Circling Back - The Dillon Cheverere Starter Kit
Episode Date: January 23, 2019To help news listeners learn more about us, we had our first installment of "Starter Kit" beginning with The Dillon Cheverere Start Kit. We also enter The Steam Room to discuss Dave's neighbor's egreg...ious actions and Will's ongoing battle with West Elm. To top it all off, we circle back on The Bachelor. (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (14:40) The Dillon Cheverere Starter Kit (32:19) The Steam Room (48:25) Breaking Down Phil Mickelson’s Recovery Tactics (55:52) Circling Back on The Bachelor Support us on Patreon and receive episodes every Friday for just $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Use HIMS: www.hims.com/steam Shop Harry's Razors: www.harrys.com/circlingback Twitter: www.twitter.com/circlingbackpod Instagram: www.instagram.com/circlingbackpod Visit: www.circlingbackpodcast.com --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
all right we're back circling back podcast live from austin texas my name Will DeFries to my right. Dave Ruff. Morning boys. Beautiful day for some
podcasts, huh? Yeah. It's really cold outside by the way. Sunny and cold. Beautiful day though. I
love mornings like this. We needed podcasts. Well tell them what you just did. I muscle memory
kicked in. I mashed that record button and I said the name of the incorrect podcast to start off this episode of Circling Back.
It's going to happen a few times.
That is truly hilarious.
Wow.
People make mistakes.
What are the odds?
Hey, I would like, before we get into anything, I would like to apologize for a mistake I made last episode.
I had the sensitivity, for lack of a better word, on my mic turned literally all the way up for the entirety of the podcast.
And I had to do some work in post-production to make it sound at least tolerable.
Listenable.
To everyone who reached out, I apologize.
To everyone who said, you know what?
It wasn't that bad except for the first five seconds.
I appreciate you.
First few seconds were very, very hot.
Hot mic.
I could see knee-jerk dudes just getting really mad in their cars when they're driving to work.
Like, oh, that's going to sound like shit.
No, it's just a couple seconds.
But thank you all for enduring the storm.
This one should be much better.
We'll see.
I'm going to take a page out of Dave's playbook and say I'm gone off that Folgers-Columbian medium dark right now.
It's hitting just right.
I'm actually back on mcdonald's really
not the drive-through version but they're they're beans really we've been brewing their beans for a
long time they make a fine bean they really do yeah i i mean i've been i've been hitting the
in-house roasted central market blend of uh it's the breakfast blend it's actually their cheapest
blend i don't care for breakfast
buns i don't know the difference i need something that i can i can enjoy all day i don't know the
difference between anything there's not there's not a difference i get the cheap they put like
eggs and stuff like dry egg batter it's like yeah that makes sense it's 9.99 compared to the other
ones that are like 11.99 wow dude bargain shopper the way, who was it that told me that a dark blend
doesn't hit as hard
as the lighter blend?
Probably me.
It's true.
Explain.
It makes no sense to me,
to my brain.
If you think that
any part of my brain
knows how caffeine
and coffee beans work,
then you think
way too highly of me.
Okay.
100%.
Like, those, yes.
Darker roasts
yield less caffeine. It's a common mistake. I used to think that way. I used to think, oh, those, yes, darker roasts yield less caffeine.
It's a common mistake.
I used to think that way.
I used to think, oh, those go harder.
Common sense would tell you the opposite.
Yeah.
But why?
No one knows.
I didn't know the science then, and I don't know why that.
Nobody knows, Dave.
Starbucks has a blonde roast that goes super hard.
Really?
Oh, is she the barista that you're always telling me about?
Yeah.
Her name's Tanya.
The one with the piercings?
Yeah.
She's got hand tattoos and stuff.
It's super sexy.
I'm going to get called out for this.
You said that in a very seductive way.
Yeah, you did.
To be fair, I really never go to Starbucks unless I'm with a squad.
We went yesterday.
If I need to get a tinky off.
Literally yesterday.
Which is what I did yesterday.
You did the trash move yesterday at a business lunch where you didn't eat.
Dude, I...
Dude, come on.
You had to tell the waitress, oh, I'm not eating.
Well, I thought about hitting you guys up beforehand and being like, hey, I just ate
like a pretty big like breakfast, like late breakfast, so I'm probably not going to eat
at this.
And then I was like, no.
Just order a bowl of fruit.
I'm not going to order a bowl.
That's like weirder to order a bowl of fruit. I'm not going to order a bowl. That's weirder, to order a bowl of fruit
rather than just enjoy a nice iced tea with lemon.
You're like the dude in high school
who just goes and eats chips and salsa
and then tells the waitress,
no, I'm actually not eating.
I was not that dude.
Actually, I was probably that dude.
You can't get a bowl of fruit at a business lunch.
Yeah.
Literally no one's doing that.
We knew the gentleman we were with.
Yeah, I'll have an iced tea and a bowl of fruit, please.
You had an iced tea?
Yeah. I thought about getting iced tea and a bowl of fruit, please. You had an iced tea? Yeah.
I thought about getting a side salad or something,
but that was just purely for curb appeal at that lunch.
I don't actually want that side salad, and I don't need to spend it.
It was a business expense.
You could have already bought it.
It was like $9 for a side salad.
It was a $700 lunch.
Curb appeal?
What's curb appeal?
At the dinner table?
Yeah.
Like someone walks by, by oh that guy knows what
he's doing oh that guy's he's the guy's eating a dope ass salad but you don't even want it you
just want the optics to look good yeah that's dumb i also thought about getting some shishito
peppers but then i was like that's not gonna end well if i'm just sitting there eating an appetizer
of shishito peppers shishito peppers go hard though they do i like it when they use the big
flake salt on top
of them you know i'm talking about like energy yeah no i don't it goes if you haven't already
go follow circling back pod on twitter and instagram also make sure you mash that subscribe
button on apple podcast and spotify i'm going to reiterate what i said last podcast if there's
any platforms that you want or you can't find us right now, reach out and we'll try to make it happen.
Google Play, Stitcher, whatever.
We will try.
Also, if you're listening,
this is our Wednesday episode.
Our next episode
is a Friday episode.
It is only on patreon.com
slash circlingbackpodcast.
It's $5.
You get a weekly
listener voicemail episode
every single Friday.
And I don't know, you might get some additional content as well
you wrote a column
I got a column off on Monday
it was the first time I had written a column in like
what feels like years
there's a lot of bonus content on Patreon
not just your Friday episode
it's a subscription based so it's $5 a month
yeah
it's essentially a little over $1 an episode
$1.25 or some weeks it might be
a dollar an episode. Which is a steal
if you hear the content that we're putting out.
Also,
a note on Patreon.
Well, a few notes.
To the 2,000 plus people that have already signed up,
y'all are kings and queens. Thank you.
We love you. Also,
I've been notified that you get an email
every time we post on Patreon.
If this annoys you, go into your settings on Patreon and change them.
And you don't have to get an email every time we post.
Yeah, it's a little much.
I would prefer that you do that because it has me trigger shy.
Yeah, we're a little gun shy at the moment.
We want to get content out to you, but we don't want to just fill your inbox.
We're not trying to fill your inbox right now.
We'll fill your inbox, but...
But what?
You were trying to make a weird joke there?
No, no, no.
I was going to say...
I thought you were taking a sex direction.
No, I don't do that kind of humor, sir.
Dylan, please get your head out of the gutter.
I just thought that's what Dave was going for.
He's a pervert.
He's not.
I'm sorry.
Damn, that was pretty aggressive.
Sorry, Alyssa.
I didn't mean that.
Doesn't apologize to me. Nah. He's not. I'm sorry. Damn, that was pretty aggressive. Sorry, Alyssa. I didn't mean that.
He doesn't apologize to me.
Nah.
Just your wife.
My wife.
We do Borat jokes here.
Yeah.
We actually, so we didn't want to tell this to the people that aren't subscribed on Patreon,
but we actually do the entire listener voicemail episode in different Sacha Baron Cohen voices.
Yeah, I'm going to be doing Bruno this Fridayiday um we're gonna have the exercise bike in here only true bruno fans will understand that um what are we doing today well we've got a big episode ahead of us
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On my way in to record this podcast, I was at the Light.
William Cannon and they pronounce it Manchac.
It looks like Manchaca.
And I was going to make a left.
And I'm in the left lane.
And I'm watching the woman behind me.
I just happened to notice that she was, had her phone out and we're waiting there at the red light. And she's clearly trying
to get a selfie off of her, of her face. You know, she was fixing her hair and then she, you know,
was taking different, different shots. And then the light turned green. We got the left arrow.
So I go and I'm like oh she's gonna fuck this for
everybody behind her i go i look as i'm turning about 40 yards behind me she's still there and
she does the thing where she slams on the gas to like make up for it because it's turning yellow
she gets through it about four or five cars behind her didn't get through it because she was she was
getting a selfie off at the red light are you kidding me i was i was so mad for them if the
that irritates me so much i wasn't in so mad for them if the oh that irritates
me so much i wasn't in the in the line and i see that happen with people texting quite a bit yeah
she was absolutely getting a selfie off that's it takes it up 10 10 more notches for me
unbelievable i respect it she was just doing content no no nope your content cannot affect
other motors if i if i miss a light because you're trying to get content off and your driver's
in your car.
She was trying to get a grandma off.
Nah.
Come on.
I hate that.
I'm going to hit you with a roast hand if you do that to me.
That's getting off easy.
At a minimum.
That's getting off easy.
I was turning the other day, and you know how sometimes they have the walk
thing?
It tells the pedestrian to walk?
Yeah.
I was turning, and I saw that a gentleman was walking
across the street i could have done the rude move of just jetting in front of him and going
there was enough room but instead i stopped and i let him walk uh he looked over at me
and he just pointed at the walk sign and just looked at me and i was like dude this is super
aggressive as if i was like you did the right thing yes i stopped
and i was stopped right there wait did you look real put off no sometimes you have put off face
no no i was i was very happy and like i was i was getting ready to wave him on and uh because i
didn't want to put him out he was in the right and so then when he finally got across the street
he just looked back at me and just shook his head dude and i was like dude what are you doing so then i got that's when i did get mad and i put the window down and what'd you say
i just yelled twice to him i stopped i stopped whoa you got him good he was not happy
did he look like someone who was maybe a drifter? No.
He looked like a well-put-together person?
No, but he was not a drifter.
Somewhere in the middle.
He just looked like a dude who really was not happy with his life.
Oh, fuck, dude.
Okay.
He just looked like a dude who, he was a male-end dude. He just did not care at this point in his life.
Okay.
I have another observation I'd like to to share if you guys don't mind i know this was this just came to me this
is observation hour let's do it i apologize so when i'm walking randy randy's my dog and pretty
much any dog i'm hoping you can attest to this you know do you ever get to the point where you
know they're on the leash and you walk and they're sniffing something and you keep walking and you're like, come on, come on.
And you kind of get louder and louder.
And then they finally look up and acknowledge you.
And then they overcompensate and they kind of run in front of you to hurry up.
Like, oh, I didn't do anything wrong.
We're not losing time.
We're chill.
Randy did that yesterday. and it reminds me of people who, while sitting at a red light, if they're on their phone or something,
when the light turns green and they wait for a sec,
and they realize, oh shit,
they just gun it.
Like they freak out,
and their instinct is to just floor it.
That's why I have a heavy honk hand now.
But it is pretty embarrassing
when you're not paying attention to the light,
and you're first up,
and then someone has to honk at you
to get your attention,
because you're being an idiot,
getting selfies off. It's so funny that your first instinct though is like well uh it's to make up for the time you wait not only am i gonna make up for it but i think the other thing at play is
i don't want to make eye contact or have to see these people again because i'm embarrassed so i
gotta get the fuck out of here they catch up to you at the next light and you like they pull next
to you that's when you get in the right lane and just turn and find an alternate route. You can't face these people.
I, yeah, I absolutely do that.
But I'm very hard on Sally when it comes to...
Your what?
Texting and driving.
Like, she likes to have her phone
and do stuff at red lights and stuff like that.
And I will get mad at her.
So I have to hold myself to a high standard.
And now I just find that I just zone out at lights.
I just start thinking about stuff.
You just pick fights with people walking across the street, apparently.
Dude, that guy was a hater.
I've had a real big problem with daydreaming while I drive lately,
and I've been missing turns because of it.
Actually, just now on the way here,
in the neighborhood, I missed a turn
because I was just thinking about shit.
Wow, dude.
What were you thinking about?
Just all kinds of...
Swimming pools?
Dope-ass stuff.
Probably this company related stuff i just just be thinking about stuff you washed media
yeah big picture you'd be thinking i'd just be thinking
oh the starter kit thing i'm excited for all right so this is a pack starter kit starter kit okay or starter pack which one i like starter
kit i like kit okay i was on reddit and i was scrolling and a suggested subreddit was
oh they actually call it starter pack we'll do kit we'll do kit uh and i went through it and i
was like these are pretty funny like it's just like the uh one of my favorite ones that i've
ever seen was just uh from we actually mentioned him Like, it's just like the, one of my favorite ones that I've ever seen was just from,
we actually mentioned him last episode.
He's getting gassed up.
27 male NYC.
He did the, I'm not running in gym class starter kit.
And it was just like, it was funny.
As you can imagine, it was like a pair of skate shoes,
a cookie monster, flat brim hat.
Like, you know what I'm talking about.
But I was like, this is funny.
And then I started thinking, you know what? We've about yeah but i was like this is funny and then i
started thinking you know what we've got some new listeners on this podcast they need to get to know
us so we should do a starter kit for each of us okay right now today we're not going to do all
of us we're just going to start off with one person uh we picked or i picked dylan
this is going to turn into a roast and not just a... This is what Dylan's about.
It's just going to be a roast.
Yeah, it might turn into somewhat of a roast.
I already know basically what you guys are going to say.
Dave, how do you want to do this?
Do you want to go back and forth?
Do you want me to start it?
Do you want to go back and forth and just like...
How many each do you guys have prepared?
I have...
I've got just like four or five.
I have about a dozen.
We were talking about this while you were in the gentleman's room.
We have some overlap, so I'm just going to defer to Will on a lot of it.
But it's a lot of it's people who have been listening to the three of us do podcasts are going to be like, oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
New people.
This is how you get to know Dylan.
Today's all about Dylan Chivary.
This is exciting.
How many of these are related to me being the old guy just calm
down don't worry about it just let the thing happen chill that's the one thing that gets to
you it's crazy you know what that doesn't even get to me i'm not kidding it really doesn't
okay ready yeah i've gotten again that you bet lead off okay you put off lead off vibes um
referencing an eight month old trap music song that everyone's already played out.
Trap or rap?
Trap.
Well, it could be rap, but I feel like it's mainly like either a mumble rap or just a
trap beat or something that you just discovered somehow.
I had a trap phase a couple years ago.
I went hard on it for like three, probably three months.
To be fair dylan does
introduce most of those songs to me for the first time thank you you're like like a step ahead of me
when it comes to that stuff but i also not saying my i have no interest in listening to a lot of
that music that's like part of who i am you know i'd like i'm yeah that's why it's part of your
starter kit yeah to go next i will say that i, I will say that on the flip side of this,
Dylan also just gets into super emotional rappers,
namely Drake and Post Malone.
I don't know why Post Malone gets hate from you guys
and I see people on Twitter hating on him too.
That is one talented dude.
Yeah, he's talented.
He is fucking good.
But when we went to the Players Championship last year,
Dylan just put on Post Malone for the entire trip
Because it was tight
And his album had just come out
Like three days prior
Yeah, and you somehow ruined it in a matter of hours
Dude, he goes hard
Okay, let's blow the doors off this thing
Don't come at Posty
We're not coming at Post as much
So we all stayed in this nice
What was it?
Beach house
Beach inside condo?
Yeah
We're all sharing it.
And like we get there and within hours we're showering,
getting ready to go do an event with the tour.
Shout out to Michelle.
And we just hear Post Malone,
like from start to finish that album playing,
like getting ready,
like music.
So like Dylan,
it was,
I felt like we were on spring break or something,
and we were sophomores in college.
You know what's funny?
I use Apple Music, and I try to...
There are a good seven songs in that album that I legit like a lot.
So I put them on my playlist that I listen to all the time.
For whatever reason, the explicit versions of the song would not let me...
I couldn't carry those over to the playlist.
So when I did did it would just
it would bring up the radio edit version that stinks so that's all like that's all i there's
nothing i like more than listening to clean post malone i know and those a lot of the songs are
just have it's like every other word's fuck and i can't i can listen to the radio version all the
time it's weird it got to the point where d where Dylan kept trying to get us to bong beers. No.
He literally asked the PGA,
like, hey,
is there any way
you guys can take us
to the tournament in Bentley?
Yeah.
They were like, no.
We provided you with bikes.
Just ride those, dumbass.
Yeah.
Remember that first bike ride?
We did ride those bikes.
Remember that first bike ride?
Yeah.
I was quite sweaty.
We took the long route.
Yeah.
Who's fault was that? It was mine. Okay. okay i took a wrong turn dave do you have another one you want to bring a bike ride uh
yeah uh eighth grade basketball shorts at the gym like really like that go well beyond the knee
are just baggy ill-fitting yeah just real head scratchers to what dorn's doing i will have you
know that i was i've been shamed thoroughly when it comes to those,
and I have replaced them with one of those bougie athleisure brands.
I'm not saying that you need to wear the highest of high end.
No.
But those shorts are the lowest of low end.
I don't see what's so bad about them.
It looks like you went to a discount sporting goods store in a rush,
and you were just like, I need a pair of shorts just right now.
What do you got?
And they were like, we have these ones.
And you were like, yeah, I'll take them.
You know what, though?
I go to the gym to put in work.
I'm not there to look hot.
I go there.
I throw big boy weights around.
I take a shower, and I'm out.
Look good, feel good, play good.
I feel like you only do shoulders.
That's another part of your starter kit.
You're only doing shoulders on the cable machine every time I see you.
And I know it's just that our—
You must be catching me on Wednesday.
I must be.
Today's shoulder day.
There you go.
I'll see you at the gym later on the cables.
Maybe so.
I'll again piggyback off of what Dave said with one of mine,
which is just struggle-ass gym socks.
Oh, my God.
You have those socks that ride so high up your calf
that it's just like, with a hole in it,
it's just like, dude, what are you doing?
If I can see the heel cap outside of your shoe,
that's it.
The heel cap.
It's done.
So it's a white sock with a gray heel cap,
and it's just kind of struggling
to pull its way out of the shoe.
It's just gasping for air.
That's a really, really trash talk.
Dylan's new balances
smell terrible.
And I don't,
I don't understand
why those,
why the heel cap
is so far back.
That's like for a size 16 person.
Because you've had those socks
for a decade.
Yeah,
like you don't need those anymore.
These are some of my worst socks right here.
You are wearing
some awful socks right now.
These are the worst ones.
We take our shoes off
before we come into this
place we record
as a sign of respect.
So we're all wearing socks and doing...
We're all wearing kimonos right now.
These are like the mid-ankle socks. They go up...
They're so bad. And they're... It's worn out
so they scrunch down, but not
in a good way. Oh,
God. Oh, my... Dude!
I'm telling you, these are the worst socks I've ever made. Dude, they cover your entire
Achilles. They're the worst socks I've ever seen.
Look at that. I can't even just... It's like you're wearing, like, your entire Achilles. They're the worst socks I've ever seen. Look at that.
I can't even just... It's like you're wearing your dad's socks when you're like six years old.
Yeah, that's exactly what it looks like.
It's like that sock had a previous life as a hand puppet.
No one's doing socks that come up this high.
It's like between ankle and tooth.
It's no man's land.
It's no man's land.
Dude, it's bad.
I know.
You can't...
I enjoy it.
What if you meet the love of your life at like a coffee shop or something,
and she looks down and she's like, I'm wearing pants, though.
Yeah, but what if you prop the leg up, do a cross,
and you're showing a little bit of ankle?
I am conscious enough of a sock situation that I don't do that.
I wear no-shows pretty much at all times,
and a lot of mine are trash because my dog chews them.
But, like, yours are visibly trash to the general public look i admit these are really terrible socks did y'all
ever used to do the broke boy thing as a kid where you didn't have the short socks so you had the
long ones you put them on and then you folded them down and rolled it back over your foot it was so
uncomfortable dude that was the why did you ever do the did you ever do the thing like in elementary school or middle school
where you didn't have any clean underwear,
so you just wore gym shorts under your pants?
No.
Never did that?
My mom used to take care of it.
I never did that.
I would rather just free ball.
I would too.
I didn't have that kind of innovation.
I did it probably once a school year.
I'd go to school with a pair of umbros on underneath my pants.
I miss umbros, though.
Those are tight.
You don't have to miss them.
I know they're still around.
You can still buy them.
But I can't do it right now.
Why, dude?
They go hard.
And they're too soccer-y for me now.
I used to mix them in with the lotto shorts.
Lotto shorts show that you're true Italian luxury.
That was my shit.
Don't say italian luxury
yeah dylan's got a real problem with the italian people we've established that i'm not the italians
what are you talking about oh dave do you have another uh dylan starter yeah hunt and peck
typing yeah i do that for a guy who's been in the blog game longer than maybe both of us combined
you're you're like old school blog game.
Yeah.
And you somehow managed to do it Hunt and Peck style.
I don't know what happened to me along the way.
I mean, I took keyboarding classes.
I think we all did in school.
And I did fine in them.
But right when I left, I just went back.
It just feels more natural to me to use my index fingers and look down.
I can do it pretty pretty quick i attribute part of the reason that uh i'm i am where i am in the blog game i
attribute it to typing on like aol instant messenger and msn messenger when i was younger
because i can get my thoughts out almost as fast as i can type like my typing is very fast all right limitless hunting and pecking would completely screw over
my mojo yeah the mike francesco of blogging yeah look it i don't know what to say i wish i was a
regular regular i could type properly but i can't i mean it just feels so foreign to me when I try to do that.
I don't know.
What do you got, Will?
We talked about some good ones.
Chicken fried steak.
Oh, yeah.
What's that about?
That's like your go-to meal.
I mentioned that one time about what my last meal would be.
Dylan said that his favorite food is chicken fried steak.
I didn't say it's my favorite food.
You said something similar.
I can count on zero hands how many times I've ever seen Dylan order a chicken fried steak. Because it's battered in gravy. I don't say it's my favorite food you said something similar i can count on zero hands how many times i've ever seen dylan order a chicken fried steak oh because it's batter and
gravy i don't eat it then why did you say it was your go-to meal because i didn't say it was my
go-to meal i said if it could be my if it was my like what my last meal being like probably chicken
fried steak because it'd just be really heavy and gross and and uh gross meaning like you know
unhealthy but it would taste great.
I love chicken fried steak.
I'd rather just do a steak that isn't chicken fried.
That's a fine choice, too.
It's one of my favorite meals, too.
But chicken fried steak just goes, it just hits different.
I'm sorry.
It's an overrated southern food.
I love it.
I will say it.
It's breaded beef with gravy with with great but it's not good
beef it's like the low quality like flank steak you're right you're right i mean i'd rather have
like uh like beef wellington oh god here we go what here we go come on honestly you're not eating chicken fried steak for the steak.
You're eating it for the gravy.
A good gravy can cover up a mediocre chicken fried steak.
A good gravy on a properly battered chicken fried steak is delicious.
It's not bad.
I just think it's a little bit overrated.
Okay.
And it's weird that you eat it five times a week.
Do you have more, Dave?
What? No. five times a week. Do you have more, Dave? Dave's looking at me like he wants to say something, but he's scared.
No, I'm not.
The Dylan's significantly older than our demo jokes.
Yeah, they're there.
They're overplayed.
I'm like nine months older than Dave, by the way.
I know, but it just feels like so much more.
You put out a fatherly present.
Because you're with child.
Because you're literally a father.
That's another one from the homie.
Yeah, we get it, dude.
We have a kid.
Cool.
We get it.
You had sex.
Congrats on the sex.
I also have just like general cockiness regarding everything from allegedly perfect grammar
to throwing a football to just
being good at every sport apparently that's fair i do have the best grammar of anyone i've ever known
i don't know i mean i've only seen you type out stuff in short form email or on twitter i would
need to see more long form content from you okay yeah it's easy to have it when you just do like
really short you and stuff.
You know, I have a pretty extensive catalog on a couple websites that I could mention to you.
Yeah, I just never got into that stuff.
I also have fake deep voice.
Yeah, that's fair.
It's fake.
Who's more fake, him or Cliff Kingsbury?
What does Cliff Kingsbury do?
He has a voice that's three octaves lower than Dylan.
You know what's weird?
I hear what people are talking about when they say,
you sound like you're deepening your voice intentionally to make it sound deeper.
I hear what they're talking about, but I don't.
This is just what comes out when I talk.
I don't know.
It be like that sometimes.
But I do get it, which is weird.
I should be fighting this thing, but I'm just like, yeah, I understand what you mean.
How about Henleys?
Yeah, it just so happens he's wearing one today.
Dylan spearheaded the Henley movement for a while.
I'm not really a Henley guy is the funny part.
You took Henley for a test drive, never brought the car back, and then drove it off a cliff.
You single-handedly ruined the Henley.
What are you talking about?
I barely ever wear Henleys, even though I have one on right now.
If you ask Dylan where he's at, like Tuesday night, he's at the Sizzler eating a chicken fried steak wearing a Henley.
And like sending an email with moderate grammar.
With my index fingers yeah i have one that i just
remembered this motherfucker is colorblind yeah oh yeah it's true it's true oh i got one uh just
always dating 18 year old girls yeah come on let's not do that yeah it's just this here for
this starter pack it's just a screenshot of dylan's bum. Yeah. It's just this here for this starter pack.
It's just a screenshot of Dylan's bumble settings.
And it's just 18 to 23.
Don't.
I don't want people to actually think that I do that.
So take that back.
Then you're always like, this is what I call my wheelhouse.
Dude, she's older than she seems.
I haven't dated. She's super mature for her age.
No, I haven't dated younger than mid-20s.
That's true.
Yeah, but mid can go...
What's mid?
I haven't dated anyone younger than 25.
And that's when I was younger than I am now,
when I started dating her.
To be fair to Dylan...
Well, yeah, you'd have to be younger than you are now
because you're currently the oldest you will ever be.
Like a whole year difference is what I'm saying. To be fair, the entire yeah you'd have to be younger than you are now Because you're currently the oldest you'll ever be Like a whole year difference is what I'm saying
To be fair the entire group text is like
Telling him to date younger than 25
Yeah to be fair
To be fair everyone's kind of telling Dylan to like
It's a link to some
Some Instagram profile saying
Dylan you should
You should DM this chick
Have you
Just be honest
Just be honest
Have you DM'd brief in The Bachelor yet?
No
No
I gotta
You gotta think her DMms are flooded right now i
want to stand out yeah you want to toss yours on top of the pile i'm gonna wait till the water's
calmed down yeah i want to throw it in the pile i want to stand i want it to stand out and it's
gonna it's gonna hit right we'll get to her let's make a video we'll get to her in a bit we're gonna
submit a video to submit her a video but about me wanting to date her yeah i don't know that's never ended poorly for any guy
that submitted a video hey i got one real estate professional all lowercase real estate professional
for some reason there's a linkedin account for dylan that is not actually dylan allegedly i
don't believe it but it says real estate professional in all lower caps. And there's no photo. It's so... What are you doing?
It's the most spare LinkedIn profile.
I didn't even start that.
Dude, who would do that? It's such high level
comedy. I didn't even know you had your real estate license.
I don't. Can you help me look for like a new place?
I was looking
for about 20 acres in the
hill country with water. Can you help me out?
Yeah.
Yeah, we'll find something for you.
Cool.
That's pretty much all I had for Dylan.
That's pretty much it.
I think you got off easy.
Yeah.
That was pretty...
About what I expected.
The only one that I really didn't like
and all that was dating the young girls.
I don't want people to think I actually do that.
They don't, dude.
They know we're joking.
Yeah, chill, dog.
It's a comedy. What if it was thatylan goes to the ut sorority house is joked
well i wasn't gonna say services every now and then no you i don't even know that one thank you
for putting that in my bank does not go to he goes to texas state that's true you're a big
you like if you look at if you look at dylan's uber history it's just like it's like 50 west six and then like 50 san marcos you're always saying the trifecta i'm like what are you
doing this weekend and we'll do this weekend in fun and then you'll be like we'll be like what
are you really doing and you'll go it's trifecta time and i'll go what's that you go zeta dz 80 pi
yeah san marcos let's do they still close the bars at like midnight in san marcos it's been
like a decade i was gonna, it'd be funny if...
How did you even know about that?
Because you guys have talked about it.
It'd be funny if Dylan just had Uber rides from San Marcos at like 12.01 p.m. or a.m.
to West 6 every single weekend.
That'd be funny.
Except not really.
It'd be funny.
Do you guys hear that?
It's getting a little warm in here.
Oh, my God.
We're not popping towels outside of the steam room.
I'm popping your bare ass.
You know how you like to...
Have you ever gotten the tip of it wet?
Rolled it up?
Dude, you could hurt somebody.
You could break skin.
You could break skin.
That's when it ends.
I'm going to break your skin, dude.
Guys, take off your kimonos and put your towels on.
All right, let me slide in.
Put my shower shoes on, too.
Hold on.
Will's going to go in like a private stall.
Yeah. Hey, can you guys look away for a second? Just look away. No, I me slide in. Put my shower shoes on too. Hold on. Will's going to go in like a private stall. Yeah.
Hey, can you guys look away for a second?
Just look away.
No, I want to see.
Don't look.
Don't look.
I want to see.
Don't look.
Show me.
You know what it is.
It's a steam room.
Oh, my God.
People who are just now listening to this are like, what is going on?
What is this?
Why are they doing this?
No one's doing this.
Dave, you said you had something to steam on today.
Yeah, let me get comfortable.
I got my flip flops on. on i'm gonna mash the steam button mash that steam button breathe in through your nose out through your mouth yeah i'm steaming i've got uh i've got
some trash neighbors i think i think i know who it is so it's just one neighbor and it may not
even be somebody from our neighborhood people walk over to the park all the time in austin at least in my neighborhood we've got vip trash service it's
baller shit you put your trash out they come and get it for you it's awesome but when they come and
get it it's oftentimes 9 a.m 10 a.. So your trash can is left out there by the curb.
Yeah.
You get home from work, from the podcast, let's say it's like 2 o'clock.
Your trash can's just been chilling out there.
What's been happening to me recently is I'll go to bring the trash can in the garage
because you don't want to be the trashy person who leaves it out there for two days.
Yeah.
I think they can fine you for that. Yeah, yeah, yeah they can i'll go out there to bring in the trash can
i'll look because a lot of times the little the garbage truck will leave it down with the lid off
someone has taken their doggy doo-doo bag you can't do this cleaned up their dog poo
tied it up and dropped it into my trash can keep in mind this is post pickup they come
once a week they come monday morning very early usually can i ask a question please do do you
take it out yourself or do you leave it in there and just throw your garbage on top of it
the poo yeah uh a lot of times i just leave it in there and it's only because it's winter yeah
now if it's the summer time when it gets to summer it's there. And it's only because it's winter. Now, if it's the summertime, that's going to be an issue.
Because it's going to heat up and stink up my garage.
And I don't want that.
You know how people say that when someone has a kid,
and you think about how gross it is to change a diaper,
and they're like, you get so used to it.
Dog poo is the same way.
That's how I felt with picking up dog poop.
Because as a kid, I never worried about it.
Because when I was really young and we had Springer Spandels, I never had to worry about picking up dog poop because like as a kid i never worried about it because we just had a when i was really young and we had springer spandrels i never had to worry about
picking up dog poop because i was young and that wasn't really a thing people did they just kind
of left it i feel like that's a recent development in dog etiquette and then we then when i was in
high school we had a yorkie and picking up that dog's poop like they're like pebbles and so
now that i've started doing it yes it was gross the first couple times just feeling
like the warmth of it.
But now I'm like, whatever.
It's fucking dog poop.
Who cares?
Now I'll like look at it and be like, is this chill?
Is there anything in here that shouldn't be in there?
I'm looking in there to see if Randman's eating some weird shit.
Yeah.
And like, I don't want other people's though.
No, absolutely not.
Because it's going to, first of all, this may speak to a lack of trash cans around
my neighborhood yeah but everybody who walks a dog who's a decent person at some point they're
gonna have to carry around a bag of poo for like more than half of their dog it's fine it happens
no one thinks you're weird it's not gross you if you have a quality bag you can't smell it
it's just it pisses me off that someone's going to just be like,
they'll never know.
I got something to say.
You've done this?
You need a nest cam.
I've done this before.
You're trash.
If I'm just being completely honest.
I've done it.
It's more disreason.
I would rather have somebody leave their dog's shit on my front lawn
than I would have them put a bag in
that's nonsense it's a trash can
it's for nasty shit
no one has a clean smelling
you gotta carry that to your house
I'm not saying it's the right thing to do
I'm saying it's not that you guys are overblowing
it's not that
trash can is for trash
and it's in a plastic bag
it's not like you're taking bare shit and throwing it in your trash can.
It's for my trash.
It's a trash can.
Who cares?
I care.
Who cares?
If I go take out my trash and I have to smell your dog's shit every time I do it for the next week.
It's wrapped up airtight in a bag.
If he tied properly, then he doesn't smell.
If it gets warm out.
It's true.
If it's tight.
This is Texas.
If it's tied properly, it's airtight.
And you haven't thought about the fact that if you throw a big bag of trash on top of it,
something could happen to that bag.
It's going to create super stink.
So it's just super stink.
That's my trash.
What if someone picks up, I don't know.
Maybe a dead animal.
Why not throw a dead animal in there, dude?
What if someone picks up just a piece of paper?
Harmless. Doesn't smell. Puts it in your trash can is that gonna offend you because no not really well that's
for your trash dave yeah but here's the difference a piece of paper is not doo-doo from a dog's
asshole yeah no no i get it says a lot about you think paper and poop i was going back to your
point that's my trash can for my trash that's the point i was addressing yeah and you know what if
someone wants to be a good samaritan and say, oh, here's some, I'm going to throw this
in this trash can.
It's a piece of paper because littering is bad.
You know what?
I don't mess with Texas either.
I applaud you.
Do that.
That's fine.
That's not going to stick.
You know what I think we need to do?
I draw the line of stuff that comes out of a dog's ass.
When you walk Randy and he poops and you pick up his poop in a plastic bag, where do you
put it?
I have a thing.
You have a thing?
I put it in the trash can.
Oh, so Randy's poop is okay because...
I don't need more poop in there.
But I'm addressing the points y'all are making.
That's poop in a trash can.
Actually, to be fair...
Yeah, but it's different still.
Because it's your dog?
No, no, no.
It's different because the people that are putting it in the trash can are doing it before like they're doing it in the beginning of that trash can's new life
after being what do you mean that's true it's different it has to be there for an entire week
okay it's there for a week to be fair i normally will throw it away at the park because randy
we rarely go around little trash bags they have trash cans there which is very convenient but um i don't need someone else's dog's poo i don't know what your
dog eats your dog probably eats shit yeah your dog could have a lot of dogs eat shit your dog
could have i don't know i don't know if it's vaccinations are up to date true i don't need
that look i'm not i'm not saying it's the right thing to do i'm saying it's not that big of a deal
this is saying a lot about you as a person if If I saw someone put dog shit in my trash can
that was out in front of my house,
I'd be like, eh, whatever.
Hey, why don't you just puke in my trash can
while you're at it, you drunk son of a bitch?
Maybe I will, bitch.
Bet you won't.
You don't even drink.
That is much more fucked up.
Puking in my trash can?
Than putting a dog's poop in a bag in your trash can.
Oh, and you know what makes it worse?
It's in a bag, it's tied up.
If it's raining
and I look down there and there's just like a
wet bag of poo,
I don't want that. I thought it was in your trash can.
It is in my trash can. Don't you have a lid on your trash can?
No, they leave the lid off.
I said this earlier, but you were over there being a jerk.
He was hunting. Oh, sorry. I was inserting an ad read
into you.
The
dump truck puts it down and it flings the top. Yeah, I'm starting an ad read into you. Beep, bop, boop, bop, beep. The dump truck puts it down
and it flings the top off
and there's nobody home
to put it back on.
Okay.
That's a little bit more sorry
than just don't want
the top of other trash.
I will also say that
if there's individual things...
This is post-pickup.
If there's individual things
at the bottom of the trash can,
there's a very high chance
that those get left behind.
Let me say this as well.
If you're listening, and I don't think you are,
because I've seen you.
I think I know who you are.
Let me let you know, next time you reach into that trash can
or get anywhere near it,
you might have a little something waiting for you in there.
Like what?
That's all I'm going to say.
Damn.
Wow.
We need a Nest Cam on Dave's thing.
Y'all are sensitive. Put the haters Dave's thing Y'all are sensitive Put the haters out there
Y'all are sensitive
The only thing sensitive is the
What I'm gonna put inside this trash can
What are you gonna put in there?
Don't get too close
What the fuck
That's all I'm saying
What are you gonna put in there?
Just saying
Be careful
Dylan are you steaming on anything?
I am
So
I think it was yesterday
There was an article about chris brown
and he there's something like a rape allegation or something right so we're we're steaming steaming
right i'm steaming there's a he has a rape allegation he was arrested and somewhere in
he was detained in paris in paris thank you petty um it's unnecessary i don't even know if it's true
what happened or not i don't. Maybe he didn't rape anybody.
But I just said,
I quote tweeted the article on Twitter
and I said,
this guy sucks.
Okay?
Yeah.
Because you know what?
The guy sucks.
Even if he didn't rape anybody
this time around,
the guy sucks.
He still sucks.
He's a woman beater.
He's just a trash,
overall trash human being.
For whatever reason,
this dude has so many
ride or die fans
that come to his defense.
I said he sucks, and people were coming at me for it.
I think you said he sucks.
I said, this guy sucks.
And it went micro-viral.
Like what?
Let's take a look.
It went micro-vi.
Did it?
I'm going to take a look at that.
Pull it up, Dave.
Pull it up.
The part that I'm steaming on Is why are people spending their free time
On the internet
Defending this trash bag of a human being
It's everybody
I mean it's every big celebrity
Ariana Grande
But there are very few celebrities
That have done things he's done
That the public knows about
That gets a pass from so many people
True, Ariana has not
To my knowledge Be beaten anybody or raped anybody.
She hasn't done anything terrible.
50 RTs for Dylan, 587 likes.
That's beyond micro vibe.
No, it's not.
And it's really not.
A lot of people say that I have a problem with him being black and rich,
which is so fucking stupid.
It's so fucking stupid.
I mean, Dylan, let me just ask you right now.
Let's set the record straight.
Do you have an issue with Chris Brown being a rich black man?
No, but what I do have an issue with is him beating women and allegedly raping women.
That's the part I'm not cool with.
I'm glad we set it straight.
Okay, I missed all this.
Have you ever had any other fan bases go after you on Twitter?
Have I what?
Have you ever had any other fan bases go after you on Twitter? Have I what? Have you ever had any other fan bases go after you on Twitter?
I usually don't address stuff like this, but I just wanted to say he sucks.
So, no.
After I went...
I got quote tweeted a bunch, Dave, so those aren't going to show up on the mentions.
I went out to whoever responded with the Conor McGregor, who the fuck is that guy?
You know who Chris Brown is, dude.
Yeah.
Come on.
Yeah.
He's just an absolute pile of human garbage is what he is.
When I question...
And people are writing for him still.
I don't get it.
And his music sucks.
No, it doesn't.
Yeah, it does.
His music is terrible.
It's terrible.
No, it's not bad.
Get it.
He can dance.
He can dance.
Yeah, he can dance.
He can dance if you want to.
You know, he was supposed to fight Soulja Boy in a celebrity boxing match.
He would have beat the shit out of Soulja Boy.
Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Drake? Will would be a better match for Soulja Boy in a celebrity boxing match. He would have beat the shit out of Soulja Boy. Yeah, I agree.
Yeah.
Drake?
Will would be a better match
for Soulja Boy, probably.
Ooh, I don't know about that.
He's a little dude, I think.
Yeah, I think I could
take Soulja Boy.
Chris Brown's not a big dude,
but he's...
Dude, Soulja might find you.
He might actually agree to it,
so be careful.
I had Avril Lavigne's fans
go after me really hard.
Oh, because you were talking about how she has a fake doppelganger
who assumed her role?
She died.
Yeah.
Well, we were talking about this yesterday.
I was at a party with a bunch of Ariana Grande fans,
and they were pressing me like,
you're not a huge fan of hers, why not?
And I said, look, it's not that I don't like her.
I will say this, though.
Meet Me in the Middle is a great song I think it's probably
one of her best but
you know what song is really good
that's old that she's on that I forgot about
which one? Bang Bang
is that Ricky Martin? No
that's She Bangs
Bang Bang I was going through some old
tweets the other day of mine on an old
account that I had that's now private
and one of my tweets on it what it was my pre pre grand x account and then i switched over to a different
account okay and uh i saw it's i said quote bang bang is a once in a generation song and i stand
by that is that really her whose song is that i don't even know she's on it with other people
you'd recognize it. I promise.
Meet Me in the Middle still goes.
It slaps.
There was something else I'm steaming on, but the time has passed.
It's no longer that relevant, so I'm going to skip over it.
Was it a Fyre Fest day? It was about football and how penalties are not reviewable
or non-penalties are not reviewable.
And I don't understand why at this point that they're not.
I haven't heard a good argument against it.
Because we're still talking about the NFL and that's what they want.
Ooh, wow.
Yeah, about how the NFL fucked up.
Are you steaming?
Not really. I'm kind of chilled today.
Life's just cool with you right now?
Yeah, I do have an issue with West Elm.
Okay.
Sally ordered a print recently that I really just don't like.
And she did it without, you know, really, you know, talking to me about it and coming
to an agreement about it. And, you know, this print would exist above our bed. So I have to
see it every single day. I don't love it. It took forever for them to ship. Finally got it in the
mail, came in damaged. So we had to go through the process of, you know, sending it back.
When, if something comes damaged, just let us throw it away.
Or keep it, and just send a new one.
But, instead, we had to sit on the phone with the customer service person,
and by we, I mean Sally did.
But I had to sit there listening to the annoying music that they make you listen to for like 45 minutes.
And when I say 45 minutes, I'm not overstating it. it 45 minutes on hold they can't issue a refund for it until we
get it again it's like dude just don't send us this ugly fucking print so finally they give us
a refund and then we get an email and it's like your print will be arriving in like two to three
months and i was like god damn it i don't want this print anymore two like months i have to wait months for this ugly fucking thing they just don't make it easy
no just like and doing a print is probably one of the easiest things that a company like west
elm could possibly do it's not like they're constructing a couch they're literally just
printing a picture that they have on a computer somewhere in a high-res file and
framing it and sending it out.
What if their computer guy is Dylan and he's back there just hunting packages?
He's like, guys, I'm going as fast as I can.
It wouldn't take me two months, Dave.
I'll tell you that.
But it's just like, dude, you're a big company.
You're owned by Williams-Sonoma.
Figure it out.
Just figure it out.
Damn.
You're steaming.
Come on.
Come on.
West Elm, dude.
Just be better.
It's not hard.
Man, Will went from, I might not be steaming on anything to like full steam.
He's steaming more than we are.
I'm partially just mad because I just hate the print.
We need to open the door.
What is the print?
We need to open the door to some of the steam out, man.
It's a longhorn?
Yeah.
Oh.
I just feel like if you walk into any like Texas sorority girl's like apartment, like
that she's got it in there.
Dylan, you've probably seen this print a hundred times like i just feel like everyone i feel like everyone in austin has this print and
i just don't want the same thing as everybody else i don't think that's too much to ask
wow you really put your uh girlfriend on blast here she knows that i hate it when i i actually
celebrated when it came in damaged i don't know why i'm still getting roasted i was so happy when
it came in damaged and then little did i know that it had way more implications than I thought.
I can't wait to do your starter kit.
Because I'm thinking of what an appropriate print for Will would be.
What is it?
No, I'm just thinking of like just some like over the top artsy thing.
When's the next starter kit? Is it going to be on Wednesday? I think we'll do Wednesdays for the-top artsy thing. When's the next Starter Kit?
Is it going to be on Wednesday?
I think we'll do Wednesdays for the next couple weeks.
Who's going to be next?
Who wants to be next?
Give me.
Let's go at that boy.
You want Dave?
We'll get Dave next week.
Next Wednesday, we'll do Dave's Starter Kit.
Hey, just to be clear, we haven't left the steam room yet.
Do you want to talk about Phil Mickelson real quick while we're in here?
I know you're not steaming on him.
You want to just talk, small talk?
Yeah, I want you to confront what you wanted to confront yesterday.
Should we get out of the steam room, though?
No, I think it's appropriate we stay in here.
It actually might be appropriate because it kind of ties in.
So Phil's on a tear.
He's back.
He's 48 years old.
I think he finished second or third last week in the desert.
He posted a gram.
He's all in on social media now.
This is something that's happened within the last year.
Posted a gram yesterday.
Unsolicited.
I don't know who was asking for this content, but he gave it to us.
It says...
He got like one DM and jumped on it.
In addition...
Okay, this is just...
Describe the photo.
It's a red light therapy bed
it looks like a fucking tanning bed it does and it would be the least surprising thing in the
world if phil mickelson like had a subscription at like a tanning place here's here's the caption in addition to a steam shower massage and jacuzzi regime regime regimen regimen he's
he took he put regime wow what an idiot his intern's about to get fired i'm also using my
light bed beamer bed hypervolt and normatic leg sleeves to help me recover prepping for phoenix
with a good week of workouts practice nutrition and recovery to have me ready. Prepping for Phoenix with a good week of workouts, practice, nutrition, and recovery
to have me ready to pick up
where I left off last weekend.
Takes a little more work
and effort for me to play my best,
but I plan on, quote,
bringing it, end quote,
this year, exclamation.
So he just wants everybody to know
he's in the lab cooking something up.
And I have to say...
Was that Hashtag Spawn?
No. Are you sure? He doesn't tag any of the companies. And I have to say... Was that Hashtag Spawn? No.
Are you sure?
He doesn't tag any of the companies on it.
Wow, this could be the end of him.
If he did, he didn't do Hashtag Ad,
and he's going to go down like Fyre Fest.
So you slide through.
It's a slideshow.
You've got the light bed.
You have what looks like...
I don't know.
Some of his equipment looks like...
Let me see.
...what Drago was using in Rocky to test his punch power. I don't know. Some of his equipment looks like what Drago was using in Rocky
to test his punch power.
I don't know what this is.
And then you've got the Normatic leg sleeves.
He's essentially doing like $50,000
worth of recovery every day.
Those leg sleeves go hard.
Have you used them?
Yes.
I love them.
They feel so weird.
I consider myself to be kind of a nerd
when it comes to this stuff
there's a podcast i listen to i don't know if you guys know who it is joe rogan he has a podcast he
likes to talk about recovery with some of his guests he's a big recovery guy some of this
shit i've never heard of so i had to look it up like the um okay i've heard of people using
light therapy it's supposed to like stimulate the blood flow helps you. This is something I would use now if I had access.
I don't have the money for it, though.
I'd try anything to recover.
100%.
But the Beamer bed, are you familiar with this?
It's essentially just for blood circulation.
He's living in 2040, and we're living in 2019.
He's in an episode of Black Mirror.
The Hypervolt massage thing.
You've probably seen trainers at the gym.
It's just a little thing you jab into somebody and it kind of pops in on them.
They look pretty tight.
Massages out your muscles.
I want to try that.
You can buy one.
They're only like $350.
Oh, that's it?
Yeah.
We should probably do it.
Let's buy it with the business expense account.
Is it Vibrate?
Yeah.
No, it pulsates.
I'm going to have to be the guy from Wolf of Wall Street that tells you guys you have to chill out with your business cards.
That has to come in and be like, guys, stop buying this recovery stuff.
I've never paid much attention to recovery.
Recovery's key.
It shows.
Especially when you're 48.
It shows.
Which Dylan?
Well, when I'm there in 20 years know you might want to look into this how do you recover
off your infamous san marcos dirty six weekends the trifecta uh it's you know it's it's been a
good 15 years since i've done one of those so i'm not really sure you were doing it at 31 stop
there are people out there who legit think i'm in my 40s and it's because of
you assholes so wait hang on he's he's using the steam shower then getting a massage and then
getting in a jacuzzi that's how he recovers after a massage jacuzzi yeah no one's doing that that's
the executive workout in a way it really is that's a professional executive that's a professional executive workout. Dude, that's a CEO workout. Yeah. God damn.
No one's doing that, Dave.
No one's doing that.
So you get out of the steam room.
Then someone's right there and they're going to massage you for an hour.
Yeah.
Then after that, you're going to go sit in the jacuzzi.
Imagine having the expendable income to have a massage whenever you want it.
This is 50K worth of recovery a day. That's the dream, Dave.
God damn.
Massage is on demand.
Come on.
Do you think he shaves
during this period of his
recovery?
His face? While he's getting a massage?
Yeah, he gets out of the steam shower.
That's the best time to shave when it's steamy.
It opens your pores.
If he did, do you think he'd be using Harry's razors?
If not, then he's just an idiot.
You just completely...
You hit us with that sidewinder.
Did not expect this. Harry's founders were tired of paying a bunch for like razors that were overpriced and over designed they did something they don't need that like all these other companies
they're just doing too much they knew that a great shave doesn't come from gimmicks like vibrating
heads flex balls or handles that look like spaceships. Get your spaceship handles and get out of here.
Scram.
They've got the nice ergonomic shape to it.
It has a great weight to it, which isn't talked about enough.
It just feels good in your hand.
These are just tactics that leading brands have used to raise prices for years.
But luckily for us, Harry's has fixed that.
They've combined a simple, clean with quality durable break durable blades durable
fair price they're the best that's all you can ask for they bought a world-class blade factory
in germany that's been making quality blades for 95 yes 95 years wow did not know that part
you can get cartridges replacement cartridges for just two bucks each they get rid of up charges
and they are about half the price of the other ones it's crazy uh they also have 100 quality
guarantee not 99 100 huge you literally can't ask for more than that if you don't love your
shave just let them know and they'll give you a full refund right now through our podcast for our listeners you can get a $13 value trial
set that comes with everything you need for a close comfortable shave it includes a weighted
ergonomic handle a five blade razor with lubricating strip and trimmer blade rich lathering
shave gel a travel blade cover and you can get this by redeeming your trial set at harrys.com
slash circling back. Again, that's harrys.com slash circling back. Make sure you go there
to redeem your offer and let them know that we sent you to help support the show.
Beautiful. Feed the fam. Help us out. Man, I can't get over the fact that Phil's recovering
like that. He's recovering like that
he's gonna be the most recovered person in 2019 he's gotten to the point where it's not even
recovering anymore it's just like can you over recover we may never know like he gets to the
first tee and like he's playing partners like to recovered yeah like his playing partners like
hey good to see you you look overly recovered like what's yeah i don't think that's a thing like you look too good right now yeah uh go bang out a set of burpees or
something i think we'd be remiss right now not to talk about uh the bachelor real quick let's hit it
real quick we have to dylan we could have done this in the steam room dylan steamed oh thank you
dave can we turn the steam back on i can can't believe... Dude, I already showered.
I can't believe...
We're not turning the steam back on.
That's wasteful.
Our best friend Colton, who we love.
Yeah, the best friend.
He sent Bree home.
He's like the fourth member of this podcast.
Looking scorching hot.
I don't know how he went into that rose ceremony
and didn't give her a rose just based on how she looked.
How do you not call him audible when you see her in that red dress with her
hairs up?
She looked incredible.
You get to the line,
you check out the defense,
you throw out an Omaha kill,
kill,
kill.
Yeah.
And then you give her the fucking rose.
I'm a big updo guy,
Dave.
I think you know that about me.
I think everyone knows that about me.
Love a good updo.
Nah.
Hair up.
I'm good.
Oh,
I just,
I can see the jaw and the neckline and all that shit.
It's hot.
Anyway. Chill, dude. I know. I'm sorry. Dylan can't stand up right now. I'm getting a Oh, I can see the jaw and the neckline and all that shit. It's hot. Anyway.
Chill, dude.
I know.
I'm sorry.
Dylan can't stand up right now.
I'm getting a little out of control.
Bree.
How is he going to send Bree home?
To be fair, I feel like you didn't even talk to her.
I'm not sure if this was the editor.
She didn't get the airtime.
The editing.
She didn't get any airtime, and it didn't look like they had any connection, but he
still kept around some people where I was like, really?
Her?
Exactly.
Her?
Yeah. I'm not going to name names, but there's some people. There's some people out i was like really her exactly her yeah i'm
not gonna name names but there's some people there's some people out there's some spares
i'll name some names uh is tracy is that her name okay i don't even know who tracy is but tracy uh
soldier boy voice like you were saying oh tracy tracy i don't get it i don't get it she's she's
she's she's nothing.
There were people he called who I didn't even know existed.
He had to leave her on to fight with Demi.
And of course we know the Miss Alabama Hannah was a producer pick.
He doesn't want her there, but she's got to stay full.
No, I don't know if it was a producer pick.
That's going to be the two-on-one.
No, 100%.
Not this next episode, but the one after, two-on-one.
Right, two-on-one.
I'll say this, though.
I don't know who to believe.
Between Bama Hannah.
Oh, I do.
And the other girl.
Caitlyn?
Caitlyn.
Is that her name?
I thought her name was Caitlyn, and I was like, I kind of like this girl.
There is a Caitlyn.
Then I saw how they spelled her name, C-A-E-L-Y-N-N.
Who was the other cute girl that got sent home before Brie?
I don't know.
Like on the one-on-one date.
Oh, yeah.
I forgot her name.
I thought she was cute. She was cute. I thought she should have stuck around yeah but she brought it she had
you know my theory i respected it he was just like this this might apply to brie but we didn't
really see them interacting that much when a girl who's as attractive as that uh goes home
i just have to assume she's got a bad breath fair that's That's not fair? It's not fair.
But why else would he send her home?
He didn't have a connection, Dave.
You know what?
You're two weeks in, bro.
My friend Travis,
you know Travis, I think.
Downerable.
Yeah.
He likes to play this game called She's Perfect But.
Okay.
And it's like,
would you marry this girl
who's perfect in every single way?
Like she's your dream girl,
but,
and then there's like
something really terrible quality about her.
Mm-hmm. Would bad breath be a deal breaker for you? Yes. She just had like halitosis in every single way. Like she's your dream girl, but, and then there's like something really terrible quality about her.
Would bad breath be a deal breaker for you?
She's had like halitosis
all the time.
Yes.
She's perfect
in every single way.
I recently had some,
you know,
verbal contact
with somebody
that had bad breath.
I will not say more than that
because I don't want
to expose anybody.
And it ruined,
it ruined about
an hour of my life.
I was just like, this sucks.
You can't get past it.
No.
You can't date someone with bad breath.
Come on.
Halitosis.
Get rid of it.
Can we talk about the Bamahana-Cailyn drama real quick?
Yeah, we just were.
Let's get back into it.
I don't think that there's enough evidence out on the table to say definitively one way or
the other i think that people want to believe kaylin because she's much more in control of
the emotions that she's displaying but at the same time she doesn't necessarily have a better case
than bamahana but she bamahana has done weird shit yes yeah it's based on i'm just getting
looney tunes vibes she doesn't have the credibility because of how she acts.
The whole like roaring thing or whatever she was doing.
She's not doing herself any favors with that.
What are you doing?
I don't know.
It's so early in the game to start trying to throw other people under the bus.
Was she the one who during the fitness date, they got up to joust her and she was just waxing chicks?
Yeah, that's her.
What were they?
First of all, did they set that up they're like hey just stand here and let her just whack the fuck out i
think so those girls didn't even fight back they just got up and they just they just ran into a
buzzsaw yeah it doesn't make sense is she a stout girl i can't tell like what is she just athletic
no i don't think so what okay she's got she's got that fake-ass smile just plastered on her face all the time.
She's just nuts, man.
Yeah, she's nuts.
That's why I'm team Kalen, obviously.
I don't know if I have a horse in that race.
I don't know if I want one.
If you recall, I was wanting Colton to throw Hannah off of that ship when they were having dinner that night.
Yeah.
You wanted him to drown her.
She would have swam to shore.
I don't know.
Maybe.
We don't know.
I assume she can swim.
You don't know what the tide's like.
Let's talk about our good friend Demi.
She's still got all the star power of the show.
She's the most electric personality of the season.
I can't get enough.
The faces she makes. Did you see her face during the rose
ceremony when some like random chick got a rose she was just like what yeah what you she caught
that follow last night she's great i follow brie and i follow demi did you see where she people
were accusing her or pointing out that she kind of looks like tommy lorraine yeah which i don't
i don't think that's fair she wasn wasn't having it. She was not happy.
Her bio says,
you can't spell dime without Demi.
Kind of love it.
Chill.
Is she team follow back?
Dude, you probably actually crossed paths with her.
She went to T-State like last two years.
Do we know if she was in a sorority?
I think she was.
She's a bobcat?
I did some deep creep on her Instagram one day just to get a better feel for what she was up to.
And I think she was in a sorority.
I have a confession to make.
What?
You slid into her DMs?
No, no, no.
Not yet.
My confession is that I know who wins.
It was spoiled.
I know.
I didn't ask for it.
Yeah, I don't care.
Don't talk to me. I have to let the let the people know that will and she was a zeta
really which makes sense yeah i guess i don't know what that means well you do okay you guys
can't see it but dylan's like is that part of your trifecta i don't know what that means either
yeah so it was spoiled for me and the person who spoiled it is dead to me right now yeah
i i honestly don't even want you to bring it up because I don't want it to be a thing.
I don't want it to be a thing that you know.
I have to be honest.
I have to be transparent about that.
You really did.
I would have rather not known.
You brought it up numerous times.
Like, I don't want to know.
It ruins the show.
This is the first I'm bringing it up on the show.
The people needed to know that.
Just chill.
I was like, don't you know I do a podcast?
We talk about this shit.
I can't know this.
No.
It's fucked up.
People that know spoilers are scumbags and I don't you know I do a podcast? We talk about this shit. I can't know this. No, it's just people that know spoilers are scumbags,
and I don't respect it.
Is there anything else from this episode?
Like, honestly, there hasn't really been much yet besides...
The workout day, flipping tires.
Yeah.
So, shouts to the girl who went home, Tracy?
Tracy's still there.
Tracy stuck around.
Okay, no.
There was one girl who was in the
final three who
looks like she's gotten
plastic surgery on her face.
Did she go home? That's Tracy, I think.
No, no, no. He's talking about the blonde with the
lips. She brought the dog. She went home.
She went home. She put out some fight
though. She's apparently
she said she's been doing Taekwondo competitively
for a long time. I was very impressed with her fight impressed i watched her hit the heavy bag and i actually was surprised
that she sent her home because she actually in the beginning in the first like episode i was like oh
this girl's crazy she's bringing her dog she's being weird but then the more i saw her i was
like oh she's very normal just saying i thought she i thought she did herself right because she
did come out of the gates hot and and you're like, oh, God.
Yeah.
But she ended up being pretty normal.
How many DMs do you think Brie has gotten since getting sent home?
A thousand.
No, I mean thousands.
2,000?
2,500?
Crazy.
Damn.
Where's she from?
She lives in L.A.
Oh, God. She's a model.
She's been a model for a long time.
For a minute.
You should hit her up.
See if she's coming down for South by.
I should.
Yeah.
South by is coming up, dog.
I know.
Damn.
We threw a good party last year.
Are we throwing one this year?
We don't know.
Too early to say.
We don't know.
Too early to say.
We're doing Saved by the Lunch, aren't we?
All I'm saying is just pencil in your calendar.
Yeah.
Just pencil it in.
Don't pen it in.
Pencil.
Light pencil.
Make sure it's a pencil with an eraser.
Don't press super hard.
And also, if you didn't book your hotel about six months ago, don't pencil it in.
Oh, yeah.
You're fooked.
You're going to stay at House Rough.
No.
Sleep next to Randy.
Casa del Dave?
Yeah.
Randy's not sleeping with strangers.
De Vito.
They're not strangers.
They're backers.
Yeah.
I don't have anything else in The Bachelor.
Honestly, it wasn't a gripping episode.
I don't think we...
The drama that we have so far isn't enough to make me want to do more.
You got shirt off Colton.
You've been requesting that.
He looked like a fucking snack.
They gave us the pool.
Very snacky.
They gave us the gratuitous pool party.
He's just a thick boy, man.
Okay, actually, I'm not done.
These pool parties, how awkward are they?
If you're Colton, like, I think on the surface, you have to be really cool to be Colton.
You have a bunch of good looking girls at a pool fawning all over you.
But all eyes are on you the entire fucking time,
and you just know that there's vultures out there
just waiting for you to step away from the pool so they can attack.
It just makes me uncomfortable.
It's a meat market.
Plus, you know, he's in a swimsuit.
He's got to be careful.
He called that pool party to see what they're working with,
you know what I'm saying, before the cuts.
Well, I feel like Chris called the pool party.
Yeah, Chris. That was a Chris audible. This chris audible chris damn he cancels the
cocktail party and hits him with the colton's the quarterback chris is the offensive coordinator
he's calling the plays yeah he's like no we're doing a pool party today
yeah just just be at the pool party.
Demi has a belly button piercing.
Still?
Yeah.
Like to this day?
That's the one negative on her.
No offense to those out there who have them.
They're just not for your boy.
Oh, man.
You hear that sound?
It's the sound of a thousand ladies ripping out their belly button piercings.
Oh, God.
Well, Dylan, maybe you shouldn't have been so hard on them.
Yeah.
I wasn't hard.
I don't tell women how to dress or how to look.
I'm not telling anybody how to do anything.
I'm just saying they're not for me. Hey, how should they express themselves?
Dylan, go ahead and tell us.
However they want.
How about that?
Should we wrap this up?
We should.
All right.
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baby it's a no brain yeah we're familiar yeah that song came on too late to be a song of the summer, but it still slaps.
I didn't like it the first time I saw it.
Now I listen to it like every day.
It's crazy that you can have Chance and Quavo on a song,
and somehow Bieber's got the best verse so far.
It's not even close.
All right, we'll see you guys Friday.
Fun stuff.
If you're not on board yet, we'll see you Monday.
Just let us know what we need to do to earn your business yeah love you bye