Circling Back - Hinge Profiles & Salad Dressings
Episode Date: February 3, 2021The squad gets to craft Randy's hinge profile, Courtside Karen, Jeff Bezos stepping down as CEO of Amazon to be on the board of directors at Washed Media, Smash or Pass: Salad Dressing Edition, This W...eekend in Fun, and Brett's Breaking News dealing with some Tyler C. Bachelor news and big cats in Arizona. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (12:55) Courtside Karen (20:55) Jeff Bezos Is Over It (34:22) Smash or Pass: Salad Dressings (41:00) This Weekend in Fun (58:34) Brett’s Breaking News Support This Episode’s Sponsors Rhoback: www.rhoback.com (STELLA20 for 20% off) Hims: www.forhims.com/steam (90-day money back guarantee!) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from the lodge my name's
will to freeze to my right to my left dylan shivery uh hey everybody You guys ready to, oh, I don't know, circle back on some things?
Oh, we did it!
Leo.jif, dude.
Oh, man.
Glad to be here.
It's going to be a great episode.
I'm feeling it, despite not having Dave batting lead all for us.
I spoke to Dave for a little bit yesterday.
That's what I heard.
Had about a 15-minute phone call with Dave.
That man is itching.
Itching to talk shop.
I love it.
When Dave comes back, it's going to be like 98, the summer of 98.
It's just Sosa, McGuire.
Dylan's going to be involved too.
Rising Tide lifts all ships.
This is exciting stuff.
Wait, what?
If he's Sosa, who's McGuire?
You.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, you're McGuire.
Who's Will?
Will be like Edgar Renteria or something.
Meatballs?
Yeah, did anyone else have a really good season that year? It's hard to say. Yeah, you're McGuire. Who's Will? Will would be like Edgar Renteria or something. He was pitching with meatballs. Yeah, did anyone else have a really good season that year?
It's hard to say.
Yeah, whatever.
That's a good trivia question.
Who batted ahead of Mark McGuire?
That's me.
You were just getting on base?
I'm just trying to get on base.
Just set the play for McGuire?
Mm-hmm.
All right.
They're throwing me a lot of pitches because they want to get me out.
Yeah.
Oh, that's a wild.
You know who was third that season?
Griffey.
Yeah.
I'm Griffey.
You're Griffey.
He put up 56.
Yeah.
That's a great season.
He got very overshadowed that season.
It was pretty unfortunate.
He was in the race for a while.
That's got to be his highest ever, I think.
I don't know.
That's unreal.
Larry Walker took the batting title.
Yeah.
That dude raked.
Yeah, he did.
John Ulrich.
Did he or Tony Quinn that season ever bat 400?
Did either of them do it?
No, they didn't do it, right?
No.
I remember that being a thing and me thinking it was pretty cool.
The last person to bat 400 was like maybe Ted Williams.
I think it was Ted Williams, 406.
But he was batting against just like dudes dudes who had day jobs and shit, right?
That's not that impressive.
You guys are doing that
20-second line.
Here's my fastball, see?
Here comes the change-up.
A little off-speed mix-in for you.
That off-speed.
I will never get sick of that voice.
You ever see a knuckleball?
Yeah.
They were throwing 82-mile-an-hour gas.
Yeah.
Just to bring it home.
Yeah, cool Ted.
Ted's like, this is fucking easy.
Hitting beach balls from fucking butchers down the street that have day jobs.
Sick, dude.
Oh, my God.
Oh, man.
Hey, I'm the fastball, see?
We got the magic bullet in here, too, filling in for Dave.
How's Brett doing today?
The umpires's just like,
strike one.
Yeah.
That's a strike.
That's a strike.
You're out.
You're out of there.
You're out of here, sir.
Take a hike.
Out of here, mister.
Imagine the arguments
between the managers and the umpire.
You gotta be fucking kidding me.
Get the fuck out of here.
Nah, that's hogwash.
Your dumbest conversation of all time.
Hogwash. Malarkey, yeah so stupid no one says hug what no they should they should oh goodness we were talking before
this like we're a little worried dave's gonna come back we're just got different bits going
the entire time and he's gonna be lost nobody be lost. Nobody knows the game. He's going to need a six-episode loading phase to get back in.
When you've missed in the past,
do you feel like you need to catch up on what the boys are saying?
No, I usually just listen to the first ten minutes
to make sure I don't get dragged, and then I move on.
We usually drag you a little bit.
Yeah.
I just listen to the dragging just to make sure it's nothing too bad,
and then I go about my day. Yeah. I have listen to the Dragon just to make sure it's nothing too bad. Right. And then I go about my day.
Yeah.
I have faith in you guys.
I wonder if Dave – I guess Dave doesn't have much time to live.
Well, maybe he does.
No, when I talked to him – so when I talked to him yesterday, he was like, dude, I got
20 minutes into The Bachelor and then just shit hit the fan.
He's like, I haven't even watched The Bachelor yet.
He's just rattled.
He's getting it.
Yeah.
It's great though.
It's great.
He's getting the dad crash course already. Mm- though. It's great. The dad crash course already.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yep.
Yep.
Should we just call him?
Should we just be like, well, what up?
I'd call him if I had faith that he'd –
I'd feel really bad if we called him and he just was waking up from a nap on the couch.
Yeah.
According to what he said on Twitter, he got 12 minutes of sleep last night.
That's good.
Probably an exaggeration, but –
You've got to think his whoop recovery's not great.
No, no, certainly not.
Yours must be just tanking
now that you did so much walking yesterday.
People are, yeah,
making fun of my walks, man.
I'm taking Stella on walks.
How many steps you getting yesterday?
Did you download the Visor app?
Because you could have donated a meal
with how many fucking miles you walked yesterday.
Yeah.
Man, I had a fitness day yesterday.
God, we get it, dude.
You're hot.
What are you putting up?
I'm getting the bod back.
You're looking tiny, though.
No, you're not.
I've lost a little bit of weight.
Didn't you do the opposite of sober January?
You just got absolutely drunk every single night?
Yeah. I respect night? Yeah.
I respect that.
Yeah.
Man.
We were doing intervals yesterday on the tready.
Really?
Yeah.
It sucks.
I think your boy's going to start trying some yoga on my mixing days, on my off days.
Might just do some 20-minute beginner's yoga to see how I do with it.
I've never done it before.
My steps yesterday were 14,785.
You could have donated a meal to Dylan Barber's thing.
Yeah, a lot.
Do you not like the bachelor?
Yes, I do.
I mean, you're trying to get 10K, right?
That's like the magic number every day?
10K steps?
I think like, yeah, 5K is like minimum, and then like 10K is like you're healthy.
Stella got hella steps in too then because I took her on two walks, man.
Also, you just multiply yours by two because she has four legs.
And she probably takes smaller steps than me.
Maybe it's like times four.
Can I bring Rosie by?
I'll pay you like $9 an hour to walk my dog.
You want me to walk your dog?
Yeah.
Sounds great.
Let's go.
$9 an hour?
That's solid.
That's fun.
Is that the dog walk market rate right now?
I don't know.
Like, I don't know the rate for anything anymore.
Everything I have in my head is based off what my parents paid people as kids.
And that's not counting for inflation.
Yeah, inflation is really taking things to a next level.
Some cool teens are going to be like, yeah, I walked your dog for like $50.
Yeah, it's like, what?
Huh?
Those apps cost like $22 to do it.
It's crazy.
Looks like somebody fact-checked.
That's a hard phrase.
There he is.
Big facts. Fact-checked. That's a hard phrase. There he is. Big facts.
Fact-checked.
Dave's 12 minutes.
It said, actually, whoopsies, you get 2.49 hours.
Whoa.
That's not much better.
No.
That's not much better.
That's tough.
Usually it's ideal to have more than two and a half hours of sleep.
Yeah.
That's kind of brutal.
Sorry, Dave.
Damn, Dave's getting exposed through his fitness app.
T-Man's out here saying that he's burning 500 calories and he's only burning 499.
T-Man's just a straight liar.
He did have a good ride yesterday, though.
Why not just stay on the peli for five more seconds?
That's a good question.
Burn one more cow.
I mean, you do.
It's just probably the workout ended, so it stopped counting his calories while he was doing it.
Oh.
Yeah.
Whatever.
It's pretty easy to burn a calorie.
Between when we started talking about T-Man and now, we've probably burned, like, five calories.
Active calories are totally diff, though.
Yeah.
Yeah, the thing about active calories is that they're calories that are active.
Exactly.
Good point.
They're just putting up big boy weight.
Yeah.
Getting their steps in.
This is going to be a solid episode.
We got some good shit in the hopper.
I can feel it in my plums.
Let's get right to it.
Programming notes.
Add some people on the Grom, a.k.a. Circling Back Pod, a.k.a. Wash Media.
Add me on the group.
Leave a review and five-star rating.
We had a massive influx of reviews last week, and I have to say I enjoyed a lot of them.
Damn.
Whether they were bits, whether they were just people.
The people stepped up.
Dude, it was great.
I don't know why we got so many.
We're getting new listeners, man.
I don't know why we got so many new ones, but I was really enjoying it.
Yeah, it's tight. We're going to break free from. I don't know why we got so many new ones, but I was really enjoying it. Yeah, it's tight.
We're going to break free from the small to mid-size and go solid mid-size.
Solid mid-size would be good.
At this rate.
Dude, this pot is mid.
Also, if you want to see every single episode with our faces, youtube.com slash washed media.
Again, that's youtube.com slash washed media.
Go like and subscribe.
Aren't we really close to a milestone on there, like 4,000 subscribers?
Like, we could hit it momentarily.
Just do it.
Just go do it.
We want 4,000.
4K looks good.
Round numbers.
Can I pull back the curtain here?
Pull it back.
You know how you guys are on video for every Circling Back podcast?
For the mail-in, Randy actually shows Kayla and I how we look on the screen before the pod.
So we can see how we look.
You can primp?
Yeah.
Damn, Randy.
Do you not care about how we look?
Sorry, Randy, for throwing you under the bus vehemently there.
Randy's kind of having a hair day.
I have to give it to him.
He is.
He is having a hair day.
Randy's having a hot day.
He is kind of hot today.
He's got the Cuts shirt going, the blue blocking glasses.
You should get a Hinge profile.
He usually looks very average.
We're doing it.
This was on R&B radio yesterday.
Randy, he's getting on Hinge,
and he's allowing us to make his profile.
Like all of us or just you?
No, all of us.
I've got to compete with Randy now?
Are you on Hinge?
Do you guys have the same age demo?
Yeah.
It's up to the girl, not up to the guy.
Do you do the demo?
No, you can do the demo.
You can adjust the age range.
Are you doing the same age range as Randy?
I don't know what Andy's...
I can't say shit today. Randy, your your age range didn't you say it was like
18 to 24 so yeah dylan's got the same one stop dude dylan's dylan does his by location he like
takes 36 out there but it's like lakeway to easter uh when you set the age range it asks you if you
want if it's a deal breaker.
If you say no, then it'll just give you people from all ages.
It's really pointless to set the age range.
I said no. I kind of like that.
And I get 55-year-old women who holler at me.
Like, oh, I appreciate it, but I'm not interested.
So you passed?
First date at HEB?
What? It's where you take a 55-year-old woman, I presume, on a first interested. So you passed? First dated, like, H-E-B? What?
That's where you take a 55-year-old woman, I presume, on a first date.
To H-E-B?
Yeah, why not?
You go to the Central Market Cafe.
That sounds pretty chill.
Yeah.
Have a glass of wine.
Luby's?
No, you can't go there anymore.
She can't go there anymore.
Yeah, that's too bad.
But, yeah, if you liked R&B radio, go check it out often, every Tuesday,
right after our Bachelor podcast, which also airs on Tuesdays,
and then voicemails on Friday.
I'm really excited
for Randy's hinge journey.
Me too.
This is going to be fun.
Me too.
We've got to set up your profile.
Will Mommies are scrambling right now.
Yeah.
Yeah, we have full reign.
Let's go.
Yeah, it is.
You literally said we have full reign.
Wow, Randy can't stand the rain.
I want to know.
I can't stand the rain. Sorry. to know. I can't stand the rain.
Sorry.
Before we really get into it, can we talk about HIMS real quick?
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I mean, speaking of hair days,
Brett's just getting wronged by Randy looking so hot behind him.
Well, I didn't point out Brett's good hair day
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and it's kind of annoying.
Yeah, that's fair.
That's fair.
Brett, talk about your journey with hymns.
So a long time ago, at this point I was 20,
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And hair is a big part of my life.
Yes.
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So yesterday we walked into the studio,
and Brett said we got to talk about courtside caring.
I wasn't even watching the game.
I haven't been big on my NBA bullshit this year lately.
Yeah.
Well, you don't need to have watched the game to figure out what was going on.
True.
True.
I just didn't see it live.
What the fuck, Courtside Karen?
What's your problem?
Yeah, I haven't watched one shot of NBA basketball this year
except for SportsCenter highlights, which they don't even do anymore, really, which is kind of a shame.
Courtside Karen got into it with LeBron James.
LeBron James.
You know him?
Yeah.
And he gave her the nickname.
That's what I like about it.
Yeah.
Like, it's just ruthless by him.
How many...
So this was in Atlanta.
I don't know how many people they're actually letting in the arena there.
Not that many.
But if you sit courtside at an NBA game today in, like, COVID times when there's, like, you know, obviously not many people in the stands, that's crazy access to these guys because it's pretty quiet in there.
Yes, it's dead quiet.
You can hear, like, I don't know.
I haven't been watching that much NBA, but, like, they still don't have crowds for soccer games.
And you can hear exactly what people are yelling at each other, especially when they don't pump in the crowd noise.
It's crazy the stuff you can hear.
In a full arena, you can yell at these guys.
And they might hear it, but it's, you know, it's like it's kind of background noise at the same time because it's so loud in there.
Yeah.
Now it's like you can have, like, straight-up conversations with these guys.
And this guy has a history of her her husband i should say i don't know his name but he's
he's much older than she is he has a history of just hating lebron for reasons i don't know
there's just lebron haters out there right but he's i mean he's a hawks fan like right it's weird
anyway not really competing in the same he has like numerous instagram posts from like years ago
being like with like pictures of him sitting courtside with LeBron in frame.
And he's like, yeah, I really hate this guy.
I'm like, okay.
Cool dude. Sick.
And so I guess he chirped at LeBron.
LeBron chirped back.
And then his wife saw an opportunity to become courtside Karen.
And the second she took the mask down,
that's when you know that shit's going to hit the fan.
Oh, yeah.
These two look like a couple you see at like a –
Vegas pool party?
Like a high roller Vegas like lounge or something, you know?
Yeah.
A lot of work done.
Maybe where they met, honestly.
Yeah.
There was a high-end seafood restaurant in Houston that I think has now gone under, which is probably good.
It's called Salt Air.
And I was sitting there one day, and every single couple standing at the bar looked exactly like these two.
Yeah.
It's just like an old dude who is on some kind of supplement that makes his body look weird.
He's on tea enhancements, and he works out a lot, but it's gross looking at the same time.
I know exactly. Like old man workout body. Yeah. Yeah. but it's gross looking at the same time. I know exactly.
Like old man workout body.
Yeah.
And it's super tan.
Super tan.
It looks like a leather bag.
Yeah.
And he's wearing a button down that's too big for him.
And his wife is 40 years younger.
I thought, is there anything wrong with that?
No, we're not ages here.
Because as we know from Dylan's Hinge, anything's on the table.
It is a certain vibe, though, when you're into that couple.
There's connotations that go along with couples that look like this.
Whether or not those are true, that's up for us to decide.
Right.
And if you haven't seen a picture of courtside Karen, she looks exactly how you're imagining her to look.
Yeah.
She also said she's 25.
I'd like to see her birth certificate.
I respect her confidence because if I was yelling at somebody
who is considered to be in the conversation of one of the greatest of all time,
I would get immediate shake voice and wouldn't be able to even go back at him.
If LeBron started yelling at me in the stands, I'd be done for.
I'd sink into my seat.
I'd try to liquid myself away like Alex Mack.
That's when you've got to go full Rashid and just go back at him.
What would you say back to LeBron if he was like, hey, little bitch, sit down?
You'd be like, fuck you, LeBron.
She's the one calling her a bitch.
Yeah, which I don't know if that's true.
She's since apologized for what happened.
She's shown remorse because I think she realized that more people are going to take LeBron James' side
than maybe her side, just given the situation.
But, like, kind of a little too late.
Did he actually call her a B-I-T-C-H?
You can't do that.
You'd think the mics would pick that up, right?
I haven't heard it.
I could be wrong, but I haven't heard that recording.
Do we have footage of the incident or just the aftermath?
I think just the aftermath.
All I've seen is the aftermath.
Her voice is just, it's the exact voice you would think of, too.
She stinks.
It's like half Wolf of Wall Street.
What's her name?
Margot Robbie.
And she did the thing that makes the whole thing look even cheaper.
She got on her Instagram after the fact and explained herself with videos, selfie videos.
She turned the sparkly filter on.
And it's like you're just writing this out.
You just want to become somebody from this incident.
Why do people put the filters on when they're doing video?
I don't know.
It's like, okay, you don't need stars floating around your head while you're talking to the internet.
It's trying to look super hot.
It's unnecessary.
It's like clicking in and out of giving her a dog nose and tongue.
Yeah.
Yeah, she just saw this as a chance to become a name.
What was the Snapchat one?
Wasn't there a dog one that people thought that girls looked hotter with when they actually had the dog on?
Oh, the dog filter?
Dude, the dog filter is a no-brainer.
Like one of the most popular ones.
Yeah, I mean, I haven't been on Snapchat two years you want to i have all the filties if
you want them back back when uh those were hot if you couldn't hop on a dating app without seeing
like every girl had those on it's like we want to see what you actually look like oh they'd use the
photo of them with like the dog filter on just heavily filtered from snap like stupid shit from
snapchat like the butterfly around your head floating around your head shit like that
It's like we don't care about this. What are you doing? How do you look in real life?
Yeah, you can't use that as your date. Actually. Should we just do that for Randy? Yeah, let's just have like Randy's
I'll be like super overly like face tuned. Yeah
It's so it's so obnoxious like Randy has no blemishes on his on his face at all
You're so smooth. No wrinkles anywhere anywhere. His face is just tight.
Courtside Karen.
What's her problem?
I don't know.
If you're the husband in this situation, you're just like,
babe, come on. It's LeBron.
But he's the dickhead that allowed this all to happen. He did incite it, but
he's just an asshole at a
Hawks game. He's going to do that every game.
I liked all the people that were just like, I mean, sitting courtside at a Hawks game isn't that tight.
No.
They're the Hawks.
They're terrible.
Watching my boy from Shenandoah.
Shots to the section two.
Draining threes.
Kevin Herter.
This is above my pay grade.
He has one roll and one roll only.
Okay.
Okay.
Shoots the ball.
God, I've never been to ATL.
Should we go?
Should we do a meet up there?
It's tight.
You'd like Buckhead.
Which is like the northern suburb.
Is that like Buckcherry?
No.
I've just driven through it.
I'm on my way to Augusta, Georgia.
Oh, must be nice, man.
It was, yeah.
Must be nice.
It was tight.
I spent some time in Augusta last night finishing up that Tiger dock.
Really?
Yeah.
I don't really feel one way or the other about that doc.
It was fun.
But still, you should go listen to our recap of it on Too Much Dip.
Yeah.
I'm going to listen to that now that I can actually get stuff out of it.
I was a little gun-shy at first because I was like, nah, I've got to go see what's going on.
Tiger, dude.
Eldrick.
It's tough to watch that knowing that he's on the shelf again.
It's all happy at the end.
Yeah.
And you're like,
well, he's got a back issue again.
Yeah, I kind of wish
I would have watched this
two weeks ago
before that news came out.
Yeah.
It should be okay.
Knock on wood.
Back for the Masters.
I mean, he's had like six fusions.
Tough scene.
Well, we got some big news
coming out of the tech world.
Hit me.
Our man Bezos.
He's done.
He's stepping down.
He's stepping down.
I mean, we pick him up.
Is that why?
Is he looking for a new management gig?
I know he's going to work on some other stuff, like his rocket company and all that stuff.
But at the same time, if he wants to be on our board of advisors, we could absolutely make a spot for him, I think.
What's our board currently?
Flounder.
Flounder for sure.
Hashtag Chad.
Who else is on our board?
We haven't sent a board-wide email in a while.
It's hard to say.
Dylan's dad.
Yes.
My mom.
What's the salary of the new guy who's stepping up? Do we know?
Do they even publicize that kind of thing?
No. They probably will at the, whatever the next quarterly earnings call is or something like that,
like compensation package for so-and-so. Cause it's a public company. You have to disclose the compensation for your –
Is this true that as of October 21, 2020, that his annual salary was only $81,840
and most of his wealth just comes from the Amazon shares?
So he only takes the salary?
I love that move.
I don't know anything about doing that.
Have you – I mean, I think for a long time, Tim Cook or Steve Jobs,
they took a dollar was their salary.
Yeah.
That makes sense if you're, I guess, the CEO of a company like that and you have all the shares.
Absolutely.
Their fourth quarter last year, they posted a record $125.6 billion in sales.
Is that good?
Yeah.
$7.2 billion in profit for the fourth quarter.
Profit.
It's a big company.
Successful.
So what kind of numbers is washedmedia.shop doing?
It's not quite
$7.2 billion in profit.
Another question I have. Have you slid
into Mackenzie Bezos' DMs yet?
Yes. She said, thanks, but no
thanks. No, I haven't. I haven't. Have you moved on to
Elon Woods? I'm still
disappointed that Kacey Musgraves has not gotten back
to me. Have you followed up with her?
No.
Yeah, hit her with like a-
I gave her my best line, though.
If that doesn't work, nothing's going to.
What was your best line?
It was Mario handing her her crown back.
Oh, yeah.
That's the one.
If she doesn't respond to that, maybe she's gun shy.
Did you do any text, though, or was it just the image?
You know, I don't recall.
Let's find out.
Because if it's just the image, what's she going't recall let's let's find out because if it's
just the image like i'm pretty sure i crushed whatever i sent her okay it just didn't work okay
i i don't like that he's retiring or not retiring i don't like that he's quitting and just going and
doing a bunch of other really stressful shit i do what i mean what what else is he gonna do
like he has nothing i mean i guess he kind of has the pressure of the world to like
reverse climate change.
That's kind of his big thing he's leaning on.
Yeah, should I respect that he's actually doing other stuff?
But I feel like working on your Rocket company, you're just trying to get in a pissing contest with Elon.
He's in Rocket Mortgage now?
By the way, I crushed this.
I crushed this.
What did you say?
It's Mario.
You dropped this crown, and I said, here you go, queen.
That's my task.
I don't know how she hasn't responded yet. How do you not respond to that?
Why don't you
just respond right now, and all lower-caps just say,
ha-ha, playing hard to get. I see you.
Do the
snowflake, the icy thing.
Yeah, tell her you're an icy boy.
Does she know you're an icy boy?
Do you know I'm an icy boy? Ask her. Yeah, are you aware
that I'm actually
an icy boy? I still don't even know you aware that I'm actually an icy boy?
I still don't even know what that means.
You can send her a picture of Parks or something.
But, hey, we're a package deal.
What do you think?
Yeah, dude, hit Parks with a follow.
I still think it's going to work, man.
Gosh.
The tweet I wanted to bring up from yesterday, I lost who actually said it, so I apologize. But the tweet was, how much do you think Jeff Bezos has to play in a blackjack hand to feel anything
nothing like there's nothing that will happen there's nothing that he could possibly do to
make him feel anything when it comes to money yep nothing absolutely nothing the thrill is
it has to be gone money to him isn't even like a thing anymore it's just a concept that other
people have to deal with and they don't.
K. Joe Rogan. Well, it's just like
for him, what is money at this point?
It's just numbers that go up for
him. Who cares?
He can have whatever he wants.
You can buy. How much
gets your blood flowing in a
blackjack hand at this point?
$100. That's what I was thinking. I was like
three figs and all of a sudden I'm rattled i'm like oh fuck this might be i'm putting 100 bucks on a
crap step i'm like oh yeah if i get into black if i get like a if i'm splitting during like a
blackjack hand and i have like a lot of money down like that's when it's like fuck i'm gonna
go tell sally that i just lost like 400 on one hand. This is going to get real ugly.
That's a lot.
Do I need to get a separate bank account?
I thought you already had a separate bank account.
Are you laundering anything? Once we combine bank accounts soon, do I need to get a separate one?
Oh, like the one that you don't tell her about?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Just call it daddy money?
Ooh.
You should get a joint one with Drew.
It's like the boys' money.
No, Drew would dip into it way too much.
It'd be unfortunate i do think we should still just buy like a i think we should
all just buy like a condo downtown together and just like i'll pay rent on it monthly we'll rent
it out yeah bachelor parties yeah then when we want it be like the the cool landlord who's like
yeah dude i don't care if you guys it says 12 on the website but if you got 16 don't worry about
it cool man oh my god that just gave me a flashback to one of my buddy's bachelor parties where we all went and showed up at the bachelor party and
we were one of some of the first people there so my buddy brady and i were like all right
let's go choose like the best room in the house as as we do yeah yeah and so we were like all
right let's get this bunk room it's like we can chill together we know that nobody else is going
to come in here and then we realized once everybody had arrived at the party that there weren't enough beds for everybody. And so the
bunk room that we were sleeping in was two full-size beds in a bunk. And we ended up having
to share it with two other dudes. So it was four dudes in one bunk bed. Not ideal for a bachelor
party. No. Who messed that up ahead of time? The best man? Dude, fucking Todd. Fucking Todd. Todd,
what's your problem?
You gotta,
bedrooms is one thing,
beds is another thing. Now the camaraderie
that we got out of sleeping
in the same bunk bed together
was,
you can't put a price on that.
That's beautiful.
Yeah, happy for you.
That's beautiful.
Still waiting on my bachelor party.
You guys can throw me one anytime.
I don't know who's,
who does,
that's not us, right?
It's gonna happen.
Should we just do like an Austin one like this weekend? No. Okay. We're gonna go somewhere tight. does. That's not us, right? It's going to happen. Should we just do an Austin one this weekend?
No.
Okay.
We're going to go somewhere tight.
Okay.
That's fine.
Whatever.
Like Amarillo.
Can we invite Bezos?
How convenient would it be if Bezos just happened to be on my bachelor party and we didn't have to worry about anything?
We got Harrison.
We got Musk.
We got Rodian.
We can get somebody.
Is Chris Harrison on our board of directors?
Yeah.
We had a post a long time ago about our board of directors from pre-Brett PB.
It's on Instagram.
Really?
I actually stumbled upon it yesterday.
Remember StumbleUpon?
Yes.
Kind of a legit thing.
I liked it.
It was a really good way to – it was a peak website for wasting time at work.
Yeah.
It was called StumbleUpon and you would select different interests that you had and you would
just like pretty much just get a random website and you'd stumble upon stuff.
Yeah.
And you just click like, no, bored with this one, next one, bored with this one.
No, dude, it was great.
Good business model because the websites could pay StumbleUpon to be like first in line type
of thing.
StumbleUpon for podcasts might work.
StumbleUpon.
Randy, can we cut this? randy take this out this might be the best idea of watching he's ever had outside of calling it bunsen burner media day
one what was dave thinking on that one i don't know that was a miss dave rarely misses but that
was a miss i thought it was a joke but it absolutely wasn't he's like no i just registered
it you actually registered bunsen burner media? So immediately we were like, yeah,
we'll probably have to change that.
So how do we go about doing that?
It just doesn't roll off the tongue.
BBN.
Certainly does not, no.
Bunsen burner, no.
It doesn't work.
No.
It doesn't work.
I don't think Bezos is going to be the CEO
of Bunsen burner media.
But when it comes to washed,
I'll shoot cubes attached and see if Bezos is looking.
Okay.
That's one of those numbers you just kind of have from... Like how I have Colton's number?
Yeah.
Like it's just, yeah, one of those times
when it's just like, why do I have this number?
Just to have it just in case.
Yeah, like when I signed up for Clubhouse,
it was like, oh, follow your contact list.
And it was like, Mia Khalifa.
And I was like, I need to delete that number
what's she up to these days
I don't know
she probably
got in close touch with her
we lost touch
she unfollowed me
so I unfollowed her back
she unfollowed me on Twitter
or on Instagram
but I think she still
follows me on Twitter
let me look
she always scared me
a little bit
just because she's unhinged
she's unhinged
she's unhinged
oh no yeah
no yeah
Randy perked up a little bit when he heard she was unhinged she unfollowed me but to be's unhinged. No, yeah, no. Randy perked up a little bit
when he heard she was unhinged.
She unfollowed me,
but to be fair,
she only follows 204 people.
To be fair.
So I don't take it super personally.
She was always really nice.
That's cool.
Except for that time
she literally slapped you
across the face.
Well, we asked her to.
You do that like
super slow-mo camera?
No, it was just regular speed.
Okay.
It's just weird to me
that that video hasn't come up more.
I feel like we could meme that thing
into oblivion.
It got some play.
She is a big name now.
I bet you she's like investing.
Oh my gosh.
She's a startup fund.
The first time she came on to our...
The first time she appeared...
The first time she appeared on our podcast, she had like 200,000 followers.
Now she has 22.8 million.
Wow.
That's insane.
22.8 million?
Those are numbers.
That's way more than I have.
Yeah.
I think your boy just went from 13.7 to 13.8.
That's big.
Did you?
You're catching up. Add me on the group. To's big. Did you? You're catching up.
Add me on the group.
To who?
What do you have?
16.6.
Yeah, but my engagement.
Down from 16.7, by the way.
Oh, because they got rid of the bots and stuff?
Dude, I don't know.
My engagement's not as good as yours, though.
Oh, my engagement's sick.
Yeah, you got the kid and the dog just firing on all cylinders right now.
Did you see how many likes Dave got on his Rhodes post?
Did he do numbies? Not fair.
It's not fair. Why? He was going
mid-4 figs. He was cooking with gas on that one.
58-57.
Man, he outnumbered my biggest gram
from my wedding. Good for Dave.
Yeah, my biggest gram is like
4,900, something like that. Yeah, 4,929.
He crushed me.
That's solid, though. Well, yeah.
I need to hit two soon.
I got a couple high 18s.
You got to hit the two?
I'm going to hit two.
I'm going to hit a gram.
I only had three grams last year.
It's something I'd like to do moving forward in 2021 is gram more.
I think I might just start getting loose with the grams.
Just getting messy with it?
Well, dude, I'm just doing like one a month.
That's late.
I got to start just doing numbers.
I got to start putting more stuff up.
You have Scarys, so you're warmed up.
I think running the circling back and Sunday Scaries accounts,
I think it gives me the good feeling of posting a gram,
but I just never do it on my personal.
I hardly even scroll my personal feed anymore.
Well, it's because you are the best photographer of this whole thing
i've gotten you in a couple good situations though yeah um you sat across from me intentionally at
the christmas party just so you could get a grandma how come you ever take tight pictures
of me dude you hook everybody else i do take tight pictures of you but then you're always like can i
see your phone before you post anything or before you send it to me i want you to just send them to
me so i can post them you're like hey will you send it to me? I want you to just send them to me so I can post them.
You're like, hey, will you send me those?
Yeah.
I do.
Have you seen your grams from Aspen?
Not Aspen, from Breckenridge?
I feel like I took like half of those.
Dude, when Dylan just went off in a week.
I made you.
You did more grams in a week than I did on a lecture.
You did three in one day.
Yeah.
I'm not afraid.
I'll do it. I'll do it.
I'll straight Kanye it and do like 28 in a day.
I like when you go out of town,
I like when you get
a little,
little substance in you
and all of a sudden
you start just like
rapid firing grams.
Don't say substance
like I'm doing drugs.
Just say alcohol.
Yeah,
I was just talking like
heady beers.
Okay.
Dylan gets a mezcal martini
and I'm like,
look out.
Be careful.
Be careful.
I might have some
mezcal martinis in my future.
Can we hang out this weekend
so I can get a grandma?
Maybe we could wait until we talk about this weekend in fun, Dylan.
Jeez.
Okay.
What's your problem, dude?
I'm sorry.
Here, before we get into our next segment, let's hear from our friends over at Club Cool real quick.
You guys ready for this?
Ooh, I love this.
Hey, it's Barrett.
And Phil.
From the Club Cool podcast.
Are you interested in style, fashion, maybe the hottest new sneakers, latest and greatest in music or art,
then you need to check out Club Cool.
Whether you're ready to chop it up about the newest drops
or you're just looking for simple ways to upgrade your wardrobe,
we've got a little something for everybody.
You can subscribe wherever you get your washed media podcasts
and follow us at Club Cool Pod on Instagram to learn more.
Check out Club Cool, people. Just go subscribe everywhere. Check out Club Cool, people.
Just go subscribe everywhere.
It's Club Cool as found.
The two coolest cats I know, Phil and Barrett.
I had Phil on Sunday Scaries the other day,
and people were very big fans of his voice.
Barrett?
No, Phil.
Oh, Phil.
Well, Barrett as well.
Barrett's been a recurring theme.
Phil's got a lot going for him.
Phil's a hot for him Phil's a
he's a hot dude
Phil's a cool
like you can't be in a bad mood
around Phil
no
he's one of those guys
he's like he has a
he gasses you up
just a contagious
like optimism to him
he's just
he's awesome
he's the best
he's the best
he is
I want to do like a ride along
with Phil
and just
I want him to talk
like Austin architecture
and real estate to me
that sounds great
yeah
just make him your realtor and just make him show you places.
You don't have to pay him anything.
I'm not in the market, but just waste his time.
Oh, I don't want to do that.
Waste his time.
We can go to like showings.
I'll be his assistant.
That sounds fine.
Yeah.
Just don't let him impede on your work here.
Probably won't.
We'll do it on the weekend.
Okay.
That's fine.
Everybody working on the weekend.
Everybody.
Can we do a little new segment?
Yeah.
You know what this is called?
I'm low-key excited for it.
It's called Let's Circle Back On.
I thought we were doing Did You?
No, that's a different segment.
It's But Did You.
Yeah, that's a different one.
We'll introduce that one when Dave gets back.
Gotcha.
Okay, I'm excited.
Here's what we're circling back on.
This is not an old take, but this is a recent take that has not been discussed on the podcast because it happened last night.
No, takes revisited, basically.
Yeah, I want to do this and have it bring up takes from like months ago, but just to get it started, let's just talk about something that hit the TL last night that I have some questions about.
It sort of feels like someone's about to get exposed here.
No, not an exposure, but I just think we need to have a larger conversation regarding something that I don't know if is totally true.
Uh-oh. No, not an exposure, but I just think we need to have a larger conversation regarding something that I don't know if is totally true.
So last night at around 4, I guess yesterday, early yesterday evening, around 4 or 4 p.m. on February 2nd, 2021, a tweet was sent from TweetDeck from our business development guy, Brett.
And it says, we're just out here criminally underrating balsamic vinaigrette, huh?
Are we?
Yeah.
It's underrated.
What's your top five salad dressings go?
Top five salad dressings?
Starting at one.
I would say, have you ever had a white balsamic?
No, I don't do- Because your boy's been making a white balsamic.
I've been actually homemaking my dressing lately.
It's white balsamic with a little cracked pepper in there and some Dijon mustard.
I do like a light dressing like that.
I don't know.
I don't really have salad dressing taste at this point.
Guess what my number one is?
Ranch.
Balsamic vinaigrette.
So you're not criminally underrating it?
I love it.
So Dylan is on board with the movement.
No, I'm the opposite of it.
I think it's appropriately very highly rated.
You're possibly overrating it by putting it number one.
Yes, I'm overrating it.
Mine and Dylan have the same number one salad dressing.
But if we put this out to the masses, it's going to be like ranch and Caesar and Italian.
Okay, no one over 12 picks ranch as their favorite.
Randy said it was his favorite.
Okay, we're going to play.
Randy's 12.
Randy's 12.
Are we playing the game?
You're going to tweet from circling back in real time?
You're going to tell me what crew rolls in?
No, no, no.
Once you become an adult, ranch becomes a dipping sauce and not a dressing.
I agree.
Which doesn't really make sense because I still feel like dipping shit in ranch is still kind of like a childish thing.
But I don't care.
Yeah, I don't care either.
Let's play a little game called smash or pass salad dressings.
Okay?
I'm going to name salad dressings and y'all tell me if you're smashing or passing.
Okay.
Okay?
French dressing.
Pass.
Pass.
Italian dressing.
Oh, smash. Low-key smash. Low-key smash? Low-key smash. Okay. Honey mustard dressing. Pass. Pass. Italian dressing. A little smash.
Low-key smash.
Low-key smash?
Low-key smash.
Okay.
Honey mustard dressing.
Pass.
Pass.
I'm smashing honey mustard dressing.
I know.
I like honey mustard, but not on a salad.
When there's grilled chicken on the salad, honey mustard pairs well with it.
Okay.
Ranch dressing.
Well, I'm smashing.
Pass as a dressing.
I'm smashing as a dipping sauce.
I'm going to pass regular cheap ranch dressing,
but if it's like buttermilk ranch,
homemade by the restaurant and or my mom, I'm in.
Why does restaurant ranch hit so much harder?
Because they toss it in the salad,
and they don't give it to you on the side.
That's why it's so good.
Pine house ranch dressing is really good.
It's the go.
Thousand Island dressing.
Pass.
I'm sure you can spend the night.
You might just have a little...
Are you hooking up, though?
No, like one night.
One night stand.
Yeah.
I am going to pass on Thousand Island.
I don't think it's bad, but I'm never going to get it over any other dressing.
It's too many islands.
Blue cheese dressing.
Smash.
Situational.
It's like a pinch hitter.
I've grown to appreciate blue cheese
dressing as I've gotten older.
I enjoy a good blue cheese dressing, especially on
a wedge salad. Blue cheese on a wedge salad is pretty
hard to beat. Give me crumbly blue cheese over the dressing.
That's fine.
That's fine. Or, you know
it's a good blue cheese
dressing when you can just
tell that there's just giant soft chunks of blue cheese. I do love a good blue cheese dressing when you can just, like, you can tell that there's just giant soft chunks of blue cheese.
I do love a good stinky cheese.
You know what I'm saying?
Do the stanky cheese.
Do the stanky.
Okay.
Okay, last one.
You ready for this one?
Smash the glass.
Catalina?
Green Goddess.
I don't know what that is.
Who's that?
I'm smashing the Green Goddess.
What is that?
The Green Goddess dressing?
You never had that?
No.
What's in it, dog?
I don't know.
I just find out.
The Jolly Green Giant.
Green Goddess is just one of those dressings that like sally buys and i eat but i don't
actually know what's in it uh green goddess is a salad dressing typically containing mayonnaise
sour cream sure shirvel shirvel i don't know how to say that word chives anchovy tarragon lemon
juice and pepper i mean it sounds like a tzatziki or uh aioli i almost feel like it's almost like
tzatziki like combined with like ca Caesar and they made it into a dressing.
But that green goddess would be hit and different.
She's a goddess.
Yeah, I'm totally unfamiliar.
I just don't feel like
we're criminally underrating balsamic.
It's criminally underrated.
If it's anywhere below two
on people's list,
it's underrated.
That's unfair.
I'll give you a creamy salad dressing at one or two,
and balsamic better be the other.
If it gets to three, it's underrated, criminally.
In anybody's.
I feel like every restaurant you go to,
it's like, here's some brussies with a balsamic drizzle.
I'm not getting brussies with balsamic drizzle at a restaurant, honestly.
Why not?
I don't know.
And I'm taking the brussies that have the most balsamic drizzle at a restaurant, honestly. Why not? I don't know. And I'm taking the brussies that have the most balsamic drizzle on them.
I'd rather fuck with some buffalo collie or something like that.
If I'm going to get veggies off that aren't in a salad.
I made brussies last night.
Hard smash on those.
Have you tried my brussie recipe yet?
No.
Doing it in the pan?
No.
I will, though.
I will.
I'll send you the recipe.
Do. I know you're like the brussies guy. I'm doing it in the pan? No. I will though. I will. I'll send you the recipe. Do.
I know you're like
the brussies guy.
I don't want to impede
on your territory.
The way I do them,
it's really simple
but they're good.
But I know they could
probably get better.
Don't you hit them
with a little honey too?
I do.
Yeah.
See the honey,
that's where I miss it.
I just get a little.
I need to start doing that.
Yeah, I kind of wild out
after I take them out of the oven
and just pop.
Get a little honey on there.
Oh, you do? Okay. Yeah. You could say that we're crimin take them out of the oven and just pop, get a little honey on there. Oh, you do?
Okay.
Yeah.
You could say that we're criminally underrating Green Goddess because you guys don't even know what it is.
I've never heard of it.
Yeah, I'm totally confused on that one.
Okay.
I'm going to bring some in for you guys.
I'm going to get tasters.
I don't know what to do at Tex-Mex restaurants when they're like, okay, do you want the cilantro vinaigrette or the Southwestern Ranch?
I'm like, I don't know.
What kind of dressing are you supposed to get on a Tex-Mex salad?
Like, it's not a salad anymore.'s just just give me salsa was salsa does the same thing to me though when they're like do you want the uh
like the poblano do you want the the green the verde i'm like i don't just give me the red one
like the mild red one please is it because you don't know i don't know anything about the spanish
words no i don't you don't know what verde don't know anything about it. Do you not know the Spanish words? No, I don't.
You don't know what verde means?
It's green.
I know that one's green.
But like...
Tomatillo?
Yeah, when they hit me with a tomatillo, I'm like, can I have the...
I'll take pico, please.
That works too.
Pico de gallo.
Yeah, you crushed that.
Give me some gallo.
I know it's gallo, Will.
Dave loved himself a wedge salad.
Oh, that dude.
I like just listening to him talk about wedge salads.
That's his favorite thing to get at Perry's.
He goes there for the wedge salad.
It's like they got all this dope shit, Dave, but he's like, yeah, I just want the wedge.
Dave's absolutely cocky with those wedge salads at steakhouses.
He wants all the blue cheese and stuff on them.
He's just reckless with it.
He reinvigorated my love for a wedge salad.
My mom used to make them for me all the time and I miss it.
It's just a wedge of salad.
It's crazy.
But they're so cold.
Yeah.
I love it.
Icy boys.
I love it.
They are icy boys.
Man, should we talk a little
this weekend and fun?
Is it already time?
Well, I mean,
we're kind of breezing
through stuff today
but I figured,
you know,
we got a lot in the hopper.
Okay.
You know what we have?
We have a new theme song
for this weekend of fun.
Ooh.
Are you guys ready for this?
I don't know if you guys
have heard this song before.
Let me hear that song.
That's not how that goes.
Baby, make your booty go
ba-ba-boom.
You ready for this?
It's our new intro music.
This is a big day.
Dave's going to be really upset
that he missed this.
Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha. Oh, welcome, y'all.
Oh, welcome, y'all.
Gosh, maybe in the house.
Oh, Dylan, what are you doing this weekend in fun?
Are you playing the whole thing?
Are you talking over it?
I'm going to turn it down a little bit.
We need the instrumental version.
Dude, I love it.
I think you should let it ride.
Okay, what am I doing this weekend?
That's a great question.
Friday night I will have parks.
We're going to have great weather the entire weekend, right?
Pretty sure that's what it looks like.
Stupid good weather. It's peak weather weekend.
I'm running out of things to do with parks because it's COVID.
We can't exactly go do wild-ass shit right now.
Just take him back to the dinosaur park.
Yeah, I was going to say run back dinosaur park. Yeah, I've been so many times. We can't exactly go do wild-ass shit right now. Just take him back to the dinosaur park. Yeah, it was just a run-back dinosaur park.
Yeah, I've been so many times.
It's not exactly close.
You know where I went yesterday where you could take him?
Where?
The dinosaur car wash.
Oh, yeah.
You went yesterday?
I went yesterday.
You didn't see my clean-ass whip out there?
I want a full-service car wash, though.
That's my only problem.
They'll scrub your front while you're waiting for the other one.
I need a vacuum on the inside.
I need to wipe my dash down, all that stuff, you know?
Yeah, but don't you also want to entertain your son by taking him to a place where they
literally have a T-Rex spraying water out of its mouth onto your car?
Yes.
Just make sure you don't have your sunroof open because you'll get sopping.
Who does that?
Open their sunroof?
A lot of people.
That's what they're for.
It's for sun.
Well, like, leave it open.
Sunroof?
Sunroofs in Texas are kind of like hit or miss.
Dude, I took my car to the place on BK.
I forgot what it's called.
Frontline, first line? It doesn't matter.
Really good spot.
They left my driver door
open last time. They sent it through the wash.
Like, what are you guys doing?
Hold on, what?
It wasn't all wide open.
What?
They left it three or four inches cracked.
I was like,
guys,
shut the door.
And I saw them like,
they tried to like get in there
with towels real quick
and dry it all down
before I could see
what had happened.
Anyway,
that's neither here nor there.
So I can complain
about something too.
Should we do a low-key steamer
right now?
Is it low-key steam?
So I left my car
at this place.
I wanted to,
I was leaving town
for a long weekend and I wanted to get my car cleaned and detailed.
And so we hit up our boy who gives us a little discount, and they did it.
They detailed my car, but they left a large film of this oily substance all over every single part of the car.
Like the inside?
Everything was just a little oily.
And it got to the point where I was like, okay, this is actually rubbing off on shit.
Like my shoes were dirty from the oil that they left in there.
I'm like, do I call them and tell them this?
Like they're not going to redo it for me.
They're not going to be like, oh, bring it in.
We'll scrub off all the shit we just laid down in your car.
So I just like, I've just been dealing with it.
Put my golf clubs in the back and like my travel bags all like dirty now.
That's very strange.
I'm kind of annoyed by it yeah
i can see why he made my life dirtier my car appears to be cleaner it's a little shiny and
stuff dirty boy what's the problem i don't fucking know how to get a detail if you got a guy i don't
know if you want my guy no he's oily guy yeah anyway friday i don't fired you're fired picking
up parks from school at uh like 240 and then I want to do something with him,
but I'm not sure yet.
So 10 minutes after dentist time?
10 minutes after dentist time.
2.40.
That's early for elementary, right?
I was like a 4 o'clock boy.
I don't know.
Our high school got out at 4.10, I remember.
What?
What?
Is that late?
Dude, that's dark outside.
We got out at 2.49.
Yeah.
What?
2.49.
I think we're the same thing.
What time did you start? 2.20. Why 2.49 instead of 2.49. I think we're the same thing. What time did you start?
2.20.
Why 2.49 instead of 2.50?
Because it's just the way it worked out.
What?
All of our classes were on off times.
It was like, oh, 11.37 is when lunch starts.
It was really weird.
That's very weird.
How much time did you have between classes?
I can remember all my times.
How many minutes did you have between classes?
Well, we had block scheduling for part of it.
And then we had, so like, A, B, and then we had 10 minutes between classes then.
Yeah.
Then it changed to five, I think.
Oh, that's unpopular.
They gave us, like, yeah, I think we went from six to four at one point.
And I was like, this is not enough time to get from one side of school to the other side.
If I'm in gym class, like, there's no way I can shower and get to pre-calc.
I would assume it would take 45 seconds to walk across your high school campus, though.
It's very small, right?
It's not big.
It's not big.
Ours is big.
We had a big boy campus.
Yeah, we know yours was big, Brett.
You guys had, like, a laundromat on there.
It's just in the locker room.
Swag.
It was cool.
Yeah, 410.
That's insane.
It's a full-time job.
Yeah.
What time did you start?
8.30-ish.
Holy shit.
Oh, so you had the late start then.
We started at 8.00. 8.00 on the dot every day.
7.49 to 2.20.
Maybe even a little bit later than 8.30.
I don't remember.
You had a weird schedule.
That's weirder than mine.
We did 8.00 to about 2.45, 2.49 I think was the actual time.
Maybe 2.47.
There's a lot of days when Parks rides a bus and he doesn't usually ride it anymore,
but they pick him up at 650.
Crazy early.
Yeah, I was at 651.
I got a white glass up.
Walk him out there.
It's not fun.
Anyway.
You stand out there with a coffee and a robe.
Coffee's not going yet, but I just throw on a coat,
and then I just get right back in bed for a little bit.
What would Parks think if he just knew that you were just climbing right back
into bed after he gets sent off to school?
I don't know.
I'd probably cry.
Yeah, I don't tell him about that.
My parents just kick me out the door.
They're like, get out of here.
We don't want to see you.
So Friday, I'm not sure yet.
TBD.
You have the homie Friday.
Yes.
Do you have the homie all weekend?
I do not have the homie Saturday or Sunday.
Saturday, I would love to swing sticks, which I know that's a big statement coming from me.
I haven't been swinging sticks lately, but I want to get out there with the boys, mix it up.
Klein said he can't find a tee time.
That's really unfortunate.
Based on the group chat, I don't think that's happening.
I know, man.
So I want to link somehow with the boys.
Let's link.
Let's do something. What are you doing, Brett? Can we do mats? Hold on. I'm not link. Let's do something.
What are you doing, Brett?
Can we do Matt?
Hold on.
I'm not finished.
Can we do Matt's or something?
So do you want me to start my weekend in fun?
Oh, I want you to get a gram of me off.
Or you get a picture of me and I'll get the gram off.
Let's do that.
You want me to get you off this weekend?
Please.
Okay.
And then Sunday is Super Bowl Sunday.
And I have no idea.
I might just watch it at home.
Oh, shit.
I forgot Sunday was Super Bowl.
No plans for the Super Bowl right now.
Super Bowl wasn't last week?
No.
They get, like, rain delayed or something?
I guess I'm about to find out if you guys have Super Bowl plans.
So go ahead, Brett.
Well, if you want some, I mean, let's get some.
I got Caroline's in town this weekend, so we'll be chilling.
But, yeah, Matt's, Super Bowl.
I got to make my buffalo chicken dip.
That's always a Super Bowl Sunday thing.
But yeah, other than that, we have some lunch beers tomorrow, which will be fun.
Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.
Shout out to the squad over at Poncho.
So we're doing some lunch beers Friday.
We've got nothing.
Did someone say lunch beers?
We're doing some lunch beers.
Do you still have the Dave Matthews one?
I'm not going to lie The soundboard's really shaping up lately
Really shaping up
It's bringing heat right now
I think I'm hitting the domain
To get something on Saturday
For a little shopping action
Not like aggressively shopping.
You going to like a jewelry store?
No, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no.
Wow, okay.
That's where I got my wedding ring.
No, I think we're doing like St. Bernard.
I was going to say, you're going to like Filson or something, like getting a shacket?
Yeah.
Oh, maybe I'll get a shacket and shacket cookie this weekend.
You know what?
If you do, I'll buy a shacket too.
I'm a little upset because the shacket that I was going to buy last winter, they no longer make it in the color that I want.
And so I'm kind of just drowning right now.
God, shackets are really taking off.
Dude, they're having a moment.
Yeah.
I can't get on board.
Why?
What's your problem, dude?
You don't like shirts?
You don't like jackets?
We have no swag.
I'm not going to look as good as Dylan.
Oh, we forgot your swag list.
Fuck.
I'm not going to look as good as Dylan.
Is Brett's drip down?
Get your drip up, dog.
I don't want to do this anymore.
Just go find a shacket at the Domain this weekend.
Try it on.
Send a pic to the squad, and we'll see.
Okay.
I'm actually going to get a pair of sneakers.
Really? Like Yeezys? No, like white NMDs or something like that. I'm not that swaggy. squad and then we'll see okay i'm actually gonna get a pair of sneakers really like easies no like
getting white like white nmds or something like that i'm not that sweaty all the nomads yeah i
don't know if that is the case is that what they're called i think nmd means nomad i think
news to me are you sure you didn't just make this up in your head no i'm not sure adidas nomad i'm
gonna need club cooled away on this bad i have no clue
bear watch he's a good name for a shoe though yeah it's not a bad name nomads like they walk
around you know roger federer just released a new shoe really i don't want to cop it it's made by
you like the federer stand a little bit a little bit yeah when it comes to tennis like sampras was
my childhood favorite growing up for obvious reasons. And yeah, then I just transitioned into Federer.
And so I like watching all of them.
I like watching anybody pretty much.
But if it's a Wimbledon final, you can catch me cheering for Feds.
I'm down with that.
Feds has – he might have the tightest list of sponsors of any athlete.
Google is inconclusive, by the way.
I typed in Adidas Nomad.
It does pull up the NMD shoe, but who knows?
I guess we can just call them Nomads now.
I think I will.
Who are Federer's sponsors?
Like Rolex.
Yeah.
Longinus.
Credit Suisse.
Credit Suisse.
Mercedes-Benz.
Yeah.
That's a good one.
That's not a bad one.
Wilson.
Yeah, he just, you know that on-sneaker brand I wear him once in a while?
Swiss made?
That's how they got him.
Dude, more like off.
No, dude.
Come on.
You get it?
Nope.
What if he's like Ghirardelli, though?
That'd be tight.
Like a chocolate brand?
Yeah.
Are they even Swiss?
Ghirardelli?
Yeah.
Or Ghirardelli.
I don't know.
I don't know which one.
Louboutin.
Oh.
I'm shocked you didn't know that.
No, I did know that, though.
Absolutely stunned. I did know that.
It's just my brain, when I see the word, I just go straight into Louboutin instead of Louboutin.
Ghirardelli is from San Francisco.
Yeah, I was going to say, that's where their big thing is.
But their parent company is Swiss.
They call Ghirardelli the San Francisco treat, actually.
You guys aware of that?
Chef Boyardee.
Are you kidding me?
No, they don't.
Yes, I am kidding you.
Oh.
You ever had Rice-A-Roni, dude?
Yeah.
I feel like the homie would love Rice-A-Roni.
It's so bad for you, though.
He hates almost everything.
Same.
He was.
He's just like his dad.
Just do dinosaur nuggies every night.
Sounds good, actually.
It's become a problem.
Actually, you know what?
I got some ritual vitamins.
This is a free spot for them.
Whoa.
Ritual vitamins in the mail for him.
Okay.
Oh, kid's one.
Kid, kid, yeah, kid little gummies.
The homie's officially doing two-a-days?
Yeah.
You've tried the gummies, right?
I haven't.
How do you not try the gummy before you give it to the homie?
Oh, we haven't gotten them yet.
Oh.
I will.
You have to try it.
I need to report back.
Because if their regular stuff smells so good, then the gummies must hit different.
You know they hit.
Oh.
Sally has some gummy vitamins and they smell so good.
Really?
Yeah.
I'm a men's one-a-day guy.
Here's the key, though.
You actually take two.
It's false advertising.
Mm-hmm. So, just saying. That's interesting. Yeah.day guy. Here's the key, though. You actually take two. It's false advertising. Mm-hmm.
So, just saying.
That's interesting.
Yeah.
We should do something for the Super Bowl.
Anybody want to link?
I can talk about my weekend at fun, and we can see where you fit in.
I don't really want to watch it at a place.
We undersold one of Roger Federer's biggest sponsors, by the way.
He has a 10-year deal with Uniqlo.
Uniqlo, I don't know how you even say it.
Worth $300 million.
Wow.
That's a good endorsement deal.
Do we have any ad deals that are worth $300 million?
Jeez.
Sorry to put the curtain here.
Carry the one.
No.
You should pursue that in 2021.
Not yet.
300 mil?
Yeah.
One day.
Dude, throw it out there
The worst they can do is say no
Sure
Right?
Well, that's just the
In negotiating, right?
You set the ceiling and the floor
I'll put it up there
So the floor will automatically be driven up
That's what they tell you in negotiation class
There you go
Yeah, put our
The floor is the ceiling
Presenting sponsor
Ceiling is the roof
Ceiling is the roof
Too much debt
Presenting sponsor
$300 million
Who says no? I don't know They can counter all they want The floor is the ceiling. Presenting sponsor. Ceiling is the roof. Ceiling is the roof. Too much debt. Presenting sponsor. $300 million.
Who says no?
I don't know.
They can counter all they want.
I actually heard something about a podcast yesterday, a certain podcast that got a certain dollar amount for a year sponsorship that I'm going to be aggressively pursuing based
on their number of downloads and our number of downloads.
Let's go.
Go.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let of downloads. Let's go. Go.
Welcome to Wilmots.
I'll say this.
If you're a cash app, keep an eye out for an email from Wilmots. Let's go.
Wow.
The thing about cash app is it's an app for cash.
Think about it, dude.
It's crazy.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
I think you can buy Bitcoin through it, too.
Welcome to Wilmots.
All right, your boy.
What do you got?
I got big news for the squad.
Whoa.
You guys ready for this?
You booked us a tea time.
Micah is no longer in ketosis.
Oh, it's February.
It's February.
That means Micah wants to have some drinks.
He wants to munch.
Whoa.
He wants to have some drinks.
I've never gotten hammered with Micah.
Let's fucking go.
I legitimately might just dedicate my entire weekend to hanging out with Micah.
Because Micah and I have been quarantine buddies this entire time.
And so having casual beers with him throughout quarantine was a very nice thing.
The second he started doing Sober January, it was like he just exited my life.
And so there's been mats floated out there.
We've had a little Super Bowl chatter about maybe going off on some Super Bowl food.
Let me say this to you.
If you link with Micah and I don't get a notification from you,
our friendship is going to be greatly altered.
Go to the Apple store.
Make sure that you're getting texts.
I'm going to charge it up.
I'm a full battery all weekend.
I'm going to make sure I'm in peak coverage area.
I'm going to be sitting by it waiting for you.
Here, I'm sending you a test text right now.
Okay.
Beep, bop, boop, bop, beep.
Whoop.
Did you get it? You just did the noise so well. was such a good noise it's not coming through oh i'm sorry i'm sorry
so yeah it's it's micah time weekend of micah he doesn't know that i'm just gonna like attach
myself to him this weekend we are going to attach ourselves to him i can hear when micah goes to the
dog park because his dog charlie just starts barking out of excitement the second she gets
out there and she just goes and tears out and the set dog Charlie just starts barking out of excitement the second she gets out there.
And she just goes and tears out.
And Rosie knows it too now.
So the second I hear Charlie going, Rosie just like cocks her head and she's like, let's fucking party.
Let's party.
Dude, it's time to link.
Casa de Micah is going to be popping this weekend.
So I will say we have not tossed out making food for the Super Bowl.
All we've tossed out is actually just buying food from somewhere
and just having an absolute spread.
I want chicken wings.
Some spread.
There's some wings that I'm looking at from a restaurant in Austin.
I'm not going to name them because they actually wronged me one time when I was there.
But I still support them because their food is torch.
Fresno chili wings.
Dude, I love the idea of Micah doing a month of Whole30 or whatever he's doing,
keto, all that shit,
and destroying it the first weekend after.
I love the idea.
Yeah, he's looking good too.
Is he?
Yeah.
Dude, let's put seven pounds on him this weekend.
I want to.
I have to.
If I don't put seven pounds on him this weekend, I'm going to be upset.
I haven't tried to get Will Black out in a minute.
If that's on the table, I'm going to do that.
You're going to smash or pass?
Hope you like Fernette, dude.
Hope you like Fernette.
Actually, yeah, let's buy some Fernettes.
If we buy a bottle of Fernettes and bring it to Mike's apartment,
he will get absolutely wasted.
I think I want that in my life.
I do, too.
I do, too.
Sounds like we have plans.
Tight.
Golf is out the window after our exploratory stuff,
so I just don't think it's going to work.
Is Klein coming?
Or was that dependent on golf?
We could get him here.
I feel like it was dependent on golf, but I do feel like if we lured him in, we could try.
If I say we have a table at Ranch 616, Klein will be here tomorrow.
Klein is highly susceptible to peer pressure.
Oh, yeah.
We could get him here.
I've never seen someone willing to get in a car for two and a half hours just for, like, a dinner.
I know.
It's like, dude, how bored are you right now?
But I love it.
He gets me fired up.
And it's always a great excuse with Sally.
It's like, hey, Klein came all the way from town.
The boy's got to go run at Matt's El Rancho.
Yeah, that's true.
He does the thing too where he has no problem.
He's going to respond to that text in two minutes.
He has no problem if like coming in on a Friday and leaving on a Saturday morning.
Yeah.
That's like when he crashed at my house the other weekend for the golf.
And I was like,
so yeah,
like what do you want to do tomorrow?
Like he's like,
no,
I'm leaving.
I'm like,
you're leaving in the morning?
He's like,
yeah,
I'm just coming down.
I got to go back up.
I'm like,
oh my God,
come on.
He's always like,
he's like,
do you want me to snag you
when I get into town
and go to the course together?
I'm like,
what?
So you're just driving in
for this round of golf
and then heading home
like tomorrow morning sleeping on Brett's couch? I love it. I do too. My couch gets hot in the morning together. I'm like, what? So you're just driving in for this round of golf and then heading home tomorrow morning,
sleeping on Brett's couch?
I love it.
I do, too.
My couch gets hot in the morning, though.
The sun beats down on it.
I'm sorry, Klein.
It's good for morning coffee.
Welcome to Wilmots.
Welcome to Wilmots.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Oh, man.
Brett, do you have any breaking news for us on this fine Wednesday?
Yeah. Kind of a light day on the internet, man. Brett, do you have any breaking news for us on this fine Wednesday? Yeah, kind of a light day on the internet, honestly, which was surprising.
But anyway, I have a couple things.
Dylan, would you like to go Big Cats or The Bachelor?
The Bachelor, please.
You were of Matt James.
Yes.
You were of Matt James' friend.
I thought it was Mike. Who? Matt were of Matt James' friend. I thought it was Mike.
Who?
Mike James.
Matt James' friend, Tyler C.
Oh, the hot Tyler, yes, of course.
Hot Tyler.
Who doesn't know hot Tyler?
Apparently.
Smash that.
Friend of the program, Chicks in the Office, Ria and Fran, had Matt on their podcast, Chicks in the Office, and apparently Tyler C. makes an appearance on the show.
And not only does he make an appearance, he falls for somebody there.
Klein responded to your text, by the way.
Did he?
Yeah, he said he's aroused.
Sorry, Klein, if I exposed you.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Yeah.
So Tyler C. is going to end up falling for a chick on the show here.
Yeah.
I saw that headline earlier.
Who do we think?
Is this the first indication we've had of this? are there spoilers out there if we try to find them right
now um the consensus would say yes so i'm not going to try i read a potential spoiler the other
night i was just doing my bachelor research for the show and i think i've read a potential spoiler
we'll see uh-oh had nothing to do with tyler. I need to know who Tyler C. might end up with.
Let me throw a wild name out there.
I have a wild name, too.
Whoa.
She didn't make it past night one.
Sana?
But in my opinion, Sana.
Sana?
She's so cool, man.
Is that just intuition, or is that like a...
No, that's me thinking that she's extremely attractive,
and she was sent home night one for some weird reason.
I think... I don't hate your theory.
What about Sarah?
I think Piper.
What about Sarah?
I got Piper.
What about Sarah?
What about Sarah?
Isn't she MGK's chick?
G-Easy.
G-Easy.
Yeah, he's not doing...
No, Tyler's not going to get caught up in Sarah's web of celebrity hopping.
Oh, no.
He could.
I would be very upset.
I would lose a lot of respect for Tyler C. if he went with Sarah.
Okay.
I have the utmost respect for Tyler C. right now.
I'm just going to do it.
I'm just going to do it.
What?
You're going to see if it's out there?
I'm just going to do it.
Don't do it.
Just blink twice if it's out there.
Wait.
Oh, you're reading.
Oh, you're finding out.
Do they reveal it?
They don't reveal it, do they?
No.
Okay.
We're safe.
Okay.
Okay.
I don't want to know.
I need the fewest amount of spoilers in my life that I can possibly get.
What's the big cat news?
Well, Will, are you familiar with Jaguars?
Jaguar.
Yes, I am.
They're cats.
And not only a Jaguar. That was a combination. I said Jaguar. Not for pound the toughest of the cats, I am. They're cats. And not only a Jaguar.
That was a combination.
Not for pound the toughest of the cats.
Louboutin.
Correct.
A Jaguar and ocelot were spotted roaming in southern Arizona.
The Arizona Game and Fish Department says a Jaguar and an ocelot were spotted again near Tucson.
So these things are just rolling deep? They're in Arizona now. There's a jaguar and an ocelot were spotted again near Tucson.
So these things are just rolling deep?
They're in Arizona now.
Okay.
Where are they typically found in the world?
They say the mountains of central Mexico are a pretty good bet.
Sometimes they sneak up across the border.
Okay.
Only seven jaguars have been spotted in the U.S. since 1996.
No shit.
I did not know that.
That is actually kind of mind-blowing.
Southeastern Arizona and southwestern New Mexico, according to the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service, wildlife officials believe the animals migrate across the border to Sonora, Mexico,
where the nearest breeding population of jaguars is located.
Mm-hmm.
Huh?
Sonora.
Mm-hmm.
Another song? Shake Sonata. Another song.
Shake, sonata.
Shake it all the time.
Would you stop?
Shake, shake, shake, sonata.
See, Randy's liking it.
Hot Randy's liking it.
Don't call him Hot Randy.
It's Hot Randy.
His head's going to get too big.
I know.
Then he's going to go on hinge
and be sweating.
He's going to clean up on hinge.
He's going to be like,
is my hinge broken?
Everyone's matching with me.
Must be nice, dude.
Hinge, two days. You've got to beat the record, me. Must be nice, dude. Hinge, two days.
You're going to beat the record, Randy.
Batting 1,000.
Yeah, Brett killed it.
I was literally on it for two days.
Damn.
First match.
Success story.
Shouts to Caroline.
Good for you.
Thank you.
I kind of want to mob with these dudes.
The Jaguar?
Jaguar?
Yeah.
I can't say it right now.
I'm combining Jaguar and Jaguar.
How do you say the word R-U-R-A-L?
Rural.
I'm mainly asking for myself.
I just dropped the second R.
Rural.
I said rural.
How do you pronounce that sauce that people have that comes in a brown bottle with brown paper wrapping?
Oh, I say Worcestershire.
Worcestershire. Oh. Dylan. Worcestershire. Worcestershire.
Oh, Dylan.
Worcestershire.
What's proper?
I'm not really sure.
I've always just said Worcestershire.
Worcestershire?
Worcestershire.
As a kid, I just said Worcestershire.
Just hoping that nobody would even call me out for it.
They didn't clean that name up.
What do you even use that shit for?
Is it criminally underrated?
It is.
It is.
I put it in burgers usually.
Yeah, burgers.
It's pretty good.
It used to be like steak sauce in the 1920s.
Nah.
Ted Williams gets done with his ball game.
Give me some Worcestershire.
Nah.
Drag it across the grill.
I want that thing still mooing with the Worcestershire sauce on it.
Stop.
Please stop.
We got anything else today boys
I'm excited about the ocelot and jaguar
yeah we gotta get out there
I don't know why like
I feel like finding these animals
this is gonna be a terrible take
so here we go
oh great I can't wait
between like Bigfoot and jaguars
and like rare animals
we have drones now that you can just attach a thermal
camera to i feel like it should be easy to find these suckers right randy wants to say something
what's wrong what randy why is it why is it so hard to attach a thermal camera to a drone that
you can just run all over the place. The military does it.
They seem to be doing okay.
Why can't we find these things, man?
Why can't we just let nature be nature, Brett?
Damn, nature.
Brett, why can't we find a single skeleton of a Bigfoot?
Because they bury their dead, Dylan.
They don't.
How do you know that?
How do you know that?
Dude, we find dinosaur bones that are millions of years old.
Yeah, because they-
Yeah, but there are people that go to college for that to go find
those bones. There's no Bigfoot degree.
Cryptozoology.
Oh, good point. Yeah, I guess they exist.
I think they're...
God.
Show me what? Show me a femur.
Like, just one, you know?
I'll show you a fucking femur. You want to see the biggest bone
in my body?
What's wrong with you, dude? I don't know.
Sorry.
The smash or pass of the salad dressing has got me all horned off.
Smash or pass has got to be a recurring.
Just with very inanimate objects that might not go on salads.
Right, right.
Oh, you know what else is tight?
I re-consolidated some higher interest debt this weekend.
See, your boy's financially healthy going into the weekend.
Wow, that's smashing, baby.
I do. Hard smash on that.
That's tight. Oh, yes.
Oh, yes. Yeah, I'm going to the steakhouse.
Hand me that A1, please.
Not bad, A1.
A1's good. I'm putting
it out there. I've never had A1.
I don't think I have either.
You just gotta buy a really shitty steak from the
grocery store and just put some
steak sauce on it to make it taste like steak.
I know people don't like that take,
but I've been known
to do it when I'm just craving steak and don't feel like breaking the bank.
What do you put on your tube steak?
My tube steak?
There's usually a green goddess on there.
Okay.
I think it's time to leave.
Let's have a go.
I think it's time to go.
Bye.
Oh, welcome, y'all.
Wash media in the house.
It's happy hour, babe.
Let's go.
When the Texas sun is just too hot to bear. hour bed. Let's go! Three little birds, dark rum floaters all day long Welcome to Wilmot
Austin's finest tiki bar and ocean grill
Welcome to Wilmot
Come on down, drink on up, get your fill
Welcome to Wilmot
The breeze is always cool and the deals are always hot
Welcome to Real Moms
Fun in the sun, happy hour
Around the clock, clock, clock
Welcome to Real Moms
When you're here, you're family
Come on, yeah, go
Ha ha ha ha ha Dave feeling the will in the house
Brett and Randy too
Come on, yeah, let's go
Look what you did, you little jerk