Cognitive Dissonance - Episode 581: Gambling Habit
Episode Date: June 14, 2021Show Notes...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Today's show is brought to you by AdamandEve.com and BetterHelp.com.
That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P.com.
Use code COGDIS for 10% off your first month.
Go to AdamandEve.com right now and you'll get 50% off just about any item.
All you have to do is enter the code word GLORY, G-L-O-R-Y, at checkout.
Be advised that this show is not for children, the faint of heart, or the easily offended.
The explicit tag is there button a bit.
No, I don't have to do that, Cecil,
because we're in the same fucking room.
So we don't have to sync shit up.
Syncing it up, baby.
We don't clap.
We don't do that clapping shit.
Yeah, we don't have to count and clap
or fucking do the fucking hokey pokey. you don't have to like count back to me you're like clever
hans over there with your fucking hoof no instead we can just record live from gloryhole studios in
chicago and beyond this is cognitive dissonance every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way And beyond. This is Cognitive Dissonance.
Every episode we blast anyone who gets in our way.
We bring critical thinking, skepticism, and irreverence to any topic that makes the news, makes it big, or makes us mad.
It's skeptical.
It's political.
And there is no welcome mat.
This is episode...
Oh, look at that.
Sorry.
581 of C dissonance.
And we're back in the studio again.
This is a fucking streak now, baby.
Back again, baby.
Don't call it a comeback.
We've been here twice in a row.
So, Tom, we should talk this week for sure.
Yeah.
About the biggest story out there.
And this has been going crazy all week.
And it's the secret IRS files,
the trove of never before seen records reveal
how the wealthiest avoid income tax.
And this is from ProPublica.
We recently dropped our Washington Post subscription.
Like three weeks ago.
I want to say it was three or four weeks ago.
We decided to take that money
and give it to ProPublica
because there was
two or three things
that came out
like right in a row.
They do terrific
investigative journalism.
It's so good.
And then,
oh,
you know what it was?
It was that thing
that we watched
on the insurrection.
Yeah.
That was awesome.
It was on PBS
supported by ProPublica.
And so you and I talked about it
right afterwards
and we're like,
no, we should definitely
throw some money towards it
because they don't have a pay site.
Like you literally can't pay,
you just get to donate.
That's it.
That's what they have.
So we've donated some money
and they send us emails
and this came out earlier this week
and it's not like we're special or anything.
Everybody got to read it.
No, donors get to, no, it's not like we're special or anything. Everybody got to read it. No, donors get to know.
No, it doesn't really happen.
No paywall.
No public is great.
No paywall.
We get a reminder if there's something interesting in there.
And just so happened, we got a reminder for this.
And we both read it.
It's a really, it's not anything you didn't know ahead of time.
Right.
Right.
But it's a level of confirmation and description that does just
kind of, like, here's the deal. We all have, like, to your point, it's nothing we didn't know, but
like, when they look at the most wealthy figures in America and they really break down how they
don't pay their taxes, you realize, I guess, or it's reinforced just how much the system itself is designed specifically by those people and people like them so that they never did have to pay taxes, right?
You and I are W-2 guys.
Yeah.
Like we're, like we have like a, this is our small business, but like our real income for our lives are W-2 guys.
Yeah.
We wake up, we like punch a clock of some kind or get a salary or whatever.
Yeah. And then like you get paid for the work that you do of some kind or get a salary or whatever.
And then like you get paid for the work that you do. And then you get taxed and your employer takes the tax out.
And that's most of America.
You know, it's interesting is the small business that we own makes me pay way more taxes.
I know.
I thought, thank you.
I thought like having a small business, you'd be like, I'm going to have like a tax shelter.
We talked to like a bunch of people
and they're like,
your business is so small.
Yeah.
You're not going to-
Get the fuck out of here.
Enjoy taxes, stupid.
We pay so much in taxes.
A lot of the money
that cognitive dissonance makes each year,
a good amount of that money goes to taxes
because we have to pay taxes
for the money that we earn.
Right.
And that money comes in
and we essentially have to pay,
you know, just as much as anybody else would pay that,
you know, that 25, 33% of it or whatever
just goes right off the top.
We just have to pay that.
And that's just how it works.
And the system is set up specifically,
I was thinking about this,
like what is the differentiator, right?
And my thought was that sweat from your brow,
so to speak, is taxed.
Yes, yes.
Sweat or, but money that is not earned from the sweat of your brow, so to speak, is taxed. Yes, yes. Sweat, but money that is not earned from the sweat of your brow,
but money that is earned from the existence and performance of your money
is not as much taxed, right?
Yeah.
There are a million tax shelters, tax deferral systems,
other tax advantage and offsets and losses.
When your money does the work of earning you money,
you don't pay taxes. But when the sweat of your fucking brow or the sweat of your intellect or
the sweaty, when your physical performance in a job is what earns you money, that's when you pay
the highest tax rate. Right. And as a performance, many of these people will hilariously not take an income, right? So these ultra rich
people take, for instance, Steve Jobs, who worked for a dollar at Apple. He came back to Apple and
said, I just want a dollar as my income from that. And other people have taken much. I mean,
the president did the same thing. I'm not, I don't need, I don't need the money. But they're
not making their money off of that thing that they were going to make money off of. They would have to pay more taxes if that's the case.
Right.
They literally pay no taxes because what they do is they leverage their immense fortunes for
nearly zero interest money that they can essentially use as they see fit. And when
they need to pay that money off, they cash out stock options and other stuff and dividends.
And that stuff is not nearly taxed
as much as when you go out
and you work a regular 40-hour-a-week job.
Fuck a regular job.
And even when you do have
massive capital gains earnings,
in many instances,
you can do what's called a like-kind exchange,
which is a kind of tax deferral.
So you can cash out money from one investment
and roll it into a like-kind investment.
And the gain on that prior investment
is the taxes on that are then deferred.
Yeah.
And then you can also have other losses
which can offset your income.
And you can have these like crazy,
like catch-all like other expenses,
you know, and like categories and categories.
So the whole system is created by wealthy people to avoid the kinds of taxation wealthy people
use to make their money. Right. The system, the system you and I have, which is I went to work
and they paid me for it. That's real fucking easy. Yeah. They're like, I do my taxes. It's
like, I'm not even a homeowner like i've got like what
are your tax breaks like no yeah homeowner's not a tax break anymore i thought you got to deduct
your interest in your property taxes now your property taxes they took that out a couple oh
i guess they did it's been a while since i've been a homeowner yeah they took that out a couple years
ago the property taxes went away that's fucking bonkers you pay taxes on the town the tax money
if you pay a lot of money on property tax you're essentially essentially fucked. You're just like, no, that's money.
I'm just throwing it away.
That's just out the window, yeah.
I think your mortgage insurance you do pay
or the mortgage interest,
you can get deducted.
One of those, it's either property tax or the other.
I forget, one of them's there, one of them's not.
Yeah, right.
And so, you know, but they take away
those loopholes that we have,
you know, the regular guys have.
They take away those loopholes all the time.
But the ones that are sort of in the system, embedded in guys have, they take away those loopholes all the time. But the ones
that are, that are sort of in the system, embedded in the system, those never go away. And the money,
like you say, the way money makes money, money makes money. And then they never get to, get to
tax that. And then you're looking at these people who have the immense fortune. And it's not just,
it's not just, and I know that there's going to be somebody who's going to send us a message and
be like, yeah, well, the money's not liquid and you shouldn't be able to tax all that stuff.
And, but when you're talking about real wealth, when you're talking about how much money these
people really have, the real wealth that they have, the amount of money that they can leverage
and stuff, they should be paying more than nothing, right? It's got to be more than nothing
because, you know, Jeff Bezos, a couple of, like in 2011, got a $4,000 tax credit for his kid.
Yep.
How the fuck does that even work?
He made $18 billion that year.
Yeah, it's not like...
It's a redefinition of profit and income
that specifically is designed
to favor wealthy people's earning style,
right?
Or,
or earning methodology.
It's not like Jeff Bezos didn't make that money and was wondering how,
you know,
made so little money that he got the $4,000 child tax credit and was like,
Oh geez,
I don't know how I'm going to buy groceries.
That guy's not worried about buying his groceries or making his mortgage
payment.
So where's that?
If it's not liquid,
fine.
But also it's not entirely not liquid
because he's fucking using it.
It's not like he doesn't have money
to go to fucking Starbucks
and get his fucking Frappuccino
or whatever.
That motherfucker's got
expendable income.
He's not like,
sorry, honey,
we can't afford to put gas
in the car this week.
God damn it,
the air conditioner broke.
Right.
It's not like regular people.
There's no way he's ordering off Amazon Prime a new air conditioner. Right. It's not like you, it's not like regular people. There's no way he's ordering off Amazon Prime
a new air conditioner.
Right.
There's no way that's happening.
And the thing is,
is you're right.
Like they're living
and they're living lavish lifestyles,
but there's always these,
I don't know,
billionaire fanboys,
billionaire apologists,
whoever these people are
that constantly over and over and over again
want to tell you how wrong you
are because you you point out that they're not paying their fair share and they are not paying
their fair share the same year that bezos didn't pay any money is the same years that amazon didn't
pay any money yeah and i know that people are gonna be like well amazon employs a bunch of
people yeah man but fucking there there should be something in the governmental kitty
because of that. Like we should be, the government should be fucking taking some, I mean, something,
right? It's not even a token amount. Yeah. Well, part of the problem is that we bend over backwards
to convince these large corporations to put up their headquarters and their distribution centers,
et cetera, facilities in like one location versus
another. Please stay in the United States. Please come to my state. I'll give you fucking a million.
They're not doing that for you. Listen, guy, if you want to fucking relocate to wherever the fuck
America, it's not like everybody's like vying for your fucking hand in marriage. You don't have
fucking state suitors who are like, oh, if you move here, we'll cut your taxes. You fucking move
wherever you pay, whatever taxes are there. That's it. But like, if you're a giant corporation,
although I did hear that West Virginia is offering like a $10,000 tax credit to anybody who works
from home that wants to move there. Really? Because they're going to get your income.
Yeah. And they're going to, they're essentially wooing people who work from home to say,
come fucking move to West Virginia.
That is interesting
because I know that a lot
of the Southeastern states
have done really well.
Like North Carolina
has seen an enormous influx
over the last several years.
And a lot of other states
have seen like Sunbelt states
have done really well
in terms of population increase
from exactly that reason.
But like West Virginia
is not on anybody's radar to go to.
No, yeah, no.
Not on any, no one's, have you ever heard these words? I can't wait to But like West Virginia is not on anybody's radar to go to. Yeah, no. Not on any,
no one's,
have you ever heard these words?
I can't wait to move
to West Virginia.
No one's ever said that
unless you're like
a toothless coal miner.
Only from a,
from a dude
who was dating his first cousin.
That's the only.
Actually,
have you ever met anybody
from West Virginia?
I don't think I have.
Have you ever met anybody
who's been to West Virginia?
No, but I did.
I've never even driven
through West Virginia. I did watch a documentary on I have. Have you ever met anybody who's been to West Virginia? No, but I did. I've never even driven through West Virginia.
I did watch a documentary
on the whites.
Have you seen that?
The wonderful whites?
No, is it good?
I want to see it.
It's weird.
It's super weird, man.
I want to see that.
It's about like weird people.
Yeah, it's on our list.
It's just a weird, strange,
it's just one of those
oddity documentaries
where you watch it
and you just think,
why did I watch that?
But I kind of was amused
the whole time.
Yeah, so I love that shit.
But it's all just
trivial people's lives. It's like, here's a picture
of like Americana, a slice
of Americana. I'm like, sign me
up. I like to look at people.
But I will say, reading
this article, there has been
many people for many
years that have talked about
the billionaire class, essentially and and you know
like like these people make an so much fucking money they're talking about like at one point
for a five-year period 400 billion dollars came into you know 25 people 400 billion dollars now
understand that that's like half a stimulus that we send out right you know what i mean that's like half a stimulus that we send out. Right.
You know what I mean?
That's like half the stimulus. To 25 fucking people.
Yeah.
To 25 people.
And those, in that same time period,
that's from a period of 2014 to 2018,
their incomes rose.
It's just something,
those 25 people saw their net worth rise $401 billion
in a four-year period.
During that same four-year period,
they paid $13.6 billion in federal taxes.
That's a 3.4% interest or tax rate.
Yeah.
What's your tax rate?
What's everybody's tax rate?
It's 25, 30% taxes.
That's what you're paying.
Yeah.
I'm not asking these guys to pay more than I pay.
Yeah.
But it's fucking preposterous that people who are worth hundreds of millions or billions.
I mean, the number of billion is an insane number.
A billion is an insane number of dollars to have.
That would be an insane number of pennies to have.
Yeah.
That would be a bonkers number of pennies.
Right.
To have.
Yeah. pennies to have. But to have a billion dollars, much less tens or hundreds of billions of dollars
for one walking around person
who's no fucking more important
than any other fucking two-legged walk arounder.
Yeah.
Like it's fucking bonkers.
Yeah.
And then they don't pay anything back.
Like you said, they don't pay anything into the kitty.
They're not contributing to society the same way.
Yeah.
When they drive down the fucking road,
when Elon Musk hops in his fucking electric car
and drives down the road,
he didn't pay for that road the same way you did.
Not the same way, not the same percentage money.
And I know that there's going to be people who say,
well, yeah, these people are job creators.
They're people who pay lots of money.
But understand this,
Jeff Bezos has a lot of goddamn money
and a lot of goddamn money,
just an immense amount of money.
And you're still hearing about
bad conditions and bad pay
at Amazon factories, right?
Yeah.
So it's not like they're a job creator
and everybody's happy
and it's fucking, you know,
same thing with Elon Musk.
Like you were hearing bad shit coming out of the Tesla factories. These people aren't,
it's not like they're magnanimous billionaires who happen to be giving as much of their money
back to the people as they are keeping it, right? These are shitty people.
And just as importantly, I firmly and completely reject the idea that it would provide a disincentive for
people if they could only be worth $900 million instead of 1.3 billion, right? If somebody,
like, it's not like those people, it's not like Elon Musk wouldn't have fucking
invented the electric car. Please don't send me an email that he invented the electric car. You
know what I'm talking about, people. It's not like he wouldn't have done those things if he
could only make himself a $900 million there, heir. It's fucking nonsense to pretend that if we don't overpay and overcompensate and create a system that's so grossly in favor of a tiny, tiny, infinitesimally small fraction of people that suddenly there would be no incentive for anybody to work.
Because I'll tell you what, everybody else wakes up and goes to work.
And everybody tries to do a good job. And everybody tries to earn that next dollar. incentive for anybody to work. Yeah. Because I'll tell you what, everybody else wakes up and goes to work. Yeah.
And everybody tries to do a good job
and everybody tries
to earn that next dollar.
Everybody's trying
to do that shit.
These guys would still,
fucking Jeff Bezos
would still have fucking
made Amazon
if he was only going to make
900 million
instead of 43 billion
or whatever the fucking guys were.
108 billion.
100.
Like,
let's say you taxed him
at a 30% rate
and he was only worth
$70 billion. Yeah. It's not like you'd be like, well, it's not even taxed him at a 30% rate and he was only worth $70 billion.
Yeah.
It's not like you'd be like,
well, it's not even worth doing now.
I quit, guys.
I'm not even going to make Amazon.
I'm canceling all of Amazon, period.
So, like, I don't believe that, like,
we get more innovation
because we're willing to pay
hundreds of billions of dollars
to a single fucking person.
It's absolute bullshit.
And you're right.
There's a reason.
There's already those monetary incentives.
If the monetary incentive is there for me to get up and go to work
and do fucking video and audio editing for work,
then the monetary incentive is the same thing as it is.
It's way more for Jeff Bezos or whoever the fuck, you know,
is making way more money than me.
I mean, get the fuck out of here.
It's one thing to provide for your family.
It's another thing to provide even a small legacy. But once you have such an immense
amount of money that you are accumulating wealth for the value of its accumulation,
that is problematic. That's ethically problematic from the jump. So why do you fucking wake up and
go to work every morning when you're already worth billions and billions of dollars? It's
because you're motivated by power.
Yeah.
You're trying to consolidate as much power via wealth into your own personal hands as
possible.
We should be leery of those guys.
Those guys aren't to be.
What in history are you like?
You know, it's really turned out great.
That guy consolidated an enormous amount of wealth and power into his own personal hands.
That's never, who's ever turned that like not to their evil advantage?
These guys are all one fucking fraction of a step away from a volcano layer.
Yeah, every single one of these guys has a monocle collection.
You know it.
There are individual human beings right now with more money than the GDP of many countries.
Many countries, many countries.
That's fucking bonkers.
Not even like the GDP of many countries.
Our people are like, I am worth more than that country.
An entire nation of people working and striving.
There's one fucking guy who's like,
yeah, I'm fucking worth more than that.
I could liquidate my shit and be worth more than Botswana
or whatever.
Yeah, it's insane.
Someone's going to send us
the fucking GDP of Botswana.
Now, nobody earns on Botswana.
I do want to mention this though too.
It says ProPublica's data shows
that while some wealthy Americans
such as hedge fund managers
would pay more taxes
under the current Biden administration proposals,
the vast majority of the top 25
would see little change.
And that I think is pretty disappointing is pretty disappointing. I know that there
was, I remember when Warren was
going, and Warren had a lot of plans
to tax the ultra
wealthy. And
she didn't make it very far.
But I wish that some of those plans
would get into other people's hands,
other people who are in power's hands.
Because I think, you know,
taxing the ultra wealthy is a great way
to reinvest in our society.
They have a lot of fucking money.
Yeah.
You could slightly disadvantage,
you could make unbelievably rich people
still be unbelievably rich.
And then everybody gets something out of it, right?
Or like everybody else can keep kicking
some of their fucking middle-class income up. Yeah, because that's what's really happening. That's what's really it, right? Or like everybody else can keep kicking some of their fucking middle-class income up.
Yeah, because that's
what's really happening.
That's what's really happening, right?
It's like Jeff Bezos
could not really notice
that he lost some money
and everybody in America
would have a lot more
prime money to spend.
Right, well like,
and I'm not suggesting
we do this,
but like imagine if,
how sorry would you feel
for Jeff Bezos as a human being if instead of being worth $108 billion, he was only worth $1 billion?
Think about that.
He's still worth $1,000 million.
Yeah.
If you took away, and I'm not saying we should, but even if you took away $107 billion from one guy. He's still a billionaire.
He's still wealthier than you
and everyone you've ever met ever.
Yeah.
And I think the way,
the plan that Warren was suggesting
was it would have only been,
considering his wealth,
it would be like $3 billion out of 108 or something.
Like it's nothing.
It's inconsequential.
And with that money,
we have no more student loan debt.
You know, like that's the kind of change
I'm talking about.
With that money,
people don't have to pay
to go to state schools anymore for college.
With that money,
you could have universal pre-K.
With that money,
like we're talking about an immense change
on people's everyday lives
and their entire income for years to come.
I'm still paying off student loans.
I will be paying off student loans for years to come.
I don't even care if I'm above the bracket where they go when they pay those students.
I don't even care.
I want to see student loan debt relieved.
And even if I don't make the cut, I'm still happy to see it relieved.
Right. Same thing. I mean,
if you're saying he was only going to
pay $3 billion,
you put 3% of your
income away in a 401k
or something, you don't even notice the difference.
He wouldn't notice.
He already doesn't notice.
The thing is,
his $108 billion,
if it's earning a very modest rate of return,
and this is being overly simplistic
on how massive wealth works,
but if he's earning a four and a half
or 5% return on $108 billion a year,
he's making just passively
four and a half billion plus dollars
every year just waking up
and letting his money sit around being his.
So like you take $3 billion from him.
What happens?
He blinks twice and he gets it back.
Plus another halfsies.
Yeah.
Who cares?
Yeah.
Why aren't we doing this?
Why are we allowing this kind of concentration of power?
Yeah.
And it is power.
Yeah.
Like money is just a stand-in for power.
That's all that it is.
It's the ability to act in the world.
It is a stand in for power that we all agree upon.
So like we are not just moving money to a small handful of people.
We are consolidating all types of power in our society because all money is is an agreed upon stand in for power.
Yep.
Unless we do something immediately, we will lose Glen Canyon
in three days.
Great merciful Christ.
In a week,
the rest of Arizona,
then the entire Southwest.
In two months,
the United States
officially belongs to them
and we are extinct.
You've got to be shitting me.
This story comes from
The Independent.
I don't believe in evolution.
I believe in God.
Marjorie Taylor Greene argues COVID escaped from Wuhan lab.
Now, I do want to preface this, that there have been some legitimate reporting that's
coming out that is beginning to question whether or not there may be some veracity to a Wuhan
lab.
So I want to put that out there.
Because initially, everybody blew that off because the experts said,
no, that's not the case, right?
Doesn't seem like it, yeah.
As we discover that we're not really sure where COVID has come from,
and there is some good reporting out there that says,
this isn't entirely the most far-fetched thing out there.
So I want to acknowledge that real quick.
That's not at all what's problematic about what she says, though.
Yeah.
It's not even at all.
But also,
I do want to say, like,
you also can't say
it did come from a Wuhan.
We don't know
where COVID came from.
That's the problem.
You can't say it did.
You can't say for sure now
that it didn't.
But I feel like
the honest answer is
you don't know.
Right.
And that's okay
to say I don't know. But there is a stigma about saying I don't know. Right. And that's okay to say I don't know, but there is a
stigma about saying I
don't know. There's this stigma, and
it crosses all different
types of spheres where there just
cannot be a
I'm not sure. Yeah.
Like, for real,
I'm not sure or I don't know
is the beginning of scientific
inquiry. That is where it starts.
But for many people, there can't be that shade.
So what they have to do is 100% have a definitive answer for everything.
Yeah, and it's also, for some reason,
it's deeply problematic for people to acknowledge a shift in thinking, right?
So let me put my hand out there.
Like, at the beginning of this thing,
all the experts were like,
no, this thing almost certainly started from a wet market.
It did not come from a laboratory.
Again, we don't know where it came from,
but there is some reporting now that says
that's not entirely implausible.
So now I'm willing to say, well, okay,
based on new information,
I'm willing to potentially change my mind, right?
That's how people should operate.
That's intellectual honesty. That's just integrity, right? That's just like saying,
look, I'm not going to believe the most outlandish thing first. That's a bad idea.
I am going to listen to the experts when they're available. When the experts change their mind
based on new information, I'm going to raise my hand and acknowledge I'm not an expert because
I have the internet. Yeah. Like just because I have a fucking Verizon plan doesn't make me a fucking diploma holder for all subjects.
Google University.
Right?
Can you get a PhD from Google University?
Fuck, dude.
You got one now.
I'll tell you what.
Google hands out fucking honorary university degrees to everybody.
Hello, I'm Dr. Google.
I went to Upstairs Googling College. Okay. I went to upstairs Googling college.
Okay.
Saving away.
Oh, I got a PhD in the doodles.
Ridiculous.
Yeah, but her comment is,
she says, I don't buy it
because I don't believe in evolution.
I don't believe in that type of so-called science. I don't believe in evolution. I don't believe in that type of so-called science.
I don't believe in evolution.
I believe in God.
But I don't know, like, is God working in a lab?
Working in a lab late one night?
Wait, like, her statement isn't even internally consistent, right?
It doesn't make any sense.
It makes no sense.
And the other thing is like,
she is specifically referring also
to not believing in what they call
gain-of-function research,
which is the idea that like,
you take an existing virus
and you make some changes to it.
And then based on those changes,
the virus is able to perform other functions.
And that's generally how vaccines
have worked for a very long time.
And she's like, I don't believe in that because I don't believe in evolution. First of all,
that's not evolution. That's a specific manipulation by people of the genetic structure
of an existing fucking virus. That's not evolution. You don't even know what evolution is.
How can you not believe in it? You't describe it write down three sentences you know
about evolution marjorie taylor green three sentences i'll tell you what the first sentence
can be my name is marjorie taylor green and the next two sentences will be about evolution so i'll
give you the first one the first one's a gimme the first one's the first one's signing your name
correctly i hope she talks about short neck and long neck giraffes and like turtles
without shells and whatever else we saw
at that fucking dumbass museum.
At the fucking goofball museum.
Where's that picture? Is that picture up? It is.
It's over on the wall. Oh, God. That was
a great trip. That was a good trip.
For anyone that's new,
we got to relay real quick. Cecil and I,
now four, five, six years back,
we went to the Park Ark Museum down in Kentucky. Cecil and I, now four, five, six years back, we went to the Ark Park,
Ark Museum down in Kentucky. Not in Louisville, but like outside Louisville, pretty far outside
Louisville in the middle of nothing. Yeah. It's in the middle of nowhere. The middle of nothing
where land is a penny an acre. It's just nowhere. And we go there guys. And Cecil and I have been
friends now for longer years than I'm willing to say on the air
because it ages me but more than 20 years so cecil knows me pretty fucking well and he would get out
of the car he looks at me he looks at me the way that your dad looks at you and you're like gonna
beg for shit from the gift shop right yeah and he's like you need to be polite there are people
in here that believe this stuff you need to not not laugh. Because I'm just like, okay, okay.
And so like, I'm getting my fucking game face on, right?
But we're also at the same time walking toward an enormous fake boat
in the middle of Kentucky.
And it's the funniest looking boat you've ever seen.
It is the funniest looking boat.
I'm doing that thing where I'm trying not to laugh,
but my cheeks hurt from the pressure
of both expanding and contracting at the same time.
I'm dying inside, but I'm holding it together, guys.
That's the part I want you to understand.
I am everything I have.
It's fucking enormous self-control.
In this moment, if I was a heroin addict, I'd have kicked it like that.
I am exerting control like nobody's ever seen, right?
And we walk into this place and like tears are like tears are starting to form tom is just tom
is uncontrollably shaking at this point but not a sound he's like he's he just can't he's like
shaking he's like he's like beavis you remember when beavis used to just shake or butthead i
don't know which one it was but he just shakes he just shake cornholio yeah yeah yeah we walk past
guys we walk past these, like,
like, bird cages without birds in them
that just have sounds,
like, speakers of screechy birds.
And everything is more ridiculous
than the next thing.
Again, I am fucking holding that shit together.
Oh, yeah. You're crushing it.
Because I am not going to get in trouble.
You're crushing it.
We turn this corner,
and Cecil.
Yeah.
We see this shell-lessil. Yeah. We see this
shell-less turtle.
It looks like a poo monster.
It totally looks like
somebody took a shit
and then formed a head
out of the dookie.
Yeah.
And I,
Cecil now has lost it.
Yeah, I can't.
Cecil has lost it.
What hope do I have?
We're literally holding
each other up laughing
and crying
because it's the,
it's the most absurd thing
you've ever seen in your entire life.
Because it's not an animal, right?
It's like you made it up.
It's a lump.
Yeah, and it's a lump animal.
It was the funniest shit ever.
And that place got more ridiculous
as we walked through it.
It is the funniest place.
And my favorite picture from that place
is us taking a picture underneath
and it said something like,
and everybody died or something
underneath it is seriously like under an arch it says and everybody died yeah it's one of the it's
one of the best places ever but you know one of what with this marjorie taylor green we're talking
about you know we should talk about how she doesn't believe in evolution evolution science
is one of those things that it really doesn't matter if you believe in it. It's not a hubristic God that needs your belief
in order for it to be true.
And you don't have to believe in science for it to work.
It still works on you.
You don't have to believe vaccines are going to work
for them to work around you, right?
You could be an anti-vaxxer and still benefit from vaccines
because other people around you have gotten them.
Well, and these fuckers are always so selective about the science they don't believe in right
because they absolutely believe in physics and engineering right they get on a fucking airplane
airplane they're like they don't know fuck all about bernoulli's principle oh no fucking high
pressure low pressure and like fucking foil shapes of wings they don't know any of that shit yeah
they but they sure as fuck get in that airplane and they assume it's going to fucking take off.
And not because they fucking clasped their hands together
and hoped real hard at the sky they're about
to jet themselves into.
Every single building they go into,
that's over 10 stories with an elevator.
Like, they believe in engineering. They believe
in structural engineering.
They believe in biology when they get sick.
These fuckers always go to the hospital.
Who the fuck went to the hospital?
Rick Wiles, right?
Rick Wiles.
Rick Wiles.
He didn't get sick and stay home and hope at the sky until it went away.
He went and got oxygen.
And he took medicines and doctors who went to college and fucking learned stuff about
sciencing.
They all took care of him.
They're all liars.
Yeah.
She believes in all that shit.
Yeah.
She just doesn't believe in shit when it's not going to get her reelected.
That's what this is about. It's about her
personal brand. Because there's a bunch
of dumbass fucking hillbilly bullshit
artists who want to be like,
go, go, go, go, go!
Pick them up truck! And they're going to vote for her.
100% she is doing it
for the truck nuts.
She's doing this so she can
roll smoke or whatever those
fucking idiots do.
Roll coal, Tom.
Oh, God.
I fucking saw
one of those trucks
yesterday
while I was driving around.
Up here?
Yeah.
I saw like a pickup truck
that had intentionally
put its exhaust
like up by the bed
of the truck.
Yeah, like a semi
or whatever.
Right.
It was just belching
its exhaust.
It was a beautiful summer day with like nary a cloud in the sky.
Stupid, man.
And like this guy's driving.
I'm like, how do you want a world full of you?
Yeah.
Like, yes, when you fucking shit smoke into the air and stuff, it dissipates quickly because the volume of the earth.
But like, can you not imagine the notion of scale?
Yeah.
It's a beautiful day we all get to
fucking enjoy it because there's very few of you versus people like me driving a fucking hybrid
around right yeah like i don't understand i genuinely don't understand because these guys
a lot of times too like these guys are like people that love the outdoors like i'm generalizing yeah
but a lot of these guys are guys that like, they fucking love the outdoors.
They're fishermen.
Yeah.
They're outdoors,
these guys.
And they love the outdoors. They love going out into nature.
Yeah.
And I'm like,
yeah,
all the things you like
are in danger
by the things you do.
Trump boats.
Yes.
Trump boats for freedom
or whatever.
Like,
why would you endanger
the thing you like the most?
It really,
it boggles the mind.
But these,
that is the most disgusting thing
is to be behind somebody
who's intentionally made their car
into a fucking soot factory.
It's so annoying.
It's not only just annoying just to be behind them,
but it's kind of infuriating to be behind them
because you just, they're like a litterer.
Like when you see somebody throw garbage on their car.
Thank you, yes.
And you think, you're disgusting.
You're an awful person.
Something's wrong with your brain
to throw something out of your car
and not just keep it next to you.
I live in downtown Chicago.
I'll be walking down the street
and someone will have like a cup.
They'll finish it
and they'll literally just throw it on the ground.
Why?
Throw it on the ground.
And you're like, you're 10 feet from a thing.
You could just throw it away.
It's like, I mean, there's a garbage can right there
that they come by and collect,
but they'll just throw it on the ground.
There's just a whole bunch of people in the world
that just have no idea.
And people like that will bitch if they go to a city
that's not a clean city, right?
People, that's the thing that makes me like,
that same person, if they were to go to a city
that wasn't like cleaned up as well as Chicago is cleaned up,
they'd be like, this city's fucking gross.
I guarantee it.
It's like the fucking outdoorsy people be like, this city's fucking gross. I guarantee it. Yeah.
It's like the fucking outdoorsy people.
Like,
streams are all gross.
It's like,
that's because you support things that put,
why can you,
do you know who you are?
How do you wake up and be you?
You just want to rub their face
in their tailpipe
like a bad dog.
I'm just floored by that shit.
When a man loves a woman and he actually wants to make love to her, something very, very
special happens.
And with deep, deep concentration and great focus, he is often able to achieve in a-
I'm sorry, I'm going to stop you.
I know where you're at.
I didn't mean babies in general.
Oh, well, that's good.
Because it was about to get a little gross.
This, Cecil, is goddamn genius.
So we're going to play this.
This is Milo Yiannopoulos.
Now, he's straight now.
He was gay, was a gay man.
He's not gay anymore. And he's straight now. He was gay, was a gay man. He's not gay anymore.
And he's on True News hanging out.
This was what I told you last week.
Remember when I told you last week
that there was True News,
they were doing this thing
where they had Milo come in.
And that's what's happening here.
It's Milo.
And so we're going to play Milo.
This is an amazing clip.
All right, before we play him, I'm sorry,
but we also have to talk about his hair.
We can't not talk about his hair.
He looks like one, either
Siegfried or Roy. I'm not sure which one.
I don't know the difference, but I would
say if he had
a chair, a whip, and a tiger,
100%
looks like Milo Yiannopoulos right now.
To me, he looks like a homeless
Muppet.
He looks like a Muppet with bed.
Like if a Muppet could have like
bed head for six consecutive days.
He looks like the one guy
in Shakespeare in Love
that stayed out all night.
Yes!
He's like a Renaissance bum.
He looks amazing. You guys got to see this. I i wish i could show you i can't show you but i'm gonna play him um this is him on true news uh milo yiannopoulos the first thing
that happened which will make you laugh but it's true is dog stopped barking at me i am one of
those people you know everyone's got that friend that dogs always go nuts around. You're familiar with this, right?
You got pets?
Yes.
Yeah, right, there's always somebody that dogs-
My dog doesn't bark at you.
I keep my dog in the-
That's so good, he barked at me.
He barked at you, but that's okay.
He barks at people.
You must have some work left to do.
But he barks at me, that is true.
But I was always one of those,
I know this sounds so stupid,
but this is just- Yes, it sounds very stupid.
Okay, so he's talking about,
so the context of this is he's saying,
I'm no longer gay
because I stopped being gay
because I prayed real hard.
Yep.
And therefore,
animals do not try to attack me
when I come near.
It's like the opposite of Snow White.
Snow White walks through the forest and all the,
I don't know if it's Snow White.
It's one of those Disney princesses where they walk into the forest,
they sing their little song and all the birds dress them.
The birds are literally like climbing up there.
There's a bird on every space of their arm
as they're singing and talking.
It's the exact opposite.
When the, like, as soon as Milo walked into a forest
and he was gay,
there's those magpies that were bob people
as they walked by.
Remember that one woman we watched on the stream?
Yeah, with the helmet and bison.
There was a woman we watched on the stream a while back.
And I don't remember when this happened, but it's a while back. There was a woman from Australia who was wearing a helmet and bison? There was a woman we watched on the stream a while back, and I don't remember when this happened,
but it's a while back.
There was a woman from Australia
who was wearing a helmet.
And I guess in Australia,
these magpies,
I think that's what they are.
They just,
if you go near their nest,
they will like fly at you
and like smack you.
They'll hit you.
Right.
And so she's got this helmet
and they're playing Flight of the Valkyries.
And she's racing
down this path
and she's screaming
as loud as she can
because this magpie
is following her
and it's bonking her
on the head
and she's like,
get away from me!
It's the funniest shit
I've ever seen.
But essentially,
that was Milo
Ian Alpil's life.
Yeah,
that's every gay person
according to Milo.
Well, no, you're right. And that wasn't just Milo's life. that's every gay person according to Milo. No, you're right.
And that wasn't just Milo's life.
Every gay person.
Every gay person.
Because you've never seen
like a gay couple
with a little dog.
Like that's never...
Wait, like I love...
I love...
I'm picturing like,
like Snow White,
like all the animals come
and then they're like,
start to dress.
They're like,
whoa, are you a fucking lesbian?
Hold on a second.
Whoa. Is this a feather boa I'm putting on you what the fuck man all the squirrels start
attacking and shit fucking leave snow white a fucking bloodied stump of a human being like
i'm sorry i didn't like dick enough paul's just got big bruises on him so ridiculous like also
like there's that whole idea and i don ridiculous. Like also like there's that whole idea
and I don't buy it,
but like there's that whole idea too
that like animals can sense if you're good.
Like he's basically saying like
animals knew I was an asshole.
I was a, I'm such a shit
that I was the guy
that when I went into your house,
the animal's like,
I don't trust him.
I don't trust him.
I don't trust him.
And then that girl's like,
your dog still barks at me.
It's like turns to me. It's like, well, you still got some work to do. You still got some grr. And then that girl's like, your dog still barks at me. He's like, turns to me and he's like,
well,
you still got some work to do.
You still got work to do,
yeah.
Fucking throwing shade,
huh?
Holy shit.
Is he basically being like,
so,
you know,
you kind of like the ladies,
huh?
You know,
I checked your search history.
I know what you're Googling.
How I think that God reveals himself to us,
right?
This is,
this is just my experience of it.
I was somebody who invariably, without exception,
always used to make dogs go crazy.
It's because I exuded sulfur when I was a kid.
When I would walk in,
it's like those people who roll coal, Tom.
It's the same thing.
It's rolling sulfur.
It's just pouring off of them.
It takes the coat off,
and it's like a fog machine.
It just settles like a paw over the floorboards
fucking dogs don't like the stench of brimstone and dick it turns out
devil shows up and he's got a trident it's just three flaccid penises
come on fellas we're partying down so we have a friend who's a political candidate
down here right
and her campaign manager
has two of these
little yappy dogs
and they would
you can tell how little
he likes dogs
you know
that's why they're barking at you
right
that's exactly it
you can tell here like
that he is
he is not a dog person
which fine
if you're not a fucking dog person
no one's making it
but I like
everybody
animal or otherwise you can tell if you don't like me right like if I walk into a fucking dog person no one's making it but i like everybody animal or
otherwise you can tell if you don't like me right like if i walk into a room and somebody doesn't
like me one i'm not surprised yeah b i don't care c like yeah i can fucking tell yeah like so can
your dog and like if you walk in a room and somebody's like weird nervous derisive unpleasant
the dog's not gonna like that of. Yeah, of course not. Dogs are just fucking animals.
We fucking evolved with them for 200,000 years together.
They've picked up how to read us.
Exactly.
There's nothing that's got, oh, yeah, the dogs like me.
They're just fucking little yappy shit dogs.
Fuck those fucking dogs.
But anyway, they don't like me.
A lot of times I'd walk in the room and just start kicking them,
and they didn't like me at all.
Stop.
I couldn't be in her house for more than 20 minutes
because it would drive everybody crazy.
Yeah, no.
It has nothing to do with the thought.
No, that's literally,
I wouldn't want to be around you for more than three seconds,
let alone 20 minutes.
Can you imagine,
what would it take for you to have Milo Yudopoulos
in your house for 20 minutes?
Like, if he paid off my house,
I would be like,
nah, I'll keep paying.
I'll make my own payments.
I literally cannot think of a moment
I would want to spend with a man.
No.
He's such a...
And why I hate him so much
isn't that he's just a shitty asshole racist.
I don't even know that he's a racist, right?
What he is is a provocateur.
Right.
And that's what he has been since the beginning.
If you're unfamiliar with Milo's work, just go look and read some articles about him. He's a racist, right? What he is is a provocateur. And that's what he has been since the beginning. If you're unfamiliar with Milo's work,
just go look and read some articles about him.
Milo has been a pro troll, like Tom says, for years.
And the thing is, is that he manipulated people
into the far right, just like,
and he's done it for years.
And I don't even know if he believes it.
And I don't think he cares.
I think what he cares about
is that it made him famous and it made him money.
And I think that's the only thing he's ever cared about.
And so, you know, when it comes down to it,
I just, I'm disgusted by him.
Yep, same thing.
I just, that whole like troll for hire sort of bullshit
like that, like that's worse than somebody who has integrity and is awful. Yeah. Like I genuinely,
I, I, I don't like, and I don't respect, but I respect more somebody who has exactly the opposite
values I have. If they have values. Yeah. Even if they're the worst values ever, but these fucking,
these scumbag bullshit artists
who are nothing more than just
trying to get a rise.
Sure.
And that rise is what creates the attention.
They'll wear anything
that that will get them money.
I fucking hate those people.
Yeah, yeah.
I cannot stand them.
They just, ugh.
I mean, you know,
I don't know the inside of Milo's mind,
but judging by the rest of his entire life,
this feels like he's just
pretending to not be gay.
Of course it does.
I mean, that's what it feels like.
I don't know the inside
of his mind.
I can't.
But it feels very like that.
But if the past
is any indicator of the future,
then he's lying about this too.
Yeah.
Well, and like this too,
I think this is the
most sensible path
to public redemption that he had after his whole,
because he got canceled
because of his fucking pro-pedophilia comments.
Yeah, right.
And so how the fuck do you get out of that?
Well, find God.
Yeah.
It's the get out of fucking responsibility free card
for any awful thing you do in America.
And a lot of religious people don't mind pedophiles.
Right, yeah, it's a good home for them.
Let's be real honest. A lot of religious people don't care. Yeah, they Right. Yeah, it's a good home for them. Let's be real honest. A lot of religious people
are like, hey, welcome in. We got a whole system for you guys.
Even growing up, we had
Alsatians, we had Black Labradors.
They just didn't like me
at all. You ever think
maybe they just wanted to try to taste the rainbow?
They bite them.
Tastes like a Skittle in there.
Oh, look at that. Tastes like a Skittle in there. Look at that.
Tastes like a urinal cake.
Hey, no matter which part I bite,
it all tastes the same.
Yeah, it all tastes the same.
Oh, weird.
I like that.
It's like, they just didn't like me.
It's like, man,
do you ever think that you're just unlikable?
Yeah.
You ever think that maybe
there was never a moment in your life
that anyone was going to like you?
Yeah.
It's probably, I'll tell you what, if from an early age, nobody and nothing has ever gravitated toward you, that's on you.
You've got some fucking self-reflection to do.
You need to sit quietly in a room for a while and think about that.
I can't even make friends with pets.
Fuck.
Fucking, I got sea monkeys and they boiled the water.
But dogs don't bark at me anymore and it happened almost overnight.
Now they seem to quite like
me and it sounds like it's the stupidest thing
in the world. It is. That's the
stupidest thing in the world. It is the stupidest thing in the world. Yes, thank you.
You're a genuinely stupid person, Milo.
Hi.
Are you or a loved one a conservative
who's never given someone an orgasm?
Did you save yourself for marriage but realize your file won't load?
Has your husband rolled off of you, told you to finish on your own,
but because you've internalized the patriarchy,
you end up writing an op-ed on how the female orgasm is actually hurting the U.S. economy?
Well, Adam and Eve may be right for you.
It's a natural and fun alternative to Joyless Republic and SEX,
and downright biblical.
What could be more original than Adam and Eve? And you don't want to get thrown out of that lady garden of Eden, so sometimes you got to listen to what the serpents say and eat the fruit
if you catch my meaning. Adam and Eve has thousands of glorified products that make you scream
hallelujah, amen, the south mouth will make me rise again. Let the Lord shine down his glory on
your purchases.
Make sure to use code GLORY at checkout.
Now, you know you're going to want to tell everybody about this code
or amount to a hill of unflipped beans.
Because when you use code GLORY, you get 50% off almost any one item.
Now, don't get confused.
That is 100% product with only 50% the price.
That's like a two-for-one deal right there in that you get one item
where you cut the price in two and don't pay the second half.
Now, you better hush your mouth.
I'm fixing to tell you a secret.
When you use that code GLORY, you will get six free Picante movies that are hotter than
a jalapeno.
You also get a free gift, a free gift, and a free gift for you, for them, for all y'all,
and a hitch on the Pony Express.
That's free shipping, Yankees.
Well, if the crick don't rise, you better spread them thighs, sit down, and go to adamandeve.com and use code GLORY. Adamandeve.com is also for Adam and Steve, even Neve, Steve,
even Reeves, Chad, Damon, and Genevieve, and Greg. And for all couples, singles, quads, polygroups,
monogamists, doms, subs, monogamisters, monogamists, courtships, relationship anarchists, spanky tankies,
and Greg apologists. Use code GLORY for mind-blowing pleasure, as recommended by 9 out of 10 doctors,
the last of which was Paul Gagswood. Have two thumbs up. Can't spell America without I Came Raw.
spill America without. I came raw. Bless. BetterHelp. We want to thank BetterHelp for being a sponsor of the show. All of us at Cogdiss believe in the power of therapy,
and we want you to start living a happier, healthier life today. You can start communicating
in under 48 hours with your own licensed professional therapist. This is all because BetterHelp will
assess your needs and match you accordingly. Connect in a safe and private online environment.
It's very easy to send a message. You'll get timely and thoughtful responses all without
ever having to sit in an uncomfortable waiting room. It's not just more comfortable, but it's
also more affordable than traditional offline counseling. And there is financial aid available.
The service is available for clients worldwide.
You can find professional counselors in specific areas of expertise,
depression, stress, anxiety, relationships, sleeping, trauma, anger, family conflicts,
LGBT matters, grief, self-esteem, and narrow expertise areas
like why Gary is taking the seat off the toilet why is that
useful uh as a listener you'll get 10 off your first month by visiting our sponsor at better
help.com slash cog dis join over 1 million people who have taken charge of their mental health
again that's better help h-e-l-p dot com slash COG this.
Sister, you tell this piece of S word that I would personally F word him up.
You tell him that his mama's a H.
Cutter, I believe ho is spelled with a W.
Right, W. And his sister's a W and his grandmama's a two bit W.
Who makes double because she got no teeth?
You tell him I said that.
All right, so the story comes in the Washington Post, and I have to read a part of this article. Despite her vow of poverty,
nuns stole more than $835,000 from a Catholic school, prosecutors say. With each new school year, fresh checks for tuition and fees streamed into the principal's office at St. James Catholic
School in Torrance, California.
But for 10 years,
those checks along... I don't understand
how they didn't catch this
like the first hour this happened.
But for 10 years,
those checks,
along with donations,
scarcely made it
to the school's bank account.
Instead, the school's principal,
Sister Mary Margaret Cooper, 79...
It's always a Mary Margaret.
It's always a Mary Margaret.
Every time. It's always a Mary Margaret. It's always a Mary Margaret.
Every time.
It's always a Mary Margaret.
Was stealing the money
and using it to bankroll her gambling habit.
She's got a gambling habit.
I love, thank you.
She's got a double.
That's the only reason I wanted this article.
She walks up and she takes it off
and she's like, bet it all on black.
You can tell it's Mary Margaret coming from a mile away
because her actual habit is like three cherries.
You walk up and shake her hand and turn into three sevens.
Oh my God.
That's amazing.
It's so funny.
She had a giant habit.
She had a giant habit of spending other people's money.
But one of the things that they said in the article,
which I thought was hilarious,
where they said something like,
this was inconsistent with her vow of poverty.
And then I thought about it.
I thought, no, if you have a gambling addiction,
it's definitely consistent with a vow of poverty.
Definitely consistent.
Because you ain't, you ain't.
I got a story actually.
Okay.
So years ago, this was, happened to my dad, right?
So my dad used to tell this story.
My dad was addicted to a lot of different things.
Cigarettes.
He was an alcoholic, you know.
And he was also a gambler.
Before we were born, before all the kids were born.
He was a gambler.
And his gambling, and this is something I had no idea,
I guess back in the day,
pinball machines were gambling machines.
Really?
Yeah, so evidently,
and I don't know if this was all pinball machines
or just a select few pinball machines,
but you would go into a place,
there's a bar by him,
and you would put a dime in.
He said it costs a dime.
So you'd put a dime in
and then you would play the pinball game.
And if you scored a certain amount
or did something in it,
you would get,
change would come out.
So you could win money that way.
And he used to go in
and he said he would spend like his
whole check. Oh, fuck. He would walk in and he would just get dimes after dimes after dimes and
he would put them in and play it. And he said he spent his whole check a couple of times. And he
said that the guy who came in and cleaned the things out came up to him a couple of times.
They became friends or whatever. And he would, you know, he'd be playing and the guy would come in and take the money.
And the guy, the story is,
is that the guy reached in and said,
here you go.
My dad's name was Lou.
So he said, here you go, Lou.
And he said like two big handfuls of dimes on the thing.
And he said, you go ahead and spend those.
He's like, cause I'm going to get them back.
He's like, they're all going to come back to me.
He said, you can't win this.
You can't beat this.
He said, Lou, look at this thing. And he opened it up and it's just all electronics. It's
all electronics. And he's like, you can't beat this electronic thing. You cannot, you, you can't
do anything to win. There's nothing you can do to win. And, uh, and I always remember that, that
story used to tell that story a lot. So he told that story many times throughout my life. I, you
know, you know how dads are. They tell the same times. I did three things and I'm going to tell you about it a
hundred times. I did three things. All my dad's stories were, I don't know if they were life
lessons, but they were definitely, you know, but- They had a moral attachment? I guess the moral is
you can't, my dad always tried to instill on me, you can't beat the house. That was the moral that
my dad always kept on saying over and over and over again. Could you imagine losing $865,000?
No.
Gambling?
See, so I am the world's worst gambler.
First of all, I don't know how to gamble.
And like, generally speaking, like I'm not like much of a games person in general, right?
So like games don't hold a tremendous appeal for the most part to me.
So like, I'm kind of like immune to that because I'm just like not interested in the game portion
of it.
Yeah.
But also I'm just a cheap motherfucker and it doesn't, remember when we went to, the
first time we went to Vegas, went to Vegas for Tam.
Yeah.
And we first were like, we're not first, we were doing the show for a few years.
Patron just came out, like we made just a, just a tiny amount of money.
And it was the first thing you and I had ever done together for the were able to go to town yeah yeah but i had like no money outside of the
money for like the show they're like we had these things planned to do but i didn't have a lot of
spending money yeah so like i went down to the floor and i walked up to um the craps table and
i had like 20 or something and i changed my 20 for chips and i walked up to the woman i'm like hey, hey, can you show me how to play? And she showed me how to play, and I put my chips,
and then she did the dice or whatever it was, and then she took her thing, and she took most of my
money, my chips, and then I'm like, oh, okay, I guess I'll do it again, and I did it again,
and it was all gone, and it was two. Two runs. The whole thing took. Two dicers. 40 seconds. Sure.
And I was like, she's like, do you want to keep playing?
And I was like, fucking no, I don't want to keep playing.
Are you kidding me?
Nothing happened and it cost me $20.
I could have gone to see a two-hour movie.
Yeah.
Nothing happened.
I gave you $20 and you gave me, I took $20.
I was floored by the whole thing.
I was like, I I gotta get out of here
this isn't for me
yeah yeah
but like
gambling is
like gambling
and these big casinos and stuff
they're just inherently unethical places
and there is a certain kind of person
who I think genuinely
through no fault of their own
they're just wired to enjoy that
like they're wired
to get that dopamine rush
that interaction
sure
and like for some reason,
we've decided that
in certain contexts,
we will steal money
from those people.
Yeah.
Like we,
we're okay with it.
We won't do it
in most places though
because we recognize
like we don't want it
in every grocery store.
So like we're,
it's kind of a weird thing.
They don't put it everywhere.
Right.
But as time goes on,
it's seeping more and more
into our culture
because there's other places
where you can play now
video slots
or video poker
in certain bars
and you can bet
on that sort of thing too.
And then now
on your phone,
you can do sports book.
There's a sports book
for your phone.
Oh, you can bet.
There's sports books
for your app.
Oh.
And then there's betting on.
You can bet real money for that.
Yeah, real money. I thought that shit was illegal. No, I think, on. You can bet real money for that. Yeah, real money.
I thought that shit was illegal.
No, I think I'm pretty sure that.
I believe you.
I'm just surprised.
I'm pretty sure that you can do it.
And I know that they advertise it all the time on sporting games.
Do you think that puts the mafia out of business?
I don't know.
Because didn't the mafia have to run books?
Because now I'm really curious.
Yeah, I have no idea.
I wonder if they're like super mad about that. Like, hey our thing yeah I mean you gotta wonder though too like what are you
gonna do hey we gotta we gotta whack that app guy I know what are you gonna do I know it's already
out there like what do you do then there's some guy like in the back of a fucking deli just like
what am I supposed to do now they stick an iPhone in a fish and they wrap it up and they cut it
they cut the head off the iPhone
and you wake up
next to the iPhone.
I mean,
what happens?
How do you intimidate
that guy,
you know?
So,
I don't know.
I really genuinely
don't know.
I don't know.
Yeah,
I know for a long time
that it was like
an underground,
if it wasn't the mafia,
it was certainly like,
like it was definitely shady.
It was one of those things
where,
you know,
if you didn't,
that's why I'm being
intentionally ridiculous. You didn't pay, there you didn't, you didn't pay,
there was a problem. You're going to have some problems. It's a nice business you got here.
We're going to get emails from people. I know people are going to get mad. I'm Italian. I can
do that. I'm allowed to, I'm allowed to hold my hands. You're when you, when you say, when you
talk like that, you have to, you have to hold your hands in a certain way. you have to hold them up near your face and you have to you have to clinch them
together like little lobster claws and you have to move your hands in and out like this like you
have to keep on doing the back and forth that's you can't it's racist if you don't do that it's
racist if you don't do and i can do it because some of my best friends are italian oh god
and that was when
tom got cancelled
from the internet
we're gonna get it now
oh god
through the years
it's possible to track
ireland's sexual health
by how it was taught
in schools
from the 1960s
putrid
rancid
repulsive
wrong and the comparatively enlightened 1970s the man The 60s. Putrid, rancid, repulsive, wrong!
And the comparatively enlightened 1970s.
The man puts where he goes to the toilet into where the girl goes to the toilet and with god's intervention a seed will grow that's that and so how the british
ireland sister it comes from the friendly atheist blog over at patheos bill donahue sees live don't
like this guy was like a staple of the show 10 years ago. Bill Donahue condemns anti-Catholic ad that helps child sex abuse victims.
So hold on a second, Tom, can we play this?
Oh yeah, we absolutely should.
I'm going to play, just going to play this ad for you guys.
It's a hundred percent a mesothelioma ad, except for they replaced it with like genuinely
with child sex abuse.
It's crazy.
It's like a fucking roundup ad.
Yeah, this is like,
this is very much
the typical sort of
ambulance chaser type,
like has this ever happened to you?
Kind of a feeling to it.
Attention.
This message is for
the survivors of abuse
by the Catholic Church.
New York, New Jersey,
and California
have extended the window to file a claim for victims of childhood sexual abuse.
It doesn't matter how long ago it happened.
If you or someone you love were a victim of sexual abuse by a priest, any employee, or other Catholic Church official, now is the time to hold these abusers accountable.
We are here to help.
I am just, it's crazy to me.
What's crazy is, you know, you call them ambulance chasers.
And the reason why there's ambulance chasers is because there's a lot of accidents.
Right, yeah.
There's a reason why this commercial exists.
It's because there were so many abuses by the Catholic Church
that there needs to be a, like, class action group of lawyers out there
that are trying to get people the, you know, just a little
bit of compensation and recompense for the horror that they had to endure at the Catholic church's
hands. Yeah. You know, as sort of maybe crass as this ad may be, it's a free market externalization of the reality that there's
a market for this.
And the only reason there's a market for this is there's plenty of fucking customers.
Yeah.
Because the Catholic Church abused so many people.
So many people.
This is the free market solution.
This is literally the free market answer and response to this.
This is a company, this firm is a company that's saying, hey, there's a market here.
I don't feel bad for the Catholic Church for creating a fucking sexual abuse survivor's market.
This is the consumers holding someone responsible for damage.
It's the same thing that happened with asbestos. It's the same thing that happened with asbestos.
It's the same thing that happened
with the mesothelioma stuff that was going on.
There is somebody out there
who's trying to make sure that the people
who have been injured are being,
they're getting something for it.
And this is the exact same thing.
We're in the same boat with the Catholic church
because they've dealt out so
much damage to a group of people. And a bunch of young people have been abused by the church.
And Bill Donahue has this to say. He says, if someone has been violated by a minister, rabbi,
imam, school teacher, coach, psychologist, psychiatrist, athletic administrator, camp
counselor, guidance counselor, Hollywood studio official, media employee, doctor, nurse, lawyer, or anyone else,
he can take a walk. They are not interested. They are only interested in going after priests.
Then he says, quote, if you're a victim of crime committed by an African-American and would like
help in filing a claim against us, contact against him, contact us now. Would any firm in the United
States run such an ad? Would any media outlet accept it?
Okay.
Don't compare yourself.
You know,
sometimes it's okay
to say,
substitute,
make it black
and see how that works.
But that only works
when it's a marginalized group,
right?
You can do the substitution
when it's a marginalized group.
When you're the marginalizer,
it makes you sound
even worse than before. Now you're not marginalizer it makes you sound even worse than before now you're not only
a pedo defender you're a racist yeah you're a racist pedo defender also like black is not an
organization right being black is just yeah that's just the fucking amount of fucking melanin in your skin, right? It is not a specific organization that has for years sought to hide the abuse,
the sexual abuse of children and other folks within its organization by moving.
Like, yeah, it's just not the same as just somebody is black.
I'm not black, but I'm highly offended.
I would be highly offended if anybody compared me to the Catholic church.
Absolutely.
I would be like,
Oh,
I didn't fucking shuffle priests around.
Fuck.
Oh,
like,
I didn't fucking like,
I didn't try to hide the fact that someone's raping kids.
Well,
and like,
he's also like,
you know,
what about all these other categories?
Well,
I don't know.
Like the thing is this,
this,
this,
this law firm,
this law firm is not out to make things right. This law firm is out to make its own money.
Yeah. Right. And the law firm looked and said, Hey, you know, who does a lot of this shit?
The Catholic church. Well, if there was an organization, just like one big organization
of rabbis that had literally thousands and thousands and thousands of cases that stretched
back multiple decades, if not, then yeah, they would see the fucking dollars there. The point is like the
Catholic church is a good place to go after because you have an enormous history of doing this. Yeah.
Like you've created, he seems offended that people are saying, well, why are you singling us out? I
don't know. Why did you do this so much? It's such a weird fucking whataboutism.
It's so weird.
It's so dishonest.
Own it, man.
Like that's the problem I have with many people that,
with everyone who defends the Catholic church about this.
Because the only thing you have is whataboutism
because there's such a long line of people
who got molested by this church,
who got ruined.
Their lives have been ruined by this church. And you're going to somehow be defensive about it. You can't get to be
defensive. You get to be repentant. That's what you get to be. You get to be, I leave. That's
what you should be doing. Yeah. The fact that other people have, like, if you're a serial killer,
a defense cannot be, well, there's been other serial killers. Look, the other, they were more worse.
Look, yeah.
Look, I got 12, but somebody else got 14.
Exactly.
So you got to admit.
Yeah.
I'm like six sevenths as bad as that.
I'm not as bad.
Come on.
I mean, I'm like, come on.
Just let me go.
Who'd you have dinner with is my question.
Get the fuck out of here.
There are some things you can do that are just so abhorrent that if you do them once,
it's never okay ever.
Yeah.
That's how some things work.
And like sexually abusing children is one of those things.
And it turns out once is not the time.
No, and it's hundreds and hundreds and hundreds.
And it's people who are repeat offenders over and over and over and not just on one continent, on multiple continents.
It is just a, it's a, it's a basically a harm inducing organization.
Right.
Over and over and over and over again.
And when they, when they cover that up,
they're complicit.
Yeah, they're like,
they're complicit in the prior activity
and they are tacitly encouraging
further activity.
Absolutely right.
So you're just like, yeah, right.
So you're like driving the getaway car?
Yeah, pretty much.
And you want, and you want us to be cool with that like i didn't i didn't rob that bank but i did drive bank robber joe to the bank and then when he ran in i drove him away to the safe house which
was my house yeah but i got nothing to do with the bank robbery yeah get the fuck out of here. Yeah.
So we'd like to thank our patrons. Of course, we'd like to thank all our patrons. We'd like to thank our newest
patrons. I'm not clever enough
for a patron name.
I disagree. Rob,
BugNerd77,
Key, DEE,
Kyle, Terrence, and people
up there pledges, Christian.
Thank you so much for your generous donations.
We really do truly appreciate it.
You guys are the reason Gloria Hall Studios
exists. So thank you guys so much
for your generous donations. And more than we
appreciate it, I just want to say too, we need
patrons. If we didn't have patrons, we couldn't do
this show. Yeah. So we
need you guys. If you're available, you've been
listening to the show for a long time, you've been thinking about becoming a patron,
I don't know, stop thinking about it,
become a patron.
Yeah, become a patron.
Just do that thing.
Got a message.
This is from Tyler,
and Tyler wanted to let us know
that we're an influence on him.
He started his own podcast,
but also he found us through Citation Needed.
That's awesome.
I think that's great.
Tyler, thank you for listening.
And hey, guys, if you're out there and you're not listening to Citation Needed. That's awesome. I think that's great. Tyler, thank you for listening. And hey guys,
if you're out there
and you're not listening
to Citation Needed,
stop doing that.
Yeah, you should listen to it.
And start listening
to Citation Needed.
Citation Needed
is a very good show.
It's a fun show.
We put a lot of work
into that show,
but also that show
is a really interesting mix
of off-the-cuff and script.
And so the scripted stuff is from the essayist
and a few jokes get written in,
but there's a lot of off-the-cuff stuff
that happens in that show that's very funny.
And there's a lot of good improv stuff
that happens while we're recording.
So some really good stuff.
And there's a lot of creative energy in that group,
the five of us, the scathing guys as well as us.
I think there's a lot of creative energy there
and it's a lot of fun to do.
It is.
It's a great show.
If you guys haven't listened to it,
please do.
Go over and check it out.
Citation Needed.
It's a wonderful podcast.
We love doing it.
I love doing that show.
It's a lot of fun.
It's a great show.
Every week.
And it's a short show too.
The other thing too is
it's not a big time commitment.
30 minutes,
35 minutes,
45 minutes.
Sometimes they can get up,
I think the longest one we had was close to an hour,
but most of them are short.
So we got this, Brian sent me a message
and there's a woman who's driving down the road in Arkansas
and she is getting pulled over
and she throws her hazards on
because she's on an interstate
and there's no real shoulder.
The shoulder is very slim.
It's very narrow shoulder. And so she very slim. It's a very narrow shoulder.
And so she decides to keep going
until she gets off this bridge area
so that she can finally maybe get to an exit or something.
She is kind of halfway in.
If you watch the video,
she's kind of halfway in the shoulder,
but she's got her flashers on and she's slow,
but she's continuing down the road.
And if you're a thinking person,
you would recognize
she's looking for a place
to pull over.
She's not like racing
from the cops here.
That's important.
Yeah.
And then the cop pits her car,
pit maneuvers,
hits the back quarter panel
of her car
and flips her over.
She happens to be pregnant
at the time.
Yep.
And the cop comes over
to her car
while she's trapped
in the car upside down.
He's like,
can you get out of the car?
She's like, yeah,
I'm pregnant.
She's clearly scared. She just got a fucking traumatic rollover accident. Yeah, the car upside down. He's like, can you get out of the car? She's like, yeah, I'm pregnant. She's clearly scared.
She just got a fucking
traumatic rollover action.
Yeah, the car flips over.
And she's like,
she's like,
I thought I could,
I thought I could
get off at the next exit
before I pulled over.
And the cop with no trace
of sympathy or empathy
for her condition
as she's upside down,
it's just like,
no, ma'am,
you got to pull over
as soon as you see
those flashers.
That is,
that is a perfect example of that contempt to cop.
And you watch somebody just use their power like a weapon.
He flipped her because he could.
Because he could.
Because he could.
And hopefully, she sues him.
Yep.
And she gets some money out of that because that's egregious.
It's awful to watch.
It's actually really scary to watch. So I guess like the the lesson is like i don't know if you're really allowed i
always thought you were too but i thought you were allowed to put your flashers on drive slow
give every indication you were trying to pull over and then wait till you could get someplace safe
she's she's not in a fucking bank getaway vehicle no even and he'll be perfectly frank even in a
bank that getaway vehicle i think it I think it's an overuse of power
you see it in these things where you're just like
if they didn't kill anybody
why are you performing a move that could kill them
like it doesn't make any sense
you have a helicopter
you have plenty of ways in which to find them
you know what car they're in
you could just follow them from a distance
there's so many other things that you could do
but instead it's just this
I gotta stop them
and I gotta stop them right now and I'm chasing them and their blood's up Follow them from a distance. There's so many other things that you could do, but instead it's just this, I got to stop him. I got to stop him.
And I got to stop him right now.
And I'm chasing him and their blood's up.
And they've got to,
I mean, even if somebody committed a crime,
I don't know that I think the pit maneuver is a good idea, right?
Because it could kill somebody.
Well, like a lot of times the pit maneuver,
like there are some cars
that has a very high incidence of rollover.
The pit maneuver, like it's not a,
like anything else, it's not a perfect,
like, you know, a textbook thing that you do it a little bit wrong. You fuck the other car up,
you flip them over. You could kill somebody, could kill other drivers on the road. That's a lot.
That's a lot of risk to take. If someone's being reckless and has hit somebody, maybe killed
somebody or something, I could, you know, you know, there are, I'm sure there's situations,
but in most situations where it's just somebody who's like,
you know, maybe trying to get away from the
cops and they didn't even do anything or whatever,
they're running because they're afraid or whatever it is,
I'm not a guy
who's like, you should... Pit them? No!
I mean, should they pull out their gun and shoot them?
Because here's the thing, man, if you're on the road
and you flip somebody over, there could be somebody who runs into
them or something like that. It's just dangerous, man.
You could kill somebody uninvolved entirely.
Yeah, it's just dangerous.
We got a message from Vice Rhino.
He says, I'm slightly disappointed in today's Citation
Needed episode. Now, this is a Citation Needed episode
we did last week on
Odd Foods. He said,
you neglected to mention the sour toe
cocktail from Dawson City in
Canada's Yukon Territory.
Essentially, it's a shot of whatever
you choose, but with a severed
human toe tossed in.
What are you talking
about?
You've got to imagine. Why do you have a whole
bunch of... I mean, clearly this is a joke,
right? It has to be because otherwise you've
got like your olives, your pearl
onions, your maraschino cherries.
It's so good on the end of a toothpick.
And these things.
It's a Bloody Mary.
It has to come from Mary,
but yeah, sure.
Yeah.
I'm going to look into this
because he says,
I thought maybe the story behind
the origin of that cocktail
will be enough for an episode on its own.
So I'll look into it.
Thank you, Vice Drido,
for sending that in.
Got another message.
This one is from some random guy
and he says,
I've been listening to citations
since the beginning
and just recently decided
to give a see what Cogdiss
was all about.
And he's glad he did
because he likes our conversational style.
He likes how we hang out together.
How cool is that?
Thank you for giving us a listen.
Some random guy.
We very much appreciate it.
A bunch of people mentioned this.
Some people mentioned it on chat.
A couple of people mentioned it on comments. A couple people mentioned it on comments.
And Cheryl sent it in to us and said,
the CCP is the Chinese Communist Party.
We did say something about CCP last week.
And we were like, what the fuck is that?
Didn't know what Rick Wiles was talking about.
I didn't know what he was talking about.
But yeah, now that you say it, yeah, it makes sense.
Got a message.
This is from Bryce Wolf.
And he said that he sent us
in a sticker last year that says,
I caucus for Tom. And we do have that sticker.
We do. We got it up somewhere.
If I can find a place to put it in the stream sometime,
maybe I'll take something down and put it up.
But he sent us, I caucus for Tom.
Yeah. Thanks, Bryce.
I didn't even know I was getting concussed.
We got a message from Seth and Seth says, hey guys, I'd wanted to mention that you can absolutely
find out what's in the vaccine and it's will for ignorance for anyone not to know the ingredients
are literally posted on the FDA website and given on a sheet when you get the vaccine. So yeah.
And he basically lists what's in the mRNA to us. He says, here's what's in the mRNA. So you
absolutely can find out.
We got another message from Jeff, and
he says, a fan of your show since I
found it through Citation Needed back in
2017. Thank you. That's amazing.
I'm glad people are sending in these messages and be like,
yeah, man, I found your show through Citation
Needed. Because again, we weren't sure that that
was going to be a way in which people would find our
show. Right. We knew they would work the other way.
Yeah. We figured it would work the other way
where people would find Citation Needed through Cogdiss.
But yeah.
I got a message from Matt on Patreon.
He says, speaking of Chicago,
Cecil's Who You Crappin' comment
brought me right back to Bors and Bernstein.
Yeah, absolutely, man.
They used to do a segment called Who You Crappin'.
And it was an awesome segment where you could,
anybody in the sports world,
it was a sports podcast. you could, anybody in the sports world, it was sports,
it was a,
not a podcast,
it was a sports radio broadcast.
And anybody who made a,
sort of a,
had an act of hypocrisy during the week that said something,
did something,
and then they did something else
or said something and did something else,
you could say who you crapping
to the person
and you would sometimes write
and make a joke about it and stuff. And you could fax them. This is back in the day where you could say who you crapping to the person and you would sometimes write and make a joke about it and stuff
and you could fax them.
This is back in the day
where you could fax them.
So this is a long time ago.
But yeah, Matthew,
that's exactly where I got that.
Who you crapping?
From Bors and Bernstein in Chicago
that were on AM 890
a decade and a half ago.
Real quick, Cecil.
I was trying to explain what a fax machine was to my nanny the other
day.
She's 20.
And her doctor needed her to fax something.
And I was trying to explain to her.
I'm like, okay, it's two machines that are attached.
They're telephones, but they're telephones with a printer built into them.
And one machine has to dial the other machine.
Then the phone rings on the other machine.
Then the machine picks up the phone and then they talk.
And then it will print what you,
but you have to take a piece of paper in one machine and put it in the other
machine.
And it will,
it will print that.
And she was looking at me.
I'm trying to explain like that.
It's a phone that dials another phone and prints out what the first machine
scanned.
She was just like,
what are you saying?
Just try to explain a fax machine to a
20-year-old. It's amazing. There was a tweet
I saw the other day. Someone had
said, one of my co-workers
asked if I was old enough to see a
PlayStation 2 in real life.
And the rest of
the tweet says, if you need me,
I'll be walking into the ocean.
I love it so much.
I laughed until I almost passed out
when I saw that tweet.
I thought it was so amazing.
I actually had another incident this week
where my wife and I
were at a doctor's appointment
and the person at the front desk was talking about how they had somebody who was also very young.
And they wanted them to burn a CD with labs.
And the woman was like, burn the CD?
Like burn it?
But it's so funny because genuinely-
What would you do with a CD?
No, but genuinely, we were watching that movie for GAM.
We were on GAM a couple of weeks ago,
and they were talking about burning DVD-ROMs.
Yes.
I mean, they were talking, which is a dead medium.
I don't even have a computer anymore.
I don't even own a computer anymore that has a DVD drive.
No, I don't.
Can you buy one anymore that has a drive in it?
Yeah, you can buy an external one now.
Do they have it built in the machine?
I mean, you can.
You probably could, but if you wanted to do one, I had to buy an external one now. Do they have it built in the machine? I mean, you can. You probably could.
But if you wanted to do one,
I had to buy an external DVD drive
because there was a couple things
that I had to get from old stuff.
Right, yeah.
But I had to buy a DVD drive that's USB powered
because you just don't have that.
Like, we have DVDs at home.
Haley has a bunch of old DVDs.
Some stuff you just can't stream.
Sure.
Like Northern Exposure, you can't stream. Sure. Like Northern Exposure
is you can't stream it anywhere.
Right.
So we have that stuff on DVD
and because of that,
we have a DVD player.
Yeah, right, right.
But like,
I think we turn that on once a year.
Yeah.
So I have a DVD player too
and I never watch anything on DVD,
but I have like game consoles
that play Blu-rays.
That does the same thing.
And regular DVDs.
And we have a whole collection of DVDs.
I just don't ever open them up.
If somebody gave me a CD,
I don't know what I would do with it.
Bang it against a rock?
I haven't bought a CD in a decade and a half.
I mean, yeah.
I mean, you just buy it online.
If you like it, you just click it.
It's so weird to be in a position where,
you know, I used to,
I mean, gosh,
I used to make mixtapes on tape.
Yeah, same.
Like tape tape.
Do you remember recording the radio?
Yeah.
You record the radio,
be sitting there like waiting
with your fingers over play and record.
At the same, you remember,
and you're like waiting for the song,
your jam to come on, like boom.
Especially when you listen to Top 40 or whatever.
Right.
Because you knew you'd catch the whatever.
You're going to get it.
You're like.
But the problem is, is Dick's going to talk through half of it. They did that shit on purpose to Top 40 or whatever. Right. Because you knew you'd catch the whatever. You're going to get it. You're like, come on. The problem is,
is Dick's going to talk through half of it.
They did that shit on purpose
to fuck with your recording.
To fuck with your recording,
fuckers.
Now,
that was old guys talking about technology.
That's our new podcast.
Oh.
Old guys talking about technology.
We should have that podcast.
That is our podcast.
What are you talking about?
Guys,
thanks for joining us.
We're going to stream next week.
We streamed this week on,
we streamed on Friday.
We're streaming again next week on Friday.
So Friday night, if you're free,
you want to join us.
We had a lot of fun this Friday.
Check us out next Friday
and then we'll switch back to Thursdays.
But we have to stream next week on Friday night.
So 9 p.m. Central, regular time,
but come check us out.
Come hang out with us.
Especially if you, you know,
you don't have,
especially if you don't have stuff to do on Saturday.
You could probably stay up in a weird place if you
live far away from the time zone
in which we're doing this. You could probably stay up and hang
out with us. But Friday night, next Friday,
come hang out with us, 9 p.m. Central.
We'll be streaming on,
of course, YouTube, Twitch, and Twitter.
Or Facebook, not Twitter.
Facebook. Facebook, yeah.
Alright, thanks for joining us.
We'll catch you next week, but we're going to leave you like we always do with the Skeptic's Creed.
Credulity is not a virtue.
It's fortune cookie cutter, mommy issue, hypno-Babylon bullshit.
Couched in scientician, double bubble, toil and trouble, pseudo-quasi-alternative,
acupunctuating pressurized
stereogram pyramidal free energy healing water downward spiral brain dead pan sales pitch
late night info docutainment leo pisces cancer cures detox reflex foot massage death and towers
tarot cards psychic healing crystal balls bigfoot, Bigfoot, Yeti, aliens, churches, mosques,
and synagogues, temples, dragons, giant worms, Atlantis, dolphins, truthers, birthers, witches,
wizards, vaccine nuts, shaman healers, evangelists, conspiracy, doublespeak, stigmata, nonsense.
Expose your sides.
Thrust your hands.
Bloody.
Evidential.
Conclusive.
Doubt even this. The opinions and information provided on this podcast are intended for entertainment purposes only. All opinions are solely that of Glory Hole Studios, LLC. Cognitive dissonance makes
no representations as to accuracy, completeness, currentness, suitability, or validity of any
information and will not be liable for any errors, damages, or butthurt arising from
consumption.
All information is provided on an as-is basis.
No refunds.
Produced in association with the local dairy council and viewers like you.