Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Bob Odenkirk, Edi Patterson, Tim Baltz, Heather Anne Campbell

Episode Date: October 9, 2023

Longtime friend of the show Bob Odenkirk joins Scott to talk about his new book “Zilot & Other Important Rhymes,” which he co-wrote with his two children. Then, W Hotel owner Bean Dip returns to talk about her experience with vampires. Later, LinkedIn’s Chief Innovation Officer Tom Boreman stops by to talk about what’s new at LinkedIn. Plus, Telli Charcuterie drops by to talk about directing animal mating encouragement videos for endangered species at the zoo.

How many ties could a hen tie ham if a hen tie could him ties? Welcome to comedy bang bang. I of course don't know what any of that means. But thank you to Roke. Roke for that catchphrase submission. I don't think it's going to stick as I have no idea what the definition of hen tie is. I don't know what it is. So I will not be saying that every week.

But nice try, Roke. Thank you so much. Welcome to the show. We have a great one. My name is Scott Ocarman. It's comedy bang-bang for another edition. We're deep, so deep in October right now. And we have a good show.

Coming up a little later, we have a corporate executive. We also have someone who works at a zoo. This, we're really running the gamut with guests today. But before we get to them let's get to our first guest, our guest of honors we are. He's a returning champion. He's been here since the very first year on the show. I remember episodes he did back in the radio station when we were there. He is of course, you know him from his AMC shows, like Hal Sal and the teacher who gets mildly annoyed.

The bad breakers. The bad breakers. I loved them. The game show. Yeah, of course. Hosted by Brian Kranson. Brian Kranson, one of the best game show hosts of all time. Chuck Woolery, Pat J. Jack, Brian Kranson.

In which contestants try to make a crystal meth, which wasn't illegal at the time. No, I think that's what people love to realize. It was actually in Coke. Yeah, people loved it back then. It was like, oh, okay, like that. It was actually in a lot of Doritos used it and it was in every thing.

Mountain Dew, they didn't realize it got you high. Fertilizer a lot of times. They used it in there. Fertilizer, stuff. And what's weird is buildings were made out of it. Buildings. Birds, birds had crystal meth in birds Naturally have crystal meth in them. Is that what you're saying? Yeah, exactly

You know, that's a way to make it sometimes is extracted a lot like you know Some of these like you and I you don't stand a dream of chrome. Yeah, right. Yeah But yeah, so that the by the way, I don't know if anyone's watched me Age on screen, but clearly a dream of chrome does not work I I have been a celebrity for at least 10 years that said I have been getting the baby blood You're 120 years old and It's it doesn't work. No, the portrait of Doreen Rage, that we know. Rying like hell. Q is right on target.

Q's got it all nailed down. Their exact Q is right. Yes, but it doesn't. But then you know, when we go to the Baye-the-Harvesting farms, and we drink the Adriana Chrome. Right. And it's supposed to be so tasty.

They're always telling you it's good. First of all, it's a little bitter. It's a little bitter. You know, they tell you like, oh no, it's got a sweet kind of, it's got a, yeah, but no, it's honestly, I wouldn't drink it for fun. No. And yet, and they tell you it's going to make you younger and that it's going to be this

and that and trying to make you pee more. I'll tell you that. If that's making us younger, look at us. Look at you. Well, look at you. There you as old as can be he of course was on those shows uh... and if now we all know him as an author this is his second book uh... and uh... his second book comes out this week it's called

zillett and a third book or fourth but uh... head what other i had the i had the book of short pieces, short pieces, called a load of who we. I'm considered that a book. I'm not. Neither does the Library of Congress. Did they take a look at it go pass? I didn't know you wrote two before the comedy drama comedy. Well, there's also the one with David the scripts Hollywood said no, not also not really before. But I didn't really write a book either. In book form. Yeah, sure. It's got pages. We can read on that pages. Yeah, trees died for. But let's say this is my third then. Okay,

third book. Yeah, it's called Zillett and other important rhymes. Please welcome back to the show. My Mr. Show buddy Bob Bob Oden. Hi everyone, listening. Good to be here. Happy to be here for this reason because this is the beautiful thing I ever made. You're pointing at me. Are you talking about when I wrote for you on Mr. Show? No, I thought you were the book. Oh, no, do I look like a book or something to you? For a moment there. I mean, yeah, there's a beautiful picture. I mean, my face. I wrote this book with my daughter,

and son, Aaron and Nate, when they were little kids. That's right, I remember you, it was so weird because there was a certain point in your life where you did not have either of those two people. They did not exist. That's right. The atoms and everything that cut out how they came into being.

Honestly. And then suddenly they're here, smash cut to now. Yeah. You've written a book with them. Yeah, that's weird. What is this book? Now I've read the book. Let's just full disclosure, I've read the book. I had the honor of being asked by Bob to blurb the book.

It is an honor. It truly is. And I bookstack a book. On your desk. That's the blurb. No, I believe I've only blurbed maybe three books. It was wonderful for you to ask me. I believe I made it to the back.

Well, you have a little kid, so you're thinking about kids. I am, and I'm reading a terrible, terrible books all day. I don't want to think about these children's books. I appreciate that yours is not like this. Okay. Now all children's books are designed to make the parents cry when they're reading it. Oh really? Yeah. They're all about like, and you're a special little girl. Yeah. Your daddy loves you. And they're all just like, when you came into the world, we all, we had nothing back in. And then we had something.

And it's like, dude, just write about a panda or something, like going on an adventure, I don't wanna sit here in tears in front of you. When I talk about this book, I always talk about like themes and stuff, but the truth is it's a bunch of silly rhymes. Right. And you knowing my sketch work,

know that this is just a version of my sketch brain that turned into poems for kids. Were you doing it like a sketch show? Like, you know how when you're, we had writer meetings on Monday morning, Brian Busay would be asleep. Jay would be plotting how to get to the capital. What's the best route?

But you know how when you're doing a sketch, when we were doing Mr. Show, like every idea that comes into your head, it sort of gets filtered into, well, okay, how do I turn that into a sketch? Right? I mean, maybe you were writing movies. I wasn't living like that. You were? No, because what was happening was we read a lot of books to our kids

We hit we as part of our you know goodnight time ritual of four things that we did we were the four Spanky would one well for both parents and Okay, I thank you you smake me then hitting punch against the face. Do 10 rounds. We would, you know, probably brush teeth. Yeah, that's very, we just started that clean up brush teeth. Then read books, pick like four little short books or maybe one longer and two shorter, but a lot of books like not just one. Yeah, we graduate three or more at a time because anytime I open one, she'll swipe it aside like she's on Tinder or something like that and she'll just like hit it out of my hands

and then like, lunge for the other one. Right, so there's always a couple. Then, say goodnight to like this select, there's like five things in the room. Like start with the light. The photograph, the light of teddy bear a Photo of this say good night say good night say good night and then go to bed So it's like three or four things there's probably more to it

I don't remember but it was the same. It's sort of to teach your brain that that now it's time to wind down now It's now we're heading towards go to slumberland. Slumberland. And then Mr. Sandman's gonna pay this. After reading so many books for so many years, and I think I would say Aaron was probably about four, Nate was six, I thought, you know, I want my kids to feel like they can contribute,

make things in the world, write, act, whatever. So let's write a poll. You want them to be nepo babies. No. But we all want that for our children. But you know, Scott, when you want to go into showbiz, there's the first thing you have to kind of get over is, am I allowed to do this?

Well, the first thing you have to do is convince your dumbass parents that it's like worth doing. Right. And if you can get over that hurdle, you have someone who's already there. God bless you. Right. That's like worth doing. Right. And if you can get over that hurdle, you have someone who's already there, God bless you. Right. That's how I feel about it.

So I just wanted them to experience that of going, you know, of writing something. Right. And then, so we did that, and that's what this book is. This is the original. So Bob brought the original, and you can see it's a bunch of loose pages.

Those are the right ones. For my either coming, I know it's a mess. And they're just terrible, most of them. Bill Bill went up the hill that he had spied from his window sill. He grew hungry for he'd forgotten a snack when he locked, looked at his house, his sister wave back.

Terrible. It's not good. I mean, doesn't mean do a few drafts. Anyway, that's not in the book, the final. But, so I just wanted to... You wrote that one, you were saying, you were telling me before that. That I wrote alone.

You're the most proud. That I wrote, it's spent hours on. No. So that last week, you were saying. Yes, so we had those, I saved them because literally I was like, there's like ten good ones in there. So I kept it thinking one day I'll be a grandparent and I'll write more and I'll maybe fix them up.

And then during the pandemic, my daughter Erin is now in art school, she went to Pratt. My son is a writer and let's clean those poems up, make them good and she could do the drawings. And the drawings are fantastic. She's really, really talented. Aaron Odenkirk, my daughter, and yes, isn't she something?

Yeah, they're really amazing. And they're like professional, like how old is she? She's probably 22. It's like if a 23 year old did it. That's right, yeah. That's right. She's like one year. One year, advance. She if a 23 year old. That's right. Yeah. That's right. She's like one year, advanced 23 year old. Somehow I got in the 23 year old. If you can get

randomly saw a 23 year old on the street, wave them down and say, can you draw? Can you draw? That's what I thought was going on. Yeah. Look at the credits. Because there's credits at the end. As there's a scene at the end, like a scene after the credits, post credits scene where Nick Fury comes in and recruits. Yes. recruits you to be in the avenger. I'm just trying to plant the seed.

But yeah, it's really, and so the all of the story, it's a collection of multiple short little poems. Silly. Silly poems. And there's a lot in there. When you sent it to me, I was kind of like, oh, a children's book, this will take, you know,

the normal time a children's book takes to read, three hours. Yeah. One letter at a time. Yeah, but this took me a whole calendar year to get the reading. There's 80 poems. Are there 80 in there?

There are 80. There's a lot in there. It's a lot. You could see how many we had to start. We actually had a lot. Yeah. So anyway, that's it. And if there's like themes in it, we use big words a lot, fun words, and we also sort of encourage other kids to write their own poems in the book. It's a really cool book. I mean, obviously, I thought it was your second, but apparently it's your third and a half. And it's the best one of the bunch. It is because it's the one I've read. I think I skimmed the one you wrote with

David. But you actually probably wrote some of that right. Is your name not on? I don't think I did. I doubt it. It's loose screenplays. Two loops. To lose the track. I stopped by. To lose the track. So I think it's a shout out at least. So wow, that was the top. In another land. But it's a really, really cool book. And what do you think? It's for ages three to nine. 69? Oh, okay. Yeah, it's for little kids. I mean, the kids were four, five, six, seven, and eight

when I wrote it. So it's all about things they were thinking about then. Right. So it's not for, like, Shell Silverstein is for like 14 12 older kids who can take some darkness This is not dark. It's like I was reading shell silver steam when I was six for some Well, look what how you turned out yeah, how would what about parents expect you? Destroyed you giving trees giving Yeah, yeah where it's like oh my god, and he's just a stump and everyone pees on him. That's right

We which it dish you have the unabridged edition. Everyone's just like, a huge dream. Those teenage and frat boys, they build a frat house with the remains of a log, and then they're famous with the remains of a log. And they pee onto the stump and then haze a kid by making him drink the pee such a wonderful story. And then he falls asleep with his head on the stump and he's thankful. And then he falls backward onto like a branch that was sticking up and it pierces his hearts, I think.

And again, you read the unabridged version. They no longer have the frat house, the frat party. Who put out this book, Bob? What's the publisher? The publisher's called Little and Brown. Little and Brown, I've never heard of this. They're one of the tops in the topsy turkeys. Oh really?

In the biz. In the children's book biz. Look at that logo. Tell me you've never seen it. That is an incredible logo. They put out loads of cell B. You know Little Brown. Not yet.

Because the books that I'm reading are purely just like, Well, you will know. Welcome to the world, little one. Yes, I know. Yeah. This is a thing. This is not a thing. What's start there? Here's a mirror. Come back tomorrow after you get that angry book. The angry teaching book. God damn it. Well, it's wonderful that you wrote this book and I, thanks buddy. I would say, I would hope it's going to be so popular. There's going to be a sequel.

Could you write a sequel or are you tapped out with all the good or are you going to put that poem you read earlier in there? We could write more. But I actually, what I would love to do is some of the pieces in here are really, I just like the spirit of them. The one about the kid who goes to the wedding and wrecks everything, but he's still really proud of himself. I like, I would like to make like a little animation. Oh, I love that. Yeah, it could be like a, I mean, they used to do that with book.

My opinion was back in the 50s and stuff like that. There were so few things. Yes, it was like, yeah, in the world, it was just like, oh, there's a book. Well, let's turn it into a cartoon, too. Yes, we don't have any cartoons. You know, and now there's everything. Right. So it's like, what?

Well, that's what I was thinking, you know. But I was everything that we already made. There's too much. Yeah. And this is my opinion, and I think you agree with me, Bob, is if you're a content creator, for everything you make, you gotta delete something old.

Oh, I love that. Yeah. So I'm gonna delete like, it's a wonderful life. I'm gonna get rid of the breaking bad. Breaking all of breaking bad down. With just for this book. No, this gets to live, but the next thing I do, the next thing no matter what it is, you get rid of it. doesn't matter what it is, you get rid of all seven seasons, five

minute monologue for stage. I asked that they remove breaking bad. I have that in my contract. Okay. If I ask, you will remove it from all that seems like such a, it's a lot of how you hear a thing. They just hit I scribbled it in and nobody knew. That's the thing. I just, all I wrote is, gets to remove from all platforms entire show. A lot of people don't know that one trick that all agents hate. Well, I'm going to put that on YouTube. That one trick that all agents hate.

Well, it's really fantastic. Thanks, buddy. I'm so appreciative that I got to be a minor part on the back which is the best blurb. And I'm not getting nice. I wrote a few of them and you picked one of them and mine was probably the least sincere out of all of them. I know, everybody else.

Everyone else did a nice one. When I read everyone else's, I was like, oh, was I supposed to do a sincere one? No, you gave us gold with your nonsense. Well, it's really fantastic, Bob. It's out this week. Everyone can get it at all their local booksellers as well as their national booksellers as well as,

I'm gonna go out on a lemon's egg, international booksellers as well. People who don't sell books, you probably will not be able to get it from. Thanks. Thanks for the coaster. I don't know. I wreck this table. Oh sure. Oh, I thought you were saying you're gonna take it with you. No, I wouldn't want to destroy these wonderful signatures that are on this table, including several people you've worked with.

Yes. Well, Bob, we need to get to our next guest if that's okay. Are you okay? I'm ready. I wanna meet people. I was told I'd get to meet some interesting people. This is, it used to be the show where we talked to interesting people. Now it's not that anymore.

Humanity's podcast. And we're thinking of calling it humanity and the animal kingdoms podcast. We're not quite sure, because that would include bugs. And I hate bugs. I want bugs to die. Right.

Yeah, how do you feel about bugs? Yeah, I don't need them. Um, I think some people like them a lot. And I just don't get it. They talk about ants like, oh, they're vital. They're so vital. Yeah. Right. What the fuck are they doing? They make ant hills. Who's gonna make ant hills? Well, let's take let's get to our next guest. She is the owner and proprietor of the W Hotel in Los Angeles. Well, see, Matt, a beautiful hotel. A beautiful hotel, although I don't know how much of that is due to her involvement,

but she also sells kisses to all of the people who pass through the halls there. Please welcome back to the show, Bean Dip. Hi, how's it going? Hi, man. Hey Please welcome back to the show Bean Dip. Hi, how you doing? How you doing? Hey, how's it going, Bean Dip? That's going great, man, but you got some information wrong. Oh, I'm so sorry.

What did I get incorrect? Well, because the kids are giving out in the bliss spot. I'm just in a hallway, dude. It's all a brothel. But have you kissed people in the hallways? Yeah, so of course. If I'm affectionately drawn, sit there. Okay, so I mean, I'm not wrong necessarily.

Well, you're wrong because that's not how the W's make a money bitch, okay? Okay, I apologize. This is Bob Odin Kirk. I know who Bob Odin Kirk is. I'm a huge fan of Bob. Oh, hi, BDip. Never met you and you seem fascinating

and how long have you been at the W? Oh, I've been on it. I've only on the Hollywood W's. I don't want to mess with all the other was. I've owned it for about six years, six and a half, six years. And you work there? Well, I work there in the spa. Sometimes I went off the like it and I got to go see like is everybody running this? Okay. Is this up to the looks, the restantos? Are they doing like everything to make everybody feel very special when they're staying here.

Right. Yeah. And you're sort of like a concierge or a... It's a lot undercover boss. Oh wait you're an undercover boss but everyone knows you own it. That's right. But they just think oh she's here to hang out. She wants to have a good time but I'm making statistics in my head. Oh, I see. Okay. Are you wearing a disguise while you're there? Usually, yes. Where are you dressed up?

Like, usually like a, you know, for those movies, like, where they go to balls and stuff. Like, I'm with the wearers. Oh, like a big dress, like a flouncy dress. A flouncy dress. Oceans seven or eight. Sort of like Ocean's eight,

but if it was way back from all the days. And Cinderella. A penny code. Yes. Many penny codes. I thought one about six, seven, eight penny codes. And the word Bob uses is correct. Flouncy, because every step on a take is like,

oh, she's going to go, she's going to go. You make a lot of noise. Yeah. People love you being there. Have you ever been asked to leave her? Well, I'm gonna ask to leave with Somebody else. If you're like, please come away with me. I got it But nobody's asking me to leave because it's mine. Oh, so you're the you're the person in charge of the balls. Is that what you're saying? I'm in charge of the W Scott

Okay, she's in charge of the W Scott. I apologize. She's in charge of the W. I'm in charge of the W. No, I apologize. I'm just trying to sift through this story. Okay, man. And I got to go check on it in my dress, undercover boss. And then if anybody does anything wrong,

what they're working, then I just go, hey, come over here with me. We're just going to go to a ball. And then I push them out of the w and they cannot ever come back. They're excommunicated. They're excommunicated. I see. So the dress has a double value. Both it's welcoming and delightful. But also it gives you cover for, hey you. Get out. We're having a ball. Yeah. Have any of the employees wised up to your tactic? No.

Have any of them said, oh, no thanks. And just knock on with you. No, because I think the dress tends to have like an effect like... Hypnotic effect. Hypnotic effect like, would you get glamored like for vampires? Oh, I see. Okay. Like if they're like knock on your window and if anything and you was like, oh, don't look

over there. That's a vampire. Don't look too long. Has it ever happened to you, Binda? Is that right? You can't have me. Yes, dude. Yes. So vampires have come to your windows?

They've asked him to the window, floated up like, send them a lot. They're all not your knock. Come on, let us in. We need permission. At this point, I would think a vampire would be like, God, I wish these other vampire movies aren't out there. They've tipped everyone off to the fact

that we float up to windows and that, and knock, knock, knock on people. Exactly. Now you can just be like, dude. I do. Not today. Not today, devil. But I'm fixing to put a black cloth in front of my eyes,

so I don't look at you even though I want to. Yeah, oh, you do. Have you ever let a vampire in or? I let one in once, but I was too fast for her Too fast for a vampire because vampires are quick beans. I mean they are so quick This a lot speed a lot of deal, but I was too fast sort of like mentally. Oh Okay, you're out smarting. I'll smart that I oh, okay. What did you how would that have? Oh, man I can't wait to eat some blood

They're so kids next door. Let's go get it off So you're pretending to be a vampire yourself playing possum. I was pretending to be a vampire bar play possum pretend We gonna eat some kid blood next door. She got very excited. She's like, oh great would let's go knock on the windows Then the second she was out a I closed the door locked it. That's how you did it. Oh, is it daytime? It was night or else she would have burned Bob. Oh, yeah.

So do vampires, I've always wondered about this. Do vampires need to be then invited in again? Or is the first time like a blanket you can come in whenever you want? This is a great question, Scott, because many people don't know that it was like this. If you can come in whenever you want. This is a quite good question, Scott, because many people don't know that it works like this. If you let them in one time, they are not allowed in the next time,

unless you do a hand motion. Oh, okay. Oh, wow. So, it's like, come on in, we can't do it. Just like, even just to like, yeah, yeah, come on. Yeah, that's for almost several body muscles, because they just go, hey, and then the vampires, they have full permission. I think vampires also could sometimes prey on people.

You know how you ever see someone in the wild and you think you know them and you're just kind of like, hey, and then you realize you don't know them. I bet that vampires that happens all the time and they get to go in. Because people just think they know. I bet when a vampire knocks on your window, you're like, oh, it's my friend.

Yeah, coming in. Totally. Especially here oh, it's my friend. Yeah, come on in totally a Special here Hollywood California, USA. Yeah, everybody thinks. Oh, that's how that's a person that I know from watching the TV show I love yeah, there's the boss from the streamer. I pitch to yes, there's a boss for no streamer on pitch There's the father of the baby who's a Drenacrome. I. That's right. There's a, oh, there's my adrenaline crome source. There's the father of the five. How much adrenaline crome do you have a day? Bob and I were talking about this having before you got here.

You know, I put like about 18, 19 droppers into some water in the morning. That's good. That's a good amount. Maybe that's what we need, Bob. No, we're not to age. You mean, have some more than that? Yeah, more.

Yeah, more like. Oh, yeah, how much are y'all doing? Just like a teaspoon a week. I don't know. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date.

I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date.

I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don't want to date. I don I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. A lot of people don't know that about. They think it's so hard that there's one pizza place. That was actually ping pong.

Anyway, every pizza place. Every pizza place has a big thing. Oh, I think that was every, that's great to know. But do you guys offer that at your spot at Dream of Chrome Street? We don't, yeah, but we are in talks with sort of a country. Yeah, countries.

Yeah, because you have to kidnap children. Yeah, it's a whole deal. We're like, yeah, the whole deal is a whole deal. It's a whole deal. And I really resonate with me. Don't go into that business. Yeah, that is hard business because I'm not trying to kidnap kids forever.

And I'm like, if we are going to kidnap for limited amount of time, I want them to be treated right. I want them to learn to come. You should be allowed to kidnap children for two days. Two days and parents should be able to come. So then it's the whole other thing you gotta get into. It's a lot.

Insurance, by the way. For the other part of it, it's a whole insurance deal. If you kidnap a child for even just two days, suddenly, don't get me started. Suddenly everybody's breaking down. Well, being dip, it's great to have you. I like to bring you around for the entire show. We need to take a break here.

Scott, I want to get to. I'd love to stick around for the entire show and sit by a bob and talk to the other guests. Okay, that sounds like a deal. Okay. Okay, we need to take a break. When we come back, we have a corporate exec. We also have someone who works at a zoo.

Bob, this is a packed show. It is. And again, you're pointing out, you're ranging all over society. Yeah, all the women in the beautiful dress. You wore one today, by the way. I did, because I'm gonna glamour y'all bitch. It's a night I feel hypnotized right now. I feel like my eyes glazing over while I talk to you

It may just be boredom. I'm not quite sure no, it's not border. That's all your hormones Jumping your hormones a jump it we need to take a break I need to go to the washroom just to splash some cold water on my face when we come back We're gonna have more Bob Bowden Kirk more bean comedy bang bang. We'll be right back after this. Comedy bang bang. We're back. Bob Odin Kirk. Hi. Author of Zillett and other important rhymes along with Nate and Aaron Odin Kirk. And I read something Nate wrote for. Was it the New Yorker? Yeah. Yeah. He was very good. Oh, good. Very funny. He's a very funnyer. Yeah, he was very good. Oh good very funny

Yeah, he's a very funny guy. Yeah, he's a right and great comedy sketch type stuff. Yeah good stuff. Thanks congratulations You gonna have any more kids? No, just comedy pieces I'm gonna open a birth more comedy pieces wonderful. I've always felt you were the most successful with that So I mean your kids are great. I'm better at that. We also have bean dip. Bean dip. You're gonna have your kids or you know, I do have a couple. But why did no? Yeah. How many? Well, you know, there's a cup, too. Well, I guess usually a couple is two, but I mean exactly two. Exactly a couple. Right. When people say a couple, that could mean anything from, you know,

two to 59 or something like that. Yeah. Plus 10. Yeah. And that, you know, they, they've really enjoyed living in Europe. Oh, they're in Europe now. They're in boarding school or... That right now, one of them is at boarding school and one of them is like running like a baguette shop.

Oh, okay. So they are totally two different ages. Or there- Yeah, once 10 and one is like, I think 50 is a working age. Oh, okay. For bag at shops. For bag at shops, yeah. Yeah, if you serve alcohol, it might be 16. Maybe a good point, Scott.

Well, that's great. I bring them by the studio sometime, if you ever- Sure, if they feel like it, I'm not trying to force those to do anything to be in showbiz No way, I don't want them to show this What about in working in the hotel industry? You know they would do guided to W And I would love for them to come up with a sub active fancy Get in the W do some stuff because sometimes I get busy and I need somebody else to put on the dress and go there and put

Hand it on me I guess you could hire someone but you'd rather have your children. I'd rather have my children do it. I'd rather have Jarpie and Linoche. Jarpie and Linoche? Yeah. That's their names. Yeah. Beautiful name. Why did you name? Who's the father by the way? Well, I'm asking. Bobby kind of a volley. Oh, of course. Why did I even ask? Always the answer. Yeah, always probably kind of a lot. You ask any woman who's the father.

It's always classic. You always get the same name. You always get the same name. All about, I don't know. All right, well, we need to get to our next guest. He's a corporate exec. And I believe I spoke to him once, maybe eight years or so ago, seven years or so ago,

out there on the road, but please welcome back to the show Tom Borman. Hi, Scott, how are you doing? I'm good, good. This is Bob Odin Kirk. Hi, Tom, how are you? Great, Bob, great to see you. Good to see you.

Being dip to your right there. Hi, being dip. Looking great in that flouncy dress. Oh, thanks, man. You look great in your shirt. I don't know. I would call that shirt flouncy as well. Yeah, good.

What exactly is that? I bought it three sizes too big because my dryer tends to shrink things. Okay, so you're still at the beginning of your dryer cycle on this? Absolutely. You're looking at a brand new shirt. Oh, okay. Well, thank you're still at the beginning of your drier cycle on this? Absolutely. You're looking at a brand new shirt. Oh, okay.

Well, thank you for buying something, Brett. I would next time you're on a show and you're trying to look good, I would buy the shirt six months in advance and then drive it a few times. But apologies for not looking good on something that people are listening to and not seeing. All right. I don't know that you need to get so testy with me. I mean, we have mepple for Tom. Did we get along last time we met?

I did. Look, I'm going to be honest. I don't remember talking to you to get so testy with me. I mean, we have mepple for Tom. Did we get along last time we met? I did, look, I'm good to be honest. I don't remember talking to you. We got along swimmingly. We talked about the beautiful website, LinkedIn.com. Oh, wait, you work for LinkedIn, is that what? Absolutely, I'm a student. I constantly get asked to join LinkedIn,

but I don't know why I would. I think more people leave every day than actually join. But that's what they're selling, right? Right, leaving. They're selling a platform where people are leaving and than actually join. But that's what they're selling, right? Leaving. They're selling a platform where people are leaving and drugs. People with a lot of females. Would you like to leave LinkedIn?

Oh, wait, no, you're not even a member. But then you go, yes, and then they go, okay, join. Okay, join and then leave. Yeah. Absolutely. I used to be the executive vice president of creativity and innovation. But I've recently been promoted to chief innovation officer and executive

vice president of getting linked. Wow. Wow. Well, chief innovation officer. Yes. It's a new title that reflects my rise within the corporate ranks. What kind of stuff do you do for chief innovations? Well, I try to take the LinkedIn.com website to newer and greater heights. What does that entail, like a different mast head or? Mast head, yes. Mast head. I said, or that I trailed off hoping you would like, jump in and correct me, but it really is just the mast head.

I was going to say mast head or something better than mast head. But I haven't charged a corporate branding, if that's what you were trying to hint at. But logo. Mast head. Absolutely. But logo. Mass head. Absolutely. logo. What are some other synonyms of mass head?

An antiquated word almost no one uses. Oh, Scott, you're making here. I'm so mad. I don't I don't understand why you are seething with anger right now. I know. Absolutely. Fuming. I look like a character from Amy Polar's Pixar movie.

The one who's angry. Oh, inside out is what you're talking about. Yes. Not elemental where everyone, like, everyone on fire looks like they're angry because their heads are on fire. Haven't seen it yet. Canton Dorset, which is a key feature of LinkedIn.com. Oh, well, endorsing things is a key feature of LinkedIn.

That's right. Let's talk about what's the same at LinkedIn.com. Oh, can't. Yeah, what's really the same. One of the key principles of LinkedIn.com is the inbox feature, which has significantly less functionality as regular email. Okay, so that's what you're selling. Absolutely. It's a key selling point for LinkedIn.com.

You can connect to business professionals in your field of expertise or in other fields of expertise or in other fields of expertise, and you can communicate with them through the LinkedIn inbox, which is very diminished in terms of functionality. So this is, okay, so there are a lot of choices when you want to communicate with someone. You can talk directly to them. Yeah. That's not always available to us. Sometimes we're in different parts of the country.

That's right. You can't always be face to face. Right. So then a lot of people would say, like, okay, let's text each other because that's direct communication at least. But then a lot of people are like, let's take this one step removed and put it on a platform, like Google. And now LinkedIn goes another step removed from there where you now you sign into a place and you communicate solely through this one thing that you're not on all the time. Is that what it is? Scott, after that explanation, I would endorse your scale of explaining things in a very obtuse way. I'd also endorse you for loving Hantai.

I don't even know what it is, sir. Hantai, you doth protest too much. I protested once. You got roasted, Scott. He's nailing you, dog. Thank you, being deep. I'd endorse you for being right on the money Thanks. I hope I can get a door spot linked and calm absolutely now. Let's talk about what's new at LinkedIn calm Okay, so that was what was old. No, that's what was the same. Oh, I'm sorry a different terminology That's the same now. It's what's new. Yes, what's new? A lot of websites have two factor authentication

where you can either authenticate that you are using your account with a cell phone number or an email. We offer three factor authentication. Wow. Authentication, but all right. That's a lot of authentication. Another love.

Thank you. You have been endorsed again for your obtuseness. My obtuse is just for correcting the pronunciation of a word. I've been bullied for my pronunciation of words my entire line. Motherfucker. Oh, you are nothing. I can't seem to get it right. Let me let me let me take you through syllable by syllable. You say it correctly. Mother fucker. Wow, you hurt my feelings. Okay, this is the problem. Anyone that tries to explain it to you, then you get your feelings hurt.

Yes, absolutely. Now, back to the lecture at hand, to quote, Dr. Dre. I get it. You've got Dr. Dre, a big hip hop fan? Love Dr. Dre. Do you have his albums? He's only made two that I can think of three, actually.

Name them. Chronic, Chronic 2001 or whatever it is, and then that other one, Compton. There. You sound like a real fan. You're the one who said, are you a fan? I said, well, I've got his three albums. That doesn't mean that I'm like a rabid fan

or anything like that. I'm a casual fan at best. So if an artist puts out only a certain amount of things and you own all of the things that they've put out, you would call yourself a casual fan. I'm a casual, oh look, I don't even know that Bob wrote four books supposedly. That's rude, that's being rude to your guest.

I'd like to be rude to you because right now, you are not my favorite guest, I have to say. Well, that's consistent with the first time I was on the your guest. I'd like to be rude to you because right now you are not my favorite guest, I have to say. Well, that's consistent with the first time I was on the bad guest. Did we fight last time you were on the podcast? I think you fight with most of my characters. Most of you what? Oh, I love to do characters. I'm afraid of impressions. Bob was nodding. I'd like to endorse Bob for not gaslighting me when Scott is treating me poorly. You think I'm treating him poorly, Bob? Would you know, I think his passive aggressive responses are not upsetting you as much as they should.

Really? You think I'm the one who should be more of this? Yeah. I like this. I want to say that I get why you've been elevated because your ability to be passive aggressive in a way that is almost hard to grasp. I'm sure you do your job wonderfully and you never. It's almost like you're a passive aggressive bitch

who's insulting me, but you're also so boring while you're doing it that I just zone out. So it's like you get the best of both worlds. Yes, you know, where you get to say whatever it is you want and yet I am so bored with you talking that I don't pay attention. Wow. I'd like to say it's something I've heard for the first time, but unfortunately it's not.

Every time I text Scott Ockermann, I get a voice memo back that basically says, Why aren't you linking messaging me? Why not? Because of the reduced functionality. Why is it reduced? Is it just out of date or was the company taking steps to reduce it? Think of all the things that you can do with email, whether you use Yahoo, Gmail, Hotmail, or other forms of inbox functionality.

Thank God you could only remember three. I could sense you going for ten. Would you like to hear ten? Sure. Too bad. Hey, Tom. When you say you do characters, do you do them at the LinkedIn offices? Absolutely. I'm the biggest stitch up in the office. Do some of your stuff. Yeah. Who do you guys go into the office still? Or you just on Zoom doing

characters? We put shot collars on our employees and forbid them from remote work. So anytime anyone tries to leave the office, they get zapped. But that would be, that would be bad. Is it anytime anyone tries to leave and then do work from a different location they get zapped? Absolutely. Well, we zapped them indiscriminately.

Oh, I see. Except when they're at work, then you wouldn't. Then we would never zapped them. That's called corporate training. I see. So, but aren't, is anyone ever just at home sleeping and they get zapped? Absolutely.

Sometimes an itchy trigger finger means that someone's going to get zapped. Also, we're a global company. So I might think I'm zapping you at 3 p.m. but really I'm zapping somebody else at 4 a.m. in their country. Seems like that should be something you would be able to keep track of.

Who you're zapping, what time you're zapping. Absolutely, but we're not machines, we're humans, and we're fallible. And is that your logo? Or that's your slogan for the company, we're not machines, we're humans. We're fallible. On the mast head.

By, yes, on the mast head. The, our corporate crest, if you will. Tom, is anybody, we could get some merch with that on it? I would love to do merch. Does anyone here have massed head capabilities? Oh, I don't know. I don't have a 3D printer. Is that what you're asking me?

What are you trying to make guns and kill people? Who has a 3D printer unless they're part of the queue movement? That should be like a tip off to the CIA or the FBI or something. If anyone buys a 3D printer, it's like, oh, okay, this guy's gonna try to make a gun and kill someone. Absolutely. Did you see in the line of fire, starring Clint Eastwood? I did. He makes a little plastic gun. Does he not?

Well, no, the villain does. The villain, well, when I say he, I mean, the villain. Obviously Clint Eastwood doesn't. Right. Yes. Clint Eastwood seethes with anger when he sees it. He does because that guy slipped one past his Defences and I believe it's a wooden gun that fires a real bullet. Oh, that's yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, wooden gun And it's got a little slingshot in it right? I do a great impression of John Malikovich

That's him going about his day So we're he's not really speaking to anyone because he's alone? Yes. Could you do him like actually talking to anyone or? What are you doing? Something like that. That's great, man. I mean, not the Bob, you do impressions, Bob, right?

Who do you do? Gorf. Who's Gorf on golf? Well, I remember Gorf on golf. I remember Gorf on golf, but you do gore from don't don't It's a look it's me on my knees talking about dog lung green I'd love to see a little bit of it. Do you we do some or well? I'll do some sure get on your yeah get down. I know okay, Bob is getting down on the floor and

Hi, it's me gore. Have you seen any dog? down on the floor and hi it's me Gorf have you seen any dolphin green movies recently have you Gorf he hasn't made any recently maybe he's made a lot of great movies he's in the expendable series he's in the expendables he's very good in that anyway I'll get up now oh that's my character pretty good a similar voice to your own have you ever seen a door fine golf videos we used to watch it in your office? But you know what? They used to sell them. They used to be commercials for them and they would sell tapes to lonely fathers. We give them away for free. I'd link in premium. A new feature that costs zero for a trial run. Oh, okay. I don't know that I'm going to sign up for LinkedIn. I'm you absolutely

should. Scott, please respond to my emails. Those are you personally. Absolutely. Is that mainly one of your duties is to send all of those emails. If I sign up for LinkedIn, will I stop getting invitations to be on LinkedIn? You'd like to think so. Wouldn't you? The answer unfortunately is a resounding no. I don't know. What's the, what's, what, what, why would I get another internet? Is what it is. Absolutely. It has less, less things to do. Less functionality.

We're capturing on the nostalgia of the 90s when things were simpler. And Clinton was sticking his penis wherever he wanted. Oh, dang, talk. Was he really sticking it wherever he wanted? Geez, bean dip is drooling. Because I Because I can only think of two places he stuck it. Well, he stuck it in my hand. Is that one of them? What? Wait, I guess we do know that. Hold on, hold on. Why didn't you lead with this? The former president of the United States,

while he was president, stuck his penis into your hand. I was on a White House tour of all things. I held out my hand to try to wash it in a drinking fountain in the White House. The next thing I knew, water wasn't coming into my hand, but President Clinton was. But also you were gonna wash your hands at a drink fountain? Yeah, absolutely.

I go into a restroom. Yeah, come on Tom, you'll be a discursing. I didn't have to urinate, I just needed wet hands. Do you think that he was already gonna stick his penis there and you just happen to put your hands out there to wash them and he was surprised by that? So you think it was a happy coincidence. Well, let me tell you who wasn't happy about it. Me when I find myself stroking off President Clinton. Let me talk about the Boolean search because that's actually the key. Oh, I remember talking about this. Successful ingredient for LinkedIn.com.

Right. Boolean is a high powered search engine that allows you to find anything related to your career or whatever you'd like on LinkedIn.com. Boolean, like meat sauce, like Boolean. Like Ryan's a Julian, like Marguerite's. Boolean. Yes.

Boolean, like Boolean. Oh. You could Boolean search for Bolinies. Do you know what you'd find? What? Everything related to Bolinies. That exists on LinkedIn or that exists anywhere. I wouldn't suggest searching for that LinkedIn.

You'd find very few hits. Maybe a chef? Of course, someone who's proud of their Bolinies recipe. Sure. Wait, so Boolean is a different thing other than LinkedIn? Boolean is a high powered search engine. I knew you just said that. Boolean stands is an acronym, the B stands for Boolean. So don't go to LinkedIn, go to Boolean and type in LinkedIn.

Uh-oh, I've made things more confusing. That's your work as an innovation officer. There we go. Bob, I would say that Bob gets me to my core. Bob Odin Kirk is inside me, understanding me. I am, I am. This guy's good at what he does. I guess he is. I think he's got a job for life.

Yeah, were you grandfathered into this? Are you like the Nepo baby of LinkedIn? Yes, your father. My father is Richard LinkedIn. I knew it. And he named the company knew it. He pronounced it in. He named it company after himself. He did.

It originally was the LinkedIn project, right? Yeah, some people say every American was original for the LinkedIn family. So wait, you're a descendant of Abraham LinkedIn? Is this why Bill Clinton did all that? Is it like a president, a president kind of thing? Or absolutely. It was an inside joke among some of the most powerful people in our country's history.

Scullin' bones. Yes, bones going into skulls, if you know what I mean. I think I do. At least one bone going into your skeleton of your hand, along with all that flesh around it. Scott, what's your favorite hole? You could say anything, the whole the meteor created the cure, the dinosaurs or my mouth. I'm gonna go somewhere in

between Jackson. Okay. Jackson hole. Yes, that's in between my mouth and the meteorite. Somewhere. Scott, it's been great to be here. Oh, thanks, you're ending your own segment. I appreciate that. He's walking out the door. We always appreciate someone ending their own segment. Goodbye. And they're out of gas calling my shot. Bye Tom. Shooting my shot and calling it.

No Tom, come on. Just like president stick back around. Stick back around. We'll end your segment if you stick around. Is that okay? Absolutely. All right. I'd love to talk about LinkedIn's premium features.

No, thank you. We're going to ask you. Are there any? You can see who viewed your profile. And then you can click a button that said, are you interested in my professional career or were you just masturbating in my profile picture? Oh, that's cool.

That's a cool, I guess that's a cool feature. All right, let's take a break. When we come back, we have someone who works at a zoo. I think this is a good guest. I think this will be someone that we're very interested, Bob, you ever been to a zoo? I have. How many zoos have you been to in your life?

Oh, boy, 15, 20, 30, 30, 30, zeroes. I've been to a lot of zoos. How many hours do you spend at each zoo, would you say? I try to give it a couple days. Sure, or zoo. So we're talking like 60 days in a zoo in your life. Those are good zoo stats. I honestly, I'll go I went to the zoo alive

Yeah, when my kids were a little yeah, just in the Okay, Naomi keep the kids. I gotta go to the zoo again. They're dangerous places And if your child were to be hurt or Devoured sure let's face it. It wouldn't be your fault necessarily In fact, you would look like a hero. You brought your kid to the zoo. Sure. Yeah, but then this thing happened. This hippo happened to attack. Right. Yeah. Okay. Well good. Well, we're going to talk to someone who works at the zoo. When we come back, we're going to have more Bob Odin Kirk, more bean dip, more Tom Bourman. Yeah. But we'll be right back with more comedy bang bang after this scat let's go to the break uh... uh...

uh... comedy bang bang we're back bob oden kerck is here also zillett and other important rimes uh... out in stores now uh... you do in any kind of events oh boy what you do yes well this uh... will play the week that we're touring the country we're going to

be in new york in boston in New York and Boston and Chicago and San Francisco and North Carolina, Charlotte, Savannah, my daughter, Aaron and I are gonna do book fairs and book signings and presentations and arts festivals. A lot of time. Really gonna be great. Yeah, well, she's traveling several wanted to end it. It's quickly as possible. But, that's spandex.

So how can people get information about where you're going to be? Just go online, zillet, Bob Odin Kirk tour, and they should tell you. Do a boolean search on this tour. Yeah, do a boolean search. Yes. Bollin yees, eat some boolean yees, get on LinkedIn. We also have a big... Speaking of LinkedIn, we have Tom Boreman here. You've been like sobbing for the entire break. What is happening here? and you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know,

you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you

know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you know, you I like Agassi and Bean Dip is here as well. Yeah, I would like to not see this stuff either Scott. Okay, look, I don't even know what it is. I'm surprised it's Hentai because I don't know what the definition is. But you keep shoving it at me and talking. Well, sure, I'm interested in it, but I don't know what,

like you say I'm so interested in Hentai, I don't know that I am, I don't know what this stuff is, I just know that I like it. But you have a huge collection on me, you are sliding a stack over that. But you have a huge collection. I mean, you are slotted in a stack over that it's the size of a small man. Or a very large dog. It's taller than Gorf was.

Yeah, not tall, but pen tie. Hentai, yeah, Bob, you, what do you think of pen tie? You don't know what it is either, right? I have no idea what it is. No, exactly. We have no idea. All right, We need to get to our next guest Works in a zoo That's what more do you need to know? No, please welcome telly shark cuter a

Doing nice get to be here. I'm really excited to see it's got hi telly so good to so good to meet you Hi, it's really nice that you guys were talking about Hentai right before I'm on the island. Oh, is that something you're aware of? It's adjacent to the job that I do. Good. How adjacent are we talking? Oh, well, I produce and direct animal mating

encouragement videos at the zoo for our endangered species. Oh uh if you go online on x-serve facebook they will use the derogatory term animal pornography but that is not what we call it in in in the industry. I see so there are certain endangered species like a... White rhino, pandas. Pandas. Sure.

And certain kinds of antelope. I don't know if you guys have heard this, Emperor Penguins lost a huge amount of ice this year. And anything you can do to encourage them to mate, in captivity is... It's good for the planet. It's good for the planet. Love animals, I love animals love not bugs though, right?

You know, you know if you find an endangered bug for example the bee I do produce pornography for bees and and is the pornography other bees or is it just humans? Well it depends on how Endangered the animal is Wait, so it's humans if they're very endangered danger the animal is. So it's humans if they're very endangered. If it hold it well, for example, I'm in danger of

jacking off to these videos. We have a white rhino who, who, you know, it's very hard to find an additional white rhino. Right. Try filming those two white rhinos.

They get confused when they see themselves on the television. I see. So you're almost making pornography starring them for them to then make more white red. Again, it depends on how endangered the animal is. So in certain circumstances, you get like a long necked orangutan. And those animals, you can get, there's like 50 or 60 in captivity all over the world. So you can get a couple random ones to star in

a video. And you show it to a different orangutan. That's the dream. That's the dream. My God, what a lot of work. It's a huge amount of work. You have to get them to agree to participate in the video. Yeah. They sign releases all the time. A lot of them are on strike currently in solidarity, but we do get full-time.

And this all happens in the San Fernando Valley in little hotel, shitty hotels. Yeah, the one that looks like a zoo, because we want them to be comfortable. Right, so a zoo-themed hotel. Yeah, we bring the animals in, they enjoy one other, there's company on camera, and we show.

Are you surreptitiously filming like in through, to a mirror? Like a hidden camera? Yeah, yeah pornography. It's not I'm not a I'm not a fucking disgusting animal job I'm so real industry some pornography where it's secretly filmed right? That's not I mean I'm it depends on where you're finding that Hintie Scott. Sam you're seeing a lot No, so you're doing that you're doing this with consent with that they sign releases you doing it in the room

You're getting close ups. Yeah, and the speed up allow this is just on board. Oh, they're there They're using on set. They're they're making sure that we had we shot something on a show that we did and we had Flies in the scene. Oh, right. Remember we had PETA there. Oh, that's right. Yeah. And have you ever, in the member, the woman from PETA said, you have 12 flies. All that matters is when you're done shooting, you need to have 12 flies. Right. And then when we accidentally killed all the flies and so we had to run around the stooot the lot, basically like, actually, we actually shot.

I'm Hollywood Boulevard. Yeah. We had to run around catching flies all day. And we finally came up with 11 and she was like, eh, enough. Do you penis there? Yeah, penis. I'm said Well, he also is very close to Peter like a like a penis Skat Scott the Peter principle you brought it up earlier. I did now it's in scat head. Yeah, this is how we're I don't know what you want me to do with that information

I don't want what you want me to do with that information. I don't know what I want you to do. I don't know what words sound like words. Sure. How, like bag, that sounds like. How do you know it? An animal has agreed. I mean, how do you really know that their own game was it? Well, you, it's a double confirmation system. So you get both vocal and signature.

Signature from an animal is usually a paw or snout print. Paw print, yeah, yeah. And what is the vocal? Is that whatever sound like a cow go moo? Yeah, you can tell the infant animal is distressed or happy, so you get a cow that goes moo for, if cows are endangered, they are not. They are not.

Thank God. I've never had to shoot cow pornography. But yeah, you get the vocal consent and the physical signature, really. It's like two factor authentication. Nice callback. Yes, indeed. Did you talk any faster?

Not possible. Doctors have tried. COVID made it worse. Oh, no, I'm so sorry. Yeah, you are a little bit worse the last time I saw you. Absolutely. So you're doing, so is it all, like if you get a really juicy piece,

like the two white rhinos, right? Again, there's only one, this is one of the few circumstances where there is a human dress as a rhinoceros. That's what happens is if you can't get them. If you can't get, yeah. The way dress as a rhinocerite. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So you don't want to confuse the rhinoceruses that you're showing. Do you have a question? Can I ask you something? Do your porn films have stories? Well, recently we've tried a couple, it's been slim-picking. Do you know those pandas, no matter what kind of shit you're holding?

Can't get them horny. They will not get horny. They sleep for like 23 hours a day. Yeah. What kind of, it's all easy. Yeah. Disgusting. But, uh, but we have recently been introducing stories to the videos. Yeah. Uh, we have, you know, two, I got a question. Do some of your directors and actors kind of really want to get into the straight show biz and they're starting in the animal porn? You mean, is, are any of these animals graduating to say,

like a NBC sitcom or... Sure, like that part of the video is on aspirations too. Yeah, I mean, look, everybody's got dreams. I remember the monkey who's in the hangover who then was on that NBC show. He started in porn, right? Do you know that there are several animals on IMDB that have multiple credits?

Like you can click on the animal and see what other stuff they've been in. I didn't know that, I was like, it's absolutely true. You would know that, obviously, because you're in the business. Like you can click on a dog in one movie and I'm sure the other movies,

I found that out this way. Do you ever get a famous animal to be at a porn? Like you know, when you get some like old washed up actress, you know, who finally starts doing porn at 50 or whatever. There is a humpback whale. Oh. Which as you know we're endangered until recently. What happened recently?

Were you the cause? Well this humpback whale is a celebrity. Oh. Every video we put this whale in 15, 16 more whales would come out of those viewing sessions. It was incredible. So that, I mean, that's worth it. That's, that's the goal of all pornography. Human or animal, isn't it?

Like the more babies you can get out of it. Yeah, that's more successful there. Pornography is for procreation. So that, that whales up is, I would say, is the pinnacle of the industry right now. Did you direct that one? I know, but I was on set. Oh really? I was outside the tank, but I was oh yeah, I was gonna say you'd be dead. I feel like that is that you know water makes light refractor. Yes. So what's so good about our Miss Sauceridory? Why does everybody love this while sensuality? Oh, wow.

This is a whale. Sensual whale. Loans. Oh, almost cross the interspecies boundaries. So it's getting even other species horny? Yeah, yeah, we had a paired giraffe down in San Diego who would not fuck. And we showed it a whale video and they fucked. It was great. And how did you asks fuck is it with their necks?

What they so they they wrap their necks around each other. Well, no, no, drafts facing opposite directions and then reverse back it back into each other. The neck otherwise gets in the way. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I figured. Yeah. You see that spotless giraffe recently? No. Yeah. that's gorgeous. It was it was clean. Yeah that that giraffe is a Success story. Oh, one of your stories is one of mine. What were they watching that got them? What were their parents watching the parents were the parents were watching classic giraffe pornography Classic classic 70s.

Yeah. Oh, no, this was some of the stuff we shot with film. All right. Here's my big question. After they watched the porn, after they have sex, what are they mostly watched then to go to sleep? Seinfeld. Did you just say Seinfeld?

I guess it. Is it like giraffe Seinfeld? So, okay. Like after a stop time. We have the rights to those scripts. Okay, I know what you're, what you're hinting at here. I'm saying remake it. We have shot episodes of MASH, taxi,

and, uh, and, uh, and, and Seinfeld, early Seinfeld went, because there's a, the Seinfeld Chronicles. Yeah, the, the, the, when George is in real estate. Yeah, the early, the early, the mean like when George is in real estate. Yeah, the early early sure it beggars belief by season four cheers cheers before Diane we have we've reached four. Yeah, before Diane, so that like 50. I remember the pilot where she comes. Yeah, so it's the 15 minutes before she comes in where Carlos just being sarcastic. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that cold open with Sam. But we yeah, we so we've reshot a lot of that with animals so that the animals have something to do to wind down

Yeah, yeah, there's 30 rock episodes, huh 30 rock episodes to new There is so you know, there's a different law for public domain if you are reshooting footage with animals They start writing into contracts in the mid-90s? You can do anything you want, almost. Yeah, like, so the cutoff currently is 20, 23 right now. Yeah. So the cutoff right now is the mid-half of 1997. So we can use anything prior. Anything free that and reshooted with animals.

So you can finally use the single guy. Yeah, or you can do a little play out of ma'am and George from Webster Maybe only one season of Veronica's closet. Yeah, I think Buffy we can use Maybe like Animals love game shows they love to wind down with game shows. We got that one with the whammy's oh Press you like what about the bad breakers? Yeah, I don't know what the bad oh Brian Cranston hosted that it was a game show. Oh the bad breakers? Uh, the bet. Yeah, I don't know what that was. The bad, oh, Brian Cranston hosted that. It was a game show.

Oh, the bad breakers. Yeah, it was about making Crystal meth, yeah. You guys were talking about that earlier. You know, I will say we cannot produce any pornography with birds because of the meth situation, how meth is inside the bird. Yeah, yeah, that's tough. The DEA would be against that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And those guys are always trying to shut us bird. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's tough. The DEA would be against that.

Yeah, yeah. And those guys are always trying to shut us down, trying to find a loophole. The DEA, you're really? Do you feel like this is what you've always wanted to make? Or are you trying to, again, use this as a springboard to make to making human more and more humans? For you, look, I don't want to get emotional here. Uh-oh, but you are though, yeah. But this was a crime.

And I am so grateful. Did you call it a wet dream? I mean, the first time it happened, yeah, it was a wet dream. I thought, there's no way anybody is ever going to believe in this. Nobody's ever going to let me do what I saw. You were like a guy in here. Are you the only person doing this? Well, now there's a whole industry.

Wow. But I walked into the L.A. Zoo and I said, guys, a guy in here. Are you the only person doing this? Well, now there's a whole industry. Wow. But I walked I walked into the LA zoo and I said guys I can fix it. I can fix it. Do they know what you were talking about? No, not I have to explain. Yeah, because I imagine if anyone walked in here and said I can fix it. I was sure I know something's wrong. But what specifically explain what's wrong? Yeah, but you should have started with that. Yeah, go ahead. I told them, and I told them what I wanted to do. They laughed me out.

I don't know. Like literally, they laughed until you left. Yeah, they laughed. I didn't know that's what they needed me to do. So I stayed to close. Yeah, I would have met. So they're just saying they're laughing right in your face. And at some point the laughs become artificial,

and you're like, all right, what are we doing here? Yeah yeah, but then it closes and you leave. And they're like, great. Finally, that's what we were trying to get you to get. So I went home that night and I shot a proof of concept sort of a wheel with with what? What? Yeah, what did you shoot that? Well, I had two dogs. So these are not endangered, but you just found two horny dogs. Scott, she ever used what she had, man. Sure. Well, it's, yeah, it's on spec. Yeah, it was on spec. Yeah. And I brought that video back. And look at this video I shot of two dogs, fucking, was it different people to who were working there that day?

It's surprisingly a lot of people have worked every day of the week. Okay. So it was the same people. So they knew why you were showing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And once they saw it, they were like, you want us to show this to the lions? And I was like, why don't we see what happens? And I will not lie.

It was lions fuck that day. Wow. Just from watching two dogs. That's right, yeah. And they tried to show it, Yeah, it's so anyway, that's it was so the other thing you're telling us is porn works. It does four animals and people. But you have to be an animal or a person and hey, this is humanity and the animal kingdoms podcast. So you're on the perfect podcast. I'm really happy. It's really important that we get

the word out and Kate, because there's some markets we haven't been able to, like, like, there's bias against it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. A lot of people will find, like, well, the religious zoos. Oh, religious zoos. Yeah, in like the Midwest and the Bible belt,

they do not want to show pornography to their animals. And those animals are dying as a result. Right, I hate those zoos. They're all like every cage is religious themed. Yeah, you know, yeah, there's like the the the the the e-sau room where They have that goat that they were pretending the beard was Yeah, that's classic go on all those religious They're like hey word Noah's Ark and come on in that that's a better example They're like, hey, where Noah's are? Come on in.

That's a better example. Same Frances FSCC. I've gathered all these animals for a hot orgy. Things like that. Have you done a same Frances FSCC orgy porn video? You know what? It's an excellent video. There's probably recurring themes.

Yeah, we could use that as sort of the intro sketch before the actual sex happens. That would be great. As Bob was saying, the story is important. We've been so desensitized by hardcore pornography that's all about hitting skins. We need the story. We need sensuality.

See, I'm the opposite. I think like, now there's too much story in porn. Where I'm like, you know what I, like when they say, what type of porn do you like? I go, I like people having sex. Like, that's all I need. Well, no wonder you've passed it over a door size hand-tie pile to us.

Shh. It's a little taller than Gorf. Okay. But not just all his dorf, you're right. Scott, I heard you bought the bang bus. Ha, ha, ha. It's true, confirmed or denied. Take a look outside the window, my friend.

Wow, there's the bang bus. Is that true, Scott? I heard you have a thing with bind, everything from movies that has to do with that? You've got a pussy wagon, the main bus, like all the things from movies with a pre-slightening because it's a real pussy wagon. Exactly. Any vehicle in any movie that one can presume was in the movie in order to lure someone from the opposite sex. Oh, man, you have a problem with this dude. So, uh, tell me, uh, you're fine where you're at. You don't need LinkedIn in order to, uh, hook up with any kind of other animal pornographer

or so you're... You know, I don't, I, maybe you can answer a question here. I have never signed up for LinkedIn as, to my knowledge, there's nobody in the industry who's on, so how do they get my knowledge, there's nobody in the industry who's on. So how do they get my email in order to send me the initial emails that are like, you should sign up for Lincoln. We'll find you online. Let me open my laptop. I'm signing in to LinkedIn.com. There we go. I'm putting in animal pornography in the Boolean search. I'm getting so many hits. I'm showing you the laptop. You're seeing all these business professionals wait

There's like 15 That there's like 15 spoof accounts of my name right there on LinkedIn. How do there's no verification? Brasa. There's a three factor authentication process. Yeah, but somebody's using three factor authentication process in order to sign into these fake accounts Well, we're beta testing it soon Soon we'll get to four factor authentication. What can you tell me what? So cell phone, cell phone, email. We send you a pin to one of those. And then I call you and I say, is it really you?

What's the third factor? The one I just said. But I think we'll add a fourth where I call back again and say, come on, really? By the way, I am reading authentication is a word. Wow. But not the not in two fact authentication comes up first, but authentication is a word.

You found a way to make us both look bad. What? Hey, I want to own it because the one thing when an episode comes out, I love it when the corrections come in. People start saying, no, you said this, but you were wrong, so I just wanna get out ahead of it. Authentification is actually a word, the process of making or establishing as authentic.

Hi, Tom. Synonyms authentication. Tom, Scott's actor like a role mother, Pika, any? Absolutely, seems like you've adopted some of the passive aggression that I brought into this recording. This is all aggression. This is not me being passive about it, right, Bob? You've seen me being, I'm ideeing it, right?

It's clear. You've seen me being passive aggressive and aggressive. This is aggression. Yeah, exactly. But he's, Tom is a master of passive aggression. And it's what makes him such a great corporate exec. You know, it's being a aggression, do any of the animals ever like halfway through the porn just get really angry and start attacking the other animal?

Or eating them? Uh, we thankfully have not had any, any episodes where the animals will attack each other. They have attacked the crew. Okay. I think maybe there was a moment once with a platypus, we were shooting a shot with two platypives, and I think they got so annoyed that they forgot the cameras were there,

and then they realized they were being filmed, they attacked that both the cameraman and our sound guy. I've seen that in human porn too. Yeah. They forget that they human porn too. Yeah. They forget that the camera, then they go, oh, the light goes out of their eyes as they're getting into it and trying to make their eggs. And then.

Are you doing Minascha tois and three sons and stuff like that too, or are they just too endangered? You know, there's been a lot of discussion. The panda is a hard animal to crack. Yeah. We've done, you know, the stories we've done a period piece, like, oh, we're in medieval times. Bridgerton's parodies. Nothing works.

Nothing works. So we thought maybe we're going to have to bring in like multiple pandas in a shoot and see if we can cross that threshold. Right. Yeah. I tell you, this might be for bad, and to ask, but have you ever created some hybrids? Yeah, like a half panda, half emperor penguin, and impopanda, impanata.

So the white grind-over-dio that I was relating to you guys earlier did result in a pregnancy. And it was brought to term. This was like a human white rhino. Hybrids. No. Wait, so a human actually you've been the white rhino?

The other way around, but yeah. Oh, oh, wait, so a woman got pregnant? Ouch. Very good. Hold on a second. A woman, woman brought a half human, have white right now to germ. Oh, do you know this woman? I know the woman.

Yeah, it's my mom. So she brought either half white right now, half human, half sibling. Oh, is this how you got interested in animal pornography? No, I was shooting. This was like shooting. I was shooting. You're shooting your mom with a white radio. No, she was in a costume.

Go down. Like, I'm not. I'm not. I wouldn't put my mom in danger on purpose. Like, uh, but, uh, but did you not know that the white rhino was a male? Again, I, I, you take what you can get. The white rhino is a male. My mother is a is a female But she's inside of the costume which was one of those inflatable things Sure, and you thought for no there's no way not gonna be I'm risking yeah, yeah, the white rhinos have an incredibly small pain Yes, so it was not painful to my mother. Yeah, she didn't even know that it happened and then suddenly she's pregnant suddenly She's pregnant Nine months later, you know we got this weird. I would call it looks demonic You know, it's it's airless

Long snout sort of like horned. What do you call that? Which one is it be Bob or rock steady? Oh? Why are you looking at me be back? Because she knows you love to do business. Yeah, okay. I may have a podcast about this. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, socated. Oh, so it wasn't nine months? Yeah, I mean, nine months later, we're looking at it. Oh, yeah, but it was born five months earlier than that. So it cuts you four months after it's born. You're finally looking at it. Well, all of us were scared.

We kept it under the sheet. I wouldn't want to look at that. We slept food underneath. We're scared of it. How was the pregnancy? Did your mother get an epidural? She went, that's the drugs, right? Yes. Yes, she went full drugs. Good. Uh, and also the, hospital staff demanded to be blindfolded. So nobody has seen it for five months until we've pulled the sheet off and, you know, okay, there it is. Uh, it goes through It goes through childhood adolescence very rapidly.

Oh, okay, so how old is, is, So it is now older than me. Oh, I should say, in rhinosis. I should say Stephen is older than me. In right, right. And works at the pentagon. Oh, okay, that's a good job. Yeah, that's an excellent, excellent job.

Okay, and that must be the half human part that's sentient, I guess, is it? Well, I mean, the... It's, it's, Steven is sentient, yeah. Okay, so the rhinos are sentient, but they can't express language usually. Well, yeah, no, Steven can talk. Okay. It's hard to understand. The mouth shape is different.

Oh, yeah, yeah. The vocal chords are different, but yeah, you work at the Pentagon. Well, that's a beautiful story, then. It has a happy ending. You have a wonderful family. The funny thing is, wait, ending. You have a wonderful family. Wait, what? Uh, you have a wonderful family.

I, but why was, how is that related? Well, you have a brother. Have a brother? Yeah, I thought you meant like you're talking about like my, my, my home life, but no, no. I can ask about your home life. I don't want to talk about that. Why? What's going on here?

Now I want to know what's going on your home life. Nothing, nothing. Oh, man. No, it's going on here? Now I want to know what's going on here. Nothing. Nothing. Oh, man. It's going on. Why? I'm going through a divorce. Oh, no, telly. Oh, tell us about this.

I'm sorry. I lied about my job before. What? I lied about my job. You're not an animal photographer? No, no, no, I lied to her about my job. Oh, okay. And kept it sort of on the DL and one day I come home

and she's on the couch and the video's all over the living room. Yeah, she's like, what is this? What have you done? Why are you filming this? Why? You're filming the very upset. So yeah, I'm going through a bit of a divorce. I'm sorry, Joe.

It's all right. Wasn't she grateful for the things that provided her a house, a car, car alive? You know you sound like you were in the room because I did shout that So you see being upset at very nicely. Yeah, yeah, you shouting it might be I shouted that at her She was not and she was like don't talk to me like that And I was like what about the animal kingdom aren't you grateful for the work we've done like the awards we've won? Did she say anything like have fun, you know filming all your animal jack-off material?

That's what she shouted at me right right and then she She got a you should threw together a bag of clothes and left Are you worried that animals are gonna watch what you do and just jack off and not actually have sex great question Scott Yeah, yeah a little bit because it would destroy the business Mock if you really have to It's you have to if they start you know jerk because animals do mastermates, especially dolphins. Oh, yeah They also are the only animal that commit suicide. That's dark. Maybe you should cut it from the show. I think we'll keep it in. All right, great. But yeah, some animals do master bait. And when you see that starting, you shut off the video,

and you're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, maybe shock them a lot like the LinkedIn employees. Absolutely. You put them on the payroll and shock them into oblivion. employees. Absolutely. He put them on the payroll and shock them into oblivion. Yeah. You should consider instead of, look, you guys should switch jobs is what I think. I mean, like, I'm for a day at least. Look at me, I'm built for pornography. You're, you wouldn't have to start. Dairy Jacked. You are, yeah, you aren't a huge. My nickname in high school was white, right? No. I wondered if we were ever going to bring this up about time

because he wore a large shirt like he says, but. It was three times too big, but you're already a giant. There are so many muscles on you. Yeah, absolutely. And similar to the animal, a tiny penis. You will not feel it. Okay, okay. You won't feel it, Scott.

All right. Scott, you won't feel it. I don't even want you to build Clinton me, by the way. Don't feel it Scott. All right, Scott. You won't feel it. I don't even I don't want you to build Clinton me by the way Don't bring it around here. They called me Bill Clinton for all the head. I got Well, look next time I think tell you should be honest with your partner about Yeah, I've learned that lesson right up top. Yeah immediately. Yeah, I mean, no date. Don't make it like a fake profile on Bumble all the way till you could wait till third day Maybe they think so well, I don't know what what you do for a living does tend to come up

I think I think right out of the gate. I make animal pornography. Hi. How are you doing? Then like a hug? I think well, I don't know you can wait until you sit down Maybe until apps come so I stand up and hug that which so you want me to sit down start with Get up then say I make animal That way so you want me to sit down start with Get up then say I make amable But I would upset anybody start. Always preface it with you want to hear something funny Yeah, that's quite that's pretty good That's a chart that you're a bit of a charmer there. I should start doing that on this show start the show with you want to hear something funny

Welcome to comedy bang bang should be the slogan on the last head. Oh, this is a good slogan. Look, I'm tired of humanity's podcast in the animal. You want to hear something funny? Comedy Bang Bang. I love it. I love it. It's no hand tie. No hand tie.

Comedy Bang Bang. It's no hand tie. It's not as good as hand tie, but hey. All right, well, good luck to you, Tully. I'm so sorry that you are going through that at home. Everything else is good. And I got to say, thanks for doing the Lord's work. Yeah, thank you, Tully. I'm so sorry that you are going through that at home. Everything else is there. And I got to say, thanks for doing the Lord's work. Yeah. Thank you, Tully.

Bravo. Thank you. I really appreciate it because we need more animals out there. And I'd love to see some of your work. Well, you can have to get into a cage and hide in the... Because we're not going to release it online. Right. I can't get a link. No, I'm not. Okay. This spot quit being a quaint, man. He wants to see it live

Yeah, he'd love to see it live Yeah, I just want the I want the bill O'Reilly just fuck it. We'll do it live kind of thing out of it But all right guys, we are running out of time We only have time for one final feature on the show. That is a little something called plug Z This is a time to say what you will Gzzz. This is in time to say what you will. It's plug-y, plug, plug, plug, time.

And I hope that you pay enough to know good. You're a naughty, naughty, naughty, bad boy. And I want to hear you're naughty, naughty, naughty, bad, applause. Oh, thank you so much. That was naughtyty bad boy by Tanner Willem Hale. Thank you so much to Tanner. All right, what do we plug in? Bob, obviously the book is called Zillett, another important rhyme. It's out this week. This is the important week to buy it because then it shoots. Is there a children's book list on the best cell?

Oh, I believe there is. Yes. Okay. Yeah. How high do you believe you're going to get up to somewhere? Okay. You'll be on the list. I predict. Yeah. I hope. Yeah. Okay. No, that's just a hope. It comes out this week and people can get it. But everything else that I might talk about, I can't talk about because we're still. We're recording this and the strike is still happening that may not be the case by the time it is released. We don't know, but we can't talk about the third. The second spin off, but the third show

in the Breaking Bad Universe is actually a fun thing that I really wish I could talk about. Oh, really? Yeah, but I can't. Okay. I'll try to, when you tweet this out, if this is done, I'll tweet you'll say what it is Okay, tweet up my other project. All right

Okay, bean dip anything you want to plug here. Yeah, so Scott. I would love for people to go to you hotel Thank you ball for during the day song W hotel Please come on down to the W Hotel and we will give you a free meal. A free meal? Yes. Anyone who comes down can get a free meal. Anyone who comes down can get a free meal. This is a great deal. Free meal if they can find me in my dress. Then if you do say, ma'am could I jake you two a meal and then you get a free meal. Wait this sounds like you're just looking for lunch companions.

Scott, give me a bite. I got so many levels off time to get rid of all of them. Who have you been dating recently? Oh, don't get me started doing back with Charlize. Charlize Theron is back with you? Yeah, she is dropping me nuts, dude. Really, what's going on with you and Charlize? She's a handful or two.

She's a handful. She just like, constantly wants to have fun. She's a handful or two. She's a handful. She just like constantly wants to have fun. She's great. Well, it's great. But then you get exhausted. She constantly wants to read like historical fiction and then discuss it. It's just like constant. Sometimes I'm like, I need to go for a walk around myself. Yeah. I need to go to the zoo in quotes. Yeah. I need to go to the zoo. Yeah. Well, I need to go to the zoo. Yeah, well speaking of the zoo Telly, what do you want to plug? Do you have a plug here? I we're we've just started releasing the music from the videos on

Compact disc and streaming so if you want to check out any of who does the music? We got a professional musician oh Danny Yolfman does the music. Danny Yulfman is doing all the Music for all of the animal porn animal. Yes, all of our animal porn on his produced by Danny Yulfman Not under the Not under the umbrella of Oingo boy go, but he has a solo artist. Yeah, like he does all of his music soundtracks You can check that you can check that out on Spotify, Apple Music, etc. What do you enter into the search bar? Well, the animal, so if you want to white rhino and then Danny Elfman, you'll probably

get that album. Okay. But yeah, just look up any of the animals by name. By name. The videos don't have names, because the animals don't appreciate that. Oh right So they're not they're not they're looking at metadata or anything like that. They're they're just they're they're there for the port Yeah, the with a title sequence with this orientum, so we just they don't know English right away right? Yeah, okay, so they like a little mood music in order to help them out

Absolutely, and Danny is great. I mean, like the guys got range. I don't know if you've seen it anyway. So yeah, check that out. Danny Elfman's animal pornography soundtracks. Okay, great. And Tom Borman, what are we plugging here? Obviously, LinkedIn. I already know.

I've usually linkedin.com, but I'm excited to plug probably my favorite thing from today's recording. Oh, what's that? When Tally was getting vulnerable, talking about her ex divorce and heartbreak, and Scott interrupted it rudely and said, yeah, yeah, yeah, do the animals just masturbate sometimes to the videos? I felt like that we had covered everything. And I wanted to hear about the animals that they did.

You wanted to cover it even more. Yeah. I get it. I get it. Hey, stop joking me in forcing this hand tie in my face. Okay. I'm out of here. Tom, thank you for ending your own plugs. And I'll thank you to never come back on the show. But you said that to me before. I want to plug. There's some great stuff there at CBB World. We have some great shows out there. We have the neighborhood listen. That is a big new show that is coming over to CBB World. What is that Scott? That is two wonderful comedians and two do I know them you do and it's burnt millipede me a p-day sorry yeah we'll talk about it afterwards but neighborhood listen is

there there's a great show hey Randy our old friend Randy Snuts who's decidedly nicer to me than Tom Borman is when he's on the show. So many great shows over there. Head over to CBBWorld.com and check it out and subscribe. And if you subscribe for a year, you get two months free. All right, let's close up the old plug bag. Go. Go.

Open the plug bag. Everybody loves it. Open the plug bag, everybody loves it Nobody's the blood of bag, everybody loves it So come feelin' realin' down, if the root is right You gotta go bring the stuff, throw it back When you wanna make everybody's free, you gotta go bring the stuff Throw it back, throw it back, throw it back And put it up, the blood of bag, it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it, pop it, pop it up, pop it, pop it up, pop it, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it up, pop it, pop it, pop, pop it, pop, pop it up, pop it, pop it pop, pop, pop it pop, pop, pop, pop it, pop it pop, pop it up, pop it up, pop it, pop, pop it, pop, Keep going. Keep going. I can't even edit.

I'm gonna fall in love with you. I'm gonna fall in love with you. I'm gonna fall in love with you. I'm gonna fall in love with you. Get your pants together. Get your pants together. I'm gonna fall in love with you. Bob, it did surprise you to learn that was only a little over 60 seconds long.

Yeah, very much. That was Close Plugular Spectacular by Skate Tricks. Thank you so much to Skate Tricks. If you have any plugs, themes go to cvbworld.com slash plugs. And Bob, I want to thank you so much. Always great. Thanks, buddy. To see you, really love the book.

And I hope to see you sequel and maybe even a trilogy. Yeah, a great idea. Yeah, great being here. All right, and you know, obviously Bean Dip, so good to see you. Bean Dip. So great to see you guys. So great to meet you.

What a nice time and it really a pleasure of a time. Yeah, and Tom Boreman, you start sobbing again. Do you think that this was not a successful appearance? Why are you crying so much? You're choking me still and holy the hand tie in front of my face. I just wanted to leave. Okay, sorry, but you got to wait till the end of the show

and tell you, Shirkudere. Yeah, Shirkudere. Shirkudere. Shirkudere. Thanks for what you're doing. Thank you, Bob. Thank you. Yeah, why have you brought your camera out?

Why do you have your camera here? To selfie. To selfie. Oh, OK, you don't want to film any of us. I mean, if any of you have endangered relatives, we could shoot a spot and see if we can help. Honestly, yes, my relatives are endangered in a sense of, but not as human beings are not endangered, not the species.

Well, OK, so when you are would you just being I've older parents? Yes, if you want your parents your older parents, I don't think watching porn is gonna cure that for them If you think your parents watching you fuck is gonna have help them have another kid then I'll shoot you But I'll try it, but I don't all right, we'll see you next time. Thanks, bye.