Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 389 - Too Many Holidays
Episode Date: June 19, 2023The boys are back and after a discussion about Father's Day, Crendor expresses his dislike of all the "stupid" holidays. This takes them down a rabbit hole which somehow ends with lobsters tasting wit...h their feet. Yep, it's another episode of Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://hellofresh.com/cox16 and use code cox16 for 16 free meals plus free shipping. Go to http://expressvpn.com/cox to get an extra three months of ExpressVPN free.
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Hello everybody, it's time for Ghost on Trend Dog.
Ghost on Trend Dog in the morning.
In the morning.
Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live. In 4-hour recording studio. Recording. Hello everybody, welcome to another episode of Cacks and Creddor in the morning!
I'm sorry, what was that?
Powering down?
What was that noise?
That was me jumping into the podcast.
Oh, right.
Do you have some sort of moon boot on?
What was the...
That's me jumping off the diving board
and landing
and then splash the podcast like water.
So you have some sort of like
Mario sound maker effect when you move around
is what you're saying.
I wish,
I wish I had some sort of way to,
yeah,
at least for a little bit.
It'd probably get tiring.
Yeah,
but it'd be nice.
It'd be nice to like everyone.
The problem is you couldn't sneak anywhere.
Yeah.
Cause every time he's like,
he crept around to go like,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop,
boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, boop, And you couldn't do that. That's what I'm saying.
It would get to a point where you're just, you'd probably lose your mind.
But I would like to have a theme when I walk down the street.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Like, like a cool theme.
That wasn't very cool.
Yeah, you know.
Like a cool theme.
Yeah. People look over like dang that guy's cool yeah well because the song the lyrics were cool cool cool cool cool so yeah who would sing that
song or would just be who it's me it would be me singing the song to myself awkwardly walking down
the street people be like I don't know if that
is cool.
I would be one of the people saying, I don't know if that is cool.
But it's like I said, I feel like half the time you're cool, half the time you're not
uncool, but you're not cool.
That's good enough for me.
I'll take it.
Yeah.
But me, it's even less.
I don't know.
You got like a cool vibe.
You're like a cool kid.
What makes me cool?
Don't ask me that.
I don't have answers.
All right.
I mean, you're making me on the spot here.
You're saying I'm a cool guy, but then you're like, you don't know anything about it.
You're saying I'm a cool guy, but then you're like, you don't know anything about it.
I'm sure someone listening right now has reasons, and those are good enough for me.
All right, who's somebody you think is really cool?
I don't think I know anyone that's cool, I'll be honest.
Look at the field we're in.
I don't know any cool people.
I mean, what about somebody you think is cool?
It doesn't even have to be somebody you personally know.
Just somebody you think is cool? Like, it doesn't even have to be somebody you personally know. Just somebody you think is cool.
I feel like the closest person to what I think cool is is Matthew McConaughey.
Okay, and what makes him cool?
If I could give you that answer, I would be cool.
I don't know.
I don't even know much about him personally.
Just something about that dude, I'm like, yeah, that dude's cool.
Maybe it's because he's high all the time. That might be part of it's because he's high all the time that might be part of it that might be it yeah that might be part of it i don't know i don't i think like you know what cool is but i don't think i could ever call
someone cool like i don't i work in a field of nerds i don't know that any of us qualify as cool
but maybe like there are levels of cool like a spectrum of cool but at the far end is matthew
mcconaughey and he's like all right all right all right you know what i mean yeah well i mean but maybe like there are levels of cool, like a spectrum of cool, but at the far end is Matthew McConaughey.
And he's like,
all right,
all right,
all right.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
Well,
I mean,
maybe the reason that the high people seem cool like that is because they're
just kind of,
they don't care,
right?
They're not stressed out.
They're not like,
Oh no,
what's going to happen?
They're just kind of like,
whatever,
man,
I guess,
I guess.
Yeah.
I feel like that's part of it.
Not caring is always cool, but sometimes caring is cool.
Yeah.
Caring can be cool.
Yeah.
So, like I said, I don't know.
I have no answers for you.
You put me on the spot.
I just know that you're cool, man.
I know you're cool.
You're saying it's a vibe.
Yeah.
It's like, listen to you. You're just like, you say it's's a vibe yeah it's like a fight listen to you you're like you
say it's like a vibe that's cool listen i'm just trying to figure out what makes things cool what
makes them not cool because then cool trying to figure out what make things cool not cool it is
in fact not cool so well yes we've uh but i've established i'm not cool so i don't care i think
you are cool well but you just said it makes me not, so I don't care. I think you are cool.
But you just said it makes me not cool, so I wouldn't be cool right now.
You're cool with like a K, dude.
What?
It was like an off-brand grocery store cool?
Yeah, you're like the royal crown of cool.
Like the Aldi's brand cool.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We don't have any baggers here.
You got to bag your own stuff.
You got to pay 25 cents for a cart.
Yeah, 100%. You're that kind of cool.
If you want your 25 cents back, you got to put that cart back.
You got to put your Twitch Prime in the slot,
and then you can be allowed into the grocery store.
You are that cool.
Yeah.
Yeah.
How's your week going?
Great.
It's going great.
Hey, happy Father's Day to the fathers out there.
My goodness.
Yesterday, went out with the parents to someplace way far south of the city.
I'm talking like an hour and a half south.
I'm going to let you know, it might be the most crendor place I've ever been.
Let me describe this to you.
So, we get on
the highway, stuck in traffic, you know
LA, whatever. We finally get
there. My mom's like, we're taking your
father to go eat at this very
very, um
it's not fancy, but
it's, I don't know
it's like farm to table
um, kind of like, the best way I could describe it when we're in the moment was, for some reason I feel like I'm in Florida.
I don't know why.
I couldn't explain it to you.
It was like a little Florida enclave.
Now, it could be that it's because there was a lot of old people there at the time.
That could do it, yes.
But it wasn't that, though.
There was something about the vibe where it didn't feel like California, even the foliage around the time. That could do it, yes. But it wasn't that, though. There was something about the vibe
where it didn't feel like California.
Even the foliage around the area
didn't feel like California.
The housing didn't feel like California.
It just didn't feel like it.
And so this restaurant is in one of those,
not a garden center,
but one of those giant nurseries
that's plants and different things.
And so in order to get it, you have to walk through all the different plants and all the different things they have set up.
Except this place was very hummingbird themed.
So there were a lot of planters and a lot of flowers that were like lure butterflies to your yard with this giant planter of like 50 different butterfly flowers, things like that.
It was beautiful.
Very nice.
We walked around in there for a little bit.
And then when you go to eat this restaurant,
it is apparently it takes a month and a half to get in.
So your mom was like planning this for a while.
Of course she was,
you know,
her,
she,
she planned this out way in advance.
We sit down and right away,
I guess every menu is different depending on the day.
So they keep switching it up.
Because again, it's farm to table kind of stuff.
Right.
So it's whatever the hell they have.
And most of the menu is things like the local pizza
or soup.
And you'd have to ask what the soup was, right?
Yeah.
And my dad was really feeling the soup.
He's like, I want soup.
I want soup.
And we get there and they're like,
today's soup is three bean chili soup with cheese and onions. And my dad was really feeling the soup. He's like, I want soup. I want soup. And we get there, and they're like, today's soup is three-bean chili soup with cheese and onions.
And my dad was like, I don't know if I want that on a hot summer day.
But my mom was like, so what is the pizza today?
And the pizza was, and I'm going to try and describe this the best I can.
It was a Sicilian-style pizza, but it had a pesto instead of like a red, you know, tomato sauce.
Yeah.
Pesto, prosciutto, some cheese that I can't remember what it was, a bunch of green that
I can't remember what the green was, and then peaches with a vinaigrette drizzle on top.
And you might say, what?
Listener, you might say, what?
I'm going to let you know.
This is one of those,
you know they have a chef who works there
because it hit all the angles.
It was sweet, sour, salty, spicy.
Like it had all the different flavor profiles in one bite.
It was great.
It was weird.
Delicious though.
Delicious. We got some. It was weird. Delicious, though. Delicious.
We got some little, like, tosta.
They called it a tostarito, and it was a shrimp tostarito.
It was a little tiny baby tostada with shrimp and, like, a ceviche on it.
That was good.
That's so good.
Yeah, and then my mom, dad, and I split a apple gorgonzola something salad that had a bunch of stuff in it and a sandwich that was like a steak sandwich kind of thing.
And that was very good.
And then we got some ice cream for dessert, and that was very good.
And the whole point was it was all fresh.
It was one of those places where it was incredibly good tasting, despite not being, you know, crazy.
It was just very simple ingredients and absolutely loved it.
Big fan.
It was the first time I saw my dad go out to dinner and be happy.
It was wild.
That man was thrilled.
He was like, that's really good.
I was like, oh, my God, does he like this?
And then he got a beer that he loved.
And I was like, wow wow i think we nailed this
like good job mom and then um yeah it was like a pretty good time but again one of the things that
i noticed was a lot of old people just a lot of old people and oh and also it was a weird crowd
a lot of people 70 plus and then a lot of people
covered in tattoos who were like in their 20s very very strange crowd that does sound about
right though yeah but i loved it thought it was really cool uh but again it had this vibe
that was so florida that sounds like a place i would like as well that's what i'm saying i was
like yeah this is a Crendor place.
Yeah, 100%. Especially because I'm a little bit of both of those.
I got the young 28-year-old being like, yeah, a little bit of hipster in you,
and then a little bit of the old person like, I just want simple food.
Price point-wise, relatively cheap.
Usually in LA, if my parents and I go out for a nice meal,
and we get drinks, and we might get a dessert or something,
we're hitting $200.
But this place, nowhere close to that.
Nowhere even near it.
And we got roughly the same amount of food.
I got a drink that was called a Voodoo Child,
and it was rum, pineapple juice, hibiscus, and something else.
Oh, dang.
My oh my.
Loved it.
Big fan.
My dad was like, I'm not going to like that.
I don't want to taste it.
And then five minutes later, let me have a taste of that, which happens all the time.
Every time we go out, he's like, I'm not going to like that, but let me have a taste of that.
And because it's in that sort of, I keep wanting to say Arboretum, but I know that's not what it is.
You know, like a place where you buy plants.
Oh, yeah.
Because it's in the middle of it, you have all these people sort of walking around, looking at different plant things.
It's very peaceful.
There isn't a lot of traffic noise.
It just didn't feel like LA.
I don't know lot of traffic noise. It was, it just didn't feel like LA.
I don't know how to describe it.
I don't know why it didn't feel like it, but it definitely felt like we hopped on a plane and went to like Boca or something.
Well, that sounds fun.
It was fun.
It was a good time.
I was very pleased.
I was going to actually, this doesn't really relate to any of the restaurant stuff.
It relates more to the day.
All right.
Okay.
Okay.
It's like, uh, you know how people like all the days come up, like Father's Day, Mother's
Day, Valentine's Day, like all these days, everyone's like, it's a Hallmark holiday,
dude.
But here's the thing.
There are so many days now, right?
I feel like every day now has a day to the point where, like, those days actually feel
like they've become special days.
Now, you look at, like, some days, they're like, it's corn on the cob day.
It's a international handshake day.
It's like national apple strudel day, right?
Like there's so many days now.
I'm going to look this up.
Uh, national holidays, 2023.
Oh damn.
There's so many different holidays and observances and
this is okay it's a lot more insane than i initially thought you're right there are a lot
of days wow oh my okay so yeah july we start with independence day then n Nathan Bedford Forest Day? Nope. Nope. I don't like that one bit.
Nathan Bedford Forest Day.
That, uh, yeah.
Nope. That's not good. That is
only in Tennessee, though, which says
a lot. Okay. Yep. That
says a lot. And then
Bastille Day. And then
Rural Transit Day.
Parents Day. Wait, so there's a
Mother, Father's Day, and then Parents Day is a thing that exists.
We don't need another one of those.
We already have them.
Pioneer Day, only in Utah, which I think is very funny.
Yep, yep, yep.
Wait, Korean War Veteran Recognition Day, but only in West Virginia?
That's not the place I would imagine that.
But then in the entire country, National Korean War Veterans Armistice Day is the exact same day.
So does West Virginia want its own thing?
I don't know.
August is, wow, August has a lot too.
August is like, August 1, Colorado Day, celebrating Colorado.
August 4, Coast Guard Day.
August 4, again, Barack Obama Day, but only in Illinois, uh, August sixth
American family day, but only in Arizona. August seventh is purple heart day. August 14th is
victory day. August 15th is assumption of Mary. Yep. August 16th is Bennington battle day,
but only in Vermont. August 18th is Hawaii Statehood Day. August 19th is National Aviation
Day. August 20th is
National Navajo Code Talkers Day.
August 20th again is National Senior
Citizens Day. I guess they put both
them on the same day. August 26th is
Susan B. Anthony Day. August 26th
again is Women Equality Day.
August 27th is
Lyndon Baines Johnson Day.
August 30th is Raska Badhan.
I guess that's a Hindu holiday.
I guess.
I don't know.
That's just September has even more.
How is this possible?
That's what I'm saying.
There's so many.
September has almost every day.
What?
That's wild.
November is just as crazy.
December, just as crazy.
Here we go.
I got 20 weird holidays.
So we got January 3rd, Festival of Sleep Day.
You know what?
That's not weird to me.
That checks out.
We got January 14th, National Dress Up Your Pet Day.
January 24th, National Beer Can Appreciation Day.
You know what?
I don't get it, but I appreciate it.
That's not to be confused with National Beer Day,
which is April 7th.
National Fun at Work Day is
January 28th.
If any one of these
holidays was alive, that would be it.
That is very true.
I want you to
be happy day? What does that even
mean?
Hey, baby, smile
for me day. That's what that is.
I want you to be happy. That's it.
Hey, come on. Be happy, baby. That just sounds
like something like, hey, be happy. We're not going to do anything
about it, but I want you to be happy.
Just like cheer up or something.
March 20th is National Alien Abductions Day.
That's a mathless one.
We have
March 26th, Make Up Your Own
Holiday Day. Nope, that sucks.
That sucks. That sucks.
That's dumb. You just run out of ideas.
Then they just start filling in
like you guys do the work.
Number 8 is April 15th, National That Sucks Day.
Nope, that sucks.
That sucks.
Yeah, that sucks day sucks.
That sucks.
Number nine, Talk Like Shakespeare Day, April 23rd.
International No Diet Day, May 6th.
I mean, that's every day, but, like, yeah, I get it.
Yep.
June 27th is coming up.
National Sunglasses Day.
Cool.
That's awesome.
Great.
So cool.
July 3rd is Compliment Your Mirror Day.
Yeah, no, we've gone too far with this.
This is what I'm saying.
Who decides these?
Is there a committee?
There's one.
May 6th, National Explosive Ordinance Disposal Day.
I've had this landmine in my backyard for 55 years.
I've been saving it for May 6th.
It's, okay.
Like, I still want to know who creates these days because like somebody has to create these days and then like solidify them as a day right like they have to be approved
some company probably paid some guy to go to washington and pay some other dude to lobby
uh to get a day
for some sort of reason to sell some sort of crap.
It's usually what it is.
Wait, hold on.
I think I found it.
It says, meet the people behind all those wacky holidays.
Anyone can make up a holiday.
This woman made up 1,900?
I mean, I guess people have to do something with their free time,
but you could do anything else.
Yeah.
Let's see.
Do they say anything?
How does she create these holidays?
Cooper Smith started creating holidays, or holidays,
as she likes to call them, about 30 years ago
as a form of therapy after getting mugged in the lobby of her apartment.
What the shit?
How does one relate to the other? This was an event in and of itself that would change the entire course of my life.
Okay. In order to deal with the trauma attack, she started writing and creating cartoons,
which she merged with her love of holidays. She thumbed through a book that listed holidays and
thought a lot of them were dull and stupid. Quote, why not do events that are fun and whimsical?
a lot of them were dull and stupid.
Quote, why not do events that are fun and whimsical?
She's been dreaming them up ever since.
Dates mean a lot. She doesn't talk about
too many events in her life without mentioning the corresponding
date, November 13, 1995,
the day she first moved into her
first apartment after college.
Where does she
get all these ideas? From everywhere.
Well, yeah, she's just making up days.
Uh.
Well, yeah, she's just making up days. Uh. Well, yeah, she's just
making up days.
This isn't even, like,
this isn't answering the question.
Like, okay, I could
sit here and create days, but that doesn't mean anyone's gonna
use them. Like, how is she getting these approved?
Is she going to, like, the government?
That's what I want to know.
Wait, okay. Another holiday another holiday are they real though
i don't know if they're real like i mean just coming up here's a great example is to just give
you an example of how absolutely insane this is today is father's Right. But it is also Las Vegas World Martini Day, National Want to Get Away Day, International Sushi Day, World Sustainable Gastronomy Day, National Turkey Lovers Day, Splurge Day, and National Go Fishing Day.
Oh, and International Panic Day.
What?
Why would you want a panic day?
The International Panic Day is about finding time to manage and reduce stress.
Oh.
So we're going to call it International Panic Day?
It wouldn't be like International Relax Day?
That's just today.
That's one day, and they threw all those in here.
And it's Father's Day.
Yeah.
We already had things on this day.
We don't need more things.
It's too many things.
That's already one was enough.
Okay.
I found holiday insights.
How to create holidays.
International and national days.
Okay, here we go.
In the past few years, there's been a tremendous proliferation of daily holidays, special, wacky, bizarre, international, and national days.
You're telling me.
Lately, it seems everyone, especially companies and organizations, want to create their own special day.
Many people ask, just how does one go about creating a holiday or a special day?
That's a great question.
It sure is.
Creating a new holiday is fun and exciting.
Yeah, I know.
Now you want to share? I don't care. Let's explore how to create a holiday. Okay, here we go.
Anyone can create a new holiday, though the tough job is to gain recognition. Here are some tips.
Create the name for your holiday. Define what it's about. How should we sell it? Don't just tell me.
Okay. State the creation using all the information and definitions from the above steps.
Create a website for your special day.
The URL should be the title of the day.
Add relevant pictures.
Do SEO work.
Get your holiday and website recognized.
Okay.
Lately, new holidays are adding national.
Okay.
A truly national holiday is literally an act of
Congress and takes a lot of work.
We investigated the issue with a company
that wanted to create a national day and had the resources
to do it. They decided it was too much
work. Well, then why do we have
all these days? Are they not even approved?
Are these just days people
made up? So you're telling me that in theory, I could
go back, find the very first
episode of Terraria where I mentioned the space butterfly, make that space butterfly day, and then just sell the idea.
Like make a crappy website with like geocities and then be like, yeah, space butterfly.
It's a real thing.
We celebrate it on insert day.
And then I just live my life.
Yeah, that's it.
I feel like this is problematic.
And here's the reason.
Tomorrow, these are the four days get ready for this world sauntering day is a thing okay also juneteenth is a thing
then it's also world martini day which is a thing and international day for the Elimination of Sexual Violence Day. But don't worry, it's also National Garfield the Cat Day.
Yes.
Finally.
I just...
I've been waiting.
Just give it one day.
We don't need National Sauntering Day.
There's so many days.
It makes sense now.
None of them are actually approved.
There is people doing this just to be like,
hey, this is a day.
And then a bunch of people go, yeah, it is.
And that's it.
They just have a bunch of people celebrating it,
so it just becomes a day
because the amount of people celebrating it
makes people recognize it.
I guess.
They said the only requirements to be a true national holiday are
the president issues a proclamation an act of congress which requires a legislator to propose
the day in congress to vote approval in other countries the president or head of government
or the national legislature declares it to be a national day. That's it.
But how on earth? Alright,
June 1 is
somehow both
World Milk Day,
World Narcissistic Abuse
Awareness Day, and
National Nail Polish Day.
Why is, like how?
How are we allowing those three to happen at the
same time? That is a lot.
That is a lot.
I guess you can, I don't know.
It's too much.
It has to stop at some point, right?
Because there's going to hit a point where we just have too many days to celebrate.
Or at least 800 things every day.
Make the days relate.
Like, here's a great example.
On June 2nd, this checks out.
National Rotisserie Chicken Day. National Bubba day to celebrate all the bubba's out there okay and national donut day
and national rocky road off-road day and national leave office early day all those connect to me
for me all those relate i can see that yeah you just start tying them all together see that makes
sense yeah that's what we got to do.
Like, yeah, if you have, like, national, there we go,
we have National Relaxation Day.
So, like, you know, you can mix in, you know,
what are some relaxing things to do on that day,
make it those days as well.
It makes perfect sense to me if you just put it together, yeah.
Yeah, like, if you have National Relaxation Day,
have, like, National Sit in a Chair Day.
Like, wow, just sit in a chair.
Like, National Eat a Junk Food You Want a chair day. Like, wow, just sit in a chair. Like national eat a junk food you want to eat day.
Like, okay, boom.
Yeah, you're doing two things.
That's double celebration.
Yeah, but here's the problem.
People are trying to make this like every day is a celebration.
But when you're celebrating every day, it doesn't become special.
There you go.
Damn.
Damn.
It defeats the whole purpose.
And you say that, and I might tend to agree that if you
make every day special, then no days are special, but the pushback
would be, we're both wrong. Every day
is inherently special. That's true. I mean,
the people saying every day is special, they still
have days that are more special than others.
Sure, but that doesn't mean that every day isn't special.
Like National Megalodon Day.
Okay, well, still, it's these people just like, everything is a blessing, every day is special.
But yeah, there's going to be a day you enjoy more than another day, and you're going to rank that higher on the it was more special scale.
All right?
So that means it is more special,
which means certain days are more special than other days.
All right?
Checkmate, atheist.
I mean, you're not wrong.
I do like National Chocolaty Claire Day a little bit more than International Widows Day.
I'm just going to say one of those I think is a little bit more fun.
I would say, yeah.
of those I think is a little bit more fun.
I would say, yeah.
It's so
listen, I don't care
if people want to celebrate all the crazy days.
Maybe there might be somebody like every
day they wake up and they're like, what's today?
Is it National Lemonade Day? I'm gonna go get a lemonade.
That's cool. But I'm saying
it just, it feels like too much.
It feels like we're going a little crazy.
We gotta dial it back.
Yeah?
What would you, what rules would you institute in the world of holiday celebration?
I would say, I don't mind having, like, National Popcorn Day, but, like, they start kind of crossing over at a point.
Well, what is the point?
What is, you know, if popcorn is in, what is out?
Well, what is the point?
What is, you know, if popcorn is in, what is out?
Like, okay, instead of having National, like, Barbecue Chicken Day and National Ribs Day and all these sides,
just have National Barbecue Day and just combine them all into one.
But chicken is different than ribs.
Sometimes you want to honor barbecue chicken.
Barbecue both.
But then what if, you know, you want to cook out and not barbecue?
Too bad. You had to pick one.
Your totalitarian regime is off the rails.
And then go, oh man, I'm glad I ate barbecue chicken this year. Maybe next
year I'll go with the ribs. You have a new
appreciation that after that you're like, man, you know what?
Maybe I'll go back to the chicken.
I guess. I don't know.
I feel like now you're
restricting what people can enjoy.
Where's the freedom in that, man?
People are trying to enjoy too much.
There's the problem.
You can't have too much enjoyment.
It's like what I said with the, if there's somebody
that seems too happy, they're not happy.
There's something going on there.
Can't people just be happy?
They can, but I'm just saying there's being happy,
and then there's people that are just constantly too happy.
You're telling me that if I proudly and happily celebrate National Barcode Day, there's something wrong with me?
Well, National Barcode Day, There's something wrong with me.
Well, National Barcode Day, that's... I can see why you're happy.
Right, I mean, thank you.
I'm glad you can, because when it goes boop, boop,
you know, I love that.
It really speaks to me.
I mean, when you think about barcodes,
we use barcodes constantly.
Yeah, yeah, we do.
What would we do without barcodes?
You'd have to type in numbers on everything you
buy. Dude, our DNA
is like a bar code.
Damn, dude. Damn, dude.
See? Bar codes.
That deserves its own day.
Okay. Hold on. Hold on.
Hold on. This is important.
Starting with
Sunday, June 25th.
I'm going to let you decide what we're keeping.
Do you keep Day of the Seafarer?
I mean, if you are a seafarer.
No, no, no.
You are in charge.
Day of the Seafarer.
Keep it or no.
Okay, but there's questions.
Because you could probably celebrate this in a local area where there's a bunch of seafarers.
No, no, no. You're the one
in charge. This is national holidays.
Day of the Seafare. Is it in or out?
It's out. Alright. Global
Beatles Day. In or out?
I'd put it on a maybe.
We'll approve it again next year.
Damn. Alright. National Strawberry Parfait
Day. That's a little too
specific. So that's out?
No strawberry parfaits? Okay. Have a dessert day. National's a little too specific. So that's out? No strawberry parfaits? Okay.
Just have a dessert day. National
catfish day.
See, I feel like these are fine local
celebrations. No, no, no.
But I don't think these are national
celebrations. Mr. President,
we need the answer. We only have so many
spots. I don't think we can.
Alright, National Onion Day, Mr. President.
National Onion? Like, again President. National Onion Day?
Again, we'll have National Vegetable Day and National Fruit Day.
Okay.
We're going to have National Tubers Day as well.
What day is the right day for National Tuber Day, sir?
It's got to be on a Tuesday.
Tuber Tuesday.
All right.
In what month, sir?
Let's see.
What month do tubers grow or get harvested?
I guess in the fall?
Sure, sir.
I'm not quite sure.
I just work for you.
All right.
Yeah, hold on.
Tubers are produced during the short of the harvest, mid-November.
November.
All right. I'll mark it downNovember, November. All right.
I'll mark it down on the list, sir.
Thank you.
International Body Piercing Day.
You know what?
I'll allow that one.
That's kind of specific enough,
but not too specific.
See, if it was like
International Belly Button Piercing Day,
it's like, nah, I wouldn't want that.
But like body piercing, it could be like earrings. It could be literally, it was like, it was like international belly button piercing day it's like no i wouldn't want it but
like body piercing that could be like earrings it could be literally i was like sure fine so the
vague the vagueness is the point yeah it has to it's got to have some vagueness when you start
getting too specific that's when you start having a problem of too many days because we're at first
you give the catfish a holiday then you'd be be like, what about tuna day? What about cod day? Like, everybody wants a day
at that point. What about national
camera day? That's a maybe.
I can probably see a camera day.
But using your own logic, shouldn't it be
national electronics day?
Yeah, but I guess a camera
is in your phone at this point. This would
be like for old cameras. No phone cameras.
Ah, so
national antique camera day. day yeah national non-phone
camera day gotcha gotcha there you go what about um international asteroid day uh you know what we
need to learn more about asteroids all out okay yeah okay Yeah. Okay. And then, sir, what about national beans and Frank state?
That's an American staple.
That's a lot.
Right.
We have to keep it.
Yeah.
I know you're against specific days,
but how do you feel about national yellow pig day?
I mean,
if there's a yellow pig,
are there yellow pigs?
I looked it up.
I'm still not quite sure what this means because it says National Yellow Pig Day is July 17th.
It honors the unique attributes of the number 17 and its significance to mathematics.
The number 17 is a premium number in the arena of prime numbers.
Add the first four prime numbers together,
and 17 is their sum.
The average school bus weighs 17 tons.
Each of the following words has 17 letters.
Interdisciplinary telecommunication,
misinterpretation, commercialization,
electrophotometer,
photometer.
The atomic number of chlorine is 17.
Pebble Beach is known for its 17 long 17 mile
long drive the 17th amendment of the united states constitution how to observe it i don't
understand this at all oh yeah that is this is too much math for me i don't understand this one
i don't see any like actual yellow oh what, apparently, two mathematicians this is why national holidays are a mess.
So, two
mathematicians in the 1960s
were analyzing the random properties of the number
17 and a mysterious yellow
pig. It seems the process became
excessive and professional.
David Kelly, who's one of
the two, gave lectures and taught class
around yellow pig
and Michael Spivak made
publications around what is the pig though yeah i don't understand i don't get this holiday
and now i'm more fascinated by it and i gotta be honest i'm it's a keeper for me
all right yeah oh yeah i don't just fascination. We can keep that one.
Yeah. If we're going to keep that one, we have to
also keep National Hammock Day
and National Rat Catchers Day.
Uh,
yeah. Alright, see, this is
what happens.
It starts dominoing.
And before you know it, we're back to
square one. Here we are.
Back at square one.
Moral of the story is too many days. And before you know it, we're back to square one. Here we are, back at square one. Yeah.
Moral of the story is, too many days.
Yeah.
Too many days.
I believe that.
Some days, you know what?
Just wake up and go, you know what?
It's a Wednesday.
That's fine.
Some days it's fine to just be a Wednesday.
We don't need it to be anything crazy.
Yeah.
It's Wednesday, my dudes.
You know what?
It is also today.
Ooh, that's a stretch.
Oh, boy.
It's the day where I tell you about HelloFresh.
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National Advertisement Day.
I'm sure it exists.
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Let's go to chapter.
How's that traffic out there?
Oh, boy.
Oh, boy.
That man is losing it. I was i was like tripping over
my tongue there yeah you can't do that you gotta watch out i can't do that tongue's trying to cross
the street you trip you're run over by mouth traffic uh but out here we got real traffic
and uh it's pretty bad it's uh all backed up everyone's going places vacationing uh it's pretty bad. It's, uh, all backed up. Everyone's going places, vacationing. Uh,
it's, I wouldn't want to go anywhere right
now, but if you gotta, just
be prepared to wait. And, uh,
if you're good at waiting,
then that's good. Thank you.
Thanks, Crandor.
Now, let's go over to Crandor at the Weather Desk.
How's the weather?
Weather.
We got a weather request for, uh, let's's see we've been going all crazy overseas we're
going to green bay wisconsin oh boy yeah here we go green bay wisconsin my favorite for football
it is currently 73 degrees fahrenheit uh humidity 51 percent 28 point or 29.81 inches of pressure
9 miles of visibility
winds at 5 miles an hour
5.06am on the sunrise
8.40pm on the sunset
dew point 54
0 of 10 on the UV index
and a moon phase of a new moon
fresh moon coming out
take a look at the old 10 day
we got 85
mostly sunny on Monday, 82
sunny on Tuesday, 85 sunny on
Wednesday, Thursday 86 mostly
sunny, Friday 86 partly cloudy,
Saturday 85 partly cloudy, Sunday 80
PM thunderstorms, and Monday
77 PM thunderstorms.
Pretty nice up in Green Bay,
Wisconsin.
I am...
None of this makes sense.
Maybe it's because I have to have a layover.
The first thing I saw when I loaded up Green Bay, Wisconsin
was it said a flight from Green Bay
would take eight hours
from LAX to Green Bay,
which makes no sense to me
because a flight from LAX to New York
is five hours.
So maybe that means that there's layovers, like a bunch of layovers?
There must be, because
like Chicago... Yeah, there's
connecting flights. Okay, I was about to say,
there's no way it would take eight hours.
Yeah, it would probably be like slightly more
than Chicago. It would probably be like four hours.
Yeah, that's... Okay.
I was like, time out! Don't lie
to me, Internet. Yeah, that makes
sense.
But hey, you can go to the National Railroad Museum when you're there.
That's fun.
There you go.
You got numerous Culver's.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, that's true. You gotta have your Culver's.
Yep.
Yeah.
Although they got some interesting places.
They got Zesty's Frozen Custard and Grill.
That is... This is like some 80s vibe. interesting places. They got a Zesty's frozen custard and grill. That
is, this is like
some 80s vibe. Dude, look
at Zesty's. Hold on.
You think that's an 80s vibe?
Here, not only is Zesty's,
I have a feeling the whole town's an 80s vibe.
Here's another restaurant called The Sardine
Can. I think it's a bar.
Oh, that's, oh yeah.
The whole thing is just like yeah we just oh my god
yeah no zesty's frozen custard is definitely like 1994 oh yeah 100 it has the chairs the booths
look like they are 100 from the same company that makes those cups that you would always those like
solo cups or whatever the ones you put coffee in
yeah I know what you're talking about
uh oh my god yeah
the sardine can
it's got some
people there yeah it's got a vibe
I'd probably enjoy myself
oh I probably would too they're probably watching the Packer
game I'd love that stop
stop this here's the
winner this is if I was in green bay this is
the place i would go it's called our place and it looks like a diner that i don't think has ever
been updated since it opened none of the chairs are the same the food 100 looks like it is like it hasn't the recipe hasn't changed in 45 years yeah that is that is some diner food yeah and the building itself holy shit it looks like
that's why i know it's good the building looks like it should be condemned
yeah like there's this picture of there hold. That picture straight up looks like a school cafeteria.
That's what I'm saying.
But like a teacher's lounge cafeteria.
But then what's crazy is in other pictures, it's a different room.
Oh, yeah.
Like, if you go to that...
Oh, that's the reason.
The one photo that you showed me is 2017.
The photo I'm looking at is 2023.
Oh, are they updated?
They updated.
Oh, all right.
Oh, yeah.
Look at this.
They brought in some new stuff.
It looks better, admittedly.
Look at those menus.
The menu of our place looks like if a lady with no graphics acumen at all working in a nursing home made a menu for the old folks to tell them they're going to get like pancakes, soup, omelet.
Oh, yeah.
I love this.
And you got like the pancake.
I think it's an egg or a pound.
You know what it is, but he's got four pancakes, man.
It's a perfect circle of a man and his coffee friend.
He's got four cans and then happy coffee friend. Yeah, it's like it's a perfect circle of a man and his coffee friend he's got four cans and then
happy coffee friend yeah it's like it's like cuphead but like you know cuphead's caffeine
addicted brother like cuphead like this coffee man he's got steam coming out so you know it's
hot coffee but like does it does it stay hot in there does they have to keep filling them up
this is how i know i would love this place. Oh my god.
Side orders of food.
If I want onion rings,
how much do you think onion rings, if you were
going to pay onion rings, how much do you think that'd cost?
At this place?
Just in general.
Well, it depends.
If you're...
LA onion rings are probably like $8.
And how much would you spend in Chicago?
Probably like $6.
Onion rings, $2.50.
Oh, yeah.
Dude, this place is a steal.
Yep.
Chicken breast sandwich, $4.
Yeah, oh my God.
These are some early 2000s prices
these are some and this is
the image I'm looking at is from 2021
and I can get
a Denver
sandwich which is scrambled eggs and
green peppers and onions
breakfast sandwich $4.50
oh my god
that's insanely cheap
this place is great.
And when we go to breakfast, I got like a side order
of ham costs like $4.50.
That's what I'm saying.
This place... This is our place.
This is amazing.
Oh, what the shit? Okay, I
didn't expect to find this here. This is the
Fall Lodge.
It's got a big-ass elk
logo. And it's got a big-ass elk logo.
And it's got elks inside.
I love Fah.
This is, wow.
I did not expect to see Fah mixed in with, like, Green Bay hunting culture.
You know what?
We should have, admittedly.
Yeah, it looks good.
It actually looks really good.
What's crazy is the prices here are crazy, too.
Yeah.
Yeah, oh, my my god even these look good
man we live in too expensive
of a place this is wild
oh yeah look at these owners
those definitely do look like people that
go hunting but also
they feel like they came from LA
and were just like yo if we go hunt here
but make like really good food.
They do have like kind of like a bro look.
It's pretty fun.
This place looks great.
I don't even know where Lambeau Field is.
I'm trying to find it.
The Tundra Lodge up.
We're getting close.
Yep.
There it is.
There's Lambeau Field.
The Tundra Lodge.
I'm still obsessed with our place.
I'm not going to.
I'm not going to gonna lie I love this place
uh
yo they got
hold on what is
dude
three egg omelette
ham potatoes onion
four bucks actually
$4.50
oh my god yeah all this stuff's under $5.
This is better prices than Subway.
Yeah, Subway in L.A. is trying to charge you $12 for a footlong.
Yeah.
I'd just go get a real sub at a real restaurant.
Why the hell would I go to Subway?
Yeah, it used to be $5 footlongs.
I think it's like $8 or $9 here.
What the hell?
That's dumb.
You guys were selling us fake bread up until a few years ago.
Yeah.
That's the whole point.
It's like cheap fake food, but then they're charging you normal prices.
I'm going to go somewhere else.
No thanks.
That's like McDonald's around here.
If you got a meal, let's say you got like a Big Mac meal.
Yeah.
How much do you think that would cost?
Let's see.
I think the last time I got a Big Mac meal, it was like
$12. That's what I'm saying.
$13.50, something like that?
Why would I get a big...
I just go literally anywhere else and get a
real hamburger. Yeah.
Yeah, that point. The whole point
is fast food isn't supposed to be cheap, and I
get it quick, and now you're charging me $13?
Get the hell out.
Yeah, that's stupid.
That's dumb. they do have yeah i don't here we go 4.8 stars from 1000 reviews the cheesesteak rebellion
now that's a place so many people died it was a dark time for this nation
the cheesesteak rebellion oh my god what's crazy about this is it's star wars themed It was a dark time for this nation.
Cheesesteak Rebellion.
Oh, my God.
What's crazy about this is it's Star Wars themed.
Yeah, they just have a bunch of Star Wars stuff. So it's like Han Solo fought for the Cheesesteak Rebellion.
What's actually crazy about it is the outside looks like an old sort of like veterans of
foreign wars bar
you know what I mean
it does
it does not look at Star Wars themed
at all and then you roll in and it's
all Star Wars stuff that's so funny
that is
not what I expected
I don't know what
their slogan means.
Cheesesteak Rebellion Established 2019.
Rebellions are built on OPE?
What is OPE?
Is that a thing?
That's a Midwest.
What does that mean?
What is OPE?
OPE is like, say you're walking in the store, right?
And somebody is like, you're walking out of an aisle and someone's walking and you like bump into each other you go oh oh i do that every time every time i didn't
know it had like a thing every time i am waiting for an elevator i've done that for years if i'm
like waiting for an elevator and then the door opens someone walks out instead of like you know
making sure no one's standing there i go oh yeah you go and the more north you go i've never seen it spelled ope i just thought it was a noise
yeah and the further north you go you go like oh sorry that's amazing oh i do that i do that
all the time yeah that's that's my go-to like every time you're like oh yeah oh and uh yeah
i don't know if they do it anywhere else like east East Coast, West Coast, but yeah, it's very Midwestern.
That's, yeah, I definitely am the only person in this city who does that.
There might be other Midwestern people, but I don't know.
I don't have any friend who, when they almost walk in,
the first person goes, oh, oh, oh, yeah.
Now I get it.
Rebellions are built on, oh.
Yeah, exactly.
And that's the weather.
All right.
What's going on, sports?
Sports.
Oh, boy.
Sports.
So we had a few big things happen in the NBA.
The Denver Nuggets won the NBA title.
They're the champions.
And in NHL, the Las Vegas Golden Knights won the Stanley Cup.
They did. And frankly, here for it, the Golden Knights put Knights won the Stanley Cup. They did.
And frankly, here for it.
Golden Knights put on a show every time.
Yeah, they do.
So congratulations.
Those are done.
And now it's only baseball and Ray and the Mother Sports.
I just discovered this past weekend that my mom loves the Dodgers.
I had no clue.
Really?
Did she watch all the games?
That's a great question. She was like, do I go to a Dodgers game? I love the Dodgers. And had no clue. Really? She like watch all the games? That's a great question.
She was like, do I go to a Dodgers game? I love the Dodgers. And I was like, sure. So I got a
message today. She's like, in September, we're
going. I'm like, okay. Alright.
Yeah, I want to know how
diehard of a fan she is for the
Dodgers. My dad's a Pirates
fan. I think my mom just like got swept
up in like, you know, it's LA. If you're
in LA, you're here for the Dodgers. And so I think she's like got swept up in LA. If you're in LA, you're here for
the Dodgers. I think she's
got swept up in it and I'm really
curious. I don't know.
This is brand new information for me. I found
out in the car ride yesterday.
You'd think she would have tried to get the Pirates-Dodgers
game then.
She didn't want to go there because she was afraid
my dad would get beat up.
He showed up in all Pirates gear and then we attacked. She's like, we don't want to go there because she was afraid my dad would get beat up. Ah, yeah, that probably would have happened. Because he showed up in all Pirates gear and then we attacked.
She's like, we don't want to go to a Pirates game.
Just like after every pitch, you'd be like, Dodgers suck.
I know he would.
I'm well aware he would pick a fight, yes.
Yeah, that makes sense.
Well, that's it.
Yeah, maybe she just randomly likes the Dodgers from being in L.A. now.
I don't know.
I have no clue, but I think that must be it.
But, yeah, I love it.
I was blown away.
I was like, I would love to go to a game.
Yes.
Okay.
Baseball's fun.
Yeah.
Just go there.
You have a beer, a hot dog.
Watch baseball and leave.
I mean, yeah, there's no way that I would expect it to be an exciting game.
But yeah, I'll watch. I'll have fun.
Yeah, I've been to quite a few baseball games, actually.
I think I've been to like five, four or five.
Yeah, they're always fun to go to, but the baseball is the least fun part.
That makes any sense. Usually you're like whoa thank you yeah then you're like hey another beer over here a hot dog
too and then you watch the weirdos in the crowd and the people who get like really worked up and
there's always one couple that's fighting for some reason yeah there's always there's always
something to see in the baseball game and then And then every once in a while a pitch happens. We're like, oh, that was neat.
That was like back in when my friend Nick came to visit
because he wanted to see a Cubs game.
He's like, got to go to Wrigley Field.
And then we went and they were playing the Royals from Kansas City.
And there were some big Royal fans there.
And that was when the one woman had the Namaste y'all shirt on.
And she was right next to us.
We were just like, yep.
And then she was like, hey, you guys aren't cheering for the Royals?
And we were like, yeah, because it's Chicago.
It's like, all right.
So were you in the away section?
Is that where you were?
No, we were literally just sitting in the stadium.
There shouldn't even be an away section.
I guess they might have just...
I guess they might have just claimed that
as the away section.
We are going to this section.
That's their section.
You were just with all the Royals fans
and they were like, what are you doing here?
And you're like, I live here.
What do you want?
I guess because they're in the American League.
So their rival Chicago team is the White Sox.
I was just like, listen, I don't like the White Sox,
but I'm not going to cheer for the Royals.
They're like, hey, that's good enough.
All right.
Yeah, you take what you can get.
I understand.
I get it.
So speaking of baseball, we got the Tampa Bay Rays in first
with the Orioles in second place five games behind.
Just kind of funny because the Yankees are in third, ten games back,
and the Red Sox are in last place.
So you got the Rays and the Orioles up top.
Twins in first in the Central.
You got the Texas Rangers in first in the West.
Then the National League.
You got the Atlanta Braves up top in first.
You got the Brewers in first in the Central.
Tight race.
You got the Reds half a game back, Pirates two and a half back,
and the Cubs four back.
And then in the West, you got the Diamondbacks in first
with the Giants in second three and a half back.
And the Dodgers four games back.
Look at that.
And that is sports.
Oh, yeah.
All right.
What's our fact of the day?
Fact of the day.
Yeah.
Yeah. the day fact of the day yeah yeah our fact of the day is lobsters taste with their feet what that's right tiny bristles inside a lobster's little pincers are their equivalent to human taste
buds meanwhile lobster's teeth are in one of their three stomachs. Lobsters
are one of these foods some
professional chefs cook in the microwave.
What the shit?
I'm
more shocked that people are cooking lobster in a microwave,
but more importantly, they have their feet
I just learned that their feet
taste and they have a stomach with teeth.
Yeah.
That's all new information to me i'm like
whoa what yeah that shit's crazy although i've heard lobsters are like insanely smart
yeah i i guess i mean we catch them and eat them so they're not that smart
oh it says lobsters are one of the smartest animals in the ocean. They have a complex social life and maintain strong relationships with their fellow lobsters.
Okay, we'll see.
Sight can't be reached.
Okay, let's see about that.
It says sight can't be reached.
I think the lobsters took it down.
Or the lobster haters took it down.
Yeah.
Big lobster was like, no, thank you.
I'm not liking that one.
Yeah. Either way, now like, no, thank you. Big Lobster's not liking that one. Yeah.
Either way, now you know.
All right.
Well, what is our big news story of the day?
Big news story of the day.
Mm-hmm.
California family finds one million pennies while cleaning out old house.
I saw this for some reason.
Yeah, okay.
I mean, that's incredible.
Good on them.
I don't know how they're going to cash that all in and get the money, but like, okay.
I don't know.
Let's see.
When California real estate agent John Reyes went to Los Angeles to clean out the former home of his father-in-law, he expected to find some trash.
Instead, he found some cash.
More than one million.
I hate these articles so much.
I've come to expect it at this point.
Yeah, I hate it.
More than one million copper pennies.
Reyes, a real estate agent in Ontario, California,
found the massive amount of moolah worth at least $10,000
last year in a crawlspace under a home that once belonged to his father-in-law, Fritz,
who'd lived there with his brother for decades.
Wait.
Oh, he found it last year.
Okay.
Wait, why is it coming out now?
Reyes, his wife, Elizabeth, and other family members have spent the last few years
cleaning out the home in hopes of renovating it.
But it was a daunting task for one simple
reason. They kept everything.
Reyes says the crawlspace was so
tight that family members had to get on their knees
to reach some of the corners.
We were trying to do a thorough job,
Reyes said, and as a result
started finding a bunch of loose pennies
before discovering boxes and bank
bags filled with pennies made
before the U.S. switched from copper to zinc in the 1980s.
So that's a million pennies,
but technically it would be worth more than a million dollars
because it's the copper ones, right?
Yeah, they're like the rare pennies.
Yeah, okay.
So that's pretty crazy.
Yeah, that's neat.
After weighing the bags and determining the approximate amount in each bag,
family figured there were at least one million pennies in the crawl space.
But the answer to that question brought up another question.
What do you do with all the pennies?
Reyes figured they'd take the coins to a Coinstar machine, but that idea was quickly nixed.
We didn't want to pay 8%, and there's no way we could take these all the way home to Ontario.
They tried to exchange the pennies at a nearby Wells Fargo, which didn't have enough space.
Reyes and family then transported the pennies in two trucks to a bank closer to their home, only to have that bank refuse to take them as well.
But after bank employees suggested combing through the pennies in search of particularly rare coins, the family decided to put the whole copper kit and caboodle on offer up for $25,000, which is admittedly more than face value of the pennies.
Quote, we want to sell them, but we want to know, but what we know is there's some craze on the internet of people looking for a million dollar penny.
We just want to sell them to someone who knows they can sell for more than penny value.
Since OfferUp is set up as a bunch of local sites, Reyes is asking anyone else who may be interested in the pennies to message him via Instagram.
However, as KTLA
notes at the bottom of this article, you'll have to figure
out how to transport the pennies yourself.
Well, all right.
Yeah, I mean, I figured that's the biggest problem is
how do you then turn that
into actual, like,
real currency? You know.
You gotta, like, go through all of them. You have to like go through all of them you have to know
about coins but then you have to know about coins while going through a million pennies though a
million pennies that's i i wonder if you could just go to one of those uh one of those damn
things called the star things where you put the money in the grocery store yeah well if you're
just like f it put it in a bin. I don't even care.
Well, that's what they said.
I think they said they were going to do that.
Oh yeah, Coinstar. But he said they didn't want to pay
the 8%. Right. Well, you shouldn't.
But I can imagine someone just being like,
screw it. I don't care.
That'd be me. I wouldn't care.
But again, because they're special.
Pennies we have now aren't
even worth one cent.
Yeah.
No.
So there could be some rare one in there that's worth like $20,000 by itself.
Yeah.
It seems like a new lifelong like, all right, well, this is it.
This is what I'm doing for the next year or two.
It's just going through these pennies.
That's like you got to hire people to look through the pennies.
Oh, my God.
You know what they should do?
They should sell it to like, what's that show where they find shit in the lockers?
Storage Wars.
Sell it to Storage Wars and then have somebody find it like Dave.
And he's just like, yeah.
And he's like, a million pennies.
One of these got to be good.
He'll have like his like hundred workers like sort through the pennies or some shit.
Yeah, I would be really
curious. Yeah, that'd be
great. There you go.
Look at that. Look, great ideas.
What a great idea. Well, speaking
of great ideas,
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This probably just sounds like jumbled stuff
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Or just go to JessicaCox.com.
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Look how easy that is.
I could do that, but you could just
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That's good enough. Hell yeah.
That's it for us. Thanks so much. We'll see you all
next time and as always, shake the
rhino. To be continued.