Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 158 -Your Greedy, Greedy Boobs
Episode Date: July 2, 2018The boys return with another look into the important issues affecting Jesse's airport travel. Did you know he's carrying and explosive device in his pants? Also Crendor has some complaints about game ...shows and Jesse discovers that one of his "idols" is doing AMAZING things. All this and more on the newest episode of Cox n' Crendor! Thanks to Hims for sponsoring this episode. To start your month trial for just $5 visit http://forhims.com/cox Thanks to MeUndies for sponsoring this episode. Get 20% off your first pair at http://meundies.com/crendor
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Today's episode is brought to you by MeUndies.
You know we talk about them on this show all the time.
That's because we love them and wear them.
And I have so many MeUndies.
Some might say too many, but I will say not enough.
Not enough.
I have...
I just got an American flag, MeUndies.
I have the American flag proudly on my butt and or junk at any given time.
I salute you.
Thank you.
You wouldn't be the first to salute my junk.
We have to talk about that when we get into the actual podcast.
And then we're also sponsored by 4Hims.
Again, people be losing their hair.
But you don't have to.
Thanks to science, baldness can be optional.
We're going to talk about that as well. But let's jump right into the podcast. You don't have to. Thanks to science, baldness can be optional. Yes.
We're going to talk about that as well.
But let's jump right into the podcast.
Hello, everybody.
It's time for Cows and Cren-Dogs.
This is Cren-Dog in the morning.
In the morning.
Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live.
In 4-hour recording studio.
Recorded. Hello everybody and welcome back to another exciting episode of Cox and Crandor in the Morning.
Hello everyone, welcome back to Cox and Crandor in the morning here on K4554554545 radio.
That's not real. That's not real. K455455455 radio is not real.
Repeat it.
K45545455 is not real.
What do you know?
It's not.
You goober.
Of course it's not real.
I've been thinking we've been broadcasting all along.
No, this isn't live.
None of this is live.
All your goofs I just edit out.
And it's literally 30 minutes of just me talking to myself.
Wow.
How this podcast has changed.
Yeah, I don't know if you've ever actually listened to this podcast.
But, yeah, no, it's just me now.
It's just me.
Wasn't there that one time where it was my podcast and I talked like five minutes straight?
Because you were like, I don't know if you could do it.
And then I did it.
And you did.
You really did.
The Crencast.
And it definitely was a thing
the crinicast was a thing yeah i thought that was a pretty good one honestly it was it was pretty
good i all right before i forget because it's on my mind okay let me tell you about my life on
planes remember i was saying people salute my junk right on when i get on airplanes six times over the last course of the year i've gone through
that large scan detector thing and every time it pops up that there's something on my junk every
every time without fail it'll just pop up and i'll go stand there and they'll be like sir okay
they all look really depressed like they don't want to have to do it Like sir we're gonna have to
Like a metal plate in your gym
No I don't know what it is
I can't tell you what it is
Every time it happens
I don't know if it's maybe the zipper on my pants
I have no clue
I don't know
But they're all like sir
We're gonna have to search your crotch region
There's potentially explosive material there.
And I'm just like, yeah, there is.
And they keep saying stuff like, you know, potential hazardous weapon or, you know, all the fun, good jokes that are there.
Right.
And they're like, would you like to do some private or here?
And I'm so used to it now.
I'm just like, just get it over with with which makes them even more uncomfortable because then in front
of all their friends they have to rub my dick and so they're literally just like okay i'm gonna use
the back of my hands and pat you down oh if you please step forward i'm gonna go on the inside of
your leg and pat up and then i'm gonna go around the buttocks region and pat down and i'm just like
okay do what you gotta do and i just stand stand there, like, my arms out, like,
looking at people as they walk by.
And everyone smiles when
they look at me like it's hilarious.
I'm like, this is
incredibly awkward for everyone involved,
but I don't care anymore.
I'm just like, whatever, sure, pat me down.
And the last guy I had,
what,
what a sweet pea that guy was.
He was like every really awkward old man you've ever met ever.
Mm-hmm.
And he was just like, okay, so what I got to do is I got to pat down your crotch,
but I'm going to use the back of my hand, okay?
I'm not going to grab.
I'm going to use the back of my hand.
I was like, do what you got to do, man. He's like, I'm not gonna grab i'm gonna use the back of my hand i was like do what you
gotta do man he's like i'm not gonna do what i gotta do i'm gonna help you get through the line
son i was like okay sure and he like went down there and he was like he was shaking the entire
time i couldn't tell if that was because he was old or because he was like you know scared to be
next to my ding dong i don't know what was going on, but it was genuinely fun. I'll be patting you with the back of my hand
and me with the front of my hand.
I love that that's what they have to say.
It's like, sir, every time I'm like, sir,
I'm going to pat you down with the back of my hand.
It's like, yeah, I get it.
You're not trying to grab my dick.
I don't think you are.
I don't think anyone here is trying to grab my wiener.
It's never crossed my mind.
And if you are, you know what? I'm all right i'll take a i'll take a little wrist before it takes i'm a
wrist before i take off sure yeah i got a in-depth news analysis right i don't want to leave the
story here where does this only happen at lax or has it happened at multiple airports oh it only
happens at lax flying out at lax. It's only ever happened at LAX.
It happens, it doesn't matter what the airline is.
Although I've mostly flown recently Delta.
So maybe it's that terminal's machine.
I don't know.
It's gotta be.
But yeah, it's only, it's happened once before, maybe two years ago.
But in the last year it has happened with a high frequency.
It does not phase me.
It doesn't phase me at all.
I'm used to it, and I feel bad
because there's always the staff members who are looking
around, and there's just like,
who wants to do this?
Who wants to be the one to check this guy's junk?
And I'm looking at him like, you can just
let me through. And they're like, nope, gotta
do it. So it's always, they always send like the lowest man in the totem pole, which usually is the awkward, weird guy.
So I got this, and they're always like, okay, I'm gonna rub your inner thigh.
Okay, I'm used to this.
I know you're trying to look for a bomb.
I get it.
I don't have one.
Go nuts.
There's a lot of innuendos there.
But, like, you know, I don't understand why they get so worked up over it.
It's not a big deal for me.
But, you know, they do.
They do.
They're doing their job.
Feel my MeUndies.
That's true.
Often they're like, it's almost like you're wearing nothing.
And I'm like, I know.
They're MeUndies.
And you're like, you could go to our MeUndies.com link. And they're like, sir's almost like you're wearing nothing. And I'm like, I know, they're MeUndies. And you're like, you could go to our MeUndies.com link.
And they're like, sir, can you be quiet?
Yeah, yeah, that's for later in the show, sir.
You're not supposed to do that right now.
Sorry, sorry.
Okay, all right.
Yeah, sorry, sorry.
Yeah, every time.
It happens without fail.
Maybe the trick is to not fly Delta.
I mean, if I didn't hate american and united
i probably would yeah virgin america which is now alaskan airlines uh doesn't fly a lot of places
oh yeah and so my options are take one of the three major airlines and United is crappy
and American is some of the
worst service I've ever had.
So Delta is all I got.
It's the only one I can tolerate.
And even they're not good.
You're not wrong.
But...
I'm aware.
I've never had that happen, but I'm also not really a threatful person.
I'm just like a really skinny white guy that's like, greetings, friends.
Also, your junk isn't a lethal weapon.
That's true.
I mean, you know, I have to protect my package because it could be loaded.
Yeah.
And they just notice it, and they're like, the machine notices it, and beep, beep, beep. Yeah, the machine. Even machines are turned on by my explosive package.
Yeah.
It's the eighth world wonder.
All right.
Let's get off this.
Let's get off.
You want to get off my junk?
So does everyone else.
Apparently not the airport.
I was going to bring up something.
Sure.
Because I was looking through TV. And I was seeing game bring up something because I was looking through
TV and I was seeing game
shows right
there's the thing
game shows feel like they're outdated now
and I don't know
why I felt that way but it just feels like they're outdated
maybe because it's just TV's outdated
in general
maybe I mean I have that vibe
too every time I'm in the UK and I watch game
shows, even they feel outdated,
but their game shows are always light years ahead
of ours. Yeah.
And even they feel outdated theirs.
Yeah. But they did
feel outdated. What game shows were you watching?
What inspired you to
think that it was outdated? They had Family Feud
on, which
I actually think Family Feud on, which I actually think
Family Feud's one of the better game shows.
It's mainly just,
it's kind of like a
more competitive Family Jeopardy
or something.
It's like a Jackbox Party game.
Yeah, it's like a Jackbox Party game.
It is what it is.
Like, damn something,
and they're like,
is it a Microsoft Word?
And they're like, yeah,
number one answer. And then, who's the host Word? And they're like, yeah, number one answer.
And then...
Who's the host now?
Is that Steve Harvey?
I think it is Steve Harvey.
I was about to say D.L. Hughley, but I know that's not him.
He's one of the many kings of comedy, I'm sure.
Well, it used to be, what's his name, Anderson.
Yes, Louis Anderson.
And then Louis Anderson got on
That TV show and won like awards for it
What a crazy career
He had
Remember Life with Louis or whatever that show
Oh yeah I forgot about that
Then he went to this show
He went on Family Feud
And now he's on
Whatever that show is that's on
FX that he won awards for.
Baskets?
Yes, that's what it is.
Oh, yeah.
I think I saw an ad for that or whatever.
Yeah.
People love him for that now, which is crazy to me.
Yeah, look at that.
Louie, killing it.
Yeah, it was like there's Price is Right still on.
I used to like Price is Right when I was a kid.
Yes, yes, same.
It feels like, okay, who even hosts the Price is Right?
Price is Right.
Drew Carey hosts the new, like, I haven't watched the Price is Right since it was Bob Barker.
I couldn't tell you.
I haven't watched one Drew Carey episode of Price is Right.
I haven't either.
And I think.
I remember Barker's beauties.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, like he was the staple of that show.
Yeah, get your pet spayed and neutered.
I remember all of it.
2007 is when Drew Carey took over.
Damn, 11 years ago.
That's also when I started teaching
so I definitely
wouldn't have watched it
because it was on during the day.
That makes sense that I would have missed that.
I guess they keep going because all the old people keep watching because they're home during the day. Yeah. That makes sense. That makes sense that I would have missed that. I guess they keep going because all the old people keep watching
because they're home during the day.
But the young people also show up.
They're the ones who are like, I want to get that car.
They're just trying to win shit.
Yeah.
And then Jeopardy, that's like just a quiz show.
I wonder how they've updated the games because when I watched it,
even in the early 2000s, the games looked like they were from the 70s.
Everything looked like it was old as shit.
So I wonder if they've updated it.
They must have.
It's like Wheel of Fortune.
Wheel of Fortune still kind of looks
like it's from the 70s.
Wheel of Fortune, I
hate that game. I hate that.
Jeopardy's fun because
I don't know anything, so I always learn something.
Yeah.
And I feel like I'm learning a thing.
The Wheel of Fortune, I just don't.
Wait, what?
So you have to do vows?
And what are you having to do?
You have to spend money?
And the thing is, the Wheel of Fortune, I feel like they've run out of things to say.
They're just like, all right, what do we got here?
And it's like, uh,
basketball dribbled
forward. It's just a full
phrase and it's like, what a dumb phrase.
If I put in Wheel of Fortune, I got
mythological hero Achilles.
Like, that's one of them.
Yeah, nope. It's dumb.
That's terrible. Like, just put Achilles.
But they can't because then they're going to figure it out too fast.
Or you'll spend forever just trying to get letters or whatever.
Meanwhile, in the UK, they have shows like The Chase, which is, as far as I remember,
The Chase is a show where, imagine you and a bunch of other contestants are working together to get points and money, right?
Okay.
But then there's usually, as far as I'm aware, I'm sure there are other people, but it's usually this angry looking older, like, heavyset woman who is, I don't know if she's the nanny or the nurse or the frow line.
She has a name.
Right.
She has a name. And. She has a name.
And she straight up shakes his people down.
Basically, the point is they answer questions at the end.
And then this woman answers the same questions.
But if she can get it done faster, they don't win anything.
And so she's super smart.
And it's fascinating because then she shit talks him the whole time.
She's like, you think you're smart, but you're dummies.
Big old dummies.
Oh, man.
I don't remember what the lady's name is, but she's great.
I love her.
You know what?
Google the chase and go to images and you'll see her.
She's on there.
She's great.
She looks like someone who runs a boarding school.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, she does. Yeah. She's great. She looks like someone who runs a boarding school. Oh, yeah.
Yeah, she does.
Yeah.
I like her.
She's like, you'll never defeat me, you scallywags.
She's wonderful.
But they have shows like that, and they have shows like, oh, my God,
what's the name of the one, The Cube?
The Cube.
That show's insane. Oh, yes Oh yes it is just a big ass cube
Yeah and what happens
In the cube they give you a certain number of chances
To do stuff
And like you
It'll be like okay
In the cube you have to do this
And you can if you want to go back in the cube
There's another object
It's literally
Who wants to be a millionaire
But instead of answering questions
You're taking on
Physical challenges
And activities
Huh
That's kind of cool
I like that
Yeah
Yeah
See they have like
Fun game shows
They even have that one
Where people
Choose a date
Based on someone's dick
Oh yeah
I remember that
Right
They have good game shows
Yeah But even those you're like
these are kind of dumb yeah even those even the like most innovative if you can call innovative
just yeah making people naked and judging them uh they'd just be like i like those boobs and
they're like well you're moving on to the next round. Even then, it's like, yeah, it just feels kind of outdated.
I don't know.
Maybe Japan.
Japan's the ultimate game show.
Japan game show.
You know what?
You're absolutely right.
There was American game shows, which kind of felt old.
UK game shows, which are pushing the limits,
but also kind of feel like they're stuck in their ways.
Japan.
I didn't even think about Japan.
Yeah.
Japanese game shows
that's where it's really at they're cutting edge they are cutting edge 14 craziest japanese game
shows actually i'll read some of these on like our news segment thing those are good news segments
craziest japanese yeah all right whoa 11 weirdest japanese game shows that actually exist That's a YouTube video There's actually many of them
And I'm not
Some of them are terrifying
Yes
You know what's that other show
I've been watching
Is America's Got Talent
And here's the thing
I tweet about this
I don't watch the entire show.
I watch the first five to six weeks
where they just go around and try to find the people
to move on to the next round.
And then once they're like, let's begin the second round,
I stop watching.
Okay, yeah.
Because I don't care about the actual talented people.
I want to see the dumb people, the bad acts,
the people that are like,
they're like, you sound like a dying yodeler and they're like
that's the best part and then i'm like all right well i don't care about this show anymore
i've done that for years i get that i genuinely get that i don't even back when american idol
was still a thing that i watched right i would only watch it for the terrible people at the beginning,
and then I wouldn't watch the rest.
Like, I don't care who the best singer is.
I want to see, what was that kid's name?
The one guy who could not sing at all?
Sanjaya or whatever his name was?
Oh, yeah.
What was his name?
I love that dude.
I wanted to see more of him.
I would have watched him.
Or the one, Eddie something.
There was a guy with pants on the ground.
It was Eddie Huang.
Was that his name?
No, Eddie Huang is a chef.
William Hung.
Eddie Huang, William Hung.
Jesse's now a racist.
That's not.
I know Eddie Huang.
That's a different guy.
He's a restaurant dude and he's awesome.
But yes, William Hung.
Oh, yeah, he was like, she bangs.
She bangs.
That was my favorite guy.
I like the pants on your ground guy.
He's like, pants on your ground.
Pants on the ground.
Looking like a fool with your pants on the ground.
Yes, that's what I'm talking about.
Those are the people that are genuinely fun.
Yeah.
I love those people.
Also, can we talk about how...
Whoa.
Whoa.
What?
Can we talk about how...
I looked up William Hung.
Wanted to see how he was doing.
The first thing that pops up is a photo of him with about a million dollars in poker chips.
Hold on.
What is this?
To millions of Americans, Hung is instantly recognizable as the Shebangs guy.
Yes, we know.
In 2014, he has over $30,000 in cashes since 2014, including a win at a nightly Aria $100 tournament.
Yeah, basically, according to this article, he just goes around and gambles now.
What?
Well.
Okay.
I mean, awesome, I guess. That's's crazy he stayed in the music for a while i guess he made a lot of money from it he probably made more money than the
person that won i mean let's be real probably american idol i couldn't tell you who i couldn't
tell you who won after kelly clarkson I don't remember any of those people. Oh, you know. Carrie Underwood was one.
Carrie Underwood was one?
Yeah.
When was Reuben Studdard?
I think he was the next year, wasn't he?
Was he?
No, did he win?
I don't even know if he won.
What about?
Let's see.
Yeah, I don't remember.
I remember from Kelly to Justin was a thing.
Yeah, I remember that too.
I remember that was a thing. Yeah, let remember that too. I remember that was a thing.
Yeah, let's see.
We got a...
Can I just tell you for the record?
Yeah.
When you go through image searches of William Hung,
he has so many photos.
If you typed in Jesse Cox, you would not see as many.
This man is genuinely transcendent reality.
I wish I could go and find photos of myself like this on the internet.
Damn.
It doesn't even happen.
Wow.
William Hung is killing it.
Is American Idol still a show?
I think so.
Shut up.
Shut up.
What?
William Hung.
May 16th, 2018. 20th Century Fox invites you to Deadpool
karaoke with William hung what Wow Wow are you kidding me I'm on his Twitter
page right now what what the first thing the first thing on his Twitter page Is he finally
Hit his legend in Hearthstone
What?
Get out of here
Does he have a Twitch page? I swear to god
Is he streaming?
No effing way
Wait are you sure this is him?
William Hung
This is him
At WH53
But he's He can't This is him. William Hung. This is him. At WH53.
But he's...
This can't...
This is him.
He's in San Gabriel, California.
What the shit?
Founder of Unlock Your Life Purpose.
Strategic planning for people transitioning into speaking and coaching.
This is him.
Oh my god.
Wow.
It is him.
He's like, time to get rid of video games I don't play anymore, and he has an Altair thing.
Oh, my God. I love this.
Get out of here.
This is incredible.
This is exactly what I always wanted to know.
No one ever thinks about him after he was on that show, and now I see he's killing it.
Damn, dude.
He was on the bill.
My first album, Inspiration, became the number one independent album on billboards.
He has a number one billboard album.
Damn, he's got a number one billboard album?
He is doing so much better than us.
He only has 324 followers, but it doesn't matter.
I'm going to follow him right now.
Follow him right now.
I'm following him right now.
Follow.
Boom.
Done.
Yeah, we both got to follow him. I'm following him now. Follow. Boom. Done. I got to. Yeah, we both got to follow.
I'm following him.
Where's the Twitter?
William Hung Twitter.
At WH53. WH53.
All right.
There he is.
I'm following.
I'm following him.
I'm following.
I'm following.
What's happening?
I literally can't believe.
This can't be.
This really can't be him, can it?
Part of me is still skeptical.
I mean, so am I, because I tried to go to his website, but willlung.com isn't a thing.
Well, you would think he'd have a Twitter, right?
Maybe willhong.com?
Wait, so this person has...
Did he have the wrong information in his own Twitter page?
Hold on, I'm going to click the Twitter account.
It's him.
It's him. He just spelled his name wrong.
Oh my god.
She bangs.
She bangs. Oh my
god. Yeah, there's like pictures of him at
conventions and shit.
Wow. And you can't say this isn't
him because he literally, or maybe he doesn't
use it often, but he literally just tweeted about his Hearthstone school. Yeah, well, I'm like scrolling through guy
He's got Crandor pictures of him certain random places what?
We need to do a live show. We need to do it as the opening in vocal act. Yes
I come out sing for us will be like she we'll be like, she bangs, she bangs. For like a millionth time.
His one millionth she bangs.
Live on Cox and Crandor.
I'm so happy I found this.
This is not where I expected any of this to go, but this is where we're at right now.
Started at airplane packages.
Got to William Hung on Twitter.
I mean, it feels like we're still in the same
way like a little bit yeah yeah contact dear william it is us actually people probably
contact to speak at shit it's gonna be like i'll do a live show for a thousand dollars
yeah i wonder how much he charges to speak and And if we could say, look, we'll give you followers.
Yeah, we need to say today.
Go back to today and look at your Twitter follower increase.
That was us, Will.
That was us.
We can get you more if you come work with us.
Yeah.
On our new podcast.
Can add us to it.
Talk to Crendor and Will.
You can add us to his featured.
So we got Ellen, The Tonight Show,
Jimmy Kimmel, Rolling Stones,
NFL.com. They'll put Cox and Crandor.
Yep. Damn right.
And people will be like, this shit's lit.
Oh my god, he's speaking
reviews. You think I
could be a motivational speaker?
You know what? No.
Why not?
I don't. Alright, give me a motivational speech.
All right, I am having financial troubles.
Go.
All right, so you're having financial troubles.
What have you spent your money on, huh?
Huh?
You in the audience, what have you spent your money on?
My home and school.
Now, let's think about this from a better perspective.
What do you do do i work four jobs
all right so when you really peel it down to its core all right it's about believing
in what you do in creating a plan have you created a plan i doubt it if you did it's not a good one what you need to do is refinance refinance your home refinance your job
and refinance your life and that's going to take you to the next step now how do you do that i have
a book it's called crendor's life plans for you you can get it on amazon barnes and noble it's
only 20 it's not going to be that big of a uh investment you know that's the first step of my
plan excuse me one second one second one second second, one second, one second, one second, one second, one second.
I only eat ramen noodles.
That's great.
I can't afford $20.
Now, we're going to have to, okay?
We'll space it out.
All right, space it out.
Space out those noodles.
One ramen noodle a day, don't eat the next day.
Ramen noodle the next day, don't eat the day after that.
Before you know it, you're going to save them enough money that you're going to be able to buy a whole box of ramen noodles at costco that's gonna save you money so hungry
i just it's only ramen noodles all right listen here listen here you little shit hot water soup
just buy my goddamn book all right just buy the book you are good at this that's how you do it
i'm totally convinced. That's it.
Easy.
I see that.
It's so easy.
I swear to God, every one of those people has like 50,000 books.
It's like, what can you say?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't either.
And I'm not going to go buy them and read them.
I don't care.
Anybody who's read a life coach or motivational speaker thing, let us know.
Everyone who's read a life coach or motivational speaker thing.
Anyone who's ever done a thing, talk to us.
Yeah, just be like, I just want to know what they say.
Like, obviously, when they speak, they're like, buy my book.
But what's in the book?
Is it like, create a plan?
Maybe.
That's probably all it is.
They just give you generalized advice.
It's like YouTube people.
It's like, how do I do it?
And they're like, I'm going to break you a little advice here, folks.
How to be a YouTuber streamer.
Number one, believe in yourself.
Believe in what you create.
And just don't let anyone bring you down and be yourself.
Step number two you know just
marketing you gotta market yourself number three hard hard work just put in the work you know i
quit my job i marketed i just did it for like five years and before you know i was there
and uh you know now i'm bankrupt i uh, every time someone asks me what I think will be their strategy for getting good on YouTube,
it's like, I don't know, play the popular games.
Do the things that people want to watch.
The problem is there's no, like, surefire thing.
Yeah, it sounds cynical, but that's the best way to get found is by playing stuff that's popular so when people search, they'll find you.
But even then, it's an uphill battle.
Even then, there's other people doing that.
It's competitive.
People just need to do what I did back when I recorded WoW videos,
which was go to the Warcraft forums and post like,
have you seen this cool new video?
And then I'd get everyone that i knew to reply
to it and be like wow that was a great video and then we just keep it on the front page i did that
as well for various things yeah but it's yeah it's hard to do that now because there's so much
competition everybody's doing it we got in but everyone was like what are these people doing
they're crazy and we're like yeah we are crazy this guy is crazy you should watch his
videos can i tell you that i literally had like five accounts and i would just and the best part
was is back then i did too they didn't show you which character was linked to which account
so i would i went and made a bunch of fake characters on different servers and then logged
in and was like yeah this video is awesome there's like a bunch of fake characters on different servers and then logged in and was like,
yeah,
this video is awesome.
There's like a bunch of level one characters.
I,
uh,
I actually did that as well.
Cause they're like,
you can't post your own videos.
I'd be like,
ah,
look,
it's Gorgon spore.
Level eight goblins.
Like man,
this friend or Vince hilarious.
Check it out,
everybody.
And they're like, god, not
again. Another one of these?
And someone's like, I like Krendor
videos. I feel bad because there's not
a lot of gaming community websites like that
anymore. Yeah. Like, WoW still has
theirs, but I don't know many other big ones.
I guess if you're into MMORPG, there's probably a few.
But I guess Reddit is
the place now, but Reddit's a mess.
But yeah, that's what I would do
People are like how did you get so big
I would literally go to the Warcraft
Forums
And post about myself
As like have you guys seen this awesome video
And then I would
Bombard
Baba Booey and the guys over at
MMO Champion
I'd be like put my stuff on the front page
And be like sorry TotalBiscuit already covered that
I'm like fuck
So I
That's what I did
I would do that with Wow Insider
Yeah the first year that's what I did
That's all I did was just
Sometimes you gotta clickbait
There's a reason everybody clickbaits
And it's cause people click it
So when I made my thing I called it unreleased cataclysm trailer
And the amount of people that came out of that video
Disliked it and were like
This is not an official unreleased
Cataclysm trailer
Was a lot but
It was like number one if you searched cataclysm
For like a year because of that
And that's what you gotta do
You just gotta, you know,
if I could play more games with boobs in them, I would.
Those are some great thumbnails.
Those get clicks.
Yeah.
How did we get here?
I don't know, but I think we should go to MeUndies.
Yeah, MeUndies.
Guys, you've definitely heard us talk about MeUndies in the past.
You know they are fun, comfy undies that feel awesome.
They feel so good.
They look great.
They feel great.
I've turned on many friends to them.
Many of you on Twitter have hit us up being like,
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That's because they are, y'all.
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And you can get
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You don't got to. Yeah, you don't gotta go to
Target and be like, well, they got
tight white
spaghetti brand. They got
skedio brand underwear. They got fruit looms. You got fruit loops like that. They got Skedio brand underwear.
They got Fruit Looms.
You got Fruit Loops like that.
They all feel the same in garbage.
Fruit Loops underwear might be fun, but it's not as good as MeUndies.
Exactly.
MeUndies come in many shapes, many sizes.
They've got socks and pants as well now.
We got some of those pants, and they are out of bounds.
Out of bounds.
They are so good.
They are out of reality.
I'm out.
That's because they're made from sustainably sourced material.
These beechwood tree soft fabric things, I have no idea how it works.
I can't tell you how it works.
No idea.
All I know is it makes them so soft.
So soft. Once you put a pair on your body, two things are going to happen. One, you're. All I know is it makes them so soft. Mm-hmm. So soft.
Once you put a pair on your body, two things are going to happen.
One, you're going to be like, oh, these are soft.
And two, as you go through the day, you won't even, like, think about it.
You'll just realize after the day it feels like you're wearing nothing.
And you're like, ooh, these are wonderful.
And that's because they're fantastic.
Beachwood.
Yeah.
They have them for ladies, for men, for anyone who wants to put them on their body.
I'm sure you can find a way to put it on a pet if you want to.
Who knows?
Yeah.
You can have them sleep on.
MeUndies is so sure you'll love your first pair that if you're not happy,
they are going to do whatever it takes to make it right.
And if they can't keep them, you'll get a refund too.
It's so easy. It's risk-free.
It's the best underwear ever.
Wow. Where would I go to get such a deal?
You definitely should go to
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Crendor for 20% off your
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The MeUnders. That's Australian.
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It is a win-win. You'll be like us.
Tell everyone you know about MeUndies.
Here's, like I've said before, invite
them over, drop your pants, and say,
touch my underwear.
Nothing bad can come of it.
Friends, love when you do that.
I've had nothing but good experiences.
And I'm definitely not leading you astray.
And if you end up in jail,
that's your problem, not mine.
Maybe that's what happens at the airport. Yeah, they're like, undies rub rub rub rub rub i'm like yes they are you're
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Alright, Crendor, let's jump to cop drop cop seven is
hey we're up here in the chapter copter over here we got thunderstorms
crazy thunderstorms actually it's pouring rain outside. Uh, kind of relaxing, though.
I always like a good thunderstorm.
Some people are like, ugh, I hate it.
It's raining outside.
Like, come on.
You know, you get enough sun throughout the year.
You know, have some rain.
Have some nice, relaxing rain.
Just chill inside.
Look out the window.
Get a cup of coffee.
Analyze the fact that, hey, everything's feeling pretty good as you look out there.
Unless, you know, your power goes out, tornadoes, lightning, crazy shit happens,
in which case that'd probably suck, but I don't got that problem.
So, hey, back to you.
Thanks, Crendor.
Now let's go over to Crendor at the weather desk.
Crendor, how's that weather?
Weather? It's raining outside over here, but let's go somewhere else.
Let's go. I'm going to give Woppy a rest today, and we're but let's go somewhere else.
I'm going to give Wap your rest today, and we're just going to go to Tallahassee.
Tallahassee sounds great.
Tallahassee.
That's the only Tallah I know.
How do you spell Tallahassee?
Oof.
I thought you were spelling it. Tallahassee spell Tallahassee? Oof. I thought you were spelling it.
Tallahassee.
Tallahassee.
Jasper, Indiana.
Wait, that's where we went last time.
Wait, how did you type in Tallahassee and end up at Jasper?
I don't.
That's not.
I don't know.
You were spelling it wrong.
You were definitely spelling it. Oh, here it is.
All right, we're fine
I know it's not worth the full animation but I need Dan to animate you typing in
Tallahassee while spelling out Jasper
TallahasseE at all.
Oh, my God.
All right.
I've got it now.
I've got it now.
80 degrees.
Mostly cloudy.
Feels like 87.
High.
Low.
74.
UV index 0 of 10.
We've got tonight 74 degrees.
Mostly cloudy skies.
Straight shower.
Thunderstorm is possible.
The low 74 winds
light and variable just like math wednesday 91 degrees 50 chance of rain out there uh so dumb
wednesday uh it's gonna be a little cloudy at that time 74 degrees thursday it's gonna be
very hot we're gonna have 93 40 high humidity probably bring an umbrella wherever you're going.
That's weather.
All right.
Was that Woppy?
What happened there at the end?
Did Woppy kill that man for doing the weather instead of him?
He might have.
Oh, my God.
Find out next time on weather.
Yeah, as the world turns.
Soap operas are another thing.
Soap operas never get old for me Especially Spanish language soap operas
Oh yeah
Go tune into like Telemundo
Watch some of those, they are
Fantastic
I bet Telemundo's got like
Only soap operas on
No, they have news and stuff
In between soap operas
Oh, do they?
Or shows that are like Saturday night.
Like Nueva Doces, Senor.
That's my favorite.
Nueva Doces, Senor.
Is it like Sabado something?
Sabado.
Sabado Noches.
Yeah, Sabado Noche is one.
Asà fue la transformacion de ariana grande i mean that's fine yeah uh translate this was the transformation of ariana grande saturday night
yeah is a musical program television directed by matilda fernandez yararin between 1987 and 1989. Wait, why do I
know that? Why do I know a show
that isn't on anymore? I don't
know.
Sabado Noche.
No! Why would I watch a
Spanish language thing in the
80s? I don't know. I was
like a baby. I was
a sweet little baby boy. Why would I watch this?
I don't know. I was just asking little baby boy Why would I watch this? I don't know
I was just asking
Because maybe you did watch it
And then you had some nostalgic memories about it
I definitely did not
Was I incepted to believe that was a thing?
I've never heard of that before
Alright
Well now I clearly have
My first
The first show probably was the real one
Noches de dos or whatever.
Nachos de dos.
Nachos de dos.
That's a good game.
Nachos de dos.
Nachos de dos.
Okay.
All right.
That's weather.
Let's go to sports.
Yeah.
Okay.
Hey, everybody.
Welcome to sports.
So NBA's over.
NHL's over
they had the drafts those were kind of fun
to watch now teams hope that their draft picks
turn out good
baseball's happening
a whole bunch of teams getting ready for the
all-star break
golf's happening NASCAR's gonna
happen
and the World Cup's still going on
how's that even I haven't even checked in on that.
World Cup. Let's find out.
Let's see. Peru
beat Australia.
Argentina beat Nigeria. Croatia
beat Iceland.
Mexico, Sweden tomorrow.
And South Korea, Germany tomorrow
as well.
I don't know what any of that
means, though.
Is this still like the first round?
Or are they in the playoffs?
I don't know. I just don't know.
I don't know either.
Listen, America's not there.
Oh wait, it says
round
of 16.
Wait. Match day 3 of 3. Wait.
Match day 3 of 3.
We're on match day 3 of 3, whatever that means.
So those are things happening
on match day 3 of 3.
Spain-Morocco tied.
What?
What?
Uruguay-Russia.
Uruguay beat Russia.
Saudi Arabia beat Egypt.
Iran-P, Portugal tied.
The thing is, like, with
ties, it's just like
so uneventful in a tie.
Yeah, I
I've always
I don't remember, I guess a game
happened the other day. We were out to dinner
and I looked up and I was like,
oh, what's the score? And the guy's like, 3-3.
It's like, wait, but it ended. I was like, oh, what's the score? And the guy was like, 3-3. I was like, wait, but it ended.
I was like, oh.
All right, then.
Hockey used to be like that.
Then they changed it to have shootouts at the end.
But even shootouts are kind of like a weird way to end it.
I feel like they should just keep playing.
Just keep playing.
I don't care if it goes on for eight hours.
Once someone scores, then there you go no more tie just
keep playing until they're exhausted that's what i would that's what i would do in my league
yeah i i just don't know why they don't do stuff like that i feel like that is the easiest solution
right because people want to see winners although i guess maybe after 90 minutes or whatever, you're like, I just want it to end.
I don't know. I have no clue.
You guys don't understand football.
I literally don't. You're absolutely right.
I would love to know more.
Explain it to me, world, please.
Explain it to us.
And that's sports, really.
There's not much going on except World Cup.
Okay.
Well, sir, i believe we have our
new story yes but i'll let you get into it what is our big news story of the day big news story
of the day is crazy japanese game shows that i still have open let's do this all right i'm ready
for this so i'm gonna open up some of these here we go uh let's start with this one there's like four different ones 10 weirdest gap japanese
10 weirdest japanese game shows that actually exist okay uh all right so let's see number 10
is ak bingo it's a famous japanese game group in which members of girl group AKB48 playing
the dodgeball.
Yeah, go on.
Now that sounds exciting, but truly it isn't
because whoever gets hit by the ball has to
pay a penalty, which isn't pleasant.
The comedy duo Bad Boys
decide the penalty for the
girls and the penalties are very gross.
For example, take a look at the picture.
The two girls were hit
with the ball wait the two girls who were hit with the ball has to face the penalty they have to blow
to blow a huge insect through a tube and release ends up in the mouth of the loser yuck so you get
an idea how the punishments are funny and disgusting at the same time oh so
basically it's a show where like very attractive women compete and then the bad boys comedy duo
makes them suffer through like humiliating things that would probably freak people out basically
yeah that sounds like a japanese game show yeah uh The meaning of the word sakuri in Japanese
Is look alike
In this game the contestants have to bite into everyday objects and items
Oh I've seen this
This is the guy who bites the doorknob
And the door handle
And he has that smile that's like
Yeah I've seen this
See pretty much
It looks like things are made out of cake or chocolate or
something but it's not always the case uh the host of the show can hand the contestant a doorknob a
shoe anything you can think of they try to make the right choice and either get the sweet taste
of cake chocolate etc and if they don't well then they get a long lasting good taste of everyday
objects i think that's a fascinating i. I'd watch that all the time.
Yeah, I'd watch that.
That has to exist on YouTube, right?
Yeah, it's gotta.
Alright, that's cool.
Here's Tor.
This is a very scary and bizarre game show.
The game is pretty simple. You're asked seven questions
on a specific subject or topic.
You're given 30 seconds to answer the question.
And to get the questions, you need to make it
up a wall that inclines more
and more as you go
up. Then you're completely
mummified.
Wait, what? You need to make
it up the wall that inclines more and more as you go
up, and then you're completely mummified.
You're dumped into a coffin.
What?
Wait, what?
What?
That's what it says.
What is that? What is this game show?
Oh, I see how.
Okay.
All right.
I'll miss.
Look at that.
Whoa.
What is it?
So like you need to make it up a wall that inclines more and more than you're completely
modified.
So it like keeps wrapping.
Oh, and then like dumps you into a coffin.
Oh, so this is just terrible english but the idea here is that yeah you are there's a mummy machine that wraps you and you have 30
seconds to answer the question as it wraps you yeah and if you don't answer you're completely
mummified then it dumps you in a coffin yeah i mean that's that's like that english show that is
you sit in a chair and as you answer questions wrong, it eventually moves you further and further back until it ejects you from the chair.
Pretty much the same thing, except this one's a mummy, which is fine by me.
That's pretty all right.
I watch people get mummified.
The problem is when they're mummified, their face gets mummified, and so you can't see them scream when they get flung back.
Yeah, that's true.
That's the problem, Japan.
Let's go to the end of the world. That's
what the next one's called. That's a crazy
name for a show, but okay.
Nippon Television Corporation Network created
this game show. It is known as
Sekai no Hate Made
Iteku.
Wait, what? Yep.
The contestants who play the game
are sent across the world to meet different people
and have to have some strange encounter.
For example, a Kaio Emoto who's wearing a sailor suit school uniform and have thick painted eyebrows was tasked to confront the wildlife.
They're put in plexiglass predator box and being attacked by wild grizzly bear.
Wow. I feel like this is a show that I would watch
only because of that photo.
Yep, I'd watch this show.
That's just a woman in a box being attacked by a bear.
I'd watch this.
Yeah.
I'd watch that show.
Let's see.
Darrow.
You might have seen numerous American shows
where music plays in the background
while you're asked to answer question
And if you don't answer you lose
This is the same concept
But much more scary
And this contestants are asked questions
While planks beneath them start to retract
They stand above a bottomless pit
And
The
Wait the contestants have to answer the questions while their room starts
filling up with water then they fall in yeah i guess so i mean that this is basically an episode
of clone wars where obi-wan kenobi becomes a bounty hunter and he has to prove himself and
this is how he does it this is literally that episode yeah Yeah, that's literally that episode. Okay, sure. A Life Out of Prizes by Denpa Shonen.
What?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What?
It has a pie on it?
Denpa Shonen, sure.
Oh, Denpa Shonen.
That's the cover of this episode.
The game features the famous Ah, we'll save that image.
The game features the famous comedian Nasubi.
For the game, he was challenged to stay alone,
unclothed, locked in an apartment.
He was cut from the outside communication,
and the only way he could get the stuff he needed was from the sweepstakes magazine contests.
Nasubi was filmed all the time.
He won a million yen through the sweepstakes.
After he won the money,
producers took him to South Korea, locked him
in a second apartment, and was
challenged to enter the sweepstakes
again to earn airfare money
to return home?
Wait, so the question
is, they locked him in this apartment
until he won the sweepstakes?
Yeah. And then he won the
sweepstakes? What are the odds
of that? I know.
That's crazy.
That can't be real.
That can't be real.
That's got to have some, like, you know, influences on the outside.
It does have a name that is not the name of a game show.
Yeah.
A Life Out of Prizes by Denpa Shonen?
Yeah.
No.
That's, like, that's a movie.
What the shit is?
Okay. This one's called spread your legs now that's the japan i know one of the most strangest game shows ever created the game
features three girls one girl has the job of spinning a while one girl sits in a torture
device which looks pretty terrifying and one girl operates the torture device wait time out time
out time out time out right
one girl
spins
yes one girl has the job of
spinning a while
what does that mean I don't know
I think it's just written badly but I'm not
positive I feel like we
have definitely entered into not a native
English speaker here
yes okay uh let's see the girl spins the wheel and then the wheel number decides how far apart
the legs of the girl sitting in the torture would be spread the girl manipulating the device then
operates the machine to spread the girl's legs that's it but but like what what is that what is the game show i don't i don't i don't know what you win
i don't i don't understand it but yeah like how do you win this game i don't know
uh i don't i don't understand i simply don't understand here's a gaki no su kai this is no
task for kids and wait this is no task for kids is the English translation of the game.
In this game, the contestants have survived an entire week of funny jokes and hilarious pranks,
but they are required to not laugh because if they do, they are punished.
Okay, sure.
Sure.
All right.
That's that.
Escape a fart.
This is a very bizarre game show.
I'd watch this game.
The objective of the show is to...
Wait.
The objective of the show is quit the opposite to the game's title.
The contestant has to spread his farts around to everyone present in the
area. As you can see, the farts
are dyed yellow. The contestants have to
wave their arms in creative ways
to spread the fart in all areas
of the room.
How is that possible?
How is that possible?
You can see it.
How do you...
Basically, you're like putting the dust up your butt and then farting the dust out?
You must have to like eat something or I don't know.
Maybe.
I don't know.
I don't know the rules.
I don't know the rules of fart dust.
Is it like Cheetos dust for your butt?
I guess so.
It's got to be.
Okay.
And then the number one for this site is That Bum Game.
The original name of the game is unknown.
In this game, the girls are required to stand in front of a drawing of a body.
They have to stick their bum out of the hole of the drawing body.
The contestants are then asked to figure out which bum belongs to which girl.
It is a strange game, but then again it's Japanese game.
Even the website
is like, hey, strange.
But that's Japan.
Yep, that is Japan.
Let's see if there's any different ones in some
of these other articles.
We've got the Candy Not
Candy.
Darrow Darrow Solve Puzzles,
which you do and that's uh that's the one we I
think we saw yeah that is a tour saw that human Tetris contestants stained on
a platform while a series of walls come rapidly towards them the only way to
make it through the wall is to maneuver ones by to get through the challenging cutouts. Oh, I think I've seen that before. Yeah, I've seen that.
Uh...
It's like, uh...
It's kinda like a thing moving at you.
Aw, look at that.
And then...
He's gotta be like, bloop! And like jump through it.
That's a terrible explanation.
Oh! Yeah! This was
called Wipeout in the States.
Yeah, I knew I saw it before.
Let's see.
AK Bingo, saw that.
Bum Game, saw that.
There is one called Strip the Girl I found.
Strip the Girl.
Ah, there it is.
For this game, the contestants are put through a series of challenges,
such as throwing beanbags in order to remove boxes in front of the girl.
If they succeed, they get to catch a glimpse of a naked girl.
Whoa. Now that's a Japanese game show. Mm-hmm. boxes in front of the girl. If they succeed, they get to catch a glimpse of a naked girl. Whoa!
Now that's a Japanese game show.
It's like a picture of a guy in a diaper
trying to get up there to see.
There's another one called It's Electrifying.
And they have a YouTube video.
And I click the video, and as far
as I'm aware,
there is a woman at the end of a long runway in a bikini,
and the objective is a man laying on a plank has to maneuver himself so his head hits her boobs.
But if he does, then the board he's on becomes electrical,
and he gets shocked for doing it?
Question mark?
What?
I'm looking at this right now.
The video literally is this guy.
There's four guys, and they're all cheering this dude on.
And this girl's like, oh, my God.
This show is sponsored by HP, which I think is funny.
HP's like, buy our laptops and shove your head in this girl's boobs.
So this girl's sitting there there and she's just like,
wave this guy.
And so he has to move across
and try to get his head into her boobs.
But I think...
Oh my God, I see it.
He's getting electric shocked.
Yeah, if he goes too far.
Maybe he has to...
There's like a green row.
Maybe he has to get into the green
without actually going past it. Yeah, I think so. And so that's why a green row. Maybe he has to get into the green without actually going past it.
Yeah, I think so.
And so that's why he got shocked.
These rules seem very unorthodox.
Yeah, he went a little too far.
There's another game called Soapy Stairs.
Ah, yes.
Which they climb soapy stairs.
Oh, here's one called,
How many coins can you catch with your greedy, greedy boobs?
Pretty much, a girl tries to catch a bunch of coins with her boobs,
and she gets to keep all the coins she catches.
As you can see from that image.
The other name for it is...
Maybe that's the real name, but I see it as human slot machine.
It's kinda like, uh... And this one
wouldn't have to grab as many coins as possible with their clothes.
There's only one hitch though.
All these women are only wearing bikinis
is what this one says.
Although your name
is much more entertaining. Yeah.
That's what this
thing called it. What was it called
with your greedy greedy boobs?
Your greedy greedy boobs.
What is the translation of that? don't know hold on hold on english to japanese what is this what was it
what was the name of it uh it's called how many coins can you catch with your greedy greedy boobs boobs. I feel like this isn't right. Anata no yokubarina
donyokuna opai
de
dorikurai
no coin
osu
kamaru
kotoka
dekumasuka?
I feel like that's not
right. I feel like that's not right. I feel like that's not right.
It's probably not.
Yeah, we'll get schooled.
Someone will be like, that's not even accurate.
I've seen this show multiple times.
Yeah, someone tell us how to say
Catch Coins of the Greedy Greedy Boobs.
What a ridiculous name.
Or what the show's actually called.
Yeah, or what the show's called.
I mean, I don't want to know that really, but sure.
Yeah.
Really, what we've learned is that Japan is the leader in game shows.
Yeah, we've come full circle this episode.
Japan is the leader of game shows, and we are all far behind.
Yeah, very far behind.
We are so far behind.
Where's the show that we have where people Catch money with their
Greedy, greedy boobs
That's my favorite
My favorite phrase
Greedy, greedy boobs
I want to put that in a movie
I don't know when
I'm going to write a script and in that script it's going to be like
That's right, catch the money with your greedy, greedy boobs
What a ridiculous line
I've never heard anything like that in my life
that's so funny
alright sure sure Japan
whatever
God bless Japan and God bless America
that's how it'll end
yeah that's how every episode ends
God bless Japan
and God bless America
okay well that's it for us Every episode is. God bless Japan. And God bless America.
Okay, well that's it for us.
Yeah.
Thank you so much for listening.
Crandor, hit them with the socials.
We got socials.
We got YouTube.com slash Cox and Crandor podcast.
If you want to listen to podcasts on YouTube. We got YouTube.com slash Cox and Crandor.
If you want to watch some animations of animated clips on a podcast.
We've got Twitter.com slash Jessica Cox.
We got Twitter.com slash Crandor. We've got
YouTube for both of us. Just Google us.
Just YouTube us. Just Twitch us.
Just do something. Find us.
It's
I think he died too.
I don't...
Was Crandor a robot the entire time?
No. Oh my god.
I would never be Roman.
Oh, Crendor, you and your greedy, greedy robo-boos.
All right, that's it for us.
Thank you so much for watching, and as always...
To be continued.