Circling Back - Cocaine and Feral Hogs with Ross Bolen
Episode Date: November 18, 2019Dave and Dillon are joined by Ross Bolen to catch up, celebrate a very important one-year anniversary, and discuss feral hogs who destroyed 22 grand in cocaine. Support us on Patreon and receive wee...kly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter with guest Ross Bolen (2:20) November 14 was an important one-year anniversary (15:08) Cocaine and feral hogs (41:03) Dave and Dillon went to a fancy dinner hosted by Equinox (53:41) Dave got another visit from Enzo (1:04:45) Brett's Breaking News Shop Circling Back Merchandise: www.washedmedia.com/shop Stance: Get a free pair of socks at Stance.com/CIRCLINGBACK Public Rec: Go to PUBLICREC.COM/CIRCLINGBACK to get 10% off your order automatically applied at checkout. --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
What's up back boys and back girls, it's Dave, welcome to the Circling Back Podcast.
What?
You know what we say?
That's a new one to me
okay
sorry I think
outside of the box
I'm like you
go off man
that's the voice
of Dylan Chivary
Chivary
yes it is
hey Dave
thanks for having me again
happy to be here man
always a pleasure
to be in the studio
with you
it's always a pleasure
to have you tell us
that you're happy to be here
like as if
you would ever not be
would you let us know if you're like not happy to be here? Oh
Yeah, like no I'm here because I have to and not not because I want to just hear I wouldn't mind
I find what a much rather be elsewhere. Yeah, just sitting in this chair talking to you
No, I'm always happy to be here Dave. You know that hey, let's intro Brett. Oh
Brett's here. Hey, I'm wearing a scarf in the studio. Yeah, I brought always happy to be here, Dave. You know that. Hey, let's intro Brett. Oh. Brett's here.
Hey.
Brett's wearing a scarf in the studio.
Yeah, I brought the scarf out today.
It's a New York thing that everybody wears scarves.
Nobody wears scarves in Austin, I don't think.
Not a big scarf city.
Nope.
Well, hey, here we are wearing scarves.
And I thought this was going to be my oatmeal sweater for the winter.
It's not.
It's a tote.
All right, Brett, thanks a for the winter. It's not. It's a tote. All right, Brett.
Thanks a lot for that.
See you guys.
Hey, we've got a special guest today.
Yeah, Will is in Cabo.
Cabo San Lucas.
Okay, this is Monday, but we're recording it.
It's actually Thursday.
It's the voice of noted New York Times bestselling author, author of the Total Frat Move book.
Scat!
Host of Oysters, Clams, and Cockles, the Ross Boland podcast.
Were you the founder of Boland Media?
What else have you accomplished?
I was, yes.
I was the founder.
I thought your brother Sam founded it.
I founded it at one point.
Yes.
Let's go over all of your accomplishments.
Are you the CEO?
You guys want to go through my list of all the things I've accomplished in my short time here on this earth?
No, we don't have to do that.
Dude, I'm so stoked to be here right now.
I cannot even tell you how excited I am.
You and Dylan are both very stoked.
I'm way more excited than him.
I have a trivia question.
Well, yeah, I have a trivia question for you.
Okay.
Today is a momentous day.
Uh-huh.
What does today represent?
Damn.
November 14th, 2019.
Is that when the Pilgrims landed on Plymouth Rock?
Great guess.
Plymouth Rock landed on us.
Oh.
Oh, man.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Good guess, but no, that's not the answer okay i don't know dude
what is it uh it's a one-year anniversary of uh dave and i get laid off the grandstands is today
really really dude no way today yeah oh my god that happened one year ago to the day happy firing
day uh i saw i ran into uh our buddy Danny Regs Yeah Dan Regester
I'm familiar
Better known as Jackhammer
Uh huh
I ran into him at the gym
And he was very much
Aware of this fact as well
No shit
And he was like
He's like hey man
You know what today is right
And I was like
Dude you don't have to tell me
I already know
Dude what
Can I tell you something
I'll be real with you
That was a terrible
Dan impersonation
Yeah
I don't do a good Dan
I don't do good impersonations
We know that
I don't know even where I would start with attempting to do a Dan impersonation.
So I'm going to say that one's not on you.
I just always think of Dan being...
No.
Like in an argument.
No.
No.
No.
No.
Dude, I don't know any of the...
We should put him on the moon.
I don't know any of the dates, though.
Yeah, put the homeless on the moon.
That's my favorite Dan take of all time.
How to deal with the homeless, ship them to the moon.
I don't know any of the dates, bro.
I don't know...
November 14th.
The reason it's so easy
for me to look up
is because I got a gram
off that day.
Tight.
So I just go look at it
and like, oh.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
See, the only date
I really know
other than my own birthday
is the day I quit drinking
and I don't even know that.
I just know it's towards
the end of October 2017.
I don't know dates, dude.
The post I'm talking about
is actually a pretty funny one.
Well, it was taken,
the picture.
In your opinion.
The picture was taken, I don't't know two hours after we were let go and uh it's it's sad it's like you know what are you gonna do with
our lives now if you look at me i'm in my i'm in my knee brace because i had a broken leg yeah you
fucking dave has this weird cut on his forehead like i don't know what happened oh it was a oh i
scoped myself yeah so they you were
doing the pennywise thing where you bash your head against a wall over you know yeah i was so mad and
i just i just headbutted a cinder block we're trying to eat a child and so here we are newly
jobless and we're we're drinking it's cold outside i have this leg brace on dave has his big cut
across his face we're just in a really bad way. You look fucking Harry Potter over here. It was, yeah, that's what he looked like.
He was pretty funny.
Hey, well, I was still there employed,
and I was more miserable than you.
Go check me out on the Grom at D. Chivary.
In hindsight.
Are you on the Grom?
I am on the Grom.
Can you hit it for me, Dave?
Is it a Grom noise?
You got to turn the volume up, though.
Oh, fuck.
Wait, you're on the Grom?
Grom?
Add me on the Grom. Add me on the Grom at yo this i'm dave's got a roadcaster in here if you don't know
what that is it doesn't matter it's a box that you press buttons on and it makes these noises
for the show there's like 15 buttons on this fucking thing yeah we're not really good at like
seamlessly placing them like we we're it's pretty new like the the buttons and hitting the drops
like oh yeah i went kind of crazy during our spooky season pod, our Halloween pod.
Yeah.
Just dropping like what Will dubbed cum thunder.
I don't know why.
I don't know what that is, but it sounds just amazing.
It's actually just regular thunder.
I don't know where the C comes in, but I guess nobody really does.
Where the C comes in, yeah.
We're just working on getting the timing down.
We don't have the timing yet, but we'll get there.
As a guy who has only recently jumped into this same world,
I routinely yell things at my producer like,
hit it, Mike, and he'll be like, hit, which one do you want?
And we're live on Twitch for my show some of the time,
and he's like, I literally don't know what you're asking me to do.
You're Twitching?
Yeah, I've been Twitching. Big Twitch boy boy i've been twitching video games a lot i play a lot of video games dave i tried to get you on uh modern warfare i finally got it
yeah i'm on there like every night cross platforms you know that i'm on there every night the cross
platform is still buggy as fuck but we could we should play tonight or whenever you want i think
you got a pack for tomorrow tonight probably, I might have some time later.
We've got Mavs-Knicks on TNT, early game.
That's a big one.
Can we get done?
This is y'all's show.
I don't know what the fuck we're doing today.
It doesn't matter, dude.
Can we talk a little bit about the NBA?
Have you looked at our rundown?
We don't have shit.
Do I look like I've looked at your rundown?
I don't even have a computer.
They didn't even know how to find our rundown.
I had to send it to them.
Dylan only got in there like two minutes before we started.
Were you upset that I don't look at the rundown?
It was a little shocking that you don't even have a link to our rundown that we use every day.
I like to go in and just freestyle off the dome.
I can't tell you how much I respect that you didn't even have the rundown.
That's exactly the type of environment that I appreciate.
You really want to talk NBA?
I just wanted to know how Dave has been.
I know you don't want to talk NBA.
Let me turn your mic off.
I just wanted to know how he's been feeling about the season so far. I know he probably doesn't get to talk basketball very I just wanted to know how Dave has been. I know you don't want to talk NBA. Let me turn your mic off. I just wanted to know
how he's been feeling
about this season so far.
I know he probably
doesn't get to talk
basketball very much
with your ass.
If you want to catch
his hands,
you turn my mic down.
Okay?
Just saying.
I'll watch.
All right.
Anybody who wants
to catch hands,
just let me know.
I kind of do want you
to hit me at some point.
Come on.
Okay.
Before we do NBA,
can I talk about something
near and dear to my heart
and I think even Ross's heart?
Maybe, yeah, sure.
Stance, socks.
I'm wearing them right now.
Oh, God, yeah.
You think I'm not wearing mine, bitch?
I don't know.
I can't see your feet.
I actually am, too.
Oh, that's cool.
All three of us, dude?
That's crazy.
Stance make me dance.
You know, the first time I slid on a pair of stance, all this talk about socks suddenly made sense.
Yep.
I love them at the gym.
They get a lot
of looks i feel like people are like who's this dude rocking the crew sock and i respect their
stance they got the logo on the inside of the ankle i think that throws people off that's how
i wear them at least i had my my army green ones on today at the gym peep i was getting people
thought you were a troop you still valid no i didn't still valor dave they were just just the
color i'm an inside of the ankle logo guy, too.
Yeah.
Anybody who tells you otherwise, don't listen to these people.
They're posers, man.
Don't listen to these people.
I hate posers.
It's a big argument, though, the inside-outside stance logo thing.
Yeah, well, look, we know what we're talking about.
Stance, they got the best collabs.
You know they got a Wu-Tang collab now?
Mm-hmm.
They got a Grateful Dead one.
They've even got Star Wars, ML mlb nba which we're about
to talk about i have three pairs of the grateful dead socks dave love them very cool you're a big
deadhead i'm not never listened to a single one of their fucking songs don't care love the socks
just loves the socks i've used our own promo code twice to purchase socks i'm just just so you know
that's how much i love these well they, they make a great Christmas gift, Dylan.
Put some socks in the stocking.
That's next level to stuff a stocking with some stance stockings.
Oh, my gosh.
Very few people are doing that.
Yeah, you don't see that.
Yeah, incredible design and comfort, unmatched durability,
casual everyday styles like the no-shows, which you don't have to go crew.
I've got a pair of the no-shows.
They're great.
Hot.
Yeah, they're hot. Thanks, man. Oh, they got James Harden ones, which you don't have to go crew. I've got a pair of the no-shows. They're great. Hot. Yeah, they're hot.
Thanks, man.
Oh, they got James Harden ones too?
Do you have those?
I got a few pairs of those, yeah.
I'll be honest with you.
You get some weird looks when you've got a cartoon James Harden
with a full beard on your shin, but that's okay.
That's fine.
They're fantastic.
Right now, our listeners are going to get a free pair of socks
with their next order.
All you have to do is go to stance.com slash circling back.
Again, that's stance.com slash circling back.
Check it out, man.
I can't think of a better gift.
Step up your shit sock game.
You know it's a bad gift in the past when you're a kid.
Like, oh, mom got me socks.
If you get some stance socks, that's different.
That's a whole different deal. Actually, you know mom got me socks. If you get some Stance socks, that's different. That's a whole different deal.
Actually, you know what?
No cap.
People have been giving me Stance socks for Christmas.
My mother-in-law, for example.
I have like seven pairs of the Star Wars socks now from Stance
because for whatever reason,
she gave me a pair of Star Wars socks one year,
and I was like, these are so awesome.
Oh, I know why.
But then she kept piling them on.
Because she knows you're a dork and you like Star Wars.
She thinks I'm a huge nerd. Well, no no it's because in college people called ross bobo
frat nobody ever that's what you made people call you you would make like the pledges car that was
weird you ever told people about how that one time you and i got into a freestyle battle that no one
else was participating in on the balcony of the frat house in the middle of a party and literally
no one else was even paying attention it was just you and me yeah and then you rhymed my last name with the word colon and it took me like six and a half months to
recover from that yeah i don't know if you said something along the lines of ross boland uh like
smells like something that come out of my colon or something like that and i just remember being
like this is going to take me a while to bounce back from yeah yeah i smell like that too so it
makes it's funny because we thought we were really killing it, and no one was paying attention.
We're off in the corner of our back deck.
No, no.
The one girl who was mildly interested in maybe speaking to one of us
at one point in the night looked over, saw us freestyling at each other,
and was like, I'm going to pass.
Yeah.
I'm at the wrong party.
These aren't my guys.
Look, if you're not trying to catch a freestyle, don't party with us.
No, no.
We got bars.
Hey, let's do Rossoss let's do ross's
nba seg do we have to do we have to go back and talk about it i think we do okay the maps look
really good admittedly um much better than i thought they were the most fun i've had watching
the maps in um probably eight years nine years which weirdly makes it fun more fun for for fans
of the rockets too because it's not the same
when the mavs and rockets aren't good at the same time oh it's more no i hate that um and spurs it
applies they're definitely ahead of schedule um luke is better than i thought and i thought luke
was gonna be like sick i thought he's best player in the draft and like he's exceeded expectations
and like watching i bought league pass just to watch luuka. Is he a top 10 NBA talent already?
I think he is.
Yeah, he's a freak.
I'm not excited about that.
His passing is sick.
His game reminds me a lot of Harden.
He doesn't score quite as well as James,
but I think he passes.
Well, he's like 20 years old.
He's also 20 years old.
He's got some time.
James is 10 years into the league. You know what I mean?
It's absurd. That's a guy
he could gleam shit from too, dude. If he can pick up
some of the pieces of Harden's game on how to draw
fouls, it's going to get ugly.
Yeah, he's already picked up on the
step backs, right in somebody's grill.
I've never seen anybody look more unhappy
than Dylan looks directly to my right at the moment.
Dylan's a Spurs fan and they're very meh.
Regular season NBA, it's just terrible.
You hate it.
People tune into this pod to hear us talk sports.
I live for it.
You hate it.
Yeah, it's pretty lame.
At least Will's not here,
so we don't have to talk fucking Premier League or some shit.
We give him about 30 seconds a week on that.
But you do have a scarf guy in here.
It feels like that's all the soccer representation we need, right?
I think the first time I ever watched a soccer game was last week
because Will gave us a pick for the first time.
Okay.
It wasn't bad.
Did it hit?
It hit.
It was a Man City-Liverpool game.
Okay.
That game was tight.
The boys were buzzing.
I actually watched it.
See, here's what's weird.
The boys weren't buzzing.
They were buzzing, Dylan.
They scored like three goals in the first half.
No, it wasn't the boys.
It was the lads.
He might as well be here right now.
I can hear his fucking voice in my head.
Okay, we're back.
The fact that he didn't give me that pick, though,
I feel like he owes me money now
because I didn't get to hit that pick.
He said he quit gambling until that moment.
He's back in.
Hey, I know gambling problems aren't funny,
but what if Will just developed a horrific
life-altering gambling problem?
I couldn't disagree with you more.
I think gambling is one of the funnier problems you can have.
Yeah, until you lose your home and your family.
Think about it this way.
All the other ways you can lose your whole family and home
and your career and shit, like heroin or alcohol,
those are super depressing.
You're right, you're right, you're right.
Gambling on a fucking game?
A soccer game. That grown men are playing is the funniest reason to. Gambling on a fucking game that grown men
are playing is the funniest reason to ruin your life of all
time. Grown men you'll never meet.
Could care less that you exist. Or even more
pathetic, college kids
strapping young
lads.
There's nothing like losing thousands
of dollars on college football players who
up until more recently
don't have any money of their own.
Did we ever go back?
Like did the SMU coach,
do you ever get up as like a little,
hey, I went for it, like nod?
I don't know.
That was so fun.
Me dipping my foot back into the gambling game. That was a hell of a time.
I don't know if you...
I felt like I won.
I had no money on it.
SMU covered like via...
So they're down two scores.
They went for two inexplicably.
Yeah, I remember this.
19 seconds left.
To be down by six.
Yeah, and that's how I won $500,000.
Yeah, the line was six and a half.
Dude, good for you.
500K.
Dave and I were just like, oh my God, they're going for two.
No way.
Made no sense, I don't think.
They got it.
They got it.
Shouts to Buchel. I love sports betting. It's so fun. This is making, I don't think. They got it. They got it. They covered it. Shouts to Buchel.
I love sports betting.
It's so fun.
This is making me itch a little.
I'm like, what games are on this afternoon?
What can I bet on when I get out of the studio?
I'm so glad I don't have the gambling bug like I used to.
You don't have a gambling problem?
You're happy about that?
I think you're better than us.
Yeah, I do.
You think you're better than me?
I do think I'm better than you guys.
You don't even know me.
You've got to dunk that shit. That's all i got on the nba dave ross when's the last time you did cocaine with a
hog um a feral hog you know man it's funny you ask the first time i remember doing cocaine with
a feral hog was in 2011 was i with with you? And I was in a bar.
It was like 1.30, close to closing time,
and I was approached by a feral hog that was like, look, man, I've got this blowski.
You want to hit the stall?
And we'll just see what happens from there.
Weren't you with the blind pig?
Uh-huh.
Was that a true story?
Yeah, and it created,
it started a downward spiral
for about six years of my life.
This one feral hog showing up with cocaine.
So it's weird that you ask.
I have no idea where you're going with this.
Do they keep high quality stuff?
What kind of coke do they unstrap with?
I would say it's a step above park coke.
It's not just coke you score in the park like Kendall got hooked up with in Succession.
I don't know if you remember that scene.
But it's not the best Coke
It's not the kind that makes you
Immediately shit your pants
You know
Should we go back to the park today
After this podcast?
We could
Y'all park boys now?
That park
Oh
You know Brett lived in NYC
He's kind of like
All things New York
I assume he knows
I don't think
I don't think you should buy Coke
In Central Park
Just don't do that
What is Central Park like, Brett?
Is it like in Home Alone? Is it terrifying?
No. It's pretty nice.
It's a nice park.
Dylan's been there. I have?
Have you? I have.
Like it's too big of a park?
It's pretty reasonably sized, I think.
It's very large. Would you say it's like a
small to mid-sized park?
If you're looking to... You can run in it's like a small to midsize park. If you're looking to go,
you can,
you can run in it and,
uh,
and see a different part of the park every time you run.
Do you want to?
Okay.
Can I ask a question?
Yeah.
I mean,
why not?
Are y'all aware of,
are you familiar with how often I am,
uh,
um,
bombarded by your listeners with your,
with,
with inside jokes from this show?
What kind of stuff to hit you with?
Um,
just anything and everything?
It's gotten to the point where I can't even ask another human being,
what's your deal?
Or like, what's his deal?
Or anything without...
That's a newer one, too.
Is it?
Yeah.
It feels like it's been haunting me for at least six months every single day.
It's probably six months old.
Like, I can't speak to you or mention your name
without somebody being like, what's Dylan's deal?
And I'm like, God fucking... touchers and backers you people are
ridiculous well nobody knows the answer well i feel like i at least partially know the answer
but it's not about answering the question it's about the question that's fair yeah uh my little
for those of y'all who know my little brother sam who's almost definitely listening and and
possibly even masturbating at the moment out of excitement uh is a huge fan of y'all's too.
So I get like, and my mom listens.
So I get circling back jokes.
Shout out Debbie.
Tossed at me all day, every day.
Can't leave Steve out.
Steve's in there too.
The whole crew.
Which is great, which is fun because it's like, as y'all know, when you do this job and when you do podcasts, I'm assuming it would be very weird if either of y'all listened to my show at any point.
I don't get to listen to y'all's show and keep up with it either.
I don't, but to be fair, I don't listen to any podcast.
Right, so neither do I.
I no longer get to listen to any podcast at all.
And that's partially also out of like, we don't want to bite each other's style,
hit on all the same shit.
It's really hard to avoid that whole thing. So I don't even listen to Rogan because I don't want to bite each other's style, hit on all the same shit. It's really hard to avoid that whole thing.
So I don't even listen to Rogan
because I don't want to be influenced
by whatever the hell that dude is doing.
Point being, I get to keep up with y'all's jokes
and inside jokes and shit
in ways that you wouldn't even have imagined are possible.
Like my mom tweeting them to me and shit.
So it's just funny.
And it's been like, not to get sappy for a second,
but it feels really good to be making
content with you two fucks again just for just for even a few minutes man it's it's taken uh
longer than it should well ross i think it took about as long as it was supposed to get you in
here ross this has been really enjoyable man thanks for coming in all right we'll see you
next time dude this was real this was no but to your point people have been asking for it
and i think it was like we all needed to get to a play and i mean not just us in this room like we all needed
to get to a place where like moving past everything that we went through with our old company and all
the drama and shit like it takes a really big toll on you right like i think that was an enormously
stressful situation for all of us and it just just, like, you got to get, I think people have wondered what has taken so long
to get us back in the booth together.
And it's just a timing thing, man.
Like, it just happened to click finally.
Even people speculating, like, are y'all even friends anymore?
Like, yeah, like, we're talking about.
I mean, we don't work together anymore.
That's kind of the extent of us.
And, like, we don't, I don't see Bill every day.
Right.
We don't talk every day.
Right.
But that's also not how adult men in their 30s really operate either.
You don't fucking, I don't need to text you every day, bro.
No, that's not, no, I don't need that.
You and me have a pretty good idea of what each other have going on.
Sure.
Please don't text me every day.
I feel like I probably text you every day.
I do text you every day.
But you're more of a texter.
Yeah, yeah.
I'll text with you.
Dylan's in his 40s, man.
They don't fuck with, you know, text messages and shit.
There's another one.
How old your ass is.
God, it's fucking never ends.
He's an older person.
I'm really not.
I mean, you know.
But it's, y'all are fucking hilarious and I love you both and it's been incredibly enjoyable
to watch your company grow over the past few months as I'm like floundering trying to do
my own thing as well.
You have a fucking employee. Yeah, we hired this little fucker. we hired this little sitting across from you which is nuts with the tall hair
you convinced a ginger to move from new york to work for you strawberry yeah whatever man
where did the so you go by ross your first name is william william yeah he actually goes by wr
no get dude no dave no Dave, that's not funny.
I have read the book.
So why does Dylan call you Bill?
What's the origin of that?
Besides William.
A lot of people call me Bill.
So like, yeah, both my grandpas were Bills.
And I always thought that was like the goal to get to a point where people would call you Bill.
Because then you're a man, right?
You're not a little billy.
Also, Dylan and I, there's a lot of this answer could last so long. the point where people would call you Bill, because then you're a man, right? You're not a little Billy or Bill.
Well also Dylan and I, there's a lot of,
this answer could last so long.
We played Golden Tee for every day together,
Dylan and I, for like years,
and there was a part in the game
where a character in the background would yell out like,
Billy.
It was a mother allegedly trying to find her son.
It was a very, it was a weird,
I can't even explain it.
A weird element of the game
that people don't know
was in there, but yeah.
It really escalated
how often Dylan
was calling me Bill.
Was it a ghost?
Dude, it might have been.
I think it's when you play
the Grand Canyon course.
There's some mother
in the distance
looking for her lost son.
Yes.
It's really weird.
No, like a really dark...
She would go,
Billy.
And it would echo
in the canyon.
It was really weird.
The Grand Canyon's very large. So we started... Did she keep it out of your batch swing, though? I echo in the canyon. It was really weird. The Grand Canyon's very large.
So we started.
Did she keep it out of your batch swing, though?
I don't think so.
She was pretty disrespectful.
She just lets it fly.
She's trying to find Billy, man.
Yeah, the kid's out there.
Vultures are circling.
I mean, the kid's going down.
Billy's out there doing blow with feral hogs.
I forgot this is the feral hog segment.
No, but to answer your question, that's why people call me Bill.
Because my first name is William.
I don't know.
I have a lot of nicknames.
I've got issues.
Problems.
No, you're tied, dude.
You see?
You see?
I don't know if you've been to the Oak, by the way.
There's a golden tea in the corner.
He hasn't.
Ross doesn't drink.
Is the Oak a bar?
The Oak is a bar in my apartment complex.
I haven't been.
To the bar.
Catch the fever. Where's your apartment complex? Which side of town are you in? South complex. I haven't been. To the bar. Catch the fever.
Where's your apartment complex?
Which side of town are you in?
South First.
Oh, so you're South Side boy, too?
290 or 71.
I don't know.
So none of y'all are North.
Fuck no.
Nah, man.
What's with those people?
I stay south of the river, dog.
You know that.
Okay, yeah.
I don't really get them.
South Side, you know what it is.
Ben White and this bitch.
Hell yeah, Dave.
Exactly. Exactly.
Exactly.
Dave runs the streets down there, man.
Did you want to talk about feral hogs, though?
Yeah, I don't have to.
We have this story.
If you run out of other shit to talk about.
It comes from Italy, where you can get some ganosh.
These are Italian feral hogs.
Yeah, which is super tight.
You know they have a hog problem over there, too.
I'm learning that right now.
This comes to us from GQ, originally reported on by Newsweek.
I tried to go to Newsweek, but they have too many pop-ups,
and their shit sucks, so I'm going to do the GQ write-up.
A gang of suspected drug dealers, one Italian and three Albanians,
were arrested on charges of trafficking after police tapped their phones and overheard
them talking about dealing drugs.
More specifically, they were complaining about how
rampaging wild boar had
dug up their massive stash hidden in Italy's
Valdicchian Valley.
Valdicchian.
So out there in Italy, presumably,
there's just probably 30 to
50 hogs that are just
yacked out of their minds, like talking to each other about business ideas and shit.
How many hogs do you think?
We're going to get out of here, man.
We're going to get off this ranch.
You got to think it's 30 to 50.
You got to think it's about 30 to 50 feral hogs.
We're going to fucking make it.
We're going to fucking make it.
We're going to fuck up that vineyard next week, man.
I know we can do it, man.
We can hop that fence, that barbed wire.
Shit.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Dude, what does that even look like?
There's just 30 to 50 highly coconated feral hawks.
Coconated.
They just went to town on that coke, dog.
And they got snouts.
Do you think they put lines out or they just got into it?
It's Scarface style.
You go for the pile.
You go for the pile.
And plus, they're not known for their ability to chop up lines.
I doubt any of them had a debit card they could pull out and start.
They lack the poseable thumbs.
That's true.
The hooves are an issue.
You know, it's funny, though, but there's almost like two toes,
and you could almost stick the card between there,
and then just maybe...
Yeah, I guess they could have done that, Ross.
Bill.
So I hope these things survived survived i remember hearing a story about
a bear a bear that got into some cocaine and like the bear like it got into like copious amounts of
cocaine and it just died 20 minutes later you heard this on rogan didn't you uh probably yeah
yeah oh my god same thing what's up no you there's a quote out there on Twitter. It said the police officer was describing the bear.
It was the most dangerous predator on the planet for 15 minutes.
Oh, 100%.
Excuse me, bear fucker.
Do you need assistance?
A coked out bear is the worst.
No, that's not what you want to...
Y'all spent a lot of time talking about animals you would fight or win against or whatever.
That's not the one you want to step in the octagon with.
The cocaine bear.
Dude, imagine a coked out polar bear.
You don't want that smoke.
The white on white?
You know how big those are, bro?
A polar bear?
This guy's really surprised about it.
They're like 12 feet tall in their highlights.
Oh, they'll rip your fucking face right off, bro.
I saw that picture
that like looks like the human evolution picture the graphic the graphic of of uh sizes of bears
compared to a human i am still astounded by it it's also doing uh doing numbies on the twitter
you know what's funny we have a feral hog problem in texas right oh yeah these people go out with
their helicopters and they have y'all ever done this by the way no we've talked about it you've seen this you've heard about this i understand why
people do it i don't know if i would want to do it like i don't know if i want to be there for
the mass slaughter like it looks tight on a youtube video but i'm not sure i want to be in
the copter helicopters crash they do and i don't want to go down on a feral hog it's like some
vietnam shit man yeah imagine a chopper swirling over your head.
And they're just,
they got a machine gun strapped to them.
Dude, if we do it,
so Ross, you may not know this
because you haven't been listening,
but I recently invested
in a Bluetooth speaker.
You know, Dave,
I know this because I've been
on social media in the past month.
Well, I actually called it an investment.
We're not sure why.
So I definitely,
I pulled the trigger finally
and I got one.
I know I don't like to flex
a lot on this pod,
but it's something that I, I've been wanting for a long finally, and I got one. I know I don't like to flex a lot on this pod, but it's something that I've been wanting for a long time,
and I finally got one.
I will bring it up in the helicopter if we go.
Oh, wow.
What's the expected ROI on that speaker?
I want to know the answer to this one, too.
You know, I actually keep it in a safety deposit box at the bank.
So anytime you want to listen to it, you have to go to the bank?
Yeah.
What about, like, Saturday? What do you do? That's for the boys anyway. bank so anytime you want to listen to it you have to go to the bank yeah what about like saturday
what do you do uh that's for the boys anyway so hey what if you uh what if you fed hogs
tannerite based food people and then go up in the chopper oh fuck you know what's wrong with you
that is a party people set traps with tannerite i like the way your mind people do i think you're
wait wait what do you mean hold on so tannerite's a thing people do. Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean? Hold on.
So Tannerite's a thing you can possess legally in Texas.
Right.
Well, yeah.
My uncle has a ton of it. And it explodes.
Right.
But what do you mean trap them with it?
They will lure in hogs.
And there's videos on YouTube.
And they shoot it from a distance.
And they shoot it and it explodes the entire 30 to 50 carcasses laying around.
That's gnarly.
My faves are when they fill a refrigerator with Tannerite, and then they shoot it.
So the fridge goes up 400 yards in the air, but then the fridge door comes flying off
and kills the guy with the camera.
I think that only happened once in a video.
That was tight, though.
Yeah, it was.
It was tight.
That dude almost got his head taken off.
I mean, he literally almost died.
That's a tough way to go out.
I loved it.
How'd Bobby go out?
No, fridge door.
Fridge door, Tannerite a tough way to go out. I loved it. How'd Bobby go out? In a fridge door. Fridge door.
Tannerite explosion
trying to go by.
But I had no idea
the Italians
the Italians
excuse me
suffered from a similar issue
with these feral hogs.
It's a worldwide epidemic.
So when I went to Italy
you may remember this
I went to Firenze
Florence as you might know it.
Beautiful.
Never been.
We were at
one of the wineries
out there in the Tuscan Valley
very beautiful
and there was like
just like a dude
and he was just
kind of walking
around with a shotgun
I was like
what's this dude doing
like oh we have
a hog problem
and I'm like
dude I don't know
if that little
I don't know if
that shotgun's
gonna do much
like you could
kill a hog
with a shotgun
but you gotta be
fairly close
you can't do
long distance
I'm just like
dude there's
you guys gotta
get some helicopters
get the choppers
Texas is the get the chop helicopters. Get the choppers.
Texas is the... Get the chopper.
Get to the chopper.
Do it now.
Get to a deal.
Texas has the most.
They have roughly 2 million feral hogs in Texas.
Who is your daddy and what does he do?
Now we're just doing Arnold voices.
But didn't know the Italians had this issue.
So what is this?
This is like cockroaches, mosquitoes, feral hogs.
These are the things that we deal with as a world,
that there are too many of these things.
And why is it that they are producing at such a massive fucking rate?
And what the hell do they actually eat?
Dude, they have multiple litters per year.
So that's the problem.
They can have, I think, two or three litter,
probably maybe even four litters per year.
And then they just eat anything?
They eat everything.
And destroy all your land and your bushes.
Go eat ass.
They don't give a fuck.
They will eat whatever you put in front of them.
Like goats, but hogs.
They'll eat a refrigerator door if you put it in front of them.
Cocaine.
Yeah.
Dude, imagine going home and you're like,
I'm going to get some orange juice.
And you walk in your kitchen and your fridge door is gone
because the fucking hogs ate it.
You're like, dude, no.
It's just not even cold.
And then one of them's chopping up lines
on your kitchen table
with his Amex between his hooks.
He's like, what's up, man?
I just need a place to crash
for like two weeks, man.
Somebody's got to make a cartoon
of this feral hog community
of cocaine addicts
that we've created here.
This is the funniest shit ever.
Yeah, yeah, man.
No, it's tight, man.
Just chop it up, man.
Just chop it up, man.
There's more in the bag, man.
Let me lick the bag a little, man. If you go out to like West Texas, man. Just chop it up, man. There's more in the bag, man. Let me lick the bag a little, man.
If you go out to like West Texas, man,
I'm telling you, dude,
they got some really good shit out there.
There's a lot of money out there in oil and gas, dude.
I'm thinking about going out there
and starting like a land company.
My dad, he knows some guys out there.
They got some money invested.
Sorry.
You're a hog at this point?
I'm a coked out hog, correct.
That is what's happening.
You're not following?
I wanted to make sure that I was on the right.
Okay, good.
Hogs do oil and gas, too. Can you you imagine like this doesn't really how podcasting works but
like i always think about this when i do my show like if somebody tuned in midway through what
would happen like if somebody just tuned in what is that so you know what i'm worried about is so
we'll get to this in a minute but dylan and i went to a dinner last night and uh there's a lot
of people asking about the company and what the podcast is so there's potentially a bunch of new listeners
maybe not a bunch like four uh and you know they're all like you know power players they're
all like you know important people in austin and stuff and they're gonna they're gonna tune into
this and first of all the first one they're gonna start with they're gonna be like huh
because like they were asking us like just blame you can blame
me though they're asking what the podcast is about and dylan and i you know that's something you
always struggle about right like god occ you know what it's about it's easy yeah when we do spooky
season that's easy to explain but like this or like your podcast you're right it's like
fucking viral trending social media stuff yeah Yeah. It's a difficult.
Bad impressions.
I like that about.
I mean, that's what I love so much about y'all's sense of humor and mine and the ways they overlap.
Look, man, if you stick to one subject all the time, that shit is boring.
Yeah.
I'm trying to talk about a bunch of shit.
You know?
We cast a wide net.
Ah, yeah.
Ah, yeah.
Or a wide load, as John Duda might say. Do you know why feral hogs are our problem, David?
Because they fuck up your land.
Feral hogs destroy ecosystems by overforaging,
destabilizing soil in wetland areas,
and upsetting creek or stream beds
by way of excessive rooting and wallowing.
Duh.
Dude, there's nothing worse than walking down to your wetlands
and seeing a bunch of hogs wallowing yeah yeah and they also they damage um let's say they put stress on endangered
species too yeah because they just destroy shit i'm wondering if like is this a situation where
these these hogs got all yakked out and you know 20 minutes into well maybe you don't know i don't
want to accuse anybody in this room of ever having done cocaine but you know 20 minutes after you do a line
or whatever
you need more
and you need it quick
or your mood's gonna start to turn
is it that all these hogs
loaded up on coke
and then it was gone
and then they crashed
and got a little disgruntled
and then the destruction
really begins
yeah maybe
maybe
maybe
like they were just like
so now what if like
this is what hogs like
what motivates them they're just always on the search for more cocaine this is what hogs like, what motivates them?
They're just always on the search for more cocaine.
And that's why they just rummage through everything.
I mean, for that squad of 25 to 30 assumed feral hogs, you got to imagine that's what
the rest of their weekend looks like.
Yeah, I would think so.
I believe it was 30 to 50 feral hogs.
Oh, excuse me.
30 to 50 feral hogs.
Yes, thank you.
But they got to hit a re-up now.
Where's the next batch?
Where's my next fix coming from? Where's the next plug? Exactly plug exactly albanians it's hard out there for a feral hog if i have any
albanians hit me up uh you know albanians own a bunch of like uh pizza joints in texas if you
have any albanians they're like listening oh okay they own a bunch of pizza joints there was a place
in duncanville called sam's pizza uh just albanians
in general they look like well like here's the thing they they're they look similar to italians
and they're these guys are from new york and they have heavy new york accents so people assume that
they're like italian dudes you know they kind of have like this you know they got the gold chains
and stuff sure but they're not they're albanians and it's just yeah i guess the cuisine is not that
different word yeah it's weird how pockets of like uh and this is just a observation as an american
pockets of immigrants from particular countries and races will like cling to shit and ride it
ton of asians have nail spas and hair salons and shit like that's traditionally been the way it go
like it's just an
interesting thing that people find these routes and then they sort of make it into a family
practice and shit and build it from there i i love that i love going to a gas station i know
it's like family owned yes and it's the same kit the same people every time i go in yeah i got i
got the same fucking dude talking to me every day at my gas station bro and he's like some 60 year
old indian guy we couldn't have less in common.
And that's one of my social points of the day.
Well, Ross, I'm glad you brought that up because somebody on here,
I'm not going to name names,
Brett, he's always coming in here like,
I need to build this wall and shit.
Yeah, Brett's a big wall guy.
Am I?
Wow, Dave.
That's what you're always saying.
Last episode, you said I'm a drunk driver.
Now, I'm going to build the wall guy.
I'm just, look, I'm gonna build the wall guy i'm just look
i'm trying to keep it interesting don't run don't run brett off man yeah i'll tell you brett i've
become very familiar with the feeling you're experiencing right now which is that when when
someone gets to make jokes about uh about just total false jared borislo the fucking idiot that
i work with on occasion will come in and he'll be like you know what i'm gonna do is just derail
the whole show today and make up a 10 minute story about something that never happened
with you.
Oh, I wouldn't know what that's like.
That never happens to me.
Those are true though.
But with Jared.
Shut up.
Oh, fuck, dude.
Yeah.
You have the same problem.
Why is this happening to us?
Because this fucker right here with the microphone in his hand is the guy who does all of it.
It's Dave and Jared.
Dude, look, some guy called me a Jesse Pinkman looking ass on Instagram.
I'm having a bad day.
The hot Jared Barslow segment that you guys have run on for the last year was one of the
funnier bits I've ever seen in my life.
Because it's scary how hot Jared is.
Hot Jared is real hot, by the way.
They have to have the same blood somewhere.
I think I saw him at Equinox.
Yeah, he's in there right now.
He's definitely an Equinox guy.
He's doing cocaine in the stall with a feral hog before he cranks some fucking...
Like the hog's going to be spotting him.
Yeah.
Come on, dude.
You got it.
No, you got this.
I'm not helping you.
You got this.
One more, dude.
You got this.
The fucking hooves are clanking up against the steel fucking bar.
I'm glad to see that you're including J-Bone more in your show.
No, Jared's like full-blown co-hosting now.
But he has a nine-to-five.
So that's become the main problem with me is the dudes that I do the show with,
they all got regular ass day jobs
and I don't.
It's just a lot of time for like-
So we got that question last night.
Porn.
A lot of porn.
And they were nice about it.
Don't take any offense to this,
but do you guys do this for a living?
Yeah.
Oh, you mean at that event last night
people were asking you that?
Yeah.
Man, that's-
Yeah.
Yeah, I know, man.
We're talking to mics.
Why is it hard to understand though like why don't people because it's new so but people are like it's so fucking stupid though it's like oh man dude but television and radio
and everything else exists and has for 50 years like true it's pretty clear cut you get paid for
the advertisements that's how the business works the more people that listen the
more money you get for the ads it's just i always am dumbfounded by people being like so how do you
make money like what do you think i'm reading the ads for all media makes for fun like i'm hoping
that maybe then the company will later come and pay me like no they're paying us for the ads what
the fuck is wrong with you people figure it out not y'all listening y'all know the other idiots
that's always a fun like thanksgiving question with the family like well what are you doing now What's wrong with you people? Figure it out. Not y'all listening. Y'all know. The other idiots.
That's always a fun Thanksgiving question with the family.
What are you doing now?
How do you make money?
Oh, is this for fun?
You still in that phase of life?
My family stopped caring.
Well, I was at Barstool for three years. Yeah, yeah.
That's a lot.
A lot.
That's a lot.
So you guys are on Instagram, right?
Right.
Yeah.
But we also, well, what about the,
you guys do viral videos?
How do you make money on those?
We do viral vids.
We monetize the viral content,
but you kind of can if you want.
It increases the reach.
How do you go viral?
Yeah.
Dylan's always saying like
when he comes in here,
he's like,
we need to go viral today.
I'm like, dude, calm down.
Yep.
This is another one of those.
It's happening to you right now
as we speak.
You're going to tell me right now
you don't want to go viral?
Is that what you're saying?
Here's what's frustrating.
No, I don't want to go viral right now.
Nothing you can do about it. Nothing you can say right now go viral is that what you're saying here's what's frustrating i don't want to go about nothing you can do about it nothing you
can say right now is going to change what dave just said you're done like it's a piece of you
now and that's hard dylan i'm sorry it doesn't make any sense but i just i just bully dylan on
this podcast i like it one of these days he's gonna he's just gonna take me outside and just
slap me silly one of these days you're gonna catch his hands dave you gotta like i'll see you
cabo one of your white chin hairs has got Dave labeled on it.
It just says Dave.
By the way, I'm getting some of those.
And I can't tell if it's from toothpaste.
You're growing a beard.
No.
It's from toothpaste.
Wait, I'm sorry?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So I aggressively brush my teeth in a fashion that creates foam all around my mouth.
By the end of it, I look like a dog.
Oh, are you one of those people?
Uh-huh.
Don't do that.
That has rabies. No, I mean like the foamy toothpaste on the outside of the mouth. it, I look like a dog. Oh, are you one of those people? Uh-huh. Don't do that. That has rabies.
No, I mean, like the foamy toothpaste on the outside of the mouth. Oh, everywhere.
Oh, dude, that's like, that'll break you out.
I mean, it doesn't look like it's doing it to you, but
I used to always hear that growing up. I think you're supposed to put toothpaste
on breakouts.
Because it dries it out?
Like if you have a bad one? I've heard that.
If you have like one zit, put toothpaste on it.
I thought that was like, if you find roadkill on the highway, you pour Coca-Cola on it and it'll burn through it or whatever. What? one I've heard that If you have like one zit I thought that was like If you find roadkill on the highway
You pour Coca-Cola on it
And it'll burn through it
Or whatever
What?
I haven't heard that one either
Nah what?
You know that's a legit thing
I think you're talking about battery corrosion
I'm not fucking with you
Coca-Cola used to be used to
Clean roadkill
Why would you do that?
Why would you do what?
Like is that like
Your job as a civilian
Like a good Samaritan
To like pull over and be like
Well let me get the Coke out
Coca-Cola that is
Two liter?
Wait yeah what are you talking about? Yeah you shake it up The two liter and then you bust it all over the fucking carcass and it why if I ever coca-cola is a strong enough substance to where
it literally cleans like the blood and guts and shit off of the highway allegedly this could be
completely made up man I don't know where you're talking like a cleanup effort here yeah like like
a fucking what's the name of the people who drive around looking for roadkill?
Cleanup crew.
Cleanup crew.
Highway patrol.
Highway roadkill guy.
He cruises around back in the day
and they used to use
like on occasion.
Just with a drum
full of Coca-Cola?
It'd be like you ran out
of the chemicals
that he had or whatever
so you'd have to use
something else
for this last like,
you know, raccoon carcass
and you'd use
some Coca-Cola allegedly.
Why didn't he just like
put it in a bag?
I don't know.
This is going to end
with me getting sued by Coca-Cola.
No.
I feel like it does.
Allegedly used to clean roadkill.
Dude, if they have that government contract, though,
that's pretty lucrative for them.
Dude, you got to get a government podcast contract.
That's where it's at.
Just talk about the government and shit.
Yeah.
Deep state.
I think Giuliani, he's going for that.
I'm in on the Giuliani pod.
What's Giuliani up to?
Oh, I don't know.
Slipping slowly into insanity?
Yeah.
Meddling in impeachment efforts and whatnot?
Oh, tight.
That's fun.
That's fun.
Our government is just the best.
I don't know if you heard.
He's starting a podcast based on the impeachment.
You're not fucking with me?
I'm not fucking with you.
Giuliani is diving into the podcasting game.
Yes.
That's what we all needed.
Rudy Giuliani, half disheveled and mind melted away, talking into a microphone.
Dude, what if that's what ends the whole podcast thing?
We have to all break our jobs.
Yeah.
Like he busts the bubble.
You worry about that though, right?
It's going to be one really bad podcast that just breaks this whole
system this is the episode episode will's not even here dude we've real hard cocaine episode
we had to do it to him you know ha oh is that one of y'all's jokes uh i hear that one it's the
internet's own okay no i i associate that with y'all for sure um yeah so dylan and i went to
an equinox dinner last night i don't i don't
even know what that could possibly entail we're influencers basically what we're trying to we're
awesome we're among austin's elite dylan texted me he's like where are you he's like where are you
i'm like dude i'm i'm in the slow ice uber i'll be there in a minute oh yeah because enzo showed
up at my house i'll have to talk about that and uh get there, and it's in like a tiny private room.
Lenore is the restaurant, and it's like a little house.
And like a living room.
Anyway, I walk in.
It's crowded.
It's one of those things where I'm like, okay, I don't really know that many people here.
I know two people.
It was me and 15 women.
It was Dylan and all women in their 20s and 30s.
The only other male there was a server.
I was like, oh, okay there was a server i was like
oh okay this is an interesting crowd so when you walked in you were just like i happen to be the
first dude who got here or were you like oh shit this is women only i knew it was gonna be mainly
women because it was a small group of of invitees it was probably 25 30 people in total exclusive
somebody called an intimate dinner i got there and i'm like, oh, it's me and Dave and just like 25 women.
It was interesting.
A couple other guys did end up showing up, however.
We had this badass four-course meal.
They had wine pairings with each course.
It was tight.
It sounds incredible.
It was awesome.
Okay.
You just sound like sad about it.
No, no.
It was just an interesting scene.
That's all.
Some people have 25 lighters on
their dresser dylan had 25 women at his dinner wow i'm honestly just i'm getting a little horned
up just thinking about it just that's a lot of paid it's a lot of babes that's a good ratio
you had there yeah but i pretty much just talked to dave and our friend alex the whole time
that makes sense too yeah because i'm scared of the opposite sex so i'm scared of strangers yeah
um no i can't confirm uh me and dylan just kind of and alex talked well are y'all gonna do the
equinox thing like so i went and gave us a free month i got a month because y'all are lifetime
boys right oh yeah yeah so we're gonna go move weight okay i went that's where i was before here
and i'm not talking feral hog cocaine.
I'm talking actual weight, like iron.
Well, the other thing is we were talking the good cocaine that feral hogs can't afford.
That's what's in the bathrooms at Equinox.
Yeah.
The good stuff.
I got to say, I don't think Equinox has cocaine in their bathrooms.
Oh, okay.
It's not provided by them.
I mean, it'd be cool if they did.
They do have like all their products are Kiehl's. You. It's not provided by the gym. I mean, it'd be cool if they did. Oh. They do have like,
all their products are Kiehl's.
You know what?
I've heard that before.
Which, Kiehl's is the shit.
At one point,
somebody called into my show
asking if it was a mistake to,
if it was trash
that every time they go to the gym,
they're stealing all the Kiehl's.
And I was like,
I thought about it.
I was like,
I can't even remember the answer I gave.
But in hindsight,
it is and it isn't. Because you're, I get it. I was like, I can't even remember the answer I gave. But in hindsight, it is and it isn't.
Because I get it.
It's provided.
But how fucking cheap do you have to be to rip shampoo and conditioner from a gym?
Like the bathroom has, there's the amino acid shampoo.
There's like the body wash.
There's a face wash.
And then there's the body lotion.
Then there's the face lotion. Like they's the face lotion like they've got everything so
they are not playing around no they are not if you're in that's got to be a real problem people
stealing it but it's a different deal than a hotel is it easily stealable though is it a little
separate containers i don't know i wasn't really thinking about stealing but no i bet you could
you could steal it maybe he's siphoning it, this person who called in.
He made it sound like, or she, I can't remember,
made it sound like they were pouring it from one bottle to another.
But it just...
It's such a trash move.
But when I go to a hotel, for instance...
Imagine getting caught doing that.
Oh, man.
That's so embarrassing.
I'm trying to decide if it'd be worse to be caught peeing down the drain
of the public shower or get caught stealing shampoo because you're...
The stealing. Just that broke. But I take the shampoo and conditioners and the extra soaps the drain of the the public shower or get caught stealing shampoo because you're the stealing just
that broke but i take the shampoo and conditioners and the extra soaps and shit from a hotel
if i'm if i'm feeling like fuck this hotel that's different okay these are big boy bottles
ah not sample size no these are not sample size it's not like you each get an individual one
it's just like the bigger bottle so if if you're stealing it, you're stealing like... That's straight fucked up.
Yeah.
But yeah, man.
Shout out to Equinox.
Shout out to Alex.
We had a good time last night
and I got a pump in today.
Still learning the new gym.
What'd you hit?
Man, this is so douchey
but I hit chest and arms.
Chest and pies.
Oh, because he's got
a beach trip coming up.
Oh, yeah.
He wants to look good
by the pool, dog.
Yeah, he does.
That's fine. I don't hate the move. You think that's how it works trip coming up. Oh, yeah. He wants to look good by the pool, dog. Yeah, he does. That's fine.
I don't hate the move.
You think that's how it works?
Maybe.
I don't know.
Equinox, if it's the same one that I've been to for the last couple of years,
chest, buys, and tries, you're pretty set up with the equipment they have there.
For sure.
I didn't want to go in there and do legs in a new place,
because legs, you've got to get a rack. and i don't know the lay of the land yet chest
pretty easy yeah so uh it's pretty dope though i'm excited to check out a bunch of classes i'm
gonna try to get into classes i hit lifetime today you did yeah i'm gonna start my trial
when i get back also you know uh they got a steam room too. Eucalyptus and all that.
I've heard about it.
I've not gotten in it yet.
What'd you Oklahoma against today?
In equal hard knocks.
I don't know if you know.
Okay.
Yeah.
This feral hog.
His name is Braden.
Okay.
Wow.
Freddy.
Yeah, dude.
And it turns out feral hogs
have like strong ass heads
because he fucked my shit up. Yeah. Damn. Okay. turns out feral hogs have strong-ass heads. Low center of gravity.
He fucked my shit up.
Yeah.
Damn.
Okay.
I didn't realize you were doing Oklahoma drills with people, much less feral hogs.
Yeah, it's one of the amenities.
They have a room.
Where you just Oklahoma drill.
It's just a bunch of seventh and eighth grade coaches wearing short shorts and greys.
Whistles.
And just yelling at you.
Dave has a pretty unusual and aggressive fitness routine.
Yeah.
He's training for actual football but you never know when you might have to go out there and like like block
somebody for zeke or something yeah you do know usually hey dylan probably won't have you were
an athlete when you were younger oh yeah oh yeah let me ask you something when you played football
because i'm pretty sure i know the answer for dave and i when you played football were you
were you big enough in in middle school and in high school to where you could actually compete?
Did you hit puberty early enough?
I know you were quarterback and shit or whatever.
I hit puberty pretty normally.
I wasn't early.
Do you remember the day you woke up and you were like, shit, my dick's changing?
Yeah, yeah.
I wasn't early or late.
My best friend growing up was a super early guy.
Okay.
He had a home run record in the Little League.
Yeah.
He was starting quarterback in safety.
Freshman year, he was on varsity automatically.
He was straight to varsity.
Done growing.
It just stopped fucking growing.
Yeah.
The dude's like 5'8 now.
Nice guy.
Shouts to Anthony.
But he lived the dream for like eight years probably.
Oh, he was the man.
And then everyone just caught up to him and blew past him.
But so you had the puberty, enough of it in you to compete with like the kids who were hairy and shit.
Yeah.
Because I ask this because I did not.
I didn't hit it until probably sophomore year of high school.
So like in middle school, the only time I played football, Dave, and when I'd get to do Oklahoma drill or whatever,
it was mostly I never got to feel what it was like to be really good at football or
to be able to compete in football because I was too small.
I just got smeared the whole time.
Like I remember the only time I ever got through the line with an opportunity to have a sack,
the quarterback literally just like laughed at me as I was running towards him and like
stiff-armed me into the ground.
Did they put you on the line because you were tall?
No, they put me a linebacker for one play because they felt bad for me.
And I got through unblocked because nobody could fucking see me.
And then I got smeared.
We were talking about this, I think it was yesterday, like in baseball,
when you finally face someone who is like a pitcher who's like really fucking good.
Way, way better than.
And you've never experienced anything like it before.
And it's extremely humbling.
Yes.
Of course, you get that in football too.
It's terrifying.
Yeah.
The first time you're like, well, I'm not nearly as good as i thought i was when you're and you're hitting you know 81
mile power fastballs and then someone pumps 194 up there and it's like oh so this is what it's
actually like to play this sport at a high level yeah and you just can't fucking do it you can go
to the batting cages and crank that thing up to 90 and think that that's like giving you some type
of semblance of what it's like but the first time somebody touches 90 against you on a field it is i mean that's like one of the most humbling moments
of my life i think is the first time i realized like wow i'm never gonna hit a baseball again
or when you're playing basketball growing up and then you finally get to the level where people
start dunking yeah dude what the fuck oh i went shocking i went from an all white middle school
to west side high school hisd on the west side of Houston,
and went from like, let's play pickup basketball
to like, if you come in the gym,
we will literally murder you.
Like people slap in the back.
I wouldn't want to throw you down on you.
I wasn't even allowed in that building, dude.
Like, yeah, I know what you mean.
Like, I do not belong in this sport anymore.
It's a sad moment, though, because that's,
dude, that's it.
Like, it doesn't return at some point.
No.
You know what I mean? Like, you can go do softball in your 30s or whatever, sad moment though because that's dude that's it like it doesn't return at some point no you know
what i mean like you can go do softball in your 30s or whatever but it's not the same as when
you're a little kid and you're in you're legitimately like competing with other people your age yeah
dave did you do steroids as a young boy no okay i was no i weighed like 135 pounds in high school. Okay. I was a tiny boy. Still am.
I don't weigh 135, but I had a butt cut.
Yeah, I've seen that.
That was something.
A lot of skateboarding and angst inside you at that point.
Yeah.
Teen angst, you know, listening to a lot of LB, Limp Bizkit.
Yeah, that's all for the nookie.
I want to talk about some all-day, everyday pants.
Dylan, I want you to listen closely.
This must be about public rec.
Do you know about public rec?
Public rec.
Do I?
Okay, good.
Thank God.
Well, if you don't know, here you go.
No more coming home and changing into sweats.
Now you can have pants that feel as good at work as they do on the couch.
Dylan's wearing his all the time.
I love wearing mine.
I can't take them off.
No.
They don't look like sweatpants. Dylan's wearing his all the time I love wearing mine I can't take them off No They're just They look
They don't look like
Well they're as comfortable
As sweatpants
But they
They look like
Everyday pants
That you can wear out
To the
To work
They've got the waist
And the inseams
Sizing
And they've got
I think they're the first sweats
To have that
Which is important
So if you're like
Short, tall
Or somewhere in between
They fit perfectly
My most recent gram
At DeShivery by the, I'm wearing them.
I'm in my sister's front yard with the home.
We're playing a little golf.
Those are public rec pants.
Wow.
Look how good they look.
Add him on the gram.
Add me on the gram.
They've got nine different colors to choose from,
one for every day of the week and then some
because there's only seven days in the week, but they have nine there's two left over there pretty interesting i wear them all the time you
might catch me at the gym you might catch me like at an important meeting you know i go to a lot of
those i almost wore them last night but i didn't just because of the weather is a little cold i
wanted to wear something a little bit thicker but yeah they're great check it out and right now
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Two things. Speaking of grams,
you posted a gram last night for about
45 seconds and then deleted it.
What happened there? Y'all scared me, man.
It was doing fine when I
refreshed. Oh, I gotta hear this.
It was up for less than a minute. What do you mean it was doing fine?
What was it?
We were in a dark bar last night we went after the equinox dinner we we met our 25 year old yeah
co-worker out i saw y'all putting up some reason very weird your instagram stories were like
candid photos of each other and i was like what the fuck are these yeah we were fucking we were
here's the grammy took down okay let me see it's a great photo it's a great photo I posted it and y'all acted like
I posted a nude on Twitter
Or something of myself
And I just felt so like wait why are y'all giving me shit
So I panicked and I took it down
That's a classy photo
It's a great photo
You're a ridiculous human being
You're like 8 years into this game
And you're still letting Dave shame you
Into taking down Instagram posts it wasn't just me i didn't i just said 11 p.m is
a weird time to put up a gram that's what he said and i no i told him to leave it up
dude i put my shit up at like 1 30 now i don't even i don't care anymore i just don't care i
might repost it at some point that's a good looking photo you do it here's the thing you
need to get those likes since Dylan. Since today is Thursday,
you post it now,
you're going to get
all the likes
up until this pod drops
and then people who missed it,
they're going to go back
and give it that double tap.
Wow.
Thanks, Dave.
Rebirth.
Yeah.
You might get,
yeah, second life.
You know what?
You got to put it up.
Yeah, you got to put it up now.
Stay tuned, everybody.
I think we found our answer.
Ross, were you following me
on Twitter when
I found that dog
a few weeks
ago of course enzo uh-huh the uh older golden retriever uh-huh so he showed back up in my place
last night yeah what do you mean like he just like came through again like wanted to hang i got a
knock on my door and i got really excited because i thought it was uh my butcher box right coming
spot sure shout out uh-huh um and it't, it was my neighbor and his dog.
And I looked and I see this other dog behind him
and he's like looking at me.
I'm like, oh, what's up, dudes?
Enzo.
Enzo.
And I knew immediately like Enzo got out again.
The neighbor's like, hey,
this dog was hanging outside your house.
Do you have ever, he's like,
I think I know who the owner is,
but like, I don't know where they live.
And I was like, dude,
I hung out with this dog like all sunday like a month ago um so that's my boy enzo meanwhile my uber's on the way to go to this dinner and i'm thinking damn
okay what can we do it's raining outside and enzo's randy's like trying to sneak by randy's
whining crying he sees enzo oh yeah go out the front door. I'm like, hang on.
So I go out there.
Enzo's trying to get inside.
And I'm like, dude, I'm leaving.
I can't.
I don't have, and I don't have the owner's contact information because your iPhone only
goes back so far on calls.
And hers, mine went back to the 21st and she, this happened on the 20th of October.
Oh, damn.
So he did like the next door post and they came and got it but like i got a question uh i don't know these owners but it is the second
time this dog's gotten out and come over to my place right the tag on it doesn't it's all faded
there's not a number on it and they don't have it chipped with the correct number phone number
so is it a bad look is it like passive aggressive or is it
just aggressive if like on the next door post where they responded to i'm like hey you might
want to update your dog's collar tags and microchip um because like someone is not going to be able to
there's a chance he gets found by somebody who doesn't know who you are never seen you before
man i would say like message the person if you can instead of calling them out publicly but here's the thing when you do it as a
comment then it allows other people who also need to take that step to fucking snap out of it as
well and on next door it'll escalate oh yeah that's the thing people will pile on that shit is
dramatic oh it's gonna be like uh just a dunk fest there's nothing wrong with that day yeah i think
you're good there i think you're good you got to tell that person to get their shit together i will say this for that
person in their defense we've hit the point in the year where it's windy as a motherfucker every day
and people's gates are blowing open because i've noticed in my neighborhood dude it's like twice
or three times a week now i see a dog has gotten out and it's usually on account of the gate blowing
open science damn you're right about that yeah um so cut him some slack dave
okay well she told okay when i the first time she's like yeah she's like he was out for she's
like we didn't realize he was out it was like three hours later she told me like the kids let
him out why would you admit that i don't know and i'm like okay but look if he wants to keep
showing up in my place he's always got a spot in my backyard. He loves the backyard. Yeah, I think you get maybe six, seven trips in, six, seven visits in.
Enzo's yours.
You don't have to give him that.
Yeah, I was like, at what point is Enzo our dog?
Yeah.
Right?
Six or seven visits.
Okay.
Weren't you smoking ribs the first time he came over, too?
Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.
Oh, that's going to be a magical moment, Dave, the next time you smoke ribs and Enzo can smell it from a block and a half away
and he jumps the fence and comes over.
He wants those ribs, Dave.
Yeah.
I got to tell you, Enzo ain't jumping no fences.
He's a big boy?
He's a thick boy and he's older.
Oh, wow.
Great dude.
He's had a few ribs in his day.
Yeah, he's had a few ribs.
Past his fence jumping days, though.
Yeah.
Gene loved old Enzo.
Happens to the best of us.
God, I miss Gene.
Gene loved ribs, too.
Gary damn sure did. I love Gene all love gene man well shout out to enzo if you're listening
he told me he was gonna give us a listen he was asking me like he's like dude how do you guys
make money on this deal where do i listen like is it on the radio so are you on a serious is it
xm okay so if i'm like in my car I can learn the tuner. What is it?
What station?
Yeah.
Dylan, you got anything else for W.R. Boland?
I was just going to ask you, in case there are some people out there
who are unfamiliar with the Ross Boland podcast
or what you're doing at Boland Media, tell us about it, dog.
The Ross Boland podcast is, like I was explaining earlier,
similar to what
y'all do i don't really stick to any one one subject but uh one thing that i do try to do
a lot is tie in my personal experiences with like mental health substance abuse addiction
and just life shit um because i enjoy that stuff so it's like wow there will be a lot of really
silly stoner comedy and i'm talking about a lot of dumb shit like serial killers you haven't heard of and pirates and whatnot there's
also a lot of serious conversations where i'm pretty open about some of the struggles that i've
had in an effort to to help other people um go through similar shit so like rbp is weird in that
way where it'll kind of juggle between very very silly and very very serious very quickly
it's a fucking weird show just like y'all's it's tough to explain but it's a lot of fun and i'm i'm uh thoroughly enjoying
doing it as a full-time career just i mean we all we all went through a lot to to come out the other
side of our prior professional experience and it feels really good for us all to be able to do this
pretty fun isn't it and make a living and especially
when people thought that it couldn't be done oh yeah and uh i'm loving it man and i'm i appreciate
any support i get from uh we have a lot of crossover between the two of us a lot of people
support our show and y'all shows and as a result of the the start that we got at our prior company
as well so i mean i'm not only appreciative of y'all having me on,
but all y'all's listeners
who have supported my show as well and vice versa.
I talk about you guys quite a bit.
So hopefully we send a lot of RVP folks your way as well.
And then y'all will have to come do RVP at some point soon.
But it's fun as shit, man.
I appreciate anybody who's interested
in what I just described.
If you want to give it a listen, come through.
And then OCC, as Dave described earlier, is just tv and film also a lot of fun but um anytime y'all want to
talk anytime you want me to come do the show i will come through any anytime seriously hit me up
and hopefully not always when will is gone because i would like to make fun of will to his face a
little bit we all enjoy doing that a little bit yeah well we're gonna have a new studio here
pretty soon.
I know you heard we got some space.
Can you tell, when is this happening, y'all's office?
First day of December 1.
Give us some time to actually move in and get it set up, though.
Because you saw, I tweeted at you.
I was like, I'm going to need like a closet or something.
Oh, yeah, that's fine.
It's only like half of a joke.
We got you.
We've got a closet with your name on it.
I took it as a 0% joke.
Yeah, because I'm in my house, man, and I'm losing my fucking mind in there.
Like, I'm losing my mind. We're a 0% joke. Yeah, because I'm in my house, man, and I'm losing my fucking mind in there. Like, I'm losing my mind.
We're a collaborative workspace environment.
Y'all are going to be the next WeWork, I heard.
Yeah, dude, that's the goal.
I do pretty well.
You can use our stew and everything, man.
We'll figure it out.
We'll work it out.
The stock prices are going great for WeWork.
Everything's been phenomenal for them.
I can feel the same for y'all.
We're going to start something called WeTwerk,
and you bring your laptop in, and it's just like a twerk fest and then the twerk team's in there
and there's a room in the back with a just a group of feral 30 to 50 feral hogs doing
they're just yacked out like like planning world domination business ideas yeah as long as we have
a tannerite plug um ross i have one question for you what's up what are your thoughts on the
infamous uh beer olympics video so this is this is one of the longstanding, like, maybe.
You know I haven't watched it, right?
Never?
I've never seen the video.
Dude, you have to watch it.
No, no, no.
That's my place in the story, Dylan,
is that I will, for the rest of my life,
be the guy who never saw Beer Olympics
because I didn't have to see that video to know
exactly how bad it was but it's you no no you don't understand sir i can't you need to appreciate
its place in history there are only a few things keeping me from like snapping and i think if i
watched that so far in the past and it's with our former company i can't do it you don't have any
connect you're not in the video where are you you you? You're not. No, I bailed.
Dude, I saw how things
were progressing that day.
You're reason for not watching,
I'm sorry,
they're just not good enough for me.
You don't have that like
intense twinge of like
angst and anxiety and shame
around that.
That's how I feel.
That period.
It fuels me.
Okay.
When I saw it for the first time,
I felt what you described.
Yeah, so that feeling. I don't want to pile on too much on the video.
It's one of the worst videos ever made.
It's just a total and utter failure to be funny or entertaining in any way.
Is that shitting on it enough for you?
I mean, I think you took care of it.
Look, there was a point where we made some stuff that was either misguided or just didn't hit,
and that's the way the content game goes.
It's Wes and Dill on our podcast one time.
Yeah, I'm not trying to dump on it it then widely considered to be one of the worst interviews
to ever take place i i find me a worse interview how dare you so like i'm just saying that is not
a knock on anybody who may have been in charge of or involved in the creation of the video shit
happens uh it was more of a knock on the general fucking management structure of that company of
which at that point i was a part of.
And my decision, Dave, was not to attempt to help with the direction.
It was to run.
To be clear, I think most of the parties involved, like, they all think it's pretty funny.
Like, funny as in, like, looking back on it.
So bad that it's funny.
Yes.
Because it was, like, even as a concept, it was like, wait a minute.
And then when they started attempting to execute it and I was 40 feet away in my office and I remember looking out the door and being like, I got to go home and I got to go home now.
Major shout outs to DVD.
Dude, he battled through.
I haven't seen DVD in a while.
I am so thankful that I declined the offer to appear in the video.
They straight up wanted me to do it.
Dude, I used to be fearful of doing videos with i did a few for tfm but like i just didn't want to get the wrath of
the tfm commenter well none of us could act for shit no we couldn't you know what we're doing
like i think about like the people like an exec board like jake jake and rob they they weren't
bad actors like they they were passable but like me when i didn't do exec board
but when i would hop on and like do like a cameo and i was just absolute shit it was like i was
doing a bad norm mcdonald impersonation right and it was like the same character and everything
was terrible dude i won't go back and watch like i can't i can't it's too it's too weird man that
that whole that whole deal is just it's a it's like a different
life for me at this point like i don't even it just seems so bizarre to reflect on some of the
shit that we did like it's just that being of course one of the more infamous and horrific
projects that that came as a result what beer olympics my god but no i'm not kidding man like
you're you you you don't remember this
but it's not the first time you've hassled me like ross you have to watch it dude i'm never
going to it's my solemn promise to you i will never watch the video ever i've left the room
multiple times when y'all started watching it and i will never watch the video
bro you got any breaking news i'm looking for some trending topics Dave as a matter of fact I do I'm glad you asked
Ross
This is a little choose your adventure here
I'm going to leave it to Ross because he's a guest on the podcast
Do you want to go Ross cell phones
Airlines
Or rediscovered animals
Holy shit the options here
Are impossible
What how am I supposed to pick from one of those
Those are all good
Why we give you the option Okay I supposed to pick from one of those? Those are all good.
Why we give you the option.
You pick the last one.
Okay, I'll do the last one for Dylan.
Rediscovered animals.
Rediscovered animals in Vietnam, Dave and Dylan and Ross.
The fanged mouse deer has been rediscovered after supposedly 30 years of discussion. Get the hell out of town.
Half mouse, half deer?
With fangs.
What? Oh, you said of town. Half mouse, half deer? With fangs. What?
Oh, you said fanged.
A mouse deer.
I thought you said famed,
which would also make sense
because it's a mouse deer,
but it's a fanged.
It is a mouse deer with fangs.
Mouse deer with fangs.
Is there a picture?
There is.
This is real news,
not an Onion article?
No, this is legit.
Because it sounds like
the jackalope deal.
I'm going to Google this creature.
It sounds like the chupacabra.
The fanged mouse deer.
Wow.
Because you know how-
It's a rodent.
It's not a deer.
Well-
Oh, that's a-
I mean, up to you.
Really, I think it can be-
Yo, that looks like it was created in a science lab.
That is-
It's a cute little guy.
Yeah, but it looks like a deer fucked a rabbit.
It has fangs, Dave.
It has fangs?
It looks straight up like a half mouse, half deer. Yeah, that's a problem.
That's exactly what it looks like.
Hints the name.
People on Twitter are saying
kill it with fire.
I never want to see this in my life.
Don't kill it with fire.
Shoot it. Give it a quick death. It's a small deer
with the head of a rat, basically.
Is what this thing is. Yeah, the legs
aren't proportional, though.
It's weird.
It almost looks like a baby kangaroo.
So was it like a deer with a tiny dick
that fucked a rat,
or was it a rat that was hung like a horse
that fucked a deer?
That's what we're all wondering.
It was a coked-out kangaroo with a tiny dick,
and it fucked a wallaby.
That's a little kangaroo-y and wallaby-y
looking thing.
You know the scientific name?
The chevrotain. C-H-E-V-R-O-T wallaby-y looking thing. You know the scientific name? The Chevrotain.
Oh, that is.
C-H-E-V-R-O-T-A-I-N.
That sounded in 1960s
like Chevy
or like Cadillac.
Maybe the coolest
Latin scientific name
I've ever heard.
Most of the time,
they suck.
That's tight, Chevrotain.
Where is this thing, man?
Brett?
Vietnam.
Huh.
So you gotta think that
are you is there foul play here? Is there like why is this thing making Huh. So you got to think that... Are you...
Is there foul play here?
Is there like...
Why is this guy making...
That's foul play.
I would think it's foul play.
Yeah.
That does not naturally come into existence.
I get what you did there.
What do you think?
What did I do?
Foul play.
Oh, wow.
Do you think that was intentional
or just coincidental?
Brett, you'll have to tell us.
It was coincidental.
But I don't know. I still don't know where you're that was intentional or just coincidental? Brett, you'll have to tell us. It was coincidental. But I don't know.
I still don't know where you're going with it.
Fowl?
Like waterfowl?
Oh, wait.
This thing doesn't have any bird in it, does it?
No.
Oh.
I hear it out, David.
I was there.
I've guessed out of this thing.
Okay.
Let's go next topic.
You know, it's kingdom animalia.
Can we do the airlines one?
Airlines, yeah.
Dude, hold on.
Kingdom animalia.
I've always said that's the best kingdom.
I agree.
Animalia.
A groundbreaking nonstop flight from London to Sydney, Australia has just taken off, Dave.
That's too long to be on a plane.
That is 20 hours on a plane.
I don't have enough Xanax for that.
I do.
I did 12 before.
But that was the follow-up question.
Just go the Dion Waiters way.
Just eat hella eddies.
Likely have to be grounded in Dubai or something.
Have a panic attack over the ocean.
I'm still trying to figure out how Waiters ate enough edibles to seizure.
That's an intense, like, on an airplane, bro.
You should probably take some time off.
Yeah, you just chill out.
Take the half next time.
Is it a hypersonic plane?
Like, does it go fast?
It's not.
It's just a 787.
So it's still 20 hours that you're up there.
Does it have to refuel?
Like, how does that work?
It's got the range.
Midair.
My question being.
Jet pulls up alongside it.
Sick.
Like Air Force One.
What is the longest flight you've ever been on?
And how did you cope with it?
Roamed to Dallas, 12 hours.
Window or aisle?
Aisle.
That's doable.
Like business class?
I watched five movies.
Aisle is everything.
Five?
Did you take breaks?
I just powered through.
I watched five movies.
No nap, no sleep, just cranking out movies.
I took quick little intermittent naps here and there.
But never for an extended period.
See, I'm like that.
I can't sleep on a plane for more than a couple minutes, man.
The first shake, I'm up.
I'm awake.
The woman sitting next to me is my hero.
She didn't get up one time.
That's not healthy.
No way.
You think she had an adult diaper on?
I don't know.
She was just pissing.
I was pooping her pants.
I was like like thank you i
made my blood depends you're supposed to get up every like four like blood clots or that
she might have blood clots now catch me doing lunges down the walkway you know what always
makes me think of is liar liar when he's like your honor may i ask for a short restroom break
and then he goes into the the explanation that if hold in your urine, it can result in difficulties to become aroused.
Every time I've had to pee for 20 fucking years now,
I've thought about that scene.
Really?
Every time?
Never heard that.
Been like, if I don't go soon,
I could have boner problems.
So like on road trips, you're like,
fuck, I get it.
Night states, I get that.
I just did it,
done.
Buses,
date parties in college,
back of the bus,
all I could think about was like,
well,
this is going to be a problem later.
This is going to be a problem.
Yeah,
that's pretty much how I live my life. I thought you were going with like kidney malfunctions,
but you went right to the heart malfunction.
No,
I don't care about that.
I don't care about that at all.
I've held it so long that my kidneys hurt.
I'm a mental midget.
Really?
Yeah.
Well, you're a small bladder guy, though.
Yeah.
I was going to say.
Yeah, it's not great.
Long flights.
I'm a relatively small bladder guy, too.
Long flights are like, I get anxiety about that.
It sucks because I would love to drink on a plane.
Right.
You have to be careful about it because it's annoying.
I will not drink because I don't want it to pee.
Right.
No, that sucks.
I might drink a little ginger ale, but i'm certainly not having a beer
i usually i don't do beer in the airport because i dread the fact of you know like between the
gate and takeoff you're not allowed to get up or else they they have to like stop the plane
sure that 30 to 35 minutes where you can't get up i would have to piss it's a much longer window
than they give you credit for that point there where you're really not like you're not supposed to go use the restroom oh yeah and i've i've gotten up before because they
it was like i had to pee already i was like all right i'll just hold it wait then they went to
de-ice the plane oh my god that's another 25 minutes that you're just like fuck so i got up
right like as they were pulling in for takeoff and i was that guy what does that even entail
de-icing a plane? They spray it down
with some sort of,
excuse me,
what probably is toxic substance.
Okay.
And it lowers the freezing point
to the point where it can't freeze.
It's not like 60, you know,
chicks running around
with hair dryers
pointing them at the wheels
or whatever.
It's a little different than that, yeah.
Okay.
That's good.
There's a niche for that, I uh in cell phone news dave motorola is bringing back
the razor they've already switched from motorola to a primeco phone so that's true i don't know
what primeco is but flip so 25 years old it's not even funny also was primeco just here was that
only in texas or was that international or national like do people in new york know what
primeco is if they're not 25 you got that the gas station right was that international or national? Like do people in New York know what Primeco is if they're not 25?
You got that at the gas station, right?
Was that the burner you could get?
Yeah.
I mean, you'd buy minutes.
You'd buy a minute.
That's what you get if you need a second phone to do your drug deals and shit.
Yeah, it's a burner.
Yeah.
Everybody was selling mids on a Primeco phone in Houston in the early 2000s.
Dylan was sending Black Market East in bats.
Yeah.
I asked Dylan. Made good money on that. I wasn't Black Market East and Bats. Yeah. I asked Dylan.
Made good money on that.
I wasn't sure if Dylan
had a phone before texting
was a thing.
I legitimately asked him
that question.
That's not an unfair question,
sadly,
for a significantly older
than everyone here.
My first phone had
texting capabilities.
It was also a Next Telephone.
It was a walkie-talkie
and a regular cell phone.
Oh, damn.
That was so annoying.
Dude.
Yep.
Yeah, dude. People love that shit. i had a pager a beeper in high school i'm trying to recall if i had a beeper what is
what does a beeper do your mom would if you're at the movies too late she would send you a beep
you'd look and you'd go call her from a pay phone just you'd send someone your number that
it lets them know like please call me so there's no text in it it's just like hey you're gonna you should you can text you can
text but you only short message it'd be like just call me or whatever yeah so that was the idea was
now you need to go find a phone to call this person right got it got it i don't even know
it's really funny that that was even a step in the process like somebody was like yeah what if
we create a beeper and then how no one else in the room was like why don't we just make a fucking
cell phone and skip this stupid step?
Somebody had like a really good four years.
Yeah.
When beepers were like, yeah.
And then just, just, it was over.
And then he cashed out.
He's like, fuck.
For a while though, yeah, you weren't shit if you didn't have a beeper.
Like, is there some dude out there living the yacht life because he invented the beeper?
Has to be.
I bet there is.
Has to be.
Yeah, he's out there.
Good for that guy.
Shouts to him.
But anyway, flip phone with a touch screen. Not going to be i bet there is has to be yeah he's out good for that guy shouts to him um but anyway flip phone
with a touch screen not gonna be for me although razors were tight remember the first time you got
like nudes on a razor and the verizon like you don't start spinning oh man it would take like
10 minutes to download yeah i'd be done before the wheel even stopped yeah you didn't you didn't
even care about the picture no it was like this the anticipation was the experience it's like one megapixel yeah i had a razor uh and i was i was i was a big fan i
held out like a really long time before i came became an iphone guy because i was like no i can't
be that good i was being stubborn and then i switched and now that you're it's funny i don't
know if there will ever be cell phone news that i care about again because I'll be an iPhone guy until I die barring
some miracle or freak accident like Motorola can't drop something that's gonna make me switch phones
it can't Samsung I don't care how many Google pixels come out I don't care I can't switch it
up now I'm done I'm cashed out I'm 30 fucking two this is the phone i'm using forever and i want
that scares me a little brett well you know what it doesn't scare me it provides a little bit of
stability in my life to be honest like i'm gonna be an iphone guy through and through for the next
60 years at least you know even as it gets shittier with every model like because it is it's gotten
worse and worse ever since steve jobs died uh and not even like directly i'm just saying
that's sort of when it started to slide i'm not like steve jobs was everything he was the only
reason apple is great i don't fucking care i'm just saying every time they update this bitch
it gets a little worse they literally named jobs after him that's how many people he employed dude the auto the autocorrect is the worst it's ever been at this point to where
are y'all experiencing the austin all caps problem when you type the word austin well you're gonna
get it at some point it's gonna happen and when you when it happens it's the end austin every
time you spell it out now will become all caps for no reason and it is a nightmare it happens to barrett all the time too
every word i type in gets corrected to something that's a thousand syllables off from what it was
supposed to be it's a nightmare it's awful it's awful the worst i haven't had that experience yet
but now i'm not looking forward to that anyway i have i have legitimate breaking news dave
okay the instagram update it's the one that just happened really did they take likes away likes are no more officially
officially drop a gram dylan dude i'm about to what what dude if you are to update instagram
your posts will now say liked by person uh at whoever and thousands of others or hundreds of
others oh you don't want to get that hundreds. Or tens of others.
Oh, really?
Bro, that's somehow more disorienting and terrifying.
Tens of others?
If I ever have to see that, I might die.
Does that even make sense grammatically?
I only know, well, to be fair,
I only have the thousands of others look.
It could be dozens.
It could be others until you reach a certain point.
Then you hit thousands.
I don't know.
Now, as a social media professional,
I'm aware of a situation.
Dylan just mentioned he doesn't have the update yet.
When they roll these things out,
you get them in chunks.
It could be a couple days before I have the update,
but you've got it already,
which always bums me out.
I don't have it.
Source on Twitter has it.
But you, as the user,
can see how many likes you get to the exact number.
So if you're running an e-com situation...
Okay, then you can still get your stats you need.
Yeah, you can still give stats to brands
or whoever needs that data,
but it is invisible to others.
Wow.
The files are in the computer.
Shit's about to go down.
Man, that's something Dave
Well Ross thanks for joining us
Here on the Circling Back Podcast
You're welcome
Thank you again
Thanks for doing it man
Thank you for having me
I'm gonna go sleep
The rest of the weekend
Heck yeah
Dave and I gotta go to Cabo tomorrow
This weather is poopy
Y'all enjoy Mexico
Don't spike the football
You didn't say Cabeza watch
A single time
What's that about?
I don't know.
But yeah,
we hope to come back
with our Cabasas.
But you never know.
You don't do
Cabasa watch anymore?
You're not concerned
for your own head anymore?
My Cabasa might
come back in a box.
Jeez.
It'd be real unfortunate.
What's in the box?
What's in the box?
You know,
if it happens, Dylan,
I hope that box
gets sent to me.
I'll treat your head right.
Thanks, man.
You're welcome.
It means a lot.
You're welcome. Thanks for having me, guys hope that box gets sent to me. I'll treat your head right. Thanks, man. You're welcome. It means a lot. You're welcome.
Thanks for having me, guys.
Will you freeze mine?
Yes.
Ted Williams style?
But I'm going to be honest with you.
I'm going to thaw it out and refreeze it a couple times just to see what that does.
Yeah, that's fine.
Do what you want.
Okay.
All right.
Good stuff.
I had fun today.
Thanks, Bill.
Where can we follow you?
At WR Bowling.
That's it.
On the Grom?
On the Grom.
On the Quiet. On the Sni? On the Grom, on the quiet, on the snipe.
Add me on the group.
Oh, that is sexy.
One more time.
Add me on the group.
Wow.
Never going to get old.
Bye.
I got to get one of these.
Bye-bye.