Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 267 - The Ring Dinger

Episode Date: December 14, 2020

It's that time again, where Crendor shares exactly how he's falling apart in ways no one thought possible. This week he's go to get his back looked at and quickly the conversation devolves into the cr...aziest youtube description ever in the history of youtube. Also ASMR. Yep, it's that kind of episode. It's time for an all new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://meundies.com/crendor to get 15% off your first order and free shipping!

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Today's episode is brought to you by MeUndies. MeUndies. Oh, those undies that I've got on me. Actually, I'm not even wearing MeUndies right now. I'm wearing MeUndie, you know, like their, like, pants? Oh, yeah. I don't even got any of the undies on. I just went straight to the sweats.
Starting point is 00:00:17 I'm good, baby. Yeah, you're feeling it. Yeah, I'm feeling it. We'll talk about that probably too much later. Let's jump into this podcast. Hello, everybody. It's time for Ghost on Trend Dog. This is Trend Dog in the morning.
Starting point is 00:00:33 In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. In 4-hour recording studio. Recording. Hit me. Wake your ass up. It's the Kax and Kreda in the morning. Hello, everybody.
Starting point is 00:00:56 Welcome to an exciting episode of Kax and Kreda in the morning. Woo. That is the least excited a person could ever pretend to be. Woo. I mean, I can do better. Yeah? Let's hear your least excited a person could ever pretend to be. I can do better. Yeah? Let's hear your least excited. No, you're faking it. Give me least excited.
Starting point is 00:01:14 That's a little better. That's a little better. You're like, yeah, great. Wow. Yay. All right. All right. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:01:26 Let me update you on the dental adventures. Yes, I can't wait to hear. Are you fully recovered? I'd say I'm doing a lot better compared to this. Okay, hit me. So last week, if you didn't hear, I had tooth pain radiating into my head. Very bad. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:48 Eight or nine out of ten pain. It was a bad time. So go listen to that if you want. But I was like, all right, going to the dentist tomorrow. So that night, more pain. Woke up after a couple hours sleep. Took an Advil. Still in pain.
Starting point is 00:02:04 And it was like 8. a.m and I was like I'm gonna see if the dentist is open if they can take me earlier than like 4 30 and they were and they're like we can take you at noon and I was like yes so at noon went to the dentist like all right let's take a look and uh they're like oh yeah you're gonna you're gonna need a root canal so they uh they did the root canal honestly Why did we Diagnose that faster than the dentist did Well
Starting point is 00:02:31 I mean technically we didn't Because the night before Or the night of I called him about it And he was like yeah you probably need a root canal All I'm saying is you saw two dentists And they both gave you the wrong diagnosis The minute you said stuff I was like You just need a root canal. All I'm saying is you saw two dentists and they both gave you the wrong diagnosis. The minute you said stuff, I was like, you just need a root canal.
Starting point is 00:02:49 Yeah, well I guess because the x-rays didn't show anything. Well, they relied on technology and not their doctor intuition. You gotta rely on that doctor intuition. You gotta rely on the doctor intuition. Alright, here's the part. I'm sitting down in the chair. He's like, alright, let's get
Starting point is 00:03:03 this going. He's like, nah, I gotta warn you. And'm sitting down in the chair. He's like, all right, let's get this going. He's like, no, I got to warn you. And I'm like, oh, God. He's like, there's a chance the tooth is fractured. And he's like, if the tooth is fractured, then we have to extract it. And I'm just like, eh. Okay. Yeah. Do what you got to do, doc.
Starting point is 00:03:24 So I'm like, all right. But but he's like if that's the case then when you get this root canal it's you're still gonna be in pain and then after a couple days we'll extract it because uh you know if the tooth is actually fractured then the root's not causing the problems you'll still be in pain i was like all right so i was just upset so i'm like do i gotta go through like another couple days of pain for this? But about like I took an Advil after I had the root canal done. Honestly, not a bad process. I like they numb you up.
Starting point is 00:03:54 You just kind of chill there. Doesn't really get a needle to the to the gums. Yeah, I gave me like three. Oh, that's the good stuff. I know. Here's the thing. People always worry about a needle in your mouth, but I'm gonna let you know out of all the needle shots I've ever gotten.
Starting point is 00:04:10 Not the worst, not the worst. No, it's just like a little pinch. You're kind of like, and then it goes away real quick. Yeah, it's real quick.
Starting point is 00:04:20 Had that. And that just, you know, you feel them working in your root and they're just like going to need a millimeter 22 millimeter and i'm like all right uh and then after that they're like all right we're all done looks good uh it should get better and then i was like all right and then about four or five hours later after i took my advil i was like hey i realize i'm not in pain and then like 10 hours go by and i'm like, I still don't need an Advil. And then I tried eating like some bread on it,
Starting point is 00:04:49 like something soft, and I could chew on it. And I'm like, dude, nice. And then ever since then, it's been just getting better every day. Now it's like I can honestly eat on it, drink, you know, do whatever. That's great.
Starting point is 00:05:05 I'm glad you got that fixed. Yeah, the power of modern dentistry. Who knew? The power of modern dentistry. And you don't have to sit through pain. Yeah, I cannot stress it enough. Out of all the doctors, I value the dentist the most. Because I use this damn thing way too much.
Starting point is 00:05:25 So, dude, tooth pain, mouth pain, that shit's that shit's real. The only yeah, the only pain that I think is equal is probably like ball pain. You guys know what I mean? Like some days you're like, what the hell happened down there? Yeah, it's the only equal equivalent I can think of personally. Yeah. Like I've had stomach pains and like other stuff, but like usually it's not like debilitating. I'm just kind of like, you know, maybe if I've heard gallbladder pain, like when you
Starting point is 00:05:58 actually get it, it's really bad. I got mine out before any of that happened. And then, you know, it was a good time. So I did that, and then he gave me antibiotics. So I got like three of them left and done tomorrow. Well, speaking of pain, I got sympathy pains from you, I think. I don't know what happened. After we had our conversation talking about mouth pain last week,
Starting point is 00:06:23 went to bed, woke up, my tooth hurt. And I was like, why is this happening? Am I having like, instead of pregnancy sympathy pains, I'm having like a tooth, I guess maybe thinking about it. I don't know what happened, man. I woke up and my tooth hurt for two days. And it wasn't like a bad pain. I could eat with it.
Starting point is 00:06:45 But like something about it was a little tender. And I couldn't figure out what it was. And it was immediately after we had the conversation. I was like, am I? Yeah. I was like, am I connected to Crendor in some way? Yeah. Then it went away.
Starting point is 00:06:59 And I'm fine. But it was so weird. It just happened. I don't know if maybe because we had the conversation when I was dreaming, I was maybe grinding my teeth or thinking about it. I have no clue what started it. Couldn't tell you. It was weird.
Starting point is 00:07:10 I woke up the next day like, oh, come on. You can't be serious. Maybe it's, I mean, did you eat any sugar or anything? Nothing? I don't remember. I mean, no. I'm trying to be very good about sugar. Uh, I don't remember. I mean, no, I'm trying to be very good about sugar. Uh, I, even today, because I was at the store and was like, I need an energy drink, but I don't want to get like
Starting point is 00:07:31 something with sugar. So I got a non, I got a sugar-free energy drink and that's a, it's terrible. But, uh, I wanted something cold and not coffee. So that's what I got. Any temperature. Any temperature. I'm not a big cold coffee drinker. I don't know why. I don't like cold brew coffee, really. But if my coffee, I'm drinking it, and I brew it hot and it gets cold, I'll keep drinking it.
Starting point is 00:08:03 I mean, I will usually have had mine before. If I have coffee that gets too cold or starts to become chilled, I'll drink all of it real quick. Rather than have like room temp coffee, I'm like, no, this will not do. I'd rather chug it. Yeah. No, no, no. I brew my black coffee in the morning, drink it. Sometimes it gets a little cold. I'm like, yeah, it's still good.
Starting point is 00:08:25 And my afternoon cup of coffee, I'm like, yeah, it's still good. Oh, my God. So I forgot to mention that last week I saw a chiropractor. What is happening to you? So last week I fell apart. Listen, I was in so much pain. I was like, screw it. I'll try a chiropractor.
Starting point is 00:08:44 I don't even believe in chiropractors. What is happening? So your tooth was bad and your back was bad. Well, I thought it was my TMJ, right? Okay. That was my instinctual thought. And they're like, oh, it's all tied into your neck and shoulders and everything. So I was like, all right, you know, I'll see what happens.
Starting point is 00:09:00 And so they're like, all right, yeah, we'll take a look at you. And he's looking at my back and he's like oh yeah it's tight up here in your suboccipitals uh super tight and i would say this is tight and like right here and do this thing and i was like all right all right and then uh i was like all right it's like here's the thing so many people i know like people go to chiropractors my one friend goes to a chiropractor. He's like, I love it. It fixes my stuff. I don't believe super hard into it.
Starting point is 00:09:31 What do you mean by believe? What happens at a chiropractor that requires your belief? The fact that they just pop your joints and you're good to go. All right. Yeah, I understand that. To me, it's kind of like a... What are those things they pick with the prins? What the hell did I just say?
Starting point is 00:09:50 They prick you with the prins. They prick you... Not pick you with the prins. They prick you with the pins. Whatever that is. Acupuncture. Acupuncture, thank you, yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:00 Yeah, I imagine that's one of those things where there's a little bit of belief in it as well. Like, oh yeah, so you've unlocked my chakra. Yeah, I think there is a placebo effect. I don't know. Sure. I mean, it's possible it works. But here's the thing.
Starting point is 00:10:13 We're going to get a message one way or the other real quick. Oh, yeah. Someone's going to be like, I've been taking acupuncture for 14 years and going to a chiropractor. Right. I get it. Okay. So he's like, all right, we'll just adjust you a bit and then i'll give you some stretches i'm like okay so then you lay down and by the way prior to this there's like
Starting point is 00:10:34 people just walking in uh like somebody they'd walk in they got their mask on they do their little scan and then they just walk back three minutes you hear like and they walk out i was like what the shit so what's going on in there but the guy before me he was like yo you forgot to do my hip and so he was like all right and then he i just hear like the table like kind of and he was like oh shit he's walked out kind of like whoa if that's what i heard when i went to any practitioner of anything if i heard someone go oh shit i'd be like no i can't do this no thank you Oh, shit. Oh, my God. So the first thing.
Starting point is 00:11:28 So the first. Oh, my God. So I walk back there. I forgot to mention this at the start. You'll love this one. So I go back, and the guy's like, hey, how's it going? He's like, I'd shake your hand, but some manby-pamby on Yelp got mad at us. Great.
Starting point is 00:11:42 You're in good hands. You're already in good hands. He's like said i guess we can't shake hands anymore i was like all right so you know meanwhile when i like go to the actual doctor they come in like decked out and like super medical gear so i'm like all right Are you saying this guy's not an actual doctor? Crazy. So he's like, all right. So he's like, we'll do a couple adjustments. Oh, shit. So he's like, just lay it out and breathe in and then just breathe out.
Starting point is 00:12:20 And I breathe out. And then he just went like, ugh, into my back. And I was like, ugh. And it just, it's was like what does that mean he went and you went like he crunched it he's like crunched my spine like in my middle back and he's like oh people love that one and i was like oh i wouldn't say i loved it And then Did it hurt? What happened? What was your reaction? It didn't hurt It didn't feel bad It just felt weird
Starting point is 00:12:53 And then he was like Alright and then he did like a A shoulder one Another shoulder one Or he just does a like And then like a He did like two head ones and i was like nope never again uh and then i was like so when when do people start feeling better it's like
Starting point is 00:13:13 some people feel better like right away and i was like yeah it's not it's not it's not happening are you telling me you weren't feeling great so so So he's like, then I'm going to give you, here's some exercises to do. All right, here's some exercises. So he's like, you push your head to the right with your hand to stretch it. And then you do like some, essentially just gave me like a bunch of yoga stretches to do that they give you in like physical therapy. So I went to physical therapy like two years ago. And he literally just gave me like physical therapy exercises. And so he's like, yeah, just keep doing your exercises and keep coming back in for adjustments like a couple times a week never went back that's the couple times a week thing sounds like a scam
Starting point is 00:13:57 even i don't know the minute again never should anyone go to a medical professional and then be like, oh, shit. That sounds like that guy was in pain not being helped. But here's the thing. All the reviews online, people are like, got in a car accident. This guy saved my life. All this stuff. And I'm like, maybe it works. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:14:20 Maybe I'm just an outlier. Maybe this doesn't work for me. You're just too tense, man. You're just maybe I'm two tents uptight yeah but like yeah like to me it was just this the stretches are what's gonna fix everything like maybe if it's something where they have like maybe accidents and actual spinal issues you need it but like as it didn't do anything for me to me it's the equivalent of like do your stretches and drink this apple juice. And you're like, wow,
Starting point is 00:14:45 this apple juice and stretching is really helping me. Like, it could be literally anything. That's like when you see a diet pill commercial. It's like, with exercise and proper nutrition. It's like, well, that's the whole point. Yeah. Your pill's doing nothing now. If it's like, if you just exercise and eat properly,
Starting point is 00:15:03 this pill will help you lose weight. And you're like, wait a minute. So, you know, I guess that was what that was like a little over like nine days ago or something. And like, you know, I think the problem was hurting. It was like a few days before that. So I was hoping that would help my TMJ. I mean, overall, the problem was I needed a root canal. Right, okay.
Starting point is 00:15:30 So that was the main thing. So that was my chiropractor adventure. Don't think I'm going to go back. I mean, if somebody says it works for them, that's fine. I'm not going to be like, no, ban the chiropractor, but just it didn't work for me. I don't think I could handle that very well i want to be in a doctor's office that smells like a doctor's office you know what i mean yeah you know what i'm saying like if your doctor's office doesn't smell like like it's been triple sanitized i don't know that i if it smells like uh incense
Starting point is 00:16:01 i don't know that i trust you as a doctor. It needs to smell real sanitized. Oh, yeah. So I've been, here's the thing, I started looking up chiropractor videos on YouTube. Wait, why? How? Okay, alright, take me down this rabbit hole. Because I'm just curious. So, there's a
Starting point is 00:16:19 couple chiropractors that are, like, notable on YouTube. There's one guy who... What is his channel name? I'm just hoping that it's something like Backcracker. Advanced Chiropractic Relief LLC. Never mind. That's not cool at all.
Starting point is 00:16:39 And he invented the Ring Dinger. Never mind. He's back to being very cool. So if you look up the Ring Dinger, it's this dude and he just wraps a towel. Why am I looking up the Ring dinger never mind he's back to being very cool so if you look up the ring dinger it's this dude and he just why am i looking at the ring dinger right now come on now he wraps a towel around their neck and then he just goes oh and like yanks them up what the hell this is so this oh my god oh my god oh my god if i got that done i would die how is this this is insane yeah that's what i'm saying and it's like both ways there's people who are like oh my god that's
Starting point is 00:17:18 the greatest thing anyone's ever done to me and then there's other people who are like no like it is no in between none of this looks like it's helpful i want there's other people who are like, no, like it is no in between. None of this looks like it's helpful. I want, there's this one woman who was like, she's in pain. That's the one I want to see. Oh yeah. What? Okay. I don't want this.
Starting point is 00:17:39 So there is a video right now. It's powerful ring dinger. Emotional release back Back Pain and Migraine is the name of this video. And it's this woman who's come in to see him and this guy's talking to her and the first couple minutes they're talking about all this stuff. Then
Starting point is 00:17:55 there is from I don't know, almost nine minutes until it's still going. Maybe 11, 12 minutes. It's just him touching her back and butt. Oh, yeah. And he's, like, looking at her butt, and he's, like, so you got the butt right here.
Starting point is 00:18:13 I'm, like, what the hell is happening? I swear, half the chiropractor videos are just, like, girls in yoga pants. It's thumbnail. Yes, it's just, like, a girl in yoga pants. And he's, like, looking at her tattoos and her tattoos and her back piercings and her butt. And then he's like, okay, so we're going to just do all this stuff to you right here. Oh, yeah. Is that the chiropractor medicine guy?
Starting point is 00:18:36 Yes, chiropractor medicine. Okay, yeah. I've been watching a lot of his, too. He's just this bald dude with a beard, and he does weird noises. He's like. dude with a beard and he does like weird noises he's like i don't this this guy makes me uncomfortable though because this guy looks like he definitely is in that chiropractor porn stuff you and the internet knows what i'm talking about like the masseuse like he looks like it and the way he's just like massaging this poor girl he's he's like all right so lift your legs up and i'm
Starting point is 00:19:01 just gonna rub the inner thigh here like what are you doing when i watched is this guy and he's like working on this playboy model and her boyfriend's just sitting there looking like the shit is going on that's what it looks like it's crazy looking i now if i watch this dude if i ever date anyone who's like i'm gonna go see chiropractic medicine guy i'll be like, oh, hell no. You're going to find someone else. Thank you very much. That guy is a pervert. This dude is a 30-minute video, and most of these 30 minutes, he's just rubbing on this girl.
Starting point is 00:19:35 I don't know. She's getting an end relief. I don't know what's happening here. But I got to the 30 minutes and 32 seconds. He finally is rapping. Again, what Crandor's describing is they wrap a towel around someone's neck. Yeah. And then they strangle them to death.
Starting point is 00:19:52 It's possible. I can't even with this. You know what? Here's the thing. What do the comments say? You know what? These are great comments. All right.
Starting point is 00:20:05 Here's the amazing number one comment. He walks away after each crack like he dropped the mic. He really does. You got to respect it. Yeah. Another one. This man steps back from every adjustment like he hit a three. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:20:34 Yeah. However, no one seems to think. Oh, never mind. I was about to say, no one seems to think that this is pervy. I scrolled down far enough. Never mind. It's in there. There are people
Starting point is 00:20:45 oh yeah someone was like i think i've seen this dude in the porn i mean he looks like this whole video looks like the start of the first five minutes he's like all right so let's get that shirt off like what okay sure my dude uh wow i didn't know this was a thing. The crazy part is there's so many videos. And what's wild is it's very obvious they know their audience and their thumbnails. Because the first, the Yes Sir Ring Dinger Chiropractic video, the number one thing when I searched, the thumbnail is a woman. But when you mouse over it and it shows you the clip, it's a dude. And if you scroll down to the epic ring dingers,
Starting point is 00:21:32 the thumbnail is a woman, but when you mouse over it, it's a totally different woman. When, get the decibel meter ring dinger compilation 4, which is also hilarious, the thumbnail, young woman. When you mouse over it, like, I donilation 4, which is also hilarious. The thumbnail, young woman. When you mouse over it, like, I don't know, 50-year-old dude.
Starting point is 00:21:50 What the shh? Yeah, they've got it figured out. These guys got it figured out. Okay, go back to the back pain and migraine video. Okay? And look at the description. Oh, no. Oh, no. Where is this thing at? Back you need a migraine you need to look at the
Starting point is 00:22:07 description the one we just saw yes all right here we go what the hell wait what that's what i'm saying wait what i don't all right everyone i'm just gonna read I don't know what The hell this means and now I feel Like are we Did we discover something Crandor Um Okay location This is the actual verbatim
Starting point is 00:22:39 Description of this video Location Mechanicsburg PA condenser microphone cracks and crunches. Quiet face paper and quiet office, equal ASMR. Mindfully placed ads, relax. Chiropractic sleep time remedy, elegant storytelling. Ghost parade. One night, I was having a dream that I was eating birthday cake with a grasshopper wearing a valet uniform.
Starting point is 00:23:09 Then I woke up to the blasting bellows of what I assumed to be another black cricket, like the one mentioned two weeks ago, somewhere inside my room. The initial search via iPhone flashlight failed, and I was feeling frustrated. If this cricket wakes up my children, it's over. The whole day, it's just done. Frantic, perhaps approximates the sentiment. Of course, this influenced the perception of the cricket volume getting louder, moving swiftly like a ninja in the night.
Starting point is 00:23:33 I began moving medium-sized objects out of the path towards the source of the sound, and when I got there, the cricket jumped to the other side of the room, louder. At first, I thought it was a ghost. Then, no, that's silly. There's just two of them. Two ghosts, I realize?
Starting point is 00:23:50 Louder. In another corner. Almost got it. Vanished again. Come on, Brent, focus. Is it healthy to speak to myself like that? You're being ridiculous. We're fine.
Starting point is 00:24:01 The sound was like a siren singing an ominous song of insanity. Hitchcock hallows E-violin shrill under the bed. My lips almost touch the ground. Head turning to the side. Stuffed deep in the corner. Wiggling, squiggling. Dust kisses. I've got to focus.
Starting point is 00:24:22 But who is this I anyway? The sound vanished again. Fuck it. I'm sleeping on the couch. I've got yoga in two hours. Never fell asleep. Yoga at 5am. It's moments like this that I feel utterly grateful that chiropractic is my drug. Regardless of what happens outside of adjusting hours,
Starting point is 00:24:43 from the time someone is down on the table until the time they leave i'm in a different reality like during this video which might be one of my all-time favorites i will take any opportunity possible to talk about uh the natural child what the to talk about natural childbirth because if there's one institution that should incite massive positive change in the US healthcare system, it's how we treat pregnancy. Many hospitals seem to be operating from a different reality.
Starting point is 00:25:12 And the temperature reading? This time, it was dampness bringing us into the same region that the instrument read. And if you've been watching closely, we've previously lined up the instrument with either the tone or digital temp reading too. I could spiral
Starting point is 00:25:28 into this concept for 5k characters, but we've got to find out what happened to those crickets. The L5 sacrum debate here reminded me of something recently where the sacrum kept interrupting the staggering voice of L5. After the adjustment,
Starting point is 00:25:44 I'm still not sure which one was the primary. JK, I know. My hope for this episode is that the funny timestamp guy identifies when I did a Thanos-style cervical adjustment at 2332. In reality, I was cracking my fingers. There is enough content here to make two videos. I really appreciate that she was verbally confirming what I was identifying with my hands almost instantaneously. The prone TL palpitation and left cervical come to mind.
Starting point is 00:26:18 Oh my god, it's still going! How is this? This is insane. I can't. And the pubic adjustment. I actually edited out the part where I said, I never show this because the internet can't handle it. We shall see.
Starting point is 00:26:34 And the ring dinger. Probably the best one I've recorded thus far. And I sang to the competitive singer. The day after the cricket cacophony and reduced rest, I sought counsel from Aaron, the office manager Jedi. After conveying my concern for the cricket's community breeding events occurring in my bedroom, she wisely advised the following. First, get a frog to find the cricket. Then, get a snake to seek the frog. Finally, a mongoose to maul the snake. Me.
Starting point is 00:27:04 Then what do I do with the mongoose? Aaron replied, keep it as a pet. After that, I rescued two crickets per day for five days. Then the oracle that is Google said that this species lay about ten eggs per laying. And then I saw eleven and twelve, which means we have reached a second laying. After yoga, I briefly fell... This is still going! After yoga, I briefly fell back asleep and into dream reality.
Starting point is 00:27:33 I was sitting with the grasshopper who was now wearing a monocle and asked, whose birthday is it? And where are you going with my car? 4,400 words out of 5,000. Thanks for watching powerful ring dinger emotional release. Back pain, migraine, chiropractic, and some heart attack. And thanks for reading this week's prescription description.
Starting point is 00:27:55 Or was it description prescription? Speaking of weird things to say, I say and do, backyard garden soul releasing update. If you've been reading these rants for long enough You know what I'm talking about You're cool and I love you I've been out four times Now each time the mass
Starting point is 00:28:14 Of lost energy decreases So either souls are crossing over Or my subscription to reality has changed 5k Oh shit what a journey changed 5k well that i might start doing this in my youtube just ramble do you think it helps that he filled 5 000 words there's got to be a reason right this is a guy who's got Ring Dinger as a registered trademark. Okay, this guy knows what he's doing. I can't believe that he wrote.
Starting point is 00:28:50 Is this? I need to go. Is this every video? Oh, no. This is his very most recent video. Wait, hold on. That can't be right. Oh, maybe it is.
Starting point is 00:28:59 Oh, oh, oh. It's season nine. Season nine? Well, one of his first videos, season nine, four months ago. That's so funny. The video is entitled, Augmentation Back Pain Finally Got a Breath of Air. My Body Exploded Chiropractor ASMR. Sure.
Starting point is 00:29:18 Again, his description reads, Location, Mechanicsburg, PA. Condenser microphone. Capt capture cracks and crunches, quiet face paper and quiet office for ASMR, mindfully placed ads for relaxers, engaging stories of pain relief, powerful, elegant, original content. Little Hawk.
Starting point is 00:29:38 Chickadee, dee, dee, dee, dee! Oh my god I can't with this This part is Is he still doing it What's even crazier Is that he has an entire Like
Starting point is 00:29:56 I don't He has an entire thing here He even has a Like They're feeling better Set free Fly away my little chickadee I said not a word to
Starting point is 00:30:05 the bird i thought in my mind and envisioned his kind on the end of my rake in my hand a whistle was heard and the bird had concurred because he leapt on the rake as i planned this is i don't under i can't this entire thing this one's written almost like a poem. Each line is maybe three words long. Yeah, I need to know what he's doing when he writes these. Like, is he high off his line? Drugs, I would assume, yeah. I don't. Like, the other guy, the other Mike Morhaime ring dinger man,
Starting point is 00:30:42 he's just got, like, you're Houston chiropractor, Dr. Gregory Johnson, visit our website and here's stuff. He's got a normal one. But that's not fun. This guy, this guy's crazy. So yeah, that's his. After that, I started looking up all these chiropractor videos and I was like, what the shit is going on on YouTube? Well, who knows anymore? That's for sure.
Starting point is 00:31:05 Who knows? Maybe we should just become chiropractic YouTubers. I don't think that's wise. That's the first person we bring in. It's like their neck snaps. Like, uh. Uh-oh. They're like on the table like, kill me.
Starting point is 00:31:23 What have we done, Grendor? Finish it. For the week, you should comment in the comments section if you've been to a chiropractor and if it helped you or not. Yes. We definitely need to know. Yeah. I don't know. I don't think I'd ever go.
Starting point is 00:31:40 I'd rather just go to a masseuse and get like rubbed on a bit. That seems better. Yeah. Or maybe it's one of those things where like there are Like some good ones and there's a lot of bad ones Or something, I don't know, just comment I want to read them Alright, well, speaking of good ones
Starting point is 00:31:53 Let's talk about the best ones Me undies, that's the segue Me undies The holiday season can be stressful, right? You gotta release that back pain, right? You know, it all checks out If only there was some bearded man out there can be stressful, right? You gotta release that back pain, right? You know, it all checks out. Yeah. If only there was some bearded man out there willing to give you a bottomless bag
Starting point is 00:32:10 of everything you need to cross off your list. Thankfully, I'm around and that's pretty close. And our friends at MeUndies have the next best thing. MeUndies curated a list of stuff you're gonna love, but more importantly, your friends and family are going to love, that are going to soften up all your holiday stress. Their micro-modal fabric is not only super soft, but breathable, light, and impossibly cozy.
Starting point is 00:32:37 It's everything you need for a stress-free and comfortable holiday. This is your chance to get those oh so good me undies PJ sets Slippers, shirts The sweats like I have on right now The, oh my god Men, women Sizes Extra small to 4XL There's so much there
Starting point is 00:32:58 And the designs are great, they have holiday designs right now If you want to get crazy with it Or you can go simple, that's cool too Also, if you want, you can gift a membership with the MeUndies gift card or become a member yourself. A membership subscription will send you a new pair to your door every month. You get site-wide savings, exclusive sales. But if you don't want a membership and you just want to try it,
Starting point is 00:33:21 MeUndies has a great offer for you. Same offer we always have. If you're a first-time purchaser, you get 15% off and free shipping. just want to try it, MeUndies has a great offer for you. Same offer we always have. If you're a first-time purchaser, you get 15% off and free shipping. Give it a shot. They have a problem-free philosophy. If you're not satisfied with the product in any way, they'll refund it or exchange it. No caveats, no questions, no nothing. And because it's free shipping, you don't lose anything if you don't like it.
Starting point is 00:33:44 But trust me, you're going to like it. It's not even going to be a question. If you want to check it out, if you want to jump on this train, or if you want to get a good gift for friends and family, go to meundies.com slash Crendor. That's meundies.com slash Crendor. That's me. All right, Crendor, let's go.
Starting point is 00:34:01 Chopped up something. This guy's Crendor. How's that traffic out there? Oh, man. I'm up here in the chapter copter and You know sometimes it's just nice to be up here alone in the chopper copter I've said this before but you know everybody's will meditative time And mine is up here in the chopper copter even though you do have the constant and mine is up here in the chopper copter even though you do have the constant
Starting point is 00:34:24 sounds but you know sometimes those can be therapeutic you know it's kind of like white noise so you need some white noise to fall asleep which I actually do the other night it was like quiet and I couldn't handle it I needed to put on like a podcast or something I gotta have that white noise otherwise
Starting point is 00:34:40 I don't know what it is I don't know back to you thanks Crandor I do too if I'm alone in bed I need Otherwise, I don't know what it is. I don't know. Back to you. Thanks, Crandor. I do too. If I'm alone in bed, I need any type of podcast or maybe turning on a fan. Honestly, it's because I lived in New York. And having noise, where I lived was on a major street. So you would hear outside at all hours
Starting point is 00:35:08 and so here in la i don't live near that anymore and so i it's very quiet um the only noise we hear usually there's only two noises one when i first moved here those are the birds that sounded like the joker um but i don't live near that anymore yeah the only other noise are seals humping at night which is like great hilarious like oh oh but you're like god damn get it dog um but it you know you have to have your window open and sometimes i'm like you know what window closed and then it's silent i'm like okay oh no i gotta have a fan or something on. I don't know. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:48 Or I'll listen to a podcast but put it really low because I'm also trying to sleep. So I can barely hear it, but I'm like, that will deafen the silence. Oh, yeah. No, it's, I got to have that or even, like, I'll usually put on some ASMR or something. Pancakes. Now I've been listening to Ting Ting ASMRr i don't even know what that is she is just this one girl that just makes sounds and she'll just you know it's very quiet and soft and you just hear like and then it's just like and it's enough to where i'm like what is that sound and i try to figure out what it is, and I'm like, I don't know, and then I fall asleep.
Starting point is 00:36:25 Ooh, ooh, I forgot to bring this up. I found this girl on YouTube that does ASMR videos. The last time we were talking about ASMR. And I just totally forgot to bring her up to you. But I am fascinated by her. And also a little bit in love. I was looking through her ASMR stuff recently. I don't remember how. I think it, it like popped up for a reason that i can't
Starting point is 00:36:47 remember but i went down the rabbit hole not because i want to see asmr but because again she's gorgeous and i was like holy moly this woman's beautiful and i was like what is she up to and uh in the time that we talked about when i we first found her, she had no subscribers. Yeah. Let me just, now has 1.35 million. I was like, cool, cool, cool, cool. Once again, reminding me that I am pathetic compared to these people. But I was like, all right, what is going on with her views? Like, how is she doing? What's happening?
Starting point is 00:37:21 I will let you know that the ASMR game is... I don't know. I should have gotten into this. Maybe I'm not an attractive enough person, but just to rattle off some numbers for you. 6.7 million, 6.4 million, 4.5 million, 4.2 million, 3.8 million. Her first... Oh my god, so many videos. Her first full page of videos when you search, like, by numbers are all a million plus.
Starting point is 00:37:54 Oh my god. She's killing it. This girl's killing it. And it is mind-blowing. Although, it's not. Because one, she's doing things like, you know, very high level. But also, production value is great. And also, again, no matter what people tell you about ASMR, there is a little sexuality to it.
Starting point is 00:38:15 Don't even, like, no one can pretend. I'm not, I'm simply going to just send this to you, Crandor. This is, this is who she is. And I want you, just without even giving out the name, just look and tell me she's not gorgeous. Oh, wow. Yeah. Yeah. And not in that YouTube, like, oh, she's attractive.
Starting point is 00:38:37 Like, legitimate, beautiful way. Yes. Like, it's unfair. It's simply unfair to the rest of us. I'm like, well, this doesn't seem fair. This girl's killing it's unfair. It's simply unfair to the rest of us. I'm like, this doesn't seem fair. This girl's killing it. Yeah. Her videos are crazy.
Starting point is 00:38:53 I will say, though, thankfully, there appears to be some justice in the world. Her very, like, you know, the very first ones four years ago, right? The videos are ASMR fixing you, right right like you're a robot and i'm fixing you up or asmr medical exam or asmr uh soft sleeping treatment or asmr doctor asmr scout all those things right and then you realize after a while you have to change up You have to change up ASMR And so Yeah Because after You can only fix a person
Starting point is 00:39:28 So many times Or talk to them in French So many times Or all that stuff Oh yeah So She also does things That are like
Starting point is 00:39:37 ASMR Pennywise Kidnaps you ASMR Medusa Catches you Her most recent ones This shit's so funny to me Her most recent ones This shit's so funny to me Her most recent ones include ASMR devil welcomes you to hell
Starting point is 00:39:50 I can't believe it Yeah you have to figure After a certain amount of time You're like what the hell do I do What do I Oh my god it's so funny Yeah it's like you run out of ideas And then you just gotta start winging it
Starting point is 00:40:08 But, but With that said, oh my god, I love the internet So predictable Most of our videos have 98% likes Or 99% likes You wanna know the one video that has slightly less Percentage of likes?
Starting point is 00:40:24 What? Two months ago, my boyfriend tries ASMR on me All the dudes in chat are like you have a boyfriend Unsubscribe oh my god, that is exactly what I expected from the internet. That's so funny that is Incredible yeah from the internet that's so funny that is that's incredible yeah the devil welcomes you to i can't believe that's an asmr i i might have to do a review of this it's a asmr devil welcomes you to hell incredible actually can i ever tell you that i want i think i might have mentioned this to you before what i always want to have an asmr channel where i just got people to do asmr for me
Starting point is 00:41:04 I always wanted to have an ASMR channel where I just got people to do ASMR for me. Oh, I think I remember you saying this years ago. Yeah, I always thought, like, you know, having a, like, Catwoman traps Batman ASMR, like that kind of thing would be amazing. I don't know how anyone hasn't done that shit. I bet they have. Who am I kidding? Oh, yeah, they probably have. I can't believe ASMR Medusa catches you.
Starting point is 00:41:24 That's so effing funny. Dude, I got to renew my ASMR channel. Revive it. Yeah. I've got YouTube.com slash Goodnight Crendor. All one word. And I've made the last five videos I made are ASMR food reviews. What are the views like on that? I get about
Starting point is 00:41:45 700 to 1,000 views a video. You tell me you like tuning in for your ASMR food reviews. I reviewed Wendy's Baconator Pringles, Rotisserie Chicken Pringles, Memphis Barbecue Pringles, Chocolate Pretzel Pop Tarts, and Nashville Hot
Starting point is 00:42:02 Chicken Potato Chips. Chocolate Pretzel Pop Tarts sounds like garbage. You Potato Chips. Chocolate Pretzel Pop-Tarts sounds like garbage. You know what? I think they might have been. I also reviewed Trolls World Tour Oreos. So, you know, I mean, there's not a high demand, but you never know. It might explode. Holy crap.
Starting point is 00:42:23 This is the problem, Crandor. This is why we're failing. Holy crap. This is the problem, Crandor. This is why we're failing. All right. So most ASMR, I imagine you have to be a beautiful person. But imagine you're just like a big dork burger. What the hell kind of ASMR are you going to do? I humbly submit what may be the best ASMR video I've ever seen in my life. This guy, the Tingle Tailor Episode 1 Made in France ASMR.
Starting point is 00:42:47 This guy wins. Holy crap. I've never seen. This is production quality. For a 42-minute video, this is like a movie. Wow. This looks like a movie. This is crazy.
Starting point is 00:42:59 This is the most well shot. This is, oh, I can't even compete. This is insane. Oh, my God. Look at this. This is, oh, I can't even compete. Oh, my God. Look at this. This guy wins. This guy's the winner. This guy's the winner. This is crazy.
Starting point is 00:43:13 He even has a no talking version. Oh, my God. Yeah. Why bother? This is crazy. Yeah. The comments are like, this guy is basically Netflix for ASMR. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:24 Everyone's like, you're telling me this isn't from a movie? Holy crap, what's the rest of his channel? This dude is incredible. The Tingle Doc, shut up! Oh my god, his work is incredible. I'm infinitely jealous of this guy. He's so talented. Whoa!
Starting point is 00:43:41 I'm infinitely jealous of this guy. He's so talented. Whoa! This is, uh, his top video is a mechanical keyboard, and it's literally just him typing on a mechanical keyboard, but, like, it's still filmed really well. That's, man, this dude, yeah, the color alone. Now, I will say, over on Goodnight Crandor,
Starting point is 00:44:03 I have a relaxing keyboard typing noise video from seven years ago with 111,000 views. All right. So I do know about my keyboard typing. Does it have 3.7 million views? Possibly one day. Do you have a video of you eating ASMR M&Ms with 574,000 views? I got an ASMR M&M jalapeno peanut to review for $3.3K. That's pretty good.
Starting point is 00:44:29 That's pretty good. I'm getting there. I stand corrected. I thought this guy was a goober, but he's actually one of those very attractive people that I'm now upset about. I guess I have to go become gorgeous in order to have an ASMR channel. That's fine. When I do, it's going to be that nasty ASMR. in order to have an ASMR channel.
Starting point is 00:44:41 That's fine. When I do, it's going to be that nasty ASMR. You know how every once in a while on YouTube, if I'm on this, like, your girlfriend eats a lollipop in your ear. All my videos are going to be that. But you'll do it in different locations. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:57 Your boyfriend's a horny pervert. ASMR. Hey, girl, let me whisper at you. Let me... That's the traffic. Hey, girl, let me whisper at you. That's the traffic. All right. What's going on, sports? Weather.
Starting point is 00:45:17 Oh, weather. Welcome to the weather desk. Today, we've got a weather request for Longview, Washington, which has a squirrel cult. They have a statue, dozens of squirrel bridges, and a yearly squirrel festival. So I had to do this one. I'm sorry, what does squirrel cult mean? They love squirrels. I have to look up
Starting point is 00:45:38 Longview Squirrel Cult. Of course, there is a squirrel dressed up like an old barbershop singer. Barbershot? Barbershop singer. Oh, yeah. You need one of those.
Starting point is 00:45:51 Yep. And in fact, there are many barbershop singers and one squirrel. Yeah. Squirrel fest. Amazing. Dude, I would go to squirrel fest. I would, too. It's great.
Starting point is 00:46:04 Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa the mascot for squirrel fest is named sandy b mcnutt is that true hold on sandy b mcnutt you know the sandy sandy sandy b mcn. That's the thing. Yeah, Sandy B. McNutt. Well, in Longview, Washington. No, no, no. Crandor, Crandor, Crandor. Crandor.
Starting point is 00:46:36 Go to 153. Yeah, that's what I was saying. She's like a rocky and bowlwinkle imagine yes i don't know how to explain to people this imagine rocky and bullwinkle where a lady is dressed up as rocky but instead of having squirrel teeth in her mouth the squirrel teeth are on her chin it looks very weird it's terrifying it is genuinely terrifying it's it's pretty scary honestly yeah bad choices were made oh no i don't like that at all okay well if you want to go find that it's called it's on youtube it's called the city of nuts longview squirrel fest enjoy that video. Have a blast. Longview, Washington, 42 degrees.
Starting point is 00:47:29 It's cloudy, 15% chance of rain through 8 p.m. It's going to be tomorrow, 38. No, wait. Today, 55% chance of rain. It's going to be 47, 47 degrees with a 25 chance of rain you got highs of whatever you got humidity at 91 you got your pressure 30.05 you got your visibility at nine miles you got your wind at six miles per hour going northwest and you got dew points at 39 and a uv index of zero moon phase waning crescent you got a waning crescent 10 day forecast
Starting point is 00:48:06 47 degrees 48 with rain 48 with rain 49 with rain 47 rain 52 49 with rain 47 rain 45 rain 46 rain 47 rain and so on that sucks man you know what actually sometimes i wish i lived in washington where just rain for days and days so i could like I could just stay indoors and kind of stay in bed and be like, Oh, it's raining. I don't want to get out of bed today. I love rain. Yeah, I miss it. The one time we have it a year here is a little weird, but I miss it.
Starting point is 00:48:39 It was super rain in the last couple days, and I love it. Here's the thing. I mentioned it before, but I get motivated by rain. Like, I get a, you know, you sleep in a bit, i wake up and i'm like yeah let's go and i'm ready to like you know do the day yeah do the day i'm ready to do the day i'm ready to do the day and uh that's the weather all right let's go sports. Sports, sports, sports, da-da-da, da-da-da. Welcome to the Sports Desk. We've had some big news in sports. Major sports news.
Starting point is 00:49:11 Major sports. Basketball preseason has started up. And then over in the football, actual football, we've got, well, I mean, I guess actual American football. The Rams beat the patriots on thursday night the titans beat the jaguars but minshu came back first appearance since week seven minshu is back folks uh so hopefully he'll get the start next week uh the buccaneers beat the vikings the cardinals beat the giants the cowboys beat the bangles the broncos beat the Giants. The Cowboys beat the Bengals. The Broncos beat the Panthers. The Chiefs beat the Dolphins.
Starting point is 00:49:48 The Bears beat the Texans. The Jets got blown out by the Seahawks. The Packers beat the Lions. The Chargers beat the Falcons. The Colts beat the Raiders. The football team beat the 49ers. They also beat the Steelers. They did, and they've taken over first place in the NFC East. I'm all aboard the football team. Heartbroken.
Starting point is 00:50:09 That would be very funny if the champions were the football team. What a great year that would be. 2020 ends with the football team as champions. And the Eagles upset the Saints, which means the Packers move in to
Starting point is 00:50:23 first place in the NFC. And hopefully that continues. All they got to do is win the rest of their games, get the bye week. And the Bills are currently beating the Steelers 23-7. I don't know what happened. We had it. This is the most Steelers season yet. Of course, it's ours to lose, so we will lose it.
Starting point is 00:50:41 That's of course. Yep. Now it's Buffalo's time to shine. F Buffalo. As a to shine. F Buffalo. As a former resident, F Buffalo. That's sports. Okay. What's our big news story of the day?
Starting point is 00:50:55 That rhymed. Thanks. I tried. Also, there's a lot of people sending us their McCocks and Crendors. Thank you. Keep it up. Yep. Keep it up. Keep it up. Oh, that's right. Also, there's a lot of people sending us their McCocks and Crendors. Thank you. Keep it up. Yep. Keep it up.
Starting point is 00:51:06 Keep it up. Oh, that's right. We had the follow-up to the treasure story. Oh, that's right. I didn't read that one yet. Yeah. So, the man, the finder of the treasure chest hidden in the Rocky Mountains reveals his identity. Yeah, we heard about this.
Starting point is 00:51:24 The crazy guy who hid his treasure. Yep. Someone found it, and people died looking for this treasure. Yes. We did this story like seven years ago, and then we covered it again like last year. And then we did it recently.
Starting point is 00:51:35 Yeah. Yeah, now here's the... The crazy thing is, the crazy thing is, is the guy is, I expected like some young treasure hunter. Not at all who it is. Oh, yeah. The man who found buried chests thing is is the guy isn't i expected like some young treasure hunter not at all who it is oh yeah
Starting point is 00:51:45 um the man who found buried chests that had enraptured scores of treasure hunters for a decade has revealed his identity jack stewiff stewiff stewiff and in june he found the treasure famously buried by author and retired art dealer forest fens somewhere in the rocky mountains with a poem from fens memoir the thrill the Chase, offering clues to its location. Fenn announced in June that the treasure had been found, but he wouldn't say where exactly it was found or who found it. And in July, to provide some closure to who had searched in other states, Fenn revealed that the chest had been hidden in Wyoming.
Starting point is 00:52:19 Over the course of the hunt, at least four people died searching through the Rockies for the trove, which Fenn said contained $2 million worth of gold and gems. Stuiff, in a post on Medium, said he had asked for his identity to be kept secret so he wouldn't invite the same fate that Fenn and his family had dealt with amid fervent treasure hunters. For the past six months, I've remained anonymous, not because I have anything to hide, but because Forrest and his family endured stalkers, death threats, home invasions, frivolous lawsuits, and potential kidnapping, all at the hands of people with delusions related to his treasure i don't want those things to happen to me and my family makes sense uh fen died in september at age 90 his family confirmed on monday that it was stewart who found fenn's treasure treasure
Starting point is 00:53:03 some treasure seekers had believed the finding was a hoax. We congratulate Jack on finding and retrieving the treasure, and we hope that this confirmation will help to dispel the conjecture, conspirational nonsense, and refusals to accept the truth. Stuiff, who Outside Magazine reports, is a 32-year-old medical student from Michigan, says a lawsuit forced him to give up his anonymity. A Chicago attorney named Barbara Anderson filed a lawsuit against Fenn and then unnamed find her in the U.S. District Court in Santa Fe, New Mexico,
Starting point is 00:53:32 in June after the treasure was reported found. She argues that after she had spent several years painstakingly deciphering Mr. Fenn's poem and scouting the general location of the treasure, someone hacked her cell phone and stole proprietary information that led them to the trove stewart said the case is meritless u.s district the u.s district court for new mexico has ruled the forest estate must provide some of my personal info to a woman i do not know with whom i have never communicated who has brought a meritless lawsuit against me this would make my name a matter of public record, so I chose to come forward today. While Stoof's identity is now known, a few other mysteries remain.
Starting point is 00:54:11 Where in Wyoming the chest was found and how exactly he solved the riddle. He says he poured over not only Fenn's poem, but also interviews with him, teasing out clues from his words to understand what kind of person he was and where he might be inclined to hide his riches. And the secret hiding spot? Stuif says he wants that to remain secret, lest it become a site of pilgrimage and become overrun, perhaps by people looking to see if it may be an emerald that was dropped along the way.
Starting point is 00:54:36 Oh, I guess that makes sense, kinda? I don't know. I guess, but... If I were to reveal where the treasure was, the natural wonder of that place, the forest held so dear dear will be destroyed by people seeking treasure they hope I drop. Getting to the wilderness location where the chest was is not dangerous in the conventional sense of the word, but it very quickly can be when people do not take basic precautions and go in the wrong directions or in the wrong conditions.
Starting point is 00:55:01 It is not an appropriate place to become a tourist attraction. The treasure is now in a secure location in New Mexico, but he plans to sell it. He says he has medical loans to pay off. I mean, okay. That's the wrap-up of the trilogy. It's finally done. It's a weird ending, but we're there.
Starting point is 00:55:18 We did it. We did it. We did it. I don't think I'd ever want to be a treasure hunter. No, that sounds like a giant pain in the ass. It doesn't sound anything like you imagine. Like, Indiana Jones, I don't think at the end he was like, well, I got to deal with this bullshit.
Starting point is 00:55:33 Yeah, or Nick Cage. Right? Yeah. Apparently, it's a thing. Who knew? Yeah. Damn. All right.
Starting point is 00:55:41 Well, we have our ending, and this is the ending of this podcast. Look at that. Perfect. Alright, well, that's it for this week. Crendor, hit up the socials. We've got this podcast up on YouTube.com slash Cox and Crendor podcast. Cut off the podcast part and you'll find the animations. Also, check us out on
Starting point is 00:56:00 SoundCloud, iTunes, Spotify. We're all over. Check out our main stuff. YouTube.com slash Jesse Cox. YouTube.com slash Crandor. Twitter.com slash blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Twitch.tv slash Jesse Cox. Twitch.tv slash Crandor. Facebook.com slash Jesse Cox. Facebook.com slash
Starting point is 00:56:15 Crandor. Instagram.com slash Notorious Cox. Instagram.com slash Crandor was taken. Listen to my ASMR. YouTube.com slash Goodnight Crandor. Fall asleep, please. And that's all I got. Okay. Well, that's it. Thanks so much for listening and watching or however you're enjoying this.
Starting point is 00:56:32 Let's get out of here. Crendor. And as always, to be continued..

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