Circling Back - Disney Swingers, Josh Memes, and Chipotle BBQ
Episode Date: January 17, 2024An absolutely loaded episode after a long weekend. We've got Recapping This Weekend in Fun, breaking down Josh wine memes, the cringey Disney swingers couple, peeling an orange for your significant ot...her, possible drugs in a Subway sandwich, a Chipotle selling barbecue with mac and cheese, This Weekend in Fun, and more. Enjoy a free one-week trial on Patreon for additional weekly episodes: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on our new YouTube channel: www.youtube.com/circlingback Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (11:15) Recapping This Weekend in Fun (28:14) Josh Wine Memes (35:20) Disney Swingers Couple (47:30) Peeling an Orange for your Wife (54:20) Was there cocaine on this Subway sandwich? (1:05:00) Chipotle serving BBQ (1:13:50) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Fitbod: www.fitbod.me/steam (20% off) Factor: www.factormeals.com/circling50 (code circling50 for 50% off) Stamps: www.stamps.com/circlingback (4-week trial, free postage, and a digital scale — code CIRCLINGBACK) This episode was also sponsored by BetterHelp: www.betterhelp.com/circling (10% off first month) Songfinch: www.songfinch.com/circling (add Spotify Streaming for your original song for FREE! That’s a $50 value!) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from
washed media hq in austin texas my name is will defries
to my left david ruff i just don't know about this coachella lineup
not really feeling it this year i may not go who are the headies
um i think the only band that you might be interested in would be uh Deftones I might go just that Friday just for uh Deftones but maybe
you're into uh blur is Cannibal Corpse gonna be there it doesn't look like it maybe you're into
um Tyler the Creator I'm not familiar with his his stuff man. Can I interest you in No Doubt?
No.
Dude, No Doubt.
No.
Gwen Stefani is married to Blake Shelton.
It's not something I truly support.
And therefore, I think she is sold out.
And I will not be supporting No Doubt,
despite how good Tragic Kingdom is as an album from top to bottom.
Could be
a case made that it is no skips. Did you know or date a young lady in probably high school
who had an answering machine? And that answering machine was, sorry, I'm not home right now. I'm
walking in the spider webs because I may or may not have. I don't mean to date myself.
I don't think I'd call that person back.
Sounds like you were dating someone else.
Dylan Chivary.
I don't know, man.
It's just weird.
A guy shows up to work in a brand new Western shacket.
And one person acknowledges it.
And it's neither of you two.
Once or nothing.
It's like, what are we even doing?
I'll be honest.
I didn't even know that was new.
I didn't either.
I thought you'd worn that before.
Well, guess what?
It's new.
Could that even be mistaken
for a jacket?
No, it's really just a shirt.
Okay.
So why are you asking us
to compliment your jacket
if it's just a shirt?
I'm sure some acknowledgement
It's just kind of warm.
I'm a little surprised
you're not going to go
jacket off.
Well, look who's
already getting horny. Two and a half minutes in to go jack it off. Well, look who's already getting horny.
Two and a half minutes in.
I took mine off.
Very cold this morning.
Rocking my washed media hoodie.
More on that later.
Parks wore a scarf to school today, which is mega cute.
He wanted to.
Because his old man had one on too.
He's like, you know what?
I'm going to scarf up too, player.
He didn't say it. That wasn't his delivery what? I'm going to scarf up too, player.
He didn't say it.
That wasn't his delivery.
That was mine.
Scarf up.
Cute, though.
That's all I got, man.
Can I ask you two guys a question?
Yes.
Did y'all get far enough in Yellowstone for Taylor Sheridan, executive producer and I believe writer, creator,
to just create a character for himself,
where all he does is do badass shit on a horse for six episodes in horse montages.
I did not know that happened.
I rode off into the sunset long before that happened.
Because I'm there, and it's absolutely excessive.
You wrote this character, and not only does the character do world-class horse riding stuff,
like spins and reins in the horse and stuff, like spins and, you know,
reins in the horse and stuff, also gets a lot of chicks and likes to tell you about it.
Wait, is he the guy who's a dick to Jimmy?
Yeah.
Oh, that's who that is?
I didn't know.
Yeah.
Okay, yeah.
I guess he just wrote himself in.
I didn't know that.
Interesting.
Yeah.
I'm too busy watching like actually good television like prestige tv
like what like love island australia i'm on episode five a lot of a lot of twists and turns
any gas lighting a lot of gas lighting it's just been a really really good season can't wait to
bucket for love island all-stars i like how you worked in bucket unfortunately it's kind of a dark day in washed media oh no um it's been tough
we didn't really forecast this coming as soon as it did uh but you know with the cold outside
there's been a lapse in people in the office maybe we just haven't been on our a game
and i've said something to randy that i'm gonna have him put on the screen and i just want to know like how everyone's feeling about it how we're going to get through it and and what what
we do to really build on this Randy can you put this up please oh god how does this make you guys
feel we've been over this this is damning wait what is going on here? We've been over this. I can see your hand perfectly through that paper.
So wait, is this some sort of decorative paper you got from MJ Designs, from Michaels?
What's going on here?
What is that?
That can't be toilet paper.
Yeah, what you're seeing on the screen right now is one of the most translucent pieces of toilet paper I've ever seen in my entire life.
And it's currently all we have at Wash Media headquarters. It was purchased from OfficeMax down the street months ago.
We're lucky that someone had a backup, some backup rolls ready in case we ran out of the
good stuff. You're welcome. That stuff is so flammable.
It's awful. Dylan, is it true that when you give gifts,
that's what you stuff the little baggie with? Yeah, I just buy TP from OfficeMax.
That's what it looks like.
We had some high society toilet paper for a little bit.
Randy even complained.
The Midwest jumped out of Randy,
and he complained about it being too bougie because it had, instead of having the straight line
that you rip it on, it was a curved one.
I thought it was kind of ball.
Wavy.
Yeah.
What, Randy?
That's just Charmin across the board now.
Don't worry, folks at home home i've ordered more toilet paper hey is that how like companies like toilet
paper companies they have they're not going to change their product but they have to find new
ways to market it so they just put little waves now with waves like we don't need this it's like
bud light with a vortex model no no no that's miller light david and please please
don't disrespect vortex bottles as it was the most efficient way to drink a beer you could
really chug it yep you and i just realized like a couple minutes ago three days ago we had our
five-year anniversary and no one said a single word about it it's still is that true here's the
thing dude three days ago five years we're Five years. We're too busy grinding.
We're too busy grinding, dude.
It was on a Sunday, but still.
I recently told someone it was four years.
Damn it.
Wow.
Can you believe that?
You must have sounded like a total dumbass to them.
People say the first five are your hardest.
You don't turn a profit for the first five, they say.
Yeah.
Now it's time to start making a little bit of coin.
So, hey, congratulations, guys.
We made it five years.
Five years now we can afford double ply.
Randy, how does it feel?
It feels great.
It feels, as the office manager ordering the toilet paper,
I feel good about where we are.
You're not the office manager.
I'm office manager, Randy.
No, I'm fine with that.
I'm fine with Omar.
You're not the office manager.
He could be.
He's pretty good.
I don't know.
I've never seen a vacuum in Randy's hand before
unless he's taken it out to his place. He didn't know how to work that vacuum. No. He just be. He's pretty good. I don't know. I've never seen a vacuum in Randy's hand before unless he's taken it out to his place.
He didn't know how to work that vacuum. No. He just
takes all of our equipment home.
He's had Dave's ladder in his place for
a while now. Only guy who lives with a
firefighter doesn't have a full-size ladder.
That's very true. I was trying to film some content
the other day and I was looking for an iPhone tripod
and they were all at Randy's place for some reason.
How many do you need?
I put some air tags on it and from what I could see, they were just all Randy's place for some reason. How many do you need? I put some air tags on it, and from what I could see,
they were just all set up around his bed.
That is such a lie because my personal iPhone mount is here in the office.
I don't know.
That toilet paper is really bad, man.
It's the most translucent toilet paper I've ever seen.
It was more translucent than I remembered it being,
and when I took the first square off, I thought to myself,
no way is this the actual toilet paper. i think i separated it from the other ply
that's no that's worse than prison toilet paper dude i think prison like i think people in prison
are throwing up looking at this photo right if if the prison replaced their regular tp with this
they get so many complaints like hey what's going on guards would be going down left and right yeah
not be good this is the stuff like in in high school when you're rolling somebody's house.
If you pulled up, you're like, dude, I got toilet paper right here.
If you threw that up, it would just break like on contact.
Yeah, it wouldn't even work.
And everybody would be mad.
Like, why did you buy this shit?
Yeah.
We need better backup toilet paper.
You have to fold over like four times to get like a regular thickness.
That's not good.
I'm going to snooze if it comes down to it.
When is the teepee going to arrive?
It's supposed to today.
Okay.
That's good.
Okay.
That's good.
That's good.
That's good.
Fucking cornholio over there.
That's real bad, man.
Well, in lieu of our Monday episode, we got an absolutely loaded rundown today, a marathon
episode of sorts.
So let's get right into it.
First and foremost, there's not very many Wilmont's Polos left.
They're still available at roback.com. Use code BACK backer20 for 20% off there's only larges left if you want it
we're entering it's going to be it's going to be moisture waking season before we even know it I
know it's only like 23 degrees outside right now but don't don't get behind the eight ball and be
like chill out Dylan and be like oh like I should have gotten this while I couldn't we're not going
to feel bad for you go order your row dude. Yesterday, we did exactly five minutes beyond the paywall.
Tomorrow, we'll be releasing our listener voicemail episode, 888-618-4422, if you want
to get it in under the wire. Go read our newsletter, washed.substack.com. Again,
washed.substack.com. If you want to watch all these episodes and see our beautiful faces,
substack.com. And if you want to watch all these episodes and see our beautiful faces,
youtube.com slash circling back. But without further ado, it's time to recap this past weekend and fun presented by our friends over at FitBod. The essential workout you really need
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It's also the spice of your workout. It's true. Yeah. It'll tailor your workout specifically for
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I like that you differentiated the tiers because Dylan's clearly the oldest.
Right.
I wasn't going to say it, but you're like the middle child and I'm the youngest.
Nine months younger than I am.
You're clearly the oldest.
Nine months is a long time.
It's a full term.
It's a full pregnancy term.
Technically, you could be his dad.
No.
Nine months? It's a long, long time. It's a full pregnancy term. Technically, you could be his dad. No. Nine months?
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Dylan, I know it was a while ago.
Yeah, I'm sitting here just wrecking my brain.
Did you do anything brazy over the weekend, dog?
I'm trying to remember. No, I mean, I hunkered down at the end of the weekend because it was, you know. Yeah. I'm sitting here just wrecking my brain. Did you do anything brazy over the weekend, dog? I'm trying to remember.
No.
I mean, I hunkered down at the end of the weekend because it was, you know, the weather
had moved in.
But I did like nothing.
You didn't.
What did I do?
You took the solo stove out of your place, right?
I know it's smokeless, but you're not supposed to put that in the middle of your living room.
No, I don't have my solo stove with me right now.
I had a date over the weekend, which is notable, but that's pretty much it man yeah i didn't do much tell us everything about the date what's her at
where'd you guys go i forgot what the order was oh i got it right here i forgot is this a first date
uh no okay i was gonna say second this is number three so you didn't you didn't go by randy's rules
for first dates like you talked about on yesterday's
Patreon episode?
No.
Because it was a third date.
You didn't.
No, no.
I didn't.
That makes sense.
Yeah.
That makes sense.
Or my own because it was, again, a third date.
Anyway, that's it.
I'm behind the paywall if you want to know what Randy does on a first date.
Which is disgusting, by the way.
You guys want to go listen to it.
It's pretty normal stuff.
Yeah. And I didn't do much. I had parks. had parks we chilled man sunday we couldn't really do much
because it was so freaking cold outside yeah that's facts dude that's facts wasn't that bad
monday as well because it was a holiday and i had parks monday and we just we hunkered down
played some fortnight watched a movie it's sick You didn't watch any football over the weekend?
I watched some football, yeah.
Okay, just making sure.
I watched football.
It was wild card weekend.
I was wild hard for it.
Yeah, I was for about, I don't know, six minutes.
Yeah.
Dave, tell us about your weekend, man.
You're already moving on to mine.
Yeah, mine was pretty lame-o.
Ooh, hey, I don't know which one of you guys
recommended the movie Leo.
Yeah, it's your boy.
It's your boy?
I tried to get my son to watch.
Yeah.
He's not ready for it yet,
according to him.
He just wanted to watch Lucas the Spider.
But I did check it out,
and I do want to watch it.
It's pretty good, dude.
Pretty good.
Bill Burr.
Oh, yeah, it is Bill Burr, I guess. Yeah,'ve got some pretty uh adult jokes in that movie that kids would never realize
and it's like okay i see you yeah i see you funny man as someone who's watched a bill burr stand-up
set with his entire office in a conference room i'm a big fan i mean after this temperature dip
they've been calling me bill burr wow dude presented by our friends over at premier cold
plunge i'm just kidding well i watched salt burn too didn't you do that too how many times did you
rewind the uh bathtub scene i fast forward at nine it wasn't as uh aggressive as people said
i agree i agree i think i think it got a little oversold. Like, I saw someone tweet something, and this was kind of a hard-o tweet, but it was like,
can tell who doesn't watch weird movies.
Yeah, it was just regular weird.
It wasn't super weird.
What regular weird, like Donnie Darko?
Or what are we talking here?
I don't know.
Yeah, I think Donnie Darko is like the entrance into weird movies.
Like, the final scene was probably the most aggressive
because you get some aggressive wiener shots.
That's fine.
Gratuitous wiener.
Was he driving the wienermobile?
No, I'm talking about private parts.
You're talking about Micah's uncle?
No.
What's the British version of El Glissadente?
King Gliss the Fourth?
El Bangers.
Okay.
I'm presenting
King Banger
Anyways
Do you want to know about my weekend or not dude?
Yeah
Then stop talking about
British hot dogs dude
It's inappropriate
Oh my god
You know
I went and saw a band
I went to a concert I just love concerts dude i just collect bands
live music dude we live in a live music capital the world and um anytime i have a chance to
scratch that jam band itch i exclusively consume jam band music and jam bands in general through
cover bands i don't miss one in particular I don't miss a Bob Weir show.
I don't miss a Touch of Trey show, it turns out.
Dude, you can't be missing Touch of Trey.
We got there in the middle of, I believe, the fish portion of the show.
This band does a little fish, not a little real big fish,
a little fish, a little dead.
Sellout!
I wish.
If they just went into that, I have gone wild but that was a good
time we watched uh a little bit of football beforehand at levaka street which was a good
scene we saw y'all somehow i showed up late hey y'all had acquired a phenomenal table dude what's
up with that like levaka street i've always considered to be like this really busy bar
that's impossible to go get a drink at i mean i walked straight up to the bar every single time and got a nice frosty boy it was busy but not crazy yeah like i mean we we had very limited
time to sit there and i was surprised that i could easily get two beers in without having to stand in
line to get a beer i could use a bar outing soon okay drink at the bar with the boys you should go
do that yeah maybe you could come with i don don't know. Anyway, touch a tray.
Don't care.
Touch a tray.
Dude, how about those crazy-ass white boys in the front row?
Oh, man.
We just watched.
There was a group of dudes who I would say probably three to four years out of college,
probably all working like they're probably associates at accounting firms, law firms, whatever.
Very much stereotypical.
Austin probably went to UT, SIGGAP types.
Some of these dudes went to TCU.
TCU.
Yeah, you're right.
And they were – a couple were so belligerent.
I think one of them got asked to leave.
No – rarely do you see someone getting asked to leave the uh the touch of
trey the grateful dead cover band show but they did yeah getting fresh prince jazzed out of a uh
a cover band is it's tough you don't want to be the guy who gets booted
no and usually if you get booted it's like oh that guy took too much uh too much acid like
he doesn't know where he is we need need to help him. It was more like,
these guys are, like,
going to get in a fight.
Dude, they started a mosh pit.
They're moshing it.
They started a mosh pit.
No one's doing that.
That's sick.
It was kind of sick.
Did you mix it up?
I was kind of one of those people
that was like,
man, don't kick him out.
Like, come on.
I had too much fun watching him.
Yeah, like, he's bringing in,
like, I think the band's
actually liking it right now.
Like, don't kick him out.
A lot of all birds.
People throwing hands in a mosh.
Not a touch of Trey. Yeah. It it's an older crowd the only time i've seen actual hands
exchanged in a mosh pit was at a dropkick murphy show makes sense and people were just like yeah
they were just dudes that thought they were like irish that just wanted to fight people
that's sick i got out of there just watching dudes in ons just go crazy with their tech vests.
It was phenomenal.
These guys all dressed like they were possible interns for TFM in 2016.
Yeah.
And it was like, yeah, January.
It was a great time.
Sunday, real low key, the weather had changed.
It got a little cool.
Stayed indoors.
Also woke up a little congested.
Wasn't feeling great.
I probably sound like that still.
It's very hard to kick.
But we did our first fire.
We didn't really get past the starter log, but we did it, and it was fun.
The chimney sweep did his work house is still
standing i feel like you got that chimney sweep so long ago dave we did you're wasting your yeah
you got you have you have the gift of a fireplace i know not to brag but and then my my son uh three
and your partner he's not he's his name isn't three but he's now he's like wants a fire at all times now, which we knew was going to happen.
So now it's like he wakes up like, can we do a fire?
Like, no, we can't.
Dude, morning fires are chill as hell.
That's cute.
It is.
Morning fires are so chill.
Just make them one.
I remember being obsessed with the fireplace when I was a kid too.
Sunday, man, just was just wild hard for wild card.
And then I was really looking forward to 330.
And then at about three, I would say about 348, maybe 355.
I was no longer excited for the games.
It was actually quite sad.
So, yeah.
Yeah.
More on that.
We're going to do a special Too Much Dip tomorrow.
More on that.
We're going to do a special Too Much Dip tomorrow.
We're going to let Micah Weiner, nephew of Anthony O'Pine, on the game.
In all matters, Dallas Cowboys.
It'll be fun.
So, Will, I will yield my time to you.
Anthony O'Pine.
Cork County boy.
I don't know what I'm doing. You don't know about that.
Yeah, you wouldn't know, dude.
You're not cut from the same cloth we are.
They don't make us like...
You are not different.
Wasn't it just like a...
What did that guy explain one time?
Why so many people are Cork County?
Why don't you stop trying to diminish our heritage?
It's like the Ellis Island of Ireland or something.
Do we diminish your heritage?
I don't diminish your heritage.
I'm trying to recollect right now.
Yeah, I don't think I diminish your heritage. People just pass through and put their name down and it's like you don't
spend any time there yeah you didn't get invited there though i was too busy uh i don't know doing
something else go ahead you good stuff you irish book had the random gift of a random reservation
as my wife is one of those people that just makes random reservations and then forgets about them.
And so we did a last-minute dinner at Uchiba downtown.
I think right now it's my current favorite place going.
There's been a lot of complaints from a lot of people about the service at this restaurant.
I have not seen any of these.
We had excellent service.
I've had great service the three times that I've been, and it's getting my seal of approval.
Wow.
There it is. I feel like when we went a month or two ago,
the service was so good that you could tell
that they had had complaints about it,
because it was just one after the other.
It wasn't intrusive.
But I've also heard complaints after we went.
They had an all-hands meeting that morning,
like, look, we've got to step this shit up.
We got the original D-man.
Just a bunch of hands showing up for a meeting.
Yeah, right?
Weird.
We got putting Will in tonight.
We got to have a fucking...
A game.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
You know your boy just went absolutely off.
Had a scallop roll.
I don't fucking know.
Cooked or not?
You get to cook a scallop?
I don't think of it's sushi is it was it
sush i mean they just they did a thinly sliced little okay that's what it sounded like when they
did it you were back there when i cut it up interesting yeah i paid for the kitchen package
where you get to go back and watch them make your sushi y'all are sitting the kitchen table at um
pf chang's remember they had that oh yeah a table
baller dude baller i never got to do that no i never got to do it either that'd be sick
dave i'd be surprised if you hadn't done it well i worked in the kitchen for a number of years so
yeah sal and i stayed at a restaurant or stayed at a hotel on our honeymoon that had like the
the chef's table and i was like oh that looks cool like we should try to do that and then i
saw the price of it and I was like,
hold on, what? Just to sit
in the kitchen? A worse part of the restaurant?
I have to pay that much money?
Getting grease popping on your face.
It's like, what are you doing back here?
You pay extra dill and old baby bird some
lo mein to you.
Hell yeah, I will.
You just have a bunch of dudes going like,
yes, chef, behind you the entire time?
It doesn't sound like that.
I don't want that.
Just lady in the tramping egg noodle.
Yeah, you know your boy hit touch a tray.
We just don't miss a show, dude.
No, we're like kind of groupies now.
Yeah.
If I can get a tall boy yingling and watch them do tweezers straight into Franklin's Tower,
I'm doing that every single time, dog.
It's just happening, dude.
That was a highlight for me, too.
I went home that night, and I just played FIFA endlessly.
Just couldn't sleep.
I was too wired, man.
Why not?
Because I was so wired from the show.
And so I just sat there and played FIFA for a while.
And I got news for everybody.
You don't want to play me in FC24 right now.
I'm different.
Really?
I'm absolutely different.
Cut from a different cloth.
I've only lost two games since I fired this thing up.
I'm just making it rain goals.
Really?
Yeah.
It's just ugly for the ops, dude.
The guy lives in the back of the net.
I'm him.
Damn, that's so sick.
Yeah.
And so, not to brag, but I did buy a bench this weekend.
You're going to start working out? no no no this is uh this is a wooden bench with some uh metal uh feet on it uh needed a
little makeshift console and so yeah your boy went and scooped a bench uh how's it work i got it for
79 off of 500 that seemed like a pretty good deal I would also like someone to explain to me why any bench should ever cost $500.
Hard to say.
Just a bench.
Yeah.
It's hard to sit.
And yeah, I spent Sunday just getting ready for the Lions.
Went to Matt's El Rancho.
Had a knockout martini, which I probably didn't need on a Sunday night.
But, you know, I'm him, so it doesn't matter.
Right.
And, yeah, went home and watched the Lions.
It's a first playoff win since 1991.
It's a beautiful day.
Congratulations.
Thank you.
Feels good.
Very excited for what the rest of the postseason could hold for us.
I'm happy for y'all.
I just don't care for how you guys booed Matt Stafford's family.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, here's the thing.
Like, they had to catch some L's.
Look, it's objectively funny
to boo someone's family.
I mean, his wife shit on Detroit
like endlessly
when she was like, you know,
winding things down there.
Did you see poor Jerry Krause's widow
at the Bulls game?
Yeah, they weren't even booing. thought they were they were saying bulls no they weren't what were they booing an old woman
they're doing like they're honoring jerry the late jerry kraus and his widow is there and they're
booing him and she was just like got like visibly emotional i thought it was a spooky season
activation i could be wrong she's an old she's an old lady it was a spooky season activation. I could be wrong. She's an old lady.
It was a sad scene, man. Well, you know,
she's got billions of dollars probably.
Or millions. I'm in favor
of billionaires. Hey, rich people can get
their feelings hurt too, Dave.
Yeah, and then they wipe their tears with dollar bills
like they're in Dumb and Dumber.
I don't think they actually do that. And then guys like us, we wipe
our tears with one-ply toilet paper.
That's right. Just goes, breaks,
doesn't even wipe a tear. Because we're different.
Yeah, I'm cut from a different cloth, but
that cloth is actually one-ply toilet paper.
We're the ply boys.
Oh, they're so annoying. No, we're not.
Yeah.
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Something we didn't talk about in this weekend of fun
is how I just scrolled the timeline the entire time
wanting a glass of red wine,
specifically Josh.
Do you guys freak with Josh? i i didn't know about josh
i rock with josh because josh rocks with us how did you not know about josh i don't know you're
the wino of the group yeah but i i stay on the bottom two shelves josh is definitely not on the
third shelf oh i knew about josh yeah okay before we even talk about the actual memes that occurred with Josh,
like,
Randy,
if you just want to
toss them up on the screen
and just,
you know,
give the people
a little perspective here,
I don't understand
the people are,
I don't understand
why people are anti-Josh
in the first place
because I actually
really like Josh.
It's never treated me poorly.
It's classist.
Having a cork pulled out
probably feels so good for a Bible job.
Probably does, dude.
That's a good point.
Probably does.
Yeah, I missed a wave on these.
I feel like I'm, yeah, man.
I was late.
I was like, I don't get it really.
Just because the name's Josh and it's like a generic white guy name.
Well, Dave, what was the tweet that started it all?
Well, I'm glad you asked
will um someone i believe is uh at optimus grind underscore on twitter that's good it's a good name
he said uh he held up a picture of a bottle of josh and he said i'm not going to keep telling
y'all to grow up and leave that stella and barefoot alone and it's a bottle of josh clearly
saying time you up your game it's time to step it up get onto this j and Barefoot alone. And it's a bottle of Josh. Clearly saying, time you up your game.
It's time to step it up, get on to this Josh shit.
It's funny that it's called Josh.
I mean, that's the joke, right?
Because it's called Josh.
Well, it's also a sub-$20 bottle.
And sometimes it's sub-$10.
Who is Josh?
That's the thing.
Who's the man behind the grapes?
Right.
I want to meet this Josh fella.
Yeah, Josh Cabernet is just a simple 17.99 online right now
they're having a moment though surely uh
they're hard to get right now because the memes are just going wild dude i don't know like i
haven't been to the store to get my josh but i i'm not kidding when i say i wouldn't be surprised
if a lot of stores didn't have that much josh right now yeah all over the tl people want to do bits like
josh for a while was just my go-to bottle of wine when i just wanted something for a little
weeknight sip sip really yeah what's your weeknight sip sip right now something from
naked wines surely do you step it up dude well they're a sponsor so oh yeah you got this is one of those situations where
where dylan got an entire box an entire box of bottles of wine you have one coming i'm sure i
do i've been and you owe me one of those bottles remember i don't know if you're gonna get a back
play boy that's why i didn't get a box delivered you gotta give me one you had to you had to pay
the early tax you got no buddy that ain't that's not how it works, dawg. I'll be out.
You guys are still cooking over there with plenty of wine.
You always show up with a box of Roebuck that's like picked over and you're like, oh, hey,
this came to my place this weekend.
I haven't opened it yet.
They're delivered to the office.
There's like one polo in there for Randy.
They're to the office.
Hey, I was just playing about that joke I made.
Okay.
I thought...
I could tell you were joking.
Do you want to know the story of Josh?
Yeah. Give us the background of our king.
Joseph Carr created Josh Sellers in 2007 as a tribute to his dad, Josh.
Joseph's way of honoring all that his father had done for him.
You think that's a joke, buddy? I don't.
Josh was a lumberjack by trade who also served in the US Army. You
feel bad now? You should. And he also volunteered as a local firefighter.
Oh, wow. So not only do you disrespect the troops, but you also disrespect public
. Hey, Dylan, it gets better.
Wait, the last thing is sellers?
Yeah.
Like wine? Think about it. They're doing a play.
It's a fun play.
They're doing a play.
He worked hard and instilled values of dedication and perseverance in his children, Joseph and
his twin sister, Lisa.
I don't care about that part.
These values drove Joseph to create Josh Sellers.
Hard work and a commitment to quality ensure that all Josh Sellers wines represent the
best of California.
They're well-balanced, delicious, and crafted to exacting standards.
Something you don't give a fuck about.
It'd be nice if naked wines got them under their umbrella you don't have exacting standards that's something
i've learned about you yeah i do no you don't i know joseph isn't here to fight for his product
right now but i'm just gonna do it for him okay you want to meet their winemaker wayne i want to
meet josh yeah dude let's get wayne on the pod does he have a phone number let's just call and
be like hey is wayne donaldson there wayne joseph and josh i think josh passed away right yeah i think he's
gone yeah shout out to his sister lisa though his legacy lives on though what's that hold on let's
find it look all i know is the memes are good okay you read this one but you have to do it and
dylan can you read this one, please?
Pour up.
Josh.
Can we all do the Josh part?
No, that'd be weird.
Will, you do the Josh part.
Nah, nah.
Randy, do the Josh part.
You're the one who dug the hole.
You got to get out of it.
Headshot.
Someone do it.
Randy will do it.
Yeah, Randy should do it.
Pour up.
Josh.
Headshot.
Josh.
Sit down.
Josh.
Stand up. Josh. Pass out. Josh. Wake up. Josh. Faded. pour up josh headshot josh sit down josh stand up josh pass out josh wake up josh faded josh faded
josh we got there man that was really beautiful guys you guys just started barbershop quartet
should we yeah dude too many bottles of josh we can't pronounce would it shock you if you found
out randy was in like a quartet club in high school or like a no league club no very on brand
why have you tried you can find your voice dude oh yeah thank you you just did a really good job
with dylan some say you found it here with washed media you said that i was trying to steal your
valor being a podcaster not too long ago do you have
you still a lot of valor do you do karaoke randy it seems like something you'd like to do i've
never done karaoke since i've been a kid oh i want to i want to do mambo number five i'd crush it
really one two three four five everybody in the car come on let's ride okay i know that
you can work on it.
You said you didn't have a good voice.
Thank you.
It sounded beautiful to me.
Dude, I freak with it.
Here's some more memes.
No.
What if you're at home and you can't see it?
Read the meme.
Dude, the bar maiden's just, she's calling to you, Dylan.
She wants you to drink that Josh.
Oh, Dylan, I got a glass of Josh for you.
She's going to put you in the bathtub.
She's going to draw you a bath after getting you drunk on Josh Playboy.
Someone spent way too much time
doing this one.
No, they didn't.
The labels are accurate.
Read it.
The barmaid and temptress
calls to you
and the meme says,
hello, traveler,
would you care for some Josh?
No, read it in the accent
that's implied.
No, you do it.
Hello, traveler,
would you care for some Josh?
It's pretty good.
You surpassed expectations there
which were high y'all know i'm bad at accents i get uncomfortable why because i'm so bad at them
you can't do a british accent you do all right just do a newcastle accent do your newcastle
and then do your your london accent all right no can we talk about the most uncomfortable video Your London accent. No.
Can we talk about the most uncomfortable video that I've seen on the internet in definitely 2024?
I was hoping we weren't going to do this.
No, we have to do it.
Randy, I've put a video up for the class. I love this video.
No, it's not great.
It's not great.
You guys are familiar with Disney World.
I would like to bring my children there at some point as one of the most core memories I have was going to Disney World with my parents as a kid.
I absolutely loved it. I would not consider myself to be a Disney adult, but I do think that there's
value in Disney. And when I saw this couple promoting something, I was like, oh, I should
watch this. I have a wife. I think it'd be fun to go to Disney. Dude, don't sleep on the Lightning
McQueen and the Ratatouille t-shirts they're each wearing.
Dude, shout out to Fratatouille from the old days.
I wonder what he's up to.
I fall on his road.
Dove hunting?
Probably.
Ratatouille?
Fratatouille.
Fratatouille definitely dove hunts.
Yeah.
Oh, absolutely.
Will, did Fritz ever go through a Mickey Mouse or Disney at all phase?
No.
His favorite app is definitely Disney Plus.
It's a good app.
But he's not going through the traditional stuff.
He thinks Moana is just called Ana.
And when he asked for it, he thinks it means more Ana.
Oh, that's cute.
I get it.
So it gets a little confusing, especially when there's Ana and Elsa from Frozen, another
movie that he was really into.
He freaks with Olaf so hard, dude.
Cold never bothered me anyway.
Back in the day, we all wanted Mo, Anna, Kournikova.
Sports Illustrated.
Shout out Sergey Fedorov, dude.
All right, Randy, let's play this video
promoting maybe some trips down to Disney.
Anyone who knows me and my long-term boyfriend
know that we meet a lot of our friends online these days.
We have made a ton of friends in the Disney community, a majority of which we have met on Swingers Upon Maine.
This is an app for swingers by swingers. Swingers that love Disney.
Ashley and I love to swing all over Walt Disney World Resort.
The Grand Floridian.
Main Street, USA.
Cinderella's Castle.
Space Mountain.
And people love to drink around the world.
Well, how about swinging around the world?
It's our favorite.
Swing Upon Maine has Disney lovers
from all over the world.
And we all just come together
in the most magical place on earth.
And heck, why not call it the most fun place on earth too
we don't just trade pins at magic kingdom we trade partners oh boy
you can download the app swing upon maine today and maybe we'll see you there and we'll show you a whole new world dave how how's the UX of that app?
Pretty good.
Is that a real laugh?
I did confirm the app is... I didn't sign up.
No, it's not a real laugh, Dylan.
She can't laugh like that.
Are these people Disney adults?
Are these people just honing in on a place
where they think a lot of swingers will be?
They found a target rich
environment, I think, and they're taking advantage.
Are you ever going to be able to stay at the Grand Floridian ever again
without thinking about these two smashing in a hotel room next to you,
schmanging even?
I'm just on a different wave than these people are.
I don't have much in common.
Am I to assume that they are swinging,
like literally doing the sex at these different locales.
That's what they're...
Like at the place.
Certainly implying that.
Like maybe on one of the rides.
No, then they...
Well, maybe.
Do you think she let him hit
because he's goofy?
There aren't that many rides
that have swings on them.
Literally.
Not that kind of swing.
Well, I see how you'd be confused.
Yeah.
So a swing is something
you can like sit on and you know rock
back and yeah but swinging is like a term for uh swapping partners oh sexually entering the portal
of a sexual type of nature oh okay i get it now i get it now that makes sense
these people i'm speechless.
I mean, she's cute, at least.
She's not.
No offense.
She's kind of cute.
What are you doing?
She just doesn't...
Her issue is that she's just the most cringe human on Earth, maybe.
And that still frame right there,
she looks like when Russell Wilson got drafted, his girlfriend.
Remember that?
It's not that bad.
It's not as bad.'s not as bad as nothing
is as bad as that was it his wife at the time give it i don't know it's not sierra i'll tell
you that much no it's different talk about an upgrade let me upgrade like beyonce i kind of
want to go to epcot what the fuck's wrong with you dude why'd you come over here yeah i'm doing a
show okay what if we did what if we did back shots at the seven dwarves
mine train yeah i looked it up will i don't know the fucking i'm just looking at all these like
yeah like this is remember the twilight zone tower that every single tv show went to back in the day
whenever they do their disney world episodes who could forget this is a family place you know don't go there looking to hook up schmang or schmang what if you uh you finally got into high society like
you you really like breach the elite of the elite you get invited to the like the eyes wide shut
party you know then you wear it you get your little outfit and you put your mask on you're
like oh here we go and you show up and it's this yeah
look everybody's in a mickey mouse costume i'm not an orgy guy i would never go to a thing like
that you're not i'm just like that one time was enough for you some people are orgy people i'm
just not one of them i saw them at the corn family values tour orgy yeah they did they did a great
rendition of blue monday is that a real band? Yeah, they're not good.
I mean, I have it on good faith that a lot of the mascots and characters,
I don't know what you'd call them, the people walking around in the costumes,
I think they schmang on a regular basis.
You think so?
No, I've been told so.
There's a whole subculture of those people just hooking up.
I love that. You know it smelled crazy in that it smelled crazy in that locker you know that that goofy costume you're all sweaty you think gaston was just getting it on the reg
for sure dude are you kidding me challenging people to push-up contests and then just going
on the back and just going to town can you imagine getting the gaston not if you're like
trying out for a part of disney and you're like damn I'm the most frat dude at Disney you know that's how Jason Momoa got his start he was he was he I made that
up oh I would have I would have believed you that'd be cool there's got to be some celebrity
that made their that no actually there probably isn't you don't go from Gaston at Disney World
you don't know that to uh head of the uh Dothraki's it seems like that's that's well
you hear about their weddings have I heard them? They probably look a lot like this.
They're killing people at Disney World?
Probably less bloodshed than East Coast.
Can you imagine this guy brutally...
Actually, I probably couldn't imagine this guy brutally murdering someone.
Yeah, the look in his eyes, it tells me that he might brutally murder me at some point.
This is a promotion.
This video is a promotion for the app, right?
It's a really good promotion for the app, yeah.
Drop the bag.
What's it called?
Singles on Main?
Swinging on Main?
Randy's on it right now.
Yeah, Randy, how is it?
He's either on it or doing it on Instagram.
How many connections do you have?
Let's see.
I'm just trying to look for her.
Just relax, Randy.
Just relax, dude.
Wow.
Do you think they do anything on the slush gusher? I don't know, dude. Wow. Do you think they do anything on the slush gusher?
I don't know, dude.
I mean, you got to think the slush gusher is a pretty good one.
Randy, why is Purdue trending?
I don't know.
You want me to go see?
I'm also trying to figure out what this says.
I think it says...
I don't really want to say what I think it says.
It definitely says wink in a redhead is what we can see.
I think there's a letter in front of that, though.
Yeah, that's what I'm wondering, too.
What is T-wink in a redhead is what we can see. I think there's a letter in front of that, though. Yeah, that's what I'm wondering, too. What is T wink in a redhead?
Why would you have that sign in your place?
Okay, I'm just now seeing this.
Yeah, I don't get why you would have that sign in your place.
There's mixed signals here.
We don't know if there's another letter.
We know there's definitely a W, though.
What do you think it would be?
Ah, you know, who knows?
Hood winked?
Hood wink in a redhead? A hoodink and a redhead a hoodwink
and a redhead yeah sure like hoodwink the little red riding hood too many wires showing for that uh
sign just gonna say it oh i thought the wire was coming off the lightsabers that he fixed onto his
mickey ears he's doing too much you can't put lightsabers on your mickey no but he's clearly
he's clearly a star wars guy based on the photo that they showed of him back like with the two
lightsabers in his hand they really have a neon sign in their place that says blank in a redhead.
Yeah.
We're not sure.
Well,
yeah,
we can,
we can't be too sure.
Like we're sure.
What do you think?
The most cringe part of the entire video is when she was nuzzling her head
into his neck while he was doing the ad read.
Why don't y'all do that with me?
Is that not a slur?
Why don't y'all do that with me during stamps?
Dave,
put your,
put your, put your put your closer to
put your head in my little soft spot in my neck yeah nuzzle up in there playboy is that is that
word okay to say out loud i don't say it i don't know who i would be offending so i just stay away
from it yeah that's what i do with most words i'm tired of censoring myself didn't say it bitch
dude drop a slur. Dave, how are you?
We need that.
We need that.
Ooh, drop a slur.
You got so excited.
That's so dumb.
This is a beautiful couple.
I agree.
I agree. I think I'm glad they're getting there.
It's a Disney world, dude.
My man's going to pull up to that slinky dog dash.
Oh, yeah, dude.
This was a paid spot.
They better have gotten the bag for this because it's absolutely embarrassing.
I don't think they did.
I don't think they got the bag from swingersonmain.com, dude.
Oh, Dylan pulls up and they're like, yeah, you're going to have to go to It's a Small World.
I pulled up and they're like, damn, I'm going to go to Under the Sea.
Why?
Why? Why?
Because down here, all the fish is happy.
Okay.
Will, you got that lobster costume.
You might be prime for this.
No comment.
Call me Seb Ass, Jen.
call me call me seb ass jen
i'm assuming pretty is trending because they just absolutely whooped iu last no the reason it's trending is because you probably look at a lot of purdue content on twitter and the
trending topics are all served to your very niche interest it's the difference between you and him
purdue did be the iu you gotta online, dude. The trending topics lately have just been so dialed into your niche interest
that it's not even valuable at this point.
But I will say, and I don't say this lightly,
I do think that there's been some app improvements with Twitter
since Elon has gotten on board.
And maybe it's because I've muted him,
so I just don't see his tweets popping up all the time.
His masterful gambits.
But I do think he's making some good changes to the app.
Okay.
Wow.
It's got my stamp of approval.
You know what else has my stamp of approval?
Stamps.com.
Oh.
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Randy, I'm going to have you queue up another video. and enter circling back, no space between it. Randy.
I'm going to have you queue up another video.
We don't need to watch the entirety of this video,
but have you guys seen the orange peeling challenge on Twitter?
Another one of the things that somehow slipped right past me.
You need to be more online, player.
I'm the most online person in here right now.
I'm living online right now, dog.
I've been seeing this a lot.
So there's been a new thing coming out uh i don't
know how this all began but uh it started it started to be a thing where um somebody in a
relationship will ask their partner to peel an orange for them and then you can base how much
your partner loves you based on their reaction to uh whether or not they're willing to peel an orange
okay so it's litmus test any other citrus you could peel for your lover like a lemon maybe
peeling a lemon's kind of weird no one does that well what if you're at a party
come on dylan you could your test could be hey will you cut this lime for me
i know put it in my beer yeah because i can't do that i don't fuck my dope off you have an allergy it's bad dog it's getting worse as i get older i'm gonna play one of the videos that went the
most viral because uh this uh this certain gentleman uh was not exactly the most down
with doing it are you ready for this a little worried randy's not ready for it he's reading
about purdue i know no i I found those people from the last thing.
It's Grant and Ash.
And I'm looking to see if it's a derogatory term.
I don't think it is.
Okay.
It's in their handle.
But here, let me.
I'll figure that out.
Let me throw this video for you.
They have a joint handle?
Yes.
They have like 280,000 on TikTok, 55K on Instagram.
They have a podcast too.
Oh my God.
Do you want to listen to their podcast?
You just ruined my day.
Bring them into the network?
I don't think so.
Might be a nice addition.
We're saving room for Hot Pie Media.
The whiny girls.
Yeah, I might get a...
Never mind.
God, I had like three glasses last night.
I was gone off that job.
When we're wine tasting, you can spit, but most of the time I swallow.
Did they really say that?
You're crazy for that one.
That's fucking dirty.
In the trailer, dude, that's how you know they're on Hinge, dog.
Dude, the whiny girls are different.
I know, they're different.
All right, I don't know what jersey she's wearing.
It kind of gives Florida Panthers, but is it?
I don't know.
I can't tell either.
Is this Michelle Branch? I don't know. I can't tell either. Is this Michelle Branch?
I don't know.
This is a very beautiful young lady,
so you'd assume that she would have a boyfriend
who puts her on a pedestal, right?
Looks like it's Shelby Wilfong.
I would hope so.
Well, I hope she's single after this video
because it didn't go well for her.
I really want an orange right now.
All right, try here, but I got you, buddy.
Here you go. You'll get me it?
No! But, like, I
really want it, but, like, I hate peeling
it. You hate peeling it? Yeah.
It just gets really messy. Okay.
And I have nails. It'll get, like, underneath them.
Tough luck, buddy.
Go ahead and do it. You're not gonna peel it
for me? Dude, okay. As if I don't do
enough. Seriously? Yeah.
I'm being for real.
Okay? You can't fucking peel this orange for me? Dude, okay. As if I don't do enough. Seriously? Yeah. I'm being for real. Okay? You can't fucking
peel this orange for me. Dude,
I ask you to do things all the time. I do everything.
I just did your fucking laundry. No.
And you can't peel this for me? Dude, come
on, man. Seriously?
No.
You can close it, Randy. Completely
normal to make content out of this all right here's the thing
she clearly has like a ring light on her like he knows that she's doing video maybe she just
looks that good now there's no way now this is spun off like a bunch of like other reaction
videos where people are doing this with their boyfriends but you can definitely tell when it's
like scripted like there was one guy that was like why do you just want an orange girl like
i'll go get you chick-fil-a right now i'll do this for you i'll do this for you and it's like scripted, like there was one guy that was like, why do you just want an orange girl? Like, I'll go get you Chick-fil-A right now.
I'll do this for you.
I'll do this for you. And it's like,
okay,
we're taking it a little too far.
Chick-fil-A is very different.
Yeah.
I just want some citrus.
Can you imagine if your girl asked you to peel an orange and like,
and you were just like,
what if we went to Chick-fil-A instead?
It's like,
well,
I just kind of want a little snacky citrus right now.
Yeah.
But now it's just like all these,
all these girls
just trying to make
their boyfriends look incredible.
I worry,
like, I don't know.
I don't,
I can't really,
I pick at my nails so much.
I don't really have good
hands for peeling an orange.
So if Sally did this video to me,
I'd probably be like,
I don't really know
if I'm good at that.
Like, you might want
to do it yourself
because you're just
going to do it better.
I'd peel an orange for a shorty.
If she was doing my laundry,
I think, I feel like it's a nice trade-off to peel an orange because doing laundry is not cool it stinks i low-key
like doing laundry all right low-key i'm different though so you are ma'am i heard just a cat i bet
you don't even do good laundry dude what does that mean i bet you're cleaning i bet your spin cycles
like all off and shit no my shit pretty standard you're probably washing all your like stuff on high heat and stuff like
what are you doing dog no it depends how dirty it is you can't do hot water you probably don't
even put your jeans in the freezer you know sometimes i get dirty what wait you're not
freezing your jeans i still don't know what what that does why are you freezing your jeans
because i don't know what it does it takes the odor out out of them, dude. The only time I actually wash my jeans
or put them in the freezer
is if I'm doing pants beers with the boys.
Yeah.
Then you kind of have to.
And even then.
I like being able to see
how old the jeans are
by how many layers of beer
there are on my pants.
It's like a tree when you cut it.
Right, yeah.
You understand what he's saying?
Have you guys done a pants beer
with a Vortex bottle yet?
It goes so fast.
No one actually puts their jeans
in the freezer though, right?
Yeah, people used to.
I got two pairs there right now.
There was a face of people doing it.
My buddy did it.
And it cleans them?
No, I mean it just, like, jeans,
apparently if jeans start to smell
and you don't want to wash them
because a lot of people
don't like washing their nice denim,
you can put them in the freezer
and it'll rid them of the scent it freezes the scent to
death it doesn't make me feel comfortable that people are out there just freezing the scent out
of their jeans and it's just still in there but i'm also not a jean guy so i can't really talk
old jean love jeans you never froze them though
you didn't have access to a freezer freezer no why didn't you
have a freezer yeah times are tough you fill in some rough times you never stepped into the freezer
him he never got locked in during the first night of the restaurant opening
old gene would appeal to an orange for somebody old gene oh he would appeal no he would have he
loved his orange tree i don't know if i would have trusted him he for somebody. Old Gene? Oh, he would have peeled an orange. No, he would have. He loved his orange tree, too.
I don't know if I would have trusted him.
He would sit under there for hours.
Oh, man.
It was hot in the shade, but he was happy.
Mm-hmm.
He was happy.
Old Gene.
Sure do miss him.
Could we take a little trip to Subway?
I'm not that hungry.
A $5 footlong is really $15 these days?
I saw a tweet the other day.
What's up with that?
I feel like they should rebrand it if that's the case.
Like $15 for a footlong sub just seems like a lot of money.
Why don't we just go to Jersey Mike's and get a normal size sub?
You know what I mean?
Subway seems like they've had some trouble over the last, I don't know,
pretty much since they left me off the schedule.
The whole Jared fiasco wasn't good for their image.
Nope.
Well, that went south after me, so.
You had nothing to do with it.
My hands are clean.
My hands don't smell like Asiago.
What's going on at Subway, Will?
Well, a Subway customer complained of numb lips after allegedly finding white powder on their
sandwich to the so i must ask the question drop a little nummy in there was there cocaine on this
subway sandwich a customer at a reno subway randy's going to reno soon uh alleged that he bit into a
sandwich and felt his lips go numb according to a report by the northern nevada public health
an agency responsible for health inspections uh this was at the South McCarran Boulevard location.
And yeah, he said there was a white powder on a sandwich that made the customer's lips
begin to feel numb.
If you see a white powder on your sandwich, why would you just eat that sandwich?
What if it was like a little powder from like your Monte Cristo?
Do they serve that at Subway?
No, but you never know. I mean, you could have brought it from home and sold it. What is a Monte Cristo. Do they serve that at Subway? No, but you never know.
I mean, you could have brought it from home and sold it.
What is a Monte Cristo?
It has powdered sugar on it.
It's a fried sandwich.
It's gross.
Oh, my man.
I don't know.
I've seen pics of them before, and I've been like, that looks bomb.
Randy, pull up Monte Cristo.
It's like the most unhealthy thing you can order.
Oh, I don't care, dude.
Pull up the Benning and Monte Cristo.
You think I care about health?
Yeah, you should.
I'm trying to keep you all healthy out here.
No, dude.
You're such a hypocrite with that.
In what way?
Yeah, there was something the other day.
They were like, dude, that's got all this sugar.
And you're like, oh, I don't care.
I'll treat myself every now and then.
Treat yourself to a Monte Cristo.
They don't look good.
Oh, my God.
You're telling me this doesn't look good.
No, no, no.
Buddy, the Bennegan's, I know Bennegan's isn't around anymore, but. Click one, Randy. Zoom in for a player one time. Give me No, no, no. Buddy, the Benegans, I know Benegans isn't around anymore,
but click one, Randy.
Zoom in for a player
one time.
Give me a gut shot, dude.
Jeez.
Hey, guys.
Where is it?
Where's the sandwich?
Ham and turkey
plus Swiss American cheese.
Oh, my God.
I mean, this looks delightful.
And it's fried
and it has powdered sugar
and there's a,
like a jelly dip.
Dylan, that's a good sandwich you know good you don't want to
eat it on a tuesday for lunch when you have to work that afternoon but it's kind of sound
this morning that's kind of saying the first two bites like this is pretty good and then you start
feeling like total shit every bite thereafter it might innovate like i want to kill myself stop i
don't know if it's can you imagine being a little hungover from one single hand grenade in
New Orleans and you wake up the next
day and you're like, damn, I need a power lunch
right now. Then you sit down at a restaurant and you can get
just a Monte Cristo like this.
Give me a double greasy
cheeseburger, man. Yeah, that's so
much better for you. That's so different than
the Monte Cristo. Shut up.
Well, the glaring lack of sugar.
Well, the person at the subway,
the person in charge of the subway
told inspectors on site
that the restaurant received
a new shipment of, quote,
Parmesan oregano bread topping mix,
which seemed to include
more Parmesan powder than normal.
Yeah, because it always makes you go numb.
So, like, did they think, like,
is the person trying to cover
for their people right now?
Yeah.
Just trying to chalk it up to being the garlic's powder?
They put Coke on this sandwich, I think.
Cocaine.
That's a waste of Coke.
Yeah, I agree.
No one's doing that.
There's not a guy back there like,
I want to do a little cocaine on this sandwich.
You salt bae the Coke onto the sandwich?
This is how you salt bae the Coke onto the sandwich.
That's right.
There you go.
Randy's doing an Instagram instagram so he missed what's crazy is that you learned that from like the original salt bae
people don't like him anymore i don't know if you've he started going downhill when he salted
your shows some say he was the he was like the guest at this at the golden knights game and then
he salted my shows it would be so cool if salt just appeared
out of his fingertips it just it comes out from behind his nails yeah i'm like i don't know if
i want these shows you just keep some in his pocket that would be so sick though yeah why
wouldn't you he's something yeah like you know how like gymnasts like have like the the powder
that they use for like the the bars and and stuff. He should just have that.
It could be a problem in Vegas when he gets pulled over.
They're searching him.
They're like, oh, what is this?
And he has to talk and come out of character.
Yeah.
Sir, it's actually salt.
I'm Salt Bae.
I don't know if you've seen the videos.
There's no way he talks like that.
He's like Turkish, isn't he?
I think he's Turkish.
So how do you think he talks?
Go ahead.
I'm going to do a Turk accent.
That's good, dude.
That's good.
Randy, you done posting or whatever? I was reading up on the term.
The term is twink, and I was figuring it all out.
It's not slur.
It's just a- it's a way to describe
a infeminate man that's in the gay community that's usually paired with a bear which is a
more larger hairy man yeah that seems like territory that i don't want to touch though
and i was on lgbt you're not gonna get canceled for saying twinker bear
yeah well i looked it up on lg LGBTQnation.com and they were saying –
You really have been doing it for 20 minutes.
They said it is maybe controversial, but it's just a way to describe a certain type of gay man.
I'm like, okay.
Within the gay community.
I mean, am I prejudiced because I don't want to say twink, but because I have a beard, I'm totally fine saying beard?
I guess I was confused if it referred to an actual like gay person
or just a small man well that's why i didn't want to touch it got a whole new list of questions
on the disneyland swingers yeah she said long-term boyfriend and he's going in their handle that he's
referring to himself as a twink so let the man be fluid let the man be fluid. Yeah, he's fluid. Let the man be fluid. He's bi, for sure. They're swingers.
Yeah, like, when you, if you're bi.
Swing.
If you're bi, swinging's, like, the best thing ever.
Oh, yeah.
Dude, for sure.
All options available.
For sure.
For sure.
Why not?
And now our little man's all grown up.
Minnie and Mickey Mouse, you know?
Swing, swing, swing.
That's right.
You know they have those ears on when they're going at it, too.
You know they do.
You think he gets those lightsabers out
the mickey ears stay on during sex
for sure
hey Randy do the lightsaber sound
that was pretty good
I don't know what you're doing
his was better
you sound like a really shitty Honda Civic
just kidding a reliable 2001 that doesn't exist not gently used 2001 Randy His was better. Yeah. You sound like a really shitty Honda Civic. Just kidding.
A reliable 2001.
That doesn't exist.
Just a not gently used 2001, Randy.
I'm not good at lightsaber sounds.
So wait, so did this guy get it tested?
Dude, they didn't do anything.
What a fucking narc.
I know.
Dude, you just got the gift of coke.
No, but you want it.
You're saying, well, you know, he's taken.
Yeah, you want it.
I respect the subway manager for protecting his people, being like, no, no, it was Parmesan.
We just got a bad batch of Parmy.
It was Parmesan.
I said it was Parmesan.
I could say, you know, as somebody who was a sandwich artist, we never dabbled in the white stuff.
We did dabble in having some Coronas in the freezer, though.
What about-
Not coronavirus, Corona beer.
Do you have any sticky mota back there?
This is, I don't think in that.
We weren't smoking weed.
We were still like drinking beers and skateboarding to work.
That's pretty sick, though.
This is a pretty cool time in my life.
Did you guys ever decide to serve any barbecue out of there?
More on that in a sec.
Hey, Dylan, can you do a little alert for the people out there?
Excuse me.
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Mine's going to be about parks.
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Mine's going to be about Parks, like I said.
I'm going to blow his mind with it.
It's going to be a rap song, too.
Parks, Parks, Central Park, Zilker zilker park parks no my son a good
song my son is named parks oh oh yeah yeah yeah i got one from the office right for the office
give me the first few notes of my girl will give me the bass
dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun I've got one ply.
That's all I had.
Oh.
I've got one ply. That's all you've written so far.
It's a play on the toilet paper that you bought at Office Max.
Office Max.
Just bought some staples.
The number one source.
More like office less.
Oh, Randy.
Wow.
I'm never doing the company a favor again by volunteering to go on an errand run and take one for the team.
Okay.
I know we've been down this road.
There's not a grocery store close to here.
I know.
Well, there's CVS and stuff.
But did you know that they had that when you went there?
No.
Or were you just taking a chance?
I was taking a chance.
Because I genuinely did not realize you could get TP at OfficeMax.
But it kind of makes sense.
Office supplies.
Office, you need toilet paper.
I apologize if anyone out there works at OfficeMax,
but OfficeMax for me is one of the most depressing places to stand in.
Just being in the four walls of OfficeMax just always makes me sad.
It's an awful place.
It's terrible.
And I just avoided it at all costs.
Is that where we went to find office furniture when we were trying to furnish the first office?
Yeah.
Yeah.
We struck out hugely.
We were just in there and the guy was showing us a desk and we're like, I don't know about
that.
That's a mid-ass desk.
And they're really expensive.
Not a good desk.
To stick on the topic of fast food, I think Subway is classified as fast food.
I think Chipotle is classified as fast food. I think Chipotle is classified as fast food.
Have you guys been on the Chipotle subreddit as of late?
No.
As a matter of fact, I have.
Nope.
Well, SniperBuzzcut, a user three days ago, posted a post that went viral.
He said, I think the employees at my local Chipotle are selling their own food.
And he goes on to say that his local Chipotle had mac and cheese ribs and mashed potatoes this week,
like an aluminum dish that they had in the serving area. They said it was a quote special
and that it happens sometimes. He says, I've never seen it before. I suspect the employees
are selling their own food out of Chipotle. He did note that the mac and cheese and ribs were
really good. They still did it in the bowl and people were getting it in burritos. He said,
I'm torn. Should I report this? Let it go.
It's kind of cool, but I feel like kind of not.
You ever put a rib in your burrito?
That'd be a first.
So then he goes out and does a bunch of updates because people are just taking this way too
far.
And a lot of his updates are just like, okay, like, please stop making me update you here.
I just thought it was weird that Chipotle had barbecue.
He said he's read through a ton of the comments.
There's a lot of hate from you, but also a lot of people pointing out the legitimate health concerns.
But it's just spiraled at this point.
He de facto narked.
He did nark.
But now the Reddit has taken things too far, and now a bunch of people are just doing joke posts.
Can I read you some of the headlines from the joke posts that people put up?
You may.
Someone put up, corporate called.
They're asking if we serve our own food.
So they launch into a whole explanation.
Someone said, I got a great portion
from my local Chipotle today.
I don't understand why people are always complaining on here.
And it's just a photo of a really good looking barbecue plate
that you would get in Austin, Texas.
Another one says, I'm never going to Chipotle again.
The portion sizes just keep getting worse and worse.
And that photo is just a plate of two small ribs on a plate of coleslaw. Then the final sizes just keep getting worse and worse and that photo is just a uh a plate of
two small ribs on a plate of coleslaw then the final one just says does your location charge for
slaw uh has actual chipotle chimed in on this i don't know and part of the reason i don't know
is because i can't tell if this guy's serious or not like i think he's serious but i also he he dips into parts where i'm like okay
he's doing a bit it's i when will sent this to me i i really wasn't sure and i felt like
i think it did trend the update i'm a i'm an update number three guy personally if you look
at the original post update three and four probably my faves but um i do like the fact that someone pointed out that in the in the uh
in the movie the founder starring uh michael keaton you love that that's exactly what i thought
he said uh someone pointed out that he had to get on to a franchisee for selling fried chicken from
his mcdonald's and that's not something that you know it's not a mcdonald's john's fair
nuggets weren't around then fair point somebody was just like you know, it's not a McDonald's John's. Fair point. The nuggets weren't around then. Fair point. Somebody was just like, you know what?
We can just, we'll just do this fried chicken.
Can't do that.
He's at an update three.
He said, I decided to go back tonight for dinner and they didn't have it.
There was a manager there.
So I asked him about it and they looked at me like I had two heads and said, this is
a Chipotle.
I said, yeah, I had great barbecue here earlier this week.
Is it going to become a full-time
thing and once they realized that i wasn't kidding they looked really surprised and acted kind of
weird and just said no that's not something i'll see again so i just got a bowl and went home we'll
see i guess i like how people didn't even bat an eye they're like yeah i'll take one of my burrito
i mean here's the thing if i go to if i go to chipotle which i will go to probably once a week
right down the street from us if i walk in there one day and I see that they have bomb-ass ribs on the menu, I might entertain it.
I'm not proud of myself for wanting to do that, but I might say, you know what?
Yeah, I'll do some of that pork on this bowl this time.
If this is real, and I don't think it is, one of the workers there absolutely brought their own shit to sell.
I think the manager's
covering for him again by saying like sir this is a chipotle yeah we don't do barbecue and mac
and cheese i think they had too much food for like a two-year-old's birthday and i well i don't want
to throw this food away let's just i'm gonna try to sell it at work tomorrow and they did but how
would you ring it up and put that money in your pocket you just fake ring it up yeah yeah you
could launder the money oh yeah if i'm there i'm like
oh yeah all the chipotle stuff is normal barbecues cash or venmo i used to valet for a company
and at one of the places like you don't always give like tickets but there's one one place we
did do tickets and some of the guys like oh we're out of tickets just you'll be card number like 48
and they would collect the money on their own because each ticket you had to like
turn in money for they were totally scamming the company.
I went to a hotel downtown last month and pulled up and the valet guy said, it's going to be X amount, but I'll give it to you for five bucks right now if you pay me right now.
And I looked at Sally and all I could think, I tried to say with my eyes to her, is this guy about to steal our car?
Like he's about to steal our car and just take off with like five bucks.
Paid him five bucks and it worked out like a charm.
Yeah.
Those places – I was also instructed that if you see someone stealing a car – we used to put – at one of the restaurants, we would put keys on the tire.
So it was like the easiest way to steal a car, right?
If you knew about it.
Yeah.
They said if you see someone stealing a car, just let them it's all covered by insurance don't even don't even try to
intervene super easy what if a car flips over and the person's in need and they need to get busted
out of that car are you gonna help them that's when dylan steps in to become a hero do you feel
like you need to do something a little more manly now that hulk hogan's just doing this on like
random days yeah what the fuck man is he wearing his nwo shirt he might have been the only difference is i'm not famous enough to get like news coverage like he is bullshit
i did really enjoy the idea of hulk hogan being the one like the first responder to a car crash
and just looking up from your car crash and being like am i dead i would think i was dead yeah if
hulk hogan was the one that pulled me out of a car i'd be like oh i died this is heaven when i
when i did dmt the first thing i saw was hulk hogan so i have to assume that's what happens what if you're
hanging upside down in a truck and then local podcaster dylan chivery walks up to you with
some scissors then what are you thinking i'm in hell okay i'm just kidding i don't mean that
it's more of a purgatory boy i'd be like how did he see this car crash when he was on his phone the
entire time did he cause it yeah did he just run me off the road when he car crash when he was on his phone the entire time? Did he cause it? Yeah. Did he just run me off the road when he was texting?
When he was double-hand texting on top of the wheel?
Oh, I think it's time.
I think it's time.
Wow, already, huh?
That's not the theme song I was trying to do.
Randy, take that one out, my friend!
It's time for This Weekend in Fun,
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slash circling. Dylan, what are you getting into
this weekend? I'll keep mine
brief because I don't really have much.
I have Parks Friday, Saturday.
Probably do a fun dinner somewhere
Friday and then Saturday I gotta find
plans. The weather, I don don't know what's gonna be cooperative once again so um i don't know man
i gotta find something to do with the little guy you're gonna do subway or chipotle maybe both
maybe hit both yeah okay to barbecue he'll probably want to do a sleepover with a friend
if i know if i know him i could think i do so you'll host i will are you the cool dad when you
host what's your vibe you know i'm cool what's your vibe joel colas joel colas until midnight
that's the cutoff yeah yeah smart i'm i'm pretty cool with it are you oh yeah are you yeah
yeah i can see you telling them turn off the playstation at 10 because you want to hop on
the sticks oh well they they can't play they can't hop on the sticks until 10.
Come on.
That's too late.
Come on.
Let the boys run.
He's 8.
I'm 8.
Yeah, that's it.
At 8, I was staying up watching Wild On.
I was watching Howard Stern.
Oh, man.
At 8, I was still under the covers with a flashlight
trying to read some dork book
just reading R.O. Stiles
Captain Underpants
or some shit
I never read Goosebumps
oh I did
isn't that weird
Parks loves those
Captain Underpants books
he's kind of outgrown them
they're kind of gas
I presented one
for a book report one time
teacher was not happy
remember the Hardy Boys
book series
yeah I didn't read that either
I got Parks that for Christmas
the Hardy Boys did you guys do you guys remember this is this is this might be terrible
question terrible radio there was a a series of sports books as a kid that were all just about
like random sports they had plots and everything do you remember this at all no This sounds like a scholastic play. I'm going to type in 1990s sports book for kids.
No, I do remember the like create 20 or like 100 crazy facts about football.
And it would just give you like wild Super Bowl facts and stuff.
This one, Matt Christopher books.
Do you guys remember Matt Christopher?
That looks very familiar.
Dude, they were gas.
I read The Hockey Machine like 50 times.
Return of the Home Run Kid.
Yeah, dude.
Look who's playing first base.
This kid just hit home runs.
Yeah.
Who is it?
I don't know.
He's just some kid.
Dude, Matt Christopher books, dude.
I don't remember these at all.
Yeah, these are new school covers.
I was on the...
See, Randy, if you go to second row, final one, that's the old school cover.
That's one that they had back in the 90s that was just absolute gas all the time that's sick yeah dude
undercover tailback yeah dude they had an oil painter do those covers they're like hey paint
this six-year-old just hitting the hole i i highly recommend the netflix captain underpants series
i'm not familiar with this it's uh. It definitely has a lot of adult humor,
not sexual,
as in fourth wall breaking
that you will laugh at,
and then a lot of fart and booger humor
that he would like.
Parks reads those books out loud,
and they're funny.
Yeah.
There's some good jokes.
The Netflix show is really good.
They're good.
I didn't even know they had a Netflix show.
Yeah.
Very much noted.
You don't freak with Captain Underpants, that's you expose yourself playboy yeah i don't know i'm not familiar maybe i need to what's that boy getting into this weekend
uh maybe get into some captain underpants humor because i want to be part of this um the only thing on the agenda,
Alyssa's got a, um,
bachelor,
ooh,
throat bubble.
Whoa.
That was really gross.
Sorry.
I couldn't,
I couldn't go with the bubble.
Uh,
she's got a bachelorette party.
Actually,
uh,
uh,
retail therapy zone.
Uh,
his,
his fiance's,
uh,
bachelorette events.
She will be participating in.
So mother-in-law is going to be events she will be participating in. So,
mother-in-law is going to be in town
and watch the kids.
And I'm going to maybe
try to sneak out
Saturday afternoon,
Saturday evening
for maybe a few Guinness,
a few stouts
at Kelly's Irish Pub
with Barrett and the boys,
whoever wants to go.
We were talking about it yesterday
when he was up here.
So, that's about it.
I'll be watching.
You know what?
Unlike other years when my team has frequently just absolutely pooed down
their leg, I'm going to continue to watch the NFL.
I'm going to watch because there's some great storylines.
And I'm rooting for that Bill's Lions Super Bowl.
That's where I'm going.
Okay.
So that's it.
Willie? I'm also rooting for
Bill's Lions.
I'm going to Nashville
this weekend. I have a wedding. It's a
family wedding. I've only been to
Nashville once before. It was also for a
wedding, so I didn't really get to spread my wings in that city.
I think I'm going to get to spread them even less this time.
I have one
single meal lined up that I know I'm doing.
You ever heard of a restaurant called Husk?
Nope.
Pretty famous restaurant.
I've eaten at the one in Charleston.
Had a good time.
I ate at the one in Nashville one time during a wedding.
And one of the gentlemen that ate dinner with us brought a Tinder date that he had met that night.
And so I'm looking forward to this experience a little bit more.
That's one of my favorite Will stories.
Dude, I love that.
Absolutely insane.
We go to the – I don't feel bad telling the story because I don't know who –
I met this guy that night and the entirety of our relationship was from that night.
I've never met him since.
But we show up at this nice restaurant and they messed up our reservation,
so we had to wait about an hour and a half.
And suddenly we get
this couple added to our table and i don't think anything of it because i was like whatever this
is just a random person that's latching on for the wedding and he shows up with a tinder date
and they sit down at our table and none of us have any idea what's going on like how do you how do
you confront this first time they had met yes like he landed he landed in nashville got on tinder
said do you want to go on a date tonight?
And then he brought her to like a Michelin star level restaurant.
This is more egregious than Dan.
Insane behavior.
More egregious than Dan bringing his girlfriend who was not invited to a wedding.
We told him that we weren't going to split the meals between all the guy's credit cards
and that like he needed to cover her meal because we're not paying for his Tinder dates meal.
And it started like a whole argument that escalated to the point where I ran out of the restaurant.
That guy's in the wrong.
You can't be more in the wrong than that.
I know, but it's kind of frat.
It is.
Well, I need you to try the 24-month Bob Woods Country Ham Soft Rolls Horseradish Pickle Pecan.
So I'll host a vote right now.
I am in my pescatarian phase right now.
Uh, I do not plan on eating any meat, uh, for a little bit, but I do think it's worth breaking
for opportunities like this. Do you think that I should, do you think I should break for this
restaurant? I'm looking at all the appetizers and I'm like, I don't want to skip some of these apps.
I mean, you're only, it looks like you're only, you got two options. You got the Gulf swordfish
and you got the buck snort trout.
And I'm a big buck snort trout guy, but.
Buck snort trout.
But.
What are they saying?
It's important to that buck.
Snort a few things if it's a few bucks.
Bear Creek beef sounds really good.
You got to try that.
You got to just break it, dude.
You said this is a Michelin restaurant?
Yeah.
I don't know if it's actually got a Michi.
It's got a James Beard award.
I know that. Jimmy B, he's out restaurant yeah i don't know if it's actually got a mishy it's got a james beard award i know that jimmy b he's out there i don't know we'll have a lot of success at old miss no
jackson dart
might smoke a dart this weekend oh i might smoke one too dude let's smoke something this weekend
you know if brett lands a deal we've been talking about, we've got to smoke those cigs.
Yeah, we did say that if Brett lands a certain deal
that we're going to smoke a cigarette at the office.
I will.
Can we just pass one around instead of each of us having to do one?
No, we're all going to burn one.
I can't wait to see Randy cough like a little bitch.
Did he tell you all about the one that he's got in the pipeline for next week?
Another cigarette?
Fender Stratocaster.
We might, in theory, all get Fender Strats
and potential
group lessons
is this a
are you pulling my leg here
yeah
that'd be cool
wouldn't it though
we all got to play guitar
we're also getting like
Steinway Grand Pianos
the lead singer
no calm down
the lead singer
and lead guitarist
of Touch a Tray
does guitar lessons
I love that
we're thinking about
just asking him to play
an entire,
like just play a solo
for an hour
and just going in there
and laying down.
You don't even play,
you just watch him
just nod your head.
Yep, yep.
Hey, so I want to learn
how to play this
hour-long solo.
Will you just play it right now
and I'll tell you
if it's the right one?
That's how you,
you learn by watching.
Yeah, I'm a visual learner.
Yeah, visual.
Yeah, that's just how it is.
That's how I do.
All right, guys, that's all she wrote today. That's how I do. All right, guys.
That's all she wrote today.
I had an absolute blast on this episode.
Sorry for missing Monday.
It's all right, man.
We should have announced it, though.
Yeah.
It's on you.
That's on you.
Dylan, dude, you got to tweet more, player.
What's your problem, dude?
You got to update.
Full disclosure, I thought we did mention it last week on one of the shows,
but I was also a little under last week on one of the shows,
but I was also a little under the weather on the weekend.
So this is definitely Dylan's fault.
We're not going to be recording for Christmas this year, probably July 4th. What else?
Some other stuff, Thanksgiving.
No, I will be recording for those days.
I'm different.
I'm covering a different cloth.
That's true. He's a dying breed they don't make
men like me anymore they don't bye you