Circling Back - Coffee Friday 006: Full English Breakfast Blend
Episode Date: January 6, 2023No rundown, just vibes. You know what it is — Coffee Friday. Who survives the longest if we went on Hot Ones, the Sinaloan cartel, Dave's father-in-law finds a signed first edition Harry Potter book... at an estate sale, the squad might start covering Love Island, Prince William vs. Prince Harry, a really accurate description of what's going on in congress, and so much more. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low as $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel — www.youtube.com/circlingback Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop Support This Episode’s Sponsors Fitbod: www.fitbod.me/steam (20% off) Nutrafol: www.nutrafol.com/men (CIRCLING for $15 off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Coffee's for closers only.
You think I'm fucking with you?
I'm not fucking with you.
I'm not fucking with you.
Coffee's for closers only.
Closers only.
Coffee's for closers only.
I'm Kajal.
I'm Kajal.
Welcome back to the Circling Back Podcast.
New theme song.
Means one thing, one thing only.
It's Coffee Friday.
My name's Will DeFries.
To my left, David.
The Bing.
Rough.
I'm Binged up.
Big me.
Low, low, low.
This is my first Coffee Friday with a cappuccino.
Wow.
Wow, dude.
Wow, dude.
Imagine drinking that much milk with your bing bong.
Whole milk, steamed.
You got it from across the street?
Damn, I didn't know you could milk a whole.
I don't know.
Okay.
I saw Rebecca Black was trending, so I was like, oh, let's check in on her.
Yeah.
I think she dunked on Andrew Tate.
No, she didn't dunk on him, dude.
She sniped him from
yeah she sniped him from afar and he dropped immediately yeah that was surgical man she got
in there people are using this opportunity to um ride the viral trend by just posting
uh rebecca black looking uh pretty pretty hot do you think uh like when andrew tate first saw the
it's friday video back in the day
and he was roasting her with his boys in high school at the lockers,
do you think that he would be getting dunked on by that girl
at some point in his life?
That's a good question.
I consider myself to be someone who is aware of the MMA world,
not necessarily like random kickboxing leagues, things like that.
But the Andrew Tate phenomenon of the last six months
has completely caught me off guard.
I didn't know who he was,
and I'm seeing way more of him than I want to.
I don't know why he is worthy of all of this.
I mean, he is a supreme douche.
I noticed him getting some Reddit play recently.
Yeah, probably three or four months ago,
I knew about him for the first time
because he's just a controversial douche figure
and polarizing.
Douche figure.
Yeah.
I mean, people really admire this guy.
That dude hates women's rights.
It's very disturbing.
He's not a big fan of women's rights.
If you are an Andrew Tate guy,ate guy supporter or gal you are just a
total loser total in every every sense you know what i've been calling him andrew taint that's
good yeah you get it yeah yeah like a taint yeah yeah it's just to like roast him a little bit you
know a lot of people are just figuring out that Rebecca Black is all growns up.
It takes some very simple math skills to figure out that she's probably pretty much an adult by now.
She was probably like what?
Like 14, 15 when she did that music video?
13.
13.
And that was a while ago.
So yeah, she's probably like 20 now.
How many Fridays between that one and this one?
Let's see.
There are 52 a year.
Well, it depends if it's a leap year.
You never know.
Yeah. Because that could're 52 a year. Well, it depends if it's a leap year. You never know. Yeah.
Because that could fall on a Friday, that 29th of February.
Okay.
So it could be 53, technically speaking.
Was that the bathroom?
I heard a door and I got worried.
Yeah.
Because the only person out there is your son.
Yeah, Parks is out there.
And your partner.
Yeah.
Maybe he's getting a two off.
No big deal.
He knows how to handle himself in there.
Cool.
Speaking of.
Cool.
Hey, Dave, I would like to commend you for being here today.
I know January 6th is a big day for you.
Yeah.
I'm surprised you're not out celebrating with your boys.
That's after this.
Oh, okay.
That's after our TMD meeting and after our Washed Media meeting.
Oh, okay.
Now we're going to go.
Where's Brett?
We're going to Capitol Grill ironically where's brett where is brett yeah brett's been off this week and he said
he was he said he was going on a boys trip i was wondering based on the photos he was posting i was
like okay he could be in utah or he could be in the greater virginia washington dc area yeah those new two areas look
a lot alike yeah i think a lot of the the restaurant scene in salt lake looks a lot like
georgetown in washington dc yeah interesting the bullet didn't know that about him taking a shot
at the capitol hey can someone i obviously know what's
going on with this vote in congress and stuff like i obviously understand like what's happening
and why they're still doing it but like i think there's a lot of backers out there who might need
like a little clarification i obviously know too but i don't want to like i don't want to
mansplain to people and feel you know yeah jerick so dave you just want to like like in simple terms
at one point like i asked sally what was going on and like she obviously explained it to me and feel you know yeah jeric so dave you just want to like like in simple terms at one
point like i asked sally what was going on and like she obviously explained it to me and i obviously
totally understood her explanation but like there are still people out there who maybe don't know
what's going on and so i just figure like maybe we should let dave take talk about well we're
entering our fourth day of the uh standoff over the U.S. House Speaker.
Republican Kevin McCarthy,
his perilous quest to become Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives,
entered the fourth day on Friday
with a scale of congressional dysfunction
not seen since before the Civil War.
Yeesh.
Dang.
That means tonight's going to be the fortnight.
Apparently.
I don't follow this that closely,
but I did see.
That was okay.
That was good.
Don't roll your eyes.
Video game.
I'm trying to reach the Gen Z guys.
There's been worse.
What's up, Gen Z?
There will be worse.
There will be blood.
I don't need to connect with Gen Z.
I drink your speaker.
Why doesn't he just start talking
if he's the speaker?
I saw that Matt Gacy...
I said it was going to get worse.
Dude, they should do a Bluetooth speaker
at the house.
It's just... Okay, Photoshop photoshop that behind like the the you got biden given the state of the union and then you got behind him a bluetooth speaker yeah since we can't determine a speaker why don't
we just vote the bluetooth in that's not bad we can just broadcast from that yeah it's not bad
we can do speaker drops okay so what, man, probably just as effective at governing.
Hey, you know, it would make a lot of sense with all the wealth a Bluetooth speaker has.
Why is it taking so long?
You know that we are ruled by the rich.
Yeah.
Why is it taking so long?
I don't know, because there's like a handful of Republicans who are voting against it,
and people are mad.
I don't know.
I just can't. I just can't. I don't, I just, I can't, I just can't,
I can't follow it closely like I used to.
There was a time where this would have been like,
college Dave would have been super into this.
Poli-Sci Dave would have been like,
wow, this is fascinating.
And now I'm just like, I'm just nihilism Dave.
Does Marjorie have her fingerprints on this one?
Yes.
No, no, Marjorie actually, actually-
Is she supportive?
I don't like to do what I'm about to do,
but I've been told that Marjorie is actually not the issue right now.
So, yeah, we're okay.
Good for her.
You love her, man.
I mean, yeah, dude, just a big MJT guy.
Or MTG.
Not a big speller.
I've got some breaking news.
This is actual breaking news.
The Wi-Fi in my home is out.
So we might be getting a guest in the office
who has been scheduled to work from home today.
Is this person maybe married to you?
Does she know that Paneras exist that serve absolute gas?
I told her.
I told her go to one of the 48 coffee shops
within a mile radius of our home.
Oh, get her in here, man.
Are you guys going to go to the radio coffee shop, Grateful Dead cover band tonight?
I'd rather see a radio head cover band.
Trying to park there on a regular Tuesday at like 10 a.m. is literally impossible.
I don't know how I would get there when there's an actual decent cover band.
That do be facts.
The worst part, just you circle for two hours, and then finally you park a mile and a half
away. Dave, can I circle back real hours, and then finally you park a mile and a half away.
Dave, can I circle back real quick?
Oh, yes.
He did it.
During your, when Poli-Sci Dave was a thing,
did you ever go through a prime minister's questions phase?
No.
Are you aware of what that is?
Am I going to sound stupid if I don't?
No.
No, I don't think so.
Sally had no idea
what it was no every week they gather i guess parliament or whatever and they just they just
pepper the prime minister with a bunch of questions it's the most entertaining television
ever i don't even know what they're talking about half the time but it's awesome i am aware of this
i didn't know that's what it was called and every time i see it like many people i'm like man we
need something like that here i used to say that now i think it would just get a little
out of hand no can you imagine can you imagine no essentially our prime minister's questions
is just the press secretary talking right is it i don't know like but it's not even close
they're just peppering you what are they talking about like tea and crumpets and shit? You like the pepper?
Hmm?
We need to talk about the rising cost of crumpets.
I pull up to your table.
I just served you a Caesar salad, and I say, you like the pepper?
And I go.
Right.
I don't even look at my.
Tell me when, daddy-o. i don't look at my salad when
they're cracking the pepper i just look the dude in the eyes and just see when he wants me to stop
it's just a game of blink that'll be that'll be enough yeah it's pepper chicken sir this is
i'm gonna have to refill the shaker that's a good bit actually that is can we actually have
someone at a restaurant just go like just go and do it until they're out of pepper?
That would make me so uncomfortable all day.
And ask for more.
A bad bit with no payoff would be a really, really nice steakhouse.
Picture the best steakhouse in town.
Very expensive.
Four stars, Michelin.
You understand.
Vince Young.
Vince Young.
Let's go.
I'm listening.
You pull up.
You order a salad.
The guy comes out to give you pepper, and he dressed all nice and it's very formal and instead of doing the pepper shaker he just has a little
handheld one like from your kitchen and just starts dumping it on there man at italian restaurants
when they come out with that the big wheel of parmesan and they they you know yeah i never want
them to stop like just keep going i stop out of of just guilt. For me, it's the pepper.
When they start peppering that Caesar salad,
I never want it to stop.
You can quickly over-pep.
I want to cough when I eat that first romaine leaf.
I like a good sneeze before the salad bite.
I got a pepper corn in my mouth.
Did you guys ever have hot sauce guy in your crew?
Oh, my God.
The guy who just wanted everybody to know
that he wanted his spicy, and this isn't going to do it. We're going to need more spice. sauce guy in your crew oh my god the guy who he was like just wanted everybody to know that
he wanted his spicy and like this isn't gonna do it we're gonna need more spice does he bring his
own no well probably but i've never seen it but this one guy i'm thinking of he would be like
oh i i'd tell the way to bring more yeah i need to spice i need a habanero yeah
how many scoville units is that um i i made a mistake last night are you guys familiar with uh valentina's
hot sauce i am not valentina's it's good very good um it turns out their wheat picante version
is wheat picante i found that out the hard way last night after I put it on my vegetables that I was eating for dinner.
My veggie mix that we sauteed with some pasta.
I don't remember the last time that I felt this much heat in my mouth.
Damn, son.
I looked it up.
It wasn't even that bad.
I do.
Like, in terms of Scovies.
That time I'd spit at those bars at open mic night.
Remember that?
I had some heat in my mouth.
Dave, you were there.
Are you okay?
Sally was trying to get me to kiss.
She was trying to get me to give Fritz a kiss, like goodnight before bed.
And I was like, I'm not kissing him with this mouth.
You light him up.
Dude, I'm on fire right now.
Do you ever get sad?
I think my core temperature dropped because it was trying to offset how hot I was getting.
I don't know if it works.
I was very cold. Does Fritz ever deny you the kiss and you feel sad? You're like, okay I don't know if it works. I was very cold.
Does Fritz ever deny you the kiss and you feel sad?
You're like, okay.
Dude, he loves it still.
Rhodes is batting about
I'd say 500.
He plays hard to get.
He makes you earn it.
I'm just trying.
I'll see you in the morning.
Chill out, Dad.
Kids, man.
What are you looking at, bro?
You look distraught.
I know.
I was Googling to see if you could actually have your body temperature drop if you ate
something spicy enough.
What'd you find?
I didn't find anything.
I mean, there's information out there, but me reading it would have taken forever.
So instead, I'm actually going to do this ad read.
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Very cool.
Who do you think, if we went on Hot Ones,
you guys familiar with Hot Ones?
Oh, yeah.
If we went on Hot Ones,
who could make, like,
everyone makes it to the end,
but who would have the easiest time doing it?
Do you guys consider yourselves Spice Kings?
I'm not one of these, like these macho tough guys who's like, oh, I can handle any kind of – no, I can't.
I can tolerate spice, but I have a threshold.
They let you on there.
They let you, if you're a vegetarian, do cauliflower instead of doing wings, and I think that makes it easier.
I have a theory that that makes it easier.
You've seen people do it?
Well, my theory is that if you're doing wings you have it on your fingers you get it on your mouth
and you get it everywhere oh yeah and i think that like when you have it on the perimeter of
your mouth and stuff it's it's way more spicy whereas if you have a thing a cauliflower you
can just put that in your mouth don't have to worry about the mess getting everywhere put it in
we're not doing that we're certainly not doing that.
Remember that joint, Dave?
What the fuck is wrong with that?
Yeah, everyone had that downloaded on LimeWire.
Dave remembers that joint.
Yeah, I do, but I try not to sing it.
You're a scumbag, man.
Listen to that trash.
Yeah, we've literally sang it.
Listen to that.
What are you doing?
Ding dong.
What was his name?
Akinyele or something?
This guy knows who it is.
I don't know.
What the fuck's wrong with you?
Yeah.
Yep.
That's a good guess. How's it go? I didn yeah that's a good guess how's it go i didn't have that
uh no how's it go no um i wouldn't do that well on that show i don't think i don't like a spicy
i think i do okay but i don't i think i would definitely need every single thing that they
have there in order to like dampen it do they have milk yeah you can you they have everything you need in order to survive okay you know i've had limited experience trying to um
quell a spicy mouth milk's never done it for me i know that's what they say to do but milk just
i feel like it doesn't work for me i would need to drink a full gallon of milk in order for it to
actually affect what's going on that's a lot of i don't i mean i know you're not supposed to drink
water but like the one thing that feels the best to me is just putting an ice cube in my mouth and just sitting
there yeah okay okay i have an anecdote would you like to hear story time with davy ruff
my father-in-law acquired something over the um holiday break and i think it's a couple people maybe one maybe none
we'll find it interesting he is a uh the type of guy who does estate sales goes to them likes to
find stuff he sells whole states how much do those cost no it's only states that start with s
s states so it's like so it's like yeah south car South Carolina, South Dakota. All the Souths. Yeah.
Okay.
Well, he was at a thrift shop, which is not an estate sale, but it's similar.
The one from Macklemore?
You can find good deals.
We were tasked with bringing something to the pod, and I'm bringing it.
Dylan brought nothing.
I'm sorry.
It's a Macklemore reference.
Shocking.
That's a good Macklemore reference
He found
A Harry Potter book
For a dollar
And he acquired it
Said Harry Potter book is the English version
Of the Goblet of Fire
And said book is signed by J.K. Rowling
Really? That's a pretty good pickup
I thought so
This is a Pawn Stars episode So my buddy had all the English versions by JK Rowling. Really? That's a pretty good pickup. I thought so. And he just sent me a photo.
This is a Pawn Stars episode.
So my buddy had all the English versions
because he was early on Harry Potter.
And I think they're actually pretty cool
compared to the American version.
Is that a first edition?
Yeah.
What edition is this?
That's edition numero uno.
Did he know it was signed when he bought it?
Or did he just buy it?
It is worth in...
It is going from anywhere from $4,000 to $12,000.
How do you know that?
Because he looked it up.
Yeah.
I'll give him $3,000 for it right now.
Tell him to take it to Rick Harrison in Vegas, and he'll be on TV.
That's a pawn star.
Tell him to bring it to my wife, who will probably just outbid herself and pay way too much money for that.
Ooh.
I'm not going to have him bring it to Chris Harrison.
That's so stupid.
Not Chris, Rick.
What's Chris going to do?
I don't know, man.
Probably bring it to the course.
That's all he does.
That's all he does.
He just plays golf.
Just dominates the steakhouse bar and plays golf at Barton Creek.
I couldn't cancel it.
It's pretty sweet.
You just go play golf all the time.
Yeah, he got canceled and then got paid out.
He got the badge.
That's awesome.
And nobody talks about this.
Yeah, everyone that gets canceled gets more Instagram followers
and then gets to play golf more.
That sounds great.
And he got off right when The Bachelor was on its descent.
Or maybe it went downhill because he went off the show.
I don't know.
He was fine.
He was a host.
Should we have our listeners cancel us,
but not for anything specific and just say we're're canceled and then just just to get the hype going because we don't have uh
we don't have a golden parachute yeah we don't have nothing to fall back on yeah okay this is
our livelihood okay didn't he get like 15 mil it's like all right you're not gonna say anything
right not only do you not have to work anymore we're gonna give you a lot of money yeah you just
can't talk about all the weird shit that went on. Yeah.
And they're like,
not only that,
but we're going to completely tank the brand.
Once you walk out that door.
Oh no.
We're going to name a bachelor that no one has heard of.
Oh,
your new bachelor.
Tim.
Larry.
Oh,
Tim.
There's some,
does,
does that show make it through 2024? don't think it does no i don't
think it i don't think it's not in its current format i think they have to pivot it would have
to be all streaming or something they've got to move it to they've got to add something some kind
of wild card that's not just like you're saying they need a they need a cost more guy a low-key feel bad for uh stabbing cabin the
barstool podcast who keeps covering it like it's still okay a popular show yeah but like i feel
like kelly keegs is so deep in the game that she loves it i know but like they have to know that
like no not many people are watching the wall i think they still do pretty well based on the numbs
the numbs are going down the pod i mean not the you have based on the numbs. The numbs are going downhill. The pod, I mean.
Not the show.
Do you have access to their numbs?
They do good on social.
I just feel bad for anyone covering this.
It's a social play.
We cut bait a little bit.
We got out.
I thought we were going to do Milf Mansion or whatever.
Manor.
What if...
So, did you guys see...
I can't...
This is actually perfect for us.
Y'all saw what happened, right?
New Love Island, January 16th, UK edition, baby.
I'll do it.
Is it easy to watch?
Let's do one, let's do every Friday.
I will do it.
Patreon or?
I don't know.
I just realized that this is coming out.
Wait, which show?
Love Island, UK, January 16th.
Dave, this is the perfect time to get in.
Do I have to go back and watch all the other ones?
No, absolutely not.
Absolutely not.
That's the beauty of the show.
So here's the issue.
Here's the issue that we have, and maybe the listeners have,
maybe people out there have some advice.
It's a grind, but it's a fun grind.
It's on almost every night.
It's kind of like the bean grinding that you were doing
during yesterday's pod.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Let's do it.
Fuck it.
Let's ride.
So here's the issue that we have.
Five nights a week?
UK sometimes goes six.
But one of them is like, they have like a recap show.
It's not like a recap.
It's more of a bloopers show that no one watches.
Yeah, we're not going to do those.
Only like the real episodes.
So here's the issue, though, is that it releases in the UK uh prior to the us so it's like a two-week delay do we cover it like
live or do we cover it on the delay for the americans delay because but because if we do
it live not enough americans will be up to speed with us i I know. I'm so deep in the game, bro. Are you talking U.S. Americans? Yeah.
Like, such as?
Uh-huh.
What about the Iraq?
What happened to her?
Is she all right?
I think she's probably doing fine, but she married well.
Yeah, she married some dude.
She's living in some Texas suburb in a mansion that's bigger than all the houses that I live in combined.
She's in Prosper.
Her son's like an up-and-coming like the end yeah i got some more run on the tl the other day and i
can only watch like the first 10 seconds because what's your son's coming what's your son's name
like uh tanner brayton yeah brayton b-r-e-i-g-h-t-y-n yeah peyton p-e-i-g-h-t-o-n
i saw that one recently.
Mario Lopez in it is the real star at the end where he's just like,
thank you.
He's just got that smirk.
He's like, I have nothing else to say here. When I see that on the TL, I think, if that were me, I couldn't handle it.
If I were him, I would have just been done.
I would have walked off.
I couldn't stop laughing.
You see the wheels start to wobble. If I were him, I would have just been done. I would have walked off. I couldn't stop laughing. You know something.
You see the wheels start to wobble.
You see the steering wheel get tight.
And the next thing you know, the wheels just fly off.
Yeah.
Everything's off the rails.
She just kept digging.
She kept digging.
U.S. like the maps, world maps?
U.S. Americans?
Like such as?
Oh.
That's an all-time internet clip.
Real internet heads know.
Yeah.
Can't talk.
Did you guys see?
There was a viral tweet going around about the one word in the middle school spelling bee that kicked you out.
Everyone remembers their word.
I only did an elementary school one.
Really?
Yeah.
I did it through high school.
And mine was hearth.
I'll never forget mine. Left the E out. did it through high school. And mine was Hearth.
I'll never forget mine. Left the E out.
Oh, yeah, because Hearth and Soul in Austin.
Yeah.
Isn't that a store?
I don't know.
It's a store like down the street from you.
That's the one where Danica Patrick did the candle signing.
Dude, do I need to do a candle signing?
Yes, you do.
I didn't know I had Danica competing with me.
She is on your turf.
Am I about to put Danica Patrick in the ground?
Don't kill her.
Yeah.
She's an icon.
No, but she thought Aaron Rodgers was worth dating.
Are we sure that I shouldn't just like...
You see who he's dating now?
Yeah, he went with that Leo diet.
Who is he?
Is she... He's she heiress to the
milwaukee bucks yeah she 26 is she falling um you can guess i think there's people in the world who
would think she's pretty how do i find her uh it's all research go to barstool or something
yeah i don't know just go to like go toSM Girls? What was your word that kicked you out?
The most brutal one was one that I second-guessed myself,
and it was Norwegian.
I left out the I. I still think it's kind of weird that we had proper nouns.
Dude, Parsons had one.
What?
We're just doing proper nouns?
They had proper nouns on there.
I didn't know we were doing that.
So I thought that was a little weird.
Also hyphenated words.
Yeah.
I had the judges' cars tug once I found out.
That's good.
Smart.
That's a play out of the old...
I got to the semifinal in district.
What did you get out on?
Come.
C-O-M-E, and I spelled it differently.
How'd you spell it?
Hit the Jessica Simpson button one time for him.
Spelled it differently.
It's on the wrong soundboard.
Okay, I'll do it.
I'm trying to, I'm trying to come.
You're hella horny on this one.
My buddy, he's a certified opto boy.
Friday horny.
He got out on the word principal.
He didn't clarify. He didn't he didn't he didn't
clarify he didn't ask for it dude that's what that death you gotta you gotta you gotta revert
to say by the bell you knew prince of pal you always know you always know that in the high
school spelling bee or the middle school spelling bee they're gonna have one word that they need to
ask because they want they want you to think about it they want you to think about it i had a teacher
his name was Mr. Gene.
And he threw up the word gene to me.
Mr. Gene.
I was like, what are you doing right now?
That's sick.
That's messed up.
Did you ask him for the deaf?
I spelled it the way that he spells his name.
And then he literally said, and this is fifth grade, he said, that wasn't fair.
I'm going to give you a new word.
I was like, give me a new word.
That sounds great.
If I'm one of the people in the class who had already gotten out,
I am absolutely revolting.
Mr. Gene did love to spell.
I think he's still alive.
His spelling days are behind him.
He spelled his last word.
But if you're in fifth grade and you see a kid in that class,
get a word wrong
and then he gets a second chance aren't you furious i'm tipping over my desk it's affluenza
i'm i'm writing huh you're going jan 6 on the spelling bee yeah i'm storming the principal's
office you're storming the school board y Y'all need to watch This Place Rules.
I'm going to.
I'm going to tonight, actually.
It's –
Bay will be gone.
You're going to get high in there?
Oh, man.
Oh, it's Friday, dude.
Dry January.
No one said anything about burning.
He's right, dude.
Yeah, dude.
I'm actually doing California Sober January.
What does that mean?
What is that? We that we gotta clip that
really you know yeah you know oh yeah dude whole squad burning tonight yeah oh i had to i had to
explain the uh the alien pipe out there to parks because it looks like a coffee mug but he's like
why is that it's a water fountain why does that thing come out and have a hole in it like i don't
know man it's some people drink coffee like that yeah some people drink coffee out of the handle But he's like, why is that thing? It's a water fountain. Why does that thing come out and have a hole in it? Like, I don't know, man.
Some people drink coffee like that. Yeah, some people drink coffee out of the handle.
It's totally not a bong.
Just tell him it's hard to say.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's definitely not a bong.
But when he's like 18, is weed going to be even more normalized than it is now?
It's probably not going to be a big deal at all.
Yeah.
That's why I burn in front of my son all the time.
Just because I'm like, dude, it's going to be normal by the time you're 18, bro.
That's sick, man. Yeah, my son all the time, just because I'm like, dude, it's going to be normal by the time you're 18, bro. That's sick, man.
Yeah, dude.
I don't do that.
I don't do that.
Have you ever seen you pop a little gummy, though?
I don't know.
He's seen me drink a beer or two.
To him, it's like 18.
Yeah.
He started them early.
Yeah, he's seen me nurse a beer all afternoon,
that's for sure.
He's seen his dad drink exactly one beer.
Yeah, he has.
Not a big drinker around the house these days.
I always like to think of
myself as a guy who will go and pour a nightcap i just don't do that oh i have wine regularly at
home after a day at work it's not that exciting okay i don't know why i shared that yeah you
can move on from that real real housewives have washed. Starring Dylan.
Mike is doing Sober January.
Of course.
And he texted me and he said that we should do something together
since both he and I are not drinking during January.
Should I proposition him with like a really miserable plan for something?
Yeah, y'all should go to like a museum.
Should I be like, hey, like I have this event,
but I don't want to tell you about it because it's pretty exciting
and that it's like an Austin FC game or something?
It's like a kid's birthday party. You don't even to tell you about it because it's pretty exciting that it's like an austin fc game or something it's like a kid's birthday party you don't even know you're showing
up i don't want to do that we've decided road's second birthday party is going to be uh family
only why wow i had so much fun at his first i was gassing beers dude um we rang you we we ran you
dry a guinness set at your party that is true That is true. And we had a toddy bar.
We did.
Shout out to my sister for the toddy bar.
I don't know.
Just kind of like, eh.
I was there.
Just give up.
Yeah, you were there.
You brought a great gift that didn't get a lot of run the first few months after.
And then when he really, really got mobile, he loved that thing.
He took to the streets, didn't he?
Yeah.
It became a problem. Tell us what you got. he took to the streets didn't he yeah it became a problem
tell us what you got it was like the it's like the car that you a little plastic uh they've been
around for decades that little plastic uh car there's a name for it fisher prize something
yeah you've seen him he wanted to bring it every time we walked randy and um unfortunately it's
very very hard to walk a dog and like guide a child in that thing at
the same time why didn't he just flintstone it he the little guy just doesn't have the the power in
the legs like his daddy he's gonna have the hands hamstring strength to propel like fred flintstone
got it yabba dabba doo.
Yabba dabba doo.
How many on Betty Roval? I think the world's high right now.
Huh?
What'd you say?
What's up?
He said yabba dabba doo.
It's a line from Flintstones.
Oh, right, right, right.
I think I liked the Flintstones, but I don't really know why.
They're sick.
I don't think it was that good, was it?
I don't know.
It's not as good as our friends over at neutrophil no that's good i don't think fred flintstone took neutrophil
because i think he had some absolute dog in him but i think over the years we've started to learn
a lot about hair loss and uh neutrophils out here just to absolutely just help us all out
and and it's not even just that i mean my my scalp coverage i'm concerned about it
a lot of these a lot a lot of the time by 35 it starts to thin out there i turned 36 the other And it's not even just that. I mean, my scalp coverage, I'm concerned about it.
A lot of the time by 35, it starts to thin out there.
I turned 36 the other day, boys.
I'm so sorry.
I mean, I'm glad that you guys haven't commented about how thin my hair is looking,
but you also haven't commented about my physique either. So it's kind of hard times out here for your boy.
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What you got?
I just was looking at breaking news on Twitter
and I did see yesterday where they the
mexican officials uh captured el chapo's son and immediately people are doing the little chopper
they call them breaking news el chapo son captured and then space the cartel and then it's just like
a clip from uh war zone i'm just a bunch of like did y'all see what
was happening after they captured him uh uh the tweet that i read said that the cartel went into
quote chaos mode and just started like spraying the block chaos what's their problem man they
got this dude vacuum a power vacuum this isn't the first time this has happened either there's
my wife this is a this is a this is like this has happened before when they get high-ranking
officials in the cartel that they'll just like start shooting just start spraying the block
it's not good it's not good that it's a it's terrifying is what it is man imagine being law
enforcement on a border town in Mexico.
Uh-uh.
How funny is it that Alyssa's just out there at Parks right now?
Yeah.
Dude, they're just vibing.
She's just like, what's up?
Parks is probably like, finally, like a fucking adult finally walked in.
That's true.
She knows how to handle a kid.
Been a teacher.
She's a mom.
Well, yeah.
Parks is in good hands out there.
She knows we're in here podding
what kind of tools do they have the cartel not to get back they got it all i don't think i don't
think like i don't think they have like glorifying the cartel they have tommy cuts see what i was
like they're a little bit michigan like i didn't think of the cartel as being an actual thing
like since moving down here like it's a little more real since you uh vacationed by some
dead bodies hanging from a bridge yeah we need to do maybe it's not really it's not a conspiracy
but it could be it could fit on that pod the uh cartel hit on the south lake attorney
um who is a cartel lawyer formerly in like a parking lot of like south lake which is a very
very affluent suburb of dallas fort worth, like in like the shopping center, like the big South Lake village or whatever.
Like they just blew up his, they didn't blow up his car, but they lit him up in his car.
And it was like, it's a straight up hit.
That's what they do.
They love a parking lot hit.
A cartel lawyer.
Which side was he representing?
The cartel.
Previous.
See?
I'm not taking that job.
Whenever you're the cartel lawyer, you have to know that every walk through a parking
lot might be your last. You might not make it. I'm just not taking that job. Whenever you're the cartel lawyer, you have to know that every walk through a parking lot might be your last.
You might not make it.
I'm just not taking that phone call.
There's that famous airport shootout that they had.
Oh, depicted in Narcos.
Yeah.
That actually was a very famous thing.
No, I think it's over, right?
I thought there was like one more season
and it's like the rise of Topo.
They're doing what every show is doing right now
where they like make you think it's the final season,
like The Crown and Stranger Things.
And then they're just like, just kidding.
Okay.
Princess Diana's not dead yet.
You brought up The Crown.
And I think, I don't, tell me if this is out of bounds,
but have you seen the, you guys seen this?
The leaks from the upcoming Harry book?
Yeah.
Shout out to Spain who put it on the bookshelves early.
Is that what happened?
Yeah.
That's amazing.
They kind of willed to freeze it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's what happened with the Sports Illustrated issue when I got that Kate Upton cover.
That's still a wild story.
I know.
We could have hashed it out with Dave Portnoy when he was in Austin, but he skipped out
on us.
He wanted to hop on the mic.
Would have ended poorly for one person and one person only.
Randy.
Randy.
This fucking guy.
What if he poached Randy?
What if he's like, dude, I like the vibe of this Randy guy what if he poached randy what if he's
like dude i like the vibe of this randy you're a little wacky i'm taking him with me randy you're
coming with me if dave portnoy walked in the office and tried to steal randy i would like
randy would have to go with him right be like all right i guess i'm moving to new york
slack you what can somebody text or i think i got. You're trying to get the Wi-Fi password.
I don't know what it is. I think I got it.
I think.
I just –
You're saying it on air.
Is it still dummythick69?
Don't say it on air.
Oh.
Oh, is it – now we have to change everything from dummythick69.
Dude, you say that.
That's probably a password.
Yeah, probably something.
Like Brett's listening to
this two days later like oh god uh yeah who said the password for whatever
what are you doing anymore man so so william used to just punk harry
dude that's your brothers like i'm sorry but your brothers your brothers like you gotta put them on
the ground by the collar sometimes like i don't what I don't have a brother, but I had cousins who
beat the shit out of me. You think you did it?
I think you just held them by the collar like...
Why I oughta?
And you put up your dukes.
You're going to leave our family
and move to California
to start a podcasting company
with your wife.
My dear boy.
He did cocaine and he didn't like it.
Harry did?
Yeah.
He didn't like the way it felt,
just like the way it smelled.
You know what I'm saying?
He didn't like all that, I don't know,
exuberance, energy, and like chattiness.
Yeah.
And like, you know. I didn't read that chattiness yeah and like you know i didn't
read that part he didn't like how fun it was no i'm kidding i didn't read the part about the
cocaine didn't like how fun you know what i saw that on twitter maybe fake i think you did cocaine
though do it do we you know what okay it's non-addictive it would be weird if royals did
not do cocaine at least once you need your princes and princesses to be doing coke
at parties like that what do you why are you rich you're not going to do the coke at the parties oh
there's more to being rich than okay i gave her the wrong password i'm an idiot dude that's facts
let's try it um i mean yeah i like i want my royal families to be wild boys yeah that's it confirm randy got yeah i'd hook i'd do parks up the other day and
i just would be like 20 tries it's like and we have two different ones love that is there a guest
one no there's a 5g and a 2g i'm on my 5g shit i don't know about y'all 2g no one needs 2gs i'm
more of a triple g guy i'm G'd up from my feet up.
That's right.
G code.
I guess people call Greg Berhalter,
the US Men's National Team coach,
I guess they call him triple G
because he's got three Gs in his name,
in his first name.
You can't add a third G.
There's only one triple G, sir.
So does Popovich.
Maybe win a World Cup.
Popovich is a 3G guy?
Yeah.
Popovich is a 3G guy. I respect Popovich, but as a Pistons fan, I hate Popovich. He's a hell Cup. Popovich is a 3G guy? Yeah. Popovich is a 3G guy.
I respect Popovich, but as a Pistons fan, I hate Popovich.
He's a hell of a coach.
He is.
He might be getting that, forgot his name, that big dude.
French kid?
Shaquille O'Neal.
No, his playing days are behind him.
Did you see Chuck said asshole on TV yesterday?
He can't say that, apparently.
Did he get fined? He probably will. Do you get fin can't say that apparently. Did he get fined?
He probably will.
Do you get fined for that or does the network get fined?
Do they fine you?
If I'm the network, I'm like, y'all get like five a year, spice it up.
Get a viral clip.
I think it's kind of pricey. If I'm him and they try to go to him for that fine, like, dude, we've been like the best show for 15 years.
They don't care.
I don't think they actually care.
I think after 10 p.m. you get like one really bad swear word.
I don't think you can drop F-bombs, but I think you can say –
Come on, man.
Why?
No, I think you –
They don't give you one freebie.
You can't choose one of these because you don't like how i'm doing it
if they gave you a freebie everyone would use it because that's too fun not to
okay i just googled can you swear on tv after 10 p.m this is like the you can use
five seconds of any song and it won't it won't trigger a copyright issue it's not real okay
i found i found some information from Channel 4, the UK.
Have we talked about this before?
It's Channel 4.
The BBC.
This is in the UK.
After 9 p.m., whether or not offensive language is justified
will depend largely on the audience expectations and contact.
Hold on.
So there's a 9 p.m. rule in the UK.
A little subjective. I think it in the UK. A little subjective.
I think it's more objective.
Objectively subjective.
Remember when South Park started saying shit?
I never really watched South Park.
They said shit all the time.
And I don't know if this is the Comedy Central thing
or what was the deal there.
They've said worse.
I know, but how?
How did they get away with it?
Well, it's cable and it's it aired after 10 p.m i don't know but not in my time zone it was a nine o'clock i need to catch up on the last few seasons anyway what else you guys got we got a we
got a meeting with kj dude dylan's got got a chill-ass exposed pocket on his fucking sweater today.
I bought this thinking I was on the next wave, and no one else followed suit.
I was like, only one with this droopy-ass pocket.
I mean, it is a droopy-ass pocket, but exposed hemlines are in.
So you're in a good spot there.
Yeah, that's facts.
Looks like a little flap.
Am I in the right wave?
I wore a raw hem t-shirt recently.
A what?
Like a raw hem. Like the hem. Oh, it was raw? Yeah, I like a raw hem t-shirt recently. A what? Like a raw hem.
Like the hem.
Oh, it was raw?
Yeah, I like it raw.
Oh, really?
It looks like you have the excess meat from an Arby's roast beef sandwich.
It looks like someone had been pulling on it and stretched it out.
Yeah, kind of looks like you got pulled.
Yeah, like your girls.
Looks like Prince William just walked up to you and ripped your pocket off your frocket.
Made you do coke. What frat like Prince William just walked up to you and ripped your pocket off your frocket. Made you do coke.
What frat would Prince William have betted?
He's top tier.
You must go, S.A.E.
As long as we don't party with Tridelt,
because everyone else already has.
You are the one heir of Slytherin.
Don't forget your frat stompers.
You must not open the Chamber of secrets until i tell you didn't just watch that one or anything right i totally know what you're talking about damn
what was what were the secrets in that chamber a snake you know like a snake. It was just a rather large
snake.
Alright, guys. I got
bad news. Harry. Is it time?
Can I get you something?
You're out of bing bong. I'm out. I've finished mine.
This bing bong is gone,
which means it's time to end this episode.
To everyone out here who enjoys Coffee Fridays,
shout out to Coffee Friday.
Do we have any closing thoughts?
At DCRuff on Instagram, at DCarterRuff on Twitter, please follow me.
I'm begging you.
When are you going to consolidate these ads?
I just don't want to talk about it.
What about when Elon takes away your checkmark, you can change your official username?
Did you see what I did yesterday?
Nah.
I tweeted an Instagram link, and I was like, like oh but it's gonna do the thing where they
oh yeah you can't do that i don't know no i'm not i think they might might have dialed that back
like many things that they're like float and universally shit on and they're like yeah you
know we won't do that i think we're gonna bring back fleets fleets they called me will to fleet do you just set yourself up for that no fleety pablo over here
that's good
fleet budaj over here you're doing a lot mayor fleet
okay that's sick man big budaj guys My favorite Nickelodeon show, Fleet and Fleet.
I think it's time to get out of here.
End on a high.
Bye.
Bye.
Coffee's for closers only.
You think I'm fucking with you?
I am not fucking with you.
I am not fucking with you.
Coffee's for closers only.
Closers only.
Coffee's for closers only. I'm catch up. I'm catch up. Beep-bop. Closes on. Closes on. Closes on.
Closes on. Closes on.