Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 388 - Buzzed Boys

Episode Date: June 12, 2023

The boys are back and for roughly 50 minutes Jesse and Crendor move between talking about booze and Nic Cage with absolutely zero eye on the clock only to realize they have to do a show. Yep, it's that kind of episode. Go to http://babbel.com/cox to get up to 55% off your subscription. Go to http://hellofresh.com/cox16 and use code cox16 to get 16 free meals plus free shipping.

Today's episode is brought to you by Babbel. Babbel's gonna help you learn all them languages. Also today, brought to you by HelloFresh. HelloFresh is gonna get you that good food delivered right to your home. Let's jump into this podcast! Hello everybody, it's time for Ghost on Trend Dog! Ghost on Trend Dog in the morning. In the morning! Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live!

In 4-hour recording studio. Recording! Hello everybody, welcome to another exciting episode of Cox and Crandor in the morning. You should just do that. Why am I doing this? You did it. It sounded like a normal person. You said everything and pronounced it correctly. Yeah. Me!

I just, it's a flow of gibberish. Yeah, but this is kind of an episode. That's how I think I sound, so I feel like we're on the same page. I do get a little bit more like my old self for that. Like, hello, everyone. Welcome to Cox and Crandor in the morning. Cox and Crandor. Yeah.

Ah. What's up? Welcome. Hey, thank you. Yeah, this is a very late recording for us. Oh boy, yeah, we are probably both a little buzzed. I'm not gonna lie. I am definitely a little buzzed. I'm like half, well, I'm like three-fourths of this zombie dust IPA in, and then I got my beer-a-thon beer. Which, by the way, Google beer-a-thon beer. I'm not sure what company makes it. Google it. Off-color brewing. So it. Off-color brewing.

So cute. Off-color brewing. So cute. Yeah, they have a bunch of fantastic art. I was showing you right before this happened. Yeah, I love it. The branding is on point. Yeah, off-color brewing.

It's fantastic. And they're beer-a-thon beer. So the IPA I'm drinking, it's just, you know, one, two, three beer. It's one one 16 ounce beer so that's like a 6.4 or something right so you get a little above but the beerathon it sets you right yeah and then the beerathon beer is a 16 ounce 2.6 so it's like you know it's pretty low but it keeps it keeps the buzz going right and it's extra fancy you know, it's pretty low, but it keeps it. It keeps the buzz going.

Right. And it's extra fancy light beer with watermelon and salt. It's got my electrolytes. Hmm. What's the, what's the, what's the flavor profile on watermelon salt beer? It's a little weird, but you get used to it. I was about to say that's either going to be delicious or terrifying. You get used to it.

Like at first you're kind of like, and then you're like yeah and then it might also be the alcohol just making you like it more but i don't know maybe maybe like i'm uh i mainly like beer and wine i don't like hard alcohol really it's you know i like my stand like i want to drink a lot of something like to me when you have like hard alcohol you get like a little bit and you're like sipping on it or whatever. I just, I don't like that. I prefer like a giant glass of just like beer or, you know, you get your wine and then that's it. Gotcha. Yeah. I mean, I don't, I'm not like a big, well, that's a lie. I want to say I'm not a big drinker, but I'm not a big casual drinker. You put me at an event like the last week and this last three days. Oh, I'm drinking.

But any other time I'm not at home drinking. I have a lot of people keep gifting me liquor. So I have a cabinet filled with it. I don't drink it. It just sits there. And the thought process is that eventually some will come over and drink it for me or I'll have a party and people will drink it. But it just sits there, which I guess might be good because maybe it means it ages or something.

I don't know, dude, but I have a lot of booze. I also have a lot of tequila for some reason, and I guess it's because I keep saying I love tequila, which I do, but I'm not going to sit there and drink it just on my own, right? Yeah. So I don't know. I remember, was it PAX South?

We had the Overwatch tequila thing. Oh, my God. That was like back when it Overwatch launched. It was like 2015, 2016. Yeah, that was a while ago. And I remember we were like, they're like, we're going to give you guys some fancy tequila. It was like probably like 70 to like $150 tequilas or something.

And they're like giving us shots. And then the other table wasn't drinking theirs because they're like, we're e-sports players and we can't drink or we don't. And we were like, yo, bring them over here. That's because they were like, we bought out the bar tonight and we already spent the money.

So someone has to drink this. And we were like, we'll do it for you. Like, listen, if you're putting like $120 tequila shots in front of me, I'm going to drink it. That shit's like for $120. My God. I'll never be able to. This is like I went to. It might have been a PAX or it might have been MAGFest or something.

And like random dude at the bar was like, hey, man, can I get you a drink? And it's like, hell yeah. It's like, I'm going to buy you a shot of whiskey. I was like, all right, not a real big whiskey guy and he's like no you're gonna love this it was some type of very famous i don't know what kind of whiskey it was but something where it was almost 200 dollars uh i don't know what would you call a snifter so whatever the hell i have no idea not a shot of whiskey but like in a little glass yeah i was like i don't deserve this i'd never order this but you're damn right i'm gonna drink it that's the thing with whiskeys like the only time i've ever had whiskey is when someone

else buys it and they're like yo you gotta try i think at coxconn there's some probably jolly old english person and they're like, Cox and Crandor and everyone I brought. They bought like $200 whiskey or something. And then I was like, well, I gotta try it. And I remember that it tasted like pure barrel. And you know what? I love it. Because I love

barrel tasting stuff. You and your tannins and barrels. Tannins and barrels. That's what I'm all about. That should be your autobiography. Tannins and barrels, tannins and barrels. That's what I'm all about. So that should be your autobiography. Tannins and barrels. So that was that time. Then we had this one of our friends was visiting and he was like really in the whiskey. He's like, I'll try, you know, I'll show you guys some good whiskey.

And he bought us like it was like an $80 like Japanese peat moss whiskey, like just crazy shit. And I was like, dude, it's like peat moss. I kind of love alcohol that tastes like something weird. Yeah. Or is, is weird.

The more weird alcohol and boozy stuff you can get me the better. Maybe that's cause deep down I'm like one of those mead guys was like, it's made of honey. It's like that kind of thing. Yeah. Where if you tell me – like when I was in London, God, like three months ago or whatever it was, we went to this pub and they had that bison grass vodka that's from Poland. Oh, yeah. And I was like, yo, this is great. Do you have any apple juice?

And they were like, I think we do. And I was like, well, you mix the bison grass vodka with the apple juice. And everyone there was like, what? Except for one Polish lady who was like, are you from Poland? And I was like, no, I just have been there. And it's like the way to drink it. And everyone there was like, what do you mean? It's like, trust me, order it yourself.

It tastes like apple pie. And that's the messed up thing is it tastes like apple pie and will kill you. It will kill you. It will get you so drunk. Yeah, I don't do those. Oh, it's dangerous. And I love it. Yeah, no, I don't. I don't like those.

If they don't taste like alcohol, I don't like that. Yeah, no, I need. The problem that I have is I want my alcohol to taste i don't know not like rubbing alcohol like i don't i'm not a big vodka vodka person right even though i found out recently my mom is my mom was like i love vodka just straight and i was like what like yeah if you add anything to it it ruins the flavor and i was like i did not know this about you damn yeah i didn't i wouldn't take her for that right that's blew my mind and because i always think back to the story of that time dodger and i went out with my mom and we were at this restaurant and we all ordered drinks and dodger and i ordered these two like you

know whatever drinks yeah mom was like vodka ice we were like whoa what yeah I thought it was just like a funny one time thing that's her vibe I guess which you learn something new all the time yeah well that's like my dad except Jack Daniels on the rocks my parents only order like Jack Daniels on the rocks and that's like their go to thing like constantly

my dad's like I'm not an alcoholic I just have like one two jacks one two three beer That's like their go-to thing. Like constantly. My dad's like, I'm not an alcoholic. I just have like one, two jacks. One, two, three, four beer. I'm just like, listen, I'm not judging you. All right. I'm trying to remember what my dad, I think my dad will have me like a Corona. One single Corona.

And then he'll say he doesn't drink and then he'll ask for sips of my drinks oh he's that guy yeah he'll be like i want corona he'll drink that and be like that's enough for me just water and he'll drink his water and then i'll be like hey can i have a sip of that yeah all right okay and then every time without fail this is not even a joke it happens every time i'll tell him dad this is you know a sangria It happens every time. I'll tell him, dad, this is, you know, a sangria or a Moscow mule or some sort of like smashed on a mint thing or some weird drink. And I'm like,

you're not going to like it. And he'll take a sip. He's like, you're right. I don't like that every single time without fail there. I don't know what he, that man likes to this day. I don't know what he likes that man likes to this day. I don't know what he likes.

Yeah. It's, uh, it's weird how different, uh, I don't know. I guess it's not different. Everybody has different tastes and everything, but your dad's essentially the guy where like somebody orders like fast food and they get fries. Like you want anything like, nah, I don't want any. And then you're eating like, can I have some of your fries? Oh no.

My dad's worse than that he is for years of my life growing up we would i don't know as a family we either like go get something not healthy you know like just food you know all right but my dad would eat it and then be like why ate it so you guys wouldn't because i don't want you to like you know eat too much of that or get sick or whatever so like i ate it so you guys wouldn't? Cause I don't want you to like, you know, eat too much of that or get sick or whatever. So like I ate it for you. Or if we had cookies in the cupboard, he'd eat the cookies and then be like, yeah,

well, you know, I know you guys are watching your weight. So I like want to make sure that you didn't eat them. Like that's what he would do. Just finding the excuses to do the thing. Just eat it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. We'd catch him in the kitchen at night. He's like, I was just making sure they wouldn't be here tomorrow. So you guys would eat them. You know? I'm like, what are you doing dude uh that's i uh he will proudly be like

oh look i was looking out for you we're like shut up that's uh i'm trying to think what oh my god every time we have like a like family outing there's always like the they my parents will just bring like the various alcohols they have like the jagdanyls for themselves then they're like we know you like wine so we bought you this red wine and I'm like all right and usually you know what they've gotten better at first I was listen, I'm a wine douche, all right? If there's one thing. I'm aware. I've had many wines.

One of the things TB always used to love was hearing me read off wines. But now, I think if TB heard me today, he'd be impressed. I've learned quite a bit about the wine. Everyone has to start somewhere. I've always said that about you is even though you once pronounced it cabinet sovereign everyone starts somewhere yeah and i very much believe that that was your entrance into the world and now you are a master of wine i go to you for tips i've had a lot of wine all right here's the thing it's like I if I could only drink

like really bad cheap wine I don't think I'd drink wine anymore like I I live for the like wine experience like if you're if you're going for like

the wine with the kangaroo on it that shit's just like grape juice with alcohol and listen I'm not judging you alright if you just want to get drunk off grape juice with alcohol

in it go for it but I don't you mean you mean sangria no the kangaroo wine you know i know what you mean but like it's roughly the same thing it's like you know 40 year old mom vibes which by the way is where i'm at i'm not gonna lie and that's fine like yeah again i'm not judging it's uh my thing is like you can usually tell. OK, here's the let me give you the wine spectrum. OK, you got zero to like ten dollars is like the Wild West. You can get grape juice with alcohol. You might find like a diamond in the rough. It's crazy.

Once you get to like the eleven to twenty dollar range, you can find some like pretty solid wines. But you get like a you like OK wines mixed in there, too. Once you get like twenty to 40 is like my favorite that's like the you can get some some pretty good wines get different flavor profile stuff once you get above 40 unless you're like a somalia or whatever it just starts tasting the same except there's like a couple wines where i've i've had like the the stag's Leap, which I mentioned one time here. I think I drank it on stream because it was like something special happened

and I bought it. I don't normally buy that. It's probably during a Nick Cage movie. No, it had to be something. That's like a $65 wine. No, Nick Cage is a $65 wine, man. That's true, maybe. That's like probably my favorite wine.

The Stag's Leap Cabernet. Fantastic. Unbelievable. I can't wait for people to tell us went out and bought it crendor has no taste in wine i was i would argue with them put me on the podium all right you know i've had some you know but you know that's like a you have your like special occasion wine or like the prisoner red another great one. Uh, but like usually 20 bucks, you'll get a pretty solid one, but that's why there's no reason to go.

You know, like if you go to the grocery store, if you go to your booze store where I don't know, half the country doesn't have alcohol and grocery stores, but whatever the case may be, you're going to see wines that are like a hundred dollars. Don't buy that shit. Don't fall for that. It's mostly gimmick. Yeah. It's like even somebody like me that drinks a lot of wine like once you hit that point

you're just like unless it's a crazy wine you can't really taste that you can get a solid bottle for 20 any day of the week yeah yeah yeah it's uh so yeah there there's a few that i really like but overall i just i don't. I like trying crazy wine. It's like the time I went to the fancy wine place near me. In fact, I should take you there. Is it the same place we were before where we got the flights? That was a different one. That was fun.

This is like, you'll love this place. It's like in a forest. It's like in a small town forest area. You'll be like, oh shit, it's great. And it's like, it's a fence. They give you like oh shit it's great and it's like it's a they give you like charcuterie oh okay i'm in now he sold me the last time we were there they were like we've had this like crazy wine it's like grown in volcano soil and i remember drinking i was like dude it actually does taste like like volcano it was wild i need to get you to come to la so i can get alex to take

you to go drink orange wine orange wine orange like oranges orange wine it will trip you out it's delicious but it's one of those things we're like why how who what was the reason what are we doing oh yeah that man is a trip when it comes to weird wines oh man that's what i'm all about i love that's what i'm saying yeah the best part was at this wine place they had a thing going and they were like if you guess this wine we'll give it to you for free but if not you gotta pay for it and i was like all, let's go. And they brought it out. And then they're like, all right, it's a wine on the menu.

Let us know what type it is. And I was looking and I was like, if I had to guess, I'd say it's a Napa Valley Cabernet. But I was like, they wouldn't do that. Like, they wouldn't just give me that. It's got to be some crazy one. And I guessed some crazy one. And they were like, it's a Napa Valley Cabernet.

And I was like, I played myself. I could have got the free wine, but I, I overthought it. Yeah. So, uh, but yeah, I only buy like a bottle of wine like once a week.

Cause you know, it's expensive, but otherwise I just have my beer. You're not going to sit there and hopefully not drink the whole bottle in an evening. You know what I mean? No, we usually,

well, me and toaster woman, we'll like split it. So we have like half a bottle each once a week. Yeah. You pour it in. We have the decanter. Ooh.

So you pour it in there. It aerates. Fantastic. You got to let it breathe a bit. Oxidize. Open up. You know? I'm a big fan of like decanters and various things,

especially the ones that look cool. You know what I mean? I'm a big fan of, like, cantors and various things, especially the ones that, like, look cool. You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm all about the style. Yeah. So, yeah, otherwise, I just like my beer. You know, I'm not going, like, crazy with beer, but, you know, a beer is, like, your standard.

You get a lot of the beverage, right? You fill up a whole glass, and you just, you know, you drink that, and you're good. See, I'm like you with wines, but with beer. So for me, like normal everyday beer doesn't cut it for me. Right. I need the weird beers. I need a beer that's made from cherries for some damn reason.

Or I need the beer that is like, like today, a great example. So I went to this final fantasy event saw our our dear pal kristen there we hung out for a while yeah and they had you know drink tickets and things so i had a bunch of tickets people kept giving me tickets and i was like well well i didn't drive but i took the the old lift so i'm good and went and uh went up to the guy and was like, all right, what do you got? What do you got, man? And he was showing me all these different drinks.

And then he had this one beer that was, oh, I don't know. It was, it was Nanjara? Whatever it was, it was orange. It was orange flavor, but with mangoes in it and stuff. And to say it was a beer would be a lie. It had, it was like a smoothie. I don't know what this thing was, dude. It was wild.

And I loved it. I might've had a bit too much. And also because I was doing a bunch of stuff not had a chance to eat so it was it wasn't until the very end that I found a chicken sandwich and literally just moments before the stream ate it and so it was you know

it was a treat but yeah I zoomed in on that where I was like I don't know what this is I don't know why I would drink it but but it isn't, you know, like a Budweiser or even a Modelo. Like, I love Modelo, but I want something crazy. Like, mess me up. I can get any of that at the store at any point in time. If I'm somewhere, if I'm out and I'm at a restaurant or something and there's a list of beers, I want the beer that's crazy.

Like, there was this place. I think it closed down during COVID. There's this one place where they had all these beers, but one of them was a barrel-aged beer, which to me makes no sense. I was like, how does that even work? But okay, delicious, amazing.

It wasn't a stout though. Oh, interesting. Yeah, which is, I don't remember what it was, but again, I couldn't even look because that place closed down. But that was great. You is, yeah, I don't, I remember what it was, but again, I couldn't even look because that place closed down, but, um, that was great. Like, you know, I'll do that.

But the problem is, is I operate with a sort of duality where I'll go out and I know I'm going to get a second drink. So I'll just order two up front and it's always going to be a beer. And then what might be the most girly drink on the menu? Yeah. It'll be like the darkest, most alcoholic beer and then some pink drink. And I'm like, yeah, I'm feeling good. And I don't know why.

It's just how I operate. I mean, I get it. It's, you know, you just want the fun taste, right? You want to taste like candy or something. Yeah, yeah. I like the little sweetness of the one drink mixed with what is obviously the hard, messed up levels of alcohol. But like 9% of the other one, I'm like, yeah, let's go. My thing is like, I love IPAs now. It's weird because like you acquire the taste.

Like you really do. It's kind of like coffee. It's just like wine or coffee or whatever. Yeah. And it's, I remember I tried this ipa years ago it was called three floyds which i love three floyds great brewing it's from indiana uh they had three floyds alpha king it's got a troll on it all right that all checks out yeah and i tried it and i was like like it tasted like it was bad to me you know i mean like a beer went sour bad and then i tried it that was like years ago so i was like you know what i've had a lot of ipa since then i'm gonna try it again and i tried it again i was like

it's pretty good like it was night and day Like it was really weird how your body almost like adapts to the taste or gets used to it. Meanwhile. Yeah. Yeah. If I have like Bud Light or something, I can drink it, but like I don't enjoy it. What sucks about Bud Light or any of the light beers is that it's basically water, but skunk water. And so you're kind of like, if I want to drink water,

I just drink water like this. Yeah. It'll get me drunk, but I don't, I don't like the taste of this of what I'm drinking, but I guess it'll get the job done. Meanwhile, you know,

I could get a beer that is a bit more hoppy and be like, Oh, okay. This is a taste. I'm, I'm experiencing things here. That's my thing is I just, I like the taste of different beers and stuff.

Like if I'm going to, like, I don't want to just get drunk, you know, like I, I enjoy the experience of it. And so, yeah,

no, I would say, I think like at a certain point you grow out of time to get wasted. You know what I mean? You're over it. And a lot of the beers, especially here in the States, exist to be drunken quickly and just get you wasted. Or to have sort of a hot summer day vibe. In which case, if I'm going to do a hot summer day, I'm just going to get Tecate or something.

Like some sort of Mexican beer. For some reason, those always hit the spot on a hot summer day vibe in which case if i'm gonna do a hot summer day i'm just gonna get like tecate or something like some sort of mexican beer you know for some reason those always hit the spot on a hot summer day yeah but most i'm not gonna get like milwaukee's best i'm not 21 you know what i mean yeah you have in mind yeah i don't know it's like sometimes i'll go with like uh one of my friends and they'll just be like oh yeah i gotta get like miller light or like they get the the pbr and i'm just like i just that's not for me yeah it just tastes like bud light for example it literally tastes like gumball water it tastes like someone took 80 gumballs soaked them in water for a week and then put some alcohol in it i I'm like, Oh yeah. But again, it comes down to what your objective is, right?

If I wanted to get drunk quick and not feel like I ate a loaf of bread, I'd probably drink a bunch of Bud Light. But the point is, is I'm there to have one drink, maybe two and be like, wow, what a unique flavor. Well,

Oh, this goes well with my hamburger. You know what I mean? Like it's, that's it. And I'm going to go home and like live the rest of my life because yeah, I don't know if it's just aging or I just ignored it before when I was younger, but if I have too many drinks, I just, I don't get like, wow, I'm crazy.

I get tired. Yeah. I've always been like that, but I've always, I've always been old. So it kind of checks out. It's true. That is true yeah uh oh my god i forgot this i just had flashback memories i was at the store the other day buying my like my wine for the weekend uh and a beer for the day and this old because i wasn't gonna

drink the wine yet i was like saving it i'd be, of course. I'd be like, yeah, that'd be stupid. So I was like, I just want my, you know, I want my tall boy, my pint for the night. You know, I'm good with that. I just like getting my buzz. And so this old man behind me, definite alcoholic, like the dude was blasted. It was like 7 p.m.

He was slur. I was like walking up. There was like a line, and he's like, you can go in front of me. And I was like, all right, thanks. And I walk in front and then he's like, yeah. And then another person comes. He's like, you can go in front of me. And they're like, no, it's fine.

You can go. And he's like, no, I got a big order coming in. And we're like, all right. They're like, okay. So then, I get up to check out, and the person behind me checks out, and this guy's standing behind us. And

I was like, um, yeah, I'm buying that and that. And then the other person's like, oh, hey, I want to use my rewards points. And he goes, rewards points? We'll bring out the bell! Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding! And he said ding said ding i swear to god like 20 times and everybody just looked over like what the fuck is this guy like

it was and he was just he was loving it like he was in his own world i he i don't know how much he had to drink but he was so anyway he gets up to the counter, right, and he's like, all right, where's, uh, where's Rick at, and they're like, he's like, oh, uh, we'll get Rick, and he's like, yeah, he knows what I want, and then Rick comes over, and he's like, oh, hey, and he's like, Rick, I'm gonna need a case of this stuff, and he's like, do you want bottles or cans, he cans he's like bottles i don't drink that can shit and uh by that point i checked out and i left i i'm sure this gives away too much the game for me to everyone listening but that dude is the same reason why I go to parties late because I really enjoy being around very, very drunk people who don't realize how absolutely wasted they are. And I am sober. And so they think I'm just as drunk as them.

And I just get to bask in how absolutely crazy they are. And frankly, I love it. He's also one of those guys who are like, he's probably funny to be around for a little bit or like at a party or something, but I would not want to live with that person. Oh, yeah, yeah. I mean, yeah, that guy is probably a mess to live with. Oh, yeah, 100%.

But, oh, yeah, at a party, I would love to hang out with that dude. I bet he's wild. I remember it was one of my friend's barbecues last year. There's some guy guy he's like 50 and he was drinking his i don't know i think they had coors light or something and then someone's like how many coors lights you had you're getting a little crazy and he's like i'm not gonna lie i've had four coors lights but i took an edible and it's fucking hidden

so that was fun. Yeah, there's your problem, my man. Don't do that. Yeah. So really, the moral of the story here is if you're going to drink, just, you know, get something you like. Drink responsibly.

Oh, yeah. And have good tasting alcohol because the cheap alcohol is trash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not even going to lie. Like, when my parents will buy, like, the garbage, this is why I say I'm a wine douche. Like, I'll buy it. They'll be like, oh, we got Spamanti or whatever the shit that one.

And I swear to God, I drank it and I spit it out. Like, I just, I can't, I don't like it. And I get that I'm, like, douchey about it. But, like, I drink't, I don't like it. And I get that I'm like douchey about it, but like I drink it and I'm just like, I would rather drink water at that point. Like, I'm not even kidding. I love this part of your life. I love that you have become wine douche. And I love that you're like, I'd rather drink water than buy that foul beverage. And then I put my monocle on and I walk out.

Yes, you and the other people at the lodge laugh, twirl your mustaches and put on your like explorer's hats. And I'm like, time to go, chaps. Get my croquet mallets. You ride off on ostriches. Oh my God, ostrich croquet come on now that sounds great living the dream by the way before we get before we move on from alcohol i want to say we were at a mexican restaurant and it was great love this place right. And the waiter legit forgot about us.

Okay. Now, one time we were forgot about at a Mexican restaurant and the woman brought our food out, the fajitas. And they were like cold. They weren't cold. They were like mild. Like, you know how normally they bring it out and it's all sizzling and smoking and it's like. Yeah. She was like, oh, sometimes they just come out like this.

And I was like, no, they don't. Like, I would have rather she just came out and been like, hey, sorry, I forgot to get it. I'd be like, oh, hey, it's all right, dude. Yeah, we'll re-sizzle that shit for you. No, come on. But she was like, oh, yeah, sorry. And we were just like, okay.

But this guy, this guy was fantastic. So he forgot about us. He was working the tables. He, listen, he had a big table. I get it. Right. He's got a big tip coming in, but he realized he forgot about us. And he came back because we wanted like another margarita and we're like, all right, you know, we'll wait. And then we were like, all right, do we even get another margarita at this ready to go? And he was like, oh boy. And he came back and he gave us free tequila shots. And he was like, yo, these are on me.

And we were like, nice. I tipped him 30%. I was like, that dude deserves it. I see your story and I raise you. When we were in London, we all went out to eat at,

uh, this, you know, it was like a, whatever restaurant we decided to go see John wick that night. Cause it had just come out. We were like, we got to go see John wick dude.

And so we all went to go eat at this restaurant that was near the theater. And at the beginning of the night, we had this waitress. She came over, took our order. Everything was fine. The food doesn't come out.

We're waiting. We're waiting. We're waiting. Finally, some dude brings us our food. We're like, oh, we're still waiting on our drinks. And he's like, oh, damn. Okay, yeah, I'll go get those for you. He brings the drinks.

And now we have this waiter. I was like, what happened to our waitress? Where'd she go? Maybe 25 minutes into actually eating and sitting there and talking, across the street through the window of this restaurant, I see our waitress come out of a 7-Eleven with a bag of snacks and stuff. I was like, wait, what just happened? She just left us.

She took our order, then left us. Did she come back? No, we never saw her again. I don't know what happened. I don't know if she got off. I don't know why they would have had her come take an order. I don't know what was going on, but she was across the street with a bag of snacks,

eating like some sort of candy bar, walking out. Oh, couldn't believe it. I was like, wait, what, what just happened here?

And yeah. And she never returned. She never came back. I don't know if she quit. I don't know what happened. Man. Imagine if she quit on the job, like that table was the last straw

they just couldn't handle it yeah i i don't know maybe i think we all everyone was ordering burgers except alex ordered some weird lamb dish that sounds like alex yeah of course and she had to come back and say we're out of the lamb. Do you want something else? And Alex was like, oh, I don't know. Let me look at the menu. And then she left. She disappeared. I don't know what happened. Oh, my God.

That actually reminds me. Okay. Our waitress didn't leave. But last week, in fact, last week I was golfing with my friend. And then afterwards, we went to a restaurant. We were eating. And our waitress was like, oh, I'm getting off my shift. And we were like, oh, okay.

But it was completely normal. That's what reminded me of this story, right? Sure. But we look up at the TV because they got sports on. And they had professional pickleball. They had professional pickleball they had professional but here's the thing okay they had it was like the championships and they had some guy who i swear to god he takes pickleball more seriously than anybody i've ever seen in life he had like the sleeves on like you know how like in sports they were sleeves. The compression sleeves. Yeah.

He had compression sleeves on both arms and on both legs. And I was like this dude's pumping blood harder than like anyone I've ever seen. Dude it's the finals. Okay. He's gotta be fit and ready. They show the actual match it's just like normal pickleball. Like

you could have. It felt like I was just watching people like at the park. Like it felt like I was just watching people like at the park. Like nothing felt crazy about it. I was like, okay, whatever. I love the mental image of like a guy stretching and like jogging around a track and like doing exercises and like swinging and trying to like get ready. And then he goes out into the actual match and it's just really slow. It's like a normal, he wasn't even walking anywhere.

He was standing still. I didn't get it. Oh man. I love that pickleball is now in the like ethos of this show forever. I'll be like pickleball. Yeah. Pickleball. When it resurfaces again in like 20 years

after people forget about it in like two years. Yeah, we'll be the guys who are like, we remember. So I have three things I wrote down. All right. Okay. First one is kind of related to what we're talking about. It's animal branding.

All right. So like off-color brewing, it's got the mouse. Hold on, hold on, hold on. You mean branding things with animals, not the act of branding an animal. Yeah, not like how they brand a cow with a hot thing, right? Right, okay, all right, okay. I just want to make sure. I was like, wait a minute, what?

Because like obviously the off-color brewing thing, right? It's got like animals, there's a mouse running, there's like a little porcupine holding a glass of wine, like hooray. And I swear to God, if it didn't have this branding i probably wouldn't have bought it i wouldn't like it nearly as much as i do because like the little mouse is so cute all the different animals very cute and it's wrapped around on the can it looks very yeah oh yeah yeah and so i noticed that with other things like there was a hot chocolate in the store and one of them had a bear with a candy cane and the other one was just like hot chocolate. And I was like, well, obviously I'm going to buy the bear with the candy cane.

Right. And so I just started noticing that. And I even made a TikTok about it on the old TikTok. And then I was like, why wouldn't I feel like everybody should just start marketing with animals? It just makes the most sense. Yeah, but I don't know. Not all animals are cute. That's true.

You know what I mean? There's some animals that if you marketed with it, I'd be like, I'm not going to buy that. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, that's true. But plus, if everybody did it it would lose some of its you know it would you're right if everyone but i think also because for example the beer you're talking about it's the art style i don't know what it is but to me it says 1990s French author. Children's book.

Yeah. Like, you know, it'd be like Madeline and the little tiny mouse. It has that vibe. It really does have that vibe, yeah. It's its own thing. So I get it. It's like the same with the teas. That's what I made the TikTok about. The teas, right?

You commented on it. I saw it. The, what are they called? It's the teas, right? You commented on it. I saw it. What are they called? It's a really common, it's like celestial tea? I know what you're talking about, though. Yeah. Hell if I remember. Hold on.

Common tea. It's, hold on. It's got to pop up if I type in common tea, right? Common tea brands. Hold on. Common tea brands. Here we go. It's, uh... No, not Lipton. Not Tazo. Okay. Come on. It's got...

Oh, wait. There it is. It is Celestial. Celestial tea. They got, like, the bear and a nightcap. Yes! Yeah, yeah. All the teas that are designed to make you fall asleep. Yes. Yeah, they got those. They got other ones. They got one where, like, peppermints are rolling down a river. They got some crazy shit, dude.

I don't understand how those peppermints are melting in that river. Like, they got some magic or something. But yeah, those. Animal branding. Anyway. Okay, yeah. We're moving on to number two.

So speaking of TikTok, I was browsing TikTok on my algorithm, which I love. I've shaped my algorithm into an unbelievable algorithm. And I got this guy that reviews frozen pizza. And he sounds like Kevin from The Office. Like it's crazy. And so I was listening and he was he sounds like kevin from the office like it's crazy and so i was listening i mean he was like today i will be reviewing the frozen pizza from red baron the frozen pizza from the sicilian

pizza company or whatever the shit they're called and then the frozen pizza from someone else and then he reviews them all and he gave him like an 8.5 and eight and a 7.5. And so this man reviewing pizza on TikTok inspired me to go buy a mini frozen pizza and try it. And it's the was it? It was the screaming Sicilian. But the way he says it, he's like, it's the screaming Sicilian. Why do I? Is that the one that has the big mouth on it?

Yes. With the mustache. Yes. I know. I've big mouth on it? Yes, with the mustache. Yes, I know. I've had that before. It's like all right. I never had it. I was excited. I tried it, and it tastes very okay.

It's like your standard cafeteria pizza. Here's the thing. cafeteria pizza here's the thing you are bringing this up and i uh for some reason know this person i don't know why i don't know how but i watched a review and it might be the exact same person and it was for a rouse r-a-o apostrophe Pizza. And the review was like, it's the best pizza that you can get for home because it looks exactly like it looks on the box. And I took a screenshot of it because I was like, I need to remember this.

I want to try it. And apparently it's only available at like certain Places and all of them are the more high-end Like the more high-end stores. I'm like alright. Oh, maybe if I go there. I'll get it, but yeah, I took a screenshot It's literally on my phone, and I just brought it up. I'm looking at it right now. Here's the thing it looks exactly like the box Here's the thing. I just looked looked it up it says it's a target well there you go maybe i'm wrong at least here in la here in la it is not anywhere that i can find that's just like 13 though my god well there you go see 13 for a mini pizza i mean i'd try it

yeah but here's the problem is is that if you're gonna get a pizza for 13 bucks just go to like your local hole in the wall pizza place yeah and just get that like a freshly made pizza that a guy made and his name was like gazpacho and he made you a pizza and it's you know it's gonna be better than anything you get in in the microwave or in the oven that's for sure yeah. Yeah. I don't know. This is more like, but now I want to try this. I might just try this for the sake of it at this point and then review it next week

or come back with a report, if I remember. But I'll remember if I write it down. If I don't write it down, it may as well have never happened. I mean, that's why I took a photo of it. That's my write it down. I will take a photo of it. What's my write it down. I will take a photo of it.

What I do is I usually open it in a tab, and then I leave that tab there, and that reminds me. You know what I mean? I can't do that. I have to, because if I leave it open, I'll just forget. What do you mean?

I suck. I'm terrible. I have problems seriously undiagnosed add but i well how many tabs do you have open i feel like i asked you this before uh i have no tabs i close my shit down all the time what yeah i have three different browser windows open with multiple tabs in each that's too much bro that's so so much well like okay i have my streamer tab which has all my twitch stuff it's got my like youtube things open my patreon my other stuff my moobot then i and it's got a couple other things then i have my uh my other tab that has music and stuff for when

i'm streaming it's got my kaizo iron man maps and then my magic the gathering draft sim rankings as well as lilith diablo statues uh not like actual real life ones like ones you find in the game sure uh and then my other one just has like a bunch of random youtube shit or like twitch things or like reddit pictures and stuff like the slan mage priest that i thought looked cool and i wanted to copy it a bit for what I'm, so I'm similar. Like I, I have, let me see if I can open this up. I have so many saved links. Like I have a lot of saved links.

Right. But I save them so I don't have to keep anything open. So I'm similar to you, but I don't like the clutter, which I guess goes to my real life as well. You know what I mean? Yeah, I get it. That makes sense. Yeah. Or on my phone.

Most of the photos on my phone are of things like I was in the car and a song came on. I was like, I need to remember that song. So I took a photo of this, of the car, the song that was playing at the time. So I can go home and be like, oh yeah, that song I was listening to. But you're going to forget it anyway. No, I took a photo. But you said you forgot about the pizza. No, I took a photo of the pizza.

So I'd remember the pizza. But you forgot about it until now. Well, like that's not the point, so I'd remember the pizza. But you forgot about it until now. Well, like, that's not the point, though. But it is the point, because you forgot about it. The point is because you maybe remember. But you maybe remember, so then I went to my phone and I was like, oh, I have it on there. Well, yeah, but... Well, then I had it, so like, I'm good.

You helped me remember that I had it, so now I have it, and now I remember again. Will I remember tomorrow. Probably not. But that's not the point. All right. I mean, I get it and I don't get it at the same time. All right. So, yeah.

So that was that. That was TikTok Pizza Man. And finally, there was the I wrote down the Nick Cage thing because Nick Cage showed up at the whatever E3. It's not E3, but it may as well be. Summer Game Fest. Yeah. Right. Summer Game Fest.

And I realized that I would love Nick Cage just voicing everything. 100% agreed. I also love that he seems so into it. And even though I'm sure someone's going to tell me like, dude, that was all scripted. He made it seem like it wasn't. Yeah. That's what it's all about. Yeah.

He really, truly made me be like, man, I just, if I had a million dollars, I'd find a way to give it to him and be like, be in something of mine. I wanted to see what movies he was working on but it looks like the only 2023 nick cage movie is the dracula one yeah everything else is wait hold on there's another one nick cage is a cowboy time out what it's called the old way an old gunslinger this actually looks amazing an old gunslinger and his daughter

must face the consequences of his past when the son of a man he murdered years ago arrives to take his revenge I love that I think that's amazing I'm more blown away that I think I spoiled myself for

I got I went myself for I got I went on here to see his upcoming movie roles and it says The Flash Superman What? I don't know if I ruined that entire movie for me but it says

The Flash Superman uncredited I don't know if that's a lie or if I actually have a reason to go see The Flash Superman uncredited. I don't know if that's a lie or if I actually have a reason to go see The Flash movie now. That's 100% a reason, though. That would be so great. Yeah. And then he's in a movie called Sympathy for the Devil where his name is Passenger. Wait, his name is Passenger?

His name is The Passenger, and I don't know what this movie is. Oh, hold on. After being forced to drive a mysterious passenger at gunpoint, a man finds himself in a high-stakes game of cat and mouse where it becomes clear that not everything is as it seems. Huh. All right, sure. So is he going to be like the devil? Is that what this is? What is the vibe here? He's got to right. Sure. So is he going to be like the devil? Is that what this is?

What is the vibe here? He's got to be. Right. Oh, then he's in the retirement plan. The retirement plan? In the retirement plan, when Ashley and her younger, her young daughter, Sarah, get caught in a criminal enterprise that puts both their lives at risk,

she turns to the only person who could help, her estranged father, Matt, Nicholas Cage, currently living the life of a retired beach bum in the Cayman Islands. Hell yes. Did you see he's also in Butcher's Crossing? What is that? This was released last year.

A frontier epic about an Ivy League dropout as he travels to the Colorado wilderness where he joins a team of buffalo hunters on a journey that puts his life and sanity at risk based on the highly acclaimed novel by John Williams.

I assume not like musician guy John Williams. Yeah, I don't think so. But hold on. Look at this picture of him. Look at this. This is him as a Buffalo Hunter. Whoa.

Bald Nick Cage is not a look. I ever thought I'd see. Yeah. Crazy. I'm more interested in the fact that there's a movie called dream scenario. And it says, and I quote plot kept under wraps comedy horror movie. The cast is Nicholas cage, Michael Sarah, for some reason, Tim Meadows from like 90 Saturday night live horror comedy dream scenario.

That's that's okay. All right. Oh, yeah, it shows what the the surfer. Wait, he's got the surfer Lords of War and long legs. So the surfer is when a man returns to his beachside hometown in Australia. He is humiliated in front of his teenage son by a local gang of surfers who claim strict ownership over the secluded beach of his childhood. That's a Nick Cage movie, 100%. Yo, I'm here for it.

We have Lords of War. Inns Orlov, the world's most famous arms dealer, discovers that he has a son, Anton, who is trying to outdo his father by raising an army of mercenaries to fight in America's Middle Eastern conflicts, triggering a father-son rivalry. Again, another Cage classic. Wasn't Lord of War an actual movie about apparently a real...

So they made a sequel? I don't know. I never heard of it. Long Legs. FBI agent Lee Harker is assigned to an unsolved serial killer case that takes unexpected turns, revealing evidence of the occult. Harker discovers a personal connection to the killer and must stop him before he strikes again. And then finally, finally we have Arcadian. And then finally, finally, we have Arcadian, a survival action thriller about a father and his twin sons trying to survive ferocious creatures that attack the remote farmhouse. Now, that's a movie.

You know, that's going to be some crazy shit. Yeah, 100%. I am blown away by just the Nick Cage movies coming soon. Every time we look at these they're always the best 100 yeah like these just like that movie sounds phenomenal just you can you imagine nick cage in a farmhouse who's like we're farming corn you like the farm corn here and then he's i mean i can't now and they like go into their house he's's like, you got to calm down. There's sounds outside. And they're like,

who knows what crazy shit's going to be attacking their farmhouse. That's what I'm, I'm pumped for that. It could be anything. Aliens. I want you to do all Nick Cage previews from now on. It's like Nick Cage is in a fog. Who knows what crazy shit's going to be attacking that fog.

I mean, really. It just says ferocious creatures. It could be aliens. It could be anything, yeah. It could be like just random like jaguars and shit. It could be like alien buffaloes. It could be who knows, robots?

We'll have to find out. These robots keep attacking our farm stay low I love the idea where it's like a farm life story and snake cages family and for some reason robots but like it's not cool robots it's like the shitty robots that are like cardboard box spray paint silver they're like dad it's just cardboard cut out there's no you think that's what it is these

are dangerous now drink your dangerous robots stay inside kids gunning down these cardboard box robots oh my god that sounds amazing like that one was that one post apocalyptic movie we watch i remember i they all kind of blend together at some point yes yes all i remember from that movie is the mom just being like here's your piss drink and yeah where they're like it's lemonade he's like this is pee water yeah that was that's all i remember from that movie the entire time from that point. I'm not going to lie. The entire time from that point on, we were like, wait, so was it lemonade? Or is it because it's the post-apocalypse?

They just pissed in water and said it was lemonade. Like, with no answers, none. Yeah, and then, like, the world blows up and kids go to, like, heaven or some shit. I don't remember. No, that was the other one. That was the other movie. The other? Was it the other movie? I thought that was the other movie. The other... Was it the other movie?

I thought that was the same movie. Yes, the one movie you're talking about is the movie where, at the end, everyone just gets shot. Oh, wait. The other movie's the one where the world explodes. No, that was the one where you get shot, and then they, like, take the...

I don't fucking... It all doesn't matter. Yeah, yeah, it was all a piece of shit. Like you said. The one where it's the cop, and then his buddy's like, I'm gonna die, and they're like, you're not gonna die, and then that kid has to, like, yeah. And then there's the one where it's the cop. Like you said. The one where it's the cop, and then his buddy's like, I'm gonna die. And they're like, you're not gonna die. And then that kid has to, like, witness all this shit.

Yeah, and then he goes to Canada. The kid goes to Canada. Yeah. Yeah. That's that movie. No, that's not that movie. That movie's the one where the guy actually lives, and then the kid is fine. Because he's, like, part of the family or whatever.

What? Yeah. I... You don't remember that? You know what? I what yeah i you know remember that you know what i'm gonna let you know i don't remember any of this i don't know what you're talking about and there's the buddy cop and then there this kid that like got bullied and like punched someone is apparently the criminal even though he was just fighting back and then he has to go with the one that's the yeah that's the one where the criminals take over the bank yeah that's the bank one that's what i'm saying no no i thought you're talking about the one where the criminals take over the bank. Yeah, that's the bank one. That's what I'm saying. No, no, no.

I thought you were talking about the one where the woman in the post-apocalypse gives the lemonade to him. I was talking about that at first. The boy is also his son, but is also not his son. Look, man. Trying to explain this in any way makes no sense. And we're down a path that we can't come back from. That's true. My main point is that he's got some crazy ass movies

and I can't wait for more of them. Point taken. Yeah. In fact we need to do another Nick Cage movie night soon. Agreed. And I was looking through all the movies and the only one I haven't seen is Gone in 60 Seconds. You've never seen Gone in 60 Seconds? No. never seen Gone in 60 Seconds?

No. We need to watch it. We need to find it and watch that movie somehow. I've heard that's a good one. It's on Amazon. Is it? So we can watch it. Oh, my God.

We got to watch it. I didn't realize it's gone. Literally for the, like, let's ride. That scene is so silly. Oh, that's what it's from? I didn't realize that. And then after he does that, it goes,

wop, wop, wop, wop, wop, wop, wop, wop, wop, wop, wop, wop. All right, I'm in. It's amazing. I didn't even realize Angelina Jolie's in this movie. Oh, yeah. She and Nick Cage are love interests. Mm. Yes.

So it's very real life, you know. Oh, yeah. Very real. So yeah, that'll be fun. We can do that soon. Yes, and also, we're 55 minutes into this podcast. Oh, my God. All right.

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Oh boy. Traffic is insane. because it's America's number one meal kit. All right, Crabdolls, go to the traffic. Let's go to the Crabdolls. Let's drive down there. Oh, boy. Traffic is insane. It is getting to be summertime. There's traffic all over. I can't even move right now.

We're stuck in the chopper copter traffic. I'm backed up. We're trying to get this chopper copter. Chopper copter? Chopper, I don't know where I am. We're trying to get this thing moving, but it's not moving. And it's getting pretty hot up here. It's getting kind of sweaty, kind of sticky.

And I don't like it. Back to you. Thanks, Crendor. Now let's go over to Crendor at the weather desk. How's that weather? Weather time. We got a weather request for the German town of Fusen. Fusen? How do you spell Fusen?

F-U-M-L-A? F-U-S-E-N Since they will be there the week after the next episode for some nice outdoor barbecue and love some sunshine. I don't know if there is any nice restaurants around, but the thing this town is most famous for would be the castle Nusswadenstein,

which was the real-life castle that inspired Beauty and the Beast. I see it. It's the first thing that pops up. It's beautiful. It like is a when you think of castle, but not, you know, like the stone and not like a very British castle. But when you think like a European castle where some Lord lived and it's very fairytale-like, this is it. It looks like a fairytale.

Oh, wow. Yeah, I see that too. That's crazy. Yeah, it's beautiful. Well, the weather there, it's currently 73 degrees Fahrenheit. Plentiful sunshine. I think that's the first time I've ever seen that at weather.com. A high of 73 and currently it is, but that's later today. Currently it's 54. It's going to

warm up to that. 79% humidity, 29.98 inches of pressure, visibility, 10 miles, winds at three miles an hour, dew point 48, UV index one of 10, and a moon phase of waning crescent. 5.19 a.m. sunrise, 9.15 p.m. sunset. That's a lot of daylight. Checking out the old 10-day. You got your 72 on Tuesday, your Wednesday, 70, mostly sunny. Thursday, p.m. shower, 68. Friday, 66 showers.

Saturday, 68 scattered thunderstorms. Sunday, 74, mostly sunny. 68. Friday 66 showers. Saturday 68 scattered thunderstorms. Sunday 74 mostly sunny. Monday 79 partly cloudy. And Tuesday 80 with some PM thunderstorms. You know what? When we're looking at towns and we end up looking at food or whatever, we usually see places, we try to look for the five star

things, right? Right. But not often do we see a place where it has, I think it's like 4.9 or something like that, but also thousands of reviews, like over 3000 reviews. I don't know how long this place has been around,

but it looks like it's from the 12th century. I don't even know. Beam, Olive, Olive and Bauer, Olive and Bauer. I don't even see it. I just linked it to you.

Oh, yeah, okay. It looks like it is from... The decor looks like it is from the 12th century. It really does. Wow, yeah. Look at that. The food is all over the place. They got pizza.

They got brats. They got curry verse. They got the whole... They got desserts that They got the brats. They got curry verse. They got the whole, they got desserts that I've never seen before in my life. They got fish and like pancakes. They got all sorts of crap here. Oh my God. But then the beers,

I'm looking at these beers and I'm just like, Ooh, what is that? Okay. This one beer is red. I love a good red beer. I don't know what that means for the beer, but I like it. The bathroom.

I don't know. Look at this photo. How would you describe this to people? I love that someone took a photo of the bathroom. This looks like a Keebler elf bathroom. There's straight up moss on the wall.'s like straight up moss on the wall. Yeah, there's moss on the wall. It's like planks.

The sink is made out of like clay. It's like a trough sink. I was looking around because I saw a bunch of places and I was like, wow, that's a lot of stars. That's amazing. But this one has 3000 reviews. That's amazing. But this one has 3,000 reviews. That's not often you see 3,000. That's a lot of reviews.

Yeah. Most people don't leave reviews at places. So 3,000? That must have left an impression. Yeah. Oh. Well, we got the Bilbo kiosk. Sorry, the Bilbo Kiosk. Sorry, the Bilbo Kiosk?

Like, Lord of the... The Bilbo Kiosk am Lekfal. You can get bio-ice there. Damn, bio-ice, dude. Which looks like ice cream, but probably maybe it's organic. That's what that means? Organic ice cream? I have no idea.

Bilbo Spizen and the Getronka. Here's the thing. It's not Bilbo's and Baggins. It's literally Bil space Bo. B-O. The Bilbo kiosk.

It's like they got lamb beer. Here, look at that. That is lamb beer. Lou Marketer Lamb's Brow. I'm going to assume it's not lamb in there. Yeah, I don't think so. I was going to say this place looks really good because of all the, they have like a lot of cool looking ice creams and various like gelato things.

And then there's just one photo of what i assume is is some sort of like curryverse thing but it's just straight up two hot dogs like not even like gourmet looking they look like hot dogs out the package they really do i was like all right it's also crazy because like this is just a place by a giant river mountain area i imagine it's very touristy this is probably like when i was in haw in Hawaii with my parents and we were driving up in the middle of the mountains. There was a place everyone said to stop and it was an ice cream place.

That place was in the middle of nowhere. It was packed with people who were driving through but it was a cart in the middle of the jungle. And I was like, I guess they're smart. If you're up in the mountains and you have nowhere to go, that's a good restroom stop and then a good place to sell people stuff because what are they gonna do wait till they get to down the other side of the mountain no yeah no that's

no bio ice i still can't figure out what the bio because everything is listed with bio what does that mean my our dear german listeners what does that mean yeah What does that mean? Our dear German listeners, what does that mean? Yeah, what does that mean? I don't understand. I mean, bio here is like life, right? Like biology. That's what I was thinking. Maybe it's organic.

Yeah, I don't know. I got questions. Also, this is very South Germany. This is straight up Lichtenstein Germany. This is, we are like, I don't even, I, I'll be real. To the people of Lichtenstein, I'll be, I'll be, I'll be real with you. I was under the impression that that was not a real place. Because there's like Austria and then there's Switzerland and then

actually it's closer to Austria than Liechtenstein, I guess. Also, I found this place called Schiffwurfschaft Browery Bar and I clicked on that and I think it was like a soda?

It's got a mermaid on it? You know, what Germany's known for for it's many river mermaids not even but also this place looks like a something from the 12th century as well i guess when your country and you know i guess when you've been around a long time you're allowed to look like that if that was america poop like look at this rundown place yeah they were like the 1800s what is this you guys didn't upgrade your you didn't renovate come on like even the outside looks like it doesn't belong in this world oh my god so i looked it up schwarza eva uh their website is a bunch of like topless mermaids oh yes all right never mind i'm in charza eva is a lemonade from leck gold with organic quality okay now does it say bio quality no no bio quality so bio doesn't mean organic huh i well i don't know this is like an english

translation maybe so maybe that's why. Because then if I go here, it says Das Bio Erfenschwergen-Schwergen-Wergen. Like straight up, look at this. Look at that top line. I'm looking. Erfenschwergen-Schwergen-Schwergen. Das Bio Erfenschwergen-Schwergen. I appreciate you're trying to pronounce it because I'm not going to.

Yeah. That's got a happy sun. Mm-hmm. I mean, it's good branding. Yeah. So, yeah, that's the weather. All right. What's going on in sports?

Sports. Over in sports, we got the NBA Finals. The Nuggets up 3-1 on the Heat in the Finals. Looking like they're going to be taking that one. And in hockey, we also have the Vegas Golden Knights up 3-1. And the Florida Panthers looks like they're going to be taking that one. So unless there's some big collapses, looks like we know who's going to be winning. Over in the MLB, we got Tampa Bay Rays in first, the Minnesota

Twins in first, the Texas Rangers in first, the Atlanta Braves in first, the Pittsburgh Pirates still in first, surprisingly, and the Arizona Diamondbacks in first. Another surprise over there. So that is your Major League Baseball standings, and that is sports.

All right, what is our fact of the day? Fact of the day. Fact of the day. British military tanks are equipped to make tea i've heard this before somewhere i'm not sure why i know this but it's a fact i know which is surprising to me but yes that is both a real thing but also the most british shit i've ever heard it really is uh there's a boiling vessel inside so crews can make tea and coffee anytime including during battle how frightfully english there's a reason

why you work better in coffee shops wait what oh and then it just links to another article that's me so you can no matter if you're fighting or just chilling and you're in a British military tank, you have the ability to make tea or coffee. I very much enjoy that. And I don't know why the idea of a bunch of like British dudes firing from the tank, like, Oh, good show. Charles reload the artillery reload the tea cattle, if you will. Yes. Yes, yes. I don't know why in our scenario

it's like 70 year old men in this tank. Hey, I'll say when we were on that British train like six years ago, there was a man literally like Nigel Thornberry on there and he's like, oh, greetings ladies. I was like, dude, this is like I'm watching Nigel Thornberry on there and he's like oh! Greetings ladies!

I was like dude this is like I'm watching a TV show. He's not even joking when he says Nigel Thornberry it was almost identical like comically so like this dude shouldn't exist. He literally was like a couple of bottles of bubbly for everyone.

I was like oh my god he's saying words that are British. This is crazy. It's true. That's your fact of the day. All right. What is our big news story of the day? Big news story of the day.

What the heck is that? Wildlife officials stumped by mystery sea creature. Okay. An odd-looking sea creature swimming near a bridge in South Carolina has even wildlife officials looking for answers. Oh, I think I've seen this thing. Oh, but a TV meteorologist says he's already solved it. The viral footage shows something in the waters near Pauley's Island

with what looks like wings and even something resembling a beak, but it's not a bird. The Marine Resource Institute have no idea what it is as the institute shared the footage sent in by a viewer. The people in my office are mostly stumped, but we're not experts, an official with the South Carolina Department of Natural Resources said. Brad Panovich, the station's chief meteorologist, said on air that he solved it. At first, I thought it was a cuttlefish, he said,

but he believes it's a critter called a sea hare or sea slug. They can be pretty large, and they do swim in water like that. The only odd thing, they're not typically found in waters off South Carolina. It's more of a Florida and a West Coast thing, Panovich said, but he noted that there have been sightings as far as North Carolina

Wilmington. As waters get warmer, sea slugs seem to be moving farther north. So, yeah. Okay. I I would recommend anyone out there to go look at it. It's bizarre. Just go find it.

Go find it on the internet. Go get weeded out. Yeah. It's a mystery creature South Carolina. You'll find it. Yep. Well speaking of mystery creatures I don't know how that's a segue to the ending. Speaking of mystery creatures, it's a mystery how us creatures are still doing this after all these years and that our show. Hold on.

Let me verify this because I was told our show sold out. Yeah. However, after I was told that information, I got a ticket listing that said there were some tickets left. And I don't know if that's tickets for like you and me to like whatever. But if we can sell them, we'll sell them. Hell. Yeah. So we'll figure that out.

But for those of you who've been pestering me, yeah, we'll see what's going on with that. But technically, it's a sold-out show. So just a heads up to everyone who's going to be in Chicago in August. Can't wait to see y'all. But that's it for us. Crendor, I know the socials. Socials. We got YouTube.com slash Cox and Crendor podcast. That's where all these are uploaded. Hit the bell. Hit subscribe.

Hit the ding-ding like button. Yeehaw. Also, go to YouTube.com slash Cox and Crendor. All the animations over there. We're also on Spotify, iTunes, SoundCloud, everywhere except some places. Also, you can find us on our main stuff, YouTube.com, Jessica Cox, YouTube.com slash Crendor, Twitch, Jessica Cox, Twitch, Crendor, Facebook, Jessica Cox, Facebook, Crendor, Twitter, Jessica Cox, Twitter, Crendor, TikTok, Jessica Cox, TikTok, TikTok, Crendor, Instagram, Latourius Cox, Instagram, Crendor was taken, YouTube, Warhammer, Crendor, YouTube, Crenclips, YouTube, Coxclips,

and probably some other stuff I'm forgetting, but that's it. Okay, that is it for us. We'll see y'all next time, and as always, shake the rhino. To be continued. you