casual dress code
job and you're walking from that parking lot
to there and you get in the back sweat,
the mizzen one, had that been around when I was
doing that gig like 15 years ago,
it would have been a game changer.
My solid white mizzen button down is
becoming probably my most worn
shirt in my repertoire.
I think I wore that one to your wedding.
It is.
It's dynamic.
It's great.
Dynamic.
It goes with everything.
Everyone knows that when I get home from a long day at work and after I take a shower,
I like to just toss on a hoodie.
And these guys aren't just a dress shirt company.
You're a big hoodie boy.
Dude, I got one of their new hoodies.
And I have to say, I love the material.
It's so comfortable. They also make golf gear, no tuck shirts, performance polos, hoodies, and I have to say, I love the material. It's so comfortable.
They also make golf gear, no-tuck shirts, performance polos, chinos, and so much more,
all in the performance fabrics with modern tailoring.
Because with Mizzen and Main, it's never felt better to look your best.
Whether you're working from the golf course or finally taking advantage of that unlimited vacation policy,
we've got good news.
Right now, if you go to MizzenandMain.com and use promo code CIRCLING,
you'll get $35 off any regular- order of $125 or more. That's $35 off when you go to M-I-Z-Z-E-N-A-N-D-M-A-I-N.com and use our promo code circling for $35 off. Dylan, what are you getting into this weekend? asking will um interesting little weekend coming up for your boy uh neither bay nor i have we our
kids will not be with us friday saturday or sunday um furthermore bay has plans all friday nights i'm
i'm free as a bird i might say only fans friday i might just stay home and log into my only fans
account no i don't know man i'm wide
open cut that ready i'm wide open i might hop on the sticks friday i don't know what's gonna happen
might get crazy might drink a whole bottle of class a azul with the pope i don't know
shouldn't drink that apparently something told me that well you're getting up charged you're
getting up charged for the ceramic bottle so if you're actually looking for a high quality tequila
and you know for a good price it would be a mistake to do that.
Okay.
But it is a, I do like the tequila for the record.
I mean, that's facts.
Yeah.
Anyway, I might drink wine.
I don't know.
Wow.
I polished off that, that Gio So family wine the other day.
Sad it's gone.
Oh, that thing was gone within two days.
Yeah, that did not make the weekend.
Shout out Jake.
So good.
Yeah, I'm wide open. Dave, I know not make the weekend. Shout out Jake. So good. Yeah, I'm wide open.
Dave, I know, Will, you'll be out of town.
Dave, if...
Hey, Dave, I'm talking to you.
Sorry.
If you want to holler at a player, if you see me in the streets,
like, you got my number, you know?
Okay.
We can hang out.
There's been talk of golf Saturday from Brett.
I don't know if that's happening or not.
No, that tee time's not made by now.
That's not happening.
Oh, there's the tee time.
The tee times are made.
Oh, okay.
Never mind.
If you want to commit to it, I think we could probably get you in.
Oh.
Are you playing too?
Someone's on the spot right now.
Am I playing?
Well, I don't really want to give away my entire weekend of fun, but yeah, motherfucker, I'm playing.
Damn, the boys are playing?
All right, I might get the sticks out see that's not no i might get the sticks out the guy who made the tea time
is gonna have somebody feel because you just been you've been hunting you guys he's got no kids this
weekend oh bae's definitely gonna be hung over from whatever she's doing friday night like get
out there and go play golf with the boys too in total strap move is that right we're not doing that strat daddy i i i'm
not one to unapprove or disapprove someone's nickname that's you know has nothing to do with
me it's his business but i can't let that be a thing i'll text him right now and i say do you
like this nickname he's gonna be all over it we'll see he's a strata caster he's a strat daddy
it's good too strat daddy that's better than Strat daddy of the month That's better than the former
Total strat move?
Doubt it
Bitch
Alright
Stop
Make Dylan stop talking
By talking about your weekend day
We got game one tonight
Western Conference Finals
I know today's Wednesday
What is that?
Why are you telling me this?
Well because that means
We've got game two
Friday night
So my Friday night Is gonna be me just on edge
just sitting there by myself really yeah you're gonna be edging i'm gonna be just edging
this will be in the other room watching selling sunset which i am kind of i'm kind of in on now
i've been watching it as we go to bed and told you it's it's pretty good and it's
every every every uh female on there looks like she was on a like one of the older casts of the
bachelor you like rochelle don't you so i don't know much we're a little behind i know there's
some big time things that like her divorce and there's some there's some stuff she's married to
uh an actor i forgot his. And he just left her.
I just don't get like one day just like, hey.
I look at selling sunsets like I look at selling NFTs.
Like I can just take a screenshot of it or take a photo of it myself.
And suddenly it's mine.
You're running this joke back for I think the third time.
I mean, it's like what?
Like that's your sunset?
Like there's a lot of people in the world who probably won't.
Is Christine though?
She's a problem.
She's a problem, dude.
Absolute rabble rouser. She's a firecracker. She stirs the pot. probably won't. Is Christine, though? She's a problem. She's a problem, dude. Absolute rabble rouser. She stirs the pot.
Yeah.
Who's the dark-haired one?
Alright, doesn't matter.
I like the twins, too.
Are you talking about Amanza?
Amanza. Not Amanda. Amanza.
When we had to cancel something,
a shower for
somebody, or for Rhodes, obviously, not for somebody.
My sister got a Manzon cameo to do like a thing.
Oh, really?
And I remember at the time being like, that's great.
Doesn't really move my needle.
She's the most grounded of the crew.
Now I'm like, oh, she seems legit.
Now your needle's moving?
Moves the needle.
She's a sweetheart.
I understand who she is now.
She's great. So I i'm gonna watch i'm gonna watch uh basketball i'm gonna watch
selling sunset playing golf saturday morning it's gonna be a good time i'm really looking forward to
it maybe i'll eat mcdonald's i've been i did nuggets you can get 32,000 Big Macs, though. I won't do a Big Mac.
It's just an overrated burger.
Sunday, no real plans.
Will, you got anything better than that?
Probably.
Oklahoma, where the wind goes, wrestling across the plains.
I'm going to Oklahoma this weekend.
Roll your own joints if you're there.
I'll be rolling my own joints in Oklahoma this weekend.
I'll be going to Tulsasa the beautiful city of tulsa uh i will be going
to the pga championship on friday and saturday holler at a player if you see him on the course
that's probably gonna be just out there just doing bro things with t-man the entire time
if you're gonna holler though make sure no one's about to hit their shot because
they get kicked out for that.
I'm just going to be screaming free fill the entire time and people's backswings getting on TV.
I'm not going to do that.
Are you going to post up in that pool?
I don't know what I'm going to do.
I don't know what the situation is.
They're really forcing my hand of getting on the course as much as possible with this whole Tiger Rory speith uh you know tea time that they got going on so on friday afternoon i'm gonna do my best to see as much
of them as i possibly can as you know in terms of my favorite golfers they're all right there
they're all right there okay right now of those three who is around for the weekend
uh speith is around for the weekend rory is around for the weekend. Rory is around for the weekend.
I hope Tiger is, but I, I, that's my ranking of who will be around for the weekend.
Spieth, Rory, Tiger in that order.
Okay.
I will cheer in the opposite order for them to win.
Dude, that is going to be an insane crowd following.
Yeah, that's what, that's the concern.
It's not going to be a situation where you can just follow. So I'm going to have get a little strategic with it but i'm excited for it um it's a bad time to be
a mickey bang bang i'm going to drink so many mickey ultras out there it's just going to be
tough but you know 18 a pop you know it's going to be t-man asked me last night he's like how can
they do that that's because because t-man they know that we will drink them they know that we
are dumb enough water they know that we are dumb enough and thirsty enough to go drink $18 Michelob Ultras.
$6 water should be illegal.
They do have well cocktails for $15.
People are underrating that.
Are they?
Yeah.
I mean, $15 well.
No, but if you're going to complain about the $18 Michelob Ultra, the alternative of getting a $15 cocktail is not the worst alternative.
They could probably charge $23 for a cocktail and people would still pay it.
Man, people are going to get – it's going to be hot out there.
People are going to get slammed.
It's not supposed to be that hot.
Really?
Well, Friday to Saturday is supposed to be a little vibe.
Yeah, I'm excited.
I've never been to a major before.
I didn't get invited to the Masters like Dylan did. Oh, yeah, I did go to that major. Yeah, so it's my first major. I'm pretty. I've never been to a major before. I didn't get invited to the Masters like Dylan did.
Oh, yeah.
I did go to that major.
Yeah.
So it's my first major.
Pretty excited about that.
We have a very early flight out on Sunday morning that's going to put me back at home
at like 1030 in the morning so I can just post up, drink some beers.
I got a lot of Pacificos left over in my fridge from Fritz's birthday party.
Is that like a 90-minute flight?
I don't know.
It can't be that long. No. My worry is that I don't think we have a direct flight i don't know can't be that long no my
worry is that i don't think we have a direct i don't know if there's a direct to tulsa i think
we have to go through dallas oh hopefully it's love uh if it is love i can confirm that i will
be going to chick-fil-a during the layover dude just some people are calling it the chick-fil-a
over that's pretty good jeez just go post up people watch at love field yeah it's a hot airport feel inadequate
because it's just hot hot people and dudes wearing like suits and stuff they're going to do deals and
you're just like their suitcases all cost more than like my net worth they're like oh this guy
has an away i got mine at harrods in london Away. I'm seeing Away's everywhere now. Yeah, dude.
Every other dude has an Away bag.
You know why?
Because they're legit.
We don't have a code anymore, do we?
No.
No.
They're an old sponsor.
They're dope, though.
I'll still keep that thing on me.
Yeah.
We kept them long.
Or we signed them on, so we got that pre-bag.
That was sick.
You know, I got that bigger carry-on.
I also have the small carry-on, too.
Wow.
I also have the XL.
Okay. You're just flexing now. Well, I had numerous sponsors carry-on. I also have the small carry-on too. Wow. I also have the XL. Okay.
You're just flexing now.
Well, I had numerous sponsors with them from across numerous podcasts.
So it helped me out greatly.
Must be nice.
It is.
Free shit's dope.
Should we get out of here?
Yeah.
Good.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye. Thank you.