Creating Confidence with Heather Monahan - The Key to Attracting More Money Into Your Life With Chris Harder Entrepreneur, Philanthropist & Host Of The Chris Harder Podcast Episode 203
Episode Date: March 29, 2022In This Episode You Will Learn About: Key money making principles How to attract positive support Controlling your perspective Resources: Website: chrisharder.me Join The Podcast ...Launch Plan Listen to The Chris Harder Show Twitter: @ChrisWHarder Instagram: @chriswharder LinkedIn & Facebook: @Chris Harder Text “Daily” to (310) 421-0416 Overcome Your Villains is Available NOW! Order here: https://overcomeyourvillains.com If you haven't yet, get my first book Confidence Creator Show Notes: The truth is you NEED other people in order to succeed. The more positive YOU are the more positive people you will attract to assist you with your goals! Today we’re focused on how shifting our perspective on money can be the KEY to changing our lives. In addition to owning and investing in several multimillion dollar companies, our guest today, Chris Harder is an expert when it comes to managing our money and creating abundance for ourselves. Tune in to discover Chris’s money principles and how you can begin earning six and seven figure incomes! About The Guest: Our amazing guest Chris Harder is the host of the top rated podcast, The Chris Harder Show where he uses his platform to encourage entrepreneurs to become unapologetic in their pursuit of wealth, and generous in their giving! His success as an entrepreneur, investor, AND philanthropist is founded and built on the belief that, when good people make good money, they do good things. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Crunch. What a name for a chocolate bar. Tells you what you're signing up for.
Crunch. That glorious combination of crispy rice and 100% milk chocolate makes
crunch the chocolate bar that's just more fun. It's the mic drop of chocolate.
It's chocolate with game. It's chocolate with, hmm, what's the word in it after? Oh yeah, crunch.
Truth of matter is this, you need other people to succeed.
And those other people are attracted to people
that seem positive.
They're attracted to people that seem
like they're full of positive perspective
or opportunity.
They don't want a partner.
They don't want to help with someone who's negative.
They don't want to work with somebody
or list someone up who feels like
they're always seeing the pessimistic side of things.
And so from a practical standpoint,
if you have those practices in place,
you're gonna show up better when you show up better,
other people are gonna wanna help you get
across the finish line.
I'm on this journey with me.
Each week when you join me,
we are going to chase down our goals.
We've come at adversity and set you up for better tomorrow.
After no sleep, yeah.
I'm ready for my close talk.
Hi, and welcome back.
I'm so excited for you to meet our guest today.
He's the host of the top rated podcast, The Chris Harder Show.
Chris Harder uses his platform to empower entrepreneurs
to become unapologetic in their pursuit of wealth
and generous in their giving.
The foundation of Chris' success as an entrepreneur investor in philanthropist is built on his belief
that when good people make good money, they do great things. In addition to owning and investing
in several multi-million dollar companies, Chris uses his online course, The Money Principles,
his two mastermind groups, and his exclusive one-on-one
business coaching to help countless clients earn six and seven figure incomes. And I'm selfishly
so glad he's here today to help you and me. Chris, thanks for being here.
Oh, I have that the pleasure is all mine. Thank you so much for having me.
Okay, wait a minute. When I was researching you, I feel like your show, your podcast,
used to be called for the love of money. Did you change the name? For the love of money.
It's interesting. When you start a brand, when you start a show, you have to be really,
really niche, right? Like in the title, you have to tell people what they're going to get. And so,
we did that for a couple of years. And then that very same thing that was a niche became kind of a lid. And this is not necessarily a bad thing.
But the lid was that some people would be triggered by the title.
As a matter of fact, I would get tagged on Instagram so many times
where people would be sharing the episode.
And Heather did say something like, don't let the title scare you away.
This episode is really, really good.
And it happened over and over and over again. like don't let the title scare you away. This episode is really, really good.
And it happened over and over and over again.
And I realized the very thing I was trying to help overcome
money mindset and our feelings around money
was the thing that was sometimes stopping people
from listening to the show.
And so at first it was an advantage,
but then it became a lid and I wanted to remove the lid
and also be able to talk about other things
that were important to me.
Okay, so that's super interesting to me because I am not triggered by the name for the love of money.
I don't have any emotion around that at all and it actually surprises me that other people are, what is that all about?
So we all have this programming around how we feel about money growing up, right?
And money can be a really shameful, it can be a scary thing. We can have been taught growing
up without even realizing it that we are not meant to pursue it or have too much of it or if you're
rich somehow that means you're greedy or bad or you're taking from somebody else. And of course
none of that is the truth. But boy, that programming when we're growing up, that sticks with us when
we're adults and that's hard to shake. And so when somebody needs to learn about money, but they're also triggered by their feelings
around money based on their past programming, that's a really tough spot to be because now
you may not pick up the book that is meant for you.
Now you may not listen to the podcast that's meant for you.
Now you may not go to that seminar or go hire that coach that's meant for you because it's
such a triggering thing.
So it's a really tough spot to be in when you've grown up with some of these things being triggers.
And so it's our goal to help to remove a lot of these layers of stories that people have built
around money growing up so that we can then make them this clean slate that is available to unapologetically pursue what they were meant to pursue. And when people
unapologetically pursue, what it was that they were put here to do, then that's when the money starts
coming in finally. And everything finally starts to hit for them. So we're just trying to get people
over that hump a little bit. Well, and you're absolutely doing that. And now doing that at scale,
which is so amazing. One of the things that I really find
interesting and I relate to incredibly with you is your background in corporate America,
success in corporate America, the traditional way, right, you know, taking it back a few years,
but then that pivot moment in 08 and how you've really Launched this non-traditional or more contemporary, you know massively successful
Endeavor in business and entrepreneurial journey and I would love it just for my own selfish interest for you to take us back to
Who you were back in that corporate America banking world that you were in and how that
only year and situation impacted you.
Yeah, I'd love to take you back there because it's a really important story for a lot of
people.
So, I grew up in banking, so to speak, not mean as a kid, but you know, that's beginning
my career.
And I was one of the fastest rising executives of the world's biggest bank.
And so it felt good, right?
It felt like every year I was getting a big new promotion and every year I was going to
get a new bonus.
And the problem was I was young and arrogant and ignorant and I thought it was going to
last forever.
Despite people telling me, hey, this is probably not going to last forever, I thought it was
going to last forever.
And we were living way beyond our means.
And when I say we, I mean me, even though Laurie was my wife, because I was taking care
of the finances.
And she really didn't have any idea that we were that far overextended.
And so what happened was when 2008-2009 hit, of course, it's a banking and real estate
recession, the music stopped, and we were left holding the bag.
Now some people have chosen pivots, right?
For example, my wife a couple of years ago said, hey, I don't want to do the self-development
thing anymore that I'm doing.
I would love to pivot into building this beverage company.
But other people have forced pivots.
And that was me in that situation.
I was forced when they came to me.
Said, hey, we're gonna let you go.
And here's your severance package.
I was forced to pivot.
Now, that was a scary, horrible, like disastrous time
in the moment.
Listen, I'm never gonna convince somebody that these moments where you have a forced pivot
is gonna feel good, but I will promise you,
if you're there right now,
or if you think you're coming up on something like this,
I promise you you will look back on this forced pivot
with so much fondness and appreciation. and again, it's so hard to
realize in the moment, but I promised you'll look back on it because when you get knocked down
and when you're stripped of everything, including your identity, because my identity at that time
was what's my title, how many people am I managing, what's my next promotion going to be, right?
So when you stripped of that identity that you think makes you important, well you get to choose again. And I saw this as my opportunity to choose again. How did
I want to show up in the world this time? How did I want to add value? What did I not want to do
anymore? So I'll be honest, the ego and the arrogance that came with that previous version of myself.
It wasn't fun, it wasn't comfortable.
I didn't like being a judgemental individual,
but those were things that came with environment
that I was in and those were things
that came with insecurities of being younger,
not working through a lot of those things yet.
So that moment of being able to choose again,
hindsight being 2020 was one of the best gifts
that was ever given to us.
That's interesting that you bring up
sort of that corporate culture
and again, not all, I'm not
saying all corporate cultures
are this way, but where you're
really being rewarded for being
that most arrogant version of
yourself and putting value
towards that title, the bank
account and really
prancing that around and it's
so funny and that's not unique to banking. I was in, you know, the media business and it's so funny and that's not unique to banking. I was in the media business and it was
exactly the same way that whoever pulls up in the nicest Mercedes wins and who have really
rewarding those outward values versus who you feel about you are inside and showing up as that
real version of yourself. Yeah, you almost feel like you're playing a role, right? So you've got this
shiny exterior on and you're bulletproof and don't worry,
I can take on more work and don't worry.
I'm qualified for this next role and you almost have to live in to that next role or maybe even
live into the next couple of roles before you get there so that people notice you.
It's a game that you have to play if you are in corporate.
And I wish it wasn't that way, but the facts are the facts.
And that was a role that I was playing.
And I wasn't necessarily fully happy playing that role,
but I understood the game
and I was willing to win at that game.
And I'll tell you, the thing I love
about entrepreneurship is this.
In corporate America, there's only just so many roles
that can be given out. So for
example, if you want VP of this or a C-suite executive of that, there's just so
many of those spots that can be given out. So it's a competition. You have to
almost pull somebody else down even though you don't want to in order to get
that spot. But not your canoe worship. There is more than enough room for any kind
of coach you want to be or any kind of coach you want to be, or any kind of beverage company
you want to build, or any kind of new fintech, which is what I'm working on right now that you want to
build. There is more than enough to go around. So entrepreneurship, I feel like, is more encouraging
and inclusive than when I was fighting over one position with maybe 50 other people in corporate
America. Now, listen, this is not a corporate America is bad thing.
This is none of that because it played such an important role in my life.
And we need incredible individuals that are meant to play those roles.
But I will tell you, I'm much happier now that I've followed this calling than staying
back there.
Absolutely.
And again, it's like you said, you can see how the dots connect when you look back.
But when you're in it and you're in that moment, you don't know how those dots are going to connect. So what were those first sell this great big home that we just built. We have to sell
or walk away from the rental properties. We have to get rid of all these cars. You name, I had to break
the news, so to speak. And I remember Lori looked at me and she was calm and she paused and she could
have been mean, she could have been angry, she could have been all those things, but she wasn't.
She looked at me and she said, I will never let this happen again.
And that became the birth of Lori,
how people know Lori today,
because until that moment, she never had an opportunity,
really, or the urgency to go and develop her skills
that she was meant to go and develop.
So that's one of the positive things that came out of it.
So step one was breaking the news.
Step two was swallowing and accepting this opportunity at reinvention.
Listen, I could have looked at it and said, poor us or this happened to us or any of those
things.
And I didn't.
Of course, I had some anger.
I had a lot of insecurity.
I had plenty of fear.
But I saw it as a bit of relief.
I didn't have to play this role anymore and I got to choose again.
And I'm telling you, the best thing that you can control is perspective.
You're either going to have a negative set of lenses on or an opportunistic set of lenses on.
I've always been pretty opportunistic.
I chose the opportunistic set of lenses.
I put those on and I said,
what could life look like going forward?
That's really where our entrepreneurial journey started.
In fact, I always had that entrepreneurial bug in me.
There were a few things I tried kind of half-heartedly in the past.
So that seed was always there.
This was just the first opening for it to really grow into something.
And I'll tell you what the third step was,
was accepting reality and making the best out of it.
In other words, we sold everything or short-sold everything
or walked away from
everything in order to have a clean slate and started out in a tiny little 900 square foot loft
department in downtown Minneapolis and built from there. Instead of trying to somehow
string this out or drag it on, we just said, you know what, let's tear off the bandaid. Let's
start fresh and then let's build something the bandaid. Let's start fresh.
And then let's build something great going forward with these new lessons that we have
in life.
And that really was what gave us the trajectory, those few steps of launching us, so to
speak.
And how many years, you and I were just talking before we turned the recording on about
you're now closing on your third home and you have, you know, a different
home for every season. And you're living that proverbial American dream now that we all want to live.
How long did it take from that rock bottom? You had to go home and tell Lori that, you know,
you had to start over to say, you know what, I think this is working a long time. See, that was about
12 years ago as you and I sit here and record today, I guess,
almost 13 years ago, right? So, that felt like a short journey, but it's technically a long time.
13 years is a long time. And what happened was we became so gunshot. You know, the Pendulum
always swings too far one way or the other. So, in losing everything, we became so afraid to spend
again. We became so afraid to, you know, part with our money again,
that we really had to,
and that's a lot of where what I talked about today
it comes from,
we really had to set out to learn
what do smart people do with their money?
What do the people who have the life
that we eventually want?
What do they do with their money?
How do they behave?
How do they think?
And it was in accumulating all that
information and being willing to trust the information that you're accumulating. It's
start to put it into practice a little bit and let that practice turn into small muscles,
and small muscles turn into large muscles. That here we are 13 years later and these homes
were getting these all in basically a one year period. And so it's not like it happens overnight
by any stretch of the
imagination. But I'll tell you, Lauren, I made a couple of financial rules for ourselves that I
would love to share. One of them in order to protect ourselves was that we will never, ever have
less than multiple income sources. And the rule that we live by is if any one income source
went away today, we would not have to change anything
about our lifestyle tomorrow.
So this is the ultimate goal.
Heather, this is what people should work towards.
We live in a time, multiple income sources is not luxury.
It's a must have because the world is changing
so quickly, so dynamically.
So you want to work towards building enough income sources
that even if you're biggest one,
even if you're best one went away today,
you wouldn't have to change your lifestyle tomorrow
because the others could support you.
That's rule number one, rule number two,
was we decided we weren't gonna buy anything that's a luxury.
Now, I don't mean the home over your head,
I don't mean the car that gets you to and from work.
I mean the extras, for example, these extra homes
or a motor home or a boat or something like that.
We weren't gonna buy any of that stuff unless we could pay cash for it.
Now, it doesn't mean we do pay cash for it because that would be wasting the chance
at leveraging money right now at 3%, which is basically free money.
But we will not buy something unless we can pay cash for it without changing our future lifestyle.
So that's rule number two that we live by.
And then rule number three is just that we try and pause and we really try and ask ourselves,
is this just something we want for instant gratification or is this something that in two
or three years, we really see playing a significant role.
So let's talk about this lake home that we're gonna close on soon.
This is not Instagram certificate.
We are already get to go up to Wisconsin every summer.
My mom has a lake home there.
We're already keep our boat up there.
So this is not an Instagram gratification.
Oh, it'd be nice to have this.
This is a legacy piece of property
that became available and Lori and I can't wait
to bring our kids that we don't have yet
to bring our kids up and make memories and friends and have this be in the family for a long time.
So it's a long-term play instead of an instant gratification play.
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Oh, it's so, so good. And I love that you're both so on the same page about
everything. What role does it play who you chose as your spouse in your
entrepreneurial journey? That's such a great question.
So Lori and I met when she was 21 and I was 24.
Friends first then became lovers.
I wanted, you know, to, to be hooked up right away immediately.
She had a different agenda, different timeline than me.
And so I was willing to, you know, work through that, uh, be patient, work
through being able to quote, earn her.
But when we met at 21, 24, that's young.
And you're very different people than you are today as I'm 44 and she's 41.
And so over that 20 years, you become at least three or four different people each, right?
Your likes, your interests, what drives you, everything.
It changes radically.
So in fact, we should be changing.
It's so unfair for people to expect
the person they met 10, 15, 20 years ago
to be the same person they met.
That would be a nightmare.
Laurie would be so boring to me
if she was the same Lord even, wouldn't she was 21.
And I would be so boring to her
if I was the same Chris, you know, that I was And I would be so boring to her if I was the same Chris,
that I was when I was 24.
So what's really made it work, it was a couple of things.
One, we've always said we're willing to try it on for size.
So just like when you go in the dressing room,
you try and open on for size, is it a fit for me?
Is it not?
Instead of saying that's a dumb idea,
or why would you want to do that?
We've made agreement that we always try each
others ideas on for size. And part of the rule is it doesn't have to be a fit. There is
no obligation for it to be a fit. When somebody brings up, hey, I would love to try this
or I want to switch careers or, you know, what if we could start experimenting with X, Y,
and Z. If you shoot it down right away instead of trying it on for size or considering it,
that makes the other person feel bad. And then they stop bringing exciting ideas to you. And then that dooms the relationship.
So you want to create an atmosphere where it's absolutely okay to reinvent yourself or bring
new ideas into the relationship and know that the other person isn't going to embarrass you or
shoot it down, but instead they're going to try it on for size. So that's been one great rule that's
kind of helped us
morph into who we are today.
I think the other thing is we have,
you're gonna laugh at this, but we've always been walkers.
Like we walk three to six miles a day,
every single day, it's a non-negotiable for us.
If it's a pouring rain out, we'll still be out walking.
Because when we got that guaranteed container
to physically remove ourselves from the place
where we've done battle all day
and change our state a little bit,
and we know that we're gonna have that chance
to connect to first thing in the morning
and then at the end of our work day,
that's a really important container
to be able to talk through anything
that would otherwise be put on the back burner.
And I'll tell you what, we've done a great job
of putting things
out when they're smoke instead of letting them turn into a fire and trying to put it out then.
And we're able to do that because we've got this daily container where we're willing to address
anything that we have to address. So those are just a couple of ways that we've kind of grown
into the people that, you know, they look at us today and they might say, oh,
must be nice to have found another entrepreneur that understands how you're taking all that.
We were not those people.
We grew into those people together.
I follow both of you on social media, so I don't know whose feet it was on, but one
of you had posted about one of your morning walks and you were doing what you do in the
morning, which is you're really positive and you were trying to help her reframe something
in a positive light.
And I just, when I was reading that,
I thought, you know, there's so much beauty
and the individuality of people
when they come together in a relationship
to be able to add in that moment when someone needs you.
Yeah, individuality is so important in a relationship.
We have such independent lives.
I don't want social media, They see us together a lot.
But for example, tonight, I'm going to the box suns game with three other guys.
She's going to go out with some girlfriends.
It's so important for us to have separate lives.
We have separate businesses, separate friends, separate everything.
And of course, we also share a lot of sets of friends and share a lot of things as well.
But if you don't have those separate identities, you become very boring to each other.
If you don't have those separate identities, everything becomes very monotonous.
You run out of things to talk about.
I really think it's important to have those separate identities because then to address
what you had just asked about, if I have outside perspective, it's easier for me to maybe steer her back on track because
of that outside perspective I had gotten as opposed to just being in the trenches with
her and getting no outside perspective or vice versa.
There's so many times where I'll ask her for counsel on something and she'll have a brilliant
idea that she had because of the other people that she's networking with. And had she just stayed in our own circle,
she wanted to have that idea to share with me.
So it's crucial.
It's so powerful.
One of the things I really like that you talk about,
and this is where I think you with money and wealth and creating abundance
is really much more modern than that younger version of yourself,
is the importance that you play spirituality
in regards to abundance, which was,
that was really new to me,
and I'd love it if you could share with us
how spirituality is a part of wealth.
It's massive.
So we just talked about this on a walk the other day.
Lori said to me, she said,
how much do you think of our financial success
has been spiritual?
Like out of the blue on the walk.
I said, what a great question, I don't think it was ever really asked me that before and we spent
the rest of the one hour, you know, kind of hashing it out. And we had two different answers. Her
answer was damn near all of it. Basically, let's call it 95% was spiritual. Mine was 60 to 80% and then
I think I said a lot about 80%. And here's the premise of both of our answers.
When you have a really good spiritual practice, whether it's prayer or meditation, when you believe
in something bigger than you, when you have the consistency of those practices that can kick you
back in the game when you're having a bad day or a bad moment or a bad whatever, those small shifts
when they start to shift you back into the game,
those have a compounding effect.
And so what might seem like a small adjustment,
then has a positive impact on the next thought that you have.
And that has a positive impact on the next thought that you have.
And before you know it, you've totally turned around the energy
that you're operating with.
And you're showing up brighter,
and you're showing up more positive, and you're showing up more positive and you're showing
up more opportunistic, then if you didn't have that spiritual practice.
And so I can tell you that without a doubt, spirituality is, you know, I'm going to put the
number 80% of our success.
She's going to put the number 95 to 100% of our success.
But the punchline would be, you're not going to reach your peak.
You're not going to reach what you're capable of doing
without having strong spiritual practices.
So one of the things that confuses me,
and I truly, truly mean this,
because I was much older in life
when I had my pivot, I was 43 when I was fired
from corporate America, I had learned through proof,
through I saw it.
I didn't have a spiritual practice.
I worked incredibly, it was the grind grind and I made a ton of money.
I created a lot of success and wealth without the spiritual practice with the grind.
Now, cut to today and your teachings and so many people's teachings is all about your
relationship with energy, the universe, God, you know, that which is big, that spiritual
concept, meditating, which to me,
if somebody had told me that when I was in corporate America, I would laugh at them and told them
they're lazy or crazy. And then this idea of working smarter, not harder to really sustain what
you're doing and grow to the next level, I truly find it at time, even though I am embracing what
you're saying. And I truly am leaning into there's so much more beyond us out there.
And it's steering us the right way.
And I want to be in that flow and let it guide me.
But there are moments I have to come back and fight with this.
Hang on, maybe I should just go out and work hard and make this thing happen.
You are more like me.
And then Laurie would be more on the opposite end of the spectrum.
So let me try and kind of bridge the gap for you a little bit. So I always like to say whether you're woo-woo
or whether you're super pragmatic and practical, there's an explanation for both. If you're
woo-woo, no different than energy. Let's talk about energy. When you tune a radio to a certain
frequency, it goes out and attracts another frequency and that brings it in. You get the song
or the baseball game or whatever it is that you want to this new on the radio.
So from a woo standpoint, I have had so many experiences in life
where I have prayed on or meditated on or journaled
forever, something and it eventually happens.
Now from a practical and pragmatic standpoint,
which is more where I lean, I have had those same experiences.
I can explain it from the standpoint of, listen,
if you're constantly journaling something you want to manifest.
And if you're constantly picturing something
that you want to manifest, sooner or later,
it's going to have an effect on that very first action
that you take that starts to make that thing appear.
And then, because you took that first action,
now it causes you to take a second action.
And because you're taking consistent action,
now it might attract somebody to come be a business partner
or help you get there because they see you taking action.
And before you know it, you receive this thing
that you're working towards because you've taken
the right actions and the right people have helped you.
And that's a very
practical way of looking at why things appear or why things happen when you are constantly
envisioning them and when you have a good spiritual practice because the truth of matter is this you need other people to succeed and those other people are
attracted to people that seem positive, they're attracted to people that seem like a full of
positive. They're attracted to people that seem like they're full of positive perspective or opportunity. They don't want to partner. They don't want to help
with someone who's negative. They don't want to work with somebody or or list
someone up who feels like they're always seeing the pessimistic side of things.
And so from a practical standpoint, if you have those practices in place, you're
going to show up better when you show up better. Other people are going to want to
help you get across the finish line. I couldn't agree more with you. And this is super interesting because
this just happened the past couple of months for me is someone who's big into energy, which again,
this is all new in my world. You know, was talking to me about my whole backs and my life. And what
she said to me was she said, you were so surrounded by fear and this idea of unsafe, not being safe for so much of your life,
you were attracting people into your life that wouldn't turn and sure that you weren't safe,
you know, that, and because they didn't feel safe and then they'd be threatened by you and then
you'd be fired or whatever. It was an interesting domino effect that she laid out for me and it made
all the sense in the world. For people who are in those moments right now, where they don't feel safe, they feel scared,
they're full of fear, and they don't wanna keep attracting
more fear to them, what are the steps
that you'd buy them to take?
When people are scared when they have a lot of fear,
they feel like they're typically afraid of the unknown, right?
They feel like things are out of their control.
And so when you start to pull things
into your control, for example, if you say,
all right, I don't trust the thing that he's saying right now, I think this is all a bunch of B.S.
But I'm willing to try it because what I'm doing right now is not working.
So when you start to take things into control by saying, all right, can I picture for five minutes
a day the life that I really want? Yes. So I'll start doing it even though I don't
believe in it. And then you say, could I maybe read 10 pages of a positive book every single day
to start my day before I do anything else? Yes, I don't believe in it, but I could do it. And then
when you start to say, okay, could I go to a self-development thing or could I get a coach or could I do
these things that I don't believe in, but technically I could do it, yes. Now look what's happening. Your fear comes
from thinking you don't have control, but now you're starting to control your perspective.
Now you're starting to control who's going to come into your life and who's not. Now you're
starting to control some of the actions that you take. And those things have a snowball effect.
And before you know it, you're gonna start to see little wins.
And little wins will string together
into what feels like a medium-sized win.
And you say, wow, this might actually be working.
And those medium-sized wins will string together
into what you look back on,
and say, holy crap, this is a massive win.
And it's just, if you could trace it all the way back,
it traces back to, you are afraid
because you feel like you don't have control.
But if you control the little baby things, even if you don't trust them yet, if you control the little baby things,
that control your perspective, that then control your actions, that then control your results,
you do that long enough and consistently enough.
It's inevitable that you're going to end up getting to where you want to get.
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I love the idea of starting off small too,
because when you are really scared
and you are feeling stuck,
taking a big leap or making a huge change
just does not seem within the potential of reality.
No, Heather, there's been so many things I do,
tiny little habits that I think are complete BS.
Like I'm like, remember, I told Laurie and Wave Agreement, well, I tried things on for size. So I have tried so many things on for size that I think are complete BS. Like I'm like, remember, I told Laurence and we have agreement, well, I try things on for size.
So I have tried so many things on for size
that I thought this is the biggest load of BS,
but I'm gonna do it
because I promise to try and on for size.
And so I could do it.
So I therefore I did do it
and I did do it long and consistently enough
to all of a sudden where I realized,
wait, I'm getting some positive results. And so even if I don't trust it yet,
if I'm getting positive results from something,
I'm going to keep doing it.
And as you get more positive results,
that compounds into a bigger positive result and so on.
So I'm telling you, I'm not asking you to trust it yet.
I'm not asking you to believe in it yet.
I'm not asking you doing that stuff.
But if what you're doing right now isn't working,
then begrudgingly, reluctantly, do
these small little practices, whether it is reading 10 pages a day, whether it is listening to
a positive podcast, whether it is waking up to a mantra, do these small steps, even if you don't
believe it on me yet consistently, and I promise you will start to see small results turn in
a medium result, turn in a big results.
What are some of the mantras that you use?
So I wake Lori up every single day is a bit new for years.
I wake her up and I say I'm happier healthier, wealthier, and more fit than I was yesterday.
And I make her say it back to me.
And by the way, the reason why I say that I was yesterday, it feels like a small increment.
I can believe in that, right?
You know what people can't believe in when they're like someone adv increment. I can believe in that, right? You know what
people can't believe in when they're like, uh, someone advises them to say a mantra,
like, uh, I am a hundred millionaire, right? And in their mind, they're like, this is bullshit.
I'm not. But what you can say is that, you know what? I am happier, healthier, wealthier,
and more fit than I was yesterday. That's a small increment that you can believe in. And
so I wake her up to that and I make her say it back to me and such a love hate relationship thing,
and I'm like, she's like sleeping and she's like,
leave me alone.
And I'm like, no, say it back like you mean it.
So she'll say it back and then I'll roll over real quick.
And I'll just say a tiny prayer of things I'm grateful for.
We're talking less than 60 seconds.
And it's so random and juvenile.
I'll be like, I'm so grateful that my dog's laying
across my legs and grateful I woke up next to Lori
and grateful I woke up next to Lori and grateful.
I welcome this beautiful home.
Right.
String together 60 seconds of things that you are grateful for.
Now by the time my feet hit the ground, I have chosen what set of lenses,
what colored lenses I want to see my morning through.
And if you can control how you see your morning, you can easier control how
you see things unfold in your afternoon.
And if you can control how you see things unfolding in your afternoon, then you can easier control the end result of your day.
And so that's the mantra I wake Laurie up to, but I actually text people a different mantra, whether it's a money, mindset, mantra, a positive business perspective, every single
day that I wake up on it through Friday.
And the idea was, Laurie's, I got to give her credit, but she's like, listen, I kind of hate,
but I also love that you do this for me, you should do this for other people.
And I'm like, oh my God, you're right.
And so I said, hey, text me the word daily to 310-421-0416.
If you want me to text you a positive mantra or business perspective every morning when I wake up and
People started texting it to me. So I had to keep my promise to our text and back now I text thousands and
Thousands of people every single morning a positive money mindset mantra or a positive business perspective and the responses have
The greatest things on the plan. I love reading them because, you know, about new and or something, I'll open up my text,
I'll start looking at all the responses.
And the way people say, oh my God, I needed this today.
Or, hey, I was about to make a really bad decision.
And this changed my perspective on it.
It's the best feeling on the planet.
So it's one of the coolest things I do.
Will you share with everybody how they can sign up for that text program?
Yeah, totally free.
No strings attached.
It's literally was Lori's idea and this is my way of giving back.
But if you text me personally, the word daily, just text me the word daily to 310-421-0416.
Again, it's 310-421-0416.
Then I'll put you on the list and you'll be part of my daily texting.
I love that you're doing it. So much of what you do, Chris, and it comes across
so clear on social is about giving back what what role does the give back play in
your business and your life and in who you are.
I mean, first of all, it feels good.
Like when you help somebody else, whether you give them five dollars,
whether you open the door for them, whether you get them some good advice, it feels
good, right?
And two to three, it feels good, right?
And I believe that those feelings were put in us for a reason so that we do it more.
No different than, hey, it feels really good to procreate, right?
Or to at least practice it?
I believe that those feelings were put into us so that we will continue to procreate.
Well, same thing with doing good for others.
It was placed in you that dopamine hit so that you
would do it more. And here's what happens. When you give, even if you have very little or nothing,
if you give a dollar, everyone could give a dollar, even if you don't know where your rent is coming
from next. If you give a dollar, it signals to yourself that sure enough, in this very moment, I did have access. And access, by definition, is abundance.
And if I have access and abundance now, well, then I am not in as bad of a situation as I think I'm
in, and I could probably find a way to manufacture or create more access or abundance so I can get
this dopamine hit again. Heather, when you do things for other people,
you are willing to run through a wall much further
faster tougher than when you do it for yourself.
Right?
Like have you ever tried to stick to something for yourself
and you let yourself off the hook,
or like, oh, I'm gonna do this diet now,
or I'm gonna do this new habit now,
and you kind of let yourself off the hook,
but when you do it for somebody else, you show up big.
And that's because intuitively,
we were designed to show up for other people.
That's how the world is supposed to work.
So why not leverage that?
Why not feed off those dopamine hits,
make the world a better place,
and then in return, because you're feeling good,
you're doing good.
I'll share a really quick example that makes it really tangible.
I've got a friend whose name is Steve.
And starting years ago, Steve and his wife
said, I'm going to give $50,000 this year. Now, they didn't have a lot of money. I think
they're probably making $150,000 a year at the time when they made this commitment. So,
that's a bold commitment. But because they committed to it, they then had to flip the script
and say, Oh, God, if we're going to keep this promise, how are we gonna find an extra $50,000
to make sure we keep our promise?
And sure enough, at the end of the year,
they had a record income year.
So they said, well, that worked pretty good.
Why don't I up it?
And I think they upped it.
I'm not kidding, to $250,000 from $50,250.
I know, sounds crazy, right?
And they had no idea where that $250
is gonna come from, but they said, well,
we better find a way, right?
Ask a better question, get a better answer.
Well, we better find a way where we're going to be able to get this extra 250 from.
And then that became their first seven figure year.
They far exceeded seven figures.
And so because they had the evidence, they said, well, I'm just going to keep choosing
a big audacious giving goal that we commit to and that we hold ourselves to because it's
forcing us to then go out, earn the challenge of keeping up whatever we committed to as a giving goal.
So I'm telling you that leveraging the power of giving to other people will always come
back and help you out tenfold.
Wow, that is such an incredible story, but it makes perfect sense that once you are really committed
to that act, to the giving away the $50,000,
you're gonna do whatever it takes to find a way
to get it there.
That's a great story,
and I love that they were doing it
out of the goodness of their heart,
which I think is probably what opened up some of the doors
to allow them the success they found.
Right, let's go back to our logical sides.
Forget the wooest up for a minute.
When people see you giving, they're like,
oh, that's a good person.
I would like to help them.
So now it's a little bit easier to get a client
or now it's a little bit easier
to get some marketing advice, right?
It becomes a snowball in your favor.
And then when you start really giving, for example,
when you go to charity events,
who else is at charity events?
People with good hearts that have also done well
financially, hence why
they're at that table or why they're at that black tie event.
And so now you're networking his up level because it's not just successful people, but it's
good, hard and successful people.
And because they're a good, hard and successful people, of course, that means they're going
to be much more likely to help you collaborate on something and so on.
I'm telling you, it is literally one of the best secrets to success is
turn yourself into a giving machine
and then you're gonna be put into this cycle
of everybody giving back to everybody
because they recognize a fellow giver.
That's the best way that I've ever figured out
to get to somebody in business is to find,
how can I add value to them?
How can I give to them?
And the funny thing is a friend of mine,
a new friend of mine in the past year came to me and said, I want to help you. I want to help you get your message out
to more people. I'm going to, and he made some amazing contacts for me out of nowhere. And then
this week he needed a big favor and he left me this long message. And I just texted back, the answer
was already yes. Like you've given so much good to me. You don't need to justify or ask to say,
you need a favor and I'm here to help.
And I think so often we forget, we think,
what can I get out of this instead of if we lean
with what can I give in the situation?
How can I add value to this person
from the business pragmatic standpoint?
For me, that is the best single best way
for me to get to anybody in business.
Yeah, it really is.
People wanna help someone who helped them out.
So start tilting that law of rest of processing
in your favor now. Oh, that's a powerful one. Chris, give us the texting again,
because I think people are really going to want to get messages from you to help them up level
their thoughts around abundance and wealth. Yes, totally. Like, I'm not kidding. It's the
nerdy thing ever. I freaking love and people text me back how it changed your day. So text me the
word daily to 310-421-0416.
Like, its legit goes to my phone.
I text you each morning when I wake up
a positive perspective.
It's my favorite thing I do.
So again, text me the word daily to 310-421-0416.
Chris, thank you so much for your time.
Thank you so much for all of the advice
and abundance you are putting out into the universe.
I appreciate you and I appreciate you being here. No, I appreciate you having me on the show. Total privilege. Thank you.
Until next week, keep creating your confidence. I'm Jennifer Cohen, host the top ranking business and entrepreneur podcast, Habitson Hustle,
a part of the YAP media network, the number one business and self-improvement podcast network.
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