Circling Back - Doing Ethical Cocaine at Brazilian Steakhouses
Episode Date: July 14, 2021The boys are buzzing, and no, it's not because they're doing ethically sourced cocaine. Shoot-around etiquette that became all-too-polarizing on Twitter, ethical cocaine that's taking over posh dinner... parties in England, Dave's new fajita take, and This Weekend in Fun. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (19:20) Shoot-Around Etiquette (39:07) Ethical Cocaine…? (53:10) Dave’s New Fajitas (1:04:11) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Vizzy: www.vizzyhardseltzer.com/washed Liquid IV: www.liquidiv.com (CIRCLINGBACK for 25% off) Truff: www.truff.com (STEAM for 15% off) Birddogs: www.birddogs.com --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
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All right, we're back.
Circling Back Podcast coming to you live from the Lodge,
presented by Vizzy Hard Seltzer,
the only hard seltzer with vitamin C and superfood acerola.
My name's Will DeFries, to my right, David Ruff.
Man, I'm just happy the office is still standing after that outflow boundary blew through yesterday.
Whew, that was something, man.
That was quite a time yesterday afternoon in Central Texas.
Didn't see it coming.
I mean, we didn't even get any rain over here.
It was just pure wind.
Dude, no rain in my crib. Really? Dry as a bone a bone over there that's good you always say you can't stand
the rain i can't stand the rain sorry dave i didn't mean to start over yeah okay yeah randy
start the hey man do you only buy black clothing now you just murdered out on the reg. Mix in like a blue. A red. To quote the infamous
Ja Rule, it's murder.
Really?
I'm wearing a blue hat
right now. Is it?
How do you guys feel recording with me for the first
time ever with a hat on? You've had a hat on.
There's no way this is the first time ever.
You've definitely had a hat on at some point. I will find video evidence somewhere.
Find video evidence. Find video evidence of the contrary.
Somebody will find video evidence somewhere. Nah. Nah. Pull the tape, Randy. You need
to get a Cat Pat's pizza hat. You're looking. She has a pizza hat. I don't know if I can afford
bae right now. Just bae on your head. You in a hat is like low-key flirty, though. I'm feeling it.
Get over here. I had a lot of people respond to our uh our announcement of
doing a meetup a lot of people responded regarding the uh the dress code of flirty
flirty casual meaning like what is flirty casual no just people being like love love that love the
dress code oh yeah i told people like if you don't have anything that's already casual, you can probably get away with, like, damp.
Soggy.
Something moist.
Right.
I don't know.
It's going to be tough.
I can't wait for the London meetup when it's just Bravcore everywhere.
We're not doing a London meetup.
Dude, Stone Island.
I feel like that's not in the Budge.
Isn't there a Pizza Corps?
Why can't it be in the Budge?
I just feel like it would be expensive to fly all of us to London.
Okay, just fly me over there.
I'll host the meetup. You also got to think we don't have a lot of listeners over there
that's actually a lie when i was in london uh before the the pandemic the worldwide global
pandemic i posted a photo and a backer said my apartment is in that photo okay so what are the
odds that guy will be at the meetup the meetup is me and that guy drinking guinness together
until one of us passes out at the bar.
There's a Scottish dude.
Scottish.
I don't know if he's actually Scottish or if he's just like an American working over there.
Those are different countries, by the way.
Just like low-key.
That's what I'm saying.
Okay.
But you do understand that Scotland is a part of the United Kingdom, right?
I'm very aware of that, yeah.
The UK, they call it.
You stupid dumbass.
It's a kingdom that is also united.
Right.
A lot of people don't know that they're not necessarily the most united.
Wow.
More on that later.
Brexit.
We're talking Brexit later.
That's what you're saying.
We got the Open this weekend, too, speaking of across the pond.
Don't call it the British Open.
Phil was saying that you can call it that.
Phil was, and then his mentions had many people explaining why you can't.
Seems like a real fun thing to do is go through those responses.
Yeah.
I'm glad that we're arguing about something online as trivial as the name of a golf tournament.
Today just feels different, really.
I don't know if it does.
It feels kind of like a traditional Wednesday in the studio to me.
It feels different.
It's probably the pressure change from that outflow boundary.
Something's different.
I'm more of an inflow boundary guy.
Really?
I'm more of an even flow.
What is an outflow boundary?
Or a gust front.
Well, from what I've seen, it's a storm scale or mesoscale boundary
separating thunderstorm-cooled air
from the surrounding air.
Let me put this differently.
Similar in effect to a cold front
with passage marked by a wind shift
and usually a drop in temperature
and a related pressure jump.
Dude, it's weird that you said that
because I was actually thinking the exact same thing.
One man's outflow is another man's gust front.
I just assumed we all knew that.
Yeah.
Hey, low-key, though, like July, though it's been pretty humid, not crazy hot.
I'll take a high of 90 in mid-July in Austin, Texas.
Yeah.
I think so.
I think so, David.
This is going to come back and bite us when it's like 116 in the middle of August.
It's not going to touch 116.
I don't know.
We're not in Death Valley.
Do you want to make a bet?
Do you want to see if it touches 116 in Austin between now?
What's the hottest temperature in August in Austin ever?
Ever?
It's probably like 112.
Okay, so four degrees less than what Will said.
Yeah.
Like historically.
We're talking records here. Oh, what are you, a fucking historian? Maybe I am, bitch. You're a fucking nerd, historically. We're talking records here.
Oh, what are you, a fucking historian?
Maybe I am, bitch.
You're a fucking nerd, dude.
Did you look this up before the podcast?
Am I right?
Yeah, it said 112.
Boston has soared its top temperature to 112 degrees on two occasions.
Once on September 5th, 2000.
And then again on August 28th, 2011.
A lot of people are like, oh, Dylan's probably like an amateur meteorologist.
But I'm just different, really. That's the thing. like, oh, Dylan's probably like an amateur meteorologist, but I'm just different, really.
That's the thing.
No, they'd say Dylan's an amateur.
Oh.
Or Dylan's into amateurs.
Don't say that.
What are you doing, dog?
Verified ones.
He's verified only.
Come on, dog.
What are y'all doing?
Remember you weren't verified on Twitter?
Literally everybody else was.
I wouldn't say literally everybody else was.
Literally the entire company was verified except for you.
That was such bullshit.
The intern got verified before you got verified.
She was one of the first, though, to be fair.
I know.
It was like you, then her, and then a bunch of losers.
Dude, I got it, and I was across the pond.
I was in the boot.
I was in Fianza when I got verified.
That's such good news.
Dude, that's so sick, man.
So when Dave got verified, he sent a screenshot of his Twitter profile to the group chat.
And I don't remember what you captioned it, but none of us really knew what you were talking about.
I think I had already assumed that you were verified.
And I was like, why is Dave just sending me a screenshot of his Twitter account?
You were just wiling over there.
Imagine being the last one.
I don't have to.
Dylan doesn't have to either.
Why, who? Because you were the last one. You don't have to imagine it doesn't have to either. Why who?
Because you were the last one.
You don't have to imagine it.
You were literally the last person.
Okay, fair.
I get it.
Look, I got there.
I crossed the finish line.
That's all that really matters.
I guess.
I think he doesn't get out to anybody these days.
I don't think they are verifying.
Instagram, though, that's the one you want.
You have to be goaded to do that.
That's the big leagues.
Yeah, who's you-know-what to have to be goaded to do that. That's the big leaks. Yeah, who's...
You know what, we have to you know what to get Instagram verification.
You got to say it, man.
I applied.
Whose email do we have to hit up?
Yeah.
Did y'all apply?
I did.
They're like, yeah, dude, totally.
And they just didn't do it.
That's what they said to me.
Did they breadcrumb you?
Yeah, we'll just keep in touch.
So they're honeydicking you. Yeah.'re breadcrumbing that's a funny one dude we've all been there been breadcrumbed
please keep an eye out that's our future segment we've all been there that seggy has legs
yeah it does uh let's get some programming notes out of the way go follow circling back
pot and wash media on the grom or on the TikTok or on the Twitter.
I don't care where you do it.
Just make sure you're doing it.
Go leave a review and five-star rating as well.
We've gotten one review since Monday.
Are you kidding?
I thought we'd have more, but just one from you guys.
Is it a good review?
Yeah, it was a guy saying that my voice reminded him of the dude from the Netflix series,
I think The Game or The Match or something like that.
It was the British one where soccer started.
Oh, I thought you were talking about the Andy Samberg tennis thing.
No.
Dude, charge it to The Game, man.
That'd be tight, though.
That was actually really funny.
Murderer!
No, it was – well, the dude in that show actually does look exactly like me,
so I wanted to tell him, like, yeah, it's not the voice.
It's just what I look like.
Is he super hot?
No, he just looks like me.
Exactly.
So he's absolutely scorching.
Dude, that hat is doing things for you.
Thank you.
I'm into it.
I appreciate that.
Yeah.
Go tell a friend about the podcast.
Or you can go to youtube.com slash washed media.
Yeah, we released an eight and a half minute video yesterday, a Cribs version of The Lodge. It might be the most impressive video we've over to YouTube.com slash Washed Media. Yeah, we released an eight-and-a-half-minute video yesterday,
a Cribs version of the Lodge.
It might be the most impressive video we've done to date.
People are asking, like, are interns, are they goaded on videos?
And maybe they are.
I don't know.
Dude, that was sick.
They did a great job.
Dylan, with how he's come out of the gate today,
with the backwards hat and the T-shirt that's comfort colors and a little too big.
I'm sleep deprived.
You look like such a 90s California high school kid.
Just like, yeah, bro, goaded.
What is it?
Fellow kids?
Super goaded.
You look like a teenager.
Yeah, I know.
Like a cool teen.
Look, I'm on one today.
I need sleep.
I haven't gotten much of it.
You're on one, but you also need sleep.
Yeah, dude.
Are you on booming loud?
Yeah, unfortunately, it's not really doing what it's supposed to.
It is a little bit.
I'm perked.
Man, I'm like at the point with my coffee intake.
I drink it so much, I don't even think it does anything.
Oh! Dude, that's so epic.
It's crazy that
I'm leaving town Friday, and a lot of people are like,
oh, Dylan, he's leaving town, he's gonna miss
Coffee Friday. Yeah, like I'm gonna
miss Coffee Friday. What are you talking about?
I literally asked you guys on Monday if
Coffee Friday was happening this week, and everyone acted like
it wasn't happening this week. No, no, no.
Why would you ask such a stupid-ass question?
It's like one of those things that just kind of happens
when all the vibes just click at the same time.
When the vibes perfectly align.
We're hoping it happens, but you can't force it, man.
It's like throwing a sick rager.
It's just catching that perfect wave.
Yeah, dude.
Have you ever seen Project X?
No, I actually haven't seen it.
I haven't either.
I think I should see it at some point.
It kind of scares me, honestly.
So when the vibes are just right.
Why have you seen it?
What Dave is trying to say.
He's trying to fucking take notes on what cool teens do.
I've seen Project X.
It's a wild ride.
Don't let Parks see it.
He's like murdering hookers in GTA Vice City.
I forgot about that.
He doesn't do that anymore.
He's through that phase.
He got his Nintendo Switch
and now he's just out.
What Dave was saying, Will,
is that when the vibes
are just right...
It's like an outflow boundary.
We drink coffee on Fridays.
That's the thing.
Okay, that's fine.
I drink coffee
like almost every day,
not to brag.
I don't know if that's a flex or not.
You think it's a coincidence
that the vibes were just right
when Will was not here?
I don't know.
I wasn't going to say that.
I think that's a little bit much.
Maybe that's not fair to say.
Do you ever go on vacation and then you're like,
fuck, I've got to get back soon before they realize that they can do this without me?
Yeah, dude.
It's like, fuck.
I'm already thinking.
I'm like, shit, I've got to return quickly.
I'm just like, I'm already thinking about it for next week.
I'm thinking about the episodes.
I hope they suck today and they miss me, but that's probably not what's happening.
You're checking the Reddit and Discord being like,
man, I hope they talk about how much they miss me but that's probably not what's happening you're like checking like the reddit and discord being like man i hope they talk about how much like how much
they miss me on the show like they need every time dude what are we doing today anyway dude i mean
i'm trying to get through the fucking announcements you want to let me do that uh we're also doing
happy hour live tonight shouts to us we are big. Welcome. Who's our special guest? I don't know. But we're doing Happy Hour Live tonight!
Is it Tim Howard?
No, I don't think he's...
Don't bring him on to Happy Hour Live. No, no, no.
He'll be underwhelmed. I don't trust the comment section
when it comes to him. He's not allowed to.
But yeah, Happy Hour Live.
Go to youtube.com slash watchmedia.
Go like and subscribe per Randy.
And make sure that you're in attendance.
It should be fun. Also, watchmedia.shop and the Patreon.
Tomorrow we're doing voicemails because we do Thursday voicemails now.
Also, yesterday we did Bachelorette, recapping everything.
Hey, Hunter, bye.
Dude, don't spoil it for people.
Damn, dude.
Why are you going to do our mans like that?
Is he your mans?
I don't know.
We've also got a backer meetup.
I do feel bad for him.
A whole squad about to congregate at Eisenhower's on Rainy Street in Austin, Texas on Saturday, July 31st at 3 p.m.
Wow.
You won't believe some of the people who are going to be there.
You won't believe it.
Imagine being moisture because you're going to get wicked by fabric.
Moisture has no chance.
Think about it.
by fabric.
Moisture has no chance.
Think about it.
If you're a backer and you're going to show up to this,
please bring a personal fan and just point it at me whenever we're hanging out.
Somebody's going to do that.
Or just wear your hottest rollback.
Your dopest rollback.
Bring the Weezing Cocks.
Should we ask Eisenhowers if they can get a big-ass fan there?
An industrial fan.
Just a big-ass fan.
A big-ass fan, David.
We need Wiesnkoks.
Someone's going to be like, oh, this is a bag of Wiesnkoks.
You guys want to do a joking line?
And then all of a sudden we're at dinner at 2 a.m. at Sammy's.
I'll nod my arm off.
How often are bruvs having to explain to cops,
like, no, it's just Wiesnkoks or whatever? I don't know how often the bruvs are to explain to cops like no, it's not it's just bees and cocks or whatever
I don't know how often the bruvs are having to explain I mean like stop doing this
You know what? I'll take the smell and salts at the meetups. If you bring smelling salts, I'll hit it with you
Yeah, somebody did that a couple years ago. I believe you did nose beers, too
Did you not you're asking if I did cocaine?
There's we have a cocaine segment. Should we just holster this?
Why was Smell and Sell such a prominent part of the last meetup?
Like, it was just people were passing around like it was candy.
I don't know, but didn't somebody, like, have it tossed over a fence or something?
Yeah, Fulton tossed it over the fence.
The fuck?
Dude, he went yard with it?
Yeah, dude.
He did.
How pissed were you that the Bachelorette was up against the Home Run Derby?
The Home Run Derby for you is pretty much a recommended tab at this point.
That's the game I played most as a child.
You cranked in the Home Run Derby?
Is what Will suggested.
Dylan would be watching Home Run Derby VHS recordings,
and his parents would come home, and he'd quickly turn off the TV.
What the?
No, I'm watching Full House.
What?
Full House.
What do you want?
What are you knocking on the door for?
Yeah, I was checking out Kimmy Gibbler.
Full House.
Remember her?
Gibb.
Why was she so annoying?
Win one for the Gibbler.
Why was she so annoying?
She stunk.
She just wasn't.
She had no vibes.
Have you seen her now? You will not believe what she looks like. Does she she so annoying? She stunk. She just wasn't. She had no vibes. Have you seen her now?
You will now believe
what she looks like.
Does she look good?
I don't know.
That's probably one of those
fake ads they serve
at the bottom of columns
on content websites.
Oh, yeah.
So you click it
thinking she has
like four boobs or something.
How to increase your penis
size by 12 inches
by tomorrow.
That doesn't sound safe.
Find out which star
is now working
in a Tom Thumb cash register.
Find out why this woman has four breasts.
What?
Sounds like a genetic defect.
Dude, I'm not going to lie.
She looks great.
Really?
She looks great.
Kimmy Gibbs?
What's her actual name?
Drop the at.
Andrea Barber.
Andrea Barber.
Andrea Butt Barber.
I'm not sure.
She looks great, though.
She looks like she's thriving.
Let's see about it. Let's go.
I mean, she looks happier than every other
child star I've ever seen.
She does look good.
Did she bribe the admissions
counselor at her
kid's school? She looks like she's about to
give me some unsolicited parenting advice at a
group dinner. I don't think she has UCLA-like bribe
money from her full house.
Maybe she does. No, I don't think so.
They were throwing a lot of cash around for those bribes.
I know.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah, not to mention they're in the Mossimo family.
I'm talking like six, seven figs.
Big boy stacks.
Yeah.
Did you have to bribe anybody to get parks into where he's at?
It's just a public school.
You slipped him a five?
I'd be so pissed if my parents paid that much money to get me into a college
instead of just giving me that fucking money to do something with it.
Damn.
Like, really?
I'd be on the rowing team now?
Damn.
I'm not built for the rowing team.
These shoulders cannot row.
Rowing's a great workout.
That's all I got on that.
The hot summer months are here, and we need to be proactive and keep our body fueled up and hydrated.
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Oh, you think I didn't get the same shit?
Well, you guys had gotten this flavor before, and I had never gotten it.
Oh, there's a new, new one, too.
What?
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Yeah, okay.
That's the one that I was talking about.
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See, I haven't even gotten strawberry yet.
I've had those for months, actually.
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Well, I had watermelon for the first time the other day, and I have to say, it hits
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Like watermelon.
Watermelon sugar. I don't think there's any sugar in it, though. Not a lot, at least. No, yeah, I had watermelon for the first time the other day, and I have to say, it's different. Like watermelon?
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I don't think there's any sugar in it, though.
Like, not a lot. No, yeah, I know.
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When we were flying back from Michigan, I was feeling hella dehydrated, because you know how you be on vacation sometimes.
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I should order a water, and I should take the liquid IV out of my backpack and put it in the water.
Look at the big brains on Will, man.
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Yeah.
You know I keep that thing on me at all times, whether I'm traveling,
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I think the biggest fan of Liquid IV might be Bae.
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I have a bunch of Liquid IV.
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She's a big fan.
Do you think that –
She stays strapped.
Do you think she might be staying with you solely because you have so much Liquid IV?
I considered that, and there might be something to it.
Hey, dude, that what they send us, that is for you only.
She has to continue purchasing it like a consumer.
True.
Really?
Yeah, that's in the agreement.
Okay.
All right.
Fair enough.
Sorry, bae.
Is she a big fan of cellular transport technology?
She's a huge fan of CTT.
Transporting cells?
Yeah.
Big CTT gal.
It's the technology that transports cells. It's very interesting fan of CTT. Transporting cells. Big CTT gal. It's the technology
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Oh, yeah.
I get it.
Live look at a cell transporting.
Why is the cell popping,
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Dylan's going to choke.
I took a sip of coffee
right as he hit that. Dude, he sip of coffee. Why did he hit that?
Dude, he hit that thing.
Dude, he hit it hard.
Our man went off.
I didn't know liquid IV had those movements.
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What if people skip through this read?
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I never know if it's a good or bad thing for the potter
when I lose my shit like that.
I think it's a good thing, Dylan.
Can you imagine skipping our ad reads at this point?
What are you doing?
Why would you do that?
Dude, Dave hit that thing.
Please don't let Liquid IV cancel
our ads.
They're in the Cribs video.
True. They're going to love that.
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Two sponsors of this episode.
Unbelievable.
You have to think that if we made a Mount Rushmore sponsor, Liquid IV is right there.
Yeah.
Right there.
They've been with us for a long time.
Right there.
Oh, yeah.
There was some polarizing stuff on the TL yesterday.
This was tearing people apart.
Dude, people were just freaking out.
Friendships ruined over this.
Let me ask you this.
When you are shooting hoops, which we do.
Both of you guys.
Will's no more.
They shooting.
Hoops, that is.
Oh, my hoops.
Will's got a web bounce pass.
Dylan claims to have the wettest J in Austin.
That's honestly just factual information.
A lot of questions about that, but that's
fine. Not going to argue.
Say it's y'all two in the gym and y'all are just shooting around.
Maybe you're going to go play pickup.
You're just working on your J.
Your buddy takes a shot.
He makes it. What do you do?
You're under the basket rebound and what do you do when he makes it?
You kick it right back. You give him his change, right?
You kick it right back. We call it a kicky
sometimes. Hey a kicky sometimes.
Hey, kicky.
It was like one time in NBA Jam in our tiny little – but it was fun.
It was a really fun time.
Does NBA Jam have just shoot-around mode where you can just shoot Js?
There should be that. It's called NBA Jam, not NBA shoot-around, you dumbass.
Dylan is the only person to rage quit a game.
I swear, didn't you turn it off?
The way you guys play NBA Jam is infuriating.
Dylan once turned off the entire system rather than allowing me to see the statistics of the ass beating that I served to him.
All you guys do is just hit threes.
It's NBA Jam.
Yeah, it's the new NBA, dude.
Welcome.
Analytics.
It's so annoying.
If you don't have range, then get out of here.
It's so annoying.
Dylan just wants to run low post game and NBA Jam and just hit layups.
You guys aren't clinical enough in your NBA Jam.
How awful is rebounding in that game?
It's tough.
Like, don't even try.
It's tough.
If your depth perception is off, NBA Jam is not the game for you.
Oh, let me jump up and grab this board.
Oh, it goes right through my chest and I can't grab it.
Why'd it go through my chest?
That's the question we all have, David.
Okay, so let's say your buddy hits it.
You kick it back out to him, a kicky, as you would refer to it.
I'll say give him his change.
He takes another shot.
He misses it.
You get the board.
What do you do?
That's my rock.
What do you do, hot shot?
That's my rock.
What do you do?
I'm bouncing out to three.
It's my turn to hit one.
So you're going out to take a three?
Yeah.
Or just wherever you want to do it. That's how it's always been that I've known, and I used to out to three. It's my turn to hit one. So you're going out to take a three? Yeah. Or just wherever you want to do it.
It's how it's always been that I've known.
And, you know, I used to ball a lot.
Ball is life.
I don't know if that's right.
Oh, I used to.
Yeah.
Okay.
Well, a lot of people are saying that the other school of thought,
you grab that board, your man just missed it,
you grab the board, you bring it down.
You hit it to him for a layup. And then it. You grab the board. You bring it down. You hit it to him
for a layup.
And then it's your ball.
As a guy who played basketball
for, I mean, geez,
pretty much
third grade
through eighth grade.
Ninth grade.
B-team, but it was just a it was a height thing
there's a b team guy b team wow okay keep going dude my school produced greg ostertag and brian
boddicker two of the most goaded you could have been dishing them the rock that's all they're
significantly older than me ostertag's like 20 years older than me. Alumni game.
Alumni game.
It's just me bringing it up, throwing the one up.
Anyway, I never played that.
I never kicked it back to him for a layup.
I never, like, you know.
And I don't really know what the point is.
If I'm shooting around and I'm under the hoop and somebody misses,
there's no way that I'm kicking it to anybody.
I'm taking that rebound and I'm borderline doing the thing where you wrap your arms around the ball
and start swinging your elbows around someone else.
Even though it's just you and your buddy.
Yeah.
I do understand the thought behind it.
Because it's like instead of you taking the rock back out it's like let him hit you with that
pass because you give it to him he takes the rack i get it he's got the ball and then you're set up
out the three and he'll just dish it to you and you hit one so it's like it's like a transitional
thing but that time you spend running out to the or walking out to the three-point line or wherever
you're gonna hit the j from could be be him working on his layup game.
But why?
This isn't some rule that we're all supposed to know.
That's what I don't get.
It's not written.
I don't understand why people are so like. This might be a new school thing.
You know I'm old school.
What, these kids?
I got to be selfish with the rock, dude.
I'm all about ball security.
What do you mean?
You're the bounce pass guy.
You can't be selfish with that rock.
Yeah, but you know my bounce passes
are hitting you
straight in your hands
every single time.
This might be a good time
to work on your bounce pass.
No, I'm not bounce passing
it out to my boy
while we're playing
shoot around.
It's just not happening.
Have you ever played
with somebody who
you drain one
and he just takes it
and he just starts
doing his own thing with it?
Like, I got the ball
because I'll continue to
do what I want to do.
That's major narc box. That's you got to beat that kid's ass. That means you're police. Like, I got the ball. I guess I'll continue to – I'll do what I want to do. That's major narc box.
That's – you got to beat that kid's ass.
That means you're police.
You got to beat him up.
I mean, I don't know where I was taken in the Wash Media basketball draft,
but I assume it was like –
Dude, you were totally first round.
Fifth round or something like that.
Like, for those wondering out there, yes,
I can confirm that I did make the A team in seventh grade.
Like, that's just what happened.
Dude, I heard y'all were sick.
I heard y'all were sick.
I didn't play any minutes because I quit because we had to wear jock straps and stuff.
I figured I'd just go ski instead.
You mean to wear a jock strap for basketball?
Dude, yeah.
How aggressive is that?
Oh, my gosh.
Our science teacher was the coach.
He was a hard ass, which I respected.
But at the same time, I was like, dude, can't we just wear something besides jock straps?
Dude, catch me never wearing a jock strap.
Those things are terrible.
I think my coach was, or one of the coaches was my science teacher as well.
And I remember specifically, there was like a week of class where,
I don't know if he was just deviating from whatever lesson plan he had, but he just had this book, and it was like 10,000 wild facts about science or something.
And he would open it up and be like,
do you know that there's enough blood vessels in your body to wrap around the world twice?
And everybody's like, oh, fuck, that's dope, coach.
And then he'd be like, do you know there's enough wire in the Golden Gate Bridge to wrap around the world three times?
Like, whoa, dude, coach, you got all the science, man.
And that was our lesson that week.
It was really, really informative.
Same guy that used to have me burn uh cds for him on the cassettes
and then would never like compensate me and it got to the point to where like he would ask for
something i'd be like oh coach i don't i don't have the fastball cd remember fastball austin zone
he'd be like oh man disappointing me rough and i was like fuck so i went out you were his music
plug i bought it just to burn for him yeah Yeah. What? I know.
You were his little Bernie boy.
I was his little Bernie bro.
You were a burn bitch.
Dave, I'm going to save people the time to fact check Dave,
but Dave was right about the Golden Gate Bridge.
Is that true?
Yeah, you take all the... Is it three times?
Yeah, three times.
80,000 miles, dude.
You know they never stopped painting it?
I still think that...
Right now it's getting right now i think someone
in the world needs to sacrifice themselves so that we can wrap their stuff around the world
see what it does you want you wanted to test that theory yeah you want someone to donate
their blood vessels so we can wrap it around the earth correct i don't what method would we
how do we know that that's a thing unless we actually do it remember in like the 80s when
everyone held hands across america or whatever i think it's How do we know that that's a thing unless we actually do it? Remember in the 80s when everyone held hands across America or whatever?
I think it's time that we just string someone's blood vessels around everything.
Was that an AIDS thing?
I think so.
AIDS awareness?
I think so.
Was that an AIDS thing?
Did people actually do that?
Were people actually going outside and holding hands across America?
Not me.
I don't think they actually connected all the way.
I feel like you'd get to some places and it'd be like, yo, I can't reach.
I was in the lab working on my game.
You would have been sprinting through people's hands doing Red Rovers.
I heard that.
Red Rovers dangerous.
They played telephone from one end to the other, from one coast to the next.
Yeah, I'm over here, Shane.
Apparently that message was perfect when it got to the other side.
What was the message?
I don't know.
Dude, remember that time at Matt's alabancho we were playing telephone
with people we decided to play a game of telephone and it got to dylan at the end and he was like
who the fuck changed it that's not how it started who fucking changed it what a stupid game
i can see dave being the one that changed it in school just there's an important message
oh yeah game though what uh you know messages don't
believe everything you hear like what message don't believe the hype lost in translation i
don't think they play it for the moral story no i i think i think that's why i know that's
my point you're playing to hear like what it's like how bad a rumor yeah exactly you're playing
it so you can make like a cum joke and then laugh when it all comes like it's like you guys hear
this trick dave like uh you know he was in the gym and he hit like 10 three-pointers in a row or something.
And then like by the time we get the story changed and it's like Dave wouldn't kick it back out to me.
Like, it just changes, you know what I'm saying?
Dude, don't even suggest that.
Like, honestly, that's not even funny.
Like, I hit a J and then Dave just kept the rock.
No one's bouncing it back out to their boys so we can drive to the lane and do a clinical layup.
That's just lame.
It's like a Gen Z thing, I'm telling you.
These kids, dude, they're soft.
These kids.
These kids.
You see these NBA refs?
Or do you see the FIBA refs or whatever?
Is that how you pronounce it?
FIBA?
Sure.
You're really asking us?
Yeah, you guys see these guys?
No.
You're fucking not calling anything out there.
Wow.
International ball, baby.
Right.
Sorry.
Right.
I'm thinking about getting a Nigeria.
Did they lose last night to Australia?
I don't know if they did, but they're going viral with every tweet they do right now.
Whoever's running the Nigeria basketball account is just absolutely killing it.
Australia. Wow. Wow. Australia, wow.
Australia,
okay, they won by 42 points.
Aussie team's a problem. Patty Mills.
Patty Mills, your mom's best friend.
Because the name or like...
He's actually friends with my mom. Think about his name, dude.
Patty Mills. Like she makes a dope
casserole and lives down the street. Oh, yeah.
You know what I'm saying? Did you talk to him when you were courtside?
He wasn't on the team then.
I hear that the Australian team's a problem in the paint.
They just kick it down under.
Wow, Dylan Ball is what they call that.
That's a didgeridoo.
What's it called?
Didgeridoo.
Didgeridoo.
You ever played one before?
Why would I have ever been in a position to play one? My buddy in high school bought one. You never played a didgeridoo. Didgeridoo. You ever played one before? Why would I have ever been in a position to play one?
My buddy in high school bought one.
You never played a didgeridoo?
What?
I had a buddy who bought a boomerang.
What are you doing with your childhood?
We could never throw it, right?
I can do it.
My dad had a boomerang as a kid.
It was just in our house.
Time out.
We decided to take it out one time, and it did not work.
Do you want me to tell you how to do it?
I don't want you to tell me.
I want you to show the world.
People throw it the wrong way.
Want me to tell you? I would watch really want you to tell me. I want you to show the world. People throw it the wrong way. Want me to tell you?
I would watch a YouTube video
before I attempted.
So you throw it with the V-side
facing the way you're throwing,
the open side, right?
Yeah, I know what the V-side is.
I didn't know we were going to get
sleep-deprived Dylan
explaining the ranks to us.
You throw it vertically,
straight up and down.
You throw it like this.
And you got to throw it,
if there's a breeze,
throw it into the breeze. Like into the frontal boundary? You throw it right into that and you've got to throw it – if there's a breeze, throw it into the breeze.
Like into the frontal boundary?
You throw it right into that frontal – right into it.
Yeah.
Anyway.
So if there's a breeze –
You've got to put some heat on it.
What if there's a freeze?
Like Will couldn't do it.
I could do it, dude.
You've got to put some heat behind it, Dave.
And it'll –
Now, everyone knows that I'm a short-distance thrower.
I don't throw long distance, but short distance, it's over.
You're a short-distance king.
Is it true that it was a hunting tool?
Nah.
No one really knows.
Can you imagine being an animal and seeing a dude hunting you with a boomerang?
I'd feel so confident in myself.
Dude, let's get a company boomerang.
Okay.
And just throw it.
Dylan's old ass is still doing boomerangs on Instagram.
Okay, boomer.
Oh, man.
Remember Chad showed us the bounce thing?
Dude, Chad's knowledge of small things within the phone are just crazy.
He's goaded.
So if you take a live photo, you can make the image bounce,
and it creates a boomerang, but the clarity is much greater and smoother.
It's dope.
I've done it, dog.
When Instagram introduces something new, like a new feature,
do they bring out a handful of elite Instagrammers
and show them how to do this stuff, like Chad?
If so, Chad's got to be on that list.
What is he doing over there?
It's crazy.
Him and the dudes just cooking up.
He went to the ESPYs.
Perfection.
Did you go to the ESPYs?
Because Chad did.
I didn't go to the ESPYs, David.
Did we get invited?
I don't believe we did.
Did they not see our Donaholt punting video?
Hey, when are we going to get notoriety and get an invite to that podcasting award show,
whatever the hell it's called?
Or is it?
Maybe it's not a show, but it's just a thing they dish out.
I don't know.
They didn't get us on that list, dog.
Didn't you say you wanted to go to the AVN Awards in Las Vegas this year?
No, I didn't say that.
Which one's the AVN?
I'm not sure.
Dave goes every year, man.
No, I'm on that AVON.
Wow.
Remember that?
That's a throwback.
Yes, it is.
That's a throwback.
The Ravion one.
That was a fun
six months how do we i don't even know what we're doing with this segment i don't know
boomerangs and what's what's the one that randy would probably go to comic con
oh absolutely are you kidding dressed as like a transformer or some shit
one of those like actually transforms like kids were on halloween i mean like he like put
spent thousands of dollars on this thing like hours and hours of crafting
and just got it got a couple grams of people like oh it looks really good man
i'm gonna go get uh jack white's autograph or whoever it would be. Jay and Silent Bob's autograph.
They do Comic Con, right?
Probably have.
I don't know, Dave.
They've definitely done it.
Were you into Jay and Silent Bob?
No.
There was a crew that was
in high school.
Yeah, like, I mean,
I watched like Mallrats and stuff,
but like we weren't like,
we weren't obsessive over it.
There were people who swore by it.
And I remember like
sitting down with them
and these people part, I'm not gonna narc but they were they were smoking
some good yeah and at this time i wasn't really that into it so i was like i'll watch the movie
with them i was too young mall rats you would have thought they were watching like uh the like
john leguizamo's classic the pest the way they were laughing i couldn't get behind it because
that one dude would never he would never talk well yeah that was the whole time dude yeah he was just silent is that the greatest con in like anything
just being like no i'm a silent guy i don't have to memorize any lines it's great so easy
i could do that why don't you try
have you considered taking on that role i'm on a podcast man that doesn't it's not gonna work
dave and silent dill you could be like the guy in the Mighty Mighty
Boston who doesn't sing, he just dances.
You understand
that reference, right? Have you ever had to knock on wood?
Excuse me? Anytime he's at the plate.
I don't get the ref.
Please. He was whiffing.
Oh, wow.
Instead of bringing fans to the
meetup, just let Dylan have a bat and be around me.
I'll be catching air everywhere.
He's saying that you miss the ball when you swing.
What are you doing, man?
Yeah.
I struck out a few times.
That's okay.
I had a season where I never struck out.
True story.
And you also never got in a bat.
What was your slugging percentage?
I got in bats the whole time, dude.
What was your slugging percentage your senior year in high school?
I don't know.
What was your wins above replacement?
But I was on the list of top batting averages in the state for a while.
What was your war?
A little slump.
What was your war?
I don't know.
That wasn't a thing back then.
It was not above zero.
So you guys weren't taking analytics seriously back then?
I was the gap-to-gap guy.
Everybody knows that about me.
They wanted me to play, but they were like,
dude, we need you in the analytics department more.
So that's how we made that run to state that year.
Really?
Yeah, I was like, no, we've got to rethink how we're doing this entire team.
Like, we need to put some guys in there who are cheap, high school players,
and guys who just get on base.
That was kind of my whole philosophy.
We ended up taking state.
First I've heard of this. They gave me a ring a ring i got the ring i don't wear it that's something i would have known about you
before today yep they call it davy ball so you're an you're an instrumental piece in your your high
school don't say instrumental yeah i don't know about that winning a state championship the
dungaree do is it the dungaree-doo?
Didgeridoo.
Didgeridoo.
I'm sorry.
I'm thinking of dunkaroos.
Dunkaroos.
They're lots of fun for me to use.
Dunkaroos are very much not a didgeridoo, okay?
They're very different things.
Has the homie ever had a dunkaroo?
I don't know.
There's no way that you've given him one.
I haven't.
I haven't.
That's true.
That's facts.
Has he ever had truff?
Not yet. He's not a big hot sauce. Has he ever had truff? Not yet.
He's not a big hot sauce guy?
No.
He'll get there.
Yeah.
You know.
So I was actually at the supermarket the other day, and I was like, man, I could use some
hot sauce.
I'm going to go get some hot sauce.
And I was going.
I was looking.
I was like, man, I got all these bootleg hot sauces here.
And as my eyes started going up on the shelves, on the top shelf, because this is top shelf
stuff.
Was top shelf a mega trough scene?
It was a mega trough scene up there. Let's go.
Dude, it's awesome. This stuff combines
black truffles, ripe chili, savory spices
and organic agave nectar.
Get out of here with your non-organic
agave nectar. It's so nectar.
It's so nectar, dude.
If you guys, like, you don't even have to, like,
yes, this stuff has truffle in it, but it's not
an overwhelming amount of truffle. A lot of people overdo in it, but it's not an overwhelming amount of truffle.
A lot of people overdo their truffle.
It's a tasteful amount of truffle.
It's perfect.
Perfectly truffed.
And they have different flavors, too.
Like, it's just they have the hotter sauce, the hot sauce.
They got it all.
I kind of like the hotter sauce.
I recently have switched to the hotter.
I'm just getting crazy at home.
Ever since I moved down to Texas, like, my tolerance for the heat and food has gone way up.
Yeah.
You got an iron stomach.
They have the white truff hot sauce.
It's infused with a rare and decadent white truffle.
I think the pig from that movie with Nick Cage,
I think it's the one that found this truffle, actually.
Are you sure?
I'm not sure, but I'm thinking about it.
I just want to go home and cook up some eggs and just throw the truff on there.
Yeah, you want to know how popular this stuff is?
I'm going to town on it.
I'm weird about eggs, and I never put anything other than salt and pepper, but I've been
adding the truff on y'all's recommendation.
You hit them with a little truff.
Yeah, I hit them with it.
Dude, they're the number one best-selling sauce on Amazon.
Am I supposed to act surprised?
And whole foods.
I don't get it.
What do you want from me?
You ever heard of Oprah?
No.
Have you ever heard of Oprah?
Winfrey?
Well, this was on Her Favorite Things twice.
Have you ever seen Her Favorite Things?
It's the most lit episode of any talk show ever.
They made it twice?
These things are her favorite.
She said, and I quote,
there's no one I've given it to that hasn't loved it.
That's Oprah.
Big facts.
No cap.
Oprah knows good things, man.
You can get 15% off site-wide plus free shipping
with promo code STEAM at truff.com.
That's 15% off everything at truff.
T-R-U-F-F.
F as in fantastic.
Dot com.
Promo code STEAM.
I might have to make something tonight with hot sauce.
I need to start using that F as in fantastic.
Because when I'm on the phone and I'm giving my last name, I do two Fs, F as in Frank.
That's what everyone does for their F, yeah.
But F as in fantastic is so cocky.
I need to do that.
Why don't you just start doing it?
Yeah, I'm going to start mixing in other stuff.
I always do F as in Frank.
F as in fun.
F as in fun.
You guys hear about this new woke Coke?
Dylan probably has.
No, actually.
It's probably better than the shit you've been doing.
What are you doing?
No, you don't do Coke, do you?
No.
You might want to start after this news that I'm about to break.
Is it ethical Coke?
It's ethical Coke.
Is it the key to some 112-year-old's longevity?
Yeah.
I haven't slept in 80 years.
I actually died 20 years ago when I started doing ethical coke,
and I've been alive ever since.
I can't stop living.
Per the New Zealand Herald,
Brits looking to ease their conscience over their involvement in bloody drug wars overseas
are now being targeted by cynical dealers selling them what they claim is ethically sourced cocaine.
I want to know more.
Bloody drug war.
It's cheap, too.
It's only $435 a gram.
How much does coke cost?
Does anyone know?
I don't know.
No frame of reference.
I have no clue how much cocaine costs.
I believe it is known as a more expensive street drug.
Yeah.
What does ethically sourced mean?
It's free range.
In this context.
It's cage-free coke.
Like the cocaine is not kept in a cage.
It's not tortured.
It's not factory-farmed cocaine.
I think that's what they're saying.
Well, someone, some Colombian aid worker in Bibiana, Velota, she said, I've never heard
of woke coke, but I can tell you no one in Colombia produces cocaine ethically.
I mean, she sounds like she's kind of a dampener on this, but I don't really know if I –
Yeah, when I think of Colombian cocaine, I don't – it's not like a pretty image that enters the brain.
It's a –
Well, apparently in the U.K. there's very high demand for the so-called woke coke at posh dinner parties across the U.K.
This isn't Wiesenkoks.
It's just straight up nose beers, right?
Yeah.
You'll probably never even try this because you haven't been to a posh dinner party in your entire fucking life.
Oh, have you met his new friends?
Come on, dog.
This is true.
Are they your new friends?
Because are they just getting like organic non-GMO coke from Columbia?
They're so posh.
All they get together is just mad posh.
Lil' Posh over here.
Lil' Posh.
Greg Posovich.
That's almost there.
Is the Spurs tie-in?
He's going to be in San Antonio this weekend.
Don't ruin his weekend in fun form.
Wait, so how – what are they – what –
Like, why is it –
What are they doing?
What's like the – what boxes do you have to check for it to be considered this?
And, like, who's regulating this?
Dude, it's truly hard to say.
I don't know if there's anyone – I don't know if there's anyone actually regulating this.
I don't think there is a regulating agency.
Everyone quoting this article is pretty much saying that it's total bullshit.
No, no, no.
Because in October, someone claimed that in Chiswick,
I don't know where Chiswick is, but it sounds very British to me.
That sounds British. It says everyone's got
woke coke. It's from sustainable sources in South
America. They're like, hi, darling. I've got
woke coke. It's all PC, 200 pounds
a gram. 200 pounds
is a lot. Do people actually talk like that?
Like, I'm looking for pc
coke they've got pc meaning politically correct this said they've got their vegan food organic
wine and their woke coke and a spliff going it sounds like a fucking situation a spliff they
just threw a spliff in possibly that spliff and i'm fine i feel like this is there's like eight
people who have ever had this thought and then like one of them has a friend who got some job
right what what is the source daily daily? This has got Daily Mail on it.
I've seen this on New York Post.
Now there's New Zealand Herald and then one other place.
Amazing Vice doesn't have a write-up on this at this point.
Dude, shout out to Herald in New Zealand for having like a magazine named after you.
It's just him.
It's just some guy named Herald writing stories.
I don't hate the idea of that.
He writes everything.
Are you more likely to do coke if it's sustainable?
More likely, sure.
But the chances of me doing it go from zero to 1%. They do this with diamonds.
Ethically sourced diamonds.
I just shine bright like one.
Okay.
But I'm just saying.
But diamonds are not illegal.
Diamonds are forever. Blood diamond? You're talking about blood diamonds? Yeah, very obviously that's what I'm just saying. But diamonds are not illegal. Diamonds are forever.
Blood diamond?
You're talking about blood diamonds?
Yeah, very obviously that's what I'm talking about.
Okay.
Y'all seen that movie recently?
Never actually seen it ever. It's been like 12 years.
Are you serious?
Dude, you got to see it.
Good flick, dude.
Is that Leo?
It's awesome.
Leo's in that, right?
Yeah.
Fancy diamond.
Bloody diamonds?
No, it doesn't work.
It's a different movie. It doesn't work. It's a different movie.
It doesn't work.
I mine your diamonds.
I'm not an expert in South African accents,
although I wish I was because I think it's a dope accent,
but Leo has a South African accent in this movie.
That's just sex right there, man.
How old do you think Leo's current girlfriend is?
23.
Right.
That's the right answer.
Or younger.
Yeah. What is the age range? He's not doing like sub 20. He dumps him at 23. Right. That's the right answer. Or younger. Yeah. What is the
age range? He's not doing like sub-20.
He dumps in at 23.
Is that a thing
too? I know we've talked about it,
but like... I think I saw a graph on it
recently, actually, and I was like, oh, that makes sense.
Any news?
We got any Leo Scorsese
joints coming out soon?
Kind of horny for one.
I think so, actually.
Do you want me to go to IMDb and make sure?
I'd love that, actually.
I think we do have one, actually.
If they push Top Gun one more time.
He's not in that, neither is Scorsese.
I'm going to absolutely lose it.
I'm looking forward to that movie for like two years now.
What if they just took Tom Cruise out and it's Leo?
I mean, I'm in still.
I would probably still see it.
See, I'm more annoyed that they keep pushing out Bond.
You see Thomas at Wimbledon just looking mad handsome up in the stands?
All right.
He's got four movies right now.
Actually, five movies.
They've announced Roosevelt where he's going to be Theodore Roosevelt.
You guys ever heard of him?
Mm-hmm.
Teddy.
Goes by Teddy.
He's also going to be in a TV series called The Devil in the White City.
He's Dr. H.H. Holmes in that.
Sick.
The Black Hand and Killer of the Flower Moon.
Also a movie called Don't Look Up.
I'm trying to find if any of these have a Scorsese vibe.
Black Hand sounds like a mafia movie.
It says it's an epic where a brilliant detective and the deadliest secret.
Secret society.
I'm terrible at reading right now.
I can't read.
I cannot read.
Is this police officer Joe Petrosino seeking justice against a ruthless Italian-American gang in New York?
I think it might be. I think New York? I think it might be.
I think it is.
I think it might be.
We don't have any information on the thing about who's directing it, unfortunately.
We just did a pop culture update.
Shine bright like a diamond.
Okay.
So, yeah.
Killers of the Flower Moon is going to be a Martin Scorsese joint starring DiCaprio.
You know it's going to be lit.
Oh, Marty S., huh?
They're just late.
Oh, yeah, they're boys.
Imagine getting in with Scorsese.
Sick.
Or did Scorsese get in with Leo?
That's a good question.
It's the classic chicken or the egg.
Well, you know all the Scorsese stuff behind the band Last Waltz.
I don't.
He directed the Last Waltz with the band.
Okay.
And in that, apparently there was a lot of cocaine being done.
I don't know if it was ethical cocaine to loop back.
You know, a different time.
It could have been a visa.
They weren't as ethical back then.
Apparently during Neil Young's part in the Last Waltz, they had to edit cocaine falling out of his nose.
I've heard that.
Not ideal.
Now that you mention it.
Apparently they also had a room set up in the back of the venue.
Why did they edit it?
Sorry.
I don't know.
It's Neil Young in the 70s.
We know he's doing cocaine.
If you think no one was doing cocaine at The Last Waltz.
I would be upset if they weren't doing cocaine.
Yeah.
Apparently they had a room in there.
I'm not kidding about this. Apparently they had a room in there. I'm not kidding about this.
Apparently they had a room in the back
that had noses on the wall
and they had music playing,
but it wasn't music.
It was just snort noises.
The hell?
That seems a little excessive.
How much do you like doing coke
that you just make a cocaine room?
That's just weird.
Cocaine.
Cocaine.
Cocaine.
The nose is like a body part i don't want um sculpted or prominently
displayed throughout my home or my club or whatever i'm you know i've always said when it
comes to noses i want things to come out of my nose not go into it you know what i mean like
snot you've always said that i've always said that unless it's a hair i don't really nobody
wants a big nose hair i don't say much about noses. Unless you're a COVID test, get out of my nose.
Those are not comfortable, man.
Did you ever do the cell phone where you had to administer to yourself?
No.
Did you?
No.
I had to do it at a drive-in testing place.
And the look on my face when she told me that I had to be the one that did it,
I had to have been just completely devastated.
Was it in a dumpster?
No, it was not.
Unfortunately, no.
I was going to a place that wasn't a dumpster.
I haven't been on South Mar lately. Have they gotten rid of the dumpsters out there? The dumpster? No, it was not. Unfortunately, no, I was going to a place that wasn't a dumpster. I haven't been on South Mar lately.
Have they gotten rid of the dumpsters out there?
The dumpster testing center is no more.
Damn.
So we can't call you a little dumpster anymore?
You still can.
A little dump truck?
Is there anything worse than just a rogue nose hair?
You're like, you notice.
You're like, dude, how long has that been doing that?
And you're just like, do I pluck it?
Do I trim it?
What am I doing here? You got to do the classic rip out while you're like, dude, how long has that been doing that? You're just like, do I pluck it? Do I trim it? What am I doing here?
It fucking hurts, man.
You got to do the classic rip out while you're driving.
You do, but the problem is, A, it looks like you're picking your nose,
and I guess technically you are, but you're like, no, no, no, it's a nose hair.
You still don't want to be seen doing that.
Also, the nose hair provides a beneficial thing for the body.
I don't care.
It's out of there, man.
You know, you can't have it
flying rogue like where it's just like people are dodging it like all right dude fucking dodging
nose hair you know you're old when you start thinking about having to get like a nose hair
trimmer uh you also know you're old when the uh person who cuts your hair runs the clippers over
your ear to get those little fuzz but if but if have a real one, they'll do it in one false swoop where it's like,
all right, I'm not going to make it look like I'm doing it to you,
but I'm going to hook you up real quick.
I prefer it now.
I don't get them in my ear yet.
Oh, you do.
Yeah, you do.
I was actually talking to Teresa the other day, and she was like,
dude, Dylan's ears are stupid hairy.
Dude, she didn't lie.
She did, dude.
You wouldn't out me like that.
Yo, you got a haircut yesterday.
Are you wearing a hat today?
Let us see this thing.
Don't you know that there's a one-week window where it doesn't look good?
You looked okay at the gym yesterday.
Thanks, man.
Appreciate it.
I noticed you were going no hat.
Yeah.
No cap.
I don't work out in hats, man.
It's not my thing, dog.
You know, I wish I didn't because it's just a great way to ruin a hat.
Yeah, exactly. I have like one actual tech performance i guess the i wear the roback one sometimes but i don't want to i don't want to ruin i want to keep it clean for golf i just brought
you a new one too so your white one is that what you're wearing right now yeah this is an older one
though okay another verge all right very cool man i'm saying Yeah that's really sick dude That's such good news
I really care about that
What else we got today
Dude let's hear from
Bird dogs real quick
Dylan can we get a
Recurring sponsor alert alert
All about new
Recurring sponsor alert
We have a
Recurring sponsor
Bird dogs
Let's go.
Dude, is the only person in here that owns an actual bird dog?
I have to say, I stand bird dog shorts.
I'm pretty sure Stella could retrieve a bird.
Golden can retrieve birds.
It's in her name, all right?
Retriever.
Whatever.
Whatever.
Let's talk about bird dogs.
That's why people are here.
You guys already know what bird dogs are because you've seen a commercial with our faces on it and Dylan's voice and whatever.
That's true.
We stay pushing bird dogs no matter what.
They're Dylan's everything pants, and guess what?
They're my everything pants.
Dude, they even have gym shorts with a built-in silky soft inner liner that makes underwear obsolete.
Here's a true story, a little personal anecdote.
I like to throw one of these sometimes.
After I do laundry and it's time to hit the gym, I reach for my bird dogs first.
They're my number one workout pair of shorts.
They're so comfortable.
Let's go.
Also, I'll swim in them, not to brag.
Yeah, I'll swim in them.
Will you play pool volleyball in them?
You know what, David?
Yeah, I will.
And I'll spike it down on your little pretty hot face.
I'll be on the lawn with Will, where the real players are playing.
Twitched up dudes.
You guys seen these pants called the Kevin Buffets?
Yeah, dude.
No, but I'm in.
K-Buffs.
Could be K-Buffet.
I don't know.
They're my favorite pants.
Facts?
Facts.
Big facts.
So much like you when you're doing your workout-y things that you do.
You're lounging?
No, but when I'm going to go play golf in some mid-60s weather,
the first pants that I go for are my Bird Dogs Performance pants.
Fair.
Not only do these things come in different waist sizes,
but their length sizes are insane.
They've got such a vast array from 28-inch seam to 36-inch seam.
Our 7-foot backer could get a pair of 32-36s and be completely comfortable.
Damn.
That sounds good.
Let me say this.
Let me add this, all right?
Add that.
I've worn competing brand liner shorts and pants, and they're trash compared to bird dogs.
I won't do it anymore.
You're saying their liner's goaded?
100%.
They're so comfortable.
And that's just facts.
Their liner is great.
Some gym shorts, their liner isn't thick enough.
And it's like, dude, what is the purpose of this?
Theirs is like the perfect blend of you don't notice it, but it provides stability.
Or they're way too constricting on other ones.
Yeah.
It's like mash.
I've got something like that.
Mashes my shit.
It like gets all up there and you're like, oh.
I'm not trying to get mashed.
Lunches you up.
That mash button?
No.
I mash that.
Anyway, you know what I'm saying.
Yeah, we understand.
There's a button getting mashed.
Yeah.
For all your bird dog needs, go to birddogs.com and let them know that we sent you.
Go to birddogs.com.
Grab some of their shorts. Grab some of. Go to birddogs.com. Grab some of their shorts.
Grab some of their pants.
Birddogs.com.
Dave, we have a Dave's Gym anecdote that Dylan doesn't believe in on the rundown here.
I don't really know what this means, but if you could explain it for us, that'd be great.
Do you want this, or do you want Dave take Dave proclamation?
One or the other
we could do both
but I mean
I feel like we've been
flush with content
I don't want to
like make us
be in here for an hour
and 15 minutes
which one is going to
ruffle feathers more
it's the latter
let's go latter
I want to get ruffled
um
ruffle me daddy
I often say
rough
I've been thinking
about this
thank you
ruffling feathers with dave check it out
only on patreon um get to the take let me just say this you might have to edit this out
so be prepared um scorching it is um based on what i've seen in everybody going back out and us getting more back to normal world.
Oh, man.
Sizzling might be out.
Fajita sizzling, that is.
They're saying that table-side sliced meat at a Brazilian steakhouse is the new says.
I don't know what that does for you oh my god that changes
anything but i'm saying this i've got a birthday coming up i'm not gonna say when i would never do
that i don't i don't mind if you don't know it's a week from today i'll be out of town but when we
get back we are gonna go get table slot table side slide sliced meat and we're gonna enjoy it
and when they bring it out you're going to notice like
people are reacting to it in a way that you haven't seen since like 2014 matt's el rancho
so we're going to have your birthday at fogo de chow is what you're saying i'm not saying where
maybe texas de brazil maybe fogo fogo might be go don't know. But yeah, we're going to be doing table-side sliced meats.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
How does that make you feel?
I don't know how to respond to this.
You upset with me?
You look a little upset.
I know how much you love your sis.
The last...
Why are fajitas at Matt's no longer sizzling the fact that your your fajitas came out
with and made absolutely no sound they were silent and you couldn't send it back jane silent siz
and the fact that they were the most expensive fajitas you've probably ever had given that dinner that
night was was unfathomably unfathomably expensive for a very reasonably priced restaurant i'm
confused did they bring yours out like already on the platter yeah how many people were y'all with
12-ish 12 that's still not an excuse no i've seen i've seen siz with big groups yeah i still
understand are you the bigger the group the bigger the siz was it a solo order of fajitas Twelve-ish? Twelve. That's still not an excuse. No, I've seen CIS with big groups. Yeah, I still understand.
The bigger the group, the bigger the CIS.
Was it a solo order of fajitas, or were you splitting it with somebody?
I split them with Bay.
So it was two people's worth of fajitas, and Matt's El Rancho is bringing it out not sizzling.
Can you even go in the bar at this point and wait for your table with a drink in hand?
Nope.
They've got to open that bar.
I think the only reason that bar's not opened up is because they can't staff it.
It's the only reason that's acceptable that I can think of.
Hey, Matt, it's welcome to Front Street, right?
I don't know what that means.
Gus Front.
Is that restaurant slang?
No, you put somebody on Front Street, like you're putting them on blast.
Oh, damn.
Calling them out.
Cold Front Street? No. you're missing it's weird that you were splitting
with bay because like i wouldn't think of like a slice of pizza it's like ordering fajitas we'll
see bay is uh britney my girlfriend is not actually pizza that that's that's where you're confused
okay do you get it but queso is also bay that So it's just really, it's like a weird. There was Bay on the table. So much Bay there.
And Bay City next to me.
Okay.
Get it?
I got you.
Yeah.
We won't have this problem at Texas Day Brazil or wherever we go.
Texas Day Brazil.
They're just going to keep that meat coming.
You flip that card, they just bring it over and just start slicing it off.
Is that a real restaurant?
Yeah.
Huh.
I don't know how I feel about those places.
Mainly because every time they come out with that first thing of meat, I've like starved myself all day. Yeah. Huh. I don't know how I feel about those places. Mainly because every time they come out with that first thing of meat, I've like starved myself all day.
And so I'm like, yeah, no, give it to me.
Slice that off.
Keep slicing.
Keep slicing.
I love those places.
I'll say it.
They're awesome.
I've only eaten at one like, I don't know, two or three times.
And every single time I do, it ruins me for the next two days because I'm so full.
If you're ready to feel miserable and just get like a 200-gram protein injection,
that's the spot.
Been looking for one of those.
The prosciutto spread at Fogo de Chow's salad bar is ridiculous,
which makes sense considering it's a meat house, essentially.
The salad bar, don't sleep on their salad bar game.
That's where they get you, though.
That's where they get you.
Catch me skipping salad altogether.
Their salad bar is so bombed that they know that you're just going to fill up on it
if you go over there. It's impossible not to. salad bar is so bombed that they know that you're just going to fill up on it if you go over there.
It's impossible not to.
That lettuce is so fresh.
They got like the mini corn and shit.
Oh, I love baby corn.
Oh, baby corn.
Baby corn.
Do-do-do-do-do-do.
Baby corn.
Do-do-do-do-do-do.
Baby Dorn.
Baby Dorn.
Do-do-do-do-do-do.
It's Dorn.
You're doing baby sharks.
Ooh, should we do a children's book?
I've been thinking about this
Baby Dorn
I feel like we could do a children's book
Superimposed onto a baby corn
Baby Shark
What if we did a children's book called It Hard to Say
And we did a bunch of words
That are maybe hard for toddlers to say
Like any words
Really I don't think they would like that book very much Why? Like bicycle And we did a bunch of words that are maybe hard for toddlers to say. Like any words, really.
I don't think they would like that book very much.
Why?
Like bicycle.
Like chrysanthemum.
And we mansplained to children how to say words that are long, like helicopter, bicycle.
You want to mansplain to toddlers how to say words.
Yeah, but the book is called It Hard to Say.
I don't think a publisher is going to jump on that.
If you're a publisher and you want to jump on something,
email Dylan at washmedia.com.
Audiobook.
Some might say we do audiobooks every day in here.
Toddlers aren't listening to audiobooks.
Not yet. Have you thought about that?
No, I haven't.
New market. Baby pods.
Baby pods. It's just us
doing baby talk for babies.
It's got legs, man.
My baby talk is just, it's not even, we've done this, we've talked about this before,
but it's not like baby, I don't do like a, oh, look, you know like they do in the movies,
like a little roadie?
I don't do that.
Oh, your boy does.
No, I'm not doing it with other people's kids.
I'll talk to Parks like he's an adult. Well, he can talk now.
I always did, though.
I always did.
You're a tough customer.
Baby
baby
You're like asking him, like, hey, have you followed your taxes yet?
I don't talk about
adult stuff. Hey, have you been putting
money away for college?
No, dude, they extended the deadline for taxes after the freeze. Hey, have you been putting money away for college? Part of it's like, no, dude.
They extended the deadline for Texas after the freeze.
Dude, he just bought a Nintendo Switch.
What's your investment strategy?
Did he file like a W-2?
Does he have a W-2 or anything for all the money that you have been siphoning toward him for his Nintendo Switch and shit?
It's under the table.
Wow, you pay your kid under the table? I'm going to make my kid pay taxes on his tooth fairy stuff.
It's a gift.
Don't have to claim it.
Like, by the time, like, by the time Fritz starts losing teeth,
I'm going to be Venmoing him for, like, his teeth and shit.
It's like, here you go, dude.
Here's five bucks.
Go enjoy.
Just put it in his 529 or whatever.
I'm afraid it didn't come from the Tooth Fairy.
It came from you.
Okay, I'll change my ad on Venmo to the Tooth Fairy.
Is the 529, is that the college education fund? I don't know. didn't come from the tooth fairy came from you okay i'll change my ad on venmo to the tooth fairy
is the uh 529 is that the college the education fund i don't know something like that how the
would i know that because you have a son you have a kid i'm just curious because like if you
start putting money into it now fritz in college in 18 years in 18 years is college even going to
be right going to trade are people going to be going to college i sure hope not and i put all
this money into the account it's like i'm not going to save for. Are people going to be going to college? I sure hope not. And I put all this money into the account, and it's like, eh.
I'm not going to save for college for Fritz.
He'll figure it out when he gets there.
I hope college is obsolete at some point.
Seriously.
It's a waste of time.
Yeah, but what if he grows up like you, and since he can never remember,
he's always wanted to be a frat star?
Ask me what I learned in college.
Go ahead.
What did you learn in college?
I don't know.
Wow.
Keg in the closet.
I learned how to make pizza on the floor.
I learned how to make panty droppers.
All right?
That's what I learned.
Okay.
Cool.
That's your craft cocktail of choice?
No.
Go over to Dylan's place and he's like, yeah.
PPD.
Wow, you got quite the bar set up over here.
Some guy dumping Hawaiian punch and stirring it with his forearm.
Exactly.
So, yeah, I'd like to go to a Brazilian steakhouse in a couple weeks.
That's what I'm basically trying to tell you.
Very cool, man.
If we're planning your birthday now, I'm in.
Hey, you guys hear that?
No.
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I'm not going to lie.
I might kick back, like, numerous Vizzys at our meetup. Grab yourself a drink that can do both. Vizzy Hard Seltzer. I'm not going to lie.
I might kick back, like, numerous Vizzys at our meetup.
Acerola is a soup off-road.
Soup off-road.
No one's asking for this.
It's soup off-road, eh?
Do we know what kind of Vizzy we're going to have in the cooler for the meetup?
Does it matter?
Honestly, no, it does not matter.
No, it absolutely does not.
Is Pars going to let us take his bed and fill it with Izzy?
Yeah, we talked about it. He's cool with it.
We just got to return it before he goes to bed.
I'll clean it out.
You might catch me drinking a pineapple mango during Happy Hour Live tonight.
That's pretty flirty.
Holy crap.
I know.
That's wild.
I might put on a party shirt and just drink pineapple mango all night.
Mango.
Interesting. Who knows? Maybe I'll put on a party shirt and just drink pineapple mango all night. Mango. Interesting.
Mm-hmm.
Who knows?
Maybe I'll hit them with a raspberry tangerine.
I do have some leftover watermelon, or sorry, lemonade flavors as well.
I might get absolutely loco tonight.
You know I'm a big lemonade guy.
You know that about me.
I know your boy loves lemonade.
You know your boy likes Verts.
Much like Verts.
Dylan just loves lemonade. You know your boy likes Verts. Much like Verts. Dylan just loves it.
No, I celebrate all their flavors, really, but I'm partial to the lemonade.
Watermelon lemonade being my fave.
Watermelon lemonade.
You're just copying me.
That's my fave.
What are you doing?
You have never even tried it.
Be your own man.
I will.
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Must be 21 or older.
Dylan, what are you doing this weekend?
Wow, thank you for asking me, Will.
It's a pleasure. Yeah, I have a
big weekend ahead of me.
Bay and I are going
to San Antonio. A little
getaway, a little weekend getaway.
We're staying at a hotel
downtown.
And we've got a nice little dinner planned Friday night that's walkable from our hotel, I believe.
And we're just going to lounge and hit the pool
and just do San Antonio shit.
I'm pretty excited, man.
You're going to go to the Riverwalk?
I don't know. Maybe.
You should go catch a drink at Hotel Havana.
Maybe. Havana Havana. Maybe.
Havana Unana.
Maybe.
I forget the name of the restaurant we're going to, but it's apparently pretty dope.
Senior Frogs?
Pretty dope.
David.
Is there a Rainforest Cafe there?
I don't know.
Anyway, I'm pumped.
That's all I really got.
Come back Sunday.
Oh, fuck yeah.
What, dawg?
They have a Rainforest Cafe there.
Yeah, well, I'm not going.
Why?
It's a Rainforest-themed chain for American fare and cocktails amid jungle and flora and
animatropic animals.
Because I'm 37.
So?
AJ, nothing but a number, dude.
Go to Rainforest Cafe.
Please just go get a pic in front of it for me.
Look, if I happen to walk by it maybe but i'm not gonna go
seek it out for you okay dave we can rent it we can rent it out they do parties and group events
we can rent it out for your birthday if you're trying to pivot a little bit from a brazilian
steakhouse to a rainforest dylan dylan was texting me earlier saying he prefers a brazilian
so i don't want to like disappoint him i mean maybe yeah
maybe that's all I got, guys.
I will do Rainforest Cafe with you.
Is it in San Antonio or Austin?
San Antonio.
Y'all trying to come with?
San Antonio.
Hop in.
Hop in the whip.
I'm driving.
Some dude on Twitter just came at me.
Hey, big dog.
We got to get you on a collagen routine for those duffel bags under your eyes.
Hey, man.
Look.
What the fuck? I have a baby at home. You know. bags under your eyes. Hey, man, look.
I have a baby at home.
You know.
Yeah, this is coming from a guy who definitely does not lose sleep.
I guess he's referring to the video.
I thought it looked pretty good in the video.
People are complimenting my authentic jersey.
Thank you.
Shout out to the listener that sent that to me.
It was an interesting move to not take the tags off, but I like it.
I'm not ready to pop tags. What is the dynamic with commenters on social media and guys like us?
You know what?
Anything we post, it's just open season on our page.
They're pretty nice to us 99% of the time.
And I got to say this, Will.
Looking at this guy's photo, he's wearing a Sunday Scaries pullover.
There we go. Now we're talking. This guy wearing a Sunday Scaries pullover. There we go.
Now we're talking.
This guy's a big Scaries guy.
You know what?
A Scaries listener, of all people, should understand.
Yeah, sometimes you got bags under your eyes.
Unbelievable.
Unbelievable.
Jerk city, man.
Maybe you wouldn't have bags under your eyes if you weren't constantly in your own bag.
Dude, I'm sorry I got the bag.
It's a major bag alert.
He should have just said drop the bag, and I would have understood.
I'd be so devastated if someone was singing major bag alert, He should have just said drop the bag. And I would have understood. I'd be so devastated
if someone was singing major bag alert and it was about my eyes.
Like, fuck.
That's not nice. Guess who's going to go to
Nordstrom or whatever and just
throw some
go over to the young lady
selling the eye products. Like, hey,
this guy on Twitter came at me.
He's got to do something about this.
He can't have that. He'd go.
What if you just had a troop of Nordstrom employees just coming at you on Twitter about your eyes and your style just so you'd go in and they could get commish off you?
I haven't gone.
I haven't been to Nordstrom in a while.
It would be a long play, but I would respect it.
They know Dave's a Nordstrom guy.
They do.
I haven't been in a while, man.
Oh, fuck.
Their men's section isn't that good.
Wow.
You didn't have to do them like that.
Yeah, Front Street.
Hey, Nordy, welcome to Front Street.
Dude, I'll put them on Main.
Damn, dog.
Is that a thing, too?
Probably.
I don't know.
Dave, what are you doing this weekend?
I got really no plans.
Oh, that sounds sick, man.
What about you, Will?
I'm going out of town Monday.
Me and my bags.
I'm packing my bags and taking the bags under my eyes, and I'm going to Cabo.
When are you leaving?
Monday.
Sick.
Wow, dude.
Must be nice. We're going to miss Monday. Wow, dude. Must be nice.
We're going to miss you next week.
You're taking a fuck ton
of vacation.
I feel like I have not done that.
Dude, you're taking a fuck ton.
I don't think so.
What's your problem?
A fun ton.
Are you most excited
for the spinach salad?
Be honest.
I don't know, man.
The Wagyu glizzy
does sound
It is so good.
very enticing.
It is really, really, really good.
I'm very excited.
I'm excited for you.
So, yeah, I'll be continuing to be mid-30s on my birthday in Cabo.
Congratulations.
Thank you.
We're about to be the same age again.
Are you going to check the bags of your eyes? We're about to be the same age again. Are you going to check the bags of your eyes?
We're about to be the same age.
Again.
Excuse me?
But you're like way older.
Just in general.
Nine months.
Got nine months on Davey Boy.
That's significant time.
Davey Boy.
That's a year in dog years.
True.
Right?
No.
It's over a year.
Yes. Yeah. So this over a year. Yes.
Yeah.
So this weekend I'm going to probably lay low.
I'll probably lay a little low, but I don't know.
Maybe I heard somebody's Friday just freed up a little bit.
So we'll see.
If you go somewhere outdoors where I can wear my sunglasses and not have people see my eyes.
True.
I'll start calling you squints.
That's
offensive.
Sick dude.
Trying to line up
some golf for Cabo.
They have not called me back.
Have fun with that one.
Late in the game.
You know if you play golf
that means she gets to go
to the spa.
That's the trade off.
Yeah everybody knows that.
The spa is going to cost
more than your golf round. Oh god. Are you sure to go to the spa. That's the trade-off. Yeah, everybody knows that. The spa's going to cost more than your golf round.
Oh, God. Are you sure? Welcome to Cabo.
Bienvenido a Cabo.
The pool scene there is really
awesome. It's awesome. Dude, I have a
low-key lit weekend lined up.
Well, maybe. Come with me to San Antonio?
No, I'm not going to go to San Antonio with you.
This sounds truly awful.
I don't know. For the first time ever in the history of Fritz,
I have a Friday where I have no wife and no kid.
Where are they going to be, man?
Well, they're going to our friend's lake house, and I would love to go,
but it wouldn't be very fun for me as I cannot really do much
because of the mole that was removed, and they're floating like the river.
They're going to be doing aquatic activities the entire time.
Oh, my God, that sucks.
So I'd just be sitting there sidelines.
So we decided maybe
it's just an off night for Big DeFreezy over here.
Big DeFreezy. That does sound really
dope. It does sound dope, but
I don't want to sit there watching other people
have fun in the sun while I'm just
sitting here like an idiot. You've got like a trash
bag wrapped around your arm? Yeah, like it's just
not going to happen like that. Dude, just wear the
AI sleeve. Undelay, undelay,
mama. Can you wear that?
Would that work?
I don't know if that would work.
Okay.
So I'm trying to set up some plans.
I think I might try to get some people to mob with me on Friday night.
Hard to say.
And then Saturday, Sally will be returning from Stead Lake House,
and we have a dinner reservation at the hottest new Italian spot in town.
Sames.
Buongiorno's.
Yep.
Chiesa.
It might be lasagna season Come Saturday night at 9.30
Are you gonna mash that lasagna button?
Yeah last time I was there
I tried to mash the lasagna button
But they were sold out
How are you gonna sell out a lasagna?
Do you remember Garfield
How much he loved lasagna?
He fucking loved it dude
What's his deal with lasagna?
I don't know
It's a big orange cat man
It's good though
Lasagna's very filling
It's good
Oh yeah
Very heavy Good for you man That's sick Thatagna is very filling it's good oh yeah very heavy good for you man
that's all i got though okay not a lot of soccer hey television so when they bring you that bread
what's your move hot shot i'm eating it because i'm fucking i'm broke get away five minutes man
i'm snagging that shit you're trash i'm snagging that shit i You're trash. I'm snagging that shit. I'm taking the best looking one that I can find and I'm just eating it.
Wow.
Goblin.
I'm an in-piece guy.
When it comes to bread, I'm just stacking it all the time.
No one's an in-piece guy.
I am.
No.
That's stupid.
Wow.
We got something breaking in the studio right now.
The Magic Bullet himself has walked into the room.
Is this breast-breaking news?
You might call it something like that.
By the way, Will, I didn't realize that was a montage hat
until I got in to the studio.
Yeah.
Currently.
I thought it said something completely different.
So I apologize.
Hat tip John Hickey, J.R. Hickey of That's a Nice Touch.
As the valet brought our car around,
as we checked out from the hotel,
they had two hats sitting on the dashboard for us
so we could have them set off into the sunset with.
Wow.
That's sick, man.
That's a nice touch.
That is a nice touch.
It's a nice touch.
This whole time I thought you were repping a Monsanto hat.
I keep that one at home.
That's for personal use and dog walks only.
Brett, break some fucking news for us.
Sure.
Would you like to go nuggets potential insurance
fraud or heavy metal
are you asking me
Dylan usually gets the
Dylan's done enough
for one day
let me take care of this
one a while
Dylan's done a lot
on this episode
let's go heavy metal
heavy metal
wow taking Dave's one
let's go
a New Zealand mom
has named her children
Dylan
would you like to know what their names are?
Metallica.
Yep.
Pantera.
Pantera, number two.
Are you kidding?
Wait, we're right?
Yeah.
Oh.
A New Zealand mom.
Iron Maiden?
A New Zealand mom has named her kids Metallica, Pantera, and Slayer.
Slayer is going to be my next guess.
Let's go.
Okay.
I love this move.
No.
It's a terrible move, but I do love it.
Would you help me out?
Metallica.
Here's the mob.
Okay.
Oh, that makes sense.
She's pretty metal.
She's wielding a crossbow.
She's wielding a crossbow.
Find you a bay that pierces her cheeks.
Wrong cheeks.
The crown tattoo on her wrist.
I've always said find you a bay that pierces her cheeks.
It's flannel Friday.
Damn, it really is.
With a crossbow, is there a...
How fast does a crossbow shoot?
You're dead.
It pierces the sternum.
It will kill you.
Right.
I figured it would kill you, but is it...
Really?
Like bow and arrow, like compound bow versus crossbow.
I'm going to get my DMs flooded.
Compound bow, I believe, is stronger, faster, however you want to say it.
But they're both dead meat.
You sure about that?
Pretty sure.
Have they tested it on people that are built different?
That's a good question.
I hope they're not testing it on people.
I could be totally wrong.
I feel like a compound bow, if you gonna penetrate an elk gross uh you know it's gotta
be it's gonna have some serious thing though it's compound think about it like that what's the uh
what's the other one a recurve yep something with it with the bow recurves what recurve bow
the one that dude perfect has that curves around i don't know that's a nerf gun
recurve bow.
What? The one that Dude Perfect has
that curves around?
No, that's a Nerf gun.
We were supposed to get one of those
in exchange for a video or something.
In exchange for Randy.
Yeah, for Randy,
and it never happened.
They passed.
They better not be going after our interns.
Can you imagine if media companies,
if we could just trade people
like they do in sports leagues?
Like you can trade a coach in the NBA.
Yeah.
What is Randy getting on the market
besides a Nerf gun?
I think that's pretty much it, man.
Some salt and vinegar chips.
And there's like the newest TikTokers
are like this year's draft class.
So they give them to the shitty media.
Like Bleacher gets their first pick of a TikToker.
Can we do our next one
so we can get this lady off the screen?
Sure.
I don't like how she's looking at me. Can we do our next one so we can get this lady off the screen? Sure. What do you want to go? She is.
I don't like how she's looking at me.
She is scaring the shit out of me.
I don't like how she is looking at me.
Would you like to know nuggets or insurance fraud, Will?
I think nuggets.
I don't know if you saw on the timeline yesterday,
but Popeyes is jumping into the chicken nugget game.
People are saying that McDonald's better watch out.
I saw that Popeye's is stockpiling chicken because there's a shortage.
They've been stockpiling it for like six and a half months.
That's smart.
That's savvy.
And frozen chicken.
Their chicken reserves are off the charts.
Good.
We should bet.
They should be.
We should have the dollar valued upon their chicken reserves.
Speaking of, Powell just said they should have a digital U.S. currency.
Which is bad for crypto and stuff.
Anyway.
Sounds like you're getting a little delight in everybody listening to crypto's misery.
That's cool.
They said in the wake of the success of the chicken sandwich, we are going to jump into the chicken nugget game.
Meals vary in quantity between four and 36 pieces,
and they will begin selling it at the end of July
at all participating Popeye's locations.
I'll take down all 36.
There's no doubt about it.
Yeah.
It won't even be in question.
I love chicken.
Are you a nugget guy?
Who's not a nugget guy?
Oh, you're more of a dino nugget guy.
It's just a smaller version of, you know.
Chicken tenders.
Chicken, yeah.
Sure.
Yeah, I'm going to mess up some of these.
I will try them, yes.
Have we ever done the chicken?
Did we ever do the chicken sandwich?
Chicken.
No, we have to do the burger challenge.
It's chicken.
We have to do burgers.
We have to do pizza.
Wilson's pizza.
Schlotzky's challenge.
Dave, you're a big insurance fraud guy.
Right?
Mm-hmm.
Man who set fire to house by cooking steak in toaster is upset at the insurance payout.
According to stuff.co.nz, another New Zealand story,
a man who attempted to cook a steak in a toaster sparked a fire that destroyed his home
and was upset to find that his insurance policy did not pay out as much as he wanted it to. A man who attempted to cook a steak in a toaster sparked a fire that destroyed his home.
It was set to find that his insurance policy did not pay out as much as he wanted it to. Let me guess.
It only paid like $418,000.
That's exactly what it paid out.
We did this with Micah, didn't we?
Oh, did you already?
Is this a story that you've done?
Yeah.
Oh, with Ross?
You were here.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
I remember the numbers.
Don was just texting.
Well, Will, this is a story for you, then.
Yeah, I didn't know this.
This is a great story.
Dude popped a steak in a toaster and left to go get chips from the local fish and chips spot.
As one does.
Comes back to return, and his house is in flames.
He's only paid out $418,000 and argued he should have been paid out another $200,000 on top of that.
Maybe just don't microwave your steak.
Or toast it.
Maybe toast it.
Would you rather microwave it or toast it?
I think toast it.
Toaster's going to ruin your toaster, though.
Yeah, but the steak's going to be fire.
Is it?
Well, you just did the story.
It's like a little oven, really.
Randy liked it.
Anyway, that's it for the New Zealand folks out there.
Very cool.
A lot of New Zealand today.
Yeah, wow.
Yeah, mate.
It's like we're finishing each other's...
What?
Senses.
Is it time?
Yeah.
I need a nap.
Bye.