Crime in Sports - #211 - A Prodigy Of Criminal Behavior - The Unswervingness of Corey Dillon
Episode Date: June 2, 2020This week, we take a long look at a man who was no stranger to crime from an early age. From theft, to selling crack to an undercover officer, to punching women & chasing a man through th...e streets, holding a large stick... and that's all before he was even of legal age. With NFL success didn't come the end of his arrests, as he kept up a pretty solid record, throughout the years. This includes one of the sillier arrests in CIS history! It's Corey Dillon!! Sell crack to an undercover officer, chase people through the streets with a large stick, and always punch the driver of the car you're in with Corey Dillon!! Check us out, every Tuesday! We will continue to bring you the biggest idiots in sports history!! Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman Donate at... patreon.com/crimeinsports or with paypal.com using our email: crimeinsports@gmail.com Get all the CIS & STM merch at crimeinsports.threadless.com Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things CIS & STM!! Contact us on... twitter.com/crimeinsportscrimeinsports@gmail.comfacebook.com/Crimeinsportsinstagram.com/smalltownmurder# See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Leave her alone.
So, uh...
This is not a so.
This is a period.
Classic Judy.
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Judy Justice.
Only on Freebie. Hello and welcome to Crime and Sports!
Yay!
Yay indeed, Jimmy, yay indeed! My name is James Petrigal, I'm here with my co-host. Yay! Yay indeed, Jimmy. Yay indeed.
My name is James Petrigallo. I'm here with my co-host.
I am Jimmy Wissman.
Thank you folks so much, an immense amount, for joining us again this week.
Once again, hope you enjoyed last week the tribute to Lenny Dykstra's Two Years of Freedom.
That was a good time had by all.
Two Years of Freedom, and if you'd have started working on it the day he got arrested you would have just finished it just finished perfect so much work it was it was
a lot of editing and all that and a lot of work from sarah and adam getting people to call in
and everything and uh if you enjoyed that i have to do say everybody athletes out there who we've
covered if you're listening because we found out a lot more of you guys listen than we had
anticipated yeah you're kind of under the radar but you listen so anybody out there if we've done an episode on you
and you not if you're a zoom off okay so you if you've touched a kid or like beat the shit out
of your wife five times we don't want to talk to you probably but if you like had like a drug
problem and you had some shit and whatever we don't care yeah we're we've had problems ourselves
all of our friends are
fucked up it's no problem you want to talk to us well we'll talk to you too and we'll be nice to
you in two years ryan leaf yeah no he just reset because then it'll it'll it'll it'll reset again
and i said i called ryan everyone's like hey look riley's doing good no i said no give him time no
he's he's he's just you could see it in his eyes you could see it he was just biting his time the whole time
he was good now he it every second of that time was i gotta go out and do something i go out and
do something i gotta go out and do it like you could see it in his eyes fuck him the thing that
i saw was just it's very much like quitting cigarettes anytime somebody goes how'd you quit
cigarettes you just put in my mind that i want a cigarette right now exactly and every time he's
out there every day talking about,
this is how I quit oxys,
this is how I quit oxys.
And his head is like,
I want oxys.
So tell us about your painkiller addiction.
What did it feel like?
Oh, good.
It's great!
How did it feel to be on 30 oxys at the same time? How did that feel?
You know, I miss it.
Is that okay?
Do you feel better now
that you're completely stone sober,
can feel all your aches and pains? You feel better, you feel better though as a person does your wife ever annoy you
because you just want that shit and you just fly off the handle and punch her so never has ever
happened never never i don't know i guess it's just me so anyway open invitation unless unless
you're unless you're a real dickhead and you can tell if we liked you or not on the show
if we if we were like i'll fuck this guy then probably not but if we liked you or not on the show. If we were like, fuck this guy, then probably not.
But if we were like, yeah, I'm kind of rooting for this guy, then sure.
Come on.
If we used the phrase, we were rooting for him, we probably still do.
That's the thing.
That's how it works there.
So thank you for that.
This week, wild episode.
Crime right off the bat.
This is one where we get out of the gate hot.
No waiting on it or anything like that.
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You'll have to stay on the fucking lake of the Ozarks.
Yeah, for five fucking minutes, please.
So we could have
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Yeah, yeah. That's one of those things.
That's not... We're not trying to get
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Here's the deal. We'd like to have live shows.
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Do you understand how much fucking work that is to get from?
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one-time donation that said let's get started let's do it let's do this we had to you know
clear out some house cleaning at the top of the show.
What are you going to do with that?
So let's get into it.
Our star of the day here, it's Corey Dillon.
Okay.
You remember Corey Dillon, Jimmy?
The running back for the Bengals and the Patriots.
He's a Super Bowl champion.
Right.
He's, let's talk about, he's had an interesting life, Corey Dillon here.
Yeah, very interesting life.
Corey James Dillon is his full name here.
CJ, yeah.
He doesn't go by CJ.
A lot of running backs go by CJ.
They do.
And OJ.
Yeah.
Simpson, Anderson.
There's a lot of J.
Yeah, there's a lot of J.
There's TJs, too?
TJ?
Yeah.
TJ Duckett?
Running backs, yeah.
TJ Duckett.
Running backs short CJ Spillman.
Yeah.
TJ Duckett.
Why are the running backs always shortening their name?
How did I do that?
You pulled TJ Duckett out of your ass? How did I do that? You pulled T.J. Duckett out of your ass?
How did I do that?
That's pretty impressive, Jimmy.
Good job.
Who did he play for?
The Expos?
Eagles?
He played for the Royals, I think.
The Philadelphia Expos.
Yeah, the Philadelphia Expos.
Then he was traded to the...
Damn it, I almost said it, but they're an actual team.
The Denver Blue Jays.
I was going to say the Montreal Royals, but that used to be an actual minor league team.
God damn it.
Never mind.
All right. I was going to say the Montreal Royals, but that used to be an actual minor league team. God damn it. Never mind. Anyway, October 24th, 1974, Corey Dillon is born in Seattle, Washington.
Born and raised in Seattle, which I didn't know.
I didn't know he was a Seattle guy.
I don't think I can think of anybody that grew up in Seattle that played sports.
Well, we did Jeremy Stevens.
Oh.
Like, what, a few weeks, a month ago or something.
Jeremy Stevens went to UW.
I think he was from Jeremy Stevens went to UW.
I think he was from Idaho and moved to Washington.
So he grew up in Washington, too.
But this is Seattle time here.
So 74 he's born.
His mother's name is Jarlene.
Single mom.
And he's got two older brothers, too.
He's the youngest of three. So he's got Charlie and Curtis are his older brothers.
So Charlie, Curtis, and Corey.
Went hard with the C's on that one. She loves them one she likes the seas that's that's what she did here but
uh cory knew his father saw him from time to time semi-regular basis is kind of how it's described
not you know not as best not exactly every weekend but he was you know probably showed up for a game
or two and maybe graduations and things like that. So he knew his father and stuff.
So that's, I guess, sort of.
Probably called him by his first name.
Yeah, you know.
Yeah, what's up there?
How you doing, Chuck?
Yeah, what's up, Chuck?
How you doing?
Good to see you.
I'm his dad.
They shook hands kind of awkwardly like two guys at the plant, you know,
work in different departments but remember each other from the Christmas party.
Chuck, right?
Good, okay. Nice to see you. Good to see you. Good to see you. Your wife and kids. work in different departments but remember each other from the christmas party chuck right good
okay nice to see you good to see you wife and yeah your wife and kids how they doing yeah right i
remember that three boys right okay it's kind of where we're at here i think with cory and his dad
but jerlene did a did her best jerlene hangs in there and jerlene she Jolene, she's a hard worker, and she tries hard to raise three kids on her own in the 70s, which is in the late 60s and 70s, which is not easy times at all for anybody because the economy was in the shits anyway.
And you throw in just being poor to begin with.
If you start a race and you're poor, you're back anyway.
But if it's a bad economy, too, you're not only back five slots, if you're if it's a bad economy too you're not only back
five slots but you're also like underground three stories you have to climb out first and then
fucking run from behind so it's not easy everybody else already started it's not easy yeah it's it's
everyone else is kind of a little buried in a bad economy but you're fucking who's that hello
hello hello down there yeah you're you're down there. It's in the cadaver dogs.
Oh, shit.
They lived in the Capitol Hill District, which at the time back then was kind of a shit area.
I don't know what it's like in Seattle now, but things change.
I imagine that's downtown, right?
I don't know.
Seattle's one of those places where I feel like if you've been there, it looks like they
pretty much demolished the city and rebuilt it in like 2004.
Yeah.
Like once Frazier wrapped up, they're like, you know what?
Everybody really expects this place to be nice.
We should really make it nice.
And it could have been nice for longer.
I don't know.
But that's everything looks newish there.
It's a weird fucking place.
Very few chipped sidewalks.
Exactly.
It's very nice.
Yeah.
It all looks like a set.
Yeah.
It all looks like like a like a movie set or TV set on a sitcom when you see them walking down a
city street that's on a back lot.
That's what all of Seattle's a big back lot.
Seattle, America's back lot.
That's what it fucking looks like.
Ken Griffey retired and they finally had enough money to build a real city.
That's what it was.
They're like, between Ken Griffey and Frazier, we can do this.
We've got it all.
We've built it.
We've built it was. They're like, between Ken Griffey and Frasier, we can do this. We've got it all. We've built it. We've built it all.
So, Corey is known.
See, this is the thing about Corey.
Corey's known throughout his childhood as he's a follower, as a lot of little brothers are, because they're used to following their brothers.
So, psychologically, it kind of works for them.
But everyone says he's a nice kid.
He's, you know, not a dick dick he doesn't treat his mom bad he's not a he's not a bad person but he definitely gets in
with a shit crowd and ends up doing a lot of dumb things i know plenty of people like that so that
happens and that's that's understandable he is into sports early though that's one of the things
for cory he's always a good at sports because as an athlete, I mean, you can watch him play,
and that's not something that would be hidden.
You would recognize that right away.
He's a kid that when he's nine, he'd have been way better than all the other nine-year-olds.
Bigger, stronger, faster, and kind of just has a different edge to him.
So Corey here, his brothers are both good at sports.
They're both kind of into sports
so it makes it easy for cory to want to be into sports and his brothers got him into football
on his seventh birthday i guess they said now you can play football i don't know if that was the
pop warner peewee i think cut off or well as far as i remember it's six right i have no idea i
don't remember and especially i don't know in
the 70s what it was in the 70s you could probably put a three-year-old in the helmet and stick them
out there and be like i mean it's full tackle but uh he's been chewing on uh liver it's good for
him though i think it toughens him up see they've scientists have found the problem you know how
like your hands are soft let me feel very soft but let's say you went out and you know uh hoed
a field for say say, six months.
Your hands would be very calloused.
So what you got to do is, at this age, their brains, see, they're still sloshing around in there.
Their head's too big.
So you want to get it bouncing off the skull in different directions.
Now, you get a good callous on it.
That way, later on, they get hit by a bigger guy.
It doesn't even hurt them.
They don't even notice it.
It's just calloused over. They're like now there's boom right off the bat see that's
what you got to do calloused that brain up once you get that brain calloused up that and also you
don't drink water during practice because that used to also be a thing that they did in football
was toughening you up like bum phillips playbook or something? Because that sounds like something they would say.
Yeah.
I guarantee you somebody back in the day said the kids got to get hit in the head a lot early so they get used to it.
I guarantee you that's been said to some parent who was worried.
Is it bad for them to get hit in the head like that as a kid?
Nah, it's good for them.
No, they got to bounce around a few times.
It builds up some calluses.
That way they're not little pussies.
It's like brain broccoli. Yeah. You know know what i'm saying that's what it is i think you know what happened unbelievable you know what fucking happened man
they did tell us cigarettes were good for us yeah they told us imagine they were
imagine cigarettes were good for us let's live in a fantasy world the best i know a lot of people they don't smell right but if you've ever smoked a cigarette after like like pasta and
sauce or an unbelievable steak yeah and a bottle or you know other things it's it's yeah it's pretty
good so what i'm saying is if cigarettes were good for us oh what a great society we live in
if you could make a cigarette that's good for you, but still
packed with nicotine, I think that we could
really do something. The doctor's recommending
it. Oh, that'd be amazing. I wouldn't imagine
if you went to the doctor
and they do your whole thing and go, I'd like to see you up to about
a half a pack a day. I gotta be honest.
I'd like to see you try a little
harder, get up to about a half, maybe 15
cigarettes a day, something like that, but at least a half
a pack. I mean, come on. Next time you come in, I want to hear half a wisman wheeze i want to hear some
reason i want to hear yeah your lungs are pretty clear i don't like that i want a good rattly cough
i would love that that'd be amazing that'll tell me you're virile yeah what are you up to about two
packs a day all right look at you wow i can hear like, my throat hurts. It hurts to smoke that much. Yeah, but it's callusing.
That's what you do.
You callus it like a toddler's brain.
You have to do it early.
That's why when your kids are young, you've got to make them smoke.
Make sure they have access to your cigarettes.
It's callusing.
You callus them.
That's what you do as a child.
That way they'll be able to smoke more when they're an adult.
They can really get a good... Lose your tonsils, you pussy. Yeah, come on. Get a good callus them. That's what you do as a child. That way they'll be able to smoke more when they're an adult. Right. They can really get a good...
Did you lose your tonsils, you pussy?
Yeah, come on.
Get a good callus going.
You know, getting your tonsils out is good because then as you smoke, you can really
fill those holes in with callus.
Oh, yeah.
You want to really toughen them up.
I mean, you play some football and you smoke a couple packs a day before kindergarten,
I think you're going to be good.
You're going to live to 110.
You're going to be like leather.
Walking around like Burgess Meredith
in Grumpy Old Men.
And for dinner, I eat a half pound of bacon.
And I usually drink my lunch the other way around.
Your doctor's comparing you to leather,
talking about,
when was the last time you bought a belt, huh?
See how long leather lasts? Favorably. like i mean leather lasts a long time i've had
these shoes since my bar mitzvah so they get better they're pretty nice have them resold
they still work they look great they feel better that's what i mean so you want to last
what do you want to be all wrapped in plastic out there all pure falling apart all pink and pure no get the hell out of
here so uh they get him into football and we're talking just like in the front yard there's some
you know a little bit of lawn out in the street they're playing football there's no real access to
a major field or anything like that but everybody says that charlie and curtis beat the shit at
akari they showed him no mercy yeah no mercy as you have to do with a little brother right you or anything like that. But everybody says that Charlie and Curtis beat the shit out of Corey.
They showed him no mercy.
No mercy, as you have to do with a little brother.
If you're playing basketball, block that shot.
Let him know that you've got to get around it.
That's how you do it.
Let him see that I'm taller and he has to shoot over me.
Exactly.
You're not getting better.
Yeah, exactly.
So that's what they did.
And they said they treated him like anybody else that was in their football games of their own age and beat the piss out of him.
Fucking kid.
And he was probably the easiest target because he was younger.
So people probably went out of their way to hit him hard.
So but he they said that the first time he ever had a ball in his hand, he went the wrong direction.
Yeah.
So because he was seven as it happened.
And basically his brothers beat the shit out of him for it.
So he never did it again.
That was that.
Very interesting.
Unbelievable.
But to counteract these older children beating the hell out of him all the time in football,
he decided that he needed to learn how to work out, get stronger and bigger, counteract this shit.
So he started doing 200 pushups and 200 sit ups every day.
That's a child for a child. That's a and 200 sit-ups every day that's a child
for a child that's a lot yeah that's a that's a lot a child it's a lot for us 39 i wish i could
do that but yeah for a child that's that's a pretty strenuous workout for a nine-year-old
or something but within you know after over his high school or junior high years and everything
in late elementary school he starts really developing into a physical
force and good at football too
because he's been playing with older kids for a while, so that
helped him also. And he's the type
of guy, as a runner, he's the type of
guy who isn't trying to go around you
at all. He's lower
in his shoulder and you better want
to hit because he's going to hit you.
So yeah, it's a lot of those running backs,
those Earl Campbell types that said, I'm going to deliver a hit rather than you know avoid
it yeah jeremy smith's who would always avoid they'd glance off a hit that's how he lasted so
long then you'd have your guys like this that just lowered the shoulder and you know wanted you to be
intimidated by him having the ball so but he was really really really really into football their house is within walking
distance of where the u of uw plays really so yeah husky husky stadium there so that's you know
they're real into it i mean if it's within walking distance you can hear cheers yeah so fireworks if
you can hear cheers see fireworks and see crowds and shit you get into that stuff so he was very
into it as well uh he plays baseball and football too
he's a really good center fielder with some pop in his bat as well really he's a two sport guy
by the age of 13 he's playing baseball he's playing football it's 1987 grace
this is grace the man the man's a champion and this is grace grace yeah it is it really is jesus for uh
yeah he's at this point what have you done cory quite a bit cory's had quite the run of it let's
just say yeah cory's uh no it's not an there's no accident here some of the guys are like ah if he
just wasn't there you know maybe that wouldn't happen no cory some people find trouble cory's like you ever watch like the heathcliff cartoon
and there's a big fight and it's just a cloud that moves that's cory's walking in the middle
and there's a cloud that you can never see him because it's just a trouble cloud that he just
walks with all the time around him cory's got problems let's just say and i mean cory being the
youngest and being uh being also in a situation where if you're not that if your supervision
is lacking a little bit because you know your mother has to work a lot so you can eat food
and have rent and you know lights on and shit right you tend to fuck up a lot and this is like
a lot of my friends growing up
did stupid shit like this because their families sucked.
Or their families just couldn't keep an eye on them
because they had other concerns or other things going on
or work or other kids or whatever the fuck.
And I feel like that's kind of Corey's thing here.
He slips kind of under the cracks,
which he's playing sports and doing things like that.
He's doing all the things he should be doing,
but then on his off hours,
he's cutting up like crazy, going nuts.
And he's got two big brothers who will defend him
and fix things that don't require the cops, obviously.
And he's not scared, too.
He's a big dude.
On the street, he feels like he's formidable
because for kids his age, he's a big son of a bitch,
and it also makes older kids.
A lot of the kids, if you're bigger,
we've had this a few times, if you're bigger at a young age the older kids will take you under
their wing a little bit more and it makes you kind of you always end up hanging out with older kids
and they tend to make the younger kids do the dumb shit that gets them arrested instead of
the older kids so that's what that's kind of the way i see some of this shit going down for Corey. Now, a lot of these early things came from a book that I found this information.
Really, it was the only place that had it,
and they went through juvenile records and the whole deal.
It's a book called Pros and Cons, Criminals Who Play in the NFL
by Jeff Benedict and Don Yeager.
So they did a crazy job of research on people's criminal records,
and they were like you
know talking to players wives and having them like it's wild from the nfl only that's all they covered
that's in this book yeah it's a thick book and they cover like not everybody obviously they said
this isn't even the tip of the iceberg but this is like some crazy shit it was like i don't know
four or five years ago it was before we started this there was a there was an article out that had like like 40 percent of the uh of the players in the nfl had
a criminal record like 40 that's that seems high i mean it's it does it seems high it does seem high
it's a lot i don't see many uh like dentist reports where they're like uh 40 of dentists
are criminals you know what i mean that's high for a particular profession i'd also like to know when those are from because that's the thing like current problem you have to separate like the
kid shit from the what i take it like this way once there's like newspaper articles about how
great you are at that point it's on you yeah yeah literally at that point i'm not i'm not your
background and all that shit doesn't matter because you are going to, if anything, get out of shit easier, no matter who you are.
You know what I'm saying?
Whether you buy it or somebody else buys it.
Whatever it is.
Or even if you're a player and you're a professional and you're wealthy, you are treated differently by the police than a regular person.
Absolutely. person absolutely we've talked about this out of all our people that have done you know our people
crime and sports subjects that have done crazy shit in front of the police right that would get
any normal person shot fucking 40 times we've had very few people get shot on this show and we're
talking every color every size because they're fucking professional athletes and they're notarized
they have notoriety and they have money.
And that's exactly the difference.
So we always have to separate the young arrests from the old arrests.
Because when they're older, I feel like whatever they're getting arrested for, they probably got away with five times.
Right.
They probably were caught and let go three fucking times for every time they're actually arrested for it.
Like DUI.
You know how many athletes get let go for fucking DUI?
And how many don't even get arrested or pulled over?
It's harder now because of body cams and shit.
But like 10, 20 years ago, hey, blah, blah, blah.
They used to give tickets.
Mr. Barkley, get home, please.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
How many times do you think Charles Barkley got pulled over in Scottsdale?
A lot of you.
Grace, forget it.
And he has goddamn multiple DUIs.
And Mark Grace, forget it. Yeah, and he has, god damn, multiple DUIs.
So, December 7th, 1987, Corey is, do that math, 13 years old.
13.
He is indicted on the charge of possessing stolen property.
Indicted at seventh grade.
That's just fancy word for they're going to put charges on him.
But still, he's 13 years old.
And that's a thing of possessing stolen property. don't know if older kids had him who knows what the
fuck happened i know a million kids who stole a ton of shit at 13 so i mean i don't hold that
against anybody i'll bet that that if that was a profession being a 13 year old i'll bet that's
80 percent are criminals that's the thing it's hard yeah you're what didn't you do wrong at 13 oh god
i was a terrible child i wasn't good at all so i i'm okay with that and then the next year uh
december 5th 1988 he's charged with theft in the third degree okay so that's 13 and 14 years old
he's he's building his resume but i mean like i said that's kiddie shit that's a theft could be
he could have stole a
snickers bar we have no fucking idea it could have been a head of lettuce because mom didn't have it
we have no clue it could have been anything that that could literally be a stupid shoplifting thing
which kids do that a lot boy oh boy yeah come on so february 11th 1989 uh according to this
indictment here though this, this is interesting.
February 11th, 1989, he he was arrested for.
Well, let's quote from the indictment.
Unlawfully, unlawfully and feloniously did have in his possession with intent to manufacture or deliver a certain controlled substance and a narcotic to wit cocaine.
So this was this was crack busts here.
This was he's literally selling crack on the street and he's 14 at uh he's not even 15 yet yeah he's he's almost 15 so yeah and he's selling
crack here apparently uh an officer an undercover cop on the seattle police force was in the
downtown area attempting to make drug busts and drug purchases and busts from street dealers.
9.30, he was approached by Corey Dillon and two other males.
In exchange for cash, he gave the officer a small brown envelope containing crack.
So he got crack there.
At 9.35, uniformed officers who were working with him arrested Dillon and the two guys.
While they were frisking him all of them they
discovered three additional rocks uh of of him uh of three additional cocaine rocks here in his
underwear so he stuffed him down his pants too they really were thorough so he was having yeah
smoking some crack here he's selling some crack here on the street at a young age that's young
but usually when people uh sell crack when they're 14 yeah it's usually not
like it's they're not they're not like you know what i'm gonna do they didn't have the idea that's
what i'm saying like that's influenced for sure a there's a reason they usually there's some sort
of reason kids that are comfortable generally don't sell crack at 14 on the street to undercover
officers number one and number two yeah there's a there's a like
you said there's a there's something here like not their idea probably i'm gonna say like go
out on a limb here he wasn't playing video games and turned on tv and saw there's a crack epidemic
and was like how do i get involved you know what yeah i saw it like it was like microsoft
starting to take off in the 90s like he's like look at this so facebook's going public a like the that wasn't a
thing wasn't he x building them out of his garage 14 i don't yeah i can help i can do this he is in
seattle he's he knew everything he was in on everything so you know when a guy's selling
crack on the street to undercover officers at 14 i i gotta i gotta kind of give him the benefit
of the doubt there if something is wrong and he's 14 and, you know, he shouldn't even be outside at 930 at night downtown at 14.
He certainly shouldn't be hanging out with anybody that tells him what that shit is yet.
That's what I mean.
He shouldn't, A, know what crack is enough to sell it.
Right.
And, B, he shouldn't be outside at that time.
And, C, obviously selling crack to anyone.
Even if he knows what it is.
Yeah.
Because, I mean.
Yeah, you're going to know.
That time, everybody knew what the fuck it everybody did yeah but to know the the value of the weight is fucking crazy yeah that's crazy it's a little much it's a little much and to have it right
broken down and in your underwear jolene get up get a handle on yeah there's somebody somebody
needs to get a hand or two older brothers too christ crack some skulls here so uh 11 january 11th 1990 he's arrested again here um so i mean he's
this is a pretty good childhood of of arrests this incident here he apparently was chasing a man and with a large stick cory had a large stick chasing a man down the street
uh swinging it at him threatening saying he was going to kill him with the stick trying to beat
this man with a giant stick while he ran around in the street away from him there and apparently
that's when the police arrived and at that point it said that he was charged with a substantial
risk of death or physical injury creating one to the man he was charged with a substantial risk of death or physical injury
creating one to the man he was chasing swinging a stick in the street and also uh he they said
that he obstructed the police officer and resisting arrest as well because he ran away yeah that wasn't
a violent or resist it was a i probably dropped the stick and ran away when the cop got there
then they charged him with resisting for running away so So, yeah, but he was chasing a man in the street with a stick.
Making threats of murder.
Really actively trying to hit him with it, apparently.
Like, it was a real situation.
Apparently, Corey was fucking going a little off on him here.
As a child.
Oh, yeah.
He's not even 16 yet.
He's 15 years old.
This man played in the NFL.
Oh, yeah.
Well, they didn't give him any sticks in the NFL, though, unfortunately. He would have been a Hall's 15 years old. This man played in the NFL. Oh, yeah.
Well, they didn't give him any sticks in the NFL, though, unfortunately.
He would have been a Hall of Famer if he had a stick, I think.
That's the difference.
If he could have carried the ball with one hand and swung a big stick in front of him with the other,
I feel like he's unstoppable at that point.
I'll kill you, motherfucker.
I'll kill you, motherfucker.
Holy shit, no one's tackling him.
So January 19, 1990.
This is a week later. he's in court for the drug
charges from the year before so a week before he has court for the one thing he has the stick
incident as well so it's he's busy he's a busy young man yeah in addition to this he's also
playing sports and shit so it's very busy uh so this is court for the drug charges he's he was ordered by the court to serve 10 days
detention undergo nine months of state supervision perform 40 hours of community service i assume
picking things up with one of those sticks right you're good with a stick young man
and having no use or possession of drugs or alcohol which i mean he's 15 he shouldn't anyway
so that's fine that should that goes without
saying it should be a very easy sentence to yeah complete and it goes without saying you're not
allowed to drink anyway you're 15 so he was a juvenile so that made him you know whatever that
was why he's got sentenced to so little apparently as those same charges as an adult would have
carried uh 22 to 27 months in state prison wow so yeah they gave him a break
because he's which they should he's a kid right he's uh you know clearly he is a child so you can
still correct this behavior i believe yeah i mean and he does end up in the nfl so i mean christ
almighty for him it went as good as it could have right but given the right circumstances it's
pretty uh a deterrent for that shouldn't be so difficult.
Yeah.
That's kind of like, yeah, from from this shit.
Don't sell crack and beat people.
Should be fairly easy to turn a 14 year old away from that life.
Just something about beating people with sticks in the street.
I feel like if you're going to someone to reason with them, you're like, listen, I I mean, you know you can't beat people with sticks in the street, right?
They go, oh, yeah, I mean, Jesus, that's got a point there.
A normal person would just be like, yeah, that's true.
But it sounds like Corey would be like, I can't.
Yeah, well, even Corey might be like, so inside I should do it then, right?
That way they can't get away and no one will see.
Thanks, dude.
Thank you.
Good looking out.
See, this is why I need, I'm young right i need people to guide me who needs some help get me better at this shit
so march 30th 1990 we all need somebody jesus christ so march 30th 1990 is the actual court
for the obstructing of a police officer and uh the state agrees to drop
the charges against him for reckless endangerment and with the guilty plea and all that sort of
shit and uh like we said before the wait is over so far you're not losing the only thing you're
losing is my patience quickly i see that the queen of the courtroom is back. I didn't do anything.
You wouldn't know the truth if it came up and slapped you in the face.
I see he's not intimidated by anything.
I can fix that.
New cases.
She wanted to fight me.
Leave her alone.
Okay, so, um...
This is not a so. This is a period.
Classic Judy. Did you sleep with her? Yes not a so. This is a period. Classic Judy.
Did you sleep with her?
Yes, Your Honor.
You married his cousin.
His brother.
That's not him.
Yes, ma'am.
I would make a beeline for the door.
The Emmy Award-winning series returns.
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So July 31, 1990.
He is having a busy year.
He is arrested again. This apparently uh he was apparent i don't know what he was arrested for but he's arrested for uh for hindering an officer
and resisting arrest so i don't know what the fuck that could literally be anything like that could
be the way cops fuck with kids on the street that could uh that could be what you call
a humble basically where they just took you in because they you were fucking you were quote i
fucking them while they were trying to fucking talk to you or some shit like that that's that's
some shit like that's what cops say to fucking kids when they're looking at them while they're
talking to them you i fucking are you talking to me yeah i guess i am i don't know what do you want
for me so yeah that
could be behind your back yeah that could be anything and then they could have said okay well
we're gonna take you in on this and he could have said fuck that tried to run away or something so
we don't know he's still a child here but he is arrested for that now uh november he's in court
there and he's convicted of obstructing a police officer and resisting arrest and uh doesn't really get anything for
probation really got him i don't like to be i fucked you know it's so it is shocking down
that this man this child has gone from this to get into high school and be impressive enough to
go to college yeah no it's unbelievable that's the thing about cory that you have to admire is this
dude like yes he does and we're going to talk
about it he's got some silver-haired people out there pulling for him but at the same time he also
has to put in a certain amount of work to get where he needs to go and the way his story unfolds
he could have very easily given up and nobody would have blamed him and he persisted and there's
something to that where you have to admire somebody's persistence and you have to admire somebody's perseverance.
Yeah.
Even if they're a fuck up, like it doesn't matter.
That's the accomplishes things that are difficult to do based on a lot of will, personal will and desire.
So I have to give him a lot of credit against odds.
Even he's got a coach here named Al Roberts.
And this man will be silver for cory
for yeah so that's like the the old coach's way of like horny for someone they're silver for him
man he's super silver for you chief he's silver for cory from a young age and right up until the
nfl like you'll see i don't know if he follows he follows Corey or Corey follows him or he gets hired because he knows Corey and whatever it is.
But he ends up where Corey is a lot.
We'll find out here.
And now Roberts here.
He's from Seattle.
Al Roberts.
He's a coach.
And he's the running backs coach later on at the University of Washington.
He'll also be at a smaller school that Corey played for.
But basically, his son played against cory in high school and he says
roberts quote i assume the role of a surrogate father to cory at washington later on at college
i took him under my wing cory came in nice and soft and he took me on as a dear friend and father
figure and he needed help and i needed to help him so that's what he says he needed help and i
needed i needed to he needed help and i needed someone very talented to latch myself on to, to fucking climb up the rankings.
He needed help and I needed a pool.
Yeah, I really needed to not be a running backs coach for a fucking...
Yeah, for a high school.
For a non-top 20 program.
That's what I need.
That's what I'm talking about here.
I need to be in the NFL.
So June 8th, 1992.
This is very interesting.
He is going to be later on indicted for second-degree malicious mischief on this one.
Now, Michelle Reed, who's his former girlfriend at the time, as a 16, 17-year-old here,
she reported to police on June 8th, 1992 that cory confronted her and some friends
apparently she drove to an ampm gas station to fill up her tank it was just after midnight
and apparently cory didn't like that for some reason you bitch according to this how dare you
what are you using regular unleaded you cheap bitch at least put the mid-grade in the thing's
gonna run choppy what the f**k gas couldn't you find a chevron man jesus give me a couple of those
burgers though they're gross but i want to eat them oh my god so according to what she said uh
dylan came up to her car and began berating her and her girlfriends who were in the car
i don't know if
it was their gas choice or what it was but he was not having any of it eating a roller grill that
you pig repeat well repeatedly this might give insight repeatedly referring to them all as quote
bitches in the police report all you bitches and you're a bitch and all you bitches so he nailed
it right he was throwing bitch around a lot apparently uh he started an argument with her presumably by calling her and
her friends bitches i would assume that they said no we're not that you know it's weird
if your girlfriend wife whoever if they're in a anywhere really hanging out and you come up and
you start yelling at them calling them all bitches you're gonna have an argument usually i would say with at least one of them especially your girlfriend yeah so not a wise
decision gentlemen i didn't know if he needed that advice but if you did you really need it so
solid advice i promise it's solid never do it so then she called him a bitch back what so he she said i'm not a bitch you're a bitch yeah so man bitch way worse
than a woman yeah he not okay with this he apparently ripped the driver's side door open
here and started threatening her and uh he said quote what what challenging her and she said quote
i didn't ever say anything and he said yeah that's what I thought. So he basically got all up in her business in the doorway.
You say that shit again, like a guy in a nightclub would say to another guy.
Fucked you say to me?
I didn't say nothing.
That's right, motherfucker.
No?
You don't treat your teenage girlfriend like that.
What are you doing?
Any age, but especially not then
so it's the same argument before every ufc fight it's what it is that's what except i don't think
she's gonna tell i don't think she's up for the title no that's the difference so then uh he
closed the door and while they were still in the car he quote v quote, vandalized it. I don't know.
They were in the car while he was doing shit to the outside of the car, which is probably terrifying to these girls, I would assume.
More than $700 damage was done before Corey stopped and threatened to throw a large rock through the windshield.
So that was that.
So that happened.
Yeah.
So he's arrested for that.
Obviously, she went to the police that night, filled out a police report.
All of her friends filled out a police report because, you know, he did this not only at
the a.m. p.m. with like surveillance cameras and everything, but in front of multiple witnesses
that were also in the car terrified.
So probably not the smartest way to go about this thing.
Now, this charge in September is ultimately reduced to third degree felony malicious mischief.
And he is sentenced to perform community service, undergo counseling, attend anger management classes, and pay restitution to his ex-girlfriend's mother who owns the car for fixing it.
So basically, slap on the wrist.
Don't do that again.
You're a bad guy so in terms
of danger to society and people uh his crimes are certainly escalating they're asking that's
the thing it started out with okay drug sales whatever that's not violent drug sales like i
said i don't know what your financial situation is and whatever and you're 14 i'm not gonna get
in on anybody's shit for drugs uh at all but for chasing a man with a stick that i mean
you don't know what that man did maybe he owes him money might owe or the guy who knows maybe
he was defending somebody else i'll even give you the stick i'll give you that he caught him raping
a child and he chased that's what i'm saying you never could have said get that get your dick out
of that infant and then fucking chased him with the stick and got arrested at that point you know
what cory good for you you're in the right so i'm not gonna give him the stick. And got arrested. At that point, you know what, Corey?
Good for you.
You're in the right.
So I'm going to give him the stick even.
I'll give him the stick.
I'll give him the resisting arrest
because the cops say that shit a lot of times
so they can charge somebody with something
if they don't fucking like him.
So you know what?
Fine.
Especially if they know Corey
and know he's a neighborhood fucking knucklehead.
We can sweep it.
I'm giving you all those, Corey.
I'm giving them to you i
really am clean record yeah not this no you can't go up to your girlfriend all her friends start
calling them bitches threaten them physically and then vandalize their car while they're inside
like it's some sort of demented car detailing service no no you stay in the car i got it i'll
wax it out here i'm buffing this den out with my shoe. Yes.
Bang, bang.
Come out the other side.
So through all this, we're this far into it.
We really not mentioned football or sports or anything.
It's just been 40 minutes of juvenile crime.
And he's definitely a bad guy already.
It's not going well for him.
But in football, he goes to two different high schools.
Later years, I think junior, senior year, he goes to Franklin High high schools later years i think junior senior year he
goes to franklin high school which a lot of people went to franklin including uh baseball hall of
famer ron santo no kidding the cubs there and kenny g what the the uh weird yeah
what is that it's a weird saxophone alto or tenor it's one of the two i don't know one of
them's a regular sax and then he's got the weird he's got the artsy fart clarinetty sax whatever
the fuck that is curly shit at the top it's a little fluty sax it's a weird looking thing
clinton one no no it's it's not it's not like a yeah there's never been like a
maybe i don't know but it might be the best person like a rock and right like a jab
he's not that shit no he might be the best person. It's not like a rocking, like a jam. Right, right. None of that shit, no.
He might be the best one that plays it because fucking nobody else plays it.
Nobody else, because it just goes.
Right.
No one else really cares about that.
He said, that's all I'm going to do.
Right.
I'm going to corner the market.
No one's doing this.
No one.
Right.
And they were like, yeah yeah that's true i guess
sure i mean record it if you want to i guess you're really long you should do that it's curly
you look like a muppet it's fine so just yeah that's fine do that put a suit on there you go
any anything any any gray and baggy don't make it don't let it fit go nuts yeah any instrument
that makes your nose look smaller that would work you can do that you can hide it behind it right make sure to go up with the angle
so they don't see anything so uh yeah they all went to franklin as well this is where i don't
know how he has time to play two sports and be fucking up this much but he does he's like i said
playing football playing center baseball also playing center. He's got good pop in his bat.
He makes the all Metro team in baseball, as a matter of fact.
So good in baseball.
He is that in 1993, the 1993 Major League Baseball draft.
He is drafted by the San Diego Padres in the 34th round.
So that's how good of a baseball player he is.
That's a high round, but you're still a goddamn.
That just shows that they're like, wow, what an athlete that guy is.
If we can get him to concentrate on baseball, he might be something.
So they draft a lot of the two sport guys lower because they don't know what they're going to do.
They don't know whether they're going to go to college and play football or they're going to sign and play baseball.
So he does not sign for baseball, though.
It's 34th round.
You're not getting any money or anything.
You're basically getting on a bus to a small town. And you're going to go
play AAA for a while. Enjoy. And you're at
the bottom of the list.
You'd have to really be a superstar
for anybody to notice you.
The problem
is also, though, out of high school,
he's great at football, but
he does not meet the NCAA
minimum academic requirements.
And also, he's been arrested a shitload.
So he's a proven dummy in terms of school.
Yeah.
And proven dummy in terms of arrest record.
In terms of doing things.
So they're like, hmm, if you're a college, you're looking at him going, talent, yes.
But doesn't have the grades, A, to legally play here.
And fucking B b he might be
arrested at any point he could chase somebody with a stick we don't know pretty useless he
chased people with a stick and we're gonna put a heavy one in his hands that's so what are we nuts
no let's let's leave the stick at home so a lot of times though guys like this this will happen a
lot guys like this will have to go in through like a junior college program and prove that they're
not a knucklehead for a couple of years.
Look at me.
I cannot get arrested and still play really well and pass all my classes or do whatever.
So then they can go to it that way.
Then an athletic director at a college can justify bringing him in in case something happens.
No one will blame it on them and go, well, he went to the junior college and was fine for two years.
It's not my fault.
God forbid.
So anyway, he was scaring colleges off basically
he ended up looking for a community college he wanted to improve his grades and try to get his
reputation better they look at me i went to community college and got good grades now
look at me i'm a i'm a citizen right you can have me here but uh uh so he started at edmunds
community college which was a 90 minute bus ride from Seattle.
I don't know why he picked that college, but after six weeks he quit.
Yeah.
He got tired of going on a bus for an hour and a half each direction.
That's horrible.
That sucks.
Do that at six in the morning.
That sucks.
So he quit and basically he did nothing job wise for about a year.
Yeah.
He hung around after high school.
This is Dennis rodman style
like just having had no nothing no college no anything just hanging around in football you
never hear about this very football they got to be like in the program you know basketball you can
but not football so he does nothing eventually jerlene convinces him to get a job as a night
janitor same same as dennis rodman yeah because that's a
entry level you don't need experience and if you kick ass yeah clean the toilet anybody you got
clean the toilet at three in the morning isn't something you can really fuck up that bad
you know so anybody with you don't need a big work a big resume for that no one's like i don't know
not i see you're a cfo of uh dial corp but I'm not sure if you can get our shitter clean at 3 a.m. when no one's here.
How much scrubbing bubbles do you possess?
Yeah.
So he hates that fucking job.
Of course he does.
Yeah, obviously.
So what else does he do during that year that he's out?
Well, he gets arrested a couple of times.
God damn it.
Yeah, he's not done with that shit yet.
So he's trying to, mind you, this is the year to clean up his reputation so he can maybe get into college, which isn't happening.
May 21st, 1994, here, about 1 a.m., Seattle police receive a call from Pier 57, which is a tourist spot on the waterfront here.
And the manager down there requested help controlling, basically, there was a party that had more visitors in the party than the restaurant could hold.
Okay.
And they called the cops to try to.
Yeah, basically.
Hey, I'm over fire code.
Can you help me clear people out of here?
So it was one of those things for crowd control here.
It was the multi Greek council from the University of Washington booked a party there.
And frat party.
Yeah, it was a frat party and whatever from 1030 to one or 10 o'clock to p.m. to 130 a.m.
So by one o'clock, though, it had overrun the place.
So the door counter stopped counting at 432 people.
And the guy estimated to the police was about 600 people there, which was way outside safety regulations.
So what happens is the police start moving
these fucking crowds out into the street.
They're getting hundreds of people at the same
time out of this restaurant. They're all shit
hammered. Of course. So you're pushing 200
shit hammered people who are
pissed off that they're getting kicked out of the party
into the street at the same time,
which is with the tourists, which is
a fucking horrible idea. So many
assholes are going to come out right now.
They should have pushed them into the water on the other side.
Swim for it.
You're fine.
Honestly, there's an island out there.
Boy, swim to the pier.
You'll be out of energy by then, and then you won't fuck with anybody.
And wet fucking idiots.
Yeah.
Dipshits.
So anyway, officers at this point, witness a an incident flare up on a
sidewalk here and they call what they what they deem a violent incident this is in just plain
view of four seattle police officers standing there cory who's about six two about 210 pounds
at this time full of muscle and you know an athlete uh they watch him punch a woman in the face holy
shit just straight hauled off and socked her right in the grill just jacked a woman in the middle of
the street in front of multiple police officers pop this woman in the face apparently she falls
to the ground right because she got dropped exactly potatoes and as she falls down that's
when the crowd gets pushed out so then she's like trampled by frat
boys at that point so police come over to try to get her up off her feet because she just got
punched in the face which isn't funny at all but for some reason it's just this whole scene is
crazy ridiculous pow flop oh shit here comes drunks get her up wait hold on a minute get her
before the crowd does.
And then also, can someone grab the guy who just punched this woman in the face while
we're doing this as well?
So, yeah, this is bad.
So while the while the cops tried to help her, they tried to grab him and he pushed
his way through the people because now there's a giant sea of people going the opposite direction.
He's good at pushing his way through people because it's kind of what he does.
He's a running back.
It's kind of, you go the opposite direction
of people trying to tackle you this way.
So that makes sense.
But the fucked up part was, this is what's insane.
Out of everybody that's pushing around,
they can't get to Dylan
because the crowd ends up being angry at the woman.
The crowd being pushed out of the bar is angry at the woman
who is semi-conscious trying to get to her feet
because she's obstructing the crowd coming out.
So they start yelling at her and throwing shit at her.
She's been punched in the face on the street,
and now there's a bunch of fucking asshole frat boys yelling and throwing
shit at her when she's trying to regain consciousness.
And this bitch attracted the attention of the police.
And yeah,
how could you?
Ridiculous.
Yeah,
that's basically,
it's fucking nuts.
Frat boys.
Fucking frat boys.
So the crowd gets so hostile that the police have to form a human fucking circle around
her to keep the people from doing to from physically attacking her unbelievable for being
there wow which makes i can't even it makes no goddamn sense so uh finally four officers get to
cory dylan and they try to arrest him.
He's resisting.
He's got a bunch of people around him also and there's a shitload of people in the streets.
So what ends up happening is
an officer tries to handcuff Dylan.
He's hit by one of Corey's friends who's right there
and it's a big crowd, so it's a melee.
So he's hit by one of his friends.
The cop still tries to handcuff Corey, but then he's hit again by another friend.
So Corey and the group end up basically fighting with the police and the crowd from the bar at the same time because they're pissed at Corey.
Because there's three different sides all mad at each other.
And they're all fucking fighting.
And it's insanity. This is a visual aspect of of twitter yeah this is twitter
in real life on the street and there's a woman who got punched in the face for no reason she's
bleeding and they're like you whore she's like what did i do i was just standing there i didn't
do anything i don't just was standing there and then there's like a fucking group of frat boys being it's insanity.
So N word being thrown around.
Yeah.
People fuck, man.
It's a mess.
So this is this is obviously a disaster.
The police at this point said that they this was their they they sensed that the scene was on the verge of being out of their control, which it was because they're vastly outnumbered.
And really, at that point, I don't know.
So they respond by spraying pepper spray at Corey and his group.
Right.
But not the other group.
Yeah.
Who was trying to attack a fucking woman.
Why not spray that?
Frat boys and everybody.
Fuck this.
Spray everybody.
What are you doing?
If it's not a woman bleeding or a
cop just spray them that's i mean that would be the thing at that point with the two groups of
that are going to fight each other right they're about to fight each fuck that knock them all down
yeah i don't know so anyway the the pepper spray subdues cory's friends but it only pissed cory off
right because he's he's just he's a tough motherfucker
obviously so anyway uh four officers tried to pin him down he got away uh four officer officers and
pepper spray yeah he gets out of that that's how strong he is bill o'chick's like sign him he's
like he's gonna win a super bowl for me someday he's gonna set the franchise record for rushing
yards in a season someday i see it sign him amazingly it ended up
being six police officers to restrain him and apply the handcuffs and get him in the back of
the car for uh reckless endangerment with the woman and uh resisting arrest there so uh i mean
it seems like he could have got charged with a lot more assault for punching a woman in the face
that should be yeah that's that's all of that was crazy but let's get back to the thing where he punched a woman in the face in the street
like all the other stuff you know how things can get out of things get out of hand and
things are said and an object is thrown and fucking you know whatever cops are oversensitive
about shit and everything but you can make an excuse for anything but not punching a woman
square in the face in the middle of the street
and you know there are there are qualifiers to that i'm sure if a woman had a gun on me
and she turned for a second i might drill her go ahead and drill her drill her right i think
you're justified at that probably probably justified but but if i'm six two and play
sports and she's a little woman and she called me a bitch yeah i might just go
sure all right whatever yeah walk away whatever yeah have fun by yourself whatever i'll leave
you here i'm your ride haha or whatever the fuck i don't know call of whatever an uber is in 1980s
call a yellow cab all right but don't punch her no No. So Coach Roberts here talks about him, describes him.
This is a silver haired, middle aged white man.
He describes him through this period.
He says, quote, He used to have a chip on his shoulder toward authority.
I would say probably.
Corey walked around with that chip when he was younger.
And did he like to fight?
Yeah.
He's a big, strong kid.
Somebody would start a fight and Corey would finish it.
And when people asked who did it, people would say Corey Dillon.
Because when you're talking about hoods, you're going to see Corey.
He's a massive man and walks with pride.
Look at what he did on the field in his first year with the Bengals.
Imagine him walking around the hood doing this.
Okay.
Okay?
Yeah, I don't...
I don't like the word hood.
I don't like it from him.
No.
Imagine him walking around the hood doing this.
Just beating people with sticks.
It's amazing.
I saw him and I was like, if I could get that aggression.
Just that raw...
I need the hood for my team.
I need more hood on my team.
I need more hood.
Get him in here.
He's dorky Vince McMahon.
Come on.
Get him in here.
Get that shirt off.
Let's go.
Come on. Look at the fascularity. He's going to be great McMahon. Come on. Get him in here. Get that shirt off. Let's go. Come on.
Look at the vascularity.
He's going to be great.
Right in the hood.
The hood describing white people is way worse.
When old white people, when older white people use the word hood like that, I feel like they wear a hood.
I feel like that's not a different.
So anyway, you know all people
shouldn't say the hood no it sounds like them imagine them walking around the hood doing this
just sounds imagine it at a rally oh my goodness geez geez louise let me tell you what the fuck
so i like the term geez louisa reminds me of my wife oh god that's her
name that's her mom's name even worse boy i'll tell you anyway anyway yeah back to the hood right
so uh well i also back to the hood for him too uh cory june 13th 1994 arrested for theft god jesus just please stop yeah please stop cory
stop doing things just go home and stay there i don't know what to tell you he's been arrested
like six times someone tell cory there's a like a like a massive pandemic going on like really it's
a bad one like we're fucking plague level right cory plague oh my god stay inside stay home he put this gas mask on and
don't leave stay there so uh yeah he's arrested for theft this is later dismissed if he does one
of those it's uh if he doesn't get any trouble in the next year it's dismissed one of those
deals so that's what happens there in june uh july 1994 he pleads guilty to assault and obstruction in the street melee with the woman
punching in the face here.
So obviously he's a hot property for college football or jail or jail.
July is literally like they're doing like workouts and fun college football teams.
He's pleading guilty to assaults and getting arrested for thefts.
So a team has to have him.
It's a junior college team. garden city community college in kansas uh here it's in garden city
kansas they are the garden city bronc busters is their name but he goes there as a as a freshman
and uh he impresses his coach his coach's name is jeff liker and he's probably saying holy shit a real athlete i am in
a community college in kansas this is amazing does jeff liker coach for ncaa now like i'm not sure
l-e-i-k-e-r that sounds so familiar check him out but cory's playing both ways even he's playing
running back and free safety so he's fucking he's a he's a monster he's on the field all day oh yeah
because he's their best player by far.
If he could kick, they'd throw him out there to do that.
Right.
Fuck it, please.
But off the field turned into a little bit of a handful.
Coach said that he was skipping classes and got into a shitload of fights on campus and around campus.
None of them were police involvement because they're like, please don't arrest him.
None of them were police involvement because they're like, please don't arrest him.
I'm sure campus security, if they have a campus, was told, whatever happens to him, just contain it, please.
Because he runs for 1,165 yards and 16 touchdowns for that team.
So they were probably like, look.
How many games did they play?
Ten?
Who knows? Probably ten games.
Community college, maybe ten.
Wow.
I don't know.
And he didn't even come in in the first game.
He came in like, just jumped on the team and started kicking ass.
So he doesn't make it through a whole season, though.
No?
Because by August of 1995, with all the fighting, before the next season starts, he's kicked
off the team by the coach because of all the fighting.
He's fighting with teammates. He's getting in trouble off the field he's just a being a dick however though the coach
liked cory yeah he liked him he had to for visuals they had to kick him off the team but he liked him
so he called another coach buddy of his a guy named this is the silver hair middle-aged white
man network now unbelievable it's now gone into this yeah this is what i mean when we say that like athletes don't have the same experience as other people and you can't lump them
in no because no one calls other people for young people who are just not who aren't who can't run
for 1100 yards in a season the boss of the dog catcher in kansas didn't call up to uh texas and
be like yeah listen i got this dennis raider guy being a real pain in the dick to my community.
That's what I mean.
Yeah.
But.
Could you hire him, please?
He's the best dog catcher you're ever going to.
He's amazing.
On the field, the guy is a fucking.
He's an animal.
I'm not going to lie to you.
He'll chase down a German Shepherd like you've never seen.
He will ejaculate all over it.
You have no idea.
He has to murder it first.
Right.
But once he murders it, he really can give you.
He really gives it hell. He can give you quite the load it's the volume is impressive that's what i'm getting at if that's
what you're looking for i don't know if that's what you're looking for in a dog catcher i don't
know what his water intake is but i'm going to tell you the viscosity of this is incredible he
eats a lot of pineapple i can tell just real sticky near it's wild so ungin aroma you can tell it's like a you know it's
like a skunk weed but with a like a sugary like a citrus quality stick that's what i'm telling you
good stuff you run out of elmer's glue in a pinch a little work so my kids use nothing but
his jizz that's's it. They use.
We've gummed to.
Gross.
I just looked at you like.
I gave you a look like.
Come on.
I can't believe I did that.
Come on, Jimmy.
We're filling the glue sticks is what I'm telling you.
Keep it together.
Jam those in the freezer.
In a pinch it works
put them out in the sun i think is how it works you want to harden it
harden yeah otherwise i was thinking if you if you freeze it as it melts down it's a little
better you know what i mean yeah i would say so that's true i figured the outer layer is
hardened but then tell you what you do one i'll do the other tomorrow we'll come back
glue sticks we'll let you
know on small town murder this week how that goes okay tell you what listen to small town murder
this week we'll let you know how the great jizz stick experiment panned out good what's best
freezing or cooking you never know it's hot out so i'm gonna put my well i'll put mine out in the
black top out in front of my house and you put yours in the freezer, and then we'll test it on next week's show. It's going to be amazing.
Holy shit.
So, Liker over here.
Jesus Christ.
He calls Greg Crowshaw, which is the head football coach at Dixie College in St. George, Utah.
Okay.
Crowshaw was like, shit, yeah, sure, good running back, could fucking use him.
So, Corey this time, though, really puts in the effort.
He plays at Dixie State College in St. George, Utah.
He runs this season for two, it's junior college, 279 attempts, 1,899 yards and 20 touchdowns.
Absolutely fucking crushes it.
That's insane.
So yeah, he is killing it. So he has chosen the junior college offensive back of the year
by College Sports Magazine.
So he's getting attention now.
Now the major schools, he went for a year in a JC without fucking up,
without getting arrested, passed his classes, whatever.
I mean, however they did it, and ran for a shitload of yards.
So now an athletic director can say, oh, look, they can do this without taking responsibility.
So Washington, University of Washington, they go and get him, the Huskies.
He goes to this school here, coach Jim Lambright.
This year, 1996, they're 9-3.
They lose the Holiday Bowl against Colorado, 33-21.
But in October of that year, he has the second-best rushing game in school history with 259 yards.
Corey is going to have a long, through his whole career, he's going to have these big, giant games that he has
where he breaks records all the time.
If he gets off on one, he's going.
If he finds a weak spot in a defense,'s he'll exploit the shit out of it so
yeah uh that year he plays in 11 games he has 1555 yards which is pretty goddamn good i'm sorry
1695 yards i say 15 1695 and 24 touchdowns as well which are both uh school records so single
season all-time school records so crushing it coming from junior college here.
In one quarter against San Jose State, he rushed for 222 yards and caught an 83-yard touchdown pass in a quarter.
In the first quarter.
Wow.
In the first quarter.
Both setting NCAA records for rushing yards and all-purpose yards, 305 in one quarter.
That's insane.
In one fucking...
It still stands today, right?
In a quarter.
It's got to.
Probably.
I think they won that game like 48-0 or some crazy shit.
It was one of those stomping San Jose State playing a decent team.
So after his junior season, though, he announces that he's leaving the school to enter the
draft.
And at the same time
oh by the way guess who was at the university of washington uh coach al roberts really was there
yeah he was their running backs coach about that weird right wonder how he got that job strange
yeah i wonder that's what i mean did one follow one or who followed who so uh at that point he'd
been uh he he wants to leave the team and he wants to be a uh he, and he had coached in Philly, Houston, Phoenix, and New York, I guess, before in the NFL as an assistant coach.
And he ends up accepting an offer from the Bengals to be their special teams coach, their Al Roberts, because he had coached under Bruce Coslett when Coslett coached the Jets.
Once he gets on staff he starts trying
to convince the bangles to use their second round pick on cory dylan right he says quote i didn't
think cory would be available in the second round because he's a big time running back when our pick
came up at 43 mike brown looked at me and i said take him he said what do you think i said take him
we all discussed uh we we discussed all the think? I said, take him. We all discussed, we discussed all the other problems.
I said, Mike, take him.
Mike, take him.
Mike. Keep your daughter away from him.
Seriously.
No, just keep him at arm's length of any women that you might have around you and no sticks
and it should be good.
So he said, and we took him.
I didn't think Mike was going to do what he did.
He just handed it over and said, Dylan Washington.
So that was that.
And so they said they asked him all sorts of shit and dylan would say that or uh roberts when they would ask
him about shit like uh you know they because he knew cory so they were like we hear he has a
troubled past he'd be like nah kid stuff nothing because they would say we heard he got busted
selling crack and he goes that's a lie he never never sold crack. And I was like, well, he did, actually. But he just he would say it was it was juvenile offense, juvenile offenses.
And Corey also told the Seattle Times that he, quote, did not never saw or did not sell drugs ever.
So, Corey, he's got to get an image here.
What the fuck, man?
Yeah.
So, 97.
Who are you bullshitting?
Who are you bullshitting, Corey?
Just say, yeah, it. Yeah. So 97. Who are you bullshitting, bro? Who are you bullshitting, Corey? Just say, yeah, it was crazy.
I sold drugs when I was 14 because I had a fucked up childhood.
And look at what I've done since then.
I've turned my life around.
I would have much more sympathy for that guy than the guy that lies about it.
But in the mid-90s, it was a big, you know, bust these athletes.
It was post-OJ.
And it was too soon.
Yeah, it was one of those things.
So it was a different time.
So anyway, this year, the 97 draft, we have Orlando Pace is the number one pick overall.
For the Rams.
Hall of Fame left tackle there.
Darryl Russell's second, who was a big-time talent.
He's died in a car accident.
Did he really?
Yeah, very young.
I think under 30, I want to say, Darryl Russell died.
Yeah.
Sean Springs, Peter Boulware.
Walter Jones is another tackle who ends up in the Hall of Fame.
Tony Gonzalez, the Hall of Fame.
Tight end is in this draft.
A lot of shit in this draft, too.
Jim Druckenmiller.
What?
Number 27 overall is a young man, very little known about him at this point,
by the Carolina Panthers named Ray Carruth.
No kidding.
Yeah, our number, episode number one.
Out of Colorado.
Out of Colorado there. Yeah, Ray Carruth was drafted that. Our number number episode number one out of Colorado out of Colorado there.
Yeah. Ray Carruth was drafted that year as a matter. If you don't know when Crystal Pepsi
was discontinued, what was in Al Capone's vault or which famous meteorologist is Lenny Kravitz's
second cousin, then you haven't spent enough time on Wikipedia. But that's OK. I am here for you.
I'm Darcy Carden, and I'm inviting you to listen to my new podcast,
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Perfect.
Finally, though, number 40.
That son of a bitch could be listening to this.
Oh, he could be.
How crazy is that?
Hi, you're not invited.
No, never.
We mean you when we lumped in all those other people.
We meant you, too.
You're a dick.
What you did was bad.
Right.
So a lot of people in this draft.
Jake Plummer, number 42 overall right before cory dylan at number 43 and sam madison right after that so
some longtime nfl people in the second round here cory number 43 second round he's picked by the
bangles like they said earlier and uh i think uh jason taylor went like in the third round that
year he was the steal of the draft third round Hall of Famer, I believe.
For the Dolphins?
That Jason Williams?
Yeah, that Jason Williams.
Tall, defensive end Jason Williams.
Great player.
So the Bengals here, here's Al Roberts talking about Corey once he's drafted.
He says, they said, quote, how would you describe Dylan's juvenile record?
His response is, quote, Corey is a follower.
As a kid, he was always with the guys, but
never did it himself. He would be there
and around it, but he wouldn't do it. All the
little distinctive things that Corey was supposed
to have done. I'm sure he was in the area.
Did he actually put his hands in it?
I'm going to say no. Was he around it?
Yes. Okay, Al.
He punched a woman in the face, man. And then he took a
comb out and just combed his silver hair straight back.
He goes, is it looking good?
Unbelievable.
Yeah.
He said, quote, and Jim's report was that there were some early childhood things, but all the other people hadn't had any hassles with him.
So Jim was more than willing to draft him.
His exact words were, he's the real deal physically, and we should take a chance on him.
The kid was an okay kid, and it's not taking that big of a chance because the kid hadn't gotten in any trouble lately.
I mean, he had a little ruffles on the edge, and he needed some smoothing out like all kids do,
but he hadn't gotten any of that drug-related stuff lately because that was bad pub at the time.
You know, drug stuff with athletes was how dare they take drugs. 90s you punch a woman and we can we can bury that drugs oh my god the worst he's
like the kids will want to do drugs i mean punch women let the kids punch the women but jesus drugs
you can't have that there's fluff pieces here galore here oh man his uh his agent uh here was
talking about or this was an article in the
seattle times that dylan got into fights and mischief as a juvenile that's what they said
made it sound kind of yeah but they had to write nice things too because as yeah that's your second
round pick was a good running back and the bangles fucking stink and they did stink and he they need
players and they need to talk up whoever that they draft
because otherwise what you got to give the fan base some fucking hope something yeah i would be
like i mean he's kind of a shithead one time he punched this woman right in the face in front of
these cops and then had a standoff with him and got pepper spray and it didn't matter and six guys
had to tackle him but we think he's worked through all that how do you know one Bengals fan hope? Not easily. So Roberts told the Cincinnati Post here, Silverman Roberts, he said, quote, he did not sell crack cocaine.
That is poor information.
According to the police report in the court papers, he did.
But who knows?
According to public record.
I mean, that can go either way.
he's according to public record i mean yeah i mean that can go either way so i mean uh with his rookie contract he does something very cool he buys a house for his mom with his first contract
jolene deserves it she deserves a house absolutely it's uh what she called her dream house in the
rainier valley just two blocks away from lake washington to get her out of the city nice place
here lake house. Yep.
She said it was so perfect she could have drawn the plans herself,
and that's what she would have drawn.
It's just perfect.
And she said that she gets to watch Corey on TV on the big screen television
that Corey gave her.
So that's what he's doing.
So that's a nice thing to do.
Now, 1990s, 70s on the Bengals, and they were fucking shit for a long time.
They were.
Boy, oh, he's on the Bengals, and they were fucking shit for a long time. They were. Boy, oh, boy.
This is the era where their quarterbacks are Jeff Blake and Boomer Esiason.
Boomer, and I believe this is post-Jets Boomer when he came back, if I'm not mistaken.
He was really bad.
No, did he leave?
I can't remember.
But either way, Boomer, by the way, I was looking through Audible the other day.
Boomer has a fucking true crime book out.
Not a true crime.
A crime fiction book about a football team.
I swear to God.
It's what we've all been.
We all want like a dark.
Clamoring.
I want a dark true crime.
I want a dark crime thriller, but I really want one that was written by a slightly above
average NFL quarterback who's been retired for a long time.
That's what I really want. I've been looking for one and finally now it's here bashed in the head repeatedly i can
barely spit out a coherent thought about football please tell me something that you don't know about
and doesn't have a milligram of pigment in his entire body anywhere or otherwise anything just fucking just transparent i don't know what happened guys
look at me so uh bad team holy shit uh bruce coslet's coach convinced that fucking guy
that we need a book that didn't have anything to do with quarterbacking well it's a it's a it's a
book about like the murder a murder on a football team so it's even worse so it's cheesier but i've
heard boomer talk listening to him speak and give like the narrative of a game.
I've never said, man, I'd love to hear him.
I'd love to know what he could do with like 300 pages.
Just fucking let him loose.
Man, I need to hear anything else that he has to say.
Come on, Boomer.
I don't want him to read me his grocery list.
No.
And it's on Audible.
So it's he's reading the book to you. I don't know if he's the...
I can't remember if he's the narrator.
If it's him, I might buy it just to laugh.
I almost bought it just to, like, fucking see how bad it was, but I'm like, I'm not
wasting $11 on this to see how bad it is or whatever the fuck it costs.
You bought $11 out of me?
It's got, like, a helmet on it it. It looks like a cowboy helmet almost.
Is it Boomer Esiason?
It's written by Boomer Esiason.
It says written by Boomer Esiason.
Written by NFL quarterback Boomer Esiason.
All things are real.
I am fucking, I am looking it up right here
because this is goddamn crazy.
I have Audible up right now.
Let's look up Discover discover that can't possibly
be his real name is it boomer that's not his it fucking better not be i'll be so mad if if that's
actually on a birth certificate and a driver's license the fuck do you spell esiason uh yes i a
s-o-n s-o-n yeah yeah that's right. It's called Toss. Get the fuck out of here.
It's not narrated by Boomer.
He's very busy.
It's called Toss.
It's got like a cowboy's helmet.
Wow.
It's all true crime-y looking.
How did he get away with that?
Because it's New York Stars, he calls it.
Yeah, like the old WFL team, which he even stole that.
New York Stars, the rookie quarterback, figures the world is his oyster.
Reality sets in after meeting his football, quote, family.
The all-too-benevolent owner, Papa Goldman.
His daughter, the Stars director of communications, Dominique,
who has a certain fondness for quarterbacks and a frustrated head coach.
A team full of malcontents and racial divisions
and a very shady director of player
personnel personnel but all of his concerns become secondary when an x stars quarterback is murdered
and brody he named himself brody he did come on boomer you know brody's not a good name
fucking asshole jesus christ. Come on, man.
And Brody finds himself hustling just to stay alive while confronting the scars of his own past.
Brody from the cornfields of the flyover states.
Fuck yeah.
Jesus.
He got drafted because he was really good at throwing passes to the scarecrow.
He was awesome at it.
He'd run drills out there for hours.
I can't believe how much I hate Boomer.
This isn't over, by the way.
With a little luck, smarts, and help from a beautiful, aspiring actress.
Come on, Boomer.
No.
No.
You know Boomer wrote love scenes.
Absolutely.
There's a scene where he says he slips her thing off the shelf.
It's Boomer Esiason writing a soft love. And his editor was like, Boomer, no. He's like, I got it. scenes absolutely there's a scene reasons he slips her thing off the show it's boomer asaiasin writing
a soft love and his editor was like boomer no he's like i gotta they need romance this is one time he
can't drop the ball someone seems intent on sabotaging the stars the new york stars and
perhaps the future of the entire football league is at stake as Holy shit. Jesus, Jimmy. Retired gridiron great Boomer Esiason has delivered a sharp, edgy, insiders look at the game and business of professional football.
I hope they roast him every day on NFL Sunday for this bullshit.
When did that come out?
Is it brand new?
It's fucking recent.
It's brand new.
No, 2010.
Wow.
This has been out for 10 years.
This fucking asshole 10 years.
This fucking asshole 10 years ago slid this under the radar.
That's the audio book, so the regular book is probably 11 years old.
Fucking idiot.
So this idiot this year was playing for the Bengals, watching them go seven and nine.
Jesus Christ.
Now, Corey, in one game, breaks Jim Brown's single-game rookie rushing record in a game with 246 yards and a victory against Tennessee.
So that's Jim Brown.
That's no joke there.
If you're breaking one of Jim Brown's records, you're doing something pretty good.
I'm on a team that's disappointed every year.
Every fucking year.
So this year, though, he has 1,129 yards rushing, which is pretty goddamn good, and 233 attempts.
Not bad.
4.8 a carry is pretty fucking good.
That's great.
That's damn fine.
He's on the all-rookie team.
He's a bad motherfucker.
Just to give you an idea of the overview of the league at this time, this was the year
the Broncos won the Super Bowl that year.
Brett Favre is the MVP.
Wow.
AP MVPs are Brett Favre and Barry Sanders.
How about that?
So think about that. Rookie of the year warwick dunn yeah oh wow yeah peter bulware the defensive rookie of the year
uh defensive player of the year dana stubblefield passing leader give you one guess oh you'll never
get it the passing leader leader in yards dimmer no with dimmer dimmerino no no not that year jeff george get
the fuck out of the raiders 3917 yards wow and they were like 3 and 13 yeah but he threw a lot
of there and it out he threw like 30 touchdown passes too and then uh barry sanders had over
2 000 yards receiving that year or rushing not receiving i was reading the receiving runner yeah
wow and he's a great running back amazing oh bar very so yeah good year for him in 1997 all is forgotten everything's great march 3rd 1998 oh no it's about
one o'clock in the morning oh no this isn't good uh police uh say that he made three quick uh three
turns in a quick succession without signaling once running over a curb and clocked
him going 35 and a 25 oh they're out looking for drunks at one in the morning here this is one uh
they said the they made observations and made a stop and quote based on their observations they
made an arrest they say that they got he got out of the car They smelled alcohol on his breath when he began talking. They said his eyes were bloodshot, speech slurred, the usual deal here.
He refused to take a field sobriety test and refused to sign a release for a blood alcohol test at the precinct once they took him in.
So try these bracelets on.
Yeah, that's an automatic suspended license and all that shit, too.
One of the officers smelled alcohol there, and they said that his eyes were bloodshot, so they got him out.
They said he was very, quote, very hostile and uncooperative.
He was yelling and would not comply with our requests for information.
Well, he doesn't have to be a nice guy, but he does have to comply or else he's got to.
But he's also behaving like a drunk.
Like a drunk would.
Yeah, unreasonable.
That's what drunks do uh he's booked into jail for investigation of dui and first degree negligent
driving and third degree driving with a suspended license oh no suspended license why don't anybody
ever get their license fixed man you bought your mom a house get your license fixed that's so much
cheaper fuck man he was released on $1,250 bond here.
Now, this was back in Seattle, and so this doesn't look good for him.
But he says that he said that he was pissed off.
He said that it wasn't his fault.
He said he wasn't drinking at all and that police did not give him sobriety tests on the scene like he wanted.
And they said he refused.
He also said that they searched his car without permission or a warrant
while they arrested him.
So at that point, his car is in custody.
They still have to get, it doesn't matter.
They searched him.
And he said, quote, I was harassed the whole nine yards,
which is a different statement from when he was a kid.
Who knows?
We don't know the fucking story there.
You were probably drunk and they were probably dicks. I'm going to go with a little from column a and a little from column b here like occam's razor
all right like you're he was probably shit-faced and at the same time they're probably dicks they
were probably mad that you were shit-faced and we're like you know we could probably be addicted
yeah but you don't have to be a dick to people if they're not a dick to you first. Like, you can fucking watch live PD and, like, you can tell the cops that have...
A chip?
The power trip?
Yeah, they have a chip and they have a...
They have...
It's almost a department-to-department thing when you watch...
Not to...
Obviously, Jesus, what's going on now?
Now we're going to...
But it's the fucking truth and it's when it's coming up.
So, I don't give a fuck.
If you take it how you take it, go fuck yourself.
I don't care because this is what it is.
Again, it should not be political. No's fucking disgusting it's obvious it's disgusting
you know what i don't even care if you take it that way go fuck yourself at this point because
the world is the world so it's fucking silly yeah honestly man we see this shit all the time and if
you watch live pd which is just because i know that's on camera so cops are gonna act different
but when they're in the middle of things,
they kind of do what they do.
Anyway,
if you watch this type of shit,
you can see it's a department to department thing.
Some departments seem to have an edict of you go out there and you,
you are,
you are military controlling fucking Fallujah right now.
You go out there,
you fucking patrol.
You got your tactical shit on overwhelming force, fucking dogs, machine, you know, fucking assault rifles, the whole
fucking thing.
Ten cars.
Always hand on your weapon.
Always.
Always.
Always be ready to tase.
Always be.
Before you even ask a question, get somebody completely whatever before you even say license
and registration.
Like that's some departments.
Have them frazzled. Yeah. And then there's some departments where their their goal seems to be
let's not take everybody to jail at every single opportunity let's see if we can maybe
fucking not take somebody to jail maybe help them not do this again if possible and if we can affect
this person's life this shit's on tv and maybe
we'll affect somebody else that's what i mean you'll see like a couple guys where they'll have
like i remember this one this guy in indiana you could see like the certain guys you should follow
around they have a certain style where they're trying to not be assholes right and not be
combative they're trying to be a fucking community service well like there's a that seems to be the
whole fucking point of what you're doing so anyway that you have a SWAT team yeah that's what they're for if you're a regular guy fucking
be regular guy you don't have to be SWAT guy if you want to be SWAT guy go try out from fucking
SWAT you want to you want to put the thing on and go and rush people then do that otherwise
doors open go do it otherwise i'll tell you what learn how to fucking talk to people because that
helps a lot learning to fucking talk to people because that helps a lot.
Learn how to fucking talk to people.
It really does.
You can see situations diffuse just by people fucking talking and you can see situations
escalate just by talking back to live PD.
We talked about that one situation that happened where they were fucking with one.
Cops are fucking with the one member of the family and they were talking to him and some
one of the kids in the family, some
teenager said, go, go, fuck you. So the cop
the kid tried to walk away
rather than letting it fucking
diffuse, the cop had to go over and slam
the kid on the ground, which brought mom
grandpa, uncle. So then
before you know it, there was six cop cars
slamming the whole family around
grandpas on the fucking lawn
ridiculous. It was fucking not necessary. For no slamming the whole family around. Grandpa's on the fucking lawn. Ridiculous.
It was fucking not necessary.
For no reason.
Not necessary.
All it had to be was,
hey, the cop could have said,
hey, Jesus, what do you got that for?
He kissed your mother with that mouth,
ha ha, and moved on.
Didn't have to slam the kid on the ground.
Deal with the dad.
Tell him that's how you're raising your kids.
And I get, yeah, and I get people say,
it's a hard job.
And you know what?
It is a hard job.
And there's a lot of fucking hard jobs.
There are.
You know what also sucks?
Coal mining.
But you're not allowed to turn around to the guy next to you when he pisses you off and fucking whack him with your shovel.
That's not allowed still.
You can't go grab his mom and pin her to the ground.
And it's arguably just as dangerous.
You know what I mean?
Obviously, nobody has it out for the coal miner and trying to snipe him off as he comes
in, but it doesn't fucking matter.
And we have a lot of cops that listen to the show.
We do.
It happens.
We have a ton.
My cousins in Colorado are cops.
Nobody in my family is a cop.
My cousin was shot two years ago.
Mind your own business.
That's our general.
That's none of your business.
Who do you want to get involved with?
Well, their dad who married into our family was a cop, and they followed in their dad's shoes. And that's beautiful general that's none of your business you want to get involved who married into our family was a cop and they followed in their dad's shoes and that's beautiful that's
fine good at what they do and they're they're there's so many of them that are good at what
they do and it's fucked up when you talk to the ones who uh who aren't assholes they're mad at
the ones who are assholes think about how mad you are they are so much matter the only difference is they don't have
to be part of that right that's the thing and again people will get fucking mad at this but
people say this shit all the time to everybody you don't like it quit you don't like it quit
they say that to people who've worked their whole lives to get to something and we don't like it
quit well i don't know it's not like a doctor where you go you don't like it quit well i don't
know i went to medical school and then residency and I'm 300 grand in debt from
all this shit.
15 years to get 300 grand in debt just to pay back my student loans.
I have to be a doctor.
Basically,
you're not in that,
that deep as a cop.
So if you don't like it and you don't like people and you're not good at
dealing with people,
go do something else.
Please quit.
Please quit.
Yeah.
And I'm sure all the rest of the guys on the force would fucking say the
same thing. And if they could turn you rest of the guys on the force would fucking say the same thing.
And if they could turn you in and if they could say this shit without you fucking leaving them somewhere to be fucking ravaged when not backing them up, they would fucking say it.
But because of some of your shitty fucking prison gang mentality, it doesn't get fucking done.
And this sucks.
And you know what?
We're going to get a lot of people pissed off at us for saying this shit this is not why we we've never intended for this shit we never go here and we
don't but this is fucking life and if it's if you consider that political that the fucking community
police that you pay to protect your fucking neighborhood shouldn't treat you like you're
already in prison all the time then I don't know
fuck you then if you think that that's not
what is fucking wrong with you are you high
are you fucking
stoned and if you are that's amazing
weed but you should probably smoke a different
strain because it's fucking your logic up
let's just switch to a
sativa saying something like
if you just cooperate and give
your ID I didn't do anything
yeah that's the problem yeah if i if i didn't i shouldn't have to yeah that's the thing there's
a lot of america there's a lot of shit man and yeah and fuck man jesus christ like a monster
so that's that i don't know how the fuck we even got on that was cory dylan said he got harassed
by the police no he probably did but he probably did and he probably also deserved it and that's that. I don't know how the fuck we even got on. That was Corey Dillon said he got harassed by the police.
No,
he probably did,
but he probably did.
And he probably also deserved it.
And that's the other thing too.
I want to say guy like Corey Dillon right now,
1998 is not getting the same treatment that you or I are getting,
or that someone on the streets getting,
or your,
your average 23 year old black dude out there on the street at one o'clock in
the morning.
Corey,
if you,
and this is how cops fucking operate.
If a cop pulls over a fancy fucking car,
say a $100,000 car at 1 o'clock in the fucking morning,
and they roll down that fucking window,
and it's a young, under-25 black guy in the car,
they're going to run those fucking plates,
run that registration.
Right away, they're going to go,
oh, because if he's got any kind of jewelry or anything,
they're going to go, oh, I bet he's a fucking drug dealer.
I bet this is in his aunt's name or some girlfriend that's their
first fucking thought whether they think it or not they don't think oh big muscular f and it's not
it's part racial and it's part big muscular guy doesn't look like he's been fucking you know
running the stock market you know what i'm saying like he looks like he's somebody like an athlete
so then they see that oh he owns the car it's his car they must be important that guy must have a platform he must have notoriety he must have shit so i can't fuck
with him quite as much as i would somebody else i'll just arrest him for what i have on him and
we'll move forward tomorrow that's it and we'll not and we'll and we'll look like oh we showed
great restraint and he's a monster and that's how they whereas if this was somebody who had no
platform who couldn't release
a statement through his agent
the next day
who knows what would've
fucking happened
or if it's Suge Knight
and the car's in his mom's name
that could go bad too
yeah that's the other thing
and a lot of people
are fucking assholes
when cops are trying
to be nice
because I see that
all the time
you have to put that in there
because like on Live PD
you'll see that all the time
where the cop is trying
their best so hard to not and the people just want to fucking escalate it for
whatever reason their personal thing at that time they need to have this confrontation and they
they fucking force it that happens too a lot my old apartment i remember sitting out on the balcony
and there was this drunk asshole kid out there and this fucking cop came by there was two cops
and one of them his name what the fuck was his name i don't even remember his name but he kept repeatedly saying
this kid's name the kid went to get away from him he hopped in his own car in the driver's seat
which is an automatic he had his keys automatic diy right so the cop goes and he's saying over
and over listen to me yeah get out of the car go inside yeah i'm not going to arrest you right he goes
i have about four things to arrest you for right now and i'm not going to arrest you he goes i'm
gonna let you go inside and sleep this off please he goes your door is 20 feet away from here or my
car is right there it's a way longer trip to jail or you can be in bed in 20 minutes please stop
and the guy was going fuck you fuck you you fucking pig all drunk and the cop would be like because he
knew the guy was so drunk and he goes listen yeah listen and he kept saying his name over and over
i can't remember what it was but just over and over jimmy jimmy jimmy and he was saying jimmy
jimmy changing inflection jimmy and he was just this drunk fucking mexican dude and he just eventually the guy fucking went
in his house but i mean it got cops standing out there for 20 minutes and uh you know a lot of cops
would have pulled that guy out and beat the shit out of him in the road because i was to the point
where i was going i'm gonna come down and beat the shit out of this guy if you don't fucking pull
him out of the car because i'm annoyed that's either patience and restraint or an officer that
just does not want to ever have interaction with this guy again yeah i would i don't even want to see your face
i feel like he's like at the end of his shift and he's like i'm not doing paperwork for you
i just want to go home i'm not doing it for you i'm not going to sit there with you for fucking
two hours waiting for the i'm not doing it well they take pictures of you not doing it fingerprint
no nope go the fuck to bed go inside dummy so i like the cops that are clearly trying to be
funny on that show i do say i enjoy that that's the best part of the whole guy if all the cops
were like that people would have a way different view of oh we would love them everybody would
like them if they were like hey look but not everybody is open to humor yeah and that's
what's funny too is some when that's they get more humor sometimes which is good and some of them deal with it so much that it loses it's funny you know what i mean exactly
yeah hearing the same joke over and over again you can't keep laughing so her elbow eventually
fucking cuff him up yeah i don't know that's what i'd get him that's what i'd end up if i was a cop
that's that's what i would end up getting in trouble for is beating people for telling bad
jokes to me i don't know how a woman cop doesn't just smack people over and over with her nightstick for you going to cuff me up, girl.
Yeah, some shit like that.
I like it rough or some dirty shit.
I would just have a trail of broken-headed, like, 65-year-old men behind me who told me, like, grandpa jokes.
Hey, did you see the crack right over there?
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Why do you only beat up 60- old men in like chrysler
sebrings what is going on why do you do that they all got the same joke same fucking joke man i can't
take it anymore it's like they tweeted it to each other so june 3rd 1998 cory dylan is in court he's
pleading guilty to negligent driving yeah and is sentenced to you, may fuck off 90 days in jail with 89 dismissed.
So one day in jail he gets there.
And he's also placed on probation for two years in order to attend a drunk driving victim's panel.
Yeah.
So there's that.
That's so sweet of them.
That's nice.
Not a bad, not a sweetheart deal there.
1998 Bengals.
They're three and 13.
Jesus Christ.
They suck.
I do too. Corey Christ, they suck.
Corey had 1,130 yards.
He had 1,129 the year before, so pretty goddamn consistent there.
4.3 yards a carry, not bad.
99 Bengals, 4-12.
They suck again.
He's got 1,200 yards rushing this year, so 4.6 a carry.
Corey is one of, I believe, I think it's 11 running backs in history to have 1,000 yards each of their first three seasons.
No shit.
Yeah, he's in company.
He's really a goddamn good fucking running back.
That's the thing.
He's nasty, man.
I mean, there's no doubt about that.
In 99, he makes the Pro Bowl as well.
No kidding.
So now the league recognizes him a little bit, too.
It was tough to get in before that because you had your Barry Sanders.
You had some ingrained running backs there.
So, although it's different AFC, NFC, but still.
Yeah, Terrell Davis.
You had some ingrained guys.
But 2000, his contract is up before the season.
So they sign him to a one-year deal worth $3 million for this year.
He receives at least a $700,000 signing bonus and will get another $300,000 at midseason if he's still on the roster, which he obviously will be.
He also, at this point, gets married.
Fuck it.
Time to get married, everybody.
Let's do it.
He marries a woman named Desiree Antine and uh he will be with her for a
little while here next 10 years or so and they'll have three children oh boy he's gonna have three
children two girls and a boy uh august 29th 2000 about 1 30 p.m uh this is outside of his home
here at the uh 1300 block of Southwest 353rd Street.
Oh, my.
Apparently, they're in an argument, him and his wife, new wife.
They get in an argument.
They're driving in the car.
She's driving.
And apparently, he punches her in the mouth while they're driving.
Sounds like him.
Sounds about right.
Yeah, this was on the way to their house.
Apparently, she does that. This is right in front of the house she's bleeding from the mouth
yeah they're in the doctor hard enough to make her bleed while she's driving
unbelievable i'm driving what are you fucking doing i don't care if you're a man a woman or
what don't punch the driver ever jesus what if you knocked her unconscious oh cough into a
fucking tree and you're both dead so she got out of the car after that and walked about a block to an address to a neighbor's house where she called the police.
And then, yeah, they ended up pulling up.
And there's both of them sitting outside the car, her with her mouth bleeding.
Post-fight.
Not good.
Not good here at all.
So he's arrested on investigation of fourth degree assault he posts a
thousand dollars bail and is released that evening um so he could face as much as a year in prison at
that point he misses a practice for the bangles and did not tell his team about the arrest right
away yeah because they were off on saturday and sunday and he told the team he'd be returning
said just said he'd be returning late he didn't say why i had some shit to do yeah bangles jm mike brown said he had called and his agent had called
but the information they relayed was not consistent with what i'm hearing he didn't say he punched his
wife in the mouth so he's gonna be late weird right so uh he said i just heard the report about
the arrest minutes ago i have nothing to say concerning it until i know more about it so who the fuck knows i don't know they're saying he hit his wife that's not
good so obviously things could be going better yeah for young cory and that's the as a boss that
that is the worst fucking thing to do is to yeah not you gotta fucking just tell them right away
especially if they're going to be hit with public right scrutiny about it surprised by that kind of
report is brutal so
uh your star running back what do you think about him bloodying his wife's mouth in the car huh he
did what i didn't know what was that even if you want to defend him you can't because you don't
well that sounds awful i mean that sounds terrible i don't think we can not he shouldn't do that i
was just focused on the prices of our hot dogs at the moment. That's against team policy.
I'd like to say right now.
I'm not even going to look in the rule book, but I'm pretty sure that is.
If he had done that on the field, I believe it's a 15 yarder right there.
So we're going to go ahead and say it's not OK off the field.
Probably ejection.
That seems something seems excessive.
So he's just he's fucking confused with his life.
He feels like he feels like, damn it. I've come a long way, and this is ridiculous, and everybody's coming
after me, and it's bullshit.
And he's very upset about everything.
He's upset.
He's walking around.
He's not happy.
He's not happy at all.
He gets this pleasant smell as he's walking.
And he's walking by, and it looks over.
It's a garden.
It's very pleasant.
He goes, what is that?
I don't even know what that is.
And he asked the man tending, what is this garden?
And the man looks up and he says, arugula, of course.
And it's Adam Arugula Jones, arugula connoisseur himself.
And he says, how is it you've come to arrive here?
I'm I'm sorry, but I asked you that because you sir you're your behavior's
exemplary i'm just going to say that this is ridiculous uh the man in the street with the
stick clearly i mean i look at that and that's obviously this man there are bees just terrible
bees in that neighborhood they're awful and this man was being swarmed and you're saying help him
help him and you're whacking insects they're flying off and the police arearmed and you're saying, help him, help him. And you're whacking insects. They're flying off.
And the police are saying like you're doing like you're some kind of monster.
Who would do that in the streets?
In the streets, mind you, never.
Oh, I know more than that about you, Corey.
Geez, crack cocaine?
No, not at all.
Not at all.
You gave him a gift card to Starbucks, I heard.
But I mean, geez, I mean, who doesn't get that?
And bee repellent.
Bee repellent.
So this is for you, sir. I mean, as far as doesn't get that? And bee repellent. Bee repellent. So this is for you, sir.
I mean, as far as punching these women.
Now, let's be honest.
Right.
Let's be realistic here.
You weren't vandalizing the car.
No.
Obviously, this vehicle, I feel as if she needed her window squeegeed.
And just because the squeegee's a little dirty, that is not your fault, sir.
I mean, you clearly were trying to help the young lady.
The floor was covered in bees, and he was kicking them off.
And as far as your wife goes, she was not positive of the direction.
So you said, honey, left.
And as you pointed, you just accidentally got her in the mouth a little bit because you were excited.
You were very excited.
So you said, honey, to the left.
And then, oh, my goodness.
And I know how these things happen.
There was bees in her mouth. There's bees everywhere. That's the left. And then, oh, my goodness. And I know how these things happen. There was bees in her mouth.
Blowing things.
There's bees everywhere.
That's the thing.
They don't understand the bees in this neighborhood.
Poof.
In a cloud of arugula and confusion, he's gone.
And Corey is super confused.
What the fuck?
Very confused.
In the future, Pac-Man Jones will play for the Bengals.
Hey, we're going to meet up someday.
So in 2000, the Bengals are 4-12.
They fucking suck.
Boy, were they bad for so long.
Jesus Christ, man.
Bruce Koslitz finally fired.
He's been their coach the whole time.
The fucking guy won 12 games in four years.
He finally gets fired after an 0-3 start and they hire dick laboe doesn't
do much better so october 22nd 2000 though i remember seeing this game versus denver he breaks
walter payton's single season rushing uh game record with 278 yards and he was fucking running
all over people that day that was in the dark times for the Broncos. That was... Elway retired and it was over.
Yeah, I think it was...
2000, not good.
Humphreys, Bobby Humphreys?
Oh, Jesus.
That was probably
Bobby Brister at that point.
Bobby Brister, that's who it was.
Yeah, that's bad stuff.
Not good.
And then Brian Greasy
after that.
I think it was
the two of them.
Yeah, Brister and Greasy.
Oh, Jesus.
That's a bad combination.
Oh, fucking shoot.
Can you bring
Neil O'Donnell in too
for a minute?
I would not be surprised.
At the end of his career
there for a year or so.
I feel like he was on... I think he was Elway's backup was he no no he was on pittsburgh
yeah it was bobby yeah one of these pittsburgh oh boy oh boy jesus what a sad fuck i like to
forget about those days you know they're like that time yeah not going well not going well
it's ugly it's ugly shit so the yard he has 435 yard 1435 yards this
year and makes the pro bowl so crushing it cory's having a goddamn four straight years of a thousand
yards and his contract is up oh but he doesn't want to stay with cincinnati because he says the
fucking team is losers right he doesn't want to be there he wants to win during negotiations for
his contract he declared he said in the press that he would, quote, rather flip burgers than keep playing for Cincinnati.
That is a fucking statement.
That's some shit.
But in the offseason, they signed him to a mighty burger flipping deal, a five-year, $26.1 million deal to keep him a Bengal.
So he's like, well, you know what?
That's a lot of burgers.
They taught me this grill work that I'm very happy that i learned so it's good enough
they bought me a new spatula and i will stick around i'm gonna stick around so and you get
some fluff with this this contract comes with a side of fluff that's nice uh yeah the uh the
dylan hired a pr team there is agent they hired a whole team and they're working with him to polish
his image he's got they have an article where it's him and his wife and their daughter playing in the
background and uh yeah he's speaking on the phone saying everything's fine and peaceful and good
he says uh quote i'm just growing learning a lot from trial and error i'll be 27 this month i'm
getting old i ain't got time for the nonsense no more it's just a part of growing up and learning
the do's and don'ts of being more peaceful with myself and the people around me okay okay well
some people grow out of shit like that yeah that's what it works uh just punched her six months ago
that's what i mean it's like it's kind of hard i'm growing you know learning not to punch my wife
while she drives do's and don'ts this is is very recent. Probably should have known that before 27, I would say.
I learned that a long time ago.
Bengals president Mike Brown says that Corey, quote, really has worked at getting his life in order.
He wants to do the right thing. He wants to be a successful player.
He wants to be good off the field.
He's been good with his family, regardless of what you may hear about things or his wife's mouth may feel about things while it bleeds.
So, yeah, she said that she was uh jesus christ she's driving they go over that whole thing dylan responded by the
way his defense for hitting his wife was that he was defending himself by covering his face with
his hands and somehow punched her in the mouth during that because she was beating him while
she was driving apparently which is it's a bad woman tough boy yeah she must be tough she is she's tough man oh boy yeah uh she said
well let's do it in their own words here find out how cory feels about this how he he feels about
the whole situation i feel like we need to know let's do in their own words quote i just really
wish it never happened but things happen things were done and stuff happened. Anytime you're
involved in a situation like that, someone is
going to take the heat and I took the heat. At the
end of the year, it will be off
the record and a closed case.
I thought everything was unfair, but life is
unfair.
There's a lot of repeat statements
there. Yeah,
because it's all bullshit. He goes, you know,
someone's got gotta take the heat
things were done and stuff happened they're moving on and bygones are going to be bygones
and uh what's good for the goose is good for the hand gander we're not asking you why the offense
didn't didn't uh produce today and i'm asking why you punched a woman in the fucking mouth
one of the hands better than two in the bush so i'm just saying he's gonna have fucking cliches coming out of his ass reading
the fucking almanac yeah cliche almanac here it is everyone so he then says quote who knows what
i was doing when i was 13 i really didn't care i was just growing up being a teenager like everybody
else i never had any problems at the university of washington i just think it's sad for someone
to be so petty to go back to when someone was 15 years old
and judge them instead of judging me as a 21-year-old man.
I could never understand that.
He said later on, he also says that he hasn't had a drink in three years.
What?
Didn't he just give?
That math doesn't work out.
Okay.
And, quote, all the time, the way people had panned out,
I could have been in jail or somewhere, not even doing the things I love to do.
Very true.
He says that as a kid, he got to watch Walter Payton there.
And he said, quote, I always got a chance to see Walter in action.
Nice runner.
I know why they called him sweetness.
He was light on his toes and he could do it all.
He said, being a running back, you'd be a fool if you never watched Walter Payton and appreciated what Walter Payton did for the game.
Very fucking true.
Walter's the man.
He's the shit.
He just, I mean, as a comic, you can't just watch George Carlin and think, you know, what a terrible guy because he's just clearly the best.
You're picking the best.
Yeah, you're picking Walter Payton.
It's hard to say anything bad about the guy.
Watch him.
His game is perfect.
He blocks amazingly.
Fucking like, he's so perfect. he catches the ball wonderfully great runner graceful smooth right also plow people over stiff arm drops the shoulder never missed a fucking game due to injuries the
toughest son of a bitch ever he picked the best guy and you're like he picked probably the best
football player in the history of the game and it was difficult for him to say nice things about him.
Yeah, I mean, he's a nice runner.
I see what they mean about him.
Fucking asshole.
No, he's probably maybe the greatest person to ever touch a football.
Definitely top three.
So, respect.
Unbelievable.
So, 2001, they're 6-10 the Bengals.
He has 1,315 yards.
That's five straight seasons of fucking 1,000 yards.
Not bad.
And they're getting better.
Sort of.
They still suck.
A couple more games.
A couple more games.
He makes the Pro Bowl again.
And he publicly calls out the owner of the Bengals, telling that the press, quote,
We will never win with the Brown family in Cincinnati.
They own the team, which is awesome.
That's I want the fuck out in Cincinnati. They own the team, which is awesome. That's I want
the fuck out of here. Trade me.
I thought it would be
fine and good enough to be rich, but I've decided
it's not. This sucks. That's Fitzgerald
calling the Bidwells shit back.
That's what it was, which they deserve
too. That's someone who went outside
and went, you know, Cincinnati, I smell
sulfur and zoo. That's not good enough.
I need to win if I'm going to stay here.
I smell the sulfur and zoo or sulfur or zoo.
Either one.
I like when they come together downtown to make it real.
My hotel was like the culmination point last time we were there.
Neither are pleasant.
They were waltzing in the street.
So 2002, he establishes the Corey Dylan foundation to provide inner city youth with opportunities
and resources to go the distance and achieve their goals so that's good anyway looking for
public image 2002 though uh after he complained about the bengal sucking they go 2 and 14 oh
no it's real bad and they don't even fire dick lebeau during the season they're like he's good
that man kept a job he's good well think about it they they don't even fire Dick LeBeau during the season. They're like, he's good. That man kept a job. Well, think about it.
They don't like to fire people because then you have to hire someone.
You have to pay them.
Because if you fire a coach, you have to pay them for the rest of their deal.
So the Browns are cheap as fuck.
The Browns that own the team.
Not the Cleveland Browns.
But they're cheap as fuck and they don't want to pay a coach they fire.
So they'll keep a guy until his contract runs out.
Marvin Lewis was a good coach at one point but
marvin lewis has been there for fucking almost 20 years now or it's been there like over 15 years
16 years or some shit it's not working out there he doesn't want a goddamn thing now it's not his
fault the bangles are the bangles but they've had some good playoff runs and they still didn't win
they've had some impressive wins too when during the regular season that you think holy shit they
figured it out.
And then the next week, they are garbage.
Nobody can coach anywhere for 15 years unless they win a Super Bowl.
If you win a Super Bowl, then you're golden and you have a big buffer around you. But until then, what are you doing?
Remember Schottenheimer got fired for going 14-2 with the Chargers.
14-2.
And then he lost a playoff game.
Get him the fuck out of here.
It's like, wow, he won 14 games.
That guy's good at this.
Holy shit.
So 2002, though, Corey runs for 1,311 yards.
So consistent.
He's so fucking consistent.
So that's six years of 1,000 yards rushing.
2003, the Bengals are 8-8.
Holy shit, they're 500.
How about this?
Wow, under coach marvin
lewis when he came in so he brought them to be after that they were going 12 and four and making
the playoffs right not that year no but after that they started being better so this year cory though
only rushes for 541 yards as they start platooning him because he's at this point considered old
because he's 29 right even though he's rushing for the same amount he was before because he's at this point considered old because he's 29 right even though he's rushing
for the same amount he was before yeah he's considered old so they want to draft a guy to
replace him already right and i believe it was rudy johnson they drafted who spent time with
him that year rudy johnson was good but different kind of back yeah so he went to the jets right i
don't remember where he ended up so april i don. Damn it. He was so good. He was good, Rudy. So April 20, 2004, the Bengals trade Corey Dillon to the Patriots for a second-round pick.
Okay.
That's it.
That's it?
Second-round pick.
They just wanted to get rid of him.
He was a second-round pick, so they got back what they got in.
They got back what they put in.
2004 here, he said that his decision to want to be traded because he was asking for a trade
was because of his frustrations with the team and the losing and all this sort of shit.
And he said that he met with Marvin Lewis, who was a new coach.
New coaches want to bring in their guys.
They don't want to have anybody from the old losing.
They want new running back, new everything.
So he wanted to get rid of Corey.
And he said that they couldn't see eye to eye, him and Marvin Lewis.
And he says, quote, he shrugged his't see eye to eye, him and Marvin Lewis.
And he says, quote, he shrugged his shoulders on me like there's nothing he could do.
At that very moment, I said, I'm out of here.
I'm done.
So, yeah, Dylan had visits with the Raiders also.
But after meeting with the – well, they saw his juvenile record.
They said, we've got to have him.
We've got to have him.
Tell me, what's your body count?
How many women have you punched? Never mind. Not good enough. Not enough, sir. We got to have him. Tell me, what's your body count? How many women have you punched?
Never mind.
Not good enough.
Not enough, sir.
There's more out there.
He said, we'll find him. Come back when you reach the big leagues, sir.
Yeah, you're a minor league domestic abuser.
This is weak.
He said that after he met Belichick, he felt he could be the most successful in New England.
He said, quote, the Patriots weren't even on my radar at the time.
I went there and had a sit down with Bill
and player personnel guy here,
and it was pretty simple.
He heard about some stuff that was going on in Cincinnati,
and I told him all that stemmed from not winning games.
My whole desire and passion was winning football games,
so all that negativity and stuff down there
was from not winning.
He said he understood and asked me,
do you think you could play for us?
I said, absolutely.
And that was the end of that.
A few days later, I signed a contract and I was a Patriot.
He goes in there.
I was fucking had an attitude.
I was only a malcontent because they suck.
And they don't.
Have you played them ever?
They fucking suck.
There's a reason you have like a 48 and 2 career record against them because they suck dick.
They're awful.
So he's called a reclamation project which makes no sense because he's never had a
year other than the year he didn't play much he's never had a year that doesn't have a thousand
yards but he's considered a guy who was a big running back and now had an off year and some
arrests so he's garbage really yeah which is crazy so the bet they were the patriots got a
steal here yeah they got for nothing a steal the second round draft pick and he says quote uh uh
it's just kind of curious every time the patriots do something or bring a guy in my name comes up
like i was a bad guy because whenever he brings somebody up they're like well they brought in
cory dylan and that worked he said this is later on yeah he said i'm trying to set that straight
first of all
if you go back in time look who i played for at the time are you kidding me people want to say
that i was a bad guy in that situation no that's not the case about the bengals cory forget going
back in time go forward in time they had a murderer on the fucking roster no problem with that
so the patriots this year go 14 and 2 yeah way different experience for old cory here
uh yeah they win the divisional round they beat the shit out of the cults they beat the steelers
41 27 in the championship game and then they beat the eagles 27 24 21 in the super bowl
cory has 1635 yards rushing which is a patriots franchise record, season record. So, yeah, he comes in 4.7 a carry.
He's one of the best backs in the league that year.
They fucking stole him.
That's amazing.
Then after that, Maroney, they'll draft Maroney and kind of do that.
He makes the Pro Bowl that year again.
So can't ask for anything more.
Super Bowl champ.
This is like Grace B.
Yeah.
Here right now.
2005, the Patriots go 10 and 6 uh that was
the year i believe when brady got his knee fucking popped in the first game of the year really and
they had uh matt castle backing him up i want to say the whole time castle that's right came in for
the rest of the year and they 10 and 6 they make the playoffs and uh they end up losing to the broncos right if you remember that year in 2005
didn't fucking matter no uh cory only has 209 rushes that year for 733 yards so uh not he's
he's platooned a little more than he'd like to be and uh but he's happy in general sure his mom
says quote you about the whole thing about him being mad and since he and
happy now she says quote you'd be mad too losing all the time and playing your heart out while all
the other players were saying they don't want to block for you okay because he was talking shit
about them yeah uh quote in new england he knows he's got everybody's back and they have the his
so that's good anyway else because bill chuck will fucking cut you he says now he feels a whole lot better like being released from jail jesus the cincinnati bengals one step up from jail christ you were
making 30 million dollars over five years and that's jail that's jail that's interesting see
that's why i say athletes have a different experience than other people because nobody
else would say that ever to I got 30 million bucks.
How crazy is that?
I'll tell you how crazy it was.
It was fucking jail.
It was jail, man.
Fuck you, Corey.
Jesus.
Fuck you, Corey.
I will lose for five years in the NFL for $30 million.
I don't give a shit.
And I'll fucking split duties with somebody.
You could never play me.
No.
You could never play me. I'll sit on the bench. I'll be backup punter. I don't give a shit. And I'll fucking split duties with somebody. You could never play me. No. You could never play me.
I'll sit on the bench.
I'll be backup punter.
I don't care.
And you'll still be a vacation every day.
A big smile every day.
Go team!
Camera pans on me.
I just give a big thumbs up.
Sit there all supportive.
I'd be the most supportive guy.
Two and 14 and I'll hold up a number one finger every Sunday.
Eating a hot dog with one hand, foam finger with the other.
Yay.
Every fucking Sunday.
We're the best.
We're so good.
So, 2006.
Buy tickets to our slaughter next week.
It's going to be great.
2006, Corey here is the Patriots are 12
and 4 and they end
up losing in the conference championship
to the Colts 38 34.
So that was the year. I believe the Colts
beat the Bears. I want to say in the Super Bowl.
Yes. Okay. So yeah, they beat
the Chargers and Jets leading up to that.
And so, you know, still
though good team. He's not doesn't he's not on a shit
team again this year. He's platooning 199 team. Again, this year he's platooning, 199 carries, 812 yards.
So he's platooning again, and that's going to be the end of his career right there.
Career over.
Over the course of his career, 2,618 rushes for 11,241 yards, 4.3 yards per carry.
Per carry average.
For his whole career.
Wow.
Not bad.
82 touchdowns. years fucking good yes
uh 10 years total that is impressive as fuck oh it's a great career it's great his average season
is about 1100 yards 4.3 yards to carry and you know some touchdowns it's goddamn good maybe two
more years that's probably hall of fame worthy yes real dependable yeah if he played for a few
more years he would he could have been like
Jerome Bettis and hung on,
stacked his numbers at the end. Storied in New
England or some shit. But New England
doesn't do that. They wanted to shuffle him out.
October 1st, 2007,
the Bucs want to sign him.
Tampa Bay, Cadillac Williams is hurt.
He's a loss for the season with a knee
injury, and so
the agent for Corey D dillman dylan confirms
that the bucks contacted them before the game was even over cadillac hurt his knee and by the fourth
quarter they were on the phone with cory dylan can you be here tomorrow is that possible we looked at
the rest of our roster and boy does it suck it stinks we have no runners so the agent said that
he texted cory to see if he was interested and got back. No, that was it.
Not even interested.
Not even a thought.
Nope.
Done.
It's probably like my legs feel good.
Fuck that.
I haven't gotten hit in the knees by a helmet in a long time.
So I'm going to say no.
And they play in the Saints division and the Saints at that time are killing people.
Yeah, exactly.
No shit.
For legalities.
Yeah.
No, you're right.
So, yeah, he said he was finished playing.
for legalities yeah no you're right so uh yeah he said he was finished playing he didn't formally file retirement papers because he was getting accrued severance pay at that point whatever
technical shit uh his agent said quote cory's not hurting for money he's taking care of his money
even if dylan did file papers with the league to obtain his pay uh he would not be precluded
from returning to the field so he could play if he wanted to.
On his reputation and his career, he says, quote, it comes down to we play this game,
this football game to actually win football games.
That's what you play for.
I don't know what was on everybody else's agenda.
Me personally, I was never a me guy worried about somebody else's money, worried about
getting paid.
My main objection was to win football games, and my ultimate goal was to win a championship.
That's what I was in the game for.
That was my passion.
And if you check, go ask former teammates in Cincinnati.
I wasn't a bad guy in the locker room.
My whole thing was, hey, listen, I'm tired of losing.
And to sum up that and put it in a corporate America hypothetical situation,
if you had a job where you feel you're going nowhere
and you have an opportunity to better yourself and better your career in a different situation you're not going to take
that opportunity but i do it and i'm a cancer i'm a bad guy i don't know how people think that i
don't get it i totally agree with that that's a good point if you're on a team and you want to
be on a different team i don't know why that's different from someone working for a law firm
and wants to work for another law firm guess what you should be able to go work for that
fucking law go work for no one should be mad at you for it a law
firm that makes money and wins yeah our law firm sucks we take shit cases and then we don't fucking
do them well what the fuck we take shit cases and then we fucking lose i don't want to do that
anymore this sucks man what because we still get paid who gives a shit who cares i don't care this
is this is not this is boring i want to succeed at some point i want to succeed with something more than just having a car that's nice right
so 2008 he is inducted into the dixie state college hall of fame really there for one year
it's the best player they've probably ever had so that's why uh spring of 2010 rumors start to
happen about him coming back to the nfl not only back to the nfl they're saying
that he's trying to make a comeback and do it for the bengals oh boy so he wants to not only come
back but fucking come back for the bengals which is crazy in 2010 2010 i heard also that boomer
osiasen approached about a sequel to his book listen cory you're gonna sit down and write a
book with me pal me and you about a a running back who can't just he can't stop punching women in the face it's
gonna be i'll write the first half of the pages then i'll hand it off to you and you finish it
off because i don't know the details about really socking one good and making them bleed from the
mouth it sounds like come on you can describe the thwck. So he's trying to play for the Bengals.
That's spring of 2010.
Early April 2010, his wife files for divorce.
Really?
Desiree files a petition citing irreconcilable differences in L.A. County.
She files this.
What are the differences?
He wants to punch her and she doesn't want to get punched?
I'd like to not be punched.
Well, I'd like to punch her.
I'd like to punch her.
Well, he'd like to go back and get his head fucking bell rung a few more times and I feel like that's
gonna lead to more punching so I'm gonna say no they have three kids they've been married for 10
years Desiree wants full legal and physical custody of the kids with Corey getting visitation
and visits and all that shit I guess he's fine with the kids uh April 21st, 2010, a couple weeks later, he is pulled over at 3.38 a.m.
Hell yeah.
Near Malibu on Mulholland Drive.
Get out of here.
This isn't going to go well.
No.
Not at all.
Where was he?
What fucking bar?
He was driving.
I don't know.
They pulled him over.
Listen to why they pulled him over, though.
This is fucking insane.
Normally, you try to avoid cops, especially if you're drunk at 3.30 in the morning.
Apparently, they noticed a man in a red Chevy Camaro driving slowly right behind them.
He was tailgating the cops.
He was shadowing them.
He was up their ass, and they said that they made a turn, and he stayed behind.
They were shadowing the cops.
It was him and another guy.
Hiding behind them.
So, they fucking put the goddamn lights on and
pulled over and said get the fuck over idiot what are you doing ah he tried to scooby-doo him stay
behind him you can't see us well you got to get real close so they don't see the headlights
that's the thing if you get real close it'll be below their hood holy shit what the fuck are you
doing if you're trying to avoid cops and you see cops you go left turn and they keep going straight especially if you're behind them what do you say we go that way you give it a shot they go
get close what the fuck is wrong with you maybe they think we're real close they'll think we
couldn't possibly be drunk who'd be that stupid i don't fucking know but uh oh that's amazing they
got out and guys said but pardon the fuck are you doing why are you tailgating us you fucking idiots
and cory they said have you been drinking and he goes we but pardon, what the fuck are you doing? Why are you tailgating us, you fucking idiots?
And Corey, they said, have you been drinking?
And he goes, we were drinking earlier in the evening. And they said, get the fuck out of the car, you dumb shit.
What the hell is wrong with you?
Smelled like alcohol.
He's fucking, you know, blows over a.8.
So he ends up getting a DUI and is released on bond.
Like, you dumb.
Why are you doing that?
That's an unnecessary one right there genius
you're looking for talking about looking for trouble i'm impressed with the drunk ingenuity
yeah bury your headlights just get right up behind them and then go slow because they said
cops said they slowed down and he slowed way down too and they're like what the fuck is happening
are they because they thought they were getting ambushed or something. They were like, what's going on?
Don't do that. Or if somebody needed help, too.
They didn't know if somebody was trying to get their attention.
So they're like, what the fuck?
And then they see it's two able-bodied men in a car.
And they're like, what are you doing?
Oh, you're drunk.
I get it now.
Let's go.
Hey, stupid.
Why are you following me?
That's by far my favorite arrest.
That's one of my favorite arrests ever.
It really is.
By far.
He basically pulled the cop over.
We've never had that before.
Officer, I'm drunk. Arrest me.
Pulled me over.
The side of the road.
That's the best arrest in history.
I'm making a citizen's arrest.
Of me.
Of me. Of me.
With your help.
He pulled the cops over.
We've never seen anyone do that before.
That's so awesome.
That's almost as good as the Mitch Blood Green gas station incident.
It's almost as good as that where he just goes, I'll just take a shift.
Start collecting money for gas.
Now at least there's benefit.
This does nothing for him.
I don't know what he was thinking.
I can't imagine what he was thinking. I can't imagine what he was thinking.
Play it cool, man.
Play it cool.
Jesus Christ.
I just want to see what that bumper sticker said.
It said not to beat the shit out of old people.
All right.
I heard him in his blood green.
I was picking up a shift.
He was picking up a shift.
I was pulling you over.
I was trying to help you off, sir.
You were swerving and blurry in my vision.
That's what happened.
It was my view.
You were blurry.
And I was like, they're very blurry.
I should stop them.
It's unbelievable.
You got to stop blurry people because they'll crash.
They're super blurry.
Oh, you're arresting me.
I'm arresting you for being blurry.
You're under arrest for blur
hands behind hands behind your your belly or whatever it is on your on your head
head feet behind your head i just let's go i just laughed at myself blurry
so what a fucking idiot. So yeah,
anyway,
he's a boss bonds.
He gets out.
So that was April 21st,
2010,
uh,
May 2nd,
2010 here.
What?
Uh,
May 2nd,
uh,
at his home in Calabasas,
California,
Dylan and his wife were in the middle of a divorce.
Yeah.
Apparently are arguing over the custody of their child,
which led to,
uh, uh, led to Desiree calling the police for domestic violence.
She claimed that.
Let's see here.
This is that while the cops could tell this had happened to her, but that he did this to her, that Dylan, quote, poured milk over her head, threw water on her, and poured soy sauce on her.
What is he doing?
I mean, I want to congratulate him for not punching her.
That's impressive.
That's restraint.
No.
But he was standing next to the fridge, obviously, and just grabbed everything in there and just started hosing her.
Anything liquid in the fridge.
What the fuck is going on?
What?
There's a barbecue sauce too thick.
Lucky we're not having hot dogs tonight, motherfucker, because I would spray you with ketchup and
mustard like you never fucking believed.
I got a jar of sauerkraut headed for your fucking head.
Poured milk overhead through water on her and then poured soy sauce on her.
During the dispute, apparently here, she also told the cops that she suffered a
superficial cut to her thumb and she's he's arrested and held on fifty thousand dollars
bail yeah and uh yeah later on though after all this goes down she then tells authorities that
he never hit her and her injury wasn't caused by physical contact with him and that she doesn't
want to press any charges.
Really?
So, yeah, she pulls the whole thing back.
But when they showed up, she was covered in milk and soy sauce.
They're pretty sure she didn't do that to herself.
They're reasonably positive that that didn't come accidentally.
Oh, God, you know those packets?
Sometimes when you rip them, they just go everywhere.
You know what I mean?
Clearly.
So, I mean, Jesus Christ, he's he's fucking talked a lot of shit about the Bengals deservedly.
You know, he's had a tough upbringing.
That's fine and dandy.
But he started to take it out on other people.
I mean, his wife's involved in this.
I can't imagine because of the punching while driving, pouring soy sauce on the head and
stuff.
I feel like there's been a lot of incidents with her over it's over the years those weren't the only two things that ever
happened one was just it was a shock because it was the first time maybe and this one was just
because they were getting divorced and she didn't give a fuck but during the marriage apparently i
don't i bet she took a lot of abuse from him 10 i can't be sure obviously but yeah something
happened in 10 years uh it's rare i I hope not. Yeah, right, right.
But it's very rare that the domestic violence call is time one.
That's what I mean.
You know what I mean?
He's for sure dressed her down a time or two.
Something happened.
I mean, I feel bad for her.
I really do.
I mean, I feel bad for a lot of people, but not nearly as bad as I feel for Corey Dillon.
The white man.
Well, this one's a black guy.
Corey Dillon, sales consultant at Toyota of Brookhaven in Jackson, Mississippi.
Corey Dillon, this guy's very white, secret superhero slash Lyft driver.
I hate him.
He's in Phoenix, too.
Get out of here.
Order Lyfts until you get this one and then sock him in the back of the fucking head.
He's a real superhero.
Corey Dillon, manager agronomy.
I don't even know what the
fuck that is oh agronomy it's farm shit manager agronomy research farm at penn state university
wow um hopefully he's not a kid diddler no uh to penn state i hear it all cory dylan corporate
wellness coach in the greater denver area and cory dylan project manager at focus construction llc cory dylan finally cpa mba
federal tech senior staff at crow in columbus ohio so trust cory dylan with your taxes everybody
started rattling out letters i thought you were gonna say fucking like uh nba marital fucking
therapist or something marital thing yeah that would have been perfect
perfect jesus i would love that may 13 2010 they decide prosecutors that they will not file
criminal charges against him uh for the domestic for the soy sauce incident yeah she it turns out
he was just trying a new marinade yeah it was weird that's what the judge judge decided who
am i to say that's not a good marinade it might be delicious i don't know maybe it's a tempura i'm
not sure cake amends is delicious it can be good yeah so june 21st 2010 jesus christ they uh the
office announces that it has charged cory dylan with two misdemeanors in connection with his
drunk driving arrest in april yes He does get charged for that. July
16th, which is court for
the DUI, he pleads no contest
to it. The judge says
you may fuck
off and gives him two years of probation.
12-hour alcohol
program and ordered to pay a
$250 fine.
So that's that. And then laughed his balls off.
And then said, I can't believe you got caught.
So you did what now, stupid?
What are you, stupid?
Jesus, dummy.
What an arrest.
So September 2018, you're asking for it.
I mean, you can't ask for any more than that.
September 2018, his house is for sale here.
Really?
Or his house sells.
Oh.
It's been for sale for a while want to hear
the listing i do kind of do right yeah it's gonna be fucking beautiful welcome to mount calabasas oh
my god a beautiful and exclusive guard gated community in the gently rolling hills of
calabasas the chef's kitchen leaves nothing to be desired with an expansive eat-in breakfast area
pantry butler's
nook gorgeous cabinetry and countertops sub-zero and viking appliances and a center island with
separate sink the floor plan is absolutely ideal and flows perfectly the first floor features a
light and bright formal living room inviting formal dining room with stone fireplace a family
room and fifth bedroom slash maids room yeah the upstairs features a master with large
walk-in closet private office sitting slash sitting room and balcony and a dual fireplace
for master bedroom and bath oh boy three additional bedrooms also have ensuite plus an upstairs office
media room and large entertainment area there is so much room to stretch out and play inside and
out the adjoining outdoor living has an appealing ambiance and is situated to take in the expansive grounds, which encompass a built-in outdoor tiki bar slash barbecue area, gorgeous rock pool with a waterfall feature, water slide and spa, half-court basketball course, and a four-putting surface golf course.
Oh, so it's got, is it like a...
A putting green, I guess.
Four miniature holes?
Beats the shit out of me.
Maybe.
I don't know.
But the house ends up, it was on the market for $2.25 million.
That's only $2.25?
And it ends up being sold for $1.925 million.
Wow!
Yeah, it was outdated inside, I looked at it.
Really?
It needed some updating.
But still, that's a good deal for where it is.
Sub-zero in Vikings.
And for where it is, it's a good deal for where it is and for where it is it's a good deal just for the real estate there uh yeah big it's uh foothills
of the santa monica mountain conservancy zone yeah and uh it's 5,024 square feet for less than
two million big house yeah in that area that's good uh they say a wrought iron staircase is the
first thing you see in the interior hardwood floors and all
that shit very nice uh loft and master suite balcony all this type of cool shit here uh 2019
he's back in the news again last year because well when they when the patriots signed antonio brown
they brought up well like cory dylan cory dylan c Dillon. So he's like, oh, no, he's like, stop comparing me to him.
Now he hasn't even gotten arrested.
My fucking rap sheet.
Clearly, if crime is a fucking prerequisite, I'm a Hall of Famer.
This guy's a fucking rookie.
When does he get arrested?
I'm constantly in jail.
What's his milk and soy sauce recipe?
Shit, probably compared to mine.
So he says he does not like comparisons to Antonio Brown at all.
Yeah, he says he's tired of it.
He doesn't like it.
He's here to set the record straight about his name appearing next to Antonio Brown's.
Tired.
Yeah.
He said, quote, I've got nothing against A.B.
He's a hell of a football player.
He said more about him than Walter Payton.
Yeah, he did.
He gave him higher marks than Walter Payton.
Okay.
In a protection league.
Yeah, in a protection league.
It's interesting.
Antonio Brown couldn't hold the worst player's jockstrap in 72.
Well, athletically, he would kill the guys, but not Walter Payton's jockstrap.
Walter Payton was the shit.
They would light him up over the middle.
They would definitely kill him. Yeah. yeah no they would injure him but not before yeah he would if they before
they caught him and injured him he would fucking run all over the field for i don't know that he'd
catch the ball in that league no because you could still up until 77 you could still murder on the
pass interference was generally legal until then so yeah that, that'd be very hard. So he says, quote, but I find it kind of curious
every time the Patriots do something
or bring a guy in,
my name comes up like I was a bad guy.
I'm trying to set that straight.
He said, if they knew
what I was going through in Cincinnati,
my name wouldn't even be mentioned in that light.
If you want to bring me up to be frank,
I'm a Super Bowl champ.
So why don't you say, go be like cory dylan a super bowl champ who went over
and won one with new england instead of cory dylan this problem player and the patriots picked up and
changed his life no you just yeah he said the time you were with new england you didn't get
arrested man that's the thing you were doing yeah you weren't in super bowls they kind of did that's what it was yeah he said quote the thing about ab i'm praying for my brother i wish
him well it's a it's a perfect setup all he has to do is catch the football all he has to do is
show up and play and catch the football and trust me he'll be knocking on a super bowl it's as easy
as that i'm happy for him i'll'll be watching that. And then he obviously
didn't work out there.
But yeah,
he was happy at first.
Currently,
if you trust
CelebrityNetWorth.com,
which you should never trust
because they say
that we're millionaires,
which is hilarious.
So if you trust them.
Oh, boy.
Well, the world
that they live in,
I want to be in it.
I do, too.
Well, in this world,
Corey Dillon
has $11 million still.
I'll bet he does.
They said earlier that he took care of his chicken.
He took care of his money, and he sold his house for a couple million, but he also went
through a divorce.
Who knows?
He might have $11 million.
He might have six.
He might have something.
Who knows?
If he was smart with his money, you never know.
I can't get enough Corey Dillon.
Why can't I?
He'll be out there eventually.
But I found on eBay, i found some used bangles
cory dylan jersey for like 35 bucks then i found a cool the old school 70s 80s red patriots jerseys
yeah they'll throwbacks one of those signs on the shoulders yeah signed one of those for the red one
for 189.99 so if you want some cory dylan you can get him there that's that that's game worn no no no it's just signed
it's not game worn it's a regular jersey just game worn that'd be cool as fuck but uh yeah that's
cory dylan everybody and uh yeah cory goddamn dylan that's unbelievable yeah what a story it
is and it's one of those stories where like i didn't really know about it it's amazing that
he had to really go back that's the thing that's what's amazing
for you have to give the guy a shitload of credit for coming from all those arrests i mean he was
in a deep hole right to the point where after high school everybody else in the nfl after high
school they're being recruited hard he didn't have any of that he was off he was being a janitor
getting arrested after high school and he fought
his way back in went to three different colleges and i mean you gotta give the guy a lot of credit
for that i just wish he if he just didn't punch if he just didn't have three different incidents
of violence against women i would be okay with the guy because shit happens respect for him
people drive drunk and they're back stupid or they do stupid shit in the street or they do
shit when they're younger i don't fuck i'm not gonna judge somebody for that as far as their character goes i'm not gonna demonize them but
i've never even thought to punch a woman in the face in the street never that's like yeah that's
where it ends i've never punched a woman in the face while she drives no i've never said i'm gonna
try my new marinade on my wife never so i will say i will tell you i've thought of it if you keep yelling i'm gonna punch you
and then i didn't i'm gonna put soy sauce on you i will tell you that she did keep yelling
one of those two things came true that's good i'm proud of you jimmy so uh yeah that is cory dylan
and uh we hoped you enjoyed that and uh yeah well well, sorry we had some sidetracks in there as well as far as that shit goes.
But it's frustrating.
We're frustrated.
And we're fucking human beings.
I mean, I get it that you don't want to hear politics from us.
And we're talking about shit that shouldn't be politics.
There's no reason in the world it should be.
Our politics are common sense.
That's our politics.
We're very fucking logical people. That's all we care about is does this make sense yeah or not we don't have a team
yeah don't care and and moreover uh my politics are um how's this gonna help because that's what
it is we just have things that help people because i don't have a fucking team on the matter i don't
want to give anybody a goddamn thing but i'd love to help yeah that's what i mean that's what i'm saying i don't give
anybody the best life i want to give them the opportunity and all the help that we can if i
could give everybody the best life great i'd love to i want everyone to have a fucking great life
that'd be wonderful it's not even that but we need just for fucking i don't know man our our
politics are our own and don't fucking worry about it basically we're just people people the
best we're just people and we just don't want crazy shit going on we want fucking we just want
logic i just want logic that's it i just want someone at some point to go hey this is stupid
maybe if this and this because that makes sense we could try that hey good idea that's all i
fucking want is that a lot to ask for?
And you know what?
If my plan doesn't work.
Let's try yours.
Let's try another one.
I don't know.
Just logic.
Let's try yours that sounds logical, too.
Just logic.
It's not a lot to ask for.
Rodney King had a really great quote.
And I'd just like us all to get along.
It's just logic, man.
That's it.
It's all we want that's all we
strive for that's it you know great to these uh to the police's point too the ones that are
really aggressive maybe that will uh create a really great idea like let's all get along
yeah that's gonna beat the great ideas into us and i guess let's try that plan that's good yeah
maybe that'll be the answer now that i think
about well well if you callous the brain as we heard earlier in the episode jimmy if you callous
the brain too late james they should have done that to us when we were oh that's the problem
okay beat your children everybody so that said thanks for listening to the show if you have not
yet please get on apple podcasts, that purple icon.
Give us five stars.
Doesn't matter what you say.
Just please write something because it helps drive us up the charts.
And God damn it, we know that we could use that.
It always helps.
Also, go to Shut Up and Give Me Murder dot com for everything crime and sports and small town murder related.
You can get all your stuff there.
Merchandise tickets to live shows. It's a onestop shop for everything possible with crime and sports and small-town murder.
And then you should be listening to small-town murder every damn Thursday when it comes out.
Get your ass on there.
Subscribe.
It'll fucking download.
Do that.
Also, PSA, I hate this movie.
Every Friday, you lazy bastards, get on that, too.
So listen to that.
It's going to be good times had by all.
As always, please follow us on social
media we are at crime and sports on twitter and facebook at small town murder on instagram there
and uh yeah also if you want to be a hero of ours god damn it not only a hero of ours but you'll be
a producer you'll have your name said and you will get access to tons and tons of great bonus material
that we do we put out a lot of bonus shit we're gonna keep doing it we're gonna keep doing all
the bonus stuff so uh sign up for that anybody over the five dollar level will get access to
all the shows for crime and sports and small town murder bonus so everything and uh next week i think
we might go back to doing let's do a bonus of those classified ads again that was fucking fun
i'll find a shitload of crazy classified ads and we'll make that the crime and sports bonus next week
because that's a good time i'm gonna get a good key of what those fucking uh letters yes do that
find that we'll be prepared and understand what these fucking people are talking about
talking in code jesus the letters used to cost by the by the cost of the letter yeah so you
gotta do a little code.
But you can be one of those people and get your name read and everything at patreon.com slash crime and sports.
Or head over to PayPal if you just want to be a nice person and give us some money because you're a nice person.
You can do that very easily over at PayPal using our email address, crimeandsports at gmail.com.
That's also a good way to get a hold of us.
And that said, speaking of getting a hold of us, these people that you're going to mention have gotten a hold of us not only
that they've given us money and they're wonderful people and they deserve their name said and i will
not stop jimmy pour it over my head like a bottle of soy sauce the names of the greatest people in
the world this week's executive producers are stephen rude tr Tracy Mitchell, Jordan Bennett, Ryan McCluskey, Melissa Turner, Clay Thorson, and his pups Odin and Loki.
They're his pug.
He had to put his dog down last year.
He got two new pups.
Oh, no.
And it's their birthday also.
Hey.
Thanks, Clay.
Appreciate it.
There's a lot going on there.
There really is.
Clay's got a deep well of emotion happening.
going on there really it's clay's got a deep uh a deep well of emotion happening christine palmer uh nash esserman s esserman uh amanda what did i do shit is that lewis or laws or lands
oh my god i'm the worst i'm sorry amanda uh mj christy hoveninen probably not eileen uh
okachella i think what? Chris Valdez.
Riddell Turner.
Joshua Neil Clements.
Maria Cephas.
Rob Beer.
Eileen with no last name.
Lori Shandor.
Allie Manlove.
Tinas Yo, I think.
There was a bunch of Es.
I'm sure I didn't pronounce that right.
Casey.
What did I do?
KB?
Martin?
I think it's Casey.
Casey Martin.
That's what that is.
What have I done?
Dan Burnight. Chris DeYoung. Carolyn Cr it's Casey. Casey Martin. That's what that is. What have I done? Dan Burnight.
Chris DeYoung.
Carolyn Criglow.
No.
Yeah.
Lauren Kyle.
Giacomis.
Talk.
What?
What is it?
Giacomarius.
Talk.
The Ritrix.
I don't know what that is. My God.
I did my best.
Valerie Wilson.
Carrie Ann Castellano. I don't want to fuck thatellano she's connected uh cheyenne eden finnelli probably
connected also erica uh still burman still burman ma'am don and tanner i don't know if it's and or
just like the letter n so thank you don and tanner maybe uh jess cam Jess cam, Jennifer new and Joelle's Lopez.
Thank you guys so, so much for everything you do.
We can't do it without you.
Other producers this week are Zach goalies that it's his birthday.
His brother says he's ugly, but he listens to the show.
So sorry, Zach, your brother hates you.
Liz Vasquez, Tracy Mitchell, Michael Perry, Susanna Platt, Amanda Knight, Paul Williams,
Naomi, I think, Simpson?
I think that's what I wrote.
Probably not.
Ashley Veo, Jennifer Visconti, Christine Lyschel, Dontre Brinson?
Deontre, sorry.
Lindy Simmons, Justin Monroe, Kristen Richards, TJ Bartlett, Peyton Meadows, Amanda Turner, Will with no last name, Gene
Lyon, James Marder, John DeLong, John Knickerbocker, Christy Dodson, I think.
Seems reasonable.
Yeah.
Jillian Graziola, Grazioso.
Fuck up all the Italian names I know.
I know.
This guy's got a terrible Italian name.
I love spaghetti.
I really do.
And on every other- I love spaghetti. I really do. And on every other.
I love spaghetti.
Every other goddamn thing you guys make.
Reagan Schalkley.
Stephen Schnell.
Thanks, Steve.
Yeah, thanks, buddy.
Alex Robertson.
What is that?
Alzea?
No.
Alex Marchantante?
No.
Isabelle O'Brien.
Sorry, Paisan.
Serena Lewis.
Lex Lozia. Alex lozoya hey uh mariah mariah kip soosley maria kip it's just kip soosley on uh twitter i think uh michael oh
shit sent she and me kim perry adrian trial or trill uh ben lambert, Anthony Knott, Gabby Giavese-Nate, Raphael Corno, Sam and Wendy Susan Stocker, Liz Bryan, Eric Smith, Allie Smith, Janice Hill, Robin Anderson, Ma G, Megan Malcolm, Thomas Brown, Danielle, Yep. I got it. I got this one, everybody.
Thomas Brown.
Danielle.
Jackie Sukup.
Rachel Lambert.
Jonathan West.
Monica Bailey.
Mindy Debus.
Eric Cefali.
I am not aroused by feet.
I don't believe you.
Diana V.
Austin Beamer.
You had to mention that.
I can't believe you.
Crystal Walker.
Stephanie Hicks.
Mary Carter Gohl.
Rosie Capagli. Pagli. Again. See? Guys. Kapagli, Jerry Exxon, Noah Marby, Pink
Zebra, Independent Consultant, Dominique Baljoma, Jocelyn Meyer uh lisa cerilli i'm not doing that on purpose
chase forbes jillian lindeman uh laura blakesley joe leslie uh ava ava atkison matt nixon kristin
olden uh katie price christopher palco andy with no last name amanda rutherford laura reina stanton
parson dick minge yeah i said it again uh anthony uh columbaro uh holy shit laurel christian i'll
call the headquarters and let them know nicole moore call the knights of columbus i'll call the
knights of columbus hall and let them know it's the, call the Knights of Columbus. I'll call the Knights of Columbus Hall and let them know.
It's the Sons of Italy Hall.
I'll give a call down there.
Sony Blackham?
Backlum.
I don't know.
Quinn Kunzikinski?
No.
All right, take that, Pollock.
One for you.
Allison Mead, Jamie Newsome, Matt Zick, Nicole Allison, Keith Marker, Marler, Tanya H., Alexander Rehnertz,
probably not, Emily Malinowski, Jennifer Wright, Kethia Alvarenga, Jessica Dixon, Michaela
Danby, David Tacharous, damn it, Tatterzook, Andrea Lura, Paige with no last name, Ryan
Daxton, Jess Liu, Mark O'Brien, Jester Lackey, Lauren Gray, Lizzie Stumbaugh, Mate Ruiz-Smith,
no, Matey, Mayette, I don't know.
He's a mate.
Rice Williams.
What's up, mate?
Thanks, mate. Rice Williams. What's up, mate? Thanks, mate. Lee Main.
Trisha Hinkle.
Lucy Vasquez.
Allie Kirk.
Carlton Klein.
Benjamin Baker.
Jaw would know last name, so obviously rule.
Josh Brooks.
Thanks, Jaw.
Brent Howard.
Jacob would know last name.
Kelly Carlson.
Kay Birch.
Allison Davenport.
Tyler would know last name.
Craig Livermore.
No, Norman.
What? Dominique
Cherie. Hayden Owens. Elizabeth
Dixon. Jennifer Long O'Hare. Damon
Thompson. Jacob Stormont.
Martin Lewis. Williams. What?
William White. Krista
Graham. Jeremy Scribner.
Scribner. Summer Stanley.
Cassandra Pyle Bacho.
Gina Dillon.
Stephen. No, that's Sean. Briley, Stephen, that's why,
Steve Tancredi, Shannon Sullivan, William Wetzel of the Pretzel Fortune.
Thank fuck.
Tyler White.
Some of that pretzel money up in this bitch.
Tyler Whalen, Tyrus Blazy.
I'm spending pretzel money this month, everybody.
Deanna Buck, Tim McBride, Dylan Alexanderlexander sean kelly robert cook fred widmore
neva with no last name alexandra studer uh aaron fishel lisa atkinson chavone no chavone valley i
think uh chris mc uh chris gregory steph uh stephanie olgan martin williams dustin manley
megan matthews uh angela rus Russell, Amanda Hickling, Miles Wilson,
Robert with no last name, Krista Hale.
What is that?
Oh, boy.
Zach Allen.
That's what that is.
Good Lord.
James Jordan, Bradley Vander Kay, I think.
Paul.
Paul.
Paul.
Vamos.
Vamos.
Vamanos.
Vamanos.
Michael Miller, Cameron Big Sexy Orte ortega no you don't get to do
that come on jacob bender kevin buckley john john b taylor charles oh oh boy what did i do
ovesny kyle ocoin i'm gonna change his name to charles oh boy what did i do
katie wallace jeff jeffrey steel flex probably what no it's not it's a porn name it's jeff uh it
oh it is jeffrey or is it jefferson it doesn't matter really the first name the first name's
irrelevant here andrew simon and peacock char green joseph no jesper no age morgan skeen mel quinn james skelman stephanie steen jay mcfarland uh marguerite
stigliano yes sisley yes that's not it either ah shit skilliano silly ano right okay with the g
that she's silent i don't know it depends on you probably marguerite hey it's a marguerite certainly
yeah liz cummings uh michael hartley page and jul, Chris Davis, Lindsay Jarmaine, Mel Hancock,
Jack Shaw, Dim Hogan.
I dig that.
Nice.
Very impressive.
Rebecca Sykes, Jay Sean Martin, Jamie Moy, what is that?
Solana, Don, Enrique Amaro, no, Amparo.
Jessica would know the last name. Chris would know the last name.o Jessica with no last name Chris with no last name
Lou with no last name Jamie Hoosman
Houseman Sophia
Rosselli yep Samantha
Domina JB
B Mark Shrade
Daniel Daniel Carlos
Rodriguez Figueroa Bryce
Frisky Denise Bray
Daryl Fordham
Sybil Star Cody with no last name rebecca harris thomas
smither smither smither larry butterfast he's fantastic yeah he's a good dude shannon would
know last name roseanne hatch evan gory uh rebecca stearns no jacob stearns what how did
rebecca come sorry jacob jesus christ jacob i don't know what i'm doing wow jesse cooper transition now you know you're
rebecca i've picked it for you uh elissa elissa nesbitt uh beth hicks cody no cardin caden
carpenter yeah carla jerez uh sarah crib emily peters aaron mccain louise louise ryan or ren Louise, Ryan or Wren? Rue. Lori Allen, Lowry Creech, Madeline Everest of Arts.
Monica Nelson, Melanie Martin, Rock City Games.
Aaron Clark, Catherine Blankenship, Amy Easton, Christina Trent.
Dean with no last name.
Aaron McPhee, Atticus with no last name.
Junebug Jones, probably the best name this week.
That's a good one. James McQuaid.
Julie Fierro.
Jocelyn Converse.
What?
Fierro and Converse?
Cool.
Karista Medler.
Caleb Jester.
We're getting close, man.
I like it.
No, we're not.
No?
God damn it.
All right, let's do it.
Thank you, guys.
We love you guys.
Thank you.
Brianne Johnson.
Lindsay with no last name.
Renee Wilson.
John Broyles.
Devon Devin. Devin Sylvia. Kate Norton. Dulce with no last name. Renee Wilson. John Broyles. Devon Devin.
Devin Sylvia.
Kate Norton.
Dulce with no last name.
Aaron Jones.
Cadence.
No, Candace.
Dora.
Is that Jora?
Leahy.
Sydney with no last name.
Regina Clifton.
Laura Cole.
Eric Lord.
Jennifer Kilpatrick.
Heather Trump.
Gabaja Voice Visa.
Nettie.
Nope.
I'm so sorry.
Adrian Padilla. Mike Pisani, Carly Keir, Caitlin, no, Kaylin Horton, JB, Laura Sautter, Jacob Turner, Andrea O'Rourke, Jared
Butler, Jake Metter, Jamie O, Damian Bouchemin, Chantel with no last name, Sherry Littlefield,
Damien Bouchemin, Chantel with no last name, Sherry Littlefield, Dave Bonkeen, Samantha Worry, Pam Bellinger, Desiree Navarro, Jacob Chardonnay, no, Chauvinette, Chauvinard, Bethany
Pryor, I'm doing my, Marley Gore, Sarah Dempsey, Marley Gore, Jordan Kukendall, Becky Copley, Dan Moran, Matilda Carter, Jessica
Sprankle.
No.
Yeah.
MG.
Is that MG Hudson?
I think.
I hope.
Alex Davis, Hannah Davis, Gortage Baines.
I'm sorry.
Slick Rick, Cy Cannon, Jake Merceau, Matt Silette, Trent Becker, Lisa Becker, Sarah Cleveland, Maria Radcliffe, Annette Acevedo, Ines Ishmael, Meg Srendel.
I'm so bad at this.
Dario Moyes, Summer Sidon night sydney summer sydney uh amanda galipo galipo galipo
melissa randall allison tate sylvia smith melissa schmaltz heather hardman uh alicia horner taters
what up i don't know what that is i don't know either but that's a thing josh melhorn shay martin
christy odono leanne hatch monica james uh stephen rossiter
molly with no last name d marie shelly vandenberg robin jerule jarul uh setley more with no last
name uh cody purcell uh ryan andrews joseph miller uh tion marsh now we're close, guys. I think. No, we're not. What happened here?
How did I get so deep?
I don't know.
That sounded gross.
How did I get so deep?
Fotinos.
Jacques Delisle.
Peyton Sportsgirl.
Erica Herrera.
G.G. Girl.
Cassie Kennedy.
Jillian Proctor.
Ashley Britton.
Rebecca Fuller.
Alex with no last name.
Rory Owen.
Cam.
Void.
Bryce.
Abigail Hall. Amanda Sherrill. No.
Stephen Nutter, Kendon, Adam Pulvermaker, Pulvermatcher, Hannah Swan, Fock, Andrew Clark, Messied, Janet M., Sarah White, Katie Hoffman. Kyle Boyack.
And then another Kyle.
Krasowski.
Nina Tedeschi.
Rachel Strauss.
Elizabeth Milbert.
Mike Schmidt Jr.
Probably not.
Really?
Maybe.
That's possible.
We don't know.
Murray?
No.
Mark.
Merv Speaker?
I don't think so.
I think it's Myra.
Samantha with no last name.
Danielle Dole.
Bob's daughter. John Wagner. Serena. No. I think it's Myra. Samantha with no last name. Danielle Dole, Bob's daughter.
John Wegner.
Serena.
No, Serena.
Serena Hernandez.
Daisy Ray Hayes.
Lindsay Burns.
Nicholas.
Allie Miller.
Andrew Gillen.
Michelle Corbett.
Crystal Malinowski.
Raymond Smith.
Sarah Kirschman.
Natalie Foster.
Al Derby.
Lindsay Redman.
Ralph Benetti, Jason,
Jason, Jason, Owens Addison, Lacey Ford, Harry Bridges.
It's gross bridges.
Hey.
Jennifer Justice Thompson, Justice Johnson, Monica Bingham, Sarah Chowman, Akina with
no last name, Elliot Rise Coleman, Jessica McArdle, Niall Gargan, Derek Matthias, Genevieve Capral, Andy with no last name, Lynn Hollier, Trevor Porter, Francis with no last name, Kyle McHenry, Johnny Block, Brent Sheehy, Caleb Brown, Casey Taylor, Miranda Ekstrom, Mackenzie Heron, Katie Watchstein, Tom Kohler, Megan McDonald, Ashley Porter, Brian Johnson, Annette Freeze, Brandon Hall, Nathaniel Redikop, Mary Letta Morgan, Danielle Rickles, Elizabeth Gidland.
Now we're close. I swear to God.
Thank you guys so much for supporting what we do.
Josh Tompkins, Mark Chenier, Jenny Siegel, Ryan Beer, Tyler Sharp, Carly with no last
name, Emma Jones, Jonathan Cox, Jackie Edmiston, Janica with no last name, Nathan Ebaugh, Tyler
Dean, Rachel Colleen, Rachel Schultes, Unicorn Husker, Philip Patrick Breton, Justin Smoleski, Ryan Phillips, Melanie Zicht, Brett Sparks, Tyler Skara, Hey P. Roy, David Mahi, Chelsea Guild, Casey McAllister, Stephanie McClintock, Austin Horton, Laura McAllister,
Zach W., Dylan Mathis, Anne Siegel, Penny D., Christy Larson, Neil Waugh, Mike Spradlin,
Michael Schmidt, Erica Zofchak, Sherry Borner, Colin Etheridge, Samantha Simmons, Danny Hale, JTheMan7724.
Oh, wow.
JTheMan.
Very specific man.
Cole McGregor, Travis Croxford, Becky McKay-Schultz, Ashley Rison, Leroy Walker, Selena Vignod,
Andrea Alicron, Christina Young, Mara Spensieri, Petey Dinky, Kelly with no last name, Anna Morrison, Ian Mitchell, Denise Girardini.
You are right, by the way.
You're on to it.
It's the Italian one. Yeah, you have a hard one with that.
Really, it's all those vowels.
I don't know.
Caitlin Bach, Chris Cotting, Matt Elmer, T3DRUX. a hard one with that really it's all those vowels caitlin caitlin bach uh chris cotting uh matt
elmer t3drux i think that's somebody's license plate jonathan packer uh hayley pierre uh ramsdall
ryan wolf pd dinky i think i said that dylan landquist julia lions eric willis uh russ palmer
angel kurtik sean breen uh what is this cat katie katie latula linda duran campbell lion Russ Palmer, Angel Kurtik, Sean Breen, Katie Latulip, Linda Duran Campbell,
Lion Wegman, Katie Devlin, Noah Chapman, Kate Watkins, Dylan Hamrick,
Karen Dowd, Stormy B with no last name, Aaron Stackman, Brianna Stinson,
Matt McLean, Casey Locke, Amber Parker, Caleb Michael, and we are home stretch, my friend.
I love it. Lindsey Furster, Jesse Shingle, CJ Brighman, Harrison Fryermuth, Brielle Doubtright, Megan Magley, Mitchell with no last name, Brianna Wright, Jenny Stiegel, David Mahe, Erica Moore, Demetrius Fries, Matthew Clark, Vance Casey, Kim Sullivan, Jen Marie, Veronica Botelho, Adam Jones, FoxholeAtheist,
T. Wood, Dyke Memes, Cameron Now, Dr. Greggles, Laura Blakeslee, and all of our Patreon supporters.
Thank you guys so, so much.
Thank you, everybody, so much. Honestly, from the bottom of our hearts, we thank you guys so, so much. Thank you, everybody, so much.
Honestly, from the bottom of our hearts, we thank you for everything you do for us.
We obviously can't do it without you.
No.
And we're just blown away by everything that you do to help us.
So thank you a million times over.
What if they wanted to thank you or insult you or, I don't know, tell you their tempura recipe?
How could they do it?
I'm exhausted with it.
It's WHISMANSUCKS. If youura recipe how could they do it I'm exhausted with it it's WHISMAN sucks
if you can find that anywhere do it
otherwise thank you all so much
for the support of this show because you're
why we do it and you're
making it worth it so thank you where can they
find you can find me at Jimmy P
is funny or just copy and paste my
name and you'll fucking you know how to look at if you want
to find someone you can goddamn look them up people
find where strangers live right you can to look at it. If you want to find someone, you can goddamn look them up. People find where strangers live.
You can find me on social media if you want.
If you found Don Lemon's address, you can find my handles.
Exactly.
So do that.
Find us.
Keep coming back week after week after week.
God damn it.
Live from the Crime and Sports Studios.
We will see you next week.
Bye. Hey Prime members, you can listen to Crime and Sports early and ad-free on Amazon Music.
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