Circling Back - Company Christmas Party Recap & Mailing It In
Episode Date: December 20, 2021The most mail-in week of the year? Maybe. But not for us because we're certified grind boys. We breakdown our Weekends in Fun, discuss the entirety of the company Christmas party, some all-time bad Ti...ktoks from the weekend, and more. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Purchase a Circling Back Candle: www.vellabox.com/circling-back Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (12:00) Recapping This Weekend in Fun (30:00) Washed Christmas Party Breakdown (50:00) Maybe Just Don’t Tiktok That (1:03:41) The Most Mail-In Time of the Year Support This Episode’s Sponsors Rhoback: www.rhoback.com (BACKER20 for 20% off) Cuts: www.cutsclothing.com/steam (15% off!) Headspace: www.headspace.com/circling (free one-month trial) Reliefband: www.reliefband.com (CIRCLING for 20% off + free shipping) Liquid IV: www.liquidiv.com (CIRCLINGBACK for 25% off) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
all right we're back circling back podcast presented by row back where you can get 20%
off your first order using code backER20. My name's Will.
To freeze to my left, David.
That boy.
Rough.
To everyone out there, Merry Christmas week.
Thank you.
Merry Christmas Eve week.
I just hope everybody's, what?
It's not Christmas Eve week.
What's a more fun day?
Christmas Eve or Christmas? Christmas Eve is fun because Christmas a more fun day? Christmas Eve or Christmas?
Christmas Eve is fun because Christmas is the next day.
Exactly.
So you could argue that the anticipation.
No.
It's kind of like edging Christmas.
The day before a vacation.
You're all excited, but the vacation.
Not even a minute in, Dave.
The vacation is the fun part.
You're edging Christmas already.
Well, what I'm getting at here is Christmas just has a lot of baggage.
It's a poor question.
Christmas has a lot of formal things you got to do.
Maybe you go to Mass.
I don't know how you celebrate.
But Christmas Eve, it's just kind of a free-for-all.
You can get a little boozed up.
Dylan, don't you just go to the Mass
with your entire family every single Christmas?
Don't you guys rent out an Alamo
and you just watch the Mass?
That would be a lot of fun.
You do midnight mask.
Ooh, I haven't purchased any eggnog yet.
I need to do that.
You know what's crazy?
Eggnog is so good when it's 80 degrees out.
Yeah.
Come on.
This weekend was prime eggnog weekend, dude.
And I missed it.
I didn't.
You know your boys are just sipping that lean.
That's not lean.
That's eggnog.
That's eggnog.
That's eggnog. Very different. You could put a little bit of would you put something in it you could spike
it bourbon do you know how much do you know how many calories are in a half cup of eggnog a lot
it was devastating when i put some of my coffee this morning my super fantastic sorry
put some of my i put a little splash my super fantastic Fantastic, and I was like, you know what? Splash of eggnog? Yeah.
Wow, I didn't know you were so feminine, dude.
Yes, you did.
Wow, dude. You definitely did.
What else did you put in there?
Dude, guess how many.
You do a little nutmeg on top of your nog?
Guess how many.
I'm a nutmeg boy.
Half a cup.
Half a cup?
I'm going to say 560 calories.
No, that's too many.
240 calories in half a cup of the eggnog that I bought.
I was like, damn.
Let me ask you this.
Glad I already drank most of it so I can't avoid it now.
More concern, sugar content.
Didn't even look.
Not even going to think about looking at that.
Sugar.
It was good enough that I actually don't feel that bad about it.
The eggnog on Saturday did be hitting.
I don't care.
It's the time of year.
Hey, it's the holidays, right?
Hey, it's Christmas Eve week.
Dude, that's what's up.
Do what you want to do.
It's Christmas week.
Do what you want to do.
Dude, it depends, though.
I'm more of a Christmas Eve guy.
Just kidding.
You're crazy for that take.
I didn't say I was.
I'm just saying I could see how someone might be.
No.
Christmas Eve, you could still link.
You're linking with the boys.
Christmas, you can't link with the boys.
You're with the fam.
You ready for this take?
Oh, I disagree.
You ready for this take?
Christmas night is a more friend night than Christmas Eve is.
And I'm going to say this, Dylan.
I'm so right on that.
Something you didn't think of.
You know I'm right, dog.
This entire Saturday, Christmas.
For the boys.
I'm going to be with, yeah, I'm going to have to be with my mom, Christmas, For the boys. I'm going to be,
yeah, I'm going to be,
I have to be my mom,
my sister, my wife.
It's like,
my niece.
It's like,
why don't you just
kick the women out?
I don't,
they should kick us out.
Make them sit on the porch
in the nice weather.
They should let the boys
go do like a private Christmas
in a log cabin
where we just drink black coffee.
Smoke cigars.
Smoke cigars.
Dip. We just dip. Suit shit. shit we just speak we speak in Ron Swanson quotes the entire day we just eat bacon
and just watch liver king videos yeah that's kind of sick that's the dream that's the only gift I
want the gift of Saturday being for the boys me and the boys just honoring our ancestors
do these things, Primals.
Can you do your Liver King impression?
Good morning, Primals.
That's what he calls people?
Primals? His squad,
his fandom, they're Primals.
That dude's soft.
Dude, I don't think he's that... I mean, he looks
pretty hard. Yeah, he looks like he's absolutely
rock solid, actually. Let me know when he's actually hunting his dinner instead of simulating it.
It's a successful simulated hunt.
What's an unsuccessful one?
One where he just doesn't get the fictitious beast.
It's not a real hunt.
How do you simulate a hunt?
You're either hunting or you're not.
Am I simulating fishing by going to the store and getting a salmon filet?
He just stalks his refrigerator for 30 minutes before he opens it.
He's just doing blow darts into packages of meat?
Got it.
There was a video.
That's so stupid.
Toss that chicken breast on the bobby.
He had a flamethrower, and he flamed some frozen pizzas for some reason.
I like that.
Does he eat pizza?
I thought he just ate, like, baby food.
No, I mean, like, he torched them to the point of without—
Oh, so they were inedible.
I thought he was cooking.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, no, no.
How did Mario spit fireballs in the ocean when he was swimming?
You guys ever think about that?
Was that Mario who did that?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
He did.
Yeah.
Was he spitting those?
I think he was spitting some.
We were talking about how simpy he was for that.
He just got in the booth.
Actually, Mario could be like the cousin Greg of the Nintendo world.
Damn, Mario's spitting.
It's a me.
It just never really made sense to me that he could spit fire underwater.
Well, it's a video game. It's a me. It just never really made sense to me that he could spit fire underwater. Well, it's a video game.
It's true.
That princess, she was always getting kidnapped.
Oh, here we go.
Victim blaming.
Yeah, why are you victim shaming Princess Peach right now?
It's really unfortunate for her.
Well, she's lucky she had a couple plumbers with some ingenuity.
What if you got straight up kidnapped and you were in a castle and you were just
gagged, tied to a chair?
Ooh, sounds fun.
Sign me up.
And then you don't know who's going to come rescue you
but suddenly your plumber just
comes through the door. Are you like, dude, what's up?
What's up, my guy? I was not expecting you.
I wasn't expecting you. I'm glad you're here.
My Italian plumber.
It's like, fuck. Thank you. I wasn't expecting you. I'm glad you're here. My Italian plumber. It's like, fuck.
Thank you.
And his dopey brother.
And his brother who's got all the hops in the world and maybe their little friend who's a mushroom.
You want to say his name?
Will?
Toadstool?
Toadstool.
Dude, it's Toadstool.
People have not forgotten.
Whatever.
I'm so good at that.
I'm so good at Super Mario World.
Super Mario Bros. 3, I can beat it in like an hour.
I'll go right through it.
Super Mario World was like the one game that I just played endlessly.
I can probably just do the exact same thing as you.
As a kid, you just get that muscle memory.
You just know exactly what you have to do.
You couldn't do it as well as I could.
I don't know why you're trying to make this into a thing.
You do this to Parks when he says something.
You're like, oh yeah, you're pretty good at that, Parks,
but I'm way fucking better.
Yeah.
Because I'm an adult and you're not.
Wait, are you as good at Mario as you are at Tony Hawk?
Because you actually were really good at Tony Hawk.
Thank you, David.
Thank you.
But I have serious doubts about your Mario abilities.
Super Mario World I'm very good at.
Very good.
Unpopular take, I think Mario 2 is my favorite.
I don't even know the difference between all those because I really only had Super Mario World.
Mario 2 is the worst one.
Significantly different game point.
Hey, don't even mess with it.
It stinks.
What's the one where he's got the raccoon tail on the cover?
Dude, that's three.
That's the one.
That one is goaded.
Nah.
Nah.
Let's not do this.
I want my son to be into these so bad.
Like, just the Mario world.
Just looking at that triggers feelings of just pure joy.
Like Christmas Eve night.
Even Christmas morning, Dylan.
Just joy.
Nostalgia.
I do agree with Dylan's take that Christmas night is more for the boys, your friends, than Christmas.
Christmas Eve, you're with the family the entire time.
You know why it's not for me?
Christmas, I always felt bad going anywhere on Christmas.
I get it.
I get it.
But you have to mob after 8 p.m., though.
I want to give you a chance to walk back your Super Mario Bros. 2 take as the best because it's really upsetting me.
Oh, that one I stand by.
Here's your chance.
Unfortunately, we're all riding different waves right now
because I'm definitely on Super Mario World.
It goes 3-1-2.
I don't play any of those.
I play Super Mario World, and that's all I care about.
I'm upset.
I didn't even like Mario 64 that much.
What about Mario 69?
I'd rather play Yoshi's Island.
Randy nodded, and Randy's the noted video game guy.
I don't know that one.
That means I'm right.
Yoshi's Island went hard.
Man.
You know, I never really got into the Yoshi games,
and I kind of feel bad about that.
Donkey Kong?
Diddy Kong, all that.
I fucked with Heavy.
Man, Mario was so tight.
Dude, shouts to him.
All I want is I need a room
that I can turn into a room for me
and just guys.
Like a man room.
Man cave.
And I want to just have
framed posters of Mario games
and stuff on the wall.
Is that too much to ask? I don't think it is.
I feel like there's a section of TikTok
that's just all man caves. And I feel like if's a section of TikTok that's just like all man caves,
and I feel like if we fell down that, we would just hate all of it.
I thought about doing that to my garage, and then I decided,
no, I should probably just use my garage as a storage unit.
Because I just don't have anywhere to put this other shit.
Just got too much fucking shit on me.
Man, we have a little storage issue at the new crib, as we do not have a garage.
It's a carport.
No storage.
It's a shame.
Oh, my brand new house doesn't have enough storage.
Shut up, dude.
I don't like mockingly childish Will over here.
I don't have enough storage in my my beautiful house hey by the way we opened up your your housewarming gift yeah did you because this
is the first i'm hearing of it i i dropped off i tried to stop by twice on moving day it was very
lovely thank you very much to you and the missus i guess my i'm still waiting on my housewarming
gifts from anybody in this room i'm still waiting for my invite to go over to your house.
You literally had one.
I had one, but you knew I was busy that day.
No, I didn't.
You knew I was busy.
You were busy going to Matt's El Rancho.
I stay busy, dog.
You went to dinner.
That's not busy.
We got an ornament from the DeFreezes.
That's sweet.
Well, you got two ornaments.
What?
You got two ornaments.
Dornaments.
Or you threw one out. There were two in there? There were two ornaments Or you threw one out
There were two in there?
There were two in there
You only got one?
Uh oh, this is a problem
You might need to go through some garbage
Because we had another ornament for you
Which one did you get?
It's a house that says our new home
Our first home or something
You're not going to like what you missed out on
Is it a glizzy?
Did I really throw one away?
I think you might have thrown one away, unfortunately.
Yeah, we got you two ornaments.
Both of them were pretty heartfelt.
Oh, crap.
Wasn't it like diamond encrusted or something?
I'm going to have to do some digging.
You want me to tell you what the other one was?
Today's trash day.
There's still time.
Not in my neighborhood.
Oh, well, this guy's on a different schedule.
They're different.
I have a different trash schedule.
When is your trash?
Tuesday?
Friday.
Friday's for trash.
I kind of like that.
Yeah.
You start the weekend free of trash.
But, like, Sunday night, you hear that.
I can hear my neighbors hauling the recycling out,
and I'm just like, oh, I don't want to do this.
I'm trying to watch Chris and Al.
Yeah.
That's a shame.
Well, the ornament you threw away so savagely was actually a Stella ornament.
Okay, I got to find one.
I really hope you do.
I can't believe that happened.
That's pretty bad.
I guess I just won't give you my gift.
Yeah, he'll just throw it directly in the trash.
I guess that saves me.
What's your problem?
What you could do is you guys could go in together on maybe some alcohol or something,
and then you just, instead of following along with the plan, you just go off on your own, go rogue.
You get some liquor.
It wasn't really even a plan.
It was just some conjecture.
It was 100% a plan.
It wasn't a plan.
I've got the receipts.
Probably.
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I want to hear about it.
Probably the same thing I did.
Pretty much existed solely on liquid IP.
I think, generously, maybe three or four.
I had one before the Christmas party, which we'll get to.
I had two the morning after the Christmas party, as I was feeling a little dusty.
And I kept drinking them all week.
I had one yesterday morning as well.
So maybe I'm in the four range as well.
I think I might have been higher.
Maybe even five or six, Dave.
You know, before the party, KJ, of Too Much Dip fame, friend of the show, hit me up.
He's like, I completely forgot liquid IV.
Can you please bring me some?
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Dylan, what did you get into this weekend?
Don't talk about the Christmas party.
I'm not going to, Will.
I will just say I went to the Christmas party on Friday.
I will not discuss the party yet.
All right?
Friday was also also moving day.
What'd you shoot?
You don't need to keep doing that stupid joke.
Bay and I moved into our new house,
and we're still in the thick of it.
We've been moving for three days straight,
and I'm exhausted.
I'm exhausted.
Sounds like you need some honks to help you.
Yeah, so I stopped by on Friday about noon. I went and got'm exhausted. I'm exhausted. Sounds like you need some honks to help you out. Yeah, so I stopped by on Friday about noon.
I went and got some lunch.
For those wondering, I did get a pesto pasta salad
as well as some curry chicken salad.
And I went to go stop by as I bought a couple cookies
for Lil' Bay and the homie.
That was going to be my gift at that moment.
Then you ate them.
And then as I was pulling up to it,
there was just a giant moving truck
and there were just college hunks
literally scattered about everywhere.
And I was like, I can't get in here,
so I guess I'm just going to go home.
And I ended up giving away one of the cookies
and I ate the other one.
Okay.
Well, we'll pass that along to the kids.
Yeah, let them know that I thought about them
and I got them two Santa cookies,
but I didn't end up giving them to them i have a question movie okay i'm going to start
by saying moving is the worst thing ever it is the worst thing ever dude we've all done it it
is the absolute worst there has to be a better way there isn't there has to be a better way
develop a portal i want to revolutionize the moving industry there's got to be a better way. Yeah, develop a portal. I want to revolutionize the moving industry.
There's got to be a better way.
What was our old mattress sponsor
that the mattress showed up in a box
and you just popped it open
and it just unfolded itself?
You just need that way
like all this stuff.
Inflatable furniture?
There's got to be a better way.
It is the worst.
It's just the worst.
I would argue that the worst part
about moving,
assuming you're lucky enough to to
have movers move the big stuff is clothing i hate i have a thing i hate hangers they bother me they
they're some of them just they're not what you're looking for the wires they get all like twisted up
i hate them i hate hanging clothes i hate trying to carry them once they're all stacked up um i've
tried different methods like the bed sheet, where you just throw them all
in there and then fold it up.
Oh, I've done that.
Yeah.
The worst thing for me is you feel like you've made progress.
You've started.
You've boxed up a bunch.
You feel good about the work you've done.
And then you're like, oh, I've got this closet.
What's in this closet?
You open it up, and it's just filled to the brim with shit.
You think clothes are the worst part?
I didn't say clothes.
I do.
Oh, I do.
Kitchen. Kitchen's the worst. It I didn't say clothes. I do. Kitchen.
Kitchen's the worst.
It's just...
Everything's breakable.
You don't realize how much shit you have until you have to get rid of all of it.
All of it.
It's the worst.
Why didn't you set your old house on fire and then just get the insurance money to go buy all new shit?
My back is toast right now.
A little fraud.
Tired.
My legs are jello.
This weekend sounds like a moving.
It stinks, man.
Yes, that was my weekend.
Sounds really fun.
All right, dude.
Super jealous.
It's electric.
I don't get it.
I don't get it.
There has to be a better way.
You literally hired hunks to come over and do it.
Does it get better than that?
All they do is move the boxes in the heavy fridge. Dude, that's all. They don't, well, don't even get me started. There has to be a better way. You literally hired hunks to come over and do it. Does it get better than that?
All they do is move the boxes in the heavy fridge. Dude, that's all.
They don't even get me started.
They don't do shit.
Like, you offer them wings and some beers and see if they want to stay over
and watch the UFC fight with you, and they're like, oh, I can't.
That's not how this works.
Let me tell you something.
I don't like it.
Aren't they all Logan Paul guys?
Yeah, dude.
They were all like, oh, no, we're going to Dirty Bills or something.
Yesterday I got to do something in front of Bay that I'm very, very good at,
and she finally got a little taste of it, a little glimpse.
You need to get to the point of the story here before people get too H on the TL.
It's not just TVs, but my ability to hang things.
I think I'm the goaded hanger in in austin what are you
you're using so many okay i'm the goaded hanger i can hang anything on the wall and she's very
so you're you're the best person at putting a nail into the wall and then putting something
oh this guy finds look at you you think that's all there is just putting a nail on the wall no
it's everything's the perfect height perfectly level perfectly level. We do prints next to each other
that are perfectly aligned.
You have prints?
Yeah. Prints.
Nice. I hung a
TV on the wall. Wires obviously
hidden and she was...
It's not hard to find a stud when you call
the hunks. If you thought she was
attracted to me before, you should have seen
that. I hope she finds that attractive if y'all are engaged. Yeah, you're engaged to be married. It would be big thought she was attracted to me before, you should have seen this. I hope she finds that attractive
if y'all are engaged.
Yeah, you're engaged
to be married.
It would be big
if she was attracted to you.
I'll hang whatever you want
on the wall.
You just gotta stop.
I'll hang Randy on the wall.
I don't think we should
hang Randy on the wall.
I don't know.
Randy, he doesn't deserve that.
I'll buy his neck.
What, are you gonna put like,
you're gonna put like,
like,
nails in his like,
rowback pullover right now?
Buy his britches.
Like how Joe Pesci put Kevin up on the little...
Exactly like that.
On the door.
And was going to bite his fingers off for some reason?
Yeah, well, just kill him.
What are you doing?
Quit delaying it.
There's an old man with a shovel behind you.
Yeah, what are you doing?
Anyway, I don't know if Bay's recovered from watching me hang that shit yeah
had to like have a cigarette out of the patio don't like i don't like your verbiage
dave you should have seen me yesterday man your shit's probably all crooked and i had it
professionally done is your shit crooked day really yeah is your shit crooked you could have
just had me do it my tv no remember i got like the the tile above the fireplace it was just i could
have but they had a special drill i don't know man god my shit it's y'all gotta y'all gotta go
see it i've seen i've just i've seen a lot of stuff that's wrong you'd be like oh my god you
guys hired a professional like no it's just dylan just the just the original d man i heard that
everything you hang is too high.
No.
Are you kidding? Not eye level.
Are you kidding?
I heard your TV is almost touching the ceiling.
Are you above a fireplace?
I heard you're going to have really bad cricks in your neck.
Okay.
That's good because, you know, there's a code that says it has to be a certain amount of inches above the fireplace.
Keep that in mind.
I'll show you a certain amount of inches.
The number one rookie mistake of hanging things is doing it too high.
Yeah. When people have their TV too high,
I'm like, what are you doing? TVs are supposed
to be so you can just sit there and look
straight ahead and see your television. You should check mine
out. It's the highest in the room. Really?
Does your television smoke
marijuana, David? My TV's... It's on the ceiling.
That's what I'm saying. I like to watch TV
on the ground on my back. Better my back and neck interesting i'm trying to find a flaw in this argument i don't
know if there is one thank you god i'll come see it dude what that boy get into this week and then
i just want a tv in my man cave um uh pretty much what dylan did minus the moving and hanging things on the wall
what did we do Thursday no one cares what you did Thursday man Thursday's stupid Friday was
Friday was good Saturday was tough man because you know Sammy's really mixing a lot of things
I won't get into what we had we'll talk talk about that later. But a lot of different types of beverages imbibed.
And it led to quite the Saturday that did require at least four liquid IV throughout the day.
From there, watched some football, watched the fights.
I watched zero football as YouTube TV did not have it on Saturday.
Oh, can I?
Thank you for bringing that up, Will.
I canceled YouTube TV Saturday and I became a Hulu subscriber.
Guess what I did today?
I canceled Hulu and I became a YouTube TV subscriber.
You knew it was going to be resolved quickly.
I didn't think this quickly.
I knew it was going to be resolved this quickly.
There's too many people out there clamoring, dude.
I can't even believe it. Anytime it it was going to be resolved this quickly. There's too many people out there clamoring, dude. I can't even believe it.
Anytime it actually gets to the point of removing the stations, I'm always shocked it got that far.
It's like real life succession shit.
Does Disney own Hulu?
Yes.
So the fix was in.
Fix was in.
That's pretty smart.
I like Hulu.
We have the lower Hulu one, not with the live TV.
We have the commercial free version. I like Hulu. We have the lower Hulu one, not with the live TV. We have the commercial free version.
Very happy with that.
It makes a big difference when you're watching The Bachelorette
as it's three hours long this Tuesday night.
Oh, my God.
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.
I'm out Wednesday.
No.
I'd be lying if I said that when ABC got taken away from YouTube TV.
The first thing I had wasn't even, oh, no, I'm going to watch bowl games,
stuff like that.
The first thing I thought of was, well,
maybe we don't have to watch the three-hour finale of The Bachelor.
We can just start Christmas early.
Three hours, man.
Then yesterday.
Yesterday I didn't have a drop of alcohol.
I had an early bird CBD.
I watched football.
I watched the Cowboys, Dallas football.
You're Dallas Cowboys.
You're Detroit Lions.
Dubs only.
We're eating dubs this season.
Can't stop.
It was a good weekend.
Texted with the boys.
Made some plans.
Can't wait.
Are you guys aware?
I'm about to blow your fucking minds right now are you aware that you're talking to the errand king
of Austin Texas
did not know that
no one ran better errands than me this weekend
no one
I bet I ran more inefficient errands than you
you might have
but I was the king of efficiency
I woke up Saturday morning feeling real bad after Sammy's,
and I thought to myself, you know what, Will?
There's no sense in feeling sorry for yourself.
It's time to get your ass off the couch, go to the grocery store,
and buy everything that your little heart desires.
I was buying everything in there.
You bought everything in the store.
Were you hungover?
That's expensive.
Yes, I was hungover, David.
Going to the store hungover is a dangerous proposition.
Oh, man.
Not only did I buy it, I bought every single ingredient that you needed
for a bomb-ass pot roast
that we made yesterday.
Your boy got, like,
a bunch of sweets
that just scream holiday season.
We were just going off.
Got a couple bottles of wine.
Sipped them.
Did it.
I even got some dumplings.
I did dumplings yesterday, too.
Shout out Tuk Tuk.
Sometimes you just gotta get a couple dumplings for the boys.
Steamed or fried?
Steamed.
Hey, Will.
What?
I ate at Monty's yesterday.
Terrible, dude.
It's not that bad.
It's one of the worst restaurants I've ever been to in my entire life.
There's one good thing on the menu.
I don't even know if there's, like, I think we're, like, it's the worst Tex-Mex in Texas.
That's really inaccurate, first of all.
Second of all, pretty good frozen house, Mark.
It's fine.
It's fine.
One of the more odd patio sitches in the world.
Terrible.
Not a great patio.
Yeah, don't need to look when there's cars parking, like, two feet from your table.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
I made every meal this weekend.
Your boy was just in there just going crazy. I made every meal this weekend. Your boy was just in there just going crazy.
I made zero meals this weekend.
Just made a beautiful pasta dish Saturday night because everyone knows that after a night of Italian food,
you have to follow it up with mediocre Italian food that you make at your home.
And then, yeah, the pot roast.
Dave, can we have pot roast hour real quick?
Yeah, please do.
26 minutes, Dylan.
Write this down.
It's the pot roast time. Oh, yeah, for sure. Oh, this is me writing. You don't even pick up the pen. How many pounds is your pot roast hour real quick? Yeah, please do. 26 minutes, Dylan. Write this down. It's the pot roast time.
Oh, yeah, for sure.
This is me writing.
You don't even pick up the pen.
How many pounds was your pot roast, dude?
You're talking about pot roast.
How many pounds was it?
Can I tell you a little something?
I did nothing.
It was all my wife.
Sally did most of it, too.
And I couldn't tell you, but I can tell you, mega leftovers.
We have so much.
I'm eating pot roast for the next two days.
We had a three and a half pound boy.
I got some of the multicolored carrots because you know I'm an absolute savage when it comes to carrots.
We had the purple ones in there, the white ones, orange ones, classics.
I'm an absolute savage when it comes to carrots is what this guy just said.
I didn't know there were different colored carrots.
I truly did not know. Wow, dude. You don't know there were different color carrots. I truly did not know.
Wow, dude.
You don't know anything about carrots.
No, I know.
It's my least favorite vegetable, baby.
They stink.
Dude, are you kidding?
No, okay.
Carrots raw might stink, but carrots when they've been in the pot roast.
They have to be mush.
Oh, I actually prefer them raw.
I hate you.
Cooked carrots are disgusting.
Dude, the carrot is just the glizzy of the vegetable world.
Have you ever had a roasted carrot that has a little drizzle on it?
Much more than a steam sit.
I'll have you over sometime for some roasted carrots.
You know I roast my carrots hard.
All right.
I just put them on the counter.
I just go like this to them.
He just points his hand at them.
Actually, I'm going to do a TikTok.
I'm going to start roasting stuff, and I'm just going to make a TikTok that's just me roasting food.
That's not a bad idea.
It's not a bad idea.
I would follow that.
And then suddenly it just becomes my recipe right after I roast it.
Actually, that has legs.
I like that.
Fuck.
I need to stop picking at my nails.
You should just paint your nails the Washed Media logo, like the young lady on Twitter.
Dude, shouts to Yoko. She went the fuck
off on Twitter today. She snapped. It's true.
She went crazy with them.
I don't know how she got that much detail
under those little tiny nails of hers.
Yoko underscore six.
She did it to them.
It's amazing detail. The level of detail.
Can we just
skip to the... Let's just talk about the damn party.
Where's the big game?
Get big game in here while I talk about our friends over at Headspace.
Are your thoughts running in endless circles in your mind, Dylan?
Sometimes, yeah.
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Oh, I'd be meditating.
We'd be meditating even before the Headspace was a sponsor.
That is the honest truth.
Ground floor Headspace, guys.
Used Headspace before they were a sponsor.
I was a beginner.
Didn't know how to do it.
Logged into Headspace.
Walked me right through it. Very,
very helpful and effective. A lot of people don't
realize that you don't need to meditate for 15 minutes
at a time. Sometimes all you need is just like a
little quick one. A little quick boy.
A couple minutes. A little SOS
one that they have. A little quick boy.
A little quick boy. It's like Mario
just running around.
Just like Mario. Our thoughts
can be confusing enough and meditation doesn't have to be.
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I just mentioned their SOS mini meditations
for a quick breather.
They relieve stress.
They just bring you a little moment of peace
in this chaotic world.
Well, I can use it right now.
If you want to take the rest of the time off
and just meditate, that works for us.
You should have the hunks over to do a group meditation.
That's not necessary.
You could, though, if you wanted to.
Yeah, probably.
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It's time.
Christmas party recap.
We got Magic Bullet in the building.
He's even wearing a Cabernet colored shirt today.
Hello.
I've been into the cab colored things, I guess.
Red's sort of a good color on me, I think.
And then this kind of earthens it down a bit.
Earthens it down.
Are you doing something different with your hair?
I don't have a product, so I'm trying to like...
I ran out of the product I normally use.
It'd be a good stocking stuffer.
So it's just kind of...
Did you run out of it before the Christmas dinner the other night?
No, I just tried something new
Okay
Went down with the hair a little bit
Okay
He really did
You really did it to him
Did you know I was taking a photo of you when I took the photo of you?
I did
I think the camera gave it away
How out of all the commotion going on 11.30pm took the photo of you? I did. Because I looked at it. I think the camera gave it away.
How out of all the commotion going on at 11.30 p.m. in a restaurant
that just served us way too much, how did you know
that my camera was just going to be sitting right there?
I think because I saw you
like, we can
get into this.
My spot was
solid at the table, but we were very
it was a two-sides operation.
We were very much in our own corner over there, me, KJ, Randy, Maytown.
Factions.
And you guys had your own –
Well, I was in my own corner over there.
Yeah.
No, but –
I had to talk to Dylan and my wife the entire time.
It was terrible.
Yeah.
At one point I looked down.
I was like, hey, nice to see you guys.
You know what happened?
The problem was the middles weren't pulling their weight.
Oh, were the middles not pulling their weight, Dave?
You were a middle.
Maybe not, but I feel like I was a nice bridge.
I think I interacted with Brett quite a bit.
No, it was me and Dave.
A lot of people were talking about it.
It was the Dave and Brett show in the middle.
It was the Dave and Brett show, and I kind of contribute to my side with Randy and Adam and Caroline,
but it was too loud to get to the other side.
It was a table and an environment not set up for conversing.
Also, love everything about it.
Could have had a little bit more lighting.
It was dark.
Oh, I like it dark.
I don't like not being able to see all of the food.
I like to kind of see what I'm getting into.
He likes to see the food.
It's very good food.
You like seafood?
I don't want to just stare at it.
I want to eat it.
Am I weird and say,
I think the mozzarella sticks,
they went the hardest?
No, we already talked about that.
Oh, did you?
The mozzarella sticks were hands down
the best part of the entire meal.
It was wonderful.
I think I'm anti-prefix going forward.
Can you spell prefix?
P-R-I-X-F-I-X-E.
There you go.
Brett knows.
I didn't get to try the pork chop.
Neither did I.
I can't really.
You didn't either.
Who ate all the pork chop if none of us got to eat the pork chop?
I don't know.
Dylan, did you eat the entire pork chop?
Dude, I ate plenty of pork chop, but there's also this much left at the end of the night on our plate.
You take it home?
There were some people, I'm not going to name names,
there were some people who didn't really understand the process of family-style passing.
No, no, no.
And so if something went down there and we didn't know about it at our end,
because A, it's pitch black in the room, and B, it's a very loud restaurant,
then there was a lot of stuff missed out on because some people just didn't pass it.
There were identical dishes on both sides of the table.
I don't know.
There were.
Well, we were in the middle.
We were the middle boys.
We were middle boys.
We were just mixing it up, talking shop.
Not pulling away.
We did.
The middles.
But we did pass every dish that we got.
I can tell you that.
I'll tell you this.
We had plenty of wine.
Plenty of wine.
Whose fault was that?
Dude, the waitress looked at me and she thought, you know what?
This guy's a sucker.
I'm going to squeeze every last dollar out of this idiot.
And she did.
I don't know what happened, but for some reason she kept on defaulting to me,
and I did not want to deal with it.
It's because you were at the head of the table.
I know.
I like sitting at the head of the table so I can look at everybody the entire time.
So was Randy, though.
There's a big responsibility.
Yeah, and she ensured that I –
We really got more lights.
She made sure that I had that responsibility squarely in my lap,
and all I did was just nod my head like, sure, that works.
I enabled you, though, because at one point you were like,
should we get another bottle?
And it was like we did not need another bottle.
You got another Magnum, but you asked me about it first. You said, should we do it? I was like, yeah, fuck it. Yeah. I actually remembered that the next day. I was
feeling really bad about myself because after dinner was all served, we'd done eating. She was
like, all right, another bottle of wine for the table. And I was like, yeah, okay, sure. And Dylan
gave me clearance on that. And then when she, before she brought the check, she rolled up and
she goes, all right, just the check and a round of espresso martinis?
I was like, yeah, sure.
No, this is what she said.
No, someone asked for an espresso martini.
I think it may have been you.
And she goes, well, I was actually just going to ask if everybody wanted one.
She was quite the salesperson.
She crushed it.
She did.
She knew what she was doing.
That is not her line of my highlight.
I'll put it this way. That's not
her first rodeo. And then someone said, does anybody
not want an espresso martini? Who's going to say
yes to that question? We all got one.
Did you have one, Randy? Oh, he got a limoncello
instead. You really did?
Randy's a limoncello boy.
Did you like it? Randy was
like a walking meme on Friday night. Better than
your creamsicle?
A creamsicle at the pregame. He did all the colors of the wind on Friday. Yeah,. Better than your creamsicle? A creamsicle at the
pregame. He did all the colors of the wind on
Friday. Yeah, no one's ordering creamsicles
at the bar beforehand.
Orange creamsicle, yellow limoncello.
Do you have any absinthe?
Green goblin? Green fairy?
Did you pregame with hypnotic?
Gone off that hypno?
Isn't he a rapper?
I've never had hypnotic before.
It's blue.
Think about it.
I've only had UV blue.
You know what I was drinking?
Hideous liquor.
Stop.
No one gets that.
I'm sorry.
That was a thing, though.
We were just doing H-bombs.
Any highlights?
Who won the Fit of the Night Award?
I hate to give him credit. but I think it was Randy.
I think Randy did.
I think he put it together in a day.
Yeah, Randy went pretty hard.
Definitely wasn't me.
It wasn't me.
We were all before.
Not to brag, but one of the Dude Perfect guys, Chad, hashtag Chad, was like, dude, I can't
wait to see the fits.
And we're all like, nah.
Dude.
Kind of melded in this year.
Had the Christmas party been on Saturday night instead of Friday, we would have been volume see the fits and we're all like nah dude kind of kind of melded in this year had the christmas
party been on saturday night instead of friday we would have been volume shooting just dope fits
because it was cold enough but because it was 80 degrees i was like i can't i can't do too much
we were very limited what if it's warm in the restaurant and then i'm sitting there in a cashmere
sweater just sweating my little dick off i still i did go for it i think dave and i both said screw
it we're just going to sweat.
At Rustic Tappan, I certainly did.
That's where we did the pre-drinks.
Yeah, so I pulled a Will from 2020, if you remember,
how he was liquored up walking into the building.
Oh, yeah.
I got to Grove Wine Bar at 6 that night.
That's very early.
Our reservation wasn't until 9.
That's correct.
Yeah, three hours of drinking beforehand is probably not the move.
To be young.
So we were tired after Sammy's, and we just went home.
There's no shame in that, Brett.
We didn't go to Don's. We didn't go to wherever the party people went to.
When you don't leave the restaurant until after 1130, you're allowed to just go home.
Yeah.
I thought you went with those guys, the young guys.
No, no, no.
I would have definitely gone to Don's over wherever they went.
Emo's?
Empire.
Empire.
Yeah.
Apparently they went to Emo night.
Yes.
And word on the street is that intern A-bomb, Cool Adam, did a little crowd surfing.
What bars are just people crowd surfing?
Emo Night, dude.
Okay.
I don't want to speak for the guy, but he looked like he had a blast at dinner.
He was going at it.
He might have been my MVP.
He was chopping it, too.
That's part of the reason I didn't even speak to you guys besides Dave was Adam was chopping.
Dude, Adam was on one.
At one point he goes, I heard him say, I don't even like red wine.
And then he takes his glass that was like half full and just pounds it.
At one point I looked down the table because, as you know, I forced myself into sitting at the head of the table.
And I looked down and I see Adam.
And Adam just absolutely grabbed his glass and drank an entire glass of wine and just one chug.
I was like, yep, he's just letting it rip right now.
It's pretty good wine, Adam.
Yeah.
It's not really a chugging scenario.
Yeah, that's why he was chugging it.
He's like, this shit's good.
It was his first to attend, but the fact that KJ just had those just big, muscular, veiny arms out for all the world to see.
It was disgusting.
I was like, what are you trying to do?
I could feel the gravity next to me.
My wife was there. They had their own orbit.
I was like, dude, KJ, stop.
Also, a guy I was chopping up with.
I don't think I spoke to Will the whole night.
Nah.
I barely talked to Will.
I don't think I said words to you guys.
Will, you really helped me out.
I was trying to get a joke in,
and everybody kept talking,
and I sat on it for about 30 seconds,
and Will saw me waiting to get it in.
He goes, hey, hang on, hang on.
And then I issued the joke,
and Will liked it,
and then everybody else just went back to talking.
I said, thanks, man.
What was the joke, man?
I missed it.
I couldn't tell you.
Maybe I caught it.
I just didn't think it was funny.
Look, it wasn't like an A-level joke.
C-plus.
I had a blast.
It was fun, man.
I think I'm still foggy from it.
I'm not in game mode.
I'm excited for this little vacay, this little Christmas break we're taking next week,
so I can really reset the old batteries here.
What kind of wine were we drinking?
If you don't mind me asking.
No fucking clue.
Oh, it was just like...
She was showing me Magnum bottles on the wine list,
and I was pointing toward the cheapest one.
Barulo?
Is that the word?
Yes, it was, because I kept on saying, Jason Barulo.
Yeah.
That's pretty good.
Barulo.
See, that's a joke I would have loved to have heard.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I should have been like, can you say that one more time a little louder?
Anytime I get the opportunity to do some Jason Barulo content, I usually take that opportunity.
It was a decent bottle of wine, but it was not the $4,000 one she tried to sell us on at one point.
Fort Grant, huh?
Yeah, she pointed out some very expensive ones,
and I was like, oh, yeah, we're not doing that well.
We're doing fine.
We're here, but we're not doing well enough
to get a $4,000 bottle of wine.
Did we do shots?
No.
We just did espresso martinis.
Yeah, we were just chugging martinis like they were going to stop.
Martinis and wine.
Oh, and Adam got a Peroni that he proclaimed was the best beer you'd ever had.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, he went around the table to say, yes, this is the best beer I've ever tasted.
Espresso martinis are just shots for people 34 and up.
Yeah, it's a quick way to get some energy and get drunk real quick without having to
actually go through the process of ordering a shot.
Ordering a Red Bull vodka.
Yeah. Yeah. I was going to ask if everybody wanted one. Oh, my God. Yeah, of ordering a shot. Ordering a Red Bull vodka.
I was going to ask if everybody wanted one.
Oh my god. Yeah, of course we do.
Of course we do. She better give me a good handshake next time
I walk into that restaurant after what we did with her.
She knew that we were just
willing to say whatever. Like, yeah,
bring it to the table. Let's have some fun.
She knew we were suckers. Were you guys down bad on Saturday?
Yes!
I was down real bad.
I felt fine.
I've been worse.
I wasn't good, but I wasn't deathbed.
I think it really has a lot to do with sticking to a similar beverage.
Well, luckily we didn't do that at all.
All I did was red wine and espresso martini.
That's the only thing I did that night.
I think that's okay.
Because I was at Topgolf by 2 on Saturday.
Man, that's Dylan's favorite place.
I will not be doing their food again at Topgolf.
Are you a bigger fan of the Top or the Golf?
It's like you've done that.
What are you doing?
Fuck Topgolf.
Was Trey Kennedy there?
Be honest.
No, there was a couple of bachelor parties, though.
They were having a good time in the bays across from us.
Did you get any OMBs?
No, I didn't.
I didn't.
I got the nice man who would like to talk high school football.
Gave us swing tips, though, for like 45 minutes.
Oh, that's cool.
And we didn't have the balls to be like, hey, can we just enjoy our round here?
I noticed you brought your own gloves.
Yeah, and a glove.
And my golf shoes.
Did you bring a range finder?
No, I did not bring a range finder.
No, the guy next to us, he brought his own gloves
and he was pulling them out.
I mean, like, hey, hey, try this.
How old was he?
Try this.
Probably 60, 65. All all right that's kind of cute
though it was i and we we indulged him and we're like oh yeah yeah like my grip you have like three
knuckles on top okay okay dave i could see uh what if my dad ever went to top golf he would
bring his own clubs i brought my own clubs the first time I went. I didn't know what I was getting into.
A lot of people did.
Pretty embarrassed, honestly.
Wore a glove, did everything.
Did you bring your bag or just a couple of...
No.
Brought my golf bag, Dylan.
I walked in there and set it down.
I was just like...
And it was very crowded, so it was in the way.
It's just like, oh, what are you doing?
I did the same thing.
I was in the league, though.
I felt like because I was in the league, I had to bring my own clubs.
That's a little different.
You get a pass for that.
No, I should not get a pass for that.
If anything, I should be sculpted even further for joining a golf league at Topgolf.
Yeah, that's pretty lame.
That's the most unexpected thing you've done since you've lived here.
It sounded fun, and then I went to one, and I was like, uh, why don't I?
Who was the team?
You, Jack Hammer.
It was me, Harrison, J-Bone.
And...
No.
And an old roommate of one of them.
I don't know.
I thought J-Ham was part of the team.
We should have won the league.
But we just...
I don't even want to get into it.
Fuck Topgolf.
Hate all of them.
Somebody forgot their clubs one day
and had to use the...
We got cheated out
because their system broke.
We almost won the entire league,
and then one of our shots didn't count
because it didn't register it,
and then one of the guys said
that he didn't see our shot go in.
You're saying there was a system of a down?
Maybe.
Wake up!
Wake up!
Paid $30 for six wings and nine nachos.
Yeah.
You can never have nine nachos.
I'm pretty much out forever on that.
Not that they were bad.
It's outrageously expensive.
It was like, oh, that's insane.
What was on each chip?
Cheese, jalapenos, pico, and chicken.
Okay. But, like, there were were dave when i say nine there were nine corn chips on the plate were they stacked or were they separated they were individualized
see i i that's not how i fuck with nachos i need i like them all together because you like to pick
up one and they all come up yeah you never know what what you're gonna get you pick one up and
it's a droopy boy or you pick one up and it's a solid boy.
Shouts to the droopy boys, though.
It was served on a pewter stone
with a smear of sour cream
like they're trying to be fucking Nobu.
I've seen his movies.
I'm like, this is Topgolf, guys.
You're better off just loading the thing up
with Tostitos and Kraft shredded
and calling it a day for $4.
That's the bread special.
Brad would rather be at home eating just Tostitos.
I would.
Pace salsa.
Compared to that.
New York City.
I would.
I totally would.
The winds were fine, cold, and hot.
Too hot for me.
Should we do our Christmas party next year at Topgolf?
No.
My eyes are already on next year's Christmas party.
We're not doing a dark Italian restaurant again.
Well, we're going to mix it up.
Yeah.
We could go for the tri-annual Merriman Christmas cocktail. Can I? doing a dark Italian restaurant again. Well, we're going to mix it up. We could go for the tri-annual
Merriman Christmas cocktail.
We should just do car. If it's right by
your place. Can I do next year's?
Can I plan next year's? Sure.
Give me the rock. I'm going to start planning
today. I just passed him the rock.
I got it. Hey, how was Don's?
Let me do a bounce back. I didn't go. I went home.
Don's is cool. It's a new scene.
Not like it's a new bar, but it's bad.
Very crowded.
Well, the thing is, I think Instagram has made it a thing.
Really?
Yeah.
It's very much...
That's cool to go...
It's like Deep Eddie, right?
It seems like it's the Deep Eddie crowd has transitioned to Don's.
It's like a younger Deep Eddie crowd.
Yeah.
Especially during Christmas.
Which is weird.
Did you guys have to pay the physical dollars in order to get in?
They actually make you pay physical money for a cover.
Was there a cover church?
I paid in Ether.
Ethereum.
Ether.
I just hit them with some cummies.
I hit them with a Sapphire diss track.
Yeah, you just put the Nas song on and just played it for them until they let you in?
I got you, Doug.
Thanks, Brett.
They shooting.
Hold on, what was that? I paid in until they let you in. I got you, Doug. Thanks, Brett. They shooting. Hold on. What was that?
I paid in commies to get in.
Really? Oh, well, you paid for me then
because I didn't pay anything. I didn't either.
Who paid? Did Bay pay?
I don't think there was a cover.
Bay probably got in free. Saturday night, the week before
Christmas? There's like a $20
cover in July there. Then I guess
there was. Someone paid for me.
Your future wife
puts out the vibe
of somebody who can get us
into Don's Depot
without a cover.
She knows Don.
Yeah.
She knows the door guy
or at least Don himself.
She knows an obnoxious
amount of people.
Was he tickling the ivory
by any chance?
I couldn't point Don out,
but there were
a handful of older gentlemen,
significantly older,
that were. And I assume he was one of them. If you touch him on older gentlemen, significantly older, that were, and I assume
he was one of them. If you touch him on the sticks,
cherish that moment. We don't know
how many Don has left.
Mostly because he's
pushing a hundo. On the sticks?
The piano? Yeah, thanks, Brett. I'll remember
that next time I'm there.
Seriously? Yeah, he does like once a month.
Okay. There was a scene in there.
It was fun. It was fun.
It was fun.
Saw a couple of listeners.
I was too drunk to be in there, but it was fun.
We found ourselves a nice little table and just parked it.
That's the move.
Yep.
That's the move.
How'd KJ do?
I mean, other than his just voluminous arms.
Yeah.
He's got to get rid of those.
He was great.
Would it be weird if he got his arms lipoed just to make him smaller?
Lipoed.
Just get his muscles shaved away?
Isn't that what you did?
Yeah.
Look at these things, dude.
They're tiny.
We literally got arm removal surgery.
They're tiny.
You and Jared.
Yeah, Jared and I.
We have the same arm people.
Jared got all of it sucked out of his bicep and put into his ass.
Yeah.
Jared does have a thick, juicy ass.
Randy liked that one.
Yeah.
If there's one thing Randy likes, it's Jared's thick, juicy ass content.
When did Drew and Lily stop by?
Yeah.
That was an interesting, like, four seconds.
People knew.
Yeah.
People knew we were mobbing over there.
Our waiter was not at all annoyed by their presence there.
Yeah, that she.
They held up traffic for like
a solid three minutes and they're like,
we have to get around here.
They're very serious about that room and
the amount of people that can be in that room.
Because there's a wine, the wine
rack is right behind you.
They're pulling it from behind you.
I always felt like I had my back to it.
I needed the power seat looking out. And yeah i was just kind of well dylan kept on putting bottles of wine from
the rack behind us into britney's purse i thought those were free and i was like dylan stop dude
those are very expensive and nice bottles of wine you can't just stick them in her purse are you
mocking my olive garden from high school story no i don't even know what you're talking about
my high school girlfriend did that.
She stole a bottle of wine from Olive Garden.
You were dating certified baddies back then. We didn't.
Is this the Sonic girl?
It is.
Wow.
What's she up to these days?
I don't know.
I think she's got a family.
Oh, good.
But yeah, let me, she took the bottle of wine allegedly.
Allegedly.
I don't know.
And then we drank it.
And then.
You're an accomplice.
Might have gotten...
The park we were drinking at might have had
an officer stop by and say, what's going on here?
Like, oh.
You guys are sucking face and drinking red wine.
Mainly the latter.
I don't know
the former versus the latter. It's hard.
It's pretty easy.
He let us off.
Ew.
Nice.
Which was nice of him.
He was a honk.
Ever since that day, I can honestly say I've been backed by the blue.
Was he wearing?
I backed the blue.
I'm sorry.
Was he wearing tearaway pants?
Is he a stripper
oh man let's talk about cuts clothing real quick guys work attire has changed you don't have to
wear stuffy uncomfortable clothes anymore and cuts has reimagined work clothes by elevating
the classic t-shirt to something you can wear on any occasion from a formal business meeting to a
casual night out everyone loves loves Cuts clothing.
Everyone.
Elite athletes, entrepreneurs, recording artists.
They're all wearing what GQ calls the only t-shirt worth wearing.
So why waste time wondering what to wear to your holiday events?
Cuts has you covered so you can look your best this season and every season after.
They've got so much stuff out here, Dylan.
They got their t-shirts.
You think I don't know that?
I think you know that. They're made out of pika. You familiar with pika? That's what everybody calls me, Dylan. They got their t-shirts. You think I don't know that? I think you know that.
They're made out of pika.
You familiar with pika?
That's why everybody
calls me Pikachu.
I'm wearing their polos
like crazy.
It's a pro tri-blend tee.
It's a tee that's
blended three times.
Yeah, that's the thing
about a tri-blend.
Three blends.
Think about that.
Everything they have
is minimalist design
that's professional enough
to go to the office
yet comfortable enough
for a night out.
And it combines the versatility with style so you have the perfect look for every occasion.
And these guys don't just...
It's not just a t-shirt company.
A lot of people might think that.
It's not.
I just mentioned the polo.
I'm riding polo.
Why did I know you were going to go there?
Because I'm on my derulo.
You're not.
Dude, all of it's good looking.
It's clean, minimalist design.
And that's what I like about it.
They're not trying to do too much.
These are just classic staples for every person's wardrobe.
They have joggers and bomber jackets?
Yeah, Dylan.
And they're both fresh.
I need a...
I'm pretty shy when it comes to wearing bomber jackets.
But if there's one bomber jacket that I'm willing to maybe flex for,
I think it might be cuts because they just do it right.
But like Dylan said, they also do joggers and more.
So, you know, it's easy to decide what to wear year-round.
It's one less thing to think about.
Cuts has your holiday shopping covered in a ton of new products
and special site-exclusive offers every day in December,
plus 15% off site-wide at cutsclothing.com.
That's C-U-T-S, clothing.com.
You get 15% off, plus their can't-miss daily deals.
Well said.
I don't know what this next segment is.
Yeah, I made a mistake.
I made a mistake on the runny.
This is my second mistake in as many weeks.
What did you do?
I must have copy and pasted the name of a soccer player
that I was trying to get a scouting report on
instead of actually just writing down what we were supposed to be doing.
So we're not talking about Bubakar Kamara?
No.
But he's a good defensive midfielder if you're wondering about that scouting report.
He might be going to Manchester soon.
I'll check it out.
Let's holler at that lady in the pediatric ICU who's just absolutely stunting on her
sick child.
What's wrong with this woman?
I don't even want to give out.
I don't even want to give out her at
because I'm worried that she's just going to get bullied
off the face of the earth.
But a nice young lady.
She's a young lady.
A young lady posted a TikTok from a hospital bed
where you can see her child lying there.
He or she has their eyes open.
They've got some breathing tubes hooked up.
It's by all means a sad situation, which is why people are sending prayers to her.
Unfortunately, she did something that no one should be doing in this scenario.
And when someone asked what happened, instead of just saying what happened on TikTok,
which she doesn't really even need to do in the first place, she decided to do a dance to explain what happened.
So you've seen the never give up kid who's like in front of his grandpa.
Who's like, yeah, on his deathbed seemingly.
And he does the never give up.
And he's doing like the hand things.
And he's serious.
And it's very cringy.
This is, I think thisingy. This is...
I think this is worse.
This is in the ballpark, and if you wanted to say it's worse, I wouldn't argue with you.
It's worse from, like, this is a messed up perspective, but the kids with his grandpa was more of just, like, cringeworthy.
Okay, devil's advocate.
The baby also has RSV, which that's something you fear your baby getting.
You don't want it to get at any point.
And like TikTok is bad.
Okay.
The reason I think that the kids,
the other kid that his video is more acceptable is because he's clearly
younger.
So he's,
he's,
he's dumber is what I'm saying.
He doesn't know what the right thing to do is to it's better because he just kind of crushes it.
To be fair, he did kill that kid.
He kind of went off during it.
And this girl dancing and trying to do her moves,
she just doesn't accomplish what he did.
She's a mother.
She should know better.
You should know that when you're in the ICU with your child,
maybe don't be doing, like, generic TikTok moves.
But she does say that he tested positive for RSV while doing her dance.
And she has since deleted the video.
That was probably the move.
No, the move was probably just never posting it.
Right, but the internet doesn't forget.
TikTok, there's a time and place.
I would just say that there's never an occasion for a hospital tiktok
unless you're unless you're an employee of the hospital and you guys are doing this for like a
fundraiser or it's like i don't want my i don't want my my like my doctors and nurses doing tiktoks
i don't know there's some there are some um heartwarming moments in hospitals you know
someone getting walking for the first time after an accident, maybe.
Like, you know, bust a camera out.
Put it on Facebook.
Maybe the rule should be if you're going to TikTok from a hospital,
just don't dance in the TikTok.
Yeah, that should be a no dance zone, a hospital.
That's a sad place.
Wait a minute.
I think I agree with this.
No dancing in hospitals.
Blanket.
Blanket rule for all of them.
I just...
I don't know.
Call me crazy.
But when something devastating happens to somebody I know,
and I'm in the hospital, and I'm trying to sort that out,
my first inclination is not to bust out my phone
and think about the TikToks that I can get off doing it.
And set it to a catchy song.
Can I make y'all a promise?
Yeah.
If either of y'all are ever hospitalized,
I will show up in a nurse's outfit with Joker makeup.
You promise?
I will.
Dave, if I'm ever hooked up to breathing tubes in the hospital,
please just make sure that you get a dope TikTok out of it.
I'm going to absolutely hit a whoa over your over your your uh unconscious body thank you
somebody else sent something to the group text of like a funeral like an open casket funeral and
then some young lady just with just a minute and a half long twerk session on the on the on the deceased
deceased face which okay i i get it oh you found it yeah i get it i mean she's she's definitely
just grinding on this dude's open casket it's an interesting move but i don't know if did you
guys see the the viral tiktok recently of the nice young lady at her own wedding.
Mm-hmm.
Throwing that ass in a circle in the groove. I did see that.
Oh, yeah.
You know, I wouldn't want that at my wedding, personally.
But if I attended a wedding where that happened, I think that I would enjoy it.
I didn't watch it.
Was she in a thong or something?
Was that the deal?
She had a very small dress on.
Okay.
She pulled it off.
Good for them.
She pulled it off.
Scantily clad.
I bet you they consummated.
Probably.
I think they probably did that before.
Consummation.
Based on their energy.
I just feel like they definitely did some stuff
before they got married.
Right.
They were just vibing.
Right.
You don't think he just edged the entire courting period?
You just want to...
You just love talking edge, man.
He must be your favorite from U2.
He's my favorite wrestler.
Not familiar.
Okay.
Sorry.
I'll withhold all wrestling talk going forward.
People are saying that boxing's turning into WWE with how things are going.
I mean, totally rigged fight.
Total job.
If you go on TikTok, everyone's saying it's rigged, man.
I mean...
You talking Jake Paul?
Yeah.
Should have been Tommy Fury beating the piss out of him.
I mean, because he really did hit him with a right hook flush.
And it sure looked like he was out when he face planted into the ground and laid there unconscious.
Oh, he was out.
So unless the rig part is like he said, I'm going to let you do this,
which I don't see why you would do that.
Quick payday.
It was not rigged.
Quick payday.
He was already getting paid, though.
I mean, I don't know.
I need him to take on a real opponent.
Yeah.
Don't resonate you're undefeated when you haven't fought anybody.
You beat one guy twice.
You did, but that was impressive.
Who's bigger at this point, Jake or Logan?
I honestly don't know.
I don't know the difference between them.
The one who just fought, Jake.
Jake is bigger than Logan?
Yeah, I think so.
Are you talking size-wise or popularity?
Popularity.
I don't know.
Do you know Randy?
Randy's really, he's trying to work this out in his head right now.
He says, media Logan, boxing Jake.
Yeah, I mean, Logan's not boxing, is he?
Logan survived that...
Probably poor choice of wording there.
The suicide forest fiasco.
He just...
He needed to take a couple reps off after that.
Oh, that was...
Was that Logan?
Yeah.
That was Logan.
That was stupid. Very stupid. That was Logan. That was stupid.
Very stupid.
That dude's jacked.
He's huge.
Jake is absolutely jacked.
But they have to be on something, right?
Logan's bigger than Jake?
Oh, my gosh.
No, no, no, no.
The one who fought the other night's bigger than...
Dave, Logan is a monster.
Bigger than Jake?
Dude, he's much more built.
Oh, wow.
Oh, he is taller.
Yeah.
I think I like Logan Paul more, and I don't know why.
I hate them both, really.
I think Jake's the better fighter.
The fact that we're even having to talk about this is bumming me out.
I hate these fucking two.
I didn't know we were going to talk about it.
I didn't either.
Had Tommy Fury been in this fight, I would have bought it and been underwhelmed when Jake –
or Logan Paul eventually beat Tommy Fury and ruined my wife's dreams.
These dudes.
I hate them both.
I did watch this fight, by the way.
You bought it?
I did not.
You watched it on crackstreams.com?
No, I would never do that.
I watched it at a place where it was on or something.
My living room.
Let's talk about our friends over at Relief Band.
Maybe just don't TikTok that.
That's a great segment title.
Sorry.
Yeah, that's what I said.
Thinking out loud here.
We all received some Relief Bands.
This was something I didn't even know existed.
I'm a nauseous boy.
Yeah, you got a little Tom Tom issue.
Dylan always makes comments about how my tummy always goes.
You have a weak tummy.
He's a nauseous boy.
Thank you.
Thank you.
It's a bummer for me.
I'm not even like a hungover nauseous person.
I just have tummy issues all the time. And relief band could not have come into my life at a better time.
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How'd it go for you?
It was a combination of being hungover and having pre-flight anxiety.
And Cajun food.
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And it was very helpful.
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It was.
I didn't bring mine and I wish I would have as I had a pig's head for dinner the night before and was not feeling the best.
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What's up?
To be clear, you said B-A-N-D and not Bendy.
True.
True.
Thank you for clarifying that.
Whatever you do, just don't do it.
That guy was so Bendy it give him credit for being
as bendy as he is i cannot express enough to i cannot express enough to people mainly people
in the discord do not find this tweet and do not look at this tweet find the tweet nope
it's not that bad oh yeah it is it's not i mean it's not like it's not that bad. Yeah, it is. It's not like egregiously graphic or anything.
It's not.
Did you look at the same tweet?
No, I mean, it's graphic, but he's not in there.
It's not something you would pull up in an office space.
Surely not.
It's not safe for work.
Definitely don't pull it up when you're with the family or the boys on Christmas Eve.
Maybe if you're with the boys or the girls.
Sure. Ask them
if they're ready to have their minds blown. Or just wait till
Christmas night when you're really going to see your friends.
Just close out of the tab before you go to
Christmas dinner. Who found that? Was that KJ?
Dylan. I retweeted him.
Chill out. You're giving
too many people an in.
I un-retweeted, so you can't find it. It's an un-retweeted so you can't find it
It's an un-retweet
He un-RT'd
Yeah
Coming into the studio today
When I arrived
Something happened to me that's not happened in this studio
Maybe since we got here
I got a parking spot in the front row
On a Monday morning
Man when I turned in
I saw your vehicle there,
and I was like, we got here early,
and then I realized we're like the only people here.
It's officially, we've done enough work for the year.
Should we have taken this time off?
Should we have just taken two weeks off to end the year?
We're the only people in this complex right now.
One week is plenty.
There's some other folks here.
I hope there's other guys in this complex
because what someone did in that thing
in that gentleman's room,
let me tell you this, there are no gentlemen, whoever that person is.
What are they doing there?
Whatever it was, it was enough for me to just kind of
do the walk-in, Abe Simpson walk-out
dot Jeff.
Abe Simpson?
Grandpa?
Is that his name?
Isn't Abe the grandpa?
I thought it's Homer in that gif.
No, no, no.
There's one of Abe.
Homer's the one backing into the bushes.
At least the Simpsons don't have any diehard fans who will let us know if we're wrong on this.
No, you're right, David.
You crushed that, dude.
Dude, I'm ground floor Simpsons.
I really was ground floor.
Haven't watched it in a long time.
Have y'all ever worked a job where you had to work the holidays?
Yes.
Absolutely.
No.
Your privilege is just screaming from the rooftops right now.
That's not true.
I worked a lot growing up.
I just didn't work in retail.
Luckily, I had been left off the schedule before it rolled around at Subway.
Actually, that's best-case scenario.
You don't want to deal with somebody who's just on hour three
trying to find a toy for their kid, and they roll in wanting a super-specialized combo
on Asiago cheddar, and you don't have it because you forgot to bake the bread the night before.
You know how it is.
I don't.
You forgot, or you didn't feel like it?
You had too many Coronas?
I did not, but some people I did work with got the call from one of the owners
or one of the managers, not the owners, said,
we have no bread.
We're out of bread.
And it's like, oh, I forgot to make the bread.
Kind of important.
Delayed the opening.
They lost a lot of money.
I can't believe you left off the schedule, dude.
That's crazy.
Again, it wasn't me.
Had nothing to do with it.
I did have a Corona or two in the meat freezer.
The meat locker?
The meat locker.
I've worked two different jobs around this time of year,
and I think I can wholeheartedly say it's the worst fucking time of the year to work.
I put up a poll recently on the Sunday Scaries Instagram,
and it was asking if people like to work this time of year
or like to take the time off.
And there were two very, very conflicting schools of thought.
One was take it off.
Everyone else is doing stuff.
Go enjoy yourself.
You know, no one's working anyway.
Just go let it rip.
The other was no one's in the office.
You can just go work and not have to do anything the entire time with no supervision.
And I still don't know if I see eye to eye with that.
Isn't it more depressing to be in the office when no one else is there?
A lot of it is dependent on who your office crew is.
If you're a grind boy, I could see that being a pretty good environment for you.
The benefits of that are you don't have to go travel during the most expensive time.
You don't have to go travel during the busiest time. And you can take that time off at other
times and save that PTO. and i get that but i think
i i think i'm scarred because i've i worked two jobs i did one was retail which is just an absolute
beating this time of year never did that the other one was being a ski instructor between the days of
chris like the 26th and the 31st because that's when everyone's trying to go get ski lessons
and that was just difficult if you're a 20 year old and you're just going out every night and then having to teach like three year olds how to ski the next day it's just not
a fun way to cure a hangover can i tell you i feel like that's the life of every ski instructor ever
oh my gosh like those are they not just party people who work in those those mountain resort
towns they they i think they party harder harder than anybody man like every night or every day
i guess i get off work at like 4 or whatever
and just go hit the bars. Well, there was one day where I was
like, I mean, we took it deep
the night before. It was like a 2am,
3am night. And I remember waking up the
next day being like, I really hope none of these parents try to
talk to me face to face because they're just going to smell like
whiskey on my breath right now. I can't get it out.
It's just the fucking worst.
Do you think anyone's even going to listen to this
episode? Probably not. Get three or four people. I don't know think anyone's even going to listen to this episode?
Probably not.
You get three or four people.
I don't know.
It's got to be tough because this is the bendiest time of year.
It is really bendy.
I'm going to go find that tweet.
Please don't.
What if you didn't, though? I missed that tweet.
No.
Feeling bendy.
Might never delete, I think was the caption.
Randy off mic.
So you're just opening the floodgates to these people.
This is our gift from circling back to you for this Christmas season.
Dylan's going to give you the Bendy tweet.
Did he delete it?
He's been shadow banned.
He said might never delete, but I think he deleted it.
Well, it was pinned to the top of his profile.
In the Twitter terms of service, there is a Bendy clause.
I heard once Jack was out there like, nope, delete every Bendy tweet there is.
That's why Jack resigned.
Jack saw the Bendy tweet and he's like, yeah, I'm done.
Man, can't find it.
You know, this app is free.
That's my least favorite. No, that's app is free. That's my least favorite.
No, that's good.
No, that's my least favorite quote tweet of any tweet.
No, this is a.
This app is free.
Maybe he went pry.
Working this job.
I think he went pre.
Or working a job this week in particular.
Let's say you're doing sales or recruiting or something.
Anybody you call on, they're not answering. And you're going to or recruiting or something anybody you call on they're not answering and
you're going to be bugging them so you're just sitting in there gun shy because i'm or i wasn't
because i was or i was gun shy because i'm not shameless and you just feel like an asshole
meanwhile like you you everybody you work with is out doing like dope vacations and stuff and
you're just like sending texts to lads to see who's even
going to be in town.
I think that might be the worst part of actually working
throughout the week. Sure, you don't have a boss there,
but when you go on the internet
and you see everybody in cozy situations
just hanging out with their family,
that's what kills me inside.
Look, man, this could be a lonely time of year for a lot of folks.
It's true.
Unfortunately.
Like you just said, people are off traveling with their families or at home.
Everyone has that opportunity.
Maybe you're stuck working in several states away from your family and you can't get off.
Maybe you're stuck because you still feel comfortable traveling.
Think about that dylan it's
tough man i don't know shouts everyone out there that's grinding right now no dude the worst part
is like that that last day that the office is open and you're there and you're like oh man i
heard like a couple years ago like the boss call he'll he'll like close it down at two or three
yeah and you're waiting and
you're like it's three and the phone rings you look over like one of the admin it's just like
no not him and everybody's just waiting and then like he closes it at five or no at four excuse me
the office closes at five gives you that extra hour like cool man i guess i'll just go home and
fuck myself not literally not getting bendy here i to say, are you bendy enough to do that?
Oh, goddammit, Randy.
He found it.
All right.
Put that in the group.
I want to see it.
No, no, no.
Don't put it in the group.
Don't put it in the group.
I think it's time to get out of here.
Can we leave?
Can we leave?
Wish everyone a very bendy Monday.
Did you find it in the group
or is it still on Twitter?
Okay, so I have some announcements to make, okay?
You guys ready for these announcements?
Oh, gosh.
This is for all the patrons out there.
Tomorrow, we will be doing listener voicemails.
888-618-4422.
Get in, get out, be tactical.
That's going to get released tomorrow.
Wednesday, we're doing our normal circling back episode,
and then we're going to finish the year out with what everyone wants,
our recap of the three-hour finale of The Bachelorette.
If you would like to leave a voicemail for that episode,
The Bachelorette one,
please do not hesitate to do it.
Match that 888-618-4422 button.
We will be releasing that first thing on Wednesday,
and then we're taking the rest of the year off.
Dave, I don't want to see this anymore.
Is it the Bindi tweet?
Please say bye just so we can get done with all this.
No, I just looked it up on Urban Dictionary.
What, Bindi?
What?
Bye.