Circling Back - Woolly Mammoths, Met Galas, and Norm
Episode Date: September 15, 2021We open today’s episode with some fun and easy banter, some fond memories of Norm MacDonald, discuss the possible return of Woolly Mammoth’s, break down some Met Gala fits, spend two minutes on Ba...chelor in Paradise, and This Weekend in Fun. Support us on Patreon and receive weekly episodes for as low $5 per month: www.patreon.com/circlingbackpodcast Watch all of our full episodes on YouTube: www.youtube.com/washedmedia Shop Washed Merch: www.washedmedia.shop (0:00) Fun & Easy Banter (18:08) Norm (30:25) Woolly Mammoth’s Returning (44:24) Met Gala Breakdown (1:00:43) Two Minutes in Paradise (1:03:23) This Weekend in Fun Support This Episode’s Sponsors Earlybird CBD: www.earlybirdcbd.com (STEAM for 20% off) Vizzy: www.vizzyhardseltzer.com/washed Liquid IV: www.liquidiv.com (CIRCLINGBACK for 25% off) Grammarly: www.grammary.com/steam (free sign-up!) --- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/circling-back/message Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Transcript
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All right, we're back.
Circling Back Podcast presented by Busy Heart Seltzer,
the only heart seltzer with vitamin C and superfruit acerola.
My name's Will DeFreeze. On the left side of me,
David Carter Ruff.
Hey, my girl is
banging. She's so low maintenance.
Don't need no champagne pop
and entertainment. Take her to
Wendy's. Can't keep her off me.
She want to dip me like them fries
in her frosty. Will.
I didn't know you were starting with bars today.
Well, I've been scribbling some stuff down.
Is that a Sam Hunt song?
No, it's his brother Mike.
What is that from, really?
Apple Bees on a date night.
Walker Hayes.
That song is annoyingly catchy. Walker Hayes sounds like a weed strain. Walker Hayes. That song is annoyingly catchy.
Walker Hayes sounds like a weed strain.
And equally terrible.
Oh, did you try that Walker Hayes?
One of my biggest issues with the song is this particular verse.
Don't need no Tesla to impress her.
My girl is happy rolling on a Vespa.
You don't have a Vespa.
Yeah, and you could make a case that Vespas are a little more hoity-toity than Teslas at this point.
If I saw a dude riding down a backcountry dirt road on a Vespa, I'd be like, what are you doing?
I'd be like, this dude's kind of sick, though.
Get a dirt bike, though.
The dudes that they're targeting with this song, they don't know what a Vespa is.
And if they do, they kick them over when they're walking through a parking lot.
And they also probably make fun of Tesla guys, too.
They roll coal on Teslas.
They're F-250 boys.
You can't roll coal with a fucking Tesla.
You certainly cannot.
What if they had a roll, like, hey, Tesla, roll coal, and it just started smoking out the back?
That'd be sick.
Roll coal button?
You didn't have to do anything.
That'd be kind of sick.
You know you can tell Teslas to see their butthole when it opens the charging port?
Oh, my God.
Are you making this up?
I learned this the other day.
Are you making this up?
Okay, I saw it on a TikTok the other day.
Why would that be programmed?
Wait, because they have a lot of weird program hack things.
I know they do, but that would be a very strange one.
What did you say?
The Tesla just busts it wide open yeah it says if you ask tesla to show you its butthole it'll open its charging
port thing if you're a tesla owner and you say open butthole your car will open up its charging
port and you can say close butthole and it will close it there you go that's from tesla master
what i'm not saying that.
Why does Applebee's get so much shit?
Because it's not Chili's?
Like, is that why?
I can honestly tell you I've never eaten at Applebee's, so I can't speak to its food.
Never.
I feel like Applebee's are way spread thin in Texas. I always grew up being a Chili's guy.
Can I just bring to your attention this cuck shit?
My new clean blue jeans without the holes in them.
Country kisses on my lips without skull in them.
Okay, dude.
Too good for skull?
Why does he have girls falling all over him at Wendy's?
Wendy's is not a club vibe.
I don't know why you would have girls just
grabbing onto you. Wendy's was low-key
a hangout spot for us back in high school.
Really? Oh yeah, low-key.
We were Taco Bell parking lot, but it was just geographic.
It was parking lot.
It was centrally located.
Did y'all ever do the combination Pizza Hut
and Taco Bell? No.
There's no way
that we were ever doing that because the strip
malls that our fast food restaurants
were in were just not in a place where you'd want to hang out
with the boys.
We were kind of Walmart people for a little bit, though.
Just go raise hell in Walmart for a bit.
In Walmart or in the parking lot?
Both. We were just parking lot dudes.
Sometimes we'd just be bored at like midnight and it's like, let's go to Walmart.
It's open 24-7. Let's go fuck shit up.
Did you know that Walker Hayes did a version of this song with Kesha?
Yes.
Yeah, unfortunately, I do know that because when I was hungover after the
Brett's two-year anniversary dinner, I was sitting in the studio trying to edit
Sunday Scaries and just get my work done for the week so I didn't have to think anymore.
And Randy turned his speakers on his computer up to 11 and decided to just blast both versions numerous times.
And it got to the point where I was like, dude, Randy, please just turn this off.
Please.
What is Randy doing?
The thing is, Randy actually likes this stuff.
But I like the fact that Randy likes this stuff.
It makes me happy that Randy enjoys it.
Randy's so Midwest, it hurts.
I wish someone would say that about me.
But you're not. I'm on my cuck shit now, though. You're someone would say that about me. But you're not.
I'm on my cuck shit now, though.
You're too far north in Michigan.
No, I'm not.
But you're not far enough to be UP.
Dude, come on.
You're in the sweet spot of non-Midwester.
Dude, I'm Pogue-like.
Non-outdoorsy.
Dude, I'm a Harbor Springs Pogue.
Am I finna cop these Saquonzo?
I don't think you are.
Everyone's wondering if I'm gonna cop.
What color are they?
There's several colors.
Don't ask me.
Got him!
Is this going to be like when you got Yeezys and wore them twice?
Yeezums?
Why don't you wear your Yeezys very often?
I didn't get...
Someone got me Yeezums.
Yeah, but why didn't you wear them?
Because I got them in my mid-30s.
I don't know.
Maybe I will wear them again.
Will wore his.
Yeah.
Yeah, but we're riding different waves.
I still have...
What's that mean?
I have one pair of mine still.
Will can get away with wearing edgy, cool shit.
I can't.
I'm wearing all-sponsored clothing right now.
I'm wearing a Robax sweatshirt.
You can get back or 20, 20% off.
I'm also wearing a pair of 10,000 shorts.
I almost wore my Rothy's in today.
Are you trying to say Will's fancy like, oh?
I'm fancy like 10,000 shorts.
I really don't enjoy that ad.
I'm going to come through in these Saquons.
With your new iPhone after just absolutely flaming all the dudes
that are trying to cover the Apple event for their job.
Dude, I love the app.
I clicked that thinking you were going at some blue checkmark,
some known quantity.
That guy just had like 40 followers and his name was Harry.
I feel kind of bad.
He's got a tiny following and he had made a tweet that went.
It didn't even go that viral.
How did you see it?
Because I clicked on the trending topic, Apple event.
You were just looking for a fight.
No, I wasn't.
I was looking at the new iPhone.
Dylan came through swinging.
I was looking for the new iPhone.
And you just wronged Harry, our boy.
Dylan was the dude in the tracksuit. It brings out the biggest unfunny dorks on the internet.
They all think they're so funny.
Oh, this one's got the camera.
They moved the lenses a little bit.
Why do you ride so hard for the iPhone?
They're doing just fine.
What do you mean?
I'm making fun of the dorks who make these dumb jokes.
But you're riding hard.
You're a ride or die for
apple uh no i do i do enjoy their products yes dude have you ever tried to say the word apple
while holding your time yeah dude it's crazy apple dude dylan you're the dude in the track
suit showing up to court and all the cameras are flashing and you're just looking around just
looking for somebody to say the wrong thing you're going into the Apple store just looking for a dude that likes Apple way too much.
If you click on that trending tab on Twitter, it's just a thousand people making the – it's like the guy wearing a flannel shirt holding up a brand new identical flannel shirt that he got for Christmas.
Being like, oh, look what I just got.
And it's like, okay, we get it.
The phone's not that different.
But for people like me who are upgrading like three generations of iPhone, it's actually meaningful. Does it have like a
doodoo byte in it? How much
mega storage is in it? A doodoo byte.
Yeah, it's just...
The biggest one has
a TB, terabyte.
No one needs a terabyte worth of memory on their phone.
If you're someone out there and you've maxed out
your 512 gig iPhone, I want you to send
me a screenshot of what you're maxing it out with
because I'm very interested.
What are you doing?
If it's anything but downloaded podcasts
or circling back,
you need to delete everything.
All I need is the Bourbon Street steak
with the Oreo shake.
That's fair.
That's fair.
I've always wondered
how often people go to like burger joints
or any joint really.
Not those kind.
And get a burger, fries, and just polish it off with a shake.
Because I never have room for the shake.
Even if they're shakes, they're known for their shakes.
I'm not getting the shake.
I don't have room for that.
Sometimes you just got to go off, though.
This is a hungover order for me.
I will only get a shake if I'm violently hungover and I just want a shake.
Should I apologize to Harry?
No.
Yes.
Yeah, I think you need to publicly apologize to Harry.
Here's his tweet, though.
Do the Conor McGregor response.
Here's his tweet, though.
Confirmed, all caps.
The new iPhone 13 will be able to make and receive both phone calls
and text messages!
Exclamation point.
Oh, dude.
Let him enjoy his virality.
I'll be honest.
To be fair, Harry's kind of wrong here.
They actually send iMessages and not text messages.
They can send text messages, but I think the functionality
more people will be interested in is the blue text.
Sadly, his tweet's
doing numbers.
Because you put him on. Yeah, you quote tweeted him.
You put him on the big stage. No, it's because he hashtagged at Apple events
so everyone sees that dumb shit.
Yeah, but you have a bigger following than all the dorks that were
liking his tweet in the first place.
Dorks just enabling that sense of humor.
Just tell me.
I'm sorry.
Hey, Apple, instead of releasing a new fucking iPhone, just make it so we can, I don't know,
mark Texas on red.
This is a good tweet.
Not that hard to figure out.
Why can't we do that, man?
Take me to your Apple event.
Is that what it says?
I couldn't read it.
It says, look similar?
Question mark? Damn. Are they it. It says, look similar? Question mark?
Damn.
Are they thinking the new iPhone's an alien?
Whoa, dude.
And then there's the guy who Photoshop's on like 16 camera lenses.
Like, oh, here's the new.
I got the new iPhone 20.
It's already out.
It's like, okay.
That should be our bet payoff.
You have to do every Apple event for the next five years.
You have to live tweet it.
You have to let us choose your tweets that you
hashtag with Apple event.
Okay, so I
discovered something last night, and it
was that I said to Sally, I was like, yeah, we
got a really funny submission for a fantasy football
punishment, and it's that the loser of the
league has to go get a yellow belt
in karate.
And she started laughing, and then
she told me that her entire family used to do
what's the word
for it? It's Korean
karate. There's a word for it.
No, it's something else.
And now I have
received photo and video evidence of
her entire family wearing like the full
suit and stuff like that. I absolutely
love it. Was it Tang Soo Doo?
No, let me just find it real quick.
Buy me some time.
I wish it was like Muay Thai.
I know it's not Muay Thai,
but that would be fun if the whole family's in the Thai fighting.
Not Krama Gai, is it?
Hapkido.
It's a hybrid Korean martial art
in the form of self-defense that employs joint locks
grappling throwing techniques kicks punches and other striking attacks i did that in high school
locked joints damn got those joints on lockdown smoking weed swag only though that's what i heard
we had like i was in high school i was probably smoking pencil shavings why couldn't you get that
chronic because i was 15 and I worked at UPS.
It actually paid pretty well.
I believe it.
It did.
For a high school kid.
Did you have one of the brown outfits?
No, I was loading trucks.
You let each wear what you want.
I wore a cut-sleeve shirt showing off my very beautifully tiny arms.
Damn, Zaddy.
Out here throwing boxes around.
Let me tell you this.
If you ever wonder... Chill wonder chill you ever want to
know why your package is broken never because some idiot like me was loading the truck yeah
some kid who weighed 140 pounds was trying to who does not care who does not oiled up
oiled up biceps out there just slinging slinging packages yeah you were oiling your biceps up
before going to the UPS warehouse.
Yeah, you know, I had to earn their respect.
I learned two new things today.
I learned that Dylan has a deep, deep hatred for Apple events
and that Dave worked at UPS.
No, I love Apple events.
He just hates the critics.
I just get tired of the dorks who think they're funny
with the same jokes they've been making for the past eight years.
They always play.
The same jokes, they can just reuse them.
Let's get some programming notes out of the way.
First and foremost, head over to Patreon.
Right now we're doing Worst Of.
You can still email worstof at watchmedia.com with your story
or head over to Watch Media and send your story through the Worst Of site.
Or we can completely transition to spooky season.
Bless you, David.
Spooky season is upon us.
We will be starting it the last
week of September.
If you have any
spooky stories, anything ghoulish,
anything cryptic... Let me say
something. If you don't upgrade for
spooky season, you're just an idiot. Well, that's not
what I was going to say. I'm here to
say people are idiots for not... Thank you for the kind
words, Dylan. Damn, do we get
Satan in here? No. Wow. My throat is very sore. Lucifer, don't let it on my arm. Email
your stories to spooky at washedmedia.com. That's spooky at washedmedia.com. So yeah,
if you have any spooky stories out there, maybe anything paranormal. You know what I
need to do? Decorate the stew. I need to decorate the stew. Absolutely can't wait to decorate
the new stew. Shorty spooky like, ooh.
We should cut out some ghosts and hang them, you know, and do some fun shit.
Maybe just chill.
We got something.
Chill, B.
What do we have?
And you know what?
When I'm done with this studio, you're not going to want to step foot in it.
Are you going to decorate it?
We have some stuff here already, but it's just the same stuff we used last what part of it's
going to be spooky like oh don't you understand because it seems like you're having a fundamental
issue with my communication spooky like you oh spooky like
some people really like the the demon voice other people are just repulsed by it. I like it.
I can see Alyssa not liking it.
I like a wolf howling at the moon.
That's a good spooky sound.
I'm more of an aye.
Are you the grandpa from Johnny Tsunami?
I'm on the Chattahoochee.
Aye, bono.
I just.
Chattahoochee.
I was thinking of a chainsaw firing up,
and maybe it brought me immediately back to a movie I watched last night,
which I'll talk to you about in a little bit.
Dirty work.
Wait, what?
Yeah.
I know.
So head over to patreon.com slash circlingbackpodcast.
Like we said, spooky season is upon us.
If you're waiting for spooky season, just go upgrade now
so you can get some Worst Of content in your life
and just see what that's all about as well.
What are you waiting for?
Just do it. just do it worst up worst of to spooky is the best
the best one two punching content out there you're right you're right that's like luca to tim
hardaway jr damn i would say more like tim hardaway jr to luca dude that's like bruno to cristiano
oh wait bruno's on that team? Bruno.
Do they let him bring his bike out?
He rides his bike
around the field
in celebration.
I thought it was stationary.
They put wheels on it
for the showmanship.
Go follow Circling Backpot
and Watch Media as well.
Leave a review,
five-star rating,
tell a friend about the podcast,
and you can watch
all of our episodes
at youtube.com
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Hit mash that subscribe button for the Randman one time.
Also, today's episode is presented by a very, very close sponsor of ours, Early Bird CBD.
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Last night before I went to bed, I walked up over to our pantry where I keep our early bird CBD,
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Dude, it's crazy.
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It's about Christmas colors, David.
Correct.
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I'm getting a little bit over my skis here, but these would make a great stocking stuffer.
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You're not wrong.
It's only September, but I'm glad you're thinking in terms of Christmas.
I don't want them to sell out or something because these are flying off the shelves.
We do want them to sell out.
Fancy like, oh.
You know what I mean, though.
These guys were one of the original advertisers on Circling Back,
so you know they're near and dear to us.
They gave us our first ever, I think first ever physical dollar that we made.
Yeah, cash.
They paid in cash.
So Dylan was like, no, it's not reported.
Yeah.
Oh, I didn't do that.
Dylan was like, let's pocket that shit.
Come on, man.
Come on.
Luckily, we paid taxes on that.
I think we used that cash to open our bank account.
Yeah.
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We have a bank account.
Not to brag.
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We do have money.
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And that's that.
Some unfortunate news came across at TL yesterday to the point where I thought it was actually fake.
And unfortunately, a person that's been near and dear to all of us, and I will say Dave is probably the one who enlightened me to Norm MacDonald more than I already was, but he passed away yesterday.
It's Dave's guy.
Yeah.
So yesterday afternoon, I was actually with my dog, Randy, my actual dog,
and we were coming back up to the office and got in, looked down at my phone.
I was getting blown up, a lot of texts and i was like uh-oh and like
the the wide uh the range of people texting me made me like really like oh what happened
and opened it saw the story um wasn't completely i i was, like, I hadn't heard –
Norm's been keeping a low profile for a while, and so I was pretty shocked.
I don't know.
I knew something – I had this feeling something was up a while ago,
and I know it's, like, Monday morning quarterbacking, but I didn't know what.
And Norm – nobody really knew, I guess, except for his immediate family,
that it was cancer.
I believe I heard leukemia, potentially.
But, yeah, yesterday was a tough day.
Made a lot better by just Twitter was fun yesterday with Norm clips.
There's so many, and we'll kind of get to his entire catalog.
But, like, just go type in Norm into Twitter, and, like, you will see.
Shout out to everybody who took the time to rip the YouTube videos
and just put them on Twitter instead of just posting the link
and not making me open YouTube.
Yeah, I'm not trying to click through.
No, and I was guilty of that too.
But, yeah, man, it was pretty wild.
And, like you said, yeah, Norm yeah norm was probably i mean he was my
favorite comedian is my favorite stand-up comedian of all time favorite weekend update anchor i mean
my wheelhouse of snl was early 90s to the late 90s early 2000s um you know i stuck with it a
little bit after they fired him for making uh one too many oj and mich Jackson jokes. Shout out Don Ulmeier.
Fucking scumbag.
But yeah, that was my formative years,
and I can remember watching SNL with my dad and my sister and just cracking up at Norm.
I was a big Dennis Miller fan.
His work on Update.
I liked Kevin Nealon, but Norm just had such a unique style that...
I don't know. I kind of,
I kind of, um, I probably modeled a lot of myself after his, uh, sense of style, his sense of humor,
um, as evidenced by like how many people text me like, Oh yeah, you're the first person I thought
of. And I was like, Oh, I think, I think you were the first person in a lot of people's minds.
Yeah. My first exposure to Norm MacDonald was when I went on spring break in seventh grade
and we had one of the guys
that we were on spring break with,
one of the other kids,
he had downloaded some of the Celebrity Jeopardy stuff
onto his like,
maybe he even just burned a CD.
Like a mini disc?
And so I had Turd Ferguson at my fingertips
for the entire spring break
and I don't think I've ever laughed harder at that point in my life than I did listening to the first ever time I heard Turd Ferguson at my fingertips for the entire spring break, and I don't think I've ever laughed harder at that point in my life than I did
listening to the first ever time I heard Turd Ferguson.
And then from that point on, like, I liked Norm.
I mean, we've talked about Dirty Work recently numerous times,
and I was a big fan of that.
I think I underrated him for a long time,
and I think it actually took me meeting you, Dave,
to understand that he wasn't just a funny guy from SNL,
or he wasn't just this guy on Twitter that just puts out takes.
Live tweets golf tournament?
He's great.
And, yeah, it took you entering my life in order for me to understand what Norm MacDonald actually was.
And I don't know.
It was a somber day yesterday
because i mean not only was it just too soon it was just like shocking but it i mean i think pete
blackburn was the first person on my timeline that was like you know this is sad but this is
this has been a great timeline day for for watching old clips and just smiling about it
yeah when i think of norm i think of his delivery. Just an all-time, just dry, perfect delivery,
which separates really funny people from not-so-funny people.
His was just very unique and just perfect.
And we talked about dirty work in here very recently
and how I'd never seen it, and Dave got up and walked off set
because he was so appalled.
So I watched it last night to honor Norm.
And, man, it was hilarious.
I laughed out loud probably three or four different times in the movie,
which is pretty rare for me.
I was surprised you hadn't seen it because there's a ton of things.
I went back and watched just some clips of it last night.
And I was like, oh, dude, this is stuff that Dylan would find absurd.
It's so stupid funny.
Chris Farley has one of the most insane cameos.
The people in that movie, I wasn't ready for.
Yeah, Chris Farley's in it.
His brother's in it.
Yeah, his brother's in it.
Adam Sandler's in it.
Of course, Artie Lang is his co-star.
Artie Lang's fit in the first 20 minutes of the movie.
Like a skin-tight, um i don't know what material
that is like polo shirt with loose fitting uh corduroy pants like just so like late 90s trash
uh don rickles the uh who is who's a great character that the scene of when they when
he lines up the movie theater employees and he's just berating arty it's so good like so
unnecessary it's just and uh just the norm is like oh what do you think it's funny he's just berating arty it's so good like so unnecessary it's just and uh
just the norm he's like oh what do you think it's funny he's like what do you laugh at he's like
oh just the part where you're talking into his belly
yeah so like that's funny they brought the all the dead we don't need to go over every scene
i mean it's like they brought the dead fish into that house you know they're
planning it all around there's just like a gruesome crime scene
that unfolds like in the next room.
Yeah, that movie is like,
it's just like a volume shooting
of every Norm bit from the 90s.
Note to self,
which that was a big player for us in high school.
Note to self.
Yeah, yeah.
Maybe we'll bring that back.
Oh, and of course, Shooter McGavin.
Shooter McGavin.
I forgot his name.
Something McDonald.
Isn't it Rory? He's Shooter McGavin. Weer McGavin. Forgot his name. Something McDonald. Isn't it Rory?
He's Shooter McGavin.
We don't need to give him an actual name.
Well, yeah, it's funny, man, because I can't get past the Chris Farley cameos.
It was so fucking fun.
The street fight, the bar fight scene is so stupid.
Did you read the article that I retweeted yesterday?
No.
From New Yorker.
He wrote an article for New Yorker.
I don't know when he wrote this.
Norm did?
Yeah, and it was about what he called the greatest show of his life.
When he went to a prison and did a show for about six to seven people in a giant auditorium.
people in a giant auditorium and it was a prison for people that were insane that had gotten uh that had pled or that had gotten off of their crimes because they pled insanity okay and so
like only a few people showed up to the show and but just his you could reading the entire column
in his voice and the way that he wrote it was i was reading it and I was just like, man, like this guy is the reason that he's so good is his delivery.
And just reading him and reading his writing.
It's not just his delivery, like he is just a smart, witty and very aware person of how funny he is.
And it's just great.
I don't know.
I underrated him for so long. Yeah, and I think this will expose a whole new generation to his comedy.
And it's probably not for everybody.
It's definitely not.
And that's kind of what makes it great.
But, yeah, after SNL, he had The Norm Show for a few seasons.
And then, you know, Norm was like a somewhat early adopter of the podcast he had the youtube
show which was a you know the norm podcast or whatever that i was a huge fan of um go back
and watch some of the highlights of that like i'm telling you you it will be worth your time he he's
a great interviewer um and like he has it's interesting to take i want to go back and watch
some of it knowing that he's been fighting cancer for 10 years because –
and some of these, you know, he comes in looking a little bit rough
and, like, his energy levels are pretty low.
And you're like, man, is Norm okay?
The one with Larry King is absurd.
The Tom Green one's great.
Adam Egott, his sidekick on the show, is, like, the perfect sidekick.
Adam Egott now runs, I think, Rogan's Comedy Club in Austin.
Anyway, check that out.
And then one of my favorite things that no one really watched, I guess,
was on Comedy Central, and it was the sports show with Norm MacDonald,
where it was essentially Weekend Update with all the relevant sports headlines.
And it was just teed up for Norman.
It was so good.
All that stuff's available on YouTube, as are most of his weekend update monologues.
The OJ jokes are definitely on there, the ones that eventually got him fired from the show.
But, yeah, it was a tough day, you know.
It was like I think somebody told me, like, man,
you said on an old episode that that one would hit you really hard.
And I was like, man, I guess I did.
I think we did a segment of, like,
what celebrity deaths would hit us the hardest on Touching Base at one point.
Was it Touching Base?
And I think two of the people that were named during that have now passed.
It was Arnold Palmer was definitely one and Norm MacDonald.
Yeah.
Thank you to everybody who reached out to me to make sure I was okay.
I was like, yeah, I'm okay.
Dylan and I sent the same text at the exact same time.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know, it sucks, but, you know, I'll be –
here's a little preview of my weekend in fun.
I'll be doing a lot of YouTubing, a lot of Norm YouTubing.
I think Dirty Works.
I'm going to go watch Dirty Works.
Dirty Works in the mix for me this weekend.
There's no choice but to sit down and watch some Dirty Work this weekend.
One of my favorite Norm small appearances in Billy Madison, Dirty work's in the mix for me this weekend. There's no choice but to sit down and watch some dirty work this weekend.
One of my favorite Norm small appearances in Billy Madison,
which is one of my favorite comedies of all time.
They're sitting there, and they're watching the news.
They're watching TV, and they get the principal. The principal, it's like he's about to expose Billy,
Like, he's about to expose Billy, and they're like,
10, the heir to the hotel fortune accused of fraud or whatever,
and, like, it's clearly him.
It's very obviously Billy.
They're all looking at it shocked, and he just goes, now, now, maybe it's somebody else.
Now, now.
Yeah, his comedic timing is impeccable.
And his stand-up, go back and watch it,
the stuff he did beginning of the pandemic was really funny.
And, you know, he was a great guest on Conan,
great guest on Letterman.
That's the kind of line that's so normal
that you wouldn't be surprised if it's just ad-libbed,
you know, in the scene.
Yeah, I bet there was a lot of that going on back then. That's the kind of line that's so norm that you wouldn't be surprised if it's just ad-libbed in the scene. Yeah.
I bet there was a lot of that going on back then.
I think his influence is larger than I could ever understand
in terms of this podcast, and I think that is heavily due to Dave.
And I don't know if the podcast would be what it is,
gotten off its feet without some norm influence in the game.
Dude, he followed circcling Back on Twitter.
Yep, yep.
I don't know why.
I don't either.
I had interacted with him once.
I had tweeted him a couple times, and he responded once.
I posted it yesterday about the Mavs.
But I don't know how he found Circling Back.
I don't know if he listened.
I remember kind of having that thought was like, oh man,
do I want him to listen?
Like,
I'm afraid like it's kind of the don't meet your heroes thing.
Like I would be so upset if I found out he listened.
It was like,
oh,
this sucks.
This is terrible.
But you know,
it was,
that was kind of cool still.
Yeah.
He never really interacted with us on a circling back,
but he was at least aware of that.
There was a thing called circling back podcast,
which was cool.
Love that.
Is it time to talk about woolly mammoths?
Hard pivot.
Hard pivot.
Yeah.
There's no good transition.
Yeah, so this woolly mammoth thing was in the news.
I think it's been in the news for a few years now
because there were talks of bringing the woolly mammoth back
for environmental reasons,
and now there's actual funding for it. So I think we're going to see woolly mammoth back for environmental reasons. And now there's actual funding for it.
So I think we're going to see woolly mammoths at some point.
Using recovered DNA to genetically resurrect an extinct species,
the central idea behind Jurassic Park films,
may be moving closer to reality with the creation this week of a new company
that aims to bring back woolly mammoths thousands of years after the last
giants disappeared from the Arctic tundra.
Flush, with a $15 million infusion of funding,
Harvard University genetics professor George Church,
known for his pioneering work in genome sequencing and gene splicing,
hopes the company can usher in an era where mammoths walk the Arctic tundra again.
Let's fucking ride.
I love this kind of shit so i'm all for bringing back uh many
animals so here's a question and this has nothing i mean this has somewhat to do with this if we're
just bringing back woolly mammoths why are we not using this same technology to bring back endangered
species that are valuable to the ecosystem now um Oh. Oh, fuck no.
You think we know?
I think this will be like a first step in like an experiment to do what you just said.
Okay.
Should we be doing the first step?
Should the experiment be with a giant, a woolly mammoth?
Yeah.
Say we did it with like a bird or something.
Like are we –
Cricket.
Like an – and, you know, something tiny.
What did woolly mammoths eat?
I think they eat grass.
I think that's part of the thing with the tundra.
They eat, they're worried about it melting.
Mammoths once scraped away layers of snow so cold that air could reach the soil and maintain the permafrost.
After they disappeared, the accumulated snow, with its insulating properties, meant the permafrost began to warm,
releasing greenhouse gases, according to scientists.
So a TLDR for that would be accumulation, no freezing.
They argue that returning mammoths,
or at least hybrids that would fill the same ecological niche,
however you want to say that word,
could reverse that trend. A lot of people say niche, and I want to say that word. It depends on if you're with Dan or Jester.
It could reverse that trend.
A lot of people say niche, and I didn't know that until I met Dan.
You said to me one time after Dan said niche in a meeting,
you approached me after, and you were like,
is that pronounced like that?
I have said niche.
This is crazy.
Fancy as fuck.
This is cool.
Okay, when's this happening?
I need this to happen soon.
Hard to say?
I don't know, Dave.
Is it sad that whenever I Google a science question,
it always comes up from National Geographic kids?
I'm not actually asking questions that have merit.
I just get the kids' answers.
I feel like it's a good question.
Do scientists have the ability to bring back any species of animal,
as long as they have, of course,
they have to recover some kind of DNA from it? If they can up back a woolly mammoth from 10 000 years ago i don't
see any reason why we can't bring back like a recently extinct yeah animal or comedian
can they clone rosie so i never had to go without rosie like the rhinos like there's yes you can do
that that is a thing now people actually do that that. It's like $30,000.
And I get why someone would do it.
Not for me.
Although it's like a genetic copy.
They're not like the exact same dog.
Yeah.
Can I ask a question about dogs and death real quick?
If you want to bring it down, yeah, sure.
Okay.
Do you all think you're going to get another dog before your current dog dies?
Yeah.
Because I don't think there's a scenario where I don't do that. I don't think I can go one night without a dog in my house at this point. And I think I have to get another dog before your current dog dies yeah because i i don't think there's a scenario where i don't do that i don't think i can go one night without a dog in my house at this point and
i think i have to get another dog this has been the tfm of the week segment it's a callback uh
yeah no yeah i've thought about that just because as you notice that a lot of dogs when they get
like older older senior and you bring a puppy around them or like dogs, when they get older, older, senior,
and you bring a puppy around them or a younger dog,
they get a little bit more pep in their step.
Bay and I have talked about getting another golden.
We will get another Springer Spaniel, but I think we'll get a different color.
I think if we had the same coloration, I'd feel weird about it after Rosie passed.
We're going to get a traditionally colored golden.
Okay.
Golden one.
So you get the cream and the golden?
Yeah.
I like the red ones, but she's not into those as much.
Oh, I like the red ones a lot.
Cool.
I've often said that the only thing missing from our household is red golden retriever hair to complement Randy's white hair that sheds everywhere.
Can you imagine?
Oh, I told my –
People have multiple golden –
We had dinner with my dad last night, and I was like,
oh, yeah, we're going to get another dog.
And he was like –
Dog.
You're getting rid of Stella?
Like, no, we're going to have two dogs.
Yeah, we're rehoming.
We're not replacing them.
That's old school.
That's it.
Yeah.
Like, no.
But, yeah, well, I mean, yeah.
We would honestly, if –
Depending on what we do with a potential kid,
numero dos, maybe we'll get a puppy.
You have some news?
No, I'm just, you know, if we decide to.
I don't know if we have room in our current house to have a puppy and a baby.
Just get bunk beds, dog.
Question. That's a great point.
Who gets top bunk?
The dog. I don't know how easily
how easily it is to recover how easy it is to recover dino dna we've all seen the movie i get
it but tree sap could we actually do this with dinosaurs and just maybe just do one and like a
nice herbivore just to study just to study it and see what's going on there i it's as we learned from
the movie dylan i think it's a slippery slope it's all right these people have too much power
show me a stegosaurus like so if these harvard pegasus if these harvard nerds decide to resurrect
these woolly mammoths where are they going to be doing this like where would these woolly mammoths
be farmed because they would they have to to let them grow and they have to study them before they
just release them to the wild right so where's the woolly mammoth farm going to be because i have to let them grow and they have to study them before they just release them to the wild.
So where's the woolly mammoth farm going to be?
Because I want to go see that.
Think about how much numbers
like an Instagram account
where it's like,
this dog raised this woolly mammoth as its own.
And it's just like the dog with the puppy
or the baby woolly mammoth.
What do you call a baby woolly mammoth?
A woolly small. It's not mammoth anymore okay so they're actually it's actually a highly small
this is actually a hybrid animal that's part elephant okay it's called a mammophant that's
fine I don't like that I'll take a hybrid So they're going to splice bits of DNA recovered from the frozen mammoth specimens into that of an Asian elephant, the mammoth's closest living relative.
Duh.
The resulting animal, known as a mammophant, will look and presumably behave much like a woolly mammoth.
How do we know how they behaved?
We don't know that.
Yeah, we have no clue.
Yeah, this thing could come out like doing the worm.
Be like, well, this is what they were doing. you think the woolly mammoth is gonna be you don't
know that after 10 000 years the first thing the woolly mammoth population is gonna do is the worm
well there's no way of knowing it's true no you're right you're right is there gonna be like videos
of like this watch this woolly mammoth reunite with the guy that created him from harvard and
then like the woolly mammoth runs up and like stomps him out. It just puts a tusk through
his torso and just kills him. Let's make one
brachiosaurus. I don't know what that is.
You know way more about dinosaurs than I do. That's the tallest
one. The big
boys. It's not the biggest. Why would we make the
tallest one? That could get out of
control quick. For the specimen
of it.
I would
take Parks wherever that thing is in the world just to see it.
This says that the most docile and gentle dinosaur is a brachiosaurus.
How do we know that?
I have so many questions about how we know certain things about dinosaurs.
What if we think that and we bring it back and it's just a complete asshole?
Yeah.
What if it just sucks?
This thing cannot be reasoned with.
Yeah, it's a plant.
It cannot be managed.
You know?
I no longer have a manager.
Like he just like, he like eats the last slice of pizza.
He like leaves the gate open.
You don't eat pizza.
Fucking brachiosaurus.
Real dick.
You probably wouldn't eat pizza.
Yeah, they would 100% eat pizza.
It's bad.
You don't think he's going to eat it?
If you put pizza in front of a cow, is he going to eat it?
Yeah. It's pizza, dude. Let's do that with a Detroit eat it? If you put pizza in front of a cow, is it going to eat it? Yeah.
It's pizza, dude.
Let's do that with a Detroit-style pizza.
Have you ever seen one person turn down pizza?
It's not a person.
That's the thing.
Have you ever seen anything turn down pizza?
I've never seen someone hold pizza up in front of a cow, though.
I want to try to give Randy pizza, my dog, not you.
He would like it, Dave.
Rosie will literally eat anything.
She does not care.
She's fancy like, ooh.
If you took her to Applebee's,
she would be getting that Oreo shake immediately.
Chocolate, right?
You should eat that.
Yeah, I don't think dogs are supposed to have dairy or chocolate.
Just bring back a dinosaur, man.
Everyone wants to see it.
I'm in.
I like woolly mammoths, too.
I've gained a huge appreciation for dinosaurs having my son as my son. I'm currently at a crossroads because I'm in. I like woolly mammoths, too. I've gained a huge appreciation for dinosaurs having my son as my son.
I'm currently at a crossroads because I'm like,
should I have Fritz go directly into the dinosaur world
when he can start understanding this stuff?
It's a fun world.
But then I was thinking,
should I just have him go straight into the current animal kingdom
so we can go out and see these things and not have to kick ourselves?
You mean because his favorite animal wouldn't be an extinct one?
Correct.
Okay.
Correct.
We're going to bring the Brachiosaurus back and find out he's the dude who's always late with his rent check.
He never chips in on groceries and stuff.
Just a shitty roommate.
God damn it.
Put the wrong guy back.
It's not the heaviest dinosaur, though, which I learned recently. What's the heaviest dinosaur though which i learned recently what's the heaviest dinosaur
the argentinosaurus it looked they looked similar i thought it was the chubbosaurus
that's what they used to call you in prison right yeah i did three and a half on a look it up will
yeah how big is it actually from my research actually says the Ligmasaurus is actually bigger.
Really?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
I've never heard of that one.
That's crazy.
The Deez Rex is also larger.
We knew a guy named Deez Rex.
Deez Rex?
Yeah, the Deez stood for Dumpasaurus.
It was mean.
It was a mean nickname.
Did he have a big ass?
I think he took it on.
I think he listens to the show. It was in my shirt. Dude his name d-saurus d-rex you know i i knew
him for a long time i've known him for a long time i've i worked with him after college i did not
know the d stood for dumpasaurus you did i just thought d-rex and it didn't make sense because his initials were not D. Dumpasaurus.
Dumpasaurus.
He was a thick boy.
Thotasaurus.
Can we talk about Grammarly?
I was waiting.
I've been champing at the bit.
There's some people out there that are heading back to school.
You've probably got to spend a lot of time writing.
But with Grammarly's digital writing assistant,
you don't have to spend a lot of time editing,
and that's a beautiful thing.
Grammarly, if you're not familiar, saves you time on your assignments so you can spend more time making memories.
They also provide advanced suggestions for clarity and tone improvement
so you can finish your classwork faster than ever.
Grammarly is an all-in-one writing tool that improves your productivity
and saves you time when you have multiple assignments to complete.
I felt like kind of a cheater when I was at Grand X
because the first thing I did when I started at Grand X
when I was editing columns was just download Grammarly.
And I have to say, it expedited my job a lot.
It made editing a lot easier for me.
Meanwhile, I thought you were just super good at grammar and smart.
It also taught me a lot about grammar because I learned through my mistakes and I learned through other people's mistakes.
Wow.
You learned a valuable lesson.
I also – I get their emails now because I am a premium subscriber.
And apparently my tone in emails lately has been a little, not negative, but a little stern.
A little aggressive, huh?
So I'm going to start mixing in some more exclamation points to make sure that everyone knows that I'm having a good time.
You've kind of been a jerk lately in emails.
It's wild what an exclamation point can do to a sentence, man.
Oh, it's crazy.
There's some people that you, like not to y'all, but I would never do an exclamation
in an email to y'all,
but like to like our accountants
or something or people
who like don't really know
my personality.
I'll hit them with one.
You feel like a jerk not doing it.
You would be disgusted
by how many exclamation points
I use without.
Have a great weekend, period.
No.
Have a great weekend.
Have a great weekend.
We just informed a lot of people
of like our wedding plans
and some people were having to respond.
What?
Like, hey, I can't make it because whatever.
I'm like, thanks for letting us know.
And if you don't put an exclamation at the end of that,
it sounds like you're just really put out by them not attending.
Hey, thanks for letting us know.
Thanks for letting us know.
Yeah, thanks for letting us know.
But it was like, thanks for letting us know.
Yeah.
It's like, oh, he's cool with it.
Well, as we've explained, Grammarly, it improves your writing,
and it's an easy way to do it.
Grammarly works like a virtual proofreader with intelligent suggestions to improve anything you write,
from 1,000-word essays to 100-character tweets.
Beyond fixing spelling and grammar, they also offer those clarity and tone suggestions that I just mentioned.
It's a free AI-powered writing assistant, and you're safe from embarrassing spelling, grammar, and punctuation mistakes.
Grammarly will even give you a heads- up if your writing is unclear, wordy,
or strikes the wrong tone.
With Grammarly's browser extension, you can
write faster and more effectively across
the web, whether using Chrome, Safari, Firefox,
or Microsoft Edge.
Grammarly even works in Google
Docs. Shouts to Google Docs. I was having some
issues earlier today, but not because of Grammarly.
It's because, like, why do you
copy? Whenever I copy and paste stuff, it just doesn't...
You're asking me?
Yeah. Sorry. I cannot copy and paste.
Trying to
get my document
to PDF.
You don't have to make this a punk song.
And when you upgrade to Grammarly
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slash steam. That's
g-r-a-m-m-a-r-l-y
dot com slash
steam. Very cool.
We had a major event.
Big social media event that went down.
Ooh, can I guess what it was?
Yeah. Was it Truck Month?
It wasn't Truck Month. Was it the Apple event?
Wasn't the Apple event. All the dorks
swarming with their jokes?
It was the Met Gala, and I was kind of
surprised that they had the Met Gala the same nights
that the Mets were actually playing.
The Mets can't even show up
if there's a gala elsewhere
and they have to be at whatever their stadium is.
Remember we had lunch at Galatoire's?
Yeah.
Dude, we should have had fit pics going off into Galatoire's.
We should have gotten a paparazzi photographer.
We got a fit pic off. We did. What was his name
that got us that FitPic?
Desmond? Something sick. I don't know.
I think we followed
him. We credit
him. We definitely tagged him. We could go find it.
How do y'all feel about the Met Gala in general?
Do you know what it's for?
There is a charitable aspect
to it, right? I couldn't tell you.
I don't even know what they do when they get inside the gala.
Is it just like mixing and mixing it up and having cocktail hour?
Do they have speakers?
There's a dinner.
What do they have for dinner?
Is it fancy like Applebee's?
They do the Bourbon Street Steak.
Did you guys have a steak on Bourbon Street?
Did I miss that whole memo?
Is Bourbon Street known for their steaks? I didn't have any steak. Why is that a thing at Applebee's? I didn't have any steak on Bourbon Street? Did I miss that whole memo? Is Bourbon Street known for their steaks? I didn't have
any steak. Why is that a thing at Applebee's?
I didn't have any steak. I'm not opposed to it, but I'm just asking.
I'm just asking the question. What is it called?
A Bourbon Street steak? Correct.
I don't know then.
What do they do inside the Met Gala?
They just talk about their money and their outfits.
What goes on? $35,000
a ticket, huh? Really?
You have to buy a ticket to go to this shit?
Someone posted a picture of the meals they were served.
I don't know if it's real or not.
It's very expensive.
You don't just get invited to it?
No.
Some people get invited.
It's a charitable thing, I think.
So all of these celebrities pay.
They don't get in free and just like they're not just there for, you know, have A-listers
get photographed?
They don't all pay.
They don't.
Someone's like sponsored, covered, and I don't know.
You know, I was actually invited and I was there about to go in.
But when I saw that AOC had the dress that I was going to wear on,
I was just so embarrassed that I had to leave.
Okay.
You guys ready for this?
Please.
The Met Gala, formerly called the Costume Institute Gala
or the Costume Institute Benefit.
Met Gala is a better name.
And also known as the Met Ball.
It's an annual fundraising gala for the benefit of the
Metropolitan Museum of Art's Costume Institute in New York City.
It marks the opening of the Costume Institute's annual fashion exhibit.
This is a lot of stuff just for a museum to have a fashion exhibit.
Man, I was thinking this was like World Hunger or homelessness or childhood cancer.
No, it's the fashion exhibit of the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
Keep naming causes.
I'm just thinking this is a letdown.
I didn't know exhibit had a yearly thing that needed to get opened at the Met.
Dude, he just pimps everyone's ride while they're
inside that's part of it that's part that's what you included in the 35 000 ticket you get dressed
you get dressed in the theme of what you want your ride pimped as oh there are more deserving uh you
know philanthropical i mean yeah i i you're right, but I always hate that when someone—
No, it's fine. It's fine.
Like you donate to this particular cause.
Oh, I guess this other 10,000—
You're right.
I know what you're saying.
It's not super fair.
But no, I mean, the arts are a big deal, I guess.
I don't know.
Maybe they have an issue with being defunded up there.
I don't know.
Look, this will shock you guys.
I don't know a lot about this scene.
Where is the Met Gala held?
New York City?
Probably at the museum, if I had to guess.
Nicki Minaj was not in attendance because she is not vaccinated,
and they required a vaccination as well well as a negative uh pcr test
i believe vaccination no entry correct and she did not get she's not vaccinated because her cousin
in trinidad got vaccinated i'll have that go and it made his balls get really big i'm sorry
no her cousin's friend oh her cousin's friend wait a minute i like that can i pull back the
curtain here can i pull down the pants here One of us had some discomfort in that spot.
We talked about it.
My balls was hurt.
That's true.
They didn't swell, though, did they?
I heard from other people who listened to the episode when I talked about it
that their balls also hurt after getting vaxxed.
Which I remembered.
Did not swell, though.
Some people on Twitter were saying, oh, this is not a thing.
And I'm like, my buddy's balls got pain.
I mean, just saying.
I would get vaccinated and then get giant balls and then dressed as Sam Cassell for the Met Gala.
Do you guys think I could pull off a Sam Cassell costume?
No, I don't.
I sure hope not.
We have some costumes that I've sent to Randy to put on the screen.
Randy, do you want to toss some of these up here so we can discuss some of these?
If you're just listening, you can watch on YouTube and see exactly what we're seeing on the screens, just to be clear.
We have a noted artist, singer, dancer, wife of Russell Wilson, Ciara, who went as Russell Wilson.
I believe she's also wearing a Super Bowl ring.
I don't like this.
I like the fact that she wore the Super Bowl ring,
but I don't like that she's simping so hard for her husband,
who I don't really like that much.
She looks great.
She's very beautiful to me.
I mean, don't get me wrong.
Don't get me wrong.
I love to see her one-two step, personally.
Sierra is all-time.
She is.
That's a great song
She's scorching
Shouts to Russ
I just
Wanna know
I don't like the idea
Like what if
What if Alyssa went to the
To the Met Gala
And decided to dress as like you
She put on like a fake mustache
And a podcasting uniform
What does that
What would that look like
Joggers and
And something that we had
Sent to us from a sponsor
Blogger scrubs.
A rowback polo.
She's in a rowback polo, some joggers from public rec,
and then she has a microphone attached to her ear.
I would be fine with that.
I would be like, where did you find the $35,000?
Yeah, that'd be a good question.
Did I miss something?
Did we get some money back?
Who else do we have, Randall?
We have a collage of sorts.
Billie Eilish I thought actually crushed this because I had no clue it was Billie Eilish,
and I was psyched when I realized it was her.
I had no clue that was.
Did you see Hailee Steinfeld?
Yeah.
What?
She was unrecognizable.
Who was that?
I mixed up who Hailee Steinfeld is with Hailee Bieber, and so I said yes, even though I have
no fucking clue who you're talking about. Hailee Steinfeld is with Hailee Bieber. And so I said yes, even though I have no fucking clue who you're talking about.
Hailee Steinfeld is a very pretty actress.
She was in...
Was she on Steinfeld?
She was in True Grit.
She was a love interest of Jerry one season.
Come on.
She was in True Grit.
She was younger.
She grew up.
As they often do.
She looked like a bombshell.
Then we also had Aesop Rocky who decided to wear his grandma's blanket.
Aesop?
Whatever.
Aesop?
Aesop.
I'm from one of the better ACL shows that I really didn't have any –
I wasn't looking – I was just like, okay, I'll check it out.
I was indifferent.
It was good.
He's got a heater out right now.
Does he?
Hold on.
I feel like I need to get more into him.
Hold on.
He's hot. He's pretty. Dylan's looking for this heater from two years ago. He's very handsome. Is he now. Does he? Hold on. I feel like I need to get more into him. Hold on. He's hot.
He's pretty.
No one's looking for this heater from two years ago.
He's very handsome.
Is he pretty flaco?
Very handsome man.
His heater is called every day.
One word every day.
Thank you.
As in the adjective.
A lot of people use it as a noun, and they shouldn't.
Okay.
We don't care.
You can use anything as a noun if you really want to.
I don't know what Haley Steinfeld looks like,
so someone who's looking at what she wore right now, don't even.
Well, she looks nothing like she looks in that picture.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Huh?
Look.
Who's this turd on the right?
Timothee Chalamet?
Timothee?
Oh, Chalamet on the God.
I was not a fan of his fit.
He pretty much wore sweatpants with, I don't know, a white tux jacket.
I don't get it.
I do stan Timothy though.
I stan Jimothy. Have y'all
been bumping that Jimothy? I have not been bumping that
Jimothy.
ASAP did take off his blanket
and he unveiled a pretty clean looking
tux look.
And that Rihanna. They were the last ones to show up
which I think is a major flex.
Yeah.
I think they were burning in the limo.
So tell me this.
Burning, not concerning.
So Nicki Minaj, she said she has to do some more research on her own before she gets vaccinated.
Yeah.
Hasn't there...
I don't think you've seen enough research.
I would like to see...
There's a lot of...
I want to see her...
This has been out for a while.
I want to see her Google history after...
She hasn't done her own research.
I need some peer-reviewed papers.
Her YouTubing and Facebooking is going to...
She's busy.
Maybe she hasn't been able to keep up on stuff, man.
She's out here putting out hits.
I am not a Nikki stan, but I do stan her Twitter persona
because she will go at anybody.
Meghan McCain, who is the one we were looking at this morning?
Joy Reid.
I mean, she'll go.
But the way she does it, she doesn't do it in like a –
she's not afraid to tell somebody to like eat shit or something.
Literally.
Yeah.
I might start doing that to all the A-list celebrities that tweet at me.
Yeah, I kind of love it.
I love unhinged people.
I love unhinged celebs on Twitter.
Hey, Meghan McCain.
You stink.
Oh, wow.
Sorry.
Should we delete that?
That was a little unhinged.
You're crazy.
But that's what we like about you because you're not afraid to go there.
Do we have a couple more photos, Randy?
Let's go to the next one.
Okay.
Kim Kardashian went as a ghost.
I respect what she did.
You know, looks more like a dementor to me.
Okay.
Okay.
Why do you say that's a ghost?
Well, I don't know.
Because when she stands in front of something, you can't really see what she's doing.
I kind of loved what she did, and I don't really know why.
It's just weird.
I like the fact that the unintentional comedy of her standing next to Kendall and her just being like a blank spot in front of a wall and Kendall looking like incredible.
It's just hilarious to me.
I'm going to go with just for spooky season.
She was the only celeb masked up.
True.
No, there was other ones.
Sierra was masked up.
Benefit kissed each other with masks on.
They did?
It's hard to say that.
You know they're living in Austin right now.
I do know that.
Do you know where they're living?
No. I got some that. Do you know where they're living? No.
I got some rumblings.
Downtown.
Yeah, there's talk of them being at the Austin Proper Hotel downtown.
That's where their residence is.
Interesting.
Oh, that's unconfirmed.
That's unconfirmed.
I haven't noticed them.
Maybe we can catch them at La Pesina.
You're trying to get fajitas off with Bennifer.
That sounds great.
Among celeb couples,
that is probably the most unapproachable couple.
I have...
Affleck and J-Lo.
I don't even care to see them in Austin
because there's...
It's Bennifer.
They're not going to be cool.
No, but I would...
This is a little bit age.
Hit me with that bonk.
I want to see J-Lo in person.
You think he walks around with um rocked up those those iced duncan coffees wherever like everywhere he
goes why is every photo of him he just looks completely beaten down he's depressed david
he's depressed no he's doing a bit but like he leans into it right he's carrying like seven
giant iced coffees wherever he goes when he's photographed in public. Why can't he?
I mean, he has Ben Affleck money.
He could just have someone get the coffee for him. Exactly.
Very fair.
I mean, I know he's like a regular guy, just a classic Boston guy.
Just like you and me.
Hey.
Freaking J-Lo, man.
Fucking, she's a rocket ship.
She's a smoke show.
Fucking to the moon.
Have you seen, how old is she?
Oh my God.
She aged like a can of Fostas.
How you like them apple-botted jeans with the boots with the fur?
Fucking give me a Sam Adams.
Fucking smoking.
We've lost the Northeast contingent.
Yeah, they hate us.
Yeah, they're all done.
They hate us.
I'll take ownership of it.
Do we have one last fit, Randy?
Oh, Lil Nas.
Oh.
He came through with three different outfits on one runway, and I fucking love it.
He's also showcasing that cake.
Oh, he is quite cakey.
Is that a mentor?
I'm not sure, but I think he posted a photo of his middle one, which he looks like he's in a suit of armor.
And I think there's an anime character that's like that, and he probably is one of the first people to ever dress as an anime character.
He looks kind of like that fella on Star Wars.
Hard to say.
C3PO?
C3PO.
Okay, maybe. Not the short squadron one. That's R2-. Hard to say. C-3PO? C-3PO. Okay, maybe.
Not the short squadron one.
That's R2-D2.
Yeah.
Did he just question us on C-3PO versus R2-D2?
What are you doing?
Dude, you are such not a nerd.
Oh, man.
Well, this is cool.
I hope to one day be in the 1%.
Should we buy tickets next year?
Should we crowdfund tickets next year and we just show up chunking deuces?
Horse is in the back.
He's also got the cake in the back.
You know what I'm saying?
He does.
If we got tickets for this, are we allowed to walk in on the red carpet?
This could be big for us.
I think anybody who has the $35,000 gets the red carpet treatment.
We can put a little bit of money away each month,
save up, and get one of us in.
I'll nominate Will.
I don't want to go.
Who's this guy?
No, you have to go.
No, I can't.
You have to go.
You have to go as Sam What's-His-Face.
I can't.
Bolo tie.
This goes against everything.
Felt cowboy hat.
Boots.
I'm going to go, but I'm going to wear my tax the rich dress.
Okay.
I'm going to go dress as an A&m student go into a football game i'm just
gonna put a game day polo on some wranglers and some square-toed boots and just roll up to the
met gala see what they do tailgater of the week yep yep i'm bringing michael as my plus one
bud light's ultimate tailgater do you think they serve bud light lime at the met gala you know he's
a big he's a large guy yeah and i have i've always been like, man, I wonder if this guy's ever just going to run into me
and just beat the shit out of me.
Because he's probably past it.
He's like, all right, that was in the past, in the stupid video, and I can't let it go.
He's Bud Light's ultimate tailgater.
That's the thing about him.
He's a tailgater that also plays ultimate.
Yeah, I don't...
I can see Randy.
Randy, are you into ultimate?
Shrugged, yes. What is ultimate? Ultimate Frisbee? It's like soccer with, I don't... I can see Randy. Randy, are you into ultimate? Shrugged yes.
What is ultimate?
Ultimate frisbee?
It's like soccer with a frisbee.
No, I know what ultimate frisbee is.
I didn't know that's what you were referring to.
You just called it ultimate.
That's how they refer to it.
That's what the...
You know what?
The ones in the know just call it ultimate.
I'm going to say it.
If the backers crowdfund my ticket to this,
I will wear the oversized Arby's polo.
That's the move.
There we go.
I'll recreate the entire...
I still have the shoes.
There we go.
The NEQ Adidas.
I don't know.
I have recently acquired an embroidery machine.
Okay.
And so if you want me to buy a double XL white polo and embroider the Arby's logo on it,
I will do that for you.
You have one that fits you now, and that
doesn't count. I'm sorry I gained 35 pounds
of muscle. I don't know if you did. Those are two different
polos. No, I just filled out, bro.
Why can't you respect that? No one could
fill out. Why do you hate when somebody else eats?
You do. It's a good point.
It's the crab effect.
Oh, we also had Frank Ocean.
He brought a robot baby.
Okay, I'm creeped out.
I'm done with this.
I like Frank Ocean, though.
Everybody knows that about me.
The baby was moving.
I kind of liked it.
Frank Ocean is someone that I'm not very familiar with his work.
Oh, he's got some really good music.
I can identify him in any situation.
He's got good baby-making music.
Oh, really?
Dave said it.
If you're looking to make number dos, what if I'm not?
Should I not put on Frank Ocean? If you're just like, hey, Alexa, put on Frank Ocean. When you're ready to make number dose, what if I'm not? Should I not put on Frank Ocean?
Hey,
Alexa,
put on Frank Ocean when you're,
when you're like ready to get down,
it'll set the tone.
So you're saying if I'm trying to have a second child,
I got to take a dip in the ocean.
I wonder how many Alexis I just turned on by saying that.
I hope you turned on a lot.
I hope it didn't stop playing this podcast for people.
And then they're playing Frank Ocean.
Yeah.
Sorry.
Alexa,
play chain smokers.
Alexa, put circling back, Frank Ocean. Yeah, sorry. Alexa, play Chainsmokers. Alexa, put Circling Back back on.
Hey, Alexa, play the Applebee's song.
Jackson Hayes, which sounds remarkably like a law firm
that does title opinions or something.
Or it sounds like a weed strain.
Should we play a game called Weed Strain or Law Fruit?
There's a great weed strain name.
Real or Fake Weed Strain could be good.
Yeah.
Pencil that in.
Yeah, yeah.
I did my internship at Jackson Hayes in their M&A department.
I didn't get an offer.
I got too drunk at the party.
TFM.
Damn, that's sick.
That's our TFM of the week.
Oh.
Let's do something that we have two minutes to do it.
Two minutes in paradise.
Two minutes in paradise.
Dylan, are you still not watching any episodes of this amazing season?
I'm not going to.
We're down to one episode a week, unfortunately.
Dave, I'm going to start the timer.
You tell me when to start the timer, and I'm going to give us two minutes to talk about Bachelor in Paradise.
Two minutes in paradise.
I think start it over.
This guy is just fucking up the segment.
What's your problem, Dylan?
This isn't an Apple event.
Like, dude, can you just let us have our thing?
Are you ready?
Go.
Yeah, I feel like we've turned a corner and the best is behind us.
You're right.
You're right.
I think last night was the final chapter of the best episodes that we get.
Do they come back after the hurricane hits,
or do we think the season's going to be over?
First of all, it's a tropical storm, just saying.
And it's not really a life or death situation they had plenty of notice it wasn't like it just formed out of nowhere i mean hashtag chad did absolutely fine in his his brush with olaf he
was getting content off yeah like i don't know why bachelor people can't uh were you surprised
that brendan and uh piper left uh yeah i was kind of hoping i was hoping they would just lean into
it okay but no they uh i thought brendan handled it fairly well i guess but when he told everyone
that he didn't need them and he was done talking on it i was like dude come on you're just coming
off like a dickhead now he uh when he saw joe leading the mob over he knew something was up
you don't want nice guy joe coming up and exposing you to everybody.
Why did they make Joe the ringleader of this?
There's no way Joe really cares.
Because he has a podcast about Bachelor Nation.
Therefore, he can make content that he can tailor to his podcast.
It's very easy.
I will update.
Brendan has lost over 100,000 followers at this point.
That's insane.
That's crazy.
Natasha now has, I think, 450,000 followers,
where she started below what Brendan was ever at.
So Natasha's absolutely thriving right now.
I like how they brought the Dr. Joe.
And Dr. Joe's apparently good friends with Brendan.
And she told him, he's like, oh.
It changed the entire dynamic.
I felt awful for Natasha, man.
Yeah.
He handled that kind of like a dickhead, if I'm being honest.
Dude, look.
He hasn't seen everything.
He doesn't know.
It's his buddy.
Are we in or are we out on Kendall?
I don't care.
Ivan took the biggest L last night going in.
As she's watching her ex make out, he's like, you know what?
Let's show them.
And she just goes, I'm not doing that.
I'm not doing PDA.
Not feeling it right now.
And Ivan, like the nicest guy ever.
That's all I got about that.
Yep.
Two minutes is up.
We actually went two minutes and six tenths of a second.
I'm sorry for all those out there.
That's acceptable.
That's within the margin of error.
That's okay.
Okay.
Okay.
That's two minutes in paradise.
And right now.
Two minutes in paradise.
I don't like you.
I'm sorry.
You're a disgrace to Micah.
What are you talking about, dude?
Micah has a better voice than you.
No, that's true.
Micah has a better voice.
It's time for This Weekend in Fun.
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Dylan, what are you doing this weekend?
Thank you for asking me, Will.
Friday night or Friday, I don't have anything on the books.
I will have my son, Parks is his name.
We're going to be chilling.
Someone left us a review and said that
every time we talk about our kids we explain who they are and he he referred he said that we we
essentially think of backers as being goldfish and they have no clue who we're talking about
there are new listeners out there who might not know who parks is you're right the parks is my
son we're gonna do something friday something low-key um like we you're gonna watch loki we love to do a movie and popcorn situation on Friday nights, which is always fun for us.
We'll probably do that.
Is he not old enough to realize popcorn's trash?
I might have a fizzy.
I might have a glass of wine.
I don't know.
Popcorn's trash?
Is that what you said?
What are you doing?
I'm not supposed to eat it with the diver tick, but I eat it anyway.
A lot of kernels.
I love popcorn.
Yeah, but when that kernel gets stuck in your gums
and you're just trying to get it out for the rest of the night.
Then you just go brush your teeth.
Yeah, but that's what I do to those.
I will be more likely to get popcorn at my,
like eat it at home than I am at a movie theater
because if I get a kernel stuck in my mouth,
in my gums during a movie, it's over.
I can't get past it.
I do popcorn at the movies, man.
Love it.
Saturday, I believe your sister-in-law is having some kind of something for her birthday.
And I know about that because she's very good friends with Bay, obviously.
Do you not know about this?
Are you not invited?
Maybe not.
Surely you are.
I'll be honest.
I skip over a lot of group texts in the family group text.
So I miss a lot.
It's in there. I miss a lot. It's in there.
I miss a lot.
I will be seeing you Saturday.
I'm quite sure of it.
Damn, it's for the boys.
Yeah, unfortunately some ladies will be present.
That's all I have really.
Sunday, I get Parks back watching football.
I don't know.
That's it.
Looking forward to it.
It should be low key.
Dave, what are you up to, man?
I need Will to ask me. Dave, what are you doing to man it's not I need Will to ask me Dave what are you doing this weekend my
man well it's an anniversary weekend my wife and I Saturday night we'll be going to I'm not going
to say overhyped because I've never been but the most hyped restaurant in Austin since I've moved
here let me finish my freaking sentence why would you do that to him dude i wanted to guess
right sammy's damn are you excited i i am and like it's not just y'all hyping it like people at
micah's uh party the other night we're hyping it people i didn't even know like so i was like okay
and some of the people were from new york so it's i'm looking forward to it austin
doesn't have austin has some good pizza there's not like a there's not like a badass italian spot
the spio is good i like the spio love the spio but um if i'm down there i'm usually going to
june's or something but uh yes we're, of course, like, apparently the only time you can get a table there is, like, after 9.
So, I will be eating, like, four or five meals on Saturday.
Keep an eye out because maybe you can call the day of and see if they can bump it up a little bit.
We're going to go to the bar.
They got a decent bar.
We're going to do the bar at, like, 8, 830.
That's the move.
That's a good move.
Damn, I need to try this spot, man.
You've never been?
When are you going?
Dave. Oh, it's Brett. Brett's been, like, seven times. Yeah, I need to try this spot, man. You've never been? When are you going? Dave.
Oh, it's Brett.
Brett's been like seven times.
Yeah, I've been three times.
I thought you had been.
No.
Dave, I would highly suggest, and I haven't tried it yet because they've been out.
If you can get the lasagna, it looks absolutely delightful.
Absolutely delightful.
It's not done in the traditional style.
I was thinking about doing the gabagool.
Really?
Get some. Oh. Hey doing the gabagool. Really?
Oh.
Some gabagool.
I don't like that I'm recommending this, David, but their mozzarella
sticks are incredible.
Okay. Wow.
I know that's probably not traditional
Italian, but like
I'm not going to go there and not get the mozzarella sticks.
They're just wonderful.
That's all I have to say about that damn all right I'll keep an eye out I hope I don't run into any of your guma's I don't have any guma's I'm just hanging out at Sammy's Dave
honestly the rest of the weekend tomorrow um or I guessiday what day is it i don't even know man um probably
probably doing some norman watching a lot of norm clips really i mean that's that's i'm gonna watch
dirty work re-watch it um i'm gonna watch just old interviews like he's he's got some really good
ones with howard stern highly recommend um i feel like i'm leaving something out that i've got
planned but i don't really know.
But that's pretty much it.
Hanging out with the kid.
Raising a good, strong lad.
You're going to make him do workouts?
I am.
Can he do push-ups yet?
Doesn't like peaches.
We learned that yesterday.
Did he get them in Georgia?
That's the question.
It was beach nut.
See?
Got a few of those over at Wilmont's.
Beach nuts. question there be it was beach not see got a few of those over at Wilmonds beach nuts nuts on the beach anyway um what about you man you know what it is I don't
Friday I'm going to a birthday dinner. Steakhouse style, baby.
I'll be getting an overpriced steak on Friday night.
Bourbon Street?
I'm going to get the Bourbon Street steak from Applebee's.
And then I'm going to go to bed.
And then Saturday I'm going to wake up, watch a little footy with the lads.
I guess I have something I'm supposed to go to.
Is it like a tailgate?
It's a tailgate, but, yeah, but it's at a residence.
Damn, I hope there's some tailgates and tan lines there.
Which sister is this? I want to know
who dissed me. Emily. She didn't.
She shouldn't have dissed you. That's okay.
I only know about it because of the Bay connection. Otherwise
I would be at home. There's going to be bacon there.
And then I'm going to watch college football
on Saturday afternoon. Who's Texas got?
Rice. Oh.
Damn. Are they going to put it in it in rice man if they look if they
look any any um bit shaky you're gonna hear it from klein so hard can't wait can't wait i still
have forgiving client for his you're gonna hear from klein anyway what time's kick i don't know
you're not really even care you're not stoked for the Texas Rice game?
I'm a fair weather fan for the most part.
When Texas starts to stink, I lose interest.
Wait, is Dylan going backwards right now?
Because he's pedaling back real hard right now.
It's a new pod.
Hey, maybe all Texas needs is to get in Rice.
Put him in Rice, that is, and maybe he'll be fixed much like an iphone dylan a phone you're
big into iphone humor dude you should tweet that with the hashtag odds you'll tweet that with that
hashtag that's a good idea dave we do have a nice little uh slate of games on uh sunday morning
if you're trying to get into some footy. Yeah, I was pretty excited about the Chelsea game.
Really?
Who are they playing?
Tottenham.
Tottenham.
We've got Jay Lings making his return to West Ham.
I know, dude.
We've been talking about it on Twitter.
Very exciting stuff.
Yeah, I don't really have much going on besides just, I guess,
just doing birthday stuff for my sister-in-law.
Shouts to Emily.
Let's ride.
Hey, can we do something before we get out of here today?
Wait, she's getting the birthday dinner, then party the next day?
Is it a monumental?
How old is she?
Hey, you don't have to say it.
You know what I mean?
No clue.
Is this like a 30th birthday?
I don't know.
She's my age.
Oh.
So she's 28.
I'm going to start doing two days for my birthday.
You fuckers don't even remember mine.
Dude, I totally remember yours, dog.
The only one who knows mine is this guy, Randy.
March.
Mr. April 7th over there.
Mr. April 5th over there.
Are you in March, Davey?
Nope.
No, you're in January.
February.
Nope.
No.
Rose is January.
You're literally getting colder.
I give up.
You're July 23rd.
21st.
I was close. I was close. You're July 23rd. 21st. I was close.
I was close.
Very cool.
Can we talk about some of our friends, some backers out there for Small Business September?
Ooh.
We got some fun ones today.
We got some favorites.
I love Small Business September.
You guys heard about these Southern River tables?
Not until this morning.
They look mega dope, though. They create
tables, cutting boards, cocktail trays,
charcuterie boards. Looking at you, charcuterie Sally.
It's considered mixed
media. He's a mixed media artist. I'd like to give a
special shout out to him. I don't have his name
on here right now, which is very tight, but either
way, it doesn't matter because we're talking about Southern River tables,
not the makers behind it.
It's Aaron. They combine epoxy
resin and woodworking to make some pretty trippy looking tables,
if I do say so myself.
It took me a while to figure out what I was looking at.
These are like very, like I thought there was actual water on one of them.
I was like, how is this even happening?
There's a lot of inspiration from the natural world out there, David.
This dude didn't know about epoxy.
Come on, dude.
I definitely didn't. What are you doing? If you head over you head over to southern river tables.com or if you hit them
up on instagram or tiktok at southern river tables you can see all of these just go check them out
they're pretty badass these are really really cool actually yeah they are i'm into them they are cool
i don't understand how epoxy works but i'm i i like the look of it one of the top comments on
this one i'm looking at right now on Instagram says,
why does this turn me on?
It's just a video of him making a table.
Damn, call him Kevin Little.
I don't get that, but sure.
Turn me on, turn me on.
It's a song.
We also have Old Gambler Jerky.
Here in Austin, we all suffer from a common ailment known as hometown pride.
Spend a few days getting lost with the locals,
and it's clear that not only do we like it here,
we like things from here,
and be it award-winning barbecue,
world-renowned spirits,
or heck, even beef jerky.
They've searched high and low,
and they couldn't find a jerky
that was made here in Austin from Angus Beef,
simply seasoned without loads of sugar and gluten-free,
so they made it themselves,
and they took it back to the basics,
back to the wild,
back from anyone trying to make jerky something it ain't.
Just meat, heat, and spices, baby.
They sent us some before, and let me just say it'd be a real shame if they did that again.
I will say this.
I'm a beef jerky fan.
It went quick.
Old Gambler beef jerky is so tasty.
It really is.
It is so good.
I remember just taking—we had a bunch sent to the office or brought to the office,
and I was just taking it home and putting it in my pantry and eating it nonstop.
I love this stuff.
You're the one.
Yeah.
If there was a jerky shortage within this studio, it was because I was taking all the jerky.
Very cool.
We should have our own Met Gala where we just serve old gambler.
Tables are like $30.
That'd be fine.
That sounds like an awesome event.
It's the Brett Gala.
Shout out DJ Bane.
If you want to go check this out, which I highly recommend.
I could not stand behind this jerky more than I do.
Go to ogbeefjerky.com.
Again, that's OG standing for Old Gambler.
Beefjerky.com.
That's all we got for today, boys.
Good episode.
It was a fun one.
It was a highly rated episode.
People are going to talk about this one for years to come.
You already know what you're calling it right now.
It's highly rated.
What?
I believe it'll get five stars.
I do believe that, Dylan.
Okay.
Shall we get out of here?
Bye.