Crime in Sports - #318 - The Waterboy Lays Pipe - The Sensitiveness of J.R. Smith

Episode Date: August 30, 2022

This week, we look at the wild, crazy life of a man who was trained since before birth for basketball greatness. He also loves to put his foot in his mouth, should stay off social media, for ...his own good, and he should absolutely, positively NEVER drive a car. From a tragic, and awful accident, with criminal implications, to fights with fans at 4am. He has it all! Despite all of this, he's pretty likable, just don't ask him for a picture, on the street, or your phone may end up thrown onto the next block!!Hook on to a superstar & ride the success wave, make the strangest social media post about 9/11 in history, and throw a bowl of soup at a coach with J.R. Smith!!Check us out, every Tuesday! We will continue to bring you the biggest idiots in sports history!!  Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman  Donate at... patreon.com/crimeinsports or with paypal.com using our email: crimeinsports@gmail.com  Get all the CIS & STM merch at crimeinsports.threadless.com  Go to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things CIS & STM!!  Contact us on... twitter.com/crimeinsports crimeinsports@gmail.com facebook.com/Crimeinsports instagram.com/smalltownmurderSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Prime members, you can listen to Crime and Sports early and ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the app today. Discover all the best in audiobooks, podcasts, and originals featuring authentic Canadian voices and celebrity talent, like Brendan Fraser and Luke Kirby's latest sci-fi adventure, The Downloaded. A first listen is waiting for you when you start your free trial at audible.ca. on the Mr. Ballin Podcast, now available wherever you get your podcasts, you'll hear strange, dark, and mysterious stories about inexplicable encounters, shocking disappearances, true crime cases, and everything in between. So go listen to Mr. Ballin Podcast, Strange, Dark, and Mysterious Stories on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts. Hello and welcome to Crime and Sports! Yay! Yay!
Starting point is 00:01:25 Yay indeed, Jimmy. Yay indeed. My name is James Petrigallo. I'm here with my co-host. I am Jimmy Wissman. Thank you folks so much for joining us today on another crazy wild insane edition of Crime and Sports. We're hot lately. Hot. The show is on fire because we have just done the weirdest like prescient i don't know what's going on but it's two weeks in a row something happened we predict yeah we release along right with the show we release an akib talib episode on a monday and by saturday he's
Starting point is 00:02:01 embroiled in a a fight that led to a murder that his brother and he was the one who started. And it's been getting worse and worse as it goes. Now he's gone from Thursday Night Football because of this whole thing. Because video shows that he's the one who started the fight, of course, which I said exactly when it happened. I was like, oh, he would know 100% started that. If he's involved in it, he fucking started it. That's just Aqib Dhalib. So that's crazy and then we do john hope hope hope hope hope hope whatever the fuck his name is
Starting point is 00:02:32 we talk about him and then like the day it comes out some other guy gets in trouble for fucking bum fingering what's going on check in the oil what is happening this is crazy so and at that time when we did the show nobody ever fingered assholes like it was just one guy we did it the next right then like we gave like he forgot about it listen to the show a new a new finishing move yeah and he was like oh that's the finger of doom that's the fingers before the finger of doom is my new finishing move that's perfect unbelievable it's been crazy so hopefully this week doesn't spark some terrible thing to happen to this guy who's because this is a very akib talib like story oh so next week who knows there could be a gunplay involved we have no fucking
Starting point is 00:03:21 idea we'll get into it though very quickly at the top of the show. Thanks for everything you do for us. Thanks for your reviews and everything like that. Throw a review up if you can, whatever app you're listening on. Five stars. That's very helpful. Head over to ShutUp and GiveMeMurder.com today. Get all of your merchandise there. Tons of stuff up from
Starting point is 00:03:40 both shows, Crime and Sports and Small Town Murder. And get your tickets to live shows, of course Sports and Small Town Murder, and get your tickets to live shows, of course, especially, I think, September 10th at the Pabst might be sold out now for Small Town Murder. Evidently, it is. Evidently, it's sold out. People can still return tickets, though,
Starting point is 00:03:55 so they'll pop open, check it out. I mean, you can still try, but we were pretty happy about that. But September 23rd, Tampa, Florida, at the Tampa Improv, two shows in one night. Next night, we are in Orlando on the 24th at the Orlando Improv doing two shows that night too. And those are both in Tampa and in Orlando. They're two different shows each night.
Starting point is 00:04:16 So if you go to Tampa and Orlando, you'll see the same shows. But if you go to Tampa and see both shows, you'll see different shows. Same with Orlando. So there you go to Tampa and see both shows, you'll see different shows. Same with Orlando. So there you go. There is that. Patreon.com slash Crime and Sports is where you get all of the wonderful bonus stuff. Man, the bonus stuff has been very good lately. You really want to hear about it.
Starting point is 00:04:36 And this week you can catch up. You get, by the way, $5 or above. You get everything. The whole back catalog, it's over 100 episodes. Plenty of stuff to binge on. And not only that, every other week you're going to get two new episodes, one crime and sports, one small town murder. This week we have to continue for crime and sports and get on to Sex Scandals Part 2. Oh, yes.
Starting point is 00:04:57 It was too deep. We talked about Brett Favre and a couple things. Then we got into the Duke College Athleteke college athlete fuck list and we it was too deep we got it we'll finish that up we got some guy who was banging his sister-in-law a soccer player which is crazy tony parker uh fucking brett barry's wife there's a whole lot going on here in this story there's a lot and then small town murder we're gonna talk about why does it make me laugh so much because it's hilarious jimmy pps and weewees are funny that's why we can't help it boobies and weewees and you know we're children at heart that's why it's funny and this is like yay super
Starting point is 00:05:37 private stuff that's hilarious shit we shouldn't know yes he. He's got a big pee pee, she said. That's us. We're small, pathetic children, Jimmy. That's why. So for small town murders bonus, we're going to talk about, first of all, that new Zodiac Killer documentary. What the hell's the name of it? It's on Netflix. The one where it's got the guy's face that looks-
Starting point is 00:06:02 Most Dangerous Game or some shit like that? No, that's a bad movie with iced tea from the 90s. Yeah, with Rutger Hauer. Yeah, with Rutger Hauer. That's different. But it's something like that. Yeah, Most Dangerous Something. Either way, it's a guy who thinks that his father, his long-lost father, is actually the Zodiac Killer.
Starting point is 00:06:19 And he writes a book. And the way he puts it together is very compelling until you actually look at the stuff. And then the whole thing falls apart like in the documentary you know by the end of it they're like well i mean i don't know was he doing it on purpose or not and we'll talk about the current batch of who they think the zodiac killer actually is and kind of uh you know kind of the later stages of this investigation because it's very interesting and i've read a lot about it so let's let's talk about it you're're never going to know, right? Who knows?
Starting point is 00:06:46 Patreon.com slash crime and sports. Maybe we'll find out. Who knows? Tune in and find out. We're going to crack the case. That's it right there. And you'll get a shout out at the end of the show. Jimmy's going to mispronounce your name.
Starting point is 00:06:57 That said, damn it, let's get to this. Let's get into it. It's a lot of crazy, of course. Back to the NBA this week. How terrific. We love the basketball episodes. it's a lot of crazy, of course. Back to the NBA this week. How terrific. We love the basketball episodes. They're a lot of fun. And this week we're going to talk about J.R. Smith, Jimmy.
Starting point is 00:07:13 You know J.R. Smith. Oh, everybody does because he's been in the finals. He's a fucking meme, for Christ's sake. He's a meme. Real name, and this is not surprising at all. This is the least surprising thing about this episode. Real name, Earl Joseph Smith III, a junior's junior, Jimmy. Why are we calling him junior?
Starting point is 00:07:33 J, and he's not even the first born. I don't know what's going on. His initials aren't even J-R. Nope, they're not J-R. I think that's fucked up. Who's he hiding from? And his initials are J.R.r. like it's representing two words not jr which would be it maybe just that's like junior but we call him jr no no no no jr
Starting point is 00:07:53 there is try he's got one j joseph that's a j his middle name the r there's not an r in no r there's an r in the word earl out of his entire name there's only one r and it doesn't start a fucking any names i'm so mad at him the whole time i'm doing research i'm so fine hoping i find the thing that says why he does j.r. dot maybe that'll come up and it never comes up. And I'm like, how's that not the first question you're asking? Earl Joseph, why are you J.R.? The third. God damn it. This is terrible journalism.
Starting point is 00:08:32 Was his dad, Junior, just really jacked about calling somebody? He loved being called Junior, so he wanted to call somebody else Junior? Well, his dad is a Junior. His dad is Earl Joseph Smith, Junior. He's got to love the part that he's a Junior, so he wanted to call himith junior so that's he's gotta he's gotta love the part that he's a junior so he wants to call him junior too but he's not a junior that's the thing he's just he's a third so i this whole thing is perplexing see what i mean i'm already so angry when we start out with the third who goes by junior who doesn't even have but there's not junior it's perplexing and mind
Starting point is 00:09:05 boggling and you know that person's gonna be a fuck up you just know it it's it was predetermined predestined you ruined this boy because he's always confused from day one it's like otis nixon he's confused from day one and doesn't know understand why he's so fucking ugly well that he doesn't jr smith isn't isn't ugly but uh terrible looking otis smith otis nixon really had to he had a lot to ponder with that face to look in the mirror and go why this name for this face he had to look in the mirror every day and go why do i look 65 when i'm 23 how did this happen to me what the fuck is going on they named him otis jr nixon jr to confuse the shit out of him yeah so he distracts from his stupid face good god he's like why do i look just like my grandmother
Starting point is 00:09:51 right now why do we look the same age i'm 11 i'm this is not right yet i go to bingo and they deal me in i don't get it they just they add me a card and a stamper and that's all there is no questions asked i just see a little 11 year old here you go sir here you go ma'am here you go ma'am how to go with the oncologist? I'm in the fifth grade, damn it. I got suspended today. Oh, man. Earl, Earl, Earl.
Starting point is 00:10:33 Jesus, J.R. Smith. Unbelievable. So right away, J.R. is comedy right off the bat. Poor bastard. We haven't even gotten to his birthday yet, and it's already a lot. It's already a lot to take in and figure out. Date of birth, September 9th, 1985 is when he's born. No kidding. So yeah, coming up on his birthday here.
Starting point is 00:10:50 Happy birthday. It's my daughter's birthday. Happy birthday, Earl. My daughter's is the seventh. That's the same deal. He's born in Freehold, New Jersey. His parents are Earl Jr., of course. And Ida is his mom.
Starting point is 00:11:02 He's got brothers as well. He's got an older brother named kenny who's a really good basketball player who we'll talk about and he's got a younger brother named chris who's also a really good basketball player who will come up as well later on and then he's got a younger younger brother named demetrius who plays football for monmouth university later on none of them are good enough to disappoint lebron in the finals uh no chris is good enough to disappoint knicks fans though so that's oh is that right for one season and two games we'll see so earl here he's born he's born in actually they lived in millstone new jersey he's born in free
Starting point is 00:11:37 holy that's where the hospital is but he's millstone new jersey's where he grew up here his father is a mason and owns his own masonry company so he does that hard working son of a bitch that's tough work man hard hard working guy but his father does real we'll talk about it his his father laid the groundwork well laid it see what i mean he smoothed it out he really paved the way he really paved the way he really laid the stone path for him he laid the yellow brick road um his mother's a homemaker just uh you know she's a stay-at-home mom and with four kids it makes sense and they they met at a high school basketball game in 1982 where earl was playing so that's how they met as
Starting point is 00:12:17 well their grandfather uh jr's grandfather earl senior i guess guess. Earl I here. The one. The one. He moved to Millstone, which at the time was just very farming at the time that they moved there. He found work as a mason and he became really good at laying bricks and concrete and doing all
Starting point is 00:12:40 that kind of shit. Now, his father, Earl Jr., I guess. Earl Jr. Sr. Jr. Jr. JR's father, Jr. Sr. eating doing all that kind of shit now um his father earl junior i guess earl junior senior junior second jr's father junior senior yeah earl the second he played briefly played college basketball at tyler community college in texas there um and he also played at monmouth university and then he ended up starting a family here in Millstone dropping out of school um but he ended up doing what his father did he became a mason and he started his started his own company big girl big girl masonry masonry big girl gonna lay you need them bricks laid big girls here for
Starting point is 00:13:19 you I'll trust big girl to lay the bricks no No matter what the business. If it's named for Big Earl, I'll buy you tires, Big Earl. Yeah, maybe not childcare, but otherwise. No, no, no. I'm not coming to your OBGYN practice, Big Earl. No, no, but I'll eat your corned beef sandwich probably. I'll eat that. Big Earl's urology. No, thank you.
Starting point is 00:13:43 No, no, no. I don't want Big Earl's urology. Definitely, if he's going up the no no no i don't want big earls urology definitely if he's nothing if he's going up the ass i definitely don't want big earl big earl proctology is there a tiny tim proctology maybe little tiny frail hands somebody like that maybe is there a there's an opening on thursday james come on i don't think I'm coming through with Big Earl. I'm Big Earl. My schedule's wide open. I'm Big Earl.
Starting point is 00:14:11 Do I have openings? Yes, I do. I'm Big Earl, and I want to put my hand up your ass. And he points, and you go, oh, my God, that finger's like a... Big Earl and... Shit. It's like an Italian sausage. Your asshole's going to be as open as my schedule. Oh, baby. It's going to be working. It's going to be as open as my schedule. Oh, baby.
Starting point is 00:14:26 It's going to be working. It's going to be working. Big Earl knows how to work it. Don't worry. So Big Earl's masonry business grew. It had 50 people working for him at one time. He had a big one fleet of trucks. It's a big business.
Starting point is 00:14:45 It really is. He won contracts to build a couple of Best Buy stores and sports authority stores. Wow. Which back then that was. Remember those? Yeah. Remember when they existed? When you could go buy a fucking bat somewhere?
Starting point is 00:14:57 There was so much brick. Yo, everywhere. Yeah. That's what I mean. The whole front of that fucking thing was brick. Everything. Yeah. It was all stone.
Starting point is 00:15:03 It was that big stone face. They were like QTs. Like they were one of the one of was brick. Everything, yeah. It was all stone. It was that big stone face. They were like QTs. They were one of the fucking Kentucky Fried Chicken. When it closes down and something opens and it's in its place, you know what that is. Yeah, you know that was a Best Buy. Best Buy, though, for sure. You definitely know what that is. You know Wendy's because they used to have this.
Starting point is 00:15:18 Oh, I got news to break to you. Do you remember the Best Buy at Paradise Valley Mall? Yes. Everybody's been there a million times, right? I was there in November of last year, actually. It is closed, James. Can you believe that closed? Actually, I can, because when I went there, it was very specific.
Starting point is 00:15:35 I was staying in a hotel for a week with my son, and the Wi-Fi was terrible at this fucking hotel, so I needed a Verizon hotspot thing. Air card, yeah. My own internet thing. And I needed it for the road anyway. I had been procrastinating buying it because I'm cheap. And I was like, you know what? This will be good for everybody. I went there.
Starting point is 00:15:56 I stood there. I'm trying to spend $200, right? And I stood there for so long. Oh, my God, it hurts. I want to spend $200. I'm dying to. So I stand there for so long, and these two employees just sit there and ignore me, basically. So I finally walk over, and the one's at like a desk with a computer.
Starting point is 00:16:20 It's like a see-through desk. Yeah, a little monitor. With a computer up there on it and the other one's talking there and i stood in front of i stood like in between them and i was like hi you know very polite and i was like how you doing i was just wondering if i could help some if you could help me with something and i need to spend 200 please the employee behind the monitor goes can you step out from behind the register and i went what are you talking about there's no register she's sitting at a desk at a computer i'm like i'm what are you talking about what the fuck are you talking about you need me to
Starting point is 00:16:50 go to make you take this money and then i was like i want to buy that one of those and she's like and i was like oh my god and as we walked out i told my son i go this is why these stores are closing this is why this right here because i'm sure there's some employees who don't suck and that sucks that they're gonna lose their jobs but holy fuck that's why i'm not doing that anymore i'm buying this shit online now and that's what i'm talking about i needed it that day is the only reason i went there and then i said never again and i haven't been to a best buy since and that's why so good i think i think best buy is floundering hard i don't think well i don't't think they're doing well company-wide.
Starting point is 00:17:26 Because that used to be one of the biggest stores. Well, yeah. When you could charge $20 for a DVD, that was going to be a... But now, why would I go there when I can just... CDs and DVDs drove that company. And now it's fucking over. How'd you like to come here and spend 20% more than you need to? But it's the experience. You come in. We're wearing blue shirts wearing blue shirts why not just do it can we ignore the shit out of
Starting point is 00:17:49 you we'll ignore you you don't get frustrated enough buying online you can get what you need quickly look stuff up we really want you to stand there and get the experience of being in a best buy it takes a while well it turned into like a uh uh it doesn't matter no sorry i sidetracked that's a phoenix very local phoenix but there's a point i complain the the front of a best buy you know when it's that the brick there gave and the design of it so if he's doing that that's big fucking money that's big money also they're doing senior assisted living centers and really all sorts of shit, local businesses. It's a very prominent business here, doing very well.
Starting point is 00:18:28 Now, right away, this is very much a Todd Marinovich situation when it comes to from the crib, it's like little JR is going to play basketball. There's no choice in the matter. His brother played basketball. Father played basketball. Twice in the matter, his brother played basketball, father played basketball, and his father feels like he didn't quite have the reins tight enough with the older brother, and we'll find out what happened with Kenny. So he's going to fix all the mistakes of his life and Kenny's with young JR, and that's what he's going to do.
Starting point is 00:18:57 So it was right away he had – there was instead of – he had no monitor. They set up little Tykes basketball hoops around his thing. So all he saw was basketballs from the very beginning. Yeah. Which I mean, a newborn isn't going to shoot any hoops. Their outside game is weak. Yeah. That's not doing anything for.
Starting point is 00:19:17 No handles at that age. None. He's trying to do some subliminal messages for the early. That's what it is. The mother, Ida,ida she said i thought it was all right she said i thought uh she said i thought i thought earl knew uh earl knew what he was doing he had a plan so she said it must all work out in the end here she said so um they said before like he basketball next to him in the crib from a newborn. Just here's a full-size NBA basketball that you can't possibly do anything with.
Starting point is 00:19:48 There's no way you can do a thing with this. Earl said, quote, from the moment I saw JR, no, before I even laid eyes on the boy, I knew he'd be something special. Why? Because I was going to force him to be no matter what. That's what I want. Thank fuck for Earl. JR ended ended up being six foot six or else he would have been really disappointed if earl was five he's six six jr wow it's a great play it's a great height for a ball player i mean there's a lot of versatility there if he was
Starting point is 00:20:15 five nine he would have really had a had a what was the days a tougher road to hoe here you know it wouldn't have been as easy so earl said you know he doesn't even care he knows you're thinking he's an overbearing kind of stage dad type and he said that's right god damn it he said he was he resigned himself to being that sports parent an obsessive one and he didn't care he said quote i don't care what other people say i'm going to do whatever i can to help my son make his dreams come true his dreams come true. His dreams come true. That he had before he was born. He's had these dreams a long time.
Starting point is 00:20:49 That he had since he stopped playing college at Tyler. I mean, since he's a baby. He said, I'll be the bad guy if I have to. I'll be the bad guy for my son. So, yeah. And even JR said, quote, my dad always tells me I was born with a basketball in my hand. And he said that he was really teaching him when he was five. He was really teaching him plays and, you know, the intricacies of the game at five. Really? That's when he was really showing him what's up. He said when he was five, he was already so big that he had to play with the seven year olds. And Earl said and they wouldn't let him play because they were worried he'd get hurt so i had to write that he was seven so he'd just say yeah no he's seven and nobody would question it so he said he taught him pick and rolls and shit like that at like five six seven years old he's teaching him pick and roll he said
Starting point is 00:21:39 quote i taught him at five years old he comprehended at six and mastered it at eight oh my god i don't believe that for a second he's john stockton fucking rolling with with malone at eight yeah he's that's mastered it here um he says that um one day he had a bit of a problem here he was a little pissed off he said that one day earl senior junior noticed that chris and jr had shit loads of candy oh all this candy on him so where the fuck do you two get candy i didn't give you any goddamn money where are you getting money from he's so in little shits he got him to admit it and he had to uh take him he took him back to the store made him give all the candy back really oh that's so embarrassing made him do all do all that shit and got them in big time trouble.
Starting point is 00:22:28 Earl took no shit from these kids. I mean, if they acted up in the house, fucking video games got taken away, put in the closet for a month. It was like, they're not fucking around with these kids. But he's also a rich kid. Earl talks about making his first million when JR was a little kid. What? Yeah, he grew up very comfortable. Dad had a million dollars. Oh, yeah oh yeah no they were doing real well real fucking well um he said he told him
Starting point is 00:22:53 that you know as a kid he goes i'm a i'm a mason here but you could you know never know what the hell you could do it could be more than this even you know and even though this is good uh he earl said quote i wish my dad could have been there for me the way I've been able to been there for JR. My dad didn't have time to stay on me about playing the game right. He was too busy working hard. So, yeah, because his dad didn't own his own business. He was an employee. This guy has 50 people working for him.
Starting point is 00:23:18 So he can say on Saturday, I don't go to that job. I go to my kid's basketball practice instead. And I have people doing that job for me, making less than that job pays. Exactly. Therefore, I can make money for sitting and teaching my son a pick and roll when he's seven. So is this good for a kid, by the way?
Starting point is 00:23:37 We've asked that a lot. Is that good? It's a common question. Is that all right? Should you give your kids kidney gummies when they're a baby in the crib, like Todd Marinovich's dad? Should you teach them the pick and roll at five and make sure they master it by seven? Is that necessary?
Starting point is 00:23:52 Oftentimes, letting them go their own way and find their path works better. That's the thing. And so I found some articles from some doctors about this, pediatricians and pediatric psychology people, and they're talking about how this works. Here's a guy named Thomas Rowland. He's an American Academy of Pediatrics committee guy who released a study, this was in the late 90s, on the dangers of setting out to raise a sports star. He released a study about that. And basically they're concerned about intensive sports play that begins at age five or before.
Starting point is 00:24:28 Like that's a little too – like that's almost your – anything you do, make a kid start doing before five, they don't even remember starting to do it. So it's just like a habit that you do. You know what I mean? Always. So it's kind of – you're forcing. That's a force at that point they never had a choice in the matter is what they're saying so so they're saying and at that point if you know you begin that at age five and it becomes where their whole life is oriented to is only to the
Starting point is 00:24:58 sports and towards success and victory they said you know that's not the greatest thing in the world you know it just isn't um they said quote if it's in if greatest thing in the world you know it just isn't um they said quote if it's in if it's in the kids best interests i'm all for it is what the doctor says but when you've got when you've got prep schools involved and sneaker companies hanging around uh you don't know what's going to go into things so yeah then it becomes unhealthy for a kid to have all these weird pressures at 15 years old weird pressures too because it's it's a different thing if it's a weird pressure for athletics because there's a lot of kids now that have that make fucking millions of dollars on tiktok and youtube
Starting point is 00:25:37 and shit and but they've like that's what their business is oriented to that's that was the they're not making content because they're artists and they can't wait to get this art out. No, they're making content. They figured out Patrick Mahomes brother and they can't grow. Yeah. Or there's some kid that figured out the algorithm and they know what videos had. Yeah. That's all it is.
Starting point is 00:25:59 It's not there's no art to it. There's no anything to it. That's why bullshit as we heard from, put it this way, when you go see, this is very quickly. If you go see a live something, a live show, make sure the people that you're seeing do that thing. And they're not like we heard from comedy clubs that we were with our live show people. They, when we first go to places places they hear a podcast and they're like oh jesus this is gonna be boring these assholes then at the end of the show we get like the
Starting point is 00:26:30 security guys coming up going that shit was fucking hilarious i didn't realize that shit was so funny it's like yeah we're comedians that's why we know how to do a show for an hour and a half we're not people who aren't comedians that did a podcast and went well we can make more money doing a live show too and then they go sit on a fucking stage with their thumbs up their ass because they didn't spend 10 years performing to get there. You know what I mean? So that's not what's going on. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:53 Anyway, that's kind of what you get with the TikTok thing is we found out that there are TikTok people who sell a room out in five minutes and then they go there and they're supposed to do an hour and they do 10 minutes and no one likes it and then they leave because they don't know what to do because they don't have the performing experience to know how to get through that whereas if me or you yeah ran out of something and had an hour to kill we'd be like well if i'm fucking i guess i gotta do this for an hour it's just what you do on stage you have to be able to find comfort and silence because you're building something for that moment in that if there's silence and you don't want silence or you're don't you don't know what silence does you're fucked and it takes a long time on stage it takes
Starting point is 00:27:35 a long time on stage to understand you're having a conversation and there can be silence so that's what i mean that's obviously neither here nor there with jr smith but be careful the other point is like pushing a child into something at a young age is you your memories don't don't function until later but what you do remember then is fucking trauma and and uh situations you shouldn't be in pressure the pressure right yeah the negativity of it that's the only thing your brain remembers because it's it's a defense mechanism. It's helping you understand and cope with true. No, it's true. The point with the tick tock and the YouTube kids is they're they're business people at a young age. What I meant is they're not artists. They're business people. So they're trying to build a business. So they're more equipped for sponsor things and making decisions business wise than a a 16-year-old kid who's an athlete who their whole mind has just been learning the pick and roll. Put the ball in the hoop.
Starting point is 00:28:30 Put the ball in the hoop, do this, do that, and then you're putting a whole other world on top of them. And then you're like, what about an agent and tennis shoes? It would be like taking the TikTok kid out of the business world, taking him to the basketball court and telling him to run a complicated basketball drill, but he doesn't know even what that means. No, go do this and that. He'd go, I don't know what that means. Well, no, you don't because you've never been to basketball practice. Whereas J.R. Smith, you could tell him, and he'd go, oh, yeah, and he'd do it in two seconds,
Starting point is 00:28:54 but he wouldn't know about a business deal. It's a different thing. So anyway, they say this is one of the – this is the guy again, a physician. When you look at these statistics of how many of these kids are being pushed, who are really going to make it? It's well under one percent. Is it worth the risk? I mean, for J.R. Smith, it is. Wait till I tell you what his career earnings are.
Starting point is 00:29:15 You go, holy shit. He would have never made that lay in stone. I'll tell you that much. So it's a big deal. A tennis player here. Here's Andrea Yeager is her name. She was playing tennis from like 10. And she says, it might be bringing out an enormous talent.
Starting point is 00:29:32 But how do you know there's not another one in there? She said, maybe your kid would be happier as an artist. So if you see the kid's a prodigy at something, maybe they're a prodigy at it. But maybe that's not what they want to do for the rest of their life. Maybe that's not their passion, what they love. Yeah, just because they're great at it, do they have to do it? And that's a whole other question. That's a five easy pieces thing in the Jack Nicholson movie where he decides to work on a freight ship instead of, never mind.
Starting point is 00:30:00 Instead of singing whatever the fuck. His family is a musical pedigree. It's a whole long story. Anyway, but that's kind of what it is fuck. His family is a musical pedigree. It's a whole long story. Anyway, but that's kind of what it is here. Like, who knows? You know what I mean? But JR, no.
Starting point is 00:30:14 He's basketball all the way. Earl said when JR was around 12 is when Earl made his first million. He said he started dabbling in racehorses after that. Is that right? Yeah, JR is having a pretty easy life here. Basketball and rich parents. racehorses after that is that right yeah jr is having he's got a pretty easy life here basketball and rich parents racehorse imagine that racehorses fucking i don't know wow that is yeah racehorses unbelievable he said a friend approached him about going in on a standard bred named we will see and uh what we will see is its name well we will see but a what a standard bread
Starting point is 00:30:46 that's the kind of horse does that mean it's a type of horse it is i get it but i don't know what that means i don't either no idea that's what he said he said a horse that nobody i'm not a horse guy a horse that nobody wanted he said i bet it had a big dick though i bet it did sure that he said it was 30 grand for the horse earl earl put up 7500 and he said the horse raced for five years before retiring with career earnings of 2.5 million dollars for 7500 bucks that's 7500 investment yeah so that's a he made a good chunk on 7500500 bucks. Yeah, sure did. And he said eventually his stable ballooned to 14 horses. 14 fucking horses. That's wild.
Starting point is 00:31:28 He said he'd take JR to job sites to show him the ropes, but JR didn't like working with his hands at all. He wasn't going to be a stonemason. And JR said, working like that in the summer or in the winter, it wasn't for me. Not bad. It was 68 degrees, maybe, but not out of gold. Winter in New Jersey, laying bricks? Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:31:49 Oh, my God. I've seen it. It looks rough. The wait is over. So far, you're not losing. The only thing you're losing is my patience. Quickly, I see that. Bing!
Starting point is 00:32:00 The queen of the courtroom is back. I didn't do anything. You wouldn't know the truth if it came up and slapped you in the face. I see he's not intimidated by anything. I can fix that. New cases. She wanted to fight me. Leave her alone.
Starting point is 00:32:18 Okay, so, um... This is not a so. This is a period. Classic Judy. Did you sleep with her? Yes, Your Honor. You is a period. Classic Judy. Did you sleep with her? Yes, Your Honor. You married his cousin. His brother. That's not him.
Starting point is 00:32:30 Yes, ma'am. I would make a beeline for the door. The Emmy Award winning series returns. How did I know that? I have a crystal ball in my head. It's an all new season. It's streaming. You can say anything.
Starting point is 00:32:44 Judy Justice. Only on Freebie. Taylor Swift is soaring high. Her every move captured in the news cycle and devoured by her devoted fans. She's broken billboard records and made Grammys history, not to mention becoming a billionaire in the process. But along the way, Taylor has had to wage war, first by taking on a very powerful, very famous manager, Scooter Braun, and then by going up against the biggest live events company, Ticketmaster. Hi, I'm David Brown, the host of Wondery's show Business Wars. We go deep into some of the biggest
Starting point is 00:33:22 corporate rivalries of all time. And in our latest season, Taylor Swift will shake up not only the music business, but Hollywood and the NFL. Follow Business Wars wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen ad-free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. So he said he never wanted to be a contractor. He wanted to make it to the NBA. And his father says, if you don't want to work with your hands you better make it there then so yeah that's what you got jr said he never fit in in school he said that um he was bullied all the time before he knew that bullying was even a thing he said people fucked with him he said in the fifth grade he got assigned to a special education math class and so his friends would stop at the door and point in the window and make fun of him sure yeah so yeah hey dumb dumb yeah hey look at you you're in that guy look at hey stupid hey look
Starting point is 00:34:10 where's jr there he is hey look at him so brutal yeah that's brutal these are his friends picking on him so that's the people that like him these are the yeah these are the people that you trust and want to talk to so he said it would continue in the hallway and people would pick on him and he said he would go home and cry to his mother that's how that's how he would handle it basically and um he or jr said i never wanted to make anyone feel like that so he said he couldn't you know he didn't want to be mean to anybody else he said even at that age i knew it was wrong but i hated being in there hated it so he said that he became withdrawn and wouldn't seek out new friends at that point and basically just stayed
Starting point is 00:34:52 home with his brothers and cousins and that's what he was doing he said i really didn't have childhood friends i kept to myself just hanging out he had friends and then when he was playing on these teams his teammates or his friends when they played basketball but these are all like the really good kids they're not just a bunch of kids from one area they're kids from everywhere who play really well so your friend might live 60 miles away from you so there's not much you can do with that when you're 12 club sports put a gap between friends absolutely local sports will bring them all together when you're 12 60 miles away they might as well live in afghanistan like what's the fucking difference i can't get there i can't ride my bike 60 miles my we aren't hanging out tonight yeah my dad's not driving me
Starting point is 00:35:34 an hour that's out of the question so he said then he's got to go home and then he's got to go home he said sports was his way to release his anger and his pent-up frustration he said i was almost like the water boy using my anger as tackling fuel i just had to get it all out oh no kidding so he just made a water boy reference here this is amazing the water boy of fucking three pointers over here the dunking water boy yeah mad, Medulla of Longata. Watch this dribble. I just pictured Sandler dunking with that fucking, with the vest on and everything. Throwing aside his water and just throwing down, because J.R. Smith can dunk like a motherfucker.
Starting point is 00:36:17 Right, he's getting his hips above the road. Oh, man, it's his head's even with that shit. So he goes to Lakewood High here. He's 6'6". he's dominating on the basketball team he's sure he's the guy i mean he's the big man on everything here he's also playing wide receiver on the football team no kidding a guy like jr smith who's a big strong guy who's six six as a wide receiver he'd be un-fucking-believable i mean he'd be insane honestly like remember when lebron said maybe i'll play football just to kind of troll some people if he started playing football un-fucking-believable. I mean, he'd be insane, honestly. I remember when LeBron said,
Starting point is 00:36:45 maybe I'll play football just to kind of troll some people. If he started playing football, imagine the tight end that guy would be. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Fucking 6'8", 260, jumping. He would be dominant. Jeez, who the fuck's covering him? Who is covering that guy?
Starting point is 00:36:58 And then he'd whine about every tackle. Well, I think, yeah, I would hope at that point he'd have to realize you get tackled. Hey, by the way tackling isn't part of basketball and i don't remember anyone writing whining more than michael jordan or getting more fouls and that's true yeah so you know what i mean good players whine that's why they get fouls and go to the line and score that extra six points a game that makes them over 30 but because he cries a lot he would certainly be a whiny bitch on the football court.
Starting point is 00:37:28 On the football court? Maybe. I don't think. I think he'd be bigger than everybody, so it'd be awfully hard for anybody to be running people over. Gronk's 6'6", isn't he? Or 6'5"? He ain't LeBron's size.
Starting point is 00:37:40 And nowhere near his athleticism. What's your vertical, Gronk? I bet it's not fucking 43 inches, probably. I bet it's four or three inches. Have you seen LeBron's hands? Yeah. He could just reach up and snatch a football out of the air if he wanted to. He would be very good at it, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:57 He should have. Maybe. Why? Let's go get my knees banged up and maybe get fucked up by the time I'm 25. He's still playing basketball. I think he did the right thing for his career probably. Might be right. I don't think there's a billion dollar football player yet.
Starting point is 00:38:13 That's like saying J.R. Smith, he should have done stonemasonry. Why not? So at Lakewood though, he's like a freshman. He's dunking all over the place. He's the shit. He's getting college recruiters are coming all over the place for him. But it's not the big colleges he wants. One of the coaches on Lakewood said he was the man.
Starting point is 00:38:41 There you go. He said he was the man. He said, but off the court, he was kind man there you go he said he was the man uh he said but off the court he was kind of a fuck up and they were trying to tell him hey you got to get your shit together because if you're a fuck up off the court these colleges aren't going to want you so right you know um jr himself said when i was at lakewood i was real childish i would be playing around in school hanging out more in the hallway than in the classroom. So, like, that seems normal. Why would you go in the classroom if you're pretty sure you're going to be in the NBA?
Starting point is 00:39:08 I would do the same thing if I was his age. Yeah, and I guess at least he's at the school if he's in the hallway. Yeah, so, I mean, he's not skipping. He's not getting in trouble. He's just like, yo, watch me dunk. Fuck math class. Which, hey, you know, I get it. But he said the problem was his father was insanely, insanely strict.
Starting point is 00:39:27 No parties. Couldn't go to parties. Couldn't go out with friends. No, no, no. That was that you'd get in trouble then and fuck up your college. So he wasn't allowed to do a goddamn thing. So if he was great, if he was going to cut up, it would have to be in the hallways at school because he's not allowed to do anything else except go to basketball. He's not going to screw up there.
Starting point is 00:39:44 So that's it. He said, though, quote quote it can be hard on you when all your friends are going out but i know my dad's always looking out for me okay that makes sense uh but his dad said anytime he bitches i'll be like you don't want to end up like kenny all right your brother kenny now remember that shit he said that piece of shit well kenny had a scholarship offer from Penn State to play football. I'm sorry, I thought it was basketball. It was football. And he said only just when he was just about to go there, it didn't work. And Earl said, quote, the girls got him.
Starting point is 00:40:16 He got in a little trouble and Penn State backed away. Now, that could mean he got charged with rape, and so Penn State backed away. That's what I saw in my head. The girls got him in trouble. No, he got himself in trouble. Yeah, that's everything from, you know, Joe Paterno's daughter thought he was a little too cute, to he raped a girl and got arrested for it, and then Penn State was like, yeesh, we got our own problems in the future. With what Sandusky's doing, we can't have two rapists here.
Starting point is 00:40:47 My God. So he, but during this time in Lakewood, it's like a regular public school, not a big basketball factory. He decides that he wants, or Big Earl decides that he's going to transfer to a prep school something more if anybody's seen the documentary hoop dreams you'll understand this it's the difference between these prep schools and public school are night and day for kids when it comes to basketball the college coaches and everything they go right to these prep schools to watch all the games you got to really make something of yourself in a public school to make everybody look at you, basically. It's a lot harder.
Starting point is 00:41:27 It's not set up for you. It's basically a college program in these prep schools. So it's not for everybody, too, because sometimes they just don't fit in or whatever, and they don't like it. So he wanted Earl's – one of Earl's senior things as junior, senior, whatever, is he wants whatever school he transfers to he wants to basically have him put back a year so yeah because he's entering
Starting point is 00:41:53 his senior season but he wants him to have two more years of basketball so he said i want my son to have two years there one year for the colleges to see him and recruit him and then another year for him to play and whatever so that's what he said holding them back a year that late yeah that's that's what they want that's what he wants to do wow because he was young for where his birthday fell he's young for his grade oh that's great it works so he's gonna okay so he's gonna graduate on time as you know that that birthday will fuck you in a way the school goes. Yeah, my son is a year ahead and my daughter's a year behind. Mine too.
Starting point is 00:42:27 My son's birthday's in February and it completely fucks him. He's a year, yeah, he's older and then my daughter's younger. So that's the way it always worked. So his father said St. Patrick's wanted him in the worst way, but he would have only played one year there. Then I tried Lawrenceville and Lawrenceville said no. Then I heard about St. Benedict's tried Lawrenceville and Lawrenceville said no. Then I heard about St. Benedict's. I don't think JR realized how hard it was.
Starting point is 00:42:53 Yeah, to pretend your kid was a year younger, that is hard. I literally went like Superman out to the fucking atmosphere and spun the earth backwards a year for him. The coach here at the school is bob hurley senior so oh really yeah there you go so that's a big deal yeah that's bobby hurley the he was a duke ball that's his dad yeah so his dad was known as a really good high school coach that's this is where i didn't know that this is where bobby hurley's from this school. So he said that his departure from Lakewood was really hard because apparently Lakewood had tailored their whole schedule around having him on the team.
Starting point is 00:43:33 So they said it was a shock when he left. We went from winning a sectional title to not even making the Shore Conference tournament. Ouch. We had to cancel some of our games against teams like St. Anthony. They made games with really good schools, and they were like, oh, we're going to lose by 100 points if we play them without Earl.
Starting point is 00:43:51 We're fucked. We're without JR. So his dad here, Earl, said, I didn't really care what everybody else thought. Didn't give a fuck. So he goes to St. Benedict's. That's where he ends up with. And he said that he's not the guy he was two years ago.
Starting point is 00:44:04 He's a different guy he said that his father showed him that uh basically that he's going to end up laying concrete block if he doesn't get his shit together and his father said if he had stayed at lakewood he would have gone to occ which is ocean community ocean county college not uh not at school at all or laying block with me. And J.R. said, I would have been a Prop 48. This is an NCAA ruling that forces players to sit out for a season if their grades don't qualify them. So that's why he said he would have gone to a junior college or not at all because he would have not wanted to do that. So I found articles, though, of him like dominating in these fucking games in high school. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:44:44 They're talking about here's a beginning of an article the greatest aerial assault that the rims at kennedy high school have ever withstood began ominously when jr smith of saint benedict's dunked an alley-oop pass with two hands on the game's first possession that is the greatest written holy shit written like that about me one thing we've had cool stuff about the podcast but that's awesome i'd cut that out assault the rim is ever withstood with began ominous i would blow that up and make it a poster that's awesome is that what he has tattooed on his neck i think it is he said he said uh the rims at kennedy high school ever withstood began ominously that's on his neck. Real.
Starting point is 00:45:27 So they just talk about him just dunking constantly, just fucking dunking all in different ways. Yeah. Whatever the, the coach of Kennedy, the other team said, that's the best dunking exhibition I've ever seen in this gym. What made it, what made it so special was that no two dunks were alike.
Starting point is 00:45:42 Yeah. And he did it all over my entire fucking it was amazing oh yeah i have a kid he's ruined from it his psyche's destroyed but you know what it was worth it that reverse dunk was something i never saw that but he said he's gonna get his shit together he said that he soon as he got to saint benedict's he realized oh shit this is different you actually have to and that's the real deal. If you watch Hoop Dreams, that's the thing, is that both the kids end up going to this prep school, and one of them, they end up, it doesn't quite work out for him.
Starting point is 00:46:13 His parents couldn't pay the tuition also, which was a problem, and they only made sure that they would because he wasn't doing well enough to, he wasn't playing great basketball, wasn't doing that well academically, so they were like, gee, your tuition's due. it's a real dick move on their part i thought and then the other kid was like oh shit i better buckle down and he was like you know doing homework for the first time and all that shit so um and that kid ended up going on and doing pretty well for himself actually he said uh so here um he says that he has he's had to work harder academically than he's ever had to in his life just to qualify here. That's Coach Hurley saying that. And J.R.'s younger brother said J.R. doesn't fool around anymore.
Starting point is 00:46:55 He's more ready for college now. He cares about schoolwork. Imagine having your little brother be quoted in the paper about about how you handle schoolwork. Imagine that. How does your brother handle schoolwork the fuck you work for a newspaper what are you asking me that for who cares fucking pervert right like what do you do you care what a 16 year old does like with his schoolwork you're weird yeah unless it's your kid you're fucking how hot does he look buried in that social studies book let me ask you in the shower like yeah he's turned away from you i get it but the water that's dripping off of his rock hard ass what does it look like is it is it sculpted or is it more like uh you know what i mean give me just fill me in here i need
Starting point is 00:47:42 to know how many craters are in it? What's up with that? Yeah. Dimpled? What do we got, dimples? Hurley, the coach, said when he first got here, the only way he could help us was to score and make perimeter shots. Now he has the ability to affect the game in other ways, whether it's on defense or rebounding the ball. He develops his skills. His dad said if a shot's not falling, he'll do something else to make up the difference. And a player on his team said, Smith has more shooting range now.
Starting point is 00:48:10 I remember when he was at Lakewood, he would take it to the hole all the time and try to dunk on people. Now he tries to stay within the team and do what it takes to win. He's so good that he's playing on all these AAU teams as well and shit. And Nike, they already have him kind of pegged as a future guy. And this is what these shoe companies do. In high school, they were sending him shoes that were specifically made for him.
Starting point is 00:48:34 Wow. Getting around everything. But like, here, here's these shoes. Get used to these. You like wearing Nikes, right? And then when he's ready for the NBA, then we'll right there to sign you. You're already wearing our shoes. So all those companies do this.
Starting point is 00:48:46 But Nike sent him J.R. Smith. I mean, they were made for him to his specifications, and they sent him back. Can't have him. No, Earl Sr. and J.R. said no, they didn't like him. Earl said he has to send them back all the time. He said, yeah, it just didn't fit right. Not for us.
Starting point is 00:49:08 Imagine if you were 17 and Nike made a pair of shoes for you and you were like, I'm sending these back. How hard in the back of the head would your mom have slapped you? Nike made you shoes and you're bitching. I don't give a fuck if they're uncomfortable or not. Put some Dr. Scholl's in them shits and get the fuck out there and dunk motherfucker they're gonna get they're gonna pay you if you don't wear them put them on the shelf i don't give a shit if you only wear them in the game i don't exactly you don't have to fucking like them but you're gonna wear them i don't care we're gonna take some pictures and send them to them that's what's gonna happen
Starting point is 00:49:41 yeah you have you dunking in them He only wants to go to North Carolina. Okay. He wants to play for Dean Smith. He wants to go to North Carolina. Nothing else he wants to do. That's it, and that's all. Yeah, Roy Williams. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:49:55 He had gone there by now. Yeah, Dean Smith had retired by then. But he said he wants to go there, and he was telling everybody that. So a lot of colleges didn't even recruit him because he said he told people in people in interviews i'm only going to north carolina it's the only place i'll go to college is north carolina so really yeah so if you were you know rutgers you're not even going to bother trying or your penn state or whoever isn't that a bad plan in anything that you choose it's a bad yeah it is but if you're a great player if you're one of the top 10 players in the country yeah you might be able to get North Carolina to recruit you.
Starting point is 00:50:27 Sure. You have to show – a school like that doesn't know – if they don't know you're real interested, they might not concentrate on you as hard. If they know they can get you, then that's a different thing. So JR said, I used to think about it all the time. If UNC doesn't offer me a scholarship, what am I going to do? It was a real gutsy call because other teams were going out and filling spots that they had been holding for me. But I thought, this is what I want to do, so I don't care what it takes to get there. Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 00:50:55 And Roy Williams, the coach, ended up seeing him at an AAU tournament. And he heard, this is the guy that won't go anywhere else? And he said, well, fuck yeah. Not too shabby. He said, quote, Coach Williams said something like, Mr. Smith to Earl, I may be blind, crazy, and stupid, but I'm not dumb. This kid can play five positions. Earl said, I was at a total loss for words. And JR said, it felt so great, it's hard to describe.
Starting point is 00:51:21 All that work paid off. It all paid off. He even said he was so excited he wasn't even going to ask to play football also, even though he was going to originally ask to also play wide receiver on the football team. But he said, I think about playing football every day, but it was a struggle enough to get my basketball scholarship, so I wasn't going to get into that with the coach. He also at this
Starting point is 00:51:45 time makes very good friends with lebron really yeah the same time period and uh i guess back in 2002 they were at some uh there was a some abcd camp which is one of the you know top player camps and i guess they sat next to each other and uh became friends i guess how about that joaquin noah was there as well sean livingston a bunch of guys were there and so they get there and uh smith said we just started rapping with each other and hit it off i knew this dude was going to be cool and then uh knew he'd be cool lebron invited jr smith to his when lebron got drafted the next year, 2003, he invited J.R. Smith to his house in Akron that he had just bought,
Starting point is 00:52:30 and they trained as, basically J.R. Smith trained with LeBron as LeBron was gearing up for his NBA. To play in the NBA. Yeah, for the NBA Summer League to start. So he was gearing up, yeah, to play in the NBA, and so he hung out for a couple weeks. J.R. did and trained with him, which is, I'm sure, good for him. And then in 2004, he's a McDonald's All-American.
Starting point is 00:52:50 Oh, not a McDonald's Employee of the Month? He's a McDonald's fry guy. He's amazing. They're the crispiest and the saltiest. They're going to be so good. This might be the best position at McDonald's that he's got right now. It's so good. The All-american that's the big deal it is uh the east versus the west on the east it's cory brewer jr smith dj white uh rajan rajan rondo's there dwight howard uh randolph morris rudy gay al
Starting point is 00:53:20 jefferson sebastian telfair josh smith a lot of guys here, Jordan Farmer, Malik Harrison, Aaron Alfalo, Alfalo, sorry, I forgot about that letter in there, Sean Livingston, Demarcus Nelson, Joe Crawford, Glenn Davis. Okay, so all these different guys here. He ended up in the game here, in the McDonald's All-American game, he scores 25 points the mvp honors with the undisputed who's going to be the number one draft pick dwight howard so he's co-mvps with dwight howard so that's a big deal um and then a week later he's at the nabc hoop tournament and he scores 17 points and does a huge thing so now he says maybe i maybe I'll go pro. Maybe fuck North Carolina. Even though I said I only want to go there
Starting point is 00:54:08 and they made a whole special thing and cleared out a spot for me and did all this shit, maybe fuck Roy Williams. So he said he's going to hold a press conference to tell everyone his decision. Oh, JR. Whether I'm going to college or not. So it is fucking insane. uh that's what he does
Starting point is 00:54:28 his yearbook quote by the way and for a senior year yeah is quote get chicks or die trying jr that is you better be careful because you might die trying. Oh, he's a character, boy. We're going to get into it now. Now, experts like his chances. One NBA draft guy, Chris Monter, he said he's a big-time athlete with very deep NBA range. The knocks on him are putting it on the floor and developing that mid-range game. His stock has really moved up, and it's not a strong draft at shooting guard. People will look at his athleticism. He definitely has the athletic ability to make it he said he's listed at 6-5 at
Starting point is 00:55:11 that point but he said that's absolutely legit he's not like 6-4 saying he's 6-5 so the 6-6 is probably his listing that's a stretch yeah but he's a legit 6-5 he said usually the other guys that have gone are a little a little taller that the high school guys, Kevin Garnett, Jermaine O'Neal, Tracy McGrady. But Kobe's only a little bit taller than that, so fuck it. Maybe it can work. They said basically what he needs to do is work on expanding his game and becoming more versatile. So him himself, JR, says that he's been told that he could probably be taken in the top 15. That's a lot of money.
Starting point is 00:55:47 He said if he can get within the first round, that's a three-year guaranteed contract there. That's your money that you're going to make. So it's a big deal. And by the way, at that time, the number one pick was guaranteed $8 million at that time to sign, I guess. And the number 29 pick gets about a guaranteed $2.5 million. So either way, you're going to get a couple million guaranteed in there. He decides, damn it, he's going to the NBA. Fuck college.
Starting point is 00:56:15 He says, the high school All-Star Games convinced me that I have what it takes to play in the NBA. I got great feedback from the NBA draft committee. I was told I could go anywhere from 1 to 16. He said that he's going to do it. And he said, I have athleticism and shooting ability that NBA teams look for in a draft pick. I'm also a great competitor. I'm also very humble and modest.
Starting point is 00:56:39 Did I mention that? Right. I think I'll be ready to contribute right away that's what he says so uh 2004 by the way i said we'll humble and modest after i said how good of a show we put on so yeah we do though fuck that we do a good job there's a reason to be proud yeah there you go so 2004 nba draft first pick overall jimmy uh dwight howard there you go i thought maybe you just said it i thought you're gonna go oh maybe he didn't though and you know joke on it but yeah i'm a good listener yeah dwight howard amigo like the guy i feel like the guy in the rehearsal that just got all the answers
Starting point is 00:57:15 given to him throughout the day that guy yeah and he still forgot a couple but this um yeah this luckily this was like 90 seconds ago you were told so that's helpful also dwight howard amika okafor number second number two number second number second overall on the football on the football court ben gordon for the to the uh bulls after that yeah there he goes after that they were both from yukon that year two and three wait no i'm thinking of the other gordon am i i don't know eric gordon you're thinking of nick no never mind so uh yeah good devin harris uh well dang is on this uh is in here andre guadal is here uh sebastian telfer who we've talked about plenty. Chris Humphries and his Kardashian Marian ass there. Al Jefferson, Kirk Snyder. Number 18 overall. Is that right?
Starting point is 00:58:10 The New Orleans Hornets decide we're going with J.R. Smith, baby. Oh yeah, they do. Unbelievable. They take him. He goes to New Orleans for 2004 and 2005. His family comes with him. Really? Oh yeah. He's like 18 years old so he's young but
Starting point is 00:58:27 earl ida and the youngest brother demetrius all moved into a new six bedroom home in the uh english turn golf community in suburban suburban new orleans and uh yeah chris paul stayed with them by the way while he was looking for a place when he came the next year. He stayed with the family. Yeah. So they said dad monitored J.R.'s finances. It was like he lived at home still. He lived with them and dad monitored the finances.
Starting point is 00:58:57 In 2004, that place is about to get destroyed. Yep. We'll certainly talk about all that shit so he said that early in the preseason uh jr smith's dad drove him to practice and walked into the gym with him yeah and earl earl his father said that he uh people said quote what are you doing here and he said that he was helping his son acclimate to the new environment and earl said i didn't care if i had to sit in the car but the idea of me being there was unacceptable to them yeah because he's a professional athlete now and his only that is job he's at work he said do you work here
Starting point is 00:59:38 no what the fuck are you doing here you don't work here yeah did you go to orientation why are you here imagine if i took my my fucking dad up on stage with us at a show i think the audience would think that's weird hey jim how are you who's he he's just sitting in a chair no microphone or anything no he doesn't work here he's just hanging out the koozie out of his back yeah it's real comfortable puts a beer in it he's like i'll just be up here don't worry about it so that'd be strange i think people would probably look at me weird so he uh he said though the whole thing took a toll on him is what he said he said quote it took a toll on me this is jr so you know yeah i think i was correct he said i was always the best player on my team and now i
Starting point is 01:00:26 was just a number they can bring guys in to replace you and that kind of hits you they don't think you're as uh they don't think you're good enough or don't work hard enough he said i was hard-headed and stubborn i thought i knew everything i thought i was on the stage where only a few people could touch me and tell me what to do i used to think all I had to do was pay attention to the guys I cared about, like Kobe, T-Mac, and Bron, guys who came straight from high school and had tremendous success. It just didn't work out like that for me. I was never that guy they were going to build around,
Starting point is 01:00:56 and I had to learn to accept that. Yeah. Also, why do you act like you're so independent? You brought your dad everywhere. Literally, his dad was telling him that he wasn't allowed to buy shit when he was a rookie. Yeah, he said, it's your rookie contract. You don't have money. That'll make your team be like, this kid's not ready to be built around.
Starting point is 01:01:16 He's incapable. He needs his dad everywhere. That's the thing. And it's not a matter of living with his dad or whatever. It's a matter of just his whole life was kind of under that control there. So 2004-05 is rookie season. The Hornets are terrible, 18-64. God fucking awful.
Starting point is 01:01:34 18, oh my God. They had Birdman Anderson there, Daryl Armstrong. Poor bastard. They had P.J. Brown. Jesus Christ, I'm trying to look for guys that were anybody that's anywhere that's worth a fuck george lynch the guitarist for docking was in there rodney rogers david west david wesley also this is not a great roster here obviously it's good players they're just you know it's not time for them anymore doesn't go together yeah a lot of guys over 10 years in the league one two three four five guys
Starting point is 01:02:09 on the roster over 10 years in the league that's a lot 50 years combined with five guys that's crazy 54 years with five guys that's a lot so he was named western conference rookie of the month three different times january february and march so that's pretty fucking impressive he's the guy he's the guy he does participate in the 2005 nba slam dunk contest as well did he really finishing third not bad third's good you you got through the first round anyway yeah not bad pretty good shit that year 76 games he starts 56 of them so it's a bad team yeah that's one thing if you go to a bad team like this, you're going to get playing time as a rookie. 24 and a half minutes a game,
Starting point is 01:02:49 which is about as much as you can expect as a rookie. 10.3 points, 1.9 assists, 2.0 rebounds. So not bad, but not that great. It's a bad team. Yeah, it's a bad team. He plays shooting guard, right? Yeah, he plays it too.
Starting point is 01:03:05 Yeah. He plays $1 million. He doesn't pay. He makes $1,206,600. So not too shabby for an 18-year-old kid, 19 at the end of the year. If you don't know when Crystal Pepsi was discontinued, what was in Al Capone's vault, or which famous meteorologist is Lenny Kravitz's second cousin, then you haven't spent enough time on Wikipedia. But that's okay. I am here for you. I'm Darcy Carden, and I'm inviting you to listen to my new podcast, WikiHole, from Smartless Media. Discover the craziest rabbit holes on Wikipedia with me and my funny friends as we bring the
Starting point is 01:03:41 cyber frontier directly to your tympanic membrane. And if you listen to my podcast, you'd learn that that's the science-y term for eardrum. We embark on a hyperlink rollercoaster as we start out on a Wikipedia page and go from link to link to link to link, careening through trivia, oddities, and unexpected
Starting point is 01:03:59 connections until we collectively shout, how the hell did we get here? Follow WikiHole on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to WikiHole ad-free by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. So decent rookie here. It's pretty good. Not bad at all.
Starting point is 01:04:19 He has three good months. Not bad. I mean, promising. It's a mid-first round draft pick. It's not like they had a lottery pick. So if you've got a guy who can contribute in the first year out of a non-lottery pick, you fucking win. That's not bad.
Starting point is 01:04:30 2005 and 2006 Hornets, talk about a tough situation for a team. This is Hurricane Katrina time. So basically their arena is fucked and it's damaged and destroyed. So they end up playing their season in oklahoma city oh my god is that right yeah this year they're the new orleans slash oklahoma city hornets so this is a mess is what they played all home games away they had to yeah there's no no choice in the in the matter before the commencement of training camp is when Katrina came. So they couldn't play down there. Yeah, it was the offseason even.
Starting point is 01:05:06 But somehow they had like sellout crowds there all the time in Oklahoma City. People came in support of them. Yeah, there was a lot of pity for anybody. The Saints, the Hornets, everything that was New Orleans involved had an insane amount of support given to it. They were probably getting some discount tickets too i would imagine you know you would you would expect so yeah i know there was a lot of displaced new orleans people in this area as well so that helped too yeah that people moved
Starting point is 01:05:34 up there so 38 and 44 they go this year so they're they they get they gain 20 wins from last year that's great uh just be that it doesn't smell like pirates of the caribbean yeah maybe that's what it's not so humid so they're happy so they uh they also get chris paul this year so that's pretty good and um yeah doing pretty well here and uh they do everything chris anderson birdman gets a two-year suspension this year though for for drugs so that's a problem yeah yeah this is his two-year suspension time it's just weed i think after a while was it weed or something right i don't remember what honestly i don't remember i'm sure we'll talk about him at some point but i hope so and give the guy a pass for christ's sake his life was ruined yeah yeah yeah he's all fucked up that's fine kid i mean yeah with delonte west too same thing with him he's a disaster yeah so this year uh 55 games, 25. He had a little knee problem this year, by the way, J.R.
Starting point is 01:06:25 25 games started, 18 minutes a game, 7.7 points, and 1.1 assists, and only two rebounds, too. Oh, God. Feels like his career's dropping already and going away. Year two, he's going to quit. Byron Scott hates him this year. Oh, really? He says he has shit work ethic and won't start him and plays him lower minutes. And he's basically, the coach does not like him this year and says he has shit work ethic and won't start him and plays in lower minutes and uh he's basically the coach does not like him this year byron scott says lots of bad
Starting point is 01:06:50 things about him doesn't i'm not surprised but even watching him play when he was good with a good team he's kind of a dick oh well yeah he starts brawls as we'll talk about too he's a pain in the ass but he makes one million two hundred ninety seven thousand eighty dollars this year. $2.5 million so far. Not bad. That's pretty good. He's 20.
Starting point is 01:07:10 He's made that. That's awesome. He's made a million for every decade he's alive so far. Not too shabby. July 14, 2006, he's traded by the Hornets with P.J. Brown to the Chicago Bulls for Tyson Chandler. Is that right? Yes. You don't remember that because he's only on the team for six days, so he never plays for them and there's never any games.
Starting point is 01:07:31 Yep. July 20th, he's traded by the Bulls to the Denver Nuggets for Howard Isley in a draft pick. And Carmelo made him a star. There you go. So 2006-07, the Nets are 45-37. You mean Nuggets? Did I say N nuggets or did i say nets yes nuggets he's from new jersey who cares he's from new jersey the nets are on my mind so 45 and 37 george carl is the
Starting point is 01:07:55 coach george carl by the way hates him as well he even in george carl's book he went out of his way to say how much he did not like jr smith and he doesn't like him and uh everything else and jr smith won't speak george carl's name because he doesn't because he hates him so he hates him that much he says a coach that i used to have whose name i won't say it's that when he said if you ever hear him say that that means george carl that's the that's his code for george carl the man put up with Sean Kemp and Peyton fucking... How do you piss him off so much? Fucking hates him.
Starting point is 01:08:32 Wow. This year they have Carmelo Anthony on this team, Earl Boykins, Marcus Camby on this squad. This is a fun squad. Allen Iverson on this squad as well. Fuck, Iverson was good, man. Iverson's going to probably be our next basketball episode yeah and i just love alan iverson he's one of those where a lot of it's going to be like yeah but fuck man look at him he's awesome
Starting point is 01:08:53 who gives a fuck what he does he right bringing eyes to the team god damn it he uh you know kobe said thank god he's not six five is we5". The whole league should thank God he's not 6'5", is what he said. He'd be a monster at 6'5". He's tiny. Anyway, this team goes to the playoffs. They lose to the Spurs in five, but the Spurs were doing pretty well at that point. So still, for JR, not too shabby. He gets on the team anyway.
Starting point is 01:09:21 We're going to go ahead and say grace here, getting to Denver. Getting to Denverver hooking up with a carmelo anthony he needs a he needs a batman yeah he's a rob he's a robin and he needs a batman and uh he has his lebron batman later and carmelo anthony is his batman for a little while but he likes being kind of a second fiddle that's kind of his his game which is a smart position to play honestly oh my god it's the greatest it's not a bad position for this guy because if you got a guy like lebron or i mean fuck it yeah what do you want me to do great yeah i'll go over here we're gonna win championships cool awesome of all
Starting point is 01:09:58 fucking comic book people to be robin's the one i'd love you don't have to do shit he gets he's still up on the goddamn podium at the end when the mayor's saying how great they are robin's standing right there getting all the accolades so in the worst suit ever yeah we're super suit i have a feeling it's by choice though he picked that out he could have had anything he wants he's like i want yellow and red and green i want to look like an idiot can you make me look like an idiot just make me look dumb as shit with like just make me look like a male stripper mask oh do that yeah and make me look like a mix between a christmas tree and a hot dog can you do that i'd like that's what i like my outfit to be give me a christmas tree a hot dog and throw a little bit of elf in there yeah Yeah, I'd like to be elfish.
Starting point is 01:10:45 A little elfin, sort of. I make toys and we're not fighting crime. That's the worst superhero, but he's the best because he's just benefiting like crazy. He's tremendous, man. I'm telling you. So, JR talks about old George Carl. He says, quote, I had a coach who just killed me every day. I won't say his name because I would be killing him and I don't want to fall into that trap. That's George Carl. He says, quote, I had a coach who just killed me every day. I won't say his name because I would be killing him
Starting point is 01:11:06 and I don't want to fall into that trap. But he put a bad label on me and people who didn't know me assumed that if he didn't like me, I must be terrible. Just like you said, he put up with these people. How do you piss them off? You had two coaches back to back that have been with
Starting point is 01:11:22 amazing teams and seen how that works. And you're gonna you're gonna do the opposite he said except they didn't know that he gets into it with everybody yeah nobody likes george carl after a while but he wins a lot so uh earl his dad said quote george carl never liked him he doesn't mind saying his name. Fuck George Carl. Bitch ass, bald, heart attack having motherfucker. Fuck him. Fuck him and his bad heart. Fuck him, his bad heart, his big old fat ass.
Starting point is 01:11:53 I don't give a fuck. Fuck Seattle. Fuck them all. Fuck Denver. All that money, no hair, you dumb fuck. That's right. By the way, later on, he's talking. I'll just say the quote now.
Starting point is 01:12:04 He's talking to LeBron saying that basically there's a reporter saying how they break each other's balls and laugh and cut each other up and shit. And LeBron said at one point, JR said something about his hair. Now you got hair and now you think you're like this. And LeBron said, I'm too rich to be bald, which I thought was a really funny fucking. But we all know Lebron is there's hair up here though look at it that's the way he looks at it check it out fucking hair should there be hair that's another conversation didn't didn't ask me that he said is there hair hair the crazy part is with all that a billion fucking dollars that's the hair he got that's crazy that's what
Starting point is 01:12:43 you're getting well you can't have it like all way down your forehead, so it looks like you're trying to. We know it was receding some, so you got to have it be like, it's got to even it out, bring it forward, sculpt it. I don't know. How do you decide? It's not good. It looks so bad, though. When dudes get plugs, they decide where they want a hairline, so that would be a weird
Starting point is 01:13:02 thing. Like, where do I put my fucking hairline would be a weird question i don't know how to answer you know what i mean i don't know just tattooed stubble he's smooth fucking head james it's just a little graying up there that it looks great it looks terrific oh my god until some lady rubs your head and she's like oh god you're what the fuck there's no stubble actually what the fuck? There's no stubble, actually, until the back. Yeah, why is your stubble so smooth? The smoothest stubble going. You're like a peach.
Starting point is 01:13:31 It looks great. Oh, my God. That's hilarious. So maybe George Carl should have done that. He should have. So Earl, his dad told him, I told him to shoot the ball no matter what because Carl's going to take your ass out anyway. anyway okay disobey your coach that'll help chauncey billups is kind of his mentor also because chauncey billups has been around a long time and he's known as like a very mature kind
Starting point is 01:13:55 of cat except when they beat up that stripper with gary payton we'll talk about that on sex scandals part two on patreon this week actually so uh it happened except for when he throws blows on hip or strippers this that was like 23 years earlier or something there no 23 is 13 years earlier from when we're talking about now so it's a long time ago so he told him chauncey told jr people will form opinions of you based on the way you look how your dress uh how you dress will be how you're addressed, he told him. Also, that's when J.R. started wearing all sorts of weird, funky shit. He's known as a real fashion plate J.R.
Starting point is 01:14:32 He wears, like, weird fur and shit. He's a nut. Really? Yeah, he's like a more, he's like if you mix Rick's, give Cam Newton a little Rick James and you got J.R. Smith, basically. I guess I didn't know that. But, yeah, he dresses fucking a little Rick James and you got J.R. Smith, basically. I guess I didn't know that. Yeah, he dresses fucking a little crazy sometimes. So Billups would later on say about him, quote, J.R. is a beautiful kid. He comes from a great family and a loving home.
Starting point is 01:14:56 He's a sweetheart of a kid. I'm proud of what he's done and who he's become. He deserves everything. Clarence has real nice parents. Clarence has real nice parents. Clarence has real nice parents, exactly. So December 16, 2006 is when he starts a big brawl, basically. Starts a big brawl that causes him to get a 10-game suspension. Playing for the Nuggets?
Starting point is 01:15:18 Playing for the Nuggets, yeah. 10-game suspension. It's in Madison Square Garden. It's a fucking, it's a melee. It's a kind of a good like the the one at the palace is different because you always hear about that because fans were involved in that brawl the ones on the court they kind of go away when the next brawl comes on the court so who do you fight it wasn't just him it was all sorts of people it was just a melee a lot
Starting point is 01:15:41 of people got suspended it was a fucking disaster so. What always happened with the Knicks, man? It's the way it is. The fans like it. That's why. We like it. Because this game sucks. Let's fight. In the 90s, it was, fuck that.
Starting point is 01:15:56 I don't know why that is. And I think teams seem to get basketball teams, baseball teams especially do this. And football teams do it too but baseball teams they seem to get players that fit the personality of the area you know what i mean like yeah san francisco and seattle and la have always had more asian players than anybody else that's where all the fucking asian people are so they always have a lot of japanese players it seems like that's to you know what i'm saying whereas like the Yankees always end up with like a lot of Dominicans and like people, like three Italian guys, like people that aren't as much in the league.
Starting point is 01:16:31 You know what I mean? They represent the city itself. More actual black guys because it's like 8% black guys in the league now. So like more, it seems like they represent. And Pittsburgh has people that look like steel workers. Yeah, they look like a lot of white guys. And Milwaukee will try to stock up on some white guys. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:16:47 So it seems like, I don't know, not all the time, obviously, but they seem to do that. Basketball kind of, I guess, maybe, I don't know, has that personality, too, or like the personality of your city. People that are willing to throw some fits. Yeah. Who fits into New York? Anthony Mason, Charles Oakley, Xavier McDaniel, Charles Patrick Ewing. These are all John Starks, even, the underdog guy who likes to fight people. It's just Greg Anthony, all these different guys.
Starting point is 01:17:13 It's kind of how it was. Fascinating. But this, everybody blames this on JR. Well, he's from fucking Jersey, close enough. Yeah, that's what I mean. It's his style. And that's how that's playground style, too. It's just a harder, more hard-edged version of basketball.
Starting point is 01:17:31 It's different. So February 7, 2007, he's in a car accident. Oh, no. Apparently, J.R. Smith, it's him and Carmelo Anthony are together. J.R. is driving one of Carmelo Anthony's cars with Carmelo in the passenger seat for some reason. It's a badass car, I guarantee it. Yeah, it is. Yeah, you want to drive it?
Starting point is 01:17:49 Cool, man. It's probably a Rolls or something. So I remember that Cribs. He had sick cars. Carmelo Anthony had it all, man. Carmelo's made a shitload of money, but he spent a giant chunk of it on rad shit. On awesome shit. Absolutely.
Starting point is 01:18:03 He keeps making money, though though so it doesn't matter and he still has all this awesome shit so yeah he who wins carmelo if you make 300 million dollars you can piss a lot of money away it's not like back in the day 120 pissed away ain't so bad no back in the day guys would make you know 18 million dollars for their whole career and they're like how'd you piss that away it's like i bought a house and three cars and got a divorce so it's all gone now that's how it would work whereas 300 million it's a lot harder to piss that away yeah you could have a drug problem and be fine you know for quite some time quite some time and be doing snorting coke off of your off of a off the little tray on a private plane that That's what you're doing. That a flight attendant served you.
Starting point is 01:18:45 That's right. Here you are, sir. Your cocaine. So this accident, he's driving. By the way, he has just a goddamn, he drives like shit. Let's just put it that way. He drives like shit. This is on the way to practice.
Starting point is 01:19:01 They both miss a game with small injuries. Yeah. This is on the way to practice. They both miss a game with small injuries. They find out that between 2005 and 2007, he'd gotten 28 points on his license. What? 28 points on his license. Had his license suspended multiple times in this two years. He scored more points on his license than he did in a season.
Starting point is 01:19:21 I don't know if he has had a 28-point game, but he certainly is just going to say 28 points. I don't know if he's had a whole game, but 28 points on his license, including four speeding tickets over that period of time in two years. You can't get those out. You can only take class once in two years. That's it. So he gets his license suspended and reinstated a couple of times. And it's really he's a bad driver. He drives. He's not careful and drives very fast.
Starting point is 01:19:47 So keep that in mind. This year, though, he plays 63 games, starts 24 of them. 23.3 minutes a game. So still not getting the whole plan, half the game. 13 points a game, though, his best scoring season so far. 1.4 assists, 2.3 rebounds. So everything's up. All his points are up at this point.
Starting point is 01:20:07 That's good. You like that. His money's up, too. $1,387,560. Okay. 21 years old. Unbelievable. Fucking A, how great would you feel?
Starting point is 01:20:19 So ahead. Life is your oyster. Ahead on everything. Oh, my. How would you just... You'd drive everywhere with the sunroof open, even if it was raining, and just be like, I'm so wonderful. Life is great.
Starting point is 01:20:30 Hey, how you doing? You'd be... I'd be doing 90 with no turn signals, too. Fuck it. You'd be like Tom Hanks after he fucked Daryl Hannah in Splash. He'd be, Mr. Bluebird on my... He's singing fucking Zippity-doo-dah around the fruit and shit. While John Candy asks you what's wrong.
Starting point is 01:20:49 What's wrong? The hell's going on with you? So, this is all great until June 9th, 2007, when everything changes and all of this shit kind of catches up to him here. He is driving a 2003 GMC Yukon here. All right. He has a couple people in the car. He's got a passenger and then he's got his friend Andre Bell in the back seat. It's a high school friend.
Starting point is 01:21:16 Guy's known forever. So hang around. He blows through a stop sign, does JR, at a high rate of speed. We'll talk about exactly how high of a rate but just about double the speed limit put it that way blows through a stop sign and plows into a jaguar shit flipping both cars okay neither uh neither uh jr nor his friend andre Bell were wearing seatbelts. Oh, shit. They're both ejected from the vehicle. What? As it rolls, okay?
Starting point is 01:21:54 Now, they find out his license has been suspended five times in the last year and a half, but at this point, it's actually good. It's in good standing. He just had it reinstated recently and all that sort of shit. He had paid all his fines and fees, so he wasn't wanted for anything. But he had, yeah, eight violations on seven different dates in two years. Jesus Christ. That's a lot.
Starting point is 01:22:12 Five speeding. Anyway, it's fucked up. They're both taken to the hospital. He has a slight shoulder injury and some scratches. That's what JR gets out of it. His friend is in a coma. His friend is in a coma. His friend's in a coma, and he lasts a couple of days, and then he dies. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:22:34 Yeah, Andre Bell died from this. Not hanging on. Not hanging on at all. That's brutal, man. That's rough. at all that's brutal man that's rough uh the denver nuggets the issued a very silver statement saying that the uh he's devastated by the loss of his good friend and i'm sure they'd like some privacy while he figures out if he's going to go to prison or not that's we got more questions why were you doing that that's the thing they found out from his data recorder in his vehicle that his uh car at that point was
Starting point is 01:23:05 driving 67 miles an hour through the stop sign in a place where the speed limit was 35 yeah uh through a stop sign yeah that's not great um now they a grand jury it goes to grand jury to see if they're going to indict him on like you know vehicular manslaughter charges they declined to indict him but he is charged with five motor vehicle violations including reckless driving which we'll talk about here in a minute so 2007 and 8 season obviously this is pretty fucking busy pretty fucking busy season here oh i'm sure um after all of that the man hasn't digested a decent meal in a month this man hasn't been able to just digest a decent meal in six weeks he has got to have the worst rumble i love that so much he has to there's no way you how do you how do you sleep at night knowing you
Starting point is 01:24:00 you are responsible for the death of your friend well Well, you don't sleep at night. You go do things, as we'll talk about. Oh, my God. What do you think, he goes home and cries about it? No, no, no, no, no. He's autonomous now and does his own thing. The team finishes 50-32 that year, by the way, and they go to the playoffs getting swept by the Lakers in the first round. But, yeah, he, on October 13, 2007,
Starting point is 01:24:24 just a few short months after the the incident here, he is issued later on will be issued a summons to appear to answer allegations of destruction of property. Apparently, there's a large fight outside of a nightclub here. Yeah. And he the apparently it was there was only portions of it on video but when the police arrived the bar owner pointed out jr smith as one of the main instigators of destroying shit and starting the fight so i realize that i don't have all the information but from the outside looking in it does not appear that he is mourning the loss of his friend it doesn't seem like it he's out fighting and partying unbelievable so he ends up getting suspended for three games after that.
Starting point is 01:25:07 And the police decide to issue a summons rather than arrest him. I think because there was a lot of people there. I think that's how it works. They were just issuing summons there. He is suspended for three games. And he says, and I quote, I take full responsibility for my actions that led to this suspension. He gives a lot of speeches like this when you're a fuck up like this guy you have to have a lot of apologies
Starting point is 01:25:31 locked and loaded because you're gonna need them you know you're definitely gonna need them you're fucking up a lot he has one of those composition books filled with my occult yeah just a yellow legal pad where it's like my apologies it's called he's got some that are in poem form like who's he's got going on it's very nice headers for bar fight for yeah bar fights for accidental murder of friend accidentally killing a friend for uh pulling a tan gun on a teammate in the locker room that's a good one i'm gonna need that one for later oh i'll let gilbert arenas borrow that one. Hold on a minute. He said, I realize the organization wants to help me become not only a better player,
Starting point is 01:26:12 but also the best person I can off the court. I apologize to my teammates, the coaching staff, and my family, and the Nuggets. I promise to learn from this situation and look forward to returning shortly and being the best teammate I possibly can be. I won't, A, injure the star of my team, B, put the whole bread and butter of the team. I won't injure him with my bad driving. I also won't fucking kill any of my friends with my bad driving. Oh, and I'll try not to get any more nightclub brawls all within a six-month period.
Starting point is 01:26:44 I'll try to be cool. Are you kidding me? try not to get any more nightclub brawls all within a six-month period i'll try to be cool hey good way good rule of thumb for uh not having fights at nightclubs is don't go to fucking nightclubs that's the one would you go there that's the one there stop going to nightclubs at the well but he's he's a young guy he's 20 fucking two years old right but you can afford to have your own nightclub at home don't do it everywhere else but when you're 22 if you do this at home then you can't show everybody that's the problem and you can't see strange ass yes do you know who i am put this in your mouth you can't show up with a twenty thousand dollar watch on and a fucking and be like a stranger what's up other 22 year old person who i want to fuck aren't i cool yeah look
Starting point is 01:27:26 what i have can you do that you can now now want to come back to my house to party right let's put this inside you exact come on let's get this in you let's go believable let's get a nice dick in you okay come on let's go honey that's that's how he thinks let's go so this year george carl must really hate him uh which i mean all the shit he's doing i don't blame him but 74 games he plays and starts zero whoa who gots not a game averages 19.2 per game minutes wise but i think he that's a statement i'm not starting you at all for any reason averages 12.3 points a game though not terrible 1.7 assists 2.1 rebounds so not bad makes 2 million 134 560 dollars though that is an expensive bench anchor that's a very
Starting point is 01:28:14 expensive bench player there 2008 and 9 uh the nuggets are 54 and 28 they actually win in the first round of the playoffs beating the hornets right so getting some hornet revenge uh then they beat the mavericks as well they beat dallas four to one and then lose to the lakers in six in the playoffs so and that's because it was uh that was a big deal that yeah and they lost in six so it was like uh it was it was a tough series for that there was hope hope is a bitch of a thing. Oh, man. Hope is the worst thing you could have in sports. It's only going to hurt you. It's the worst thing to get dashed.
Starting point is 01:28:51 It's only going to hurt you, man. I'm telling you. Just be a Jaguars fan and get it over with. So they lose there. He plays an 81 game, starts 18 of them, 27.7 minutes per game. So it's a career high there there 15.2 points per game career high there he's uh 2.8 assists 3.7 rebounds all career highs by a lot so very very good four million nine hundred eighty five thousand and one dollar everything career high including
Starting point is 01:29:21 that is amazing goddamn good now june 30th 2009 he's in court for his friend's death anything that for a bunch of shit now this is for all the traffic shit and related to andre bell's death he uh the problem is is he's asking for you know hey please be nice to me. Give me leniency here. And the court says, hey, the judge actually finds it disturbing. They say that you have gotten since your fucking since this has happened in a year's time or two years time, you've gotten two speeding tickets since then. How do you do that? So they're like that didn't your friend dying didn't get through to you to drive differently. Forget what happened to other people in the accident. You were thrown from your own vehicle.
Starting point is 01:30:12 Career could have been over. Over. The car this much that way, this much that way. His career is fucking over. This is all over with. And he's in a wheelchair. And the two main causes of this are speeding and running a stop sign, and you still have not stopped the one main thing. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:29 You idiot. And he wasn't even drunk. He's just a terrible driver. He just drives like an asshole. Yeah. Just drives like a fucking asshole. Oh, my God. She also said, the judge, that letting him off without jail time would probably send the wrong message.
Starting point is 01:30:43 Because since you haven't learned it since then, the judge went on to say that there has to be a deterrence. Young people look up to Mr. Smith. He's a role model. What would that say to them? That it's okay to speed? Yeah. and they also his his uh jr's defense team read a letter from andre's mother wanda which she wrote last fall in support of jr calling calling smith quote a beautiful young man who was like a brother to her son why does everybody say beautiful about him he's a beautiful young man jimmy don't you
Starting point is 01:31:20 understand don't you see beauty about him don't you see beauty where it is jimmy jesus do you look at a sunset and go that's nice i mean come on you look at a a beautiful work of art and you say yeah that's all right where do you go it's beautiful man i've seen nothing beautiful about this guy yet he's fucking beautiful shut your mouth jimmy he's super beautiful dude so he says to the judge quote this is in please be nice to me and don't send me to prison quote it's been unbearable to deal with i'm deeply sorry i never intended for this to happen it tears me up that it went down like that i believe that that's probably true but you still haven't fucking corrected your behavior you're still a dipshit and she says you sir may fuck off 90 days in jail
Starting point is 01:32:13 not bad not but but but but but but suspends 60 of them so he's gonna spend a month and he can schedule that whenever he wants i'm sure and do it in the off season this is a month in jail uh of which he'll spend 24 days by the way uh-huh uh there also oh it's not over yet jimmy 500 hours of community service visiting sick children at hospitals which he's on the fucking basketball team he should be doing that anyway right you know what i mean so they also suspend his driver's license for two years, which is probably good. That'll begin to begin next March after his current license suspension expires because his license is currently suspended for speeding tickets. They also impose. Now, here's the stiff part of it, Jimmy.
Starting point is 01:32:57 They impose a fine on him as well. So they're going to hit him where it hurts. Where does it hurt? The pocketbook, Jimmy. To the tune of $506. so they're going to hit him where it hurts. Where does it hurt? The pocketbook, Jimmy. Yeah. To the tune of $506. And six, motherfucker. Oh, and there's court costs. Don't forget about those.
Starting point is 01:33:14 $33 in court costs. So he's fined $539 in addition to this, so that'll teach him. Ridiculous. Yeah, and in addition to that as well, this is, by the way, despite the opposition from the Bell family, the court entered a civil reservation, which means that this is barred. This ruling is barred admission in civil proceedings. So if they sue him, the Bells, they're not allowed to say he was found guilty and sentenced to this sentence in civil that is fucked they're not allowed to know that that's part of the deal
Starting point is 01:33:50 that's fucked up that's part of the fucking deal horrible they just made a horrible case for bell's family to sue for wrongful death that's fucked up man basically they're gonna have to settle with him is what that is i guess so um his attorney said he's 23 years old he's a tough kid and he's gay and he's going to do these four weeks and come out a better person and the nuggets said we will continue to support jr during this difficult period and we'll have no other further comment yeah there because if we say anything else we're gonna just be looking shocked that he got off with this this is amazing it's gonna look bad either way essentially so august 5th 2009 he gets out of jail okay um and the nuggets said that they had
Starting point is 01:34:32 nothing more to say about it when they asked the nuggets or like well not whatever he immediately hits twitter when he gets out of jail jr social media is the worst thing for him because it gets him in a lot favorite he's. It's cost him money. It's cost him games in the NBA because of shit he's posted on social media. Yeah. He always gets in trouble on social media with the league. Dummy. So he tells his followers, quote, I just came home.
Starting point is 01:34:59 I thank all the fans for your support. But he spelled came instead of with a C. He spelled it with a c he spelled it with a capital k which is a gang thing yeah to take the c out of everything and replace it with blood guy and it's a capital so he's making sure that you see that shit as well so that's the thing that says that's a telltale sign that someone so that you see it james it's so that you view it because you better not say c you didn't say you're right no c's so that you view it because you better not say see. You didn't see. You're right. No see. You viewed it. God damn it.
Starting point is 01:35:26 You're right, Jimmy. You know what? When you're right, you're right, my friend. This son of a bitch is just pointing out, I just got home. By the way, I'm now a blood. Yeah. I did 24 days in jail. I had to join a gang.
Starting point is 01:35:42 In jail. Not prison. Jail. Yeah. Unbelievable. Now I'm a gang member. Because it didn't come from his youth when he wasn't allowed to go outside and his dad was a millionaire. That's not your typical blood. I spent 24 days in Capital K County.
Starting point is 01:35:55 Yeah. I did it in Capital K County. Can't wait to go play the next game out in Capital California K. Holy shit. Unbelievable. the next game out in capital california k holy shit unbelievable so apparently he did this a couple times with a couple different tweets where they were this one caught people's attention because it was when he just got out of jail but then it happened a little bit more and uh when it was brought up he shut down his account for a while whoops i thought you understood i didn't think it had to say it i thought fuck i didn't think it had to say oh shit i thought fuck i didn't
Starting point is 01:36:26 think anybody knew about that oh yeah they have lots of documentaries and stuff everyone knows about that my bad jesus do you think that was like a fucking private thing haven't you heard a gang banging in little rock since banging in little rock since hbo undercover they've known about that shit 1989 was a big year for most people you fucking jerk big shit so he's he's still on the nuggets in 2009 and 10 jesus christ oh man wearing all that fucking blue and yellow has got to drive him nuts he hates it he's like man look at this i'm part blood i'm part crip i'm part latin king i don't like this at all i got gold mixed in here yeah golden fucking blue no good so 2009 2010 he they're 53 and 29 so teams under car will always go to the playoffs and they have carmelo anthony is a pretty good score it's
Starting point is 01:37:17 pretty helpful yeah they lose in six to the jazz in the first round though though. Either way, he plays in 75 games, starts zero of them. Again, he plays 27.8 minutes a game, so pretty much the same exact as last year. 15.4 points, 2.4 assists, 3.1 rebounds. Pretty much the same stats as well. Better money, though. $5,508,426 for Mr. J.R. It's so lucrative to play in the NBA.
Starting point is 01:37:44 God, it's so lucrative to be good at sports, isn't it? It's crazy. And huge and be able to fucking dunk with your forehead. Get that high in the air. It's unbelievable what you can achieve if you're just good at that sport. 2010 and 11, he continues to achieve this. They go 15-32. The Nuggets do. Go to the playoffs playoffs, losing the first round to the Thunder.
Starting point is 01:38:09 George Carl's mainly what he does here. This year, 79 games he plays in, only starts six of them, 12.3 points per game, which is down a little bit, but still not bad, 2.2 assists, 4.1 rebounds. So he's up a whole rebound, though. That's great yeah not too they might have told him to you know shade inside a little more yeah so six million seven hundred fifty seven thousand eight hundred fifty one dollars one more rebound one more
Starting point is 01:38:36 million wow that is awesome he is stacking shit right now july of 2011 he is um he is sort of i guess arrested but taken in on a traffic violation uh for op he's in miami for operating a scooter without a valid driver's license on the street on the street you fucking idiot just rented a vespa and he's out there running it around that's it fucked it up idiot so 2011 12 there's an nba lockout yeah and during that a couple of these guys went and played basketball in china oh including jr smith yeah he went over to china and he played for the oh jesus zhang zhang zhang golden bull Play shitloads of X's. Well, no, there's a Z-H and a J-I. So that's like a Zhe and a Zhe.
Starting point is 01:39:32 And I don't speak Chinese either, so it really hurts. I don't know that one. The Golden Bulls is who he's playing for. Not the Chicago Bulls, the Golden Bulls. It's mixing up the Warriors and the Bulls together. Yeah, it's the Golden Bull State. warriors and the bulls together yeah it's the golden bull state the golden bull state lakers it's great play for us come play for the celtics of the golden bull lakers so he spends almost a whole year there they pay him three million
Starting point is 01:40:01 dollars which is the most they've ever paid a player to come there three million three million dollars they're very very excited unfortunately he is fined over one million of that by the team in fuck ups and fine yeah he's such a fuck up over there that they take a third of his salary back in fines he was apparently terrible to coach he skipped they said just about every practice wow he just wouldn't go to practice um they said he missed over 80 practices in four months that's just just stop expecting him to even be there just don't even invite him anymore he's not coming don't tell me how many he missed tell me how many he made i'm guessing zero this is like they're like the guy who's leaving the office'm guessing zero this is like they're like the guy who's leaving the office like every friday night and they're telling like that chick in the
Starting point is 01:40:48 office hey we're all just going to like you know applebee's if you want to no you're about yeah that's cool we're just we'll be there all right okay you know just in case we'll be there for a couple hours or whatever and they just keep saying it and she's like yeah nope never even thought about going to applebee's actually that's what's here. Yeah, I'm not a fan of it. You expected me to go to practice? Many times they said he would skip practice to go shopping with his sister. Shopping. That's nice.
Starting point is 01:41:15 Instead. Instead. He also, one night, just to see what would happen, because the hotel rooms and shit were charged to the team, Just to see what would happen, because the hotel rooms and shit were charged to the team, he ordered $3,000 worth of room service by himself. Trey after Trey after Trey. He said, just to see if they would keep bringing it. That was his quote.
Starting point is 01:41:40 He just wanted to see if they would keep doing it or not, or if they'd be like, what the fuck's going on? But they're not going to say anything. They just keep bringing it. You're paying for it. We don't give a shit order ten thousand dollars worth of room service i kept buying cadillacs to see if they'd keep giving them to me yeah just to see if they'd go sir don't you have enough cadillacs by now no they'd be like we got a new model coming in you might be interested in they'll be fucking selling you more shit they're gonna sure you don't want to idiot it's called a business that's what i mean and it's a it's a the basketball team is an open sure you don't want to idiot it's called a business that's what i mean and
Starting point is 01:42:05 it's it's a the basketball team is an open account they don't care fucking order whatever you want just to see if they do it what you don't know that it works and it's china so they must have been really perplexed by it there's some some room service guy going downstairs going fucking american black people eat like a a lot they really eat. Like a bastard. I've never been around a black guy from America, but fuck do they eat, boy. Let me tell you something. Holy shit. No, he's on. He's calling again.
Starting point is 01:42:32 Look, the phone's ringing. There it is. Room 112. What's he want? He's all alone. He ordered four more dinners. This is crazy. There's no one else up there, man.
Starting point is 01:42:41 I swear. So that's how crazy he is. there's no one else up there man i swear so that's how crazy he is um he would do also he he's he gets injured at one point and people thought it was he was just faking it just to yeah you know not have to fucking be there and not have to do this shit he did play very well though in 32 games he averaged 34.4 points 7.4 rebounds.1 assists, and 2.5 steals per game. Yeah, it's crazy when nobody's guarding you. It's wild when no one else there is an NBA caliber person. That's crazy shit, right?
Starting point is 01:43:14 It's unbelievable to dunk on 13-year-old sized people. He scored 60 points one game with 14 three-pointers in a win over the Quing the quindow eagles the quindow evils eagles eagles not evils eagles he had four 50 point plus games during the season as well unbelievable he just did whatever the fuck he wanted over there i would just stay there and make three million a year forever who cares well this is amazing wait till you hear how much more money he's gonna make this is why we're not as successful as we could be this is what i mean we do what we think we go this is good here we're comfortable why press this is amazing why press that's how we are whereas he's like i'm only going to north carolina whereas we're like i mean we're okay
Starting point is 01:43:59 what do you got it's fine china makes probably cost nothing to live and you're making a fuck load of money to dunk on people all day. Yeah, you can order three grand worth of room service. They must have been super confused by that. So February 17, 2012, he is back in America as he signs with the New York Knicks. I didn't know that. Absolutely. Played here for a couple years.
Starting point is 01:44:20 I didn't know that. Absolutely. Played here for a couple years. That year in March, the very next month, he is suspended here by the league for a couple games. He posts a picture of a model that's apparently not safe for work type of thing. Tahiri Jones is her name. I don't know who she is. Who is she? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:44:48 T-A-H-I-R-Y Jones. Oh. No. Beats me. I don't know. Oh, I was thinking of B.B. Jones. Never mind. Go on. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:44:53 They fined him 25 grand, the league. For a naked girl on the internet. Yeah. Looks bad, I guess. The internet's full of them, but you can't share them? You can't show them, though. Okay. May of 2012, he is arrested in Miami Beach again.
Starting point is 01:45:10 This time for, guess what, a bench warrant. They arrest him again driving his scooter, and they realize, oh, that's J.R. Smith. We cited him last year, looked him up, realized he's got a bench warrant because he never took care of that shit last year for not having a license and he still doesn't have a license they pull him over he still doesn't have a goddamn license and he's got a bench warrant so they arrest him and he has to spend the night in jail so hilarious there you go nice move asshole what if it's a fucking moped fine pay it truly it's gotta be 30 bucks right you made six million dollars last year yeah what could it even be that's what i mean how much could that be even if it's a couple hundred who cares you're gonna go down there is he treating these tickets like room service to
Starting point is 01:45:53 see if they keep giving them maybe they'll see if they keep giving them to me maybe they'll keep giving them to me i guess as many times as i break the law it's like room service they'll just keep arresting you as many times as you want to break the law, they'll keep arresting you. There's no limit. They don't go, again? Well, I'm tired of arresting him. Never mind. Let him run amok.
Starting point is 01:46:11 Yeah, fuck it. He didn't learn his lesson the first time, so I guess screw it. Is that what you're thinking that happened? No. Taking a real, taking a real, just a dumb approach to this. A weird thing to do. I'm giving them to you man you're earning them wow jesus that's just procrastination so the knicks this year 36 and 30 in the shortened season
Starting point is 01:46:31 obviously here uh they go to the playoffs and lose in the first round to the miami heat carmelo anthony is on the team this year see he's oh he's always got his he goes from here to the calves where lebron is he's always got his guy bringing him from here to the Cavs where LeBron is. He's always got his guy bringing him in that wants their, he's the guy that they hang out with. He's their second banana. So that's the way it works. Does the R and J, J-R stand for Robin? Just Robin.
Starting point is 01:46:56 It is. It's Robin. My middle name is Joseph and Robin. My real name is Earl Joseph Robin Smith. So Carmelo Anthony, Mike Bibby, Tyson Chandler, Baron Davis on this squad. Bibby was there? Yeah, Bibby was here in his 13th season. Wow.
Starting point is 01:47:13 So Jeremy Lin on this team and Amari Stoudemire. So a lot of guys on this Knicks squad here. He plays in 35 games, starts one. He 12.5 points a game that year so not too bad makes 2 million 382 353 dollars so a little less that's fine 9 11 of this year 9 11 uh-huh he puts out a a post on instagram um it was a response this is fucking amazing it was he meant this this was his honoring 9-11 tweet oh god because the league encourages them to support yeah yeah so he said jesus and i quote celebrate the deaths of the people in 9-11 exclamation point hashtag we love you
Starting point is 01:48:03 hashtag we will never forget is it a furniture sale fucking post what is he doing he said celebrate the deaths of the people in 9-11 exclamation point which makes it so, like, it makes it so much more gregarious. Yay! And then, we will love you, we will never forget, we love you, we will never forget. So you're like, did he mean that the fucking way he thought? You can't hashtag we love you if you can't name a single person that died that day. That's what I mean.
Starting point is 01:48:44 And that's crazy man we will never forget and new york post said jr what are you smoking they tweeted other news said oh jr you poor son of a bitch uh people said you idiot jr on the other hand let's give them it in their own words let's let him try to explain this tweet because that is the hardest to explain tweet god damn it that's like a comedian said the n word and then tried to get out of it he said in their own words quote people knew what i was trying to say but of course everyone is going to react because it's me now i now i gotta go meet with the general manager i I got the coach asking me what I'm doing on social media.
Starting point is 01:49:28 Just a giant headache. Yeah. Yeah. You said, let's celebrate the deaths of the people who died in 9-11. Not let's celebrate the people who died. Let's not celebrate the lives. You said celebrate the
Starting point is 01:49:43 deaths. It sounds like you're literally partying over a corpse it's like weekend at bernie's now what is going on it's like they blew the towers were candles and they just blew them out this is a big day finally it's here what a fucking idiot did he just say that i can't believe we only had we only had fourth of july and christmas to really all come together now we've got an extra day that's it we can celebrate the deaths of these fine people what a fucking does he think that's what memorial day is for let's celebrate the deaths of all that have served before us to preserve you know is that what
Starting point is 01:50:26 they think that's about what a fucking dipshit holy shit how do you explain that, man? Celebrate the deaths of the people of 9-11. We love you. You'll never forget. People knew what I was trying to say. Do they? Do they really? No, we didn't.
Starting point is 01:51:00 I don't think we know what you're trying to say, bro. Holy shit, he's so dumb. But of of course everyone's gonna react because it's me anyone who said that would have got a reaction oh anyone i just slipped a disc in my neck laughing at you you idiot if betty white tweeted that people be like do you have fucking alzheimer's or what's your problem bet what the fuck man we thought she was nice this whole time turns out turns out she's a real twat, man. What the fuck? Dolly Parton could turn us against her with that tweet.
Starting point is 01:51:31 Anybody could be like, at least you'd go, what the fuck are you talking about? Celebrate the Dabs, you fucking moron. You sure about that, Morgan Freeman? You really sure about that? You want to say that? I don't think you want to say that. I don't think you want to say that, Will Smith. Ooh, too late.
Starting point is 01:51:48 Never mind. That's already. Never mind. We think you meant that, Will. Never mind. Now we think you meant that. 2012-2013 season. How do you even recover from that?
Starting point is 01:51:58 But he plays for the Knicks. And, oh, he says something dumber coming up this season. Stop it. You want to hear something publicly dumber that he said? I got it here for you. So 2012-13, 54-28. This is the best the Knicks were in fucking since 97 probably or 99 when they went to the finals in that strike-shortened season. Anyway, they win a fucking playoff series.
Starting point is 01:52:23 Holy shit, against the Celtics, too. So that's cool. And then they lose to the Pacers, which that sucks, in six. What year was that? 2013. Is that Reggie's last year? 2012, 13. Fuck, I don't remember.
Starting point is 01:52:37 It may have been. That was before that. That was well before that, Reggie's last year. Yeah, no, no. Reggie's last year was earlier. Because his last year was the year after the malice at the palace thing wasn't it was in 04 that was in 05 6 yeah because this uh gone i think 80 87 draft was reggie miller something like that so he was around i'm just
Starting point is 01:52:58 trying to think of who the fuck was on the pacers that was any good this time jesus christ i don't know but they were doing well um january 26th 2013 in the middle of this season he okay um he gets in his fucking dms uh at real jr smith by the way on twitter and instagram yeah he gets a woman sent him a DM saying, I'm going to your game tonight. That's all they say. He says, dope. That's cool. Oh, boy. Dope. So she sends back a smiley face.
Starting point is 01:53:37 Yeah. Just a smiley face. He sends back, oh, really? He sends back, oh, really? She says, oh, really, what? With like a smirky smiling emoji. Like, what are you talking about? His response to that is, and I quote, you trying to get the pipe?
Starting point is 01:54:12 Oh, God, it hurts. It's something I was saying. i can't even breathe today you're trying to get the pipe he says that is that is a question reserved for 2 30 a.m at bar close and you're and you're both wasted you don't say that shit say if a chick dry humps you at two o'clock in the morning at a bar and she's like you're hot and so you'd be like you're trying to get that pipe yeah that's sort of acceptable at that point she said i came to your game that's all dope smiley oh really oh really what i don't know what that means you You're trying to get that dick. What? The pipe is even worse than the dick, isn't it? I think it is. The pipe's the most construction worker fucking praise for it. That's true.
Starting point is 01:54:55 Well, you have to like excavate for a pipe. It sounds like he's going to tear out the whole infrastructure in there with a pipe. He's going to pipe. That's a lot. You're trying to get to the pipe, aren't you? You're ripping out the drywall with those smarts trying to get that pipe oh my god so she oh jesus puts him publicly on blast for this because she apparently was not trying to get any pipe she was just a fan of the team she's just trying to see if she can get a reply from a fucking blue checkmark. That's all. You know, she said no thank you on the pipe, though.
Starting point is 01:55:28 I'm all full up. I'm all full up on pipe. He's suspended for two games by the team for doing that because you stop trying to fuck our fans on Instagram, please. Thank you. Jesus, Chris, she's a season ticket holder for Christ's sake. He plays in 80 games that year, though. Besides the two he was suspended, whole season.
Starting point is 01:55:48 Starts zero of them, though. But he does score 18.1 points a game this year. Wow. Sixth man. 2.7 assists, 5.3 rebounds. His career best by over a rebound. He makes $2,806,452. career best by over a rebound yeah he he makes two million eight hundred six thousand four hundred fifty two dollars and he wins the nba sixth man of the year absolutely with 18 points a game how
Starting point is 01:56:12 do you not zero starts dominating 33.5 minutes too so he's playing a lot i mean that's a fucking that starters play that that's a lot um so july 10 2013 he's a free agent his contract right out he's re-signs with the knicks um september 6 2013 he uh tests positive for marijuana and is suspended for five games which is so fucking stupid yeah but if we if we think that he hasn't been smoking weed this whole time are we out of our fucking minds it's right and the n minds? That was just an open secret. We knew these guys are smoking weed. Nobody fucking cares. Who gives a shit?
Starting point is 01:56:50 It's not a contact sport. You can get high and shoot three-pointers. It's fine. It really is. Jackson playing for Indianapolis. I've never played a game that I wasn't high, he said. That's how he played better. Whatever it is, this is just stupid, though.
Starting point is 01:57:07 Yeah, he's test positive, so they suspend him for five. Now it's not a thing anymore in the NBA. They don't test for weed anymore. But they said that, yeah, he's got to whatever. He gets suspended for that. So 2013-14 with the Knicks. They're 37-45 that year. Joining the team this year is Chris Smith, his brother.
Starting point is 01:57:27 Really? Yeah, pretty cool, right? That's pretty cool. Yeah, they signed him. He only plays two games for them, though. He plays one minute. He's on the team for two games, and he plays one minute. That sounds like a favor to JR.
Starting point is 01:57:39 Yeah. You know what I mean? One minute. But how many people did he kill? He might have killed seven people. We don't know. Yeah, we'll see I mean? One minute. But how many people did he kill? He might have killed seven people. We don't know. Yeah. We'll see what his father, how his father puts that.
Starting point is 01:57:47 And, you know, they backed off from him. You know what I mean? Yeah. He got in some close contact with some new friends, and the team backed off from him. Right. Yeah. So he had 0.0 rebound, 0 assist, 0 anything. He only played for a minute.
Starting point is 01:58:01 He played for one minute. That's tough. Yeah. He just, that's nothing. And that could have been one, like, he inbounded it, and that's a minute. He played for one minute. That's nothing. That could have been one like he inbounded it. That's a minute. That's what that's called in the books here.
Starting point is 01:58:11 JR, on the other hand, 74 games, starts half of them, 37. 32.7 minutes a game, 14.5 points, 3 assists, 4 rebounds. Not bad. $5,565,000. Wow. November 14th, three assists four rebounds not bad five million five hundred sixty five thousand dollars wow november uh 14th 15th he suspended a game on some there's some junior on junior violence here they're trying to going for junior supremacy where he elbows glenn rice jr in the balls
Starting point is 01:58:41 during the game he's had a boy that played basketball? Absolutely, yeah. He's playing for the Wizards, and I watched the play. He's dribbling and holding his body between Glenn Rice and the ball, and he just shoves his elbow out and elbows him right in the fucking balls. Right in the dick. Yeah, it was pretty fucking funny. So anyway, they suspend him for there. Then January 5, 2015, they've kind of had it with the shenanigans, it seems like, on the Knicks here.
Starting point is 01:59:08 Maybe him being at home isn't good for him, being so close to home. So they trade him. Three-team deal with the Knicks. He's traded by the Knicks with Shumpert to the Cavs. The Cavs got, Jesus Christ, who fucking cares? It's a bunch of second-line guys. And in the end, the Cavs get J. The Cavs got, oh, Jesus Christ, who fucking cares? It's a bunch of second line guys and in the end,
Starting point is 01:59:27 the Cavs get J.R. Smith. Wow. The Cavs get the K. There you go. The K, well, he won't. The hard part is getting the magic marker over the jersey
Starting point is 01:59:35 all the time. That's the real, he loved playing for the Knicks. He said, that's great, but he will, Cleveland, he's like,
Starting point is 01:59:41 son of a fucking. Two C's, Jesus, the city and the team. There's a reason I didn't go to UCon like, son of a fucking. Two Cs? Jesus. The city and the team. There's a reason I didn't go to UConn, people. Fuck this. Not doing it. The color's right, but come on. Can we pass some legislation to change the city to Cleveland with a K?
Starting point is 01:59:57 And the Cavaliers with a, you know what I mean. So they're 53 and 29 that year. This is the team with LeBron and fucking a bunch of Kyrie Irving is on this team. Kevin Love. Sean Marion's on this team in his 15th year. Holy shit. Sean Marion played for the Cavs? Apparently, briefly, 15th year there.
Starting point is 02:00:15 Wow. So first round, they sweep the Celtics in the playoffs. They beat the Bulls in six with Derrick Rose when he still could walk. So Eastern Conference Finals, they sweep the Hawks. What? Yeah, they swept the Hawks. Can you imagine the Hawks then? I was like, the Hawks were in the finals then?
Starting point is 02:00:32 Yeah, I can't remember. Oh, you know what? They had Joe from the Suns. Yeah, they were good for a minute. Yeah, Joe Johnson. Yeah, Joe Johnson. Yeah, and that team was actually pretty decent. Wasn't bad.
Starting point is 02:00:43 Yeah, for five or so minutes. Then they go to the finals and lose to the Warriors in six. Really? Joe Johnson. Yeah, that team was actually pretty decent. Wasn't bad. Yep, for five or so minutes. Yeah. Then they go to the finals and lose to the Warriors in six. Really? Yeah, that was the first. That was the first season, yeah. Yep. So there's that.
Starting point is 02:00:53 That year, 46 games he plays for the Cavs, 12.7 per game. You know, he contributes pretty well. He contributes, or they contribute a lot to his bank account, though. He makes $6,516,000 that year. Oh, my. pretty well he contributes or they contribute a lot to his bank account though he makes six million five hundred sixteen thousand dollars that oh my and uh signs a deal and all this type of shit he's also got a statement on partying okay you know he's he's got he he feels like he's been targeted and he's he's upset um do you know why i think that why is that because he says quote for me i feel like a target every time he's he's there's no subtext with him it's all text he said quote so i try to handle
Starting point is 02:01:33 myself with care when i'm out and about by the way keep that in mind for the next couple things that we talk about with him it's one of those situations when you're out at four in the morning holy shit why would you exactly what's going to happen to him is what he's saying when you're out at four in the morning. Holy shit. Why would you? Exactly what's going to happen to him is what he's saying. When you're out at four in the morning, there's no way you should be walking anywhere again. He's basically saying, I shouldn't do what I'm going to do, but I'm going to do it anyway. Get in your car and go home or wherever you're going. That's one of my cardinal rules. You don't just stand outside of events.
Starting point is 02:02:02 You get in and you go and you keep it moving okay then he said you know it's not fair that people should have to uh you know fucking not go out not do things he said we get in late from flights sometimes what are we supposed to do we just go sit in a room you know you gotta unwind he said yes yeah true quote we fly in late all the time so then we go out late guys just like to have a good time. Just like the average college student. Except we're 30. That's the difference.
Starting point is 02:02:31 Yeah, average college student. Wow. It just so happens that we get a lot of money, we're young and famous, and people want to see us, and we like to be seen. It just comes with the territory. Yeah, but he doesn't get it. everything he just said yeah it's hilarious okay so um then they talk about well now you're in cleveland because he was like in new york it was hard because you know it's new york so you want people everywhere yeah cleveland this is great he says cleveland's so terrible it's the best situation for him. I'm not even kidding.
Starting point is 02:03:06 People disappear here, you guys, and nobody cares. No one even notices. They'll just fall in the lake and dissolve. What's that lake made of? We don't know. He said, or the river. He said, I think it's the best situation for me. I think this is the best situation for me because there's nothing but basketball.
Starting point is 02:03:22 There's nothing you expect but basketball. There's nothing. No going basketball. There's nothing. No going out. There's no late nights. There's video games, basketball, and basketball. So it's a great thing because I go back to where I'm from. When I grew up, I was never, ever allowed to go out. I missed my prom because I went to an AAU tournament and all that stuff.
Starting point is 02:03:43 For me, it was basketball basketball basketball so he's like being in cleveland is like being under the thumb of a domineering father who has control over your entire life because it's the same amount of socializing you could do because there's nothing to fucking do here that's why lebron's so successful there's fucking nothing here there's nothing here um so he gets married in 2016 in august of 2016 that's right someone is getting that pipe on a regular basis um he's got a daughter from a previous relationship they're gonna have a couple more kids all girls so far um their second daughter by the way we'll talk about born in 2017 so a little ahead in our timeline which only weighed one pound
Starting point is 02:04:26 at birth oh my god yeah it's it's pretty crazy uh carmelo anthony and chris paul are the godfathers of his first two daughters too by the way well that's nice they're getting good gifts for the rest of their lives all right not too shabby let's set them up with some nice birthday presents november 20th 2015 4 a.m oh god what time did he say you shouldn't be out a.m 4 a.m where is he in the street outside of a pizza place at 4 a.m okay uh some of that dough to soak up the booze artichoke basil's pizza at 4 a.m uh is i guess open so and i apparently there is a celebrity hangout on the same block where it's like a club or some shit i don't know so there's a kid here um oh no that's the other
Starting point is 02:05:13 okay this is the one in i'm sorry this is the new york one at 4 a.m okay yes this is the pizza place okay good got that here the other ones are all open at 4 a.m in new york okay there's a teenage kid who lives in harlem all right uh named justin brown here he ends up jesus christ he apparently um asked jr for a said yeah let me get a picture with you you know you know and put it on social media let me do whatever the fuck he wanted to do smith ignores them and keeps on walking right yeah so at that point this kid yells that's why new york kicked you out yo that's what that's what happens man you gotta put up with that in new york yeah so then he grabs the kid and apparently allegedly for puts basically checks him with his forearm against the building and then chokes and puts his hands around his neck and starts choking him.
Starting point is 02:06:10 Apparently, a police report was filed three days later. This is all alleged. When the guy went to the 10th precinct station house, they said that the initial the cops told him the initial report was lost, by the way. No, no. This kid reported it. Then he went back three days initial report was lost, by the way. Oh, no. This kid reported it. Then he went back three days later and they went, oh, sorry, we lost the initial report. Welcome to New York. Thanks a lot.
Starting point is 02:06:35 His lawyer, the kid who got choked, he called the kid, quote, sweet, and said the teen did nothing to deserve this attack. He said using your physical dominance to inflict pain and instill fear into somebody who is clearly weaker than you is unacceptable in any context. But there's something sick about doing it to a kid who's asking you
Starting point is 02:06:53 to take a picture with him. Right. Yeah. And all he did was say that's why we kicked you out. That's why we fucking didn't want you anymore. Fuck you.
Starting point is 02:07:03 I'm sure he gets said worse shit to him all the time. Oh, yeah. At a game. So his lawyer, J.R.'s lawyer, said the allegation is completely false. He won't be arrested. He said my client did nothing wrong. He didn't choke him.
Starting point is 02:07:16 There's no arrest warrant. I don't expect him to be arrested. J.R. Smith immediately went to Twitter and said, don't believe everything you read. That's right.R. Smith immediately went to Twitter and said, don't believe everything you read. That's right. Absolutely. And so the team said the team had no response to it. They were like, we don't want to talk about this. Teen sues him at this point for two and a half million dollars.
Starting point is 02:07:38 Oh, that's a little excessive. That's steep for a joke. that's steep for a joke in a during the video of him doing all this because they're talking i guess i think he's on he's on snapchat i want to say or some shit but it's do they have snapchat in 2016 i think it's right in the beginning of it they have it yes it might be it might it might be uh even uh instagram live right i think it's snapchat and specific though i think he's doing that shit and he's doing something at the moment and jr smith walks by and so this all happened in kind of real time on social media yeah so i guess you can be heard you can hear the kid on the video say quote i'm going to get jr to punch me and sue him for fifty thousand dollars oh you dumb shit so but jr still he know he just said you can't be walking
Starting point is 02:08:22 around at four o'clock in the morning. People are stupid. They try to get in your shit. Exactly. This is exactly the situation you were warned against, so don't fucking bite. Don't bite. They're trying to get you to do this. So anyway, that particular clip did not show J.R. Smith choking him. This was a different cell phone video.
Starting point is 02:08:40 So that's how they went. Now, on LeBron, he loves LeBron. He says, quote, it's like big brother, little lebron he loves lebron he says quote it's like big brother little brother that's what jr says yeah majority of the time it's big brother who has the talent and all and has it all the younger brother has talent too but he only gets looked at because of the older brother right he understands his fucking role in basketball so it's a real dotty and kit ke Keller thing. It is. It is. Yeah, Kit can pitch.
Starting point is 02:09:06 It's fine. So LeBron, he backs this up. He said, J.R. is definitely my brother. His family is my family. His girls are like my nieces. When you meet special people that mean something to you and that are true, that's when you know you have a friend for life. So LeBron fucking loves him. And they told J.R. that lebron said that about him and jr said quote he's basketball royalty so coming from him it
Starting point is 02:09:33 means the world from time the time i've met him it's been nothing but encouragement that's an amazing quality to have if you show people that you believe in them and feel for them that's a true quality what better can you give your friends an encouragement for guys like us? So many people want to be around you because of who you are. He really loves to tell you how fucking in demand he is as a human being, especially with Braun. But it's like, thanks,
Starting point is 02:09:58 bro, but I don't really need anything from you. I got my own money. I got my own family. That's how you know our friendship is genuine. I don't ask for much or need much. all i really need is peace of mind and conversation jesus christ so he loves me and i love him and we spoon on the road and i made 30 million dollars so i've also yeah lebron's making everyone knows who i am now. Isn't that pretty cool? So 2015-16, 57-25 for the Cavs with a K.
Starting point is 02:10:27 They sweep the Pistons in the first round of the playoffs, sweep the Hawks in the second round. They win in six over Toronto in the Eastern Conference Finals, and then it goes all the way to seven. That was an amazing game seven, by the way, against the Warriors there. That was a really good series. That's the one with LeBron with the powder, right? He did that all the time.
Starting point is 02:10:49 Is that where it came from? Is that where that one came from? He did that all the time. Unlike the clip, though, you know what I'm talking about? Maybe. I'm not sure. This was the Kyrie Irving hitting. He was fucking unconscious at the end, hitting those fucking threes and shit.
Starting point is 02:10:59 Yeah, that was wild. But they beat Golden State. Yeah. During the celebrations for the finals victory he is just wandering around he as soon as the fucking game ended he took his shirt off for some reason and he's just wandering around with no shirt on and everyone else is shirted in this entire production except for him shirtless so when at the time president President Obama called to congratulate the coach there, he called to talk to Tyrone Liu, Obama made a reference to Smith's not having a shirt. He's like, why doesn't your guy have a shirt on all the time?
Starting point is 02:11:34 That's pretty funny. So everyone noticed this shit. And that became very famous. So then he had a shirt made that was a T-shirt of him without a shirt. It was his torso. Yeah, with all his tattoos. And sheshirt of him without a shirt. It was his torso. Yeah, with all his tattoos. And she's got a ton of tattoos. That's his thing.
Starting point is 02:11:49 So 2015-16, that season, he started all 77 games he played in that year. Wow. 12.4 points, 1.7 assists, 2.8 rebounds, played 30.7 minutes a game, and made a cool even $5 million. Fantastic. Not too shabby. And then he says, he's got it all, Jimmy. You know how I know that he thinks he has it all?
Starting point is 02:12:12 Quote, I had everything. He had it all. Yeah. That's it. He said, we had just won the title. I just got married, signed my deal. It was everything I ever wanted. Everything.
Starting point is 02:12:21 Got married, signed my deal. It was everything I ever wanted. Everything. And then they were, when their daughter was born, Dakota, the third daughter, born prematurely, weighing 16 ounces. Exactly a pound? Fucking terrifying. And that neonatal, my daughter was in the neonatal unit because she had to be born early because my ex had the hyper. Yeah. No, preeclampsia, preeclampsia so god jesus that sounds yeah oh she almost died uh while giving birth i mean yeah she almost had a stroke like they got her in there immediately and had to induce her and it was
Starting point is 02:12:57 bad shit and uh nick you oh yeah we were in the neonatal icu for it was fucking it's terrifying in there yeah the most terrifying place in a hospital spend a couple days in the neonatal ICU for it was fucking it's terrifying in there. Yeah. The most terrifying place in a hospital. Spend a couple of days in a neonatal ICU and fucking it's terrifying. So that's where they are. And this is like, you know, this is horrible. Their child is not even it's very small. This little poor little girl. So he says there were so many doctors coming up to me.
Starting point is 02:13:22 They were asking me if they should perform life saving procedures. If her heart stopped, I was like, I was like, yes. Why are you asking me this? This is my daughter. Do whatever you can to save her life. Like, nah, I mean, if she just, I mean, I do it three times. I can probably do it again. If she's just flusher at this point, if she stops, you know, just flusher.
Starting point is 02:13:41 We don't even need to make a big deal out of this. What the fuck? Of course. Save my child. We'd be like a goldfish. Would you like us to save your daughter's life? Nah. Nah.
Starting point is 02:13:52 Would you sign this for a DNR? She's 16 ounces, man. How are we going to? What kind of cold-hearted question is that? God damn it. That's the, he had a very, for once, he had a reasonable response to something what are you out of your fucking mind of course what he has treating me like i'm gonna celebrate the death yeah celebrate the deaths it's not like it's 9-11 jesus i could see if she worked at the colman sacks or something but
Starting point is 02:14:19 what is she on the 93rd floor or something come on jesus christ man celebrate the deaths of 9-11 that is wild what a dumb shit is what's dumber that or you trying to get some pipe what's dumber i think it's pretty close right celebrate the deaths is pretty awesome that's pretty good i mean going from emoji conversation to are you trying to get the body trying to get that pipe he said no i'm with you i got off on the pipe thing i'm i'm obsessed with it it's hilarious he said i'm not pretending i'm an angel i made those mistakes i did they made me who i am but at the same time uh i would the same time, would I take back some of them? Of course I would.
Starting point is 02:15:06 I started to think about who I was, he said. It's almost like a split personality. JR is kind of like a character I play, but Earl Smith is the family man. The homebody who's more chill and laid back and doesn't go out. I think it's been building my whole life, but I probably realized it when I first got here. You start to look at yourself and try to figure out who you are and your life begins to change. I'm a sensitive person. I was tired of everything going wrong.
Starting point is 02:15:34 Things affect me. I'm probably the most sensitive dude I know. You don't count in people you know, sir. I'm the most sensitive dude in county wow i'm the most handsome motherfucker i know the richest motherfucker i know what of oh my god he does have some rick james in him he does so he said a lot of his past and some of his oh this is his old coach on the knicks here a lot of his past and some of the things he's done uh they're they're remembering stuff from six or seven years ago.
Starting point is 02:16:06 But are you learning from your mistakes? Also six or seven months ago because that other shit just happened. He said, when players do things to put themselves out there, you can quickly be prejudged. There are consequences for what you do. Don't put yourself in a position you might regret. I stayed
Starting point is 02:16:22 on him a lot about that. I kept telling him, everyone is always watching. Stay off social media. Every time something bit him in the butt, I was there to say, I told you so. And he says that the same thing. They ask him about social media
Starting point is 02:16:36 and JR says, you know what? Maybe I need to be Earl. Maybe that's the thing. He said, quote, I definitely worry about something else happening. It's one of the ways you stay curious.
Starting point is 02:16:46 I don't let it deter me from living my everyday life, but I still think about it. He says at one point he thinks about it. He says, should I post this? Should I wear this shirt? How will this affect somebody? Anything I post, would I wear that on a shirt? That's what he says. He says, sometimes I ask my wife or friend, if you have a second thought, then you shouldn't do it. That's what he says sometimes i ask a wife my wife or friend uh if you have a second thought then you
Starting point is 02:17:05 shouldn't do it that's what he says he says then he says quote i'd rather be earl than jr okay he's earl jimmy that's the same guy sir you know what i would say ego you fucking dipshit you know what i would say he's declaring what is that i'm good now i'm Earl. I'm Earl now. That's what he's declaring. Not even I'm good now. Just I'm Earl now. I'm Earl now. I'm Earl now. That's amazing. One of his coaches said he acknowledged his reputation was earned. He wasn't wronged by the existence of his reputation. He earned it. He was the sum of all those things. But he made a conscious decision that he didn't want to be that anymore and changed his life in a profoundly positive way that's right and he says now his main goal is to not disappoint lebron sure he's i don't want to disappoint my meal ticket i can hang on to him until i can't play anymore and i'll always be on his team if he wants me there they'll'll sign me. That's it. They got an extra roster spot for friend of LeBron, period. So he says the coach, oh, this is the GM of the Cavs, said, quote, I don't know if we make that trade, which is the trade that got him,
Starting point is 02:18:17 without that alpha in the locker room. I don't know if we do it without LeBron. He said if you have LeBron, you can take a risk on a guy who's got some questionable character because basically he's gonna have to fall into line because lebron's gonna fucking run the team because lebron's trying to take this shit serious yeah he's like come on guys for real we're actually playing so lebron is a brand and jr smith. No, he does have a shitload of money we'll talk about. So 2016-17, the Cavs go 51-31. They beat the Pacers. They beat the Raptors.
Starting point is 02:18:50 They beat the Celtics. First three rounds of the playoffs, they only lost one game. Wow. Yeah, 12-1 there. And then they go to the finals for the big rematch against the Warriors and losing five. So it's really a huge That was a huge letdown. It was such a letdown. It was just like, oh, that wasn't as good of a series.
Starting point is 02:19:08 12-1 to losing five? Ouch. Yikes. He plays in 41 games because he's got some injury problems. Starts 35. Averages 8.6 points a game in 29 minutes. Not great. But his salary is fantastic.
Starting point is 02:19:23 $12,800 thousand dollars for this season oh my god more millions than points per game that's insane he makes this year that's a lot and he's back to driving like shit again uh let's get to that october 12 2017 police stop his 2016 dodge challenger at about 1 20 a.m. And this is the day before the Cavs were going to play their final preseason game. And yeah, his car sped through a construction zone at about 1.15
Starting point is 02:19:54 p.m. And yeah, they found him about two minutes later because it had been dispatched, called in from somebody else about it. A.M.? A.M., sorry. A.M., A.M. And he was speeding at the point where they pulled him over he was speeding as well yeah and yeah he got a traffic ticket he was speeding on the i-90 and it's sped by a cruiser and i got him like like multiple people were like hey you find that
Starting point is 02:20:18 asshole speeding oh yeah he's all over the place i literally just drove that stretch of freeway last week that's That's hilarious. Right through Cleveland. I was going to say, not in Florida. Oh, yeah, no, this is in Cleveland. Yeah, it's I-90 right through Cleveland. So basically the cop turns around and goes and gets him as J.R. is pulling into a friend's driveway. You're almost there.
Starting point is 02:20:41 Okay. So he – I'm sorry, not his friend's driveway, his neighbor's driveway. It's by his house. So he was trying to get home. The police end up giving him field sobriety tests, but he apparently passes the field sobriety test, but admits that he's been drinking at some point during the night. But he passes the field sobriety test. So he's not charged with any form of intoxicated driving. Something like dinner, whatever.
Starting point is 02:21:06 sobriety test so he's not charged with any form of intoxicated driving whatever yeah yeah a family member of his was allowed to come over and get his car and drive it home because it's like down the street from his house and he gets a speeding ticket so he did go out and drink and then speed which was dumb all of that stupid he he should be taking ubers everywhere through a construction site james where they probably work those construction sites at night to minimize the traffic yeah yeah and you can't see those people right you can't be drinking and driving near people that are fucking on foot are you out of your mind christ with heavy equipment around right he's charged with reckless driving and excessive speeding so that's not great. He pleads not guilty here to a charge of willful or wanton disregard of safety also. So, yeah, that's how that goes.
Starting point is 02:21:51 2017-18, 50-32 for the Cavs. They beat the Pacers in seven games. It took seven games in the first round to beat the Pacers. Then they sweep Toronto in the next round. Then they go seven with Boston and win. Jesus. Yeah, and then go to the finals again against Golden State. Exhausted now.
Starting point is 02:22:11 Oh, God, yeah, Jesus Christ. And lose, they get swept. Yeah, how are you going to play? How are you going to chase them around the court when you've just gone almost seven in every fucking season? Absolutely, and also they're a bit distracted during the playoffs. Why is that? in every fucking season.
Starting point is 02:22:22 Absolutely. And also, they're a bit distracted during the playoffs. Why is that? Because J.R. Smith, on May 2, 2018, is suspended for a game after he throws a bowl of soup at assistant coach Damon Jones. What? He's got walking soup?
Starting point is 02:22:41 He threw a bowl of soup. I don't know if it's from a seated position, which would make it even more aggressive just like you pick it up off a table and be like you motherfucker or if he was walking around i don't know what happened but he he threw a bowl of soup at his coach which isn't really advisable was there a chunky chunky soup fucking shoot at practice or something why this could have been part of a promo you know what i mean it's good yeah when they show a coach how many times how many times you've been in a group setting where there's soup around
Starting point is 02:23:11 that's what i'm saying dinner yeah i guess but they all they always have like these like kind of hot tables set up almost like at a like a like a like backstage at like a film shoot or something they have like a craft table almost like a craft services at at a film shoot or something they have like a craft table almost like a craft services at at these arenas for these athletes they're so particular they need fucking soup different things every day yeah different things some days they might want soup soup well if you say if you laugh at soup it could be anything fucking sandwiches they have a sandwich well i can see what's so weird about soup when you go out they say super salad it's one of the two options and it's easy you can make a big thing of soup a pot and stick it there and anybody can scoop
Starting point is 02:23:54 some soup up and eat it i don't think it's a weird thing to serve young guys who play basketball i bet they want soup is a weird thought but if if you're going to set up a buffet, I've never been to a buffet that doesn't have soup on the end of its own. That's a great point. So that's the other thing. In the grocery store, they got that fucking cart there. There's people eating that soup, right? They've got to be. They wouldn't be there if it didn't sell.
Starting point is 02:24:17 Otherwise, it's the same soup. It's like the same vegetable minestrone, like fucking just on a constant boil on on a roll for like 16 years it's not even it's not even chunky anymore it's all that all the it's all worn away all the zucchinis just liquefied little meat speckles throughout the whole thing that used to be chunks it's non-junkie so uh that year anyway 8.3 points a game 8.3 points a game that season for him but he makes 13 million 760 thousand dollars wow and somebody caught a bowl of soup in the chest for that yeah wow this he also uh there's a lawsuit apparently that gets filed because apparently milwaukee bucks guard Sterling Brown.
Starting point is 02:25:05 Do you remember this? He got tased a few years ago. No. The video came out. He sued the police department in Milwaukee. It was a big deal. Well, one of the cops around here. Where is this?
Starting point is 02:25:19 Yeah. I guess he had double parked at a Walgreens or something. They ended up tasing this basketball player. Wow. he had double parked at a Walgreens or something and they ended up tasing this basketball player wow so some other cop came out and said that quote I hope J.R. Smith double parks in Walgreens handicapped parking spots when he's in Milwaukee that's what the cop who tased the other guy said wow and so there was a lawsuit over that would they they sued him for saying that i guess the city did or something right yeah well yeah it's the cops can't want to tase somebody in particular it's pretty funny though i i hope he fucks up so i can tase him i don't think you're supposed to say that that's the quiet part you don't say that shit out loud that's crazy so july 29th 2018 2, 2.45 a.m.
Starting point is 02:26:05 Oh, boy. Outside of a pizza place. Oh, JR. It's the only frequent pizza place in the middle of the night. After Taco Bell closes at 2, you got to eat somewhere, right? I guess so. He's in New York again here. There's a 20-year-old guy from Pennsylvania.
Starting point is 02:26:23 It's a busy block. And he apparently recognized J.R. Smith walking by and oh this is the Snapchat guy the other guy was just doing a cell phone video this guy tried to record J.R. Smith using Snapchat and was like hey J.R. Smith man you want to say hi so
Starting point is 02:26:37 he alleges that J.R. Smith responded by rather than going yeah or no or go fuck yourself by just grabbing the phone and throwing it across 10th Avenue into a construction zone just like across 10th Avenue over the fence of a construction zone and into the site uh breaking the screen put this in the bridge too yeah he said nope there you go there's Snapchat. It's going to have a really cool shot at the end there while it spins through the air. Then this guy flagged down two patrol officers who looked around for J.R. Smith.
Starting point is 02:27:13 But by then he was all gone and they couldn't find him. He's out of there. So, I mean, this is fucking ridiculous. J.R. They can't even find him. He disappears into the night like a ghost. Like Robin would. Yeah, like Robin. Like a cell phone tossing Robin.
Starting point is 02:27:28 And it's crazy. No one knows where he is. No one can find him except one person can find him. And that's God, Jimmy, God. God finds him and he has words for J.R. Smith. And God says. How is it you've come to arrive here, J.R. Smith? What are you doing, man? What the fuck is wrong with you? I'm sorry, but listen, I've gone out on a limb for you. Honestly, I did. I made you six foot six. You know how many people are six foot six? Very few. You
Starting point is 02:28:10 have hair still. You're amazing. You have pipe to give. Pipe to give. I give you pipe, height, and hair. This is how you repay me? With your insolence? No. I even saved you. I saved your daughter's life. Do you understand that? I was listening. I was like, J.R., I heard you the first time. It's done. OK, calm the fuck down. You kept talking and talking. It's fine. This is how you repay me. Going out and pizza places, throwing phones into play. I killed your friend for you. Do you understand that? I did that so you could live. That's how this works. See? It gave you strength. What's the thing that gave you the most strength? Going forward from that.
Starting point is 02:28:52 Exactly. Right. Yes. Plan. This guy right here. Ever hear of that? Plan. Long, long plan.
Starting point is 02:28:59 That's how it works with me. So anyway, I have to go cause a flood in the Midwest. I'll be back soon though. Stop, don't go to pizza places at 2 and 45 AM. Get a Grubhub or Uber Eats, DoorDash possibly. I don't know. Whatever. Get home. You have a daughter who weighs like four pounds right now. That's, you need to go take care of her. What's wrong with you, sir? And I have to go now. Like, I don't have time for everyone, obviously. Come on, I've given you enough of my time. Pooh!
Starting point is 02:29:31 In a cloud of clouds. Yeah, omnipotent clouds. Omnipotence and halos. He's gone. And JR is very confused. He tried to throw his phone across the street. He was so confused and it didn't work. So police, he has to turn himself in. He tried to throw his phone across the street. He was so confused and it didn't work. So police, he has to turn himself in.
Starting point is 02:29:47 He's to police. He's released with a summons to appear. The resolution is he is going to accept a deal to settle. He's going to plead guilty to criminal mischief, which is a Class A misdemeanor. Carries a maximum penalty of one year in jail as well. But they work something out. And they work out a deal here where he has to. This is a big one.
Starting point is 02:30:09 You, sir. They fuck off $600 in restitution for the phone. So buy him a new phone. That's it. He had a two-year-old iPhone. 600 bucks we'll give you. So September 2018, NBA threatened to fine him if he appeared in a game without covering up the Supreme logo he tattooed on his fucking leg. Oh, he did that?
Starting point is 02:30:30 On his calf. I guess he was a model for them at one point because that was one of the sponsors. So he tattooed the logo and they said, you have to do it. He resisted, but then the Players Association said, that's one of the things. What are you going to do then? You're not a NASCAR. You're fucking with dollars now. So this is about sponsorships.
Starting point is 02:30:48 Sorry, dude. You got to cover it. So he covered it up. There you go. 2018-19, he's on the Cavs still. This year, LeBron goes away. Yeah. And they're 19-63.
Starting point is 02:31:00 Ouch. Jesus Christ. Really? You can talk all the shit people want about getting swept in the finals. Without him, they're 19-63. That's ugly. From going to the finals to, holy shit, even if you reverse this record, that'd be a great record.
Starting point is 02:31:17 This is terrible, 19-63. Fucking not good. And this year he only plays in 11 games. Starts for, yeah's but he does make for 11 games he makes 14 million 720 thousand dollars oh more than a million dollars a game that's unbelievable that's un-fucking-believable and then after the t the the season july 15 2019 he's waived by the cavaliers yeah. Yeah, because you can't do that. They're like, holy shit.
Starting point is 02:31:47 I mean, it's not like you have to, he's not hurting or anything. I mean, you know, he's made a lot of money. He's very famous now. I mean, I don't feel bad for him, Jimmy. No. But who I do feel bad for, oh my God, Earl Smith. Earl Smith, director of North American vehicle testing at Link Engineering Company. Well, tell him how to use them.
Starting point is 02:32:10 That's why I had to pick him. I'm like, my God, is that what he's doing? Is he testing cars? If you jam it, I'd fucking jam through a stop sign and plow in with Jaguar. How will it react? Is he working? Is that what it is? Earl.
Starting point is 02:32:23 Here's Earl Smith again. Computer science student at Bronx Community College in New York. Earl Smith, senior managing director, head of strategic investments group at Capital One in Bethesda. Earl Smith, director of engineering at Marriott International. And Earl Smith, director of construction at Poudrey School District in Fort Collins, Colorado. Don't know. 2019-20, he goes to the Lakers. The Lakers signed him because where did LeBron go?
Starting point is 02:32:52 Yeah, he did. Said, you want to sign my little buddy? And they said, sure, we'll sign your little buddy. Especially because they hardly have to pay him shit because Cleveland's still paying him. So he doesn't mind taking the veteran minimum exception deal that they can offer because he's still paying him. So he doesn't mind taking the veteran minimum exception deal that they can offer because he's getting paid already. So this year, the Lakers, 2019-20, they're 52-19.
Starting point is 02:33:14 They beat the Blazers in the first round, Rockets in the second round, Nuggets in the third round. Those are all five-game series. So they go all the way to play Miami in the finals and beat them in six as well so he gets his second nba championship have to be shitting me absolutely this is uh let's see here they uh that year he plays in six games six games starts zero 2.8 points a game has a ring though that's awesome i want that this is great this is even better this is like
Starting point is 02:33:45 robin who doesn't even have to go out with batman batman's like there's crime and robin's like i'm watching something right now and batman's like i'll be back later i'll bring home taco bell cool bro robin's like be careful here's the door slam and the fat batmobile fire up the fat Batmobile fire up. He's got microwavable popcorn going. He comes home with bags of Taco Bell Robins, like falling asleep on the couch with drool coming out of his mouth. So he makes $1,456,667 from the Cavs. That's from the Cavs.
Starting point is 02:34:24 And then another $289,803 from the calves that's from the calves and then another two hundred eighty nine thousand eight hundred three dollars from the lakers as well june 2020 this is a video you can watch it anytime you like uh it is hilarious somebody this was during the george floyd protests somebody broke a window in his car the protests weren't even near where he was but somebody had spilled over and broke a window in his car uh the person who did it is a little tiny blonde person yeah and they're like a short person with blonde puffy hair and he beats the living shit out of this person on video and he is just what this person's on the ground covered up and he's just measuring and kicking this person in the head. Pow, pow.
Starting point is 02:35:08 Then they get up and he like pops him again. And this person is tough, man. They ran off like their life depended on it, which it might have at that moment because he looked like he was going to kill him. So he beat him like he was jumping him into the blood. Holy fucking shit. Well, would you like to hear him describe what happened yeah i would jr said one of these little motherfucking white boys didn't know where he was going and broke my fucking window in my truck this is a residential area there wasn't no stores over
Starting point is 02:35:36 here none of that shit broke my window i chased him down and whooped his ass so if the if the footage come out and you all see it i chased him down and whooped his ass. So if the footage come out and you all see it, I chased him down and whooped his ass. He broke my window. This ain't no hate crime. I ain't got no problem with nobody who ain't got no problem with me. There's a problem with the motherfucking system. That's it.
Starting point is 02:35:54 This motherfucker broke my window and I whooped his ass. He said, don't care what he was, broke my fucking window, has nothing to do with anything. Leave me the fuck alone. Didn't say anything about why I'm out of New York. He he was. Broke my fucking window. Has nothing to do with anything. Leave me the fuck alone. Didn't say anything about why I'm out of New York. He said nothing.
Starting point is 02:36:08 Broke my window. That's it. Fuck that. Then later on, he says, you know, maybe I was a little hasty. Maybe a little out of line. He says, granted, if he would have seen me and seen somebody outside the car or outside the house or whatever i think he would have broke it absolutely not right so he says it was just a random act of stupidness and i give him that but that ass whooping was a random act of stupidness on my behalf and i give him that yeah i give him that too he said when it happened i seen red then when i finally snapped i'm still
Starting point is 02:36:42 disappointed in myself for me I'm 34 years old. I have four little girls at home. I don't want that image, regardless of the fact of whether it was right or wrong. I don't want them to have that image of their dad being capable of doing that and doing something like that. He then says, quote, I was trying to go Bones Jones or Anderson Silva on him, I guess. Law enforcement says no charge is likely because they don't know who the fuck the victim was. They haven't come forward
Starting point is 02:37:09 because they broke the guy's goddamn window. Duke ran off, yeah. Yeah, he ran off. He wants to go, I'm the guy who vandalized a window. So it's just an even trade at that point. You broke my shit. I busted your ass. Everybody's happy.
Starting point is 02:37:23 Everybody goes their separate ways. point you broke my shit i busted your ass everybody's happy everybody goes their separate ways um so uh july 1st 2020 he signed a substitution contract with the lakers i don't know what the fuck that means but um either way he was in the bubble there and he got in trouble for the bubble stuff the covet bubble well um he had to take a video down because, and they made him shut down his Instagram. He said, oh man, they mad at me,
Starting point is 02:37:49 bro. I'm gone. Just got the text exposing too much shit. Gotta go. My bad. My bad. Um, he complained about everything.
Starting point is 02:37:58 He said the food was shitty. He didn't have a blanket that he wanted. There was a blanket missing. Um, he said about the food quote, we're professional athletes and all that. But then you be over here crying, talking. You be over there crying, talking about somebody can't stay healthy and their body's breaking down and all this other shit. You want a motherfucking Ferrari to run like a Ferrari because you paid for it as a Ferrari.
Starting point is 02:38:20 But you keep gassing it up with Chrysler shit. With Chrysler shit. With Chrysler shit. Not with 87. You're putting 87 and it's saying 93, motherfucker. What the hell? This is not high octane. We need high octane. They're feeding us soup.
Starting point is 02:38:39 You're gassing up your motherfucking Ferrari with some Chrysler shit, bitch. So I threw my soup at a coach so for that season he makes uh 1,456,667 dollars from the calves as well for the 21 uh 21 22 season by the way he's retired yeah he's done he makes another 1,456,666 dollars from the Cavs bringing his career earnings to 91,486,193 dollars never averaged more than 15 points a game that's unbelievable that's something or did he go 18 that one year thank you uncle lebron that is amazing yeah um so what are you going to do when you're when you're retired you have 91 million dollars what would you do
Starting point is 02:39:30 here jimmy uh what do you expect him to do what everyone would do you start playing college golf that's what you start doing you enroll in north carolina a and t and join their golf team. And that's exactly what he did. You can afford a membership to any place on earth. No, he wants to go to school. He never went to college. So he says he wants to go to college. He's enrolled in school. And the NCAA said that he has all his eligibility.
Starting point is 02:39:57 He's like Scott Bakula in Necessary Roughness. It's just sitting there, even though he's 36. So he did it he said golf is one of those games that has you feeling really high or can bring you down to your knees and humble you and to have that feeling and knowing all of the games pretty much in my own hands and i don't have to worry about teammates to pass the ball and receiving passes and playing defense i can just play my game and just have fun yeah that's it is he trying to troll for college checks is that i don't know what he's doing would be the interest of that but
Starting point is 02:40:32 he gets he got a 4.0 average in his first semester in college he did great he said i he said i can't even describe the feeling this is a tweet especially when you don't think you can do it. You always hear about your disabilities. So he's sitting there. Earl Smith III. He wins academic athlete of the year at North Carolina A&T University. And LeBron retweets him and says, yes, sir, at the real J.R. Smith. Proud of you, kid. Love, bro.
Starting point is 02:41:02 And it's just a picture of him next to his thing. It's so fucking funny hilarious then he says doctor this is this is uh jr dr earl joseph smith the third has a dope ring to it a hell of a long way to go but not impossible one day at a time hashtag go for yours his goal is to be a doctor apparently well october 2021 there's the hornets again okay the hornets not the new orleans hornets slash pelicans actual hornets he's attacked by a swarm of hornets i'm not shitting you where the hell did he find this on the golf course he's in burlington north carolina and apparently he's out on the i don't know where
Starting point is 02:41:47 the fuck he was but he's on the 12th hole on the elon phoenix invitational at the alamance country club when he stepped on what looked to be a nest and got swarmed by fucking they don't know if they're wasps or hornets but i'm going with hornets because that would be hilarious that's great yeah we're going with hornets and And yeah, he did that. He continued his round after that, after being stung by Hornets and finished 81st out of 84 people. That's not great. The Hornets really brought him down. That's what I'm saying.
Starting point is 02:42:16 Can't get enough of J.R. Smith. I honestly can't. I want more, but I don't want bad things. I don't want this to be like the last few weeks. I don't want it to be like this. I just don't. Please. He's going to throw soup in somebody's face oh god it's gonna be terrible uh can't get enough watch him golf that's all watch him golf watch some old highlights do whatever you got to do there's tons of jerseys of his two out there for the several teams he
Starting point is 02:42:38 played for pretty cool you can get all those autographs. Go to YouTube and watch him beat the shit out of somebody unknown. Yeah, it's just J.R. Smith beat down. You look it up on just Google, it'll come up right away, the TMZ video. It is wild stuff. So do all of that. Check that out. And most of all, if you enjoyed the show, tell everyone about it. Tell the world.
Starting point is 02:43:05 Tell anybody you know and the rest of the people you don't know by giving a review. Leave five stars wherever the hell app you're listening on. It helps a lot. Trust me. It helps drive us up the charts. And I don't know what the fuck else it does. I don't control that shit. But just do it.
Starting point is 02:43:14 Thank you. We appreciate it. Also, follow us on social media at Crime and Sports on Twitter and Facebook at small town murder on instagram and head over to shut up and give me murder.com where you can get everything all your merchandise everything like that you can also uh get your tickets to live shows uh no more crime and sports live shows this year but we do have small town murder live shows and if you want to go to a comedy show fucking go to that because we we we tear the asshole out of the live show crowd. Sure, yeah. Not literally.
Starting point is 02:43:46 We don't pipe them. It's not a piping. But you're going to feel good afterwards in a good way. It's not a Big Al's Big Earl's. No, no, no. It's not Big Earl's Proctology. That's not what it is. Proctological Center.
Starting point is 02:44:00 That's not it at all. So, yeah, check all that out. Come see us. It's been sold out now i guess for a couple days the uh papst show in milwaukee it's a huge theater but people can return their tickets so the week of people who forgot they have tickets will then get like an email going hey you're going to a show and they're like oh fuck i forgot to return those that i bought almost three years ago and i don't even live in w anymore. So I live in North Carolina now
Starting point is 02:44:25 getting attacked by hornets. So yeah, do that. Keep checking for tickets for that day, September 10th. Then September 23rd, we're in Tampa, Florida. Two shows at the Tampa Improv that night. Next night, the 24th of September in Orlando at the Orlando Improv for two shows. Get your tickets to those.
Starting point is 02:44:42 Also, a few tickets have opened up to the Austin, Texas show in November. Right. So get your tickets there as well. And come see us. We can't wait to see it. A live show. Patreon dot com slash crime and sports. You get all the bonus stuff and we do bonus episodes again. We don't fuck around on Patreon. We give you a good shit. Anybody five dollars a month or above the price of one cup of coffee or above not only are you going to get new episodes every other week you're going to get two new episodes you're also going to get the whole back catalog of over 100 episodes
Starting point is 02:45:15 to binge on everything like that and they even have yearly subscriptions where it's a little cheaper and you can gift somebody a subscription as well if you have friends yeah over the holidays you want to hit them up with. That's a good way to do it. So do that. This week what we're going to give you is we're going to do number one for crime and sports, sex scandals part two. Wrap it up. Wrap it up.
Starting point is 02:45:36 The Duke fuck list was too much. It was too much to swallow, as this young lady told us. It was just too much. Some of these young men were. So we're going to talk about that. We're going to talk the uh soccer player who banged his sister-in-law for years and wrote poems to his girlfriend that got read out in court and they're really embarrassing and hilarious and uh tony parker banging brent barry's wife and there's a couple other ones in there we'll talk about all that shit and then for town murder, we're going to talk about the Zodiac Killer, specifically the last few years.
Starting point is 02:46:07 Suspects starting with this documentary on Netflix where this guy thinks his father is the Zodiac Killer. He wrote a book about it and all these connections. It can be no one else until you actually go into things and go. None of that stuff connects until it's somebody else. It's some definitely someone else. So we'll talk about how that's not the guy. And then we'll also talk about kind of what the theories are on who is, because they think they have better ideas.
Starting point is 02:46:31 Now we'll get into all that with the Zodiac killer. That's patrion.com slash crime and sports is where you get all of that. And you're going to get a shout out. As a matter of fact, Jimmy, I need you to hit me with the names of the most wonderful goddamn people in the world who would never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever ask us if they were looking to get some pipe. Jimmy, hit me with those names right now. This week's executive producers are Kelsey Baird.
Starting point is 02:46:57 Happy birthday, P.S. Zach Leonard. Yeti Shetty in Canada. Gabriel Abel Marquez. Travis McGuigan, I think, Crystal Gotthard. It's got to be Gothard, right? Not Gotthard.
Starting point is 02:47:09 Or maybe Goddard. Goddard. That's possible. Or maybe it is Crystal Gotthard. How about that? Crystal Gotthard. Cool. Other producers this week are Maria Kip Soosley, whose divorce is final.
Starting point is 02:47:21 Congratulations. Hey, congratulations. Booger Johnson, Sheda Perlman, Liz Vasquez, Peyton Me Hey, congratulations. Booger Johnson, Sheda Perlman, Liz Vasquez, Peyton Meadows, Richard Leroy Johnson. He wanted us to put in
Starting point is 02:47:31 the Leroy part because Richard Johnson is filthy. Alex Hooper, Tanya Willis, Joe Settle in Portugal, Jason Gillis, happy hour checking in
Starting point is 02:47:40 from Point Blank, Texas. That has got to be changed. That should not be a town name just like gun there's nothing arizona point blank is terrible i hate that is bad uh erica tevecchio uh rachel gare i think gear maybe janice hill corporal carl kirschner wants a mind your own business sign he went camping and everybody has like little inviting signs for their camp spots and he wants one to tell people go the fuck away uh jesse do we have them check check check carl uh jesse the
Starting point is 02:48:11 body ventura britney caputo and her and her scarlet horby oh good good that's good nancy weaver jeremiah bueller suzanna platt jenny linen madison lop now i think amanda hop uh april chanel channel maybe uh kevin bottom fritz jesus brock barrett phil novak britney young calvin ode tracy buknek oh boy not happening andy schwartz leah pitt uh amanda carrington jennings jennings sanders hubert cumberdale josh with no last name felicia richardson glennyle, J.H., Griffin Gastel, Tiara Walker, Tiara maybe, Leah Kassar, Don the Donkey Hammer Teeter. Very nice. Is that a wrestler? I don't know. No, he talks about Donkey Cocks.
Starting point is 02:48:55 Oh, there he is, the Donkey Hammer. Small town murder, yeah. Yikes. Julie Crough, Crow maybe, Joseph Scott, Adelina. Adelina, I think that's right. Elizabeth Glenser. Andrew Schultz. Probably not.
Starting point is 02:49:08 Cheryl Carmer. Amanda Hood. Joey. Nope, that's Joe Barty. Jill Gretzky. Jesse Rowland. Eric O'Malley. Karen Wake.
Starting point is 02:49:17 Wakey, maybe. Sarah Ehlers. Ehlers, probably. Amelia. Nope, that's Emily. Emily Boyle. Jameel Parker. Adrian. This is how I read P.S. I go, maybe that's the word. Nope, that's Emily. Emily Boyle. Jameel Parker. Adrian.
Starting point is 02:49:25 This is how I read, P.S. I go, maybe that's the word. Adrian with no last name. You're working through it. Real time. So I read books, too. Antonio Verde. Verde.
Starting point is 02:49:35 He does not read books, by the way. That's a huge fucking lie. This is why I don't read books. That's more accurate. Because this is how I read books. Jared Edwards. Jason Barron, Tony Bowler, James Darley, Kyle White, Hannah Ford, Tom Fearon, I think, Madison Tamichi, Chelsea Huntley, Joseph Potter, Kyle Wilson, Autumn Stacey, Tony Lynn, Maria T, Elizabeth Dillon, JPB Gerald, Sandra Garza, Shelby Potter, Lisa Cook Parsons, Persons, Vanessa Andrade, Georgia, Georgia, Pagent, Pagent, oh boy, Mayatua Tiamosha. That's not right.
Starting point is 02:50:18 I'm so sorry. You really, you had no confidence in that. None. Not a bit of it. Lauren Fori. Monty Pastrami nips. Evidently, now everybody's got some sort of cold gut nips. Very nice.
Starting point is 02:50:31 That's good to know. Call me back when someone has Soprassetta nips and we'll talk about it. I really like a Soprassetta. Connie Pocanese. Jesus. Christina with no last name. Tom with no last name. Molly Horan.
Starting point is 02:50:42 Oh, boy. Bear Honeywell. Carolyn Mockenhopped. What? Chelsea H. Alexis Mottichuk. Is she making motors or something? Kathleen Molka. These last names are brutal. Supporter of human rights.
Starting point is 02:50:58 It's got a 12-valve Mockenhopped over here. We had it put in last week. It's going to blow these motherfuckers off the line, man. Ethan Blankens quincy jama what john katchian that's not a word katie with no last name not a word jennifer with no last name marcus patton victoria beerschmidt uh elizabeth dufer tracy hausen hausen uh christina perez d hernandez c ellis health uh nope heather heather barker quabian barbary cory hopkins alexis mott jesse davis deanna hughes jerusha warren green warner green uh jessica gray crystal p helen hig Allison Allenson, Coons with no last name.
Starting point is 02:51:54 Wait, that's a last name. Amanda Morris, Daniela Anarella, Riley Renser-Busselman. This is going great. Mackenzie with no last name. Heather Perel. Graham Oatkin. Sam Phillips. Josh Smith.
Starting point is 02:52:08 Rebecca Morris. Etienne Peralt. Valerie Brophy. Jim and Lisa Weiger. Kylie Morgan. Megan McRantz. Jesus Christ. Neil Hazleton.
Starting point is 02:52:21 Anthony Nash. Nate Spolman. Rebecca Medina. Matt Still. Michelle. Michelle Zaben. Janie. Zaben, Janie Snodgrass, Katherine Thompson, Michael Johnson, Chase Skibidzitski, Jennifer Vogel, Danielle Kugler, Steph Jennings, Naomi Effinger, Ryan Riley, Megan Byers, Terrence Jones, Sabrina Scarborough, Marshall Long, Michael Gaffney, Fedora0521, nope, 010. What? I don't know numbers either.
Starting point is 02:52:57 I don't do numbers. Autumn Tarea, Michael Huff, Jacob Graves, Jerome with no last name, Cargo Brooks, Tim Shepard, Sophia Monroy, Duke Rendon, Nicole Tullis, Rick Williams, Reagan Thorpe, Marceline Guyette, Lizeth Romo, Bailey Schwan, I think, Daily, Daniel, not Daily, Daniel Harris, Kerry Brockman, Andrew Sebalta, RFE20, Corey with no last name, Josh Fortis from Mesa, Michael McCarthy, Ashley Meyer, Lucas McBean, Isabel Greenwood, Kristen
Starting point is 02:53:33 Griffin, Tracy Eaton, Adiana with no last name, Catherine Siv, Aaron Krause, Kiefer Cowley, Cameron Wamsley, Thomas Wiffle of the Wiffle Bats, I imagine. Oh, of the Wiffle. That's a fortune.
Starting point is 02:53:51 Wiffle fortune, man. I've given them so much money on my own. Grayson Wright, Nicholas Smith, Michaela McCone, Luca Excel, Joanna Phillips, Robert Bailey, Will Phillips, Pamela Roberts, Heather H., Bryn Lukert, Brett Brewer, Matthew Harrington, Ashley Nelson, happy birthday, April with no last name, Kyle Haw, and Simon Miller, and all of our patrons. You guys are incredible. Thank you so much, everybody. God damn it, you people are awesome. Thank you so much. By the way, I just pictured with the soup again.
Starting point is 02:54:26 I pictured JR eating the soup while wearing like a cardigan that's a size too big for him. You know, like a nice comfy sweater. Nice baggy one, yeah. And he has like a book out and then somehow a man makes a man and he's like, fuck you, and throws soup at him. It's just, I don't see how that goes from one. Soup is such a calm meal to eat. Yeah. It's not a throwing food no what
Starting point is 02:54:45 i mean you throw a churro at somebody you don't throw soup you throw a burrito you throw a fuck there take that so why only mexican food you only throw mexican food hand food like a sandwich is okay either way thank you so much if you want to follow us on social media, the two of us here, very easy. Head over to shut up and give me murder.com. There is links to everything, including our social media or just Google search crime and sports podcast hosts. We're the only fucking ones that said, thank you so much for joining us.
Starting point is 02:55:17 We can't wait live from the crime and sports studios. We will see you next week. It's going to make some soup. Bye. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Crime and Sports early and ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen early and add free with Wondery Plus and Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.

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