Citation Needed - The Oak Island Mystery

Episode Date: September 27, 2017

The Oak Island mystery refers to various stories of buried treasure and unexplained objects on Oak Island, Nova Scotia, Canada. --- Our theme song was written and performed by Anna Bosnick. If you’d like to support the show on a per episode basis, you can find our Patreon page here.  Be sure to check our website for more details.

I'm telling you, you'd like it. I feel like I'm gonna hurt myself. I mean, if you have a bad coach, but honestly, that's true. Any new exercise proger, oh Jesus. Well, hello, me matey. We do it pirates, oughta be a pirate. Eli, what the- Captain Nippos.

I'm never calling him that. Captain Nippos, what happened to all the mics and the mixer and shit? And the computers and the furniture? Yeah, well, me mate, if you want to find me treasure, you have to follow me clues. Your treasure, damn it. Oh, you munchies. For God, we're doing the Oak Island mystery today. Fuck, I want to do pirates.

Look, Eli, if you're gonna... Captain Nippos. I'm never calling him that. Captain Nippos, really appreciate you getting into the spirit, but this treasure hunt doesn't end with you burying thousands of dollars worth of audio equipment underground, does it? Because that would destroy that equipment, all of it. And then it would be useless. Oh.

Yeah. I don't want to do pirates. I no longer want to do pirates. I'm sorry, speaking of which, where the hell is Heath? Yeah, yeah, dead men tend to no tales. You buried him with the, you buried him with the sound equipment. Yeah, no, that totally makes sense. Hello and welcome to Citation Needed! The podcast where we choose a subject, read a single article about it on Wikipedia and pretend

we're experts, because this is the internet and that's how it works now. I'm Cecil, and I'll be the guy who talks first this week, but other people will also talk at least two of them way too much First up are the before and after pictures for both flex or chemotherapy depending on which side they stand on no I'm sorry Cecil you mean that when you get chemo your hair falls in like you get more that when you get chemo, your hair falls in like you get more hair. I thought not. I thought not. I'm working on that rare before, after before photo montage. You don't do that. They have to take a panoramic photo. Full circle, coming from the full circle. Also joining us tonight are two of four pictures, Heath and Eli. Well, sadly, this is the after for both of us.

We're both in pretty much the best shape of our lives. Not great. Not great. Not great. Certainly the final shape of our lives. I thought I already got introduced at the beginning. The too much talking. Do I get too old? Last week, I already got introduced at the beginning. Too much talking. Do I get too? Last week, I got that, it's confusing.

Before we get into the subject this week, I wanted to take a second to thank the people who make our show go. We know our patrons have way more important things to spend their money on. Virtually all the things, but they give us money anyway, and we're forever humbled by that. And be fuddled actually. If you'd like to learn how to join their ranks, be sure to stick around till the end of the show. That out of the way Eli, tell us what person, place, thing, concept phenomenon or event. Will we be talking about today?

We'll be talking about the Oak Island mystery. And he, you took a look at the evidence and you're ready to be the Nancy Drew to our Hardy boys. If by that you mean have larger boobies than yes. Exactly what I meant. Heath, tell us about the Oak Island mystery. So the Oak Island mystery is the centuries-long story of the many curious discoveries by a series of treasure hunters on Oak Island

in the Canadian province of Nova Scotia. I knew it was gonna be on Oak Island. Call it, call it. Well done, well done. And before you ask, Nova Scotia is first nation language for 10-year-old Scotch whiskey. Who's it? Wait, wait, wait, who gives a 10-year-old whiskey?

That's not a good... No, no, you wanna get your addiction-based ADD Who's it? Who's it? Who gives a 10 year old whiskey? That's not a good... No. Nope. Nope. You want to get your addiction-based ADD under control and start telling us relevant details that aren't clearly false? Okay, weird thing to say, rude.

Whatever. Yes, I would love to get that under control, Cecil. And I'd love to cause a vaginal orgasm one day, as long as we're naming pipe dreams, but let's move on anyway. Um, I'm going to start out with a little teaser. This story is going to involve a band of pirates, William Shakespeare, Edgar Allen Poe, FDR, and the Holy Grail.

Get ready. Wow. This is like Eli, explain why he's naked and erect. That's erect. And all these hookers are dead. Oh, wait, that's Tom, forget it. Hey, two of them started off dead. You pay less for those.

Not that much less. It's not, it's not that discount you think. John, but no. No, no, no. No, no, no. No, story begins in the summer of 1795 when a teenager named Daniel McGinnis decided to explore Oak Island, which sits just off the coast of a community

called Western Shore, located on the Eastern Shore of Nova Scotia, go fuck yourself. And while McGinnis was walking around, he discovered a circular depression in the ground about 13 feet in diameter. Her team feet in diameter. Geez. New show on Discovery, my 600 pound depression. I think that show's already there. There was a rumor going around at the time,

based on the words of a dying sailor, that the famous pirate Captain Kid buried a bunch of treasure in the region back in the late 1600s. So McGinnis got a couple friends and started digging the depression. Oh, sure. He gets treasure. I spent so much time around dying sailors and it's just, I'm a gay guy. This I never saw my sons grow up that it's fucking bullshit. And now announcing our first guest ever for a citation needed, seal team six. Here to beat Eli within an inch of his life, which appears already done. Who comes pre beaten? That's not.

We did a discount for that too. Michael J would bring it on. Yeah. So the kids got down about two feet with their digging and they found a layer of flagstones. After removing the stones, they kept digging and noticed that there was a clearly defined edge to the pit based on the way the dirt was packed. They also reported the appearance of scrap marks, which seemed to indicate pickaxes or other tools had been used, or that a zombie lady was going to crawl out of a TV.

It was 1795, so that didn't make any sense and it turned out to be the tools. Anyway, the flagstones and the pickaxe marks made them curious enough to keep going. And after about 10 more feet, they found a layer of wood timber across the width of the hole. After removing the wood and continuing, they found another layer of timber 10 feet further down. And then finally, after the same pattern continued through 20 more feet of dirt and two more wood barriers, they gave up. Apparently this was a combination of, hey, this is probably stupid and also superstitious

dread. Um, I guess dread of those legendary Canadian ditched liches. Which is weird because you know that lich is gonna be obnoxiously polite about you stealing his draft. Really story about this, but found my intellect and soul to this factory. So you have to devour you with a hoard of subordinate corpses. It's not only be a minute, don't only be a minute. Okay, you did bring gift bags, you. This is lovely. Thank you.

I could tell you really put thought into this. It means a lot to me. Thank you. You can eat me with your corpse. They dug, wait, they dug down 30 plus feet and then they gave up. That's like being married 20 years and then getting a divorce. You're saying he's Hey, how deep you dig it's all still mud that's just

I feel like if it was gonna cost you treasure to stop digging I have 58% less treasure. You gotta figure out your pot odds, man. You gotta think about the pot odds. So the first try didn't work out. It didn't work out because they quit. That's not how it didn't work out. It works.

Yeah, all right, they quit. But one of the kids, John Smith, if indeed that was his real name, perhaps his real name. We don't know. We don't know. It's Wikipedia. But John Smith was still convinced that there was something valuable down in the pit. So he bought the land and eventually put together a crew of his own, including some grown-ups with money.

And in 1804, they established the Onzlo company whose business plan was treasure hunting in a weird pit because Teenager found some wood under some dirt. I spent the entirety of my teen years trying to hide my was. I don't know, the whole like treasure hunting in a weird pit because a teenager found some wood under some dirt, judgeyness. It's a little big headed for a man who makes his living doing radio. You have to search for that. That's what I'm saying. You're all a fraction of it.

Search very specifically for, which is what you have to do to find treasure. I present you, Heath, this off-raid end of your yarn. Please continue. Thank you, Cecil. So the onslaught company started up the pit again and eventually got beyond the original digging from the kids into new territory. At about 30 feet down, no, the math on that does not check out. But this is the internet and that's how it works now.

So about 30 feet down, they hit another layer of timber, but this time with charcoal around it. And as we all know, gold is usually found right under wood and charcoal. So they had a side and kept going. After 10 more feet, they found another layer of wood, but unlike previous wood barriers, it had sap in between the timbers for extra ceiling actors. Obviously, that was even more auspicious than charcoal. So these guys were pumped and they kept going,

isn't the sap usually just in the wood? I don't know. This is like a game of vertical pitfall. I bet after this, it's more wood than dirt, than three alligators in a vine. That's what I'm doing. Well, we have to be fair to these guys, though. To this day, charcoal and sap between the wood are the top 10 most interesting things

in Canada content. Oh shit. Only when a Lannis is on tour, you plebe. She's on the top 10. No, she's not. She really is. Never heard of anybody being so excited about finding things so mundane. It's like they unearthed their dad's collection

of JC Penny catalogs. So, did they keep digging? What did they find next? John, Benay. No, he's continuing. Please continue, Keith. They did keep digging. The next thing they found was 10 feet of dirt again.

30 feet down now. They're 30 feet down again. They are five feet down now, doesn't matter how many. 10 feet dirt again, followed by another layer of timber, along with the most exciting thing yet, a bunch of coconut fibers. Oh, shit. This is just got real real real real real.

And since coconuts don't grow in Canada, these guys do something interesting must happen. Specifically, lots of the crew thought this meant a delivery from the Caribbean. Amazon was not fucking a route back. But yeah, the delivery from the Caribbean made sense considering that coconut fibers were often used on long voyages as padding for important cargo. Now other members of the crew, however, argued that a swallow could, you know, grip it by the horse and fly the coconut tin. It led to a really silly argument.

It's not a matter of where he would grip it. That right after they find this layer of unrelated swallows, which coincidentally is what Tom calls the hookers he kills. I'm really beginning to regret confiding in you, Cecil. So did they reach the Earth's core yet heath or they still got a couple more. Only three to go. Yeah. You have the first thing you helped.

All right. Well, spoiler, we eventually find a few of Tom's fingernails, but the first big discovery, if we're not counting dirt and wood, finally happened at about 90 feet down. That's where they found a mysterious stone tablet with strange symbols inscribed on the face. Oh, I bet they say your princess is in another castle. Yeah. Yeah.

So they pulled it out of the pit. Pulled out? And about 80% effective. They're almost there. Yeah. 80%. Yep. And they decided to make that piece of stone into part of a chimney and not use it for

treasure hunting at all. The way they're idiots. Yeah, at least out for another 60 years or so. So yeah, pin in that, but we'll get there in about 60 years. Pin in that. Okay, guys, bad news. Got these giant stone letters, CLU and E. So unless we find an N-word loss, I guess we use them as a toilet, I guess. But at this point, if they found gold, they'd use it as a fucking toothbrush. They put it in the chimney, not even on the mantle, just in the chimney. Stone inside the chimney. Yeah.

So now that they have the giant clue no longer blocking their physical path, the onslaught company kept digging a little bit further down to about 98 feet and finally went home today. Then when they came back the next morning, the pit was about two thirds filled with water. So naturally they assumed somebody had poured about 65,000 gallon-sized buckets of water just to fuck with them. Brake war. Yeah. So they got some buckets of water. Just to fuck with them. Brake water.

Yeah. So they got some buckets of their own and started bailing with pit. What do we want? But it turns out that was classily stupid because no matter how many buckets they scooped out of the pit, it kept refilling itself. Almost as if this pit was on the coast of an island

and had some kind of mysterious water. Well, that rain last night sure was salty, huh? Too salty. The clouds should eat more pineapple. That's all I'm saying. Well, to be fair, eventually they could have emptied the ocean. So, love you keep digging to the mantle.

The water's just going to vaporize. Right. Exactly. Nope. All right. So the magical, the magical font of infinity was making things pretty tough. But the onsla team wasn't ready to give up yet. They had more chimneys to store their clues. So that all full. Yeah, so, uh, that year they hired what I'm assuming was a super intelligent coyote with an acme pump and started bailing out the black. And I was working for a minute, but then the machine faltered and when the super intelligent coyote went over to check on it, the pump exploded and spun his head around.

So it was facing backwards. This led to a high. It's not going to happen. Naturally. So the pumping didn't sound like it worked out. What's next? It did not work out. But then the following year, they got the team back together to work on a new plan.

They decided to dig a new pit next to the first one tunnel down past the magic fountain and then dig sideways into the money room. Oh, of course. I know. I'm a bit chained on my way. I want to dip sideways into the money room. Can I dig sideways into it? You move the money room to me. You move the money room, I'll stay here. Back it up, back it up. Yeah, but unfortunately for the onslaught company,

the water demon saw this coming. They could tell what they were trying to do. And he flooded the second pit also. Oh no. So the onslaught company finally gave up. Noah, see, so when did man discover how water works during the first golden shower, right? So presidential. So best word about 40 years. And another team of trailer park boy ancestors decided to start up the hunt.

Again, they were called the Truro company. And since the pit was still filled with water, they got a comically large auger from a really weird store. And started drilling the bottom by hand. You don't start with the whole hand. That thing considerate that the same drill bottom. And this actually led to the first mention of gold being found when the auger came back up with three small links of gold chain. How cool is that be if you did that with your hand? That would be so. Three small.

All right. Or the other theory is that some guy just pomed the three links and pretended they came from the game. Right. Right. Yeah. Look at what I found. If only we had more investors to go deeper, get a bigger auger. I don't know. I like the

idea of just burying gold changes. Yarm, you may, you must make it into a chain, me boy, for fun, Cinece. Yeah. And also, I think the excitement at this point was an incident with their foreman following another drilling soon after the foreman of the crew was seen grabbing something from the auger wiping some dirt off and putting the thing in his pocket. And then immediately after he left the company, which I really hope was just an amazing prank by some guy who wanted to retire. Other than the gold links and the great prank by the foreman, the Truro company didn't find anything more and also had to eventually give up around 1850. Then in 1861, yet another team took over the hunt called the Oak Island Associations. They also went with the parallel pit strategy, and they also didn't understand why saltwater

kept filling both pits in perfect timing with the ocean times. They ultimately found nothing, but did make it into the timeline as the team with the first of six deaths at the pit, which happened when a boiler exploded and killed a guy. That was the first one. Wait, so so far three companies formed and all failed so far. Is there a Trump branded excavation coming? After only six people died, they got a plaque for safest workplace environment of 1860. Did anyone else make a chud tunnel?

And move to the other side there. Not then. That's how I pitch anal. Let me make a chud tunnel. It's, it's, it's very pale and scared of the light. So. All right. So it's like the mid 1860s around the same time.

Somebody finally decided to examine the stone slate that had Iant J. U. Clay at Stone. And according to one of many accounts, all of which are so highly disputed that everything I've been telling you is pretty much meaningless. But according to one, a professor of language. Wait, wait, wait, a professor of language.

It's like all languages are the big one of them. All the languages, Tom, don't make it complicated. He had a babble fish and he knew all languages. And he was from a university in Halifax. And he was able to decode the weird markings again because he knew every single leg. Yeah, bullshit. Yeah.

Inspired by Edgar Allen Poe's short story called The Gold Bug. There's the Edgar Allen Poe connection inspired by that short story. The professor basically figured it out like a cryptic quote from the newspaper. Apparently the etching said 40 feet below, two million pounds are buried. And this has led lots of people to keep leaving the theory about Captain Kids buried treasure. And while you try to think of any fucking reason a person

would put my secret treasure is right below, you're almost there. You'll lack the suspense link. It's part of the show that we call Apperpoah Nothing! Okay guys, very exciting day. Time to pick up where my friends and I left off as boys so long ago and find that treasure! Yay! Okay, great first week. Little water problem.

Hey, Ellen, pal, I'm talking. Okay, we can get back to bailing in a second. Okay, bud? Okay, it's still in there. Water's still in there. I know, I know, buddy, but I'm talking. All right, let's go home. We'll start fresh tomorrow. Okay, big water problem. House side. Is that helpful? No, no, okay.

I talked to the pump guy and he, oh, really? Alan, we spoke about this. I think I see the bottom, Biles, I'm getting on the... Standing on the bottom. Why don't you standing on it? Here we go.

Okay, so, uh, the pup exploded. That's a step back. No doubt about that one. Hmm. Dude, they still fill with water. I quit the hole. Guys, if we just... Yeah, me too.

See ya. 20 minutes. Maybe 30. Guys, almost there. And we're back. When we left off, yet another team of treasure hunting stooges had stepped in and stepped in it. And we learned that the thing that says clue on it

shouldn't be repurposed for building materials too quickly. So he let's dig a little deeper, shall we? Okay, so despite the decoded tablet with the giant clue, there was another hiatus in the treasure hunting after the Oak Island Association gave up in 1867. But then in 1890, everybody got excited again. This was partially because everyone's stupid and partially because somebody found

a small copper coin on the island, not even in the pit, though, just somewhere on the island. Oh my gosh. Regardless, this led to a new team of hunters forming the Oak Island treasure company. And with shiny copper and scent signs gleaming in their eyes, they started digging. Oh, no.

And now also in addition to digging, they set off dynamite underground in order to spring all the booby traps they were convinced were there. And of course to spring all the booby traps they were convinced were there. And of course kill all the mystical water demons and the bottom. But they found a copper coin. You know, like have a penny, leave a penny, need a penny, dig a relentless series of pits all across some stupid island until it's parked like a horny teenager's face. Now that is a lot less catchy. Let's stick with take a pack. But now I want to take issue with the way you phrase this because it seems to me

that the Oak Island treasure company may have just assumed that Chester Copperpot would be carrying candles. Just not seem like a crazy assumption to me. The younger members of our generation, that's from a movie about adults who torture their mentally handicapped brother and some strange children. That's what that movie is. That's actually goonies part two. We're fucking dark food. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

So, uh, back to the story. So if it seems like there's a pattern here, that's because there absolutely is much like the teams that came before them, the Oak Island treasure company spent way too much money finding one small useless thing got way too excited about it and also killed a guy. The thing they found was a tiny piece of sheepskin parchment with letters V. I written on it. And apparently they sent this to some specialists at Harvard who verified its authenticity. Whatever that means, I guess authentic is a tiny piece of paper that said, V.I. Whatever.

Yeah, that's authentic. And by the way, we'll get to the Shakespeare connection soon, but this might actually be the first little bit of it. It's very likely that this was a lost manuscript of the sequel to Henry V called Henry V. It's a fucking, it's called a Corteau Heath unless it's part three of Henry the Seventh in which case it was printed as an Octavo, but read a fucking book, manuscript, this second earliest printed work of Shakespeare outside of the folio format, manuscript. I think we can all have a good chuckle at our friend

Alright, so Eli's hanging from a locker perfect. So moving on the parchment thing turned out to be pretty boring and useless much like this entire team turned out to be pretty boring and useless, much like this entire team. But the death part of the story is definitely worth mentioning. So remember that pit keeps filling up with ocean water? Well the new foreman, a guy named Maynard Kaiser, was standing on a platform a little bit above the water level, giving a big speech to the crew. And then I don't know where a shark jumped out of the water, grabbed Kaiser in its teeth and dove back down to the pit just like deep blue sea. Just like say me out.

Just like it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, speaking of jumping the shark, are there still companies forming to dig the water hole? We're not just going to let that go. That's the death we're promised. Yeah. So the next major event on the timeline is in 1909 when a new company called the Old

Gold Salvat Group showed up on the island. Sorry, I did a rip again. The next major event was when everyone figured out how to get the shark out of the pit. That was the next. After everyone went, we got that shark out of this hole. All right. Well, I obviously made up the shark. That was completely bad. But a guy named Mater Kaiser did die when a pulley broke and dropped him like a hundred

feet into the pit. Oh, yeah. Anyway, fun fact, one of their crew of this new company just happened to be a 27 year old guy without polio named Franklin Delano Roosevelt. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no several vents around the island's coast that led ocean water into the pit. But they weren't able to close the vents and they never found any gold. Nonetheless, Roosevelt continued to be weirdly obsessed with Oak Island treasure for the rest of his life. Um, according to a letter he wrote to a friend while he was president, FDR was just about to head back to the island when World War II broke out and he was all pissed. He was like,

fuck, now I got to deal with this now. He's fucking nuts. He's fucking up my treasure home. I'm gonna run. I mean, how many lives could have been saved of Hitler had just gotten into geocash. You know, people always get distracted by the six million Jews and the two million casualties of Stalin, grad and shit ship but that war had real victims too. Yeah. We're ruined. To be fair, Trump is going through the exact same thing. He had almost found all the eggs from the White House egg hunt when Charlotte still

happened. He was like six eggs away, guys. So a nicely painted eggs on both sides of the head. Very nicely painted eggs on both sides of the head. Very nicely painted. So next up on the list of hunters was a team led by a guy named William Chapel, who was part of the Oak Island treasure company, who failed to find anything back in the 1890s. Chapples crew started working in 1931, but immediately had trouble. Most importantly, the island was full of holes at this point and they couldn't

figure out which one is the original pit so uh... they just guest and got it wrong and i'm making a new which obviously didn't have a new old they did however stick to the theme of finding not treasure and getting way to excited this included a lamp did however stick to the theme of finding not treasure and getting way too excited.

This included a lamp, an axe, and a bunch of other stuff that 130 years of failed treasure hunters would obviously leave. The island at this point has to be the geographical equivalent of a real dollar. It's just all holes with nothing inside. I just love this image of them like getting all excited like, ah, the lost diary of Dave, the treasure hunter. Fuck, I gotta write this in my diary and then. I'm all excited.

So Jamel's team gave up in 1932, but by 1935, an eccentric steel magnate from New Jersey named Gilbert Hedden decided to buy the pitland and I guess you use this knowledge of metal to finally uncover the treasure, owning a steel company and finding gold are both metal based in general. So he was confident he could find the gold. Yeah, right. Because that's how that works. I own part of two podcast companies.

And I'm not even allowed to have my own computer. So that's not sound logic. Also, uh, headon was apparently convinced that the Captain Kid theory was true because he read a book. Um, I can't stress this enough. A fictional novel of fiction. It's called Captain Kid and his skeleton island.

And in that work of fiction, there was a fictional map that Hadin was convinced had to be Oak Island. Hadin was so sure about this that he just showed up in London, went to this author's house to bother him about the map and the author was like, oh, wow, you really

should have just like sent a letter first. No, it's fiction. You're just picturing hadn't being like, oh, bummer, you still want to get lunch and the author's just like, oh, with the man who thought my children's book was real? No, I'm good. I gave before. Yeah, so after the rich guy gave up, there was another long time out on the hunting. And then in 1959, a professional crazy person named Robert Restl took over the pit. Restl made his money doing a motorcycle stunt show called Globe of Death,

in which he and his wife would drive around on motorcycles at 65 miles an hour throwing large metal balls at each other. Apparently that's a show people watch. You know what, but before internet porn, we took what we could get. We took what we could get. Yeah. Wait, wait, wait, wait, it took what you could get. I would wash that and porn right now simultaneously.

Two screens. I'm right. I was thinking you jerk off to it, but I wasn't sure. No, it was kind of vague. So yeah, you do, you do. Yeah. So the transition from globe of death to digging a pit was actually a big step up in the sanity department for this guy, RESTL.

And I would have guessed also in the safety department, but it turns out I would have guessed wrong. Here's the story. On August 17th, 1965, Mr. RESTL was peering over the edge of the pit. They were working on when he inhaled a whole bunch of carbon monoxide fuels from a gas engine they were using right fucking next to him. Got knocked out unconscious and fell into the water filled tunnel. Oh wow. Then his son Bobby saw this happen ran over to help and also fell in. That's when two other workers ran over

and the exact same thing happened. All four people died. Last guy falls in is the great, great grandson of the guy from the boat from a couple of weeks ago. Just like, okay, you have to admit, foreign a row is funny, right? Alan Thorne will come on. This is like bobbing for OSHA, right? We don't play human dominoes enough. Just light them up. right? We don't play human dominoes enough to slide them. Very true. I'm going to get an email. I saw how dominoes

are really played. They're not meant for stacking. Yeah, they're dumb cards. They're dumb cards. That's a domino. Thanks correction person. You couldn't afford to break first. So a little bit after the rest of the Scott there are obvious Darwin Awards, a geologist named Robert Dunfield took over the operation and he decided

that he needed some heavy machinery. So he built a bridge from the mainland of Nova Scotia to make it possible. Dunfield actually managed to drill all the way down to bedrock, which included the discovery of what seemed to be a 40 foot deep empty chamber that he hoped to explorerock, which included the discovery of what seemed to be a 40 foot deep empty chamber that he hoped to explore. I'm timidating, but I'd give it a try.

I'm not saying no, but some other rival treasure hunter got mad and bought all the property on the mainland side of the bridge and shut it down for spite. Literally built a museum right where the bridge was done. This period, so Donefield couldn't bring in anymore equipment and Donefield eventually gave up after a really weird sitcom feud. So Donefield left in 1966, then in 1967, a new group called Triton Alliance started digging. Really, they don't even get enough of that.

They're not optimistic people. They're gonna like, what per year is the face right now? A lot of optimistic people. So Triton Alliance started digging and eventually reached the empty chamber that Dunfield had also found. So they lowered a video camera into the pit and saw what they believed was a severed hand, a corpse and several treasure chests. Well, but apparently, all these people had crippling pirate stuff,

paradolia, because they said dozens, it's for 10 different times and found none of the stuff that they thought they saw. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, what did they think that the corpse and the severed hand were still around from the original burying like 200 years ago? I was like, I was just like, I was like a corpse, the pirates were like stashing to eat later. They put it down there. I just want to know the mood of that room, right?

Like, all right, guys, am I crazy or is that a pig leg? I mean, it's straight, it is straight. They bring, they send a video camera down there. They just see a guy with misaligned eyeballs shouting baby room. So despite everything we just talked about being freely available public information, Oak Island continued having a series of treasure hunters making land deals and drilling new holes more or less continuously all the way up until the present day. Still no pirate gold, but there's been plenty of evidence to back up some interesting theories. So before we wrap it up, let's take a quick look at some of the most popular theories.

First up, some people think the pit is a natural sinkhole, but those people are nerds. Boo, moving on. Another theory is that the pit was constructed in 1789 by the French Navy as a hiding place for Marie Antoinette's lost jewels, which actually makes a lot of sense. I mean, we all know she had to have someone sneak it out of the building when all the poor people attacked her palace in 1789. Also, the French did have a Navy. They knew about Canada and 1789 is a year before 1795.

Oh, there you go. So fit together pretty nicely. Good theory. Here you go. What did the French Navy just like forgot to come back? Any other theories, he's? Yes, there's also one out there proposed by a guy named Barry Fell, who was basically

David Barton of the 1970s. No, of course. And his cell, that stone tablet with the inscription was actually written by ancient coptic Christians. And it said, to escape contagion of plague and winter hardships, he has to pray for an end or mitigation. The people will perish in misery if they forget the Lord alas. So slightly different than 40 feet down to. He's right. He's right.

It's a lot more words. Yeah. And here's the It's a lot more words. Yeah. And here's the thing about Phelous Deary. He's pretty sure these cop to Christians sailed from North Africa to Nova Scotia, looking for a hiding place to keep one really important secret sentence. How about how to avoid plague, right? I mean, why would you bury the, you, what we don't want just everybody not having plague? It's the Jenny McCarthy story. Like Shakespeare also a tragedy. Speaking of which, Cecil, by far, the best theory and the one that's clearly born out by

the facts is the connection between the Oak Island pit, the parchment with the letters vi, may remember that from before, and the fact that all of Shakespeare's work was actually written by Sir Francis Bacon. Well, here's the thing, The evidence spares it out. If it wasn't obvious already, all the evidence we talked about today pretty much seals it. Plus Bacon invented an infinite spring back in the day, infinite spring and water. And he was always using words with the eye. It's closed.

Yeah. Okay, close the other way. Case closed. Close the opposite. Opened and then closed. No, upside down closed. I thought it was just a figure of speech. I rest my case, moving on.

Cecil, would you like to ask me to summarize it? I would love to. I'm going to do that right now. Here we go. And if you had to summarize what you learned in one son teeth, what would that be? Eli has a $200,000 degree from NYU about a fake author. Are you ready to answer whole related questions from our panel? I am very ready for this. All right. All right. Unbeknownst to the audience, this entire episode was actually just an elaborate analogy for what?

A, Trump's travel ban. Be heath's first sexual experience. Is it still to come? No, different hole, different hole, different hole. No, this was filled with water now. That is thrilling. That is eerie. That is eerie.

Is it so far my answers be? All right, there's two more. Hold on, don't get out of yourself. Don't answer yet. Was it C, me trying to figure out what casting director so on Sam Warthington? Or D, the life and times of Eli's first hamster. Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! E, both B and D. Ah! Ah! Ah! I had sex with you last night. At my wedding. Just like running seductively on a wheel. I need to look across the room.

Well endless love place. My hamster, right? No, I don't, I don't think we have. I don't want to. All right. That's a hand. That's it. I don't want to wait. All right.

Well, guys, to believe that there's treasure in them, there are holes. You have to believe some pretty impossible shit. Which of the below is the least egregiously stupid? A, that pirates use shovels to bury treasure so deep you later need machines to dig it out. Pretty stupid. Turns out, B, that anyone with any money ever went to Nova Scotia. That's pretty stupid. See, the pirates are basically human squirrels, just bury in golden for getting to come back before I don't remember. Everyone write it down. D, that when three

guys pass out and fall into a pit of water and drown, the best thing to do is to run right over and see if you get out. Wow. Tough. A and D are both very attractive, the graciously stupid answers. I'm going with A though, just keep the pun, the pirates and shuffles. I was shocked. I was shocked in the story when they're like, yeah,

they dug down like 90 feet with shovels. What? All right. Many times throughout history, he's we couldn't help ourselves and could not stop digging in holes. True story. Which of the following is one of those times a Kim Kardashian B New Orleans C two fisting it and that's not a drinking reference by or D Danny Treo's face. it is definitely be mission accomplished in orals heck of a job brownie

okay i'm i turn my turn which of the following pieces of evidence prove that shakespeare both existed and wrote his own place is it selection from sir Thomas more written in his own hand that still exist today and is available for purchase at the the British Museum with his trademark brilliance B He's surviving signature for his rental of apartments which match the aforementioned paper and have been dated by scientists who do science So many. So many.

The fact that he was in a trial and testified in court, and there are records of him doing that. D, all of the above, the parts of my left that are at Dick joke related are not alive. D. And so, all right, well, if we make like $200,000 on this episode, you're totally worth it.

You're a great toss. Well, no, because that would, that way it would have to be, because that wouldn't be, he wouldn't get to keep all of that. Yeah, no, it'd be a million. We have to make a million. Okay, and then he just had a wash. I just, I just want to point out if that happens, he's still just at zero. Yeah, he's at a wash.

Yeah, at that point. He. He's at a loss. Yeah. At that point, he just basically topped the tank off. You have a million dollars. You shouldn't like be a phrase and be like, you shouldn't just have gone, aw, you can still give us a million dollars. Don't think. Honestly, don't give Tom his, but everything that you can give us, sorry.

I give you $420,000. All right. Well, it was E Sir Francis Bacon wrote everything and I changed it on Wikipedia. Correct. I win. I win. He does win. He does win.

Eli wins. So Eli, you get to announce who's going to be next week's essayist. I nominate a fellow Shakespeare a professional like myself. No illusions. Okay. And now I'll toss it over to my lovely wife Sarah for last week's Twitter answer and this week's Twitter question. Thanks guys.

Last week's question was what would be the title of a romantic comedy about Marie and Pierre Curie? We had so many great answers we chose the top five. From Twitter, Khalib Lach says, 500 days of chemo, Ekmanson said, legally pitch blend. Secure a Shinra CEO said, led Linings cookbook. Psycho Pomp Gecko said, 10 things I hate about,-238. And from Facebook, Greyhunter said, 4 exposures and our funeral. This week's question is, what is buried on Oak Island? Just retweet or Facebook share this episode with your answer

for a chance to be next week's winner. Back to you Cecil. Alright, well for Noah, Tom, Eli, and Heath, I'm Cecil. Thank you for hanging out with us today. We'll be back next week and by then, Noah will be an expert on something else. Between now and then, check out the Skeptocrat, the scathing atheist, God off of movies and cognitive distance podcasts. And if you'd like to help keep this show going, you can make a prepsote donation at patreon.com slash site AsianPod. Or leave us a five star review anywhere you can.

And if you'd like to get in touch with us, check out past episodes, connect with us on social media, or check the show notes, be sure to check out citationpod.com. Eli is a rape apologist. No! No!

No! That's your sign up! That is! Hey, ring that hook! Hey, Rene, that hurt. Hey, Rene, that hurt. Lots of water, hell of a thing. Good cardio, though. Bailen, we're into the whole body!

We're into the home line! And then we sat on the edge of this large pit. And he drew me like one of his French girls. Okay, Rose. Okay, that's great. But what happened to the heart of the ocean? It was one of the most erotic moments of my life. Okay, that's repulsive. Look, did you drop the sapphire in the pit?

Is it down there right now? It caress me all night with his tongue. Okay, that's great. Rose, really, just, where is the necklace? Can we just get straight to the... I think he was double-jointed, actually. I, it's worth $30 million. We're all going to be rich if you tell us where the

necklaces it was way bigger than a baby's arm no no no saline Dion nope oh my god I quit the so low. Don't leave. Don't leave. He tongueed my gash. My gash is on night.

He did it. I'll up in there. He owned that motherfucker. He's been there. He owned that motherfucker. Give me some Brian Adams. I'm back on board. But no.

Give me some Brian Adams on back on board, but no.