Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 293 - The Gaming Commissioner
Episode Date: June 14, 2021It's time for an all new episode and boys return with exciting stories of the past week - is what we would say if we had any. How did we get so boring?! Meanwhile Crendor has had it with every game ge...tting remastered and Jesse just wants to know what's going down with vortexes in Arizona! All this and more on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://meundies.com/CRENDOR to get 15% off your first order and free shipping!
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Today's episode is brought to you by MeUndies.
MeUndies are the undies I have on me.
And also, swim trunks?
We'll talk about that and other things later.
Now let's jump into this podcast.
Hello everybody, it's time for Cogs and Trendog.
This is Trendog in the morning.
In the morning.
Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live.
In 4-hour recording studio.
Recording.
Wake your ass up.
It's the Crendog in the morning.
Crendog in the morning.
Hello, everybody.
Welcome to the Crendog in the morning.
How are you doing, Mario? Is everything okay? Hello everybody, welcome to the exciting episode of Gax and Creddor in the morning! Woo-wee-uh.
How are you doing, Mario? Is everything okay?
You find the princess yet?
Okay, that's nice.
No, I don't find the princess.
I was just watching some E3 stuff.
And, uh, you know. Games. I mean games I mean games yeah that's true I uh I was watching
E3 stuff too and I realized music makes 90% of games like selling it to me when you watch a
trailer and there's no music in it and you're like what the hell is this yeah it says a lot
about the importance of music in your things you're creating, I guess.
Yeah.
No, music makes a lot of stuff.
That's why you replace music in scenes and it changes the entire mood of the scene or the game or whatever you're watching, the movie.
It's like that time where they had the trailer for the Mummy movie but without music and it was just like, ah, ah, whoa! It was like, oh no, this is not good.
Honestly, I'm just waiting for the Nintendo E3.
I want some Animal Crossing news
and I want more Nintendo stuff.
New Mario Golf?
Oh my God, I'm so pumped.
The things that have really impressed me were the,
man, what was that, Replaced, I think was the name of the game.
It was like a cool little pixely looking game.
That was neat.
And then I know I'm probably going to get roasted for saying this, but New Battlefield looks like super cool.
It actually does.
It looks really cool.
Everybody's been saying that.
Everyone's like, dude, New Battlefield looks pretty great.
And I agree.
Yeah, so those are the two that I've been really impressed with so far.
There were some other games where I was like, oh, all right right when that comes out in 2023 or whenever that'll be fun but right now you know not a lot is on my radar because most of the
things that are coming out don't come out for ever that's why nintendo too i'm hoping breath
of the wild too i'd love that love me some breath of the wild and then they uh then they all talk
about the mobile games there's like and here's mobile games and i'm like i just remember that one e3 we're at where we saw pele when we were like
sitting in the crowd and then they're like and now minions mobile and like nobody clapped except
like five executives that were like yes all right time minions yes is this what's going to make me
money i think it is Alright good
Yeah
It was
That was an experience
When Pele walked out
I've never been so shocked
In my life
I was like
They dragged this man
Out of retirement
We got to see him
We got him up on stage
And he was like
Video games
And you're like
No Pele
No
But we got to see him in person it was amazing that was
wild that was wild yeah uh that's when i realized like how formulaic a lot of the thing it's like
ted talks it's like they they go up there like hello and welcome to my ted talk e3 today you're
in for a treat first up we've got something that you will not want to miss out on.
I hate that you do it so accurately.
I hate that you do it so accurately.
This isn't for us.
It's for you, the gamer, sitting at home, gaming.
We love gaming, but we love your money even more.
Todd Howard, is that you?
Like I said, how robotic it is.
Like they don't just come up and be like, you know, gaming is just really a part of us.
And, you know, we're speaking here from like experience.
Like we play games.
They're just like, one thing that we believe in is story.
And story is a part of all our lives.
Because our lives are stories.
It's like, all right all right neat where's the game
it's such a dead-on impersonation and that is it literally could be a video called every e3 ever
and that's just it that's it yeah oh my god it's uh actually what it's kind of like ted talks
in a way i guess ted talks aren't as bad as that but they're like you know they're kind of up there
like what i found in five minutes was that by researching about the independent life of
prebiotic life forms that i could extend the human life by a vast majority of 55 years.
Now this is my TED talk.
And it's like, this shit's going on.
One of the craziest things I noticed is that in order to make it more, I don't know, I
don't want to say dress down, but I also want to say more relatable because I don't think
that's what it is either.
But everyone, for example, the Xbox conference, one of the ladies came out and her pants were held together by string,
like a piece of string.
And I was like, you're all millionaires.
Everyone on the stage is a millionaire.
Why are you dressed like this?
They got to relate.
They got to relate to the gamer.
Gamers don't want business suits.
They want casual.
I guarantee you that happened in like a business room.
Like, we need to dress like the gamer. Dress
down. That's the whole point is they
don't understand.
They're just like, this is the gamer
attire, right? Yes.
Gamer attire.
It's just, you know.
I don't know. You know? I don't
know. My $500 white
t-shirt, I feel like is very relatable,
right? Everyone has a white t-shirt. feel like is very relatable right everyone has a white t-shirt
yeah yeah yeah yeah sure like you gotta come out sporting your like shitty t-shirt that hasn't
been washed in like two weeks and it's got like pizza stains and like chocolate and just sweat
if someone did that and the first thing they said was like we've been hard at work on our game i'd be like i believe this guy i think he really has
i haven't slept in three days
wow i can smell him from here i've been trying to get this done for you guys for weeks
that'd be amazing yeah that's not healthy i feel bad for him but like also that'd be amazing
Not healthy I'd feel bad for him but also that'd be amazing
That's why you're making
Games now right
Yeah I'm never gonna do that
I'm never gonna be like
The guy who's like hey welcome to
My games conference
I made a
I made a game this year
It was pretty good I guess
I haven't really seen the outside world
In three months so I hope y'all
are still doing alright
anyway here's the trailer
it's pretty okay and if you need me
I'll be eating a hoagie
I like this guy
you seem so relatable this guy
that's right I totally am
very relatable
that's what I've been doing, just watching some E3 today
What have you been doing this week?
Oh my god, me?
I have been doing a lot of
Like, in office
Goodness, working around
Trying to get stuff fixed up here
You know, just taking care of business
Trying to make things happen
Unfortunately, if you're asking
If I did anything cool
or exciting this week, no.
I did nothing. Nothing cool or exciting
happened this week. I saw nothing cool.
Nothing fun happened.
I just worked.
And then, yeah,
at night, I went home and watched
Sweet Tooth, which is
a show that's on Netflix that I guess
is a comic that is, you know, one of those comics that's made into a TV show.
And it was pretty good.
And then, yeah, I mean, that was my week.
I did nothing.
I spent a week on planet Earth and nothing really important took place for me.
So, you know what?
Sometimes I'm doing pretty good.
Sometimes I'm doing pretty good Sometimes I'm doing pretty good
The important question here
Did you work out?
Yeah, of course
That's what I was doing while watching Sweet Tooth
Alright, look at that
See?
I have to find something to keep me interested
Now I need to find a new show
Thankfully, Lupin Season 2
came out on Netflix, so now I have something else to watch.
What's that?
Um, it's about
a French, it's a French show
that is either, depending on how you want to watch it,
dubbed or subbed.
And it is about a criminal
mastermind who
is really impressed with
Lupin, the gentleman criminal and um
he uses his like you know books as inspiration to commit his crimes and of course all the cops
are stumped except for one cop who's like this is lupin and he's like no that's not true there's
no way that guy that's what a dumb idea that would be which admittedly very dumb but there's
like a cat and mouse thing going on and the guy at the same time has his kid he's trying to like
look after and his wife is trying to move on with her life because she's like you weren't a good
father and he's like trying to be a good dad but at the same time he's like trying to commit master
criminal crimes it's pretty good it's just uh it's like some some Sherlock Moriarty thing Um
Except the main character
Is the criminal the gentleman criminal
Oh I see
So it's kind of like you're cheering for him a bit
Like you're cheering for the criminal
Yeah like so the setup is that
Years ago
His dad worked for a very wealthy family
And they had like some
Magnificent jewel And um The His dad worked for a very wealthy family and they had like some magnificent jewel.
And the wealthy family lost the jewel, blamed its theft on his father.
And then his father was sent away to prison where he died in prison.
And I think it's that he killed himself, but maybe he didn't.
Who knows? that he killed himself, but maybe he didn't, who knows. And so this boy basically raised himself,
and he used the book, the Lupin books,
to get himself through life and become a gentleman,
a gentleman thief, if you will.
And now he's seeking revenge on the family,
because it turns out that family, spoilers,
didn't
you know lose or have the the diamonds and jewels stolen but they it was like an insurance scam and uh so basically his dad was like died in prison for no reason so now he's like out for
revenge and so he's trying to steal from specifically that family but he like also
steals from other people because he's just, like, a thief, right?
So it's that kind of show.
It's super fun.
I like the first season.
It was a little, you know, meandering at some times.
But I'm always down for a good heist.
And the very first episode is super clever in how they do the heist and, like, how, you know.
It's one of those things where, like, a dude is, like, so damn cool.
They're like, all right, I got to see what this cool guy is gonna get up to some more you know what i
mean or it's like he's so stylish and so cool you're just like damn that guy i looked easy
how he ripped those people off man i want to be like that yeah that's pretty cool i like that's
uh it's like a different premise i like when when people do it, like try a little mix up, you know?
Mix up?
A little mix up?
A little mix up.
Yeah, I haven't gone through Netflix shows while working out, so I like plowed through
all of the new season of Castlevania and did, you know, Sweet Tooth and now I'll do Lupin
and then who knows what else. I'll, you know, Sweet Tooth, and now I'll do Lupin, and then who knows what else.
I'll, you know, see what else there is.
I do it with things like Loki and things that are on Disney, but Disney sucks because they're
like once a week a new episode, which is like garbage town.
I hate that.
I hate it.
Once a week.
Where's my dopamine?
I can power watch.
I need answers immediately. If you leave me with a cliff power watch. I need answers.
I mean, if you leave me with a cliffhanger, I want answers immediately.
I don't want none of that.
Like, see you in a week, you big idiots.
I hate it.
It's see, I watch when I watch my show.
It's usually while I'm Warhammer painting.
Ah, so you're like half paying attention.
Really?
Yes.
It's, you know, it's kind of like background, but I'm kind of paying attention.
If it's something I really want to watch, then I'll sit down and watch it.
But otherwise, I just kind of paint to stuff.
A lot of times, I also just paint to streams.
I put on Bob Ross streams.
It's kind of like painting with him.
I love a good Bob ross stream they're so
good because he was like he actually gave me a little idea because i'm painting my my little
miniature guys right and he was like now this painting i like to think that the painting's
alive and i'm talking to the painting and i'm like this is a house where this guy lives and
he's like you give your paintings little stories and i was like dude you can give your like little
miniature guys stories like this is you know radus, and he fought in the Great War,
but then he got his arm cut off.
Is this Radimus?
He snipped his arm off.
Radimus?
Radimus.
Oh, Crandor.
Is he at least a rat?
Is he at least a rat?
Yes.
Although it would be funnier if he wasn't.
Right.
He just looked kind of like a rat. But he wasn't a rat.
He was just a kakai.
They called him Radimus.
Because he had, like, a little, like, you know, he had a little rat in him.
He was a little ratty.
Radimus Maximus IV.
So he's also an ancient Roman emperor.
Yeah.
Understood.
I don't know if they had Rome and Warhammer, but maybe they did.
Yeah.
I'm sure the empire, you can, like, you can get a little Romey in there.
Yeah.
Main point being, if you can add a little character to your things you're painting,
it kind of brings them to life a little bit.
I find that very funny that you have Bob Ross on while you paint.
Bob Ross is immediate sleep time for Jesse.
If we were together and you were like, let's watch Bob Ross, I would be passed out in the next two seconds.
Not because Bob Ross is boring.
Because when I was younger, I would listen to Bob Ross while he was on TV.
And I would take a nap in the afternoon.
And he would knock me out every afternoon.
I would come home, eat a bowl of cereal, lay on the couch, and watch Bob Ross.
And Bob Ross would be like, happy little trees, happy little clouds.
And I wake up a few hours later, my parents would be home, like, what have you been doing all afternoon?
I'd be like, studying.
Yeah, I mean, well, it's just good for, you know, you can fall asleep, but it's good to just chill out.
You don't got to pay attention.
It's just like you're painting with somebody.
You're painting with Bob.
Yeah, painting with Bob.
Painting with Bob.
Yeah, you know, it's a little Warhammer paint.
And then, I don't even get here.
I don't even know what I was talking about.
You asked me what I was doing this week, and you ended up talking about painting with Bob Ross.
You rat.
Yeah, that's a good point.
I don't even.
What did you.
All right, let me salvage this.
What did you do this week?
Here's the thing.
I didn't really do anything either.
Oh, my God.
We have.
You're telling me we both
somehow led two very boring weeks?
Um, let's see.
I went to the store, bought some new shorts.
Boring.
Under armor.
Boring. Under armor shorts?
Boring. Yeah, but they're pretty neat
though. Yeah, it's boring.
Um,
let's see. I out boring i ate food i ate the
i ate some food um grocery store boring um god i'm running out of things so far pretty boring oh man normie living your dumb normal life doing nothing although when i was buying my
under armor shorts there are these two people behind me talking and the one guy was like dude
you look like shrek to the guy next to him which i found funny because we literally just talked
about shrek and i want shrek. And then the guy was like,
who the hell's Shrek?
And he's like, you know, the big green ogre
guy. And he's like, oh, Shrek.
Yeah, I kind of do look like him.
I mean, it's nice to know
who you are.
Yeah, I do look like Shrek.
You turn around, he's just a giant green guy.
Yeah, he's just like a big green man.
Yeah, you're right, I kind of do.
I think it's funny how his friend literally is like,
hey, you look like this big green ogre from the movie.
And he's like, yeah, I guess so.
Maybe that's why they're friends.
Yeah.
Maybe they're not even friends.
Maybe he just randomly went up to him and told him that.
Sir, you look like Shredder.
Why, thank you, stranger.
sir you look like shred why thank you stranger uh let's see i played i played wow you did play well classic yeah that doesn't count as doing something though that doesn't
let me tell you what i was doing and wow all right so i have my one druid i port to moonglade with
buy the pattern for ruined ar, the Arcanite Rod,
because everyone's got to make it for enchanting
to get Burning Crusade enchanting.
Hearth back, sell it on the auction house,
make like 15, 20 gold.
I've made like 200 gold by doing that.
It's a grade A, grade A, full foolproof playing.
And I made 200 gold.
So you're doing great.
In the fictional economy of a game that came out 15 years ago, you're doing so good.
I'm doing fantastic.
Yeah.
To be fair, I'm doing better than I did back then.
Well, now you know.
Now I know.
Oh, by the way, they were like, did you see that E3?
They were like, we're remastering Life is Strange.
I'm like, that game came out like four years ago.
He's going to start remastering everything?
Sometimes you just got to remaster.
That's like if they remastered Overwatch.
I mean, that's what Overwatch 2 is, basically.
Yeah, but they're not saying it.
That's like, okay, 2015 games.
Let's see.
What if you remastered Super Mario Maker?
Call of Duty Black Ops 3?
Remastered.
Dying Light? Remastered.
Fallout 4? Remastered.
I believe most of these could be
remastered. But it's like, just
remaster older games.
Like, alright. What if you go back
to 2010 games?
Let's go back a little further.
2010 games have been remastered, though.
I feel like there's got to be a point in which there's a cutoff for remastering.
Skyrim would just be re-releasing and remaking all the time.
There's no cutoff point.
There's no cutoff point. You can do whatever you want.
That's the problem. There needs to be like a commissioner.
There needs to be a commissioner of video games.
He's like, alright,
let me make my ruling on this.
No, you cannot remaster for
another six years at least.
Create something new.
Exactly. There's got to be one of those.
Yeah. Video game commissioner. I will be one of those. Yeah. Video game commissioner.
I will be the first video game commissioner.
Oh, my God.
Going back and looking at some of these old games, I'm like, wait a second.
That came out in 2012?
Like, Diablo 3 and Guild Wars 2 came out in 2012?
Yeah, dude.
What about 2013?
Grand Theft Auto 5?
Battlefield 4?
I thought that was like 5 years ago
Well
Anything else at all happen in your life
Before we move on
Man
We really got nothing this week
We got nothing this week
This is the nothing
Hold on
Let me look up something
Maybe something happened to someone else.
Okay.
Craziest thing that happened this week.
All right.
Craziest thing that happened this week.
The craziest thing, seven weird things that happened this week.
All right, okay, okay.
This is 2013.
This is 2013.
I bet it's spinning. All right, all right This is 2013. This is 2013.
I bet it's fitting.
All right.
All right.
Here we go.
A stray dog taken in by a couple has shown a desire to wear women's underwear.
That's a very strange thing.
All right.
Good.
Good.
Yep.
Another strange thing that happened.
A job applicant to an American fast food chain stole
from the tip jar. That's pretty wild.
Pretty wild. Oh my god.
2013 was a different time, I guess.
Scientists in China discovered remains
that prove cats have been living off humans
for thousands of years.
We know that. That checks out.
Yep.
A Picasso worth millions, recently sold for 100 euros.
I guess there was a charity offer, and I guess someone screwed up,
and it was a raffle or something, and someone won for 100 euros.
Huh.
A man in Florida
Walked into a convenience store
And tried to trade a live alligator
For a 12 pack of beer
That happened
Alright that's newsworthy right there
A house
Had cake stolen out of it
Someone made a cake and left it in the kitchen
A guy broke in
Stole the cake
Shit dude
An Oklahoma man Proposed to his girlfriend while getting arrested Someone made a cake and left it in the kitchen. A guy broke in, stole the cake. Shit, dude.
An Oklahoma man proposed to his girlfriend while getting arrested. That was apparently very important.
Do you think they're still together?
Damn it.
I've got to look this up.
All right, who is the person?
Oklahoma man, Justin Harrell of Elk City.
Elk City, dude. Justin Harrell of Elk City. Elk City, dude.
Justin Harrell, Elk City, married.
Justin Harrell, Elk City, married?
Question mark?
There is absolutely nothing.
This man, they locked him away, and that was it.
That was the end.
Man, you know, I like to think he's still happily married and having a good life.
Still in jail.
Still in jail, still happily married.
He's got some elks.
He's got...
They put him in a cell with elks and everything's fine.
The end.
Well, speaking of fine and your end, get it?
Because it's your butt.
Anyway, your rear end.
This show is going nowhere.
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Let's go.
Oh, boy. MeUndies.com slash Crandor. That's me. All right, let's go chapter seven.
Guys, Crandor has a traffic out there.
Oh, boy.
Traffic is crazy.
It is.
You know what?
We keep looking at the same traffic.
Let's go fly over the ocean real quick here.
All right, take a look over at the ocean.
And here we go.
All right, we got a backup of dolphins.
Dolphins are backed up trying to get to the dolphin store to buy dolphin the dolphin store yeah that's a store run by a dolphin
he sells what do they sell what do they what do they what do you consider dolphin things
uh i don't know i haven't actually gone into the dolphin store ah all right well yeah i mean that
makes sense yeah there's no reason to but the dolphins seem to really want to go in there and the
Who knows what they're buying?
Then over here. It looks like there's a bunch of boats backed up. They're trying to get to the boat store
I don't know why they want to go to the boat store buy more boats. I guess does it work there?
I do believe a boat works there. It's a Bodie
Bodie Bodie McVie Bodie McBoatface. No, it's just Bodie Bodie I do believe a boat works there. It's a boaty. Boaty.
The Boaty McBoatface?
No, it's just Boaty Boaty.
Boaty Boaty?
I think he's a distant relative.
Right.
And he's selling boats to the boats, so, you know.
That's weird.
That seems wrong.
That seems wrong on a lot of levels.
Listen, I don't question it.
I just report the traffic.
Back to you.
All right. Now let's go over to weather weather time let's see we've got uh people ranking shrek movies
actually what do they got this person says shrek 2 over shrek 4 over shrek over puss in boots over
shrek 4d over shrek the christmas special over shrek is in love shrek is life over shrek, over Puss in Boots, over Shrek 4D, over Shrek the Christmas Special,
over Shrek is in love, Shrek is life,
over Shrek, those official Shrek Fortnite dancing videos of DreamWorks YouTube, continued.
And they're all better than Shrek 3.
Okay.
I mean, everything's better than Shrek 3.
What the hell did I just say?
Everything's better than Shrek 3.
I can't even say Shrek 3.
I can't even say better than Shrek 3. I can't even say Shrek 3.
I can't even say it.
Shrek 3.
I can't say it.
Someone wants a weather request for Sedona, Arizona.
Great.
Sedona, it's a place all right.
Sedona.
Sedona, Arizona. Sedona is a place, all right. Sedona. Sedona, Arizona.
Sedona, Arizona.
I'll kick out Woppy for this one.
Woppy activated.
Sedona, Arizona. Weather as of 311 p.m.
Mountain Standard Time. 103 degrees.
Fair.
Excessive heat warning.
Action recommended.
Execute a pre-planned activity identified in the instructions issued by Flagstaff Arizona National Weather Service.
The lower elevations of Yavapai County.
What is happening?
Description.
Excessive heat warning remains in effect till 6 p.m.
Mountain Standard Time Friday below 5,000 feet.
What?
Dangerously hot conditions.
Daytime temperatures ranging from 98 to 108 degrees then rising.
This thing is broken.
This thing is broken.
This thing.
What the hell?
102 degrees.
114 degrees from Monday.
Who wants to go there?
That place sucks.
This guy's rusty.
All right, I'm going to take over now.
There's some heat warnings there.
Drink plenty of fluids.
Stay in the air-conditioned room if you got it.
Stay out of the sun.
Check up on everybody.
That's pretty much the warning. Now we'll take a look at the air-conditioned room if you got it. Stay out of the sun. Check up on everybody, you know.
That's pretty much the warning.
Now, we'll take a look at the 10-day.
All right.
Wait, we got the rest of this day.
I didn't even see that.
We got a high of 103.
You got a low of 71.
You got some 11-mile-an-hour winds, 14 on the dew point, 30.09 inches of pressure, 10-mile visibility you got the uv index at a 6 out of 10
and a waxing crescent moon now this is kind of crazy look at this monday 104 tuesday 107
wednesday 105 thursday 105 friday 103 saturday 102 sunday 101 and then finally it cools down
on monday to 97 so i went to this website uh and i looked up
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town and learn about their history, all with the help of an informative guide. Whether you feel
the energy on your skin or experience a feeling of enlightenment find out for yourself the powers
of a vortex keep things simple with a small group tour limited to 15 people for a more intimate
experience what do they mean by vortex vortex vortex i don't know i'll see the all right let's
check let's check the definition of vortex just to clarify.
A mass of whirling fluid or air, especially a whirlpool or whirlwind.
Right, but that's not what they're showing here, people standing around rocks.
All right.
We've got a region within a body of fluid in which the fluid elements have an angular velocity.
Nope.
That is an actual vortex.
It's like when you stir your
coffee, your creamer
into your coffee or whatever.
Wait, hold on.
By jeep, head
into the cave.
The cave?
What is happening right now?
By jeep,
visit
the first vortex where you'll learn how in 1981, What is happening right now? But cheap. All right.
Visit the first vortex where you'll learn how in 1981,
medium Paige Bryant identified these powerful grid sites,
which have defied explanation for years.
As you visit multiple vortices,
you may start to understand why people from all walks of life have traveled
here for enlightening experiences.
Feel the power of each site as you hear about its history.
Learn about the cultural beliefs that surround it and think about its spiritual possibilities.
Discover how vortices connect Chinese medicine, American Indian lore, and New Age mysticism
and hear theories about how vortices affect Earth.
Keep an open mind and let loose your skeptical, academic, and adventurous
sides in order to make the most
of your experience and find out if
the Vortices hold something special for
you. Perhaps you'll end your tour
back in Sedona feeling either enlightened
or just happy to have gained a new
perspective on the planet.
This is like when people walk on the
coals or some shit.
It's like one of those spiritual things.
You know what I mean?
I mean, I know.
Spiritual retreats.
I know what you mean, but it's like, so you drive into the desert and stand around rocks,
and you're like, do you feel the healing energy?
It does sound like what it sounds like.
Listen, there's got to be some people that are signing up for this, right?
Otherwise, they wouldn't do it.
This, this, this.
The reviews are great.
Five stars from Alina D.
May 2021.
This just happened.
The missed memorable part of the experience was, capital W, the medicine circle with Buddha statues.
was, capital W,
the medicine circle with Buddha statues. Alongside
the prayer flags,
ABD, the healing
walk in the vortex.
Moose was the highlight of the tour.
He has great
knowledge and communicates wonderfully.
Five stars.
There's like some Google
reviews for it too
my guide crystal was a knowledgeable was knowledgeable in the unique qualities of
the region geological american indian history shamanism american oh wait that's the thing
my husband and i did a private tour with linda how many people are working here? A lot, apparently. Wait, what?
Crystal Starweaver, far beyond surpassed all expectations of our Sedona Tours sunset.
I love that.
Crystal Starweaver is someone's name?
Crystal Starweaver.
That is a Star Wars character.
That person fought Luke Skywalker at some point.
Wonderful combination of historical facts,
geological information, and mystical enlightenment
accommodated our group of six,
was in tune to the group needs,
and covered a large amount of the area in four hours.
We felt she cared more about our experience than her watch.
Extra bonus, she provided blankets, jackets, snacks, and water.
Can't wait to come back.
This one says,
Richard, April 2021
Waste of time
This vortex tour was a waste of time and money
It is not a vortex tour
As represented
We could have found out the same information
On the internet
There are four major vortices in Sedona
We saw none of them
And Boynton Canyon
We pulled over on the side of the road
and were asked if we felt different because of the vortex in the area. The guide said they didn't
have a permit to go to any of the significant vortices, including Boynton Canyon. There was
another major vortex at the airport, but we were driven up to airport and back without stopping
or given any information about the vortex there. The only good things were the visit to airport and back without stopping or given any information about the
vortex there the only good things were the visit to minor to a minor vortex at rachel's knoll and
the emmy tabha stupa we wasted two and a half hours of our time over two hundred dollars
i don't know what anything i don't know what the hell was just said there.
Seemed angry, but I don't know what was said.
I'm just looking at the pictures.
Like, there's some nice scenery and stuff,
but then, like, mixed into it,
there's, like, summoning circles and shit.
That's what I'm saying.
It, like, looks beautiful, and then they're like,
and now we summon. You're like like what the hell is happening right now
I hope someone who's like
Into like
Spiritual medicine is like
Don't you like a vortice is a connection
To the astral plane
Where you can summon the power of
Healing
To unleash your
Shamanic energy
Into your body
Yeah I hope we get
There's some people feeling the energy
The photo you just sent me
Looks like
You know whatever you see in Star Trek
Like a Vulcan
And they're like
Vulcan mind power
It looks like a bunch of dudes standing around like
We are Vulcans doing something Vulcan-y.
Yeah.
They look like aliens.
These people look like they would go on this tour.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
No, for sure.
That guy.
All right.
So a couple of crime daughters sent me.
They're both wearing what I can only describe as kind of like hippie tops.
sent me they're both wearing uh what i can only describe as kind of like hippie tops and the guy definitely looks like he still is living he still follows fish around or whatever and the woman
looks like she just married him she's like well he treats my kids nice but then she adapted the
like teachings of the inner spiritual yeah well she was in then she's got like teachings of the inner spiritual circle she's wearing then she's got like
the super necklace and the like shirt and everything that's uh man this place is crazy
sedona is definitely a wild place yeah this is but the thing is right it does again look really cool
well the area is beautiful yeah The actual area is gorgeous
Yeah
That's why people go there for tours and stuff
And they go out to like experience
I mean most of the best things in Sedona
Are like hiking trails
Or various tours that you can go on
But uh
Yeah there's also because
It's the deep desert kind of vibe
There's also a lot of like,
if you come out into the,
into the woods,
you will unlock your,
your deep chakras.
You're like,
okay.
All right.
All right.
Yeah.
It's a,
you know,
it's if you like chakras and go for it.
Yeah.
Go for it.
That's the weather.
Go stay at a,
there's like a Sedona spa.
I'd go stay at a spa
that's my shock oh yeah that's definitely i want to unlock the spa chakra where i'm like
stick some crap in my face and let me sink in the mud oh yeah i see the spa look at that wow
yeah you just uh you sit there you look at the same scenery but you got like a glass of wine
or a drink and you just sound great to me that sounds fantastic that's my kind of spiritual journey yeah that's the there's something called the
enchantment resort and it's the number one hotel in sedona apparently and let me tell you view wise
it looks gorgeous now you hook me up with that i want want that. Oh, my God.
Yeah, and that's the weather.
All right.
Let's go, especially if it's like 115 degrees or whatever.
That's messed up.
Let's go to sports.
Sports.
We've got sports.
First up, we've got some hockey.
Islanders beating the Lightning 2-1, going up 1-0 in that series.
Golden Knights will be taking on the Canadians.
That happens tomorrow or today, depending on when you're watching this
or in the past.
In the NBA, the Bucks tie up the Nets 2-2 in that series.
The Jazz are up 2-1 on the Clippers.
Phoenix Suns, speaking of Arizona, are up 3-0 on the Denver Nuggets.
So it looks like the Phoenix Suns could be progressing to the Western Conference Finals over there.
And then the 76ers up 2-1 on the Hawks.
In baseball, we've got some standings here.
Baseball.
Baseball.
Tampa Bay Rays up top the AL East
White Sox
atop the Central, you got the Oakland A's
atop the West, you got the Mets
atop the East, you got the
Brewers atop the Central
with the Cubs half a game back
and you got the San Francisco Giants
atop the West with the Dodgers
one and a half back.
So, you know, 60-something games into the baseball season.
We still got about 100 games to go.
So we'll see where that goes in a few months.
In fact, let's check on the Olympics because that's like almost a month away now.
Looks like they're doing trials.
And nine Kentucky swimmers qualify for Olympic trials.
Oh, my God.
Swimmers just go to Kentucky?
Still looks like Olympics are happening.
Honestly, like I said before, I like having the Olympics on in the background.
The last time the Olympics were on, I was just watching curling
in the Winter Olympics stuff when I got my gallbladder out.
So I had nothing to do but sit there on the couch and be like,
yeah, Olympics, and then pass out, and then wake up and be like,
oh, more Olympics, and then pass out and wake up.
That is exactly how I feel when it comes to the Olympics.
But it's, I don't know, it's like too real.
It's like, yeah it's like yeah I
late at night I'll watch the late night Olympic like recap of what's going on and then I'll fall
asleep to that earlier today people you never heard of did a thing and this is the recap of
that thing they did and I'm like oh this is great yeah I'm down yeah it's it's like a once every couple year bob
ross special if you want to fall asleep just flip it on you're like oh yeah that's that's where it's
at and then you can say that you watch the olympics yeah exactly yeah i support team america and that's the sports
okay
what is our big
whatever thing that you've got for us today
you're looking for a big
whatever thing well let me tell you
we've got some big
whatever things around here
pineapple
works as a
natural meat tenderizer.
Somehow I did know that.
I've never done it, but I did know that.
I haven't done it either, but I feel like I want to experiment now
because I like pineapple.
Uh-huh.
And I like tender meat.
I like tender meat as well.
Yeah, it's crazy.
The fruit is packed with the enzyme bromelain,
which breaks down protein chains.
Bromelain.
Bromelain.
Bromelain, which breaks down protein chains,
making it an ideal marinade for meats when you don't have a lot of time.
But for the same reason, pineapple does not work for jams or jellies,
since the enzyme breaks down gelatin as well.
The bromelain is so strong that pineapple processors have to wear protective gloves
otherwise the enzymes eats away
at their skin on their face and hands
leaving dry skin and small
sores. Oh my god.
I guess, I mean, I guess we've
never, you know, I've worked with pineapple
before. I guess we've never done multiple
pineapples though. Yeah, well it's like when you
eat pineapple, it's like, it like shreds
your mouth. It's like Captain Crunch. What do it's like shreds your mouth. It's like Captain Crunch.
What do you mean it shreds your mouth? Are you crazy?
What pineapple are you eating?
Are you not cutting it?
Are you eating the outside?
No.
You're telling me that pineapple shreds
the inside of your mouth. Well, it's not like
shred shreds, but it's like
it makes it...
Oh no, it's hard to describe.
You're out of your mind. You're crazy.
I'm not out of my mind. People, you gotta comment.
Tell me I'm not out of my mind.
You're out of your... Pineapple shreds
your mouth?
Pineapple shred mouth.
I think you're wrong.
No, no, no. So, people
ask, why does pineapple make my mouth bleed?
Well, why does pineapple cut your mouth?
I don't know what that means.
Why does pineapple make your mouth bleed?
What is happening to everyone?
It's what makes your mouth tingle.
Like, what the hell is that?
Yeah, it says it's the bromelain is what makes your mouth tingle, burn, and maybe even bleed.
This is because bromelain is trying to break down the proteins in your mouth.
Uh-huh.
Maybe you are the weird one.
Maybe it's in the way of your mouth, and you don't eat the weird one.
If I can eat lots of pineapple, I'm fine with it.
We got to have like a poll Or something
Like does your mouth hurt when you eat pineapple
Like it doesn't
I don't bleed or something like that
But like it tingles and it's kind of like ah
You know
Like okay
We gotta just comment below
Comment
I don't believe this i still don't believe this
i'm gonna run i don't believe this i'm gonna do a the youtube like community poll and use the
use it for what it's meant for that's finding out pineapple facts and if it hurts people
um i don't believe this at all oh. Last week we talked about the pear cider.
I actually bought the Angry Orchard pack.
And the strawberry one was all right.
The peach mango one was all right, too.
The unfiltered one, though, that was the best one.
Because it's not as sweet.
It's a little more dry.
And it tastes like a better apple cider uh alcoholic
apple cider thing so definitely recommend the unfiltered angry orchard if you're gonna drink it
okay so that's my little little tip to you that's the fact of the day it's a terrible fact
that's a terrible all right what is our big terrible fact terrible fact what is our big news story of the day
um police mother tries karate son strips and dog steals cornbread at walmart
there's a lot there's a lot to this one there's a lot going on here there's a lot also
stories from 2019 but I don't care.
I need to know.
In a strange twist of events, a mother allegedly performed karate, a son stripped nude, and their dog stole cornbread this week at a Wisconsin Walmart.
Lots of questions.
Hoping for a lot of answers.
The incident happened Wednesday evening when Eau Claire,isconsin police respond to a theft call at the store the apartment said in a facebook post police found a woman identified as
lisa smith 46 chasing her dog beau in the entry when they arrived and learned that son benny van
what a name 25 was in the store as well.
The woman allegedly arrived at the store with the pet unleashed and had been pulling apart store displays and placing them in her cart.
Wait, what?
So she just showed up with her pet unleashed and then just starts pulling apart the store displays being like, want to buy this one i feel like that whole sentence is out of order a woman showing up and tearing apart sort of displays is much more important than an unleashed dog at least for this
story i feel like but okay i guess that's how the dog steals the cornbread he's not on a leash
she was asked to leave by staff and left the store to perform karate moves
in the parking lot as one does yes in the meantime bo got a box of jiffy cornbread muffin mix and
tried to leave the store well there you go you can't have a thief dog that's true um as the chaos
ensued police say van went to the back of the store where he removed all of his clothing, exposing himself to customers.
The man grabbed new clothes from the store and tried to run over an officer with a scooter before he was arrested.
Smith was also arrested but fought with the officers.
Both faced several charges related to the incident, including disorderly conduct.
Online records show they were jailed Friday morning and it was unclear if they had an attorney.
As for Dog Bo, they caught him and brought him
to the Humane Association.
The dog was not charged.
We issued him a warning for theft.
Ha ha ha.
Ah, these idiots.
I gotta look up what these people look like.
I...
Are we gonna find them? Wait! i feel like we've covered this story
before what do you mean i just saw the pictures of these people and i know for a fact we've covered
this story before what do you mean i'm gonna send me the photos send me the photos photos I don't here's the thing I I know I don't know this says about me but what
trash be all looking alike that sort of meth head look all looks the same also
I was like the witch in like Hansel and Gretel. And she just she just like
she's 47.
That's a rough
46.
48 now, but that's a rough 48, man.
That's, she's lived.
She's lived some life.
I'm like 95% sure we covered
this story already.
Probably in 2019.
I know I've seen that face. We covered this story already. Are you sure? Probably in 2019. I know I've seen that face.
We covered a story.
Listen, we've done almost 300 episodes of this.
Mother tries karate, sun strips, dog steals cornbread.
We covered this.
Out of all the stories, this is the one we've done before?
You act like out of all the stories, like we would miss we've done before? You act like out of all the stories, we would miss something like this.
This would not bypass us.
We would be looking and be like, oh my god.
In fact, I guarantee it's like one of the episode thumbnails on SoundCloud or something.
I don't believe it.
2019?
No, you're making me go to SoundCloud.
April 13th, 2019.
I'm going to go back to 2019.
SoundCloud. I'm going to go back to 2019. SoundCloud.
I'm going to go all the way back to 2019.
Got to go through all our episodes to find this information.
There it is.
April 14th, 2019.
Episode 192.
Karate Witch.
You even said she was a witch then?
We did cover it. Karate Witch. Karate Witch. this week was so boring even the news was old
Oh my god.
Well, we do have an update from January of that year, 2020.
Okay, and this is an update.
A mother and son arrested in a bizarre incident at the Eau Claire Walmart have been sentenced.
Police were called to the store when, you know, she was doing karate.
During that time, he stripped naked, blah, blah, blah.
As part of the plea deal,
Smith pleaded no contest to obstructing an officer and disorderly conduct.
Van pleaded no contest to obstruction
as well as kind of ludicrous behavior.
Smith was sentenced to one year of probation
while Van got two years probation.
Van is also not allowed to consume
any avocado pits.
There is no word on why
that stipulation
There is no word on why that stipulation
was added.
What the
What does that mean?
He's not allowed to consume
any avocado pits.
What happened?
I don't know.
Why?
Why can't you consume avocado pits?
What the shit?
What? what the shit what a lot of people are saying it's the next super seed
but that doesn't seem wise
that doesn't seem wise
yeah but why is he banned from eating them now
why can't he eat any
did maybe he like Threw that part in
Just do it
I just don't
I'm looking it up and seeing why
Why you shouldn't
A lot of people are like
Oh dude you got it
You can get nutrients from the pits
But I'm like okay
The plant toxin person
Is present in high concentrations
Both avocado seeds and leaves.
Known to cause toxic effects and possibly even death in a variety of animals,
including cattle, horses, sheep, goats, mice, rats, rabbits, guinea pigs, and certain birds.
That doesn't explain why they had to make it so he wouldn't eat them.
Yeah.
What the hell?
Why can't he eat them?
This is like they had to put this into his prison sentence.
It's important enough that they did.
All right, I'm glad we came back and covered this now.
I am so confused.
I'm literally looking up all the things here.
I can't figure it out.
I can't figure it out.
I can't either.
I have no idea why.
It's blowing my mind.
There's got to be a reason.
I don't know that there is one.
It might just be something crazy they said,
and they're just like, fine, you're banned from eating those.
That's all I can think of. i just can't figure it out i'm scrolling through all this information
online and i just can't figure out why they would possibly ban him from eating it like the the
implication is he wants to eat them so much that they had to be like you gotta stop dude you gotta
stop are they saying that avocados caused him to go crazy and strip naked? That's all I can think of.
It's like, I don't know.
It's just adding layers to this story I was not expecting,
and I'm not sure I think we can handle the answers, really.
Yeah, I think we got to let it stop.
Let it go to the side.
Let it...
I mean, the internet is saying, like, look, don't eat avocado seeds.
I get it.
No one should.
That's why we take them out of the avocado.
We've been doing that forever.
But why specifically for this guy?
A lot of questions.
A lot of questions.
No answers.
No answers.
We'll never get one.
Well, that is the story of this podcast.
A lot of questions.
No answers.
But we'll be back to do it again next week.
Until then, Crandor, hit them with the socials.
We've got so many socials.
We've got youtube.com slash coxandcrandorpodcast where we upload all these podcasts.
You can go back, listen to the Karate Witch one.
You can listen to last week's one about Shrek.
You've got a whole bunch of them.
Cut off the podcast part. You've got the
animations. Go watch all the funny animations.
We got the League of Legends one from last month
up there. Very good.
We also got Spotify, iTunes,
SoundCloud. Just search Cox and Crandor.
You'll find us. Also, follow our
own stuff. We got YouTube.com slash Jesse Cox.
YouTube.com slash Crandor. YouTube.com
slash Warhammer Crandor, if you like Warhammer. We got Twitch.tv Jesse Cox, YouTube.com slash Crendor, YouTube.com slash Warhammer Crendor, if you like Warhammer.
We got Twitch.tv
Jesse Cox, Twitch.tv slash Crendor.
We were playing Chivalry
the other night. That was fun. We'll probably do that again.
We got
Twitter, Jesse Cox, Twitter, Crendor,
Instagram, Notorious Cox, Instagram,
Crendor is taken, Facebook, Crendor,
Facebook, Jesse Cox.
Like, comment, subscribe.
Thumbs up. Review.
Five stars. Yep.
Wahoo! Wahoo.
Alright, well that's it for us. Thanks so much.
And we'll see y'all next time. So as always,
to be continued.