Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 395 - Chipotle's Stealing Husbands

Episode Date: August 4, 2023

The boys are back and this time Jesse has got the VEGAS stories! Meanwhile Crendor keeps hitting his head. Someone has to baby proof that man. Then for some reason things get creepy in a Burger King, things get sexy in a Chipotle, and none of it is as weird as Jesse's hotel room. All this and more on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://factormeals.com/cox50 and use code cox50 to get 50% off. Go to http://meundies.com/cox to get 25% off your first order and free standard shipping.

Today's episode is brought to you by Factor. Factor's gonna get you those good meals. Also today we're brought to you by MeUndies. MeUndies are the undies that I have on me. Let's jump into this podcast! Hello everybody, it's time for Ghost on Trend Dog! This is Trend Dog in the morning. In the morning! Broadcasting live, live, live, live, live! In 4-hour recording studios! Recording! Hello everybody and welcome to another episode of Cacks and Credo in the morning.

Hey, it's another exciting episode. Here we are. Yep, here we are. Here we are. Yep, here we are. Here we are. Yes. We didn't have an episode last week. That's true. That's true. We were off. We lucked out. You're at your convention thing.

I was at my convention thing, and I'm headed to another convention thing mere hours after we filmed this. Yeah, and then I was still healing from my brain, so it's probably a good thing. convention thing mere hours after we filmed this. Yeah. And then I was still healing from my brain. So it's probably a good thing. I'm still healing from my brain. Makes me think you haven't healed from your brain. Oh, I still haven't. Me still heal from brain.

Me still heal from brain. Here's the thing. If I said that normally, you'd just be like, ah, it's just Crandor. But now since I had all that, it's just like just like ah at least now i can blame it on that uh right right let me tell you the update because already yesterday i was okay let me just tell you the update so uh i pretty much saw the doctor again they were just like yeah you're recovering well you just it takes time pretty much like a lot of concussions take like a couple weeks pretty much is what they were saying so i was like all right and so i was like as long as i'm getting better that's all i care about i don't care if

it takes a little bit like as long as i'm seeing the progress so i was seeing the progress the one day i was like dude i'm feeling like 50 better than i was feeling 60 better i saw sinvicto last friday he actually came in from out of town i did see a tweet about that yeah i saw him messing with the cat yeah yeah so that's what i was feeling i was feeling like 40 better that day so he wanted to go out to eat but i was like i don't think i can go out to eat right now so we just uh we got deep dish pizza he liked it it's a good time um and then uh every day i was feeling a little better. Then on, I think when I saw the doctor, it was like Monday.

And he was like, yeah, it seems like you're doing better. And I wasn't. On, I want to say like Tuesday or Wednesday. Wednesday. I was feeling like 80% better. Maybe even 90%. I was like, dude, I was feeling good. And then what happened?

What'd you do? 90 i was like dude i don't need like i was feeling good and then what happened what'd you do i did a classic crendor where i aggravate my symptoms for really just whatever i stomach pain re-aggravated right pelvic floor re-aggravated so what i did this is like the dumbest thing too i was getting into my car with my food I picked up, right? And my the asphalt and everything is a little like tilted so you know how the car door just starts like closing on you? Yes.

So I was getting in. I'm already cringing waiting for this. Yeah. So it started closing in. I was like, oh, and I kind of off balance bumped my shoulder into the car and it made my head go like, uh, uh. It wasn't like bad. I didn't like go like, I didn and it made my head go like it wasn't like bad I didn't like going like I didn't like shake my head violent it was just it was just enough to where it's it like re-aggravated my symptoms a little

bit and I was like you gotta be shitting me from like getting into my car with my food so it wasn't like bad you know how like if you're recovering from like a sprained ankle or something and you like might maybe like tweak it or something it's not as right you know don't walk on it in vegas for a few days yeah i know i'm aware i'm aware of that yeah so it was like i essentially had taken probably like eight steps forward and this was like taking two or three steps back and so that was like two days ago. So I've taken another couple steps forward. I'm doing, I'm probably back to like 75, 70%.

Rest, oh my God, rest. It's, you are. The thing is, I've been resting, okay? It just so happens that getting into my car, just so happened to have like a, my car turned into like a football player. Have you tried baby proofing everything you own? I'm the bubble rat myself.

You really should. You should become a bubble boy. And I should have to wheel you out, or roll you out on stage for the show. So then, I was like, alright, you know, as long as I keep getting better, that's all the thing. So I'm just, you know, still taking it easy. Like, I'm fine. We went out for breakfast yesterday. Like I'm doing good. I'm back when I like first had it, that shit's like, it's weird. Like I didn't even want to talk. I was just constantly just like, uh, like I'm, I'm doing all right. So like my eyes, I still get my eye strain, but that's like one of the last things to go. So, but I can, I can do a lot more than I

used to. So, you know, as long as I i'm progressing but yesterday when i tweeted out like yeah you know what i'm taking it easy or whatever some people were like krendor this is serious or like all right did you go to the hospital i'm like dude i like i'm fine like oh my god some of the concussion stories i've heard from people like my god dude one guy in my chat he's had concussion symptoms for 20 years because he said he had a crate of paint cans, like full paint cans fall on his head. And he got like a grade five concussion, which is the worst you can get. And so he's had that for like 20 years. And I was like, Jesus, dude, I guess he lived, though. I mean, that sounds like that would kill you.

Like straight up. I guess he lived though. I mean that sounds like that would kill you. Yeah, he could have died. Like straight up. One other dude was like, yeah I slipped in the shower and I hit my head on the shower handle, then the like counter, and then the something else. So he hit it like three times and passed out and threw up on himself. I was like, alright, yeah. I'm glad I didn't do any of those. Oh man. After hearing some other people, then I've been hearing, like, I ask everybody now, like, you ever have a concussion? Like, one dude at the gym was like, oh, yeah, I got, like, two wrestling. And he was like, they weren't that bad.

They just took, like, two to three weeks to heal. I've seen worse. And I was like, Jesus, okay. And then. I guess everyone has their own tolerance for concussions. I guess if you're an athlete, you obviously get a lot in comparison to most normal people because you're constantly in compact sports. Dude, watching the women's soccer tournament, I saw probably 20 concussions watching that. That shit was wild.

Jeez. They're just bashing their heads together trying to get headers literally just hitting the ball with their head like i was like that's that's got to do something i mean yes it definitely does that's i mean it is known doing that enough does something yeah so i was like no thank you um then someone I think by uh, there was one person there just like, yeah I got one when I was like, I was only like seven, but like I fell off a thing and like fractured my skull. That's like oh, okay. I mean I guess I probably have had something. I've had a stick through my head. When I was

a child I had an x-ray machine bit fall on me i had i got hit in the head with a golf club i got i mean i gotta have something when was the golf club well when i was in roanoke virginia blacksburg virginia um when i was a child my next door neighbor uh and i would like hang out there was like you know it was like the kids on the block right and there was kids the end of the block and then my next door neighbor and we would like hang out. It was like the kids on the block, right? And there was kids at the end of the block and then my next-door neighbor, and we'd all like hang out together. He was my buddy. We'd all hang out together.

And one day we like got his dad's golf club stuff, and we started fake golfing because we were, I don't know, less than 10, right? And we were just playing, and somehow I put down the tee and the golf ball, and he, I guess, didn't notice that I wasn't out of the way, and he swung and, like, swung, swung, and hit me right in the head. Oh, my God. Yeah. Yeah, that probably did something. I mean, that was a full swing. Yeah. Yeah, that's... That probably did something.

I mean, that was a full swing. Yeah. As hard as a child can swing, it hit. It was a driver, so it wasn't necessarily... Probably the nicest of the ones to be hit by. Yeah. Wedge, that would have been rough. That would have been a chip out of my face.

Yeah, that's not good. So yeah, that's pretty much my update. I am getting better, which, listen, that's the thing. My hypochondria was like, Dr. John, do I got a brain bleed? Dr. John, he's just like, as long as you're getting better. So, yeah, I've been getting better. It's take it easy. I'm able to at least stream and edit videos again, which is all I care about.

As long as I'm getting better and I can work. Yeah, you can work, right? Because that first week, I could not work. It was bad. But yeah, we're on the uprise until I get bumped into the car getting my food.

I can't wait for next week when you're like, so there I was standing still, doing absolutely nothing. And then it happened again. Someone hit me with a golf club. That was crazy. Yep. Yep.

Let me tell you my two stories I had. Okay. So we were out at breakfast yesterday. I heard these old women say, I wrote it down, quote, Jason Momoa's a very handsome man. How old? Time out. It all depends on how old they are. Because it's like, yeah, I get it if they're 60, but if they're 90, hilarious.

I want to say they're like 70s. Alright. I mean, I can still see 70 being like, yes, very attractive, but the older they get, the more funny it becomes. Because then they're like Nana level, where they being like, yes, very attractive. But the older they get, the more funny it becomes. Because then they're like Nana level, where they're like, oh, that Jason Boboa. Like, you know. Yeah.

So it's just, as long as things, you hear the old women being like, I love the handsome young men at breakfast. You're just like, all right, what the shit? One of my favorite, it might have been a Vine. It was an old video, was of the old ladies at brunch or out to dinner or something. And the waiter keeps coming by and he's like a very attractive young man. And it's the waiter being like, you got to treat the women right. And he like goes up and starts basically flirting with all these old women.

They keep giving him great tips. And I'm like, man, this guy has it figured out. Yeah, so that was my main thing there's other like breakfast stuff there's like this one zoomer couple and she was just like and ashley was talking to jessica and jessica just couldn't even believe it and he was just like bro what the fuck but it's funny because he was like genuinely like interested he's just like that's fucked up dude yo what and she would just like keep talking and he's just like damn bro so that was funny uh i love that all of your stories are mirrors of stories that i have for you it's wild that is fine um let's see was there anyone else i saw as crazy not really there's this one guy who had like

longer hair it was like very very emotional he reminded me of like a hollywood producer type but a little crazy almost like an m night shamalan or something okay and he i mean yeah but he was just like being really loud talking to this other guy so you could just hear everything he was saying and he's just like i couldn't even piece together what he was talking about but he was just like being really loud talking to this other guy. So you could just hear everything he was saying. And he was just like, I couldn't even piece together what he was talking about. But he was just so emotional about stuff. He would be like, there is no way. There is no way. And he would just say stuff like that.

And I'm like, what are they talking about? Probably something like, dude, I got five cheeseburgers for $5. There's no way. There's no way That's true he could have That's what I'd be passionate about there's no way in this economy So yeah, that was that then

Okay, this was the crazy one so I was walking around so I had nothing else to do when I was you know recovering I was like, oh let's go for walks, whatever. So I was walking past I was walking past this bar and there are these two people loudly talking clearly drunk And they said some of the craziest shit I've ever heard That's this is good. This is already good. It's gonna be great. Yes, go on So this lady just goes what was his name hippie Mike and then she goes yeah hippie Mike and she's like oh shit hippie Mike he's the one that lived with the raccoon for a while and it gets better that she is like wait wasn't he the one doing I want to know Hippie Mike so badly. And it gets better.

Then she's like, wait, wasn't he the one doing ketamine? And they're like, yeah, he's the one that did ketamine. And I was like, that definitely checks out. That definitely, definitely checks out. Hippie Mike and his raccoon pal doing ketamine. I'm here for it. Yep. They sound like a great time. Yeah.

And that's all I got. got but really that was all i needed to get it's really all you need that gets you through a week that was easily a week i see why you don't want to stay at home and rest because if you do you're gonna miss out on all this great stuff exactly well i mean you're supposed to walk you need to get your cardio your exercise if anything it helps you heal faster walking. Sure. And I can't lift. So, I mean, aside from, like, you know, lifting baby weights.

I love it. Listen, stupid baby weights. Weights made for babies. That's all I can do anymore. Baby weights. In fact, I was doing some, like, two to five pounders again a few days before it happened i was like dude nice you know i'm slowly getting back and then boom now i gotta start back at the twos damn damn baby weights baby weights for baby credor uh so those are my stories very fun well i went to vegas so my stories are like those stories, but to the extreme. You got something between raccoons and hippie monkeys? Oh, I got stuff, let me tell you.

I got stuff. So it turns out that Vegas, by the way, is 108, 111, 114 degrees. It's crazy. It feels like your eyeballs have a fan blowing it, like an air dryer, like a hair dryer set to max heat blowing your eyes. It's crazy. It is not a place I like at the moment. No.

But for some reason, I'm going back. Yeah. So the minute I land, right, I get off the plane, get down to the terminal, find my bags, leave. My car ride to the hotel, the guy driving the car was, the best way to describe him is I think he thought he was more important than he was, but he clearly was a helper. He was one of those dudes that every time someone came over the walkie-talkie or the CB or whatever it is, and they're like, the traffic's bad on the intersection here.

Where can I go? And he'd pick up and be like, all right, so what do you want to do is you want to go down, take three lefts and a right, head over to McCharles. Okay? And once you're there, go around the loop. This guy had it all figured out. It was incredible. And I started talking to him because I was like, man, it sounds like you kind of know this city.

He's like, I know all about Nevada. And I was like, yeah? And he's like, I go everywhere. Where do you want me to take you? Where do I want to take you? I'm like, I mean, to my hotel preferably. And he's like, haha, but you know, I can take you anywhere. Do you need drugs? I can get you drugs. Do you need drinks? I can get you drinks. Do you want to go north? There's a lot of hookers

up north. I can get you them. And I was like, no, I just want to get to my hotel, man. And he's like, okay, I get you them. And I was like, no, I just want to get to my hotel, man. And he's like, okay, I know everything about Nevada. I was like, well, tell me a secret. What secret do you know about Nevada? Like, what's the thing a tourist should know? And he goes, aliens. I was like, what?

He's like, aliens are in Nevada. I'm like, what do you mean? He's like, you know how it's so hot here? I'm like, yeah. He's like, the know how it's so hot here? Like, yeah. He's like, the aliens come to this planet. Get ready for this. For disaster tourism. They love to watch us kill each other. In fact, the aliens are here to watch the world end. That's why they're here. And I was like, how do you know this? And he was like, I have my sources. I was like how do you know this And he was like I have my sources

And I was like oh Okay I did not inquire further I was like maybe I shouldn't Inquire further To be honest You should have prodded a little further I should have prodded a little further You're correct but

The conversation quickly moved on to like He saw a sign that said the hotel I was staying at is also where Barry Manilow is. He's like, oh, you're going to go see Barry? He's like, no, I'm not going to go see. He's like, I saw Barry. Barry was very good. He's like, no,

no, I'm not going to see Barry Manilow. And he's like, oh, you should though. He said, it's an easy ticket to get. I was like, I'm alright man, I'm fine And then At the hotel I get there, check into the front desk Woman there is like, Mr. Cox

It looks like we have you in Oh Oh, interesting, okay, so The room we had you booked in Is not available at the moment However, we do have another room Which is much better, we had you booked in is not available at the moment. However, we do have another room, which is much better. We can put you in that. I was like, oh, okay.

Yeah, I'll take an upgrade. She's like, wonderful, wonderful. Okay, so how many keys will you need? And I was like, you know, just one for me. She's like, excellent. Okay, so here is the key for room 2860, and here is the key for room 2862 and I'm like what she's like huh so this room is attached to this room and together they complete your room what the shit I was like what so I was like is there any is it two rooms is

there any extra charge she's like no no no Same price don't worry Enjoy your stay sir I'm like uh okay So I go up to the floor And go to the first door Open it inside Are two beds

Four walls A TV Nothing else except another door Alright so like a normal room But no no bathroom four walls, a TV, nothing else except another door. Alright. What? It's like a normal room. But no, no bathroom. Oh.

Okay. And a door, that when I open it, another door is behind it. I'm like, oh, this must be the connector to the other room. So I go out, go to the other room,

use that key card, open that door. It is, in fact, the connector between the two. Except this room looks like a 1960s shag palace. When you go in, the middle of it has a series of couch chairs that are curved around a pit in the middle of the room. And there is very clearly a hole that is covered that at some point was 100% a stripper pole. Oh, yeah.

It's like where a stripper pole was at some point. Right? This was definitely an orgy fiesta. Yeah, and then there's a bar that's also curved, and the bar has all these, like, old books. I'm gonna let you know I checked every old book for money. I was like, this is the place where some

old man would have stored his fortune Yeah Nothing and the books were so old there was nothing in them It was just you open them like and it was like fake books. It was great like you're just you're playing Baldur's Gate But in real life you're also playing Baldur's Gate I was like I gotta look and then um There was another bed in that room, but a huge bed

Again this was an orgy palace. Oh, yeah. This is, this is. And then the bathroom was in this room, and the bathroom was, you know, a normal bathroom, except the sink was three sinks wide. Oh. With multiple mirrors. Oh, yes.

And mirrors looking into where the shower was. And I was like, oh, okay, interesting. Except it wasn't a shower, Crandor. It was a giant tub. Like, it could fit 12 people, probably. Multiple faucets. Yes, dude, this entire room. This is probably where Barry Manilow bangs.

Because I've never seen anything like this. It was a marbled tub with multiple faucets and air jet things and all I wanted was a shower. And I was like, oh my God, there's got to be one shower. And I noticed in the corner of this tub one little spigot hanging

out over the edge that was head high. And when he turn it on, water came down. I was like, are you kidding me? I gotta get peed on by the wall in order to take it. It wasn't even pressure. It was just water falling from the sky. I was like, stop. No.

And it wasn't a spray. It wasn't like one of those hanging shower things with multiple streams. It was just like a normal, you know how when you turn on a tub and there's the – water pours in? It was that but like six feet up. I was like, come on. And so –

Like out in the country of like – Yes. Turn on the hose. It was just like that except there was no hot water. It was just warm or extra cold water It wasn't hot So every shower I took Was in like barely warm water

Trying to scrub down With the water because it's hanging out Just a little bit above Where the edge of the tub is So 90% of the water is only hitting the front of me And I'm just trying my hardest To like Turn around It sucked water is only hitting the front of me and i'm just trying my hardest to like all right i gotta turn

around and do this it sucked it sucked well i mean if you're in this suite they probably assume you're not taking showers you're having like other people wash you in that tub you're in with why stick me in this why they put me in the suite i would rather they have downgraded me to just a normal room. You know Barry Manilow is like, I got four women washing me down. That tub. It was the craziest. The tub had mirrors all around it. The tub had mirrors, dude. That's crazy.

That is crazy. So that, I mean, that happened. That was my stay. So that happened. That was my stay. But then because as always happens, I have for you Vegas plane lady story. Oh boy. This woman pulls out her phone, and the best way I can describe her is either she's fake Vegas or fake LA. Either way, she's fake. She's tan. 90% of her looks plastic.

Yeah. Classic. Yeah. And she pulls out her phone and loudly in the terminal begins talking about stripper drama. Oh, God. And I quote, she walked out of the club because she wasn't given the right attitude by the other girls. And then the person at the end of the line

goes, well, how did you want to be treated? And she goes, with class. With class. I was like, what? And so I kept listening because I was like, hold on. Is this woman a stripper? Because she looks to be about 60. Right. And so I kept like, hold on. Is this woman a stripper? Because she looks to be about 60.

Right. And so I kept listening. But what I noticed is that around her, because she's talking so loudly, everyone's kind of getting a little peeved. Right. And there was this couple. You know how chairs in airport terminals when you're waiting for your flight, one row faces one way and one row faces the other and it's sort of back to back? Well, one couple was directly behind her back to back and they kept giving each other looks. You know, they kept giving each other just like, oh my God, she needs to be quiet.

And the classic like. Yes, absolutely. Yeah. And they had a very Texan vibe. Right. They definitely had a don't mess with us we're from Texas Kind of attitude And next to them was

A woman and her two daughters And she kept trying to Plug the daughters ears because they were young And because this woman would be like That bitch I can't Believe what she did I saw her nipples and you know what gross Gross I can't believe what she did. I saw her nipples, and you know what? Gross.

Gross. Gross. And finally, the couple behind her loudly, the man turned around and said, you don't have to be so loud. And the woman looked at them, stood up, and then walked away while talking loudly. I guess her solution was, fine, fine i'll move rather than i probably should not have the phone on speaker and be loudly shouting into it yeah i mean it's starting to check out why she has all these stories yeah she's complaining about she wants to be treated to class dude yeah and the woman and her daughters that were you know next door the whole time

finally one of the girls goes mommy Mommy, what's her problem? And the mom looks at her and goes, some people, dear, some people. And so the flight starts to board. And I get on the plane. And she is right behind me. She's still talking. She's still going. And I'm sitting on this flight two rows behind her.

She's still going. The plane is still boarding. She's still talking. She's still going. And I'm sitting on this flight two rows behind her. She's still going. The plane is still boarding. She's still talking. And she's talking about, like, this is one of the things she said. If he contacts me again, should I even answer? Like, he was hot. But I know he's gonna say, you're rude. You're rude. And then she cackled

laughed really loud and then said, I didn't even get a kiss goodnight What the shit I don't know anything about this woman But I know She is unbearable Yeah That's uh

If you're betting the Vegas odds You're not gonna win any money on that one No but the best part The best part is finally the mom and the two girls come on and the girl goes she's still talking mommy and the mom grabs the girls as she walks by me and goes girls promise me you'll never be like that it was amazing. That's like straight out of a movie.

It was so good. I had to write it down. I was like, this is incredible. The crazy thing was, she was still talking on her phone long after they said, put your phone on airplane mode. She was talking on the phone as we're taxiing to leave when the flight attendants are doing the like fasten your seat belt and here's the inflatable thing yep finally one of the guys was like ma'am you have to put your phone away and she's like uh i'm taking off i'll land in an hour bye and hangs up oh my god i yo i again, she had the attitude of a woman who was, like, 22. Yeah.

But the physicality of, like, 65. Yeah, that checks out. I just, I don't know where to place this woman. She was talking about, like, fighting in a strip club. I don't know what's going on with her, but everything about her seemed like, yeah, yeah. She's a handful. Back in the day, back when your room had a pole in it,

she probably stripped for Barry Manilow. Probably. Probably. Full circle. Man, this woman's unbearable. She won't stop talking about stripping. I just want her to strip. Yeah, I I mean that's That sounds like a Vegas story

To be honest It was very Vegas yeah I couldn't tell if she was going to LA because She had to go to LA for something or if she Was leaving Vegas to return to LA I didn't know It's 50-50 I'll be honest I could definitely be either one

I could see her as a Vegas person or a Los Angeles person. If I had to guess, I'd say she's a Vegas person going to L.A. It's possible. I mean, Vegas in the morning is weird. Leaving, half the flight were people in hoodies who definitely were still hungover and sleeping in the terminal. And I was like, man, leaving at 8 a.m. is a wild thing from Vegas. Dude, that'd be me at 8 a.m. no matter where I was.

Oh, man, everyone was just like, they looked so hungover. It was wild. The plane ride was the quietest. Everyone was asleep. At least that woman wasn't talking on the plane ride. Yeah, I mean, i don't know she seems like the type that would talk to herself well there's someone next to her she was talking to and at the end of the flight he got her luggage so i don't know if that was some dude who was with her or if she just made him get her luggage. Probably that, yeah.

He was probably like, oh God, I gotta talk to this woman. I mean, he did. They had a conversation on the flight. I just don't know what it was about because it was quiet. Yeah, I mean, it's probably, it's like when I had to talk to that one guy on the plane from LA to Chicago. He got his name. Sure. It was like Rick or Gary or some shit.

What was his name? uh it was like rick or gary or some shit what was his name i can't remember he was the guy that found jesus but he used to deal drugs his front was like uh he lived like a gta like his front was like some car wash car detail place and he's like yo we did good car detailing but we dealt drugs no Not only do I remember that story, I love that story. I was just like, damn, man, that's crazy. That was a fun one, though.

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If you're not completely satisfied, it's on MeUndies. So why the wait? Get 25% off your first order at MeUndies.com slash Cox. Also today we're brought to you by Factor. Now that we are in the thick of summer, you might be looking for wholesome, convenient meals to support sunny, active days where sometimes it is way hotter than it should be. Factor, America's number one ready-to-eat meal kit, can help you fuel up fast with flavorful and nutritious ready-to-eat meals delivered straight to your door. You'll save time, eat well, and stay on track reaching your goals.

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And it's not just the meals they have, right? They also have 45 plus add-ons, including breakfast items like apple cinnamon pancakes, bacon and cheddar egg bites, potato bacon and egg breakfast skillets. They even got cold press juices,, and smoothies. Factor is great. It's a quick, easy, delicious meal. And if you want to get in on it, all you got to do is head over to factormeals.com slash cox50 and use code cox50 to get 50% off. That's code cox50 at factormeals.com slash cox50 to get 50% off. All right, Crandall, let's go over to Traffic.com. This is Kyle with Crandall.

How's that traffic out there? Traffic is still a little crazy, but it's calming down. Everybody's gone on their vacations. They're coming back. They got school starting up soon. But it's still hot outside. Everyone's still doing stuff, still getting around. So it's traffic-y out there.

Yeah. Thank you. Thanks, Crandor. Alright! Let's go to weather. Weather time. We've got a weather request for their hometown of Braga,

Portugal. Fun fact, Braga was one of the most important cities in the Iberian Peninsula when it was part of the Roman Empire. It was called Bracara Augusta back then. Also, check out Bom Jesus Cathedral. Born Jesus Cathedral. I imagine it's Bom Jesus de Monte, I assume. That's probably it, yeah.

But I like Bom Jesus Cathedral because this place is amazing. Yo, I absolutely hate the stairs here. Holy moly. Look at this thing. That is the whole hillside is stairs going up to this cathedral. I guess you've got to earn your way into heaven there. Damn. Let's see. Wow.

Yeah, look at that. That is crazy. It's beautiful. Like, architecturally, it's beautiful. Spiritually, my knees are already feeling it. Yeah. Let's see. Braga, Portugal.

Home of Bomb Jesus. Bomb Jesus. Currently 68 degrees right now high of 85 low of 58 humidity 54 percent pressure at 30.16 inches nine mile visibility two mile an hour winds 631 a.m. sunrise 8 48 p.m sunset dew point 50 uv index zero and a moon phase of waning gibbous looking at the 10 day 93 and sunny saturday 98 and sunny sunday 99 on monday and sunny 99 tuesday sunny then it cools off 84 mostly sunny wednesday 86, partly cloudy Thursday. Friday, 87, partly cloudy. And Saturday, 87, mostly sunny. Sunday, 86, mostly sunny. I am trying to figure out what the restaurant scene here is because I found a restaurant called Gusto Superior.

And I'm going to let you know, I don't know how you would define this food at all. I'm going to send this to you. I guess healthy vegetarian, but there's meat. Dude, I don't know what any of this food actually is. It looks like a blend of numerous types of food. That's kind of crazy. Yeah, I was like, oh, gusto superior.

That should be fun. Can't tell you what the hell it is. Meanwhile, Mimo's Smokehouse is literally just barbecue. Oh, yeah, that sounds about right. Like, it just, it literally looks like there's, like, ten different cultures blended together at this place. Yeah, I'm trying to figure it out, and I'll let you know I cannot. One's like lasagna with french fries.

That's what I'm saying. I don't know what's happening here. Yeah, I'm trying to figure it out, and I'll let you know I cannot. One's like lasagna with french fries. That's what I'm saying. I don't know what's happening here. Yeah, I don't know. Uh-oh, but then there's Temple San. Temple San. Temple San. Oh, it's Temple San. It's sushi.

Okay. Oh. I would have liked Temple San, but, like, whatever. All right. Yeah, that's fine. Augusta. Yo, suddenly there's a lot of, like, meat and steak places. This is the place.

This is the place we go. I don't know how to say this. This is, what is this place? Churrosquera Nacional? It's a steakhouse. It's a steakhouse. But it looks delicious. That looks real good.

Oh, yeah. I want all the meats. And they got their logos, just a mustache, man. Yeah. Good logo. Oh, Station Blues. What is that? Oh, it's a blues bar.

Hell yeah. I'd go there. I'd probably get beat up by a bunch of Portuguese guys, though. You probably would. Yeah. A lot of these places, again, a lot of Europe, though You probably would Yeah a lot of these Places this again a lot Of Europe every time you look at a restaurant It looks the restaurant looks like it's in

Some guy's 15th century Home it really does But then they're also right next to Restaurants that look like it was built On the corner of a street Out of like garbage Containers and they put A bunch of nice chairs inside It's wild On the corner of a street out of, like, garbage containers. And they put a bunch of nice chairs inside.

It's wild. Here, look at this one. This is Cafe Mota. And it literally looks like it's just in someone's house or something. It really does. It looks like someone put a green screen wall in and called it a life. Yeah, but it's got 4.7 stars out of 5. I guess it's probably cheap and coffee. It's a win.

Cheap and coffee. Cheap and coffee. Pasteleria JP. They got more fries. Yeah, I'm looking at a place right next to Bomb Jesus and it looks just like... I'll let you know. This is probably the place I would go at 2 a.m. and be so satisfied.

This place looks like it's open 24-7. It's in the middle of nowhere, and all the food is just like meat and potato, meat and potato and rice. I would be so happy here. That looks like it's supposed to be like a little street corner shop or like one of those little kiosk type things where they cook. But it's like an actual building. What's crazy is all the food looks like something your mom would make. Like, look at this one dish. It just looks like rice on the side and then potatoes and meat with onions on it in like a casserole pan.

I'm not going to lie. I would eat there. Okay, this is weird. So look at this one, all right? It's a Burger King. Oh, boy. It has 2,000 reviews and four out of five stars. Like normally Burger Kings and stuff have like two stars.

Sure, but I'm looking at the burgers, stars. Like normally Burger King and stuff have like two stars. Sure. But I'm looking at the burgers and I'm looking at the food and it looks somehow it looks it doesn't look like crap. I don't know how that's possible.

Yeah. That's this might be like the best Burger King in the world. But it's also weird because I'm looking at a Burger King that clearly has a photo of a Big Mac. Yeah, I see that. That's definitely a Big Mac. Clearly a Big Mac. They're so good. They serve McDonald's there too.

Oh my gosh. Look at this picture I found at the Burger King. That's the creepiest. He's just like. All right. So, you know, you know, the the very famous meme of the guy talking to the girl, like the baseball game or at the party or whatever, except the girl is smiling to take a photo and the guy is like, I want you so badly.

Yeah, but he's also like... But just very close. Just like right up in her face. He's also like 40 years older than her. This is a weird... Yeah, the braces don't... The braces she has on don't do it. I'm not a fan of this.

He's like some 50-year-old guy. He's got like the chain on just like, yes. I didn't even notice the chain. What makes it even better is again this is just in a Burger King. It's a random photo taken in a Burger King. And not only that but then they uploaded it to the internet.

You're right. I do not understand. This is weird. Braga. We love it. And that's the weather. All right. Let's go to sports. Sports.

I'm going to tell you what. I've been watching a lot of women's soccer. It gets pretty crazy. Yeah. The women teams are great. Yeah. Currently, I don't know if they started. They're going to start like the knockout rounds now.

I'm pretty sure where it's like the best of 16 or eight or I don't know, however many. But I've been watching all the qualifier things. That was fun. It was always kind of sad when you watch like some of the countries that aren't very good go up against like the really good ones and they just get destroyed. Yeah. Like I think Japan beat like it was Costa, like, Zambia and stuff, like, six to nothing and, like, five to nothing.

You're like, all right, this is just sad. But then you see, like, it'd be fun when you'd have, like, the last place teams play each other because it was actually competitive and then, like, the good teams play each other. So I was watching a lot of that because I couldn't go on the computer and stare at a screen. So I stared at the TV. I'm trying to figure out what the – they're in different groups, right? Yeah.

And I know that the U.S. and the Netherlands were in a group together. Yeah. And I know that the U.S. is second to the Netherlands in that group. I don't know much else about that, but I know that the u.s is second to the netherlands in that group i don't know much else about that but i know that yeah i think it's there's eight divisions i think the top two from each division moved on so i think it's like switzerland norway australia nigeria japan spain england denmark netherlands u.s france jamaica sweden south africa columbia morocco Denmark, Netherlands, US, France, Jamaica, Sweden, South Africa, Colombia, Morocco.

Gotcha, gotcha. And then some of them, they're just, I think, like, the United States kind of suck. And they, like, tied, but they almost lost. And if they would have lost, I think Portugal would have made it instead of them. Interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because they got two ties? Yeah, they got two ties?

Yeah, they got two ties. That's not good. You don't want that. Yeah, that's not good. So yeah, I think all those games start now. All the knockout games where they actually lose and they're sent home begin. So the playoffs, essentially. Playoffs?

Who's the best team right now? The best team would be, let's see, who's the best team right now? The best team would be, let's see who had the most points. It's one of the Nordic countries. Japan and England were at nine, Sweden, nine. Oh, I guess Sweden. And Sweden's who America plays next, right? Yeah. So that's not good for them. Great. Cool. Yeah. I mean, well, you know what? The women's Yeah, so that's not good for them. Great. Cool.

Yeah, I mean, well, you know what? The women's team, the American women's team is great. So if I have faith that they can win. But they also have won so many years that maybe they're just, like, getting up there. And maybe there's hungry other teams looking to take it. Honestly, I thought Japan was fun. They're just, like, they're, like like undersized, but they're just fast.

And they're just like so... They're so fast and like tactile, they're just like, Oh my god, how are they going at this speed and making the plays that they're making? I was like, dude, this shit's crazy. Now you're making me Google the Japanese team. They're just... It was insane how fast they were i was like this this is wild because then like you had uh sweden which was just they're just tall blonde women they're like towering over everyone you're like all right yeah they're just tall oh wow yeah i'm looking at the photos of uh the japanese team and you're like oh yeah no they're they're pretty normal size

and then you see the comparison of shots where they're, like, trying to steal the ball from someone else. And it's like these giants running down the field. Wow, that's crazy. It felt like I was watching, like, Mario soccer. They're like Toads. It's the team of Toads. They're just so fast.

You can't stop them. Yeah, I'm looking at all these photos from the matches and yeah size wise some of the other teams are nope never mind nope there's a lot of them are just much taller just much taller wow i like it i'm here for it yeah like straight up the like sweden and they're like they're like six foot six and shit they're like insane uh so yeah it's it's been fun watching that and i'll probably keep watching it till it's over uh yeah yeah and then baseball we had a bunch of trades happen we're into the final stretch of baseball season finally when it starts mattering uh we got the orioles in first go Orioles uh Twins in first the Rangers in first of their

division the Braves the Brewers and the Dodgers and uh wild card we also got the Rays and the Astros and the Blue Jays and the wild card and then the Giants Phill Reds, but that will change most likely as the season goes on. And we also had our first NFL preseason game where the Cleveland Browns beat the New York Jets in a game that means nothing. So, yay.

Yeah. And that's sports. All right. What is our fact of the day? Fact of the day. The largest snowflake was bigger than most pizzas. Okay, yes. I assume they're 12 inches.

Is that what they're talking about? I think so. According to the Guinness World Record, a snowflake fell in Montana, which measured 15 inches wide and 8 inches deep. Yo, that's a big-ass snowflake. That is a big-ass snowflake. It happened in 1887. I don't trust it.

No photos, no nothing. That's true. You'd think they would have photos or some documented evidence. Probably some dude drew it. Yeah, he's probably like, I saw a snowflake this big. It's got to be true. It's Old Man Jenkins. Yeah, I don't know.

I'm looking, trying to see where one could be, but I don't see any photos of anything that could be one. Yeah, I don't know. It's got to just be from Old Man Jenkins, and you're going off what he said. It was 30 feet wide, it talked its name was frosty Imagine you really did see that though. That'd be kind of crazy. Nobody believed them the aliens dude It was a ship it was and out of it stepped three little cold men They said fight the snowman

So I did. To the death. And I killed him. I beat him up. I saved the earth that day cause it was a me that the aliens didn't invade. That's that guy in the car's sources.

Yeah. That's also your fact of the day. All right. I don't know if it's a fact. What? What is our big news story of the day? This is one of the biggest news stories we've had in a while. Fort Myers Chipotle goes viral with Yelp reviews about employee named Lucy stealing married men.

Yes. Now this is a news story. Yeah. myers chipotle is now famous for more than just burritos according to numerous yelp reviews there's a husband stealing employee named lucy who works there the chipotle in question is just one uh or is the one on 41 just north of college fort myers florida the yelp accusation started about a month ago with reviews such as don't send your husbands here to pick up chipotle next thing you know lucy's gonna seduce him into sleeping her like she has with multiple married men yo stop this is not just like one woman getting her friends to harass lucy online this is lucy just up there stealing up men I don't know uh then there was Lucy is a

pig she slept with my husband too they need to get better customer service that doesn't involve my bed the guac sucks too this can't be real you don't write the guac sucks too after your husband the guac sucks too another read Lucy the GM or whatever position she's in, likes to sleep with married men, a.k.a. her customers. This can't be real. I'm looking at photos of it right now. Yeah. And it's actually really funny. I'm looking at it's a tweet.

And this person posted stuff about the Chipotle, right? Yeah. It says, apparently there's some controversy at my local Chipotle. The problem is that the people – so this says, don't send your husbands here to pick up Chipotle. Like the stuff you read, right? Right. This is written by Evan K. Yeah.

The other one is written by Jake W. Jake W, yeah. And the other one is written by jake w w yeah and the other one's written by jessica f but the best part is the follow-up tweet is can i get lucy's phone number i think she's a great member that's from david hell yes david i was thinking the same thing like hook me up with lucy yeah the thing is like and it looks like those accounts don't have like they have like one or two other posts that's it so it has to be them just like harassing lucy or like maybe their i have no it has to be like a like yeah her friends being like and then she's like guys stop

that's this is like there's no way that's that can't be real there's like what are they gonna do go to a chipotle and she's just like there's no way that's that can't be real there's like what are they gonna do go to a chipotle and she's just like hey yeah every time you go to chipotle they're like they're going crazy there they're just like all right yeah okay next in line yeah okay next like they're just constantly busy they're pumping orders out they don't got time got time for that what's crazy is all of the reviews now. So if you go to the website for the Fort Myers Chipotle, it says this business is being monitored by Yelp's support team

for content-related media reports. And if you scroll down, all the reviews are like, she was the one asking for double meat. Oh, God. like she was the one asking for double meat. Oh, God. Oh, yeah. Unusual activity alert. Yeah.

It definitely says there's a bunch of pop-ups that are like unusual activity. I thought this place was a Hooters after meeting Lucy. Either way, service was up to par. Outstanding service. Lucy knows her way around a big burrito. I can't wait to eat there again. Why is this happening? Someone said I was in here the other day and Lucy didn't try and seduce

me. Unfair. I mean, in all honesty, I wasn't wearing a ring, but still. One out of five stars oh my god yeah most of these are like lucy has a way with burritos or lucy added a special sizzle to my steak burrito this is ridiculous yeah also one of the people, the Evan K. one, is from DeKalb, Illinois. Yeah, these are just people trolling now. This is just the internet internetting. But it's, I can't figure out why. Yeah, all of a sudden it started.

Wow. Yeah, this is. Although, dude, Carlos said you walk in and the first thing they do is laugh so disrespectful that's a serious review he doesn't care about lucy he's just getting laughed at for something what's crazy is that a lot of these there's a lot of one-star reviews that started before the lucy bit yeah a lot of one-star reviews this a lot of, like, they got the order wrong, the burrito was made incorrectly. Yeah, wow. A lot of people, you walk in and the first thing they do is laugh.

So disrespectful. Yeah, that guy. Why? What the hell? Why so many one-star reviews out of nowhere? I don't know. Rude staff. Rude staff. Very slow service. Rude staff. Rude staff. Very slow service. Rude staff.

Extremely disappointed. Rude staff. Out of stake. Manager is awful. She treats employees bad. Location isn't worth your time. Stingy with the amount of rice. Waited 15 minutes watching four girls prep. Only one girl serving.

Yo, there's so many one-star reviews before even Lucy started. Wow, a lot of these reviews are like, this place sucks. That's why Lucy started seducing people. I guess. You gotta get them to come back. Yeah, they're getting no business. Oh my, so

many versions of standing here, two employees made eye contact, no one greeted us or acknowledge us crazy yeah oh my god i'm not one to complain but my girlfriend and i were waiting over an hour for two bowls how how see that's what happened they saw you had a girlfriend they're like nope it checks out this person said they ordered 81 in food Which I think is too much for Chipotle Yeah that is It's like you're going to a restaurant

A real restaurant Terrible service Absolutely terrible service So many one star reviews Wow The amount of one star reviews It's the highest one star reviews Period

Maybe just Fort Myers sucks though I, because I would believe that. I would also believe that, yeah. That would not surprise me. Looking at other Fort Myers things, a lot of three-star restaurants with a lot of one-star reviews. Oh, yeah. So, I mean, it checks out. I believe Fort Myers sucks.

You don't have to convince me of that. Yeah. Much like Lucy. Hey! Perfect. There it is. That's your new story. All right.

That's it for us. Thanks so much for listening or watching. I've enjoyed this podcast. Crenndor, hit them with socials. We got socials, youtube.com slash cox and Crenndor podcast. Subscribe, hit the bell uh all that stuff leave a weather request you can see all the podcasts uploaded over there be notified about them yeehaw uh we also got the animations over on youtube.com slash cox and crendor

we also have our own things youtube.com jess cox if you like news youtube.com slash crendor if you like if you like news if you like top 10 lists about random stuff and wow Twitch TV Jesse Cox if you like watching you loot stuff in Baldur's Gate hell yeah brother Twitch TV Crendor if you like me doing literally nothing

we got Instagram Notorious Cox Instagram Crendor was taken just posted a picture of me at the library. We got Twitter, Jessica, or X, we got X, Crandor. Jesse Cox.

Yep, that was dumb. And TikTok, Jesse Cox, TikTok, TikTok, Crandor. Good talks all around. That's it. All right. That's it for us we'll see y'all next time and as always

to be continued