Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 304 - Castle Crashers
Episode Date: August 30, 2021The boys are back and this time they've got a date with Muncie Indiana! Who knew one place could hold so much Bob Ross and Garfield?! Also Crendor find a love for castles and harassing Jesse about cof...fee... or is it espresso? All this and a woman taking her cow for a joy ride on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Visit http://joinhoney.com/cox to get Honey for free. Go to http://meundies.com/crendor to get 15% off your first order and free shipping!
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Today's episode is brought to you by Honey.
Honey's out there trying to save you some money.
Also, today we're brought to you by MeUndies.
MeUndies are the undies that I have on my body currently, presently, and will for some time.
Because they feel so good.
Unless they have a reason to take them off. Right, Grendor? Right?
Uh, sure.
Thanks, pal.
Alright, let's jump into this podcast.
Hello, everybody.
It's time for Ghost on Trend Dog.
This is Trend Dog in the morning.
In the morning.
Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live.
In 4-hour recording studio.
Recording.
Wake your ass up. It'sax Grenda in the morning.
Oh, hey.
Oh, what's up? Oh, hi. Hello.
Hello, hey, hi. Hi, hello.
You know, right at the top, before we start.
All right.
If, let's say, around December 12th, you want to go to Chicago.
Let's just say you want to go to Chicago and see a live show. And let's say you're also, I'm going to beg, vaccinated.
Let's say you're also vaccinated.
That would be good. And you want to come to beg vaccinated. Let's say you're also vaccinated. That would be good.
And you want to come to a show.
I'm just letting you know one is in the works.
And more information soon.
And I would love for you to be there.
Because last time we had a ton of fun.
And then we were going to do another show.
And then COVID happened.
And then a year and a half went by.
Yes.
So I'm just saying. I've been out into public now and I miss it.
Last night I went out with our dear friend, our dear friend Josh,
Lore as you may know him.
Yes.
And hung out with him and his lovely lady.
And we went and like drank a bunch of crazy beers at this crazy brewery.
I've never had so many weird sour beers or beers that were made from churros or whatever my entire life.
It was great.
Super fun.
And because there were no rules, we brought pie and ate pie.
And it was perfect.
A perfect night.
And I realized, man, I want to do that more often.
But this was like a very small brewery place.
Everyone in there, there was like people playing card games and stuff.
So it wasn't like packed, crowded, crazy place.
It seemed like a bunch of nerds being nerds.
And then like, you know, there was a lot of spacing between seating.
And there was a lot of people outside and stuff like that.
So it felt safe relatively to where I've been before.
The only other time I've gone out that was in sort of a barry setting, it hit 7 PM and
I was like, there's too many like 19 year olds here or whatever.
They look way too young to be at this bar and they're all like on top of each other.
And I was like, this is how they get me no i'm out i uh i went and got food with my one friend last week and we were like
a it was like a bar thing there wasn't like that many people there but one guy at the bar looked
over at us and he was like you look like the guy from Hanson. You specifically?
Yes.
And I said, you know what?
Maybe I do.
And he was like, I think he was an older, probably late 40s, early 50s, bald Irish man.
Oh, so my dad was there?
What do you mean? It quite possibly could have been your dad.
He definitely, we thought it was a German accent at first,
and then we overheard him mentioning Irish and how he's Irish.
Interesting.
I mean, he could have a little German accent and still be Irish.
That's possible, yeah.
So there's like an Irish dude who lives in Germany who picked up a little accent.
That has to have happened.
That's true. It has to have.
Speaking of people that look like you though,
this past week, come on.
That video that I sent
you, that dude looks like you.
Oh, that one.
That guy looks like the tattooed
version of you. He's got more
facial, he's got more everything.
Back to work rebuilding
a wooden boat.
Yeah.
He's in that video for all of like two minutes.
They're like, what do you do?
He's like, I'm the captain, I build boats.
And I'm like, that is
Crandor's doppelganger. If you go
online internet, I'm going to make this
the image for this episode, which is what
I'm going to do.
And it is
straight up just this guy
who looks like an
older, I'm going to say
more over
at Crandor.
Maybe that is me.
Maybe that's future you.
Just in a weird time dimension.
Yeah, he like builds boats.
He's got the hair. He's got the beard.
The only thing I can't really tell is because he's got giant
sunglasses, so it's hard to make out
the rest of him. But like, come
on. You're more ripped than he
is though. I'll say that. That's true.
You've got like musculature
and he's kind of like
work on boats and
drink marijuana.
He's definitely drinking marijuana. Oh yeah.
He's drinking his marijuana. He also has a
tattoo of a garbage cane.
And he has a tattoo that
looks kind of like
some sort of creature on his
arm. What is that?
Do you see that thing on his shoulder? It's like a
like a bug creature.
What is that?
It's like something that crawls out of a tree to ask you a riddle
what the hell is that i think this this is like if i decided if i had like a youtube and everything
didn't work out years ago and then i was just like well what am i gonna do now i'm like oh
go to like alaska and work on a boat yeah i, I guess I'll build wooden boats. I mean, that's what this whole show?
I don't know what this is.
This is clearly episode four of something.
Unless it really is episode 104, which is crazy.
But it seems like it's episode 104 of a TV show where it's like dudes building wood boats from scratch.
Which, by the way, is super cool.
Yeah.
I think that's neat to just build a boat from scratch. That's like
old school cool. But this
guy, he's like,
yeah, I have a company. We build boats.
And he just
I can't believe he exists.
People all the time are like,
dude, that guy looks like you. And I know
there is a large contingent of
fat nerd who we are all doppelgangers of each other.
Red beard.
Oh, yeah, like the black shirt.
I get it.
I know who we are.
But I've never seen another Krendor.
And this is pretty impressive to me.
Yeah, that is honestly like a distant relative or something.
I don't know.
Oh, yeah.
And he's got the creative working on stuff.
Like, I'm building miniature boats over here.
He's building real boats.
It's almost the same thing.
Yeah, practically.
Yeah?
The hard part is I don't know exactly what he looks like
because the beard and the hair.
Like, he definitely has Unabomber vibes.
You don't know what this guy's really up to.
Like, why are you building these boats, my friend?
What's going on with you?
But, all put together, he definitely has a Crandor vibe.
I don't know if you'd be walking around with, like, a dirty button-up sleeveless shirt.
That definitely at one point had sleeves, but he cut those sleeves off yeah that's the difference i prefer my like
athleisure uh clothing yeah you don't do buttons buttons like not part of your life
yeah no i just have like i have like some short sleeve sleeve shirts and i got like some lululemon
shirts which like those shirts i love that you have. I love because you're like vent the air.
They do.
They're very breathable.
Sure.
You got to breathe.
You got to breathe up in there.
I'm all about comfort.
Yeah, you're like quiet from Metal Gear.
You have to breathe through your skin.
That's why you wear so many bikinis.
What?
That is a joke for the that's a deep cut for the nerds out there for the nerds and i'm
gonna say perverts i'm not nerdy enough for that one or perverted yeah you're right you're right
stick to my sports reference someone out there there's many comments in this video like nailed
it jesse hilarious joke they're gonna love it your kids
are gonna love it so yeah i don't know uh it does uh i was gonna i was gonna bring up a tweet you
made because i thought oh oh no it was a while ago so you said no um where was it oh yeah here it is
uh pretty much a guy spilled your drink and then then he was like, you did this or something.
And then you had people being like, this idiot's ordering coffee.
Yes, that did happen this week.
Blew my mind.
I couldn't believe.
So the one that set me off.
So I tweeted about how earlier this week I ordered coffee.
I was at the office ordered coffee and uh the guy driving the car pulled up and he like lift up the bag and it was
just dripping with coffee and he was like bro oh your coffee spilled on my car bro god he was like
so mad i was like sorry right like what do i say like you know you literally spilled my coffee
i was like should i get a refund what should i do and he's like i don't know i gotta clean my
damn car now i was like i mean it's not my fault you know that right he's like dude you did oh
this is so dumb and he like drove off that's like ordering at a restaurant and they bring out your
food and drop it they're like oh my, oh my God, look what you did.
Yeah.
And I just couldn't believe that he was so mad at me.
And so I had to take my coffee immediately to the dumpster because it was, the things
were open.
The bag was literally half filled with coffee.
I was like, oh my God.
Did you like report it?
Yeah.
I mean, I got a refund and then they were like, we'll send one out to you for free.
I was like, great.
But I tweeted, hey, I got a refund. And then they were like, well, send one out to you for free. I was like, great. But I tweeted, hey, I got this coffee.
And there was one comment that was something along the lines of like, I can't believe you ordered one coffee.
And I was like, time out, time out.
Where in my tweet did I say ordered one?
I said coffee.
Isn't the plural of coffee, coffee?
Should I have said coffees? I don't know what you, I said coffees i don't know what you i was
like i don't know what you want from me the internet was just like let me tell you why
you're such a stuck up stuck up american because you ordered coffee and i was like
i i ordered more than one drink like why are you upset with me i don't understand they're like
i don't just make coffee the office is like it was espresso-based. Well, there's your problem.
You've got to define it.
You shouldn't have to.
You shouldn't have to.
Well, all right.
You're hitting coffee elitist creme d'or tears.
All right.
It bothers me when people are like, I'm getting a coffee.
But I'm like, coffee is like you brew it, and it's there.
That's a coffee.
Other things are like lattes, espressos.
But if it's iced coffee, I don't know what they make That's a coffee. Like other things are like lattes, espressos. But if it's ice
coffee, I don't know what they make with the ice coffee. I imagine that's just coffee.
Ice coffee is just coffee with ice in it. Okay. But if you're going out with friends
and you're going to say a cafe and someone says, yo, what are you guys going to get?
And you say coffee that covers the general scope of brewed coffee to espresso to cold coffees and iced coffees and frozen Frappuccino things.
It covers the whole thing.
All I'm saying is, you only have 200-some-80 characters.
Coffee fits.
The point wasn't that I got coffee.
The point was the coffee I did get, the guy spilled it and blamed it on me.
But no one focused on that part. Everyone
focused on the part where they're like, this
dumbass American.
What an idiot. So
lazy they are. They can't even make them
like, what are you talking? I can't
even treat myself to some good
coffee. I think if you would have defined
it more, it makes it a little more pig. Because when
you say like they spilled my coffee, I picture
someone just like a, you know, like starbucks venti coffee and they just spilled
it in the thing but if you say like oh they spilled my latte it's a little more like oh okay
that's a like they had to fancy make that here's the thing it's all in there you and i you and i
both know if i said he spilled my latte there would be people different people in my chat being
like this latte drinking american son of a bitch over there drinking his dumb lattes.
Who do you think you are, Mr. Fru-Fru?
No matter what you say, someone's going to yell at you.
Oh, yeah.
There's no win.
I'm arguing for the specifications of this because I like the picture in my head.
Well, I shouldn't have to specify every time I tweet. And if you're wondering, Jesse,
well then why do you
tweet? Great point.
In fact, 90% of the time I go to
tweet a thing, I simply do not. So if you're
wondering why some days there's
no tweets coming from me, it's because I
literally probably had a hot take, said,
nah, I'm good, and deleted it.
Because I can't be asked to
look at everyone and be be like here is what I
think about the opinion that you have and why you're so bad it's like I made a terrible error
um yeah I mean you know I would uh like I said I would have rather been the guy I've been like
look at this guy ordering a latte I don't know No. I would rather not have to deal with that either.
Why can't I just enjoy?
Why can't I just enjoy things?
I mean, I wouldn't care, but I would have preferred to be yelled at for having a latte is what I'm saying.
I don't know how to explain to people.
So it's like, okay, my options are either A, I stop whatever I'm working on, go someplace to get the coffee, come back.
Or continue what I'm working on, get coffee brought to me, continue working, and then leave the office at a reasonable time instead of staying here until like 7 or 8 at night.
I made my bed.
I have chosen to lay in that.
I'm fine paying the extra few dollars for them to bring it to me.
It's not a big deal.
Everyone's like, oh, this asshole.
I'm like, you don't live my life.
You don't pay my sub.
Get out of here.
I mean, it's also a thing where, like, I feel like if you're only doing it so often, like, whatever.
But if, like, you know, you're doing it every day, maybe that's like, uh, it's getting a little crazy or something.
It just depends on what my vibe is.
Some days I'm like, I guess I'll make a coffee here at the office.
And some days I'm like, you know, I could use like a low fat triple frappe snooze little
boozle with extra whipped cream and a slurpy burpee.
You know what I mean?
Like some days you just want to have fun.
Yeah. You got to get that slurpy burpee though You know what I mean? Like, some days you just want to have fun. Yeah.
You got to get that slurpy burpy, though.
You got to ask for it special.
See, it's like, okay, the coffee elitist in me, right?
I understand where you're coming from.
It has like espresso and stuff, which is a form of coffee.
But when you just blend all the things of coffee together, it doesn't work for me. I wouldn't blend a form of coffee. But when you just blend all the things of coffee together,
it doesn't work for me.
I wouldn't blend the things of coffee.
Who's going to blend the things of coffee?
You just did by saying I'm getting a coffee.
Why do I have to be specific
to say I'm purchasing
a latte?
And so that makes you comfortable.
Why do I have to make you comfortable with my
purchase? Because that's our society.
Well, that's a problem.
Well, that's literally everybody today.
I don't get on you when you're like, I bought my $26 Moroccan fresh grind that came from a monkey's anus.
Yeah, but I'm specifying that I bought a Moroccan anus coffee.
Yeah, but I wouldn't be like
this idiot i would be like oh what was that like how did it taste i wouldn't be like oh this guy
okay here's what here's what i'm getting at all right i'll give you an example
all right if i get a frappuccino yeah okay and i drink that frappuccino a lot of times
it's so sweet that i need black coffee to balance it out afterwards because i oh, my God, the bitterness of that coffee is going to balance it out.
I'm not going to be like, man, I just had this sweet coffee.
I'm going to need a coffee to balance out that coffee.
Oh, right.
But if you went to a place and you ordered, like everyone at the table ordered something, right?
And you ordered, like everyone at the table ordered something, right?
And then you went to go tell people that you were ordering drinks with everyone at that place. And everyone was like, oh, what are you having?
You wouldn't proceed to then list every single drink being ordered, would you?
Yes.
That's, I would've been like, we're all having coffee.
That's it.
But if you go up to order it and go, we'll have five coffees.
But you wouldn't say that. No. That's what i'm saying but it's quick to the point not everyone needs to know every damn
thing you're doing you just say hey we're having coffee like last i said last night we ate pie and
drank stuff i didn't say like well we had one cherry pie and we had one pie that was like a
weird like chocolate pie that i had. A pie can be
a specified general thing.
So you're like, what kind of pie are you having? When you say
coffee, the problem is that
if you have coffee, people I think instantly
think of brewed coffee.
I don't think that's true.
I don't think everyone thinks
of brewed coffee. I don't think that's true.
I think when you say coffee,
people think of
water that's black. People think when you say coffee, people think of water
that's black.
People think of black water and they think of
the ways you can drink it.
That's it. That's all they're thinking about.
I don't know that people... You are hyped up
on coffee because you're the
coffee connoisseur. You're just like,
I have all these things of coffee, but I like
my espresso and I like this. It's just like wine
people. You're like, yeah, I'm having wine. They're like, what kind of wine? I don't know. I don't know wine. Well, but I like my espresso, and I like this. It's just like wine people.
They're like, yeah, I'm having wine.
They're like, what kind of wine?
I'm like, I don't know.
I don't have a wine.
Well, I'm also a wine person.
I know.
I'm aware.
There's going to be things you got, or you're just like, everybody's going to be bothered by something. It's like somebody might be, you know, you might be like a lore nerd with like Final Fantasy or something.
Be like, the thing, and I'm just like, eh, whatever.
It's story.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Right.
But my point is that I wouldn't then show up if you're like, I just did this thing in Final Fantasy.
Like I just went to a dungeon in Final Fantasy.
I'm not going to show up and be like, actually, that was a raid.
Raid mechanically is different from a, like, I'm not going to do that to you.
I would never do that to you.
There is somebody that's going to do it, though.
Oh, yes!
And I'm saying stop that.
I'm saying stop it.
Let people enjoy.
Let people have fun.
No, you don't get to have fun.
This is my coffee grounds.
This is where I got my coffee grounds.
Oh, my goodness.
I think...
Okay, I get it.
Like, I used to be worse with it.
I don't really care as much anymore.
I'm like, you know what?
It's like a form of coffee, whatever.
But I feel like if you're doing a tweet or something,
I feel like specifying what kind of coffee it is
is going to be good for the tweet
because you're painting a picture, you're writing.
But it wasn't the problem with the tweet.
The tweet problem that people had
was they were mad that I was ordering drinks to me rather
than going to get them.
But I thought you said there were people who were mad because you're like, oh, you can
make coffee in 20 seconds.
Oh, well, there were some people who were like, I'm mad that you ordered coffee when
you can just make coffee at home.
Or they were like, you ordered one coffee?
I was like, no.
I didn't reply to them because I don't feel like it's justified me replying.
But, like, I didn't order one coffee.
I never mentioned one coffee.
You just assumed that I was speaking of a singular rather than a plural.
Now I know from now on I have to say coffees.
Or get specific.
But it wasn't lattes.
It was a numerous amount of things.
It wasn't just, it was, like, coffee plus like a drink, like an iced tea drink.
Like it was just, you know, you know what I'm saying?
You could have said ordered drinks.
I could, you know what?
I could have said that.
I could have said that, but I didn't.
And there is no edit function, so I got destroyed on Twitter by a bunch of people in Europe who were like Americans.
It's like, oh my God.
Oh my God. Oh my God.
Oh my God.
All I wanted to do was just say
this guy was being an asshole, and it
was funny to me that he was upset.
And then people were like,
Americans, taking all the
coffee. And I was like, oh
my ass.
Yeah, I mean,
I wouldn't have did that.
I'm just, yeah. that's all i'm saying
is you can you can judge me you can get on you can judge me just don't do it on twitter
just privately in your own home be like this asshole and that's fine i'll be okay with that
it's uh i also as your friend just like to poke you with a stick a bit
how dare you how dare you do this?
Because really, I would have read that thing and been like, oh, that sucks.
And I just kept scrolling my Twitter and being like, man, why am I looking at Twitter and closed it?
Well, speaking of coffee, this week I went to a bagel place that's kind of near the office.
It's all right.
It's solidly all right.
They do have a great bacon, egg, and cheese bagel on a spinach bagel, if you will.
Very good.
Delicious.
But when I was there, there was a guy in front of me who looked, I'm going to say, 95.
He was shaking the entire time. He was like Shaking the entire time
He was old, frail
But this man knew exactly what he wanted
And he began to order a bagel
Like some people order lattes
See I did that for you, I was about to say coffee
But like lattes
And so I had to write down everything he said
Because it was so detailed
He wrote, or he said
I want an everything bagel one pass rub
off of the everything so i imagine he wanted them to scrape some of the everything off
and then he said hollow out the bagel cream cheese two scoops aside crispy as crispy as
possible almost burnt and the woman just went okay. And just went in and did it.
It was crazy.
I imagine he's like, that's his thing.
But I thought about what he was saying,
and I was like, okay, so he got an everything bagel,
but he doesn't really want all of the everything.
Then he wanted them to scoop out the insides of the bagel
so that when they cut it,
most of the bread on the inside's gone, I imagine.
Then two scoops of cream cheese on each side and then i guess so that cream cheese took up most of the inside of the bagel and then he wanted them to burn the hell out of it and i was like you know
what that's crazy but that man knows exactly what he wants he doesn't he's not here to play around
he's got like days left.
He's like, I don't give a shit.
Make my bagel the way I want it.
And I was like, you know what?
I need to be like this guy more often.
This guy does seem like a guy.
He knows what he wants.
And you know what?
If I was like, what the shit?
Then I wouldn't be able to get.
I'd be hypocritical and go to other things and be like, where's my double shot, blah, blah, blah, right?
Yeah.
It's just I've never seen that at anything but a coffee.
A coffee enthusiast.
Yeah, or drinks in general.
Or like if you go to a restaurant, sometimes a person, especially in LA,
sometimes you go to a restaurant with a person and they'll be like,
yes, I see here you have a Caesar salad.
Is it a chance that I could purchase a Caesar salad minus the chicken plus shrimp minus the Caesar plus a nice vinaigrette?
And then instead of the normal salad, can you put in a different veggie mix, if you would?
You're like, did you just order an entirely different menu item and then just say it was the Caesar?
Because that way they're like, yes, sir, of caesar and because they're like yes sir of course
we can you're like what the hell is happening can i get a cheeseburger but like replace the burger
with like a chicken breast and then maybe put like cheese on top of like pepper jack instead
of cheddar and then maybe like lettuce tomato hold everything else like you just order a chicken
sandwich it's like um no they do not hear me it was a cheeseburger
with chicken minus the burger please yeah like i feel like some people just make it overly complex
just to do it or sound fancier they're they're i don't know if this is like an apocryphal tale
but apocryphal yes that's uh that's that's your million dollar million dollar word an apocryphal that's your million dollar word
an apocryphal tale
apocryphal
uh oh are we in the definition?
empirical
how do you spell this?
apocryphal
apocryphal
I can't find it
you can't find apocryphal?
Of or relating to anaphora?
I think you just made this word up.
A-P-O-C-R-Y-P-H-A-L.
Apocryphal.
Apocryphal. Apocryphal.
Yes.
Of doubtful authenticity.
Yes.
I don't know if this is a true story is what I'm trying to say.
There's a million dollar word.
Apocryphal.
I don't know if this is true, but I heard that, I don't know which musician this is but one of the musicians
and i'm sure someone will let us know would write in his his contracts all of his contracts and in
his dressing room he wanted green m&ms and everyone was like oh what an asshole this guy is
but the reason why it was in there what he said was that he was like i wanted to make sure they
read the contract so i would get everything that I signed up for
So in there it would say
In the dressing room a bowl of green M&M's
And so I wonder
If that's kind of like
The vibe of
People
Who are like
I'm an executive, I'm a businessman
So I'm going to go to a restaurant
And I'm going to give them the most complicated order
to make sure they're listening to me.
Now, I could have ordered a chicken sandwich,
but I think they should listen to me.
So I'm going to give them a complicated order
for a chicken sandwich that isn't a chicken sandwich.
Right?
Like that kind of thing.
I don't know.
Or they're just assholes.
But.
Probably the lighter.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Apocrypha. Apocryphal. Apocryph lighter. Yeah. I don't know. Apocrypha.
Apocryphal.
Apocryphal.
Yeah.
Most of it is, it's like urban legends and things like that.
Oh, I see.
Right.
Or sometimes it's, there's a lot of parts of the Bible that they say were left out.
Oh, yeah.
So people are like, oh, that's like an apocryphal tale.
Like it's something that was like biblical, but not like that kind of thing. Oh yeah. So people are like, oh, that's like an apocryphal tale. Like it's something
that was like biblical, but not like that kind of thing. I see. Interesting. It's like
the stuff they chose not to include. Yeah. I thought that is the Dead Sea Scrolls. Maybe
that counts. I'm not sure, but I know there's many books that were written that are considered
like canonical to the Bible.
They're like, nah, leave them out.
Yeah.
Yeah, interesting.
I think that was the, uh, it was like the Catholic Church thing, right?
In the medieval times, they, like, went through, or what's his name?
Uh, that guy, you know.
Yeah, it was like in the, in 1030-something, 10-something.
Was it Constantinople?
It might have been.
It's one of those.
One of those, like, older kings.
Well, it would have been Constantine then.
Constantine.
I think that's it.
And so, yeah, they decided what to keep and what not.
And so, yeah, that's why people are like, wait, why are there these other things that were written and you chose to leave them out?
And I'm sure like, well, look, I'm sure there's a lot of politics and a lot of nonsense was involved.
And what we got is what we got.
Oh, my God.
Speaking of the kings, I've been learning about castles.
Wait, what?
Yeah.
So what is that?
What a castle?
No, I thought you said I I've been learning about castle.
Castles.
Oh, I didn't hear the S.
I was like, I've been learning about castle.
I'm like, and?
What does that mean?
I've been learning about the castle, yes.
Because I'm writing my book and everything, so I want to design a main castle.
And I was like, well, I don't even know.
I know about video game castles, and I know what's in castles, but I don't know how they're laid out
So I was like I'm gonna watch thing on castle so I went straight to YouTube and of course
There's like some top tier castle building things and the one was pretty good
Where's just like this type of castle would be like this and then you'd upgrade if you had money and blah blah
blah and then i learned uh decent amount about castles there's some crazy castles out there
they're showing all the like big ones from like civilizations and stuff there's like
uh i think there's one in syria or uh one of those places there's one in like the dover castle
in england's pretty crazy i think there's one in Spain. There's like the crazy one in Poland with the Teutonic Knights.
There's some crazy castles.
What I think you'll love is one of my favorite parts of history
is when things rapidly change.
So, for example, when everyone had horses
and then suddenly there were cars, like that kind of vibe.
Oh, yeah.
And one of my favorite parts of history is all the Kings of Europe built
castles,
right?
You protect yourself.
So you have like a moat to protect yourself from like troops on the ground.
You have strong fortified walls that are like super,
super thick to protect yourself from,
from catapults and all sorts of different things.
And they're very high to protect you from like guys climbing over it.
And you're, you know, you from guys climbing over it.
And maybe you're up against a cliff face, or maybe you're up on a hill.
So people can't just eat.
All these different strategies they made.
Yeah.
And then some asshole came along and was like, let me tell you about cannons.
And suddenly everything about castles had to change, because they were like, one shot can tear down that wall.
We got this.
And I love that part of history because suddenly it's like every monarchy being like,
oh my god, what do we do?
And so they start building wacky-ass castle designs in order to prevent cannon fire
or to keep cannons from kind of like messing with their fortifications.
And so they start having weird points and sharp little areas
and it's incredible.
It's so silly.
That and boats.
When boats, when they were like,
alright, we have to stop cannons
from hitting us. What do we do?
And they just start putting iron
all over boats and then
the cannonballs start bouncing off and then you end up with
battles where it's like two ships firing on each other and they can do no damage to each
other so they're like well all right i guess we'll uh see you guys next time and they just like go
their separate ways because nothing happens oh yeah that is pretty funny those are the best parts
of history where everyone's like we don't know what we're doing. We're just shooting at each other until we figure it out. It's crazy.
I didn't realize how much, like, how, like, there's, like, crazy traps and stuff in castles, too,
where they got, like, there's, like, the murder holes because they, like, get through the one gate
and they're like, we're in, and then, like, another gate's there and it closes
and then they, like, dump oil and shit on them.
Yeah, yeah, that's why they have In most castles that sort of like
First gate second gate
Kind of cave system you know what I mean
Yeah cause I was like yeah why do they do that
And I was like oh that's where they kill people
Yeah you think you're in one
And it's like you idiot
And then you know then the bodies are stuck there
And so you have to wait over your fellow knights
And soldiers and that's a pain in the ass
That's why sieging castles most of the time It was just like we'll wait a few months and let them starve to death
yeah yeah that's uh that makes sense now because i was trying to learn about sieges too so i was
like yeah sieges you got like your siege weapons but then sieges would just last forever because
it's like they don't actually want to attack it so like god that's gonna be annoying yeah it was
mostly about your morality level because you could like a lot of the time they
would be like, all right, do we have sick and wounded?
Great.
Throw them on the catapult and fling them in there and get everyone in the castle of disease.
Oh, yeah, that would make sense.
Or like, oh, they have a like a river that goes into the castle.
Damn up the river.
So they dive like water thirst, dehyd like, water thirst. Dehydration.
Water thirst.
I forgot the name.
Water thirst.
Sir, we're dying of water thirst. God damn.
What do we do?
That's what they would have called it in the olden days.
The old water thirst.
We must need
water.
Yeah, I mean, when you think about it, you're like, yeah, nobody will penetrate the castle.
And then it's like, what do we do if we want to go out and we're trapped?
And you're like, uh-oh.
I guess they build tunnels and stuff.
Yeah, so there's a lot of famous castles that have secret tunnels into town.
And most of the time, there were also secret rooms. So a lot of the time a castle would be built and then not every person building the castle had all the information about how the castle worked.
So it would be like the guys on the walls wouldn't have the information about like the inside, right?
Or the guys on the inside wouldn't know what the bed chambers looked like, that kind of thing.
And then usually in the king's – there was like, I don't know, maybe one or two secret rooms.
And most of the time they were supposed to be where the king and his family would hide if, you know, there was an invasion.
And it was one of those things where it was really hard to find and then probably had a back exit to get out.
But usually what it was is where the king's mistress would live.
And then there was a back way so that she could come and go During the day and then stay there at night
And the king would be like
Oh yes I've got to go check the taxes
And he'd like leave
You know that kind of thing
And it would be one of those things
Like keep it secret from everyone
Even the family so only the king knew
There's actually oh my god
There's a really great story that we did on Chiluminati
About a castle in Scotland that has a secret hidden room.
And, you know, up until the 1900s, like in the 1800s, there's this legend of like a monster living in this castle.
And everyone thinks supposedly it was maybe a disfigured family member that they hid away in this part of the castle.
But no one to this day can find the secret room.
Even the wife of the duke at the time,
when he was out of town,
she got all of her friends together,
and they figured, well, it has to have a window, right?
Because it's a castle.
They have to have a window to let air in.
So we're going to go around with white cloth
and hang white cloth out of every single window,
and people outside will check and see what windows we have found.
And according to the legend,
somewhere between,
but by the time the Duke came back,
there was either between four,
four or less windows unidentified.
And they had been everywhere in the castle.
Right.
So who knows?
But then the Duke saw what was going on and was like,
what the hell?
And divorced her,
which is like, Whoa, there is a secret there somewhere so yeah and uh it has never to this day been found and you can literally go to that castle and go on tours they have a tea room that
you can like buy tea and have high tea at it's this real place it's just you know it has there's
a lot of secrets that it was like apparently only the the king, his first son, not the king, the duke, his first son and the groundskeeper knew the location of the secret room.
And then they, I mean, did they find it?
Like, did they get it?
They never found it.
They never found it.
They never found what was hidden there. All they know is that in the late 1800s, early 1900s,
the grandson of the Duke was offering to rent out
the castle to people
and have people stay there.
So they assumed
at that point,
whatever the thing was,
whatever was going on there
was over.
If it was a person,
that person had died.
And so he felt comfortable
renting out the space.
Huh.
But it has never once been looked into.
I mean, like, there's been stories, and people have gone there.
Like, there was one guy who said that he saw, like, a creature on the walls.
There's one guy who was a doctor who said that at night he was walking down a hallway that he had just like
discovered on accident and at the end was a wall just a solid wall but when he put his hand on it
the the brick was still wet like it had just been put there and the next day they told him to leave
to like go home and uh the groundskeeper there's a story about how a famous opera singer was staying
with the you know with the du Duke and the people in the house.
And it was snowed that night.
And everyone was like, oh, groundskeeper, you can stay for the night.
Don't worry about it.
And he was like, no.
Like, what do you mean?
He's like, no, I'm not going to stay here.
I'm like, why?
And he's like, I wouldn't stay here if you paid me.
This place is like, there's something wrong with it.
So it was like a foot and a half of snow or something like that.
And he made all the servants dig a path a mile down to his house
rather than stay the night in the castle.
That's crazy.
Yeah.
So it's one of those mysteries where it's like, what was the secret?
Who knows?
We'll never know.
Unless we blast it open with gunpowder.
I mean, here's the thing.
We probably could.
It doesn't seem very strong.
It is a national landmark now, so that's probably going to be trouble, but.
We got to convince the Scottish government to blast it open with gunpowder.
Blast it open.
There was one theory that at some point in the history of that castle, like another clan,
like another Scottish clan came to these people for
help and then the clan like vanished and so the theory was that the clan came to these people for
help and they saw it as an opportunity so they put all the clansmen in one room and then sealed it up
and let them just starve to death and they're like now that territory is ours like i don't
there's so many theories about and they're like well maybe that's why everyone was terrified because the secret ever came out.
The whole family would be ruined.
Like that kind of thing.
Oh, yeah.
And no one has a clue.
All I know is that the grandson, the son that was alive in like 1900, he refused to hear the tale from his father.
Because whatever had happened, when his grandfather told his father father his father changed from being like a happy jovial
person to being super depressed
and he was like
I don't want to know don't tell me
and so everyone thinks the story died there
but also apparently
there's rumors that the family was very
theatrical and because
they lived in the middle of nowhere Scotland
a lot of people think the whole thing was made up
just so people would come visit them in the middle of nowhere Scotland, a lot of people think the whole thing was made up just so people would come visit them in the middle of nowhere.
That does also seem plausible.
Yeah. There's so many plausible things
where it's just like, who knows? We'll never know.
But all of them seem like, yeah, that sounds about right.
That sounds like that could be true.
Yeah. Oh my god.
That's awesome.
I know, right? Castles. They're neat.
Castles.
Castles. Well, you. Castles. Castles.
Well, you know what else is neat?
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Now let's go to the traffic.
I'm going to start with the cops.
Grandeur.
Grandeur, how's that traffic out there?
Oh, boy.
Traffic.
Honestly, traffic is pretty standard.
There's a lot of cars.
There's a lot of backups.
I thought I'd take this time to talk about types of coffees.
First up, you have brewed coffee.
It's done with gravity in some way.
Frequently a cone drip.
Then you've got espresso, which is a finer grind of coffee in hot water under pressure.
You've got the Americano espresso with water, an attempt to make an espresso about as concentrated as brewed coffee.
You've got your cappuccino. That's espresso with a lot of steamed milk.
A breakfast-only drink in Italy, as well as a cafe latte.
A cortado is an espresso with a drop of steamed milk, a Spanish drink.
A macchiato, that's an Italian name for a cortado.
Then you got your mocha, that's hot chocolate with coffee, pretty much.
Then you got your frappuccino, which is, I think, possibly invented by Starbucks, according to this,
with a lot of iced coffees blended with sugar and stuff.
And there you go. Back to you.
What about an affogato?
I don't know what that is.
You don't know what an affogato... Oh, my
crendor. Affogato?
Oh, my God.
Affogato. Imagine
the best... Italian coffee-based dessert.
Ooh, imagine
delicious ice cream and then one shot of espresso,
and then you pour the espresso over the ice cream.
That does sound pretty good.
It's very good.
It's very good.
Speaking of coffee ice cream, Trader Joe's got pretty good coffee ice cream.
I don't know that I can handle coffee ice cream.
I would enjoy a Trader Joe's Speculoos ice cream.
You know what I mean?
I think they got that too.
Cookie butter ice cream?
Oh, that would be good.
I think they actually have that.
Oh, now you're making me want to go to Trader Joe's.
Cookie butter ice cream.
Yeah, they got it.
In fact, I think I had it a long time ago.
I'm telling you right now, coffee bean blast ice cream Trader Joe's.
It's good.
Sounds like too much blast for me.
No, no, no, no.
So much bean blast.
No, it's good.
I'm telling you right now.
You heard it here first.
All right.
Well, you know what else we need to hear?
Weather.
Weather.
Let's go to the old weather.
Weather.
The old weather weather? The old weather weather. The old weather weather?
The old weather weather.
Let's see if we got any recommendations here from the last podcast.
Someone said storms are technically worse than depressions.
Because there's like tropical depressions tropical storms so actually
that must be like a like a drizzle then interesting yeah uh yeah i mean i guess
depression is just the um air pressure right oh oh boy now you make me look this up a depression
weather depression that's probably not going to be the weather depression meaning.
Yeah, an area of low pressure, which moves from west to east in the northern hemisphere.
Low pressure systems, cold fronts, warm fronts.
Yeah, what happens during a depression?
Air rises in a depression, so clouds and rainfall are formed.
Depressions, therefore, bring unsettled weather and rain.
Winds are normally stronger.
But then a storm, I would imagine, is stronger because that's when it's, like, happening.
Oh.
Yeah, that does make sense.
Yeah, you can always tell.
I think most people can tell.
You know that, like, feeling you get right before a storm?
I wonder if that's the low-pressure depression.
You know what I mean?
Yes.
You can just tell.
The whole area, the weather effect changes.
Can't they affect your joints and stuff?
It's not a pressure, Cain.
Yeah, I imagine that's why.
People are like, oh, before it rains, it rains my leg always acts up it's probably not
the rain it's probably the pressure
yeah I think you're right
um
are we talking oh yeah so
first
the hurricane hitting
Louisiana
yes watch out for that one
uh
I was watching the Weather Channel a bit
because they always do the thing where they're like,
we're going to go stand in it.
And you're like, okay.
And then they stand in it.
And then you watch it and it becomes terrifying.
It's crazy.
And there's like shit flying all over.
And I'm like, how has nobody on the Weather Channel gotten injured?
Unless they probably have, honestly.
Oh, yeah.
One time we were watching it for one of the hurricanes or whatever it was,
and they were in a building, and behind them just a thing of glass
just flew off and shattered, and they were like,
oh, my God, and they cut the commercial.
I would, too.
I'd be like, you know what?
Nah, I'm all right.
The one time they were filming, it might have been for this one,
some dude just got out of his car and just started running in the hurricane.
They started flying away, and they're like, what are you doing?
Get back here.
They're like, dude, what are you doing?
He started flying away.
Yeah.
They're like, he's going to get hit by debris or something.
Then they got him away, and they're like, dude, what are you doing?
So that was weird.
That was pretty crazy.
It might have been a tornado, but I think it was a hurricane.
I can't believe that.
So FEMA tweeted out, at ReadyGov, tweeted out an infographic
and it's surviving catastrophic flooding.
What a, for something so terrible, This infographic is so
It's something you would see like
Top five places to eat cheeseburgers
In Chicago
Hold on let me send this to you
This is crazy
Look at this thing
It looks like it was designed to tell kids about hurricanes
But it is
Terrifying when you look at it
Oh my god it is
Like do not attempt to travel
In flooded areas
People escaping flood waters
As a last resort do not stay in the attic
You could become trapped
Literally they're like get on the roof call 911
I like how the dude on the roof is just like
Haha I'm calling 911
Right
Man I
I heard on The radio that there's an island uh that apparently has only
one road leading to it and on the island of all the people that decided to stay 26 were fire and
rescue and police officers but then there were just another 26 people that decided to stay there.
And I was like, all right, I understand cops and everything.
They probably have like a system in place, right?
But everyone else, the other 26, sometimes I wish you could just be like,
get out.
We're making you leave.
It seems like such, I know personal freedoms and whatnot, but come on.
You are now putting yourself in danger.
What's going to put all these other people in danger?
It's crazy to me.
I don't know.
You're on an island with one road.
That road is probably gone now.
Oh, yeah.
No, it's definitely gone.
Without a doubt.
I just can't.
You know, I'm like like maybe you should just flee I
guess some people don't have the ability
to do so but still true too I have to
imagine that if the government was doing
its job would be like look we'll put you
up in a place get out yeah but they're
probably not doing their job you are
crap we got a weather request for Muncie, Indiana, home of Garfield the Cat,
the Joy of Painting, and Failed Show, Armed and Famous.
What?
Yes.
The Failed Show, Armed and...
Here we go.
Armed and Famous.
Armed and Famous.
Armed and Famous.
What would have been...
What was that?
Eric Estrada.
What?
Jack Osborne.
Trish Zratis.
What the...
Latoya Jackson.
Yeah, what is this?
What was this show?
It was on ABC?
Or is that CBS.
What's the one with the eye.
With the eye.
I think.
I got CBS.
Yeah it's CBS.
I know you're talking about now.
Oh I guess this is a show where they're all going to learn to be cops.
Oh I see.
Actually I think I kind of remember.
I remember the
Who's a what's it for this
I just realized that
Wee Man is in this show
Trish Trash, Eric Estrada, and Wee Man
And Latoya Jackson? Who's the other guy?
There's just one other guy
That I don't know who this person is
Who is this?
Oh, the other guy is Jack Osborne
Wow
He doesn't look like himself at all
Oh yeah, no
Not at all
Jack Osborne has gone through many, many, many looks
I remember fat Jack Osborne
I remember curly hair Jack Osborne
You know what?
There's so many Jack Osborne Now Jack Osborne has I remember curly hair Jack Osborne. You know what? There's so many Jack Osborne.
Now Jack Osborne has like, he actually looks old.
Damn, Jack.
What happened?
I think I only remember reality show Jack Osborne.
Yes, where he had like his little curly hair and the big glasses.
Yeah.
Now he's like, has multiple divorces and shit.
What?
People got old so quickly.
I know.
Shit's crazy.
Anyway, this is Muncie, Indiana.
So, I mean, Garfield the cat was born here, and then Bob Ross, though.
So, I mean, 87 degrees Fahrenheit currently.
15% chance of rain through 7 p.m. on this Sunday.
93 degrees for the high.
Pretty hot.
72 for the low.
Humidity 57%.
Pressure 29.98 inches.
Visibility 10 miles.
Wind 10 miles an hour.
Dew 0.70.
UV index 1 of 10.
And a waning gibbous moon.
Are they getting hit by rain this week?
Yes, they're getting hit by rain right now.
Scattered showers and thunderstorms.
Chance of rain 50%.
Then Monday, 84.
Scattered thunderstorms.
Tuesday, 79 with a.m. showers.
Then you get Wednesday, 80, mostly sunny.
Thursday, 79, sunny.
And then you have multiple days in a row of partly cloudy,
averaging out at about 82 degrees
fahrenheit so a lot of clouds but still pretty warm that's muncie indiana yeah there's a garfield
statue in muncie's historic district wait the garfield statue trail is Garfield, but it's many Garfield statues.
Oh, it's like in cities when they do like all the statues are unicorns.
Oh my God.
Yeah, there it is.
That's amazing.
I love this.
Now that's a trail I'd go to.
Oh, Garfield trail.
Hell yes.
At the end of it, there's the Garfield gift shop
I'm looking at it right now
Oh it's so good
That's actually a really good Garfield gift shop
You can get some weird looking Garfields in there
So many weird looking Garfields
It looks like one Garfield's like a
Like a Russian Garfield
What the hell is it
That's definitely a Russian Garfield
Oh there's a pirate Garfield in the background There's a Garfield riding another Garfield? What the hell is this? That's definitely a Russian Garfield. Oh, there's a pirate Garfield in the background?
There's a Garfield riding another Garfield?
Yeah, that's the wonky Garfield.
This is great.
I love this.
Oh, my God.
Bring your camera.
That's my favorite.
Things to bring.
Camera, friends, and family.
It's actually pretty close to where you used to live in Ohio.
Yes.
Everything's pretty close to where I used to live in Ohio.
If you're looking for things no one wants to look at.
I don't know.
I want to look at that Garfield.
Maybe not for long, though.
That would give you five minutes of entertainment, and then you like all right yeah you're right i guess we'll go look at the the bob ross museum
yeah yeah yeah yeah
that's uh the weather yeah that's what it was. All right, let's go to sports.
Sports.
There's actually not a whole bunch going on in sports.
We got football preseason just ended.
Pretty much, you know, it's the preseason. Now the actual season is coming up, so that's what matters most
because the games count.
Then in the NBA, still about a month away from that happening.
At least preseason, I think.
Then hockey, still about a month away from that preseason.
And baseball.
We're getting towards the end of baseball,
but not enough to really go in-depth about it that much.
Actually, let's check the standings.
We've got to at least see some standings here.
I can't believe you have chosen to skip
over Gardner Minshew.
Oh my god, I almost forgot about it.
You're right.
Hold on, let me do the baseball standings first.
Tampa Bay Rays, first
place. They are at
82-48.
Pretty solid.
What is that?
5.5 up on the Yankees.
Then you've got the White Sox, 10.5 up on Cleveland.
Houston, six games up on Oakland.
And you've got Boston and the Yankees fighting for the wild card over there
as well as Oakland and Seattle right there.
Then in the East, or the NL, you've got Atlanta with Philadelphia 4.5 back.
You've got Milwaukee in first in the Central. You've got San Francisco in first in the West, or the NL, you got Atlanta with Philadelphia 4.5 back.
You got Milwaukee in first and the Central.
You got San Francisco in first and the West with the Dodgers.
Two games back of that.
And then the wild card being fought for by the Padres and the Reds.
And that is baseball standing. So, like you said, we had big news.
Gardner Minshew was traded.
That's right.
He is now a member of the Philadelphia Eagles.
I love that.
Yeah, I mean, the quarterback.
Of all the places he could go.
That, I think, he actually would start there, I think.
It's possible. right now they have
their one quarterback, Jalen Hurts.
He's not a definitive
starter over there. In fact, I think they did this
trade because they're kind of
needing some insurance in case things go
wrong, which it's very possible because
he's had some good games, he's had some bad games,
so it's kind of like, I don't know.
And he's did... I don't know. And he's done.
I don't have any talent at all when it comes to football.
So I'm not going to judge anyone.
But I would say if you put the two of them side by side,
I feel like Minshew is a more talented QB.
I mean, he's definitely played in more games. He has a better mustache.
He has a better mullet.
I don't know anything about his skill,
but he looks better in a cut-off shirt.
If you give him a hat that looks like a trucker hat,
it means you can wear it better.
All I'm saying is the things you need to be a QB, he does well.
I mean, here we go. If we are looking at Gardner.
Don't bring stats into this.
I'm bringing stats into it because I'm a football nerd.
So, if we take a look at this, Jalen Hurts vs. Gardner
Minshew. Alright, last year
Jalen Hurts had his only year played.
It was
1-3 with
1,000 yards, 6 touchdowns,
4 interceptions. Minshew
is 7-13
with 5,500 yards,
37 touchdowns, 11 interceptions.
So, he's got a better quarterback rating.
He's got a higher completion percentage.
He's got more experience.
Honestly, I think he's better.
That's what I'm saying.
So, I wouldn't be too surprised if Minshew starts some games this year
or just takes over.
Well, I mean, we'll see.
We'll see if the world of Philadelphia can handle a good old boy from Florida.
We'll see.
We'll see real quick.
We will see.
I have no idea what's going to happen in that city.
That's going to be great.
Honestly, I'm right.
Plus, it's the NFC East, which is one of the biggest shit show divisions
in the entirety of football. He could shine there. Plus, it's the NFC East, which is one of the biggest shitshow divisions in the entirety of football.
Oh, yeah.
He could shine there.
Oh, yeah.
No, it's going to be good.
I'm excited.
So, that's sports.
Okay.
What is our weird fact that probably I know but don't actually of the day?
Here we go.
Oh, big fact of the day.
The different colors of Froot Lo Loop cereal all taste the same.
They're not individual flavors.
You know what?
I think everyone knew that, I think.
That, like, you know, in a way, you may not have known it, but you, like, understood it.
Because when it goes in the bowl, it all tastes the same.
Yeah, but it does mess with your mind a bit.
I've had some thoughts where I was
like, you know what, I don't think they're
different tastes, but sometimes you look and you're like,
maybe they got a little bit of
different taste to them.
Do you think it's because of the color? Because we eat with our eyes.
It is. It's definitely the color.
Because you see they're different with the colors
and you're like, well, they gotta have different flavors.
Like Skittles, you know? Like you got different flavored Skittles're like, well, they got to have different flavor, like Skittles.
You got different flavored Skittles.
I guess M&M's don't, but still, some people still are like,
I want the green M&M's, but it literally tastes the same.
I mean, I don't know the Skittles world.
I don't do nothing with Skittles. I don't mess with Skittles.
They're too sugary for me.
I used to eat Skittles, but then I haven't really eaten Skittles.
But I heard that they got rid of Lime Skittles, which those are one of the best flavors.
They don't have green Skittles anymore?
They have green, but now they're like green apple Skittles.
Nobody wants green apple Skittles.
You want Lime Skittles.
No more Lime Skittles.
Lime Skittles are back, but only for a limited time.
Limited time? May 21st,
2021. Bring them back.
Says they are.
It says they're back for a limited time.
Oh, never mind. In the form of all
lime Skittles.
What the hell?
That's too much lime. That's far too much lime.
The whole point of the lime is you blend it in with
all the other Skittle flavors so you get a good balance.
Who is running this Skittles company?
I mean, someone who doesn't understand Skittles.
I'm starting to wonder if most people understand any of the products they actually sell.
I feel like at a certain point, everything that becomes big is taken over by people who don't quite get it.
And then they're just like, make us money.
Right?
Yeah, I think you're right.
Well, now, here's the thing.
I don't know if I've even tried a green apple Skittle.
I don't really want one, though.
But maybe now I should go out and buy a lime and a green apple and then do a taste test.
Between a lime and the actual concept of a lime and a green apple?
Of a Skittle. Because you Cause you gotta see which one blends
Good luck with all that
I don't know if that will work but
I mean you know
We each gotta do our own scientific research
The science is out
We'll wait for you to figure it out for us
I will I'll be the scientist here I'll figure it out
You will forget two minutes after this podcast ends.
Probably, yeah.
But as of right now, I'm pretty excited to do this taste test.
All right.
I believe in you.
That's a random fact.
All right.
What's our big news story of the day?
Big news story of the day.
Who puts a cow in a Buick?
A cow spotted in the backseat at McDonald's drive-thru.
Who puts a cow in a Buick?
So here it is.
Is there a photo?
Oh, my God.
That is a cow in a car.
How did it get in there?
Is it alive?
I guess we're going to learn.
Where do you think this happened at?
I'm going to say Cal, Florida.
No, that's a guess for randomness of it, but we're thinking there.
Minnesota.
Close.
Wisconsin.
You know what?
Cheese was involved, of course.
Exactly.
It's got to be Wisconsin.
You know what? Cheese was involved, of course.
Exactly. It's got to be Wisconsin.
Spotted in a car at McDonald's drive-thru in Wisconsin.
In Wisconsin. A cow. All of it.
Jessica Nelson of Mocenie pulled into the drive-thru at McDonald's in Marshfield on Thursday and she looked up to see a cow in the backseat of a Buick sedan three cars ahead of her.
I thought it was fake at first. Who puts a cow in a
Buick, she told the Associated Press.
Then its whole head moved.
Oh my god. She quickly
picked up her phone and shot a video
of the bovine.
Wait, what was her order?
I don't know.
The cow's order or her order?
Would it be weird if you pulled into
a burger place and got a burger with a cow in her back order? Would it be weird if you pulled into a burger place
and got a burger with a cow in your backseat?
Would that be strange?
That would be kind of weird, yeah.
It could have been his friends and family.
You don't know.
That's what I'm saying.
It's a little weird.
I just took the video because I was blown away.
There was a cow in the back of a Buick.
She posted the video on her Facebook page with the caption,
a whole freaking cow.
Tell me you live in Wisconsin without telling me you live in Wisconsin.
I love that my very part just keeps mentioning there was a cow in the back
of a Buick as if for some reason any other car would be acceptable.
Like, why would you put a cow in a Buick?
That doesn't make any sense.
That's a Jeep animal, for sure.
So, we've got some reasoning behind it.
Nelson said that the family of the cow's owner saw the post and contacted her.
They said that the cow was actually a calf.
She said the owner had just purchased it and two other calves,
which were in the back seat as well, but were lying down out of sight.
What?
At an auction.
They, they, what?
So they went to an auction, four cows, got three calves, and were like, well, we didn't
bring a trailer.
Throw them in the back.
Yeah.
I'm looking at this image, and this calf is, its head is the size of the armrest.
Yeah.
Or like the headrest in the back.
Yeah.
All I'm saying is, if there are three others in there, they were like, that doesn't seem comfortable at all.
At least there's two others.
But still, that's a tight fit.
Yeah, it doesn't seem, I don't know.
It is Wisconsin, that's what I mean.
They're like, oh, get in there, eh?
You can do it there, okay.
You like cheese?
You're going to make lots of cheese for me, okay?
Yeah, I mean, I've been to Wisconsin many a times.
It's pretty spot on.
Great. Yeah, that checks, I've been to Wisconsin many a times, and it's pretty spot on. Great.
Yeah, that checks out.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, that's it for us.
Thanks so much for listening and watching.
However you enjoy this podcast, Crandor, hit me with them socials.
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That's it.
Okay.
Well, that's it.
We'll see you all next time.
And as always, I'm going to shake the rhino again because I forgot to talk about the rhino last time I shook him.
To be continued?
To be continued?