Circling Back - Cheeseballs, Mullets, and Scooped-Out Subs
Episode Date: April 29, 2024Will is going to go full-mullet to pay off a bet with Dillon, the PGP subreddit keeps getting trolled, the dude who ate a bunch of cheeseballs in NYC, a Jimmy John's-centric Steam Room, Recapping This... Weekend in Fun, and more. Enjoy a free one-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/circlingback Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (14:09) Recapping This Weekend in Fun (28:30) Will Is Going Mullet To Pay Off Dillon Odds Bet (41:30) Will Reddit Segment (46:00) Dude Eating Cheeseballs in NYC (59:00) Steam Room: Will Went To Jimmy John’s Support This Episode’s Sponsors Mugsy: www.mugsy.com (enter your email for discount on site!) Aura Frames: www.auraframes.com (CIRCLING for $20 off) PrizePicks: www.prizepicks.com/steam (use code STEAM for a first deposit match up to $100!) Pestie: www.pestie.com/steam (10% off!) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
all right we're back circling back podcast monday
april 29th my name is will def To my left, David Carter-Ruff.
Good morning, podcast.
How's everybody doing?
Pretty good, David.
I was just checking the timeline.
There was a tweet.
I'm on Twitter right now, actually.
I'm just seeing this.
I'm seeing this.
It's a tweet that just dropped.
Oh, God.
I'm circling back.
Oh, my God.
I'm just seeing this now. I hope everybody has a great week. dropped. Oh, God. I'm circling back. Oh, my God. I'm just seeing this.
I hope everybody has a great week.
What is it, Don?
Whoever planned this to drop right as we started recording is a real jerk.
This is good.
We might be talking about two different things.
I didn't even know you were at Stagecoach this past weekend for your campaign event.
You're pretty fresh today for someone who is on Stagecoach.
AI's version of this is really creepy the way the hot dog looks
what do you mean i think you know what i mean explain to the people what you're talking about
what are you talking about i think oh it gives me like this weird goatee and it is so disgusting
what if that's how you look do you ever see photos of yourself and you're like wait that's how i look
because that's what's happening to you right now every picture and video i'm like wait that's how i
look oh just circling back to it says let's get these bonds it's a video of dylan running onto
stage and just getting a crowd real real stoked oh shit i didn't know i had an audience like that
did you i mean you're running for president so i'd assume that you do have some type of you know
audience that you could hone in on and mobilize in some type of way tom like see through the hot dog head tom what are you talking like
what are you even talking about you're just speaking out of your bun right now stop tom on
twitter notes that you even have the dick cheney balding pattern which you kind of do you are kind
of rocking that cheney did dick cheney at one point just say, I'm taking over this role. I'm the president for now.
For the next two months, George,
I'm president. Randy, do you help with this?
Next four years. You didn't
help with this? Are you lying to me?
They gave you
the task of creating this video. This was not
me. This was one
Ricky Prosper.
Actually, speaking of Ricky Prosper,
Dylan, can you show can you show
the people what's sitting next to you on your desk right there because ricky sent us a nice
little gift to the studio it's a vortex bottle sign i think i'm officially uh in possession of
some of the only remaining relics from the vortex bottle era and if anyone would like to contribute
to my vortex bottle museum that i'm starting within our studio, please send it to our office.
I'm thinking about just getting a full-on Vortex setup in the conference room, just having it be the Miller Lite Vortex Bottle conference room.
Everything except the actual Vortex bottles.
any you know recycling professionals out there who might be going through some recycling at any point in the near future could you please see if any of the miller light bottles in the piles have
any ridges in the long neck i still think you need to blow your own that's the thing so my uh my
cousin was in town this past weekend and she said that she's been taking some glass classes
and i was like i was like so you've been like can you blow glass yeah it's like because
i have some projects i'd like to get off the ground turns out i don't think i don't think
it's at that level yet yeah that's like a black belt you have to have a black black belt in glass
blowing we have to have one glass blower out there that listens to the podcast who can make a vortex
bottle right i think it's a dying art maybe that dying art. Maybe that's why they stopped doing the bottles themselves.
They got tired of blowing all the glass.
You think they were all just hand-blown, mouth-blown?
It's mouth-blown.
Right.
I don't know much about blowing glass,
but I will say glass blowing as an art
would be much more prolific
if it made the sound of a didgeridoo when you did it.
Wouldn't that be sick?
Yeah.
That sounded more like a vuvuzela.
Don't worry about my didgeridoo.
You are not listening to it in the right key, my friend.
A vuvuzela?
Is that what they're called?
Yeah.
I think you're right.
Yeah, I think it is.
I don't know if you...
Okay.
Did I put enough stank on the pronunciation of it?
I always said vuvuzela. Okay, it's not a a vuvuzela i think it's a vuvuzela though either way it's the
the thing that sounds like a swarm of bees at a soccer game that's not it no rules just right
sure sure should we get the aussies next door on a podcast? Honestly, yeah. I kind of
wish that dude doing business, dudes doing business still existed. So you could just talk
to them about what they're doing over there. Yeah. Many people. They have, for being a company that
seems to make software for a living, they, they have a camera set up of a small to midsize media
company. They do. Like we need to maybe just like slide over there one day and be like, yo,
can we use a camera just for like the day? Well, you know, next time we already talked to him about it.
Next time Randy's out for one of his five day bachelor parties or whatever, we're going to have their video guy come over and just give him a trial run.
Oh, shit.
Just as like a plan B.
Is Randy going to get Wally picked?
No, I don't know about that.
But I mean, Randy just has a lot of seven day bachelor parties.
Are they going to steal my J?
Is that what you say, Dylan?
Yeah.
You're going to get Drew Bledsoe, dude.
You're going to get Wally Pipped.
You're going to get cucked?
Yeah.
It would be a cucking of sorts.
We're even going to give him a bunch of Roebuck that he can wear, like, every day.
And some White Sox gear.
The White Sox are trash. are trash oh man so we're not
we're not going to a white socks game for the meetup why they turn it around why what it like
can we just get like a giant hospitality thing from like the white socks people because like
we might be a big draw like we might actually move the needle for their their at this point
i could throw out the first pitch maybe i don't know i know. I saw a video recently of a White Sox game,
and it said there might be 1,000 people here.
And if you tried to count all the people in the video,
I don't know if you could count 100 people at that game.
Should we go?
Like, if we got a bunch of backers to go to a White Sox game,
I feel like we could actually get that attendance up.
Should we just have the meetup at a White Sox game
and just mob in a section?
That sounds terrible.
It'd be fun.
That would be sick.
Section 120, we're taking over the entire thing
and getting bombed. What's their food? We could just pay one of the vendors to sit there and give us terrible. It'd be fun. That would be sick. Section 120, we're taking over the entire thing and getting bombed.
What's their food?
We can just pay one of the vendors to sit there and give us beers.
Food is pretty good.
Do they have like a bit?
Every ballpark has their food bits.
What's the White Sox?
I don't think they have a bit.
They just have a lot of Chicago dogs.
They have good sausage.
Buona, I believe is how it's pronounced.
Buona?
It's good.
But they have great food. They have great food, the White Sox. They have great food. Great food. Sure they do. Oh is how it's pronounced. Buena? It's good. But they have great food.
They have great food.
The White Sox.
Great food.
Great food.
Sure they do.
Oh, the food's great.
I'm sorry.
It's just not necessary.
I would go to a game.
I just don't know if we need to do a meet up there.
No, no.
I think we're just going to do the meet up there.
That'd be fun.
We're just doing it there.
We're just hammering $18 beers all day.
Who do they play?
Cardinals or some shit i think
the rockies oh the rockies is not a good match that's a that's a stinky match that's a below
500 matchup all the way around let's see let's see let's see when are we going to end of june
there are no winners in that june 28th or 29th oh yeah babe we got the rockies we would definitely
get on the big screen uh on the on friday uh Friday after the game, they have a Jordan Davis postgame concert.
Are we familiar with Jordan Davis?
Not yet.
That has to be a – that's a voice sixth place person.
Okay, good news.
Good news.
Saturday is an early game, so we can have a pre-meetup meetup.
And it's also Southside Basketball Jersey Day.
So we can get some jerseys that we can wear to the actual meetup.
For the first 10,000 fans?
Yeah.
Yeah, like 10,000 people are going to show up to that game.
I'm going to walk into the meetup like Joey Triviani with a million jerseys on.
You guys want like 10 of these?
Yeah.
Yes, I do.
We overprinted.
All right.
I found a little bit of Jordan Davis.
He has a song called By Dirt.
B-U-Y?
Looks like he is a Nashville artist.
Oh, I know that song.
I know that song, yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
Looks like a nice guy.
He gets play on the radio.
You got to think they're going to sell out the game because Jordan Davis is going to be there.
Yeah.
J. Davis?
Oh, I like this guy.
We got to make sure if we do go Saturday, we get there early so we can get one of those jerseys because they're
gonna go quick for sure they go real quick for sure for sure uh dylan chivry's in the building
today el glissadenta all right eight and a half minutes in love the intro thank you will very
happy to be here um i shared a little bit with you guys earlier but i started lord of the rings
last night familiar with that movie you're very, but I started Lord of the Rings last night. Familiar with that movie. Very familiar.
Lord of the Rings.
The Fellowship of the Ring.
I got pretty tired.
Okay.
Shout out Early Bird.
So I only watched half.
I shut it down halfway through.
I am going to resume probably tonight.
I will say, my favorite of the films is the second one.
So I just hope you make it through that one
because then I'll be happy.
It's, you know look
this is just not my genre of film y'all know that about me i'm not a not a medieval fantasy type
type guy but i'm i'm giving it my all this man was all the way in on game of thrones yeah all
the way in you don't you downplay your nerd it took me seven years to to give game of thrones a try oh like no joke i i caught up oh
i caught up right as the last season was starting i say seven i don't know how long this is but
maybe longer than that yeah anyway doing it giving it my all i have an open mind thank you for having
an open mind i will say it is not one that you can be half in on because there's just so many characters.
It's hard to keep up with names and whatnot.
Who's your favorite character, dude?
You're a big Samwise guy, I can tell.
You like his comedic relief.
Rudy?
Mr. Frodo.
He played Rudy.
He did.
I don't really have a favorite character.
Word.
Maybe Bilbo.
Word.
I don't know why. He's a real gangster. Yeah. I guess. I don't know. a favorite character. Word. Maybe Bilbo. Word. I don't know why.
He's a real gangster.
Yeah.
I guess.
I don't know.
Is he an eater?
He eats.
Yeah, probably.
He was first team munch.
I think he's an eater.
First team all munch.
I mean, Samwise is a real eater because he does Second Breakfast.
I turned it off right as Orlando Bloom's character entered the picture.
Legolas?
You don't want to see that guy standing at a bar ordering a drink because you're going
to think it's a lady and say something.
You got to be careful with that hair on it.
He's very pretty.
He's a pretty dude.
Very pretty man.
You'd be a big Gimli guy, I can tell.
Oh, Gimli's tight.
Have I met Gimli yet?
He's the dwarf.
So you probably, you meet him at the same time.
I don't think so.
Gandalf's a real one.
Yeah, that's true.
He's a real one.
He's facts.
You guys want my stat of the day?
Yeah.
I've got two stats of the day, actually.
What's up, dog?
Nine years ago, as of yesterday, I moved to Austin, Texas.
Nine years ago?
Nine years ago, as of yesterday.
Kind of wild, right?
Dave, thank you for the job offer to bring me to Austin, Texas.
Wow.
It changed my life.
Yeah, Dylan didn't want to hire you.
I know.
I heard Dylan was like, no, dude, we can't have real frat stars in here.
I was threatened by your fratness.
He's going gonna be like dude
it's gonna it's gonna look poorly upon the c-suite if we have someone frat in the bullpen
well day was like this guy has a good a good backswing i was like it's fine let me see your
backswing like it's fine it's fine it's fine that was a good move it's fine it's a good move
bringing you here the other stat of the day um this is a more personal one um i'd like to give a
congratulations my parents yesterday 45th wedding anniversary 45 years congrats amazing congrats to
them they went jordan on them she she that's great man have you got some emails to check my guy
yeah sorry no it's okay expecting one i was uh just peeping don't apologize for business dude just dude's doing business yeah hey shout out to your parents
bring it back i don't know just get the aussies in here are they going out to their favorite
restaurant in harbor i don't know it was yesterday probably texted him a little too late about it
probably should have given the phone call but it was a busy day with the boys you know how it is
let's get to this weekendend in Fun, actually.
You guys want to do This Weekend in Fun?
Can we do the cold call song?
I mean, here's the thing. The cold call song is kind of the best right now.
I love it, but we're going to ruin it.
Well, the people behind the paywall are the only ones who have heard it
so far. They'll have to figure that out.
It's one of the perks. If there was only one way that
they could hear that song.
It's time for this weekend and fun.
Bro, let's go out this weekend.
There's a crazy event happening.
I like to turn up.
Bro, bro, bro.
There's a crazy event happening.
Let's just go have fun
and let go of it.
Let's go.
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willing to take dylan what'd you get into this weekend thanks for asking will uh i had a pretty
low-key friday well um you. What? I don't have anything.
Oh.
That'll be a pretty low-key Friday.
By the way, Parks has been out of town all week,
and he's at Disney World having the time of his life.
Dude.
He's having the time of his life.
Look lit.
I FaceTimed him last night, and he was giving me updates on the day.
He's thriving.
Are they doing Harry Potter Land or whatever?
Harry Potter World?
I'm not sure.
Harry Potter.
They're bouncing around doing a lot.
Sick.
I am unfamiliar with the layout of Disney World or how it all works.
I know there are different places in the world.
Well, there's the Magic Kingdom, and then you can go over to Epcot.
There's Animal Kingdom.
Uh-huh.
Universal something.
Universal Studios, whole different scenario.
Okay.
Not owned by Disney.
Again, I don't know how it all works, but he's apparently hitting everything.
Dave and I are going to Harry Potter World for spring break next year.
Spiff Gidari?
No kids, just vibes.
Oh, man, I'm so in on that.
Y'all aren't going.
Dude, it's going to be so fucking sick.
Y'all aren't going.
Dave, do the spell thing.
Randy's in, too.
Yep.
Saturday, I stepped out a little bit, went to Deep Eddie Cabaret.
Familiar.
That was fun.
What was on tap?
I got a pitcher of Miller Lite, and it was not even that cold.
It didn't spray down your throat either, I bet.
And there was glaring lack of vortex.
They started putting vortexes in pitchers,
but they were just spraying into the ceiling of bars
and giving them water damage.
That's tough. And, yeah, yeah yesterday all-time lazy day it was my ideal sunday weather day
sorry to say to the folks up north here whether it's been a little bit more extreme but it was
just a rainy gloomy sunday which i love it was a very lazy day for me i took a nap i went to bed
very early and i watched a little lord of the rings and it was listen to
you it was great what a day i slept for 10 hours last night major shire vibes in your bedroom when
you were watching a lot of shire vibes in my bedroom it's a cozy movie it's a cozy trilogy
what's up with those creepy guys on the horses man yo yo what's up with that don't have any
faces and shit they used to be men
you're somewhere between living and dead
that's how i feel most of the time dude just wait goblin mode okay and that concludes my
weekend in fun gentlemen do you have any food in your bed while you're watching lord of the rings
i did i did what'd you hit i made uh i put together i had some
some dry italian sausage i cut it up and i cut some irish cheddar and i put it on a little uh
nut thin cracker and i was not expecting a bedside charcuterie board i had about demon i had about
seven of those and it was it was perfect wow that's real muncher shit dude that's good that's
good i had an early dinner so i was like i know i'm gonna be i'm gonna get snackish later so i had a hearty hearty snack were you snacking
i was snacking this was at like 8 30 wow wow sally made a bowl of vanilla ice cream while
we were watching next level chef last night she tossed in some wild cards ready for this yeah
chocolate covered almonds that she had crunched up daddy and some
cereal what kind of cereal honey nut chiming out that's the move if you're gonna do it that's what
you gotta do i don't know had we had some fruity pebbles i wouldn't have said no fruity pebbles
are gas it's a color play yeah that sounds delightful pardon me a little yawning it's okay hey man i am yawning my weekend really kicked off
about uh oh i don't know 2 p.m on friday 2 p.m on friday i went to uh rock golf we did a video from
rock golf a few months back if you'll remember you remember remember that, Randy? I remember that. Remember the audio? I remember...
You don't.
I remember Will was there.
He was there.
He was...
Will and Dylan were like
number one, number two,
best pretend golfers.
Just blew me out of the water.
Anyway, we ran it back.
Brett hit us with a wild card text.
I mean, myself and our buddy Ryan.
He's like,
hey, let's do...
Y'all want to do rock golf today?
I was like,
maybe, yeah.
Come to find out the original location closed.
They have a new location in Westlake right next to the bento box place that we used to go to.
Oh, major shout, dude.
Great spot, by the way.
Yeah, that's a great spot for it.
Went, had a good time, had a few beers,
picked up a Lupe tortilla for the fam. Sat at the bar, had some beers.
I did.
Did Brett tell you the last thing I said before leaving the office on Friday?
He did not.
Because I can't even – I've been trying to actively go on a golf trip,
like pretty hardcore lately, just like any golf trip.
I wrote a column about it for Washed Weekly, washed.substack.com.
And when I found out that I couldn't even get an invite to a virtual golf session from Brett,
my last parting words from leaving the office were just,
fuck you, walked out.
I got the invite.
I got like the pity invite later.
I jumped over Brett's head,
and I just texted Dave and our friend GFOP Ryan
and let them know that I'm aware of the situation,
and even though I can't go, I'm not happy about this.
Brett's got something.
He's cooking something up for Wash Weekly.
And I think there's...
Oh, yeah.
He's got a couple of y'all on his crosshairs.
I think it's the two of us.
And I don't really know why.
Good.
It is.
I don't know what it's about.
I don't know either.
He told me I was safe.
I was safe too.
I'm not even privy to this.
I didn't.
I didn't know.
Okay.
I'm going to be in the draft just looking
I'm sure it's going to be like 9,000 words
Yeah I'm sure he'll have to edit it down
I'm sure I'm going to finish the column
I'm going to post it next week
He'll post it in June
Big sports
Big sports weekend
Watched a lot of sports
I drank Red Stripe all weekend I had like 12 not 12 i had eight in my
fridge and i went three friday two saturday so yeah i had five beers you're a fucking savage dude
and that's not counting the two i had while waiting on food at lupe tortilla they weren't
red stripe but they were beers so i a significant amount of beer for myself.
Saturday we did T-Ball.
It continues to be – progress is being shown.
The whole team, they're coming together.
They're becoming a team that you can count on.
They're not chasing the ball after they hit it,
which is a huge step in the right
direction. They've learned to run to first. Now, I'm worried about them chasing it before they hit
it, brother. Hey, brother, man. Don't hit anything out of the zone. It's not a tee. Yeah, it doesn't
move much. No, not a lot. Running from first to second is a little tough. A lot of kids,
mine included, they kind of just want to run right to third. Well, it's because their natural motion is taking them there's right-handed hitters you know that's right
it's what's closest to home like they want to score i get it i get it yeah no it's they're
just they don't know about the grind yet i'm like dude bro little man can they steal at this age
can you imagine imagine the catcher gunning him down at second base at that age oh there's not
a catcher you'll be shocked to learn there's no one behind the plate other than the coach perfect time to run dude showing them
how to hold the bat yeah yeah um what a treat though uh what else did we do that's about it man
it was uh it was fairly low key it was very low key weather saturday morning just unexpected
severe weather thought we were gonna miss out on it, but no.
I was showering and I had my window open because the ventilation is not great in our bathroom.
So I was letting some of the steam out.
And there was a crack of thunder that was one of the most jarring cracks of thunder
I've ever experienced in my entire life.
It was loud.
Yeah.
I almost fell down in the shower.
We had power flashes.
And I saw on Twitter that the neighborhood, close close to ours did not have power the entire day.
So we narrowly missed out on that.
Not good.
No.
No.
I will yield my time to you, Will.
Big weekend.
Big, big old weekend.
Here's the thing.
I had a tweet on Friday afternoon.
Actually, Friday morning.
It said the ops are worried about what's going to happen to the 11 Modellos in my fridge
that are left over from my son's birthday party last weekend.
I got some big news.
There's only 10 left.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, my God.
There's only 10 of these left.
Did you just sip that one throughout the weekend?
You put your one up?
I slow sipped it.
It was like a pizza that you order, and I just picked at it all weekend. You grazed one up? I slow sipped it. It was like a pizza that you order and I just picked at it
all weekend. You grazed on that beer.
Finished it last night.
Really good beer.
I went to a new restaurant in town right
down the street from our office called Elementary.
Have you guys been here before? Yeah, I've been really
intrigued by it. Yeah,
it's all elementary school themed. Oh, did you get the
carrots? That's
what they serve, carrots.
No, I didn't get any carrots, Randy.
They didn't have it on the menu.
Is the food good?
The food was really, really good.
Randy, what happened, dude?
Yeah, dude.
You just got fucking, you just got swatted to hell. We talked about the menu before on this podcast.
It literally says carrots?
It says carrots.
You just got sent home night one.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
The Kiewitz? You didn't get
the Kiewitz. No, they
didn't have any Kiewitz on the menu.
But we did order the schnitzel, Dave.
And I will say that outside of the
chicken piccata at Sammy's, it might be the most comforting
meal currently going in Austin, Texas.
Okay. Get it before the weather gets
too hot because it is a nice,
nice cold weather meal.
92 today.
I also had a smoked paper plane.
Are you familiar with paper plane cocktails?
This is something I didn't know about until recently.
I'm unfamiliar.
It's just a normal cocktail.
It tastes really good, but it was very randy.
They serve it with a little paper bird on it.
And then they set it on fire at the table. And then they set it on fire at the table.
Love when they set things on fire at the table.
It's just an excuse to charge seven extra dollars for the drink.
It was worth it.
I had a good time.
I had a good time.
And then Saturday was all about the Verde, dude.
Went to the Q2 stadium in Austin, Texas.
Got some tickets the day of the game.
Sat down.
Saw two goals immediately in front of us. I mean, the lads were buzzing, Texas. Got some tickets the day of the game. Sat down. Saw two goals immediately in front of us.
I mean, the lads were buzzing, boys.
We got to get on this Austin FC train before it gets full.
I'll say right now, it's not full.
And then, yeah, casual Sunday, hanging out.
Just vibed a little bit.
Have two sons that just don't want to nap lately.
So it's just going through the ringer constantly.
Austin FC question.
Are they not selling
out like they were oh they i think it was technically a sellout but if you looked around
there were some there were a good amount of empty seats good amount of empty seats i bought a little
jersey for uh fritz man he's just big on the jersey train right now yeah it was a fun fun match
i want to go to more not a lot of games that i can make in the next few weeks though so i'll
keep you guys posted.
But yeah, shut it down last night.
Cleaned the entire place.
New sheets.
Just elite vibes in the bedroom.
Just hanging.
Watch Next Level Chef before just dozing off.
Chilling.
Wait, so when Sally is eating vanilla ice cream in bed, are you not?
I partook.
Okay.
I partook, yeah partook yeah it was it
was during the next like i like to eat something during next level chef is the the show makes me
hungry um and so yeah i went about my business i stood on business and ate some ice cream in bed
that's my weekend that's sick yeah dude that's so you're not standing on business when you're
eating your cheese board in bed i was on on business. I was on business, yeah.
Okay.
I had two early birds yesterday.
The same time?
No.
I took one at 6.30 and one at 8.
Fucking hero dose?
Dude, you don't need to be hero dosing. I was just keeping it going, dog.
Are you a hero dose CBD?
I was so cozy in my bed.
Is that why you texted me at like 11 p.m.?
You're like, dude, I think I'm getting the visualizations.
I was dead asleep by 11 we got a new rare for me i'm proud of you thank you we got a new sponsor alert new sponsor we have a we have a new sponsor we've all been there boys okay you're
sitting in your bed when all of a sudden you see a huge bug in your room guess what not a big bug
guy over
here. So I usually have to have Sally handle that kind of stuff. She's the native Texan here,
which means that she's used to battling those big dogs. I prefer my bugs outside the home.
Dude, the bugs in Texas are so different compared to the bugs everywhere else.
Really? Yes. In what way?
They're huge here. They're scary here, dude.
Dude, everything's bigger in Texas.
Yeah. It's because of the water.
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I have this thing next to our bed.
It's an old house.
Uh,
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So I get little bugs that start crawling in and they started freaking me
out.
And I was like,
Sally,
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Like,
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And luckily for me,
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I got to apologize.
I zoned out thinking about how I need to cancel our pest service because we just got pesti.
Yeah, you do.
And that's why I was just like, oh, shit, I got to cancel that.
Yeah, you do.
Completely, completely lost train of thought there.
Pesty's about to step in.
It's a great sponsor.
I'm very excited for them.
It is.
I'm a little worried about that window.
It's kind of annoying, dude.
It's kind of annoying.
It's fine now because of pesty, but it was a little concerning the first night that I
realized that I saw bugs crawling in.
No, you eat like eight spiders a year. I don't believe that.
I believe it. Oh, I believe it.
How many legs is that?
Eight times eight would be
64.
Last I checked. Good job.
Thank you. Yeah, but you gotta think if they're going
in your mouth, they got death wishes. They might have
seven or six legs. That's just not where I would
go if I was a spider. That's not a real thing. If I was a spider that's not a that's not a real thing if i was a spider i would absolutely
want to be my hot little mouth okay it just seems like uh you're kind of okay with ending things if
you go into the mouth they don't come from my mouth when i'm awake why would they do it when
i'm asleep because you're asleep yeah probably because you're less resistance yeah have you ever been like oh shit that spider's trying to get my shit no it's a it's a made up it's a made up thing to
scare people it's a scare tag you can tell yourself that it's cute how you're telling
yourself what's the benefit i don't know of scaring people about the cider mouth someone
some just funny guy made it up and everyone just went with it like oh it must be good protein
whatever it's true you know they's good protein. Whatever, dude.
It's true.
You know they're making protein out of crickets.
I saw it on Shark Tank.
Is that real?
Yeah.
That's very real.
Shark Tank, there were some dudes that went on and they decided they were going to pitch
their company that was just protein bars made out of crickets.
Which, like, obviously I'm not big on the protein stuff or, you know, health supplements,
things of that nature.
big on the protein stuff or you know health supplements things of that nature but even if i was i don't think i think i'd rather take like you know muscle holocaust than uh i'm doing some
research on the spider thing i'll get back to you guys okay get back i think i think with uh
will.0 that we're about to talk about i think you might be in on something yeah so uh you know a few
months back probably probably almost a year at this point, Dylan and I decided to play a game of odds.
And that game of odds was to decide who had to get some lines in their head.
Can I real quick?
You may.
Okay.
According to Encyclopedia Britannica, remember those guys?
Yeah.
Okay.
Familiar with their game. The belief that we swallow an average of eight spiders in our sleep every year has become
so ingrained in our popular culture that many people now accept it as fact.
The reality, however, is quite different.
We swallow no spiders at all.
Oh, man.
They know that every person in the world.
You're believing Encyclopedia Britannica.
I told y'all.
Over us.
No, that sounds like they're resorting to fake news because they're on their way out.
That just never made sense to me.
They're freaked out, dude.
Yeah.
Legacy Media.
You might have seen me do it.
You're always right.
They've been replaced with podcasts.
They're freaked the fuck out.
We got to say crazy shit.
So don't worry.
You're not swallowing any spiders in your sleep.
Please, dude.
Please.
Do you sleep with your mouth open?
No.
I tape my shut. Just say you do. I sleep with your mouth open uh no you're my you do just say you do i sleep with a mouth guard it's like so bulky and it's so annoying really yeah what's that for
so i don't mess up my my fake teeth up front oh god yeah it's not like a chastity belt
on your mouth dylan can you explain why we had the odds was parks wanting lines in his
hair or something parks got lines in his hair and then i think we decided that it was like
was he embarrassed about getting lines or did he just want to get them no he wanted to get them and
then he did a one and done he's like okay i got that out of my system i need to do it again now
he's growing a shag and it looks dope well so i lost the bet and i had to get lines in my head
what was the bet it was just odds it was just oh we just did odds and you and
you beat me got it and so i had to get lines in my head and i haven't done it yet it's been it
seems like a pretty minimal thing but i haven't gotten my haircut in a few months and so i i
proposed that what if i took the flow in the back and left it there and i get a mullet. Would this be appropriate to do?
And Dylan said,
yes,
almost immediately,
which kind of shocked me.
Well,
I have some,
um,
stipulations.
I have some,
some bet debt building up.
So are you trying to play nice by allowing me to get out of this with a
mullet instead of something harsher because you think that we're going to be nicer to you if i get my two-hole bleach will that absolve me of all of
my my my bet debt if it was if it was recorded in a tasteful way i would say it would absolve you
but i think that in order to they've got something to do it we need to have something
we need to have something on video look on day's face right now folks never would have thought will would have done the lines before dylan oh if i get the two hole done
am i am i good am i clear does it wipe everything away if you do it on video i don't know how the
bleach works but i think yeah it gets rid of a lot of bacteria yeah video camera now do you know
if you need a white i don't want to you probably still need a white i don't want the content out
there in video form it's just your face yeah it's just your face as it's having a live reaction oh yeah it'll be literally be from the front if i could set up someone to do
it for free would you do it i got a guy yes it's brett's keg guy actually keg guy doubles as a as
a two-hole bleach guy okay so you're doing this when today i have a i have a haircut appointment
at 1 30 today yes i've never received a different haircut from Teresa who cuts our hair.
So I'm a little worried that she's going to be like, I'm not doing that for you.
Why are you doing this?
But I think she has to.
Is that her place to tell you she won't do it?
I don't know.
I mean, she has a right to refuse.
Don't tattoo artists turn people down all the time?
How short are you going to go on the sides?
I don't know.
I think pretty short.
Like a skin fade?
So I have a couple reference pics.
No.
I asked Twitter and twitter did
a horrible job of giving me any anything of value um i did get one person that dm me who did this
themselves and he had a pretty tasteful mullet and so i might use his pic as a reference and
then i had barrett isolate one photo of a guy with a beard who has a pretty good mullet that
we could try to replicate so i I have a couple of picks.
I'm going to show her, see how it goes.
I will say there might be some chatter about whether or not my hair is long enough.
I think this back is long enough to constitute a mullet right now. It's long enough.
It sticks out in the back like perfectly for a mullet.
Yeah.
So she might need to cut the dead ends off there.
What do they call them?
Split ends?
Split ends.
I think I got some split ends back there.
You don't have any split ends.
Come on, dude.
I think I have split ends.
No. Split ends. I have split ends. Okay. You have split ends split ends i think i got some split ends back there come on i think i have split ends no split ends i have split ends okay you have split ends well so okay because i'm doing this for you dylan do you have any stipulations you like to put on this like do i need to have this
for a certain amount of time because the original deal that i made with sally is that I would keep this until after the sphere, which is when
may the sphere is, I will be arriving at the sphere two weeks from Thursday.
So I will have this for two and a half weeks as I will get it cut probably the Monday after the
sphere. That's sufficient. Okay. Yeah. That'll work for me. My biggest concern about this is
that my mom's least favorite current golfer is Cam Smithith why because he has a mullet oh she hates his hair oh no um my one of my favorite
current golfers is uh cam smith because he has a mullet right you guys differ there my mom is
doing a surprise vid not surprised but a it was, not very much time was given to us before she
said she was coming into town. And so she will be here this Thursday and she is going to absolutely
hate me this weekend. And so that is going to be the biggest thing that I have to deal with
throughout this process. She, she's going to love you no matter what. I don't think she will,
Dylan. I think I'm gonna have to wear a hat like the entire weekend. She might disown you. I don't
think she's going to disown me. I mean, I'm 30 mean i'm 30 i'm 37 years old uh she really really likes me well it's gonna look good yeah
i mean i'm excited i'm like really excited for this i'm kind of thinking the aussies next door
might give me some cred i feel like i feel like a lot of aussies have like mullets because they're
wild boys you know okay i'm smith nobody's wilder than the wild boys that's true no i think i think it's gonna
look good on will i don't think it's dylan i don't if you were to do this i don't think it would work
mullet yeah first of all i don't know how the back of your hair grows i know you've had shaggy
hair in the past but will seems to grow like perfectly shaggy where it doesn't get you know
brett grows straight down it's kind of will's kind of flares out and gives him that, what's the
word? Coif? Coif? Coif. No, Coif. It's Coif. It's Coif. Okay. I don't know what it would look like
for you, but I'm going to give you an option. Would you do a Google image search of South
Dallas Shag? I'll absolve you of all bets, but you have to do a South Dallas Shag. Randy,
why don't you pull it up too? Oh, that's what you want me to do um a south dallas shag randy once you pull it up
to oh that's what you want me to do yeah just do that and i'll absolve you of all bets but you have
to do it that is not a good hairstyle what do you mean it doesn't look good i think it looked good
on you i don't see any uh caucasians in any of these pictures it might i don't know why that
matters i don't want to, you know.
Do you not want to do it because you're not from South Dallas?
You don't want to steal valor?
You don't want to appropriate South Dallas culture?
I don't want to appropriate their culture.
That's understandable.
Also not from South Dallas.
Dude, I kind of think this is kind of cool.
Come on, man.
Take your hat off.
Oh, man.
I feel like it works for you. It does kind of work. I don't have the ha cool. Take your hat off. Oh, man. I just, I feel like it works for you.
It does kind of work.
I don't have the hairline to pull this off.
You got to go short up front.
I'm not doing that.
Word's not going to grow back.
Let me just bleach my tool.
What's the bet I still have to do?
I still have to do the combine video.
I still, I will do it.
This company has a major problem, like paying off.
Yeah, we do.
That one on the right.
Yeah, we do.
That's not good. It's fucking. It's good on the right. Yeah, we do. That's not good.
It's good.
It's not.
It's good.
That's sick.
All right, Dylan.
Fine.
I was trying to give you a way out.
Well, my mullet reveal
will be on Patreon tomorrow
during Do You Know It?
A game show podcast
beyond the paywall
hosted by Randy Trembacki.
And made possible by you,
the Patreon subscriber at home. i know i don't know
if theresa's down to do bits but i would i would kind of want to see video of her reacting to what
you're going to tell her she'll understand she knows what we do for a living it's a content
play she gets it she gets it she's a real one she understands i'm not too worried i'm excited for
this do you think fritz will know do you think he'll know that i look different yes do you think She's a real one. She understands. I'm not too worried. I'm excited for this.
Do you think Fritz will know?
Do you think he'll know that I look different?
Yes.
Do you think he'll know that I look like white trash?
Yes.
Okay.
No, I think it's more Euro trash at this point, right?
Maybe.
Who has control of the mullet right now?
Which demographic?
I think fuckboys.
Is it just a fuckboy play yeah i think the fuck boys
have it there are kids in uh in parks is little league who have who have mullets like several of
them yeah babies i think it's been it's become a lot more popular with uh like toddlers and stuff
too like it's it's people are just doing it to their kids yeah i think it's funny it's kind of
funny and it kind of is i like it because they can't they don't they can't pick for themselves
you know it's like no i want my kid to have a mullet.
I've seen that with Mohawks.
It's fuckboys, though.
Okay.
I'm going to have some big motion after this.
You are going to have big motion.
What if he becomes a big stepper?
What if he just turns into a total fuckboy?
Which is hard to do when you're married, I get it.
But still, you can- What if?
I mean, it's still a fuckboy behavior.
It's possible, yeah.
We don't know.
It's true.
We don't know.
Probably not happening.
He's just a total asshole. It makes you look like an asshole. We didn't even talk about this. What if he becomes the, it's possible. It's still a fuckboy behavior. It's possible. Yeah, we don't know. It's true. We don't know. Probably not happening. He's just a total asshole.
It makes you look like an asshole.
We didn't even talk about this.
What if he becomes the new Riz King?
Okay.
Did you think about that?
It's still the haircut of assholes.
Did you hear about Will?
He rizzed up Dave's little whiskey girl.
Fucking real problems around here.
My aura's going to be different. It's true. It's going to be heavy. That's true. aura's going to be different.
It's true.
It's going to be heavy.
That's true.
It's going to be heavy.
Hey, I was just talking about Mother's Day, or my mom.
And I'm probably going to ruin her day by getting a mullet.
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the gift that keeps on giving. We all got one, and we all love it, baby. I'm not sure there's a better
gift for parents than the Aura Frame. I think think you're probably right load that shit up for them like oh my god look at my
babies whoa or is a gift for your parents or if you're my dad you'd put pictures of your car on
that's the coolest thing about your dad dude that is so tight that is so tight i'm glad he figured
it out i like the idea of me giving this to my parents, and they just put random photos of things
that makes them happy.
Like my mom just has a photo of Willie Geist on there.
Your dad has his garden on there?
Yeah, my dad.
Yeah, not even his, just other inspo pics.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You can put anything you want on there.
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I love this thing.
Even my son likes looking at it whenever it catches his eye.
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Turns and conditions do apply.
All right, so I've been talking a lot lately about male friendship.
You guys have heard me talk about it.
Yeah, it's tough as we get older.
Kind of started as a bit and has kind of, you know,
actually started to own some real estate in my brain.
So I was like, I got to do some research on this.
And I saw a post on Reddit that said that someone
who's having trouble maintaining friendships.
Says, I feel so lost at this moment.
My college friends have really been passive aggressive
and petty towards me over the past few months
and I'm trying to look for new friends.
I've been reaching out to people
I want to be closer to in undergrad,
but the only things we talk about are school.
How do I tell these people
I want to be actual friends with them
and not just acquaintances?
Should I look for completely new friends instead?
I'm so confused.
You guys, I mean, we've all been there.
How do you make friends
when you're getting older in life? And I didn't really know what to do until i got to the comment section
can i read some of the comments for you guys uh this one says have you looked into trying to play
ball golf i knew it uh this one says you should start uh you should think about starting a small
to mid-sized podcast this person said have you tried running for president as a hot dog? That's so specific.
Stupio said,
try throwing a fat ass dip in.
That does help.
It will make you
a little more social.
These aren't going to help at all.
This is terrible advice.
I know you wrote a call
about this the other day,
but the endless enjoyment
that I get out of
the post-grad problem subreddit
of just our listeners
doing bits towards people
that are actually looking for life solutions is so good to me. I'm afraid that my column has just
added a little fuel to the fire here. People are just swarming to the page and just giving the
worst bit-related advice imaginable. So I am the admin of post-grad problems still.
Should I like change the icon of this to like not our old logo or do I just let this ride out?
I think you never touch it.
I think you never touch it.
Do we feel bad for the people that are like looking for solutions on Reddit that are just getting served like jokes the entire time about us?
Why do people keep coming back?
There should be some things that when they go to this page that – first of all, the logo.
Why is there a logo for this thing?
And they should realize something's up.
This is some sort of content play,
right?
Well,
someone here said,
I recommend checking out fun on weekdays on Facebook.
They usually have them in your area and you can just make a post and people are usually super excited to meet others.
Well,
that's been downvoted to the negatives.
And it says,
and the,
the OP for that said this sounds
like a great idea thank you so much and like just no we're not actually doing real stuff here
every comment section on this page mentions throwing a huge ass dip in well have these
people actually tried it fat ass dip why haven't these people tried it well we don't know it's
it's typically not the first place you
go when you're looking to make friends but i could see why like hey you got a spitter it's a good
intro nice icebreaker that's true i can't get a pinch that's what i would say you have to be so
down bad to search for like a post-grad reddit yeah sign into your account type out this paragraph about how you're
just having trouble making friends or you know maintaining friends and then you just have a
bunch of dudes that used to read this one website that just fuck with you it keeps catching people
though yeah it caught 23 female right here just getting roasted she's having a tough go at it man
Just getting roasted.
She's having a tough go at it, man.
It hard to say is a real common one here.
Like, oh, people are commenting on my post.
I must be getting some good feedback.
Every time I click on one and there's actual advice from like non-Circling Back people,
I get a little disappointed.
Yeah, it's like, what's your problem?
Misopportunity here. How many people have subscribed to this not realizing that it's connected to an old blog?
It has 2.2K members currently.
I like this advice.
She's asking for some advice.
I don't know.
I don't care.
It says, try some nicotine.
Word on the street that it makes deal closing frictionless.
That's good.
Brett's never been in a better spot than he is right now.
The moderators are you and the Chili's guy.
Yeah, the Chili's guy, dude. Yeah. You remember Chili's now. The moderators are you and the Chili's guy. Yeah, the Chili's guy, dude.
Yeah.
You remember Chili's guy?
I do.
Yeah, shout out Chili's guy.
I don't think he's still around.
I don't think he's checking it too much anymore.
Yeah, I don't think many people are going to that subreddit that often.
I mean, you could put like a description like former blog or something.
Nah.
Or just leave it.
I think you just leave it untouched personally.
I think if this person is trying to get some new friends,
I think they should just do an eating challenge in a public park.
We talked last week about the dude who was eating potato salad at a cemetery.
Have you guys seen the guy who ate a thing of cheese balls this weekend?
I did see this over weekend.
In New York City?
Yes.
Pretty impressive work from our guy here.
I don't know why this is catching on, but it really is.
A guy just posted a photo wearing a, what are those called?
Balaclava?
It's a ski mask?
It's a bank robber mask.
Yeah.
Balaclava.
And he just says, watch me eat this entire jar of cheese balls.
Union Square Park, April 27, 3 p.m.
With a QR code and a photo of him holding the cheese balls.
And sure enough, he did some numbers, boys. Does he put them all through the hole in his mask okay yeah every single one he uh he
made a spectacle out of as he brought it to his lips and i kind of respect the showmanship here
would this be a good fantasy football punishment oh god you have a mask on it would be it'd be
really easy to pull off and not really have like that... You know he felt like total shit the morning after.
I don't know, man.
We used to get these things, cheese balls, in the Grand X office,
and you could knock a lot of those out.
You used to show up to meetings all the time in the conference room
with a bunch of Cheeto dust all over your mustache.
I never touched those things.
I always wanted to, but I didn't.
I never existed.
That made cheese balls in a jar, like 500?
I was wondering the same thing.
I'm trying to think how long this went on,
and at some point where people are like,
all right, well.
It went on, I saw the video and they had timestamps.
It lasted probably less than 30 minutes.
This guy died with them.
Yeah.
Oh, so he wasn't just taking each one and just showing it to the crowd and popping it
in.
He was stuffing his face.
I'm trying to scan the QR code right now, but I... Oh, here we go.
Does it work?
No, it's not...
Dude, my phone is just the worst.
It doesn't even scan QR codes at this point.
Shout out to iPhone 15 Pro.
This is officially a trend now.
After we had the rotisserie chicken guy,
the potato salad guy,
the cheese ball guy.
If I start putting up photos of me holding a giant
jar of pickles and a green balaclava and i say zilker park 3 p.m saturday people will show up
i'm the guy with the mullet and the balaclava i'm eating pickles how many people would show up how
many pickles you eat you got to make it worth their time oh you can't just eat like 10 pickles
you got to do like like. I can do 50.
You can't eat 50 pickles.
Well, I could do 50.
I'm going to be really swollen the next day from all the salt.
What kind of pickles?
I'm going classic.
Dill.
Dill, dude.
I'm not doing sweet pickles.
Just a full dill pickle.
I'm not trying to make my life miserable.
Yellow five or no?
A little bit of yellow five in there, yeah.
Yeah.
I like to dose my pickles with some yellow five.
What if we had someone dress up in a suit and a certain hot dog costume?
Eating glizzies by the park?
Saturday.
There's already a guy who eats a lot of hot dogs.
El Glizadentes.
Yeah.
A little rally in Silker.
Let's go.
You know how those rallies turn out?
What if I eat like five?
I can't eat a lot of hot dogs. Surround yourself with tiki torches. I's go. Like, I can only... You know how those rallies turn out. What, am I going to eat like five? I can't eat a whole lot of hot dogs.
Surround yourself with tiki torches.
I could easily do nine hot dogs in a baseball game.
I'm positive I could.
Dollar dog night, you could take down ten.
I think I could do nine.
I could do one in an inning, I think.
I don't think it'd be that difficult.
I'm never done with a hot dog being like,
oh, I could not eat another hot dog.
Ballpark dogs are so good.
I've done four on dollar dog night.
I had four on Saturday night.
Just for fun?
Yeah, that was my dinner.
That was your weekend in fun?
Thanks, Randy.
It was four hot dogs and an apple.
Do you have your own grill?
The apple just balanced it out?
Yeah, but I boiled them.
Okay.
You didn't have to offer that information up.
You boiled them, huh?
Why wouldn't you grill them if you got a grill?
Well, because I have to walk all the way to the pool and I didn't want to. Okay, I didn't know if you huh? Why wouldn't you grill it if you got a grill? Well, because I have to walk all the way to the pool, and I didn't want to do it.
Okay.
I didn't know if you had your own grill on your patio or if you had a community grill.
It's a great way to meet people.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, male friendship.
Yeah.
Or you can do that or just throw a fat-ass dip in.
Throw a fat-ass dip in instead.
Or you can just start a small to mid-sized podcast.
True.
That's all you have to do.
Or invest in BTS, apparently.
How mad would you be if this ends with a face reveal?
And it's like- It's your girlfriend? Or it's my wife, yeah. How mad would you be if this ends with a face reveal? And it's like...
It's your girlfriend?
Or it's my wife, yeah.
Jonah Hill.
It's Rudy Giuliani.
Just like the mask.
Okay, I don't think it's...
Okay.
Who is the other one?
Who is the...
It was the kidnapping victim?
I can't remember.
I just remember Rudy Giuliani was a big one.
What if this was like Michael Rapaport?
I don't know.
I'm thinking of New York people. He's the first one that could pop into your head uh yeah
i was just thinking about like uh over the top new york people i think it'd be cool if it was
dan rapaport that would be cool what kind of people show up to this and why do you care well
i mean once you have a few people standing around and you see the guy with the mask on and the thing
you automatically know something's about to go down.
You're just going to eat these?
And then what?
Then you just got to pull out the phone and hope that something goes down.
Then you just go home?
No, I think you got to go to the afters after this.
I don't know if there's an after.
I think there's an after, dude.
Got to go to the after.
What are you looking up, Dave?
I was looking to see who the Masked Singer reveals were. Because Randy did mention it was Rudy Giuliani at one point.
There was one that was really shocking.
They've scrubbed the Giuliani season from the internet.
Why did they think that was going to be a good idea?
Well, he was likable at once.
Then he turned into the Penguin.
People didn't like i mean his
he stopped being america's mayor like 20 years ago he coasted on it for a while hey are you
guys following cheeseball man 427 yet on the grom not yet dude but i'm gonna sprint right there
actually i need to see how many followers cheeseball you gotta think not that many the
thing you think 426 was taken?
The bit's done.
What is he going to post about?
Do you think he's got a K next to his name or not?
No.
No.
The suspense is killing me from Instagram right now.
Is it moving slow?
Ooh, I got bad news for you, Dylan.
He's got 10.3K.
That's not fair.
What are you expecting from the page?
Dude, his last post has 33,000 likes. That's not fair what do you what are you expecting dude his last post has 33
000 likes what that's not translating like it should no he's doing absolute numbers dude but
why is he only at 10k because he's new he's got to run it back he's new he will run it back dude
he did at the very end of his thing he said i got one question for y'all same time next year so he's
gonna do it next year he says it says on here he's doing it next year.
Good for him.
All right.
You can't wait 12 months to do this again.
People are going to lose interest.
No, you got to build the hype.
Do you think there's going to be potential copycats?
Like, how do you police that?
I mean, you can buy one of those masks anywhere.
Anyone can wear that mask.
Yeah.
And buy the cheese balls.
What are they going to do if they see me just buying cheese
balls and a mask at the local bodega and suddenly i'm this guy like oh you the guy i'm cheese ball
man 428 cheese balls are fucking good yeah i feel like this happened all the time back in the day
like you'd have imposters like uh i got really into the uh the assassination of jesse james
after i watched the movie again and
i went back and was looking and it turns out there's like a hundred people who claim to be
robert ford who like assassinated him because they couldn't really you know you could just say it no
one had any way of knowing hey i'm robert ford i assassinated this song's about the assassination
of jesse james how's she doing any more heat mary cutter i'm gonna follow her i followed her
i'm going some heat sally's pretty annoyed with how often i watch her videos i thought she was
all in no sally's more all in i'm just trying to figure out why this girl has so many songs out
it's a great question yeah mary cutter you just got a new follower ma'am elizabeth smart was the
masked singer at one point, the kidnapping victim.
She thought that was a really random...
Maybe that's what they're going for.
Yeah.
No one's guessing that.
No, literally no one.
I'd be too scared to guess that.
You're like, I think it's Elizabeth Smart, but like...
If it's not, do I look like a weirdo?
Yeah.
She's guessing Elizabeth Smart.
Is it more weird to be wrong about that or right?
Yeah.
Hey, is that Casey Anthony underneath there?
I think it's Casey Anthony.
Should we just pay one whatever panel person
to just guess wild-ass names the entire time?
Is it fair game to make fun of JoJo Siwa yet?
Well, her dance move's been taking over my timeline.
Have you seen what she's been doing
just the i mean she's got the cringiest dances of all time hey i'm uh she's uh she's also been
accused of stealing a song straight up from a tiktoker like really the tiktoker put out the
song like the lyrics are all the same everything's the same and she just released it and so i don't
know if anything's come of that but like she... She's just so over the top, so extra with everything she does.
Is she not performing with KC anymore?
I think that's a different JoJo.
What's happening here?
I don't...
I'm not familiar with her game.
Her name sounds like you're doing Pledge Voice.
Do you honestly not know about her?
Do you like JoJo Siwa?
I've heard the name.
Give me the two sentences.
So she was like a children's musician.
She did music for kids, basically.
Cool.
And she grew up a little bit, and she came out of the closet.
She is a lesbian, and she is completely pivoted.
And she's like, the way she dresses, she's turned very, very cringe.
She's always been kind of cringe.
Wait, is it the dancing?
It's the dancing.
I saw some dancing.
It's the dancing mostly.
The dancing is the cringe stuff. It's just really hard to look at i mean it's a tough scene if you got the the 40 year
old podcasters saying the dancing screen no it's i promise you we're not the only ones making fun
no we're not i i saw this on tl i just i really was not familiar with the game guide od at our
sweet 16 yeah that, that sounds familiar.
Sounds familiar.
That's a lit Sweet 16.
Yeah.
Hope he's okay.
It would be really annoying if someone put a hot dog head on her dance moves.
That would be so annoying.
Wow, these are really aggressive moves.
Yeah, yeah.
It's kind of the thing.
She's kind of killing it.
Is she?
I don't know.
Are her songs good?
Yeah, dude. One Year in Prison or Cross Country Road to Earth. killing it is she i don't know are her songs good um yeah dude one year in prison yeah she's already a top my spotify for 2024 who is the band we were watching last week that the the clip from the
their little breakdown with like the horn section and the lead singer everybody was obsessed with
what is that i don't know i don't know but i watched that a thousand times
jojo siwa okay hey if that's your thing go off i'm gonna have to check out her catalog
i don't you probably won't spend too much time going through it why is that you don't think
i'm into that kind of stuff probably not you don't think i like pop music? I think you like pop music, but not this particular pop music.
Okay.
Dude, speaking of pop music, one of the radio stations had a K-pop hour long.
I might be into K-pop now. I get it.
It's fucking gas.
Yeah.
It's fucking gas.
You try it out.
Just try it out.
I don't try it out.
Go on to Spotify and put on K-pop radio
and be like
these are all bangers
find a way
we'll see about it
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i know it's already pretty hot in here, but if someone could turn up the heat.
Oh, it's kind of humid in here, too.
What's going on?
Oh, we just turned the steam on, baby.
It's almost hard to see.
Take your pants off, David.
Yeah, get your ass over here, Davey boy. Take your pants off, David.
It's weird to wear corduroy shorts in the steam room, David.
I'm going to paint that thing red.
They look good.
I'm wearing tennis shoes and socks in the steam room.
Don't do that.
Don't do that.
Told you guys.
Went to Austin FC this past weekend.
Had a really good time.
Beautiful stadium.
Team looks great.
Got to say, the Uber situation on the way home, though,
I was getting a little beaten down.
I was like, should I keep walking and just find one later?
Should I just post up somewhere?
Just wait for it to get to me?
I haven't eaten all day.
Had a little nibble for breakfast,
but I could probably use,
after having a couple light beers at the game,
I could probably use some sustenance.
Sure.
So I stopped in to a sandwich shop
I haven't been to in years.
I went to Jimmy John's.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Randy's former employer.
I loved Jimmy John's for a period of my life.
My group text at home, we've got a pizza group text i've
talked about on this program and uh the group text is very split between jimmy johns and jersey
mikes can we take a simple vote in the room right now dylan jimmy johns or jersey mikes jersey
mikes all day long dave oh jay mikes randy this is a big one a Hey, guy. No loyalty.
I got to go Jimmy John's.
Wow.
Okay.
The only thing that Jersey Mike's has above is the steak sandwich, the fillies.
I love them.
They're delicious, but they're so expensive.
I thought you were a White Sox fan.
It's good.
Yes.
Do you get your bread scooped or whatever the hell they call it?
No.
No scooping your bread, bro.
So I roll in.
I haven't been there in a while.
So I go back and I start thinking of my college days and I'm like, okay.
We used to get Vitos all the time.
Number five, Vito.
Seems to be meat heavy.
I saw three different meats on there at least, maybe even more.
Just two.
Just two.
Saw two meats on there.
Someone who was pescatarian for 10 months last year.
It's a lot of meat.
on there someone who was pescatarian for 10 months last year that's it's a lot of meat um randy uh can you please bring up the photo of uh my sandwich uh this is the sandwich i received
oh bro that's some fire fest shit what oh no what what is going on like i where's the meat like i
i i feel like i just feel like there should be more meat on this sandwich
this is the first time i've had it and probably probably since grand x that bread looks like I feel like, I just feel like there should be more meat on this sandwich.
This is the first time I've had it and probably since Grand X.
That bread looks like it's going to break my teeth
if I try to bite into it.
When I unwrapped my sandwich,
I was so excited.
I hadn't had it in years.
And I open it up and I see this cheese fold.
There's more air in the sandwich than actual stuff.
It's just devastating.
Do we need to worry?
I've heard that Sub've heard that subway i'm
sorry about for what i'm about to say dave i heard subway's been skimping lately is this just like a
is sandwich fellation a real thing it's meat fellation but fellas david
the the meat does look a little more thinly sliced i don't even see the meat
wait we got it right here this is salami and capicola.
So it's a salami.
They're very thin.
There's six slices.
There's there.
And then the capicola is here.
Randy told me to simply order better.
Randy, can you critique my order?
Because I don't know what I did wrong,
but I would like other people to learn
and maybe better moving forward.
First of all, with the Vito, it doesn't come with mayo.
So I'm going to add mayo to that every single time.
Also, I'm not going to get the Vito.
I'm going to go club sandwich.
Was it Italian nightclub?
Is Italian nightclub the upgraded Vito?
It's the same thing as this, but it comes with ham as well.
And the ham portions are usually a little bit better than the Italian portions.
But if you were still working for Jimmy John's Randy
and someone sent you a photo of this after you delivered it,
would you have trouble explaining to them what was going on?
There is a lack of lettuce on this for sure.
I will give that.
I see the onion.
There's more air than anything else.
Yeah, you got to stuff that scooped out cavity there with lettuce and everything.
If you were to find a guy named Vito, scooped out cavity,
and hand him the sandwich and be like, hey hey man, what do you think of this sandwich?
He'd punt it.
He would punt it,
and then he'd probably have your legs broken.
Yeah.
There's never been a Vito that's been satisfied by this Vito.
So this is hollowed out?
Yeah, all these subs are hollowed out automatically.
I'll be honest, I didn't request hollowed out.
That was not a Will to Freeze initiative.
All the subs are.
The one through the six are all hollowed out.
The seven and up are not hollowed out. How much bread are they wasting just hauling this these fuckers out just make
the bread thinner randy what's the ultimate order from jimmy johns like if you're trying to if you
if you let's say let's say you don't have much money in the bank account you're like i want to
stack a jimmy johns sandwich right now what's the move all right so then you don't want to go club
there you want to go sub if you try and bake I would go with the number one, Pepe.
It's the ham and cheese.
It's one of the heavier of the subs.
And then just all the freebies that you can put on it, which is.
Just drag that thing through the garden.
Yeah.
Lettuce, onions, vinegar and oil, oregano.
The thing you also didn't do here, what I would especially put some of those cherry
peppers on it.
Oh, they're so good.
So I did have the moment after
where I realized that we did used to get the Vito
with cherry peppers.
Yes.
That was very good.
Yes.
That was very good.
And they also, I don't even know,
the Jimmy John's that these days
are different than the ones I worked at.
They have like chicken breast like now,
like as in they have wraps,
they have potato salad, macaroni salad.
They don't have chicken ranch anymore.
It's jalapeno ranch now. They have brownies, macaroni salad. They don't have Kicking Ranch anymore. It's Jalapeno Ranch now.
They have brownies and stuff.
It's a completely different story.
Wow, this turned into
a Randy's steam room.
I don't know.
I don't know what I'm doing anymore.
What do they do with the bread
once it's hollowed out?
Like the actual piece
they took out?
They just throw it away
or the people on the line
just keep it in.
They should donate
to local restaurants
to make croutons out of.
Great car.
Just why don't they go
plant it?
Grow more bread.
Sandwich shop in Harbor,
you can order a sandwich
on the bread ends
for like a way cheaper rate
if that's all they have.
They run out of bread.
Really?
Yeah, I've done it.
I'm like, fuck it.
I need a sandwich.
Jimmy John's has a major
bread problem.
What are you going to do
to solve this?
Cut up to you.
As hot dog president?
Is that what you're
trying to say?
Is that the joke?
Are you going to turn
all Jimmy John's subs
into hot dogs?
Ooh, imagine a bonus hot dog just sitting right there between that.
I could get behind that.
Surely.
Yeah.
Read my lips.
No scooped subs.
That's good.
George H.W. Bush.
I don't know.
History is not my thing.
No, no taxes.
And then he changes taxes. Wow, let it be prudent. What? Hold know. History's not my thing. No, no taxes. And then he changed taxes. Let him be prudent.
What?
Hold on.
He lied.
A politician made a promise.
And they didn't make a promise.
Very publicly made a big mistake there.
These politicians are in goblin mode.
They're just doing whatever they want.
These promises rang hollow, much like the bread.
That's good.
I like it.
A torch has been passed.
I think your JFK is the best one that you do.
Oh, really?
Why?
Because he was famously assassinated?
Because he was shot in the head in public, Dylan?
What the hell, Dylan?
Okay.
No, really, it's good.
Barack is too easy.
Anyone can do Barack.
It's a little break. Dude, you crushed that. I know. Dude, it's too easy. Anyone can do Barack. It's a little bread.
Dude, you crushed that.
I know.
Dude, it's too easy.
It's so easy.
Dylan just cried.
I thought Barack was in the room.
Exactly, dude.
I thought he was here.
I think Jimmy John's.
Not enough meat.
I think Jimmy John's needs to keep their fingers out of our bread.
Let's just do impressions for the next 30 minutes okay that's fine do uh what where's this
bread who's the who do bobert but it's her at the play with her boyfriend i don't know how to do
that one day just do it do elizabeth holmes she's not a politician. Elizabeth Hayes. She could be one day. Elizabeth Hayes. I spent my time in prison.
Elizabeth Hayes.
Elizabeth Hayes.
Skip the bread.
Elizabeth Hayes.
I got a real problem with this sandwich.
This sandwich stinks, baby.
I don't like the way the cheese.
I already hate it.
It's just too much space.
I think I'm going to go to Jersey Mike's today and right the wrongs.
Oh, buddy.
If you can hold it up and see through the sandwich, they're not doing it right.
Galileo shit.
What's going on?
What are we doing here?
I would never let that happen.
Here's the thing.
I finished the sandwich.
The sandwich ended up being, like, okay.
But, like, what?
Come on.
This is really going to deter me from the next time I'm faced with a decision about what sandwich to get.
I'm just worried that Jimmy John's ain't going to be the move.
Then you opened your chip bag and it had half full.
I don't know.
Randy, I even asked you recently,
is there a Jimmy John's that delivers to our area?
Because I miss doing that.
And you said no.
I've been showing signs that I've actively wanted Jimmy John's lately.
And to have this be the result is just devastating stuff.
They get a chance to earn his business,
and this is what they give him.
You should have had the number nine, not the number five.
That's all I'm going to say. It's Freaky Fest. That to earn his business. This is what they give him. You should have had the number nine, not the number five. That's all I'm going to say.
It's Freaky Fest.
That's a funny name.
Serious sandwich.
Different place.
The one thing is.
All together.
The owner's name is Jimmy John.
Of Jimmy John's.
Jersey Mike's.
The owner's name is not Mike.
Not even sure if he's from Jersey.
It's like Gary or something.
Yeah.
It's fucked up.
He's from Ohio.
It's fucked up.
It's kind of a tough thing to do. It's hard to get over that while you're eating the sandwich i got a big portrait of jimmy john over my fireplace is that real yeah
okay did you steal it it was a closed store and they like were storing everything at our store
and they were going to throw everything away i'm like hey can hey, can I have that? And they're like, yeah.
It's just been over my fireplace.
We were at Matt's house ranch with my cousin
and she said, you actually get your picture on the wall here.
And I said, oh, if you only knew.
If you only knew.
Oh, yeah.
Tightly, it was up for a moment of time.
Dude, did I make it move when I sent the photo
to the group text the other day of my Mexican martini?
I've never craved a drink so much in my life
when you sent that.
The way that light hits at golden hour when the Mexican martini just gets set on the table.
Ooh-wee.
Ooh-wee.
That's all she wrote today.
It's the James Webb telescope, but it's the Jimmy John James Webb telescope.
I'd be fine with that.
The Jimmy Webb.
It does give scope.
That sandwich.
No sign of that exploding star yet, guys.
I'll keep you in the know though
it exploded 3 000 years ago david why don't you understand that so there is a sign of it exploding
just not in our direct vision right still understand like how they knew it was three
million years ago thousand thousand years ago because it's three thousand light years away
they can measure that can you explain to me why the oldest man-made object
appears to be 1.8 million years old
when civilization has not been around for that long?
What's the object?
Get your Britannica up, see if you can...
The Venus of Barakat Ram.
Obviously, dude, it's a piece of volcanic rock shaped vaguely like a
woman and it was found in the golan heights some experts say things 1.8 billion years no this says
230 000 years ago it's still a lot of years a little different i think a lot of years though
i listen to podcasts and i think civilization existed way before people are saying
and i'm gonna leave it at that i think i think we're like a crazy iteration yo this is all just a simulation anyway simulation would that really
change anything if you found that out what would i do differently what am i gonna do well i'd find
it out if they took us out of the simulation and we're like hey you've been in a simulation this
entire time is that in our lives completely predetermined like we can't change the outcome
no matter what it depends on you some whenever i think of life being a simulation i always think of myself as the main character which is probably something
i should unhash with like a psychiatrist and that everything is revolving around me i used to have
that um but like that's just how i think of it if i was in a simulation i'd be like all this is
tailored to me like truman show kind of shit yeah not Not that people are watching me, but just that the simulation they plugged me into
is so advanced that the world is going around me.
Yeah, I had something similar.
There's only one way to prove they have free will.
Hog reveal.
Right now, Dylan.
I don't think that's the only way.
That's the only way.
Free will.
You pointed me out specifically.
You want to see my hog.
Yeah.
Tony P. and DC did a sponsorship deal this past weekend for some sort of fizzy drink and people
were pretty upset that when he revealed that it was a drink that it wasn't his hog
comment section was pretty bummed it was not a hog reveal yeah you should do the cheeseball thing
it's already been done what are you talking about i don't know go out there do it different
what if you did a little squad on the cheese balls what if you did little smokies that's good
little smokies how many little smokies can you take down a little smokies why you can do 100
little smokies i could but like i just don't want to do that i think if you got a if you got a
cheese ball container filled with little smokies people would show up for that
yeah yeah maybe you're eating italian sausage in bed like you're you're you are who you are at
this point that's not the same as a hot dog yeah i can't run for president because it's italian but
that was stupid that was real stupid man
just spitting facts who break out a monday post. Oh, look at Brett. Look at the big post on Brett.
All right.
All right.
No more Jimmy John's talk.
Enough free pub for them.
Watch their stock price after this episode launches, though.
Probably going to tank.
Bye. you