Cox n' Crendor Show - Episode 422 - Monkey Mayhem

Episode Date: April 15, 2024

Come see Cox n' Crendor Live! https://t.co/EeWQDuVDe1 The boys are back and this time Jesse is recovering from partying a bit too hard. Although it was less of a party and more of a challenge. Meanwhile Crendor meets a man who LOVES his steak. And then Omega Mart because that's all Jesse and talk about these days. That and MONKEY MAYHEM all on a brand new Cox n' Crendor! Go to http://dragonsdogma.com to buy the game and start your epic quest today.

Today's episode is brought to you by Dragon's Dogma 2. Play it today, get lost with your pawns as they throw themselves from cliffs or something. We'll talk about that later. Now let's jump into this podcast. Hello everybody, it's time for Ghost on Treadmill. This is Treadmill in the morning. In the morning. Broadcasting live, live, live, live, everybody.

Welcome to another episode of Cox and Credo in the morning. Yep. Nice Doppler. I like that. Pretty good. It was going high. Then I was like, maybe we go low. Then it just, it's, it's, it was all over the place.

You reminded me again of, I don't know if you've seen the show Shogun yet. By the way, very good. Incredibly good show. There's one character on that show. So there's different ways to watch it. I think you can watch it with dubs or subs or whatever. But if you watch subtitles, there's the subtitles that are Japanese that are there specifically for if you're watching without normal subtitles. Boy, there's a lot of subtitle conversation happening.

But, you know, there's like normal subtitles and then there's the in actual episode subtitles. Boy, there's a lot of subtitle conversation happening. But you know, there's like normal subtitles and then there's the in actual episode subtitles. And so if you're watching with actual episode subtitles on and the subtitles you can just turn on through the TV, there's one character who

even though he's speaking in Japanese, whenever he makes a noise, English subtitles it and it's really funny. He'll be like, and then the bottom will be like, oh, what? I'm like, this is amazing. It reminds me of the noises you make, where you're just like, and you remind me of that guy. At least I'm reminding you of somebody you truly are proud of and care of. I love that dude.

He's a bad man. He's not a good guy. Right. He's not a great guy, but the noises he makes are hilarious. As an actor, love this man. Love him. Yeah. I think I'm mainly known for my noises at this point.

There's one noise. When you get scared, you go like, You make a noise. You're like, Yeah, that's the one. Yep, yep. There's one noise that when you get scared, you go like, gah! You make a noise. You're like, gah! Yeah, that's the one. Gah! Yep, yep, that's it. That's what you're known for.

I thought I was known for the wah. The wah's pretty good, but the noise you make when you get scared, it's not even, I don't think we've even made it yet. It's like a gah! It's like that kind of noise. Yeah, maybe it's because I'm not scared. That's to be a natural reaction. But I last heard it when we were streaming this past week.

And it's been in my head because it's one of the funniest noises you make. It's like, you sound like Goofy, kind of. You're like, go, go. Yeah. Yeah, we played that content game and it's content warning yeah content war it was a good time sam and dodger yeah fun game it is exactly what the youtube experience is just with monsters but it's the exact same thing there's no difference whatsoever yeah just walking around Actual, just like bad things are happening.

You're just like, hold on, I gotta film this. Yeah. There's a great bit when you lose, and it's like, your life is a failure. You fade into obscurity. I was like, God, this really isn't true. This sucks. It's its home.

Yeah, it was great. Apparently, I didn't know my microphone was that loud dude your microphone was so loud which is crazy because it said it's normal this is how i have it like how you're hearing it now so i don't know why the game like boosted it times 100 i don't know i mean i guess it's because it was an in-game feature and you know sometimes those those are janks sometimes i have no clue. That's got to be it. But that was fun.

I meant to ask Dodger about microwaving waffles. But I'll save that. What? What? What? I'll save that for the Geekenders next week. Some will be on next week. Oh, boy.

That's true. You are. Sam. All right. Sam Strippen, as we know uh he talked about how he made clark a waffle for breakfast and she was like uh it lacks moisture and then i was like well you know you probably didn't make it well enough right i said he probably didn't do the light butter syrup glaze to retain the moisture whoa whoa of the waffle yeah just call him out so then i went on hold on you're talking about

homemade waffles right well i don't know he just said are you are you saying but i'm talking about you personally no i'm just making fun of him okay all right so all right so i thought you were like i go to the grocery store i buy eggos and i put a nice glaze on the ego to make sure it returned like that frozen ass ego you're doing to be fair that is a great way to to spice up an ego i mean i guess you're right but it feels like a waste i don't know at the here's, here's the thing. We're missing the point. So then he was like, when Dodger makes waffles, he thinks that she microwaves them to keep them moist or soggy. And I was like, who microwaves waffles? So now I have to know.

Yeah, she'll tell us. She'll tell us what's up. You know she'll spin a story. She'll be like, oh, yeah, what I do. And then we'll hear some long convoluted thing about how, like, down on the farm, this is how they used to make them. My pappy used to microwave them for all the kids. I don't think I've ever heard you use the word my pappy, but, you know. My pappy.

When she grows her old, long, white beard. My pappy, oh, boy. Yeah. Yeah, so I need the no-no. All right. I've never heard of a microwave waffle, but Sam was like, yeah, I think she microwaves them. Which is also funny that he doesn't know. Yeah, you would think that, so years ago when I was in the UK, I was at some hotel.

I don't remember what it was, but they had a toaster. And that toaster was the best toaster I ever used in my entire life. Every day for breakfast, whatever piece of bread I put in there, the outside would be crusty, but the inside would still be moist. I was like, what is this amazing toaster? And I found that it's like a British company that hand makes all their toasters. And they've been doing it for longer than I've been alive. And I went online and ordered one. I was like, this is the best toaster.

It's in my home. It doesn't have a pop-up feature. It's like an old school, you've got to lift it up and get the thing out. It's great. I love this toaster. It's amazing. Here's the thing. It's British.

I figure this is like a British thing. They certainly should have it. Right? I don't know. Here's the thing. It's British. I figure this is like a British thing. They certainly should have it, right? I don't know. You would figure that in their household they would have an awesome toaster. But maybe they have like one of those, you know, $1.50 Amazon toasters. Like, look, it makes the bread hot. I have no clue.

That's the thing. You got to find the right toaster. Even though they are in the country with this awesome toaster, they probably haven't located it. Yeah, it is not a fancy toaster at all. It is like a stainless steel monster. But it does the thing it does, and it does it well, and I love it. Bagels, English muffins, breads, anything. It does it so well, And I have no idea why. Don't know how it works.

I don't know the difference. I don't know what makes this toast things different than other things. No explanations for you, but I know it does what it does. And I'm like, I love this thing. I like to think there's just some British man that was just like, all the toasters suck. And he's like, I'm going to make the best. He just devoted his life to like figuring out the toaster addict formula. And then he just going to make the best toast. He just devoted his life to figuring out the toaster addict formula. And then he just figured out the best way.

He's like, this is how you toast it. The outside. The inside's perfect. And then everyone's like, this guy's crazy. And he's like, no. And he just made his toaster. Brand is Doolit. Dwallit?

I don't know how to pronounce this. D-U-A-L-I-T. Oh, I see. Doolit? Doolit? Yeah. Oh, I see. Dualit? Yeah. Oh, yeah, that does look like an old-timey toaster. Yeah, yeah, and it's straight up just, like, so simple to use, and it has no fancy features at all.

At all. But it makes the perfect bread. It almost looks like an espresso machine, some of these. I don't know if that's the fancier one. So if you look at it, the best way to describe it would be there's two dials on the side. One's the timer, and one is, is it a bagel? Do you want to just toast one side of the bread, or do you want one thing to work, or do you want both of the slots to work? Or if you get a four-one, you can do it up to four.

So that's it. You can choose which of the heat things turns on and how long you want them to turn on, and that's it. Underneath it is the tray to catch all the bread droppings, and then there's a knob, and the knob lowers and raises where the bread is inside the thing. That's it. There's no fancy beeps or boops. It's all mechanical. I feel like we've hit a point where there's too many beeps and boops and everything oh 100 agreed everyone was like dude you check out this toaster

i know you like toast and it was that one that where the entire front of it is a monitor and you like program in what toast you want i was like y'all this looks like it would be something i would love but let me tell you i do not love this this to me is the most over-the-top Nonsensical thing I've ever seen yeah, you don't need it. Yeah, just there to be there It's like it's like how the internets everywhere. It's like I don't need internet in my poster I don't need internet my refrigerator all right. I just Now it used to even like back in 2010 It was like that was like a super rare thing be oh, this millionaire has like a screen in his refrigerator. It was like the only person that has it.

Now you can go to Best Buy or like the whatever store and you can buy one. Everybody's got it. I hate it. Well, I'm a little bit jealous when I talk with friends who are like, I wake up in the morning, press a button, and my shower turns on. I'm like, okay, that's cool. Like that sounds like the future, but it's not something i need and i think i've hit the point in my life where if it's cool technology and it's something i need i'm in but if it's cool technology for the sake of just being cool technology i'm like i it's the reason why i used to be all about getting a new phone and now

i still my phone continues to just get old i'm like like, I don't, I don't, there was a dream once these phones would be better. And all it is, is you're like incrementally making it slightly better and it serves no purpose for me. So why do I literally, I get messages from my phone company because Verizon has like a new every two thing. And every two years they're like, Hey, get a new phone on us. If you give us your old phone. And I'm like, I used to do that all the time.

Now it's been a year and a half and they still message me like, please, turn on your phone. We would love to give you a new phone. The only reason why I think I might get a new phone is I think that Apple now has to do USB-C. And that makes charging and doing everything so much easier. So I might – that might be the thing that pushes me over. But right now I'm like, nah, I barely use this damn thing as is. I don't know. And so when people talk about – like my bed.

My bed is a future bed. It's got so many app things I can use with it and it like – you can change how tough it is. It's amazing. It has under lighting. You can make your feet is. It's amazing. It has under lighting. You can make your feet warm. It's great. But I justify this future tech because I absolutely use that bed all the time.

And it's the best thing I've ever owned besides this toaster. It's like I see you can change how tough it is. I just picture your bed being like, come on into bed or being like, yeah, you want to get into bed, you little bitch? Fight me. It's like, whoa, I put it way way too tough there's definitely way too tough you sleep on it it's like a brick and you're like whoa that's but then if you want you can have it so it's like a brick but then it also conforms to your body so it's tough but then also a little soft and i'm like oh and it punches you in your sleep it's so tough how i like my ladies, punching me in my sleep.

It's like, wow, this mattress is massaging my back. It's just like, ugh. Get off of me. Get out of here. Yeah. I got it on the New Yorker setting. That's not good. Hey, get out of here, you.

Yeah. Yeah, there's too much, too many options my phone too that's what i was gonna say i have the iphone 10 or whatever is the x that phone is like six or seven years old now and it's still going and i tried getting a new i think i tried getting the iphone like 13 or 14 and i compared the cameras and i was like i think my camera on the 10 is better and I was sending pictures to people they're like yeah I think that's the the new one and I was like that's my old one and they're like oh yeah and so I just kept it and it's still going that's that's the thing I don't really like using it that much it's like I mainly the primary thing I use it for

is like listening to music at the gym sure or like checking email like i'm not playing games or anything on it i don't um i'm not a big game although i almost got got dude i'm not gonna lie i'm not ashamed to admit this i was on reddit and a post for some mobile game popped up and the entire thing was like anime boob girls and i was like should i get should i get this game you don't need this, Jesse. But the ad, I was like, but she's so hot. Oh, my God. You old pervert.

What are we doing here? You got it. You know what? We got to move on. Why are we looking at this? It's just a drawing, dude. It's just a drawing. It's probably a game Sam's played for like 80 hours.

Yeah. 100%. I was like, it's just going to be a thing where it's like, you know, spend money to roll for a random five star girl. I was like, that seems stupid. I was like, Jesse, no, no. Mental clarity, boy. And I was like, all right, we're good. All right.

But it almost got me. And I do not play mobile games at all. But I was like, I don't know, dude. Look at that jiggle physics. Oh, Jesse, no. Yeah. Dude, the ads, they either got jiggle physics and they're just know, dude. Look at that jiggle physics. Oh, Jesse, no! Dude, the ads, they either got jiggle physics and they're just like, hey, or they got like the crazy ads where it's just like somebody playing The Sims.

They like walk into a house, a zombie pops out, and it's like, uh-oh, the zombie's in a bikini. And then they like cut their head off and it like rolls down the street and then like some guy picks it up and like goes bowling with it and they're just like, it's like the craziest shit. And you're like, what is happening? The only two I see are the ones where it's like a top down look of a dude trying to survive a wave of zombies. Right. And the player always sucks bad enough to get killed at the end. It's like, can you do better?

I'm like, what game is this? And it's like, Ebony. I'm like, Ebony? The castle building sim? What? The Ebony from 20 years ago sim? It's like the ones that was like, save me master.

And it was like a sexy lady. And you're like, that's not even in the game! So, it's either pure lies or there's this one thing that I don't know what game this is for, but I always watch the ads because they're so insane where it's like a muscle bound dude and he's like, has a sword and he's like walking off and there's like a sexy lady and she's like, save me. And he's like, I'll save you.

And he walks over and then a monster comes up and eats him. And then he gets pooped out into a top down map where he has to go around fighting guys in order to get back to the lady. But the monster stole all his armor. So he's naked. And I'm like, what is this game? I just remember growing up, and there was no free games. And all the free games there were were the most bare-bones,

janky-ass free games. You're just like, is this even a game? You walk around in an open field, and there's a random Skyrim character. And you're like, what even is this even a game like walk around in an open field they're just like here's like random skyrim character and you're like what and that was it yeah league came around league genuinely did change a lot and i everyone wants to give it a hard time but league is essentially the world of warcraft of its sort of generation where wow changed the way people made games, and then League came along and was like, no one wants to play MMORPGs anymore, they want to play

quick in-and-out MMO competition games. And then that changed a bunch of stuff. And, you know, those things happen every ten years or so. I'm sure in the next two or three years, the next big thing will happen and we'll all be sucked into that. Well, we had the Battle Royale phase. True! Which I still. We had the Battle Royale phase.

True. Which I still love. I love Battle Royales. Battle Royale was kind of in between WoW because Battle Royale can take a long, long time. Yeah, it depends. I loved it because it was a podcast game. You would just sit at the edge. Yeah, you're right.

That was like 2017, I want to say. That's when PUBG took off. So, I mean, I guess it would be 2004 would be World of Warcraft coming in and changing stuff. Just like how 97 would probably be EverQuest coming in and changing the online space. And then I hope 97 was EverQuest. If it's earlier than that. If it's later, I'm even more shocked. 2000 was kind of like RTS games, too.

It was like StarCraft. But I think RTSs were the 90s and StarCraft was kind of the last big hurrah because after that they fell off fast. Yeah. Actually, they fell off around WoW's time. Yeah, yeah. I mean, if Blizzard does anything, it's cannibalized

their own audience. They've been doing that for years. And then you have, when did League of Legends come out? It was like 2009, I want to say. Because I was playing the beta in like 2009-ish. Because I remember. Yeah, 2009. Yeah. I remember playing the beta in 2008.

Because I was playing Wrath of the Lich King. And that's how I remember playing the beta in 2008 because I was playing Wrath of the Lich King. And that's how I remember. Gotcha. One of the guild members I had was like, dude, I'm playing this new game called League of Legends. And it's like Dota. And I was like, what? And then I played it. And that was it.

They had Defense of the Ancients. And then a bunch of different things came out. Heroes of New Earth. I did a voice in Heroes of New Earth. Oh, wow. And so they have. Yeah. Literally, I played the character that was a ripoff of Link from the Legend of Zelda TV show.

So I got to be like, excuse me, princess. It was great. The 2009, so I guess I was reversed. I was reversed in my timeline. So it's WoW, then League, then Fortnite. Yeah. Are the big game changers I mean PUBG I think was the start of it

But just how there were other MMORPGs before WoW That were huge It wasn't until WoW happened that it really took off In that genre, same with League Because there was Dota 2, there were other things And then Even Dota existed in

Warcraft 3, so like it existed And then, I mean, even Dota existed in Warcraft 3. So, like, it existed. And then that blew up with League. And then I think Fortnite took that genre of battle royale to another level. Yeah. It was, which is wild, because it was just like some tower defense game. And then everyone was like, yeah, it was okay. And then they were like, we're going to copy PUBG.

And PUBG was like, you can't do that. And then everyone was like, yo, this was okay. And then they were like, we're going to copy PUBG. And PUBG was like, you can't do that. And then everyone was like, yo, this is crazy. And then everyone played Fortnite instead. It genuinely surprises me. I have a flag in Fortnite from before it was a PUBG thing. Yeah. When it was just a normal game, which is crazy to me. And then they completely changed it.

Yeah. I can't believe it flipped and blew up. They were just like, we'll just add this game mode in, and then that became the game. Yeah. It was crazy. I typed in top 10 trends

that will rule the gaming universe from 2024. This is in eddie.com. Insights for experts. Oh, boy. Okay, here we go. You ready for this? Yep.

The trends for gaming. They're going to change everything. First, number one, AR and VR gaming. I don't know if that's true. I don't know if that's true. I feel like every game that releases on either AR or VR is not talked about like a week after it comes out. The technology isn't cheap enough for everyone to adopt. It isn't good enough for everyone to use.

Sure. All right. Yeah, that'll happen one day maybe. All right. Generative AI in gaming. Well, I'm sure the industry will love that. I don't know if the players will. But, you know, whatever. Whatever works.

It'll happen. Competitive multiplayer gaming. Mobile gaming. Boy, they try that all the time. I don't know if that's going to happen. With esports turning into a global phenomenon and rapid popularity of games like PUBG

Mobile. Maybe we're not in that space. I mean, mobile games are huge, but competitive multiplayer mobile? I still don't think it's that big, if I had to guess. I mean, maybe it's big as in money-making, when people buy a lot of stuff.

That's probably what they're thinking of, yeah. I mean, it's gotta be. I mean, there's... It's like sports. There's like all the sports games people pay to get the card packs and everything in those. Sure. I think it's more like if I did Twitchify it, you know how there's certain streamers who have maybe, like if you see a streamer who has a thousand people watching, right? Right.

And you're like, wow, they must be doing great. But then you see a streamer who has like 200 people watching, but all 200 sub every month and all 200 give money and stuff. They're just doing better financially than the person with, you know, uh, five times more viewers. And I feel like that's competitive multiplayer mobile gaming where they

have less people overall using them, but more people spending a ton of money. So you're not going to have huge tournaments, but if you're invested in it, you're probably making bank. Yeah. No, that's true. I see plenty of people. They're in the thousands of viewers, and they have a couple hundred subs more than

me, and I'm like, what? I have a sixteenth of your audience and we're the same subs, which is kind of insane, but I guess it makes sense because a lot of our viewers are also older and have jobs. Right. And it's entertainment.

Yeah. And it's entertainment. And I actually understand it now. I used to not get it before, but now I watch a lot of, first off, you sucking at Kaizo or Mario or whatever that is. Not Mario Kart. It's not Mario. Pokemon.

To be fair, I suck at all games. But Pokemon is what I meant. Why did kaizo mario the pokemon uh you're terrible at that it's great i love watching it and uh octo playing through ball taro balarto whatever that game is yeah but i was i was kind of close um playing through that i love watching that because i'm like wow that's so neat i would not i would not play this game at all but it's fun watching other people play um yeah i get it i kind of get it now i've been doing it a lot lately yeah i mean i have plenty of people i'll watch and just be like whoa like neat i mean that's kind of like i played bellatro for i have 22 hours played

because that's all i played when i had a cold and I could like barely stream I was just like okay I play this uh but that's how I feel with the the opposite like you'll play a story game I'm like I'd never play this but I could watch you play it um so this is completely off topic but I have to bring it up because I wrote it down it's a very important story okay so I got I've been getting physical therapy again but now for my hips and knees because I started getting some hip and knee pain I was like I'm going physical therapy I ain't messing around so I've been doing some how do you how did you get hip and knee pain uh I think a combination of sitting my whole life well I don't sit as much anymore, but, you know, it still adds up. And then, you know, I still do leg exercises.

So that probably puts some wear on me, especially if I'm not doing proper posture, which I think is a lot of the time is what contributes. Yeah. So now I've been doing more of those just like little exercises they've been given. It's been helpful, but it's besides the point. So I go in for physical therapy therapy therapy and uh i sit down and then i'm waiting for my physical therapist to come out and be like hey come on in and this old man comes in who looks like wilfred brimley love that he's just he's walking with his walker and he sits down and he looks at the tv that's on and he's like, outback, I think they're closing all the outbacks. And I was like, I don't know.

I saw an outback just open like over here. And he's like, I don't know the one by me closed. And some other old lady's like, I know the one you're talking about. They closed because they moved. And he's like, that's good. I love their skirt steak. Love that skirt steak. You know, for a brief moment, I was about to be like, maybe this man's right.

They should close all the Outbacks. They're terrible. And he's like, I love their skirt steak. And then he's like, you know who else has a good skirt steak? There's this local place. It's called like Goobies. And they, oh man, fresh green beans. I don't know.

He said something. It was not Goobies, but I'm just saying Goobies and they oh man fresh green beans i don't know he said something it was not goobies but i'm just saying goobies he's like they got a fresh green bean side they got mashed potato and a great skirt steak it's like 20 bucks but man it's good and i was like yeah you're just you're paying for the quality he's like that's right pay for the quality then i was like why do you get skirt steak and he's like it's the juiciest that's the oh it's the juiciest i'll tell you i like in his mind that he was just like how does the guy know it's the juiciest and i was like oh okay and then right after that my physical therapist came out she was like hey come on in he goes good luck and then i was like yeah and then she's like oh i see you were uh talking to the the people here and i was like yep i was and she's like we

got some interesting folks the juiciest so i wrote that right that dad i just said skirt steak guy well i like skirt steak guy i think uh he's my favorite of the guys. It reminds me that I read an article about, oh, not Outback, Roadhouse? Longhorn? Texas Roadhouse. Texas Roadhouse. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Apparently, Texas Roadhouse instituted some form of new macaroni and cheese. Before, it was packaged.

Right. Now they are making fresh macaroni and cheese in-house. But here's the thing. They haven't really instructed them, according to the internet, on how to make it correctly. And every store needs to learn how to make it. The thing is, they're doing it on the job. So people are getting some of the most messed up I saw one where it was just a bowl of noodles

with like an ooze of cheese sauce over it. They're like they didn't even mix it y'all. They didn't mix it. It's so funny and there's a bunch of people who work there that are just like yeah it's a learning process. When you get it you get it but it takes

a while. I don't know why they didn't train anyone on this I'm like why didn't they they just said we're gonna make a different mac and cheese which again makes me think oh god what was the quality of the food there before yeah it's like when you find out Subway's like we're finally

using real bread and you're like wait what yeah I always whenever they're like I use real this I'm like wait what what was i eating like subway is like the biggest like most egregious version where they're like our turkey is now 100 turkey and you're like wait what what was it before what was i eating when i was like 15 years old what the hell is what do you mean yeah yeah it's there's a few places like that but yeah subway definitely does it a lot um not a fan speaking of uh eating food i don't know this has nothing to do with it i really just wanted to hear your story about you getting too high

man i had a whole other story too i went to Omega Mart, it was great It was so much fun Omega Mart? Yeah, I'll tell you that after this story, I guess So, last night I was hanging out with a friend Just like having a conversation And she was like, yeah, I don't really get high And I was like, explain

What does that mean? I mean, like, you choose not to? Or when you try, because, you know, it's California. Everyone's like, I'll try it. I'm like, when you try something, you just don't feel it. She was like, I don't feel it. I was like, well, how much? And she goes, oh, a lot.

I'm like, what do you mean a lot? She's like, a lot. I was like, okay. So that goes on. We're hanging out. And I was like, yo, do you want to go up the street And like get an edible something Because I guarantee you're just smoking like

Jank grass that some guy named Stevie got you I was like let's go to like the actual store So we go to the store And as soon as we walk in We see a lemonade thing Like a I don't know like a What do you imagine A single 20 ounce thing of lemonade, except it's like with weed.

And I was like, all right, this is the vibe. We'll get that instead of like drinking alcohol. We'll drink this through the night and we'll just like pour little shots for each other and we'll drink it and it'll be a whole thing and we'll just like get dinner. I was like, this will be fun. So that's our plan. We're drinking this thing. Now in my mind, I'm like, okay, be fun. So that's our plan. We're drinking this thing. Now, in my mind, I'm like, okay, it's one bottle, right?

So it's probably designed for one person to drink through the night, right? Because there's other things like cans of stuff that, you know. What I didn't realize is this is like the primo stuff. This is like you should be drinking this through the week cutting by oh boy so i uh i drink i drink some she drinks some we're sitting there we're like eating dinner we're talking and then uh i don't know at some point we're done with the bottle. And everything's fine. I feel totally fine. Right? And I don't know what time it was.

Maybe like 8 p.m. By the way, this was like an all-day vibe. This was like a hangout day. Right? And so it's like 8 p.m. It's not even late. It's like 8 p.m. I am sitting there holding onto my couch.

The world is spinning. I'm like, I don't feel well at all. She's like, I feel fine. Are you okay? I'm like, no, I'm not okay. This feels, this is, I'm like, how are you fine? You are made of paper mache and twigs. How are you still fine?

She's like, I don't, I'm, I'm all right. Everything, you know, I feel it, but like, I'm fine. I'm like, I don't know what's going on right now, but my feet feel like they're across the room. So she like puts her hand on my arm. And to give you an example of what it felt like, it felt like her hand went into my arm and was like inside my body. And I was like, just leave your hand in there.

Just leave it in there. It's nice to feel another human's touch. Just leave it there. Just leave it there. And I was like, oh, boy. Oh, boy. Then I go over to the sink and I'm trying to get water. But the water, I'm like, if I drink water, I'm going to get queasy.

And I don't want to get queasy because I don't want to like, oh, who wants to see their friend oh who wants to see their friend get sick like no Jesse no so I go and I sit in my computer chair and I realize like I'm slowly slumping into it and she's like are you okay I'm like yeah no I'm fine she's like you need anything I was like need you to have a good night I need you to be good just don't I'm fine I'm fine are you sure you're okay I'm like yeah to be good. Just don't. It's fine. It's fine. Are you sure you're okay? I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Meanwhile, I don't know if she could hear it, but I was breathing like, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.

It felt so loud. I was like, oh, I had way too much. Oh, boy. I screwed up. So eventually I go to bed and I'm like okay jesse you're fine bud you're fine bud it's okay bud and as i'm laying there in bed i pull out my phone and i proceed this is how i knew i was too high i finally was coming down from feeling like crazy because i was lying down and like you know i was like all and like, you know, I was like, all right, I'm vibing now.

I'm feeling it. All right. But I turned on my phone and I went to Reddit and there was a post about a man trying to make like either dumplings or some type of pasta with a pasta machine. But it would not work. And it kept failing and kept happening over and over and over and over again no matter what he did to make it work it would keep failing i don't know how long the video was it felt like it was 12 hours i watched all of it i watched this man fail at making dumplings the entire night then when that was over i went on youtube and i watched some guy's hour and 42 minute

uh video about what comedy is. What? And it was definitely one of those videos where the guy was like, every third word, using a word he heard once in college that he definitely doesn't really know what it means. He's like, comedy is the sensation relaxation. I'm like, what? What is happening?

He's like, vis-a-vis, it went on for an hour, four, two minutes. I was like, yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. It is lived experience. And it can't be funny if you're just saying something and not. I was like in it, dude. I was in it.

And then when that ended, I watched some guys like hour long rant about the cyber truck and how what a piece of shit it is. And he was just like, the doors are so sharp it can cut carrots. I was just like, yeah, look at this stupid thing. And so then I woke up and I woke up at exactly 30 minutes before we decided to do this. And I came here and I'm going to let you know, I'm still a little bit in that zone. How much was in that drink? I don't know. I threw away the bottle.

But I guarantee it was more than I should have had. It was a lot. It had to have been at minimum what i drank 30 milligrams something something high something really high like it's probably like everything i looked up here is like all these drinks have like a hundred yeah so i definitely probably screwed up yeah me when i uh when i take something one to two milligram whatever I had it was too much but I just wanted to point out for the record she was fine totally fine

I heard there's some people they process it they can't process the chemical or whatever the shit it is so they don't really get it or it takes a bunch to even feel anything so that's probably what she has I mean she was just sitting there I'm telling you she was at one point she fell asleep i could hear her snoring and i was just

like i thought she was going through some shit i looked over because i was making noises with my mouth like and i and i and i hear this like next to me. And I think, okay, she's going through shit too. I open my already like just destroyed eyes as I can barely open them. And I look over. Passed out. I was like, oh, man, I suck. Yeah. So what can I say? That must be a thing.

There's people I've seen. There's like I took a billion milligrams. I felt nothing. So, like, it's just different for everybody. Because me, like, yeah, one, two, I get, like, a good, like, A, you know? It's not like you're high, high, but you're just kind of, like, it's like having one beer. That's what I like feeling, where you're just kind of, like, all right, and then you're good. I mean, this is how I know I couldn't do hard drugs.

Like, if I can mess up that bad on that bad on pot, oh, my God. If I had something that had the potential to actually kill me, no, I'm all right. I would definitely be one of those dudes who they just found dead. I'm all right. I don't need that. No, thank you. You know, hey, kids, be smarter than Jesse. There's your thing.

That is a great way to live your life. It really is. be smarter than Jesse. There's your thing. That is a great way to live your life. It really is. Be smarter than Jesse. Yep. So that was the Omega Mark. Oh, okay. So, dude, I would love to take you to one of these. They have them all over the country in different places.

I know there's one in Colorado. There's one in Vegas. And there's a bunch of other ones. And they all have different themes. Anyway, the one in Vegas, and there's a bunch of other ones. And they all have, like, different themes. Anyway, the one in Vegas, Omega Mart is at this place called Area 15. And it's kind of like a cool, like, artsy rave complex. It's weird. They have a little rave area in the back.

And the night that we were there, they had a party called We're All Mad Here that was Alice in Wonderland themed. And so it was funny walking around. Half the people were just tourists. The other half were locals dressed in rave attire. But I'm Alice, but rave Alice. Right. A lot of mad hatters. Just an exorbitant amount.

But the complex itself has Different shops It has like a hand roll place And a burger place And like two or three bars And it has an arcade area But it also has an art exhibit by the Blue Man Group That is light and sound And it's called Infinity

And it's about infinity And it was super, it was fun There's another exhibit that was 420 based that was lights and reggae music. And you put on those diffuser glasses that make the light look crazy. So you kind of go into this room of lights and you just blast it with light and sound. And it was pretty fun. There's one thing that is it's a brain game where you take a quiz and a brain tells you who you are. And it's surprisingly accurate to everyone but also completely vague.

You know what I mean? Yeah. And they have – you can fly around the arena if you want. They have a bar that goes up into the air. I think it's called Liftoff. And you like go way up in the sky. But then they also have Omega Mart. And Omega Mart is what it appears to be a convenience store, a giant convenience store.

And you have to pay $60 to get in. And it is, on its face, one of those, like, Instagram-y art things, right? Everything in there is purchasable, but it's weird stuff. It's like a convenience mart that's, like, a little weird. For example, the spray bottles of, like, I don't know, like a cleaner, right, look kind of like I don't know like a cleaner right Look kind of like a giraffe The t-shirts are Very weird the hot sauces

For example There's a bunch of hot sauces And it goes from like mild to like Extreme but for each Image it's the same guy on the bottle But as it gets more towards extreme They become more warped and twisted and weird looking. And there's, you know, like a wall of –

I see a thing called Simply Spiders, and it's cereal. And it says simply does not contain spiders. Yeah, so there's weird stuff like that. There's one wall where it's completely – it looks like someone smeared the wall. And so the box starts on one side but then gets smeared across to another side. And so it's like a weird texturing effect. It's very cool. There's all sorts of weird stuff there.

In the produce area, there's like a weird infestation of something, but you're not really sure what it is. Or there's apples that have ham in them. It's very weird. It's bizarre. But then at the same time, as you're walking around looking at this store with its weird products and people are taking photos with it and stuff, and you can buy, like I said, you can buy different products. At the same time, there are all these monitors around that are kind of like if you're at

a grocery store or a gas station, it's kind of giving you advertisements. And the advertisements start completely normal, right? They're all normal. Except the longer you watch them, the more weird things you notice. And a great example, the one that I'll talk about because I don't want to spoil things for people who want to go, but like there's one that's in the produce section and it's the owner of Omega Mart, the company, and he's like talking about the corn. He's like, these great corn that we have

comes from the ground and is all natural, like that kind of stuff. But in the background there's like a little girl, and she keeps getting closer and there's weirder noises, and then when he turns to her he's like, Cece, what are you doing here? And she opens her mouth and she's like, and it's like really weird, right?

Very Lynchian stuff stuff very weird and when that i watched that i was like what the hell is what is this is that like supposed to be an artsy thing what's going on and then the lights flickered and like a voice came up over the intercom that was like this is a lie you must find the truth and i'm like what the so we're now 30 minutes in there. And I'm thinking to myself, well, I'm in some ARG now. I need to know what's going on. So there's a tent, for example. And if you get in the tent, there's a hole in the back of the tent that leads you into a cave system.

There's a door where they keep the sodas in the freezer. If you open one, one of them leads you into a – it's a doorway that leads you into a secret garage. There's a janitor's closet you can go in, like just walk in that says employees only, but you can walk in, and it leads you to a different place. There's a corporate headquarters you can find. There's a factory floor you can find.

There's a secret area where a group has a bunch of computers you can hack into. You can call numbers there. And it escalates to the point where eventually a dude in a lab coat in the factory found me and he was like, you seem to be digging into the story. Perhaps you'd find more as an employee. And he hands me an employee card and now I can use that card to access other things that I couldn't before. employee card and now I can use that card to access other things that I couldn't before.

Dude, I went down an ARG rabbit hole that involves some of the craziest shit I've ever seen in my life. Mini games, hacking things, like taking photos, finding numbers, calling numbers, running around finding barcodes, like opening secret doors, like crazy stuff that all had this massive story tied to it. Like it was a glorified escape room. Like it was amazing. Except you weren't trying to escape. You're trying to dig deeper and find secret rooms and hidden paths and different things in what turned out to be a massive, massive complex.

I was going to say, how big is this place? Huge. Huge. Much bigger than it looks like it would be. And in the end, I 100% ran the entire thing to the point where I got to the point where the guy was like, you've completed 80%, but if you want to know more, I'm authorized to give you the last secret missions. And I was like, oh my god, yes! We started at 6 p.m. Because we had a whole plan of whole plan We're going to go do this thing We'll go out we'll do stuff

We'll start here at Omega Mart And I'll stay 2 hours 30 minutes in I found myself on an adventure We didn't leave until 11pm We were there 5 hours I loved Every minute of it It was so cool

To give you some example of how insane this is, I was sending Alex and Mathis photos and weird audio clips from this thing because it goes so in Chaluminati territory. It's so out there. I was sending them

photos. I was like, guys, I'm in a cave and I found an old manuscript of art from the 1800s and inside it's aliens dude i think this is aliens i'm like taking photos it was crazy it's fun it was so fun i cannot stress you need to go ever and i guess they have them all over um the one in in colorado i guess is based off of the like legend of the denver airport and so that's got to be weird is that like the underground airport yeah yeah yeah and i'm sure they do something weird with it just like this thing was weird but um yeah it's like to give you another example, there was a wall that a bunch of people were like messing with dials.

And I had gone into like a hovel in the canyon and was looking through paperwork. Dude, I was looking through paperwork. And I found a note someone wrote that said do not turn dials to this. So I took a photo, went back over to this weird machine in the factory, turned the dials to that, and it opened a secret door. And I got to a certain point where I was looking at people around me, and there was one girl who was doing photos with her boyfriend for Instagram, where she was pointing to statues and posing with these weird masks. And I was just like, she doesn't know what that means.

She doesn't know what it means. It means something. She's mocking it. It means something. I'm looking at families go around, and the kids are jumping on weird stuff. And I'm like, that's evidence. They don't understand. They don't understand.

That person died there. They don't get it. Oh, yeah. I was in deep. I felt like I was above everyone else. They don't understand. No one understands the truth. They don't get it. Oh, yeah. I was in deep. I felt like I was above everyone else. Like, they don't understand. No one understands the truth. They don't get it.

Yeah. That is, that does sound like an experience. It sounds like a theme park. It was, I mean, it was. It was amazing. It was one of the coolest things I've experienced in a long time. I would do it again. The problem is because I 100%ed it they said they're gonna add more um but i feel like if i

went back with anyone else to this particular one i would either one be totally bored because i knew everything right or i would sit there the entire time and be like i don't know if i knew that if i were you you know like that kind of stuff and just be a giant pain in the ass and none of that sounds fun but i definitely go to the other ones Like there's one You know I mentioned there's a bunch Around the country

They're Meow Wolf I think it's what it's called Meow Wolf Oh yeah I see Meow Wolf Immersive Experiences And Yeah

Alright so they're in Texas Grapevine, Texas Denver, Colorado Santa Fe, New Mexico Houston, Texas And Las Vegas. So it's just southwest places, it looks like. Yeah.

Interesting. I'm sure they'll keep expanding. Yeah, I would absolutely, absolutely go to the different – if I had a reason to be in Houston, I'd go to one. I want to go to the Colorado one because I've never been to Colorado, first off. And second off, I imagine it would be super weird. Because if you look at the Denver airport stuff, it's super weird. Oh, yeah.

And everyone gets all caught up in it. I'm like, yeah, okay. I don't know if I believe it, but I love it. Yeah. That's crazy. I would love experiencing this thing. Yeah. Dude, you enjoy it tremendously. It's really good. I love sort of ARG-style live-action thingies. Big fan.

I've always wanted to go. There's a thing in New York where basically it's like, I don't know, two or three people can be involved. Basically, it's like, I don't know, two or three people can be involved, but it's an entire house party. But everyone there is an actor except for the guests, the like two or three people that go there who pay for the experience. And it's just a murder mystery. But it's you're caught up in it and everyone there is an actor except for like two or three of you. And I love that. I think it's so neat. Yeah, that's great. Yeah, and you just experience the night.

I think that's so cool. Yeah, that's great. You just experience the night. I think that's so cool. I love those kind of things. Obviously, I imagine it's way too expensive because, you know, you're paying. Yeah. You have to pay for everyone being there. Yeah. But, man, I'm like, that sounds so cool. You know what else sounds pretty cool?

Oh, speaking of experiences, oh my goodness, the highly anticipated action RPG sequel to the cult classic, Dragon's Dogma is here. Twelve years after the original, the deeply explorable fantasy world returns with enough single-player hijinks to get lost in the game doing really anything but the main quest. At its core, Dragon's Dogma 2 is about choice. Where you go, how you play, which pawns you bring along. And pawns, oh, let me tell you, just little sweethearts. Pawns are sort of a party, but more importantly, they are people created by either other players or Capcom themselves.

Ignore those Capcom ones. Don't do that. Get the other player ones. They're amazing. Sometimes they're so powerful. Right now my team is myself and then my pawn that I created, Crumb, who thanks to everyone for using Crumb. He's great. If people use your guy, they can send him with gifts back to you.

He's all decked out in gifts. He's looking great. He's a badass. And then I have two sorcery dudes that I got that are from other players. And one is this lady who she makes all my weapons catch on fire when I fight, which is awesome. And the other one's a guy who has like six heals. And I'm like, this is the best. This is the best team ever.

And we run around. We do stuff together. But because the pawns are both little sweet cherubs and also super jank, I love them. There was one time we were fighting, and we were battling this pack of goblins on top of a cliff. And one of them went to come attack me. And Crumb, because he's a tank, charges him and pushes him off the cliff. And I was like, hell yeah,

that looked amazing. And then I see the goblin hit the bottom and he still has a little bit of life left. All three of my pawns turn to the cliff and jump off to go kill him. And they all fall to their deaths. And I was like, what? So now I'm fighting like six goblins up top.

And then I have all my dead guys down below and one goblin down below who's yelling at me to come fight him. And I was like, oh, my God. This game is amazing. It is a treat. It's one of those things where it's not about the destination. It's about the process of getting there. And it's one of those things where at the moment, if I'm just waiting for something to happen or I'm a little bored,

I'll just pick it up, play for like an hour, and put it down, and I feel just fine. I'm like, because it's about exploration and finding new things, and it's a treat. It's a treat, and I absolutely cannot stress it enough. If you played the original, it's the exact same vibe, and if you've never played any Dragon's Dogma, I mean, give it a shot. Check it out. You'll have many great stories to tell. I have so many stories of random... I was

walking through a cave system, and out of nowhere this giant Grendel-looking dude comes out of nowhere. He's like, and he grabs me, and rather than eats me, he just starts licking my face as all of my teammates, all my pawns are attacking him,, he just starts licking my face as all of my teammates, all my pawns are attacking him.

And he's just licking my face like, what is this guy doing? And he threw me down. And it's like, you've been slimed. And my character can barely move. And I'm like, someone help me. And this guy's just wailing on my team. It's a treat. It's a real treat.

Pick it up today, of course. Go to dragonsdogma.com and buy the game and start your epic quest today rated M for Mature alright Crandall let's go to traffic with the guys with Crandall how's that traffic out there oh boy traffic

is actually pretty alright but it is getting a lot nicer out everywhere even here it's like in the 70s 80s right now it's pretty wild i think it's supposed to mainly be 60s 70s but you know everybody's starting to go out they're like oh it's nice outside so they're going all over so the traffic is gonna keep picking up especially as we get towards those warm months people get out of school people do vacations so uh not too bad now you know you got your standard traffic, but it's going to get worse.

Thank you. Thanks, Crandor. How's it hanging in that weather? Oh, I don't think you've ever said that as the old weather transition. Hey, man, you know, who knows where I'm at mentally right now. That's true. You're still recovering. Yeah.

We got weather weather that threw me off uh we have a weather request for all borg denmark an old danish city with some great historical buildings a street with only bars and clubs called jamfru on god which translates to virgin and street and a lot of people lost their virginity today Their virginity there what the shit the city sits along a fjord or a lot of people walk drunk at night Oh, this is Denmark's. Yes, that makes sense. I guess Classic Denmark dude. All right. Here we go. All Borg Denmark why I'm trying to... What about the virginity thing? It's throwing me out. What do you mean?

Is it like a red light district or something? Maybe that's what it must mean. Because I was like, wait, people just go to this city and it's like, Welcome! Come get your virginity stolen. Stolen's the wrong word. Stolen's not the right word there.'s not right yeah that's don't want that no um in alborg denmark it is 43 degrees fahrenheit feels like 36 yo it's pretty cool there uh i guess it is nighttime however because it's daytime here oh that's like 9 10 p.m is that the worst uh it is nighttime, however, because it's daytime here. Although that's like 9, 10 p.m.

It's not the worst. It is currently 29.85 inches of pressure, 79% on the humidity, visibility, 8 miles. We've got 613 a.m. sunrise, 828 p.m. sunset, winds at 16 miles per hour, and a dew point of 37 with a moon phase of waxing crescent looking at the 10 day 49 cloudy 52 cloudy 53 cloudy 48 cloudy uh friday 44 rain saturday 49 cloudy sunday 49 cloudy wow it was like 50 degrees and cloudy almost every day in Aalborg. Let me ask a question to the Aalborg people. Is a bakery a bakery?

B-A-G-E-R-I. Am I translating correctly? Is that a bakery? Bakery. Feels like that's what it would be, right? It sounds accurate. It sounds like bakery. Yeah, but also I see a lot of places that are like there's a baguette.

I assume it's like a bread shop, but bakery, right? Like a baguette. It's got to be something like that. It's got to be something. I haven't seen any bakeries yet. Oh, that's all I'm looking at, and they look delicious. There's one thing I learned about Denmark is every time I'm there, they have, like, some really good bakeries.

Are they called bakeries when you go there? I've never looked, but now that I'm looking, I see bakery, and I'm like, oh, I guess that's a thing. I mean, I found a basement beer bar. That looks pretty good. I found McDonald's, so that's, I mean, that's a thing. I mean, I found the basement beer bar. That looks pretty good. I found McDonald's. So that's, I mean, that's a thing. Yeah, I did see McDonald's. There's the wine bar.

I found Restaurant Smake. Smake? Restaurant Smake. Restaurant Smake. Wine bar. Yo, all these, you know what? You're doing pretty good. Alborg.

Bones, Bones, Alborg. Oh, is that a barbecue place? Restaurant Fusion. Ah, Thai. Oh, Bistros. Oh. AI Japan. Uh-oh.

Hello. They've taken over. The best restaurant I could find at the moment. I found out. Uh-oh. Hello. They've taken over. The best restaurant I can find at the moment. I found out. Wow, this one area has a lot of 4.6s. Mamma mia. I found one place.

It's called Dice and Drinks, and it's like board games and alcohol is what it looks like. Yo, I love that. I love that a lot. Yeah, that was great. Oh, I found the bagerette. Bagriette. That's what I'm saying. It's got to be bakery, right?

That's got to be a bakery, yeah. Yo, with a 4.9 Levin. Takeaway and Nydels. I don't know what this is, but it looks. How many reviews is that a 4.9? It looks delicious. Only 21 reviews out of 4.9? It looks delicious. Only 21 reviews. All right.

Okay. That's like 500 reviews out of 4.9. That would be insane. But it looks delicious. It looks like some of the freshest food I've ever seen in my entire life. Either they've got a master camera smith or this is. It looks gorgeous. It looks gorgeous.

Oh, I found it. There look at that look at the food look how fresh it looks oh wow it does look fresh that's what i'm saying it looks that's beautiful that's beautiful looking food yeah that's some good looking food wowee that's a plant like everything like looks delicious. Everything about it looks super fresh. Yeah, that looks really good. Take away and deniedly. I don't know what that means. Yeah, but there you go.

See, that's what I'm saying. It looks good. It looks cool. Yeah, and that's the weather. All right. Let's go to sports. Sports. Over at the sports desk here,

we've got the final day of NBA basketball is going on right now. All the playoffs are getting ironed out. So we'll know all the playoffs by next week. Playoffs. Over in basketball and then hockey. They're in their final week. So both hockey and basketball playoffs can be starting up like next week. so that's gonna be pretty cool uh then we've got the

baseball which is the yankees are 12 and 3 mama mia the royals 10 and 5 and the rangers 8 and 7 all atop their divisions and then the braves bre, and Dodgers all atop their division. Actually, the Pirates are tied with the Brewers. Wowee, they're still going. And then the NFL draft coming up in just like a week and a half at this point. I'm excited. One of my favorite times of the year. I'll actually be live streaming the first round of the NFL draft, our reactions at least.

So that's always fun. And that's sports. Well, also remember, we have a live show that I think there's still a few tickets left for. If not, I'll open them up because I want to sell out. I don't want any, like, you know know We don't have any friends we want to bring I'll find tickets But hey remember link down below

If you want to see Cox and Crandor live This July 13th We would love to have you It's back at our old stomping ground Lincoln Hall So come join us for some good old fun times Woohoo And your fact of the day.

Fact of the day. Day. Day. Day. Sloths. Can hold their breath. Sloths. Sloths can hold their breath longer than dolphins can.

By slowing their heart rates, sloths can hold their breath for up to 40 minutes. Dolphins need to come up for air about every 10 minutes. Honestly, it makes sense because sloths are so slow that they, you know, I was listening to some video the other day where it was talking about how there was these two divers that were working on an oil platform. They were setting up something deep beneath the ocean.

And basically from a boat to a diving bell, there was this air, I don't know, sort of tube going down. And then that connected to the two divers. And it would regulate the temperature in their suit because they were at the bottom of the ocean, right? So it would regulate the temperature in their suits while they worked, and it would keep the oxygen flowing. And eventually something happened where the computer that sort of keeps the boat in the exact position it needs to be, it broke. So the boat started to move away, and it pulled the diving bell, which then pulled the two divers.

But one of the divers got stuck on the machinery they're working on, and it sort of ripped the cable out. And so he had no oxygen or hot water coming to him. And so he had basically it was like, this guy's done. And so his plan was he's going to use the

extra oxygen he has in his backup tank and he's going to, instead of, he knows he needs to lie down to conserve energy so instead of lying at the bottom of the ocean where it'll be hard for people to find him, he's going to climb to the top of the machine and lie down on the machine. So he lies down on the machine, and he runs out of oxygen. It takes 36 minutes for people to get to him.

When they finally do, they pull him on board, and what they find is that when they wake him up, he's totally fine. He was dead for 36 minutes, but he's fine. Like his whole body kicks in again. And they're like, well, how is that possible? And what happened was is he had in his because of, you know, like pressures with the ocean floor and whatnot. The backup oxygen he had was a completely different mix. And it was oxygen and helium i think and

because oxygen expands you know it's like different you know different pressures it's very little oxygen and more helium and what it does is basically it like hyper saturated his and all of his organs and everything with oxygen and helium and it like and because it was so cold, his body started running very, very slowly. And because everything was oxygenated with double the amount of oxygen that a body normally has, when he died, really his whole body just kind of shut down. And when he was back in an oxygen, like a normal oxygen environment, it just restarted fine. Huh.

And it was basically just the mix because his body slowed down so much. So what I'm saying is I get how a sloth who is hyper slow could in fact be able to do that. You know what I mean? Yeah. That is pretty cool. Yeah.

And again, this may have been one of those Jesse was very high last night and he's remembering the story wrong, but I'm pretty sure that's what the story was. Sounds good to me. So that's the fact of the day. All right. What is our big news story of the day? Big news story of the day.

Day. Day. Day. Day. Day. Day. Folks, it's not looking good for the monkeys again. We've already lost Monkey Monday. Where is this going? Monkey mayhem could soon be a thing of the past in Central Thai City.

What do you... Whoa, whoa. What does that mean? Guess we'll find out. The wildlife officials laid out a plan on Wednesday to bring peace to a Central Thai City after at least a decade of human-monkey conflict. The macaws... How do you say it, right? This says macaques.

Well, all right, the macaques, you know, the macaques. That roam La Brea are a symbol of local culture and a tourist draw. But after years of dangerous encounters with residents and visitors and several failed attempts to bring peace, local people and businesses have had enough. The monkeys frequently try to snatch food from humans, sometimes resulting in tussles that can leave people with scratches and other injuries but outrage grew in march when a woman dislocated

her knee after a monkey pulled her off her feet in effort to grab effort to grab food and another man was knocked off a motorcycle by a hungry monkey what yes no no please continue authorities hope to round up some 2,500 urban monkeys and place them in a massive enclosure, said Athapol Charonishunza, the Director General of the Department of National Parks, Wildlife, and Plant Conservation. They'll work with wildlife experts to find a way

for a limited number of monkeys to stay at liberty in the city. I don't want humans to have to hurt monkeys, and I don't want monkeys to have to hurt humans, he told reporters. That last bit is a little mud. Like, I don't want to have to have monkeys hurt humans, but I will. An official monkey-catching campaign was launched last week, prioritizing more aggressive alpha monkeys. It has got 37 monkeys so far,

most of whom who have been placed under the wildlife authorities in the neighboring province of Saraburi, while others were sent to the zoo. Officials said they plan to capture the rest of the monkeys once the enclosures are complete, especially in the residential areas. Several cages will be prepared for different troops of monkeys to prevent them from fighting.

Athepol said he expects the first phase of the operation to start within weeks and believed the huge cages will be able to contain thousands of monkeys and will solve the problem very quickly. I don't know that I like them just being like, the problem will be solved when we throw monkeys in cages. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know that I like that.

The monkeys are a symbol of the province about 140 kilometers north of Bangkok, where the ancient Three Pagodas Temple celebrates an annual monkey buffet festival, and they're commonly seen throughout the city. They are classified as a protected species under Thailand's wildlife conservation law. Some have blamed the city's monkey troubles

on tourists and residents feeding the animals, which they said drew monkeys into the city and boosted their numbers. Okay, all right. I mean, it seems like they're blaming all that on the monkeys, though. Yeah, when really it's the people. Yeah, they're like, the tourists were the problem, so we're going to punish the monkeys.

Yeah, they should be like, hey, you gotta stop feeding them. Although you could say stop feeding them and people would be like, I'm gonna feed the monkey. That's what the cages are for. You feed the monkeys, you go to the cage. Those are the rules. That would be a good rule. Yeah, you feed the monkey, you go to the cage. You go to the cage.

It sounds ominous. Feed the monkey, go to the rules. That would be a good rule. Yeah, you feed the monkey, you go to the cage. You go to the cage. Sounds ominous. Feed the monkey, go to the cage. Okay. An earlier effort to limit feeding may have made things worse, some residents say. Local officials began threatening fines for feeding monkeys outside of a few designated areas around the main tourist attractions in recent years. areas around the main tourist attractions in recent years, but those feeding areas were dominated by a few troops of highly territorial monkeys, while rival

bands grew hungry and turned to harassing humans in other areas. I mean, like, I know it's nature and I know how nature works, but still, the concept of rival bands of monkeys is really funny to me. It is pretty funny. It's, uh, Athopol said people shouldn't see monkeys as villains saying that authorities might have not been efficient enough in their

work to control the population that's the point now that used to be like they'd go there to get the food now they're going there and they're like give me the food idiot and they're like beating people up i kind of want to see that i'm not gonna lie i kind of do too uh he said they're working in other areas of thailand that are facing problems with monkeys such as places i can't pronounce he said 52 of the country's 77 provinces report frequent problems from monkeys they should be studying the 25 that are You know Sam monkey mayhem coming to an end

Damn, damn, you know what probably the best let's be real probably for the best. Yeah, but monkey Monday should come back Mm-hmm. I know agreed. Yeah That's that and that too was ruined by people. Unbelievable. That's your big news story of the day. All right. Well, that's it for us. Thanks so much for listening and watching.

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