Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 219 - THE POWER OF CHICKEN!
Episode Date: November 15, 2019The boys are back with another episode and this time they've got the long awaited review of Popeye's Chicken Sandwiches! Did it give Crendor super human strength?! What is in this sammy!? Also a nerd ...defends his home in the nerdiest way possible. All this and so much more on an all new Cox n' Crendor! Get a free pair of socks with purchase at http://stance.com/cox Order your Health + Ancestry kit for 50% off at http://23andme.com/cox.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Today's episode is brought to you by 23andMe.
Everyone loves personalized gifts, and nothing is more personal this holiday
than the gift of your DNA and how to unlock it.
Also, today we're brought to you by Stance.
This holiday season, take a stance with some great socks for a good cause.
We will talk about that later, but let's jump into this podcast.
Hello, everybody! it's time for
Hit me, wake your ass up, it's Cax and Crandor in the morning!
Hit me, hit me, hit me, hit me, Cax and Crandor in the morning!
Hello everybody, welcome to an exciting episode of Cax and Crandor in the morning!
Whoa!
What was that?
I don't know.
Wow!
Whoa!
That was like the start of a Christopher Walken impression.
Whoa! Whoa!
That was two bad Christopher Walken impressions right there.
That's what I can do is I can do bad Christopher Walken impressions.
Whoa.
Whoa, it's me, Christopher Walken.
This is the best I've got.
It just sounds like you doing Nicolas Cage doing Christopher Walken
It's me, Nicolas Cage
That's my Nicolas Cage
Whoa, it's me, Christopher Cage
It's me, Christopher Walken
It sounds like you're also doing like a Danny Zuko as well
I don't know who that is
You know, John Travolta
Oh
Whoa, I'm gotta go pick up Sandy I don't know who that is. You know, John Travolta. Oh.
Whoa.
I've got to go pick up Sandy.
We've got to go get in our car and drive away.
All right.
Well.
Yes.
How's it going?
It's going great.
Have you ever been to Italy?
Italy?
No.
Italy?
No.
So there's a place, I assume at many malls around this great nation of ours, but especially in LA because that's how we live.
Right. The mall that we love to go to, that weird-ass mall, there's a place inside called Italy.
And it is a three-story, multi-leveled, Italian restaurant place.
There's like eight restaurants up in there.
All of them serve different Italian food.
You can go get like pizza and paschetti and all sorts of stuff.
And then there's like coffee, but there's also a store that sells books, wine, and Italian foods,
and all sorts of other crap.
It was crazy.
I've never been because I'm not posh and cool like my parents.
My parents were like, for your father's birthday
we're going to go to Italy.
It was great. That was a ton of fun.
It was like Ikea but for Italian food.
Interesting. Yeah, it was huge.
It was a bunch of tourists
walking around and everyone was like, oh,
I'll have this. I got a
like a
clam thing. That was good. I got like a clam thing and then i got a uh a like like a clam thing wow that was good i got like a clam thing and then i
got the uh a chocolate mousse thing and i was like oh and i got a latte and i felt good huh
there's uh so it's called eat ollie yes yes italy it looks like there's one in la boston nyc and chicago oh my god oh oh see i could go to italy you could you could travel
to italy i would love to hear the report of that i bet that'd be a treat i probably would i kind of
try this out i like trying the italy's yeah well i mean if you forget we'll just go in march yeah
that sounds good if you forget we'll just probably will. But what I did forget about is Popeyes.
I didn't either.
So I'm excited to talk to you about this because last week, this is one of the few times we've done something and stuck to it.
It is.
It's very true.
And I'm very pleased with us.
This is important.
This is a big goal for us.
This is a big goal.
By the way, I actually filmed my initial reaction.
Is it online?
It's not online yet, but I'm going to upload it literally after this so that everybody can go to it tomorrow or today.
Oh, my God.
I'm very excited to see this.
I did it in like a review bra style at the start.
A little bit there.
He's like, hello, everyone.
This is my food review.
It was very good.
So, yeah, it's on the old YouTube.com slash.
Wow. Crandor'll be going up there.
Get ready for a once in a lifetime
experience of watching me eat a sandwich.
Your video,
or not video, your tweet
was fascinating.
It's what inspired me and
reminded me to go out and get it because you hyped this
up. You hyped this sandwich up
more than I think any tweet I saw online.
Yeah, I ate the sandwich.
I loved it.
And I went to the gym.
And I literally went to the gym like 15 minutes after eating the sandwich.
Maybe even 10.
And I had probably one of the best workouts I've ever had.
I was like, I felt sore all over at like the next day.
But like I had so much energy from eating that Popeye's saying,
which that was like,
and I just,
I went all out is,
is crazy.
What,
what,
what,
first off,
which sandwiches you get?
I got the spicy one.
And then the next day I got the normal one.
What?
You went back.
Oh my God.
I gotta go back.
I gotta go back.
And honestly,
the spicy is better.
Here's the thing.
That's what I heard.
That's why I got the spicy one.
Yeah,
it was better.
I definitely recommend the spicy.
So here's my thing. That's what I heard. That's why I got the spicy one. Yeah, it was better. I definitely recommend the spicy. So here's my thoughts.
Okay.
I don't know what magic power is in this chicken sandwich.
Yeah.
I don't know if it's pure joy and love or if it is like crack cocaine.
I don't know what's in this thing.
But what I do know is that I very
very very much
enjoyed it. But it's no
different or better than I'd say a Chick-fil-A sandwich.
Yeah, I kind of agree with that. It just has
a little more of a crunch, I guess.
And like a sauce on it. But
other than that, I was like
I mean, it's good. I don't know that I'd
go out of my way and wait another 35
minutes to get one.
Yeah, well.
But with that said, I, too, had like a second wind on life.
I ate that sandwich and was like, I got to get stuff done today.
I got to go do things.
I'm going to let you know, worrisome.
I'm not sure why that is.
I've never experienced anything like that. I was like,
oh, I gotta get stuff done
today. Again,
I don't know what's in that sandwich, but we both
have the exact same reaction. I don't know
that I'd say that, like, wow, what a revelatory
sandwich. Like, mmm, it changed my life.
But I will say, it made
me want to get very active and do
things. And that,
I don't know what's in that sandwich, but I was like, ooh, them spices got me.
Maybe it's just the fact that it's like a lot of protein.
Maybe.
I don't know.
But yeah, what did you say in your video?
Give us a hint. I mean, so I did my initial like, hello, everyone.
And then, you know, I opened the sandwich.
I have my initial first bite
i take a few more bites i show off the sandwich a little bit and then i give my impression you
know that's that's what you're getting from this i think six to seven minute video
uh-huh and uh give us a hint of your impression like what'd you when you bit into it what'd you
say like talk to me i didn't say anything when i bit into it? What'd you say like talk to me? I didn't say anything when I bit into it. You just see the expressions on my face and you see
You know like how I'm chewing this I'm like, you know what?
It's a pretty good sandwich. It was better than I thought you know the more the more I chewed the more bites
I took the more I was like every bite is just it's a good bite
Sometimes you get a bite and it's like, you know, it's like, oh, that's a bad bite.
But this sandwich, every bite was a good bite.
Well, okay.
I mean, I'm glad we both got those sandwiches.
I'm glad we both enjoyed, it seems like.
I would say wait until the fever dies down before you jump in and try to get one.
Yeah.
Because it's not, like, life-changing.
But it will somehow power you to change your life.
I want to put that out there.
It will give you the drive you need to go out.
And I'm going to say take on the day.
I definitely agree with that.
It's definitely worth a try.
And will you get superpowers?
Possibly.
Yeah.
Is it filled with radiation gamma rays?
Maybe.
Yeah.
If a spider bites you while you're eating one, will you become Spider-Man?
Maybe.
It's quite possible.
You never know with that type of stuff.
Yeah, you don't know.
All I know is I had a great workout after.
That's all I know.
Man.
Wow, look at us.
Yeah.
So what else is going on?
What happened with you?
I feel like I was just, the Popeyes was such a big thing.
It was such a big part of your week.
Like, I don't.
Oh, yeah.
I don't remember where I was.
What?
I don't.
Great.
Great start to this story.
But all I know is this person said she comes into my room with fucking wire cutters and
a box of matches.
What?
What?
She said she comes in my room with fucking wire cutters and a box of matches
that's it i don't know the reference i just heard them say that and i knew they were in a group of
friends i that sounds like you post those things that's where it was i went out with my friend to
eat and then i heard them at the bar but then it was too loud to hear anything else it sounds like
one of those one sentence horror stories it kind of does yeah right it's very
weird but the implications are out of control i don't know what that means yeah i mean it sounded
like uh she had some crazy shit going on but at the same time i think it was just her friend being
goofy so i don't know it could have been something like it was either very serious or very not
serious but i feel like it wasn't as serious serious because she brought it up at a bar with her friends.
Friends being goofy always leads down the old wire cutter matches route.
Yeah, so that's the only thing I wrote down.
That's all you wrote down this week.
Yeah.
Man, you're living the best life.
I, uh, man, this week, the most exciting thing, I worked all week like crazy trying to get stuff done.
I, uh, I will say one of the wildest things that happened this week is I was out at the post office and this guy was like banging on his P.O. box, like banging on it.
He's like, there's a package stuck in there and I can't get the package.
And they're like, sir, well, if you, if you, sir, if you keep pulling, it's going to keep
getting, so you're going to break the package, sir.
And he's like, God damn, I can't get the package.
He's like trying to pull it open and he's rattling the entire wall.
And so all these other packages, you can hear them shaking.
And the guy's like, sir, you're going to need to stop so I can get it for you.
And I'll bring it out to you.
And he's like, I want you to touch my package.
And of course, I had like a little laugh because I was like, he doesn't want to touch this package.
And then I like went in, did all my mail stuff, came back out.
He was sitting there waiting for the guy.
And he's like, look what they made me do.
They made me wait.
And I looked at him and I looked around.
I was like, is he talking to me?
And I was like, yeah, you know, the post office, they make you wait.
The window opened and the guy appeared and he was like, don't talk shit on the U.S. Postal Service.
I was like, okay, I'm going to go now.
I don't have time for this.
And I was like, bye.
Bye.
I don't want to be involved anymore.
Bye, everybody. And I just like, bye, bye. I don't want to be involved anymore. Bye, everybody.
I just like walked out.
I was like, I'm fine.
I don't want anything to do with this.
I come here to not be harassed.
I'm all right.
Yeah.
Post office is always a fun place, honestly.
It's like you walk in and you don't know what you're going to get.
It's kind of like Pawn Stars.
That's exactly right.
The post office is the Pawn Stars of mail.
You're right.
You never know what is going to walk through those doors.
Yeah, that would seem to have been better if it was Chumlee and the grandpa.
And he was like, Chumlee, Chumlee, you gotta stop pulling on the dough.
He's like, don't tell me what to do.
I'm going to get it.
There's money in this box.
Chumlee, what are you doing?
Chumlee, you dumb boy.
Yeah, man.
My favorite is when they, there's one episode where they were like,
we got to get the old man
Something for his birthday
I hear he likes pie
And then the one guy was like you can't get him pie
He'll kill him
He's like yeah but we gotta get him pie for his birthday
Which by the way pie for a birthday
Is hilarious to begin with
He's like we gotta get him pie for his birthday
And for some
I can't remember how it ends,
but for some reason,
all I remember is the old dude being like,
I like cherry pie.
I don't remember anything but that.
Yes.
I like a good cherry pie.
I like cherry pie.
Like, I don't,
I like,
don't remember what happened. I imagine
he got his pie,
but also, I seem to
recall that it was a weird
way he got it. Like, they did a whole
setup where at the end, they were like,
oh, you didn't get him his pie!
And then one was just there, and he's like,
thank you, boy!
Damn, I don't remember
what happened at all. I just remember that line. He's like, I don't remember what happened at all.
I just remember that line.
It was like, I like cherry pie.
It's a great show.
It's just a great show.
Like, that's your biggest memory from the show.
I like cherry pie.
Most of that show, I don't remember any.
I remember one episode they were trying to film a horror movie, which, again, isn't the show about owning a pawn shop.
But there's a plot.
Every Chumlee plot line is like, I bought a camera, and I'm going to film a horror movie.
And everyone's like, Chumlee, don't film a horror movie.
He's like, I'm going to do it.
It's going to be good.
He's like, I'll begin your horror film, Chumlee.
Yeah.
I don't know anyone's name on that show what are the names on that show
paw big paw pawn stars is no longer on the air thank god rick rick was the pawn star guy then
there was young rick then there was chumlee and then old main i think that was it hold on just
for the just for the record time out austin lee Russell, better known by his stage name, Chumlee, is an American actor, businessman,
and reality television personality known as a cast member on the History Channel television show, Pawn Stars.
I forgot it was on the History Channel.
Oh, my God.
It was on the History Channel. Oh, my God. It was on the History Channel.
Unreal.
Well, they got away with it being on the History Channel because they're like, here's some facts about some objects that are old.
Yeah.
Corey Harrison, Rick Harrison, and Richard Benjamin Harrison.
Oh, rest in peace, Rich.
Oh, yeah.
I heard the old man died.
That's kind of yeah last year in las
vegas nevada huh sad times who is olivia black and she was on the show uh wait olivia black i
guess she was a pawn star oh she was there's one episode where she was with chumley uh
do they include her in chumley episodes just to make her like, look, no one wants to just watch Chumlee.
She was a suicide girl?
What the hell?
Did they just like bring her in to be like, eh?
They had to have.
They had to have been like, you know what?
Olivia Black's net worth is $1 million.
That's what happens when you get on that show.
Uh-oh.
The real reason she was fired from Pawn Stars.
What?
Oh, my God. Oh, it's a YouTube video. Oh, God. And I clicked it. Here's the problem. Uh oh The real reason she was fired from Pawn Stars What? Oh my god
Oh it's a YouTube video
Oh god and I clicked it
Here's the problem
Every time I click a YouTube video that's like
Supposed to be an informative video
It's always a British dude
Every single time
He's like one of the biggest things in reality TV
Was Pawn Stars
I don't like it
I don't like it
I don't like that the British are taking over our commentary channels.
American commentators have things to talk about.
I mean, the British have some pretty good television.
Look, I get it.
You're right.
It's very entertaining.
That's where I saw that one about that guy's penis, and it was hilarious.
Wait.
I told you.
I had to have told you this.
It was the best thing to happen to me.
Because that's kind of a weird thing to bring up and then move on from.
A few years back, I think it was for Dodger and Sam's wedding.
We rented an Airbnb and we were sitting around one night.
And on TV, on literally the BBC, was a documentary about a guy and his extremely tiny penis.
And the whole thing was about him.
Like he had a girlfriend who loved him
but like this dude's dick was very tiny crendor like extremely tiny but she was like i love him
and it's fine and he it feels fine like everything's okay he needs to get over it but this dude's like
i can't i can't do it so it was an hour-long journey of him trying to come to terms with this little tiny penis.
And so let me tell you, he goes to this one woman that casts dicks.
That's her thing.
She dips him in coating and then makes molds of wieners.
And around her house are celebrity penises.
It was insane.
And so she casts his dick, and she's like, see, it's not that bad.
And the guy's like, oh, thank you.
He like goes on a spiritual journey.
By the end, it's him holding a plaster cast of his penis, screaming from a rooftop.
I love my penis.
Krendor, I've never.
All right.
I think I'm starting to remember the story because I remember you screaming.
I love my penis really loud.
I've never
ever ever enjoyed something so much it was hilarious truly one of the funniest things i've
ever seen i couldn't believe it see that's the thing that's the type of uh you know content that
the british are gonna bring over here to america a guy yelling i love my penis really loud on top
of a mountain yeah i mean you're right that's's why we have to steal British shows and make them American shows.
I get it now.
Only England has the true power to be like,
I love my penis!
I'll never forget.
I was in a room with like four other people watching it,
and I was dying.
I couldn't stop laughing.
I was like, I can't believe this is is on tv i can't believe they're just
showing this dude's dick on tv constantly and i can't believe that like it was this guys it was
it was actually beautiful and weird truly truly you're right england is ahead of us we've talked
about this before england is ahead of us the problem is they're taking all our american
complainers england has all the complainers. There's none left for Americans.
That's true.
But they complain in such an articulate way.
Yeah, I don't like it.
I don't like that they're good at it.
I complain like a crazy person.
That's the thing.
It's like the accent just gives them
some sort of superpower, essentially.
It makes everyone think they're smart
when really they're as dumb as us. It's an it's an illusion yeah yeah they're just as stupid as us
uh yeah because it's like they can be like oh bother i'm out of uh you know i don't even know
what i'm out of and then i'd be like i don't know what i'm out of sounds yeah it sounds the exact
same level of stupid except theirs is like refined stupid
yeah refined stupid yep that's gonna come up in one of the quote episodes
you're gonna be like man i don't remember what i said
well speaking of stupid that's the last thing you want to be. And this holiday season, the smartest gift is giving someone the gift of knowledge.
That's how I'm going to spin this.
Give someone the Health Plus Ancestry Kit from 23andMe.
You get 150 personalized genetic reports, including insights into your health that might
be able to help you and your doctor make choices down the line.
You'll get an ancestry breakdown of more than 1,500 geographic regions,
and it has an easy-to-use automatic family tree builder
that uses your DNA to start building out your family tree
and finding more of yous out there.
If you wanted to, you could get your own,
and think about Thanksgiving.
Rather than talking about politics or crazy stuff,
you could share things about your family that you learned
and what connects you all, right?
To help you pull off a smooth move.
For November, all month long, you can get 50% off.
That's just $99.
Order your Health Plus Ancestry Kit at 23andMe.com slash Cox.
That's the number 23andMe.com slash Cox.
Go do something great for yourself and your family.
Learn more about your history.
Learn more about your past.
Learn more about what could be in your future.
That's 23andme.com slash cox.
Also, while you're out there shopping for Christmas gifts, think about yourself and your childhood.
What was one of those gifts you were always like, really?
This is what you're going to give me, huh?
But now that you're an adult, you're like, oh, yes, I do love these.
Socks is what I'm talking about, y'all.
Socks.
And there are no better socks out there right now than Stance.
You probably noticed a bunch of ads about socks.
They're everywhere lately.
And people are probably like, wait,
why? Because one brand changed the sock game and now everyone's trying to jump on board.
Of course, I'm talking about Stance. Their creativity, design, quality have just ignited
a movement. If you're one of the millions who've already jumped on the Stance bandwagon,
you know what I'm talking about. They feel great and they look awesome. There are tons of styles to choose from. The designs are
crazy. It's more than just a comfortable sock. It is a look. They have partnered with the MLB.
They have partnered with Disney for Toy Story and Star Star Wars, and Marvel, they partner with Wu Tang, and Rick and Morty,
and the Grateful Dead, and Billie Eilish, and all sorts of literally the widest possible
variety of things you can even imagine.
It's a brand that not only feels good on your feet, not only looks good, but it'll
make your heart feel good too because of things like their annual socks for heroes which
sends fresh socks to deployed military that need them very badly it collaborates to raise money
with initiatives in africa or to help with california wildfire victims or breast cancer
awareness all these wonderful amazing things and that's what stance is about about giving back
so this holiday season if you want to feel good on your feet feel good in your heart stance is a
great way to go you can give them as gifts
to friends or to yourself. That's why
for you listening right now, we're going to give you one free pair
with purchase at stance.com
slash cox.
It's your standard bogo. You buy one, get one.
stance.com
slash cox
because if they're not stance,
they're just socks. Alright,
well, you know, Crandor, I think we should go to Chopped Copper 7th Sky.
Crandor, how's that traffic out there?
Oh, boy.
The traffic out here is actually kind of crazy.
It's starting to snow all over, and it's raining.
It's kind of icy.
It's getting kind of wonky all over.
So, honestly, put some fire strips on your tar.
Get that snow and ice burning away.
I think you can pick those up at Walmart or something, but, uh, you know, our lawyers
say I did not tell you that.
Back to you.
Did you just say put some fire strips on your tar?
On your, your car.
Like your car wheels.
I was like, what the hell is he talking about?
Put some fire strips on your tar?
wheels fire strips on your tar man that chicken sandwich f'd him up listen that Crandor didn't eat the sandwich I did that's top right right right I'm such a
fool yeah right you're the one who's really on point that another guy what a
what a goober. That's traffic.
Okay, let's go to weather.
All right, thank you.
Hey, welcome to the weather desk.
Today, we're going to be checking out some weather.
Let's go to, speaking of tar.
Tar, tarawa.
Tarawa, curabadi, curabadi.
Tarawa.
Tarawa, curabadi, curabadi.
So, in tarawa, it is 86 degrees.
Fair.
Feels like 97.
Ooh, it's getting hot.
81 degrees Fahrenheit.
Scattered thunderstorms tonight.
Put a coat on.
Variable clouds with scattered thunderstorms.
You got lows at 81.
Winds northeast at 5 to 10.
5 to 10 miles an hour.
You got a chance of rains up to 60%.
Ooh.
Watch out for that rain.
Where is South Tarawa?
Oh, my God.
It's like on an island in the middle of nowhere.
Or it is an island in the middle of nowhere.
Wait.
It could be both.
Where is this?
That's Karabani.
Oh, my God.
You have to look up South Tarawa.
It's literally in the middle of nowhere.
Did you?
Did you?
For the one person listening
from there, if that,
have you discovered Atlantis? South Tarawa?
Tarawa.
Wow, that was actually really easy to spell.
South Tarawa. It looks...
What is this place?
What is this place?
That's what I'm saying. That's what I was saying.
What have you discovered? Listen, That's what I'm saying. That's what I was saying. What have you discovered?
Listen, that's what I'm saying.
I think this is where, like, all the politicians go.
This is that island.
It's the capital and hub of the Republic of Kiribati?
Where's Kiribati?
Kiribati is a bunch of different islands out in the middle of literally nowhere.
It's sort of south of Hawaii?
It's like, wait wait the federated states of
micronesia oh okay kiribati a sovereign state in central pacific ocean population of 110 000
uh more than half live on tara atoll what the hell wow this place is so... Yeah, Crendor.
So, South Tarawa.
Basically, it's an island, but the inside of the island has been filled in with water.
What?
How do you fill an island with water?
Is it Fiji?
No, I mean, like, the inside of it is... What the hell?
What?
This is amazing so most people live on a little tiny strip of land
and it's surrounded by ocean on one side and the other side is sort of a
a micro ocean or an atoll as the kids would say wow that's so crazy we discovered a beautiful
place this is it's gorgeous looking oh yeah it's got like a little baby ocean side of the ocean.
Oh, my God.
That's so cool.
Right?
Look at this.
Also, speaking of Fiji, I clicked on it.
It has a huge trash problem.
And one of the things it shows is just a bunch of Fiji bottles.
That's a big oof, Johnson.
Yeah, it has a lagoon is the right word that I should be looking for.
It has a lagoon in the middle.
Oh, that's so neat.
Huh.
Wow, I wonder what is the city here?
What's the main city?
What's the main city?
What's the deal with the main city?
Oh, wow.
It's so neat looking.
Does it have, like, the University of the South Pacific, the House Assembly, the Roman Catholic Diocese?
What the hell?
Roman Catholic Diocese?
The area that, oh, my God, we may not even have one listener here.
We found the area that you mentioned has 50,000 people living in it.
Oh, my God.
It's like a suburb.
Wow!
It's so tiny, Crendor!
It's so tiny!
Wow.
I'm impressed.
We discovered something here today.
I've never even heard of this place.
It looks incredible.
I've never seen anything like it.
I don't know how you would get there.
I imagine in a very tiny plane.
No, no. We used the biggest plane
to get to South Tarawa.
One of those, like,
boat planes. Oh, I've never landed in a boat
plane. A boat plane, you say?
Yeah, you know the planes that got, like, boat legs?
What? That sounds weird.
You know, the plane with boat legs.
The plane with boat legs. Yeah.
The old boat leg plane. It's everyone's
favorite. Well, that was neat. I like
that. And that's the weather.
All right. Crandor,
let's go to sports. Sports.
We got some sports coming up
for you fresh off the presses. First
up, we have football.
Raiders took down the Chargers. Bears took
down the backup quarterback of the Lions.
The Ravens destroyed the sad, sad
Bengals. The Bills lost. The Ravens destroyed the sad, sad Bengals.
The Bills lost to the Browns in a sad state of Ohio.
Tennessee blocked a field goal to beat the Chiefs.
The Falcons beat the Saints somehow.
That's a weird one.
Jets beat the Giants in the Battle of the Bad New York teams.
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers beat the Cardinals. The Dolphins have somehow won again, beating the Colts.
I don't know how they're doing.
Yeah, man.
All over the internet, people were like, how did you lose to the Dolphins?
I don't know.
I mean, they did have their backup quarterback as well, so it's kind of better still.
Packers beat the Panthers in the Snow Bowl.
They've got a snow game going.
That's pretty fun.
Steelers beat the Rams.
Look at that.
It happened.
They're doing it. And Steelers beat the Rams look at that it happened they're doing it and the
Vikings beat the Cowboys uh so Gardner Minshew I believe was off this week and then tomorrow night
we got Seahawks and 49ers uh and then can I tell you that um my entire life I haven't caught up on
the finale of the good place all right but I'm so invested in something that I don't think will happen but needs to happen.
Okay.
One of the characters, Jason, he is obsessed with Blake Bortles.
And of course, when he is talking about him, the show started when he was still on the
Jacksonville Jaguars.
Yeah.
He is no longer on the Jaguars.
And so in this most recent season, one of the characters had to tell him that Blake Bortles was no longer on the Jaguars. Yeah. He is no longer on the Jaguars. And so in this most recent season, one of the characters had to tell him that Blake Bortles was no longer on the Jaguars.
I need, before the end of this show, a Minshew mention in the good place.
That saves Jason and teaches him the value of life and love.
It's like whenever God closes up Bortles, he opens a Minshew.
I'm invested.
I'm very invested.
Here's the thing.
Jaguars are on their bye week this week, and it appears that Nick Foles will be starting
for Minshew this week.
That's what I heard.
That's what I heard.
Man.
I don't like it.
I don't like it.
Damn.
Here's the thing.
People get hurt.
Things happen.
Accidents occur.
Minshew will be back. Minshew willidents occur. Minshew will be back.
Minshew will be back.
Minshew will be back.
I swear to God.
You better be.
Then all the other sports are pretty much the same.
Looks like Washington and St. Louis are the best in the NHL.
And then the NBA,'s like the Celtics,
Raptors,
Bucks,
and the Lakers,
Nuggets,
Rockets,
Mavs,
Jazz,
Suns,
Clipper.
Wow,
there's a lot of good Western teams.
And that's,
that's pretty much sports.
All right,
Crandor,
what is our big news story of the day?
You're looking for a big news story of the day.
Well, guess what?
Michigan man fights off home invader with replica battle axe.
Oh, my God.
Now, this is a story.
All right.
In Osh Timo Township, Michigan, a Michigan man who participates in mock fights using medieval weapons put his skills to use when he fought off an intruder.
Time out.
Time out.
Time out.
He's a LARPer, right?
We're just going gonna admit that instead of this bullshit they're like there's medieval battles like no he's throwing
beanbags going fireball fireball don't pretend don't pretend article yeah no he's a larper um
so he said i've got a double-headed carbon steel battle axe that was homemade by a gentleman who has since passed, Ben Ball told Wood.
That's what I call my baby.
Oh, no.
Ball, 36, was playing video games and watching Rick and Morty.
Of course he was.
He might be listening to this podcast right now.
This story checks out.
Everything about this checks out.
He definitely is a fan.
If I know our fans, he is one of them.
When Alex Lavelle Rawls kicked in his door around 11.30 p.m.,
door opened.
I grabbed the axe
then step step hit
there was a bloody mess everywhere
did he dark souls this shit
he's like did I step step hit
he sure was just playing the game
I love that he's like
I grabbed my battle axe
step step hit
he had it down
he knew the boss's fight mechanics.
He was ready to go.
Ball hit Rawls at least once in the torso with the weapon.
Then the two destroyed the apartment in the fight.
Rawls then fled.
Police and canine unit tracked a trail of blood and found Rawls.
He was taken to a hospital for treatment, then jailed.
Because he hit him in the torso with anls. He was taken to a hospital for treatment and jail.
He hit him with an axe!
Pfft!
Um...
This feels like a fake story, but it's
not. It's like from an actual
Atlanta journal or something.
Alright, what happened?
Was he like... Well, here we go. Rawls was looking for
his ex-girlfriend, Ball's roommate,
who was not there when he kicked the door go. Rawls was looking for his ex-girlfriend, Ball's roommate, who was not there
when he kicked the door in.
Rawls was released from Michigan Department of Correction
in July.
Rawls was arrested and charged
with first-degree home invasion.
He has considerable practice with the Axe.
Ball does.
He participates in mock battles
using an array of weapons
when he's not at Applebee's.
Shut up.
There's no way. Shut up. There's no way.
Shut up.
Oh my God.
This can't be real.
Oh my God.
All right.
There's a video.
Of what?
Him.
How is there a video?
It's a video of him.
Doing what?
Holding his axe.
He's got a Star Wars shirt on.
Oh my God.
This guy, he could be me.
Krendor, this could be me in another life.
Oh my God. No. This is fake. could be me. Krendor, this could be me in another life. Oh, my God.
No.
This is fake.
This is fake.
He's wearing a Star Wars shirt but a hat from, oh, Firefly.
He's got a beard that looks like he's Gandalf.
The dude, but he also shaved his mustache.
He's got a battle sword.
Shut up.
Get out of town with this.
No.
No.
It shows him.
He goes, step, step.
He's reenacting it.
And then it's like bleeding.
The criminal escaped the premises.
There's like a blood trail.
Like, this guy actually killed a dude.
This guy.
Wow.
I've never seen anything like this.
They even show a pool of blood from where this guy hit this guy with an axe.
Get out of town.
This is the silliest thing I've ever seen, but it's totally real.
I know. out of town this is the silliest thing i've ever seen but it's totally real i know it's this is like a legit fake news story that became real and i don't know if we're living in an alternate
timeline or not can i tell you the best part the last paragraph the last paragraph well number one
it's not live action role play bald told w o o. A lot of people are like, oh, it's LARPing.
No.
This bandaid was actually from filming last night for our newest episode.
Wait.
Unreal.
Their newest episode?
What's he filming?
He makes videos showing off how weapons are used, I guess.
Huh.
This is such a weird.
This is so weird.
Like all these events lining up perfectly.
I can't even believe this.
All right.
I mean, that is the story.
That's a good-ass story.
That's a great alliance warrior for our Florida men.
Oh, my God.
LARPing man.
Yeah, that guy.
But he shows up, and he's like, it's not LARPing.
He's like, whatever you say, LARPing man.
Damn it, Florida man.
Wow.
LARPing man with his battle axe.
Thank you, Sailor Sammy, for giving us that one.
Wow, that was a great story.
All right, well, that's it for us.
Thank you so much for listening
or watching or however you
are enjoying this podcast.
Crendor, hit them with those socials.
We've got some socials for you.
All right, go to youtube.com
slash coxandcrendorpodcast,
all one word.
You can listen to all these podcasts
nonstop if you want on YouTube.
You can also go to SoundCloud,
Spotify, iTunes. We're everywhere, almost. Also also go to soundcloud spotify itunes we're
everywhere almost also go to youtube.com slash cox and crendor there's a new animation it's great
dan made it it's literally just the same as the podcast but without the podcast at the end for the
url also go see our stuff go to youtube.com slash wow crendor you'll see my me eating a chicken
sandwich uploaded go to youtube.com you won't see a chicken sandwich but you'll see me eating a chicken sandwich uploaded. Go to YouTube.com. You won't see a chicken sandwich, but you'll see him yelling at video games.
Go to our Twitches.
Twitch.tv.
Twitter.
I don't know what I'm saying.
Twitter.com.
I'm malfunctioning.
He's coming down from that chicken high.
He's coming down.
He's scratching hard, everybody.
Tell your friends.
Tell your mom.
Tell your grandma.
Tell your wife.
Tell your husband.
Tell your dog.
Tell your cat.
Tell your local Popeyes employees.
Tell.
All right.
We'll see you guys next time.
And as always, to be continued.