Club Random with Bill Maher - Quentin Tarantino|Club Random w/Bill Maher

Episode Date: March 28, 2022

Bill and Quentin Tarantino randomly riff on movies that make no sense, the developmental stages of babies, Quentin’s love of Politically Incorrect, the Once Upon a Time in America bromance, and that... time Quentin visited Bill backstage in Austin.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 You know, I'm not a fancy intellectual like you. That's not a fancy intellectual. I'm just a sleazy light night top, because that would try to say, Quentin. Some people traveled 300 miles, see that movie. Of course, they also needed an abortion at the same time. You know. Welcome to Club Random with Bill Marr.
Starting point is 00:00:22 Tonight's guest, Quentin Tarantino. Would you totally whipped it out? All right, I didn't realize that it was going to be jointed in there. It's had that Simon Templar, a gold cigarette tea. All right, I would hate someone to just clip the phrase and you just whipped it out. So let's not, but, oh, oh, I don't know, right? Is it me or Dezple Lighters not work?
Starting point is 00:00:47 No, they're a great idea, but they're, that's very practical. I just, I don't wanna like, dis-a-product, but I just feel like- No, I wish they were the greatest. Like I almost, I wish I could, I wish I could smoke, just so I could smoke a lucky strike. I think I must be doing it wrong.
Starting point is 00:01:03 You put the lighter fluid in the back, and it's not a saturated one. No, no, no, that just shit doesn't work for me. No, the minute it runs out of the letter fluid, you throw it away and buy a new one. But it only works, I must be doing it wrong. Otherwise, how did they burn down half of it? No, I'm with these.
Starting point is 00:01:20 They're all seen them in the movies. And they're like, oh, the village has to be saved. And then they fucking... I think, yeah, I think I treat the zip-aligners like big lighters when they were they better lighter fluid. I just throw them away and get a new one. Oh, he's a new one with a with a lovely crew written on it. Here's a new a ZZ top's written on this one. I don't even like ZZZ top, okay. I just know what it works, I feel fortunate. Oh, see, I blew.
Starting point is 00:01:49 Oh, man. What are you talking about? Your flame is good. Another thing I don't want them to clip. But listen, before I forget, I did want to say there was an expression in French. Let's spread Escalier. Escalier.
Starting point is 00:02:09 I know it's pretty cool. I don't know if it's pretty Escalier. Everybody knows Escalier. I'm not going to say that I was special. I'm saying that's the thing I know. Well, plainly or not, if you think that's impressive. No, but Escalier. Everything.
Starting point is 00:02:24 This is a very reshershade to use another sort of pretentious French word phrase. I don't know where I came across it, but I always loved it because it pertains to a part of my life that I find very frustrating. It means escalier stairs, the spree. I don't know how that is translated literally, but what it means is the thought you had that you wished you said.
Starting point is 00:02:53 Oh, wow. And now you're on the stairs. You're leaving and you go, oh, I wished I'd told the boss his wife her meatloaf was great or whatever. Oh, wow. I actually have one of that when it comes to you in your show. I have it every week.
Starting point is 00:03:08 Oh yeah. Okay, of course you do. Of course you do. And of course you do. Of course I do. And when you were on, I said it to you in the green room. I just said it to you over there. But I wished I had said it on the show proper,
Starting point is 00:03:20 which is that the reason I was imploring you to continue your career is because I felt your last one once upon a time in Hollywood was this departure from revenge. You were very sweet in that. And I was used to you being so dumb. Let me finish. Revenge into a love story.
Starting point is 00:03:42 Yeah. Because this would be then be the third time. I didn't get it out. I'm sorry.venge into a love story. Yeah. Because this would be then be the third time I didn't get it out. It's a love story, even though it's between two men. And that is such a departure for you. And to me, it says, oh, I'm in a new chapter in my life. I'm guessing this has something to do with the fact that you're married. You have a little kid. I was married, but I was going to be married very shortly.
Starting point is 00:04:03 Okay, but there you go. You're in the honeymoon phase. Yeah. So it makes sense that you would make a love story movie after so many years of revenge movies. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
Starting point is 00:04:17 no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, look, I think there also is a little bit of age going on and the idea that I was six or seven during 1969, but I was living in Los Angeles. So I remember what it was like driving down those streets. You were only six? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:39 What year were you born? I was in 1963. Fuck you. How do you know that? That's amazing because those years make a difference and yet all those 60s references which just tickled me to the end of the earth. Well, because I was plugged in. I was like, what you're complaining about? What?
Starting point is 00:04:58 Young people now about that they're not interested in the, and older stuff. I prided myself on my pop culture knowledge going back 20, 30 years. Can I tell you like putting in a little detail is the secretive success. You're a master of it. Like putting in a little detail like a screen gems product. Exactly. You know, make, I can't say how much that makes my day. How much that is like a finger up my ass. Not that I really want to make it up my ass. I'm just, I'm just using that makes my day. How much that is like a finger up my ass.
Starting point is 00:05:25 Not that I really want to think about my ass. I'm just using that phrase because society likes that. No, no, no, but you are. You are the perfect, you are the perfect generation. Well, you're the perfect age of the perfect generation. So you were young enough at this time, at the full on going on on television. Of you spent hours with that remote control
Starting point is 00:05:47 in your hand clicking this and hearing the screen gems, logo as it finished up on a show going onto something else. Sweetheart, we did have remote when I saw screen gems. They didn't exist. We didn't have color. No, no, no, no, I mean the old clicker, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon. That was past the screen gems, Concoma.
Starting point is 00:06:03 Era. You're talking about a time, I mean, the time the movie takes place. Yeah, yeah, no, no, no, there were still, there were still, there were still, not in 69. There were only four, there was only four things, but it was like, yeah, there were no clickers. Yeah, in 69, they were, for the big family console, yes, not for the little piece of dead black and white. Not for my family. I believe you.
Starting point is 00:06:25 My father did not get it. When you bought the TV that came with the stereo and the radio and the thing placed the picture records and two speakers, okay, yeah, they came with a fucking clicker, dude. I love that. I still, you know, I have the old stereo here on the property somewhere in a guest house because I couldn't part with it. It was a piece of furniture. Yeah, it's absolutely furniture.
Starting point is 00:06:51 And you put shit on it, right? That there was for inner. Like half of the thing was, you, I mean, my father was, if you didn't put your records there, then you could get really creative and who knows what you could put there. But half of it was like, I mean, it was like this thing that was like, yay high. And it looked like a credenza. You opened a drawer this way,
Starting point is 00:07:12 and there was the turntable. Very modern. Absolutely. And the other way was where you stored your albums. And depending on how, if it was a little of an older nature, you actually had a little kind of curtain. You could close on the TV screen. You know what kids are saying?
Starting point is 00:07:31 The listeners are going, and then they started to churn butter. Yeah. They feel like, how old are these fucks? I'm going to beg you a little assholes. I've been to do a lot of the serious TV watching of that apparatus, but I've saw that apparatus. But you obviously absorbed that stuff at a very young age. There's an aspect in a, because what's a lot of time in Hollywood where it's like,
Starting point is 00:07:56 whenever you see Brad Pitt driving, it's kind of like, the money shot is slightly lower than him in the passenger seat looking up. And so you get all the... going around. But there's a reason for that, because my stepfather, who was taking care of me at that time, he was a piano bar musician. So during the day he was... A piano bar musician. Yeah, you day he was a piano bar musician. Yeah, you like to move the family spaker boys, you know, one of those kind of guys. Tinkling the ivory. Yeah, exactly. He's singing the hits of the day. Patter. I'm sure. Was pattern involved. Yeah, he was actually, uh,
Starting point is 00:08:36 Could you give us a? Well, it was like, you know, he was turning on what the gig was. It was all in like the East LA area. All right. East LA. Yeah, well, that was the first time I was completely Vato at the time, you know? Vato. Well, you know, yeah, Mexican. Oh, sure. Yeah, it was like, in 1969, it was like Latino, but there were still tons of clubs in San Gabriel
Starting point is 00:09:00 and all kinds of places like that. Is this the area of Jackie Brown? Torrance. No, no, no, that's the area that I grew up. Okay. That's the kinds of places like that. Is this the area of Jackie Brown? Torrance. No, no, no, that's the area that I grew up. That's the area I grew up in. But the thing is, just so that you know, so my stepfather, he worked in these piano bars and they had cool names.
Starting point is 00:09:19 Like one one was called my Oak and Trecky home. Another one, and I remember the clubs, and I remember the matchbooks from the clubs, but the coolest one, of course, I'm gonna think this is cool. Was this club that he worked at was like the main club he was working at during our main years together.
Starting point is 00:09:38 Was a place called the drinker's hall of fame. And how you got in the drinker's hall of fame, it's like famous Hollywood Drunks. This is the name of the club. The name of the bar. The name of the club. Fucking brain. It's a bar. It's a bar.
Starting point is 00:09:55 It's a bar. It's called the drinker's hall of fame. And so the outside was painted red. The wild logo for the drinkers, how the fame. And then like, there's like a cartoon picture of W.C. Fields and a cartoon picture of Bogart. So then you go in the club. That's comedy clubs had the same thing.
Starting point is 00:10:14 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, this is over. A comedy club. They had the same thing. This is like a comedy club except for drinkers. But that's exactly what I was talking about. When I was on the road in the early 80s, it's a young comic. That's what every single comedy club had.
Starting point is 00:10:27 Cartoon's of groucho. Yeah, that's not, especially. And these iconic comics, who none of us were anything like. Yeah. You walk into the drinkers' hall of fame and there was like four heroes. They were like the patient's thing
Starting point is 00:10:42 to the drinkers' hall of fame. They had a whole wall to themself. We're talking about a bar that specializes in memorabilia. So wall space is really, really partial. The only four people that got a wall are these four people, naturally, Naturally, W.C. fields. Humphrey Bogart. Of course. John Barrymore. I learned who John Barrymore was. Senior?
Starting point is 00:11:10 Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not Drew Barrymore. No, that's his, that's a graph. But her lineage. Yeah, it's a graph. Okay, she used to live in this house. Oh, wow. Oh, yeah, I know.
Starting point is 00:11:23 She built this. I heard that. That story. She built this. I heard that. I heard that. Yeah, that's story. She built the thing about where we're sitting. Her father is John Drew Barrymore. His father is John Barrymore. Which one shot Lincoln? Yeah. John, actually, John Derek in the movie.
Starting point is 00:11:38 Yeah. I know it's one of those, Marker. And then the fourth one was Buster Keaton. Buster Keaton was a major, major, fucker. I mean, when you think about Michael Keaton, Diane Keaton, Buster Keaton, that name has been good to show business. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:11:58 Buster Keaton was amazing. He was absolutely was. And you know, but yeah, it was all. Are you a student of all that early? Oh, the silent films, yeah. Well, he was. And you know, but you know, but you know, it was all- He was a student of all that early- Oh, the silent films, yeah. Well, he was an interesting- Even silent. No, I'm a, look, I'm a big fan.
Starting point is 00:12:10 Well, here's the thing about silent movies. Is I actually love silent movies. But because they're not of my time, I really only have patients for the greatest. I agree. I always think of them like my dogs. Could you just say it? No, I mean, I was boring, not talking. No, no, no, no. I actually think when you actually give yourself over to silent movies, it's one of those things like when you watch a foreign movie and you forget you're watching the subtitles.
Starting point is 00:12:43 At a certain point, if the movie's good, you're like, you're caught. Oh, wow, I forgot that they weren't talking. I mean, like a good example of that. I'll tell you a good example of that comedy-wise. Okay, so it's like, you've got your three patron saints of silence in a moment, which Charlie Chaplin, Buster Keaton, and Harold Lloyd. The thing is different. Okay, well, they're different than the ones on the wall.
Starting point is 00:13:05 Yeah, yeah. But similar. Yeah. But here's the thing though. All right, is in the case of Charlie Chaplin, in the case of Buster Keaton, pantomime is a big part of what they do. That's part of their comedy. Like, of course, that's it. Well, when there's no sound, you're going to be good at that. But even their type of comedy suggests a pantomime approach to it. They had no sound, of course. I know. But in Bombayl they would have a similar pantomime kind of approach. It's just some degree, all right.
Starting point is 00:13:33 Do they all come from vodka? They all came from vodka. OK. OK. But you can even say necessity, yes. But necessity or not, they made it work for them. Boy, did they? Heronloin is different.
Starting point is 00:13:50 He sounds like me. Right. He's like, he's an actor, he's acting, he never shuts up. And talks all the time. So he's an innovator. I always think of him like the Gene Kelly. Yeah. Because Gene Kelly was not just a dancer, he was a gymnast.
Starting point is 00:14:06 Yes. You know, I mean, it was athletics plus. And Buster Keaton is, it's not just the, I mean, Charlie Chaplin was funny, but Buster Keaton, a lot of it was technological innovation. The industry was, no. Well, what was that? I mean, the one where the house is blown off, but oh yeah, yeah. And it's like like they put the house on a turn table. I mean, they were doing things for the first time. They people, what buss are Keaton? Why Sinites put buss are Keaton ahead of the other three? All right, well, they had the other two.
Starting point is 00:14:39 The ahead of the other two, Harold Lloyd and Charlie Chaplin. Who put them ahead? Sinites. Sinites, you know, young, you know, of the other two, Harold Lloyd and Charlie Chape. Who put them in? Synatise. Oh? Synatise, you know, young, you know, you know, you know, you know, syn- Thumb- Thumb- Buffs.
Starting point is 00:14:50 Oh, syn- I said syn- I said syn- I said syn- I said syn- I said syn- I said the name of some Spanish intellectual. No, syn-
Starting point is 00:14:58 Syn- I said it! I said it clearly. I said it clearly. I said it clearly. I said it clearly. I said it clearly. You make of me self-conscious. I said it very clearly. said it clearly. I said it clearly. I said it clearly. I said it clearly.
Starting point is 00:15:06 I'm not a fancy intellectual like you. I said I'm fancy intellectual. I'm just a sleazy late nightclub because that would have tried to say quitten fine. I eventually came down to the film club. But the reason that they put Buster Keaton ahead of the other two is because he was the first one of that group, even with Chaplain who could do anything he wanted with a camera, was like, let me use the camera to make a joke. Right.
Starting point is 00:15:40 Let me use cinema itself to be the joke. Which was my point about 1917 using this camera itself Yeah, as a what no maybe I got it wrong I put it to a higher mic for self You know wrong You're right and Paul McCarty no songwriting better. I'm just saying for the layman that was my point exactly what you said using the camera itself Well, I'm all down with it like I said said, if they did it in a 15 minutes ago, every single time, I would be more important.
Starting point is 00:16:09 But more importantly, how upsetting is it that Brad Pitt at 55 was so like hot in your movie? Right? I mean, that's not fair. Well, if we shoot him in this angle, like, is there really a bad angle to shoot him? I mean, that's not fair. Well, if we shoot him in this angle, is there really a bad angle to shoot him? Are they using tricks? No, you just talking about the tricks in 1917.
Starting point is 00:16:32 What are you using on Brad Pitt? Nothing. Nothing. No, no, it made me feel more like a 70-some-maker, where I'm lining up a shot, and then I'm looking through the viewfinder, and then my eyes will be seeing Robert Redford. When my eyes will be seeing Steve McQueen. You know, for a guy, there's nothing like
Starting point is 00:16:58 revealing and true to form, true to life, bro love movie, because like, every relationship we've had is a mixed bag. I mean, that's just life on earth. I mean, no marriage has no fights and no hurts. No romance has... Okay, so, but with bros, no. You know, I have no bad memories of me and Jimmy Balloli.
Starting point is 00:17:20 Yeah. It was always good. Maybe we had one fight in 1983 or something. And it's just like when you're dying, who's going to be your Paul Bears? A lot of it, you know, maybe this is an end to the Lovian thinking, but a lot of it's going to be your bros. Who are there all along? Of course, it's going to be your wife, if you're still married and stuff. But like, and so to see two guys who have this sort of symbiotic, but still real, love for each other.
Starting point is 00:17:53 And like I acknowledge you do your thing, I do my thing, they compliment each other. Yeah. I mean Brad Pitt is perfect as the guy who's like, I don't have to be, I don't have to be the star because I'm cooler even as the guy who's not the star. To me, that's the big takeaway. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:14 The in-art of the cap, he wasn't cool. Yeah. But I think even he would say, yeah. No, Brad. He's full of angst where Brad is. Brad is in. Exactly. The true epitome of like, if you're going to buy Zen
Starting point is 00:18:24 and the Brad's in tri fragmentation of it is pretty fucking perfect. Right. And I think they're playing the right characters. Yeah, yeah. You wouldn't want them to switch them like Brando did, and remember when he switched roles and mutiny on the bounty? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:36 Like halfway through the movie. You know what? I think I should be playing the king, and he should be playing Sir Lashola. I should be the hero. All right. And you should be playing the king. And he should be playing Sir Lashola. I should be the hero. All right, and you should be Captain Bl either. I don't know what I was thinking for the first six weeks of principal photography. I was playing the wrong part.
Starting point is 00:18:55 Anyway, my bad. Okay, so you're on. I literally had an actor. I, I, I, Jango and Shay came up to me. He's a terrific actor, but he came up to me and he goes, he was like, I was thinking about a different way that like, my, my relationship with the Broom Hill the character could end.
Starting point is 00:19:14 Oh, really? Oh, okay. What do you think? I go, I wrote it down, okay? So you can read it. It's a pleasure. And so I read it and it's where he kind of saves the day. I'm reading it.
Starting point is 00:19:29 He's like, he has, he has roomilda. He gets her her freedom favors. He sets her off. He never touches her. He does a toucher. And you want a jango to be there. Well, yeah, exactly. So like the next play play it's just all his
Starting point is 00:19:45 he comes to me. He goes, so what did you think of it? I go, what did I think of it? Oh, you're rewright where you're the hero? Are you actually one of the villains? No, that's not okay. No, I'm not good doing that. So the fact that you want a
Starting point is 00:20:04 Django to be the hero and the fact that you want to jang go to be the hero, and the fact that you put his name in the title. Are those connected? There is a random connection. Club Random has brought to you by SignalWire. I've ever been on a typical video conference in call with a bunch of people. It's virtually impossible to understand anyone.
Starting point is 00:20:23 Especially if they're all talking at once. You don't believe me? Remember what it was like the last time a bunch of you tried to sing happy birthday to grandma on a video call because we were all locked inside? Nobody was in sync. Because the latency sucked. That's not the way it is with signal wire. signal wire has virtually zero audio and video latency.
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Starting point is 00:22:07 Go to SignoWire.com slash video, integrate real-time video and audio, N-T-R-App, product or website, and be light years ahead with SignoWire. Go to SignoWire.com slash video today, or you can go to Bill Maher just nailed a fucking another dot com commercial. I have to say, you know, there are very few directors who like I could name all your movies easily without thinking about it in order. I can do that with a few musical groups like I can tell you all the beat- you all the Beatles albums. Like a lot of people could with the Beatles. Well, all the certain era other people have the clueless. But, you know, I could say, oh yeah, there was please, please me. And then there was, you know, with the Beatles and then the hard days. And I know them. I don't have to like, you know, order rubber soul. I haven't memorized them. I just know. Yes, it was rubber soul and then revolver
Starting point is 00:23:03 and then sergeant pepper. I know know that years, I could do that. That's very rare in any art form, but without thinking about it, I haven't thought about it. I know that Reservoir Dogs was your first movie. I remember where I was. I remember 1994, a pulp fiction. There was a girl who had a snippet of that movie on her outgoing message. Well, you remember, which bothered me.
Starting point is 00:23:30 Well, you remember, it was like we're editing, just not just a dick second contest, but. I would hardly call it a contest. But the thing is, I'm editing Pulp Fiction. And I'm watching this show politically incorrect on Comedy Essentials that I think is just amazing. I remember. And I like it so much that I'm going to my editor, Sally Mickey, I'm like, hey, you know what they said last night? You know, every day, you know what they said this night? You know, every day, you know what they said this night?
Starting point is 00:24:07 You know what they said this, you know what they said that? And then after like two weeks of it, I go down to, I think you guys, did you guys shoot out in New York? We did. Okay, so you shot out in New York, but you were having an LA week. And you were like, so I didn't know you were in town.
Starting point is 00:24:21 And you happened to be, you were probably shooting in television city. Maybe yes. But we still are. Yeah. And so I'm, I met some local bar. I remember. I went to fucking Olive, or something.
Starting point is 00:24:32 The Olive. The Olive. I know it well. I mean, I knew it well. I'm at the Olive. And all of a sudden, it's like, you're there, but you're like just there. You're there with your crew. You've just finished your show.
Starting point is 00:24:44 You're drinking. having a good time. I've just finished the fucking episode. I'm like, oh my God, Bill, but you don't know the fuck I am. No, no, I did. We, at Politically Incorrect, were so buoyed by your fandom, your our first fan, I swear to God.
Starting point is 00:25:02 We wore that like a badge of honor, that we dined out on that. Oh, good deal, man. Absolutely. It was like Quentin Tarantino, like, says New New York Times. By the way, the last time I ever got an e-publux, the in that paper, was when that paper, when that show went on the air about a year. And like to cover new. And it was like the headline, it was in their art section, like a point O2 rating and no Morton Kondraki, who was a panelist on one of those round table news shows. That were big members.
Starting point is 00:25:42 The one Dana Carve used to imitate Oh yeah. John McLaughlin. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Eleanor Closet. That was a very fun. The impression was so much better than the show.
Starting point is 00:25:52 No, exactly. No, the show was that. But there was a lot of that point counterpoint. Jane, you're ignorant and sloppy. You know that. Jane, you know that. So, uh, oh, no, I forgot what we were talking about. No, you.
Starting point is 00:26:04 Oh. And we're talking about, no, I forgot what we were talking about. No, we were talking about it. This club cigarettes. What the fuck are button in the... It's not clubs. No, it was interesting where you were talking about the game. I know. Now I can't remember at all, it was interesting where you were talking about because you know. I know. And now I can't remember at all what it was.
Starting point is 00:26:29 I can't remember when we were talking about. I had it, but then you moneyed the waters. No, let it go. You know what? It's like a butterfly. It'll come back. That's how I always say. I always tell the kids who come to me for advice.
Starting point is 00:26:44 After we sing at church. I say, you know, you can, because this younger generation has too much angst. And I'm like, I learned something a long time ago. Happiness is like a butterfly. If you chase it, you'll never get it. But if you stand still, it'll land on your head. Goodnight, ladies and gentlemen. I'm just being the graph to be a sick call.
Starting point is 00:27:10 Oh, I was watching this movie, McKenna's Gold. Oh yeah, I see McKenna's Gold. Of course you have. That's why I thought of you. McKenna's Gold, it's so your error. It's hard to watch. I still have to say that. It's hard to watch. I still have to say that. It's hard to watch.
Starting point is 00:27:27 I wanted to say to you during your show that I didn't. Don't forget that. You go now. It's hard to watch this movie. Not think of you doing a tribute slash parody. Yes. You know, you always cut that line perfect, like where you're like, it's sort of making fun of it, but we still, but more than that, we love it.
Starting point is 00:27:52 You know? Well, not well, because, no, well, thank you very much on that. I mean, like, it's where I'm kind of, it's what I'm coming from. It's what you want to get in the audience. It's like, yes, I can, because we are two people. If you're just, we are the knaff it, then you're not coming from the place that I'm presenting it. We are always the person we are in the present and the person we came from and the person we came from is less sophisticated. So, like, you can do something from our past and it's like, oh, I remember when I loved that,
Starting point is 00:28:23 yes, I was a little more of a dummy and it's a little more naïve, And it's like, oh, I remember when I loved that, yes, I was a little more of a dummy. And it's a little more naive, but it's still beautiful in its own way. And now I can look back on it. And that's actually a very good, that's actually, and not in a snarky way. No, but that's actually, that's actually a very good description of the most actually nuance part about what I do. Right. Yeah, that's not the, that's, that's very nuance. Yeah, no, that's, that's in the, that's in the crevices. That's in the cracks of, of, of, of, of, you know, of what I do. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:59 No, it's like, I had to watch your movie every year. Like Hugh Hefner famously used to watch Casa Blanca every year. Now, you know, he was born in 1925. That came out in 1943. I mean, it's one of the classics usually, you know, when they do those list of great movies, it's one or two, you know, it's like, so he would show it every year. I could watch that over and over again.
Starting point is 00:29:28 I've seen it three times. When it comes on, I resisting because I'm like, you know what, I want to give it a little time. You know, you can burn anything out. But it would really be on that list of movies I could watch over and over again. But speaking of Casablanca, I'm taking both parts of this comedy. Speaking of Casablanca, that's the way I'm taking both parts of this comedy. Speaking of Casablanca, are you ever bothered by movies that make
Starting point is 00:29:51 very successful, but make absolutely no sense? That movie makes no sense. Casablanca in particular? Well, because he has the letters of transit. Yeah, which allow you to get out of the country, which is occupied by Nazis, who are sticklers for the law. And as long as you have the letters of transit, well, we're nothing, we're nothing got to be blue to use, just use brute force. –Yeah, you've got to be blue.
Starting point is 00:30:23 –I first, And the whole premise. We're kind of really all about bureaucracy. So I'm killing people. They're not. They're equal, equal, gambling and bureaucracy. But that's a stupid moment. And yet it works. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:40 What is that? What do you think? What is the... Well, I've actually had an interest. I mean, charisma. You can't buy it. Well, look, when it comes to, uh, when it comes to older classic, classic movies from the 30s and the 40s, that that's just a look at different time period. On the other hand, I was like watching a couple of different 70s movies. And I was surprised
Starting point is 00:31:02 that I had a different response to them. So I watched, and I remember seeing this when this came out, I seen Norma Ray. Oh, yeah. Now I remember seeing Norma Ray in 1979 when it came out, all right. And oh, yeah, Sally Fee was really good on this. And it was like a good kind of movie for 1979.
Starting point is 00:31:19 I'm one of the better movies of the year, all right? To come from the flying nun. Yeah. To finally get from the flying nun. Yeah. To finally get to me a world nominee. And it was like she was gonna get the end. And she was like, she was our new powerhouse actress. And she's gonna get the Kevin Moore, it was great. So I watched the film like two years ago,
Starting point is 00:31:39 sometime in the middle, maybe even a year and a half ago. So I watched the movie again. I'm gonna do this picture where she's up with the song. Yeah, yeah, she got the union sign. ago. So I watched the movie again. I'm gonna do this picture where she's up with the song. Yeah, yeah, she got the union sign. Yeah. So I watched the movie and I'm like, well, wait a minute. Okay, this, this town depends on this,
Starting point is 00:32:02 on the, on the factory. Okay, and what we don't have now is you don't have factories. on this on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on on higher community and maybe like two other neighboring communities after it. She wants to bring a union there. The other people and the factory, the other workers, don't want the union. They understand that their entire livelihood is connected to this factory making a profit. and they understand that. It's not just this Nazi premise, they understand that this is a fragile balance. It's almost a movie that makes the case for the conservative argument that liberals think they know what's best for you. Which is sometimes true.
Starting point is 00:33:00 And- But you look at this- Sometimes they do know what's best for you. And sometimes they look, sometimes they do, but you look at this movie about this factory that would be a godsend and any single community that we can come up with. It's so true. You know what other movie makes no sense? It's like a huge like big fucking movie. And I love it, by the way.
Starting point is 00:33:23 And you're not supposed to love it anymore, but fuck you. Gone with the wind. Oh, which one? I don't know, not which one, but what part? Gone with the wind. Well, what part? I mean, that I would like to play. I like to play Red Butler.
Starting point is 00:33:36 Red Butler has the most amazing speech. No, but you sound like you were going to say what was wrong with it. Anyway, let me do Red Butler speech for you. OK. And if you want to cast me, I'm not only gonna convince you to continue to career, I'm gonna get you to put me in it. Right.
Starting point is 00:33:55 No, I don't want to do that. But, Rut Butler has this speech. You have an actor's ego, I know. Of course. Well, everybody in show business does. Even the writers. No, but in show business, even the writers. No, but you have an actor.
Starting point is 00:34:07 You know you could have gone farther as an actor if you wanted to. I could have gone farther as an actor in a limited type of acting. TV. Yeah. Yeah. Club random is brought to you by ExpressVPN.
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Starting point is 00:37:02 We were talking about stupid movies and God with the wind. And I was, I got it. And I was gonna do, that was as far back as you went, okay. My Clark Gable, and this is Clark Gable, who was the coolest. He was one of the, right. No, you think, I mean. I never loved him, but yes, he was definitely a vet error.
Starting point is 00:37:19 He was cool. Come on. I never thought he'd do it, all right? But he was always like, you know what? My grandmother. Okay. So, going to the wind is a stupid movie because Scarlett, she marries the bad boy. Red Butler.
Starting point is 00:37:34 Right? He's the bad boy. She pines for Ashley Wilkes. Who is the stiff? Well, that's always been the reality. You'd marry the stiff and be pining for the bad boy. It makes no sense. No, it doesn't matter because it's Clark Gable.
Starting point is 00:37:52 Well, in a weird way though, it sets the standard for that type of story because the thing about it is, after that, like somebody like Pauline Kale can make a comment and say, the rep but the role versus the Ashley Wilkes role, and you know exactly what she means. Was she still around when you were making it? No, she just clicked the year before I made my first movie. She quit the business.
Starting point is 00:38:22 What do you think she would have said? We have no way of knowing. Well, I did, you movie. She quit the business. What do you think she would have said? We have no way of knowing. Well, I did. You know, no offense. Yeah, well, we have no way of knowing. It's kind of true. Well, she gave interviews. You were, oh, about you?
Starting point is 00:38:35 She budgeted. Yeah, she earned good. Yeah, it was like, yeah, no, no, no, no, it was, it was really cool. No, no, she was apparently like this. Why did Jean review it then, if she was around to give interview? Well, no, well, she had officially retired, but then people would call her up and have
Starting point is 00:38:48 lunch with her. And they'd ask her what she thought about this movie or that movie. And she would ask. But I remember that era when you were like the new, I mean, I'm telling you, the girl had your snippet of your movie on her answering machine. It bothered me to know. I mean, you were like, it's very rare when like there's the rock star treatment to a direct. Yeah, that was I had
Starting point is 00:39:11 it. I had a good. It's interesting. Well, you were a rock star director. Well, they was just looking. It was also really, it was just really lucky because because the whole American independent film movement happened to explode at the exact same time that the grunge independent alternative music thing exploded. Not familiar with the American independent what? No, no, my movie was part of the American independent. You know, all of a sudden, you know, the official thing. Yeah, well, yeah, we're just all just certain low budget movies.
Starting point is 00:39:44 All right. All of a sudden people were looking, thinking about that like the way you think about like an independent rock record. Okay. You know, the way people would think, you know, not just, you know, just, uh, not just the commercial stuff. Right. Oh, he looked, you know, people might think about American independent movie like the way
Starting point is 00:40:00 you would think about a little read album in the mid seventies. And so people start, you know, so that became... And that was the 90s. That was the 90s. That was this thing. And... Before that, you're right. It was a little more bloated and...
Starting point is 00:40:13 Yeah, I mean, like yeah, sex, slice, and videotape kind of changed a lot of things. Yeah, you know. Right. And then, you know, and then by the time I came in, then there was just like every year there was like another kind of success like that. And they all didn't have to be American, but it was like, you know, there's mine and then there's a train spotting.
Starting point is 00:40:34 But what was those, what was those? I went to high school, I swear. What were those years like for you? Like those, the rock star years? Like did you do a rock star lifestyle? Yeah, kindness. Really? For a while.
Starting point is 00:40:52 For a while. It was easy to do. Given quiring listeners all the details. No, I don't want to do that. You know, I don't want to do that. But it was, yeah. The correct answer, by the way. Yeah. But it was interesting yeah. The correct answer, by the way. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:06 But it was interesting because I was... What about teenage boys who want to live I'm curiously now and masturbate about the thought of what you were doing in 1994 and who we were doing it with. Could you give us, you know, you want to be nice to masturbating boys? Well, the thing is, what are your heartless?
Starting point is 00:41:23 See, the thing is, it was similar to like a rock star on tour because I was kind of going on the film festival tour. Keep talking slower. Yeah, so. So, hey, I'm in Holland over here, and I'm in Holland. Right. Michelle over here, and I've embossed it over there.
Starting point is 00:41:41 What happened in Holland? Oh boy, that was Dutch girl. Boy. No, I always, look, it was a real in Holland? Oh boy, those Dutch girls. Boy. No, look, it was a real, it was a real, it was a real tough time. Love this guy. Okay. No.
Starting point is 00:41:53 I'm just fucking with you. But okay, but that's what we're talking about. Oh, I'm going to win. I am going to do my car cable impression, and get a part, if it kills me. Okay, so what was cool about the carcable role, Red Butler in that movie, not only he looks great, but also he's the bad ass.
Starting point is 00:42:16 And you know, there's a great scene where she's trying to get him, Carol Burnett, remember the sketch? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The curtains in the right line Oh, that great line. She's scarlet doing a parody of the movie and where Scarlet is trying to get Red Bad, but Red Bad, but she is impoverished now from the war. But she wants to have a nice dress.
Starting point is 00:42:39 So she takes the curtains off the windows and makes the dress out of it. And the Carol Burnett's got, she's still got the curtain rise. And you heard the great line, oh, it's just something I saw on the window. And Harvey Korman, flawless as Red Butler, right? Okay. So in the real one, you know, he comes back and he's the the way they shot it like with the kiss with the man's head almost on top of her. You know, there was something very 1939 about putting people in that position where the man is so over. Right.
Starting point is 00:43:20 Oh, yeah. And she's puckering her lips. And he goes, no one else think I will kiss you. Although you need kissing and badly. Ha-ha-ha-ha. We know in 1939 that kissing was fucking, you know, but just that was like, it's so bad. OK, but here's the real thing.
Starting point is 00:43:44 But here's his best scene because he was like the it's so bad. Okay, but here's the real, here's his best scene. Because he was like the voice of reason. I feel like in 1939, you could not get away with saying the controversial opinion that slavery was just wrong. So, Red Butler, he never quite says it, but he says, it's a waste. I don't like waste.
Starting point is 00:44:03 Like that's as close as you could get in that era to condemning it. Yeah. You know, waste of manpower or of talent. You know, you can be red in the minutiae, it can be red in the mind. You just come out and say it's horrible to treat one group of people like animals. You know, that was just too controversial in 1931. Okay. So this is as far as- It's senseless. What?
Starting point is 00:44:31 This is as far as you could go with that. But so he's kind of like presented as the voice of reason. So there's that scene like about a half hour into it where they're at the it's before the war, but they're at some southern plantation where Rhett is visiting like a hundred fucking guys in this library, you know. And they're all going home to fight the war. And he's the asshole. There's going to pour cold water on this. And the guy says, you know, like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, and then the oh, Mr. Butler, you've been to the North. What do you think?
Starting point is 00:45:09 I think it's very hard to win a war with words, gentlemen. What are you saying? I'm saying there's not a canon factory in the whole South. What difference does that make to a gentleman? Well, I'm afraid it's going to make a great deal of difference to a great. Well, I'm afraid it's going to make a great deal of difference to a great mini-generalman. Mr. Butler, you say the Yankee's could lick us? No, I'm not saying it.
Starting point is 00:45:34 I'm saying it very plainly. They're better equipped than we are. They've got factories and collyards and shipyards and fleet to bottle up our harbor and starbursts to death. And all the South has is slaves and cotton and arrogance. I think it's a really good movie. And then they got what the win word for word. I know I'm saying you're describing a really good movie, but it's four hours. It's four hours. It's not all that good.
Starting point is 00:46:02 But where's your setup to the bad part? This is all really awesome. I'm giving you the best part. It's the point. Oh the name of this game is Do the best part from Gone with the Wind. I thought you were to explain. I was explaining why. That was all really good. Right because it's you know why? Because it was a good movie. It's fucking gone with the way he I was trying to do it. He was setting, he was, but like what we like about that is setting up a character.
Starting point is 00:46:32 Yeah. Like we see right from the beginning, they're all going home to go to war. And this guy is like, he's got his eye on reality. Yeah, it's like, hey, we don't have the industry. It's a very, what? We don't have the industry. The industry. No, that's what he's saying. We don't have the industry. We don't have the industry. It's a very what? We don't have the industry. The industry.
Starting point is 00:46:45 No, that's what he said. We don't have the industry. And then they can, in fact, bring the whole set. Yeah, yeah. It's jail. They obviously have the industry. They have a throw right there. Well, where does US feel?
Starting point is 00:46:56 Isn't Selznick the guy who cut that movie? He's the, well, he's the, he was the grandpa who bought the movie. Okay. He's really the author, because there were several directors. Yeah. It wasn't George Cucor on there for a while, all right? And then...
Starting point is 00:47:12 Now, he was a, I love it, he was gay. And you couldn't say that back then. They would say, he's a woman's director. Yeah. But he wasn't really, it was earned in his case because he was a very good woman's director Because he was a gay man, but we can't say gay man. Yeah, we can't say gay man. We have to say women Yeah, but the thing what one of the things about him though was
Starting point is 00:47:36 Apparently he was let go Because Clark Gable Resented his attention to Janet Lee's performance. He was like, no, I want somebody who could like Google, well, be as excited about me as about the Scarlet O'Hara. So they told George Kuhwarker, okay, so now we're going to replace you. The Gable's having a hard time. With Victor Fleming?
Starting point is 00:48:06 You with Victor Fleming. So they replaced him with Victor Fleming. But Janet Lee, you know, calls George Cooper and she was like, you can't leave my director. Vivian Lee. Vivian Lee. That's what I mean. That's what I mean. Sorry, sorry. Vivian Lee. Sorry, sorry about that. The kids are googling and they're like confused.
Starting point is 00:48:24 She was in the psycho with each guy. Yeah, yeah. Vivian Lee, sorry about that. The kids are Googling and they're like confused. She was in the psycho with Hitchcock in 1960. Sorry, that was a big mistake, okay. Vivian Lee. Thank you very much. So Mary Lawrence, Olivia. Yeah, Mary Lawrence, Olivia. So Vivian Lee says, you can't leave.
Starting point is 00:48:36 You know, you're my director. And so then he would get together with her in the night and kind of go over the next day's work. Typical gay man. She's really getting together with the woman. Well, okay, so by the way, this reminded me of what we were talking about. It could have been hours ago, could have been minutes ago, I don't know. But about movies that are stupid.
Starting point is 00:49:00 Okay, so I went to win stupid. Yeah, I said the stupid part though. The stupid part is that I did. You don't remember that she pined, she's mad. Well, no, that we talked about earlier. That's stupid. Here's why Casablanca is stupid. Oh, we talked about that too.
Starting point is 00:49:18 They have the letters of transit. Yeah, we got that one. Yeah. No, they're stupid one, Titanic. The whole thing hinges on at the end. They're not trying harder to get on the table. Is that what you meant? Oh, well, yeah, okay, Dada.
Starting point is 00:49:32 You watch the entire movie. You go through the entire life that they will not live together. You live with them. It gets to half-hearted attempt. So half-hearted. Right. So true. Oh well.
Starting point is 00:49:51 Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm freezing to death. We're going to try this like a couple of more times. Like the voiceover is like, he saved me in every way that it was possible for a person to be saved. Honey, knowing that you feel way about me, could I get up on the right? Yes, could you maybe get a little bit here?
Starting point is 00:50:18 I need to, maybe we think just a little bit about the balance of the weight on the table. I need room for my stuff. I hate to be that girl, but I... Yeah, okay, so... I mean, there's so much... But I love that movie, too. Yeah, I mean, I don't mean to.
Starting point is 00:50:35 There's so many... Like, the table could have been small. There's so many things that they could have done that... Have you not asked that question? No. The table happened to be... No, no. No. That table looks big enough for two people.
Starting point is 00:50:46 It does, that's the problem. That's the problem. That's the problem. You hit on it. You know, I've been doing this for, thinking this for years, that's the problem. If they should have made the table a little smaller. Because otherwise, it just looks like
Starting point is 00:51:01 you're kind of being a dick about it. You know what I mean? I was so with it when you wanted to get away from the rich asshole. You are with them every step of the way of the entire three hour movie. Actually. And then all of a sudden, you're right there with them. They're going, wait a second. Wait a second. Wait a second.
Starting point is 00:51:24 Don't be the way I personally related to Billy Zane when he grabbed a child and said, I have a child. To me, that's the hero of this fucking thing. He gets off the boat by stealing a baby, claiming it's his. I mean, that's the American way. Okay, well, no, I do, but time it is, but... No, but you actually, you bust me because I say it all the time. I use it all the time. Especially when I'm talking about movies because I kind of learned it from Paul and Kale. I use the Wii. You use the what?
Starting point is 00:52:11 I use the Wii, where I'm like, no, no, we want this. You want this. All right, so I don't say I. No, I'm kidding. I mean, we do. I really don't admire. Believe me. No, but when I, no, no, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:52:24 To me, that's the bad ass way. that's the bad ass way to write critically. What kind of movies do you hate? Like is there a type of kind like this? Like for me, like, I will watch romantic comedy. Sometimes I only want to watch a romantic comedy, but I, I do find them. They try my patients. And I, I don't, I don't have a lot of respect. I do find them, they try my patients. And I don't have a lot of respect. It's a very, you know, I mean,
Starting point is 00:52:50 I guess the old school ones with like, Spencer Tracy. Oh, clinical baritone, Catherine Hepburn, I mean, were they great? Were they, were they, No, there's some, well, the ones that are really funny, kind of fall more into the category of screwball comedy, which is where the romantic comedy
Starting point is 00:53:07 that they came from. But it's always a man and a woman, right? Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, and there's a flirtation and there's like, I mean, like it happened one night and- Well, that's a good example of one, bringing a baby is another good example of one. What, the Streisand, Ryan O'Neill movie,
Starting point is 00:53:23 a great- What's a doc, yeah. Is that a remake of a- No, it's not a remake. But it is a tribute. Yeah, it's kind of a paraphrase remake. All right. That's a-
Starting point is 00:53:35 Social genre and so on and so forth. It's a paraphrase remake of the movie Bringing A Baby. Right. And what- Carrey Grant? Yeah, Carrey Grant and- And Karen Hepburn. And Jimmy Stewart. Yeah. Oh no and Karen Hepburn. And Jimmy Stewart.
Starting point is 00:53:45 Oh no, that's Philadelphia. No, that's Philadelphia. Right. But the thing is, like a paraphrase remake is like the relationship that Dressa Kill has with Psycho. Oh. All right. Where it's like, okay, so it's not a remake of Psycho.
Starting point is 00:53:58 I see. But. Right. There's no way you're watching Dressa Kill and not thinking about Psycho. Right. But the director knows that you're watching Dressa Killin, not thinking about Psycho. But the director knows that you're watching Dressa Killin thinking about Psycho. I think it's- So he can actually hit Psycho points because you're on the same wavelength now.
Starting point is 00:54:15 And now he's kind of remaking the movie without remaking it, just doing his own twist on it. I think it's called a rip off. But- No, no, no, no, no, and when it's that done, when it's done like that, there's a rip off. Right, right, you know what I- Dressa Killin Psycho. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,'ve always said, no, everything has to be kind of harvested and taken. Absolutely. I mean, it's all about entertaining people. There is no business, right? Well, well, now, okay, okay, but now, you know, but now, well, okay, but now, you're in
Starting point is 00:54:58 the one profession where that's actually not the case because everybody, every comedian, it's very strong about their jokes. No, I came up with this. I came up with this routine. I came up with this bit. But in movies, I feel like... And any of them... No, no, no, there is latitude, I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:55:15 But you're in a thing where there is no latitude. No, there's no latitude. You're right. You have to keep getting laughs. That's true. You can fumfer around a lot more in almost any other. No, but you can't take a good joke from somebody
Starting point is 00:55:28 and like no, and you can't do that either. Even if you say it differently in a cool way, and I think a better way, it's no, that's his joke. Right. But does that bother you? Are they're like, oh, wow, man, I wish I had that joke because I could fucking kill with that joke. No.
Starting point is 00:55:48 No, I never, I mean, there are jokes you think, oh, I wish I could have written that, but the good jokes for you are ones that other people couldn't do. That's why they're the best ones for you. I mean, the best jokes in my act now, I just did a special and we typed it not on yet, sent on in April in Miami.
Starting point is 00:56:09 And the most satisfying jokes are character jokes. I remember when I did my first series, Gary David Goldberg, the producer, he said, you know, like the sixth episode, he said, wow, you did great tonight because that laugh you got, that was a character laugh, that's usually a second season laugh, you know, when the audience knows who the character is. So if I say something like this is lying in my act about like, now I've never been one to make fun of religion, huge laugh. I mean, it's only a laugh because they know me for a long time and they know how I think. Okay, that's not something I'm going to have at 35. Yeah, right on. You know, I mean, we all know you talked
Starting point is 00:56:54 about it on your show actually about how, you know, worth, you know, look, you've lived a long time in comedy and you talked about it. Hey, look, it's cool, show me over at the theater, knowing that these are people who could do anything in the world they wanted to do. And they decided to see me tonight. Right. Right. No, they know who I am. Nothing. They've got a ticket.
Starting point is 00:57:14 Right. This is a big night out for them. Right, babysitter. Yeah, man. This is a good audience. This is a good audience. They like me so much. They're like this. They pre-liked me.
Starting point is 00:57:25 Yeah. There's something like being pre-liked. And there's nothing like the opposite when you're starting as a standup. It's the hardest thing I spent at least 10 years struggling with the first moments, you know, as opposed to, oh, we like you. And it's just like, how do you break the ice
Starting point is 00:57:44 and like communicate to people? So for 10 years, you were at least. At least. At least. You know, probably more. Yes, it was a big struggle that you're opening line. I think my opening line when I first started was, I'm from the east, like, I get my, it's been like Japan, you know, I mean, I was like, it was like a, the Osaka area, you know, I mean, I was a, you know, you're just, yeah, you're surviving.
Starting point is 00:58:13 Well, just, you know, you're surviving and like it worked. It communicated something about me. I'm from the East, you know, and it wasn't, it didn't offend anyone, which was certainly a problem I had. I probably still do have, but, oh, I forgot what we were talking about. Like it was so important. This is what we're talking about. Look at that. I'm just imagining, like, you're the piano player playing the playing, playing you on. The piano player playing you on. The piano player is playing you on. You say that line. Like I'm working in Burlesque. Yes, Quentin. The piano player is playing me on. The comedy store, there's a piano player who plays you off and it got. Yes. And I follow the stripper. I just come
Starting point is 00:58:58 up with some bullshit that's what they do. It's a comedy store. It is. Okay, so you're right. I'm catcher rising star. That's exactly. I was making it in a side joke. No, it's true. I know, I'm sorry. But it's like, when I started, like catcher rising star was my main club. And it was about, I mean, it's not,
Starting point is 00:59:19 the whole club is about the size of this room. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, it was a small stage, but they didn't have a piano. And Richard Belzer was the big, I mean, Richard Belzer was an amazing, and if he still wanted to get up and do it tomorrow, he would be an amazing stand-up comedian. Oh, absolutely.
Starting point is 00:59:35 If he could prove to you. Yeah, I know. Right, okay. So he would like jump on the piano. And this is the fact that there was a piano. Men, he could like do so many different things because you could do musical bits. Oh, yeah, yeah. I mean, he actually, it's funny because now that Bob Dylan is 80, one of Belzer's bits was Bob Dylan as an old man. A month upon the time, you dressed so fine,
Starting point is 01:00:01 you threw the bumps at time, then you, Mr. Bigshot, you know, which was funny because Bob Dylan was 30. Yeah, right. That's the F- And now that he's actually 80, it's not so fucking funny. It's just not so fucking funny. I truly believe, you know,
Starting point is 01:00:19 I'm not depressed by age, but I do find it the most fascinating topic. Because we evolve, we change, we go through these passages. I mean, like, you were like the rock star of 1994, which we don't want to talk about in great detail. But obviously, that's not where you are. Now, in order to, would you want to be? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:43 Right. I mean, you're married. Yeah. And what's with the, you're not, in Israel, you are now, or in order to, would you want to be? Yeah. Right. I mean, you're married. Yeah. And what's with the, you're not in Israel, you are in Israel? Well, no, no, no, no, it's like we've, we've, we've got homes in Los Angeles and we have a home in Tel Aviv. So about half and half?
Starting point is 01:00:56 Yeah, well, the, the, that's the perfect solution. The idea is half and half. The world keeps conspiring against us to stop that though, because it's like, Oh, you have a summer home in Kiev. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, he's talking, yeah. Oh, no, no, he's too. He's actually no, he's totally talking. Did they talk it? Yeah, they're really? Yeah. What did they say? I bet nothing interesting. Well, it's, it's really, what's interesting about him was, he had a little kid stories with you. Yeah. No, I know not to do that. Very hard. But there isn't was an interesting thing about when he wasn't talking how well
Starting point is 01:01:52 he was getting his point across, how well he was making himself understood. How? You know, like a lot of whole lot of pointing, a whole lot of uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh. Like Chaplin, yeah. A Master of Panama. Yeah, but like uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh It was interesting actually to like, oh well, I really kind of know what he wants. I really kind of know what he's thinking about. And then actually then to hear the first group of words that he starts saying, because those first groups of words, they're not just random words. No, he is learning these words to be understood. But none of this happens right in the first year.
Starting point is 01:02:39 Not really. First year is just a puddle of muleing, puking, liquid, and like bodily functions, right? I mean, I'm not that we blame the child for that, but I mean, it just is what it is, right? That's really only the first four months. Four months? Yeah, he's...
Starting point is 01:03:00 Well, they're not potty trained at five months. They're not potty trained. Well, my son's not potty trained at all. Well, to me, there's either potty trained or I'm wiping your shit for you. I mean, there's no middle ground there. No, what is potty trained? It's just like, okay, get in the car.
Starting point is 01:03:13 All right. You're not gonna run, you're not gonna earn one. Are they potty trained at two? No, they're usually potty trained like around two and a half. Have you thought about a doggy door? They, you know, they could just go out on their own, take care of their business. I mean, if the dog can fucking learn to do it,
Starting point is 01:03:28 why can't your fucking get learned to go? So what, no, no, no. We're not even dealing with it. Yeah. What, what, what year does the, do they go to the bathroom on their own? That would be the key. I think, I think that's, no, I think that's,
Starting point is 01:03:42 I think that's normally around a year, two and a half. So you're doing us too late for me to have goods? You don't just say yes. Yes. To plainly. Nor do I have any desire to do that. Well, no, it's interesting because I've well, because me and you were in the same boat
Starting point is 01:04:05 for a really long period of time. I'm sorry to time. So I would imagine, you know, so like, I, the time of time I would imagine you having a conversation with me about this subject. Why? Well, because I just kind of know where you're coming from on it. And I know where I was coming from on it.
Starting point is 01:04:21 And if you were going to talk to me about it. I'd be honest about it. Yeah, yeah, exactly, yeah. Yeah. And it's really interesting because I just, I had heard all the stuff before and about, oh, once you have a kid that's the most important thing in the world and that I don't know.
Starting point is 01:04:40 And I don't know, it's kind of like, well, no, I don't want it to be the most important thing in the world. I got shit to do. I got fucking movies in Vegas. I don't want this fucking kid to be the most important thing in the world. Right, I'm so glad to hear you say that. Oh, or is that, are you just quoting your mind?
Starting point is 01:04:56 No, I'm saying that's real. I'm hoping that's real. No, that's completely real. That's why I waited so long, all right, before I did it. I give you a 1942. Can you stand it? Yeah, yeah, I actually Hate to have you slumming away from whatever that other No, no worries. That's not slumming. You're actually bringing me up. Oh, guys. Okay Well, I mean like see you cross the bridge that most people do at some point, that I've
Starting point is 01:05:29 never even approached, you know, which I'm just about the desire, you know, to, it's just, it's, I don't think there's anything more basic, because I certainly know a lot of guys who were total players, even when they were with someone married or otherwise players. But when it came to being a dad, they took it so serious. And that's really what it was about. The desire for a child was more than the desire for a mate. Well, it was interesting because I had a period in the early 2000s where I was like, totally had
Starting point is 01:06:11 the heat. You have the friend that you have that has a kid, you're like way too involved thinking about that kid. You think that comes from having a hard scrap of childs with a beer own? No, I think that was just this period. It was a period where I could work. What doesn't that come from having a hard, scrap-o-chile to the Bureau. No, I think that was, it was just this period. It was a period like, What doesn't that come from somewhere like that? No, I think it was, I think it was that period of life.
Starting point is 01:06:32 I mean, I mean, I didn't have a, I had to leave it to beaver upbringing. You did not. Not necessarily. Right, you were not leave it to beaver. I was leaving. You're drilling my thought. I'm drilling my file.
Starting point is 01:06:41 I'm going to finish it. So it's like, yeah. Oh. That's my job. So the, you know, it was like I had this, you know, this baby fever and, and, and then all of a sudden, after like a year or two years, and like during that period of time, I was like, hey, if the waitress at the Mexican restaurant if she ends up getting pregnant, well, I guess that's just how it's supposed to be. Really? All right. If I'm not was trying to make that happen, but I think I know that, right?
Starting point is 01:07:13 Yeah, yeah, yeah. But if it were to happen, if it were to happen, okay, well, I guess that's the way that restaurant that you like. That's the way it's supposed to be. But then the fever broke. Really? Then the fever broke. That's odd. And then I remember telling that to Howard Stern, and then the fever broke and I was like, well, good. Good for you, right? And then I had another 20 years or so.
Starting point is 01:07:38 Yeah. And then, and then, well, but then, but then, yeah, exactly. Yeah, that came because it was the right woman. And it was the right situation. And it was the right time. Everything was right. It was not too personal as such a lifelong bachelor. How did, like, what was it that went in your mind? Like, oh, this is the right person.
Starting point is 01:08:00 Like, this is the different element I've been waiting for. I think it was the, it's well, well asked question, the way you put it. I think there's two things I think if there's her and I think there's something else. I think maybe two or three years earlier, I was like, okay, if I meet the right girl, I might be ready now for something like this. If it now with a word to happen, or before I might have put the brakes on, now I might not put the brakes on so much. Now
Starting point is 01:08:44 I'm very open to it. And then I even had a couple of girlfriends in that time. I was like, is this the one? Is this the one? They weren't, but just even the fact that I was open to the idea. I'm just very glad to find out that you had this memorable bachelor because like you, your image is sort of like this nerdy guy who's like to a hunker down, writing the screenplay at swingers to actually enjoy your success. I'm so glad to be finding out that you did enjoy your success because you, you, you, you, I mean, I remember thinking that. And then one time, I don't remember what you're this was.
Starting point is 01:09:21 Don't ask me these clove cigarettes are crazy. But like you were, it was some award show party, this town really only parties during awarding. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And there was some events, and I saw you getting into a limo at the end of the event with some very hot Hollywood actress who was looked to be quite a neighbor,
Starting point is 01:09:45 he had it and I thought, oh good. He deserves that, you know, just for Jackie Brown, which always one of my favorites. Oh, thank you, me. That one really got me. Because it was more of a story and less of violence. Yeah. You know, and I always thought like you, you sometimes underestimate yourself and then like, no, almost no violence until the end of, and then it's so much fun. Well, but, you know, because you're highlighting
Starting point is 01:10:23 violence a little bit too much. I mean, there's like highlighting slap the comedy, depending on who you're talking about, depending on if you're talking about Blake Edwards, or somebody like that, where it's like, it's an element that people make a big deal about, and it's one of the things that I do well, but it's nothing to be rationed or, it's nothing to be rationed or over-indulged. It's a simple, it's an element.
Starting point is 01:10:51 I don't know about that. I wouldn't, you know. I mean, as a viewer, I don't know if I could sign on to that. I think it can be rationed. I don't think there's not one movie of yours where I would take out one frame of it, but because that's the movie Because it's like Totally Context is every totally appropriately builds up to it. Yeah, like I felt like again
Starting point is 01:11:15 I would have felt cheated if there wasn't like the Manson Lingson reverse at the end of the Hollywood. I would yeah, and And also it was just as as always, just entertainingly done. I think we began talking about earlier, just entertain people. You know, just fucking entertain people. Well, I mean, like you entertain people. I might give the, I might give the lily too much if I'm making my movies too long, but the, you know, but you know.
Starting point is 01:11:42 But they're entertaining. Well, that's one of the things I know. I'm coming from an entertain the audience point of view. Exactly. I know you are. So am I. I always do what's best for the audience. You know, I mean, there are some people who are like,
Starting point is 01:11:56 you know, I never fired a writer. Well, I fired plenty. Yeah. Not because I'm a bad guy, because the audience comes first. Yeah. You gotta, that's what we're doing. Is, why are we here? You know, it was like,
Starting point is 01:12:12 I was reading a book that was, I had this director and a famous director. I was talking, and they were talking about how, obviously it's from the 70s, and how he was taxing on the crew because he was trying to make a really terrific movie. And look, and he can be wrong
Starting point is 01:12:31 and he can be misguided or whatever, but he's trying to make a really terrific movie. And he's a num director, but there's a reality in this business. And that is, this business makes a lot of material. They shoot a lot of shows. Yeah. It's not the job to just put people in employment.
Starting point is 01:12:52 Some of the times, the people in employment are working to a higher purpose, to make something bigger than themselves. Hopefully, and they can be wrong, and we can all be wrong. But in some cases, that's a movie. That is, usually you get that from a crew. Unless you're working on a piece of shit. However, if you don't want to be held to that kind of exacting fenders, you can make the
Starting point is 01:13:17 $6 million man. You can make hardcastle on the corn mack. Now you've got to far, my friend. Because those jobs are out there. That is the industry is built on those jobs. Oh, yes. So if you want to work at that level. I always say.
Starting point is 01:13:35 But you can't work at that level when you're working with certain people who are trying to push the envelope of the art. There's no shame in living in the valley, and there's no shame in taking detective work on CBS. Yes. If you believe that, you can succeed in this town. I was just talking to your guys before I came on. You're picking up like I'm Elvis.
Starting point is 01:14:04 Elvis, Elvis, Elvis. Yeah, it's funny and rare. Yeah, me and Red West were having a talk. Red West. So I mentioned being politically incorrect back in the comedy Central Days. And I actually was able to remember every single one of my guests on the round table, except for one.
Starting point is 01:14:25 Okay, so well, I don't know. Okay, but I maybe you can remember. Okay, so, okay, I remember the first one. Jimmy Walker. No, no, that would have been awesome. All right, no, the first one was Dick Clark. Dick Clark. That's Dick Clark.
Starting point is 01:14:43 Jerry's Mark. Dick Clark. Jerry Clark. Dick Clark. Corbin Burenson. No. Corbin Burenson. Oh, I love it. And Margaret Smith.
Starting point is 01:14:51 Who's that? The Santa comedian, Margaret Smith. Oh, yes. I thought you was a senator. This is like... Okay, so that was the first one. Oceans ago. Okay, so that was the first one.
Starting point is 01:15:02 The second one, okay, I can remember two of them, but I can't remember the third one. It was Jimmy Walker. I know it wasn't Jimmy Walker. Again, I wish, and it would have been better for the show if it was. It was me, Jeanine Carofelow.
Starting point is 01:15:18 Well, I love her. And what's the guy who is the host of Lifesides Robin Leach? Oh, I'm so 90s. Robin Leach. I can't remember who the... Is this still with us, Robin Leach? I don't know. But I was actually also saying that there was a moment where I had a codal...
Starting point is 01:15:44 Oh, wow. This is a 70s talk show moment. Right. Because look, I grew up like coming home from school and going and watching Dynastore and Mike Douglas, you know, when I got home. I'm telling you, whoever I liked, you know. When you lent your stamp of approval to our little politically incorrect show with the point 02 rating. It was like the, I'm telling you, it was the shot in the arm at that staff. We dined on that.
Starting point is 01:16:12 That's awesome. It's like, what was written so into you? You knew how excited I truly was when I bumped into you guys. When you were at the Rockstar Director at that moment. So that the Rockstar Director liked our little show. I'm sure that's why the New York Times wrote their little point out too. Well, I look at it and I look at it.
Starting point is 01:16:30 I gotta say, right at that time, you guys, it was like I put it in a light with a wet hand. You know, all right. I was like, I really, I'll tell you something really interesting that says so much about our culture. I think. When I started doing that show in 1993, the big worry about it, the big critique was, you can't do a show where the host tells you his political opinions, because that was
Starting point is 01:16:59 what the template always was. He didn't know Johnny Carson's political opinions. Even into Letterman and Leno. They didn't really ever, they sort of, Leno, I don't know, maybe he's a Republican. He played it straight down the middle, that's how they all did it. So when I was like saying no, I think the public can fucking withstand it if they don't agree with me. They just got gotta like you. And it was true. Now, you can't be a late night host
Starting point is 01:17:30 unless they do know your opinion. Exactly, yeah. And it's all about that. It's not about being funny. It's about saying the correct opinion for the audience you're working for. So it's completely flipped. I've heard you talk about it.
Starting point is 01:17:44 That's pretty interesting. I've heard you talk about it. That's pretty interesting. I've heard you talk about on your show, The Gutfeld Show. But talk to me more in detail. What do you think about him per se? I mean, we did a bit on that. I don't remember talking about it because honestly, I don't know it. But I know what it is. I know what it is. Enough to do a bit about it, which I remember was very funny. I can't know it, but I know what it is. I know what it is. I have to do a bit about it, which I remember was very funny. Can't remember what that joke's word, but it was good.
Starting point is 01:18:11 I mean, have you watched a couple episodes of the show? No, but what's... You haven't watched it. You haven't even, too? Not two seconds. Not two seconds. No. That's why we didn't do a bit on it.
Starting point is 01:18:23 It's an issue on it. We did a bit. The bit was based on the idea that it was out doing some other shows, and it was a conservative comedy show. Now, I've talked about this subject many times because I've been asked many times. Why doesn't conservative comedy work? The answer is, again, indicative, I think, of the times we live in. It didn't work in the past because liberals weren't doing anything funny enough to make fun of.
Starting point is 01:18:50 And I would use the example of Dennis Miller, who I have the greatest admiration for as a comedian. I think he's a state-of-the-art kind of craftsman when he does his thing. But he went hard-right with his thing. But he went hard right with his politics. And so he was doing bits about how, you know, Nancy Pelosi, at a moment in history when Sarah Palin was giving people on the left tons of material because she was an idiot. Nancy Pelosi is not an idiot, so it rang hollow. Yeah. They didn't have anything to work with. Greck Gutfield is working now.
Starting point is 01:19:32 There's something to work from. Yeah, I mean, the Trumpers rose gonna be the worst. The Republicans don't believe in environment or democracy, so fuck them. But the left is goofy in a lot of ways. So there is material now for someone like Rick Gutfield to work with. Maybe he's doing it and I'm missing it,
Starting point is 01:19:55 but I'm going by what they say in my writer producer meeting. And they're like, you know, it's also the fact that conservatives just not fucking got a comedy. Well, yeah, that's the punchline. They're also just not good at comedy. Because they have material. They have like It has the feeling of it does have a feeling of the witch McCullough at the wallet George show. All right. But that's actually instant here because there is a.
Starting point is 01:20:34 I want to talk about his show for that much on the show. Oh, I don't care. No, but I like that much work in starting that we're out of pot. I think I know we're out of pot. I think I know where, oh good. Are you done with this? No, I'm good with that. Can we share this? Yeah, we can share.
Starting point is 01:20:51 You're not like paranoid about the fucking virus, are you? No, no, no, no. Oh good. The Oscar party is Sunday. Yeah. Are you going? I'm going to the Governor's Awards. What's that? That's that. I'm stuffy. No, no, no, no, no, it's for the give the lifetime achievement awards.
Starting point is 01:21:12 Are you getting a lifetime achievement? No, no, same tax in the house. Oh, I'm so, oh, he deserves one. And you did so much for him. But it's a good thing. I cool. Like among your other credits, career reviver. I mean, that is like your Metier, right? For a while anyway, that was Jackson and Travolta, the dude in Jackie Brown. Robert Forster, yeah. He said he was in lots of movies after this. Is he still with it? He just, you know, he passed he said he was in lots of movies after that. Yeah, is he still with it? He just you know, he passed away a couple years ago. Oh, okay
Starting point is 01:21:49 Now, but he was like no, he was doing he was doing straight to video movies and so it's a really great power Yeah, it was like a among powers like I could you know Well, okay, you're career. Well now be resurrected That's a great- Well, it was interesting. Well, it was a hallmark of the fan place I was coming from. I'm like, I know who these actors are because I'm watching those exploitation movies that those guys are doing.
Starting point is 01:22:19 But the point being though is, I remember way after I did Jackie Brown maybe sometime before Kill Bill. I was in being on some sort of an air flight with some famous well-known film finance here. You know, the international guy who puts together a guy in a wheelchair. Yeah, somebody like, but you know, not a guy who puts together- I don't know, I'm not sure. Yeah, somebody like- But not a guy like him who usually is coming to Art First, but a less Art First kind of fellow. But that's the same idea. And it goes-
Starting point is 01:22:57 Darnitina, let me ask you a question. Um, now everything is said and done. Do you wish when I came to Jackie Brown that you had not have done it with Pam Gray and Robert Forster, but if you had hired bigger stars? Do you? Why was that even a question? Well, because it's like it could have been bigger. I see, I see. I see. And I go, well, you know,
Starting point is 01:23:31 we made $30 million with the movie starring Pam Gray and Robert Forster. I thought that was actually pretty fucking good. But his point though goes, well, that's all you. Good, well great. Yeah. Great, yes, okay. I can make a movie with Pam Grier, Robert Forster, and I can do well because I made it. Well, that's the reason to be fucking famous.
Starting point is 01:23:58 Right, because you're our rock star director, that's true. But like, let me ask you, this is 1997, who would have been the stars of the day in that year if you wanted to, you know, star funk cast it? Like, who would they suggest it? Like, Robert Foster, who would have been in 1997? Who would have been that 45-year-old? In 1997, no, I'll tell you exactly.
Starting point is 01:24:24 It would have been Angela Bassett and Robert Jderon. I gotta say, I think this guy's got a point. I think he's got a fucking point. Thank you, God, I'm fucking point. I hate to say it. I love you so much, but I think this guy's got a fucking point. No, I mean, I love it as it is. And Pam Greer was the right choice and reviving her career.
Starting point is 01:24:50 And you know, you got her like she was still hot. Yeah. Yeah. You know, that was kind of important. Well, and yeah, yeah. Yeah. No, very true. But she's still hot after that entire period of time, and she was still hot and she was still the
Starting point is 01:25:10 same woman. She was still the same- What was she in like in the day like, like Dolomite? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, like, yeah, but you're picking like the lowliest. You mean that one? You mean that one? You mean that one? I remember walking on 42nd Street in New York City when it was the porn Yeah, district that also had and there was like movies like black Hitler, Fiora of Harlem.
Starting point is 01:25:44 Like crazy. Crazy. Just like a crazy, crazy, crazy. I know a death. Yeah. The tongue thawed. Just crazy shit. But that was that error that Chinese like, I mean, Eddie Murphy just made that movie about Don't Like That. It was terrific, you know, and it was like that was a genre.
Starting point is 01:26:04 Okay, it's okay. Pam Grishen, please, we're better than it was like that was a genre. Okay, so okay. Pam Grishnell, please, we're better than that. It's ever better than Donaline. What did she do? She did a coffee and coffee. Coffee, yeah, right. Coffee, the color coffee, because she'll cream you. Is that right?
Starting point is 01:26:15 Is that right? Is that the tagline? You can't write that. Yeah, no one in the sleep's from the message. I agree. Coffee. Somebody did write that. Somebody did write that, which is sadder.
Starting point is 01:26:27 And then it's an official sequel, Foxy Brown. Because it was actually- Foxy Brown, of course. Because Foxy Brown was written as a sequel to coffee, because the original script for Foxy Brown was Burn and Coffee Burn. Come on. Yeah, that was original title. But then Sam Arco, who also did,
Starting point is 01:26:48 the sequel to the Blackyla, did the sequel to the McConnola. He was like, No, it's the plot. Seekles are not doing good right now. What was the plot of Blackyla? Oh, well, I remember the plot. Well, share it.
Starting point is 01:27:04 Okay, the plot was an African prince. And the African prince is, of course, and is, and is, Brian. Is there any other kind of African prince? And African prince is Brian. Visit Transylvania. Transylvania. Why would they be going to Romania?
Starting point is 01:27:25 I'm explaining. Because the wealthy landowner there, Count Draquhue, wants to possibly buy some land in Africa. Why? That's all we've be discussing the dinner. So they have the dinner and then at some point Dracula gets too forward with black coolas brides. So typical. And a thing happens and Dracula bites Blackula, kills the bride.
Starting point is 01:28:06 But by Blackula says you will be forever cursed. I will give you my name, Blackula. And now you are a vampire, you will live for the next 500 years. But like Lenny locks him up and so he's like in a coffin for like hundreds and hundreds of years until they unearthed Dracula's castle. And then they send his coffin to New York. Hundreds of years. Yes. Like, yes, not like he's running around. He's he's trapped. He's made a vampire. Then he's trapped in the coffin for that period of time.
Starting point is 01:28:45 Until the 70s when he's at loose. Like the day the clown cried. That's not the same thing. Well, I'm just saying we're only going to get to see it like in hundreds of years. Right. I actually asked Jerry Lewis about this. But he's dead. No, I know.
Starting point is 01:29:04 But when he was alive, I brought up to him. I brought up to Dave the Clown Pride. And did you see it? No, I'm seeing it. Okay, well that's the thing. No, but I asked him about it. Tell the audience what that is.
Starting point is 01:29:16 What today the Clown Pride, okay? I wanna hear your audience, okay, yeah. I wanna hear you explain the day they clowned. You do it. I'm tired. It is, it, Jared Lewis did a, did a movie in the 70s
Starting point is 01:29:34 that was about a Jew who was turned into a, a children's clown in Auschwitz to lead the children to the gas showers. Now I got to interrupt and ask, was there any historical reason to think that the Nazis employed a clown to march the children to the dead? Why? to march the children to the kids. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, else. Well, also, we'll be at high issues with it. You can have issues with it, but just keep it in the ball.
Starting point is 01:30:27 I'm just saying, we talked about three other movies tonight that were stupid. We thought the premise was stupid. You just say that, it's Joe Lewis. It is kind of stupid to think that the Nazis would be like, we are the meanest people who ever lived, but let's get a cloud to help with children. I mean, just, I'm gonna thought about it that much.
Starting point is 01:30:52 It's not in there, it's not in their profile. Now look, there's so many like things that I started that I really wanted to finish. It was a good conversation. I know, but I feel like I feel like. I felt that hanging conversations are. know, but I feel like I can't hang out conversations are. Yeah, but it is just shying. I disagree that there's any goal.
Starting point is 01:31:12 I don't think there's any goal left dug in the ground. I think I don't think the idea is to dig through the Earth's core. I think the idea is to hop from flower to flower to flower. Am I wrong? To me, look, I'm a fucking Irish drunk. I could do this for like four more hours with you, not with a lot of people, but I could do it with you. But yes, I guess we should wrap it up.
Starting point is 01:31:38 But no, I just felt like there was so many things we started, I was like, oh, now that I have him here. But that's, you come back, you know, this is Club random. You got to have like, it's like, I was saying to Judd, one of the bad things about success is you get so wrapped up in your own work, you don't see your friends enough. And like when I started out in comedy, I saw Jerry Seinfeld and Paul Reiser and Larry Miller
Starting point is 01:32:11 and Carol Liefer and Lunt Richard Bealser every day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. For three, four years. I saw them every night. And now I never see them. Or I see them a few times a year when we have dinner or whatever, you know? But it's like, because we all like want to work.
Starting point is 01:32:29 Like, always work and now we're working. And so like, no, it's weird because, no, it's, in a weird way, this is the only way I can get you here. No, I guess it is. So I talked to you in the same way I would normally. Yeah. But what I want to do. Yeah, you know.
Starting point is 01:32:44 Well, that's really nice. Well, look, I look, I got it. Okay, look, I didn't know you felt that way because I remember, the time I went to see you after the show, I went and saw you in Austin. Do you remember that? Yeah. Okay. Absolutely. So you had a little like after the show, me, it was me and one of the Dixie chicks. Not only. Yeah. And so- Love her, love her.
Starting point is 01:33:09 Yeah. So she was there and she had just going through her big thing. Right. With George Bush. Yeah. So that was going on. And I was there and I was there with my lady and- My lady. My lady. She with my lady. And my lady.
Starting point is 01:33:25 My lady. My lady. She was my lady. My lady. Cuffin broccoli. You know what I'm talking about, all right? Well, yeah. No, what you're talking about, it's fine.
Starting point is 01:33:38 All right. And, but the thing is, okay, what you didn't know. What you didn't know. Jesus. No, no, no. I was like, the Austin dude then. I had like been there for a while and I had like these film festivals there.
Starting point is 01:33:55 And so I knew this club and this bar and the lady I was with had everything hooked up. So I just thought we were gonna hang out. But you kind of just treated it like it was like an after show. Hello, how are you? Now I'm gonna go hit the town fuck off. Not in a bad way. What year was this? What was this? 2000. 2000? 2003. I mean just so odd. 2002. I mean, I- No, no, no, no, no, I take that back. 2000 and like...
Starting point is 01:34:32 Six. Wow. Well, first of all, I'm sorry. I don't- I can't imagine it's like, you just didn't fucking know. You weren't hip to it, all right? All I can think of is that for some reason, because like, by 2006,
Starting point is 01:34:52 I had like, let's go to this place, that place, this place. But see, that was not communicated to me. So nice, nice, nice happens. Like, I have had this happen where, like, I wouldn't say the person's name, but a giant movie star at a certain, never enough that long ago. And they said to me, he wants to, I'm playing Vegas.
Starting point is 01:35:12 When he wants to come see you in Vegas, I said, great, I love X. And, but we want you to know that he's just going to come back, he's with a friend, he's just going to come back for five minutes. I'm like, fine, I'm just, great, I can set him up with, it's five minutes, no minutes. Whatever he wants to do. I couldn't get him out of my dressing room. Yeah. I've been like an hour after I do it.
Starting point is 01:35:38 I'm just saying, people just are always full of shit about communicating. I remember my friend Martin Lewis tell me the story about Pete Townsend played as a solo wife, but still he's the who. Yeah, yeah. Okay, the house of blues is a small room and he's backstage after and no one comes back.
Starting point is 01:36:01 And he thinks, oh my show must have sucked, they hated me. And he finds out after, no, security kept everyone away. I've had that happen. It's like, you know, like people will lie to you, keep people away from you. So I don't know what happened in 2003. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, that's about it.
Starting point is 01:36:20 Now I get to finish my point. OK. I don't know what happened in 2006. But it's, my guess is it's a combination of that, not communicating that Quentin Tarantino wanted to actually go out with you. Yeah, right on. Because I didn't, I don't think I would,
Starting point is 01:36:35 if I had known that even by shallow standards, I would have taken that offer up. I'm not, that's what I thought. I'm not, that's what I'm thinking. I don't think, I don't think, I don't think, I don't think it's about that offer up. That's what I thought. That's what I thought. I don't think it's about that. Okay. The other like, flying the white man could be pussy.
Starting point is 01:36:56 In some way, I don't remember it so long ago. I don't know, you could have had a girl. No, I'm, who was demanding I go out with just that? That's what my girl said. Okay. That's what my girl said. I think a lot of my life I could have been that guy.
Starting point is 01:37:15 That was what my girl said. I think he had it in a point. It said. Yeah. It said. On my part, but I will admit that totally could have been it. So I've- She could have rolled with us, I would have had fun.
Starting point is 01:37:31 I know. But you didn't know, you didn't know. I mean, some girls don't want to roll with us. No, I understand that. You know, it's like- No, I'm just thinking about- I don't remember. No, it actually just also shows my so king of Austin vibe at that moment at least as far as myself.
Starting point is 01:37:48 I love Austin. Right. That I just actually naturally assumed that you know. But yeah, no, I mean, yeah, so I was I'm acting like I'm Matthew McConaughey. All right. What? Maybe the world doesn't fucking know, right? The locals know, that wasn't it.
Starting point is 01:38:10 That wasn't it. That wasn't it. That wasn't it. You were like the rock star director for like over a decade. Even like, I guess I say on a superficial level, I would have been all over that. It must have, I'm not knowing, but thinking it must have been that latter subject I brought up.
Starting point is 01:38:30 It must have been some way that I was restricted from doing what I wanted. Because that was still a year when that would have been something I was subjected to. There are a lot of bad things about aging, but one of the great fucking things is not doing shit you don't want to do almost ever. Yeah, yeah. The bad part is that whole you'll be dead sooner thing, but the part about I don't do shit, I don't want to do ever, that priceless. Well, okay, look, okay, so now you're actually nailing exactly how it was because the reason
Starting point is 01:39:06 it wasn't explained beforehand, because it just would be sexier if, as we're talking, it just reveals itself, what are you doing? All right, oh, well, it just so happens that, the thaw, all right, you know, well, that's gonna be more exciting. That's gonna know, well, that's going to be more exciting. That's going to be sexy. And that's going to be everything.
Starting point is 01:39:27 All the whole idea was it was just as we were talking. And now we're going to all go out. What's going to happen? It would be very hard to give it anything. Yeah. So fucking butt. All right. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:39:41 But the fact that you were putting the brakes on that kind of conversation suggested a woman. Yes, a woman appointment. A woman. A woman. Yeah. Which is not putting it on, it's putting it on me for like being someone who was like, you know, I mean, probably had a better time with her than you would have with me. Not necessarily. Not necessarily. That's just to mean not, because that's not a cool woman. A woman who kept me from Quentin Tarantino. Well, who is that a cool woman?
Starting point is 01:40:17 It's not a cool woman. But I must admit that we're still a year, I probably was susceptible to making that ill-fated choice. And I wish I could go back in time. First of all, take care of the whole Hitler thing. And then I'd fucking definitely save Lincoln. I would probably do something about Jesus Christ, although that would be controversial, because like some people, I mean, if he had lived forever,
Starting point is 01:40:49 what would be worrying around our next? Nothing. Yeah, right, exactly. I hate to say it, but, you know, God had a plan for his son who was really him. Yes. I mean, there's something suspicious about that, whole of religious theory.
Starting point is 01:41:03 I have a son, he's really me. Okay, but you know, that was one of the things I thought that was actually so, that I like so much and religious, and I like that you went back on it and like highlighted it. You almost footnoted it, is when the Jesus guy at the camp. Yes, love him. All right, said the thing about, well, it's like holy land. Holy land, it's a holy musman part, holy land.
Starting point is 01:41:35 Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's like, well, how can somebody be the father the holy ghost? Holy ghost, well, it's sort of like water, it can be steam, it can be steam, it can be ice, it can be liquid, yeah. And then you guys, you're finished with your day of shooting. Right, it's the next day.
Starting point is 01:41:53 You guys go in the car or whatever, like, hey, you know, that guy had a really good point, right? Yeah, me going. We're throwing, he had me going for a minute. Yeah, we're throwing stuff at him. And that was a really good lob. I think that's why that movie did well is,
Starting point is 01:42:11 because it was not mean spirited. It wasn't mean spirited. It was not mean about religion. It was just like, help me understand. And I don't hate you for it. And maybe I could be wrong too. But in the meantime, it is going to get it talking. That was the end.
Starting point is 01:42:30 We filmed in McGeeja. Well, Bob, I mean, look, I think it's a situation. You would love it. Who knows what they care, but actually because you guys were coming from a good natured place. That, you know, any of the religious people that took part in it were treated very well. Very well. Yes.
Starting point is 01:42:54 I absolutely, we're not making fun of anybody. And that's the only way you could have done that movie. I mean, when we pitched it, it's funny because that movie could never be made today. And almost not like much before we made it, it was a perfect time with the perfect studio at the time, Lionsgate, that would do it and not pull it from the theaters.
Starting point is 01:43:17 I mean, Brad Gray used to be my manager. He had a paramount at that time. He offered and I said, yeah, but the first time you get one letter that says, we're going to boycott the next mission impossible movie, you'll fucking pull it from the theaters. I know you will, because that's who you are and that's fine. Yeah, right on.
Starting point is 01:43:37 But, and Lionsgate put it out and stood by it. I mean, it wasn't allowed to play in half the country. I mean, it wasn't allowed to play in half the country. I mean, it's great. And in any place where you couldn't get an abortion, you couldn't see that movie. Wow. Yeah. Some people traveled 300 miles to see that movie. Of course, they also needed an abortion at the same time.
Starting point is 01:44:00 I mean, they were too far. It's like, I want to get rid of this baby, and I definitely want to see this moment. There's nothing wrong with that. It's like, ah, I have the baby in the right arrow. I'm going to go back to my day job. More fun than a barrel of monkey. That was a block.
Starting point is 01:44:28 Hey, why don't you blow? So do it again. Yes, absolutely. Yes. You can't have more fun than this.

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