Circling Back - Red Carpet & Red Stripes
Episode Date: February 10, 2020Breaking down the most notable moments from The Oscars, analyzing the first weekend of the new XFL, and Dave's Combat Sports Minute. We also do some Brett's Breaking News spanning from transatlantic f...lights to Jeff Bezos being sneaky jacked. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (14:30) The Oscars (38:17) Sup with the XFL? (48:02) Dave's Combat Sports Minute (59:37) Ski Jumping Is LIT (1:04:35) Brett's Breaking News Zapier: www.zapier.com/circlingback (14-day free trial) Honey: www.joinhoney.com/circlingback (STUPID savings on pretty much everything) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
all right we're back circling back podcast coming to you live from the lodge
All right, we're back.
Circling Back Podcast coming to you live from the lodge.
My name's Will DeFries to my right, David Ruff.
A lot of people checking their podcast application to see if they've got this pod slowed down.
Turns out we just like our music slow, but our cars go faster.
Really?
We screwed it.
In the V12.
My cousin, Big Shasta.
We did.
We did.
New music. New music Monday. New intro alert. and screwed it. My cousin, Big Shasta. We did. We did. New music.
New music Monday.
New intro alert.
I feel like I'm sipping lean right now.
Why?
Really?
Are we sure that this is coffee in this mug?
A lot of people have said this is the lean of podcasts. That would be weird if the DeLonghi, like, just for some reason went rogue and just started pouring codeine into your cup as opposed to the coffee that we brewed.
Right.
Yeah, that'd be strange.
There's situations where that might be really convenient.
I don't know what situation that would be, but you're right.
What if I have strep throat?
Good point.
There you go.
Yeah.
Does it help tendonitis?
It's hard to say.
You've had the longest bout of tendonitis, I think, in history.
No, it's gone.
It's gone.
I can confirm. I still have some lingering effects No, it's gone. It's gone. I can confirm.
I still have some lingering effects from my blood blister.
Oh, man.
I did find the source of it.
It was from the – I pinched my finger in the bathroom prior to –
What were you doing there?
That far door, stall door is messed up.
Not to at the office complex, but the far door of the stall might be the worst door of all time, and you
have to actually shove over part of the stall in order to actually lock it.
It's a problem.
And I pinched my finger when I did that.
Ooh.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, I need to sanitize that.
Yeah, that raises some serious bacterial implications, but I think you're good.
I will also say, don't go in there today.
Okay. Don't go in there today. Okay.
Don't go to the far stall today.
Someone do something dirty?
I went in there because the urinals are so close to each other.
And Dylan and I went to the bathroom at the same time.
I decided to use the stall.
Someone did the unspeakable.
Shotgun blast?
Yeah.
Let's stop it right there, sir.
All I'm saying is just avoid it if you can today.
Yep, will do.
Thank you.
Did they do the poop shotgun video?
It was essentially the poop shotgun.
Hey, did y'all see this video speaking of poop shotguns?
Did y'all see this BYU mascot dunk?
Yes.
Is this real?
Yes.
This is the greatest thing I've ever seen.
I don't know how they launched him so far, man.
From the three beyond the arc.
We have to try this with you, right?
No.
I'm not a flyer you're not dude he gets air in that video he's so he's so high you were gonna say
spinner weren't you i was brad i mean he almost like bangs his head on the rim he gets so far up
there how long did that take to like coordinate everything like did they have a foam pit that they were doing this into?
Surely.
That's how you got to practice.
Or just on one of those big mats that they used,
those gym, like, gymnastics mat things.
I don't know.
I like the idea of him just being like, nah, throw me.
I don't really know what I'm talking about, so.
It was tight, though.
It's one of the greatest mascot achievements I've ever seen.
They should have a mascot dunk contest at the All-Star game.
I agree.
Tell me that wouldn't be really watchable.
Is BYU the mascot that's famous for dancing during...
Yes.
Okay.
I only know that because of how it's funny because it's BYU.
Right.
Wait, what's their mascot?
The cooter? That's right. Okay. Right. Wait, what's their mascot?
The cooter?
That's right.
Okay.
For some reason, I was getting it mixed up with the Nittany Lion of Penn State.
I think also a cooter.
Yeah.
They're all the same cat, really.
Yeah, is a Nittany Lion the same?
I don't even know what a Nittany Lion is. If I'm out in the wilderness, I'm not like, oh, fuck, no one moved.
There's a Nittany Lion.
There's a Nittany Lion coming at me.
I believe his name is Cosmo. I one moved. There's a Nittany Lion. There's a Nittany Lion coming at me. I believe his name is Cosmo.
I like that.
It's a good mascot name.
He's got some moves on the football field.
Cosmo the Cougar.
Yeah.
All right.
Hey, I'm glad to be here too, man.
Oh, what's up, Dylan?
What's up, fam?
It's going to be a good week.
Is it podcast week or is it not?
Well, I was going to wait to announce it, but I mean, I know last week was podcast week, but it not well i was gonna wait to announce it but uh i mean i know last week was
podcast week but i will say this i'd like to take this chance to apologize to absolutely nobody
it's podcast week again all right can we guys can we afford this buckle up to do podcast week again
it's like an investment a lot of dollars behind it i've been in the finances like
why do we we just keep spending on pot you. You put a lot of dollars behind it. I've been in the finances. Why do we just keep spending
on podcasts? You're going to see a lot of promoted tweets.
Yeah.
We're going to serve you up some
ads for podcast week.
Podcast week is going to be huge.
Banners on the website. We're not doing as many
episodes as we did last podcast week.
Personally, I'm a little gassed.
Last week was aggressive.
We went off. People are saying. Like on Patreon, I don't think gassed Last week was aggressive We went off, people are saying
Like on Patreon, I don't think we've ever done that many
We did four Patreon episodes last week?
Bachelor, worst of, Bachelor, listener voicemails
Oh my gosh
No one's doing four episodes on Patreon
That's never been done before
I'm a little bummed that there's only one Bachelor episode this week
People are also forgetting
I'm not
People are forgetting we did Club Cool.
So listen to Club Cool if you want to hear your voice.
Barrett's supposed to send.
I'll pull back the curtain.
I'm waiting on that slide, Barrett, if you're listening.
Say he's going to send it over.
Yeah, what the hell?
I was like, we want to promo this.
Yeah, what the fuck?
Yeah, we talked all things skiing.
And we even dabbled in a little stuff at the end.
Dave's new J's.
That was a comprehensive podcast.
Yeah, we were going long.
I honestly wasn't ready to leave. If you haven't listened to Club
Cool for whatever reason,
give it a listen because, first of all,
his normal co-host
Phil Battaglia, our friend Phil,
he's an excellent co-host,
but Barrett steers
or runs a very tight ship.
He knows how to do it.
He just directs a conversation very well.
It makes me self-conscious about talking into a mic.
Yeah, you're pretty bad at that.
You're bad at talking into a mic.
Let me do a little self-scouting here.
The Club Cool skiing podcast episode,
I liked more than our episode in Breckenridge.
All right, man, why don't you get out?
It probably helps that we didn't get drunk the night before
and then record a podcast first thing in the morning.
Potentially, yes.
Weird move, but we had to do it.
We had to do the 8 a.m. on vacation recording.
It turns out when you're on vacation,
podcasting takes a back seat,
and you kind of forget to do it.
We got it done.
My brain was lacking oxygen as well.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I was ready to get out of that altitude.
We're recording at altitude.
Like, that's tough.
It's tough to do, Brett.
Give us a lot of oxygen in the blood.
That being said, go listen to the Club Cool episode.
If you want, like, the comprehensive Brett episode, that's the one.
Yeah.
It was good.
It was fantastic.
Yeah.
Had a little more direction than we did.
Shouts to Barrett.
Yeah.
We have another major announcement.
If you're a patron, you already know this announcement.
We're doing a South by Southwest meetup on March 17th,
also known as St. Patrick's Day.
Oh, what?
Where are your green?
Where are your green, Dylan?
I'll pinch you.
It's at 1130 at Augustine on Rainy Street at the Patreon house.
Yes, this is sponsored by Patreon, folks.
The house of creativity.
If you want us to look good, and we know you do want us to look good, show out.
Come support us.
Drinks are on the house.
Sure are.
I think we can announce that.
Oh, that's big.
So that's cool.
Can't confirm if there's going to be green beer or not.
If there is, I won't be drinking it.
Catch me not drinking green beer.
Support us.
Have fun.
Say hi.
Get a few drinks in you.
Now, it is a Tuesday.
Let's preface that.
But it's St. Paddy's.
It's St. Paddy's, and it's like lunch break time.
People may – look, and if anybody's out there like,
why would you guys do it on a Tuesday?
Well, we didn't really have much time.
We didn't have a choice.
We had a serious day, actually.
If you work in Austin, just mark your calendar now.
You've got a dentist appointment at 1 o'clock that day.
Sure do.
It's in Round Rock, so you've got to drive all the way up there.
So you've got to mark yourself off at like 1130.
Or maybe on that Thursday, you start working up a little cough at work.
And so the next day, you're like, oh, I can't come in.
I'm not feeling great.
Play hooky is what I'm saying.
Yeah.
Black long. Yeah, exactly. Pull come in. I'm not feeling great. Play hooky is what I'm saying. Yeah. Black long.
Yeah, exactly.
Pull one of those.
You have sick days.
Use them.
And I know, what is it, 1130 to 1230?
That's easy for a podcaster to say.
Just fucking burn your sick days, dog.
I don't know what it's going to be like after 1230, but I point on, I'm not going home.
Let me say that.
Oh, my gosh.
People are wondering, like wondering like hey are you guys
going to
You ain't fucking leaving?
We might have to
escort you home.
People are like
am I going to come up
for this like from
San Antonio
if you guys are just
going to bail at 1230
I guarantee that's
not going to happen.
If you've never seen
Dave at a meet up
and most of you haven't
oh it's something.
It's something.
To quote Derek Lewis
after party
little woodrows
actually I don't think it's even open at that point. I'm going to be ruined that week the more I think about it. I'm going to Derek Lewis after party. Little Woodrose.
Actually, I don't think it's even open at that point.
I'm going to be ruined that week the more I think about it.
We're going to have to do some creative.
Oh, you're going to Vegas. Because I'm going Tuesday meetup, Wednesday lick the wounds, recover.
Thursday, straight to Vegas.
Yeah.
Vegas will for the first time ever.
Quite excited.
Hell yeah.
I don't know what I'm doing, but catch me throwing just big boy stacks on every game going on.
I got to chill on the stacks.
You throw bones at the Bellagio, man.
Maybe, maybe.
I'm going to prioritize just the sports betting with March Madness happening over.
Maybe I'll take my winnings and play only with the winnings that I get from the sports betting.
How does that sound?
Sure.
How many big boy stacks do I need to prep for Vegas?
You've got to think at least 10 big boy stacks.
Okay.
I still don't know how big a big boy stack is, but I can make it work.
I'm sitting pretty right now.
I did pretty well on my XFL bets.
Also, this is not me saying this.
This is Patreon saying this.
Plentiful mimosas is what I'm told.
Oh, yeah.
Mimos?
Yeah.
Like, bottomless even, maybe.
You got to think.
I might go topless.
Wow, Brett will take his shirt off at the meetup, folks.
I will.
That's huge.
Topless.
I think you should go bottomless so we can see your legs.
I mean, that's just not going to happen.
He does have legs, though.
We have seen him in the steam room, remember, in Dallas.
That was big.
There's just something up.
Big for the squad.
It was pretty steamy in there, so they didn't get a great look at him.
They also kind of blended in with the white tile.
I think I mentioned that already.
I did let him.
Brett's sitting in the steam room wearing a white towel.
He just kind of blends into everything.
I let him out this weekend, though, on Friday specifically.
No shit?
Yeah.
Really?
It was sunny, yeah.
It was sunny?
And so my legs are currently burnt.
Wait, I hung out with you on Friday.
I was with you Friday.
I did not see your legs.
For that.
Oh.
I went like 11 to 2 out on the patio.
Yeah, no one saw it, though.
That didn't count.
I mean.
All right, man.
I did.
I can prove it.
So anyway, thanks for coming out Tuesday.
March 17th.
March 17th.
Thank you in advance.
March 17th at 1130 Augustine, Rainy Street.
Let me make a promise to the backers.
There will be merch.
And there might even be exclusive merch.
That's a promise you made to the backers.
Don't you dare let them down.
I will not let them down, Dylan.
All right.
And Dave will be there.
Unlike the Denver one.
But he did show.
Yeah.
I made an appearance.
Kissed some babies.
You did.
Shook some hands.
You did.
Beautiful babies.
Will, you wanted to say it.
Just say it.
Beautiful babies.
I'm just going to bring back you doing all the swingers bits when I go to Vegas.
Dude, it's one of the greatest movies of our generation.
Should I get another interview with the Chainsmokers while I'm there?
Yeah, probably.
Don't they have a residency or something?
Probably should.
That's something you need to go to.
You crushed the first one.
I'm going to DM.
I'll DM them and see if they respond.
Can we talk about one of my favorite sponsors of all time
that actually helped me out this weekend?
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Yeah, like I'm copping a sweater and the honey's like, hey, guess what, dumbass?
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Dude, I mashed that honey button.
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You just say tartan suspenders?
Yeah.
Yeah, your boy's going to wear them under his tux for the wedding.
Wow.
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I don't even know what those are, but it sounds tight.
Are they going to be clipped to a button, affixed to a button, or are they the –
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Hey, the Oscars were last night.
You guys aware of this?
Yeah, the Academy Awards.
I went full red carpet last night.
I was sitting on my couch wearing a tux just like chilling.
Were you?
Yeah.
Seems excessive.
On Instagram.
I actually thought for a second.
I was like, should I put on my tuxedo and just have Sally just like take a picture of me from across the apartment just watching the Oscars?
I don't really like the Oscars that much if I'm being honest.
They leave a little bit to be desired, especially after the more fun Golden Globes.
It's a formal environment.
It always starts off a little hot and a little entertaining,
and then it goes into this boring period where you have, like,
usually the musical performances leave a little bit to be desired.
Last night they had Eminem, which I missed the Eminem part.
All I heard is that he was sagging.
It was terrible.
Why was he doing it?
It was not terrible.
It was actually pretty good. Well, I don't like Eminem, so All I heard is that he was sagging. It was terrible. Why was he doing it? It was actually pretty good.
I don't like Eminem, so maybe that's why.
It was bizarre.
Why was he performing
Lose Yourself in 2020?
He won an Oscar for that song.
Or the movie, 8 Mile?
I don't know. I think so.
Best song or whatever.
That sounds like a Grammy. Who knows? No way of looking it up.
But I thought he did okay.
I thought it was...
I mean, it had energy.
Everybody liked it.
Like, the crowd was, like,
all singing it.
You got some great
crowd reactions.
You got people who didn't
know what was going on
just awkwardly
bobbing their heads.
Scorsese.
Scorsese was...
He was lost.
He didn't know
what was going on.
He didn't hit the dab
or anything.
He's also, like, 97.
Did he Vossie bop?
He did Vossie bop, though, yeah.
That's tight.
No, he actually hit the Kwan.
I saw it coming. Eminem did win an Oscar for Best Original Song in 2003 for Lose Yourself.
I can confirm.
Look at me.
Look at the brains on Dave.
Big ass brain over there.
I thought it was okay.
It was fine.
It was good.
It was a fun moment for the Twitter.
Twitter had fun with it.
I like Eminem.
I ride for Eminem.
The one thing I don't understand about Eminem,
and people were really talking about his pants last night.
What's up with his hat?
The tiny brim?
I just don't get his hat selection.
Like borderline Castro hats?
Yeah, it's really weird that he just wears those hats.
The one thing I've never been able to get on board with is just the way he dresses it's very weird it looks like he's about to go execute some guerrilla warfare style
strategies or something yeah yeah it's very it's very peculiar yeah he's the dude like in your
1301 poli sci class it's like in the corner reading like che guevara yeah yeah that's him
dome chomsky some chomsk yeah i don't know it was um i watched the red
carpet i watched the entire thing i didn't really have much choice do you watch e the e channel i
did e and then i switched over i didn't know there were two to abc because i felt like that's where
they had the big boys well he's crest was pulling double duty. So he does both channels?
Yes.
Eminem looks so hard at all times.
He will never crack a smile for anybody.
I think he is pretty hard.
I don't think he's that hard.
I think he's hard.
He's got that beard going now.
No one has a bigger chip on their shoulder than Eminem.
He looks so angry all the time.
Just relax, Eminem.
What's his net worth, Brett? Can you look that up?
I'm going to guess. Money doesn't buy happiness.
I'm going to say $310 million.
Dylan? Whoa. That's a lot.
$95.
Okay, well,
I'm going to say
$400.
As of October 26, 2019,
Eminem's estimated net worth is $210
million. Okay.
You'd think it'd be more. Doing pretty well.
Honestly, I feel like with how many albums
he's sold, he could have used that money to make
some other investments
and amplify that.
He seems like a guy who owns like 30
Little Caesars in the Detroit area.
That'd be tight. A franchisee.
Cannot confirm, but he puts off those vibes.
I could see more Jets.
What's Jets?
It's another.
It's a Detroit-style pizza.
Michigan-based pizza place.
Actually, a great pizza joint.
Really?
It is delish.
Yeah, I got one on Brody down around the corner from me.
Figure it out.
Oh, shit.
I got to do Jets and mods then.
Prioritize Jets.
Okay.
Yeah, you can skip mod for now. Oh, shit. I got to do Jets and Mods then. Prioritize Jets. Okay. Yeah, you can skip Mod for now.
Oh, yeah?
How many films did you guys see that were actually nominated last year?
Not many.
Just Joker.
No, you saw Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.
That one, too.
I saw it with you.
I saw it, too.
Dave, I did something that I'm not proud of.
I saw 1917 without you.
Yeah, I noticed that in your tweet.
I was somewhat
hung over on saturday and i was laying in bed and i thought to myself what do i what do i want to do
today and i saw in 45 minutes there was a airing of 1917 down the street and i was like you know
what i'm just gonna go watch it did you take a xanax first no i had i had a milk stout a left-handed
milk stout okay um was that sick or what the movie was it tight yes i i mean
i didn't see parasite but i could see how 1917 in any other year could have easily won best picture
no problem i'm excited to see parasite so i can actually weigh in and say like okay
parasite gets it i feel like 1917 like sneaky got snubbed last
night with paris i just cleaned up well they got the uh editing i guess the one guy yeah but that's
about it the weird thing with uh it is that there's so much action happening that it doesn't
really allow for like it didn't allow for like really great acting performances even though
everyone in there crushed it but they they didn't get enough screen time
to warrant a full-on nomination,
if that makes sense.
Even the big people in the movie
who you'd recognize,
they have such small parts
because it's just one event after another,
and you don't have recurring characters
besides the two main characters.
Is that something that you should see in a theater?
Yes.
I want to see it.
That is why I went to it.
I'm going this week. Yes. Go see it in a theater. It's worth see in a theater? Yes. I want to see it. That is why I went to it. I'm going this week.
Yes.
Go see it in a theater.
It's worth seeing in a theater.
Okay.
Highly recommend.
What did you think about year two with no host?
I wasn't bummed to see Chris Rock in the beginning.
Dude, him and Steve Martin crushed.
They were great.
I saw some people hating on him.
I thought they were pretty funny.
What? I thought they nailed it. Yeah. Maybe I'm just old. I saw some people hating on him. I thought they were pretty funny. What?
I thought they nailed it.
Yeah.
Maybe I'm just
old.
It's hard to hate
on those two.
I kind of like
the no host move
if I'm being honest.
Well, didn't they
have a host
and somebody got canceled?
Kevin Hart.
It was Kevin Hart.
Wasn't that last year though?
They joked.
Yeah, it was last year.
Oh, okay.
That's why there was
no host last year.
Because of the whole
infidelity situation.
Is that correct?
No, it's because
he had a homophobic tweet.
Homophobic tweet.
Oh, that's right, that's right.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, it didn't bother me.
Honestly, the less host for me, the better at this point in award shows.
Yeah, because I feel like it gives more time for some of the presenters to do bits, which you got.
You got Will Ferrell and Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
They were a power duo.
She's looking great.
She's looking great.
Glad she's back healthy.
Maya Rudolph, Kristen Wiig, they went off.
I thought they were great too.
I did too.
That one didn't land for me.
I thought they, but like the amount of effort
that they had to put in and like learn stuff,
like I was just very impressed with them.
I liked it.
They're clearly just best friends who just hang out.
It dragged on, but it was funny.
Yeah.
I love Kristen Wiig, though.
I love Kristen Wiig.
She's the best.
Yeah, I have a sneaky crush on Kristen.
She's sneaky, like really attractive.
I can't really explain why I have a crush on her.
I think I just did it.
She's sneaky, really attractive.
Her personality puts her over the top.
Oh, yeah.
Brad Pitt looked like a goddamn snack.
Oh, he is.
That's weird.
Also endorsed the show, Letter Kenny.
In an interview.
Can I do one edit for Brad Pitt?
Sure.
I think he needs to trim the hair a little bit.
Well, I'm sure he's going to listen.
Yeah.
You think he looks good with the buzz cut.
I like the longer hair, but it's just getting a little too long in the back where it's like flipping out.
Speaking of needs a hair trim, Al Pacino did not look awesome.
Al Pacino hasn't looked good for a while.
He didn't know he was getting old, so I'll cut him some slack there.
He looked sickly almost.
It was bad.
You know who looked, might have been the hottest on the red carpet?
Scar Jo.
Scar Jo looked good.
She's an attractive young lady.
If you caught a glimpse of scar
joe yesterday she was murdering it who is the young lady from joker the i'm putting this in
quotes love interest the neighbor from joker oh yeah she was she looks great she was on fire she's
awesome first name's like zazie or something like that. Yeah, she's the main female lead in Atlanta.
She's very good in that.
She is.
I thought my snack of the night award went to none other than Brie Larson.
Oh, my God.
Zazie Beetz is her name, which is a tight name.
It sounds like a –
Beetz is E-E-T-Z.
Is she married to Swiss Beetz? It sounds like a DJ's name. Yeah, it sounds like at the start of a song. It sounds like a... B-E-E-T-Z. Is she married to Swiss Beats?
It sounds like a DJ's name.
Yeah, it sounds like at the start of a song.
It's not.
Natalisha Keys?
Yeah, I think so.
I could be saying that completely wrong, by the way, Zazie, but...
Spell it.
Is that Swiss Beats' sister?
Z-A-Z-I-E.
Zazie, Zazie.
Who knows?
Zazie A?
All we know is...
It's literally hard to say.
Yeah.
All we know is she is hot.
She's very attractive
Yeah
Brie Larson's just having a moment lately
Yeah
She's doing it
Dude
You know what though?
Sigourney had me
Sigourney
On the TL last night
I have always been a big
Sigourney Weaver guy
Really?
Weird
Oh man she looked great
That's weird
She was like my first like
Maybe crush From Ghostbusters When I was a kid guy really weird oh man she looked great that's weird she was like my first like um maybe crush
from ghostbusters when i was a kid i was she was the love interest you know she sleeps above her
covers four feet above her covers was she in twister no come on man that's jody jody foster
on helen hunt oh for two okay dude you're killing it. Sigourney and Laura Dern, I get mixed up.
I missed.
I'm bummed.
I missed Laura Dern's speech.
She crushed.
Laura Dern's on fire, too.
I don't watch them.
That was the one where I was on Twitter, and I saw that she won, and I was like, I got
to turn this back on.
I watched a little Love Island in the middle.
I didn't want to watch the really boring stuff.
You just bailed on the Oscars for Love Island?
Dude, I'm too obsessed with it right now.
To everyone who's telling me to watch UK instead,
I have watched UK.
It's too trashy.
The Australian version is less trashy,
but still very much entertaining.
It's a tasteful amount of trash?
Yeah, exactly.
Like, it's trashy, but not as trashy as the UK version,
so I kind of like it.
I feel better about myself watching that. Yeah, I was bum, it's trashy, but not as trashy as the UK version, so I kind of like it. I feel better about myself watching that.
Yeah, I was bummed to miss her.
I don't even know what she won for.
Supporting?
For Marriage Story?
Best Supporting Actress for Marriage Story.
Did not see Marriage Story, did you?
I started it on a plane,
and then I got distracted drinking on said plane.
Ha.
And so I had to stop.
It was when Sally was making her cheese board.
Oh, you were watching it on the Denver flight.
Yeah, I was going to start watching it.
And then I was like, do I really want to start my vacation off
with like an argument?
That's fair.
Yeah, it's like, I'm going to skip this.
The only other thing was like, I thought Joaquin Phoenix
should have won for Joker.
But his speech, man.
You know, I was with him for much of it.
When we got to the artificial insemination part of the speech,
I kind of was scratching my head a little bit.
I see what he's saying.
I see where he's coming from.
With the milk thing?
The milk thing, yeah.
I mean, I understand.
I don't necessarily agree.
I support our dairy workers.
Shout out to all them.
He's an interesting fella.
Say that.
I think as far as wild-ass Joaquin Phoenix speeches go,
that one was pretty tame.
From what they,
from what a lot of people probably thought they were going to get like that one, they're probably
like breathing a sigh of relief because that could have gone off the rails. Yeah. It kind of did go
off the rails in a way, but not as bad as it could have gone. You know what? Compared to Texas's own
Renee Zellweger speech, he crushed it because her speech was just the worst renee it was the
most scatterbrained thing i've ever seen how many people besides everyone put the wrap it up box on
twitter she was uh she was a pino or two and a xanax deep and just decided to thank every person
in her life i am glad that they didn't play people off last night. They tried to do that
to the parasite. Who did they run it back for on the parasite thing? Because after they did that,
I was like, I'm not sold. We should be running this back for her. You got to give more time.
Here's the deal. For all the parasite wins, they need double time because he needs a translator.
And I'm fine giving him that. But they kind of, Jane Fonda was put in a pretty awkward spot when they panned over to her and she's like, ah, not done.
Yep.
Still going.
Still going.
And they turn the lights back on him.
But, yeah, some dude got totally cucked, one of the actors in it, because he walked up and then they turn it off like, all right, you got one.
Yep.
Sorry, bro.
Tom Hanks was like leading the charge to turn the lights back on on and he was all of us yeah where was chet i didn't see chet there
chet hanks i don't think chet i don't think chet's allowed to go on red carpets anymore
the hanks family has put a he's more of a red they put a hard stop on it exactly he traded he
traded in the red carpet for red stripe that's that's good brett dylan your boy walked away
with some hardware last night.
Brett's proud of himself.
Which boy is that?
Elton John.
Ah, EJ, my dog.
Dude, he had to win.
My dog.
It's probably the last time he'll ever be up for an Oscar,
and the Oscars would love to have Elton John as a winner.
Yeah, yeah.
I told Sally, I was like, dude, I don't care what song was the best.
Put Elton John on stage so I can just see him.
Best song is the award he got, right?
Yep.
Best original song.
Yeah.
It was great, man.
Does that make him an EGOT now?
No.
He's in the running.
He has never won an Emmy.
Oh.
Okay.
Sal and I went deep into EGOT research last night to see who is up for, or who's next up.
Got it.
Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, Tony.
Tony.
Oh.
Tones. Hey. There, Oscar, Tony. Tony. Oh! Tones.
Hey!
There he is.
John, you could be a Tony in a separate life.
He's just the best.
EJ, that is.
I could be a Tony?
Yeah, there are a couple life decisions that could have taken you to Tony territory.
You think so?
Yeah.
Like the name?
Yeah, what are we talking about here?
Your name's Anthony and you go by Tony.
If you were Italian, you'd be okay okay do tony's give off certain vibes that i i admit i think you
yeah you match the tony vibe all right i'll take it whatever ej though man god what a talent
what an absolute year for him yeah was that movie not nominated otherwise rocket man
no it got he got very much snubbed because he won the golden globe for best actor and he didn't even
get nominated interesting oh yeah and uh if you want to compare that to i don't know similar genre
if you want to look at what remy mallick did in the bohemian rhapsody movie, big snub because he was not that great in it.
Whoa.
I thought he crushed it.
Remy?
Yeah.
I did not.
He was the only part of that movie that I actually kind of,
when he was, if he wasn't on the screen,
I was like, all right, fast forward.
You mean the over-the-top love interest
didn't do it for you in that movie?
The movie just had a lot of unnecessary details
that I just didn't care about.
Hey, that chick who played Harriet Tubman who performed last night, love interest didn't do it for you in that movie? The movie just had a lot of unnecessary details that I just didn't care about.
Hey, that chick who played Harriet Tubman who performed last night?
She's also an outsider.
Also an outsider.
The pipe's on her.
Who knew?
I did not know.
I was...
I looked at Alyssa.
Is that the same?
She's freaking talented.
She's the weird one in Outsider?
Yeah.
She's like the brainy one who's got like the special gifts.
Yeah, the brain on her.
What's up with that?
The brain on that girl.
No spoilers.
I've not watched the latest episode.
Me neither.
Neither have I, David.
Me neither.
Okay.
All right.
Well, just don't spoil it.
I want to talk about The Outsider on this podcast, but my brain is too like crippled
by it to like actually talk about.
Like I don't even know what's happening.
Pretty awesome.
Yeah. I've been enjoying it thoroughly. Are there't even know what's happening. Pretty awesome. Yeah.
I've been enjoying it thoroughly.
Are there spoilers out there because it was a Stephen King thing?
Probably.
Was it a Stephen King book?
Yeah.
Did he write this screenplay?
It's a recent.
It's a fairly recent, like last 20 years, Stephen King book.
Okay.
What do we think of Billie?
Eilish?
Mm-hmm.
Her yesterday rendition was fantastic.
Yeah, she was pretty good.
I was never out on her, but all of a sudden I'm way in on her.
She made for some great crowd reactions.
You knew when they panned to her.
It's like, this will be meme.
Possibly GIF.
Yes.
That was probably the main meme of the night, I'd say.
That was during the Kristen Wiig thing, right?
Yeah.
I always forget the other girl's name.
Were there any Weinstein comments last night?
I think those have been – it's a dead horse now.
I don't think – I feel like with the trial going on, though,
it's like it's kind of coming back into the news cycle.
Fair.
Yeah.
I mean –
We need to see Parasite.
Yeah.
I'm probably going to – honestly, I'm probably going to watch it tonight
after not Bachelor, but I'm probably going to watch it this week. I wikied it just to see what happens. I don't want to know. Yeah, I'm probably going to watch it tonight. After, not Bachelor, but I'm probably going to watch it this week.
I wikied it just to see what
happens. I don't want to know.
I haven't seen a trailer for it. I have not.
The only thing I know is that it's about
poor people.
That's all I got. So I'm going to try
to go in with a very
blind eye to everything
that I could possibly look up beforehand.
Shouts to Bong, though.
Bong cleaned up.
Bong had himself a night.
He was the big winner.
I like that he just wanted to get drunk.
You can't drink at those things, at the Oscars.
Like during the ceremony?
I mean, it's not like the Golden Globes where they have waiters and shit.
They don't have tables with champagne on them.
There's not like cup holders on the back of the seats?
That'd be great. They have like Alamo Drafthouse waiters and shit. They don't have tables with champagne on them. There's not cup holders on the back of the seats. That'd be great.
They have Alamo Drafthouse
waiters going around. So that just leads
me to believe that they're all just popping
pills. Trying to ride that
buzz out. Yeah, the edibles
are just in full effect at the
Oscars.
That does suck. I just realized that.
They go into
it with a nice buzz, but as the night wears on, you just get cranky and go
through with trolls and shit.
You've got to think they've got a bar.
When you exit and you go out to the lobby, they've got to have a bar.
They gave you a little bit.
You're just slugging champagne.
The presenters and the winners and stuff, they've got that special bar.
They showed a couple clips from it last night.
I had a dream once that I won an Oscar and it was like a very lucid dream
and like I haven't
been able to shake it.
Part of me is like
is it a sign?
Am I going to win
an Oscar one day?
I don't think you are.
Dude, people are
wondering though.
If you were going to
win any of them
which one would you
be most likely?
Me?
Do they do
podcast Grammys?
Well, y'all did that
movie that one time.
Did the TFM movie
get out?
Did that get any Oscars?
It got snubbed, man.
Tom Green didn't get any nods?
No, it got snubbed.
It was unbelievable.
That's too bad.
Yeah.
I thought that was your chance, Will.
Sorry.
I got nominated for an Emmy for the best meatloaf appearance at 24 Diner in Austin on the Food Network.
I got snubbed for my appearance.
Pork belly?
Yeah.
No, I had the chili.
Best pork, what was it?
Pork belly chili?
What was that?
Was it just chili?
It was just chili.
Some brisket in it.
I was a little, I do love that we had that appearance
because I always forget that we did that until I get randomly,
it like airs randomly and all of a sudden I have people texting me about it.
It happened so long ago that people, when they see it for the first time,
are like, why are y'all not making a bigger deal of this?
And it's like, I don't know, it's just I forgot it happened.
Yeah, me too.
Yeah, it was kind of random.
Just another day, you know?
Just stuffing my stupid face with meatloaf.
It's great meatloaf.
It's a great meatloaf.
I'll never forget how they wronged that one dude I was eating with.
They showed the clip of him right before me,
and he has egg yolk dripping down his fucking lip.
It's just revolting.
I'm surprised that wasn't me.
I thought that guy was with you.
He was.
Oh.
I don't remember his name.
He worked at one of the ad agencies here.
Nice guy.
That must have been real tight.
Yeah.
Should we talk XFL?
Sorry.
Are we done? Are we putting a wrap on the Grams? I don't know. Do we talk XFL? Are we done?
Are we putting a wrap on the Grams?
I don't know.
Do we have any closing thoughts?
No.
Nothing.
Just a volume shooting that on Twitter.
Always is.
Oh, hell yeah.
It's poppin' shot.
Nobody lands, and they're boring.
What about Country Renee joining us?
Why did she go full Texas accent? I didn't even notice the Texas accent. Oh, she was playing us what why did she go full texas accent i didn't even notice
the texas accent oh she was playing it full yeah it came it went in and out this sounds really
stupid i thought she was british for like probably 10 years because of she won an oscar for uh she
could yeah bridget jones diary and i just thought she was British. I mean, this is before I lived in Texas.
I didn't know that.
Do people in Texas even ride for her?
They lit the tower last night at the university.
Yeah.
Did they do it the first time around that she won?
Probably not.
Well, I don't know.
What'd she win for, Jerry Maguire?
No.
Bridget Jones Diary.
Really?
Should have won for Jerry.
That's a great movie, by the way.
Never seen it. How have you never seen Jerry Maguire? I don't know. I don't know. That's a great movie, by the way. Never seen it.
How have you never seen Jeremy Blunt?
I don't know.
It is a fantastic movie.
I think it's because it was rated R when it first came out.
My parents were like, nah.
There's some pretty hardcore sex scenes.
Really?
No, not at all.
No, it's good, man.
Really good.
I was a big Cuba guy back in the day.
He's gotten a little.
It's not great.
Yeah.
He crushes in that movie, though.'ll say this rod tidwell renee puts off goop vibes yeah dude she's up to something
i would love to see her like everyday routine so we saw her new year's eve in a bar the um
stephen f austin bar in aust, as you might have guessed.
She is one of the tiniest people I've ever seen.
Makes sense.
She's listed at like 5'4 on Wikipedia.
She's now 5'4.
Wow.
She's probably 5'1, 5'2.
What's her trap routine like?
Her arms look great.
She's in phenomenal shape.
She's doing like the shoulder raise, the bent over,
really hitting those rear delts.
Yeah, yeah. Look good, though. No, really hitting those rear delts. Yeah. Yeah.
Looked good, though.
No, yeah, she's in very good shape.
For her age, especially?
How old is she?
You got to think upper 40s?
Yeah.
Maybe even 50?
Hard to say.
Can't even look it up, man.
How horny were you last night?
I wasn't horny at all, man.
Okay.
I didn't look up her age.
Yeah, you weren't horny at all, man. Okay. I didn't look up for age. Yeah, you weren't horny at all?
Nah, man.
If any moment in that broadcast were to make you age, which one would it have been?
Renee Zellweger.
Is that your answer?
Really?
It is 50.
50.
On the dot?
50 on the dot.
Oh, so Renee wasn't your horny moment of the night?
I didn't have a horny moment.
No.
My horny moment of the night was when Brie Larson came on stage,
and I was like, God, she's just running back.
How hot she looked on Kimmel that one time.
What is the other lady, brunette lady?
Gal Gadot.
Wonder Woman.
Gal Gadot?
It's Gadot.
Is it really?
Are you sure?
Yes, I'm positive.
That's a terrible pronunciation of that.
She needs to really go back to the drawing board.
Yeah, it was Gadot until she went on Kimmel or one of those and was like, yeah, it's actually Gadot.
Where's she from?
Israel.
Natalie Portman.
Also Latat.
She did.
She had embroidered into her Dior cape female directors who weren't nominated.
And a fun tweet from Ted in Pittsburgh.
And I'm just going to gas him up here.
And they say the Hollywood elite are out of touch.
Who among us doesn't have a Dior cape embroidered with the names of other rich people who weren't nominated for a gold award?
Funny.
I mean, it's a good point.
It is.
It detracts from the actual reason that she did that it does
i don't hate the reason that she's he's a noted left-wing twitter follow true true so he can say
that i i didn't know i needed a dr cape until she started wearing one i have a supreme cape yeah
yeah it's like twelve thousand. That seems way too much.
Never got a chance to wear it.
I know.
I was going to wear it skiing, but.
I have a few capes, and I just never know when to pull a trigger on them out on the town, you know?
It's tough to pull off a cape.
It is.
Are we ready to talk XFL yet or what?
Yeah.
I watched a little bit this weekend.
I don't know.
Tough night for my Renegades.
Are you riding hard for the Renegades?
Yeah.
Extreme Eminem voice.
Renegades.
That was good.
Yeah, I am riding hard for them. Okay, can someone explain to me?
I watched like two seconds of the XFL just because I was on my soccer bullshit for a little bit.
I'm sorry.
What are the main changes to the XFL from the NFL?
More insight.
The kickoff rule seems to be the biggest on-field rule change.
What is the kickoff rule for those at home and me sitting right here?
The receiving team and the kicking team, they line up like 10 yards apart from each other.
About the, I don't know, 30 on the receiving side of the field.
So the kicker's kind of like out in the middle of nowhere by himself.
No one can move until the receiving team catches the ball.
Okay.
That's when they can all make their move and start blocking and tackling and shit.
So the problem with the NFL is they've gotten so player safety conscious.
So no running start.
That they've pretty much eliminated or made it a moot point, the kickoff return.
The reason they're not eliminating that in the NFL is purely commercials, right?
It's an excuse for them to cut to commercial twice instead of not doing it at all.
A real pain in the ass.
It's the worst.
It really is.
Either let guys get severely hurt or get rid of it.
Let's go.
No, this is something that I think they need to look at adopting
because I like it.
It's a safety thing because you don't get a running start.
You still get the excitement of a potential run back, though.
Sure.
Yeah.
I love run backs.
We all do, Dave.
Also, so you get the – when they do a review,
when there's like a challenge, they're reviewing a call, you get to hear like what the officials are hearing.
They're talking and stuff.
That's cool.
You get to hear like some plays being called, right?
Yeah, you get the play calling in the – like all the mics are hot.
Everybody's mic'd up, right?
Or most of the players?
Yes.
That's what they need.
But here's the problem.
I love that.
Here's the problem with all these leagues.
The product on the field is always dog shit.
Because they are all backup, backup, backups,
especially the quarterbacks,
and the football is terrible.
I don't care how you dress it,
with all the fucking bells and whistles,
the football still sucks.
Who's the biggest name in the XFL right now?
Like, Donnell Pumphrey, the running back for the D.C. Defenders.
Didn't they used to call you Pumphrey back in the day?
Yeah, they did.
Who's the Michigan State dude, Connor Cook?
Is he still slinging the rock somewhere?
I think he's a backup.
That was kind of where the Renegades got in trouble.
Their starter was down, Landry Jones, former Sooner great, Dylan.
Remind me, he wasn't great at OU, was he?
He was decent.
He didn't light it up or anything.
Was he a system quarterback there?
Yeah, he was a system quarterback at OU.
I have a mini-steam about the XFL announcers.
Really?
Turn it on.
Oh, here we go.
Oh, it's definitely on. When white announcers. Really? Turn it on. Is it on? Oh, here we go. Oh, it's definitely on.
When white announcers, oh.
Whoa.
When they say, when they pronounce the Q in a name that has Q-U in it,
like the punter for I don't know who, Marquette King,
who punted the NFL for a long time.
Pat McAfee was one of them, actually.
And then the other guy, I don't even know who he was with.
They were saying Marquette King.
A lot of them say Marquise, and it's always bothered me.
It's not Marquette.
Wait, are you sure that's not how they pronounce it?
Yes.
His name is Marquette.
Marquette King.
Marquette King.
And he takes the absolute shit out of the ball.
How did he not?
Eh, whatever.
I mean, he had a long run in the NFL.
Yeah.
And he booned one like 60 yards, 60 plus yards last night.
Leg on that guy.
And they were like, Marquette King.
Dude, it's all legs.
Dude, his name's Marquette.
What are you doing?
With punters in the NFL, it's weird.
Once you're in there long enough and you're good enough,
your salary is so much, you almost have to—
He outplayed his salary.
Yeah.
Literally.
Yeah.
It happens.
Interesting.
With punters, they're like,
I'm not going to pay a guy $4.5 million
when I can pay a rookie to do pretty much the same thing, 700K.
But the XFL, it's just not good football.
And I think people love all the bells and whistles to it, but the football sucks.
I didn't think it was that bad.
It was terrible.
It was 6-3 every first half because they would score and then miss an extra point.
I don't know.
I'm a guy, though, who watching the NFL the last couple years,
I've said to myself, I don't think this is a great product.
Now, obviously, there are outliers like the Chiefs, fun to watch, the Ravens.
But, like, a lot of it's not that consumer-friendly.
But I think I'm going to give it a chance.
I think it's going to make it an entire season.
I don't think it's going to fail like the previous league did,
whatever that was, AFL.
AAF?
AAF.
Did that completely fail?
Like three weeks in.
Yeah, like it just folded.
They were trying to be the NFL 2.0.
Like everything was the same.
Yeah, that's lame.
And obviously that's not going to work.
Yeah, no one cares.
But if you're the XFL, who are you propping up as your studs like
cardell jones well they got a he was he was like 19 of 40 or something i mean it just it pissed me
off the biggest names the coaches yeah i mean like bob stoops is probably the biggest name
i didn't realize cardell wasn't okay he's a defender. Yeah. He's the starting quarterback for the D.C. defenders
who played a hell of a game against the C.
I watched that full game, giving it all I had,
and I watched the next one, too, and it was just –
I gave it a weekend.
I tried.
I really did try, and I –
I don't know.
Maybe I just need a team to ride for.
That's my issue.
Is it like I said I was going to be a Seattle guy?
I turned the game on for a little bit, and I made it about three drives before.
I was like, all right, there's got to be something else on right now.
I'd probably fucking watch Love Island because it's trash.
I just can't get behind a league that's, like, tier two professional of anything.
That's why the MLS, and I'm not a soccer guy in general, but the MLS does absolutely nothing for me.
Yeah, totally agree.
Because it's not the best professional soccer there is.
No, that's why, as a noted soccer watcher, I don't watch very much MLS.
It's getting better, but it's just not there for me,
and I just don't care enough.
When Austin FC is going to be there, I will be much more in because I have a team to ride for,
and I'll probably watch every Austin FC game.
But right now, I can't just watch these random cities
that I don't give a fuck about.
If I get sucked into being a fan of that team,
I swear I'm never going to forgive myself.
I'm going to buy you a fucking moisture-wicking polo.
You're going to go to the games with me.
I'm going to buy you beers and stuff.
It's going to be great.
I thought you put a box on the company card.
We should.
It probably doesn't even cost that much. We'll get a box one day. That's going to be great. I thought you put a box on the company card. No. We should. Probably doesn't even cost that much.
We'll get a box one day.
That's what we'll do.
We'll get a box for a really shitty game in the heat, and we'll just watch that.
I bet it's not that much money.
Like an air-conditioned one, you're saying?
Yeah.
Okay.
You know who was at the Renegades game yesterday?
T-Man.
Yeah.
I saw a noted T-Man was there.
T-Man was there doing it. Apparently they got like
17,000 people out there for that at the ballpark. Still weird seeing
my childhood ballpark now housing minor league
football. You know when I was out in the first game
D.C. versus Seattle, they pumped in
crowd noise and they pumped in an MVP chant
for Cardale Jones like drive number one.
And it was such trash
to do a perfectly executed MVP chant
over the loudspeaker
that they made sound like crowd noise.
Seems like game one is a weird time
to do the MVP chant.
Cardale Jones.
Yes.
It was awful.
I mean, it was WWE football.
And if you like that, then maybe it's for you.
But I was not into it.
And the sideline reporters who are, like,
over-aggressive with interviewing people every drive.
I like that.
I hated that.
The NFL is so, like, the only sound bites you get are, like, trash.
It's, like, the most generic don't say anything that's going to ruffle feathers.
There's, like, five guys who give good interviews.
I didn't mind it.
I like it.
Sam Darnold can't even say that he's seeing ghosts out there with, like, everyone throwing their hands up.
Like, don't fucking say it on the sidelines.
You don't want people to hear it, you loser.
Okay, wow.
Jesus.
Guy has mono, dude.
I thought it was so soft that people were like, oh, man, how dare they play that on TV?
Yeah, that was soft.
Like, shut up.
Yeah, that was really interesting.
He should be ashamed of how he's playing.
Don't try to humanize him.
He did beat the Cowboys.
Yeah.
I don't like to talk about that, though, David.
Just saying.
Hey, Sam Darnold also beat the Lions last season.
Tough times.
Oh, well.
I don't know.
I can't tell if I'm in or out.
I'm probably out.
I'm out.
Yeah, big time out.
I didn't put any big boy stacks down either.
Oh, I did.
Did any of those games hit the over?
One ended up hitting.
Because I remember watching one of them being like,
the over-under is way too high for this game.
At least one of them on set.
I didn't even look at the Sunday totals or anything.
But it's weird when extra points aren't a thing.
How is Vegas setting lines for a league that didn't exist a few months ago?
It's got to be that they're like, I mean, that's got to be one of the tougher things you do.
But I guess we're all clueless when it comes to betting on them.
So they just take a shot in the dark.
I don't know.
Maybe I'll put down some big boy stacks in Vegas.
You will, bitch.
Ooh.
Just catch me in the sports book watching XFL
while everyone else is watching March Madness.
Yikes.
Hey, can you turn on the Renegades game, please?
Dave, do you want to talk combat sports a minute?
Yeah, hit my music.
Yeah, that's it.
Did you guys watch the fights?
Negative.
I watched the social media coverage.
It didn't have the Connor effect on me, so I didn't feel like pulling trig,
and I think I was asleep before the fights even happened.
Is there some controversy, Dave?
There's a lot of controversy.
The entire card was okay.
It was in Houston.
I thought about going, and then I looked at prices for decent seats,
and it just didn't really make sense financially,
which I normally don't discuss publicly.
All in all, though, I'm glad I bought it.
John Jones, well regarded as the goat, greatest of all time.
Yes.
Also a known cheater.
Does like a lot of drugs, too.
Well, the steroids thing is not cut and dry.
It was trace amount.
I can't even explain the science, but a lot of people think that it was bullshit and it was a tainted supplement.
I want my UFC fighters to trace amounts of steroids
in their body.
Sure, microdose.
I don't care.
Don't care.
Yeah, he won a controversial decision over Dominic Reyes.
Dom.
And watching the fight,
I thought it could have gone either way.
Jon Jones obviously won the last two rounds.
Reyes won the first two.
It's a five-round fight.
The third round is controversial.
Could have gone either way.
You can't fade against the champ, though, and that's what did him in.
It wasn't a great fight.
Obviously, there weren't any major blows dealt, but it was good
if you're into the technical aspect of MMA.
Derek Lewis, the guy you guys know, Derek Lewis, the Black Beast, Houston's own. He aspect of MMA. Derek Lewis, the guy, do you guys know Derek Lewis, the Black Beast,
Houston's own?
Heard of him.
You heard of him?
I don't know.
He had the great quote with Rogan a couple of years ago,
my balls was hot.
That was great.
I forgot about that.
He went viral, viral sensation.
He won, and he won on a decision, and he probably lost that fight,
but that's okay.
He was the dude who afterwards said after party at Little Woodrow's.
Little Woodrow's got so much free ad.
That was insane.
Two different fighters.
See you at Little Woodrow's.
What's going on there?
Really?
Is it two Houston guys?
Maybe.
Derek Lewis is a Houston guy.
They paid him for that then right i guess
you gotta think can i ask a question regarding john jones yeah
could the four could the four of us in this room beat him up no no he would take us all down pretty
easily how many people would we have to add to our squad right now for him to get taken down by us
two more of size we throw klein in and then uh micah
mike yeah what if dylan takes his back i can't here's the problem with john jones he's not like
um what did dylan the most jack dude he's long well what if dylan jumps on his back and latches
on and tries to like maybe keep his arms down a little bit. He's not going to be able to do that. He knows how to escape that.
I feel like my body blows aren't going to do much damage.
Yeah.
I have a photo of him queued up right now, and he's a unit,
and his arms are – I mean, he has the wingspan of a fucking eagle.
He has weirdly tiny legs, though, like super skinny legs.
He comes from a family of NFL athletes.
You know his brother's Chandler Jones of the Cardinals?
Yeah.
One of the best defensive players in the league.
I'm safe in saying that.
An athletic family.
Like, that's a freakishly athletic family.
So, yeah, he would beat the piss out of us.
He would take us out back and spank us.
Give me one Micah light sweep to John Jones, though, and we're in good shape.
Get those tree trunks moving.
His legs are just so weirdly skinny.
If we added Micah, do you think we could have a better chance?
Yeah, we would have a better chance.
I think six of us could take him down.
Okay.
Somebody's going to have to take the initial damage, like running at him.
They're going to take a kick to the head.
I don't want to be
the sacrificial lamb, but I think I would have to.
He has skinny legs.
He's crazy.
Chicken legs.
Chicken legs are in, as we all know.
He might prove your theory, Dylan.
My theory doesn't need to be proven.
What's your theory?
If it's a theory, it does need to be proven. What's your theory? Well, if it's a theory, it does need to be proven.
That's true.
Just that there's not much you can do to change the size of your legs.
Either a thick-legged boy or a skinny-legged boy, and you can't do much about it.
Okay.
You can tone them up a little bit, sure, but you can't add mass to skinny legs.
You know, I feel like women can add mass to their legs much easier than guys can.
I feel like women can add mass to their legs much easier than guys can.
You can tone up your legs as a female easier than guys can.
Guys, you have a 10% movement where I feel like girls can get strong in their legs.
10%. That's fair.
I like that.
Yeah.
10% fluctuation.
Yeah.
You're not doing much else.
Yeah.
I don't know if there's any science that proves that,
but I'm going to blindly agree with you.
It's just from what I've heard, you know, talking to the ladies.
Yeah, I talk to chicks, not to brag.
Oh, good for you.
Last thing, I think I'm running out.
I've almost been doing this for a minute.
I want to give props to Rogan because Rogan was just on fire,
calling out the judges for bad decisions, bad scorecards.
Like in the middle of one of the fights, he called out a judge.
He looked at Dominic Cruz, who also does color commentary on there.
They're like, dude, this guy's not even watching the fight.
This judge is just looking down at the ground talking to somebody.
He's not even watching the fight.
Good.
What the fuck?
It was amazing.
How can you do that?
I think Joe's at the point. Joe makes like $30 million a year on his podcast alone you're doing okay he's doing fine
i don't think i think he knows that they he's not going to be with the ufc forever and now that
they're with espn i think he you know he's already gone after steven a smith i think he knows he's on
a short lease leash i think it would only benefit him if he got fired, and he wouldn't care one bit.
But, dude, I don't think, would they fire him?
Because for me, he's a major draw.
He's the top three.
He's the reason I got into MMA.
Yeah, he's the reason I know anything about MMA
because of listening to Joe Rogan.
And also, when I tune into the pay-per-views,
I'm tuning in partially just to see Joe Rogan interacting and talking to people.
Yeah.
He's fucking really good at what he does.
He's really good.
He breaks it down.
Some people think he gets a little excited, but he, like the jujitsu stuff and the wrestling,
like, I don't know what I'm looking at.
He breaks it down in a way where I'm like, okay, I see what they're doing there.
When is the next marquee fight?
Like UFC, is there one in March?
That's pretty good.
There's one next week, Stylebender versus the Cuban dude whose name escapes me.
I almost want to get –
Cuban zombie?
This dude is jacked and he's like 50 years old.
I almost want to get invested in like one cycle to see if it's for me.
I'm surprised I didn't – after the counter fight last time,
I'm surprised I didn't get more excited for this one.
In no time – did you buy it?
No.
No, no, no.
Maybe if I hadn't been so dead on Saturday, I maybe would have.
Why were you dead on Saturday?
I almost sent out a text to say if y'all want to come over,
but I kind of felt like everybody was laying low.
I know Dylan was at the ranch.
Yeah, we had a pretty chill weekend.
I went a little hard with Micah, as you may have seen on Twitter at Will DeFreeze.
He busted out a bottle of Malort.
Ah, yes.
I did see that.
Because Micah, after I went to dinner and I was already a little tuned up, we got a
text from Micah and Boo Boo asking us if we want to have some drinks back at the apartment.
Ah, yeah.
We went down and I mixed up some martinis.
I had a couple beers.
And then all of a sudden we started talking about Malort and how bad it tastes.
Paninis, I had a couple beers, and then all of a sudden we started talking about Malort and how bad it tastes.
And Micah's future relatives, once he marries Boo Boo, they were there,
and they were like, I've never had it before.
Like, what does it taste like?
And I was like, I don't know, like, it kind of tastes like a sneaker.
It's one of the worst beverages.
And so we were like, all right, let's do a shot of it.
And so Micah poured them up, and then the second I did it, I was like,
yeah, I shouldn't have done that.
Yeah.
I didn't feel great the next day.
Yeah, so you got Stylebender Yoel Romero is the name I was looking for.
Look him up real quick, Dylan.
You want to talk about a dude who's jacked?
Spell it for me.
What does legs do?
Y-O-E-L-R-O-M-E-R-O.
And he's 50?
He's 42.
Okay.
But he's also like he came from Cuba, so it's like one of those like,
are you 42 or 45, maybe older?
Yeah, this guy's in pretty good shape.
Daniel Monte?
Oh, yeah.
Looks like he lifts.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, he's like first team all body.
That dude is jacked.
I mean, can I get a closer look at this?
Dude's a snack.
Snacky.
Damn.
I was not expecting him to be that big.
Yeah.
I think I just need a squat.
I can't be paying full price alone in my apartment every night,
so I think we just got to start squatting up for these fights.
Because I can easily get into it.
We should squat up, go live at some point for the actual Combat Sports Minute in real time.
Maybe we Twitch it.
The thing that started making me change my tune when it came to UFC,
because I didn't used to be into it at all and then once I started looking at it from a purely like primal standpoint of like these are just two dudes trying to beat the shit out of each other
and once I started thinking about on that primal level like I was like way more into it for some
reason and it kind of just made me feel like a monster yeah bumped your t up yeah did you ever
get your results back no i never did it i didn't do it because i was waiting for our new health
insurance so i gotta go in and do it now bitch i still have the order form so yeah i gotta go get
my t checked thus concludes the combat sports minute that was that was solid that was solid
a lot of good intel there is the uh
ski jumping sports minute up next yeah let's talk about our friends over at zapier first
and then we can go ski jumping i i you know dylan you're aware of this growing a business is hard
especially when you're wasting hours every day moving data to emails to spreadsheets to your crm
to wherever you're telling me i mean like you're you're over there in day moving data to emails, to spreadsheets, to your CRM, to wherever? You're telling me.
I mean, you're over there in QuickBooks all the time,
just typing shit, whatever.
Just typing away.
What if I told you that there is an easy way to automate your work?
I would respond that I am very interested.
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We lost half the crew right before this read.
Dude, we might need to change the coffee situation we got going on here.
We're doing a little potty break.
It's just running through people in this office.
It's gas.
These guys just, the second we had to pivot, they just sprinted out of the room.
Yeah.
Dude, I hope one of them didn't have to go far stall.
Look, they're both here.
They're back.
Welcome back, guys.
We were worried about you guys.
Sorry.
Brett's got to get through there.
Unfortunate timing.
Kind of left you out to dry there.
No, it's okay.
Brett can confirm went into the far stall.
I guess he just wasn't thinking about it.
He pinches.
He goes, oh, uh.
What did I tell you to start this podcast, Brett?
I far-stalled it because Dave immediately went urinal, so I far-stalled it.
Alpha.
It's disgusting.
You just can't miss.
The guy who did that needs to be fired from his job in this office complex.
I might go knock on every door right now and be like, what are you doing?
I don't get it.
You're a professional.
How is it hard to just... I just don't get it.'re a professional how's it how's it hard to just i just don't get it how do you miss a toilet dog that's a misstep figure it out
you need to know that happened and rectify the situation afterward yeah it's on you i know it's
it's not a fun cleanup but you got to do it brett what are your takes what how did the ski and uh
how'd the ski jumping go last night it's electric these european venues there's like 50 000 people that watch these things the polish one the other
day was nuts uh zappa zappa something but that's that's like a cultural phenomenon this one was in
germany last night at villiagen have you ever seen one of these live holy shit no have you
no i imagine it's awesome though i also this. What do you guys think the world record ski jump is?
Feet-wise.
Feet.
128 feet.
No, that is way too low.
128 feet from Dylan.
That is way too low.
Oh, I don't know.
I'm going like...
How many feet are in a yard?
Three and a half?
I'm going like 700 feet.
Three?
700?
I didn't stutter.
What the fuck?
I'm going to go 450.
450 feet, which would be like a home run to dead center in every park in the country.
Correct.
It is 832 feet.
Holy shnikes.
Yes.
Dude, these guys are soaring.
It is insane.
I was watching, and the hill last night was a little bit small.
It's like almost three football fields.
Yes.
And it's unbelievable how, one, how lit these places are.
They go nuts.
Two, how fucking long they fly.
Last night was only like 130 to 150.
The world record is 253 meters, which is 832 feet.
You're like a dumbass with my guess, man.
You said 128 feet, though.
Yeah.
Look, I've never, you know. Those guys are going at such a rapid speed down such a steep incline and they
just hover for so long i didn't really think about it i immediately just all i did when i guessed was
two football fields plus some extra you were relatively close yeah you know when you get a
little bit uh too much air on a diving board and you start doing like the hands yes trying to catch
your balance thing like that's all i can think about when they're doing that like is how i would just
start flailing ski jumping maybe the one like that may be the winter olympic sport that would take me
the longest to try to do because it looks terrifying yeah like because you can't even like
i mean it would be really hard for like any of us to ski a downhill like we would we could
get through the course but we would be pizzaing at numerous times because it's so icy and terrible
ski jumping though like the the there's no taking any speed off of that like you have to just go
full bore you do here's what i'm going to propose right now. I have a couple connections in the bobsled community.
If we can get to a track, we can't do the four-man ourselves
because you need a brake man and a pilot who know what they're doing,
but we could go two and two.
We've got some listeners that are pilots.
Could they come just join us?
You want bobsled?
No, man.
Just as a rider?
Would you do skeleton?
That's the fucking scariest.
I think that's what I'm thinking of, the guy who bounces his head off a rail a few years ago,
like one of the most recent Olympics, and he died.
It's just not for me, I don't think.
You wouldn't get in a sled.
I'm to the point in my life where I don't want to risk things that could kill me.
I don't know.
I don't want a bobsled, is what I'm trying to say. I would like to do don't want a bobsled is what I'm trying to say.
I would like to do a tube down like a bobsled track.
I want to ice skate down a bobsled track.
Dude, I don't think any of these are good ideas.
Why don't you guys bobsled?
Literally all you do is get in and sit there and go down the hill.
Yeah, but.
There's four of us.
We could make a bobsled team right now if we wanted to.
Yeah, I don't know.
Can I be the break guy?
All right, fuck it.
I'm at the front, right?
I want to be the break guy.
Hey, I'll be there cheering you guys on, man.
That's all you'll do?
Just kind of sit there and watch us?
Yeah, I don't even get one of those.
Are you the John Candy?
I'll be the John Candy.
Yeah, but anyway, watch ski jumping one time. it gets a little repetitive by the end of it
but when when guys are going long it's electric
brett do you have any breaking news for us well well as a matter of fact i do i'm glad you asked
uh dylan what's up pal do you want to go super yachts uh transatlantic flights, or golf?
Ooh, I already know two of these.
I do too.
The transatlantic flight is wild.
It's insane.
Oh, yeah.
It's the flight that Sally and I took.
The British Airways?
Yes.
You took that?
You set the record?
No, no, no.
But I think it's the same flight that we were on to go to.
From where to where?
Wasn't it the Austin?
No, no, no.
JFK to Heathrow. Oh, sorry. I thought it was the same flight that we were on to go to. From where to where? Wasn't it the Austin? No, no, no. JFK to Heathrow.
Oh, sorry.
I thought it was the Austin flight.
It caught a storm.
Yeah.
And just rode that bitch like 800 plus miles per hour.
It was going 822 miles per hour airspeed wise or ground speed wise.
Excuse me.
Because if you're going airspeed at 822, you're breaking the sound barrier.
If you're breaking the sound barrier in 747, you're going to die.
The plane's going to break apart.
Do you think the...
They should have been going that fast.
Do you think the pilot's just like,
this is your pilot. We are riding an absolute fucking wave right now.
We are tearing through the skies right now.
We're going to get there about an hour early.
How early did you get?
An hour and a half early.
Here's the sneaky part.
We are nuking.
If you're on a transatlantic red-eye flight and you get the wake-up call at like 4 a.m.,
are you kind of like, what the fuck?
I'm pissed.
Now I'm in London at 5 in the morning.
So I fell asleep super hard on that flight.
Like I slept like a rock.
Fell asleep hard?
Hard.
What were you watching?
Dude, I was gone.
Little women.
Yeah.
But it was actually Timothy Shunt in Dude, I was gone. Little women. Yeah. Yeah.
But it was actually Timothy Shunt in there, man.
Okay.
Yeah, and I woke up in a daze anyway because I was like, whoa, it's light outside now.
Like, what's going on?
Like, yeah, waking up an hour earlier than that when they're serving breakfast, it would have been very jarring.
Yeah.
I almost think you want the whole – if you're planning on the whole six and you
take a half of a zan or something like you want the whole six yeah and i'm no engineer but that
doesn't seem like super safe i don't those planes aren't designed to go 800 plus right the the
tailwind was 200 miles an hour wow so there's like i don't know how much you can do yeah you should
have pizzaed that That's crazy.
Yeah, you got to pizza.
I would be uncomfortable.
Slow that plane down.
I wonder if they notified the passengers of what was going on.
Hey, by the way, we're absolutely cruising right now.
I think they could tell looking out the window.
Did you get a pilot voice there, Dave?
Hmm?
I mean, I was a passenger for a second.
I just got transported.
Sorry.
I was just curious.
Can you look out the window and be like, oh, going kind of fast?
I don't think so.
Really moving through these clouds quickly.
But if you do have the little, like, if you have, like, the Delta tracker on, which I watch instead of entertainment.
Oh, yeah.
It shows your speed.
It shows your ground speed.
And if you're, like, if you get up to 700 and then you cross, I didn't know this.
If you cross the sound barrier in the air with a tailwind,
it's very different than on the ground because it's relative to the air around you.
So they were going like 600 and something airspeed,
but relative to the ground, you're obviously going 825.
Is there still a sonic boom?
No, there's not.
Damn.
Because of the airspeed?
Because of the air around you.
I need a sonic boom if I'm going to break the barrier.
I see. Exactly.
I see.
Exactly.
So basically it's 825 minus the tailwind. The boom song from POD when they started just cruising.
No, he put on saliva.
I mean, you got to eventually slow that big-ass bird down, you know?
So it takes a lot of stopping.
Yeah.
And so they landed at Heathrow at 4.43 a.m.
I'd just kind of be like, well, that sucks.
So what, an hour early, you said?
Hour and a half.
You think the pilots were just hype as fuck
in the cockpit, just like dapping each other up?
Like, look at this shit.
They set a record.
They set a record.
Is that a tight record?
Fastest transatlantic subsonic flight, right?
Because the Concorde used to be able to do that shit
in like three hours.
But yeah, that did break the sound barrier yeah that thing goes fast as my aunt and uncle took the concord once dude it was like what's the concord yeah i thought it was really balling
about how they did that is a retired uh commercial airliner that was designed to go super fast
and it just wasn't cost efficient so they took it out of commission. Also a couple devastating crashes
in the span of two or three months.
Wow.
Yeah.
Hey, Dylan.
Hey, man.
You know who the new world number one is?
In what?
In golf.
I don't.
Rory McIlroy.
Is it really?
Rory McIlroy.
I was going to say Jim Furyk or Sneds.
No.
Rory's back on top after, I believe, not playing this weekend.
Love it.
So who was?
Love it.
Was it DJ?
DJ?
Who was one?
And then he went, DJ went 78 yesterday, by the way.
Love that move, though.
Tough conditions.
Yeah.
You got to go out there and prove that you can still flirt with 80.
Shoot your age.
So Rory's back on top.
Tigers top six
Americans, which puts him in the Olympic
contention. Is he gonna play
the match play?
He is
world rankings. He's up there, right?
Yeah. He played last year.
Speaking of WGC world rankings, Spieth is back in the top 50.
That's good.
He had a nice round yesterday.
He needs that.
Yes, he did.
He was a low Sunday guy.
I'm starting to worry, as I have been for like a year and a half.
A text from inside the Spieth camp said this, Will and Dylan.
He's close, and I'm not just saying that.
Okay.
End quote.
We'll see.
How many times you heard that?
He's going to go top four at the Masters, though,
and people are going to think he's bad.
That's his course.
He'll show out at the Masters.
Yep.
Yeah.
He plays really well.
So he's in contention to play.
Do you want to make a bet?
What's the bet?
I don't know.
Top 10?
Oh.
12.
Oh, I'll make that bet.
I'll do the Freddie Couples' top 10 on Friday.
Let's do top 15.
Y'all going to put big boy stacks on it?
How much?
Should we do a big boy stack?
Do it.
I don't even know how much that is.
Do it, Dylan.
One big boy stack.
Okay, we'll do one big boy stack.
I say he finishes.
Do you get T15?
Yeah. You get T15? Okay.
So 16th or worse, I get
a big boy stack. Okay.
Okay.
I left out how I threw out top 10 and you
just changed it to 15.
Pretty much immediately. Goodness of your heart.
No, it's out of my doubt for Jordan Spieth.
Okay. I want the
best for him. I just don't have a lot of faith right now.
Nor should you.
Does he play well at ACC?
Is that a home course per se to him or no?
No.
I wouldn't say so.
No, I think he's on record saying he loves playing at that course,
but he doesn't play particularly well.
Same, because he's got like everybody like the little youngs of the actually i did shoot in the 30s on one
of the nines uh when we went out that one time i think i got like a 38 or 39 did you no shit yeah
and then i i think i like quadruple bogeyed like the next three holes so an easy track at all very
tough he's also got like the the hometown pressure i know it's not it's not his hometown but like
um he's got people like the li Youngs of the world being like,
Hey, Jordan.
Hi, Lily.
What was the final piece of breaking news?
I was telling Dylan ahead of this podcast
that Bill Gates apparently bought a
$644 million yacht.
Is that worth more? That's bigger
than Bezos?
Yeah, I think it's in the big swinging dick
measurement contest of billionaires.
I think it beat his like 300 and something million dollar yacht.
How do you beat Jeff Bezos and not have the most expensive yacht in the world?
Well, here's the deal.
That's embarrassing.
Hydrogen power.
Here's the deal.
He didn't buy it.
It was all a ruse.
Who?
Bill Gates.
Bill Gates.
Oh.
Bill Gates has not, in fact, bought a $644 million yacht.
What the hell?
Unfortunately, all information in these recent articles is incorrect,
as told by the CINO Yacht Architecture and Design Company.
The yacht was presented at the Monaco Yacht Show in 2019 to Mr. Bill Gates, but
was not in fact sold.
Dude, what a tease.
What a whip. The yacht has a helipad,
a gym, an infinity pool,
and is hydrogen powered.
A yacht infinity pool is
cocky. I like that a lot.
Do you think it's salt water?
I don't know. You gotta think
he's running salt through there. I don't know. You gotta think he's running salt through there.
I don't know. Hard to say.
Great question. Better for your skin.
But yeah, the yacht has not been sold
and is open
to all client interest.
So if we want to pool our
funds. I still
think we're there yet. Could that be the new stew?
That doesn't seem
efficient to me.
You think they would throw in new stew? That doesn't seem efficient to me. Okay.
You know?
You think they would throw in a stew?
Like, hey, guys, like one request.
Can we put a podcast studio in here?
Yeah, can we turn?
Yeah, but what would you turn in the podcast studio?
Like the wine cellar?
The gym?
I mean, we don't need that on the fucking gym.
No, we need it, too.
Why?
I'm trying to put a big boy weight.
You just need one peloton in your room.
Shut the fuck up, dude.
Dude, you think I'm going to go sit at the infinity pool and not look jacked?
Yes.
No, I have to go get a pump in before I go to the infinity pool.
Dude, you walk by the infinity pool on the way to the gym, you're stopping.
Like, fuck this.
I'm not going to work out today.
I'm just going to chill here.
No, you got to get a quick pump in so that you're just like, I don't know.
You're chilling in the pool.
Just like an eight-minute pump.
All right. Yeah. Just get the the pool. Just like an eight-minute pump. All right.
Yeah.
Just get the bands out.
I'm trying to get big.
Get the blood flowing.
Yeah, catch me doing the clay at Paradise.
If you're that rich, you have the workout pill.
Like, that exists, right?
And you're just popping, like, you're popping the workout pill.
You would think that Bezos would have access to said pills,
and he doesn't look like he's in tip-top.
Jeff Bezos?
He's fucking jacked. Bill Gates is probably a better
example. Wait, is Bezos jacked? Yeah.
Are you sure? Really?
Catch me googling Jeff Bezos
shirtless right now.
That's interesting. It's almost like him being the wealthiest
man in the world is
somehow allowing him to be jacked. He's really doing it.
Okay.
He looks like HGH Dads at Gold's Gym.
Yeah, he's definitely on something.
That's Juice Dad.
Dude, sneaky calves on Bezos as well.
How do you have sneaky calves?
You just wouldn't expect Bezos to have these giant calves.
They're sneaky, dude.
You see Bezos also bought, for Valentine's Day,
he's buying a straight up $150 million mansion for his girlfriend.
Wow.
It's a nice gift.
I don't know how we're going to match that.
This is just further proof that I would date Jeff Bezos.
I was just going to take my wife to the Cheesecake Factory.
They have a really big menu.
All right, man.
Comprehensive.
Should we get out of here?
Yeah.
Hell of a Monday.
Big Monday.
Hell of a Monday.
Can we pull back the curtain for what we're about to do?
No.
Oh, yeah.
There's a kid coming in.
We're about to interview a new intern.
Whoa.
Potential new intern.
Potential new intern.
We'll see how it goes.
We'll see.
He better impress us. I'll just say that. If he gets hired. We'll see how it goes. We'll see. He better
impress us. I'll just say that. If he gets hired, we'll have
him on the pod soon and later.
We have four chairs in here. I'll sit on the floor.
I'll take one for the team.
I think I got applesauce on the floor.
Should we put him on the couch?
It's black leather. The casting couch?
Let's just put him on the couch and just make him sit there.
I think I got to bounce, man. Can you just have him call me later?
Yeah. Wait for real? No. We just have him call me later? Yeah.
Wait for real?
No.
We'll have him FaceTime you.
All right.
Let's get out of here.
Bye. Bye.
Bye. Outro Music