Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 544: Chicken-Swinging Sin Transfer Weekend
Episode Date: October 5, 2020Stories from the Week...
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The explicit tag is there for a reason. recording live from glory holes all over illinois this is cognitive distance
i like that episode we blast anyone who gets in our way
you know what cecil at this point we're like a traveling glory hole road show. I think he's looking at it with a magnifying glass.
You know,
this is actually a pretty nice glory hole.
You kept it in good repair.
You still can't get anything for it
because it's a glory hole,
but it's in nice repair.
It's still a nice repair.
Yeah.
You did it.
I'm just saying.
Weird thing to bring back from you from the war.
I just want to say that out loud.
It's a weird memento to bring back.
As souvenirs go.
Yeah.
You know.
Some people collect spoons to the places they go.
Maybe thimbles next time.
I mean, taking the whole glory hole is just a little weird.
With a license plate with your name on it or whatever.
I went on vacation.
All I got was this lousy glory hole.
I went on vacation.
All I got was this lousy glory hole.
This is Cognitive Dissonance.
Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way.
We bring critical thinking, skepticism, and irreverence to any topic that makes the news,
makes it big, or makes us mad.
It's skeptical.
It's political. And there is no civility in the debates
this is episode 543 and it is the yelly old man show i'm gonna interrupt you i'm gonna interrupt
you i'm gonna can i just say like now without me interrupting you how how fucking cringe fest was that entire
fucking thing to watch the president constantly interrupt never allow biden to speak and just
while he's talking just keep trying to trip him up and keep trying to interrupt him.
Never let him make a point.
You know, it's like,
it's like screaming over someone,
you know, there's 200,000 copies.
It's like, ah, ah,
the whole time you won't let him say it out loud.
It's so embarrassing.
It's so embarrassing.
Can you imagine how this guy must be to golf with?
You're like setting up to the tee
and you've been like crushing him all day.
And he's just like, like right as you're about to swing the whole thing was just an obvious ploy or an
obvious strategy to fluster joe bite right like if he can get a guy who's a stutterer he's a stutterer
and that exact and that's exactly it right so if you get a guy who stutters and you don't give him an opportunity to speak with
intentionality, you're more likely to get him to flub in one of two ways. Either he's going to
stutter or, and I was reading an article about this, people who stutter, they have a tendency
to make more verbal gaffes because they have to speak very intentionally. If they are coming up
on a word that they know is a difficult word,
they'll pivot in the moment and choose a different word.
And so that creates more,
it's not that they don't know what they're trying to say.
It's not they're trying to say something unintelligible.
It's just, it's a mechanism to avoid the stutter, right?
I find myself doing that.
I do that myself.
So, yeah.
I do that.
It's so funny, Cecil.
When I was in college,
and even as a, as a
writing major, right. So, um, I would occasionally like I'd write a sentence and I'd be like, I don't
know exactly how to phrase this or punctuate this, or if this is exactly the right word choice.
And instead of figuring out the answer to that, I would back out the whole sentence and just write
something entirely different. I'll just say something else. Like, I'm not even going to
go down that way. Nope. Yeah. Uh-uh. Yeah. So it was obviously, it was a clear intent to do a
couple of things. It was one to capitalize really on somebody's disability. Sure. That's really the
first very clear aim of behaving like that, right? And the other thing is, like, if he can just domineer and dominate him,
then he can create a narrative of strength.
He can create a narrative that, like, he's a strong candidate,
and, you know, Joe Biden is a weak candidate who couldn't get a word in edgewise,
and it's not my fault.
I don't know why the Dems are putting up these, you know, puny little weaklings,
you know, that kind of bullshit. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And his base loved it. His base. I looked the next day.
His base loved it. He retweeted somebody who said, you look so strong on the stage, Mr. President,
you dominated that debate. They love that shit. They love it. And so he did exactly what his base
wanted him to do, which I think strategically was a terrible mistake.
It's a bad idea. Yeah, because, you know, first of all, we've talked about this before,
but the debates don't move. The debates don't move people. Like the studies show that like
the debates are not a driving force. They don't change the polling numbers. They don't change
the outcomes of the elections. Lots of people win the debates and lose the election.
That's, I mean, it happened in 2016.
I mean, Hillary, by all measures, won those debates and lost the election.
So winning the debates doesn't mean anything in terms of like whether or not you're going
to get the turnout.
You're right.
Tom, I go back to your previous point.
There's literally no way George W. Bush could win a debate.
You know what I mean?
Like, and he won two elections.
But there's no way.
I don't remember those debates, but I guarantee he didn't win them.
Well, I'm just a simple cowboy.
He's a fucking talking horse, that guy.
But, you know, like, let's talk about that a little bit.
Like, the W debates, and's talk about that a little bit like the w debates and i do
remember them a little bit like the w debates they were fucking civil man oh yeah like yeah
i like one guy would talk and he would lay out his vision and then maybe criticize his opponent
a little bit and then the other guy would talk and criticize his opponent and and recover from
the criticism he just did that and but they would do this crazy thing where they would take turns and then they would attempt to elucidate for the
American people their vision for America as leaders or potential leaders of the free fucking world.
That was like a thing we used to do. And now two old men scream at each other in front of Chris Wallace
who tries not to cry.
That's like,
that is America in 20.
We could not have had
a more wonderfully
2020 debate though.
I don't want it to be different
because it would just feel
out of place in this timeline.
It would.
You know, I will say this.
The biggest takeaway
from the debate
needs to be that he couldn't denounce white supremacy. say this the biggest takeaway from the debate needs to be that
he couldn't denounce white white supremacy that is the biggest takeaway from the debate a hundred
there's no other in my opinion there's no other real takeaway than the fact that he turned to
the proud boys and said stand back and stand by he did not say stand down by the way right which
even even that would be problematic at best at its very best interpretation of stand down by the way right which even even that would be problematic at best at its very best
interpretation of stand down right is problematic right but to say stand back and stand by is a
terrifying that's not a slip of the tongue either no it's not it's not a fucking you know i know
that everybody's gonna everybody's trying to play it up as at least everybody on the left is like, oh, I don't know what he meant, you know, whatever.
It's real easy just to say I denounce white supremacy.
It's super easy to say that out loud.
It's a fucking idea that's super easy to denounce, and he wouldn't do it.
And so that to me is a huge problem and should be exploited constantly from now until forever. No one
should ever forget about it. And if you were a person of color watching that, you probably just
said, see, I told you. I fucking told you all along. I told all you motherfuckers all along
and no one would listen. Absolutely. When you say to a group like the Proud Boys, stand by and stand
down or stand- No, they didn't say, yeah, stand by and stand back, stand by and stand back.
You're one of the things you're de facto acknowledging is I have control over
this organization,
right?
Because I am looked to by that organization as a leader,
which is why the proud boys celebrated,
by the way.
Yeah.
Like they,
they openly celebrated.
And it's not the first time that white supremacists have openly celebrated
when Trump has said evil, awful fucking dog whistly bullshit.
Yep.
And like the Klan has openly celebrated like you can't.
But the thing is, he can't denounce them because they're a big chunk of his base.
Trump is backed into a terrible corner, I think. And I think the corner that he's backed into is that he's spent such a long time really playing to a increasingly narrow base of people, right?
So in 2016, I think he got some benefit of the doubt from the Rust Belt white Americans
that he was going to, yeah, maybe I don't like this thing about him or that thing about him.
But if he's going to shake stuff up and if he's going to, yeah, maybe I don't like this thing about him or that thing about him.
But, you know, if he's going to shake stuff up and if he's going to bring manufacturing jobs back or he's going to bring coal jobs back, you know, to Virginia, if he's going to do these things,
I want that because the economic recovery didn't make its way to the Rust Belt and to the Midwestern states,
you know, parts of America. And that's, I think that's the reason that he won.
I mean, that's what all the analysis after the fact really indicated. And he came in as an outsider. To bolster your point,
he played the outsider thing up constantly. Well, he can't do that anymore. Yeah. You can't be the
outsider after four years running the country. That just doesn't make sense. The president is
not an outsider. The president is not an outsider. That's absurd. Right. Yeah. And I think like now what's happened
is that he spent, he spent three and a half years cultivating a base of exclusively white,
exclusively, or almost exclusively racist, almost exclusively lower to lower middle class.
most exclusively lower to lower middle class.
Like his demographic keeps cutting his pie is my point.
He keeps cutting his pie and cutting his pie and cutting his pie.
And he doesn't have enough people left.
He can't, on the one, he's fucked.
On the one hand, he can't denounce white supremacy
because he needs the white supremacists.
He needs the racists.
He needs to be able to say,
look, he needs that dog whistle of like,
you need to protect white suburban America
from the blacks, right?
As he calls it, the blacks, right?
He needs that.
So he can't shit on racists.
Racists are a big chunk of his base.
But the problem is like,
it's not going to be enough.
Like I really,
I, I, I know I was wrong before and I could possibly be wrong and I'm not as confident as I
was, but like, man, the numbers are so strong. The numbers are so strong. And after the debate,
people were appalled by his action. I know his base loved it, but they would love anything. Like
he could, he could fucking rape somebody in the middle of the fucking street. And they'd be like, look how strong he was.
Look how great, because he's fucking awful.
But he's only like appealing to terrible people.
Well, and, you know, he also,
throughout the entire debate,
kept throwing, and he's done this for three years,
kept throwing the left basically under the bus.
The radical left, the radical left,
the radical left, the radical left, the radical left, the radical left.
He called Biden the radical left, guys.
I love that.
Biden is the radical left.
If Biden is the radical left,
my dad was fucking Che Guevara.
Like, what the fuck are you talking about?
Are you serious?
That is the dumbest shit I've ever heard in my entire life,
but he's screaming it.
And Biden's a admitted centrist.
Like he's not somebody who's bringing in far left policies.
He's on stage saying, no, my policy is different than this one.
My policy is different than the Green New Deal.
My policy is, he's saying it out loud and he can't, he can't let it go.
So he's alienating the, he's alienating Democrats too.
He's alienating a ton of Democrats.
And these are some people that he might've played to before when he was running against Hillary and
he's not able to play to them anymore. Like you said, he keeps cutting the pie smaller and smaller
and smaller and only appealing to a very select group of people. Now this select group of people
is a scary group of people because they're a cult, because they're armed,
and because they're active, right? Those three things make them very, very scary. And him saying
he wants poll watchers, and during the debate, he tweeted out this poll watch thing to sign up for
like a Trump army to go out and watch polls. That's scary as shit, man. How is that even,
that cannot be legal. He's also backed himself into a corner
with how he performed in this last debate.
I don't think you can go to,
he can go to a debate and not do what he did this time.
I don't think so either.
If he doesn't try to interrupt
and doesn't try to be disruptive
and doesn't try to show, you know,
quote unquote dominance on the stage,
he's going to be looked at from his base as weak.
And that's a bad place to be.
So I know that there's going to be somebody out there
who's going to lap his cum up no matter where it's at, right?
It doesn't matter what it lands on,
they're going to lap it up.
But the fact is, is that there's going to be some people
that are going to look at it and be turned off by it
and say, oh gosh, he looks weak there.
He looks really weak.
And that may cause people not to vote for Biden, but to stay home. And that could be really bad for him. And the
fact that he's going to, if he doesn't come in with guns blazing again and look like a total
asshole again to suburban moms, who are the people he should be trying to fucking flip,
it's going to go real bad for him two times in a row. And if I were Biden, I wouldn't agree to
another one. I would say, go fuck yourself. Yep. The thing is like, he's trying to paint Biden with,
like you said, with, with this brush of being this radical socialist. Nobody buys it. Nobody
on the left buys it. Nobody, nobody, none of the attacks that he, I actually think Biden to be,
I mean, he's not my favorite policy candidate, but he is the perfect candidate to be running right now against Trump because he's like, I think, I think if you look at the other people
that we had, you had, you know, a, a socialist Jewish guy, there's a million things Trump could
throw at that guy, right? There's a million fucking racists and anti-Semites and people
who are afraid of the isms, you know, that are going to be afraid of Bernie. I mean, I think
Bernie's policies are better for America. I don't, but I don't think he could win
against Trump. I don't think America's ready for a woman. I wish we were, but we did a real bad job
proving that to me in 2016. So, you know, I have my fucking doubts and I think Trump has the ability
to attack people based on their minority status in a uniquely vile and uncivil way, which until we get
out of this era of Trumpian politics, I don't think we have an option, to be perfectly frank,
of really actually electing against Trump anyone other than a fucking white centrist.
And so I'm okay with it. I'm fine because all that matters is not having Trump for four more years. And then we can figure shit out. He's the only one who doesn't have to walk
on a knife's edge, right? Everyone else is going to have to walk on a knife's edge. The women,
especially, we're going to have to be on an absolute knife's edge, never show emotion,
but also don't look too cold. There's all these fucking like impossible standards that they make
women live up to when
they go to debates, because if not, they're too shrill or they're too weak or they're too, you
know, they didn't have their makeup on right. Or what, you know, it's all the, there's a million
things that you can attack a woman for after the debate. Whereas most guys that shit rolls off
their back like a duck, but, but, but even most of the dudes were going to have a harder time.
Yeah. I think also Buttigieg would have done a really good job against him.
And Buttigieg was a centrist, right?
So I think, you know, he probably would be my second choice in this particular area,
except for he didn't have any real experience.
So you're right.
I think Biden is the absolute real person to take on this role,
even though he was like my second to last choice
in the primaries.
He's the second to last.
Yeah, I voted for Biden in the primary
after Super Tuesday didn't go,
but I was like, okay, that's,
to me, it's like, it's a strategy,
it's always a strategy thing against Trump.
Like Trump is the, Trump is the problem.
Trump is ruining,
like he is literally ruining America. He is breaking our democracy. Four more years of Trump could upend American democracy in ways that are difficult for us to come back from. What matters isn't getting Medicare for all now. I mean, it matters. Don't get me wrong. I desperately want that to happen for America. But nothing good, nothing good, and only bad things will happen if we cannot get rid of Trump. element of minority and attack that element of minority in a way that would polarize and
galvanize the right and galvanize some people who were, you know, like, I mean, you got Kamala
Harris is a black woman. That's troublesome in America. I mean, if we learn anything from this
year, it's like America's got a fucking race problem, a bad, bad fucking race problem.
Cory Booker would face a similar difficulty,
although half of it because he's a black man
instead of a black woman.
I think he'd be a great president.
I think Kamala Harris would be a great president,
but I think Trump could mobilize people against him
because of his color.
I think Pete Buttigieg being a gay man
would be easy for Trump to mobilize people
against him because of it.
I think you've got Elizabeth Warren is a woman, again, problematic because America's shitty.
You kind of need right now, you kind of need a moment where we reset back to a place where
we're civil again, where we can stand up and have a disagreement, where we don't scream
over each other, where we don't talk about
like, yeah, just fucking break the entire election process in order to wedge it from my own personal
gain. Like this shit is unprecedented. And I think we do have to treat it in a way that's like, yeah,
all that matters is winning. The only thing that makes any difference right now is winning.
And I thought Biden did a better than I expected job of taking him on head to head.
I agree. I think so too. I think he did a better than expected job. Although I will say this,
I pretty much expected what was going to happen, although I didn't expect it to the level that it
was going to happen. I thought for sure he was going to interrupt and I thought he was going
to do it a lot, but I did not think that Trump was going to do it as much as he did. I was very
shocked at how he would not let up at some points. I mean, it was one of those like, sit on your own side of the car screaming fight
with a child at a certain point. It was an embarrassment, like a genuine cringy embarrassment
to watch him constantly never let him get a word in edgewise. And it proves that Trump doesn't have
anything to say because if you're good at debate and you know, you, you know, your subject and you know,
you're right. You let the other person say something wrong so you can hammer it. Right.
He wasn't even letting him say anything. And so, and, and, you know, all the points that Trump
makes are so vapid and lame. One of the things he keeps saying over and over again about COVID,
where he keeps talking about, you know, I was the first one to close the country down. And, you know, like, yeah, that's because it's your job to close the country down. That's dumb. But then also when we look at why we have a lot of COVID cases, it's certainly not because we closed the country down and saved ourselves from a massive influx of COVID cases from other countries, you know, yeah, maybe closing down the borders at a certain point is smart, but we have ourselves to blame when you look at us versus the rest of the world on why
we're not good at it. Right. Why we're not, why we're, why we're dying from it. Why there's more
cases here than anywhere else in the world. Like why that is. And that's, that's because we are
bad at it. Not because we somehow have open borders or closed borders or whatever. Well,
because we somehow have open borders or closed borders or whatever well and also like nobody gives a shit what you did in february or march like yeah he keeps harping back on like the the
handful of of initiatives that he really took happened at the very beginning of the pandemic
so he closed the border with with uh china and he closed the border with europe and then after that
he can't name a single fucking thing that he's done.
And that becomes increasingly apparent, right?
And you just push on it.
Like, yeah, well, why do we have
700,000 active cases
and 200,000
dead people?
It didn't work.
You have to do something other than just that.
He talks about how he closed
the country. He didn't close the country.
He like, he didn't shut down.
The states all had their own independently laid out.
Everybody did their own thing.
Yeah.
He can't name anything that he did that has a timeline after April or May.
Right.
Cause he talks about like, oh, I built some ventilators and I got PPE out.
That is, that's great.
The federal government should in in an emergency, mobilize
its vast resources in order to produce equipment for people and distribute it. That I think is a,
that is a minimum job requirement. It's sort of like, yeah, I showed up at nine. Well,
your fucking shift starts at nine. Like, what do you, you want me to suck your dick because you
showed up to work on time? Get the fuck out of here. It's like, it'd be like, if you said like,
oh my God, like we had this terrible thing happen
and it's going to be all hands on deck
and it's going to be this really awful day at work.
You're like, cool, I'll be there on time.
And you're like, you're not even going to show up
early and fucking help out?
He's naming
minimum
expectation shit that he hasn't done
fuck all with for six months and being like,
aren't I fucking amazing? Everybody should fucking love me. Well, and the other thing that he hasn't done fuck all with for six months and being like, aren't I fucking amazing? Everybody should fucking love me.
Well, and the other thing that he's constantly doing every single moment that COVID comes up
is he turns to Biden and says, you'd have lost more people. The more people would have died.
And you're just like, that's the dumbest, like your rubber, I'm glue bullshit.
Whatever, however that goes. I'm rubber, you're glue, not the other way around. But it's such stupid,
it's such a stupid, childish tactic to be like,
well, you'd have lost more people
because you're a big farty face.
And you're just like, get the fuck out of here, man.
Plus it's like, you know,
you have no idea if that would have happened.
He wasn't in charge.
You're like, you're prognosticating
what somebody else would have done
in a position of authority
that they do not hold and did not hold.
Yeah, it's the lamest argument.
Bonkers.
We got to talk about the trees.
We got to talk about the forestry management shit.
He did it again.
He said the exact same.
He said literally the exact same thing
that there are forest cities of Endor
across the ocean.
And there's too many leaves on the ground
in the forest.
Yeah.
He is confused about the trees. Yeah. He is confused about the difference between forestry and landscaping.
Like his whole life, somebody has come along and fucking raked up the leaves and like trimmed down the old tree, you know, in front of the fucking estate that fell over.
And like he thinks that's how this stuff works like he has no idea that like
forests are hundreds and hundreds if not thousands of square miles of wilderness do you think you're
gonna have like well we're gonna send a bunch of people into fucking yosemite with fucking rakes
and shovels and like okay guys if you see any fallen trees,
pick them up.
What I love is that
you have to start, Tom.
You have to start
at one side of Yosemite
and then you have to keep raking
until you get to the other side
of Yosemite.
So it's a long way to go.
But if you can rake up
a big pile of leaves like that,
Snoopy will jump into those leaves
and they will fly into the air.
Can you imagine how amazing jumping into that pile of leaves would be?
Oh gosh.
You die because you get sucked down to the bottom.
The friction would just start a giant leaf fire.
It's falling in a grain well or whatever.
You know, you're like fucking in a grain silo or something.
You're going to die inside of there.
Let's talk though, before we move on from Trump,
because we have funny stories we want to get to.
So I don't want to spend like the whole hour talking about this. Do you think that
there was any points that Biden could have done better? Yeah. I think he should have done more of
what he did a little bit that he should have done more of is he should have done more talking
directly to the people about the people. I think he did engage Trump directly with criticism of Trump
a little more than he should have. There were a couple of times that I thought were particularly
powerful where he looked at the camera and he said, he doesn't care about you. This is about
you. This is about your future. He really had a responsibility to lay out as much as he could,
given the circumstances, lay out his vision for the future. Biden, as much as we bag on him for
not being as far left as we are, he's got good ideas that the American people would respond to.
If you look at his website, you look at, like, where he's at
and what he wants to accomplish.
Those are important for the people to know.
You know?
And had he spent a little more time,
you know, literally,
if he just put his hand up and said,
I'm going to tell the American people
what they want to hear.
And that's about what I'm going to do
when I'm president.
But I also think the debate
wasn't structured that way.
Yeah.
He didn't have an opportunity to talk his platform,
talk about his platform.
I think when he talked about his sons,
that was a fucking non-starter.
Like when he talked about his sons,
Hunter and Bo,
like that just,
I,
that was just a non,
like,
as soon as he did that,
I'm like,
why are you fucking feeding the animal next to you?
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Why would you even-
It was a huge faux pas by Trump, though,
by bringing up Hunter after he was talking about Beau, though.
Oh, yeah.
Because he's trying to hammer the fact that Trump called military people
losers and suckers, and Trump wanted to go on
and continue on to attack his son, Hunter, and kept doing it.
Yeah.
Which is terrible for Trump.
It's not great.
Like you said, it's not great for Biden,
but it's certainly not good for Trump.
I will say that I felt that Biden
needed to be a little more forceful early on.
I know he was trying to be presidential,
but at a certain,
and I liked the parts where he turned around and said,
will you shut up? Just like I, because it's like at that point, like I, I liked the parts where he turned around and said, will you shut up?
Just like I,
because it's like at that point,
like all bets are off anyway.
You know what I mean?
Like he's just,
he's just fucking,
he's just,
he's a noise machine at that point.
He's a white noise generator.
There's nothing you can say to that guy.
He's doing the thing where he's pretending not to touch you as a little kid.
It's,
it's so annoying and it's so childish.
And just to be,
to call him a clown. I thought it was perfect. I was like, yeah, he's a little kid. It's so annoying and it's so childish. And just to call him a clown,
I thought it was perfect. I was like, yeah, he's a fucking clown. He is an absolute clown.
He's ridiculous. And to point that out is perfectly fine. And I saw him catch himself
a couple of times. And I think he just needs to say, I don't want him to turn into Trump.
Don't get me wrong. I don't want him to turn into Trump. Because I really did like that he stopped
and talked to the American people. I did like that. He kept his cool and was able to at least
name a single policy that he had on like Trump, who just would say the other guy would do worse
than me. And I don't have a plan. I know basically it's what he said. I like that he got an hour.
I will say, I liked that Biden kept saying he doesn't have a plan about this. He doesn't have
a plan. He'll never tell you the plan. And Trump would say some shit,
be like, see, there's no plan.
He really, I don't mean to interrupt you,
but he did the emperor has no clothes shtick
to him a few times.
And I thought he did a good job with that.
So I'm sorry.
I think that's where he needs to be though.
I do want to talk quickly about Trump's taxes
that came out,
the story that broke this week about Trump's taxes.
It came out that the story that broke this week about Trump's taxes. It came out that Trump is fucking broke
and it's the funniest fucking shit
I've heard in a long time.
Tom, my favorite part about all this
is that there was so many people before Trump came
and these are those fucking arm swinging dipshits
who are all like,
I love myself some street smarts
and who needs them book smarts?
And I don't need them book smarts. What I want is businessman. Give me that businessman.
Businessman going to run this country swinging my arms. That's what I'm doing right now.
If you can't see me swinging my arms, I am swinging my arms. I'm an arm swinging swinger.
That's what I do. And these fucking all these little idiots out there. Oh my God. The fact
that you got taken by a fucking grifter and you bought the biggest lemon on the lot is just so fucking delicious to me because it's been rumored for
a long time that he's broke, right? It's been rumored for a long time by a lot of different
people where, you know, and I don't know that it was that he's broke, but it certainly has been
rumored for a long time that he is not as affluent as he plays off. He says he's a billionaire. Yeah.
Where's the billions?
It's like that old lady looking in the sandwich,
where's the fucking beef?
You know what I mean?
Where's the billions at?
He hasn't ever really produced that.
And the fact that he lost so much money that he only paid $750 in taxes,
and the fact that he's now on the hook
for hundreds of millions of dollars in debt
uh is is one of those things that's so delicious to watch because it's like you fucking you thought
you had it you thought you were smart you were had by a grifter and now you've got to cope with
that in your own head you know and and also creates a talking point that's impossible for
him to escape. And it
happened during the debate. It gets
brought up that he's
essentially valueless. And it's worse than
just having no money.
We'll talk about that in a second, but
then it's like, all right, fine.
If it's not true, release your
tax returns. You can change it.
And now that is an
inescapable box
to paint him in.
He only has three choices.
Release his tax returns,
continue to call it fake news.
You know, well, actually,
no, that's it.
That's really the only choices
that he has, right?
Right.
That's it.
Or, I guess,
or acknowledge the truth
of the situation,
which, I mean,
that's so far-fetched
it didn't even occur to me.
Releasing the tax returns is acknowledging the truth of the situation because there's no way the far-fetched it didn't even occur to me. Releasing the tax returns
is acknowledging
the truth of the situation
because there's no way
the New York Times
is writing a fake story.
There's no fucking way
because he would own
the New York Times after that.
There's no fucking way
they're doing that.
They got those tax returns
because New York State
got those tax returns
and they fucking saw them
and then they printed them.
And they didn't print them,
but they printed what they saw.
And so fucking,
you could say that's fake news
from now until whenever,
but you're the only one
who's controlling the faucet
on whether or not
we have the knowledge on that.
You're the one.
No one else.
Because someone else made a claim.
It's real easy to prove.
Go prove it.
You know,
when you did this,
you did the same thing
to fucking Barack Obama.
Prove your citizenship.
Okay, here's my fucking
long form birth certificate.
Oh, I guess I don't have anything else to say. Do the same thing to us.
Show us your taxes. Show us your long form taxes, asshole. Let's see how that goes for you.
What's concerning, what should be of concern though, is like, it's not just that he's not a billionaire. It's that, you know, he is very close to being broke. He owes $420 million at
least in loan repayment. And he's not worth a fuck all. If you're taking those kind of losses,
one, you're not a very good businessman, right? I mean, losing money at that rate is not the sign
of a successful business person. But also being literally hundreds of millions of dollars in debt means that he is likely to be leveraged by foreign powers, right?
Who have control of his business interests in other parts of the world.
Even in my goofy business, even in my silly little nothing job with very little power,
one of the things they do when you reach a certain place in your career is they run a credit report
as part of the hiring process. It's part of your background check. And you're not going to be
somebody who, like for my company, gets added to the escrow account or signs checks or has a
fiduciary responsibility if you you're over-leveraged,
if you've got bad credit, because it makes you an easy target, right? Who's most likely to steal
or be leveraged by ne'er-do-well, so to speak, right? It's somebody who's over-leveraged because
desperation creates a need to build opportunity, right? Absolutely. So we have a president who's $420 million in debt.
Those fucking chips are going to be called at some point.
And he's clearly leveraging his presidency for personal gain.
He's done it since day one.
He's done it since the beginning.
None of that is surprising.
We don't have to go into all the ways he's done that.
But these tax returns show a deeply vulnerable president.
It's not just that he's a liar,
which he is.
It's not just that he's like
terrible at actually running a business
for all those idiots
who for reasons
fucking unfathomable to me
have decided that like,
well, you know,
if you can run a business,
you can run a country.
Like that is the dumbest sentence
anybody's ever said out loud.
They don't co-relate in any meaningful way.
But like, not only are those people wrong, but you also have a president who's incredibly, incredibly vulnerable.
And we should be worried about that level of personal vulnerability.
That's a fucking real problem.
That's a scary problem.
That's a scary problem.
The big part about that vulnerability, Tom,
is that a lot of that debt comes due in what would be, if he got elected,
his second term.
So while he is the president of the United States,
possibly, right?
There's a possibility he's the president in three years.
That debt becomes now something
that they're coming to look to collect.
And how do you not, like you said,
you know, you have this,
when you're pushed to the edge,
you're gonna, you might do something
that's a little shady.
And he's already proven that he's willing to do that now
without, you know, really being pushed to the edge.
Can you imagine where he's at in a couple of years?
And you know, the other thing that he talks about,
when everybody talks about how great a businessman he is
and how great an economy this is, he's essentially treated the U S economy
like his businesses. He's, he runs these, like he runs like a mob runs a business where I don't know
if you've seen good fellas, but in good fellas to talk about that one moment where the guy gets an
ownership in the restaurant and they start basically ordering shit on credit and then selling it
out the back door at half the price. And then they eventually light the place on fire and collect the
insurance money. And that's exactly what he's doing with the United States. He's running it
into the ground. We have way more debt than we ever had before. He's, he's basically just,
he's basically just like propping up all these systems to make it look like it's the same thing
as if you buy a house that you can't afford look like it's the same thing as if you buy a
house that you can't afford. He's doing the same thing with our government and he's been doing this
forever with his own personal finances. And now he's doing it with all our money. So we all kick
into the kitty and he's doing it with all our money too. And so, you know, it's, it's even worse
than we thought in the sense that, you know, yeah, you, like you say, you hired a grifter,
but you hired a grifter that is bad at business and he's doing the same bad things that he's been doing all along to all
of us. Yep. Well, like it shouldn't be surprising, right? Because a company exists to create wealth
for the top. So a company exists to drive wealth up to the top, up to its management, to its
executives. That is how a company structures itself.
And it structures itself that way because the fucking decision makers who build the company are the guys at the top.
So they're never going to build a company as the decision makers and structure it in a way that does not benefit them overarchingly, right?
Right. overarchingly, right? We are building an economy. By building an economy that primarily focuses on
the robustness of the markets, rather than by reducing wealth inequality and by providing
high quality, good paying jobs for the middle class, we are exactly creating a nation that
mimics a business. We are driving the wealth to the top.
We're doing the things that you do.
Like, what does a company do when it starts to flounder?
Well, you lay people off.
Why do you lay people off?
Well, because you can just put a little more work
on the remaining employees.
They're going to suck it up
and be glad they've still got work.
You save some money, and then what do you do?
It drives wealth up to the top.
It increases the bottom line. It drives wealth up to the top. It increases the bottom line.
It drives wealth up to the top.
We're building a country that mimics the same model that businesses have,
but that is not a model that is good for the long term,
and it's not a model that's good for the people that work there.
It's a model that is exclusively built for the people at the top.
Anybody who thinks that we should run a country like you run a business literally doesn't
know how businesses get run.
You've never, and I actually don't blame people because they've probably never been in position
to be the decision maker in a company, right?
I hear that fucking phrase.
Never have I heard that phrase from somebody who's actually a decision maker at a major
company, right?
You hear that from people down at the bottom because they deify those that are in charge of them.
People in charge must know more.
That's why they're in charge and I'm not.
They have to be smarter.
They have to be better because otherwise I would be in charge.
Otherwise, I'd be the millionaire.
So the fact that I'm not in charge and I'm not the millionaire means these people must know better.
Yeah, but they fucking don't.
They just got luckier.
That's literally the only thing that separates most people from a path of success to a path that is less successful.
One of you guys just got luckier.
That's fucking it.
That's that's it for most of America.
It's fucking luck.
But we don't like that, because it's difficult.
Where am I?
What the hell is that?
Oh my God, is that?
What?
Gary, where the hell are we?
What?
Who?
What is happening? It's... Oh my gosh!
Whoa, that was close. What the fuck?
You need to bring this message back to the past.
Okay, but
what is happening? You need to
warn the past about the DAPs.
About the what? The DAPs.
They took over. Who is that?
You called it DAP in your time!
My God! How did this happen?
Long ago, the nations lived together in harmony.
Then everything changed when the DAP nation attacked.
Only the WAPs, master of all foreplay elements, could stop them.
Wait, what happened to the WAPs of my time?
People stopped using Code Glory.
What? They dried glory. What?
They dried up.
Why?
Did they not know they get 50% off almost any one item?
And free shipping.
Delivered discreetly to your door.
This is the problem, Ian.
You need to go back and tell them about adamandneve.com.
Are my ads not working?
Am I not reaching anyone?
Ian, get a hold of yourself.
You have to get back to the future.
You mean past?
Yes.
Jump in the time machine over there.
Wait, Gary, you're saying you built a time machine out of a carton of Neapolitan ice cream?
No, not that, you dumb fuck.
It's the big time machine looking thing over there.
Then what's with all the ice cream?
Neapolitan ice cream is the only thing left in the future.
Horrible.
Watch out!
There's a Shapironator!
Go, go!
Warn them!
They need to keep it wet!
Use Toad Glory!
I won't fail you, Gary!
What the hell happened to you, Otis?
Poison Ivy out back, maybe?
Where is she?
No, they're not my parents.
They're trying to trick you.
The worms are in their brains.
Yeah, this story is actually pretty fucked up this story is from the guardian texas residents warned of tap water tainted with brain-eating microbes brain-eating
microbe 2020 that's what's gonna be on my shirt tonight but i couldn't get it in time
so this after a six-year-old kid died, Texas officials have warned residents of some communities near Houston.
And I thought, like, of course it's fucking near Houston.
Of course it's near Houston.
Makes sense.
Stop using their tap water because it might be tainted with a deadly brain-eating amoeba.
You're not supposed to use your tap water for any reason except for to flush toilets in Lake Jackson, Freeport, Angleton, Brazoria, Richwood,
Oyster Creek, Clute, and Rosenberg. That's about 120,000 people, including a couple of prisons,
a Dow chemical factory in Freeport, two state prisons, 2,400 inmates.
The fuck are the inmates supposed to do? What the fuck are the inmates supposed to do?
Well, you know,
this is one of those things, too.
I was reading the story and they were talking about
this normally gets handled
because of chlorine.
So, chlorine in the water
is one of the things
that I guess handles it normally.
Right.
And, you know,
this is one of those moments
where you look at all those people
who will say things,
talk about how bad chlorine is for you.
Right, right.
And you look and you say,
yeah, but I don't want a fucking brain-eating amoeba.
How about that?
Like, I'd much rather have a little chlorine in my system
than a fucking brain-eating amoeba, folks.
Yeah, we have to treat our fucking tap water,
you lunatics.
Like, it's like the fucking raw milk people.
You know, like, oh, I'm going to have some raw,
unpasteurized milk.
It's like, great.
You go ahead with that. I will be drinking milk that nobody gets diarrhea from. That's what I'm
going to do. I'm going to drink milk and then I'm going to have solid shits. That's what I'm going
to do. Like, what the fuck? Like, like we live in this crazy time, Cecil, where there's like,
there is like a pushback against like the pushback against the wonders of modernity,
as if they're a problem.
And it's like, no.
For a long time, clean drinking water was a real fucking tragedy.
And still, in huge parts of the world, lack of access to clean drinking water is a major killer.
It is a major killer of people all across the world.
And we're just like,
yeah, but you know, I don't want the chlorine in there.
It's the problem of being too successful.
Right.
Yeah, it's the problem of being just way too much success
at making sure that nobody gets sick off drinking water
eventually makes people think all water is therefore safe.
Same thing happens with disease.
When we do the same thing with vaccines,
you're a victim of your own success.
Nobody has gotten sick here for a long time.
And gosh, those measles weren't so bad, were they?
Well, let's stop doing it.
And then, you know, then you run into problems.
And there's no like,
there's no comparative analysis at all, right?
It's everything is,
because the reality is that like,
all luxury and all tragedy is relative. But if you look at
things on an absolute scale, it's like, well, I mean, I want to be able to drink water that is
perfectly safe, not relatively safe. Well, you're never going to do that. Just get that. That's
stupid. Get that shit out of your head. We don't live in perfection. We're never going to live in
a society or world, a community, a country that has that as its standard. So if that's your standard,
you have a dumb ass fucking standard. What we have is you shit in the cleanest, safest drinking
water the world has ever known. That's what you shit in. And we're just like, well, but there's
a little like a little chlorine after aftertaste my brain did not
get eaten by an amoeba
though
I should probably
get the fuck
out of here
run it through
a fucking Brita
if you want to
change the way
it tastes
like just
what the fuck
the scariest shit
is the brain eating
amoeba itself
is just terrifying to me
that's a terrifying thing
and the fact that
you know I mean
you know that it's
supposed to live in certain areas I guess it doesn't it doesn't live up here right it's too terrifying thing. And the fact that, you know, I mean, you know that it's supposed to live in certain areas.
I guess it doesn't live up here, right?
It's too cold up here for the amoebas or something.
It's like only in the, I've only heard about it
in the southern states. I've never heard about it.
It's typically a warm water thing, like warm
still water. Yeah. And so
it happens down like in places like Texas
and whatnot where people go swimming in these
still areas.
Like you say, the small lakes, ponds,
little things like that.
And they catch this thing
and it fucking eats you. I mean, it eats your fucking
brain? The fuck, man?
That's like nightmare fuel.
I would feel terrible starving the amoebas to death
like that. Yeah, I know, right?
I would feel so bad for them.
They'd be like,
waiter!
Seconds! We had a reservation. I'd feel so bad for him. I'd be like, Waiter! Waiter!
Seconds!
I thought,
we had a reservation.
There's,
I mean,
clearly no service here.
At the river mouth,
the bears catch only the tastiest,
most tender salmon.
Which is exactly
what we at John West want.
John West endured the worst
to bring you the best.
This story comes from
somersetlive.co.uk
and I grabbed this story
because last week we talked about
how the whales were,
the whales were just done
with humanity.
You know, the whales
are attacking the boats
and now the polar bears are attacking our helicopters nature nature has just decided it is straight up going after us
it's fucking done soon cecil the trees will make us all commit suicide the trees the trees from the
forest cities that we have is that what's gonna happen a helicopter assembled by leonardo helicopters which i think is fucking great by
leonardo helicopter what leonardo helicopter you can damage it but its heart goes on oh
that's oh that's good they should have leonardo's ornithopters actually that would be even better
um helicopters the reason why you can fly a leonardo helicopter is because you're the aviator. That's why.
Leonardo helicopters,
they dump you after you turn 25. Wait, no, that's
a...
Was it attacked by a bear? It was attacked by
a wolf of Wall Street. That makes sense.
Okay.
So this thing is a Sable Leonardo helicopter
that's been attacked by a polar bear in Canada.
The Canadians apologized
briefly to the polar bear after the attack.
The CH-149 Cormorant...
Sorry.
Game on.
Sorry there.
We didn't mean to put our helicopter
there near your bear family, eh?
Sorry.
The CH-149 Cormorant helicopter
was left damaged by the curious animal
after the incident in Quebec.
The Royal Canadian Air Force has confirmed
staff on training exercise left the aircraft
parked at the remote Seglik Airport
near to the Labrador Sea.
Crushed it.
Which fetches the other seas.
Yeah.
And returned to find huge muddy paw prints
across the outside of the helicopter
and a side window
and pushed into the aircraft
by the animal
and other minor damage
had been caused.
Did they call it a bad boy?
You're a bad boy.
You're a bad boy.
They go up to it
and they're like,
you better wipe your paws off
before you touch this again.
I got to wipe your paws off
every time you come in
from the rain.
Every single time.
Oh, God.
You can't fucking park
a helicopter anywhere
without just getting attacked by a polar bear,
eaten by a leopard seal.
This poor bear comes floating in,
emaciated on its iceberg that's floating.
Just sees the helicopter.
It's like, I'm so hungry.
I have to eat something.
Who just leaves the wrapper?
Why would somebody just leave a wrapper out here?
It's like eating the outside of a fucking
TV dinner.
It's like, I can't even get in this thing.
It's like drinking all the milk and putting the container
back in the fridge. Like, it's just a dick move.
You're going to leave a helicopter without any
people in it?
What's a fucking hungry polar bear supposed to do?
Where do I always stay? Stay on
the inside.
No backsies, no penny taxis what you ain't supposed
to talk jinks double jinks triple jinks googleplex damn this story comes from australian jewish news
airborne yom kippur ritual for locked down melbourne jews this is the fucking dumbest
shit this is fucking,
this is, I love it so much though.
I got to read this thing.
This is just,
I love it so much.
Fucking bonkers.
These are the same people.
These are the same people though
that are like
super worried about
taking an elevator.
Do you remember the story
or whatever where they,
they have to,
there's a certain type
of elevator switch
that they can use
and other ones they can't
because the electrical current
or something. It's crazy.
There is no people
that are more
letter of the law rather
than spirit of the law than like the super
observant Jews. Like they
are just like, all right, you know who
fucking loves some paperwork? Jewish
God. Jewish God is like,
oy vey, you got me in a loophole.
What? I love that their God is so easy to trick. He's the creator of the whole universe, but God is like, Oy vey, you got me in a loophole. What? I love that their
God is so easy to trick. He's the
creator of the whole universe, but he's like,
Oh, you fucking got me with that
elevator. God, I wasn't fucking thinking
when I created the universe ahead of time.
He got me with that elevator.
Damn it. Do you see they strung that
wire up around their neighborhood and now they don't
have to follow any of my rules within the wire.
So smart, these guys man a melbourne pilot took to the skies with three chickens
melbourne thank you very much i'm sorry let me let me reread that you got to read it you got to
change it good eye sounds nothing like you sound like you're having a stroke another dialect even when we were in
australia like i just could never i could never get the hang of their like ignore some of the
letters and mush their fucking language together they had a weird cadence too they were hard to
follow not as hard to follow as the scottish the scottish were the worst i couldn't they
know scottish is my in my opinion opinion, the Scottish didn't even speak English.
I couldn't understand a word they were saying.
That is just a guttural, like when we were in Scotland,
I'm still not sure of anything that was said to us
the entire time.
I was lucky because two or three people
played my interpreter that weekend and it was wonderful.
But the rest of the time I was just befuddled,
absolutely befuddled.
There was four or five times that people came up to me and they would say something and the rest of the time, I was just befuddled, absolutely befuddled. There was four or five times
that people came up to me
and they would say something
and I would stop and say,
I am very sorry,
but what did you just say?
When we were in Glasgow,
I went in the morning
and I worked out at a CrossFit in Glasgow.
And like, it was just me
and like the coach was there
because it was like an open gym time or whatever.
And like, I'm just doing my thing.
And he would just like look over at me once in a while and just yell some whatever fucking
Scottish gibberish at me.
And I'm like, I don't, I don't know if that's motivating or if I'm doing something wrong.
Like maybe he's got a chicken bone in his throat.
I have no idea.
It could be all three of these things.
All right.
Let me try to read it again.
A Mel, Melbourne, try to read it again. A Melbourne.
Melbourne.
A Melbourne pilot.
A Melbourne pilot.
A meal-born pilot.
Took to the skies with three chickens on Sunday
to carry out a pre-Yom Kippur ritual
that was otherwise off-limits for the city's locked-down Jews.
This makes me so happy.
I love it.
Caporat, practiced by some Orthodox Jews,
involves swinging a live chicken over one's head.
Three times.
Not once.
Not twice.
But three.
Three is the number of the swinging chickens above your head.
The chicken starts going like the chicken starts going,
it's like,
whoa,
whoa,
whoa.
Okay,
thank God that's over.
Holy shit,
what the fuck was that?
You just grabbed
this fucking confused bird.
Well,
I mean,
well,
the thing is,
the chicken doesn't have long
to live after that though
because they kill it
immediately after.
They do.
So they sway,
it involves swinging
a live chicken over
one's head three times
and reciting a prayer to transfer the sin, your sins to the bird.
The chicken is then slaughtered and donated to the poor.
That's my other favorite part.
It's like, all right, this chicken is full of some shit that I have done.
I am not eating it.
I'll tell you what.
This is a dirty ass fucking chicken.
This chicken is filled with glory holes in math.
Who wants it?
Pretty ass fucking chicken.
This chicken is filled with glory holes in math.
Who wants it?
What a fucking weird thing to do.
One, we were talking about God earlier.
Their God is up there.
He's like, I'm going to get you.
You said, oh, you put the sins in the chicken?
Why did I think of that?
Fuck.
You put the sins in the chicken?
Oh, God, I'm such an idiot. I didn't realize the chicken. Oh, my God, they put the sins in the chicken oh god i'm such an idiot i didn't realize the lime in the coconut i didn't think a chicken was a sponge that could just soak up sins so well you guys
are smart man some poor fucking chickens like in hell for adultery and it's just like what
it's just like clucking around his fucking head.
Like,
I don't even,
I didn't even do it.
I didn't even do it.
I lived my whole life
without any cock
and somehow I ended up
down here for adultery.
No.
This year with large gatherings
off limits
because of the coronavirus,
those who practice the ritual
have struggled
with how to carry it out.
A Brooklyn organization
is offering to deliver chickens to people's homes in israel that's just yeah like um door-to-door
sin chickens like grub it's a different kind of grub it's a different kind of grub it's like the
little grub that a chicken would eat i guess is the grub hub that you would use the lorem there
right yeah in melbourne the entire city is locked down. So an enterprising
philanthropist with access to an airplane decided
to conduct a symbolic version.
And I thought, it's all symbolic.
What do you mean a symbolic version?
As opposed to the literal version?
Like, holy shit. Like you get off the
scale and you weigh like three sins
lighter afterwards.
You're right.
Show me your sins beforehand and then show me your sins afterwards. Oh, look at that. They're right. Show me your sins beforehand
and then show me your sins afterwards.
Oh, look at that.
They're all stuck to this chicken.
Fucking feathers turn black or whatever.
So stupid.
Decided to conduct a symbolic version
above the heads of all Melbourne's Jews
by flying with chickens in circles above the city.
The hour-long, low-altitude flight
circled over suburbs with large Jewish populations,
including Caulfield and St. Kilda. The plane carried three chickens, two male and one female, traditional for men to swing male
chickens and for women to swing hens. I don't think anyone here- They only sin half as much,
so that's why there's only one, there's one less. That makes sense. Okay. Yeah. Women sin half as,
women are half as sinful. That makes sense. That checks. That checks. Yeah, sure. And I like this
part too, because it's even better.
It's even more pointless,
the very last line.
I don't think anyone here thinks that they could be yoits
having fulfilled one's ritual obligations
with the foul flyover,
but it was definitely a nice start to the day.
What the fuck?
Wait, did they kill the chickens in the plane?
I don't know.
And they just like drop them on the poor from above?
Yeah.
Maybe they just make the chickens jump.
Like that's how they kill them.
Jump.
They fly, right?
Oh, no, they don't.
No, look at that.
I just dropped a chicken from there.
What a horrible, dumb ritual.
I mean, it's just a horrible, dumb ritual.
Not only do you scare the shit out of the chicken ahead of time,
then you kill it afterwards like an asshole.
I don't understand how anybody in modern times is like,
yeah, I definitely need to get rid of some sins
by transferring them to a chicken.
What the fuck?
Say that shit out loud.
Joe, did you transfer your sins to a chicken this weekend?
You seem so light on your feet.
You seem like the world is your oyster again, Joe.
Way to go.
I don't even get it.
Can you do that any time you sin?
What if you're just like, God damn, I've done some shit.
I got to wait six months before I can swing a chicken above my head?
I have been wrestling with some bad decisions
for a long time.
When is chicken swinging
sin transfer weekend or whatever?
Yeah. If you're rich, you just
drive around in your limo with a whole bunch of
chickens in the backseat that you can just use
whenever you
need them. You ever think about your kids
or your grandkids
sucking up their inheritance through
that fucked oxygen tube? And Benny's fucking intensive care? You fucks, I hate you, I hate
you both. I should, I should fucking vote. Just right now, I should fucking kill you
both! You're the fucking reason this country's going down the drain.
This story comes from the Orange County Register.
OC Sheriff's deputies who lied on reports testify
they didn't know that was illegal.
Lying on a report was illegal?
Sheriff's departments place new protocols
to ensure deputies understand they must book evidence
in a timely fashion.
Aren't these the guys that arrest people
for things that are supposed
to be legal or illegal and they don't
know that the thing they're doing is illegal?
It's not like they didn't.
Let's be clear about what happens here.
So what happened is they filled out a report
that said they booked some shit into evidence.
Then they didn't book
that shit into evidence.
And people were like, hey,
did you book that shit into evidence? And like, like, hey, did you book that shit into evidence? And
like, nah, we didn't do that. Well, you said you did. You wrote down that you did. That's illegal.
And they're like, well, no one told us we couldn't falsify reports. That is literally what their
attorney argued for them. And crazily, it kind of worked yeah they actually got a lesser sentence
they got a lesser sentence because they said like well you know i mean they weren't explicitly told
in any of their field training or other training that they couldn't falsify report this is the
sheriffs it's like it is self-evident that like lying on paper is the
wrong place at the very least to do your lying if you're gonna do some lying do lying like not on
the record not written down like what do you think like i filled out a report i just thought it was
like what i hoped happened like i feel like it's not fucking penthouse letters. It's not like here's like,
here's my fucking Christmas wishlist. It's a report of things that happened.
I was watching this, this show. Um, it was a recent frontline PBS frontline, uh, called
policing the police 2020. And it's a, it's a story and investigative report from a one gentleman,
uh, who's talking about sort of paying attention to how police officers are being, you know, being policed.
Specifically by like Department of Justice and other places.
And I guess during the Obama administration, they had made some strides forward with trying to make sure that police were more accountable and they were paying more attention.
make sure that police were more accountable and they were paying more attention. And then as soon as Jeff Sessions, the fucking Keebler elf got in there, he immediately canceled all that shit that
they were doing. Like they were, they were starting to trying to reform in some ways, paying attention
to how police handled their jobs. And when Jeff Sessions came in, he literally made a speech and
said, I'm a, I always have your back. I literally always have your back. So he's basically giving
them carte blanche to do whatever they
want, whenever they want, because he won't do anything
to them. And I was watching
this report, and
this guy goes out with these
police officers, this
reporter, and
they show these guys
run up to this, you know, because
they have a camera crew with them, just like cops, right?
Except for this camera crew isn't trying to this, you know, because they have a camera crew with them, just like cops, right? Except for this camera crew isn't
trying to find,
isn't trying to follow them like the police
officers do in that cops thing where they're running
after criminals or whatever. These guys are
filming you for, you know, because
you would have to imagine that it's not going to be
flattering, right? Right, yeah. Well, they're out there
with the police officers and these two
cops get out of the car and they
walk up to this guy who's walking and the guy's walking. He said, don't touch me. As he's walking,
he's walking towards the police and the police say, hey man. And he says, don't touch me. Don't
put your hands on me. And the cops walk up and they start to stop him. And he turns to keep walking
and they flip his ass on the ground. They put him in cuffs. They like freak out on him and they're
yelling at him. And he keeps on the whole time. He said, I'm not doing anything wrong.
And they said, you shouldn't walk away from us.
You can't walk away from us like that.
And he said, yes, I can.
I absolutely can.
I'm not, I wasn't doing anything wrong.
I was just going home.
You said, hey, what's up?
And I said, don't touch me.
I said, that was the conversation that happened.
And you threw me on the ground.
And they said, well, you need to pay attention to our orders.
He said, you didn't give me an order.
He said, you just said, you know, and so this all transpires on camera, right? It happens on camera. And so after it's over, the guy gets up, they let him go. And he says, you know, they have a little conversation with him and the guy didn't have anything on him. The guy wasn't doing anything wrong. And this police department was specifically out there trying to find guns in the neighborhood and they were essentially doing stop and frisk to anybody
that they thought had a gun and they would just throw them
on the ground or put them up against and they'd frisk them
and talk to them and they were a gang
unit that was essentially just trying to weed out
as many guns as they possibly could
and you know why stop that
at their manufacturer with laws or anything
anyway
the point
of the story is that the reason after this all transpires, the reporter goes to find the report on the file because he wants to see what they wrote down.
He wants to see how they –
Yeah, right.
How they documented it.
Yeah, by law, they're supposed to report this.
And he goes to go check it out, and they never filed the report.
They never filed it.
It was never put in the system
because,
and that,
you know,
that to me says
if they're willing to do that
in front of a camera
that you know for sure
is filming you
in an unflattering way,
there's no way
that doesn't happen
all the time.
There's no,
you cannot convince me
that that doesn't happen
all the fucking time.
Yeah,
there's no reason
to be convinced of that
because we've seen how many instances where like,
like the cops know they're on camera
and they behave badly.
And you're like, okay, well,
and if you're the police, you've got to know like,
yeah, I do that because 99.99% of the time,
nothing bad is going to happen to me.
Nothing happens to me.
I mean, how many instances during the 2020 protests, how many hundreds and hundreds of instances of unprovoked police brutality do we have that are documented on camera?
And nothing's going to happen to any of these people.
Nothing has happened to the vast majority because for the most part, they act with not, but absolute impunity in their behavior with the public.
It's grotesque.
Yeah.
I mean, the idea that like a couple of sheriff's deputies could actually make the claim and get a reduced sentence because they didn't know it was illegal to write down false shit on a fucking police report.
Yeah.
You know, I didn't.
Nobody ever said he couldn't lie.
That's a new one on us.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's ballsy
to even say it out loud.
So we want to thank
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Of course,
we want to thank
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We want to thank
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We can barely afford Ian with you guys.
We got a message about the civil story.
This is last week.
We talked about the app, the civil app,
where you could join up to help evict people
in a crowdsourcing way, which is very hip.
We got a message.
This one is from Brazen Honesty
who said, what do you
guys think of maybe somebody
also conceal carrying
and going to be somebody who was
using that app? Like, how bad
could this possibly get? And I
gotta say, you know, we talked a little bit
about, you know, the violence
that could happen, but we certainly didn't talk about it in an extensive way.
But violence is very possible at an eviction.
And I can see a scenario where somebody,
there's a certain kind of person who's looking for an opportunity or outlet for violence,
and they're looking for some excuse to inflict violence in ways that they don't get in trouble for and yet have entirely the upper hand in.
Which is why you carry a gun, right?
It's to have the upper hand.
So, yeah, I can see that happening.
I can absolutely see that happening.
It's one of the many horrors of outsourcing evictions to fucking random people.
It's, God.
Tom, Matt sends in a message talking about the WWE and contract workers.
Yeah, so this was an interesting message, and it's a long message, but basically, like,
these guys are contract.
They're not straight employees, and they sign a contract which limits the terms of their
employment so they can't take time off for being injured. They can't take time off
for being sick and still expect to be paid. They're hamstrung. They're basically treated,
I mean, like they're owned by the WWE. And that really is a problem with contract workers.
When you're a contract worker, especially when you're in a niche industry like entertainment,
and then a niche within a niche like the wrestling industry. But really, it accounts for any industry where the
employer has such a strong upper hand against the total number of people available to do that
employment, right? So there's a million people that if you post, if WD posts a thing for looking
for a wrestler, how many wrestlers are going to show up ready, willing and able to break their fucking bodies for a contract?
When that stuff happens, that means that the employer has the upper hand.
They write a contract that is in their favor and the employee does not have an opportunity to negotiate fair terms because they're on their back foot as the quote unquote employee.
Contract employees are notoriously subject
to the worst conditions possible
and the lowest treatment possible.
It's a shit.
And we're moving more and more toward contracting out labor,
contracting out all kinds of services.
And it's not all bad.
Don't get me wrong.
There are times when the employee in a contract basis
can have the upper hand or can have some closer parity with the employer. But there are many
circumstances where parity is not possible. And when that's the case, contract employees eat a
tremendous amount of shit. They eat a tremendous amount of shit because they have virtually no
workplace protections.
So we got a message from Glenda and Glenda was telling us a story
about how someone wound up getting killed
doing an eviction in another state
because they're very dangerous.
But Glenda also mentions that,
I don't know if we said this
and if we did, we said it in error.
She says, on the subject of landlords being okay,
I want to say this,
basically being able to survive the pandemic
and give their renters some sort of,
you know, to sort of lay off their renters
and let their renters sort of live for free
for a little while.
I want to say this.
I thought I was talking about the banks
when I said some things were going to be okay.
The banks should be fine, right?
The banks could, we could,
and also we could do things like
pass a coronavirus bill,
which makes sure that everybody's fine
and there won't be any people getting evicted
because we can make sure
that we could stop all those things from happening
by paying people money
and making sure that the money stays in the economy
instead of just, I don't know, just letting fucking like off to the races businesses go sign
up for as much money as they want to take and then just take whatever they want and then not do
anything with it or whatever like we did under Trump. So there's ways to create bills that could
help people, right? But I also want to say too, yeah, I get it. If you're just a regular dude and
you happen to own your house and you're renting out, yeah, I get it. If you're just a regular dude and you happen
to own your house and you're renting out the upstairs, or if you own a three flat and you
own live in the bottom or whatever, or even if you just have like one or two houses that that's
kind of your income, I get it. I understand that there's people out there that they need to make
that money too. So I don't want to make it sound like I was somehow coming down on the landlord out there. But if a landlord owns 50 properties, I suspect they're going to be okay
because chances are they probably know exactly how to handle something like this.
Yeah. I can speak from some experience on this. Again, I've been a landlord. I owned a house.
I rented it out for about eight years and it had its ups and downs.
It had mostly downs as a landlord.
It was not a uniquely positive experience.
And I get it.
Like, you know, at some point,
sometimes like a big source of necessary income
is that rent.
You need the rent to pay the mortgage against the house.
It's just, it's part of it.
So, and I know that most people that are landlords are small
landlords like other than like so you know i think cecil and i both you know i just want to emphasize
we get it um we do we get it the the point is not whether or not people who do not have means
should subsidize people who have also no means right the the point cecil and i were making i
think is that there are huge
corporations that can subsidize people who have lesser means during these downtimes. The reason
the landlord needs that income is because they've got fucking bills to pay too. So if we reduce
their bills by saying, hey, Bank of America and Chase and all the rest of these guys, you can't
collect on these mortgages, even if they're non-owner occupied properties during the course of the pandemic.
That allows landlords some flexibility to say, hey, I'll pass that on to you, my tenant, right?
Because I'm not going to eat shit. I don't need to make you eat shit either.
So instead we do nothing. We do exactly nothing. And we just, we hurt people.
Got a message from Brian.
He sent us in a Fireball eggnog.
I don't know that there's a way to make eggnog worse,
but it seems like they found it.
I mean, Fireball is so atrocious on its own.
Fireball is a horror.
Adding that to eggnog.
I don't know which made which worse.
Got a message from Elvis.
Elvis says there's a website
that happens to have every open bathroom in New York City.
So we'll post it on this week's show notes in case you need to
take a crap. I admit that you could
probably just stand between the giant piles
of garbage in New York City and just shit on the street.
How would anybody notice?
Plenty of privacy. Oh, plenty of privacy.
Just stand behind the giant mounds of
garbage on the street and you're good.
This one's from Fox. Fox asks if we
consume any left-wing
media. And he asks about that. I do. I listen to citations needed on occasion. I do not listen to
Chapo Trap House, but I have listened to a few of the podcasts and I do consume some information.
When we talk about left-leaning, I look at the Jacobin and other places like Intercept.
So I've read some,
and I read some of those farther left papers,
and I also read farther right sources.
I've looked at the Drudge Report.
I've looked at, you know,
Drudge Report's basically a right-leaning aggregator. And then there's also,
I look at the National Review on occasion.
I listen to Left, Right and Center,
which has a guy almost always from National Review on it.
So there's always someone
who's a right leaning person who's talking.
So I consume from both sides actually,
as much as I can.
I try to pay attention to both sides of the aisle
to see what other people are thinking
and how they're coming at particular issues.
So I almost always try to broaden my reach
as much as possible to try to see
what kind of information people are gleaning
from the same story.
We did get one person.
Celine says that Corgasms, they got them
and they're great.
Thank you.
The only person, a couple of people sent messages and said that they've heard of them or they came them, and they're great. Thank you. The only person, a couple people sent messages
and said that they've heard of them or they came close,
but they never had one.
So one person in our audience that admitted it.
So there you go.
This next one is from Steve,
and Steve has an interesting way to fix some of the issues
of lopsidedness in our government.
It's a solution that wouldn't take any constitutional change,
but help alleviate some of the issues.
One theory is that the size of the legislature
should always be near the cube root of the population.
Using this theory, this would give us 577 members
of the House of Representatives.
If you run the 2000 election results over
with the new electoral votes,
Al Gore wins the electoral college 347 to 329.
And that's even before adding in Puerto Rico and D.C.
It's an interesting idea.
I think it'll never happen.
I wish it would.
But I think just trying to explain to the American people what a cube root is, you've got an uphill battle.
You can't get people to use the metric system.
You can't get people to wear masks.
We've got...
Okay, guys, we're going to take the cube root of the population.
You've lost...
You've lost America
so bad.
I want to mention something, though. This week, I was curious
because Trump, one of the things that he
said this week was that, specifically, that America chose,
the majority of Americans chose,
we had the majority in the Senate,
and we have a Republican president,
and so they're allowed to choose
the next Supreme Court justice.
And that is true, technically.
But when he's talking about the majority,
I was thinking about it
and I was wondering,
yeah, they have that many people for a red Senate,
but how many people in the red Senate
are they representing?
And I basically looked at all the different states
and I threw out anybody that was split.
So any state that had a split,
that had a red and a blue,
I threw that state out.
That state didn't get added to the total population because I figured if it's a red and a blue, they'll probably
split down the middle. And so that population is essentially halved. So why keep it? No reason.
I added them all up in the different columns. And the red states, even though they're more
red states, they represent 14 million fewer people than the blue states. The blue states that are in the thing that are,
that are the number of blue states that are,
that have two blue senators represent 14 million people more than states that
have two red senators.
And so that shows you like not just the house of representatives,
which is skewed again,
specifically toward places that,
you know,
shouldn't have,
that don't have really the population that they should
that get more representatives.
But it's even worse in the Senate.
It's way worse in the Senate.
The Senate is absolutely off kilter.
It's absolutely, like,
part of me is like, we should just abolish the fucking Senate.
The fuck do we need it for?
The Senate's the problem. The Senate's the problem
because it gives states laws and it doesn't give
the country laws. So if you're like, okay're like okay cool well what the fuck are we doing here
i also want to talk to uh uh and i i did we i don't know if we touched on it but we definitely
want to touch on it now um someone had said hey you know talking about uh uh uber people and uh
people who work for those places um we don't We also didn't want to put across the idea
that Tom or I were attacking people
who work for companies that are gig companies.
I think you find work where you can find work, period.
I would never shame your labor.
Do what you can.
I'm just saying that a lot of those companies
don't care for you. And that's what I'm saying. I don't, I don't want to, I don't want to shame you as
somebody who that's not, that's not my goal. I, I want you to, you know, anybody who has a job
out there, you get your job, however you can. I get it. And especially in a gig economy, sometimes
you got to take a gig job and I get it, but I'm not, and I would never, I would never think that
you're doing a wrong thing by working for those companies, but those companies are not doing right by you. Yep. Yeah, absolutely. Like
the point of the conversation was only to point out that, um, you should not have to struggle
so hard to make a fucking living. And like all work is like meaningful work should be valued
meaningfully. Got a message from Dean and Dean is a patron.
And he said,
Hey,
I was a sub for over two years,
but somehow patron Patreon unsubbed me.
So this is a,
your reminder folks,
if you're a patron or if you think you're a patron,
maybe go check out Patreon and double check your patronage and see if they
may be unsubbed you.
He said he thinks it's a bug.
Maybe it just happened to him.
But if,
if you are a patron and you might not be getting our content anymore,
or if something happened, go, maybe go double check. And if you are a patron and you might not be getting our content anymore or if something happened,
maybe go double check.
And if you aren't a patron,
this is a perfect time to become a patron.
So you can just go there
and you can make sure that you sign up correctly.
It'd be perfect.
So that is going to wrap it up for this week.
We do want to tell you that next Wednesday,
the night of the debates,
this is the Pence-Harris debate.
Tom and I will be watching the debate
and then after,
we won't be watching the debate live,
but just as soon as the debate ends,
Tom and I will be doing a live stream
on all of our streaming platforms.
You can come check us out Wednesday night
and we're not going to be doing
a Thursday live stream next week,
but we will be doing a post, a post debate,
a lecturing,
a kind of a recap stream.
So check it out.
Come see us on Wednesday night.
It should be around 10 PM.
Just as soon as the debates end,
turn your TV off,
come check us out and come hang out.
And if you miss the debates,
Tom and I will probably have some notes and we'll tell you what happened.
So you don't actually technically have to watch it.
We'll save that for you.
Yeah.
But I will say you probably want to watch this next one of the debates of the ones you want to watch this
one. Isn't that funny? Cause normally the vice presidential debate would be something I'd skip.
It me too. Me too. But I'll tell you the, and I, you know, I hated the Kane one, the, the,
the Tim Kane one. He was terrible. Oh, so bad. So yeah, genuinely.
But I feel like of all the people out there, Kamala Harris, she's pretty fucking money.
So we're going to check it out next week.
Come hang out with us Wednesday night, 10 p.m. Central.
That's going to wrap it up for this week.
We are going to leave you like we always do with the Skeptic's Creed.
Credulity is not a virtue.
It's fortune cookie cutter mommy issue hypno
babylon bullshit couched in scientician double bubble toil and trouble pseudo quasi alternative
acupunctuating pressurized stereogram pyramidal free energy healing water downward spiral brain
dead pan sales pitch late Info Docutainment
Leo Pisces Cancer Cures
Detox Reflex Foot Massage
Death in Towers Tarot Cards
Psychic Healing Crystal Balls
Bigfoot Yeti Aliens
Churches Mosques and Synagogues
Temples Dragons Giant Worms
Atlantis Dolphins Truthers
Birthers Witches Wizards
Vaccine Nuts Shaman healers, evangelists,
conspiracy, double speak, stigmata, nonsense.
Expose your sides.
Thrust your hands.
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