Crime in Sports - #258 - Stabbed & Left For Drunk - The Disquietingness of Warren Wells
Episode Date: June 1, 2021This week, we tell a tale of potential, talent & repeated stupidity. He fought through coming from nowhere, and being drafted into the Army, after his rookie season, only to make a rocket... like rise to superstardom, then comes crashing down, faster than a shooting star. He continues to make mistake after mistake, leaving ex-teammates, family & spouses wondering why he can't get it together. He's a mess, but there is some serious crazy to this tale! Be drafted into the Army, after your rookie season, drink so much that Raiders football players even think you have a problem, and never learn your lesson with Warren Wells!! Check us out, every Tuesday! We will continue to bring you the biggest idiots in sports history!! Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman Donate at... patreon.com/crimeinsports or with paypal.com using our email: crimeinsports@gmail.com Get all the CIS & STM merch at crimeinsports.threadless.com Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things CIS & STM!! Contact us on... twitter.com/crimeinsportscrimeinsports@gmail.comfacebook.com/Crimeinsportsinstagram.com/smalltownmurder See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Stories on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Crime and Sports!
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We have a wild, wild episode.
We're talking some 60s, 70s nfl action so concussions abound we have a there's
a cult tie into this one a cult that we've never talked about before and honestly i've never heard
of this is like a i read about it i'm like where did this how have i never heard of this this is
crazy but the place it was happening and the time it was happening it was overshadowed by jonestown
oh basically late 70s northern california yeah that was jonestown time it was happening, it was overshadowed by Jonestown. Basically, late 70s, Northern California.
That was Jonestown time.
You could commit any crime you want
in 2001. It was going to go away pretty
quick. Yeah, that's the thing.
Second those towers fell, mob guys went,
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I'm just saying. That's Gary Condit.
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you and thank you so much for everybody that does that that said yeah let's give you some show here
because we got a lot of show and it's a just a weird ass this is a
very strange guy he he's got a lot of parallels to oil can okay there's a lot of parallels and
kind of the the manner of his growing up and um some other things but then he doesn't quite have
it together as much as oil can because of the time when it happened.
We understood even less about all this stuff.
And instead of getting someone proper help, they just make them literally a judge sentenced him to go to a cult for 90 days.
Like they didn't know what to do.
So it's it's an interesting tale.
Let's talk about Warren Wells.
You know, he is never never heard of him.
He's late 60s Raider.
And, you know, kind of the beginning of that real Raider thing.
The stereotype.
Yeah.
And he was a big part of it.
He was a great receiver.
Just a fantastic receiver that one of those guys where people go, what the hell happened to that guy?
He was great and then he was gone.
He didn't like fizzle.
He was in the Pro Bowl and then you never saw him again.
Wow.
It's the weirdest thing in the world,
and it's because his life completely spun out of control
in just a myriad of arrests and disaster.
Social media and the Internet didn't exist, so you didn't know.
Nobody knew, yeah.
It's just kind of if you're reading the paper.
So Warren Wells, born November 14, 1942.
So an older gentleman here obviously born jesus i
mean mid-world war ii here my god the war effort was cranking up for us at this point uh he's born
in franklin louisiana okay um he uh i guess he lived there for a minute but he was born in fremont
louisiana yeah and uh he said he recognized the they moved to Beaumont when he was very little.
Beaumont, Texas, his family.
Oh, my.
Yeah.
But they when they moved, they thought Beaumont would be better for them as a black family than Louisiana.
Fascinating.
And it didn't work out that way.
He said that he he he found what he called, quote, Southern justice down there.
That was a little bit different.
He says, quote, I know all about them Jim Crow laws.
I know the separate but equal stuff.
I know about separate water fountains riding the back of the bus and entering the rear of the store.
I've seen those colored only and white only signs hanging over the restrooms.
I was confused as a kid as to why they were there.
But through it all, I really can't say that i'm angry which is just not mad it's so strange he says that and he said i'm not the only person ever go through it so i'm not going to be angry about
it and uh it's a very it's a very older school it's a fascinating way of looking at things it's
old school it's it's not not that that's a good way i'm just saying like that was like that's kind of the way a lot of people
thought back then they weren't everybody's going through it doesn't make it right that's the thing
yeah but it's very strange he says quote i can see why caucasians acted the way they did and still do
but i can excuse them for it what you don't do that why can you see that how
that why would they i can't see why they would say i don't want to go to the bathroom with it
i can't sit on that toilet now why my shit's better than his shit do you know how good my
shit is i eat white food and my shit comes out better he eats all this black food and his shit's
different so he can't touch where his thighs touch We can't put it in the same pipes.
What are we doing here?
Like, that makes no sense.
That's bananas.
None.
None.
I mean, Jesus Christ.
He said, quote, my parents brought us up strict.
They didn't believe in stealing or getting into trouble.
It was like a sin if we missed a day of school.
So he, you know, he came up in an old school.
I mean, he's born in 42.
Right.
So we're talking.
That's weird.
That's a weird time.
He was done with college pre-civil rights.
Wow.
So that's a totally like he talked about oil can growing up.
He was born in 55.
This man's 18 years old in 1960.
That's what I mean.
Wow.
That's wild, man.
He's like the age of the kids in Greece.
Right.
You know what I mean?
He's my grandparents.
Yeah.
That's what I'm saying. It's a weird thing. age of the kids in greece right you know what i mean he's like he's my grandparents yeah that's
what i'm saying it's a it's a weird uh it's a weird thing so him coming up then that's really
a different thing than oil can did he go to vietnam no we'll talk about that uh yeah he goes
to herbert high in texas here which apparently has produced some good football talent for a lot
of the uh historically black universities have uh yeah a lot of talent football talent for a lot of the historically black universities.
Really?
Yeah, a lot of talent from there.
As a matter of fact, Warren and 12 other football players from that school were given the key to the city in 1971 as like a good representation of all.
Yeah, for Beaumont.
Fascinating.
It's pretty cool.
His dad's name was Henry and his mom's name was Julia.
So no junior situation here. So that's terrific. It's pretty cool. His dad's name was Henry and his mom's name was Julia. So no junior situation here.
So that's terrific.
It's effective.
That's good.
He grew up in a place called Hollywood Village, which in Beaumont, Texas is really, that's
like a mirage.
Yeah.
It's really.
Hollywood Village.
That's, oh.
It's Parson, that word.
Pretty dusty.
It's really, utilizing it.
It's pretty dusty here.
Yeah.
Never realized Hollywood could be so dusty.
There are no hills for that song.
What is this?
Just stick it over there and we'll stand on our roof if we want to see it.
So he played there at Herbert High for a coach named Clifford Ozen,
who apparently was like one of these legendary Texas high school football coaches.
There's a lot of those.
A lot of those. He was like one of those coach Texas high school football coaches. There's a lot of those. A lot of those.
He was like one of those, you know, coached forever and all that sort of thing.
He graduates from Herbert High in 1960,
and I guess he has some interest from local colleges to go play,
and he takes the advice of his coach and goes to Texas Southern,
where he becomes an All-American.
So, I mean, damn good here he uh majors in elementary education oh he's there smart oh he's not a
dumb guy at all warren that's the thing he's not stupid at all and uh it's almost like you
you kind of wish he was more stupid because then you could figure some of the shit he's doing out
but you're like why are you doing this sir later on how is it
you've come to arrive i'm asking now never mind characters yeah i'd like to know personally so
yeah he goes there uh he's six foot one 190 which back then was a big receiver really oh yeah
receivers were not over six feet very much but yeah everybody was kind of smaller if you were
over six feet you were playing on a line somewhere.
The cough is not a big deal.
No.
Or you're playing tight end.
Cliff branch.
Wasn't a big guys,
five,
10 or something.
These guys aren't very big.
So six,
one,
one 90 was considered a big giant receiver that could,
you know,
back off a defensive back and,
you know,
block them out for a ball and shit like that.
So he's considered a very big target.
He,
uh,
1964 NFL draft comes along and he doesn't so he's considered a very big target he uh 1964 nfl
draft comes along and he doesn't think he's even gonna be doesn't even pay attention to it because
he doesn't think he's going to be drafted or anything like that it just he does declare it
happens yeah yeah he's just available i don't even know if you had to declare or if you were
just available after the four years just look at who's graduating put them all on the list yeah i
think so because i just majored in political science i don didn't play football. I'm not even playing football.
I don't know.
We like the look of it.
We like the cut of your jib, kid.
You have a chiseled jaw.
You look like you do all right.
You know what I mean?
Now, 1964, number one overall draft pick, Jimmy.
Dwight Eisenhower.
I don't know.
It was Calvin Coolidge, actually.
It was the number one draft pick.
Number one overall is Dave Parks.
Oh.
Yeah, there you go.
He played for nine seasons, I guess, here for San Francisco.
Number one overall.
Number two and number three picks are both Hall of Famers.
Bob Brown, he's a tackle for the Eagles, so I don't know, a 1960s tackle.
But Charlie Taylor, the wide receiver for Washington, is a huge star.
Those early 70s Washington Super Bowl teams, he was a big, giant part of those.
Yeah, he was a great player there.
Let's see.
What do we got?
Carl Eller, who's a defensive end for Minnesota.
I know that name.
Part of the Purple People Eaters there.
That's why I know it.
He's a Hall of Famer.
He's number six overall.
Paul Warfield, the Hall of Fame wide receiver, who is a great, great wide receiver.
He's drafted by Cleveland, but he played for, I don't know.
What the fuck did Warfield play for?
The Bears?
God damn it.
Now I'm losing my mind because I'm mixing him up with.
It's clearly the Expos.
I'm mixing him up with Don Maynard in my head, who's the Jets guy.
I would have no clue.
Shit, that's going to drive me crazy.
It's not the chick from Night Court?
I believe it is actually yes uh
that's that's her dad actually it's marcia warfield's dad paul which it might be probably
i don't fucking know i have no idea yeah maybe she could have played some football
so my favorite though number 12 overall by the new york giants they draft joe don looney
oh which is a fantastic fucking name perfect Perfect name. Joe Don Looney.
I love that name so much.
Sounds like a country singer.
Yeah.
And Dick Evie I like as well.
Sounds like that.
I don't know why the Bears drafted him.
Number 17 overall, which, by the way, is in the second round back then because there's only 14 teams.
Holy shit.
Number 17 overall is Mel Renfro, who is the hall of fame cowboys longtime cornerback
great defender and then number 18 is paul kraus who's a hall of fame defensive back as well so
yeah what is it one two three four five six hall of famers in the first unbelievable in the first
28 picks that's awesome it's pretty goddamn good for this draft that's not too shabby uh finally
round 12 which would be they don't even
have round 12 now they only have seven but back then that was only pick 160 is round 12 it's like
fourth round now yeah that's shit i don't even think it's yeah it's like fourth round and uh
the detroit lions pick warren okay here so he was surprised yeah he's like oh shit they who
what now i'm gonna going to go to Detroit.
I got I just got a job, man.
Snows there.
Shit.
I'm sending out resumes.
I don't know.
Trying to send out resumes to teach second grade.
I don't know what the fuck's going on here.
He said he was surprised a lot. He says, quote, When I got picked up by the Detroit by Detroit, I was at college at the
coffee shop having coffee.
And the Houston Post called me and said, Look, your name is in the paper.
You were drafted by the Lions. I told i told him man don't do that and he said no look your name is in the paper so he showed it to me and my heart went all over my body a little joker like me going to the
detroit lions that gave me chills i looked up and a lion came in my heart which sounds disgusting
a lion came in my heart he was on the roof he's like i take
that and i was like oh that's not good for my looked up they come from the heavens i maybe i'm
not sure yeah lions they will they jerk off from above onto you so they can come in your heart
it's a big it's a big shot it'll goes up real high harden your arteries i'll tell you that much
lion came in my heart lion came in my heart so Lion came in my heart. So he's very excited.
He's a member of the Detroit Lions.
And 12th round, though, just guarantees you nothing.
That's basically, I've seen a lot from back then.
They're inviting you to come see if you can do this.
Well, yeah.
What they used to do is basically like the first eight or nine rounds,
they would look for actual people.
And then after that, they would start letting secretaries and shit make picks shit make picks because they knew those people were going to get cut anyway wow so
it'd be like somebody in the organization would be like i like his name or i went to that little
school or some shit like that and they'd pick the guy just because you know whatever like how girls
yeah they're uh march madness bragging yeah like oh that's a villanova that sounds i like the way
that that sounds italian it sounds like a nice restaurant a nice car yeah guys do that too that's the fun i know
guys that have done that too because they don't know shit about anything it's hard to follow
college basketball i get why people do it but there's so many schools so many dudes and the
turnover is super high yeah there's like 150 teams and they got the turnover of an olive garden they
they yeah they come in and put the turnover of a fucking Chevron station.
They just knew one year and done if they're any good.
And they move on to the next kids, and there's so many kids.
It's crazy.
It's hard.
So he's going to the Lions.
He's very, very excited, though.
Lions coming all over his heart.
Now, he already likes to drink.
He likes to drink.
At this point, in the 70s he
starts to reflect on his drinking in the 60s and he says that he's been drinking booze since high
school pretty hard yeah but now keep this in mind what he's saying here because i'll have a
completely different story in a little while right total he'll blame it on something completely
different where you're like you said you were right what he blames it on the raiders and you're like you can blame the raiders for a lot but you said you were drinking well
before that in high school that means you drank a shitload in college in texas yeah it's quite a
lot of beer drinking going on there high school really saying i drink a lot though is it's that's
questionable it's hard to you can't really drink it's not like you can drink every day it's hard
to put a value on how much a lot is in high school you binge once in a while on friday
that's it and then you drink your ass off on the weekend but what in front of your parents like
yeah you're not sitting there you're not sitting there watching the game with a scotch in your hand
that's not happening let's just drink it yeah give me another one my ice has melted yeah so uh he says
quote it started when we which as he means herbert high
won the school's first state championship we threw a party and a few of us got messed up
drinking thunder chicken which i think he means thunderbird oh yeah cheap wine all right yeah so
thunder chicken is what people will call it the coach found out and we got into trouble how the
hell did he find out what are you doing doing? Well, they're kids, James.
They're drunk children.
It's pretty obvious. Drunk on cheap wine.
Probably the maroon stained puke all over their shirts probably gave it away.
I would imagine.
That smells like berries of some kind.
It doesn't smell like wine.
It's not fucking grapes.
What are you guys drinking?
Yeah, it smells like puke.
That's what that is
i know a drunk child when i see it yeah
how did they find out he said uh i didn't start drinking heavily though until i got to the pros
with the detroit lions okay until then i was afraid to put a cigarette in my mouth i was
always afraid of drugs it's a bad medicine i have
a uh i have had a joint now and then i don't know uh why i drank more i just liked it and so uh he
says though now in this as of the 70s later on he says i think i've beaten it it's best not to drink
up uh yeah he says you know but he won't stop drinking forever though no this is like later
on when he's had his whole life has been destroyed by alcohol.
He says those Christmas holidays always come up.
They do.
So that's the thing about booze.
It is so hard to stop all of it.
Yeah.
You love it and you pair it with having fun.
Yeah.
Because every month, I mean, our whole society is built around every month there's something
to celebrate.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
To try to distract us and keep us going towards something.
Well, keep us from offing ourselves.
It's New Year's.
You have a day off to look forward to is what it is.
That's all.
You have Valentine's to look forward to.
Yeah.
Or at least get your ass out there and buy something.
Then you have St. Patrick's to look forward to.
And all these things include booze.
All of it.
But for the most part, people can partake in that and then not do the same drinking like
a monster in between those
two holidays that's the thing but for people who are alcoholics they can't just drink on that all
day at all or you know in moderation period i like to drink every day and now i can't do that
every day and then i need to spend time with my family who i fucking yeah and stress and all that
the only way i can deal with that is with the shitload of booze and that's and then i get mean to them yeah not me but that's and then everybody tells me i have a
problem and i have to go home fuck he never thinks he has much of a problem no no he's always like i
got this all right most certainly does not got this thing about alcoholics yeah that's the thing
so 64 he's on the detroit lions which is weird. I read a book about the 63 Detroit Lions.
So, like, looking at their roster and shit, like, I knew a bunch of the players.
I knew kind of what their vibe was.
The 63, there's a book called Paper Lion.
George Plimpton wrote it.
He's an old writer, and he used to go do, like, kind of, he'd go put himself in situations that he didn't belong in and write about.
Embedded reporter.
Yeah.
So, he was a member of the Detroit Lions during training camp as a quarterback.
So he was telling all about that experience.
And he's like a real kind of floofy writer,
very educated, that sort of thing.
Educated, but also hyperbole.
Yes, and he's like, I don't know what to do here.
This is all these people in their jockstraps
and that sort of shit.
So it's an amusing book just to hear about how the behind the scenes of how football players were in 1963.
Yeah.
Because they were nothing like they are now.
Because they weren't wealthy.
Right.
They were like a bunch of guys.
They weren't a business then.
Now it's not just the business of football, but then the person is also a business.
It's too much.
They're a bunch of regular guys that like, you know, they all they still do this in some training camps.
But they all slept in a big dorm and they had to play like little pranks on each other, all like little kids.
And then, you know, they all had like neighborhood bars they hung out at because they weren't wealthy people that lived in some exclusive enclave.
They lived in the neighborhood with the same.
They made the same money as a bricklayer.
Sure.
I mean, it wasn't that big of a deal back then.
a bricklayer sure i mean it wasn't that big of a deal back then so uh yeah 64 they go seven five and two under coach george wilson who's a real character in that book to hear about he's a trip
this guy um so yeah they still played in tiger stadium then which is so weird to think about
george wilson yeah george wilson's not the bad guy and i think it's dennis the menace's name
mr wilson i think they maybe they named it Wilson. I think maybe they named it after him. Definitely.
Yeah.
Maybe they named him after him because he's supposed to be like an old grumpy man.
I'll bet you're right.
Is the guy who made Dennis the Menace from Detroit.
If we find that out, it's probably him.
That's probably him. That would be amazing if we just put that together.
And everybody else in the world knew that?
Yeah, everyone else knew that.
They're like, yes, stupid.
Well, everybody really old knew it, I guess.
At least two assholes deducing common knowledge. Yeah. yes, stupid. Well, everybody really old knew it, I guess. Listen, these two assholes deducing common knowledge.
Yeah, dummy.
But how many people know who the fuck George Wilson is
other than Dennis the Menace's neighbor, honestly?
So there you go.
Do they call oranges oranges because they're orange?
Is that what it is?
Or maybe orange is orange because of oranges.
We never know.
So he only played in nine games, didn't start any.
He's a rookie 12th round draft pick, so excessively lucky to make the team.
Oh, fuck, yeah.
You had to be, because you were an automatic cut.
They weren't even thinking about you.
So you had to stand out to the point where they took your name off that list
and go, oh, well, number 12 draft pick and fucking play.
It's not even a mistake and you're out.
You're already out.
You're already out.
You have to just shine continually and just be like, holy shit, this guy.
He only has two receptions for 21 yards this year.
So very little playing.
I returned some punts and that sort of stuff.
That's mainly what he's doing.
He's not really doing much.
So after the 64 season, and this happens to players now all the time, is you come home after the season.
Sometimes they don't live in the city they play.
Because football isn't like, it's only once a week.
I get that there's practices and stuff,
but a lot of the guys seem to live in other places.
Yeah.
It's not like baseball where you have to drive to the stadium every day.
I don't know.
It seems, plus the baseball season's longer.
And today with them having more money,
they certainly live in other places with a little
apartment wherever it's on their end.
Yeah, or a big apartment.
It's bigger than my house.
Yeah, that's what I mean.
But in comparison to their little abode.
To the comparison of their mansion and wherever they're from, their hometown.
In comparison to wherever they hide away their wife so that their road gash doesn't see her.
Their mansion where they played college so they can still bang college girls because
there's giant murals of them up on the wall because they made it to the nfl i'll bet a lot
of them do that just because the home squish that you can get is probably way deeper than on the
road absolutely well so living it's probably pretty deep everywhere honestly but if you live
in beaumont and keep your wife there while you play for the vikings yeah i'm sure it's a deeper
pool there it's probably yeah that's what a lot of guys would do and they i know a lot of teams had like a i know like the
old lakers in like the 70s and 60s had a rule where like the the wives were not allowed you
were not allowed to have the wives cross each other really yeah like you keep your fucking
wife away from my fucking wife because they can't be talking yeah because they'll start putting two
and two together no they chit chat and our stories start not jiving then my life doesn't jive and i'll kick
your ass get out of luck here and i don't want to give her half my shit is what they're all saying
half my fucking contract so they were yeah that was the 80s lakers i'm sorry it was the 80s lakers
they used to do shit like that yeah the wives were not allowed like you'd get in trouble if you were
like yeah you know i brought my wife here they were like what are you out of your fucking mind get her the fuck out keep her somewhere else
so uh but guys all the time now they come home after the season they get home and they find a
letter from the army saying they've been drafted that happens all the time when they get home from
an nfl season now right season one in the books now go to vietnam i remember when peyton manning's uh
career was interrupted he had that rookie season he threw like 28 interceptions it was tough and
then he got home and he's drafted into the army it's like can it get any worse now i'm in the
army too and i threw 28 interceptions jesus christ get to afghanistan sir that's what was going on
our freedom please yeah um lucky for him this is 65 is still kind of the
build-up in vietnam and he's not sent to vietnam he's sent to alaska for two years
okay which for a guy who lived his whole life in in the south in fucking louisiana and texas that
is not an easy thing to do even summer has frost on the leaves oh my i just picture him in one of those
big the fur lined hoods like over his face you could just see his face sticking out go man this
is fucking this sucks man jesus christ oh my goodness standing there fuck man i don't want
to be here wind whipping yeah so he does you know over two years in the army so i mean think about
that he was a kid came out of college drafted into the nfl plays in the
nfl and then prime of your athletic whatever the fuck you're gone and then you got to come back and
try to figure out how to play football again that's on a wild if that happened now i think
you never hear that did he just spend two years drinking in alaska i mean i don't know what else
you would do there you're just stationed up there and there's not like a war with the russians
currently happening i don't know what you would do in alaska is that they're on watch
with binoculars pretty much can you see over there no no they're over there though it's snowing i
can't see shit pretty sure it's there somewhere i don't know it's been night for like three days
i'm not sure it's all white in these binoculars all white oh man so after he ends up being
discharged he you know honorable discharge and all that serves
his time, but does his, you know.
Serves his time.
Serves his time.
Yeah.
He ends up joining the Kansas City Chiefs.
Okay.
He gets signed by the Chiefs, which you were a 12th round draft pick who only played for
one season and caught two balls to even get to a camp right now has got to be hard.
It's unbelievable.
I've been in the army for two years.
Like, oh, we didn't really want you
then. Now, are we going to want you after two
years? How slim were the pickings for players if you
need that? I mean, the receivers, though,
that's the thing. A dynamite
receiver back then could change your game
for you. A deep threat could
change the whole game. And
he was a good deep threat. And at 6'1", 1'9",
he was a bigger guy, too. So he was a guy that they
took a look at, figured, what the hell? And he's a likable guy. Everybody likes him. He's a good deep threat, and at 6'1", 1'9", he's a bigger guy, too. So he's a guy that they took a look at, figure what the hell.
And he's a likable guy.
Everybody likes him.
He's a guy who's got a great attitude.
He shows up.
He's not fucking mad at segregation.
That's a good point.
You know what I'm saying?
Go along to get along.
I was going to say, he's a go along to get along guy.
I mean, if a guy's like, I can't be mad at people for that, you're like, whoa, you are
really forgiving.
Like, holy shit.
A guy who's never gone along so well yeah
i mean it's but back then people used to do the army thing all the time ted williams fought in
two fucking wars during his baseball career it's unbelievable he had two different stints of did
not play war did not play war 10 years apart it's staggering as a pilot hank aaron jackie robinson
joe dimaggio stunning yeah i mean joe dimaggio had his 56 game
hitting streak you know jolton joe that songs and all this shit and then he was in the fucking army
the next year like he was the biggest star in the country and then gone and and you know they'll
never do that again uh thanks to pat tillman yeah i saw how well that worked out that does not go
well for him at least to just draft people.
Well, back then, too, if you didn't volunteer, people thought you were a pussy and they didn't like you.
Right.
So, like, you had to sign up if you were a ball player just to show that you were patriotic.
Those names, too, granted they're unbelievable at their sport, but those names are, they'll never be forgotten.
No, no.
And I'm sure that's part of it because a parent is going to push you to look up to somebody like that because they're doing that and that?
Yeah, it's kind of hard to see Hank Aaron and go, yeah, don't be like that guy.
Don't like him.
Don't be super successful and respected by everyone on earth, please.
No one likes that.
Don't be the best.
That's bad stuff.
No one wants that shit.
So he's cut by Kansas City in training camp.
Oh, no.
Coach Hank Stram there, legendary coach.
Those old NFL films, he's the guy in the red Chiefs blazer with the big Chiefs logo on it,
running down the sidelines, pumping his fist and shit.
Or that red and orange and that fucking plaid thing.
Yeah, that too.
Ugly, horrible jacket with the Chiefs logo on it.
Looking at that in those early Super Bowls, you always see him running down the sidelines.
Hank Stram had some ties to gamblers and shit like that.
He's a real interesting guy there.
When he went to New Orleans and coached there,
he had some issues with mob guys and gambling,
and they were all, there was some stuff going on.
So he's cut there,
so he probably thinks football's kind of over for him at this point.
But finally, one team has the balls to take a flyer on him.
And one guy, honestly, not one team.
It's Al Davis and the Raiders.
He's the guy who if you throw it out, he's the guy who's out in front of your house looking through your garbage pile, making sure that everything you threw out isn't there's not something useful in there.
And if he finds one thing that's useful, one beer koozie that's not completely stained with food,
he'll wipe it off and put it in his pocket and he can use it for later.
Jam a Coors in it.
It's a fact.
It's keeping my beer cold.
Yeah.
And he found a lot of great players like that.
He's like a hoarder.
He is.
But he found a lot of great players like that.
And more importantly, he found players that had chips on their shoulders from being caught by other people.
Angry fellas.
Angry fellas that wanted to prove themselves.
Surprisingly enough, somebody that's angry utilizes that talent very well.
In a violent sport.
Right.
It's pretty good.
When you can legally unleash that person to impose their will, they do really well.
Absolutely.
He comes in, though, and he's very rusty.
He hasn't played in years.
And he barely played before that, so it's hard.
He's the longest of long shots to make this team.
You've got all your draft picks, and then you've got some guy who was in the Army and was cut by the Chiefs.
This is a pretty decent team.
They're good in the late 60s.
They're a great team, and they're really becoming a really good team.
There's great players that you've got to compete with to get a spot.
Oh, absolutely.
They have great players.
And he's, you know, he's coming in kind of the last guy on the end of the bench to try to make a team.
He's just kind of a camp body almost.
And but he he tries.
He said, quote, I was on the field doing a left face instead of running oh
no he was totally out of what he was doing as the quarterback was telling me to run the route for
him he was looking down at me doing an about face or something but after a year or so my moves just
got la just got like when i was in high school so it just took him a while to get used to all
coming back to me yeah it's a muscle memory thing, I would think. If you're used to marching. Sing it, meatloaf.
The wait is over.
So far, you're not losing.
The only thing you're losing is my patience.
Quickly, I see that.
Bing!
The queen of the courtroom is back.
I didn't do anything.
You wouldn't know the truth if it came up and slapped you in the face.
I see he's not intimidated by anything. I can't know the truth if it came up and slapped you in the face. I see he's not intimidated
by anything. I can fix that.
New cases.
She wanted to fight me.
Leave her alone.
Okay, so, um...
This is not a so. This is a
period. Classic
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You married his cousin.
His brother. That's not him.
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So this is what he says about drinking later on.
He'll say this in 1999.
So the first quote was from 1979.
It was about the 60s.
This is from 1999 he says quote i
didn't know what beer was before oakland no no you knew what thunderbird was no which is worse
than beer so um were you keistering thunder chicken what are you talking about i don't know
what the fuck he's talking about he said i'd go with the older players to their bars and we'd
drink draft beer after meals.
They'd call me to drink and have the pitcher on the table and I'd drink with them.
But my mind was out on the field at all times.
I didn't care to be drinking, but they'd buy the drinks.
So it started in Oakland.
Yeah.
No.
He said it started in Detroit a minute ago or 20 years before that.
Listen, James, when you drink that much, sometimes you forget dates.
And also when you've been hitting the head quite a bit, too happens as well sure um so 1967 he's on the raiders uh
coach john roush who kind of built this team he built that that uh late 60s and into the 70s
raiders thing was like the badass defense the fucking long ball throwing bombs daryl and monica
just chucking that shit in the air
then it changed when stabler came in it was a became a different kind of an offense but they
still al davis loves the deep ball yeah even later on he signed jeff george in the 90s just because
he's like he's got a gun he can imagine if he throws it under tim brown and he's running out
oh my god it is a fast it's a really exciting thing when that happens when it comes together
it's crazy it cool that is.
It's so good.
And all through the years, you can name all these fast Oakland receivers.
The 80s and Tim Brown and James Jett and those guys.
They've always tried to...
He covets speed and that sort of shit.
So this team here...
By the way, John Madden is the linebacker's coach on this team.
Not even a head coach yet.
Not even a head coach yet.
Just a fat kid.
Yeah, just a fat kid yeah just a fat
guy with bad hair that's it it's a lot of hair funny shirts yeah very funny shirts too tight
too just arms are too high too i don't know what's going on whoever cut his shirts for him is an
asshole they really are they didn't like him no they think it's hilarious to watch him on the
sidelines in that shit it's like in goodfellas when they're doing all the arrests kind of at the end and they arrest Tootie.
And he goes, whoever sold you them suits got a real fucking sense of humor on them.
To the FBI agents.
That's his comment.
Got a real fucking sense of humor on them.
Same thing.
Whoever's cutting John Madden's shirts is an asshole.
They don't like him and they think
it's hilarious they think and they're right they're absolutely correct the raiders in the
regular season go 13 and one this year oh my fucking crushing yeah and by how cool is that
too he gets to go to the bay area in 1967 shit yeah dude that's the summer so much fun yeah
that's literally summer of love is all that shit and oakland's right there
so i mean that had to be just to be in that environment at that time it was a very weird
and oakland was a completely different place like if you read hell's angels it's a you know that
shit might as well have been a thousand miles away from oakland but you could drive yeah you
know you got it uh they beat the houston oilers 40-7 in the championship game.
And they go all the way to the Super Bowl to lose to the Packers.
Okay.
33-14.
That's the Vince Lombardi Packers.
That was, yeah.
Super Bowl II, that was.
Who was the quarterback of that team?
Bart Starr.
Is it Bart Starr?
It's Bart Starr, baby.
Yeah, that's all.
Bart Starr.
That's still all the legends of the Packers.
That's that 60s Packers machine that was just crushing people, running them down.
That has Daryl LaMonica as the quarterback.
George Bland is still on the team as a backup quarterback.
He's like 50 years old.
Kind of a lot of some interesting names on here.
Fred Blitnikoff's on this team.
Billy Cannon.
There's some kind of legendary old guys here that you might have heard the names rattling around.
This year, he plays in all 14 games.
14-game season.
Yep.
He starts three, which for a guy who hadn't played in three years and was in the Army is a pretty good deal.
He starts any.
And was cut and got a phone call to be a part of this.
This is pretty interesting.
13 receptions, 3022 yards but six touchdowns
great and the big thing about him is the yards per reception which for a receiver is the big deal
because it's not only how if you're a deep threat but also yards after catches a big deal yeah but
that all counts in yards and yards per reception it's all in there uh his yards per reception this
year 23.2.
Unbelievable.
Which is a huge chunk of real estate.
It's a fourth of the goddamn field every time he touches the ball.
And that's pretty much the average he maintains his whole career.
Really?
When he retired, when he was done, he had the all-time lead of yards per reception.
Wow.
And he had it all the way up until the NFL changed the standard and you had to have more receptions than he had to qualify for that's fucked up which is stupid
yes otherwise he would have had still had that so uh they said that here's from the newspaper back
then this is 1967 in the newspaper uh wells's ability to shed past offenders is incredible
he would get open by such great margins it appeared as if someone had forgotten to cover him.
So he's getting yards after the catch, too.
And after the catch.
But he's apparently really great at getting open somehow,
because this is in the time of man-to-man coverage, too.
Not a lot of zone shit, not all this complicated shit.
You just line up.
And he was really good at moves, apparently.
He put all these different moves on people.
Shake people.
Shake and bake them up.
Get wide open. And then the first defender would touch him, and he'd all these different moves on people. Shake people. Shake and bake them up. Get wide open.
And then the first defender would touch him,
and he'd shed it and go on to the next one.
He'd go on because he's a bigger guy, too,
so he's not going to fall down if you touch him.
He's a badass.
So 1968 Oakland, they're 12-2.
Again, that's fucking, they're such a good team.
They've lost three games in two years.
Right?
And won 25.
Right.
That's awesome.
This is John Rausch again uh they win in
the divisional round of the playoffs here 41 to 6 they beat hank stram's chiefs who will be in the
super bowl the next year getting beat by the i'm sorry the cults do that not the chiefs but they
come back again and i think they win in 70 the chiefs i want to say it doesn't matter either way uh then they in 68 lose the championship game 27 23 very close
to joe namath and the jets who then goes on to guarantee victory and beat the cults and make
the afl and make a big legend but that four points away from not happening wow with the raiders here
so that's how razor thin that whole thing happened. This year, he makes the Pro Bowl.
Warren does, which is awesome.
He starts 12 games, 53 receptions for 1,137 yards.
Good Lord.
21 and a half yards per catch, 11 touchdowns, which leads the league.
And his long is 94.
He has a 94-yard touchdown.
He's a beast, man.
I've never heard of him.
That's what I'm saying. A lot of people haven't. a he's a beast man never heard of him he's a that's what
i'm saying a lot of people haven't and he's a fucking he's a beast out there um uh he said uh
the this is jim otto who's a hall of fame center for the raiders he said the one thing he could do
better than anybody we've ever had is find the end zone he said jerry rice would have never caught up
to him because the rate at which warren wells going, he would have been the greatest receiver ever.
So this, yeah, Giamatto, who played for, I don't know,
20 years or something, yeah, he says that
if Warren Wells played for 15 years like Jerry Rice
or longer, he'd have way better numbers than Jerry Rice,
which I don't know if that's true
because the number of passes that Jerry Rice caught
was ridiculous because of that West Coast offense
and all that shit.
So not sure.
So at this point, he is looking like he's literally on the cusp of being he could be the greatest receiver of all time.
Yeah.
Grace.
Wow.
That's going to be Grace.
I think.
Right.
Doesn't get much better than that.
No ring, right?
No ring yet.
No.
They've been to the Super Bowl once and lost and then lost in the championship game.
But they're right up there.
They've been to the Super Bowl once and lost and then lost in the championship game.
But they're right up there.
So we're going grace on that.
Because in early 1969, and we'll get into the details of this in a little bit, he ends up having to plead guilty to the attempted rape of a housewife.
What the?
Whose housewife?
Of an El Centro woman.
Not his housewife?
No, no, not his wife.
Some different lady. We'll have a little more on that in a minute. Why do we expand the charge to of his housewife no no not his wife some that's a different lady we'll have a little more on that in a minute why do we expand the charge to of a house of a house well that's
because it's 1969 we could just call it rape it makes it sound so much worse if you say of a house
that makes it sound like she was like washing the dishes and he just came up behind her and
flipped her dress up and started going down on her yeah that's what it makes and i think that's
what they're going for.
Makes it sound more menacing, doesn't it? It does, really.
You know, just a woman, you're like, what was she doing?
Where a housewife sounds like she was just innocently in her kitchen.
Yeah, she's baking a cake.
And he just came in and was like, I'll break some eggs for you.
And next thing you know, here it is.
I've been mixing a batch.
Get over here.
Yeah, I can mix that for you.
I got a spoon.
been mixing a batch get over here yeah i could mix that for you i got a spoon so he uh in the next year his life two years it really really falls apart with arrests and divorce and driving
drunk and court and jail and other stuff that i don't want to spoil a lady didn't stick with him
after the rape weird right yeah his wife of three and a half years yvonne ends up divorcing him in
19 says she stayed with him through this though yeah and then divorced him a little while later
once it died down so uh 1969 oakland raiders though they don't give a shit about that we
rape all you want this is the raiders it's our kind of guy do they care yeah that goes with
everybody back then lance rentzel was considered just a hell of a guy back then it was like he
showed his dick to multiple kids and they were like ah he's just a silly guy like they didn't take shit seriously we are the raiders
that's what we do there's a pillaging skull on our on our hat with you know crossbones we got
rid of the bones because they're not scary enough we put fucking swords swords and an eye patch
on a skeleton it's already got no eyes but who cares we're gonna make sure we want it scarier
on a skeleton it's already got no eyes but who cares we're gonna make sure we want it scarier it's interesting so 1969 they go this by the way john roush who was 25 and three yeah in the last
two years gets fired what because he didn't make it to the super bowl he lost to the jets in the
championship holy shit and al davis was pissed that he lost the super bowl then lost that
championship game couldn't get over the hump shit Shit canned him. Wow. Which is, that's got to be the most head-shaking firing of all time.
Like, if the next guy he hired wasn't the next guy he hired, it would have been, Al
Davis would have looked like the biggest idiot in the world.
Yeah, John Madden.
He hired John Madden, who turned into John Madden.
Who's fucking John Madden.
So, yeah.
He has a fucking video game named after him.
For 30 years.
Where you can try to be a genius with football. Like, you know, John Madden. He has a fucking video game named after him. For 30 years. Where you can try to be a genius with football.
Like, you know, John Madden.
Yeah, because he brought the Raiders to this glory.
But this whole thing, imagine John Rausch.
Imagine you're like, I've been 25-3 over the last two years.
They're crushing wins in the playoffs and all this sort of thing.
And they're like, yeah, you're fine.
Sorry.
I'm going to take a chance on that linebacker coach yeah you know that one guy that you yeah you probably don't
even know his name but he's gonna replace you for some reason so this year under john madden they go
12-1-1 okay fantastic still they don't stop the divisional round of the playoffs they beat the
houston oilers 56-7 my god that is an ass that's an absolute star wow they were washing the
dishes and got their skirt flipped up that is just a my god anytime there's ravaged a 50 something
it hurts seven yeah you don't even have double digits it's like the broncos lost
to the niners 55 10 yeah it's so brutal to see that number. That was a tough one. 50 points is so hard to score in football.
You really got to.
It's just watching them score all fucking day long.
Defense, on offense, a punt return.
All day.
Jesus Christ.
Then they go to the championship game, the AFL championship game against the Kansas City Chiefs,
and they lose to the Chiefs that year, 17-7.
So there you go.
Same exact result as John Raoush so I mean there
was really no point in firing him but that's okay October 31st 69 though in the middle of the season
yeah fucking dead center of the season here on Halloween he's in court uh Warren is for his
rape attempt here um he is going to uh well he ends up pleading guilty to attempted rape. The charge is brought by the wife of an Oakland nightclub owner.
Yuck.
She accused him of attempting to rape her in his car on April 19th.
Now, by the way, in his car, just remember that,
because that comes up later multiple times where he says it's not true,
but you're like, all this stuff, it's always the same place.
His M.O. is in his car to do things, which is weird. Maybe. where he says it's not true, but you're like, all this stuff is always, it's always the same place. Everybody,
it's his MO is in his car to do things,
which is weird.
Maybe.
So she accused him
of attempting to rape her.
She said they had met
that evening at a party
following a fashion show
in which he modeled men's clothes.
Okay.
He's a local celebrity.
The judge here
ends up taking his plea
and places him,
you, sir,
may fuck off.
It is three years probation.
Oh, my.
For an attempted rape.
Way to take that serious.
And a $2,000 fine.
Okay.
So that's that.
He suspended a one to 20 year prison sentence, which is what he had the discrepancy to give him.
You fuck up in the next three years and we can give you that.
Yeah, that's the thing. And he orders
Warren to abstain
from liquor because he was
drinking at the time. That always seems to be his problem.
Stay out of bars or
establishments serving drinks
and not to contact the
woman or her husband
while he was on probation, which
makes perfect
sense.
You should probably never try to contact someone who tried to rape.
Probably ever again.
Ever again.
That should probably be the end of that relationship.
One would imagine.
I think she'd probably prefer it that way.
Yeah.
The judge also required him to undergo any psychiatric treatment thought necessary by
probation officers.
And he recommended this is what this makes no sense.
Like you can.
The rest is all
like legal things and then he recommends you should go back to college to get the three units
you need for your degree also like thanks dad that degree is in elementary school teaching how
about we don't yeah how about we yeah he just pleaded guilty to attempted rape let's not tell
him go to college so you can go be around kids?
We feel like children would be a good place for you to...
Jesus, fuck.
Wow, a sex pervert.
We put that guy around kids.
We're going to put him in there, I think.
Wow.
Only if he works at your kid's school, Judge.
Yeah, he can fucking teach your kid's third grade class and see what happens.
So December 16th, 1969, 1969 he is it's weird he
says he's too he's too hurt to play uh there's a big article about he's he got hurt in the third
quarter and he's not really he's emotionally physically he's just uh he had a tough night
yeah didn't sleep very well very sad it's very sad a bad dream he's got a lot of stuff going on
uh he says that uh he's hurt and they say that he uh He's got a lot of stuff going on. He says that he's hurt, and they say that he's got a shoulder injury, like a separation of his shoulder.
And they said at first they thought he was going to need surgery, but then they said they were going to just keep an eye on it.
And a Raiders spokesman says, obviously, they don't want to cut the kid up if they don't have to, which means surgery.
Cut the kid up sounds way worse.
Crazy way to describe that. Jesus Christ. I don't have to which means surgery cut the kid up sounds way worse crazy way to
describe that jesus christ i don't want any surgery now uh he won't play against houston
but that's all we know for sure but he did play against houston because he started all 14 games
that year so i don't know how the fuck that oh that might be the playoff game they blew him out
in oh that's what that is okay because it's late de. That's right. He didn't play in the playoffs, got it. No. So he started all 14 games that year, 47 receptions, 1,260 yards leading the league, yards per reception,
again leading the league, 26.8.
Jesus.
Holy shit.
He did that while he was hurt?
Do you understand?
No, he got hurt at the end of the last game.
That's unbelievable.
That is obscene.
That's more than a quarter of the field every the end of the last game. That's unbelievable. That is obscene.
That's more than a quarter of the field every time you touch the fucking ball.
Unbelievable.
That is wild.
You just throw to him all four fucking times,
and you're probably going to end up getting a first down eventually.
So unbelievable, man.
14 touchdowns leading the league.
That's wild. And averages 90 yards per game, which is also leading the league.
In 14 games he
got 14 touchdowns yeah people don't do that in 16 now it's impressive that's those are big time
stats and you can't touch the quarterback no and this guy's still pulling it off it's fucking
crazy but he does not get he doesn't make the pro bowl this year i wonder if it's because of the
rape thing maybe that could be i'm not sure it's hard to say this is when his wife divorces him
though at the end of 69 which makes sense because that's when the whole rape thing happened so she i think right
after he pleads guilty she's probably like all right i'm out never mind in the summer of 69
summer of 69 sing it don henley sing it i think it's brian adams but yes it's brian adams no it's
not so you're right you're right that's brian adams I thought it was Don Henley's solo shit. No, no. It's awful. I mean, it's lame like that, but yeah.
Just as lame.
A lot of people love all the Eagles solo shit.
Awful.
I hate it all.
Well, you know, I can deal with the guitarist.
I forget his name.
God damn it.
That's the one I hate the most.
Really?
Joe Walsh.
I hate Joe Walsh.
I love that fucking raspy, weird voice.
I like it.
I just don't like his shit.
I think it's that one song I don't like.
Life's Been Good to Me So Far.
Yeah, it ruins it for everything.
I love that one.
That's one of my favorites.
Really annoying.
They're all just douchey.
I like him more because Don Henley hates him so much.
And that, for me, is enough.
That if somebody hates you that much and Don Henley's a lame douche.
Can we hate them both, John?
That tells me that Joe's cool as shit. What if they're both're both douchebags that's possible a douche fight is the worst yeah
that's what i'm saying what if they're just both douchebags it's possible what if it's like
i don't want it i was gonna make a comedian analogy but i'm not gonna even bother two
douches fighting two douches fighting there's a lot of those out there for comedians so i'm not even gonna get into
it so yeah he's divorced now anyway his wife is done with him fair enough yeah i mean i don't know
how many wives stick around after you fucking plead guilty to attempted rape and i'm sure i'm
sure there was some like stipulations after the court case where that he had to like i mean if
she if it's not worth putting if he's still an asshole at home how
many times can you say you fucking raped somebody can't you just be nice to me yeah jesus i forgave
you for right for rape but eventually women are not gonna how could you i couldn't put up with
somebody that raped no that's gotta be a very straight well i'd be very i'd be curious of how
they did first of all and i'd be force a man like whoa you're to be hard wow how they did it first of all, and I'd be like, whoa, you're hard.
Wow.
How'd you pull that off?
That's impressive.
So 1970 Oakland, they go eight, four and two this year.
Okay.
So not quite as great under John Madden.
21.
They go to the playoffs.
First round, they beat Miami.
This is before Miami becomes a little mini dynasty for a couple of years.
21-14.
And then they lose in the conference championship to the Colts, 27-17.
I think the Cowboys beat the Colts that year.
Or did the Colts?
No, the Colts won the Super Bowl that year on a last-second field goal, I think, against the Cowboys, if I'm not mistaken.
I don't know.
I think it's Super Bowl V.
I don't know early Super Bowl wins.
I used to watch when I was a kid those ESn remember they used to have yeah they show the whole fucking
game it was it was like a 30 minute breakdown and it would be the super bowl 12 okay the doomsday
defense of the dallas cowboys i'd watch that every time it was on the nfl films music and shit
so like stepfather bought the VHS.
Oh my God.
They were on constantly.
You don't need to.
They're on every day.
I've got them every day after school.
You come home and have like AWA wrestling and then there'd be like, you know, the fucking
74 Cowboys or something.
It was fun.
I own it.
Nice.
Solid stuff here.
I still haven't watched it all.
No.
Cause I'm like, I don't know these guys i
memorized like the whole fight i didn't know i mean i was a little but i memorized like all the
early shit because i'm insane so uh then they lose the conference championship like i said to
the cults but he has a very exciting end to the last game of the season against the jets he catches
the game-winning catch after dropping five balls oh Oh, wow. Fucking in a game, which is...
He dropped five and they still went back to him.
He dropped, yeah, that's what it is.
After the game, he got the game ball,
and they said Jim Otto flipped him the game ball,
and he dropped it.
Even in the locker room.
He just, he had a bad day.
Literally dropped the ball.
He flipped it to him from eight feet away.
He missed it.
Here you go, great receiver. Probably the easiest ball you're gonna catch all day and he dropped he described it as
the worst performance he can remember as a pro collegian or high schooler he dropped two passes
wide open with no one anywhere near him and uh one bounced on his fingertips and he off his
fingertips and he fucked that one up.
That would have been a touchdown.
But one pass, with one second left on the clock, he caught a 33-yard touchdown pass,
giving the Raiders a 14-13 win over the Jets.
Wow.
So it was a big, giant fucking thing.
But if he had caught those five balls all day, they wouldn't have needed that fucking thing.
Exactly.
He would have had three touchdowns.
He said, I was disgusted with myself in the first half.
I missed three or four passes.
The weather had nothing to do with it.
I was just missing them.
This is the worst day I've ever had.
Worse than pleading guilty to rape?
Right.
Attempted rape?
Probably not.
How about the time that you raped a woman?
I think the attempted rape
is always going to be worse, probably.
Jesus, man.
He scored the only touchdowns
the Raiders had that day first one was
a 13 yard pass from a 43 year old george blanda at that point holy which george blanda they there
was a like a meme going around of tom brady 43 and george blanda 43 george blanda looks 72 because
you know and internally wailed yeah he's like a he had a quite different life than tom
brady though you know i don't think he's got a model rubbing lotion on him every night probably
so there's nobody moisturizing him no no definitely not so uh he said wells had told
the monica before the play just throw the ball out there i'll try to catch the ball if i can't
i'll try to get an interference call and he ended ended up catching it. And there you go. He says later on, back in 20, 30 years from then, he says it's one of the best memories of his life.
He says, against New York, I caught one with about two minutes left in the game.
It was actually one second.
How do you not know that?
Well, why would you make it less good to you?
Right.
You would think he got last second and it was actually two minutes left.
No, it was so much more dramatic than that.
So much more.
Inside the two-minute warning.
Literally a fucking second, man.
You missed it.
The game's over.
That's how it works, and you lose.
He said, early Thomas deflected it.
I'll never forget it.
Early Thomas, he was a cornerback.
I assume so.
I hope he wasn't like a fan who came in and deflected it.
He tipped the ball and deflected it.
God damn it, Early. Get back to your seat. Get your shit came in and deflected it. He tipped the ball and deflected it. God damn it, Early.
Get back to your seat.
Get your shit together.
Come on, Early.
He always does that every time.
I don't know why we keep selling him tickets so close to the field.
It makes no sense.
He said he tipped the ball and it was deflected off my hands.
I kept my eyes on the ball all the way in.
I wasn't fast at all, but I was quick.
I'd get the jump on the defensive back, and that way I could maneuver on him either way.
But if I didn't have the routes, the manipulation to get behind him, I'd be kind of dead because I was dead with speed.
But the moves, he couldn't stop me.
He wasn't a straightaway.
He wasn't like a 4-2-40 guy.
He wasn't a guy who'd blow you away like that.
He'd literally blow you away by tricking you with moves, which you could get away with in a man-to-man scheme because there's only one guy covering you
but if if you trick him if the safety is then right behind him to cover you that's a different
game at that point you know if he's if you're in his own or something he lets you go because
you're beyond that yardage yeah it's my time to cover the fucking i gotta get the flat now for
the running back and he's got that yeah that didn't exist back then um he said that he was always prepared to play he said quote i felt relaxed in every game i went in it was just
like a i was just like a spirit out there everything was clear the hell are you talking
about sometimes his things have i was like this you're like were you your similes are fucked
mister spirit i was like a spirit out there says that
everything was clear is that what spirits are it's all clear to them yes i don't know i didn't use drugs or anything like that i just had god's prayers with me and the whole team just the rest
of the fellas we were one unit uh when they called on me i was ready to fly yeah which is the most
old school district description of sports you'll ever hear in your life was that right there just
mean god's prayers in the fellows.
Everybody is.
We all pray to God, but God prays to him.
Is that what he said?
He said, I just had God.
Yes.
His prayers to God.
God prays for me.
God prays for me, obviously.
And to me and to me.
You never know.
Also, in December 1970, and this is quite the run he has coming up here.
He is involved in a hit and run accident
and just takes off and his probation is revoked,
but later restored after he undergoes a diagnostic study
at the Santa Rita Rehabilitation Center.
They pull him out and they let him go back.
So, okay.
Now, 1970, he starts 13 out of 14 games plays in all 14 43 catches 935 yards 11 touchdowns
21.7 yards per catch yeah makes the pro bowl doing great he's doing fucking fantastic he really is
he's got 42 touchdowns and basically in four years of playing which is unbelievable fantastic
these are huge numbers fucking enormous numbers He's averaging 23.1 yards.
That's including his rookie season with the two catches.
So, I mean, 23.1 a catch.
He's blowing it away.
Another record he sets, though, that could almost be a record,
but the real record he sets is on February 1, 1971.
Oh, boy.
He has a record-setting off-field performance.
Oh, boy.
Record-setting, it's it's impressive
two rapes you know what no but it's almost as impressive it's a crime in sports first jimmy
we've every once in a while every what like 40 50 episodes we're like that's never happened before
crime in sports first because we've covered so much pretty much everything you name the crazy
shit crime it's happened sure uh to steal your your
estranged daughter so you can fuck her for years it's happened it's happened
it's actually happened on our show like has it happened just to once i think it might have
happened sort of twice one and a half times buck zoom Zumhoff, for sure, and it happened one other time. So at this point,
he sets a record for drunk driving,
I'm going to say here.
Now, first of all,
in the afternoon,
it comes out that he is jailed on drunk driving charges on February 1st
after a high-speed chase with police
on the freeway,
which also is never good.
He's released without bail
with a promise to appear on February 8th.
He has another court date for his hit and run and all that sort of shit.
He was arrested after the Pro Bowl in the locker room, by the way.
He's arrested in the Pro Bowl locker room in Los Angeles on a $1,000 bond of a warrant
charging violation of probation of his attempted rape.
So that's for the hit
and run um so conditions of his probation are that he not drink and that he avoid places where
liquor served blah blah blah we told you all that yeah now let's that's the afternoon what happened
in the whole day well let's see here the paper says this is fucking amazing new achievement colon
two drunk driving arrests within less than 24 hours.
Oh, boy.
One in San Francisco, the other in Oakland.
He crossed the bridge and did it again.
That's why they didn't know he had it, and they released him ROR, even though he was the second of the day.
Oh, dear Christ.
He was picked up on the Bay Bridge at dawn, where a highway patrol observed his 1970 Cadillac.
Very nice.
Brand new.
Speeding and weaving from lane to lane.
On the bridge.
On the bridge.
Good Lord.
Dude, keep it together on the bridge.
You're going to fall in the fucking bay for fuck's sake.
What are you doing?
The one place for sure you've got to keep it between the lines.
I mean, 10 and 2.
The lines are guardrails, sir.
10 and 2.
Put some Marvin Gaye on. Open both windows and get the cool air flowing. Let's do this. Barely blink. you've got to keep it between the lines i mean 10 and 2 guardrails 10 and 2 put some marvin gay
on open both windows and get the cool air flowing let's do this barely blink holy shit count to 20
blink a lot yeah um he forced him to the curb and gave him a roadside uh test to which he uh
flunked terribly yeah so they booked him in san francisco city jail for speeding and drunk driving
they release him yeah he's bailed out uh just just after that basically uh and returned to oakland
and there at 2 30 a.m on the freeway he there's a 90 mile an hour high speed chase through all
this shit and he again is shit-faced damn so literally got out, got drunk again, and then got pulled over like right in a row.
I was drunk.
That's your first day.
Drunk.
Pull over.
Yeah.
Not good.
Yeah.
So he his attorney appeared to he basically said that he's like, hey, give the guy a break.
Obviously, he had a bad day.
That was his.
I don't know what else to say here.
had a bad day that was his like i don't know what else to say here it also comes up that recently he was uh picked up by police and taken out of an oakland bar and held as a drunk just held as
like a drunken vagrant in the in the in jail and released without being charged so that didn't
violate his probation he's not supposed to be drinking at all not at all he's not supposed to
be in bars no and he's had three now-related police incidents in a matter of a month and a half.
Holy shit.
It's not good.
April 2nd, 1971, he's fined for drunk driving here.
He's fined $125.
Wow.
Don't do that.
That's what the punishment used to be?
Don't do that, sir.
A couple of 30-packs?
That's it.
They dismissed the charge of speeding yeah that's
generous yeah especially if you're speeding while running from a cop because you're drunk they
already took money from him for the for the tui that's true how do you punish further you're right
we've already broken his spirit with the 125 fine we shouldn't make him sad that's one thing we
shouldn't do so uh at this point he's's at the Santa Rita Rehabilitation Center undergoing more psychiatric evaluation.
Back to rehab.
He's sent to the institution there February 17th, and he's got all sorts of hearings.
So that's April 71.
May 1971.
He's in a bar in Beaumont, Texas, which he's not supposed to be.
Although it's that far from California.
How are they going to know?
That's what I mean.
It's all the way in Texas.
He's with his brother there hanging out.
And he's stabbed by a woman.
Oh.
Right in the heart.
Perhaps by a housewife.
Right in the chest.
Really?
He's stabbed by a woman in the bar.
Oh, my God.
Okay.
What kind of behavior was he exhibiting?
In public. Yeah. All right. Well well that depends on who you ask it depends on if you ask her or if you
ask him if you ask him it sounds like a really strange situation because basically he says
a woman i've never seen before in my life came up to me and asked what would you do if i stabbed you
and i said i don't know what you're talking about. And then she stabbed me, which is a weird story.
Her story makes more sense, but it might not be true.
She could be a complete lunatic.
Who knows?
So we'll get into it.
We'll hear both stories here.
So he was stabbed by a woman after he attended an appreciation dinner for several Beaumont
area football players.
This was, I believe, the key to the city.
So he got the key to the city and
then a knife to the city from the city all in one day. That's wild to get the key to the city and
then be stabbed by a resident in the same day. It's pretty fucking impressive. We all love you,
except her. Yeah, that's almost as good as getting pulled over twice. The whole town
certainly trusts you. We're going to give you a key to everything, except her. She's not so sure
about it, though. She's got a few more questions she'd like to ask there was one dissenting vote
we'd like to show you her here put that down sweetheart so he does goes there uh he's they're
trying to determine if he suffered heart damage because he was stabbed right by the heart basically
and it went into him he was seated at a table at the tahiti club oh baby that
was a big thing like in the late 60s early 70s remember like island in goodfellas they had that
that the bamboo lounge that was a big thing with palm tree leaves bamboo and tiki and
fucking flammable shit yeah yeah those little those little umbrellas and drinks and fruit and
shit we're gonna pretend we're on the beach in fucking Newark.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This is great.
Queens.
So he's seated with his brother, Russell, and a man named Nathaniel Eldridge.
A 20-year-old woman asked them, apparently, this is walked up to the table, and asked
Wells what he would do if she stabbed him.
And he said that he said nothing.
So she pulled a dagger
from her stocking and plunged it into his chest from her okay yeah like she keeps that on her leg
that's a whips it out like that's a badass woman right there sounds to me more like if he said
what would you do if i fucked you and she's like what'd you do if i'd stab you and he's like nothing
she's like all right good check this out yeah now wells this is the funny part too he told police that he didn't want to press any charges against her and he'd never seen her before
she obviously is just this poor crazy deranged woman who had some weird thought and i i you know
what um let's just let the whole thing drop or she's just a chick that's tired of dudes
threatening to fuck her that's yeah you never know he he describes it as an unprovoked attack
uh it took place like i said in this nightclub he was listed in critical condition at first
critical condition till they determined there was no damage to his heart and it was just flesh
wound basically uh so he was he said that they called him on the phone the press and he said he
was reluctant to discuss the future but he is willing to talk about the past which is the
weirdest everyone says the exact opposite how many people, but he is willing to talk about the past, which is the weirdest.
Everyone says the exact opposite.
How many people go, I don't want to talk about the past.
I'm only here to talk about the future.
Well, that's the standard answer for every person who's ever been in trouble or anything.
He goes, let's talk about all my fuck ups.
The future is unlimited.
It could be great.
You could say anything and it could be the future.
Yeah.
So, yeah. Or it's foreshadowing.
He knows it's about to get
way worse than whatever he's done that's yeah well we'll find out what the what the point is here so
al davis they ask al davis about it what about football and he says quote the most important
thing is that warren recovers fully from this and that he gets his life back on the right track
which that's fair i guess from al davis um so he says warren's just he doesn't he's
a big hands up to the side he has no idea what's going on yeah he says quote all these things have
happened to me over the past two years that bother me he said but you know i don't feel i was wrong
in every instance i know it sounds like i'm copping a plea but sometimes i was just a victim
of circumstances sometimes i just don't know how or why things happen yeah i'm just very confused it's the guy that's had too much police
interaction you ever said it sounds like i'm copping a plea yeah i know it sounds like i'm
copping a plea just uses that as a euphemism and regular times have you been in a court yeah wow
you've got a lot of charges you've copped a lot of pleas haven't you so he didn't want to talk
about the stabbing he's like look that's just a poor woman now his brother russell he's got a lot of charges. You've copped a lot of police, haven't you? So he didn't want to talk about the stabbing.
He's like, look, that's just a poor woman.
Now, his brother, Russell, he's got a different story for the police.
Warren's like, I never saw her before.
His brother told police that Warren did know the girl and had argued with her two weeks before the incident.
So this wasn't some stranger walks up and some deranged stranger.
Yeah, he's got a lot of fucking problems here.
So he's had all these drunken drivings.
He did all this shit.
Al Davis said, quote, Warren is basically a good person.
Basically.
Some of the things he's done are not to be excused, but they should be understood.
There ought to be some compassion.
His upbringing down there in Texas was tough as hell.
If the newspapers are going to print stories about Wells's background, they should try to understand where he's from.
That's also true.
But that ends at rape.
Yeah.
Or attempted rape.
That ends at a few different very serious charges.
I get drunk driving.
I get fucking around.
I get a lot of things.
But no matter what your background, rape is inexcusable.
I don't care what your background is unless you were brought up at the number one rape college in the world and they told you that that's all you should be doing and it's a weird school to go to
but so he says also al davis that he doesn't he just hopes that his latest misfortune won't be
blown out of proportion in the papers he said this is a shame a real shame al davis said and
then they said well it hurt his career as a raider. And he goes, it helps. Getting stabbed?
Are you kidding me?
Rape and stabbing?
It's a pirate.
What does he do?
It's kind of what raiders do.
Yeah.
He said, no, it won't hurt his career so far as the raiders are concerned.
The raiders don't operate according to public pressures.
Besides, I think most people will understand.
We hope Warren gets well first, and then we hope he comes back.
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Now, more on the stabbing.
Let's get back to that.
All right.
So detectives said that warren
and his brother were just just hanging out nothing happened and what would you do blah blah blah
russell is she apparently russell says she said what would you do to me if i cut somebody
which is a weird question to ask so russell said he was so startled he didn't reply and then the
woman suddenly pulled a dagger out and out of her stocking and stabbed his brother.
He told police that his brother and the woman, like I said, met about two weeks ago.
Warren Wells said the doctors told him he'll be all right.
But he declined to comment on it, calling it, quote, another case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Oh, yeah.
Now, her story is a different story her name is jeanette landry
she's 20 years old of beaumont texas she says that she stabbed wells in retaliation for a beating he
gave her two weeks before in his car because he was trying to uh he was trying to force her into
prostitution yeah and she didn't want to do it so he was beating her
wow and that's why she came back and stabbed him today as retaliation for
beating her and trying to force her into prostitution in his car
um those are very different stories they start out with i've never seen her before
turns out she's not says she's not only knows you, but you beat her in very close quarters from driver to passenger, just want womped on her and tried to get her to suck dick for
money to give to you.
So, you know what I mean?
This is a very messy.
That's a lot.
It's a lot.
It's very fucking messy, but he does not want to press charges.
Was he trying to pimp her out or was he trying to fuck her for cash?
No, he wanted her to, he was trying to turn her out.
Wow.
He wanted her.
He was trying to force her into making him money. He was to pimp her that's what he said that's what she
says yeah um so that's that's a fucking mess i mean we don't know if that's true or not yeah but
the brother did say they got in an argument two weeks before that he told the cops that that lines
up with two weeks before that he beat her up in the car serious allegation who knows either way
he doesn't want to press charges i think and he at first he just said i never saw her before probably a you know crazy person let's
not look into it anymore yeah you know what i mean that's the fact that he said i never saw her
before makes me think that he was probably doing up to something nefarious with her yeah and and
with her her story being that much it lends more to she has a little bit of credibility.
That's what I mean.
She tested and she goes to court and testifies under oath and everything, man.
So, I mean, once somebody is doing that, it's not just a story here.
It's something to be.
I mean, you don't have to people lie in court, but they're less likely to lie in court than they are just on the street.
If a cop asked him a question, once they get under oath, it all feels very hard to argue.
Yeah.
A lot of times they won't show up in terms of that.
So September 1971, if they're lying and someone's lying, they don't want to go to court and
say it in court and then be charged with perjury for it, too.
So September 71, he's in court.
And this is pushing up against the football season.
So this is a this is a problem here.
And this woman, Landry, she testifies at the hearing that Wells tried to force her to become
a prostitute and then beat her when she didn't
want to. Wells said
he's just in the wrong place at the wrong time
and he testified too
and he said that now he knows
her by the way in court now he knows who she is
he said that she attacked
him because two weeks
earlier he had refused to
ask her out on a date
ask her out on a date Jimmy refused to ask her out on a date ask her out on a date jimmy refused to ask i
wanted to go to the sadie hawkins dance with him and he wouldn't take me so i stabbed him
a date yeah she's so so scorned and spurned by rejection of a date and what year is this
stabbed him 1970 30 year old man yeah and basically 20 and yeah she's begging him yeah okay and so she
stabbed him because of that the date's probably in there somewhere but he was probably saying go
out and get a date right and then get paid for it bring me the money so uh this is all very very bad
and ugly and this is not a this isn't a good look for the league no this isn't a good look for the league. No, this isn't a good look for anything here. So the judge in court tells him, quote, you have run out of chances as he's been fucking up a lot.
He's on probation the entire time he's doing this.
They sentence him to you, sir.
They fuck off 90 days in prison here.
They sentence him to 90 days for diagnostic study at a medical facility they want
to study this guy like he's a fucking science experiment what makes you go man what's what's
wrong with him here uh this whole thing the the wells was turned over to the custody of the sheriff
at this point he had asked the judge quote for a break he said can you give me a break on this and
he went no he said this is great this is the same judge as before he said can you give me a break on this and he went no he said
this is great this is the same judge as before he said quote you had every chance you have just run
out of chances and which i mean yeah he's done a lot he's just being in that bar violates his
probation right so that's several charges ago rape was on here no yeah no sorry i mean it's over
yeah one of the witnesses here um by the way she says
it was a switchblade knife from her purse not a dagger from her stocking as well so things get
mixed up in the which one's more menacing probably the switchblade out of the first i think so yeah
although a dagger that noise that noise yeah that clocking horrifying it's a good click there
so um yeah she testified like i said retaliation
for a beating and all this sort of shit so um he is going to be going to prison for 90 days here
uh his attorney expressed keen disappointment over the ruling saying he has no method for appeal
and estimated that prison diagnostic studies are usually 120 days which means wells will be gone
for the whole football season.
No football in 71.
Maybe don't go into bars and get stabbed by checks.
That's the thing.
You shouldn't be in a bar.
Wrong place, the wrong time.
If you weren't in a bar, none of that exists.
That's the thing.
Wrong place, wrong time.
Correct.
Wrong place, bar, wrong time.
You're on probation.
You're on fucking probation.
Get out.
So October of 71, he's in vacaville at this point
hell yeah not good the jail he's uh prison by the way i love how in multiple articles they always
say what his prison number is anytime an athlete's in prison they like to say he's no longer number
83 on the field now he's number blah blah blah blah blah they six digits long love doing that
shit in every article it's the worst trope stop doing that
shit so uh traded in this number for this number so he's there he says quote he's in jail he says
first time for me in a place like this i'm seeing what it's like from the inside it's different all
right yeah then different being on the raiders probably that's the idea actually the raiders
locker room is pretty similar probably to county jail county jail or Boccavilla.
Yeah, same type of thing.
Same amount of danger.
Yeah.
Here's right out of this whole thing.
Murray Olderman is the 1971 hacky guy who wrote this.
Yeah.
Quote, Warren Wells is right now a number, B367472, in the files of the California prison system.
Yeah. six seven four seven two in the files of the california prison system yeah you approach him
through the high wire fences barbed on top with three armed guard towers spaced the length of a
stockade it's called euphemistically the california medical facility it's fucking jail you just
described jail if you said went to see him in jail i'd go barbed wire razors on the top from
towers towers guys with guns that's what jail looks like
what are we talking about here like a stockade that sounds right he goes on he really this guy
really wants he's like i'm gonna write my novel after he got done with this he's like it's time
you know what listen an electronically controlled gate clanks open leading to a main foyer where
sergeant jay gardner on duty checks your id summons prisoner, and then a guard unlocks a door to a visiting room.
There, behind impersonal, cold, bulletproof glass,
sits Warren Wells.
Yeah.
In a slouch, fingering a cigarette,
which always sounds gross.
Don't say that.
Don't say the word fingering unless you mean it.
Put it that way.
You know?
This is for the gusto.
A phone in front of him. on your side of the glass there's
a phone too pink it's a hell of a way a hell of a way to communicate face to face is it this guy
has a novel cooking he's like chevy chase and funny farm you know he's like it's about five
buddies knocking over a casino poker buddies yeah you don't find that funny the perfect crime
you're not laughing.
Was that part funny?
On the first page, there's like eight laughs.
There's like eight laughs.
Like right here.
Oh, I love that so much.
Oh, fuck.
So they ask him, how do you feel about this?
And he said, quote, I don't feel embarrassed.
Well, you should.
You should be literally catching touchdown passes.
And instead, you're sitting in jail.
I can't hear your voice except for through this pink phone.
Be embarrassed about this.
Yeah.
I just do my time.
I've been here since September the 8th.
And yeah, he acts a little weird.
And he says, quote, I think it stems from the rape incident and the alcohol.
You think?
Yeah.
No, you got it.
It stems from the three years of probation
you were put on for attempted rape and then the alcohol which you were literally fucking
adjudicated not to have right like i don't know what more you need to to really who's that guy
sitting next to you this is my cellmate his name's cigarette why are you fingering why are you
fingering cigarette oh god he smells like stale smoke i don't like so he he's got his family his lawyer um he says that
his lawyer says that he's an introverted man who's transformed by drink everybody says he gets the
the second the booze touches his lips he's a different human being and he turns into a
fucking animal he turns into a monster around his family and starts terrorizing people yeah
like the second booze touches his lips so he just can't some people can't handle booze it's true
it's just a thing that happens and transformed by drink transformed by drink and that's his lawyer
after he's already in jail so this is like you know after the fact this isn't even like telling
a judge that yeah he says uh you know he's picked up for all this stuff he says i heard them say
it's the alcohol this is warren i, I heard them say it's the alcohol.
This is Warren.
I've heard them say that it's the alcohol that I just can't handle it.
But I don't think so.
I just got I think I just got in trouble for drinking and doing dumb shit while you're drinking.
I don't think I did anything wrong this time to be in here.
You you got to ask Judge Deaton on that.
I'm walking a tightrope.
I've got to be very careful what I do.
Sure, I'm worried.
I'd like to get back to my job and all that money. Yeah. So, yeah, he wants to obviously do that. I'm walking a tightrope. I've got to be very careful what I do. Sure, I'm worried. I'd like to get back to my job and all that money. So yeah, he wants
to obviously do that.
He, basically
they say that he might have his
term in Vacaville cut short. He
may get out within 30 days, his lawyer said.
He's very hopeful. And
he said that,
they said it's all up to the judge. And
meanwhile, all he can do is hang out in the prison gym five days a week where he's an assistant coach on the basketball team.
And, yeah, he said his team just lost by 10.
He's upset about that.
Yeah.
He said, though, he said that he could he said that he could do well.
They said, you know, anybody can replace you on the Raiders.
And he said, the guys in my the guys in my place, they know the job.
They'll be fine, I guess.
He's been eating starchy meals.
He said, quote, they could be better, but I'm a quiet guy.
I believe the less you say, the better you be.
Okay.
I mean, that's go along and get along, I guess.
He says that there's no stigma attached to being a convict.
He doesn't think it's going to affect him.
He thinks he'll be fine.
He says, quote, time is valuable, but I got plenty here.
What can I do?
I can't break out.
That would be foolish.
I've talked to other inmates.
They say this isn't one of the bad places like San Quentin.
This is a touch.
Vacaville?
Man, that's where Manson's at.
What are you talking about?
It's not as bad as San Quentin, apparently.
I suppose.
Probably in terms of conditions.
Yeah.
Every prison's different, too, in their rules, especially back then, because reading the
Manson books, he'd go to this prison, and the rules were totally different.
Then he'd go here, and he wasn't allowed to have his guitar, and he couldn't do this,
and he couldn't do that.
And so they might have easier visiting hours.
They might have uh easier visiting hours they might have better
something like the things that a prisoner will say is better is based on their comfort of life
not what you would imagine it would be preferences that we want yeah we'd imagine just that's the
least amount of rape probably is better right that's the best present least amount of rape
and stabbing that's the best one whereas they look at it differently least amount of rape and
stabbing and then ease of my anybody that wants to see me you know what ibing, that's the best one, whereas they look at it differently. Least amount of rape and stabbing and then ease of anybody that wants to see me.
You know what I mean?
If that's easy and I don't get fucked or stabbed, I could do that.
This is terrific.
Yeah, who cares at that point?
So anyway, they said across, this is in the paper here, across the room, past panels of
glass, an attractive woman visiting another inmate motions eagerly toward Warren.
His back is turned
you point her out to him she waves he shrugs she knows who he is quote i'm an oakland raiders fan
she smiles oh boy so he's got ladies coming to the prison that like him and all sorts of shit
like that and like the raiders yeah so he wants to come back though he says i love the raiders
my coming back this year depends on a couple of things, but I can't comment on that now. He says, you never know. I guess I could go back to practice in July and
hurt my knee or something, and that would just end my career right there. So he's like, who the
fuck knows? Nothing's guaranteed anyway. I'm not going to sit here and tell you what's going to
happen. He said, I'm tired of messing up. Someday I'd like to finish up college and get my degree.
I think i leave
california and come back to texas and work with underprivileged kids right now i just don't know
i don't know you can't do that don't do any of that just figure something out i don't fucking
know what to do with this guy he's a drunk rapist doesn't get to work with kids no that's the thing
he's sitting in vacaville and he's having a hard time there i'm sure i'm sure that sucks but you
you're on probation for attempted rape. This isn't something mild.
It's not drugs.
If it was drugs, I'd go, hey, you know what?
I don't fucking care that you have drugs.
It doesn't bother me very much.
But attempted rape, that bothers me.
It's dead ass serious.
I like attempted rape.
So he's sitting there.
He doesn't realize how fucked up his life is.
That's the thing.
I feel like he's not getting it.
You know what I'm saying?
Obviously.
He's like, I don't know.
I just like to do that.
Maybe I'll be fine. Maybe I'll do this. Wrong place, wrong time. Obviously. He's like, I don't know. I just like to do that. Maybe I'll be fine.
Maybe I'll do this.
Wrong place, wrong time.
Wrong place, wrong time.
I don't think I did anything wrong this time, you know?
So I was trying to turn out a girl and beat her when she didn't want to.
But, you know, you got to do that sometimes.
You got to let them know who's in charge.
Right.
It's a very odd thing.
Someone needs to tell him that his life is fucked up.
And luckily for him, his plumbing's a little off and there's a knock on the door to fix
it and it's just the right guy for both jobs.'s paul calhoun shit pipe enthusiast and he says
hey uh guy i gotta tell you yeah yeah how is it you come to arrive here yeah shit pipes uh
i can't they're clogged right all the way to the main to the main sewers dick i don't know how to
fuck you doing this i gotta be honest with you never mind helping kids get your shit pipes together forget the fucking kids I'd say I clean
your shit pipes and smack your wife but I can't because she fucking ran away on you because you're
a jerk off that's what happened for me anyway you smacked her right for me she took off otherwise
you're attempting to rape people what are you doing you can't right well what's wrong you see
let me let me show you something sir so come here I say sir when I'm showing you your pipes. I think you're an asshole.
But I say, hey, sir, look at the pipes.
It's just a habit.
You see this here?
I couldn't fit a safety pin down there.
That's how tight your shit pipes are.
Compacted with raw sewage.
You see, there's court papers in there.
There's a lot going on.
A dentist would say impacted.
It's impacted.
You got impacted shit in your pipes.
And you know
what i can't even deal with this i'm it's too big of a job for me poof and he's in a in a cloud of
pvc and shit and pipes is gone and warren is even more confused now he has no idea what's going on
but lucky for him people outside of jail in november of 71 have started a petition to get
him out of jail really he's too good of a petition to get him out of jail. Really?
He's too good of a guy in their community support. A Raider fans,
the Raider fans that want him out.
Um,
the,
the community education research foundation of California here,
uh,
David,
a Huffman who's house counsel for surf or kerf,
uh,
said that the legal writs are being prepared and will be filled in without
within the
next two weeks in federal and state courts in an effort to have Wells released from prison.
The Reverend Charles Moore, director of SURF, said, quote, we believe a terrible injustice
has been done to Warren Wells by the virtue of the flagrant abuse of the judicial process
in the Alameda County Superior Court.
Oh, my.
They want him out.
39 Raider players also signed the petition. Really? superior court oh my they want them out 30 39 raider
players also signed the petition which is pretty much all of them the team used to be like it's 45
guys so that's pretty much everybody um so that's the whole team i think al davis is on board i'm
sure john madden doesn't give a shit you'd like him in there so uh they said that if the judge
does not act on the recommendations of the director of corrections because they said that they thought he was fine before january 3rd wells will have to serve his
original sentence because there's a certain the way it works he uh this guy also uh he replaced
attorney stanley gold as attorney for wells and said that he reviewed the records and facts of
the case and he's convinced that warren wells was not given a fair and impartial hearing and that there exists several basis upon which a valid appeal
can be taken to higher courts it's tough with probation and parole that's your you're already
done so it's it's it's at a discretion of a judge at that point which is tough if you're on probation
or parole um so uh yeah they're gonna they want to get him out um
january 1972 so he's still in there judge rules he must spend at least 90 days in a rehab facility
before he's released now this rehab facility is actually a cult it's called synanon. It's a cult. S-Y-N-A-N-O-N.
Synanon is the cult.
He spends 90 days there.
Let's talk about Synanon, shall we?
Want to know about a cult you knew nothing about?
This is a cult based on rehab.
This is a rehab cult.
I mean, if you're looking for the most,
I mean, that's what a cult has to do.
You got to find somebody that's at the bottom
of their fucking rope.
You're not going to find somebody very successful and happy and be like hey you like to change your whole belief system change your life they'd be like why my life is fucking
great why would i want to change it stupid it's not the bottom of the rope no the bottom of the
rope the end of the barrel jimmy the bottom of the ladder i don't know the people that were at
the bottom of the barrel yeah people that were looking at the most vulnerable, most people.
God damn it.
People that needed anything and just really words of encouragement or just showing acceptance.
Yeah.
It's a great place to find them.
It's genius.
If your life is going great, why would you want to change your belief system?
That could fuck everything up.
Don't rock the boat.
Don't fix it if it ain't broken.
There's a million sayings. If things are going well, don't fuck everything up right don't rock the boat right yeah who's that don't fix it if it ain't broken there's a million sayings don't if things are going well don't fuck it up stupid
nobody in a cult ever said life was going great well i was the ceo of exxon mobil and then i just
you know and then i found nexium yeah it's very strange you don't hear that often which i'm sure
someone will send us a tweet of a ceo that that joined the cult yes common no that's the point less common more common than it's more common to have like an
alcoholic guy who just got out of jail for the third time the only cult really where everybody's
doing great and then it gets worse is uh scientology well this that seems to be going
great for those people yeah this is very similar to Scientology, this cult.
It's Scientology.
It's rehab.
You know, Scientology, they believe that you don't need any therapy or mental help because
the Scientology system makes you brain perfect.
You're given everything you need.
You just have to be able to sharpen those tools to really use it all.
And they need to berate you and tell you how wrong you were about everything in your life before scientology same same edicts here right but it's almost like
because this started right around the same time as scientology and they kind of finger fucked each
other kind of uh it seems like an intertwined yeah not intertwined but they were taking some
cues from each other it's i don't know if they were or not but it seems like it but it seems like the later on because scientology was a looser yeah kind of
a more chill thing back then to where it is now they're almost where scientology is now and has
been for 25 30 years then wow like scientology looked at this and went this is the way to do it
we're way too loose with these people you need to they need to be berated by their family and friends i believe so this started by a guy named
charles dietrich he's a reformed alcoholic as he says um he was a member of aa alcoholics anonymous
which is what the synonym is and uh got it yeah so he said that uh everybody said that they he was a good speaker at the aa
meetings he was very into it yeah and um he said that he didn't like that people suffering from
addictions to drugs were not always welcomed into aa because people would think that you know the
addictions are different so they wouldn't let them in which if there's if you're in a small town
there's nothing else available it's probably better than nothing if you feel you need the support and you're looking
for support you know any support is probably better than none right does it matter what the
problem is uh based on the solution you know the solution is just different if you're if you're
addicted to crack and if you're a boozer your stories are much different you know what i mean
gambling is different too gambling is anonymous is entirely different thing it's the scene from half-Baked where he's like, you know, I'm addicted to marijuana.
He's like, I suck dick for coke.
I seen him.
You ever suck dick for weed, man?
Yeah, it's that sort of thing.
We're not doing the same shit, so it's a little bit different.
Bob Saget's fucking great.
That was funny.
I think that's who said it, right?
Yeah, and the guy who said, I seen him, is the guy from Real world season two who pulled the blanket off the ground i kicked out of the house yeah so
yeah he was a stand-up so anyway um this guy here he was upset about that and then one day he took
lsd okay in the late in the 60s he took lsd when it first started coming around he's one of these
guys because he's a i'm an intellectual type of guy the alcoholic founder of this yeah and and back
then when lsd first started out they the way the cia would do it they would like people would they
would like give it to their friends not this is before they were just dosing people but they would
and or after that too but they would it became a thing once it got out from the cia of like college professors and like groups of like
you know 40 year old older people that were successful and intellectual would all get in
big groups and our mind and take acid that's what it was it was a big thing like that and then it
got went got into the kids doing then it got crazy into the culture
But before that it was mainly like yeah, it was on college campuses
It would spread around and people sitting around they'd talk about what kind of mind expansion and all that shit
It was a you know whatever the cosmos man. Yeah, so he did that and on LSD
He saw a vision of creating his own
Program to respond to the needs of the drugs and the
alcohol and any addiction to anything.
He's going to handle it all.
Okay.
On it all.
So it starts with the good intentions.
Yes.
He says that he was the one to coin the phrase today is the first day of the rest of your
life.
Really?
That's what he claims.
But the sentence was the chorus of O Primario dia a celebrated song from a portuguese
singer in like 1912 well before him so it's it's just a phrase it's an idiom and you just say it
and it's you're an idiot perhaps he thought of it uh and had never heard it before maybe but he
certainly did not make it that's the thing how many jokes have you come up with which are done
already oh my god not yours sometimes i'll say something i'm like genius yeah write that shit into twitter somebody else see how
dumb you are that's the point that's the point 40 people said it today yeah it's been not even close
if it's obvious or any thought really 40 people tweeted it today forget about how many people said
it a million and then they tweeted it and most of them more famous than both of us.
And it's a mess.
So he had a group called Tender Loving Care.
And it gained a significant following.
And he ended up rolling all this into the Synanon Foundation in 1958.
It's a word.
He invented the word, obviously.
Integrating togetherness,ness sin with the unknown
anon. That's how he did it. So, oh boy, it began as a two year residential program, but he soon
concluded that its members could never graduate because a full recovery is impossible. And also
I have bills. Yeah. And then when they go away, then what people just coming in and out, right?
Can't have that shit. It'll be working yourself out of a job i need you forever yeah it's always god damn it i'm
pay pay me i'm gonna fix you and then you're gonna walk away i'm gonna end up fixing everybody
and then i'm out of work i'm too good at this that's the problem because i'm just too good
he uh he said the program was based on uh the testimony of fellow group members about their urges to relapse and all that sort of thing.
It differed from AA in that it was directed toward both drugs and alcohol.
So it developed also a business that sold promotional.
There you go.
That's where we come in.
Yeah.
Just like Jim Jones sold all the pictures of him.
And once you start moving merch, you can't quit.
It's a different story.
I got to do this forever.
It became. Well, want to hear how successful it was too god became an enterprise that at one time for a time runner generated roughly 10 million dollars a year in merch do you know
how fucking much merch that is back then t-shirts weren't 25 dollars back then 12 bucks fucking
maybe yeah i mean jesus christ yeah eight bucks so he's got merch making 10 million in merch
wow in a year and i've never heard of it that's what i'm saying that's how those shirts gotta
exist right um they have to they fucking have to or some some sort of merch if they were selling
10 million of it a year you'd have to sell everything there'd be so much of it left i
would think there's got to be a synonym casket it has to be people someone's buried in the synonym casket so in 1959
anything with anon and it's probably going to be not okay by the way so it just makes it is it
anonymous is it unknown whatever it is it's all bad so synonym just sounds bad so it moved uh they
moved from a storefront to an armory on the beach after that uh in the early 1960s because it started in 58 and 59 they moved to a
different armory early 60s uh the leader charles was able to uh basically he knew some hollywood
people and was able to this is what i mean just like scientology it's like they use this model
for scientology genius because this was back when they weren't really recruiting they didn't recruit
celebrities till the 70s. Like
John Travolta was an early guy when he was
in like Welcome Back Cotter and shit like
that. Otherwise they were like early adopters
of that shit. And that's what's
going on here. I figure they just took this
straight from these guys. Kirstie Alley
certainly got that from him in like Look Who's Talking
right? I think she was already in it.
That's why they were both in
there. Maybe not. Maybe she did it then but i hope i hope i didn't i hope it wasn't while cheers was happening
put it that way it's very sad for that so he ends up doing that in 1967 synanon purchases the club
casa del mar which is a huge beachside hotel in santa monica yeah because they're making 10 million
a year and this is from merch money. They're buying seaside hotels.
Awesome.
Fuck.
Used it as a headquarters and a dorm for those undergoing treatment for drug addiction.
Wow.
It's a great dorm.
Fuck.
Later on, they acquired a large building that had been the home of the Athens Athletic Club
in Oakland and transformed into a residential facility for them.
Outsiders were permitted to attend, quote quote the synanon game there as well
game uh children were reared communally in the synanon school like scientology not scientology
it's it is they belong to the scientology i mean it's so you're supposed to do but more like
jonestown was where they they'd actually dump them into a communal setting basically so totally different
thing uh they were they went to the synanon school juveniles in the justice system were often ordered
to enroll in synanon by california courts that's how out of control this got warren wells was
sentenced to synanon he had no choice but to go to these people that's why he didn't choose this
this was they were there were so many different forms of rehab and shit that they didn't really know what worked that anything for a moment that seemed to work. The state would say that seems to be the thing. And then they'd send people there. They were they were giving this cult kids. That's wild. Giving them kids and giving them NFL players apparently.
players apparently so um uh people without drug drug addictions even that people that were professional white collar people were invited to join as well a new york psychiatrist daniel
cassarelle uh md founder of ariba r e a r e b a which is the oldest surviving private addiction
treatment center in the united states and he's a co-founder of daytop village either which is a big
therapeutic community he visited there in 1962 lived there in 63 and wrote a book about the
experiences here um i didn't read the book because it was he was there for a year and he was like
this needs to be published this shit is crazy wow uh control over members occurred through the game
okay now this is what we wanted to get to the game is presented as a
therapeutic tool and they basically say it's like group therapy this is like group therapy but it's
not because it's basically you put someone in the middle and then you encourage the whole group to
humiliate this person and encourage the exposure of one another's innermost weaknesses you know
like scientology when they do your when
they do your uh audits that's what they're doing they're trying to basically they're getting all
the dirt on you all the information that we can use against exactly and and also breaking you down
mentally then by telling you what a piece of shit you are and how wrong you are it worked yeah it's
really a double it's dual-headed it works very well on very effective multiple levels. I got to say here.
So it got even worse after that, too.
See, there's these cults.
They get weirder over time, as we know.
Yeah.
People's Temple went from being Jim Jones went from being, you know, this place where everyone was accepted and we're going to get away from racism and all that to then.
OK, well, it's communal uh old people
give your pension checks because that way we can help people in the community so they did that and
then it went to okay let me fuck your wife yep and move to a fucking i get you secluded into the
jungle yeah let's go to the border of venezuela so we can uh that's the other thing that they
gave them this piece of the only reason they gave Jones is way off this topic.
But Jonestown, do you know why they were allowed to go to Guyana?
I have no idea why the government allowed them there because Venezuela is on their border
and Venezuela was threatening to take land away from Guyana because Guyana didn't have
a good army or anything like that.
Venezuela can just march in.
Sovereign ass church group in there.
If you not a sovereign ass church group, group of american citizens that too they can't overrun it on that because you will be attacked by the military piss off the u.s you
don't want that exactly so they basically said let's use these fucking people as a buffer so we
can't be attacked human shield and it worked because venezuela went well we can't take that
now there's americans on it and we don't want to fight america right now so that's why they're
known they were going to do us a favor yeah so uh by the mid 70s women were in synanon were now
required to shave their heads yeah women and there's pictures of these giant, huge groups of women with all shaved heads.
Yeah.
Married couples were made to break up and take new partners.
This all sound familiar to you?
This is all Jonestown.
This is all culty.
It's all of them mixed together.
Men were given forced vasectomies.
Now let's throw Heaven's Gate into the mix.
Oh, my God.
Let's throw Heaven's gate into the mix
and a few pregnant women were forced to have abortions well let's throw yeah that's maybe
not forcing they should have wanted it yeah we're just saying anyway um so this is this is like every
bad cult thing you've ever heard from each one pick each piece of fruit off of each tree and
throw it in one big basket and you got sin of like the worst pieces the worst pieces. Yeah, all the worst pieces. Take all the rotten
apples and toss them here. It's beautiful.
It's fucking crazy. And they
were very well known. Everyone knew who the fuck
they were. George Lucas needed
a large group of people with shaved heads
for the filming of THX 1138
and hired this huge group
of extras from Synanon to do it.
Holy shit, George. Not only him, Robert Altman,
another legendary director hired
numbers of synonyms to be extras for the gambling scenes in the movie california split unbelievable
so yeah it was um newcomers were first interviewed by synonym leadership to gain entrance into the
community yeah that's norman scientology upon they did that in jonestown too you'd have to
prove you weren't like an agitator
upon their arrivals newcomers were quit forced to quit uh to quit using drugs cold turkey
and just do withdrawal basically for the first few days of the program oh my so people on heroin
and shit that's that's actually dangerous yeah you gotta have a wing dedicated just to that yeah
because otherwise you can't just put that with regular people that are living there.
That's a rough thing for some of them.
I got to watch this fucking guy go through this?
That's bad.
And for the first 90 days of being in the community, you're expected to cease contact
with outside friends and family.
Three months.
Never good.
No.
If someone says, you shouldn't talk to your mom.
You know what?
Don't talk to the closest people in your lives while you detox from the worst thing in your life.
While we reprogram your brain.
That's so.
Members entered into a one in the first year of the first decade of this was going on.
They entered into a one to two year program and three stages aimed at preparing members to reenter greater society.
So it had a purpose.
During the first stage, they did community and housekeeping labor.
During the second stage, they worked outside of the community but still resided within the community third stage
they both worked and lived outside the community but just attended meetings regularly so they you
know like a church like a normal church so that's that's like get you up on your feet push you out
of the nest spread your little wings and there you go come back and say hi once in a while um after though in about 1968 68 that that time
period is when all this is when manson's coming about this is when this is becoming very popular
people are looking for shit to join that's when it changed into a lifetime rehabilitation program
yeah and uh with the premise that drug addicts will never truly be well enough to return to society. The only place for them is here.
Wow.
So, yeah, the game was the really bad one.
So they would have to tell all this horrible shit.
They were encouraged to be critical of everything during the game using harsh and profane language.
They call it attack therapy, basically.
And it's a very aggressive thing.
And outside of the game, though, they were required to be very civil to each other you'd be like you're a fucking piece
of shit and the second it's over it's like you come brother so and so let's go have a hot chocolate
like completely different which is even weirder forget that i just told you have a small penis
let's have chocolate say your tiny little shrivel up dick. Yeah. So it was their most prominent form of therapy.
And it also worked as obviously a way for leaders to collect the opinions of everybody
and kind of figure out where they stand.
Apparently, there was no hierarchy during the game.
Members could freely criticize even the highest leadership of the group who would then take
member concerns into consideration when deciding policy.
It's a friar's roast and they
utilize the information it's a free-for-all just it's we're throwing it on the table it's like
festivus i got a lot of problems with you people now i'm gonna tell you about them it's like
feats of strength they're up next holy shit so the game turned into a 72 hour version
and later on even diederich admitted that it was brainwashing.
Sure the fuck is.
You think?
Yeah.
It was eventually, basically they say you can break anybody in three days.
Like people that capture like fallen pilots and shit, like from other militaries.
Three days is the average where you can break even a strong person who's been trained to
not be broken.
You can break them.
I hate myself.
I don't know the – I mean, in a hostile environment, though, it's entirely different, obviously.
But three days, the first couple of days, I'd be like, I know.
I know.
I've been trying to say this.
Jesus Christ.
Would you talk to my therapist?
What the fuck?
The third day might be the day that I crumble, too.
Oh, my God.
So –
Yeah.
Oh, that's so funny the school here there's a school um that creates a schooling
for members the school was headed by a guy named al bauman who believed in an innovative philosophy
that aimed to teach children in the same manner to think differently teach children in the same
manner to think differently same manner same way teach them the same way to think differently which makes no sense uh the school attracted lawyers screenwriters business executives
basically all a bunch of like and a progressive people who are looking to 70s was huge late 60s
and 70s were huge on alternative schools and like they don't do work here they like
their mud pies express themselves and through that they'll learn math. I don't know how that works.
We can get to the same outcome without the same rigmarole that they've been doing.
It's pretty fucking interesting.
We can do it our way.
Jesus.
No, you can't.
So some people covered, broadcasters, newspapers, they covered this whole thing, the news, but
a lot of them didn't say shit about it because much like Scientology, they are very, very lawsuit happy.
And Scientology, it's lawsuits, it's threats, they do everything.
Yeah, it's the whole thing.
Have you been reading this Danny Masterson shit?
Dude, it's insanity.
It's fucking bananas.
It's insanity.
It's the same shit that you read about everybody.
It's the same exact shit.
But they're saying this shit in court now.
They were saying it in court before.
But in a court case where somebody's being tried for obviously some of the most horrible
It's happened many, many times.
They just keep doing it.
This is nuts what I'm reading.
They just keep doing it.
They killed dogs.
It's fucking bonkers.
Second, two of them.
It's, yeah.
They killed somebody's dog.
Then the person talked.
Then they killed their other dog.
Did they got to replace that dog?
I got your replacement dog i
got fluffy and i got fluffy too it's crazy new fluffy i got him so they would there was obviously
uh legal action here who made claims of libel lawsuits ultimately turned out to be a large
part of what fuck them though because by when you sue somebody because they said something
about you you then have to show that that's not true right and when you do that you have to then
give access to your shit so that's the problem yeah that's why some people that are very famous
who have a lot of shit talked about them you go why they should be suing people and they'll say
i should sue these people ever wonder why they don't right because then they'd have to show that
they actually what they said is true right that's the point or worse yeah other shit's true or shit they didn't even know about
what happens all the time so uh um yeah this gave all sorts of internal documents journalists got
a hold of and it really uh you know was there um people there's rumors that they were they were uh
synonym was in the involved in the disappearance of a woman named Rosalina Cole in 1972.
She had received a court order to enroll there and then disappeared, which she could have disappeared before she went.
Who knows?
Initially, though, Synanon wasn't into violence but then changed the rules, Dieterich, to allow for violence in order to maintain control.
When they found out that's effective.
It's effective.
They're like, you know what?
When you beat the shit out of people, they listen better.
Much of the violence that was carried out by basically his own little SS force
called the Imperial Marines.
No.
Yeah.
He had the Iraqi Republican Army Saddam Hussein had around him
and the SS and whatever.
He used to California work with Imperial.
Every dictator has some sort of little
group around him to do you know enforce their bullshit uh there's over 80 violent acts were
committed including mass beatings at hops hospitalized teenagers and ranchers who were
beaten in front of their families uh people who left were at risk of physical violence for being
a quote splitty yeah what do they call it uh separatist the scientologist oh
whatever leah remini is now yeah uh uh it's on the tip of my tongue so do not tweet it because
we'll have it in a second here it's the uh a uh it'll come to us before the end of the show
this is what are they calling these uh splitties uh fuck god damn it i don't know i know what it
is and it's on the's on my tongue i don't
need the phone it's right there don't worry it's uh a so-and-so person a damn it you know what
katie holmes is yeah so uh and nicole kidman yeah anyone who's ever been married to tom cruise
yeah anybody that's divorced him yeah uh One, a guy named Phil Ritter
was beaten so severely
that his skull was fractured
and he fell into a coma
and got bacterial meningitis.
Oh, no!
Yeah, not good.
Almost died.
Survived it, though.
Jesus.
Paul Morantz is a reporter.
He's a journalist turned lawyer
who sued them in 1977
on behalf of a couple named
Francis and Ed Wynn
who claimed that Francis had been kidnapped, brainwashed, and tortured by the group for, quote,
for purposes of financial gain despite her emotional instability.
They were awarded, the couple, $300,000 from Synanon.
And this lawyer, reporter turned lawyer, basically was trying to get all sorts of other people out,
return lawyer basically was trying to get all sorts of other people out, lobbying the state and Marin County supervisors and the State Department of Health to crack down on
them and all that sort of shit.
Another guy almost got beaten to death here.
And Morant's figured he was they probably didn't like him.
He got threatening phone calls coming all hours of the night.
And then all of a sudden they stopped.
He's like, what's like what are they
what are they planning now that's weird uh so he bought a shotgun he said he was always looking
over his shoulder checking his car for car bombs before he got in like he pissed off you know
fucking carmine persico over here or something this is like this is a lot to
a lot to deal with um one day he returned home it's october 11th 1977 he wanted to turn on the tv
game one of the world series was on dodgers yankees yeah i want to sit back and watch
baseball he said for one moment quote for one moment i'm not going to think about synanon
at all he said i'm just going to watch the baseball game he put his notebooks in the
kitchen table walked by his mail slot and uh he could see an outline of a package.
He thought it was like a scarf or something in there.
Yeah.
In this package.
He couldn't have his glasses on.
So he opened the package, and he said, Jesus Christ, the rattlesnake came out of it.
They mailed him a rattlesnake oh my god package um
yeah he said quote they don't get me with this i'm not that stupid he was thinking and then uh
he it bit him it got him it got him oh jesus four and a half foot uh rattlesnake and uh it dropped
to the floor and all that and he was yelling call the police call an ambulance i got bit by a
rattlesnake synanon sent me a rattlesnake.
God, Jesus.
Yeah.
So Walter, this went national now because he's a fucking journalist and a lawyer.
This isn't some alcoholic you pulled off the street and tied the fuck with here.
So Walter Cronkite even was talking about it on the national.
I mean, that's the news.
And he called it, quote, bizarre even by cult standards, which called it a cult, A, and then said it's even worse than normal cults which is a lot and uh morantz uh said that uh he ended up writing a
book about it and uh exposing their whole deal in mid-78 the nbc nightly news produced a news
segment on the controversies with synanon. Following the broadcast, several executives of the NBC
network and its corporate chairman received
hundreds of threats from Synanon members
and supporters. Yeah, they're just like
fucking Scientology. NBC
continued with the series. They just said, fuck you
and kept doing it. You're not going to bully a
television network in the 70s. You know
how powerful a TV network was in
the 70s? And also, if you're doing that
and they talk about it it
gives more credence to the story more people watch what are you doing that's the thing you're just
making it worse you ignore it yeah nowadays networks have no power because nobody watches
them nobody gives nobody under 75 watches fucking network television like i'm gonna watch what's on
cbs tonight for the sitcoms no one's doing that anymore a number of reasons people don't listen because they don't believe it which is which is yeah they're crazy crazier so this was going on
there and they were like you know we're a network there's three networks and literally we run this
fucking country like fuck you basically so they did it and uh a small uh a small circulation
newspaper the point reyes light would receive a Pulitzer Prize for its public
service for covering Synanon
at this time when other people were afraid to
so several weeks
after they started getting threats at NBC
two Synanon members placed
de-rattled rattlesnakes in the mailbox
of that's what they found out later on
that's even scarier that's why he didn't know it was
they de-rattled them Jesus
that's how that worked that's why he didn't know he rattled them jesus that's how that worked
here um so yeah he ended up good it's fucking great he was hospitalized for six days after this
rattlesnake bite by the way this shit coagulates your blood in the veins james oh it's oh it's
awful rattlesnakes are vicious nasty fuckers man they're disgusting such bad animals so this
prompted a police investigation six weeks later the lap the LAPD performed a search of the ranch in Badger that found a recorded speech by Diederich in which he said, quote,
We're not going to mess with the old time, turn the other cheek religious postures.
Our religious posture is don't mess with us.
You can get killed dead, literally dead.
These are real threats.
So just in case you
think this is hyperbole i'm just making a speech this is actual legal things i'm saying what a
fucking idiot you're going to die he said they are draining life's blood from us and expecting us to
play by their silly rules we will make the rules i see nothing frightening about it i'm quite willing
to break some lawyer's legs and next break his wife's legs and threatened to cut her mom her
child's arm off that is the end of that lawyer wow that is a very satisfactory humane way of
transmitting information i do not want an ear and a glass of alcohol on my desk so he's like that's
a better way to do it i could do it that way but i don't have to so they found this recording and
they're like this place is fucked up. Everything that guy said is true.
They also came across multiple lawsuits and arrests against Synanon members.
Diederich was arrested while drunk
on December 2nd, 1978.
I'm fixing all of you
while I continue to pollute.
Fuck yeah.
Two other Synanon residents,
Joe Musico,
that's a great name,
and Lance Kenton,
who says it's says son of the musician
stan kenton but i don't know who that is either uh were also arrested and pleaded no contest
charges of assault and conspiracy to commit murder lance and they got prison uh diederich
received probation because his doctors claimed due to his ill health he would die in prison
um he was disallowed from taking part in managing synanon and they struggled to survive and you
know all that shit now that they're right there they don't have their leader and their reputations
fucked the irs ended up revoking that they had tax exempt status unbelievable which other
organizations do that shouldn't also and uh ordered them to pay 17 million dollars in back
taxes because the irs yanked their tax exempt status and said and back there now you know
now you owe the back because we shouldn't have done this since you've not been yeah what you
purport to be for that ever back to that date you gotta pay oh shit yeah and they ended up um
finally that bankrupted synanon and they formally dissolved in 1991 thank god so that's where they
sent our guy but they've created such dangerous shit in
the interim too oh god it's horrible the amount of fucked up things they've done yeah ruined
countless people countless people and gave ideas to others and everything else so that's what they
put mr what is warren warren they put warren yeah because we got so into the other thing warren went
through that he went through that.
He went through that.
He's gone through fucking Jim Crow and that.
Yeah.
This is not good.
Jim Crow and cult at the same time.
In Alaska.
In Alaska by the army.
That's what they like.
We'll send you.
They'll ship you off to Alaska.
See how you like that.
So a court order releases him from Synanon, and his attorney is to bring him to the san domino retreat house
in danville where he must stay according to the order um the al davis said there's a strong
feeling in the raider organization that anything said would be emotional it would not help warren
wells right now uh he's been gone from our community for nearly a year and that's a long
time for any young man certainly we welcome him back so will he be allowed to go to training camp in 72 um a judge says quote this is the judge
deeden who's been sentencing him as far as i'm concerned wells may go to training camp he said
so there you go uh he i guess they said that uh the court directed the probation officer to communicate with Al Davis.
Talk to Al. Al Davis has now become an arm of the probationary department somehow.
The court has received a communication from the probation officer that the Raider management will be fully cooperative with the probation department concerning Wells' supervision.
So he'll be placed under the Raiders' supervision while at training camp as a condition of court approval.
That's fucking hilarious. And then he has to go to a retreat house in Danville there fuck man now
the Raiders issued a press conference say issued a press release saying that the Raiders have no
way of assuming supervisory capabilities for Wells while he's in camp like it's obviously not what we
do here uh his meeting with Wells had a meeting with Pete Roselle, who's the commissioner. And yeah, this is Roselle said a thorough review of the case with the court. The probation officer, the player himself and other interested in informed parties has led me to conclude that Warren Wells should be permitted to return to football after a year's absence as the court recommended.
after a year's absence as the court recommended.
So here it comes.
The comeback.
First of all, they don't want to make him do press conferences and allow the media to fucking come at him.
So the players are kind of running interference for him, basically,
kind of a thing.
And they say that he says it'll take him two to three months
to get back to form at this point
he said the type of program they have at synanon concentrates on character yeah there is no
motivation toward physical activity i had a football in my room that i could use to practice
catching by myself so there's no physical it's all whatever drilling it off the wall just throwing it
up in the air catching it like an eight-year-old whose dad won't play with him. Playing in bed, throwing it up.
Yeah, one of those.
Oh, boy.
So he said, I wasn't able to get any kind of recreation in the last few months, so I guess maybe it will take a couple months.
I was working in the gym at Vacaville and Jamestown, and he said, and when I went to Cal State yesterday, I did some jogging.
He said, I never had any doubts I could play when I got out.
I just was waiting to see what the courts would say.
I'm really glad to be back.
I really can't explain it.
So he said he watched several Raider games,
and he said that just made the pain of watching them first.
He said it wasn't as much fun watching and not being out there.
I feel the same way, honestly.
I'd much rather be playing wide receiver for the Raiders, but unfortunately.
He said, in fact, during the last Kansas City game, I couldn't stand it, so I went away and turned on the radio.
And he, yeah.
So Madden says that he'll keep him out for a few days and see how he's doing and if he wants to go in there.
So Al Davis issued orders that Wells gives one press conference and then that's it
get that out got everything you want to ask him out of your system and leave him the fuck alone
for the rest of the time um he said basically it's one false move and he's done and they don't
want him to fuck up um so uh they're talking about you know last time he was playing he was doing so
well so you know why not and then they then they say why can't you be more
like paul warfield they have this whole thing of paul warfield's a classy guy and he catches passes
why can't you be like him yeah what's up with that um so he ends up they give him a new roommate too
who is gene upshaw the head of the players union forever and a real kind of a square kind of a guy
like he's still there isn't he he might be yeah he's uh unless
he's dead i don't know if he might have died recently but he's considered like a real upstanding
kind of cat so uh you know they're gonna move him in there so uh jesus wells has he's had such a
fucking mess of a time here um he says uh john madden says well he's not a free man in our
training camp nobody is we're on the go from 9 a.m to 11 p.m
which the way they described it they kind of were i've read a book about raiders training
camp you're not a free man not a free man okay and then they would sneak out yeah from there
right but like they were talking about how they would all come in like there'd be this huge
guys would like turn the lights off and kill the engine and coast into the motel parking lot to
park so nobody would hear.
They'd climb in their windows.
No power steering now, but we're going to wrestle this steering wheel.
Jesus.
This is fucking nuts.
How much do you want beer?
A lot.
So nobody has run the go from 9 to 11.
The decision to room him with Upshaw came up because his former roommate, Eldridge Dickey, is no longer with us.
Warren's attitude has been excellent.
He's not carrying a chip or anything. He genuinely
wants to play football again. He seems
very determined. He's just happy to be here
and I don't blame him. And he says he likes
having him around. He worked out, you
know, basically
he said, but Sinanon didn't
help him with the not doing anything.
Madden says he played basketball
and lifted weights. It's a matter of what degree
he's out of shape. Can he go deep once deep once or twice oh he can go deep once or twice but there are thousands of
guys in saloons who can do that no there aren't there really aren't the trick is to be able to
do it for two hours it's endurance that might uh give him trouble after all the receivers run every
play so that makes sense uh after all receivers run on every play. Yeah, they're always running unless they're blocking.
So they had drafted a bunch of guys, too.
And Warren says, what can you say?
Oh, I'm sorry.
This is Madden again.
What can you say?
At the time, we didn't know about Warren because they drafted a receiver before he even got out.
I'm sure we didn't make a mistake.
Would be hard to say that we might have gone for somebody else.
So Warren, he's got a good opportunity here, and everybody likes him.
Madden said, quote, there's just something about the guy that makes folks care. While he was away, not a day passed that somebody didn't ask about him, hoping that everything would straighten out for him.
I sincerely hope his troubles are over, and not just because he's a great player either.
Not bad.
Problem is, he says he knows
he can't handle alcohol and he's been given a court appointed advisor dr jb jones who's a
professor of psychology at texas southern university his alma mater they gave him him
and he says wells can't handle alcohol he said the problem is for him to steer clear of it
and uh you know just stay away from everything.
He says one or two drinks and Warren has an almost complete personality change.
That's a certain personality.
They just can't have it touch their lips because it's just completely.
I've seen that.
Right.
Two drinks and you're a mean fuck.
Not you.
Right.
It's very similar to people with.
It's very similar to people that can't handle
like lactose they still fucking eat it and then they're a goddamn mess yeah yeah so this is even
worse because you're not in pain you're just an asshole to other people it's just different in
that you don't have diarrhea you have diarrhea in the mouth and you say and do dumb shit no shit
diarrhea of the hands and mouth yeah well said quote as kids in the slums we used to drink maybe
to escape having to think about getting ahead we would sit around and drink wine and talk about what we were going to do in life
i guess we were just fooling ourselves jesus christ and then he got it and we got ahead of
it and fucking grim now it's a problem now it's a problem um he this the doctor says since the
court is sending back to texas last month warren has made an honest attempt to straighten out
it's the first step then the stabbing thing had to happen before that yeah but i think he'll make it in the end i offered him a
drink not too long ago he turned it down why'd you do that to test him i guess what are you doing man
why would you do that what if he says yes maybe it doesn't mean anything now but someday it might
why would you do that hey want a drink no dick thanks is he gonna bet a gambling out addict that they can't get them gambling by
the end of the day jones said he was uh also instrumental in him being released after 60 days
of his one of his you know things that he got out he said uh wells took on the family responsibility
when he started pro football wells his father is a laborer who doesn't make hardly any money
and he said there's still three young children at their home.
Warren was one of the oldest.
Quote, Warren is picking up the tab on his younger brother's education.
He also bought a home for his family.
By the way, the most he ever made in a season of football is $38,000.
How the hell are you buying houses?
Which isn't.
That's a lot.
It's more back then.
Yeah, it's Beaumont.
So it's going to be cheaper to the whole town.
No.
It's more back then.
Yeah, it's Beaumont, so it's going to be cheaper, too.
He can buy the whole town.
No shit.
He said, you know the thing that impresses me most about him is his loyalty to his family,
his love for his parents.
I've always felt that a man who sincerely loves his parents has something he can build on.
Warren Wells is no angel.
You can be sure of that.
But he's no devil either.
He's confused. The latest incident, which very nearly took his life, talking about the stabbing certainly doesn't make batters matters better he needs time to figure it out
so um they asked pete roselle is it good to have this guy in the league is this bad for the image
and he said a case like this is obviously of concern we're in the limelight and i don't like
to get letters about uh about children's living room idols. But I think you have to show compassion sometimes as his hair turns white silver.
He's won Silver Hair Middle-Aged White Man of the Year before.
Pete Rozelle?
He's a former winner, yeah.
It's very difficult to make a judgment that's going to ruin a man's life.
In most cases, this is the only economic shot at self-improvement these fellows have.
If the judge is willing to take a chance, so am I.
Okay.
So there's a preseason game, and he says he doesn't think he'll play very much he said i've made good progress in
getting in shape but after a year layoff it's going to be hard for me to go out there and just
play so i'm gonna have to practice more um the weird thing is everybody said he's there's something
wrong with him he's a different guy now he's a different guy
now uh in the brain he's just kind of um rewired yeah uh one guy here says quote during most
practices he has just been going through the motions half speed um he's just not he's like
in like a fog like he's been yeah but i mean the description gave him a lobotomy basically is the
way they're talking about the description he made of of what he's been doing to train was not i
jogged a little bit uh yeah i threw the ball to myself practicing they're all saying like he's
it's his whole everything everything is just there's something wrong with him there like
the brainwashing didn't help him or something.
Quarterback Darrell LaMonica said, quote, he's taking his time.
He said, but he hasn't lost anything.
I've seen him several times going one-on-one against Willie Brown.
And when he wants to put it on, he's got it all.
Trying to, you know, cover for him basically as they do.
Another guy, a newspaper guy named Ken Richardson, Wells said wells said quote sometimes i feel like this is wells sometimes i feel like i have these chains binding me and i can't get loose and be the real
me then again i think i'm pretty free right now it's not like i would want to do any of those
things i can't do anyway but it's the thought that even if i wanted to i still couldn't and
that makes me feel uncomfortable sometimes you can't drink i guess um he uh
people have i this has become a thing now a lot of a lot of press is kind of coming down on the
nfl for not booting guys out who have rape charges and shit like that you know as they do now except
back then it was less uh other players said that he was just a drastically different guy. They said the speed was gone.
The brain was there.
Former tight end Raymond Chester said, quote,
he seemed to be emotionally void.
Everything seemed to be in slow motion, physically and mentally.
Like he was too thinking about, I don't know what they did to him there.
But I mean, it's funny because other coaches are like worried that,
oh shit, the Raiders got him back.
Oh fuck.
Well, I mean, it's funny because other coaches are worried that, oh, shit, the Raiders got him back.
Oh, fuck.
Hank Stram said, quote, that's no surprise that he's coming back.
We expected it.
Naturally, Wells will help the Raiders.
Everybody knows he's a great receiver.
Then he talks about how more zone has come in and he might not be able to play as well with all the zone defense.
So he said, look what happened to Paul Warfield with Miami last year.
There you go. He's Miami and Maynard is the Jets.
Thank you.
Fuck.
Yeah.
He's their guy in the right.
Yeah.
I don't know why for a second.
Yeah.
For a second.
I thought the Rams, he caught only 43 passes.
Talk about Warfield.
There just aren't as many touchdowns throughout the league in the past few years.
So I think Warren needs to like he's had a lot.
It's been a really busy last three years.
He is only 30 yeah i'm not this three years is the more active than any three years i've ever had in my life like he needs to
sit back unwind maybe go out and go to the movies let's see what's playing shall we well on july 10th
1972 okay let's see what's playing number one one, The Godfather is playing. Okay, wow. Yeah, it's out in its first run.
Oh, my God.
You can go see a masterpiece in 72.
72.
Barbra Streisand in What's Up, Doc?
Yeah.
Is playing.
What else do we have here?
Clockwork Orange is in the goddamn theaters.
Godfather and Clockwork Orange you could see in the same day.
And then the next day you can go back and see The Graduate because that's also playing.
Cabaret is playing. Ooh, Shaft. Yeah oh shaft yeah fuck yeah shaft's big score is playing hell yeah um uh
fiddler on the roof they have going on hitchcock's frenzy i've never seen that one yeah um there uh
what else here uh andy warhol's lonesome cowboys, that's a porn because now on the bottom there's a bunch of porn.
Andy Warhol's?
Yup.
As much.
What the fuck?
Oh my God.
It has.
It has like quotes of people.
Reviews?
From this.
People that have seen it or like people that are in it?
Yeah.
Second Andy Warhol feature, Flesh, comes after that.
And it says-
Did Andy Warhol make porn?
Apparently he made like gay porn.
Did I not know that?
It says, as much as I am curious, maybe a bit too much for many people, but that's their
problem.
It's Warhol's best film is what the LA Times says.
I'm going to have to Google that.
Okay.
what the la times says i'm gonna have to google that okay and then the eyesight club in hayward features adult films now two hours and dancers on stage oh my god oh boy playing quality first
run super x films on a giant screen so you can all whack it in one big room while a live woman
dances oh yeah and then another the alibi some club see the girls on stage plus adult
films a big two and a half hour show the butler school days and the contortionists are playing
then you can go down and see suburbia confidential adults only look it's just got a picture of a lady
moaning on it james has porn being so
accessible ruined this is that why it doesn't exist anymore or if we just look it up on your
phone why would you go whack off with others no one wants to watch porn in a group anymore
i'm kind of i'm kind of like i don't want to go see this do you want to go check it out right i
want to see porn on a big screen tv while while somebody dances while somebody dances on stage with a big tub of popcorn i want part of this oh my god i'm in
the people of the 70s don't know how good they had no they really don't that's amazing fuck uh
theater 2 is playing agent 69 all right and fantasy of love I know what happens there. Doors open at 9 a.m.
Good grief!
It's a little too early to whack it to Agent 69 at 9 a.m.
Get a job, sir!
Right? That's too early.
Then after that, well, the night shift comes off.
You need somewhere to whack it.
Then there's another one.
I don't even know what the hell the name of this.
Love Swedish Style.
Oh.
And this James Bacon from the L. the la harold examiner says well done the first swedish runway production or runaway
production in the tradition of i am curious yellow and fanny hill now comes love swedish style
sweden the country where love is more than a four-letter word. Yeah. What?
Fuck, I don't know what they're talking about. It's fuck or love.
And then plus super 16-millimeter pussycat playgirls on every show.
Call theaters for, quote, censored second hit.
They won't even let them show the name of it in the paper.
That's how dirty it is.
Second hit.
And senior citizens, now you too can enjoy
the action every monday through friday between 2 and 5 p.m for one dollar off regular admission
price whack your old cock down here his 70 will give you a dollar off wow and then finally head
on down when you're done for a drink at the pussycat which is in oakland uh former and also the pussycat 2 formerly the gay theater in san jose
so there's that now holy shit san francisco that's where the fun shit was i don't even know
if that was in san francisco oh yeah it was oakland yeah there we go broadway oakland yeah
that's what it was from unreal so he's gonna need that something to do because he's cut by the raiders and oh no he'll never
play pro football again it's over he's done um yeah he just wasn't the same player john madden
said it was the hardest cut that he's ever had to make in his life he said um well said quote mr
davis uh al davis thought my speed was getting slow cliff branch i watched him in practice and
he looked good to me.
I figured he'd help the Raiders because I was sluggish.
I knew I was going out when he got there because I knew he was going to help the team.
I didn't feel bad about going out.
So he got cut for Cliff Branch, who's a fucking Hall of Famer.
So that's fine.
Yeah.
John Madden said, if he could have played long enough, he could have been the greatest wide receiver who's ever played.
Madden's seen, and he said that in the 90s.
So he's seen quite a few players.
That's after Jerry Rice.
That's after seeing all that.
Fred Belitnikoff, who's a Hall of Fame wide receiver for the Raiders, said, quote, he was probably the best receiver I've ever seen.
Wow.
Not bad.
Fred needed glue to do that.
Yeah, no shit.
But he did.
He needed stick them. to do that yeah no shit but uh he did he needed to stick him later on maybe a reason why later on
when he's kind of out of this whole thing a reporter shows him a picture of synanon headquarters
and asked is this a good place or a bad place and he said quote uh-huh bad place yep that's all he
said i'm not gonna say anything else i don't want a rattlesnake in the mail. No, no, no. So May 7th, 1973.
No more football.
Nothing.
He's arrested again over the weekend for investigation of drunkenness, disturbing the peace and resisting arrest in Berkeley, California, after a verbal run in with two police officers at a restaurant.
Wow.
Jesus Christ.
Wow.
Jesus Christ.
Wow.
Sergeant David Silstra said officers Russell Lopes and Michael Stabstram, Jesus, were having a cup of coffee when Wells came in, sat behind them, and began calling them names.
He was drunk.
He wasn't even belligerent, and then the cops got called.
He showed up to fuck with the cops.
Yeah, he was like, there's cops.
Fuck you, pig.
Which I guess you want or whatever, but there could be consequences for that.
which I guess you want or whatever,
but there could be consequences for that.
The officers said Wells continued to, quote,
scream, rant, and rave until he was finally arrested,
and they had to arrest him, they said.
June 1973, he is acquitted of drunk driving on May 5th, which we didn't even know about.
He apparently had a gun in his car then, too, as well,
on May 5th of the, may 5th 73 acquitted and uh charges are still pending for disturbing the peace and resisting
arrest though too because he freaked out and he had a gun and he fought with them 1977 he's arrested
for robbery yeah in beaumont oh no he moves back home jimmy jesus it's not good and he's robbing
people well let's find out what happened now
according to him yeah wrong place he never knows what's going wrong place wrong time i don't know
i just said i don't i don't know what i'd do if you cut somebody and then a woman who i've never
seen before stabbed me he says quote it was a strange coincidence that's how most robbery
charges start out i was on my way to baptist hospital to have a physical
checkup because i had gotten stabbed in the chest years earlier that has nothing to do with this is
this is 1977 that was six years ago uh he said a young lady by the name of mrs elizabeth henderson
i didn't know her name at the time walked out of the grocery store with her daughter i'd been
walking a long time and i was dry i asked the lady for a quarter to get a coke
she didn't say anything but went to her truck the police pulled up later and said someone in the
store called because a robbery was committed mrs henderson said that i said quote if you don't give
me your money i'm gonna take your daughter then the courts took it from there and they did take
it from there the courts as a matter of fact, said you, because of his previous record, said you, sir, may fuck off two to eight years in prison.
They give him for this.
There's no way what he says happened.
I don't know.
I mean, can I have a may I have a quarter, please?
And then you're two to eight years.
That's that.
Yeah.
I mean, people, I'm sure it's possible.
But it seems like there's probably more of that story, just like there's more to the story of, I didn't even know the young lady and she stabbed me.
There's something more to it.
I don't know if he said, I'm going to take your daughter, but he might have said something else.
Who knows?
One person's word versus another very rarely equates to two to eight years.
That's the thing.
The court can't do that.
That's wild.
I hope not.
Jesus Christ.
He sent to the maximum security unit at Ellis instead of the minimum security facility
in Ferguson where Bob Hayes is.
He's the former Dallas Cowboy wide receiver and Olympic gold medalist.
All he wanted was a Coke?
All he wanted was a Coke.
All he wanted was a Pepsi.
Just one Pepsi.
And Mrs. So-and-so wouldn't give it to me.
Two to eight years in a maximum security.
Two to eight years in a maximum,. Two to eight years in a maximum,
which is, it's institutionalized, I guess.
They weren't kidding, suicidal tendencies.
So anyway, prison doesn't change you, he said, though.
Prison doesn't change you.
It's up to the individual.
A prison can make you better or it can make you worse.
That's right.
So December 1979, a writer named Dave Newhouse
goes to see him.
Want to hear how he starts out
the article yeah huntsville texas prison inmate number 271150 entered the visiting room yeah sat
down and slowly peered through the heavy wire and plexiglass at the reporter on the other side
that's him by the way post uh coming through uh guard towers and uh yeah he left that part out
you know how to get in there.
Barbed wire top.
Now we're in here, though.
So, yeah, he said he lives in a six-by-12-foot world at that point.
That's his cell size.
And he said he's been reading, though.
He's been reading African history, chemistry, child psychology,
because he majored in elementary education.
He says he has an interest in that
yeah uh they said when are you getting out and he said this is uh he said i'm uh this is 1979
i'll get out november of next year i want to stay on the right road find a job that will take me
through life sometimes it takes a big fall to rise again which rock bottom yeah that's true um
seen but he said that a couple of times before um he says his biggest
problem is alcohol uh that is his biggest problem he says that he isn't an alcoholic though yeah
he said he hasn't been able to quench his thirst for booze since high school but you know he's good
and this is again this is where he says i think i've beaten it it's not it's best not to drink up
this is that that time there um most he said his teammates don't even know what happened to him because he disappeared.
He says, quote, I was supposed to write Fred Belitnikoff before I got here, but I didn't.
But say hello to the guys and wish them the best of luck for me.
I got my eyes on them.
They said, what are you going to do when you get out?
And he says, I'll go back to Beaumont and live with my parents who are still behind me.
This is sad, man.
My father told me i
can beat this come out and start a clean life so i hope so i mean jesus hasn't been able to quench
his thirst since high school can you believe that man i'm not an alcoholic i'm not an alcoholic no
jesus christ uh they asked what are you doing in jail right now i've been drinking thunder chicken
since the thunder chicken right he says quote i'm in the line section right now. I've been drinking Thunder Chicken since the Thunder Chicken. Right. He says, quote,
I'm in the line section
right now.
We pick pecans
and cotton,
the chief crops here,
and plant sugar cane.
Sometimes we work
two days a week,
sometimes three.
It's not really
physical work,
but it does become hard
picking pecans
when you're not
getting paid for it.
He's on a prison farm.
Yeah, he's on a prison farm.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, you just described.
Yeah, that's not good.
He then says only his brothers and his sister.
He has four brothers and a sister.
They're the only ones that really visit him.
His parents, he said they would come about every Sunday, but they don't come as often now with the they don't come as often now.
He said just doesn't happen.
He said right now I'm basically thinking about staying healthy.
I'm trusting in God that I might go back to school and work with youth i did some work with youngsters in houston
but they had financial problems and i was the one that that was laid off okay okay he has no money
uh he said he needs money he said we all need money the system isn't run on anything else i
don't think to be financially well off i I'd do anything detrimental to society. He's going to be good now.
What does that mean, Jimmy?
He's good now.
He's good now.
Super good.
A guard, Benny Oliphant, said, quote, he's never in trouble.
He doesn't let this place get him down like a lot of people.
He's doing fine.
He's definitely good now.
He also said he thought this would be his last big fuck up.
He said, after the first time, I said it would be my last one.
You never know.
I never wanted to make the first fall, which makes sense.
He does 200 pushups and 100 sit ups every night and does stretching exercises in his room.
Yeah, he's doing his shit.
He, you know, he's never in trouble.
Like I said, he's doing fine.
June 1980 newspaper reports come out while he's still in prison in June.
Newspaper reports come out and say that Warren Wells was stabbed in prison by another inmate and is clinging to life.
Oh, boy.
So he's been stabbed.
Luckily for him, Warren Wells is a common name.
And it wasn't him.
It's a different guy named Warren Wells who was stabbed at San Quentin Prison.
And the victim's identification and connection with the Raiders
was provided by public prison information.
They said it's Warren Wells, the Raider,
and his name was Warren Wells.
Not that Warren Wells.
A different Warren Wells.
Blah, blah, blah.
I mean, that's bad.
You almost feel bad for the stabbed guy.
Not nearly, though, as bad as I feel for first of all that guy yeah uh second of all warren
wells owner wells solutions llc in palm beach gardens florida warren wells senior consultant
at warren wells consulting no shit uh buffalo new york warren wells vice president at tsg solutions
inc a continental mapping company oh Carlsbad, California.
I don't think that's him.
Warren Wells, General Counsel at Truman State University in Kirksville, Missouri.
Warren Wells, Webmaster at www.vavictims.com, Houston, Texas.
Still in the VA?
I guess.
Warren Wells, Digital Program Office and Chief of at to cio at eastman chemical company in
bluntville tennessee probably not a right that's probably not him uh 1999 now let's catch up 20
years later what the fuck's he doing what could he possibly do well he's been on and off the streets
since then no he is drinking heavily yeah his brother, Oscar, tried to help and started to set up his NFL pension fund in 1981.
But his brother died and never finished it for him.
So Gene Upshaw ended up helping him with that and finally helped him establish the fund, which is his only support.
It's his pension fund.
He's been to rehab twice uh he was put in the
beaumont beaumont detox center after passing out in the middle of the street a few years ago he
just fell asleep in the street and almost got hit by a car so they had to put him in fucking rehab
that's passing out no that's passing out um wow that's wild um But he walked out and declared himself cured after eight days.
I'm good.
Talk about I'm good now.
Eight days.
All cured.
Post a pass out in the middle of the road.
All cured.
Oh, fine.
He twice received treatment at the VA hospital, because he's a veteran, but walked out of
that one as well.
Each time he goes back to the streets.
This is how hard alcohol is to break down.
It's hard. Any drugs there. Any alcohol. That's what he's doing. He back to the streets. It's this is how hard alcohol is. It's hard.
Any drugs or any alcohol.
That's what he's doing.
He's on the streets.
And a reporter asked him, you know, you can get help.
There's help available.
He says, quote, I don't need no help.
Yeah, I don't think I need any help.
I reckon I'm too strong.
I'm too strong myself to say I need some help.
So he says then out of out of nowhere nowhere he said he wants to try to quit
again and he says i've been drinking a little bit too much now it's time for me to quit this
is september i've got to start drinking more sodas and juice sodas and juice okay that's what i do
and probably leave the beer and booze alone yeah yeah if you're gonna there's a choice between the
two it's hot out i need mountain dew yeah that's about instead of thunder chicken he says if i don't do it it's
not going to get done that's the way i look at it if you don't do it it can't get done i've got to
do it you can't do it for me well no shit thanks for the fucking thing here he is basically uh
by the way here's a reporter's we got to read you how he talks about him. Beaumont.
It's August.
It's noon and it's hot.
Avenue A in Beaumont's south side is bustling with lunchtime traffic running from air conditioned cars to air conditioned homes.
The heat doesn't bother Warren Wells, though.
He's relaxed.
His wiry frame is folded against the wall of an abandoned church.
Knees up.
A bottle of Thunderbird clutched between his hands.
Oh, my.
A cross dangles above his head do you know who this is this is warren wells and with a lot of a's and r's and l's
says jc who is wired on something far more potent than cheap wine he's got a boy with him he's got
his buddy with him uh it was being his hype man who's coked to the fucking gills, being like, this is Warren Wells, man.
The guy holding the thunder chicken?
Yep.
He said he is a first-class, world-class athlete.
He played in the Super Bowl.
Don't let anyone get nothing without paying.
Warren, hey, give me a shot of that, because he's telling the reporter, he told Warren,
don't talk to this guy unless he's paying you.
And then he says, hey, give me a shot of that,
trying to get his Thunderbird.
And they said, quote, J. jc grabs for wells's bottle until this point only only wells eyes communicate
his annoyance and embarrassment over the man sharing his corner that the reflexes that gave
wells a brilliant but short professional football career are too quick for the man he yanks the
bottle away these are the highlights we're getting from him now Him fucking juking out a coke head on the street who's trying to get his Thunderbird.
Good God.
They said he's on again, off again.
Mostly on.
Basically, and when he can't take care of himself or hold down a job.
When he's on, he can't take care of himself.
Can't hold down a job.
Can't do anything.
His sister-in-law, Concetta Wells, said, said quote he doesn't drink very much uh it doesn't
take but one and his personality is completely changed though and it's her and her son who's 28
help oversee his affairs they say uh she went to herbert high school with him and uh basically her
and her son control his bank account wash his clothes go pick him up off the streets when they
need to and take him inside dear god um yeah and he's got another guy his landlord go pick him up off the streets when they need to and take him inside dear god
um yeah and he's got another guy his landlord watches over him too uh wyron who's his nephew
says quote it's like having a child you have to do for him it's more or less like somebody would
who would have a child that is disabled and would always have to be paying attention
by him being disabled he always has to have supervision as far as everyday tasks.
Because he'll just go drink.
He doesn't view his uncle as a burden.
He's very proud of what he did.
He played in the Super Bowl.
He was a star.
And the most he ever made was $38,000.
And, yeah.
So, he also has a son as well.
Some man in his 50s.
Yeah.
Some guy who's now in his 50s.
Wyron also says he honorably served his country
he didn't try to pull strings to get the nfl to pull some strings to get him out of the service
he just went over there and did his time he went to alaska he went over there he went up there
he had three years of college he went over there over there he pointed as he did that
he had three years of college at texas southern that's a lot of accomplishment He pointed as he did that. I went over there. You know how it goes.
He had three years of college at Texas Southern.
That's a lot of accomplishment.
Sometimes, for weeks at a time, he wakes up at 5 a.m., they talk about, smokes a cigarette.
He specifies he smokes Winston's for some reason, and eats breakfast at McDonald's while he reads the paper.
And then he makes his way down Avenue A, across Florida Avenue, and up 4th up fort street often he will drink until wyron gets off work and brings him home um yeah he said this
is a great paragraph here though quote wells doesn't dwell on his achievements thunderbird
numbs the past the possibilities and the potential lost and lingering that's a good line uh but he
only drinks during the week he says he usually
usually doesn't drink on sundays out of respect for god he said yeah sundays are for the big man
they keep my shit together on sunday otherwise i lean against a church and drink thunderbird
while a crackhead tries to steal it yeah while a crackhead tries to fucking swipe it away
uh he says he gets sober for a week or a month at a
time but then he's uh his nephew says it's because he's always goes after everything with the same
amount of gusto he says quote he goes all the way he goes all out and everything he does from
drinking to when he was on the football field they used to call him war horse because he was
such a warrior on the football field and his fight and passion to go for it all that's just the same way he's been in some ways it's good in some ways that's bad it turns toward that way
it turns bad that way toward toward drinking so that makes sense so basically uh from 99
he continues this behavior he ends up with diabetes congestive heart failure, all sorts of problems. Finally, December 27, 2018, Warren dies from a heart attack and all sorts of other complications.
20 years of that.
At 76 years old, he made it.
That's when he used the shit out of himself.
That's a strong man.
Oh, he's a strong guy.
He could take it.
He really could.
His body is hardened.
He said, and Fred Belitnikoff says quote you can compare
him to anyone who's ever played the game he was that good some of the things i saw him do the
catches i saw him make were amazing he was a great friend he could be tough to get a smile out of
out of sometimes but he still had a great sense of humor it's sad to see another one of our friends
pass away so that's that can't get enough Warren Wells. I love him.
It's cool.
You can find old Warren Wells jerseys because he's an old Raider.
You can find there's a bunch of cool merchandise of like cool Warren Wells shit.
Even just his pictures are cool.
He's got like the 70s.
You know what I'm saying?
It's like he's got like a real shaft look to him like with his hair.
It's cool as fuck.
So check out Warren Wells.
And that is Warren Wells.
Wow, man.
It's a wild story for
somebody you never heard of right play idiot or asshole all the time which is i don't know an
idiot no is he an asshole he's certainly an asshole he's kind of an asshole he's not an
idiot no he's more of an asshole than an idiot definitely he knows that's too bad man that's
fucking sad but um i mean that's one of those stories that like there was no way to get around
that that was happening no matter what yeah it's just the way it was going.
It was a train.
Alcoholic.
Yeah.
He looking at this too.
Like I didn't know anything.
I never fucking knew.
I knew I'd heard of him as a player, but I didn't know any of this shit until I read
a book and they in passing just went and mentioned like Warren Wells.
Once he, you know, raped that lady and got stabbed for trying to turn out a prostitute
and all this type of shit.
And I was like, who is this?
Instant fucking instant look up on the phone.
I'm like, who's this gold mine?
Oh, my.
He's going on the list.
So that is Warren Wells.
If you did enjoy that show, you should tell the world about it.
Why not?
Please do get on Apple podcast.
Give us five stars.
It really does help.
Just say something.
It doesn't matter what.
Tell us.
I don't know. Tell us what your favorite cheap wine is it's probably Thunderbird probably
your Mad Dog 2020 that was our choice as teenagers butter's delicious Chardonnay I never had that
it's like $13 a bottle oh that's it's cheap and shitty that's not cheap though yeah you're right
it's not four dollars for yeah I'm talking about fucking mad dog and grape flavor yeah that's what we used
to drink in high school it's not alcohol you're talking about adult masquerading as yes yeah
you're talking about adult cheap wine not teenager cheap wine cheap pair it with dinner and not not
shit your pants by hey by splitting headache mashed potatoes so uh yeah that's that do that
follow us on social media we're at crime and sports on twitter and
facebook at small town murder on instagram and also you definitely want to get involved in patreon
yeah that's big stuff patreon.com slash crime and sports we got a lot going on over there uh this
week we have first of all backstage wrestler fights as a bonus episode that we just released Saturday, which is how crazy was that?
So great.
Brain damaged,
steroid riddled,
coked up guys that want to fight each other.
Oh,
by the way,
they're full of muscles.
So terrific.
It's amazing.
Check that out.
And then also for small town murders that which you'll have access to,
because you get access to everything,
every damn thing we make you,
uh,
we're going to do old timey murders,
which is one of my favorite things that we
do ever where we go back and read old newspaper accounts of horrific things going on in the late
1800s early 1900s utter disregard for human life is insane the matter of factness that they describe
things like oh my god useless shit's dead so much fun patreon.com slash crime and sports and also you'll get a shout out because you're
a goddamn producer and we we love you so you'll get a shout out jimmy you'll mispronounce your
name patreon.com slash crime and sports also if you just want to get your shout out be a producer
and you know just have some great karma and our undying love and affection you can do that over
at paypal as well using our email address crime and sports at gmail.com that said jimmy after all that i need good news i need to hear
a list of fine fine people who would never put me in the middle of a room and attack therapy me
until i was at half speed and got cut from the raiders jimmy hit me with them now this week's
executive producers are jordan bennett dr terea wants us to
know that doctors do listen uh nilu rafsanjani started she started a new business james and
in this fucking in a pandemic she's taking a risk that's amazing for her she's badass man
we like she really is she can do fucking all kinds of amazing things it's impressive good
good luck nilu uh other other executives this week are Frank Zecca, Brenda Wilson.
She donated in the memory of Matt Black.
Do you remember the family from Denver?
Yes.
Yeah.
Exactly who you're talking about.
Matt took his own life, and his whole family obviously was suffering,
and you guys unbelievably took care of them.
And Brenda wanted us to know and wanted you guys to know they were very appreciative.
And also, if you're struggling, fucking talk to somebody, anybody.
However.
It's awful.
Anybody's better than nobody.
Yeah, man.
It's brutal.
Talk to a cat, even.
Something.
Just try to get it out.
Honest.
Whatever's around.
Work hard at it.
Jesus.
It's brutal. Anyway, other it. Jesus, it's brutal.
Anyway, other producers this week, executives, are Melanie Blevins, slow-tugging Brent Jorgensen,
Keisha Brulette, Brule, and also Olivia Picote Valdevisio.
I think I got that right.
Picote?
Fuck, man.
I don't know.
I'm not good at this.
That's pretty good. Other producers this week are mona
floris who had a birthday i believe uh julie julie slamma had a birthday and her slamma
lamma ding dong told me also uh i love doug shark dangle riddell uh is gonna take his wife
to the san diego show uh if he knows what's good for him take my wife please to the san diego show
shark dangle uh also meg mega mega mega oh boy her name is meg uh mega liga lovich
oh i think i got that right wow nice no but she's concerned because rabbi shmulalovich
has not donated in a minute and she wants to make sure that the rabbi is okay i hope he's still on board also ashley veo judge smalls carl kirschner alex cpiella uh they had a birthday and uh kayla told
me so so alex happy birthday happy birthday and go bills that's that's their favorite team
they live in upstate i think so no choice then go bills also peyton meadows aaron olin liz vert vasquez happy birthday liz uh he's
been around since the beginning obviously uh james martyr thomas de mello jalen tross's cousin luke
is going in the air force fucking be careful please uh jennifer stevens it's awful i don't
know how you could do that i don't want anybody anybody getting hurt. I mean, hey, that's what I mean. Hats off to you.
Stay safe.
Serious.
Thomas Smith, Joe Bascom.
He has a new son.
Welcome to the jungle, Theo.
This world is a nightmare.
Congrats.
Christopher Palco.
Yes.
Campanielo?
Campanielo.
There you go.
Campanielo.
Campanielo?
All right.
That's it.
Steve Smith, John Daniel. Laura W. got Gerald Rubeck into this, so thank you, Laura. Thank you. there you go campagnolo all right that's it steve smith john daniel laura w got gerald
uh rubeck into this so thank you laura uh janice hill rob roberts bob bobs uh alex alexi alexi nap
dr jeff saverino and olivia de rienzo they they one of them graduated or both of them they got a
dog they got married and they got a mortgage the achievements are blowing my fucking mind that's a lot of good for you congrats a lot of lauren
beniche fatima a lot of commitment it really is wow lauren beniche fatima apollon apollon uh kyler
scoba scobo scobo He says there's a silent letter.
And for the life of me, can't figure out which one that is.
Alyssa Linnell, Trixie Hellcat, George Reese and Alleyway Jesus.
George lives in Boston and a fucking Jesus.
Some dude that looked just like Jesus, some homeless guy, wandered out of an alley and just started spouting unbelievable advice to him and then disappeared.
And I think George is using all the advice now.
Good for him.
That's either crazy or amazing.
I was going to say, he's either going to end up in a very great place
or spouting unsolicited advice from an alley.
Brenda Wilson, Damon Stevens, Jennifer Stevens, Melody McKenney,
Sharon Barea, Shannon Barea.
God damn it.
Yamin Theriot, you mean?
I don't. I'm unceriot. You mean Theriot?
I don't.
I'm uncultured.
I don't know.
Shelly Payton.
Meg Kendall.
June Sisko.
Bob Mesmer.
Skylar Bevan.
Grumpy Parasite.
Mitchell Griffin.
Nicole Moore.
Cole Blecha.
Blecha.
Nancy Word Weaver.
Natalie Leah.
Meredith Barone. Or Barone.
Rebecca Wilson.
I said that, I think. Matt Miller. STM, and Piat Crossover.
What's P-I-A-T?
I don't know that podcast.
P-I-A-T?
A-T.
I don't know.
H-T or A-T?
A. Like Apple.
Asshole.
I don't know.
P-I-A-T?
I don't know.
Mitzi Callahan, Brandi Wilson, Tabitha John.
What is it?
I don't know.
They keep asking for PSA Hate This Movie
But that's not the shorthand for it
That's not it
They're close to it
So I don't know what they're talking about
Tabitha John, Adrienne Brissett, Patty Bowman, Kareem Chavez
Kristen Krabistig
Nice
Jonathan Carter, Thomas Dragon
Nope, that's Dargan
That would be a dragon's
a cooler name you're thomas dragon now go by dragon forever go by that chance patterson chris
sather sarah burke heather mccoy aaron junge junge uh christina brightlow billy pike dixon my hands
yeah yeah you happy you proud of yourself did it. I'm sure it is.
Mary Claire, Dustin Smith, Heather Dujakovich.
Nope.
Dujakovich.
Chuck, Chuck, Chuck, Billy, CJ Dickmeyer, Leanne, Leanne Trombley, Justin McCarthy,
Charles Brown, Marcianne Ulysses Ramirez, Shannon Kincaid, Cindy Maddox, Travis Duncan,
Michelle Dusick, Matthew.
Nope.
That's William.
Muir.
What?
How did I get?
It doesn't matter.
Jess Dixon, Eddie Simmons, Catherine Davis, Haley with no last name, Morgan Hine, Chad
Springer, Carl Schramm, Brad Bryan, Ben Fadi, Alexander SC, Mariela Douglas, Matthew Tortellini,
Robin with no last name, Jeff Petronella.
That sounds like a candle.
Kyle Regan, Emma Triangolo, Letty with no last name, Sandra Aldridge, 15, E. Monacu.
Somebody just mashed on the keyboard and was fine with it.
Just put it all in.
Caitlin Feniza, Justin Monson, Jesse Hollenbeck, Carolyn Emerson, Chris Harnett, Matt Conway,
two, hit them, quit them.
Oh, boy, don't do that.
Connor McGough, Yvonne Holden, Fiona Kay, Jeffrey Antonik, Ashley Webb, Jill with no
last name, Lily McGalivary. Galvray.
Galvray.
Trevor Cozart.
Pat Crossan.
Fallon Grice.
Matthew Chaney.
Daria.
Daria.
Daria.
Kurt.
Brian Fields.
Connor with no last name.
Tracy with no last name.
Mekok.
Mok.
Mokik.
Mykok.
I don't know what that is.
Mekik.
Somebody's Mok. Bobby Graves.
Mason Rowe. Tempest. Sean Harrigan. is. Meekick. Somebody's back. Bobby Graves. Mason Rowe.
Tempest.
Sean Harrigan.
Yep.
City Bowring.
Andrew Pettigrew.
Matthew.
Nope, that's Maggie.
Why do I keep saying Matthew?
Maggie Regalia.
Kelly Petrie of the Petrie of the Dish Fortune.
Oh, wow.
Melissa Weller.
Blessings.
And also Emily Gold.
Nick with no last name.
Allie McLaughlin.
Maciek S. Suzanne Burns. Whoa, and also Emily Gold. Nick with no last name. Allie McLaughlin, Maciek S., Suzanne Burns.
Whoa, boy.
Siri Alto, Marshall Arduin, David Newell, Christopher Dry, Mark Rainwater, Billy Bradfute,
Quabian Barber, Barbrae, Quabian.
That's a badass name. Scott Lippman, Lindsay Gofina uh samantha fuller it's courtney wesley
andrew wardrop rm ashley viatree uh sarah nelson jesse bennett chris knight samantha london chris
knight what two chris knights two different ones both of you or one of you twice yeah probably
it's probably true either are probably right uh sophia. Sophia Silva. Chase with no last name. Kevin Campbell.
Colin Forrester-Hore.
Ho-Hore?
Oh, boy.
Susan Durchelts.
Cory.
What happened?
Cory Zerens.
Veronica Mathis.
Madison McGraw.
Alan Sperling.
Priscilla Diaz.
Lacey Marino.
Sarah Melvin.
Cornucopia.
Cornucopia? Oh, boy. Klondike Music Company, Ainsley Guertin,
Shaylee Shane, Harlow, Joanna Dennison, Jeremiah Jameson,
Jess with no last name, Jason McQueen, June Bailey, Don S., Zach Alferman, Patty, oh boy, Milardo, Griffin Talbot, Brad Davis, John Dyer, Annika
Scovel, Michael Subject, is that right?
That can't be right.
I didn't write Subject.
Allison Bierman, Christina Barras, Jordan Beach, Nicholas with no last name, Randy Yor,
Xander Motz, Sandra Yost, Aiden Bianc, Blanco, Nick of Time Designs, D. No Mayor,
Denomiar, Denomiar, that's not right either, Tanner Wagaman, Kyle Childress, William Moore,
Megan with no last name, Terrence McCarthy, Sherry Purcell, Eric Curtis, Cooley, what,
Kylie, Maynard Standard, I couldn't.
No way.
Oh, it is Kylie.
The Y and the U are right next to each other.
Tess Hupp, Nick Nurenberg, E.W. Calivari, Amelia Wilson, Matt Hutchinson, Telly Hickey, Elizabeth Greenup, Kayla Moore, Amanda Rubello, Amanda Hawley, Isabella Quintana ryan millershacky christy borrows and also heather
yarbrough you guys are terrific thank you so so much thank you everybody so an immense amount
honestly uh consider yourself a tech therapist there you go we really we we badgered you um hope
you enjoy it i hope you're enjoying all the bonus content because we really love hearing about it
yeah and uh we go hard for you we do and you get tweeted us whatever you got to. I hope you're enjoying all the bonus content because we really love hearing about it. Yeah.
We go hard for you.
We do.
And you tweeted us whatever you got to do.
If you got ideas for bonus episodes,
something you think would be a good idea,
both were really open to hearing those because if it's a good idea,
we never thought of it,
shit, let's hear it.
So do that.
And Jimmy, where could they find you
to maybe tell you something like that?
You can find me on the internet
at WismanSucks,
W-H-I-s-m-a-n
sucks on twitter and instagram where are you i am at jimmy p is funny you can find me on there and
you'll find me around i don't know just you can google us and you'll find us that's all worth it
it's really we're the two guys leaning against the church with a bottle of thunder chicken
that says come find us we're in a beaum church. The difference between us and him is that, well, here, have a sip.
Come on over.
Live from the side of a church in Beaumont, Texas.
We will see you next week.
Bye.
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