Club Random with Bill Maher - Trace Adkins | Club Random with Bill Maher

Episode Date: January 14, 2024

Bill and Trace Adkins on Bill’s favorite Trace song, kids calling the cops on their parents, why you have to be careful in traffic, the areas where Bill is risk averse, the perpetually persecuted grievance junkies, who caused the devastation in Trace’s Louisiana hometown, whether or not Trace ever gets tired of playing his hit songs, Trace’s love of working on oil rigs, Trace’s road from the oil fields to the stage, and the fine line between heavy drinking and addiction. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Bet on the NFL with Bandual, a Fishal Sportsfoot partner of the NFL. Download the app today to see why we're in North America's number one sportsbook. 19-plus and physically located in Ontario, gambling problem call 1866-531-2600 to visit connectsentario.ca. I mean, the drinking and the drugs, I gotta get away from the first time. Why couldn't you just do me? I don't know, I don't know why I'm walking in the add it. I love working in the whole field. I love really.

I'm on a drilling rig and don't you get loyal all over you? Not really. I mean, some days. Don't get up. I wasn't. And where are you big man? Well, where are you? You look livin' in character. Can I fix your drink? No, thank you.

You don't drink anymore at all? No, try not to. Got my heart. Yeah, yeah, you know what I don't. Not anymore. Not anymore. Yeah, you know what? That's what I got from your last record, which is great.

When you made the pandemic. Yeah. Such a good record. And it's like, it's so thoughtful and wistful about your past. And, you know, like looking back at like, yeah, I used to be in bars with whiskey on my lips, but now I got a good woman. Yeah. And so I don't need to do that.

Yeah, I'm trying to avoid that. That whole get a good woman and then, oh, then you're, yeah, you know what? Congratulations. You've done it for years. It takes you out of the bars, you know what? Congratulations. You've done it for years. It takes you out of the bars, you know? But you sounded very, I mean, it made me think you were very happy.

Man, I am. I'm in good place these days, you know? And I'm not sure where I am, but, you know, my life, eight is eight is eight is eight, I don't know where I'm at double you now, but, you know, you're doing okay. No, I mean, what are you, 60? 61. Okay, you know, look at Biden.

He's 110 and from Transylvania and he's still, he's the president of the United States and he's probably going to be running again, you know? So, and, you know, if I'm that way at 80, I'll be fine with it. He's not in bad shape. But if I'm that way at 80, I'm just gonna be doing the pelvic thrust on stage at the Grand O'Loppery,

I'm not gonna have the nuclear code. Right? It's a different thing, Bill. Yeah, it's a different thing. I mean, that's why I wouldn't want them in Trump's hands more than Biden's hands. What do you think Biden is an insane person who's gonna fire off a nuclear weapon for no reason? No, but I just... Okay.

So, Justin and I said, what? I don't even know. I don't even hardly... Oh my God, I remember being that old when I was young, my granddaddy lived to be 83 years old. He was the oldest guy that I think I'd ever known. People lived a lot longer now, right? People lived 110.

It was crazy. There was a lady who beat COVID at 103. My mother beat it three times. She's 80, something, 81. Three times? Three, she got it three times. Yeah, wow. Yeah, and she kicked it's ass.

Tough old girl. I was gonna say, wow, three times. That seems like that shouldn't happen. Like if you get it, you don't, you're having, shouldn't you have the immune, maybe her immune system is... Yeah, you know, the first time she got it was pretty rough, but then the next two times wasn't very bad.

Yeah. And yeah, she had built up that natural immunity, I suppose. You got it? I got it two times, yeah. You did? Did you get first time? I felt pretty bad for a couple of days. Had you had the vaccine?

Yeah. Really? Felt pretty bad for a couple of days and then the second time I got it, it was really nothing. I didn't. So you didn't think the vaccine had a chip in it to track you? You know what?

I just, I don't buy in the whole of that crime, you know, and I'm like, give me a vaccine for everything that you've got one for. I'll take them. I'm not scared of that. No, you've been shot in the heart. Yeah, but I mean, I'm just not, I don't think they're trying to. No, I've put something in the back seams, control us.

So, you know, me and back seam, there's definitely not, definitely not doing that. No. Or that it makes us, you know, feminine or whatever. Nah, I didn't notice that either. I have to be a hell of a vaccine to make you feminine. Well, girls love a deep voice, girls love a country boy, isn't that one of your songs?

That's absolutely right. Yeah, yeah. Well, they like a good one. I don't know what to attribute to, what all the women who threw themselves out here. I just had game, I guess, I don't know. Well, you're a singer. That's right, you don't have to even know how to speak.

It doesn't seem like, you know. It's just amazing the power of music. It's pretty crazy. And also your 10 feet tall, you know, you're kind of bigger than life. Oh, I could definitely see by the... That was a long, long time. I know. No, I'm telling you, I feel like every song I heard on your record was like all about... And I met your girl. She's great and she's Canadian right?

Yeah, yeah, because there's that one song that's about like It's a classic We shouldn't be together song It all adds up it all adds up to us like you got the GMC and she's got the whatever and to us, like, you got the GMC and she's got the whatever and the... I wrote that about her. Oh, I can tell. Yeah. So, you're gonna smoke?

I'm gonna smoke. Yeah. Oh, God, you're still smoking cigarettes? Yeah. Well, you nuts. You're like the last person in America who's smoking cigarettes in. Really? Am I wrong?

Is there a lot of people who... I don't know, I don't care. I don't care. You know. But it doesn't, you don't worry about your health with those. Yeah, sure, but. You're the only boss that I have that after I do it, I don't have to apologize to people for what I said

or what I did. So let me have this one last one, just let me have this one. And as far as weed, I mean, I always have that voice in my head when I first started trying to get sober and some of those old hard core alcoholics that had been sober for 20 years, you know, they would tell me, don't do the marijuana program to stop drinking, that's not going to work, it's not going to work. I just remember hearing that. But you never were into it. I did smoke it years ago. I would smoke it every now and then, you know. But it got to a point in my life where it made me

incredibly paranoid. That's a common effective part. But it kept, it seemed like it kept getting incrementally worse every time I do it. It would make me more and more paranoid to the point that I was just like, I don't want to go. Like any psychotropic drug you're doing, it has a lot to do with your mood.

I mean, it's what's going on in your head, and we don't know, you know, that's the bottom of the ocean, the brain, as far as like things we know about. Oh, yeah. You know, I mean, there are no more than they used to, but it's still quite a mystery and I know like I will smoke like if I smoke in a hotel room I get higher. I don't know why But it has somebody to do with my mood. I think with the psychological elements in my mind that I'm not aware of that are on the subconscious level There's something about maybe I feel like something's an environmental thing with you. I don't know, I mean, you know,

look, this is not help food either. I'm not claiming that, but I feel like- But does it hurt you? I don't know. It could. I mean, I don't think I would recommend if I was a doctor putting smoke in your lungs of any kind.

Smoke? I mean, you know, it's probably not, but you know, you got it, like you said, you got to pick your, at least with this. These chairs might be feel like I'm squatting to shit in the woods, like, you know, like, what do you,

oh, well, I wanted to make you feel at home. Oh, thanks. You asked, oh. I love you. I still like you're still in asshole. And you're probably going to get worse, so do you get. No, I will. I'm charming. I'm just, I'm charming you.

Oh yeah. Is that what you're doing? I'm recognizing. I love my redneck friends. Well, good, man. We'll keep you alive when the world comes to an end. Well, it's good to have friends on both sides. That's true.

I had a guy over here by the day. He was just a younger guy. We were on tour. He was a tour manager for somebody else, but I'd known him for a while. He recently has had a couple of kids in the last few years, and he came to me and he was concerned. I could see it on his face and he was like, I just got to ask you man, I

respect what you think about things and he said, I got kids now man, he said, I'm worried, what do you think is going to happen? And I said, it's going to get worse until it's over. Meaning what? That's so vague. It's just, it's not going to, if you're expecting all this stuff to miraculously get the craziness that we're surrounded with these things. Specifically what? There's so much of it. Well with children, you know, like if you're bringing little kids up now and, oh God. The things that are happening, you know, and it just, I could not imagine being a parent, I would be a terror.

I could not accept, I think I know what you're talking about, I just could not accept, first of all, I don't even like kids. So the fact that I'm defending them is hysterical. But I just don't think I could take losing the kind of autonomy that parents have lost over what happens with their own children. Yeah. You know, the idea of calling the cops on my mother,

I must say never occurred to me. Like it did not cross my mind. Oh, here's an option when I didn't like my parents when they were making me pissed off with them. I'll call the cops on them or report them. Or, you know, there was no resource. There's no other resources. I'll tell the teacher.

Tell the teacher. Teacher talks to them. That's what I don't think I could bear as a parent. I feel like I would want to be able to raise my kid the way I wanted to raise him. And some of the women's I got from my old man growing up, I could have called the cops. But you know what, every other guy that I grew up with could have to, all our dads were the same exact way, you know. What do you mean, could they beat you?

I'd beat you, but they'd take that belt out and put it across your ass when you needed it. You know. That's called beating. They beat you. Yeah, that ain't beating. Well, a belt on your ass is kind of a beating. I mean, I was spang.

I've had beatings too. Right. That's not a beating. Right. Right. But, you know, you're your own bar fights. You've got to be really careful these days too, you know. Get mad at somebody on the interstate or something.

Some little UFC fighter level to jump out of his Hyundai and beat the shit out of you, you know what I'm saying? Well, that's unlikely. All these kids are into the UFC now. You got to be careful. Well, that's unlikely. All these kids are into the UFC now. You got to be careful. Well, that's unlikely in the specific, but I will submit the stupidest thing you can do, I think, is ever to honk another driver if they'll ever do that. Because you don't know who's in that car. It just could be some, maybe not a UFC fighter, but just somebody who's borderline.

I mean, there's... It could be me. It could be you. Right. You don't want to do that. Right. Imagine this man mountain getting out of the car and saying, I'll laugh about it. It could be me. It could be you. Right. You don't want to do that. Right. Managing this man mountain getting out of the car and saying, I laugh about it sometimes

when somebody does give me the little tooth, you know, and I'm just like, you're so stupid. Why, because you could kill them? I don't know, but it probably wouldn't be enjoyable for them. Right. Yeah. I don't know, but the problem wouldn't be enjoyable for them. Right. Yeah. No, I am a cautious person. I will take risks, and I certainly have in my career, but there has to be a consummate

reward. It has to be a big reward. I'm not into running across the street against the light if I could save a minute, you know, or honking people or anything that's like, oh, who gives a shit? That's, you know, that's such a fake way of being brave. I mean, no brave. Just live to fight another day. Don't cause trouble. Happiness, I feel like so much of it is not just what you get, it's what you avoid. You know, avoid feuds, avoid debt.

And being in a hurry too, it's like, I never did really get in much of a hurry in these days. Or am I going? I don't have a job, you know what? You know, I don't have to be anywhere really on time. Well, you have something better than you. You have something better than a job. You have a career. Well, I guess. What, what do you mean you guess? I did have until I came to do this. now. I don't know what's going on. Yeah, right.

Right, you've never been controversial before. Oh, look, I, well, not needlessly controversial. Look what I found. Oh, you got a little army, man. Yeah, one. These? The one you mean you found them. I did, in fact, these are in, there's a room back there

where I call the Museum of the Random, where I have all my shit from childhood. And obviously, oh, wow! I had a civil war set. Yeah, you did. Oh, I'm sure I'm not even supposed to have this. Wow, but they just, I mean, it was, it was the blue in the gray. I think there's a gray. I think there's a, yeah, there's a Confederate soldier.

You can have that one. And you just triggered the perpetually persecuted with these. Triggered. The perpetually persecuted grievance chonkeys that wake up every morning looking for something to be pissed off. You see that dirt on this guy? Yeah, that dirt is from the 60s. That's old dirt. That's old dirt.

I've heard the same old as dirt, but now that's literate. Yeah. Did you ever collect army men? I don't remember. What was your childhood like? What was it like? When you weren't getting beaten by your father. No man, that happened very rarely anyway. And every Anyway, and every time it happened I deserved it, but my childhood was very Norman Rockwellian me too. I swear me too. It was like it was Both sets of my grandparents. I lived in a little bitty town that did not even have a red light and It was very rural. In both sets of my grandparents, once that of my grandparents lived about a mile and a half from me and the other set lived about three miles from me. I mean, everybody was right there.

I went to the same school that my grandparents went to, you know, K through 12 all on the same campus. It was just a very odd, little place to grow up. I mean, it's funny. You grew up where is this Tennessee? Louisiana. Louisiana. Oh Louisiana. Okay. I grew up in New Jersey. What you would think would be so different, I could almost make the same exact description. I think there was, I think we had no traffic light. There was a four corners. Yeah, we had that.

And where there was like, and there is a traffic light there now. Okay, that's probably right. There's probably light in that. Where there was like four stores. Yeah. Which was the sub-total of the industry in town. Right. I remember my father used to complain about the tax base. And we only would get some industry here.

Like, industry, what's coming to remember? No, Jersey, like the Ford Motor Plane is going to open up in this bedroom community. But it was everybody there either worked in the oil field or they worked in the timber industry. My father worked in the timber industry. He worked for an international paper company at a corrugate plant where they made cardboard. There was a paper mill there and there are most of them had worked there. And then I think it was the late 70s. The Union had just gotten

so ridiculous in that paper mill that they had a big meeting and they were trying to have this negotiation between the Union and international paper company and international paper company, and international paper company sent one representative to this meeting, and he walked in, and he said, I'm not here to negotiate with you. I'm here to tell you that we sold this paper mill to a company in Germany, and we're shutting it down. And immediately that place just went into a depression. And he told me at the town, all those towns around there.

So you're saying the union overplayed their hand? Yeah. And that was where the bad taste in my mouth for union started. That's when it started, because I saw the devastation that could be caused when I got too big for their bridges. I, you know, my grandfather was a union captain.

I have union in my bones. My father was a union lover, straight-up Democrat, Catholic type. And I saw him just crushed in the 70s because he had to go out in sympathy with the engineers' union. Technology changed. And newsmen and disc jockeys no longer needed an engineer. sympathy with the engineers union technology changed and Newsmen and disc jockeys no longer needed an engineer they could just put a cartridge in the slot and play the whatever they had to play And these guys were just sitting around playing cards all day and the union fought for those jobs and

I mean, I guess that's their job, but You got to know when to hold them and when to fold them. I mean, like sometimes you're just fighting and you like, you say with your father, they just, if they overplay the hand, then they, they, we tip over the board and the table and the game is over. At some point, you got to go, do I want this job or no job? Yeah. On the other hand, you do need unions to, in many industries. I mean, I would think, I would say some, I wouldn't say many, but I, because of OSHA, I think when the government came along and stepped in and said, you have to have these, some kind of civilized conditions for these people to work in. And once that came in, you need someone.

No, it's like having an agent. You need someone, that's what a union is. It's a fucking agent that you wouldn't want to negotiate when you did your series. Your agent got whatever the deal was. I'm sure it was a nice rich deal for monarch. Okay, you need an agent and that's what workers need. They need an agent.

They need somebody to negotiate and say, okay, this is our job to know what the number is in your head. And then we're going to give you the number and we're going to get to the right number. And we're going to get you a good sour. You need that agent, that's a union, you need it. Next week's guest is Chris de Stefano and he stayed and helped me tell you about our sponsors. Well the holidays have come and gone which is perfect timing for today's sponsor. One skin. This winter one skin is your best defense against the dry cold,

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And so I think it's been my experience over the years doing this now for 26 or seven years. Country music fans are country music fans everywhere you go. There's not, it's hard to tell the difference. And you can't tell if you didn't know where you were when you walk out on that stage, you're not going to be able to tell from the reaction of the audience because they all act pretty much the same. I think there's some midwestern areas that they seem to be a little more reserved for some reason, you know, but by and large

man, you generally can't tell the difference where you are based on what the audience actually like. I say the same thing. Yeah. I mean, it's like coming to see you and they know that you are the one to say with you. Exactly. Yeah. Right. When we're doing a poll among Trace Atkins fans,

probably the question, are you a fan of Trace Atkins it's gonna get a very high number? And yeah, that's the same thing with me. It's like you've got to really fuck it up if people have paid their harder and money to see you. Yeah. Because they're already predisposed. I mean, that's a lot of motivation.

Money, get a babysitter, a rain. I mean, the last thing everyone to do in this whole world is ever disappointed audience. Yeah, they're coming. You said, I'm having a good time. And you got to give them. You just try not to screw it up. You can't.

Right. And I don't. I'm sure you don't either. No, you don to give him. You just try not to screw it up. You can't. Right. And I don't. And I'm sure you don't either. No, you don't, man. I so less especially. Especially you had those. Oh, great. Oh, thank you.

I'm pretty awesome, man. Adulting and all that stuff. Yes, adulting. That's great. I'm glad you wanted to say. Yeah, I loved, it's amazing how so much has changed. My whole act has changed. I mean, life changes fast. I was reading

like most Gen Z kids think that the country was, is worse often it was 50 years ago. And you just wish you could show them what 1973 looked like. Because I remember 1973, I guess you were just a little younger than me, but you were alive. Yeah. And I mean, just what TV looks like. Leaks kids don't remember when people used to drive down the road and just throw trash out the window. I do.

I do too. Yeah. Trash was everywhere. That's not really anything. Nobody does that anymore. I know. Right. Yes, I see your everywhere. That's not really anything. Nobody does that anymore. I know. Right. Yes, I see your point.

Yes, right. No, it's, it's, we've improved on almost everything. Yeah. And they just seem to want to, I feel like when you're a social justice warrior, you need, you need more injustice than perhaps is in front of you to fix at any moment. Partly because the earlier generations did a lot of the heavy lifting, but it's the work ethic. Why? Don't you think it's the

work ethic? Well, that is. I mean, yes. I mean, partly, they leave school without knowing anything, which I feel is a problem as far as schooling goes. It's just astounding to me how they will let kids out of high school and not know things. Like, and now we know, especially with the pandemic, the reading and math scores are like, like, as far as proficiency, sir, for like fourth and eighth grade, they're like in the 20s and 30s, like 20%, 30% of the kids are proficient in reading. So not only can't they think,

they couldn't even start to because they can't read now. So, you know. And there's no discipline, you know, and there's no discipline, you know, I mean, you can't have success in this life without having some kind of discipline, you know, I mean, you just said you have a whole new show that you've written now that requires discipline and dedication and work. I mean, it just, you know, what I mean, it just... No, no, no, look, we're lucky because our work is fun. Yeah. That's a big difference. I can't compare myself to someone who was like, oh, you know, they're cutting the heads off chickens on a conveyor belt at the

Tyson plant. That's not real. I said all the time. I'll remind myself of that all the time. I won the lottery. I get to earn a living doing something that I love to do. You know, thank God, man. I love that. So blessed. We boar, I mean, I'm sure I didn't have the kind of colorful shit jobs that you've had. I know you were at oil. I love that job though. Really? I love working in an oil field. I love oil. I'm a drilling rig and don't you get oil all over you? Not really. I mean, some days, some days, yeah. Some days you would get filthy, but other days, you know. Why?

Because you needed to finish your 12 hour tour dirty. Are your boss wouldn't think you'd see? He worked 12 hours in a row. Yeah. Oh my row. Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah, 14, 14 days on 14 days off. 12 hours a day. Why do they arrange it like that?

Because then you go off. Those offshore, yeah. Oh, I see. Yeah, you'd stay on the rig for two weeks. So you work for 14 days straight 12 hours a day. See, it's almost like doing a movie. Only have time to do the thing and then sleep. There you go. That's what it was. Except it's not really like doing a movie. You only have time to do the thing and then sleep. There you go.

That's what it was. Except it's not really like doing a movie because you're fucking full of oil. But so, like, I'm fascinated by this. This was offshore. Louisiana, I see. And what, so what happens? You catch the oil in the sea and you bring it up like fish.

What do I like? Like, it's a, I've seen video, I've been obviously, but it looks like there's a big thing on the... So what are you doing? How are you getting the oil from the... Froke in a hole in the ground? Yeah, but then when it comes up on the ship, you're putting it in barrels? But sometimes they will lay a pipeline, usually they'll lay a pipeline from the platform back to the shore. Yeah, to those big... Oh, right, of course.

So you're just monitoring how it's coming up through the... I didn't do the production end of it. I just did the drilling part. We... Somebody finds the oil, which in the case, which in the Gulf of Mexico, it's very hard to drill a well in the Gulf of Mexico that you're not going to hit oil. It's everywhere. Yeah, so, you know, we would drill the wells

and then sometimes we would test the well to see if it was a good well, you know, and I don't know what the numbers were on how they judge that, but, you know, then we would just cap it off and then we would move on to another location and drill another well. And then somebody else would come in behind us with a work over rig, a production rig, and put the well. But you're on the boat the whole time.

No, I was on a jack up. What's that? It's a big huge barge that has legs on it and you get towed to the location Oh, I see. And then the legs go down to the ocean floor and then you literally jack the whole barge up out of the water And then you drill well So and you do this in one day? Oh, no months. Oh Yeah, on one place like that. Yeah, why because it's just so long to get the thing in a very long time, you know, to drill 10 or 12,000 feet.

Oh, I see. Yeah. Why, because the drill gets like stuck on shit and it's just something, it gets pretty hard once you get on down there and you got to drill through these layers of rock and stuff. But how can you control the drill from where we're up top on the ocean? Oh man, those guys are brilliant. I mean, the technology is just, they know exactly which,

and they can make that bit go whichever direction they want it to go. You know, you could set in one spot and drill drill wells out there, out there, out there. How do you know when you hit the oil? You'll see it, it'll start coming back in the mud. You know, the mud that you use to get the cuttings out of the hole, you'll start,

because you're always testing the mud to see, and then you'll see it'll start coming back, or you might take a kick and you'll know you've hit it, you know, wow. Yeah. And you like this. I did, man. I did, you know you've hit it, you know. Wow. Yeah. And you like this. I did, man. I did, you know, because I swear, you know, it was,

I worked, I was a rough neck, and then I started working Derek's. I was a Derek Hand, and, you know, I, shit, I was the cock of the walk, man. And it was a very competitive environment. It was like, really? Because when I quit playing college football and then I started working in the oil field, it was like, it was a continuation of a team sport almost. It's a lot of guys, right?

A lot of guys. There were 40 or 50 men on that rig. But just men So You know a female engineer would come out from time to time not very often But for so for your half your life the 14 days you're on your just in an atmosphere of all men. Yeah, and you like that Hey, you know Don't you dare I'm not I'm not driving in anything. Oh, really, it kind of feels like you are. No, man.

It was a very competitive kind of thing. And it was like, yeah, I felt like I was the best hand on that rig. And you want to think you're a better hand than I am. Let's go at it. Let's see who can, you know, why the guys are off shore doing a lot of drilling. There's nothing gay about this. God. I never saw that.

Maybe it happened. I don't know. Really? Not with me, I don't know. Right. Okay, so then you go back. What about, tell me about the 14 days when you're back home because then you're not working. So this is when the Trace Actions legend becomes started getting out of

it. Yeah. Right. Because you must be like just partying the whole time, right? Well, it was no, no, but it did allow me to start hook up with a band and start playing clubs on the weekend. Oh really? You know, so it allowed me to start doing that. And then it kind of just started to get bigger and bigger and bigger to the point that I finally took a leave of absence from my all-field job and went on the road and started playing clubs in Texas. You know, and then that six month leave of absence turned into four and a half years. And then finally, I got to a point where I woke up one morning and looked in the mirror and said five years ago, I wouldn't have been called hanging out with somebody like you, you know,

and I quit. When did that happen? It was 89. Really? You stopped getting into trouble in 89? No, stopped getting into trouble. No, I just quit playing clubs and I went back to working in Olfiel. Oh, you went back? Why? I thought I was gonna kill myself.

I mean, the drinking and the drugs and just it was just, you know, I could see myself just shriveling up and it was like, you know, I got to get away. What couldn't you have done it without me? Without over drinking and drugs. I don't know, why I'm quacking any addict, not. You think you're really an addict, right? You're not just a guy who was partying to her.

I, you know what, man, I think I must be because I've had so many things that happen to me in my life. And most of the bad stuff that's happened to me in my life almost exclusively. I can say, yeah, I was drunk or I was under the influence. But I feel like a lot of that is because you sing about it. All country music. It seems to be always on your mind. And there's so many songs about drinking and over drinking and the problems of drinking.

And it's like, I feel like you're self hypnotizing yourselves into being drunk. I don't do a lot of those anymore. I know, but like, is that a ridiculous theory? No, I just think, no, I don't think the song came first and then you started, you know, it's not a chicken or the egg type of thing, I think, you know. I see, you're saying you're writing about,

you're writing about what you've already done. You may be right about that. That's been my experience. No, I understand. Well, but anyway, where was I? That matter. It was a boring story. No, I'm fascinated by the oil rig thing and the fact that you would go back to it. I did go back to it. I stayed out there for another three years and then, you know, and then I got that phone call, you know, from a guy that was my manager, or that had booked me in clubs in Texas in New Mexico.

And he had since moved to Nashville. He called me one day and he said, you sing it anymore. And I said, I don't even sing in a shower. I'm done. And he said, he said, well, one of these days, you're gonna have to look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself the question,

I wonder what would have happened if. And I said, every way. And he said, if you would have thrown down the pom-poms and gotten the game, he said, this is where you need to be. Wow. You need to come to Nashville. This is where they make what you want to be. So what year was it?

92. 92. So, you know, I didn't immediately do it. I thought about it for a while. And then that thought of what, you know, look at having to look at myself in the mirror someday and ask myself that question, scared me worse than selling the house and going to Nashville. So I ended up finding that. Were you married at the time? Did you have children to consider? I wasn't married at that time, but I got married soon after that. And I had a couple of girls from my first marriage.

Right. Yeah. So that guy really is the guy who changed your life for you. Yeah. It's sent him a fucking case of stake every Christmas. Well, we lost him a couple years ago. Well, I might, yeah, I love him. He was great. And his son is, you know, I'm helping me now. He's tour managing and oh, wow, that's great. I'm surprised at how much country music I have in my iPod. Like, it's definitely not the preponderance. Yeah, but over the years, you know, and there's probably one, you should probably tell me who I should like fucking down like because I don't know a lot of them but like You know, I love you. You know what I just broke and done. Yeah, great Lonnie Donnell on the best country singers. I don't have anything by him. Don't know him, but it's like done. Oh, that's Brooks and done

and Kid rock I would say is sort of in that category, like redneck rock. I love a lot of that stuff. Oh, I'm sure there's others I'm leaving out. Yeah, Kid Rock's kind of, you know, Bobby's Southern rock rap country. Something like that. Not rap. I mean, he doesn't rap.

He can't put him in a box. Yeah, but he doesn't rap much. Almost of his albums that I or not, there's like maybe one song that's not what I like about him. But I mean, I don't mean the rap. I mean, he has that hip hop vibe. He's got that, you know, kind of like. I just, I really had not heard of this Jason Aldin guy. Oh, yeah, but I don't know him, his stuff, is he good? Yeah.

Yeah, man. Jason toured with us years ago, probably, I bet it was right when he first came out, probably about 15 years ago, and we did a tour together, and he went out with us for a few months. So he's in trouble because he is, I actually love the name of this song, Try That in a Small Town, right? This is the one I'm thinking of. Yeah, that's yeah.

And I had no idea about it. I didn't, I hadn't heard the song. I don't keep up, man. I don't listen to the current country stuff. I haven't heard it either, but I read, I mean, the people writing about it constantly. And I believe Coleman Hughes. You know, that is brilliant, right? It brilliant, I've had him on real time. He's young, I would say 30, black and brilliant. And he basically said it was a smear job. Because he said, first of all, they shot it in front of this courthouse where they lynched somebody 100 years earlier.

He said, Jason Aldin probably didn't know that. I had no idea. Yeah, that they've used this in other movies. It's in like Hannah Montana or something. It's just, you know, the people who just want to get you. Yeah. The ones who pissed me off. And then there was, I felt like there was no smoking gun of like, you know, there's just this just different kinds of Americans. You can't bully the people who grew up in Tennessee or Louisiana into being you. This sounds like Jason Olene, it sounds like he's a country guy.

This is kind of shit he's into and the kind of stuff he thinks, Christianity, all that stuff. It's not my jam, but you can't bully people into not being who they are and they are no worse than you. This might take on that. But again, I haven't really dealt with it. It's just it's all so silly anyway. The grievance junkies turn on somebody and they try to cancel them and all it's going to do, he's going to sell more records than he ever has and it's just he's going to make

him bigger than he's ever been and it's just That's just and the other guy because he's not he's not he did he had no idea man, you know You know how many music videos I've done that I Called up the director and went hey man now. What about this location where we're shooting this thing? You know and and if I did do that it would only be because I didn't know where I was going. You know what I'm sayin'? Yeah. But it's like, he had no idea, you know, that director picked that location, and because

it had the look they wanted it to look. It's a look. It was just a small town for a house. You know, that's all it was. And it happened to be close. It's like, it's not the way to fight racism by just making shit up to point your finger at somebody and who's the other guy who got in trouble for it?

But it didn't, it turned him not at all. I think he's a giant. Oh Morgan Walla. There you go. gotten trouble for it, but it didn't, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's a giant, oh Morgan Wall. And there you go. He sold out two nights in a row, 55,000 plus tickets each night, you know, God canceled me. You know? Yeah. And I just, you know, maybe I'm naive, but I just don't think these people are racists.

He's, man. I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just...

I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... I just... It's just a shame that we can't get past the past. You know, and, yeah, I mean, look, I love playing your part of the country because the audience I get is a mostly liberal audience, but they're not to stick up their ass liberal types

in Oklahoma. No, you know what I'm saying? Anytime you, even if you're in a red state, when you're in the city, you're in a blue part of the red state, right? So, you know, I've been in Alabama and the people look exactly like they look everywhere else that come to my show.

Right. And, you know, but they just don't have that sort of like nose in the air kind of, how dare you, like I'm waiting for you to say the wrong thing, attitude. They're like, we're here to have fun. It's a fucking comedy show. Yeah. I love stand-up comics. I always have. They're like, we're here to have fun. It's a fucking comedy show. Yeah. I love stand-up comics.

I always have. I've been a fan. I go to Zaini's fairly regularly. You know, we're the best. Little club there in Nashville, you know. Really, you do. You go to Zaini's. And I played in Zaini's a million years ago.

And I just, do you know how hard it would be for me to go here, comedians or see comedians? If I only chose to listen to conservative comedians, there wouldn't be very many. I would never get to go to a show, you know. But there's more. I can appreciate the comedy. It's interesting, though. Yes, not a lot of what I would call conservative comedians, but there's a lot more conservative themes in comics like me, Bill Burr. I could name a lot of Dave Chappelle, lots of people because the left is crazy.

Because they're spot lighting the absurdity. Yes, because we are comics. Because that shit's funny. Exactly absurdity is funny. We go where the comedy is. There you go. We go absurdity is funny. Exactly.

So if you're gonna be absurd, you're gonna make fun of it. And you're, yeah. So and you deserve it. And you deserve it. Exactly. And it should tell them something that people are laughing that it rings true.

Because laughter is involuntary. You know, that's the one really great thing about it. You know, you can be the biggest comedy star in the world. I saw it happen back when I was in the starting out in the clubs and Rodney Dangerfield would walk in it. Some big star and the crowd would go wild. And he got about a minute of grace time when they would just kind of nervous laughter if he wasn't really funny.

After that, you've got to earn your wings every minute up there. There you are. No matter who you are, you can't. People cannot. That's why I've said I got such respect for what you guys do because you're working without a net, man. You are correct. Got no net. I've got those five or six guys standing up there on stage with me. I got my gangly pussy. You know, yeah, I got my muscle. You don't like what I'm doing. You're gonna do with these guys. You know, well, you know, have a cheer up there by yourself and you, yeah, I got what I got just crazy respect for what you guys. One of the one of the Beatles in the great anthology said, when they were asking about Elvis,

and they said, I think it was Georgie said, you know, with us, there was the four of us, so whatever we were going through, no matter how crazy it was, we had each other, but Elvis, you know, he only had himself, and it's like, oh, that's so true. Like, God, I hate that I missed Elvis. I wish I would have had a chance.

Oh, he's still alive. He's working at this 7-11. You know? Yeah, I mean, you'd never met him. No, you of course not. No, he died in 77. You could have been a teenager with, I remember one time,

Pangellette said to me, he said, if you ever get into an argument with somebody that's from another country and they're talking about, you know, extolling the grand things that their country has given the world, you know, he said you can always win that argument with one word, Elvis. Wow. You know? I mean, he was the first cult of personality, you know, in modern history. Well, I don't know about that.

Well, who else was? Charlie Chaplin. Oh, my God. You should not. That's not modern history. Of course it is. I mean, there were, but yes, Charlie Chaplin was a star of almost unbelievable magnitude by our standards.

I mean, he was paid the kind of money that would sound impressive today when the movies cost like a penny and a house cost $12,000. Yes. Okay, well, let me narrow it. And when he went to the... Let me narrow it. Like, the headline in the paper, when he went back to London, I think, was just, he's here.

You know, it was big. There were big people, but I... Look, there are people who will argue about Mr. Gillette's theory about Elvis. I'm not one of them. I've always been since about age 14 when it was 1970, and I had not paid attention to Elvis before, but I really hadn't paid attention to music until I was about 12.

So I got into the Beatles, and Elvis, in my mind, at that time was always this old dude who was before my time in corny rock and roll, hevel swips. And then I heard a couple of songs that he did around that time, which is the time I love Elvis, the, when he got out of the movie contract from suspicious minds until he died,

he put out some amazing shit. And he wasn't fat until the last two years. Yeah. Very mature, I mean, Bert Backrack wrote any day no for him and I mean some great stuff. But yeah. Well, there was no roadmap for Elvis. I mean, there was no musician that had ever experienced.

He was the first, you know, that just that phenomenon that was. Yes, I think Bing Crosby was certainly a Matt and A. Idle star, but no, you're right. Bing Crosby was huge, probably in the 30s, he was not Elvis. Sinatra in the fifth, in the...oh wait, Sinatra was like the, Ben Grasov was the 20s. Sinatra in the late 30s, early 40s was Elvis, Elvis, yes. It was a phenomenon. It was a happening when he went someplace,

they, you know, just this intense excitement that you felt around where he was and what he was doing. And of course the women must have been insati. But Elvis certainly. I'll let you have all those also rams I'm going to stick with Elvis. No I love Elvis too, you can't get me on Elvis. I'll stop arguing with me then. Well I'm just giving you the reality.

And then the Beatles really outdid Elvis. There was much more of a worldwide phenomenon with the Beatles. Beatles Mania was World War II. But they were huge Elvis fans. Yes, they were. Yeah. Although, he also disappointed them. I mean, Paul McCartney and I think Lenin said, we loved him from 56 to 58,

and then when he got out of the army in 1960, there was something that was missing. And they're not wrong. I mean, that whole 60s was a lost decade. It was a lot of, it was what he called the travel logs. It was like, he did 29 movies. I mean, about 25 of them were fun and acapoco and girls, girls, girls, I don't know.

Just the silly thing, there was the same script in a different location and forgettable songs, but when he came out of that, I mean, he did have a great final act, I think, musically. If you listen to that stuff from the early 70s. Probably, you know. I remember when I was a kid, my aunt, my dad's younger sister. They didn't have a television. And the only time that she would come to our house and spend the night would be on a night

when a nailless movie was coming on. She would come to our house and spend the night so she could watch the Elvis. And she and my mother would sit up and watch the Elvis movie. You know, I just remember that when I was a kid. I just realized that that's so strange. I thought the movie, and did you see the movie? I saw some of it. I don't know. There was something about it that made it just, it was almost unbearable. It was so... Well, I thought the performance was great.

Yeah, the guy did a good job. I didn't think the movie was great. I didn't either. And I mean, I don't think they, I mean, I understand they tried to capture, you know, the thing where he was recalled out the kernel from the stage in Vegas. He would never have done that.

So much of it was bullshit. As someone who knows the biography, that would bothered me one. Two, I don't think Tom Hanks is great as an accuracy is. It was right for the part of Colonel Tom Parker. Didn't seem like a... He's too good. He's too nice.

He's fucking Tom Hanks. I needed some scumbag. Because that is the tragedy of Elvis. What did Elvis die of? Bad management. Damn right. Bad management. He died of bad management.

Everything that he did and everything that he was, think of what he could have been. What have been? The Colonel wouldn't let him go overseas where he was adored, and yet he never played Paris. He never played London. He was. Yes, because the Colonel was a...

I couldn't go. ...curd and go. And the movie contract, and the fact that Elvis was this pathetic hillbilly who could not stop himself apparently from letting this father figure. Again, I thought that was rather clumsily portrayed in the movie, but maybe it did well on being picky, but that's the tragedy of Elvis that he could not get away from that shadow.

I mean, he didn't do the Star Is Born. He was offered the Star Is Born with Barbara Streisand, and I think the story was he would not accept second billing. And you don't want to get into that fight with Barbara Streisand. No. And you shouldn't. So the Colonel, I didn't know that story. She was a much bigger star at the time.

What? So the Colonel wouldn't let him do it because he wasn't getting top billing. Is that what happened? I don't know. Right. But probably the Colonel just didn't want him ever to, it's very Howard Husey, and you know, the way Howard Huse had these Mormons around him who kept him insulated, and Howard Huse had an inclination to go back into the real world.

He didn't want to be this recluse, but they would scare him back every time. Germs, Germs Howard. There's germs out there, and he crawled back into his cell that he made for himself, pissing into bottles because he was afraid of germs. He'd be perfect for COVID. He would have been a regular doctor about you, but okay, so, but Elvis was kind of like Dr. Fauci, but okay, so, but Elvis was kind of like wanting to expand and the colonel scared him every time into going back to his ruts. I mean, he worked him like a mule. People don't realize the day he died, he was scheduled to go to Portland, Maine. I've been to Portland, Maine. I have to. Okay.

We said, Portland, we'd say it was such resignation. I went there in the winter. Portland was oh wow. You do love show. I did a winter tour one time. Wow. And you know, and you know, what I was told when I was convinced to go do it was man, you're gonna love it man. You go up north, you know, way up north and you do this winter tour and these people all have cabin fever and they come out to the shows and lose their north, you know, way up north, and you do this winter tour, and these people all have cabin fever, and they come out to the shows and lose their minds, you know. And, um, and, well, that didn't, I held. I was miserable. Okay. Couldn't get off the bus, you know, I mean, it was hard to get from one show to the next. And then

when you got there, it was all I could do to get off the bus and get to the door to get in the venue, you know, because I just, it was brutal. Yeah. Oh, my God, I'd go on stage and I'd just like, what's wrong with you people? Right. Why do you live here? Right. You know, I've been a long time since I've traveled in the cold. Yeah, that's the only one or two I've ever do in a year. Right. No, I don't understand how people, I mean, obviously people have economic limitations and family limitations. And also people just like living where they, near

where they grew up, most people don't leave. You know, there's, there's, well, and the summers are nice. Yeah. There's, there's somebody known as, what Cheshire man, I think he's called, it's this town in England, Cheshire. I think I'm saying it right. I'm maybe getting it wrong. And they found the skeletons of a 9,000 year old ancestor, human ancestor, 9,000 year old. And they traced his DNA back to someone who still lives in the town. Wow.

In 9,000 years, this family moved like a block. It says something about humans. Are you kidding us, true? I'm like kidding. No. Oh, wow. Yeah. So, I mean, that's one reason. People just, they need to get out. I mean, really.

But have you ever been to Canada, like, in the winter? Like, it's 10 degrees, and they're wearing short-sleeved shirts. They just adapt. Humans adapt. I went to my wife's parents for Christmas, this past Christmas, and I shoveled snow for four days. and I shoveled snow for four days. To get past four days. You earned some husband points there. I did. I hope you got rewarded. Man, it was.

I swear the snow was above my head. Right. Oh, wow, especially after I'd shoveled it all off the drive You know right? It's crazy the thing you should do for love right I was just doing it so I can get to the store. It's the cigarettes Wait, that's not so romantic it's not at all. I know. But that's why I had to get out.

But your songs are so... I mean, you're such a... You really are a romantic. I mean, a lot of your songs. I mean, even that... You have that one about the old lady who fucked you when you were a kid. Oh my God. I won a kid.

I was legal. I was... I was legal. I was legal. Is that true? Yes. Was that your virginity? No. No, but it's true.

How old was that lady? She was 36. Well, another row of it. I mean, in your 18. 19. And she called you a honey child. See, that's what made me think she was older. That's what I thought.

So I was like, 70. She didn't call me honey child. You made up the whole thing. No, I didn't make up the whole thing, but that, I just thought, man, that's a cool little, that's a cool little turn. When she called me Honey Child, and then I'm gonna pour this on you

and make it taste like Honey Child. No, you're no. So I ever lyricist, well, I didn't write that. But oh, really? No. But the story's true. She's just crazy. How disappointing.

You don't write all your own? Not all of it. Oh. Well, man, why would I? I swear, you know, see, how do you get material like that in Nashville? Like you just, you just, just so many people like who are writing songs and you go there and you throw your big money around because you're a big star. Well, one of the things is I've become, I had a dear friend of mine that who has since passed

away, but he was a songwriter. We wrote a lot of songs together and he just told me, he said, man, you've become the laziest good songwriter that I know. And the reason he said that was because like, if a hook comes to me or a melody comes to me and I melody comes to me, and I think on it for a while, and then I think, okay, who, which songwriter in my role of Dex,

is that idea in his will house? And then that's who I'll call, and I'll pick up the phone, and I'll go, hey, Monty, or hey Casey, or Rivers, or, you know. And then that's your writing partner, or something. Yeah, and you're writing it to your side. Here's my idea.

Oh, so you like to write it with somebody. Yeah. I love to write too with piano players. I don't play piano, you know. Right. And I would rather write with piano player. And you have to write the lyrics on the music at the same time? Usually I have a basic idea of what the core progression and the melody may be.

But then there are other guys too that I work with that I don't like this melody. I know there's a better one out there. And so I'll get with somebody that's really good at melodies and we'll come up with something better. And some of these songs I hear today, it's like, why didn't you guys take a couple more days? You got it to that point and then you just said this is, you turned it in and you said this is good enough and if you just let it rest and let your ears rest for a couple of days and go back and listen to it again, you know. You could have made it better.

I hate it when I hear hooks and songs and then the song just wasn't what they didn't write it, you know, they just didn't write it. They got it close enough and then they quit, you know, and Lynn said, that's good enough, you know, I hate that, man. You wasted a good hook because you got lazy and you didn't finish the song. But I can't say anything because I'm the lazy songwriter in the world. I mean, really it doesn't sound like it. You know, I think when I think about kind of your music now, what's different about it? What I mean, I don't like any song unless I like the song. The lyrics can be the greatest thing in the world, it doesn't matter if the song isn't good. And it doesn't work on the reverse.

The lyrics can be shit, they're better if they're good, but I don't care. If I like the song, I've listened to Zillian's songs, I can name some where the lyrics are shit. Or just gobbledy-gook. Yeah. You know, get back. What does that mean? I don't ever want to write anything that I don't think at least said something at least

mildly profound, at least to me. Or what I'm saying, that's not a very high bar. No. You know what I mean? But it's got to say something at least mildly profound to me. Or what I'm saying. Or it's got to be very clever. Clather. This is what I least mildly profound to me. Or what I've got to be very clever. Clever.

This is what I was getting at. Country music that I feel is a little different. Humor. Humor. All of it. It's a lot of it is funny. A lot of your stuff is funny. All the diddies that I've done in my career,

what people call diddies, I think they're cleverly written and they're funny. I left something turned on. That's funny. That's clever. That's clever. It's very clever. Hockey-tonk, but don't, don't, is clever. Yes, it is.

It's cleverly written. I like that. And I can say that, I didn't write it. It's cleverly written. Yes. But that's like, I left something turned on at home, which is something you would not hear in pop music. They would just not write that. No. And that's why you have to go to country music, but things like that. It is clever.

But again, I wouldn't like it if I didn't like the song. I like it better the way I do it now than the way I recorded it back then, too. It's evolved into something completely different. I really, I listen back to those first few albums that I did, and I just, I'm better at what I do now than I was when I, me too. I'm sorry about that. People that bought the records. I think the same thing.

I'm better now. Right. I think I could look at my first two or three HBO specials. And there wouldn't be as good as a adult thing. And I would know that. This is why I would never look at them. But yeah, you can't be, you know, I was 29 or whatever. You can't be more than you are.

I appreciate people who appreciated me at the time. And there are some people who think we're worse. Who like, you know, that's just taste. I don't think they're right. Yeah, and music appreciation is an opinion and everybody's just different. And that's good. I'm's there are a few people out there that like what I do, you know. Yeah, it's a good thing. It's a great thing to think and you kind of you have every right to think that your last one was your best one. You don't want to be in that place, I mean athletes are always in this place where they think, oh Christ, I'm 35 and I peaked five years ago?

That's rough. Yeah. You know, there's also the, I listen to my voice now, as opposed to 30 years ago. And when I listen to my voice back then, I can't really listen to it, it sounds thinner and it doesn't have that. I don't know. No smoking and drinking definitely did a lot of good things for your voice. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's just smoother and it's very unique. It's great. It's you know and that's a good thing. Why you're not doing a million voice hovers, I don't know. I do, I do enough, man. I do, I do, I do very enough to keep me busy and I enjoy doing it. But you know, and that's the thing about, about having a voice like this that I was, that I thank God, I was blessed with. I mean, it's just the older I get, it's gonna get better. Listen to

you know, James Earl Jones, my God, he's been saying this, I see a man for 40 years. You know who I thought was better post-16, Sinatra. Yeah. His voice got quite different. I mean, he also was the materially chose. Yeah. You know, I mean, he's another one like Elvis. I didn't, I would never, I mean,

I was in a round for that early Sinatra time. But, you know, I don't, except for, it might as well be swing, the one with Basie. That's a great album. For that, you know, it's like mid-50s and America's feeling good about itself. I mean, obviously it was not diverse.

That's one of the things. One of the things. I had a deal on not to do this that I've been threatening to do for the last decade and I haven't done it yet, but what? I tend to. I want to do a crewener record before I go out. A crewener record?

Wow. You know, I'm just go back and cover some of those, some of those old classes. Ordered a three. One more for the road, stuff like that. No one in the place. Exactly. I want to do it. I want to do it.

So, I think it would be fun to do you know check them up Joe Give me all your money You want for my baby alright for the room. I can't Because I don't do stuff for the money anymore. I ask a question. Would that be fun to do you? Obviously, I don't do stuff for the money anymore. I know. You're not paying me? I appreciate it.

Really do. If I hadn't been here, I wouldn't have come. Climb around around around. I wanted to come out here and just sit around and shoot the shit with an old friend. I know you did. And I'm so glad you did. I'm gonna shoot the shit with an old friend.

I know you did, and I'm so glad you did. You did?