Comedy Bang Bang: The Podcast - Ellie Kemper, Matt Apodaca, Jacob Wysocki, Hannah Pilkes

Episode Date: August 14, 2023

Actor and comedian Ellie Kemper joins Scott to talk about her new podcast "Born To Love", her famous high school acting teacher, and learning how to type. Then, exotic snake breeders Ronnie & Gunk Li...ttle stop by to talk about making snakes fall in love. Plus, local brewer Brett drops in to talk about his brewery with the most wheels and to help select craft beers for the group. Listen to Ellie's podcast "Born To Love" here: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/1119-born-to-love-with-ellie-k-116602810/Listen to "Earwolf Presents: Expo Exposé" here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/earwolf-presents/id455614522

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 🎵 Come and see my car. Come and see my car. Dating me is a lot like dating a banana. No, sorry, I messed that up. Dating me is a lot like buying a banana. Boy, can you imagine dating a banana? That's the dream for half of the population. There is a really short window of time where I'm in a good and it closed before you took me home.
Starting point is 00:00:41 Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang. Very good. I got through that. Thank you to Shaggy Wilcox for that catchphrase of mission. And welcome to Comedy Bang Bang for another edition. That's right, week three of our strike episodes. Yes, we're on strike and we are scraping the bottom of the barrel for guests.
Starting point is 00:01:01 Ah, boy, I tell you, we're reaching out to authors, musicians, and today we have a podcast host. Oh my god. Coming up a little later on the show, we have a couple of exotic snake breeders. Oh boy. And we also have a local brewer. What has happened to this? Well, it's strike. Hey, it's good for a strike right? But let's get to our podcast toast before
Starting point is 00:01:28 We Terry too much further. I cannot mention where you might know her from You've you've seen her. I'll tell you that much maybe maybe yeah, if you're lucky Either in the wild, but I can't talk about any of her projects that you've seen her on I can I can I believe strike rules allow me to sort of vaguely talk about them and around about way. She was on a show that was set in an office. I, I think that's okay. I think so.
Starting point is 00:01:55 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. But she has a, what's important today and why she's here. It's not to talk about all that struck work. Even though we love it and that's why we love her and that's maybe why we're even going to tune into our podcast. Maybe. You know, I mean, unless you know, we're personally like I do. And then, and then I was, I was first to sign up, wasn't I?
Starting point is 00:02:16 You were the very first one and I was so grateful to you, Scott. Thank you. Her podcast, Born to Love, is on I Heart Media, through Will Ferrell's big money players. It's out now, please welcome Ellie Kimper. Yay! Hi, thank you so much for having me today. It is my pleasure during a strike. Well, I appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:02:39 And I'll be honest, I of course, want to fair contract for everyone. I was, I would, I know the strike was gonna be a long sort of slog, but I knew also one thing. Yeah, I could be on your show. Finally, finally, finally, I allowed you. You've been Emailing me every week. Well wanting to get on. I was like a podcast host. No, thank you. It just was hoping. I mean, maybe if you were still on the No, I can't even talk about it. It was a workplace set. It was a show and a workplace setting. It was a workplace setting.
Starting point is 00:03:05 It was a show and a workplace setting. It was a workplace. Yeah, it was four walls and computers. No cots. No. No, it was a mirror. It's not like an army barracks, which is a workplace setting. This was more, oh gosh, things you write on, things you use to, but when you print documents.
Starting point is 00:03:25 Exactly, a computer's legal pads. Yeah. A Dwight Shrewd, stuff like that. What are you saying? We say it. Welcome, Ellie. It's great to have you. Is this your first time on the podcast part of it?
Starting point is 00:03:39 No, on the podcast part of it. Because you were, of course you were on the television. Yeah, I can't see you saying that. Oh, I'm on the show. I'm sure even say that. I'm sure that we saw. I'm sure that we saw. The ones and zeros. So, can't you, we can still talk about ones and zeros, right? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:03:54 I don't know. Well, it's wonderful to see you again. You're one of my favorites. And on that thing that I can't talk about, you're one of the best guests of all time. And when I say all time, I mean, the five years I did that show. I can't talk about. One of the best guests of all time. And when I say all time, I mean, the five years I did that show. Of course.
Starting point is 00:04:08 Of course. Of course. Of course. Of course. I clearly remember that afternoon taping. Isn't that strange? I mean, I just, I remember the location. I remember it was hot.
Starting point is 00:04:17 It was in good day. It was in good day. Yeah. Yeah. It was, how long ago was it now? What do you know it was well ago? You were on season three, I believe. Of something. Of whatever it was. Yeah. And so you were on season three, I believe. Of something.
Starting point is 00:04:25 Of whatever it was. And so that must have been. Oh my gosh, that's like 2012. 2012, 13. Oh, around there. Yeah. Yeah, it's been. If you do the math, yeah, you'll.
Starting point is 00:04:35 And I refuse to. I know, but I'll do it for you. What if math were on strike? Oh my god. Well, that night not be bad. Yeah. Well, what would we do? Nightmare might be bad.
Starting point is 00:04:44 No, not be bad. Because also Well, what would we do? Not be bad. No, not be bad. Because also who's my mic's are working. Yeah, no, no, that is a good point because like, did you take typing class when you're young? What? Now madman comes up again. No, I was so I just might my worst nightmare. I was so worried about mentioning the TV show Mad Man.
Starting point is 00:05:05 Now I have. And I've just gotten it out and there. I'm watching it right now. The original Mad Man himself. John Hamm was your acting teacher. Was he not? Yep. Fun trivia.
Starting point is 00:05:15 When you were in high school, is that right? Yes. Can we mention high school? Yes. When I was in high school. And he went to my high school. He went to, yeah. You're of course from Kansas City.
Starting point is 00:05:23 This was in St. Louis, right? This is in St. Louis. He and I attended the same high school. He's older than I am. He's, so he went to college, came back and taught theater for a year. Very nice guy. Was his advice, just be handsome, and you'll eventually get cast on something.
Starting point is 00:05:36 He, yeah. That was a, that was a huge honor. That was the big honor. That, that, that, that people will photograph in paparazzi photos. No. No. No.
Starting point is 00:05:48 Was he a good teacher? He was a great teacher. And I'm always, I always want to mention that first because of course people, he's a handsome man. He's an exquisite actor. He's also a very good teacher. He taught me the improv section of our class. Oh really?
Starting point is 00:06:03 How interesting. So what? Like, he steps up. He's Zips up, Yes, and more Zips up. Yeah, so that's incredible. When he walked in, did suddenly like every, you know, every woman and some men in the class just start hearing hot for tea tour by Van Halen just day or day or day or day or day or day or day or day or day or day or day or day or day or day. He came on playing that on the boot. Yeah, that's just fun imagining it. Yeah, that's just so trademark him. Right.
Starting point is 00:06:30 No, yeah. So, so yeah, I didn't take typing class. You did not take typing class. Why not? Why don't know what? Why would I take? Okay, all right. Okay, I was seeing.
Starting point is 00:06:39 Because you learned how to type? Well, okay, when you asked the question, I was imagining a secretarial school, to be honest, because I told you I'm re-watching a show. Right, right, right. Something a story about a- About a- Secretaries.
Starting point is 00:06:52 A male person who is very angry all the time. And isn't in fact who he says he is. That's right. And has secretaries in the office. And he constantly drapes things. Yeah, always, always. And he don's clothing. Yep. Deco. I was trying to think about what's oh crack the code. Cracked the code. Yes. What decode also
Starting point is 00:07:13 be cracked the code. Yeah. I think crack the code is probably slang for decoding. For decoding. So I went formal first. Yeah. Decode. I did take keywords in fourth grade. What is that? It's a computer program with like a tiger. So computers were, okay, see, I have, you're a bit younger than me. Computers were not invented. Well, I mean, they were invented, I'm sure, but, because how else would we get to the moon? Oh, wait, no, because of the hidden figure. No, I can't even talk about them. Those wonderful ladies.. No, they're never happy. They're going to be erased from history. We can't honor them any longer. But I took it and it's the it is the class I use most to this day.
Starting point is 00:08:00 It's just learned because now everyone has to type on computers. But I wonder like what what do people do now? How do they learn how to type now? I want to know what was how did you learn how to type you It was yeah, oh, well, one I should say one one goes into class and This was eighth grade for me, okay, and you do drills, which is basically like You know on the keyboard. It's learning where everything is on the keyboard, instinctually, so it's like, you type out, A, S, D, F, G, H, J, K, L, semi-colon. You know, you do that over and over and over
Starting point is 00:08:33 and over to get your fingers like used to going with it. Okay, now I'm realizing I am gonna come in pretty quick with a brag, which is this. They did offer such a class when I was in seventh grade. Okay. I tested out of it. Oh, because you get already. Because of keywords.
Starting point is 00:08:49 I explain what keywords is. If there's a tiger, say it more, I've got it. If I, it may not have been a tiger, it was an animated animal, and he guided you through the keyboard. And you, I've been in a life. An animated animal and he guided you through the keyboard and you This is in real life an animated animal comes into class well On on through the screen I see and we had a computer lab I went to Conway school in St. Louis and I just remember Like maybe actually maybe I was Smarter than the average student. I would think you are I mean I am
Starting point is 00:09:21 Yeah, but yeah, you are now you're smarter than the average fourth grader now. No question. I told you I was bragging. Although I wonder if could you do that? Are you smarter than a fifth grader's show? Absolutely. I can't talk about it. Oh shoot.
Starting point is 00:09:37 No, like a home game version. But like a home game version. A home game version. I absolutely would. Is there a fifth grader around Snowflake? Yeah. I could you? I would do a question. Here's my theory.
Starting point is 00:09:46 I think that they ask questions that are only for like the smartest fifth graders in the world. 100%. Just to embarrassed people. I think it's mean. I think it's mean. I think it should be struck against. That's the only thing where the AMPTP were to say like we have it deal.
Starting point is 00:10:02 I'd say let's still strike that. Yeah. Because it is, you know what? I don't have a sample question in mind. I haven't seen a set this story, this show, but I would imagine that I would get no answers right, would feel horrible. And it's because they've selected the very brightest. The smartest kids and then they hit them with these questions that are like what are the types of clouds cumulon Nimbus or what you know all that shit that like how I don't even want to know that now how did you but it's there in the somewhere I don't think I said it right no but you did you name names I do a few cross words here in there all right now it comes out there there is I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying.
Starting point is 00:10:45 I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying.
Starting point is 00:10:53 I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying.
Starting point is 00:11:01 I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm not saying. I'm on anymore. I don't think you know what? I didn't know it was a show. I thought it was just a show. You're just going along with it. Well, wasn't a show. How long was the show? And this is John Hamza improv training.
Starting point is 00:11:10 Just say yes to everything. And he's used that when he, in terms of commercials, say yes to everything. Yeah. Now, you have a podcast, Ellie. It's called Born to Love. And you, with the minute I heard about this, I was like, a celebrity with a podcast.
Starting point is 00:11:31 This is something new. What did you, did your ears? Did you just perk right up? I was just like, okay. Now she's walking my side of the street. That's exact. I had this idea. It came to me in a dream.
Starting point is 00:11:41 And the, well, I was just, what can you, I've got it. Podcast. Now, did you even know what one was? Or did you just imagine like your voice going into people's ears? The second one. I just imagined it. And I called my friend. I have a, another friend named Scott. He goes with me, but I called him and I said, you know, I don't know in what medium. How am I going to get our voices into people's ears? Exactly. Do I go around to house to house and talk to them? Right.
Starting point is 00:12:09 Do I? Do I take an empty paper towel roll and shout? I wasn't sure how to amplify how to get. He had heard of podcasts. He'd heard of one podcast. Yes. Was it Conan? No, it was this podcast.
Starting point is 00:12:21 It was this one. Wow. And he said, you know, they do this. And I can listen to it every week. And I said, you know, they do this and I can listen to it every week. And I said, well, we could do what is it called? And he said a podcast, Eli, a podcast. I said, well, let's do it together and start having guests on. And so that's how it started.
Starting point is 00:12:36 Incredible. That is what a story. Well, it is iconic. Yeah, it truly is. Yeah. So thanks. That's incredible. Now, now what, I mean, a lot of celebrities have podcasts
Starting point is 00:12:46 in this is what they do. They go like, here's my podcast idea. I'm gonna talk to another celebrity. Oh. What do you guys do? That's your exactly right. And I didn't end listen. No, we love that part.
Starting point is 00:12:58 No, you have a different thing because we're here. We do have a different thing altogether. You're not talking about their career. No, and you're very kindly trying to prompt me to talk about what the premise of the show is, and I'm ready to like rip on all celebrity high-guests, which is not because I like structure, okay, I like parameters. So anyway, our show is called Born to Love, and we don't have people, guests, authors, actors, athletes on to talk about their journey, their project, their
Starting point is 00:13:25 process, none. We invite them to come on and talk about something they love. So it's like hopefully unrelated to what they do for work. Now I would come on and talk about this podcast because it's the thing I love most. What if you came on it? Is there a food you like Scott? No, I usually have MREs. Okay. What's an MRE? It's like army. Oh, okay, all right. Okay, well, do you like this so you don't take this joy?
Starting point is 00:13:55 No, I hate them. Okay, maybe you there's a sport you like or a song. Musician. You don't have to worry. Happy birthday. Well, usually if you hear it, it's good news for you, because presents are a common. Well, that's true. So you could come on and talk about how much you love that song because you think about
Starting point is 00:14:12 presents. And you wish to talk it all about your work. You know, so that's, I think I hope what distinguishes us from other podcasts. And you've had people on like Jennifer Fisher, others. Others. Who else has been on the show? We've had Al Roker on the show. Al Roker.
Starting point is 00:14:28 We've had Justin Long on the show. We are gonna get Michael Lewis on the show, which I'm really excited about. Hopefully, if you have Amber Ruffin and Lisi the more on the show, should I keep going? I mean, sure. No. Can you think of anyone else?
Starting point is 00:14:43 None. Please let me stop. Okay, stop, stop, please. No, we've think of anyone else? None. Please let me stop. Okay, stop, stop, please. No, we've had great guests on the show. How many episodes have you done at this point? I think we've done about, honestly, we've recorded about 25. That's pretty good.
Starting point is 00:14:54 That's half a year at this, if you release weekly. And while we are, and it's a daily show. It's a daily show. It's an hourly show. Can you imagine? No. Hourly. A new episode.
Starting point is 00:15:04 No. I, and we're just constantly, we're just like, we're gonna make it good. We're gonna, you know. And they're 90 minute episodes. I don't know how we're putting them out every hour. We're just doing it. No, I can't imagine that.
Starting point is 00:15:13 Can you imagine? No. Can I talk about this? Self-operas? Yeah. They're still going, so yeah. Let's talk about it. Oh, are they not?
Starting point is 00:15:21 Oh, they are. I have no idea. I guess our lives is still happening. So that's what I'm getting at is is don't they tape those every day? Yeah, I think they tape five in a day It's a lot like doing a game. Oh, I understand I feel like they do five in a day They they try never to do a second take Well, that's that's great. I get yelled at if you if you have to do a second take If you forget your lines right and they encourage you, at least this is through Charles
Starting point is 00:15:45 Groudon's book. Okay. They encourage you if you go up on a line, just make it make sense somehow because they never want to shut down the cameras and like have to reset. Okay, I'm rethinking things now. That sounds like a dream. It sounds good, right?
Starting point is 00:15:58 It sounds great. Yeah, just blazing through it. Just blazing through. I mean, like quicker than I think Steve Harvey does family feud. Oh my gosh. If you can imagine, Gage shows are not struck by the way. Oh, well, so that's confusing to me as well because we can talk about game shows, but we can talk about them, but we can have been on a game show. Oh, yeah, match game with Alec Baldwin. Oh, I mean, not the original map game. I felt that I needed to
Starting point is 00:16:20 clarify which match game now. He never pointed a gun in your direction during that game. No! He did not. Okay, because he's done that on at least one set that I've heard of. Oh, my God. Don't, it's stuck. It's stuck. It's stuck.
Starting point is 00:16:35 We can't talk about it. We can't talk about it. Haven't been on game shows? No, I have always wanted to, and Lauren Lapkiss, she got to do all of them. And I get to do none of them. But I would love to do Batch Game. That was the one and pyramid. Those were the two that I really wanted.
Starting point is 00:16:50 I think I would like pyramid. I'm trying to think of, oh, I'll tell you this. How well you would probably throw, you would like ace this game, which is Jeopardy. Oh, no, I think I would do okay on celebrity Jeopardy, which we've talked to Ike Baron Holtz, who's the current rating champion. And they dumb it down for celebrities. Like I think if I believe he's invited to go up against like the real ones and they're
Starting point is 00:17:16 going to demolish it. Oh, he should not say yes to that. No, I shouldn't. No. Well, I mean, I think it'll be funny to watch. And what I would really like to see is him succeed. You know, sure, but I don't want him to get more projects. Yeah, don't you mean, well, I'll sit here with myself tapes. Just sit here with your self tapes and then and then let him just continue. I don't. Of course. What is it?
Starting point is 00:17:39 I said, ask. You've been off for only so long. You don't even know what it is. I never, never the jerk asked only. What I said, you have to ask them for the job. I have put, isn't this what part of the strike is about the self-tapes? It is, I believe part of it.
Starting point is 00:17:51 Yeah, they want more restrictions on how many self-tapes you have to do. I agree with that. I mean, as opposed to the other points, which you have just like, starchly opposed. I just cannot get behind. OK, I cannot get behind AI restrictions. I always think about AI.
Starting point is 00:18:07 Like, first of all, there's a problem in the messaging because it looks like the word AL. Oh, I couldn't. Every time I see it, I think AL, I just feel sad for Roker. I feel sorry for Weird Al, just like Weird AI. Weird AI, what is going on? But what is it in the font that they can't put the horizontal
Starting point is 00:18:23 to the game acting? And that's the thing. we need to create a font, I think, where like a lowercase L looks different than an uppercase I, right? Well, yes, I would just say make the uppercase, you know what I'm talking about? Do the little cross switch, yeah. Why aren't they doing that?
Starting point is 00:18:38 Or dot them all, like make it. Yes, make a decision, but it looks like L, every time we think it's L, I would love to hear from them And is that being addressed with the AMPT? I that's what that's what I'm going after Now Do you when you do this podcast? Are you having fun with it? Is it something where you were like? Let's try this out because I'm I have some free time and now is it like a passion for you? What do you think? Okay, so I would, I have the same questions for you
Starting point is 00:19:06 because I'm loving it. And I'm new. I'm still a baby in the process. No, don't, no advertising. There's not, I know you can't. I don't know. You said you don't like this. Just McDonald's in general.
Starting point is 00:19:16 Yeah, but I, it's okay. Yeah, no McDonald. I am still in the like honey moonfei. I'm not married to my co-host, but we're still in the honey moonfei. Where I'm well not to say that every buddy gets tired of it, but I'm loving it. Where are you pointing at me? You've been digging it a long time.
Starting point is 00:19:33 So I you know, maybe you're tired. I don't know. You're pointing at your eyes and implying that I bags under eyes. I wasn't. It wasn't. You're missing interpreting the gesture. I wasn't. I was looking at you. I'm talking to you. I appreciate that. Well, there's me. No, I love it because first of all, I am friends with Scott and I've been friends for 20 years. Where do you know this fellow? We went to college together and we were in an improv group together. That's wonderful. We were in our college and prop group together. So I know him from 20 years ago, which tells you how old I am, I'm 43. Why is that it?
Starting point is 00:20:07 Oh, okay. Is that change things? Is that change things? I mean, do you strike? It's okay. Well, to have you on. Is age suspended during the strike? During the strike?
Starting point is 00:20:20 I'll take anything. Yeah. Usually we have, you know, like 25 year old models come through. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll take a 43 year old podcast host during a strike. You're sure? Yeah. You see now why I was so thrilled on July 14th. I mean, I was ambivalent, but part of the feelings worth growth because I knew this would happen. One of the greatest dates since January 6th. Oh, and me both. So you're really loving it and you're having it's an excuse to hang out with your friends as well. Great excuse to hang out with my friend and to me people that you might that no that not that you might that you definitely
Starting point is 00:20:58 would know. Have you had people on that you have never met before? No, yeah it's been mostly friends. But I'm looking forward to the time when we gained some cred. And some rando comes in and it's just like, and it's just like, talk about what you love. Talk now, not with a fucker. I know who we had, sorry, I can't believe this name escaped me in the first like listing of guests. Jumel Buie, who was a column, he was on our show talking
Starting point is 00:21:22 about serial and I, how would I have met him? When you say cereal, I'm either going to go with the world's first podcast or breakfast cereal, which are we talking about? I get the second. Did you know he loves, so he used to have, I think he stopped, but he, well, I should know, I just interviewed him, but he used to have like a,
Starting point is 00:21:39 I don't know what to call. Well, you don't know, I don't know who does. I don't know, well, it's true. He had like a cereal review, cereal a series. Oh, I didn't know who does. You certainly don't know. Well, that's true. He had like a serial review, serial, a series. Oh, was it called serial? It was like, why isn't serial the podcast making breakfast? I don't know. This is like a missed opportunity.
Starting point is 00:21:54 There's a missed out. There's a missed out. Uh-huh. And if you and I were in charge of the serial podcast, I think we'd have like, we'd have sugar likes of something. Yeah, when go to, all the money wouldn't go to NPR either, if you know what I mean. Although if you leave money on the table like around the house, it's good. You like it's fine.
Starting point is 00:22:11 Unless you have a toddler. That's a good point. One they're coins, but if it's dollar bills, then fine. Dollar bills are fine. Well, yeah, past money is dirty. Money's filthy. Don't leave it on your counter. So he talked about like breakfast series.
Starting point is 00:22:24 What's his favorite? Oh my gosh. I know you don't want to spoil it, just get teased out. Really? Um, you want to listen to the episode. Yeah, you will take it from me. Also, wrinkly, I can't remember. It was so long ago and I was stalled.
Starting point is 00:22:39 No, I'm kidding. You were so fucked up. You don't smoke. I'm hot. I don't smoke. So you smoke cigarettes. Hot. I smoke hot. I don't smoke so you smoke cigarettes. I smoke crack. Yeah Cigarettes in crack. Oh wonderful. Two great things to go together now You can get this podcast. I'm assuming anywhere podcasts are distributed
Starting point is 00:22:56 You can you can find it on the iHeart radio app Oh And Will Ferrell big money players he comes to every tap players, he comes to every taping, right? He comes to every taping and he sits like front, I mean, it's not, I'm using front row loosely. Like he just sits in front of me and it's hard to concentrate. It's perfect. I mean, he's will fairly. Right. And he's right there from the office. I mean, I mean, from the office where you take the one show, yes, he, from the office where we, and then he comes into the studio where we take. Yeah, within the office within the office. You have
Starting point is 00:23:28 a studio located within the office. This is a mix. Oh, good. Check out. That was his one credit that he had been on the off and he's well fair. I mean, you know, well, fair. All he was on he was on that show that one show. Yeah, I think he was on that show. Yeah, the the work. Yes, he was definitely. on that show. Yeah, the the work. We show. Yes, he was definitely. He was definitely. But what if that was the only thing? I'm saying what if that, you know, so anyway, he he does. I think he would still be as famous. I think he would do because he's just got it, you know, he's a strong. He will still be talking. Did you see that? I should be in movies. And he said, said no he's turned out everything. I would love that well
Starting point is 00:24:06 I'm born to love is out there right now and look I've enjoyed talking to Ellie for 25 minutes at this point I mean I would love to hear how long your episode but they you know what we usually talk to our guests for about 45 minutes wow all the editors just slap they just cut everything out So it's about it is about 30 minutes Oh, I don't know perfect amount of time for your commute. Yeah for your rush hour drive now They told you you're gonna be here for 90 minutes, right? Yeah, okay. No, I'm Do you think I was gonna cruise group 45? Oh, I've had a few people who about 25 minutes in go like start tapping the old watch
Starting point is 00:24:44 Can I ask you a question? First, I want names, but you won't give them to me. And I'd be rude anyway. During the break, what? During the break, I hope you tell me. But also, why would they not give you the heads up ahead of time if they had some sort of hard apps? I think people assume any interview, or maybe they assume
Starting point is 00:24:58 that they're not interesting enough to be listened to. Let's give them credit and let them be so humble that they think, oh, you couldn't possibly want to tell me. I had to set aside four hours. Oh, thank you. Oh, for the come down as well. No, well, Dan, what yes in my stories. Yes, okay.
Starting point is 00:25:15 By the way, I said 25 minutes, Ellie has been talking for three hours at this point. We have cut it down. So it's a good, but we do have to take a break. When we come back, we have exotic snake breeders. Have you ever owned a snake? Never, but I've never rented one. I have a rented one. Okay, well, we'll talk to them. We also have a local brewer coming up. Big exciting show for strike, you know, during strikes. We'll have more with Ellie Kemper,
Starting point is 00:25:44 more comedy bang bang. We'll have more with Ellie Kemper, more comedy bang bang, we'll be right back after this. Comedy bang bang, we're back. Ellie Kemper is here, born to love is the title of her podcast. You also have a book, I believe. Yeah, we can talk about this. I have a book too. Oh my gosh, we can talk about it.
Starting point is 00:26:03 Yeah, we can talk about books. We write. Yeah, we read it. too. Oh my gosh, let's talk about it. Yeah, we can talk about books. We write. Yeah, we read it. I mean, my friends wrote most of it. I'm a little sure, I got it. You know what I mean? You wrote the whole thing, right?
Starting point is 00:26:12 I wrote the whole thing. Can you believe it? Yeah, I have a book, but when did it come out? Like 2000, a while ago. 2019, 2018, 2018. Wow. What is it? It's called My Squirrel Days.
Starting point is 00:26:23 It's a book of personal essays. Funny, funny. It's not a memoir. Wow. What is it? It's called my squirrel days. It's a it's a it's a book of personal essays. Funny. Funny. It's not a memoir. Yeah. I don't. I don't. Memoir. Memoir implies like you're working through some shit, right? Well, and it implies you've led a life worth reading about. I mean, nothing. Honestly, all the stuff we can't talk about. I'd like to read about. Well, that's exactly. You know what? You know, I would I'd take it back. I'd take it back. But a memoir to me implies someone older, someone in their 70s or 80s, and who has, like, held the double-edged-up- I think it'd be illegal to write a memoir until you hit 70.
Starting point is 00:26:52 100%. And I think sometimes the bookstores will classify something under memoir, and I think, oh, that's not really a memoir, but I understand what you mean. I wonder if Jeanette McCurdy was at a memoir? That seems like a memoir because it was like dealing with, with like deep shit with her mom and stuff like that. Yeah, all right, that counts as a memoir. There, that, that you know what I mean? Jeanette McCurdy from the comedy band,
Starting point is 00:27:10 Bang, Bang TV Show, which we can't talk about, obviously. Don't mention it. But she, one day saw me walking on the street and yelled at her car to me. To say hi or some propanity. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. It was just like, hey, fuck you asshole. She's got some. Has, has that ever happened to you? We're like someone you, fuck you! She's got some.
Starting point is 00:27:25 Has that ever happened to you where like someone, either you have yelled at a pedestrian out of your car and then you realize you know them a vice versa? Oh, yes, in my neighborhood. It was fearless when I lived there, yeah. And you yelled out some sort of profanity. I honked, I honked to someone. I honked at her, she's my actual neighbor
Starting point is 00:27:42 and I honked at her not knowing it was her. I forgot why I was here. And then you realized it was her and you went, uh oh. You know what, I played it off. It's like, hey, girl. I just get honking. I almost ran into, I almost drove into Carl Targ, like on foot.
Starting point is 00:27:56 Oh no. Down the street, he just finger at me. And I was like, I wonder if he knew it was me. And I like came up to him next time I saw him and said, did you know that was me and the car he goes? Yeah. Oh, as soon as the finger wag went, he knew that it was me. He knew it was me before the finger wag.
Starting point is 00:28:12 He saw it was me. I almost hit him with my car anyway. I gave me the de-cambit. But what I love about that is that if you did actually almost knock him over or hit him, remarkably calm. Yeah, he was very calm. He's so chill about everything. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:28:27 One of the most chillest. He's so chill about near death. But that was embarrassing. But I have other stories of friends who have had worse experiences where it's like very mortifying when they realize who they've- That has to happen a lot in my hand. It has to.
Starting point is 00:28:40 Right, so that's why it's like be very chill while you're driving. You couldn't be more, and are you a good driver? Would you say, yeah? Yeah, I take it slow I'm, are you a good driver? Would you say? Yeah, I'm, I take it slow, slow and low. But do people get mad behind you? Because that's- Someone got mad at me yesterday. And I was being very careful about,
Starting point is 00:28:55 there was a biker next to me on a regular bike, on a pedal bike. And I didn't want to make that right turn because I was like, I feel like I'm gonna cut him off and someone just whaah. Right behind you. I never, and what was your reaction? Nothing.
Starting point is 00:29:10 Because it's just, I went, fuck you. Low and slow. Low and slow. All the time. All right, we need to get to, we can go low and slow. We need to get to our next guest.
Starting point is 00:29:18 I know it. They are exotic snake breeders. I don't believe we've ever spoken to an exotic snake breeder let alone two at the same time. Hopefully they won't talk at the same time. They'll take turns, but we'll figure out the logistics of it as we talk to them. But please welcome to the show for the first time,
Starting point is 00:29:36 running in gunk little. Thank you so much. Thank you. Hey, dang, how are you? Shoot, shoot, shoot. Great to see you guys. It's a hit to be here. Thank you so much for having us.
Starting point is 00:29:47 We don't get to talk on a lot of radio programs, and we really appreciate you having us here. Now, if I'm guessing you're from the South, from the Lil' St. David away, your voices. You started again. And also your T-shirts. Oh, well, yeah, this is just a classic, classic black poppies. It's a compass.
Starting point is 00:30:02 That's basically with, that's pointing down to the S says down south. That's all right. Well, if you read it on the bat, oh, what is on the back? It says down south. It's all right. So on the front and the back. Yeah, well, in the back, it's a little cheekier, you know,
Starting point is 00:30:17 if you know what I mean, it's points down the butt to the crack exactly. You got it, you got it. Yeah, man, I mean, you, you city folk, you really, you do, you catch up. Yeah, we really do. Welcome to the show guys. This is Ellie.
Starting point is 00:30:28 It's great to see you. I asked the meet you. I asked the meet you too. Yeah, I don't think I'm familiar, but nice to see you. Is that host of podcasts? Oh, oh, yeah, I've heard of that. That's like, yeah, it's like radio on your phone.
Starting point is 00:30:38 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, what, but let's, let's turn to what you guys do. What, what, what exactly, your exotic snake breeders meaning you What once they're born do you get rid of them or but you you basically are like making different types of snakes We love snakes. We want to make more snikes We love them and we just we we got to make more of them. Yeah, I mean, that's like Doritos right they'll they'll make more is that that, well, it's very similar to Doritos in that, like, people do like them and they do want you
Starting point is 00:31:09 to make more of them. People don't like snakes as much as they like Doritos and that's actually a big problem in our world, but, you know, we're trying to get them to that sort of level of ubiquity. I mean, I'd love if snakes were like prangles. Once you pop, you just can't stop. Yeah, that's right.
Starting point is 00:31:22 So you're hoping, and how are you going to do this through getting information out there, getting the word out, but you're hoping that snakes are as popular as chips? Well, actually, we provide a special service at our snake. What do you call it? What do you call it? If you don't know. I just always forget our snake breeding ground, if you will. It's an enclosure. An enclosure, yeah if you will we we We can in enclosure and enclosure yeah, yeah, we are snake breeding enclosure because there are certain snakes you know snakes have
Starting point is 00:31:51 Designs on they got little what you know about snow yeah, what are you talking about? Let's start there. Okay. Yeah, yeah Yeah, I'm starting it. I'm starting it on from zero to 100. I'm starting at 10. I know they slither I know the dawn of legs. Okay, I'm gonna give you two more credit Two things you know about four tongue four tongue four tongue. So I'm 15. These are good facts I'm gonna give you a little more credit than that. You're at about 60. That's pretty good That's that's high They're long okay, okay shoot their reptiles dang shoot They have eyes dang shoot. Okay. I think they have noses. Dang. I think They have eyes. Dang. Shoot.
Starting point is 00:32:25 Okay. I think they have noses. Dang. I think they have noses. Okay. So I didn't realize we were sitting with an expert at the table. That's crazy. Y'all know anatomy. Y'all know how they move. They have a vertebrae. Dang. No.
Starting point is 00:32:37 How could that be? How could they sit there? They got bones. They got bones and shit. They got bones and shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They got a nervous system and all that good stuff. Yeah. Yeah. They can feel pain. Yeah. Yeah, they got a nervous system and all that good stuff. Yeah, they can feel pain. Yeah, thank you. Oh, yeah
Starting point is 00:32:47 No, we know that what we also know that they could feel love too. Oh really? Yeah, I know that for sure Well when we're breeding them we don't just make them go at it now There's there's snake breeders and then there's us right yeah, you got some people are gonna take a couple reptiles Put them in a bin lock them away Forget about it come back next lock them away, forget about it, come back next month. Forget about it. Forget about it. I love when you do that. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:09 Sometimes he pretends like he's from New York. I went to New York City one time. I had a layover in New York City. And where are you going? Where was I going? There was a layover in New York City. I was, you know what? I was, I was on my way to Manitoba, Canada.
Starting point is 00:33:23 Oh, see? He knew. One new sky? Yeah. Yeah any other questions point Dexter So you have business Manitoba I had some business let's just say I had some business in Manitoba We bring our snakes all over internet everywhere you can send you're breathing snakes really you can't bring out a snake on a plane I think there's a movie you can't know we can't talk about Snake on a plane. I think there's a movie. No, we can't talk about that. We got to talk about that. We got that actually. And you know what? The reason we don't talk about it is that it actually, it made our business seem like it was, you know, at fault for the incident. And we had nothing to do with it.
Starting point is 00:33:53 The movie snakes on a plane was based on you. It's not based on us directly, but it's based on, you know, people in our, in an incident, just they put the whole snake business, you know, uh, put us on high alert. Yeah, on high on, on high alert. Yeah, that's a good way to put it. Yeah, we were on high alert. They're coming for our next. Yeah, okay, yeah. That's interesting.
Starting point is 00:34:15 But so, so most breeders just put the snakes in a box and let them go, let them go out and do something. And they enjoy, right? Well, for the most part part but our snakes really like it because we make sure they fall in love. Oh, we make sure that these snakes are compatible on multiple facets. What a attractiveness, basic aesthetics, personality, personality. Yeah, we're actually talking to the snakes friends just saying what does she really like or what do they really like? Yeah, we have
Starting point is 00:34:44 kind of do a bit of a we have a matchmaking algorithm on paper. It's called the M-A-S-H. Yeah. It's M-A-M-A-S-H, like match, but for snakes. Yeah, it's simply that. Dang, that is that word, huh? M-A-S-H. Yeah, well we just pick four letters.
Starting point is 00:35:03 Like mobile army surgical hospital although we So we come from military background. It's you know, it's all right, right? So so we're getting to know our critters Yeah, we're getting to know him. We're getting to know what turns them on. What do they like? What do they not like do you like music? Do you like eye contact? Yeah, what time of day is good for you? You know, yeah, what are the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, This is you know this all female snakes or size queens and that's just out it. It's just how it is I just how it is look and we've tried to breed that out of a line It gets stronger and stronger and stronger. They won't thickies. They won't long ease. Wow another thing snakes really value is eating pussy What like snakes? Yeah, well like it's their snake pussy's a Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean they got the. It's yeah, well no wonder they go so crazy for it They're going buck wild down there, right and the forked tongue. I would imagine pleasures
Starting point is 00:36:10 Two things. Yes, I had I had I was quick to mention that I knew they had forked Tons to all snakes up worked tongues. They all go double times. Yeah, yeah, one Never mind. I'm not gonna say what I was about to say. It's gonna be too nasty too nasty even for you You don't want to open which one you by the way are you? I'm Ron. I'm not going to say what I was about to say. It's gonna be too nasty. Too nasty even for you. You don't want to open with the nasty. Which one? Which one? I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny.
Starting point is 00:36:29 I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny.
Starting point is 00:36:37 I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. I'm Ronny. you pop, you can. Oh, yeah. Well, don't you've got to tell me twice, go
Starting point is 00:36:45 So do the snakes they they appreciate this right and they are you some of our closest friends I I can imagine that we get edible arrangements sent to us a lot from the snakes. Thank you cards It's a lot of you know, it's like crickets and other little bugs and like my Edible arrangements of the bay would eat. Yeah, like they can, they only have access to so much, you know, mice. Yeah, other small, maybe a small bird. Yeah, yeah. Oh, what's the biggest thing is snakes every, biggest thing is snakes.
Starting point is 00:37:12 John Boyard. Hey, got me there. And I think I saw it too. Any other questions, boy, next year. Hey, I asked you to stop calling me boy dexter. Okay, I'm gonna ask you to take those pens out of your pocket. Alright, here we go. So, are you more successful than other breeders?
Starting point is 00:37:32 Like, do you have more? What does it find the most unique snack? We have the most unique snack. The most beautiful snacks you've ever seen in your entire life. Basically, you know, you can print an image on a t-shirt. You know how you can do that? You can bring in any image you want. Yeah, you've ordered t-shirts. Order know how you can do that? You can bring in any image you want. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:45 You've ordered t-shirts. I've ordered them. Did you ever receive them? I got one. I got one. It was like a, I sent out a photo to the company. Oh, okay. What was the thing?
Starting point is 00:37:57 You might be asking what the thing was. It was my sister and her now husband. It was, it was like. This is before they were together. Well, before they got married. Oh, yeah. It's before they were together. Well before they got married They were together and I thought hey that's a For like an engagement for a something like that, but did you get one t-shirt more than one? I got I guess I got two t-shirts, but it was a photo base if the takeaways It was a photo on a t-shirt. So yeah, you can do it. You can do it. Okay, and you can do it and you can do it But what if I told you you can do it and you can do it. You can do it. Okay. And you can do it. And you can do it.
Starting point is 00:38:25 You can. But what if I told you you can do it and you can also do it on a snake? What? What? We can get any image on a snake that you need. Any kind of picture, any kind of design you want, not just the standard, you know,
Starting point is 00:38:37 to strap it look or, you know, sort of zig-zagged, you might see on a normal snake. So like the declaration of independence if I wanted that on a snake? That's what you want. We'll do it. We'll breed it. You'll breed it. Well, you have to understand that images and colors and stripes and patterns. You all get there by breeding it in two of the lines. Yeah, yeah, there's what we call, we call it line. Right. So you would have to find two different snakes that have separate elements of the, we want that look like parchment paper and the
Starting point is 00:39:04 other that look like ink with a quill. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then eventually you'd get it where the words actually made sense. Yes, months after months of romantic sex. That's it. Months. Just months. Well, that's great. You don't you don't know how long they would go at it. They would be snakes. They take their time down there.
Starting point is 00:39:18 Oh, sure. Yeah. Yeah. No, I guess Ellie was trying to say that it seemed like a short time. Oh, yeah. Oh, sorry. I thought months. month, to me that like believe me, but I, but you're not a time more. But you said that mistakes are fucking for months? They can if they're really into it. If they're that in love, they get into some stuff down there. No, another thing we can't breed out of the snakes is Tantra.
Starting point is 00:39:37 Oh, yeah, they're just really like to take their time. They really like to feel it. They really like to just zan out into it. And when, when sting, you know the singer Sting, when it came out about that of like, oh, what amazing branding he had just to come out and be like, oh, by the way, I have sex for five hours. Yeah, this is something I don't understand
Starting point is 00:39:54 about city folk in general. Everyone has to know how horny everyone is. I have to know this about this guy. How horny are you on level of like, right now? Like zero to praise. Be honest. Okay, fine, two. Two. That's not nothing. No, I could get it started if I had to, but I just I'm working. Right. What? Yeah, you're at work. Yeah, this is a workplace. Yeah, everyone's a little horny. Sure. So, wait, by the way, where are you
Starting point is 00:40:18 based out of? What? Where are you based out of the South point that's their South of the nice Dixie below Mississippi. Yeah, okay. Sorry. Sorry east of the Mississippi is We just can't actually say the exact address. We come for our compound. You come for our enclosures. Yeah, we don't we don't we need a year to You know, advertise your business But we don't want you to come in and find it nice. How many stakes do you have? But we don't want you to be in and find it nice. How many stakes do you have here? Oh, so that's it. Go! But we're not supposed to say how much we got on deck.
Starting point is 00:40:49 Oh, we got one snake. Okay, you know, well, no, we gotta make it sound. We gotta make it sound. How many dozens to see? Obviously, you have more than one snake. Okay, we got as many snakes as you could even think of right now. They can think of 23. How many can you think of?
Starting point is 00:41:02 Just the different types of snakes. No, just snakes, I could think of a thousand snakes Okay, well that's we we are on on our good you might have met your match here Yeah, I'm very impressed with both of you and how much you know about snakes This is huge most people can't say a number when we say think of a number of snakes They go I can't even think about it. It's hard for me to imagine more than 23 like I I start to have like a door opens and a 24th one starts to come in and the door just faces out You ever watch fear factor. Yeah. Oh of course we supplied this nice. I love the host So I was a big fan of his you went back
Starting point is 00:41:37 I was like does he have these interesting things to say to his previous job? So so you guys are successful or do you make money at this? I mean, we're doing okay. We're doing all right. We took a plane out here. I flew to Manitoba that one time, so you tell me. Sounds like no. I don't know. They seem happy, which isn't that a measure of? That's a good, yeah, that's a roof over my head. I got food stuck in my teeth. We get to watch. And I go, let's do it. It's pretty nice. Yeah. Do you have a floor? Of course, I got a floor. Scott, you think I'm floating? I don't know. I get to watch. And I go, do it. It's pretty nice. Yeah. Do you have a floor? Of course I got a floor, Scott.
Starting point is 00:42:07 You think I'm floating? I don't know. I don't know. You think I'm just hovering around? Don't get it. I can't afford a floor. Don't talk to him like that. But so rich you're hovering.
Starting point is 00:42:16 I'm so poor I can't afford to put my feet on the ground. Come on Scott. Shoot. Do you have to praise this guy? I have praise Ronnie. I have a whole lot of kids. Yeah, I accept your apology. I took it personally. Come on Scott. Shoot. Do you have to praise this guy? It's crazy, Ronnie. I apologize. I accept your apology.
Starting point is 00:42:27 I took it personally. I tend to think anyone from the South is like a dumb, hit, who's poor. Correct. No, we're poor. Can't argue with that. For the most part, hey, it walks like a duck and acts like a duck.
Starting point is 00:42:39 Exactly. We consider ourselves kind of scientists in a way because we're getting in the mix. You guys are amazing Intellectually, I mean the the fact that you can breed anything on to a snake is the first time anybody's are said that man Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. God. Can I just be vulnerable with you for a second? Yeah, please. Thank you so much for that stunning compliment Oh, it's my blood. This is the first time you've called me Scott. So thank you so much for that. Hey, I said a point extra Okay, I forgot time you've called me Scott so thank you so much for that. Is that a point extra?
Starting point is 00:43:02 Okay, I forgot. He forgot. He forgot. He forgot. Wait, I was touched by it. You're just saying you forgot? No, I just, I didn't feel like calling you that like that in the moment. And I now I see the air in my ways and I don't.
Starting point is 00:43:15 You're way, no, I like it. No, I've calling you point extra previously and I'd like to just offer you my humblest apologies. I forgive you. That was good. I never. Good job, Ron. Hey, I forgive you. That was but I never good job Ron. Hey working on that That's my style. All right Well, so I love that you guys are are into it. I mean Ellie
Starting point is 00:43:32 What would you want on a snake? Oh on a snake? Yeah, this picture that you talk about ice cream So I think I'd like just an ice cream themed snake. Okay. Yeah, the two together is sort of are you a cone or a cup gal cone? Yeah, imagine eating it like licking an ice cream cone and then suddenly the snake pops out. Well, so it's upsetting, right? It's an upsetting. But a snake with little ice cream cone pattern on it. That's that's what I'm going to work. Yeah, that's more of what we do.
Starting point is 00:43:58 We don't turn them into the shape. No, I don't want them to be ice cream. That you're licking an ice cream cone and you're like, this tastes weird. Yeah. And it's just a snake that's coiled up. Yeah. Scott, I don't want them to be ice cream. You're looking at ice cream cone, and you're like, this tastes weird. And it's just a snake that's coiled up. Yeah, I'm gonna say. I don't, I, oh, I'm glad. And the rattle is the ice cream? We tried that.
Starting point is 00:44:13 We tried that. No, that's not, no. We tried it. Yeah, so you guys tried that first. That was, we tried many different snake entrepreneurial goals until we got to breeding, okay? It's been a long walk up to this point. It started with a very general interest of snakes
Starting point is 00:44:29 based on the character from The Simpsons. We said that guy's funny. What's the name after? You know that thug guy, he's always like, oh, yeah. So you guys liked the scene? We saw him and we said, he's our guy.
Starting point is 00:44:42 That's our favorite guy. Why isn't he on the couch at the beginning of the show? What's his story? And then we found out that his name was snake. We said, what is it? What is that? What is a snake? The way you were talking, I thought you came from a line of snake breeders or at least that it had been something. You know what they say when you assume? Sometimes you're wrong. You know what? That's true. That's true, and I shouldn't have a say. Yeah, but that's interesting.
Starting point is 00:45:06 That would be great to have like a snake in your house that had like ice cream cone size. It would just be fun. Yeah, that's what we're trying to get out there. A lot of times we're saying, hey, would you like one of these snakes? People get scared and they scream loud. And dare I say high pitched. Very high pitch.
Starting point is 00:45:20 Hmm. So, and these are males and females. Every, everyone, every which way, anyway, you can imagine it. Absolutely. Yeah. How are you? How are you? How are you? You say it very well, not not. So you first you knock first, we're knocking on a door. Yeah. Like, hey, we're trying to unload 70s snakes. You want one with the fun design on it or something. We can put anything you want on it. And are you like holding the snakes at the time? Yeah, I wear them. Yeah, wear them. What do you mean, wear them? So I just kind of, I just kind of,
Starting point is 00:45:46 kind of like a Michelin man. Yeah. They sort of circle around me. Oh. Yeah. And so that way you can kind of see all the different patterns and designs that we play. Well, that's speaking of corporate mascots.
Starting point is 00:45:57 That would be terrible if like the Pillsbury Doe Boy were at your house and you poked him in the belly and turned out to be a snake. Just wrapped up like a Pillsbury Doe Boy. You got to get off of this. That's not what we do at all. Okay, I'm just saying. Yeah, it would be bad, but we don't do that.
Starting point is 00:46:11 But you're the Michelin man with the snakes. It's similar to that. I mean, you come out, Scott, what are you doing, man? If I were to see the Michelin man in the wild, you're making a good upset. I would want to go over and hug. Uh-huh. But he's, you don't, just because they're both fluffy. Don't mean you put them in the tummy. Okay, Scott
Starting point is 00:46:30 Oh, if you see the Michelin man, you say thanks for the tires and thanks for the recommendation to the nice restaurant Could I get your autograph from Ghostbusters? Is the guy recommending the restaurant? It's the same thing. Yeah, it's that big man. He goes around He's on the book. He's the same guy. They would know it's him. Like he's so iconic looking. Yeah, they do know it's him because it is. And it's the same thing. Well, this, I mean, Ellie, have you ever owned this? I mean, we talked about that. But we talked about it, but I never owned a snake. I haven't wanted to, but this discussion is, it's not, it's sort of peaking my interest.
Starting point is 00:47:05 I have a fantastic opinion. I do find snakes a little, I might be one of the people, you know, screaming at a high pitch, because I do think there's something about it that's just like, I don't know, if you're bigger than that, that's what it is. Yeah, well, you know, they're creepy,
Starting point is 00:47:20 cookie, the cold. Yeah, yeah. They're eat, right? Like in the Bible, there's a story about an evil snake. See, that's where they get a lot of the misconceptions. Yeah, from the when it gets creepy. They're cold. Yeah. Yeah. They're eat right. They like in the Bible There's a story about an evil snake. See that's where they get a lot of the Misconceived from the jungle. They've been they've been they've faced adversity if I were snakes I would do a class action lawsuit against the Bible. Yes, and you know what they'd win they'd win There's they got the numbers behind them. They you know, I know there's a lot of striking going a lot They got a strong union. Yeah, that's nice. Got a strong union of the snake. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:45 And Rand, Rand talked about it. Yeah. I know exactly what you're talking about. Scott. Just speaking my language in 1983, I believe. Do you ever seen a snake cry? Like have you ever seen a snake so tender? They really are.
Starting point is 00:48:00 It's a beautiful, beautiful creature. A heart broken snake. No, no. That must happen with you guys a lot because they're in actual relations. Every once in a while, we'll walk into a door and it's very quiet and the air is very still on a snake is just staring outside of the window.
Starting point is 00:48:15 Like it's waiting for somebody to come home and unfortunately, we know. Yeah. You know, and you know, when they shed their skin, they sort of like can be a little different. You know, it's like you kind of they sort of like can be a little different, you know? It's like, you kinda, they sort of, oh yeah, I would imagine they're,
Starting point is 00:48:27 do their designs change? The designs don't change, the designs stay. The, it sheds with the skin and it stays put too. But, you know, sometimes you might, you might come out acting a little different. Oh, so they act different. Does it, it could be a personality shift. A personality shift.
Starting point is 00:48:43 Have you seen split? Oh, never mind. Oh. Can't talk about split. No. Can a sequel do unbreakable? The airsoft sequel to unbreakable. Of course.
Starting point is 00:48:51 Do you know what? I guess it's a middle, it's like unbreakable 1.5. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. How often do they shed this? Just that. The sequel to the... No, no, no, no, I have a question.
Starting point is 00:49:03 No, how often do the do snakes shed their skin? Pretty often. I'd say every at least every day kind of. Yeah, once per night. Yeah, once per night. It's a post-nut sort of thing. Not or night. Is it? No, I said nut.
Starting point is 00:49:17 What did he say? N-U-T. N-U-T after they... Yeah, extra T. I think it's a perflis you know what I mean it really gets the point across though I don't see it's sort of like not the nut your thing But they don't add an extra M to come Why not? Imagine if they can you know what those memes come when they say this is the world if it was if this specific thing happened
Starting point is 00:49:44 It's like a future society. Sure, I know what you're talking about, the same way you know what I'm talking about when I say the Union of the States. Well, trust me, if we spelled come with two amps, we'd be living in a future society, okay? No pollution. No social stratification.
Starting point is 00:49:58 We guys are on the same page of it. You've talked about this? We do not disagree on pretty much anything. No, we get, we're like the two best guys we know. You know what I mean? This is a strong connection. Yeah. How did you mean?
Starting point is 00:50:09 Oh, your brothers. No. Oh, no. No, no, no. We don't say, we sort of do a white stripes sort of thing. Oh, but you have the same last name. Is it a stage names? It's like, well, it's a white stripes thing, Scott.
Starting point is 00:50:22 Yeah. It's a, are they, are they want or are they the other are you guys together These are the question whatever gets you to be You know a purchaser of a design snake. I like to think about you guys having sex if I were to buy a snake Hey, that's that's you that's between you and your God all right I get the mentality though It's like hey if they're fucking the, the things that they want to make fuck can probably fuck.
Starting point is 00:50:46 I get that's why you got. And you know what? Yeah. Let's take the word fucking out of it. Yeah. Making love. I'm sorry, because these things, they make love, right? They make love.
Starting point is 00:50:56 It's absolutely. Sometimes they like really are going at it in a way that I'm like, I can't even say that. Well, sometimes when you're making love, the animal instinct takes over and you're just like, this is turned into fucking somehow. You know what I'm like, I can't even say that. Sometimes when you're making love, the animal instinct takes over and you're just like, this has turned into fucking somehow. You know what I'm saying. I know exactly what you're saying. The crossover. There's a crossover often.
Starting point is 00:51:11 Yeah, yeah, you know, when the movie goes back into making love, hopefully when you're in the post-coit scene, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly. That's a little too fancy for me, but you know. Yeah. Well, how many snakes do you have to sell in order to be in the black here this year?
Starting point is 00:51:29 I mean, we're doing pretty good right now. I would say, you know, probably just like three more, three more snakes probably. Yeah, not that many. Just one more than the Arnold Schwarzenegger. Just an easy three. Yeah. Okay. An easy three by the Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Starting point is 00:51:41 Well, two more. I guess. Two more. It's not a two more. Okay, so I just want to, I mean, yeah, hang on. I had to say it in his voice to get it, you know. You did a great impression. We are, you know, impressionist by Chris.
Starting point is 00:51:54 Are you also an impressionist? I do two impressions. Okay, let's hear it's Bobbi called well. Yeah. And I do. That's your Bobby called. I guess you wonder if I'm a snail. I guess we got a lot of snakes.
Starting point is 00:52:07 So you do Bobby called, well, talking about, or singing about it. Well, that's how we get our jingle. I do my Bobby called well impression. We get our business jingle. Can I hear the jingle and you're at pretty much? I guess you wonder if they're snakes. If they're snakes.
Starting point is 00:52:20 We've got a lot, a lot of snakes. Snakes. I would have thought Bobby Caldwell was here in the room. If I weren't here, if I just heard this on a radio, I would have heard this. Although I would wonder why this was happening when I was here. Why if you weren't here?
Starting point is 00:52:35 That would be, oh, that would be a minute. If you ever need somebody to pick up the slack, we'll come in. We'll fly back in, we can pick this way. I would say, I wouldn't mind it too much. Yeah. You want to take a little bit? Too much.
Starting point is 00:52:44 Maybe you guys can do a CBB presents as well. Oh, yeah, whatever. Whatever votes you vote. Yeah, look at interview different snakes. We could talk about this place. We like to vacation call. Could you tell me you could do? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:54 No, wait, are you part of the coo store? What are you talking about? No, we just vacation there. Oh, no. We've been to coo store and it's beautiful this time. Okay, I don't want to talk about coo store. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. I'm going to to talk about you. Ellie, I don't want to talk about custopia. I'm not sure.
Starting point is 00:53:06 You can ask about it. I'm just like, we're on a strike from custopia. All right, we have to take a break. When we come back, we're going to have more from Ronnie and junk. Of course, have more from Ellie Kemper.
Starting point is 00:53:16 And we have a local brewer is going to be here. This is a very exciting show. We'll be right back with more comedy band. I have this. Comedy band, we're back. Ellie comedy band, man. Have this. Tumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumumum knowledge far ahead. Yeah, we banked a lot far ahead. You know, we just didn't know what the future might hold. Yeah, we just decided to bank them away. And then and what's the release strategy? Why did you release them eight or nine months or a weeks ago, I guess. I then I'm not sure there was a strategy. Yeah, no, we went into a blind. We're just releasing them every week of it.
Starting point is 00:53:59 A throwing them out there into people's earbuds and and so far it's going really well. I don't know if it's going well. I feel like what are the numbers? Have we seen the numbers are we're getting like we're averaging about 4,000. Okay. I don't know what the numbers are. I don't know what I just said. Oh, okay. So you don't know what I'm sorry. I don't know what the number is. Okay. I don't even know what, what would that be the number of people listening? Well, I was, to be honest, I was trying to make, the most, you know, I was trying to make it seem good, but I was a little sorry for you.
Starting point is 00:54:32 I just thought of your eyes, it's your, I said, what number did I say? Was that four thousand? No, I know, I said, sorry, what I mean is, it would be good.
Starting point is 00:54:40 Like listeners a week, I guess. What is the number? I have no idea how many people are listening a week and I wouldn't even know what a good number was. Mm, more than 4,000. What would you say, what can I ask about yours? Why not, couple of minutes? No.
Starting point is 00:54:53 All right. 4,000 sounds like 4,000 in one over here. Are the numbers, so this is a really great learning experiment because as I said, this is my first time a being a- No, for a new show, four thousand is great if you're getting four thousand that's great I don't four thousand was pulled out of a hat I have no a boy a sorting hat like mr. Harry Potter yes
Starting point is 00:55:13 haha haha you do impressions do the half blood prince he's right here he's out in the room with him oh he is oh I want to be look at all you muggles I hate muggles I made it up I made it up I don't want to be you muggles I hate muggles. I made it up. I made it up. I don't want to be you made it up Yeah, I made up the number 4,000 did it not exist until just right now. No, it was not in what you tell me Yeah, 3999 4,000 and one yeah, and I'm introducing to the world to this idea of 4,000. Big premiere. Hey, y'all, new numbers just dropped. A new number of 4,000 is out. Well, if you remember earlier, I could imagine 1,000 snakes.
Starting point is 00:55:50 You did good. Yeah, you're doing really good. Well, so there was first, I mentioned 1,000 and now I'm mentioning 4,000. So there's two numbers I know about. You're kind of doing that thing where you go, do you want this or should I double it and give it to another?
Starting point is 00:56:01 And then you did that two times and you thought of 4,000. That's, wow. I think that is exactly how I landed it. A thousand, right? No. I don't know. I don't think you should be asking us about numbers.
Starting point is 00:56:13 That would be what? Isn't a thousand. A thousand, it's a thousand times a thousand. What? It's a thousand. A thousand or something. That's that number's two. I think it's a thousand.
Starting point is 00:56:22 Hey, there's a strike on math. So luckily you're going, okay, you're in the clear. That's not different. Yeah, not much. Trons to do the state. We're gonna get to our next guests. They're on tour right now. Let's get to our next guest.
Starting point is 00:56:34 She's a local brewer. Oh, this is exciting because I'm in the market for a drink. I love a brew. Yep, right about now. Please welcome to show breath. I want a glowy angel. It's like a... Oh, the taste. Dang, dang. Dang. A brew right about now please welcome to show breath That's 15 How are you Brett? so great to meet you.
Starting point is 00:57:08 So you're a local brewer. Where do you brew? How do you brew the reporter's questions? Or why how when? That's awesome. I actually just launched the very first brewery on wheels. Oh, that's great. I mean, the wheel is the world's first invention.
Starting point is 00:57:28 That's it. Yeah, so to add that to the wheel. Is that true? I believe so. I mean, fire maybe, although I like to think that's an act of God, like a lightning bolt came down and it just existed. I think the wheel is probably the first thing they were like,
Starting point is 00:57:42 man, see that circular rock? If I put this thing onto that, I bet it would do this thing, right? Right. Yeah, that is the first invention. Yeah, definitely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so to put that onto your brewery. Right, for sure.
Starting point is 00:57:56 Yes, it's like, well, it's not the first brewery on wheels, but it's got the most wheels. So it's a truck, but then we're on skate. Wait, it's a, it's like an 18 wheeler truck. That's correct. And then you're on skate. And then all the servers are on skate. Shit, it's mercy. But that's a lot of wheels. That's what we're called. That's a lot of wheels. And all your call, it's called that's a lot of wheels, ellipsis ellipsis, and also IPAs and no sideers. Why two ellipses?
Starting point is 00:58:29 Only because I feel like three can get into the difficult territory. And one usually serves its purpose, though, doesn't matter. Can I ask a question? Absolutely. Do you have sideers? No, we're straight out of sideers. I think question.
Starting point is 00:58:41 We got a sour beer. It's called the Mr. Tumnus's Whisper. This one you're going to get notes of Persemin's Turkish Delight and you're going to feel that Plexiglass finish. Yeah, that's real Shards of Glass. That's a lot. Why don't you try that one out for size? You brought a bunch of these. Wow. Okay. Yeah, you guys are all going to be doing a sick-ass flight. I don't know that I want to be drinking something that is Shards of Glass in the night. Well, that's okay, Scott, because I have this system.
Starting point is 00:59:06 I'm gonna learn a little bit about you and then I can figure out the perfect brood for you. Okay, so ask me some questions then. You'll figure out the perfect brew and they'll figure out a snake that wants to have sex with me. I love that. Okay, that's not what we do. On it. Okay, go to it. You guys hook human beings up with snakes. Yeah, I get cool about it, brother. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:59:25 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:59:33 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:59:41 I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. It asked me these. All right, crushing one. What kind of moon do you like the best? Like up in the sky, what kind of moon? Full, half, or no moon. I mean, if I'm gonna be looking at it, I want that baby to be full. Okay, so otherwise it's not worth my time to tilt my neck.
Starting point is 00:59:58 Hunter protect, hunter protect. All right, that threw me off, because I thought you would say no moon for sure. All right, question two. Like where I thought you would say no moon for sure. Oh, all right question like where it didn't exist Yeah, I think the tides would be affected. I think our orbit would Meaning it's you just can't see it. You can't see that's what I'm saying Yeah, yeah, yeah, see I understood. Do you want me to switch my answer? Well, Scott? No, don't ever fucking mind me switch my answer. Well, Scott, no, don't ever fucking lie to me.
Starting point is 01:00:23 They're really, that would be a really messed up. Okay, look, I said, I'm happy to have you on the show. That was a lie. Okay, whoa. I, I, I, nothing I just liking you on the show. I just, I don't give a shit if you're here or not. Not that's no problem. So, from, from here on in though,
Starting point is 01:00:39 I, total, tell me the 100% truth pinky promise. Yeah. All right, last question, too. When you think about your mom, are you like my mom's a bitch or my mom's sick? Your mom, not my mom's, sorry. Oh, oh, I think I'm, I mean, somewhere in between, honestly,
Starting point is 01:00:56 like everyone has issues with their parents, right? I mean, but it's a binary choice. It's just gotta be one of the other. Or something in the middle, whatever. Yeah, something in the middle. Like she can get on my nerves, certainly, I like very very cool. And are you silly? Yeah Is that gonna be an issue if I am or well? Yeah, I am. Yeah, so okay. Let me just go in the archives here archives
Starting point is 01:01:22 This is the beer that canors to our diabetic crowd. This one's called the lock stocking barrel. You're going to get those fish notes in there. 18% solid IPA. Don't be operating on your machine or when you're drinking this. Got cheers. Oh, thank you. Oh, try that up for size. How heavy is the machine? You'll notice that there's no carbonation and it is at 72 degrees. That's flat. That's Oh, that's flat. That's very flat. You feel that buzz in the back, that's a B. There's a B in there.
Starting point is 01:01:50 Oh, geez. Oh. Oh, are you okay? Oh, I need that. I think it's stung my throat. That's good luck. Yes. I mean, I guess there's a worm in tequila,
Starting point is 01:02:02 so it's not the weirdest thing. Well, it was unexpected. Are you okay? Are snakes and drinks ever? Are snakes and drinks? You can put a snake in a drink. I for sure actually seen a full snake in a bottle somewhere in Southeast Asia. Yeah, I mean, there's snakes in like baskets. Yeah, and then you know, you got to charge them out, of course. Yeah, you know, you better put them out.
Starting point is 01:02:22 You can put a snake in a lot of things. Basket, playing, and drink. You guys can kind of snake charmers in of course. Yeah, you know, you don't want to put them out. You put a snake in a lot of thing basket Planting snake charmers in a way. Yeah, I Forget love that song so I got a confession I like bread. I didn't really like that. No, that's no problem I got stonk and now it's swelling up as well. I mean I have a 50% success rate with that sort of stuff Why didn't you ask if I'm allergic to bees too, because I feel like I'm really swelling up. So actually put your leg out.
Starting point is 01:02:48 The FB pens, the fun part. Oh, okay, hit it with it. Yeah. Soup. Why do you say soup? The FB pen and the M. Is it working here? That serve with soup.
Starting point is 01:02:57 Here's a Gazpacho, my man. Oh, cold. Cold. A summer soup, if you will. All right. Oh, what is in the Gaspaceo? What is that? So that is, it's a pickleback shot.
Starting point is 01:03:09 Starts off with the, it starts with that. Start the pickleback shot. You're going to notice some garlic, some onion, some ribbons. Some ribbons, like the kind that are on pretty presents. From prepirists. From prepirists. The prepirists, the wrapping paper store? That's correct.
Starting point is 01:03:28 Oh, God. I don't, yeah, at least the swelling's going down. Why do you have so many inedible things in your... For the story, man. What, you're gonna be telling people about this? Like, I wasn't happy. Listen, I was doing music for a long time and there it is. I had this song.
Starting point is 01:03:47 Do you mind if I sing a little bit of it? Yeah, I guess. Hey crack open the brew. Hey, got nothing to do. We're driving down the 101 and yeah, we're having so much fun because we're drunk. We're drunk on the road. That's, I mean, I, I, I think the melodies, I thought the melody was sweet. Yeah. I don't like the spirit of the song. I don't think I'm, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm iffy on it.
Starting point is 01:04:17 But yeah, I, oh, I definitely don't. They came down all of us. I, yeah. Shit, no drunk on the road. What about being a passenger drunk? That's okay. That's what I meant. That's fine. Because we're drunk in the passenger drunk on the road. What about being a passenger drunk? That's okay, right? That's what I meant. That's fine.
Starting point is 01:04:26 Cause you drunk in the passenger seat on the road. Oh, I didn't, we cut you off before you could get for it. I didn't get to the bridge. So wait, so you were a musician and then what? I was a musician. I got, I got the team. I mentioned if the Red Hat Chili Peppers never got to the bridge.
Starting point is 01:04:40 Boy, their careers would have been very different. But you're saying they don't have a sick chorus? Never anyway, so what you were a musician and then what happened? I was a musician I got a lot of in a lot of trouble in Canada So I packed up my truck waiting. I was on the Canadian border and this dog got up in my crotch where my purse was and found my gummies and said not allowed. Oh, I thought you said not allowed like he said something but not allowed. So it was like, yeah, you sort of went nonverbal and I thought I said being the dog made eyes and I went, I know what I got to do.
Starting point is 01:05:18 And I guess what you meant. Yeah, I got my truck and I drove Canada. Was this in Manitoba by chance? I've been as matter of fact it was oh beautiful city I tried to get a snake from you guys and I never heard anything well You know what on the snakes that I took to Manitoba on that trip they were for a client So I didn't have any snakes to spare I didn't have any spare snake. Yeah, who was the client? Do you mind me asking someone famous? It was it well, okay famous Canadian? It was a famous Canadian I may ask you someone famous. It was a well. Okay famous Canadian. It was a famous Canadian. Oh,
Starting point is 01:05:49 Who are we talking? There's Mike Myers. Oh my gosh. You were carrying me. He's her in Canada. We made him talk to us in character. Yeah, which character? The love guru. Oh, our favorite The funniest one. I don't think that's held up. That's awesome. I mean it's great for you. It's your favorite. We loved it We love it. Was mean, it's great for you. It's your favorite. We loved it. And was he will it? He kind of went through a couple. He went through, he was the love guru then he was fat bastard. And then he was his dad from, so I married an ex-merderer.
Starting point is 01:06:12 We're talking about way too many things. We can't talk about. But he really put on a show for us. Wow, incredible. Yeah. But you never got your snake. That's too bad. I'm so sorry.
Starting point is 01:06:21 No, I never got my snake right now. But now you're here. It's good to be here. Were you always interested in brewing? You know, I just like, I think, I think beers like this gorgeous art form, I think that you can learn a lot about people through their, through their brews.
Starting point is 01:06:32 I think, you know, what happens when you, what happens when you're drinking, you learn a lot about people. So, you know, Yeah, I say that that your true feelings come out when you're drinking, right? Yeah, and I feel like when I'm a little bit lit, that's when truth comes out a drunk man's words are a sober man snakes. Oh, is that okay? Yeah, we said we sell that in our merch store Yeah, have you sold any no no, we sell them though, okay good and so are you drunk right now by the way? I mean
Starting point is 01:07:01 What time is it even? Well, look it's hard not to day drink during the summer because it's like, that's exactly right. I'm just gonna wait until 845 to start drinking. Come on. No. And when I'm brushing my teeth and I'm having that list of in, who knows? I mean, not my fault if I swallowed it.
Starting point is 01:07:15 Yeah. Oh, wait, are you drunk on list of in right now? No. No, you are. Scott. Uh-oh. I think she's going to be a little drunk. Gone off that list of in.
Starting point is 01:07:23 That's all right. There's no, I mean, look, this is a work, it's my workplace, but it's not your workplace. You can show up in any state you want. And I live on a houseboat. So that's, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not driving the view. So you don't have a floor. That's true.
Starting point is 01:07:35 I don't have a floor. And evidently kind of floating. Yeah. I kind of find myself floating pretty often. Must be nice. Yeah. It's a way you like it. You would.
Starting point is 01:07:45 So you're on a houseboat. You have a lot of wheels on your business. Is it a successful business? Not yet. What? I think we're just trying to nail the marketing down. We just got, I just got a Reddit. I don't know if you heard about that.
Starting point is 01:08:03 Did I hear about you getting a Reddit? No, just Reddit in general. I believe I've heard a Reddit. I don't know if you heard about that. Did I hear about you getting a Reddit? No, just Reddit in general. I believe I've heard of it. That's where the world's angriest people go to congregate. Yeah, I was wondering why my client tells Piss all the time, but I just put up an ad there, just a picture of me holding the brew. Oh, how did it do? Not so great.
Starting point is 01:08:19 I didn't put the address or nothing, but I just said, come find me. Oh, I don't know. That's very dangerous. That's hard for people to guess. You know what I do on Reddit as well, like a woman just come find me. I'm holding hope. Has anyone found you yet?
Starting point is 01:08:34 I actually, yeah. Because I'll get it. What do they do to you when I just found you? They just look the body of water behind me. They were like, oh, I know those cross coordinates. The Venice canals. Oh, the Venice, oh, the Venice, California. And they came and found you.
Starting point is 01:08:46 And they came and found me. I gave and I gave them a, which one I gave them? I gave them a hunchback and ultra bombed. That's a solid one. That's a German IPA. Um, it's, uh, it's liquid, killbasa and a little bit of hops, uh, nutmeg and turmeric and turmeric, and fermented. Oh, just fermented.
Starting point is 01:09:10 It was all fermented. Everything is fermented. Yeah, that's correct. Yeah. Do you know a weed dealer named bro? I think you'd go through. I do. Do you really?
Starting point is 01:09:17 I do, I just got some stinky leg from them. Oh good. Well, I, how do people, I mean, obviously, you're not very good at marketing. How do people, are you, are you, obviously, you have the first, not the first, but the brewery with the most wheels? Are you going out there to the people trying to get the beer to them? Or yeah, I'm, I'm taking my longboard out. I'm, I'm throwing beers out on the boardwalk. Um, I, which I got in a little bit of trouble for. I hit someone in the head that way. But I'm, I'm trying to spread the words, but I can't, I'm throwing beers out on the boardwalk, which I got in a little bit of trouble before I hit someone in the head that way.
Starting point is 01:09:45 But I'm trying to spread the words much, I can, I'm going off doing stuff like this, your media engagements, just trying to really spread the good Lord's word. And you should do Ellie show. Yeah, you should do. I would love it if you came on time with a lot of beer.
Starting point is 01:09:58 I don't know. Oh. You don't know. No, I can't. No, no, no, I'm kidding. I love four thousand listeners. Yeah, four thousand listeners. I'm just, I'm trying to hit the like eight to 10k demographic. Oh
Starting point is 01:10:08 That's a demographic of it. It's a What is the demographic she's going for? I'm trying to hit that eight to 10k You're talking that's a noun of people. That's correct. Okay. Oh, she wants that demographic Yeah, but no, I would definitely I could definitely at least drop off a couple brews. That's correct. Okay. Oh, so she wants that demographic. What? Yeah, I think. But no, I would definitely, I could definitely at least drop off a couple of brews. You could do some reviews. Oh, sure.
Starting point is 01:10:30 And some brews. We don't know if that's not really our strategy. Oh, but it could be. It could be our strategy. Yeah, yeah, during a strike. I'm happy to get a brief free right now. I'll ask you a couple of questions. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:38 Yeah, sure, sure. Is your birthday between February and March? Uh, it's not. Okay. I mean, if you're talking February of one year in March of 2020. Oh yeah, one or the year. I have not.
Starting point is 01:10:48 Oh, okay. The February March of same year, of the same year. That's correct. It's not. No. Have you ever had St.Gria? I had a, I've had it. I've had St.Gria.
Starting point is 01:10:57 Awesome. Who is your ex's name? Who is my, did I just pick one? Yeah. Oh, you've had more than one? I've had more than one X. Oh. Well, I think you know, I did.
Starting point is 01:11:07 What did it? Sounds like watching the snakes, I tell you what. Oh, that's fun, guys. You're, are you still at a two right now? Yeah. I just bumped up to three. Okay. Wow.
Starting point is 01:11:18 If he gets to four, he's going to be proud of you. No. No problem. Yeah, well, I mentioned I'm 43 years old. You know, I've lived a while. old. You know I've lived a while I've had to access for 11 years 11 years 10 11 years and I you know I I one of my exes was named. I don't know Andrew Andrew Andrew okay pick a number between four and seven I guess I'll do sick with that's the raw one
Starting point is 01:11:43 Shit I can't unfortunately I can't pick a pick the wrong You can't pick out a flavor for me because I guess the right nodding Oh, sorry, but here's a pelagrino. Oh, why look all right. I am thirsty That doesn't look like a standard issue pelagrino. No, no, that one. I'm that that I made in the basement. Oh No, you can't call it a pelet. No, you can't call it a pellet It's a carbonation is Carbonation is you burping into the oh no
Starting point is 01:12:14 Sorry, I'm going through You're going through a hard time. I should have given you the burp stuff. I'm sorry for that You don't have to drink it stop trying giving you the burp stuff. I'm sorry for that. Should I not drink this? You don't have to drink it. Stop trying to drink it. I'm not drinking. Don't drink it. It's creepy. You're creeping up towards your lips right now.
Starting point is 01:12:28 I have my head that it's a pela grino and I got my, my taste buds. I'm shocked. Do you think it's a pela grino because it's a post it that sells pela grino on it? Well, no. You introduced it as a pela grino. Part of my brain said you're about to have a pela grino. You know what?
Starting point is 01:12:41 You should just drink it. The label says, The label says, Well, you made this by burping into it. Why don't you just try it out for side? Well, you made this by burping into it? I don't want to talk about it. Yes. All right, I'm having a sip.
Starting point is 01:12:49 The label says, Pelagrino, don't. What's going on with you personally? Why are you having such a hard time? I had a misconnection. Oh, oh, shit. Someone came in. I felt like there were vibes
Starting point is 01:13:01 were freaking unexplainable, insane off the charts. And then on on and then they left and I didn't get any information. Oh, well, do you, I mean, sometimes if you describe the person what happened, I call the Ellie times, I told them it's in the, they don't do the disconnections thing. I know that you were just angling for a headline? Yeah, they said stop calling. Okay, well let's do it here on. If you want to say something to this person, go ahead.
Starting point is 01:13:28 Okay, this person was between five, five, and six feet. We could have been wearing a hat. It could have been. Had a shirt on. That was either three-quarter sleeves, a turtleneck, or a tank top. It could have been a beard or a pigtails. And their personality was either really serious or really fine. I had it could have been a beard or pigtails. And their personality was either really serious
Starting point is 01:13:48 or really funny. Shoot, that's hard. That could be, that could be almost anybody. Dang. That could be almost any snake too. Oh my God, it was a snake. Oh, we do, we do. It was a really, and remembering that
Starting point is 01:14:02 was a really big snake on roller skates. A really big snake on roller skates. That's how about marker Rodrigo That sounds more like it could be Mark or Rodrigo That was a thing. How tall would you say it was but five and six? It could have been between five and six five That's Rodrigo. He stretches. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, right would you tell him something? Yeah, we can pass some message We can try to tell him hey That's all that you just gotta be a better message than just hey. Wait, what did I say?
Starting point is 01:14:31 I'm freaking out. Your phone number or something? Just we can say I really like to and I want to continue the conversation. Something that's, could you say, hey, got nothing to do? I'm driving down. No one will learn.
Starting point is 01:14:44 I don't know. I'm sensing saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I'm just saying, the water. Yeah, and I just say come find me. Send them the reddit. I get you're actual personal information. Yeah, do you have it? I just talked to Rodrigo. He would like to be left alone.
Starting point is 01:15:11 Oh, he said, oh, that one. I would like to be left alone. Oh, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. He said, he's not necessarily your fault. Rodrigo is just really in his own bag right now. He's just like really focused on himself. He's on his hoe error.
Starting point is 01:15:24 Yeah. Yeah, he did say error, right? Yeah, yeah. Yeah, he did say he was hoe down or go home. Yeah, it's thick voice summer, and that's what he keeps saying. He's just kind of trying to get it out there. Yeah, yeah, shoot. Yeah, and I'm looking for strictly marriage vibes, so I'm not looking at all.
Starting point is 01:15:36 You and Rodriguez are not compatible. No, he cannot be tied down. Yeah. I call myself a 60-piscopillian. No. Why do you call yourself that? Because I'm doing a sexy, you piss-capeleian. No. Why do you call yourself? Because I'm doing faith the raw dog way. Oh.
Starting point is 01:15:50 So you are religious, but you're having unprotected sex. That's right. That's right. That's what I mean. Hey, that's cool. You know, I mean, that's cool. That's cool, that's cool. I'm hitting up church, but I'm also getting hit,
Starting point is 01:16:03 hitting it in the back seat after. So you go to church and then have anal sex afterwards. You know, okay. If I came to your establishment enough, would you eventually name a drink after me? Oh, 100, 100, 100, how many times would I have to show up and be like a man? No less than three, no more than one. Okay. And what would you want to be naming it Be like a real lesson three, no more than one. Okay. And what would you want to be naming it?
Starting point is 01:16:27 I'd name it. I'd name it. What's your name? It's gunk. It's gunk. Gunk little. We could get the gunk skunk. It's got notes of sativa.
Starting point is 01:16:37 Nice. This is just the weird beer. It's just like a weed beer. But how did you know how you didn't even ask him the questions? Oh, okay, hey look me in the eye. Uh-huh. What am I thinking? Oh You're thinking about you're thinking about a parallel world Yeah, stop with the custopia. No, you're thinking you're thinking I Know what you're thinking. I've seen that look before in this. You look like you're looking out of a window.
Starting point is 01:17:06 You got a broken heart. I'm thinking about Rodrigo. I see what you're looking at. I'm sorry. Well, you want to try this Peligrino? It's a real one this time. X. You hear those bubbles?
Starting point is 01:17:19 Two. Why do you get, why do you get a real one? Dang. Shoot. That's nice. That's just a regular peligrino. That's a peligrino'd he get a real one? Dang. Shoot. That's nice. That's just a regular pelagreen. That's a pelagreen, yes. I don't want to, I don't want,
Starting point is 01:17:29 a lot of our beers are recalled. I don't want to get you sick. You feel like a homie. The truth is a lot of my beers are really dangerous and I just wouldn't want to put you guys in your arms away. It makes you a real one, man. We can get glonkeys sometime.
Starting point is 01:17:39 I love get glonkeys. Oh no, when you get glonkeys, it gets all twisted. Ronnier, you get jealous right now. I'm getting a little jealous. I don't want to get glonky. Oh, no, when you get glonky, it gets all twisted. Ronnier, you get jealous right now. I'm getting a little jealous. I don't want to get glonky too. I don't know the nature of your relationship, but this seems like it's a white striped situation. The tension's good. I'll tell you what. How'd you like to meet me outside of the John Bon Jovi Piscopal Church on Sunday at 1 p.m.? I'll call it 12.30.
Starting point is 01:18:05 All right, because I only have sex after church. Oh, dang. You wanted to do it during? Yeah, it's more it's more naughty that way. Yeah, I could I could I mean, if I can clear my schedule, a good way for you to say, I'd love I'd love to do a little bit of love in my own. And then if you guys enjoy it and you want to go on a second date,
Starting point is 01:18:22 we'll pay for it. Come here. Seriously? Yeah. Yeah. Like like the show baggage. If we do well here, we get per do you do that on. Yeah. You pay for the first day.
Starting point is 01:18:33 We don't pay for. Oh, you're right. They pay for a dating profile. How much money? Come here. Bing, Bing, Bing giving us. Well, why? Where are you guys going?
Starting point is 01:18:40 I mean, I will assume your tastes are pretty. Yeah. What is red bear? What's the, what's the price on comedy dang dang? What are we going to be going for comedy dang dang? And can I, can I come or am I just not part of it? It seems like you're not, I don't think you're part of this. Right.
Starting point is 01:18:57 I'm just, I'm back. I'm at a one now. I'm just going to tell you right now. I went down. I'm sorry, right. I feel like Gunk needs to spread his wings. I can be my own thing. We can still...
Starting point is 01:19:10 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm not mad at you. I'm just jealous as all I want you to. We could go to one of those medieval, like where the horses are doing, like where the show... Those are struck right now. They are. They're all struck right now. But it sounds like you really want to go.
Starting point is 01:19:23 So look, we'll pay for that. That's him. You'll pay for that the second time they go. The second time. Yeah, we'll do it the first time. We have to do one on our own. You know, come on on your own. So I know you're saying,
Starting point is 01:19:33 I'll equal or lesser value. Yeah, that's the best. Applebee's date one, no boo, date two. Sounds good. Okay. Wow, it seems like we've got a big, big, big snake love connection. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:44 Just a normal two human scene if it's okay. And you know, you have date snakes. Come on Scott, you know I fuck snakes. Oh, no. Oh, God. Shaman, do you have any change or no? You know, I'm checking in with myself. No, still pre-sac.
Starting point is 01:19:56 I mean, you were gonna date Rodrigo who's a snake. Who's a snake? Yeah, I fuck snakes. I mean, I fuck people who bestab me in the back. Oh, yeah. Oh, you definitely should have clarified that. Because you work with snakes species. I mean, do fuck people who bestab me in the back. Oh, you definitely should have clarified that. Yeah, because you work with snakes. I realize how that, yeah, I mean,
Starting point is 01:20:10 probably get gave a really visceral image. And I think we can all relate to that. Wise words, thank you so much. Dang, Ronnie. Yeah. I think we all know what he's talking about. Look guys, we're running out of time. I'm so sorry to say, we are running out of time.
Starting point is 01:20:29 But we do have time for one final feature, and that is, of course, a little something called plug. Yes. I'm gonna fuck you on a stickin' into me. You gotta fuck you on a stickin' into me. You gotta move it y'all up, I guess no I don't. And swear to gently enter my recipe call. Hey, that was receptacle by Ralph Vitamin. Thank you so much to Ralph Vitamin.
Starting point is 01:20:52 If you have a plug theme or a closing of the plug bag theme, head over to CBBWorld.com slash plugs. And you can be famous for a week and Ralph Vitamin, you are famous for a week. And let's plug it up. Ellie, what do you have to plug here? Let's. I have to plug my podcast called Born to Love is brought to you by Will Ferrell's big money players. You can find it on the I Heart Radio app.
Starting point is 01:21:13 And you're also just wherever you get. You're wherever you get. Yeah, you don't have to download an app or anything. No, you don't have to do anything. They like you too because then they get all your private information and then they can follow you wherever you go. Sickos over there just like just look at all these names just
Starting point is 01:21:27 just pick and your book as well what was it my squirrel days my collection of personal essays by me Ellie Kemper that's right and so Ronnie and gump what do you guys want to plug careful okay well yeah we we actually we were interviewed on when does it when does this come out? I don't know like we can have okay great So we were interviewed on this podcast called expo expo Z we were at a reptile expo reptile super show down at the Monex and our snakes and people and business with boomin We are interviewed by this this young man Jacob, why socky and
Starting point is 01:22:03 We were interviewed by this young man, Jacob Wysocki, and this is fine compatriot man, Appadatta. That's right. And we just, we had a nice time in that show. And I guess they went to all sorts of other expos in Southern California. They went to an anime expo, they went to a tattoo expo, they went to a boat show. Yeah, and they made a podcast about it that's coming out
Starting point is 01:22:19 on August 11th, and it's going to run for four weeks in the year-old Presents Feed. So we hope you check it out. It's a fun time. It's talking to people. Expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, expo, and you anticipated. Yeah. And Brett, what do you want to plug here? I've got a, well, I guess depends on when this is out. I've got to take a take a wild stab.
Starting point is 01:22:52 All right. I'll get 17th, Elysian theater, me and Lily Sullivan are you doing a new Brett? Yeah, me, me Brett and Lily Sullivan. I'm gonna be hoistin' bruised out into the crowd. So probably bring a net or a shield and Lily Sullivan's gonna'm gonna be hoistin' bruised out into the crowd. So probably bring a net or a shield. And Lily Sullivan's gonna be making people laugh. So come on out 9.30 PM.
Starting point is 01:23:11 All right, wonderful. I wanna plug, God, what can I plug? I can plug the book, comedy bang, bang, book. It's out there. We're in, I think the fourth printing now, maybe fifth or something like that. Did really well, but I believe we're going to have more autograph copies coming up towards the end of the year.
Starting point is 01:23:30 So if you were hoping to get an autograph copy, keep checking CBBWorld.com slash book and you can get one of those. And while you're at CBB World, we have so many great shows over there. We have Scott hasn't seen where we just watched things like Casper. And we also have a CBB Presents, which Kushitopia apparently is going to be coming to, I don't know. Can't wait. We have College Town. We have so many great things over there as well as all the archives of this episode, all the live episodes, and at free episodes. So head on over there to CBBWorld.com.
Starting point is 01:24:09 If you're only listening to Comedy BamBank, and you're only getting half the story, all right, let's close up the old plug-bass. Do it, bud. But but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but but Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Oh no. Oh my God. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh my God. Oh my God.
Starting point is 01:24:50 Dang. She was open the butt bag. Okay, we get it. And this is here I go. Here's my attempt by Gustav Blumbalatzinari not Zapatin Hoffner. Thank you so much to them for that wonderful closing of the plug, big name. Guys, I wanna thank you so much,
Starting point is 01:25:07 Ellie, always a pleasure to have you. Always a pleasure to be there. When I say, always, I mean, this is your first time. I hope you'll come back until the strike. Oh, is it not, the invitation is an open after. I mean, you would have to come up with like another big Hollywood project after that, but. Yeah, okay. Yeah, you got something in the works
Starting point is 01:25:26 I'm sure you all start thinking yeah, I mean to come back if let that be motivation for you to come up with a new big hit show And Ronnie and gunk It's been a pleasure being on comedy dang dang thank you so much for having us. We had the top of our lives here Did you really? And I know that we started off, you know, on top of terms, but you kept calling me point Dexter. Well, yes. That's growth, Ronnie. I'm proud of you for that growth. I did. Thank you so much. And you know, I just think we all, we all just did beautifully today. Okay, wonderful. And then, of course, Brett, so great to have you on the show and
Starting point is 01:25:59 I'll never forget, I'll never forget this. I hope not because this is where you met Gunk over here too. I'll never forget this as long as I live. How long do you think you're gonna live? Probably no more than five years I hope I don't forget this until dang, you know, at least six years from now, so thanks guys Yeah, great to have you and uh, have you been setting up plans during the plugs for the date or where you guys do you think you're gonna go? Because I'm paying for the second one, so I wanna make sure that.
Starting point is 01:26:25 Probably bouquet of bet first. Yeah, we'll get a full family platter of bouquet of bet, though. Probably, and we'll probably have a skinny that makes, if we go, till our lips touch. I'd be gliding in the trap. And I'm gonna hide a snake. Don't plug that strike. The noodle will be a snake.
Starting point is 01:26:40 Oh, I love it. I like that. Did you bring these snakes with you today, by the way? Yeah, I got a little tiny snake for you and your little tiny hog. I'll go see you next time. Thanks, bye. Hear us!

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