Circling Back - ChatGPTFMs & The Biggest Black Hole Ever

Episode Date: June 28, 2023

Will reads a bunch of AI-generated TFMs from ChatGPT, Dillon discusses the largest black hole ever found, Randy's affinity for craft cocktails, and This Weekend in Fun. Enjoy a free two-week trial ...on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/circlingback  Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop  (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (15:54) AI-Generated ChatGPTFMs (37:15) Dillon’s Spacebar: Black Hole Edition (51:30) 21 Cocktails Is Too Many (1:00:45) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Rhoback: www.rhoback.com (BACKER20 for 20% off) Miller High Life: www.millerhighlife.com/washed ROW by Academy: Head to a store or at www.academy.com/row  Mugsy: www.mugsy.com (STEAM for 10% off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from the pig pen. My name's Will DeFreeze. To my left, David, MrPaperPig.com. Ruff. All right. PaperPig or PaperPig? PaperPig. Okay. Hey, speaking of pigs, we missed something yesterday. We were unfortunately not on the air.
Starting point is 00:00:45 Randy's doing better. I'm here to say that he sounds good and we should have the game show up this week. But I think if you guys don't mind indulging me, we would be remiss if we didn't acknowledge something that went down three years in a day. acknowledge something that went down three years in a day. This is the anniversary. My wife, date night after three plus months locked up in quarantine, waiting for shredded cheese as it's the only way she can eat fajitas. We've asked four people, going on 18 minutes now.
Starting point is 00:01:26 Just unreal at Allen, Texas location. We got to quit blaming hashtag COVID-19 for crappy service. Thank you for your service. Opinionated much podcast now defunct and now deleted. An iconic day of content for sure. One of the best Friday nights I can remember. You try to make a statement like that using your wife, an image of your wife, when in reality all you're doing is embarrassing the living shit out of her for years to come.
Starting point is 00:01:56 That's a tough one. I wonder how much they think about that today, like on a daily basis. Do you think they're still together? I hope so. Do you think you can make it through the the date night the shredded cheese date night incident like do you think that's one that he hears about a lot i have a question might be a horny question okay i like where this is going how has there not been an instagram ad established regarding his wife. Or a cash app.
Starting point is 00:02:26 Or a cash app. Or Venmo. A Zelle. A Zelle. You trying to fire off a couple small payments? She cute. She is cute. Kind of got lost in the Karen-ness of his tweet that she's pretty cute.
Starting point is 00:02:39 She just looks so put out about the shredded cheese situation. Dude, I get it. I get it. Honestly, three years ago, I didn't really have that many opinions about shredded cheese and in the last three years my affinity for it has grown day after day after day and now i will go to certain tex-mex restaurants and order something just based on the fact that they have good shredded cheese would you sit there as your fajitas are getting cold because they won't bring you the cheese it shouldn't be getting cold they're on a sizzling hot platter well they're they're going to get room temp, sir.
Starting point is 00:03:07 They're going to get overcooked is what they're going to get. This is just unreal at our Texas location. Hey, man, that was a tough time in the service industry. That was early COVID. Dylan, we got to quit blaming hashtag COVID-19 for crappy service. We were three months in, weren't we? I don't know. It was June.
Starting point is 00:03:24 No, because it was opened up. So I don't really know. We were five months in. Yeah. Four months in weren't we i don't know it was june no because it was it was opened up so i don't really we were five months in yeah four months in yeah i don't know man but just date night after three plus months locked up on quarantine how how far is alan from duncanville i don't know i don't know him 45 minutes we gotta go i the fact that we haven't gone and sat in this actual – like sat at this table is – we're robbing ourselves. Dallas meetup. We could parlay. Should we just have the Dallas meetup at me casino?
Starting point is 00:03:52 Yes. Oh, God. I've never been to a MECO. I've only been to one, and I didn't do it the way that you're supposed to do it. I did it for lunch with Dave and maybe some people who were indicted. And we didn't do it how I wanted to do it, which was for me to sit down, get sizzling fajitas, and drink like three Mambo Taxis.
Starting point is 00:04:11 Mambo Taxi, is that a margarita or something else? Yeah, it's like a Mambo or a margarita plus. Let's see what's happening. How many people? Do people go there and do the Lou Vega challenge? What's that? I think they do one, two, three, four, five. You have five Mambo Taxis. I'm telling you, I think they's where you go two three four five you have five mambo taxis i'm telling
Starting point is 00:04:26 you i think they cut you out after two why you don't want to look at the waiter and say give me mambo number five like you're not gonna bring you five drinks i guess i guess you have five people there what if you're if you're with four other people and someone's like no i just want like a regular frozen a little bit of jess you have four mambos at the table. You have to tell her, like, dude, we're doing Mamba number five. In my life. It is frozen. It is tequila, triple sec, lime juice, agave nectar, kosher salt, and then a bunch of ice. It's a margarita.
Starting point is 00:04:56 So I don't really understand why. Okay. But it does have a reddish hue. You know what my mom's into lately in the margarita space? I don't. She's doing sangria swirls.ria swirls yeah it's pretty savage pretty savage i uh i ordered a strawberry dot the other day and they were confused as if i wanted a strawberry margarita with a dot of lime margarita or if i wanted a lime margarita with a dot of strawberry and i was
Starting point is 00:05:26 like okay i still remember how excited she was to see me at matzo rancho that time that you were out of town she didn't know she was going to be seeing me it was excellent she's a big fan of dylan it made my week she's a big fan she likes all of us she's she's one of watch me these biggest fans great hugger chill out no not in a weird way dude come on dog that's my mom dude she's probably listening right now um hey nance don't i'm gonna order you a mondo taxi that's good that's good brett left work yesterday because randy and i turned on uh macho man by uh village people and we started singing mondo man and brett was gone in the office within 10 minutes i'm's like, I'm going to go work from home the rest of the day. Mondo, Mondo, man. Mondo, baby. I want to be a Mondo man.
Starting point is 00:06:10 It's tough. It's tough. It's amazing it took this long to catch on. Dude, I forgot that we went to Mi Casino in Frisco. Frisco, Texas location. Just unreal. If I remember it the way that I think I do, we were the only table sitting on the patio.
Starting point is 00:06:24 It was the least electric atmosphere I've ever experienced. No, it was a Tex-Mex restaurant. It's not good. And to be clear, Mi Casino, it's definitely not the best Mexican food in Dallas, but if you want a combination of what I think is good food and great atmosphere, that's your spot. I'm a little worried.
Starting point is 00:06:44 Are you going to intro your other- Hang on. He's worried. Fucking let him go. A little worried, dude. About how are you gonna intro um your other hang on he's worried fucking let a little worried dude about how late you're introing me is that the worry so sally's birthday is like just a little more than a week away i bricked it for for mother's day and i ordered her something online but i don't know if it's going to get here in time i'll do the thing where you print out like the receipt like hey this is this will be here in like three days have either of y'all gotten any shipping confirmation about your high flyers capes yet uh-huh no not yet i just imagined a world in 5 15, 20 years where just a bunch of kids are running around in high flyers capes at live events. She's a crusher's gal.
Starting point is 00:07:31 Really. I was talking to some of y'all's girl, and she was a Niblicks fan, if you know what I mean. I don't. Why don't you explain? Dylan Chivry, ladies and gentlemen. Also yesterday, it was DJ Screw Day. I was banging screw literally all day long. The 35-minute version of June 27th.
Starting point is 00:07:51 Dave knows what I'm talking about. Will probably doesn't. He's from Michigan. Aw, dude. I was banging all day long yesterday. Shout out DJ Screw, RIP. That's what you were doing. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:00 No, it's a, you know, DJ Screw. Yeah, I'm familiar. I'm familiar with this game. Also. Are you going to buy a DJ Screw vinyl? Housemates Sangria in the Mambo Taxi. oh it's a you know dj screw yeah i'm familiar i'm familiar with this game also you're gonna buy you're gonna buy a dj screw vinyl house made sangria in the mambo taxi that's what i thought it looks like a sangria swirl which is why i brought up the you know what my mom's doing yeah let's take nancy let's call her mambo nancy mambo oh actually i like that oh that's good mombo taxi i like it yeah also um I'm drinking out of my space mug today.
Starting point is 00:08:27 Is that foreshadowing for what may be to come later? I don't know. Maybe stick around and find out. There's weird emphasis again. What happened? You're the weird emphasis guy. Find out. Hey, why don't you find out if maybe we'll talk space later as I drink from my space mug.
Starting point is 00:08:42 That's a lot of trouble just to get some coffee. Is this the most impractical mug that you you've gotten from listeners oh i don't know let me pull my spaceman a little tiny spoon out what is it that's a cocaine that's a cocaine spoon who we have a listener who sent you a mug that has a cocaine spoon hold on randy why would you do that just before nine minutes i mean yeah just before nine minutes hey let me pop top real quick t popping top hold on t-bone thickens will have this up in minutes dude i like that you're wearing the austin fc jersey today yeah i'm on my fucking shit today i've been thinking about lately like
Starting point is 00:09:16 with them being so bad i've been less inspired to uh toss on my austin fc jersey i think i might need to put it on tonight fair weather rele alert. I mean, to be honest, I am kind of showing my true colors with how little I've cared about them since they suck this season. Yeah, and it's not Verde. What if they got relegated to club collegiate team? That would suck.
Starting point is 00:09:38 Dude, that'd be kind of sick if instead of being the Verde, they were like the Rojo. The rose. I was thinking more like UT-themed. Burnt orange? I don't know. Aranjo?
Starting point is 00:09:51 Anaranjo. What is it? Anaranjado? I'm not confident enough to deliver that word right now, but I think you're right. Anaranjado. Yeah. My Spanish is pretty good. Anaranja.
Starting point is 00:10:01 That's how you... No, I think that's how you... That is the food, Dave. The fruit and the color are different ones. Yeah, that's facts. That's weird that's how you that that is the is the that is the food dave like the fruit and the color are different yeah that's fact that's weird i don't like that they should combine i don't like that one bit the fruit is the color orange yeah how do you know i don't people have told me are you guys ready colorblind for those new here
Starting point is 00:10:27 yeah for what for wills five-star review why is the crowd so like concerned they're fine don't lick your lips and look at me when you're about to read it. They're fine, David. It's just a review. This is a five-star review left this past Monday from user PleaseShutUp. Oh, that's not very nice. No, no. They're nice. Don't worry. I think they must have...
Starting point is 00:10:55 They probably left a negative review on a different podcast, and now they've left a positive review on our podcast with the same negative username. But I got good news, boys. It's a juxtaposition. This is five stars. More new sponsor alert. you on our podcast with the same negative username but i got good news boys it's a juxtaposition this is five stars more new sponsor alert said y'all got chill sponsors and all but dylan's big text voice needs more prominent place on the show maybe just like an old sponsor alert also randy is pretty chill i would like more randy on my Monday mornings. No one's ever said that.
Starting point is 00:11:25 Are you pretty chill, Randy? Yeah, I'm a motherfucking frat star. Yeah. I can't preface every single ad read with old sponsor alert. Yeah, that would really get a little old. We have a recurring sponsor. It's just a little much. It is a dope voice, so thank you for acknowledging that and giving me props.
Starting point is 00:11:42 So this person wants more big text voice and more randy i can't believe i didn't submit an application for the the new big text voice yeah you know they gave it to right who john leguizamo no they didn't as the past though no they didn't david what if they just like actually just did like an an AI Christopher Walken for big tech? Welcome. That was not good. State Fair. You didn't put your heart into that. This is the State Fair.
Starting point is 00:12:11 Welcome. Get some saltwater taffy. I really just, former President Barack Obama, President Obama put differently. How would he welcome people to the State Fair? Welcome to the Fair. Walking on down the midway, huh? A little hot. Get a lemon chill.
Starting point is 00:12:30 Maybe some Dippin' Dots. Funnel cake. Get you a fried, fried chicken Oreo. Yeah. Mr. Obama, I'd like some fried butter. Where can I go, President Obama? Deep fried butter. Get you a piece of pizza.
Starting point is 00:12:44 We can fry that too. I don't want pizza. I want a deep fried butter. They have a piece of pizza. We can fry that too. I don't want pizza. I want a deep fried butter. They have deep fried pizza there, facts. They absolutely have deep fried pizza. They will fry a shoe if you want to. I'm a little bummed that I don't remember what I actually ate deep fried there. I got the deep fried butter once.
Starting point is 00:12:56 Sally and I went after the game. Good. After the game where we just drank beers the entire time, that's when we went and started trying the deep fried stuff to try to take the beer away from our bodies. They had a deep fried PB&J sandwich. It was absolutely fire. I would do that.
Starting point is 00:13:09 I would do that. I just looked it up. I'm going to miss it this year, boys. I'm not going to be there. Where are you going to be? I think I'm going to be at the hospital. What's going to happen? I think Sally's going to have a baby.
Starting point is 00:13:20 Yeah, it's October 7th, which is famously like... Just ask her to hold it in a few more days i could yeah i could it's easy like hey babe i'm gonna go to this college football game with two teams that i have no actual affiliation with go eat butter it's fried yeah i'm gonna go uh clog my arteries before we have a second child it's good have a heart attack don't do that last part why i want to show that i'm different i don't i really don't should we just get started today before we get started today let's hear from our friends over at row by academy you guys familiar with this stuff uh very much so yeah whether you're trying to get in the zone or just out for the day,
Starting point is 00:14:05 Rose, a collection of on-trend closet staples made for whatever you're up for. It won't weigh you down with loud neons, oversized logos, and practical fabrics. They include a classic color palette, an inclusive tailored fit that will always be on trend, and they're versatile enough for errands, dinner, even a low-key evening. They dropped a bag on us in the form of some boxes absolutely full of clothes. Would you guess that I'm wearing their shorts right now, or would you guess that I'm not wearing I don't think you'd bring it up if you weren't. Well, I've got news for you. I am wearing their Are they moisture wicking? They are. Oh, they're hidden pockets. I can't find them.
Starting point is 00:14:37 That's how hidden they are, dude. That's sick. Does it have a tailored inclusive fit? Yes, they're very comfortable. I love wearing them. I know that you're colorblind, but would you say that the color of these shorts fits into a tonal palette? These particular ones are black. I can tell that one fairly easily. Oh, yeah. Is that tonal?
Starting point is 00:14:53 I don't know. I don't either. Call you a tone ranger, dog. Yeah, that's what they call me. We've been big fans of this stuff since we got it in the mail. Pretty much all of us have been wearing it on the daily. It's just comfortable. It's just nice.
Starting point is 00:15:11 Honestly, it's an absolute delight i love them i wear them to the gym um regularly shirt and shorts their fan and the shoes for that matter it's certified sweat boy season randy's been wearing the shoes all over the place the shoes are my gym shoe of choice now really yes that's why i'm not wearing them today because I left them, unfortunately, in my gym bag. You idiot. That's a big, big Al-Ahmad bar. You are such an idiot. But when I get home, I'm going to go in for lunch. Got chicken piccata leftovers.
Starting point is 00:15:32 I'm going to switch shoes. I'm going to do a little shoe swap. Okay? It's a shoe swap. That's what it is. If you're looking for reliable staples and accessible price points, shop Roe. Sold exclusively at Academy Sports and Outdoors. Visit academy.com
Starting point is 00:15:45 slash row or a location near you to stop by guess what it's time for a segment that i came up with yesterday i mean you guys are familiar with uh, artificial intelligence. It's intelligence that is not real. It's artificial. Chat GPT has kind of been one of the catalysts here that has really launched AI into the mainstream. You guys are familiar with Chat GPT, right? Oh, yeah. I've dabbled, yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:21 You can type in several things and ask them questions, and Chat GPT will spit out answers for you. So I thought to myself, you know, what if we had leveraged AI when we were at Grand X? What would we have done leveraging AI? To be fair, the tech wasn't there. That would have been a layup for a lot of, I mean, when we had to write one-liners, for example, columns even,
Starting point is 00:16:44 sometimes we struggled. You get writer's block, for example, columns even, sometimes we struggled. You get writer's block, sometimes the internet's dead, David. I hate it when the internet's dead, dude. It'd be nice if you could be like, hey, write me something that's fratty. Well, you've come to the right place. Well, I wanted to put it to the test today. I wanted to see just how frat ChatGPT can be.
Starting point is 00:17:01 I want to know if ChatGPT could get a bid. Chat GPT-FMs. I want to know if chat GPT is a five-star frat star. Could chat GPT have skipped Rush, gone dove hunting, and still got a bid? Oh my God. That is the question so i typed in yesterday and i requested that chat gpt spit out some tfms some classic tfms because that's life when you're
Starting point is 00:17:35 a motherfucking frat star that's big old fact randy knows so the first tfms that it spit out i'm not gonna lie they were kind of generic You want to hear some of them? Yeah. Keeping a cooler stocked with cold beverages in the back of your truck at all times, just in case. That's fact. That's fact. What do you mean generic? That's frat as hell. Just wait.
Starting point is 00:17:55 Could be beers, could be waters. Being the reigning champion of beer pong and securing your spot as the undisputed king of the frat castle. That is so sick. It did not write that.puted king of the frat castle that is so sick it did not write that i swear to god guys guys when i say i haven't edited any of this i swear to god i have not edited any of these can you remind me what you typed in to get these answers i typed in uh can you please write some tfm one-liners you said please i i'm very polite to chat GPT. I asked for some one-liners in the style of Total Frat Move. I later went back to get more, and it did not work the second time around. Does it put.tfm at the end?
Starting point is 00:18:36 It says tfm colon, and then it does it. They're also very – for some reason, it does a lot of hashtags after it. So like that first one about keeping your vehicle stocked with beer, it had hashtag never thirsty. Frat Castle. You think when the team that got together and was like, hey, what's next for technology? How about intelligence that's artificial?
Starting point is 00:18:59 I think when they started doing the coding and like, man, 100 years from now or 50 years from now, whatever, when this is a thing, they're going to be writing Frabbit. Not just any Frabbit, total Frabbit. People are using this for very real world applications and not us. Throwing the wildest theme parties
Starting point is 00:19:16 on campus complete with outrageous costumes, epic decorations, and an unlimited supply of Solo Cups, TFM. That is certified frat. Oh, yeah. Having a collection of classic American muscle cars because real fraternities roar with horsepower, TFM.
Starting point is 00:19:33 I don't really know if that applies. I have triples of the Barracuda, actually. It would be cool if there was a fraternity that was known for their Jay Leno-esque collection. Yeah. Who are these guys? What? Wearing boat shoes to the formal and rocking a bow tie
Starting point is 00:19:51 that perfectly matches your date's dress. Hashtag preppy chic. TFM. These are trending gents. Leave out the preppy chic. Like, hey, babe, I got to get your dress pattern so I can get a matching bow tie.
Starting point is 00:20:04 You know what? That may have been me at some point. Organizing the most legendary spring break trip to a tropical paradise where the sun, sand, and parties never disappoint. Actually, what's more fret is to spend spring break at home because spring break, as we all know, is for GDS. It's true, dude. Spiff good eye.
Starting point is 00:20:22 Imagine spending money. Building a reputation as the ultimate grill master. Flipping burgers and slinging steaks with the precision at every tailgate. I mean, yeah,
Starting point is 00:20:33 that is cool. That is, it's not funny, but it is somewhat fraternity. Yeah, I mean, there's a charcoal grill element to it. You gotta know how to use it.
Starting point is 00:20:44 This next one's kind of more of a goblin move, in my opinion. Perfecting the art of the late night food run and proudly displaying the trophies, aka empty pizza boxes, in your room. That is a TGM. No one is doing empty pizza boxes at the frat castle. How about the almost empty pizza boxes
Starting point is 00:21:04 that you bring to your office? Empty bottles of Kentucky Deluxe, maybe. You put it on top of your cabinets in the kitchen there. That just sounds like decrepit behavior. Just pizza boxes everywhere? Come on. No one's displaying that. No. Get it out. Always having a solid supply of golf balls
Starting point is 00:21:24 and a set of clubs ready to hit the course whenever the frat bros call for a round. Yeah, owning clubs is cool. It is fratty to own golf clubs. You've got to be ready to go at all times, though, Dave. If I call you up. I've got to bring them with me. I need you to be at the course in five minutes.
Starting point is 00:21:39 You've got to be there. I'm your frat bro. That was an ongoing joke, was that our particular organization had the look of guys who at any moment could go play nine on any course. It's a compliment. Yeah, at the time it was. Now I look back and it's like just completely.
Starting point is 00:21:56 Those Andrew Ralph Lauren shorts. That's the five-inch inseam. And a polo. Definitely rocked the five-inch inseam. And maybe a bar hat to go along with it. Fuck yeah. Cox hat. Mastering the art of the shotgun,
Starting point is 00:22:11 popping open a cold one with a swift and effortless motion that earns the respect of all fraternity brothers. TFM. These are so noble. Yeah, some of these are very... All fraternity brothers. I'm glad you said that. I'm glad you say that because i
Starting point is 00:22:26 got a little frustrated with how you know generic and kind of just safe these were you know and so i asked chat gpt to quote make them more rowdy add a little spice to it i said more rowdy i didn't know if they would know i didn't know if chat gpt would know what i was talking about any mention of a gentleman in this in the rowdy section i don't know but we'll see okay ready for you ready for the rowdy ones This is these are these are the after dark TFMs chat GPT FM's, okay? Hosting the most epic keg stands setting records that would be whispered in fraternity lore for generations to come TFM Man the most epic keg stand dude. You have no idea. I got your record eternity lore for generations to come. TFM. That is a good one. Oh, man. The most epic keg stand, dude.
Starting point is 00:23:07 You have no idea. What's your record, Dave? I can only do like 14 seconds. I was never a big keg stand guy. It's not comfortable, man. No, I'd rather just drink it as I stand upright. I'll bong a beer over a keg stand any day. I'll bong a beer over pretty much anything.
Starting point is 00:23:25 Bonging is sick. Bonging is objectively the sickest. It's frat. Tell me if this is frat, Dylan. Okay. Turning your backyard into a full-blown beer Olympics arena complete with keg races, flip cup tournaments, and a golden trophy for the victors.
Starting point is 00:23:40 My name is John Duda, and I smoke cigarettes. A golden trophy? Yeah. For the victors. For A golden trophy? Yeah. For the victors. For the victors? Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:23:49 That was a stupid question. Hey, I did. I wrote this. No one's saying the victors. Like what? These are like 18th century England TFMs. Hello. Oh, the victors. There's a trophy.
Starting point is 00:24:03 Total fraternal move. The fraternal order. Organizing a legendary road trip with your brothers, hitting up multiple college towns, and leaving a trail of unforgettable parties in your wake. That sounds fucking sick. That's what it's all about. Keg in the closet, pizza on the floor.
Starting point is 00:24:19 That sounds money, dude. Just fucking, yeah. Being the life of the party and earning the reputation as the go-to guy for starting outrageous drinking games that push the limits of sanity and sobriety. TFM. Damn. These guys go way too hard.
Starting point is 00:24:35 Dude, this guy's insane. Dude. This guy now proposes credit card roulette to the table. This guy's a fret legend. Oh my God, dude. People are still talking about this guy. He's been off campus for like eight years now. I think you're going to like this next one, Dylan.
Starting point is 00:24:53 Establishing a signature fraternity chant that echoes through the halls, striking fear into the hearts of rival houses and summoning the spirit of true brotherhood. Okay, TSM. Summoning the spirit of true brotherhood. Gotf i think the spirit of true brotherhood got a little smug at the end if someone says that to me at like irl they're getting punched in the face we're brothers for life hey dude so dude i've been noticing that you haven't really been summoning
Starting point is 00:25:16 the spirit of true brotherhood lately hey man we're brothers for life let's summon the spirit of true brotherhood together man shut up i'll get i'll get like a ouija board like try to summon the spirit the frat spirit hey no mention of pledges yet what's going on i want a hazing one well here this one's kind of for dave oh no taking your frat bros on a wild adventure exploring the great outdoors with activities like cliff diving whitewater rafting and conquering treacherous hiking trails that's not frat it's fucking teddy teddy roosevelt it's not frat unless you bring like cocaine and natty lights with you i want like uh i want one that's like getting a dui in your dad's seven series like let's get let's get
Starting point is 00:25:57 raunchy yeah mega frat i mean it is it's not good bleeds on the scantron shit it's not good behavior nosebleeds on the scantron that was one of my faves i don't remember that one nosebleed on my scantron that's so good oh my god see the implication there david said he's done some cocaine you said scantron it made me think of uh big content guys very nice story about the late, the great Ryan Mallett, rest in peace, in which he walked into class and said, who's got a Scantron for Ryan Mallett? Apparently a big third person guy in college, which you got to love. I think it was a pencil. He was looking for a pencil.
Starting point is 00:26:39 Was it a pencil? Yeah. Who's got a pencil for Ryan Mallett? I like that. Rest in peace, Ryan Mallett. Nosebleeds on the Scantron is so good. I've got four more. Transforming your fraternity house into a den of debauchery for theme parties that push the boundaries of good taste and leave the campus buzzing.
Starting point is 00:27:00 Have you ever done that, Dave? Have you ever created a den of debauchery? Dude, last night was debauchery? Dude. Last night was debaucherous. Dude, so I was going through my binder full of women in my den of debauchery, and I think we got to invite Sarah and her friends over more. We used to play a game in our front yard called debauchy ball. It was like bocce ball, but much more debaucherous.
Starting point is 00:27:20 We used eight balls of Coke instead of wooden balls. Yeah. I almost died. I didn't know y'all balls. Yeah. I almost died. Yeah. I didn't know y'all were that. I really enjoyed this next one. Okay.
Starting point is 00:27:30 I really liked this one. Conquering the local bar. It's like a pack of wolves leaving no dance floor on shaken, no drink unchugged and no opportunity for mischief untouched. Yeah. Mischief. You gotta think there was some chinos friction going on dude i like the idea of a bunch of wolves shaking the dance floor chugging drinks and just getting into mischief they didn't leave a single drink on chug yo we gotta get these wolves
Starting point is 00:27:57 out of here why are the wolves this is not we're taking all of our girls. No, dude, that's just Leo and Tobey Maguire. They're 50. This is incredible. Becoming a legend on campus by successfully pulling off the most audacious pranks, leaving the administration scratching their heads and your brothers rolling with laughter. See, we stole their composite. See, AI is giving too much credit to the vocabulary of someone who would be composing at TFM. No one's saying audacious. No one's putting audacious under the wall.
Starting point is 00:28:34 That's not fret. No. Not a fret word. The final one. Dominating the intramural sports scene, winning championships in football, basketball, and anything else that involves competitive testosterone-fueled athleticism. It's not frat to be too good at all the sports, though. It was fun to like the one sport like you were good in to be really good in it. But like for the most part, it was like taking pride in how unathletic you were. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:29:02 It's like, oh, we're – We drink so much. We've entered the dad bod phase of our lives. That's why the chicks love us. We don't work out. We drink a lot of beer. The dad bod stuff played really well at Texas State in 2003, I can tell you that. We used to be good athletes, but now we just drink beer and we don't care.
Starting point is 00:29:17 My first week at Grand X, I was tasked with just simply, hey, Dave told me, hey, man, just write columns this week. Don't try to butt off more than you can chew. Let's get some traffic in the door. Just write some columns. That was my style.
Starting point is 00:29:29 I'm a manager. I liked it. I liked it. It made me feel comfortable. It made me feel like Dave trusted me to do some writing. There's still confidence in your writer.
Starting point is 00:29:35 Yeah. But then Ross came up and he was like, hey dude, this dad bod shit's really taken off. I'm going to need you to write like three
Starting point is 00:29:41 dad bod columns this week. And I was just like, three? Sick. So then I just got to write about having a dad bod for like three days straight. There's really not that much you can say about it. No. It's like, yeah, I'm not in good shape.
Starting point is 00:29:53 I was like, am I just getting tasked with this because I'm new? Or am I getting tasked with this because I'm noticeably less in shape than some of the other people that work here, like Dan? The dad bod phase of online humor, it went on way too long and it was too popular it wasn't that it wasn't that big a deal my body's actually gotten i mean i don't have a good body still but my body's gotten better since becoming a father i love your body thank you it's a wonderland well it's perfect imperfections i put on my peloton playlist before klein's wedding last weekend on the drive there and i was so fucking
Starting point is 00:30:25 ready to go she's got me fired up just biked it there i thought about it i thought randy and i might just go bike there he wasn't invited oh randy sorry randy dude he should have crashed it man that would have been debaucherous that would have been frat as hell that would have been so oh my god that's the life of a motherfucking frat dude that would have been audacious you know what i've got a fucking hankering for mischief hell dude hell yeah no one has ever said no one's ever saying like dude it's gonna be a mischievous night dude no one's doing that dude do you remember those guys we met last night those guys were mischievous gentlemen we should start a clothing brand called the mischievous gentlemen. The mischievous lads.
Starting point is 00:31:09 Dylan, when I was drinking my Miller Lite out of a bottle and you walked up with your bottle and clanked it on top of mine and it spilled everywhere, that was pretty epic mischievous stuff there, man. I'm so audacious of you, though. Dude, you were pushing the boundaries of just everything there dude that was very fraternal of you you summoned the spirit last night you summoned the brotherhood spirit pretty hard last night you know what we're doing right now we're making fun of
Starting point is 00:31:35 we're making fun of a computer oh it's fun though this ain't Timon from South africa talking about like weightlifting no one's feelings are gonna get hurt no we're just making fun of computers dude we're beat we're beefing with a this is the only this is the only podcast that roasts computers we're beefing with coding right now dude fuck you that's so stupid yeah dude fucking bitch dumb ass computers. Stupid ass. Let us write the frat moves.
Starting point is 00:32:06 Maybe we'll do it with PGPs sometime. I'm going to write a frat move before too long. Post it. I'm going to make a bunch of graphics with some of these frat moves. I'm going to post them. I want one of summoning the spirit. I want to see what that would look like. Brotherhood spirit.
Starting point is 00:32:23 Yeah, we did summon some spirits last night. Talking about vodka. Yeah, dude. It was so epic. Yeah, I had my stomach pumped. Yeah. You must have really drank a lot. I still made it to brunch.
Starting point is 00:32:35 Damn. Yeah, my parents are in town. Bottomless Mimos. Yeah. My parents had to bail me out. Damn, and you went straight to brunch after that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was a big straight to brunch after that. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:45 Yeah. It's a big night. Gabotrous. Yeah. Thankfully, your dad's a fucking doctor and your mom's a lawyer, so you don't really have to worry about shit today. Yeah. My grandpa's the judge. My fucking frat bro's the only jury I care about.
Starting point is 00:33:01 Yeah, it was in my peers. It was in my peers it was in my peers for life for life brothers for life man fuck you we are get out of here i don't even like you what if you got a phone call right now from like one of your fraternity brothers that you forgot existed and he was like dude i need help. Don't you have friends? He's like, dude, I have a job right now. He's like, dude, aren't we brothers for life? Like, no. Drop everything.
Starting point is 00:33:29 Like, the moment I left school, I didn't think about you once after that. Hey, man, I hate to call you, man. I know it's been a while, but last night got a little mischievous. Someone summoned the brotherhood spirit, and things just really unraveled from there she went bad dorn oh my god yeah i would be like yeah man i'm just gonna keep living my life good luck with your flat tire in the middle of nowhere summoning summon summoning is a good word so stupid i'm thinking of like a ceremony it's just all sitting in like a frat basement together just summoning the spirit of brotherhood
Starting point is 00:34:15 everyone just has like a nice two-button ralph lauren polo tucked in with like a v vines belt or southern proper belt there's a there's a cox hat in the middle of the floor that it's just glowing everyone's got frat swoops yeah someone has to sacrifice their swoop you have to like take one strand from a brother's hair and throw it onto the cox hat and that's how you summon the spirit no Nah, dude. You're not fucking taking any of my frats. You pour some trash can punch on it. Bunch of frat dudes just with like witches. PPD. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:53 Our buddy will not be named with his – dipping his entire arm in there and stirring. Stop, dude. That's gross. We need to move on. That's where I draw the line. It is frat, but that's where I draw the line. That is disgusting.
Starting point is 00:35:04 Yeah, it's, looking back, there's about a 99% chance How many arm hairs of your buddies have you ingested? He didn't wash his hand, let alone his arm. We definitely ingested some arm hairs in our day. What if I told you there was a place where you could find the most comfortable jeans, chinos, shorts, and joggers
Starting point is 00:35:20 ever, boys? I'm not talking about your frat basement. I'm talking about Muggsy. Muggsy makes everything with buttery soft, patented stretch materials not talking about your frat basement. I'm talking about Muggsy. Muggsy makes everything with buttery soft, patented stretch materials that look stylish but are insanely comfortable, never too baggy, never too tight. They're definitely the best thing to happen to legs since chairs, and never in human history have legs been so spoiled by
Starting point is 00:35:35 the pure softness and comfort while looking so damn good. These guys are on a mission in life to give every guy the confidence to walk blindly into their closet, reach out into the abyssyss and know whatever they pick will have them looking good and feeling even better you will literally never have to shop anywhere again they've got stores in addition to online if you're in chicago boston dc texas make that happen you got to go in and see this stuff you got to go touch it for yourself you got to go see how see this stuff. You got to go touch it for yourself. You got to go see how clean these tees are, how tasteful their crewnecks are, how comfortable the jeans are.
Starting point is 00:36:09 Yeah, they have a lot of good stuff to offer. The jeans, for my money, they're bread and butter. They're just outrageously comfortable jeans and look really, really good. And the Coolmax summer ones, which I haven't even got my hands on yet, but I can wear the other normal ones in the summertime. I'm still okay, but I gotta try those yeah, they got that cool max denim that are like air conditioners for your legs lightweight fibers to ensure a cool breeze with every single step
Starting point is 00:36:32 you can go from the backyard barbecue to the bar in one swift motion all summer long right now, head to Mugsy.com get 10% off using code STEAM that's 10% off using some of the most premium jeans, chin chino swimwear and shorts on the internet mugsy also offers free shipping and free returns so there's absolutely no
Starting point is 00:36:51 risk giving them a try if you're in chicago boston dc or austin make sure to head downtown and check out their storefront as well easy vibes every time and guess what you can enjoy a beer while you shop they'll leave the light out for you that wasn't the uh that wasn't the sound effect i was looking for the perfect way to close yeah yeah i was looking both of those things could happen i was looking for this one must be time to travel through space to a place far far away we're talking about something um space related here david okay keep going you were doing really well
Starting point is 00:37:36 tweet caught my attention last night you guys on twitter yeah at the carter rough and it was about space and you know your boy just gets straight horned anything that's about space any kind of just wild statistic or new um new revelation about space your boy is tuned in why did you say that word as if you were the lead singer of papa roach revelation because you did i did a little bit anyway here's a tweet from um at latest in space oh great account just like the latest news about space low-key must follow yeah i think yeah i agree news astronomers have Yeah, I agree. News. Astronomers have discovered the largest black hole ever. Wow. And it's over 30 billion times the size of our sun. Not like our kids.
Starting point is 00:38:37 The sun that's in the sky. It's only in the fifth percentile of height. Both of those things would be huge. That would still be huge, 30 billion. The big fiery ball that gives us light during the day that sun if this thing's so big why'd it take us so long to find it reaching the upper limit of how large a black hole can theoretically become wow wow can you imagine something that is 30 billion times the size of the sun which is no by the way 864 000 miles in diameter yeah and and the fact that i can't imagine that means i can't really comprehend it
Starting point is 00:39:15 so i just kind of tune it out i'm like well i i my brain isn't uh i don't have enough wrinkles in my brain to even like fathom if you were to try to walk across from one end of the black hole, assuming you could, a dog getting sucked through. Dude, no, you might as well be walking on the sun. So some people out here might struggle to understand black holes just like me. Sure. So I did what I do now. And I've now asked ChatGPT to explain black holes like I'm five so i did what i do now and i've now asked chat gpt to explain black holes like i'm five what'd they say i don't understand black holes like where does the
Starting point is 00:39:51 shit go black holes son said imagine you have a really big bathtub with a drain in the middle when you fill the tub with water it goes down the drain and disappears now imagine if you have a drain in space that was so strong it could suck everything up even light and that's what a black hole is like a super duper strong drain in space it can suck light through dude think about think about the power nothing escapes it it says the black hole's gravity is so powerful that it traps everything that comes near it just like when you drop a toy in the bathtub drain it doesn't fall down the drain is that something people are doing we're losing a lot of toy i I'm sorry. I asked them to explain it like I'm five, so they're putting it in terms of me taking a bath as if I'm five.
Starting point is 00:40:28 Oh, okay. Oh, they're literally doing it like you're five. Yeah, and it says black holes are really weird because they're strong, and they even bend. They're bendy. They bend space and time around them. It's like they create a big hole or dent
Starting point is 00:40:40 in the fabric of the universe. They're called black holes because they don't give off any light. They're like invisible monsters in space that eat everything up. Dude, what if it just sucks us up one day? Everything about that shit? Wouldn't it happen so fast
Starting point is 00:40:52 we wouldn't even realize it? Some wonder if we are in a black hole. If we get sucked through, what happens to us? Your matter ceases to exist. You fall asleep and ask for a towel. Yeah. I got some bad news.
Starting point is 00:41:06 What? you heard him what the fuck is wrong with you are you that was way too horny all of a sudden it's out of nowhere what dude whole squad condensed into a quantum singularity 30 billion suns 30 billion suns david the sun if i had to guess it's like what like 864 000 miles in diameter yeah i said that earlier he gave us that stat i was listening um so 30 billion times that that's a lot unbelievable i just just the sheer size of this thing is i can't stop trying to grasp it and i fail to do it every time do we not wonder about big space i feel like there's been a lot of space stuff coming out lately like is it all just clicking at the right time for these people brett teased us on some shit that's coming down the pipeline pretty quickly here we asked him to
Starting point is 00:42:03 explain like all right this is kind of hard to decipher. Can you, what's going on here? He just goes, it's going to change the way we think about space. He was really excited. He says it's going to change the way, like, physics. I don't know. Yeah, he said it basically. Gravitational waves.
Starting point is 00:42:16 He said, Dylan, Google gravitational waves, July 26th, I think he said, or June something. I'm just confused as to how Breck got advanced access to this scientific information. He has Google alerts to sciencealert.com. It alerts you about science. Apparently there are two pieces of space information that come out the same day that really change the way,
Starting point is 00:42:41 it's going to change science moving forward, apparently. I like the- Just like the Seg to change science moving forward, apparently. I like the... Just let the Segway change transportation. That's right. It's a little different, maybe. The Central Market Security Guard has a Segway. Really? Yeah, I see him going through the parking lot.
Starting point is 00:42:56 He's just cruising around. Making sure people aren't getting their cars broken into. You should trip him. No, he's doing his job. You should put a stick in his spokes. I don't think they have spokes. But if it did, that'd be funny. In any way, he's got... No you should put a stick in his spokes it's i don't think they have spokes but if it did he's got in any way he's got uh no wouldn't dude he's got spinners on there so just chop up the stick when he stops on the segue they keep spinning you don't have elbows
Starting point is 00:43:15 poking out no no elbows that went bad shredded some tires my favorite part of the article brett sent us to is it's the uh the artist the artist's depiction of two colliding black holes. And I'm not saying it's a bad depiction. I really don't know. But I do wish I was an artist who like randomly would get called upon by ScienceAlert.com. And they're like, hey, can you like whip something up like two black holes colliding? Like what would that even look like? And you're just like, all right, give me a couple days here.
Starting point is 00:43:47 I'll be right there. Say no more. That's all. I just wanted to bring everyone's attention to this black hole that we've discovered. How'd they just discover this? It's probably very far away. Did Jimmy Webb discover this? Hey, space is pretty big, Will.
Starting point is 00:44:03 Did Jimmy Webb do this? They would have credited Jimmy if this had been a Jimmy Webb, John. far away did jimmy webb discover this hey space is pretty big will did jimmy webb do this i would they would have credited jimmy if this had been a jimmy webb john what if jimmy webb looked so far back in the past as we all know it can look into the past that it um basically whipped around and started seeing into the future like it it looks so far past you see what i'm saying can you even comprehend that no i don't know how to comprehend that the um our sun is like it's over four billion years old by the way still burning not concerning you know uh light from the sun takes about eight minutes to get to earth david you're just giving
Starting point is 00:44:41 us facts it gives about takes about eight minutes to get to earth yeah that. You're just giving us facts. It takes about eight minutes to get to Earth. Yeah. That's how far away it is. So if it... Speed of light. If it burned out, we wouldn't know for eight minutes. I bet scientists wouldn't know before it reached us, but we would all know.
Starting point is 00:44:53 They wouldn't tell us because of panic. Yeah, but... Brett would know because of sciencealerts.com. Yeah. Brett got the advanced information. Yeah, he would.
Starting point is 00:45:02 He did the thing where he told Dylan, he didn't even look at him. He was like typing. It was cocky. Look up gravitational waves June 27th. Or June 29th. And we're like, okay. Okay. Looked it up.
Starting point is 00:45:16 Dylan and I read it. We kind of looked at each other like, none of this makes sense to us. Yeah, I have no idea what I'm reading, but it sounds exciting for some people who understand science to that level. It's just not me. If there are any women in STEM who understand what's going on and can explain the significance of this to us, please leave us a voicemail at 888-618-4422. Again, 888-618-4422.
Starting point is 00:45:35 Get in, get out, be scientific. I don't know if – yeah. Woman, explain it to us. I don't know if tactical can be applied to this. Yeah. We might need a few minutes. And we don't – just to be clear, we don't stand men in STEM
Starting point is 00:45:46 as much as we do women in STEM. And so we would prefer if it was a woman in STEM. We still ride for our men in STEM, but we definitely prefer the women. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:54 My order goes women in STEM, smoking STEMs, men in STEM. Dude, I only smoke that sticky. So I can't relate to that. Really? Where are you getting your sticky from lately?
Starting point is 00:46:05 I got a guy. Yeah? Yeah. He only gets the stickiest, stinkiest chronic. He was that old sticky bandit, right? He just got out of prison? Yeah. Really?
Starting point is 00:46:17 Is his name Marv? Is that skunk? Is it Harry? It's that skunk weed. Do you think that Marv and Harry ever got into pushing any weed before they got into robbing homes in Home Alone? They're fictional characters, and I don't think they had roles written for them
Starting point is 00:46:32 outside of what happened in the movie. It's fan fiction. I think they would have. I could see them being arms dealers. Ooh, war dogs? They're not smart enough for that shit. Yeah, but they're dumb enough to get into it. Who's the dude we traded for Brittany Griner?
Starting point is 00:46:47 Oh, yeah. The merchant of death? Yeah. For a basketball player. What if Joe Pesci was the merchant of death? For a basketball player with a weed pad, and we traded the merchant of death. Yeah, I stay in Brittany Griner, so I'm not going to besmirch. No, I do too.
Starting point is 00:47:02 I'm glad we have her back, but yeah, I feel like there's one GM who made out much better on this trade. Yes. It's like trading Otani for Profar. Why did you point at me? Yerkson, dude. Yerkson doesn't deserve that. I'm just kidding. He's fine.
Starting point is 00:47:19 What's your problem? He's made a nice living in the MLB. Will's the Profar hater. Dude, I like him. You got to bring him up and let's see his true potential. He's on his fantasy team. It didn't really work out. Then we sent him back down, I think.
Starting point is 00:47:29 It was a bad deal. Now he's in, where's he at? San Diego? He's going down, down to the minor leagues. He was relegated. There's not a song that goes like that. There could be. Pro-fars going down swinging.
Starting point is 00:47:44 That's good. That's good, man. He's got a glove though He can flash a little leather out there Sure he plays a fine outfield An 0-2 count Cock it and swing it That's good You gotta swing
Starting point is 00:47:55 You can't strike out looking You can Randy did last night I wanna say Randy struck out Randy struck out in so pitch so far Oh I've definitely done that.
Starting point is 00:48:06 Half our team did because the ump was calling every ball a strike. I heard my favorite statement. I heard my favorite statement that you can hear from anyone involved in sports earlier in the bullpen. It was when Brett said, I'm not one to complain about the refs, but. Like, yep, let's ride. It was bad. Okay.
Starting point is 00:48:23 You can't. Dude, you have to swing with two strikes and pick up softball. When it's above your head, well, you're supposed to swing it. Oh, no. Dude, I would have pissed on that thing. That thing would have been gone. High heat? I take that out the yard.
Starting point is 00:48:37 I don't. Hey, I've confirmed that Ryan Mallett, the late The Great, did stand up in a lecture hall before an exam and yell, hey, who got a Scantron for Ryan Mallett? Oh, so it was a Scantron. It was a Scantron. That's sick. Do you have to bring your own Scantron?
Starting point is 00:48:52 Some schools you do, yeah. You can buy them at the bookstore. What are we even paying? It's ridiculous. Education. University system is a scam. In the $300 textbooks. The best was like when you would buy one for a class and it was like supplemental and you legitimately never opened it.
Starting point is 00:49:09 And then you went to sell it back to the bookstore and they're like, we'll give you $3 for this book. Bullshit. It's such a racket, dude. Dude, there's no bigger slap in the face than going to buy or sell your books back. Buy it for $300, sell it back for $41. No, it's cool, dude. They changed that one word in that one paragraph on page 68. Oh, this is not the right edition. You can't use this
Starting point is 00:49:28 textbook. Fuck you. Yeah, I can. College textbooks might be the biggest racket going. It's unbelievable. Like, it's crazy what they get away with. And a lot of professors write the textbooks themselves. Correct. They're the ones making money on it. Correct.
Starting point is 00:49:44 Yeah, they'll change a paragraph like, well, you gotta buy my new one now did you ever get like a cool professor who would just like print out like you'd photocopy and like just hand it out no we had a couple i i normally what i would do is i would just summon brotherhood and uh see if they had any notes or old tests dude we just use a test bank in frat boy could have used a test bank yeah we definitely did not have one of those it was like oh yeah this is here's a test from 1994 this is definitely useful thank you for this it's a history class yeah this professor retired nine years ago thank you i'm dead okay i'm no professor did we just summon the professor no we should use maybe we should start writing textbooks I'm the professor. Did we just summon the professor? Maybe we should start writing textbooks.
Starting point is 00:50:28 Why would the professor's first words after you summoned him be, I'm dead? I'm dead. We know. We summoned you. Your spirit. We threw down the cocks hat and poured trash can punch on it. Now you're here. Keep buying my books.
Starting point is 00:50:42 What a freaking racket. Trying to put my grandchildren through college that's life when you're a motherfucking front star okay we summoned the wrong spirit that's so we were looking for brotherhood and we ended up getting Professor... What's your name? Will. Okay, Professor Will. Yeah. That's good.
Starting point is 00:51:12 A little more energy that time. He ran out of material, man. Yeah, it's okay. His brain's deteriorating a little bit. He's dead. Thank you all for indulging me in my space bar segment. These are numbers that I can't figure out so it's all it's all just whatever it's fun pixie dust right dave do you have something you'd like to talk to the class about yeah this is mainly a this is a sad story
Starting point is 00:51:40 but i'm bringing it to light because there's somebody in this room who I think could learn a valuable lesson from it. And he may or may not have – he does have access to a mic. Whether or not he should use that remains to be seen. That being said, vacationer dies in Jamaica after trying to down all 21 cocktails on the drink menu. All 21. How far has Randy gotten during one of our very expensive – Four? Five? No. Four lobsteritas? I think he did seven at carve last time legitimately i told someone recently that we did the carve board
Starting point is 00:52:12 last time we were there and they looked at me like i was just ruthless they were like what why would you order 200 worth of meat it was reckless it was reckless yeah but but if we had all got steaks it would have come out about the same. Randy, what do you think the most signature cocktails you've gotten off one menu at a WASH Media event was? More than you. Frat. This dude's frat.
Starting point is 00:52:36 I would probably say five. I don't know if I got seven. Probably five. I would put it in the five to seven range. I don't know if I still have a picture of the receipt but i definitely took a picture of the receipt oh it's somewhere on twitter yeah it's got to be i would enjoy seeing just every receipt we've had from every dinner you'd always know exactly what randy got the t-bone and the my tie i'll try and find the picture so what's the cautionary tale, David? Just don't binge drink.
Starting point is 00:53:07 It says he had 12 drinks before returning to his room and passing away. So I'm just saying maybe keep it to moderation is key. So don't try to drink every single drink on the signature cocktail menu? You don't need to do the 21 cocktail challenge. I don't mean to be insensitive. I know that the man has passed away, and that's really sad but this dude was definitely not in a frat oh because we don't know that he was from uh england england's kind of frat yes it's not noble england's frat okay i'm back like the king is like the where is it where is it like your pledge class president um yeah or like the actual just
Starting point is 00:53:49 fraternity president it could be that too yeah okay no i think you're onto something queen is like house mom or like a sweetheart i didn't tweet about it my little sis she's my little sis she's cool man i we met out one time yeah you met out with your sister a little sis. She's my little sis. She's cool, man. We met out one time. You met out with your sister? Little sis. You're not listening. You're over there doing some shit. Yeah, you're out there
Starting point is 00:54:11 looking for receipts. I know you're doing a frat thing. I was just making it. You're just out here looking for receipts. You kind of took like some just good natured fun and you took it a little far.
Starting point is 00:54:18 It's something you do a lot. I don't mean to bring it up on the air, but let's talk about it. Dude, she's such a cool chick, though. Yeah, cool ass chick dude She's like my little sister Yeah
Starting point is 00:54:26 Don't fuck with her No She's off limits bro Seriously you hurt her I'll hurt you Yeah Don't give us that look You look stoned when you do that
Starting point is 00:54:43 Anyway man What's the sickest you've ever been after uh drinking i told you guys i threw up in nappa right no that one my puke shit is that real or is that a chat gpt no so we're in when we're in nappa um after the i guess technically the rehearsal dinner night for my sister-in-law's wedding uh the lads decided to go out for a little nightcap. And so it's me, a couple of my brothers-in-law, brother-in-laws, brothers-in-law. This sounds mischievous.
Starting point is 00:55:13 It's like hole-in-ones versus holes-in-one. It's, I think, both are RBI. My new brother-in-law and my new brother-in-law's father. Oh, he's an S. And so we walk into this restaurant. There was a backer there shout out to them and their family uh they came and said hi it was very flattered made me look really cool in front of my brother-in-law's dad they came and they said hi yep yep wow so then that's what
Starting point is 00:55:36 we're talking about man i don't know i i order an ipa at the bar and i i start to i like start to feel a little rumble in the tum tum and i'm like oh no so i walk outside and i'm standing there next to my brother-in-law's brother-in-law he and i have using i know he and i have met that day and we have not spoken any words to each other outside of exchanging pleasantries when we met and he looks over at me and he just goes you good you go i'm gonna be one sec i just sprint over to a big lilac bush around the corner, and I just release my demons. Lilac?
Starting point is 00:56:09 Lilac. Lilac, dude. I don't know. I've always said lac. Maybe it's the Michigan. Lilac sounds like some Dungeons and Dragons shit Randy's into. I'll push lac. Cadillac.
Starting point is 00:56:22 Like a Cadillac. On Swangers. Yeah. I don't. I don't drive a Cadillac.illac on swangers yeah I don't I don't drive a Cadillac what are y'all looking at oh my god we always call them lilacs girl what I wasn't I never questioned you I'm elbow you can pull the tape you can pull the tape I just dunked on your shit, dog. Just take it. I hope you get fucking sucked
Starting point is 00:56:45 into a black hole. You'll come with me, dog. I'm on the same planet. I hope your matter condenses. I'm different, dude. My matter condenses. Yeah. Okay, dork.
Starting point is 00:56:56 I hope that's what your matter condenses. You're the one who does a segment on it. Shut up. You ding dong. Talking about black holes and shit. What? What?
Starting point is 00:57:08 What? Oh, Randy hit Dylan with a DM. Oh, he's got the receipt. Okay. Let's see what we got. What'd you do? The receipt from our carb dinner. It's on it.
Starting point is 00:57:22 Okay. Daiquiri Down Under, one. Sorbet Sunday Sour, two. Unbelievable. Texas Tiki Dream, four. Bubbly Black Rose, five. Smoky, do you have an old-fashioned that night? Maybe.
Starting point is 00:57:41 You don't put off old-fashioned. Yeah, I can't picture you getting old-fashioned. I might have started with one. These martinis are not yours. Orange favorite mule. That's definitely Randy. That's at least five. Does that make five?
Starting point is 00:57:54 Yeah, that makes five. Okay, I think maybe it was just five then. If the old-fashioned was yours, he hit six. You were like a quarter of our tab. Five was potential to be six. Yeah, that's why. The fact that Randy does not drink wine always means that our tab is was potential to be six yeah that's why the fact that randy does not drink wine always means that our tab is going to be way higher because randy's going to be ordering like
Starting point is 00:58:10 an expensive bottle of wine worth that's a good point he also got the most expensive entree t-bone right um where is it what's your Randy? Well, I don't see it. No, no, that was at Perry's when I got the ribeye. Next time Randy asks for a raise, just show him that. Be like, you had a lot of tiki dreams. The Texas tiki dream. What? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:40 At a steakhouse. But my anniversary dinners are like six of the price. Facts. That is a great point. They feel free. You are like six of the price. Facts. That is a great point. They feel free. You're right. Hey, that's a good argument, man. That's all we ask.
Starting point is 00:58:53 It's time for This Weekend in Fun, presented by our friends over at Miller High Life. There's some moments in life that deserve celebrating, boys. Whether it's an accomplishment you have, maybe something that you've just been waiting for. I don't know, maybe like 4th of July? Is that something you guys want to celebrate? Yeah. Is that something you'd be interested in?
Starting point is 00:59:17 Drinking some American beers? I think so. America's birthday? We celebrate life's biggest moments with champagne, but everyday achievements deserve to be celebrated too. Whether you're closing out your to-do list, getting somewhere on time, or just making it through another day, hey, that's reason to celebrate.
Starting point is 00:59:31 So next time you accomplish something within you everyday, celebrate with Miller High Life, the champagne and beers, because that's what living the high life is all about. I've been drinking High Life's like they've been going out of style lately, and guess what? They're not going out of style at all. They're not. There's a new oyster restaurant in Austin.
Starting point is 00:59:48 And I have learned that we should have talked about this during our Patreon episode the other day when someone asked great combos. I did the champagne of beers and some oisties the other day. And it was so refreshing and nice. I've been enjoying Miller High Life's at home a lot lately, actually. Not a lot. I'm not overindulging. I'm just saying. Obviously.
Starting point is 01:00:04 They've been a staple in the household. Absolutely love them. Beautiful bottle, David. Classic design. Dylan came by my house to pick me up to go to the pool on the weekend. And when he pulled up, I was out front drinking a Miller High Life, just kind of hanging out
Starting point is 01:00:20 in the heat in my driveway. David's not lying. Yeah, pre-game. Miller High Life, you know it. It's the champagne of beers. It's a quality beer that's smooth and great tasting in the iconic champagne-like glass bottle with refreshing champagne-like tiny bubbles.
Starting point is 01:00:34 It's a celebration that's within everyone's reach. So welcome to the High Life. Welcome to the High Life. Go to MillerHighLife.com slash washed to find Miller High high life near you celebrate responsibly 2023 miller brewing company milwaukee wisconsin dylan what are you getting into this weekend oh thanks for asking will uh-huh uh friday i have nothing i am pretty wide open on friday but you got to get down on friday you got it wow uh rebecca black is that her name yeah
Starting point is 01:01:04 rebecca black hole my friday if she was a woman in stem right my friday is wide open on Friday. Got it. Wow. Rebecca Black? Is that her name? Yeah. Rebecca Black-Hole. My Friday. If she was a woman in STEM. Right. My Friday is wide open. I'll be listening to you guys, see what you guys have planned. I might try and drop a line.
Starting point is 01:01:17 Oh, that's an aggressive Friday. Saturday, family day. Got sister, brother-in-law, and their two daughters coming into town. I will also have parks that day. So we're going to get into some fun. Not exactly sure what we're going to do, but a full day of family time. Might get a swim off somewhere. My Sunday's wide open.
Starting point is 01:01:37 So, yeah. Holler at your boy if you see him in the streets this weekend. You got any Fourth of July plans? I don't, man. We're famously not going to be in the office Monday and uh monday and tuesday that's right i don't have any plans i nothing i know that sounds like some we have almost a week to figure it out with six days yeah do you guys have plans i'm not really not for fourth of july if you want to link and build guess you'll have to wait until I present my case. Can we reach a point in this company where we can buy a lake house?
Starting point is 01:02:10 Sure. We've got to make a lot more money than we're making now, I think. Well, yeah. They're not cheap, but I don't know. I'd like to have a lake house that's kind of like my thing and go there and not have to worry about, I don't know, Randy just whipping up signature cocktails at the same time I'm there. We can ride it off, take clients there.
Starting point is 01:02:30 We could do a placeholder for a lake house and just buy the DVD version of Keanu Reeves' lake house movie. I don't know if that's going to have the same effect, Will, but that's a great idea. Keep in common, okay? Thank you. Yeah. What's common, okay? Thank you. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:47 What's up? Dave? We are headed to my wife's uncle's place, north side of Houston, around Springway. You're familiar. You're familiar. We go there every fourth, pretty much. And he's got a nice big place, good pool sitch, little grotto. What's the damage on that?
Starting point is 01:03:13 I don't know what he paid for it. Maybe I'll ask him. I could see. We could Zillow it. I'm actually kind of interested. But anyway, it's always a good time. Throwing the kid in the car, the dog in the car, packing up ahead of their Saturday morning. Going to do some swimming, do some grilling, do some smocking, do some drinking. Good times.
Starting point is 01:03:33 Good times. Friday night. I got nothing. Probably won't do anything crazy just because I want to be in tip top shape for the two and a half hour drive. But, uh, yeah, the four, we're coming back Monday. The fourth is Tuesday and I half hour drive. But yeah, we're coming back Monday. The 4th is Tuesday and I have no plans.
Starting point is 01:03:48 I don't think I've ever taken in a fireworks display in the city of Austin. Okay. So that might be something we want to do with the child. He's not he's not seen fireworks yet.
Starting point is 01:04:00 You got to get that boy in front of some fireworks. Yeah. Maybe I'll buy some Roman candles so it's his birthday yeah let him hold one supervised
Starting point is 01:04:12 no Roman candle fights he's not old enough that doesn't happen to you like seven that is facts what about you not much I have a tea time on Saturdayurday i just don't really want even want to use it was just one of those things where it was like i'm just gonna get this and have it it's not happening though like it's gonna be too hot it's not gonna be fun i'm not doing it
Starting point is 01:04:37 but i have it uh and and so that really starts to bring into question what i'm gonna do with the rest of my weekend it hard to say as you guys, I've acquired a creamy and you can, in this Ninja Blender, aka the creamy, you can make frozen margaritas. And on Sunday, I'll be putting it to the test and seeing what kind of frozen margaritas we can work with. My brother-in-law is doing a brisket. And so I'm going to help out and accompany him on that journey. So if you guys want to see any meat shots from your boy, just holler at me. Follow me on the Twitter. I definitely do. You want to see my meat?
Starting point is 01:05:10 Don't post meat shots to Twitter, dude. That's for privacy. Why? I've got a creamy question. Yeah. What's the cleaning process like? It's just cleaning out a container, really. Like cleaning out a blender.
Starting point is 01:05:21 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Kind of. It's actually a little more easy. Isn't it? Good and so we're gonna see how that works uh and then i don't really know i don't really know that's kind of the main event of my weekend i am going out to dinner on monday night the third of july but i've also told the people that i'm supposed to go out to dinner with hey it's the third of july if we're trying to do something a little more america
Starting point is 01:05:42 driven we're trying to have a grill out, trying to eat some bratwurst and some chopped onion and mustard, we can do that. Maybe we can be some low-lifes drinking the high-life. Who knows what we can do? We'll see. We'll see about it.
Starting point is 01:06:00 I'll be bringing exactly 12 Miller High-Lives to Houston. I'm going to have a high-life today. Mark my words. I'm going to start this weekend and fall in on a Wednesday I'm gonna have a High Life this afternoon We got some High Life in the fridge It's been looking pretty good to me Crack one right now, you won't He's too soft
Starting point is 01:06:19 That'll be annoying to go walk to the fridge right now As we're closing the episode out He's a GDI I'm a motherfucking frat star, dude i'm summoning brotherhood right now we'll give you an honorary very debaucherous honorary bid dude i love mischief are you kidding me he does that's good stuff man has a fun epi i enjoyed your it was fun chat g p t fms there you go you got there you got there all right hey everyone out there be safe uh we'll be back uh with uh do you know it a game show podcast in listener voicemails be on the paywall patreon.com circleback podcast we'll see you there
Starting point is 01:07:00 bye We'll see you there. Bye.

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