Crime in Sports - #60 - The Sudden Violence Of Bad Decisions - The Madness of Vernon Maxwell
Episode Date: March 21, 2017This week, we see what happens when a man lives by two rules: Never think before you act, and never, ever take any responsibility for your actions. Living by these simple rules helped him to ...break nearly every law he could probably think of, including drugs, assault, kidnapping, gunplay, never paying child support, and a slew of other infractions, both scary, and hilarious. A champion o the court, a menace off of it. It's a police pushing, disease spreading, fan punching good time, with one of the wildest criminals we've seen, so far.Drink yourself silly, have more kids than you can meet, and punch anyone within the sound of your voice with "Mad Max" Vernon Maxwell!! Check us out, every Tuesday. We will continue to bring you the biggest idiots in sports history!Hosted by James Pietragallo & Jimmie Whisman New episodes every Tuesday!!Please subscribe, rate, and review!Listen on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, or wherever you listen to podcasts!Head to shutupandgivememurder.com for all things Crime in Sports!For merchandise: crimeinsports.threadless.comCheck out James and Jimmie's other show: Small Town Murder Follow us on social media!Facebook: facebook.com/crimeinsportsInstagram: instagram.com/smalltownmurderTwitter: twitter.com/MurderSmall Contact the show: crimeinsports@gmail.comDonate on Patreon: patreon.com/crimeinsportsPayPal: paypal.me/crimeinsports See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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My name is James Petrigallo.
I'm here with my co-host.
I am Jimmy Wisman.
Thank you folks so much for joining us this week.
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We have a doozy for you tonight.
Hope you enjoyed last week with Tommy Kane.
If OJ had a little brother, that was the best way I
could describe him.
It's perfect.
It's the best description ever because he's just as psychotic.
He's a low-budget OJ.
Yeah.
That's all he is.
Low-rent.
Low-rent OJ.
That's exactly what he is.
OJ without the Brentwood estate and the Rolls-Royce.
Right.
That's what we had there.
Shall we?
Much further fall from grace.
We have an update, folks.
Yes.
Let's talk about that.
Let's talk about it.
A lot of you have sent this to us.
It's been insane.
Believe me, we got it.
We knew about this two weeks ago.
Yeah.
And we were waiting to talk about it until he signed with a team.
Yes.
And he has done that.
He has.
Bruno.
He has signed.
From episode five.
Do they make milk bones in Brazil?
Episode five.
Bruno Fernandez de Souza, who killed his girlfriend, had her cut up and fed to dogs.
Right.
That is a fact.
You can go back and listen to that shit.
Skin and bones and muscle and organs fed to dogs.
The bones buried in concrete.
Yes.
This was about 10 years ago.
And he is out of jail.
Already out.
Not only is he out of jail, but he is signed with a team.
Yes.
That's wow. I don't even know what to say about that what the fuck was the team damn it i can't remember it
doesn't matter some asshole took a chance on this fucking jerk yeah that guy that's fine thank god
there's outrage wow in the city that the team is in they are furious about it whoever owns that
team i hope they don't have any daughters because I would say if I was somebody's daughter, I'd go, are you kidding me?
I'm going to fucking hire this guy now. The only way
they can hire him should be to
introduce their daughters to him.
No, it's ridiculous. If you're not willing to do that,
then don't fucking hire him either. Unbelievable.
Yeah, you have to go back and listen to DeSouza, because
that was a really twisted episode,
and it was a lot of
Google Translate, so I'd like more people to hear
me decipher Portuguese for the most part, but I'm telling you right now, it was a lot of Google Translate. So I'd like more people to hear me decipher Portuguese for the most part.
But I'm telling you right now, it was a wild tale.
He kidnapped, God, the worst.
Not only did he kidnap her and then have her killed and fed to dogs.
Before that, before any of this happened,
this was because she had a baby that she was trying to get child support from
that he impregnated her.
He's not going to deal with porn stars.
That's not going to be his forte.
No.
At one point while she was pregnant, he held her at gunpoint and forced her to take a black
mark.
That's right.
I forgot about that.
So some concoction that his friend made and it didn't take apparently.
And then he had the kid.
It's a disaster.
You really have to listen to it.
She was a porn star and he didn't want to be sending her child support.
So he had her killed.
And I went back.
And because she's a porn star, I was like, I wonder if there are videos of her still on the Internet today.
Yes.
It is the most disturbing thing ever.
It's terrifying to see a now deceased person having sex.
But it appears to be against her will.
I'm sure it was.
It's so bad.
It's Brazil.
We never know.
And she's grunting that it's not even.
That's terrible.
The Brazilians don't know how to make porn.
It is the most terrible thing.
You don't want to see that, and you don't want to see 10-year-old porn anyway.
Right.
Nothing looks more dated than old porn.
It could be three years later, you're like, that doesn't look right.
And they're so hairy.
It's so crazy.
Well, South America would have're going to pass on that.
The Brazilian is pussy waxing.
That's it.
It should look amazing.
It's not.
It's not.
And the guy is so terribly scary looking.
He's so hairy.
It's so gross.
You tend to look away from the dude as a dude looking at porn.
That happens.
But I was not watching it to beat.
I was watching it to see what it looked like.
And it's horrendous.
Like a sociological experiment.
Like, hmm, what am I watching here?
You're jealous of your research, so I took a peek.
Jesus Christ.
And boy, do I regret it.
I'll let you do it now, because that is fucking horrific.
I'll find the horrific Brazilian points from now on.
So gross.
Let's get on to tonight's insane person.
I love it.
Boy, do we have a pile of crazy tonight.
Wow.
Reaching up to the clouds. And I loved him. I loved him, too. I love it. Boy, do we have a pile of crazy tonight. Wow. Reaching up to the clouds.
And I loved him. I loved him too.
I loved him as a player and I
didn't realize he was so crazy because
if you look on his Wikipedia page,
there isn't a fucking mention of any of this. There's no crazy.
No crazy on that. I feel like something's
happened there. This is terrible because this is
the second time now that somebody
that I enjoyed watching when I was a kid
has been destroyed. First with J.R. Ryder.
Yeah.
And now this.
When you had no idea, right?
No idea.
I mean, I heard that there was some scuffs, but I didn't know it was that fucking bad.
He's kind of a jerk off maybe, but not to this extent here.
Now, Vernon Maxwell, the crazy began on September 12th, 1965.
Vernon Maxwell.
Mad Max.
The NBA player.
He's born in Gainesville, Florida.
He's down there and he is a Gainesville guy through and through.
Really?
You know our rule, never go home?
Yeah.
He consistently breaks that rule, boy.
He goes home a lot.
Can't get him enough Gainesville.
And he needs to stop.
He needs to get away from Gainesville.
His mother, Grace, is his mother.
He was raised with his mother.
His father left when he was only three years old.
There, Grace was left to raise the kids.
She was in cosmetology school when his dad left.
And he's got a brother and a sister also.
Had like a middle class upbringing.
And then they had to move to the projects.
And later on, he got back into the middle class area, which is good.
His mom worked her ass off.
His mom's a very tough woman, as we find out later.
His future wife that we'll find,
I'll talk about later, who has one of the best names ever. His future wife said, quote,
I've known Vernon since the fourth grade. He's not going to back down. He's not going
to compromise. He was raised that way. His mother is like that. They're strong people.
Yeah. So that's that's what we're looking at here. She had she had a life. The man leaves.
Her life goes to shit. And she works her ass off and props that house back up and
gets back on the horse. She gets that shit together.
That's a tough woman. I like her. She's really cool.
The wife, future wife,
her name... We'll get
to it. Never mind. I don't even want to give it away yet
because it's so funny.
Legend has it that he would dribble his
basketball around the projects at night
to get better ball handling skills.
All around the block. I don't know if that's true or if that's one of those like invented press things like
this poor kid from the project dribbled his basketball around in circles.
You know what I mean?
One of those shithead fucking silver haired middle aged white man stories, you know.
High school, he went to Buchholz High down there in Gainesville.
He didn't make the varsity basketball team until his junior year.
Oh.
Which it was tough. I guess there was competition down there too. He also played make the varsity basketball team until his junior year, which it was tough.
I guess there was competition down there, too.
He also played football, very good athlete in both sports.
He began dating a woman named Myra Jenkins in high school.
This is not his future wife with a great name.
That's not very fucking funny, James.
That's not very funny.
Believe me, it gets better.
Your joke didn't pay off, fucker.
It's bad.
So they watched NBA games together on the couch, and they would dream, and he'd go,
oh, look, I'm going to do that someday.
You know, what kids do, shit.
He was voted, or I don't know how this honor is bestowed upon an individual, but he was
named Florida's Mr. Basketball in his senior year, which means you're the best player in
the state.
Every state has a Mr. Basketball.
I don't know why you would call it that.
It's stupid.
But his high school coach, Rick Swain, he coached him in both football and basketball.
This guy's silver, boy.
Let me tell you something.
We have a silver-haired, middle-aged white man here.
Right out of the gate.
Right out of the gate.
Throughout everything, he's got nothing but just, well, you know, I don't know.
I think maybe it wasn't his fault.
It's always that.
He says about him in school, quote,
We recognized midway through his sophomore year that he was going to be special.
Obviously, his athleticism and his will to win is what carried us.
He hated losing more than anything.
He had a temper, but most of the good players do.
He learned to control it.
He had to lead them, and he didn't always demonstrate the greatest of leadership,
but when you needed him most, he was there.
You bet he was.
So no matter what he says bad about him, he's always got something good to say about him right around the corner.
Now, through high school, he becomes, like I said, Mr. Basketball in high school.
So he is recruited heavily, which you would imagine.
He is recruited with the most vigor by North Carolina State.
Now, North Carolina State at this time, we're talking 1984.
This is the Jim Valvano days.
Jim Valvano, as you might know, he gave that crazy speech when he was dying of cancer.
It's a very famous inspirational speech that they play every year.
They have a Jim Valvano. Win it for the giver?
No, no, no.
That's way before.
He had the whole, it's a whole thing.
I don't fucking know.
Him with cancer and never give up and all this thing.
It's an inspirational thing.
They have the Jim Valvano Award.
I don't think I ever heard the speech.
That they give out for bravery and blah, blah, blah in the face of adversity, all that kind of shit.
Basically, he's a very famous coach.
And NC State made an insane run in the tournament in 83, too.
So it's one of those deals.
At this time, NC State is a place where you'd want to go if you were a Mr. Basketball type of thing.
Now, Jim Valvano, the coach, like we said, the late Jim Valvano, because he had cancer and died.
That's how he became so inspirational.
That'll do it.
Yeah, it'll do it.
He stayed at Rick Swain, the coach's house, during recruiting.
So they were like, so Swain was also encouraging him to go there.
He knew Valvano.
And he's like, no, no, you want to go there.
So everybody's encouraging him to go to NC State.
That seems like the place he should be, except for two days before signing day.
He had already committed verbally, and I think they signed something, but it doesn't matter because it doesn't count until official signing day for college.
On two days before official signing day, University of Florida players take Vernon Maxwell out
for two crazy nights on the town.
That'll do it.
And he reneges on his NC State commitment and signs with the University of Florida.
Oh, boy. So that's it. Vernon has priorities and they are
fucking partying. Let me tell you something. It is
all about that shit for his whole career.
His freshman year,
1984-85, he played in 30 games
which they got him in all the games.
13.3 points a game,
2.4 rebounds, 1.3 assists, and
one steal. That's a great freshman year.
He hits the ground running. He's a local one steal. That's a great freshman year. I mean, he hits the ground running.
And he's a local guy.
I mean, he's probably feeling great about himself.
He came from shit.
And he's like, now I'm the top thing around here.
I'm on the basketball team.
His head was so smooth and round.
Very smooth.
It looked like a milk dud.
It was beautiful.
He could absolutely look like he shaved his head four or five times a day and then buttered
it nicely for shine. It was so glossy. Never saw one hair on that ever. He could absolutely look like he shaved his head four or five times a day and then buttered it. Yeah.
Nicely for shine.
It was so glossy.
Never saw one hair on that ever.
It was perfect.
Amazing.
Has an even better year, his sophomore year, 85, 86, 33 games played, 19.6 points per game.
So now he's in college.
That's a lot.
Yeah.
If you look in college, the scores are, you know, 61, 55.
They're not 100 to 95.
So the points are skewed.
They only play 40 minutes instead of 48, too.
So that also means that.
And generally, they have more conservative offenses in college because they don't have these amazing NBA athletes.
They have, like, two good athletes and a bunch of guys that you want to pass to the good athletes, basically. You run a pick, moves, and plays, and actually drawing up plays and executing.
That's the game.
Yeah, absolutely.
So, yeah, 19.6 points, 4.5 rebounds, 2.5 assists.
A third of the goddamn points.
The ups at all, basically.
When they're getting 60 points a game, he's getting 20 of them.
That's a third of it.
That's a lot.
Things are going well.
He's a college kid.
He's 20 years old.
He's doing great.
He's getting better every year.
Things are going so well.
So what do you have to do?
You've got to have a kid.
What else would you do?
He did that shit in college. Let's get a kid out. Get out of to do you gotta have a kid what else would you do in college let's
get a kid out get out of here let's get a kid out and with his with his future wife and girlfriend
from high school or girlfriend after high school in college and for the future rasher rita rasher
rasher rita that's her first name her first name is rasher rita holy shit it sounds like a delicious
fuck it no it sounds disgusting it's terrible it sounds like a delicious fuck. No, it sounds disgusting. The word rash is in it. It's terrible.
Rasharita. It sounds like a terrible...
Sounds like something on a Taco Bell menu.
Who names their kid Rasharita?
Who names that?
All day I've been singing a Harry Belafonte
Angelina song with Rasharita and all
day long I've been doing that shit. I was singing some
delicious Mexican food and then I was like,
no, no, no, no, that sounds disgusting.
That sounds like something you'd get after coming in contact with a plant and you're allergic to.
I got a little Rasherita on my elbow. It's not great. They did the enchilada and the burrito.
The enchilada would talk about that. It's very similar to that. This is a burrito
that will give you a rash. Absolutely. Now she goes by
shell because good God. Because that makes sense. It doesn't matter. It's better than Rasherita.
But I am not calling her shell. I will call her Rasherita
for the entire time
because that's my favorite name ever.
Rasherita.
I'm upset I didn't name
my daughter Rasherita right now.
I got to tell you.
How do you pick that name?
Where does that come from?
I have no idea.
That can't be.
Is that a family name?
Rasherita?
That is horrible.
Who came up with?
That's what I mean.
And the other one parent
suggesting it to the other,
one of them should have been like,
what the fuck are you talking about?
I thought you were saying her first name was Rasher, which sounds tough.
Rasher Rita?
Right.
Yeah, that sounds like a roller derby chick.
That's Rasher Rita right there.
She puts a forearm right in your throat.
No, but this is not.
That's a tough chick right there.
That's not.
But Rasher Rita, that's bullshit.
That's what that is.
That's horrible.
And Rasher Rita is going to be long-suffering.
Really?
Long-suffering, this poor woman.
Good Lord.
And we'll blame her parents.
A lot of it's her own goddamn fault, too, because all the warning signs are there, lady.
Get the fuck out of the way from this guy.
I'm telling you, man.
Anyway, 86-87 on the court.
Had a kid off the court on the court.
Couldn't be going any better.
Wow.
Nothing changes. Terrific year. 21.7 points the court. Had a kid off the court on the court. Couldn't be going any better. Wow. Nothing changes.
Terrific year.
21.7 points a game.
Rasharita staying up all night with the kid.
He's not.
He's not.
He's out playing ball.
He's getting all asleep.
He's partying.
We'll find out later that he parties and she goes, well, you got to let Vernon be Vernon.
Holy shit.
She's a silver-haired, middle-aged white lady.
What a lady.
21.7 points a game.
3.7 rebounds.
3.6 assists.
Two whole steals a game. He's doing it. He is killing it. I mean, he's an NBA scout. He's a shooting, 3.7 rebounds, 3.6 assists, two whole steals a game.
He's doing it.
He is killing it.
I mean, he's an NBA scout.
He's a shooting guard, right?
Yep, scout.
And he would, in college and in high school, he would switch from point guard to shooting guard, too,
depending on what the matchups were and that sort of thing.
So, yeah, he's versatile in the backcourt.
All right.
Definitely.
Now, 1987, a paternity suit is filed against him.
Oh, boy.
Not from Rasharita.
Uh-oh.
From somebody else. He has another kid. Oh, he's got plenty of filed against him. Oh, boy. Not from Rasharita. Uh-oh. From somebody else.
He has another kid.
Oh, he's got plenty of kids.
We'll talk about his.
But in college, he's got two now.
He's got two now in college.
He's denying this one, but he's being sued for paternity.
And him and child support are just strange bedfellows that are going to keep running across each other for years and years and years.
There's a lot of police activity involved in that.
1987-88 here.
This is his senior year.
20.2 points a game, 4.2 rebounds, 4.3 assists, 1.8 steals.
And he also breaks the all-time school scoring record.
Wow.
So, I mean, he is hot shit.
And also, too, he has a bunch of other records.
Let's get an in-their in their own words on the scoring record.
Okay?
This is a, he's proud.
They're interviewing about the scoring record.
He could not be more proud of it.
I mean, it's a big shit.
And he's got some things to say.
Did you see the video of this or was it just in print?
This is a print.
Okay.
They didn't have a video of this.
I rarely remember hearing him talk, but I feel like he had like a Shaq monotone voice.
Kind of.
He was an emotional guy.
He's a real outgoing type of guy, we'll say.
Old Mad Max here.
They call him Mad Max.
He's not like, hey, man, how you doing?
He's like, ah, motherfucker.
He's crazy.
In the huddles, they all said you would like him because the coaches would, because they
didn't know what he was going to do and the players liked that.
He'd be like, let's get these motherfuckers right now.
All right, good.
And they'd run out there like he was very, he's the emotional,
whatever of the team, the steam engine of the team.
The Drew Brees.
Yeah, exactly.
Well, more upbeat.
No, Drew Brees is dependable.
This guy's an asshole, but still.
In their own words on the scoring record, quote,
they told me that I wouldn't last a semester.
I had bad study habits.
There was a lot of pressure on me being from this area.
I had a lot of people envious of me when I came here.
And there were a lot of rumors, people saying nasty things about you because of your reputation.
It was scary.
And I was still a wild, outgoing personality.
A lot of rumors going around.
How do rumors get started, James?
Rumors and stereotypes are rumors and stereotypes for reasons, usually.
It's called a reputation, sir.
Yes.
And when he's done with his final game in college, he holds 15 school records.
Holy shit.
And he is second in the whole conference, SCC, the Southeastern Conference.
He is second all time in scoring behind only Pistol Pete Maravich.
Wow.
Who's an NBA Hall of Famer and a legend and just, you know, complete legend.
Granny shot free throw Pete, right?
No, that was Rick Barry.
Oh, Rick Barry.
That was Barry.
Jesus.
Pete was the guy who behind the back passes and he was like the pistol Pete.
So it was crazy.
He's the guy that Jason, non-murdering Jason Williams fashioned his game after basically.
Hilarious.
That's what that is.
There's two.
There's two.
So everything is going terrific, right? It couldn't go bad. I mean, basically. Hilarious. That's what that is. There's two. There's two. So, everything
is going terrific, right? It couldn't go
by. I mean, he's got two kids. I mean, apart from that.
Apart from that, he's going to be able to
pay for them in a minute. He's a college
star. And he's having a great time. Absolutely.
NBA is checking him out. They're looking at
him, and things are going great for him. Couldn't be
a better time. Now he's going to graduate this school,
a legend. He can go back whenever he wants. He's going to
be in the Hall of Honor or whatever, the circle of
Ring of Fame. Yeah, the circle of jerk,
whatever they have there.
They put on with jerseys up there.
Holy shit. Until there's an
investigation. Uh-oh. NCAA
is looking into rumors that Maxwell
did a lot of cocaine before games
and that coaches knew all about it.
So they're investigating the whole program.
They end up uncovering this is the tip of the program. They end up uncovering, this is the tip of the iceberg,
they end up uncovering a plane ticket when they do audits,
two different plane tickets that the coach basically,
Vernon Maxwell accepted plane tickets from the school to go to a basketball camp,
which is not allowed.
Okay.
He has to pay for that on his own.
But it was somehow paid for through the whatever program.
Funneled through boosters.
Exactly.
They find that.
Now, Maxwell has to admit to these violations because he's trying not to screw up his draft status.
The draft is in like a month.
And they just threw a wrench in the whole fucking thing.
Yes.
At the end when they find all of this, all of his scoring records are wiped out,
including the last two seasons of every point he scored
for the last two seasons he was there.
Over a basketball camp.
No, not over that.
Not just over that.
Right.
Also, too, the DEA, Drug Enforcement Agency, is investigating drug selling at University
of Florida.
The DEA has evidence through wiretaps and all sorts of things that Maxwell purchased
cocaine often.
Wow.
He often purchased cocaine.
They have him all sorts of times because they're DEA, these people under surveillance, and
they're selling to Maxwell constantly.
This is the feds, you guys.
This is the feds.
This is not great.
He's in college still.
He's not... They could all go away.
I hadn't even heard of him yet.
No, he could go back to Gainesville and do whatever.
Right.
He could be working at a gas station next week and no one's going to know the difference.
Fixing VCRs.
Never going to know.
It's better than stealing them like Eddie Johnson.
By the way, the most
80s crime ever, stealing a VCR for crack.
You've got to listen to Eddie Johnson. That's a
crazy episode. This is a
similar deal here. Now,
Maxwell is given immunity in the
probe, but he's forced to testify
on college corruption.
They want to know all the corrupt shit that the school's
been doing, basically, which is good. Go get the silver-haired middle-aged white man. Don't to know all the corrupt shit that the school's been doing, basically, which
is good.
Go get the silver-haired middle-aged white man.
Don't blame it on the fucking kid.
So that's good.
I like that in college because they're making all the money.
This kid's getting a little coke on the side, you know, whatever.
So anyway, Maxwell admits to hiring an agent all of his senior year, which is a violation.
Can't do that.
He first claimed that this is great when they asked him about how he had money because he
has money to live and do things.
And buy Coke.
And buy Coke.
Like, how do you have money?
His first excuse was, quote, family, homeboys, and a rich uncle in Miami.
Oh, boy.
Anybody buying that?
No.
I'm not buying that shit at all.
A rich uncle in Miami.
I'm not buying that shit for a second.
Why wouldn't your rich uncle in Miami take care of your mom and get her out of the projects?
Nope.
Nope.
Going to take care of him.
Yeah.
Let him do what he wants. I'll help you get Coke and hire an agent. But your mom and get her out of the projects. Nope. Going to take care of him. Yeah. Let him do what he wants.
I'll help you get coke and hire an agent.
But your mom, fuck that.
She can work three jobs.
Get back to cosmetology school.
Get the hell in there and get your degree.
Get in there, pinky.
So he eventually admits that a University of Florida assistant coach paid him $800 while
he was still in high school and then another $1,000 when he signed.
And then he said under oath, quote, whatever I asked for, I could get.
Wow.
So he's laying it out, telling exactly what's up here.
He estimated that he got about $1,000 a month in cash through his sophomore to senior year,
which isn't bad if you're in school and all of your expenses are paid for because he doesn't have to do anything.
But that's just party money.
That's fucking nothing.
That's nothing. But that's from the school and and then people are giving him coke, and he's
got a free car from a booster, and he's got an apartment through this one, and everything
else is paid for.
Everything's taken care of is basically it.
And it's 1987 also, so the $1,000 a month is way different than it is now.
Yeah.
Now, the school, University of Florida, for all of this, and Maxwell's – they hate Maxwell after this whole thing.
Oh, I'm sure.
He's like a pariah at the school.
Because he sang.
Because he screwed them good.
Well, he screwed the school.
They screwed themselves, but he helped.
They hit that pitchfork that blew the little pitch whistle, and he just sang that tune the whole time.
Yeah, absolutely.
Now, the school is stripped of three scholarships over the next two years.
Oh, fuck.
Which is a lot for basketball.
There's only like 12 guys on the team.
Right. It's banned from the tournament. And also, this is the next two years. Oh, fuck. Which is a lot for basketball. There's only like 12 guys on the team.
It's banned from the tournament.
And also, this is the big one here.
You can ban them from the tournament.
You can do whatever.
But to do this, a college, you know this just made them go, you motherfucker.
This pissed them off.
They also had to pay back all revenue made from the NCAA tournament while Vernon was there.
Oh, my God.
That adds up to $600,000. They have to give back. Holy shit. Cold, hard cash. They have to give back to the NCAA tournament while Vernon was there. Oh, my God. That adds up to $600,000 they have to give back.
Holy shit.
Cold, hard cash they have to give back to the NCAA.
White men shifting in their seats at that moment.
Oh, yeah.
That fucking Vernon.
They're like, did we not give him enough cocaine?
What the fuck happened here?
Should we have given him more?
Because I could have gotten more.
Who gave him the Cadillac?
You heard that he likes other cars.
Why'd you give him the Cadillac?
Come on, God damn it.
Fucking Cadillac.
You guys are assholes, man.
You heard he likes Lincolns.
What the fuck?
What the hell, man?
Get him a...
Come on.
Get him another plane ticket.
Did we not get him enough plane tickets?
Is that it?
Should we have sent him somewhere else?
Shit.
His destination wasn't beautiful enough.
No.
Now, his original silver-haired, middle-aged white man, Rick Swain, from high school, here,
the coach, he's got something to say about this.
He says, quote, the basketball
program had a lot of problems at the time,
and I believe Vernon was unfairly made the
scapegoat. Possibly true.
Yeah, but maybe
the school's kind of the scapegoat.
They both are. Everyone's a scapegoat.
They're both scapegoating each other. That's
what it is. They're like, this fucking kid screwed us,
and he's like, this school, they just gave me money.
I didn't know what to do. Completely fucked that's what i mean they're all pretending but
the one made a lot more money than the other so i'm going to say more guilty school yeah that's
why we say the silver-haired middle-aged white man is usually the the true criminal because he's
the one making money from these biggest benefit yeah so vernon in the draft he is projected to
be a for a mid-first round pick in the NBA draft, which is a big
deal.
Because the second round, you're not really guaranteed you're going to make the team.
If you first round draft, they're going to at least keep you for a year or whatever because
they wasted a first round pick on you.
And literally, the GM looks like an idiot if he drafts someone and then cuts them in
November.
So they're not going to do that.
Anyway, teams are then made aware that he failed three drug tests in his senior year, all for cocaine.
And before the tournament in his senior year, that he had, by the way, a big game against St. John's in the first quarter or the first round and helped Syracuse go to the next round.
In this tournament, he was allowed to skip the pre-tournament drug test.
The school let him skip it.
He was allowed to skip.
He was allowed to skip. He was allowed to skip.
They threw him a cup and he was like, can't pass it.
They're like, okay, fine.
Somebody else, next.
He just failed three drug tests.
And they were like, look, he's going to fail another one.
And this is the tournament.
We're going to make it so he's not failing this test.
So that's what happened.
How the fuck did he get in the NBA?
Well, because they don't care.
This is all behind him.
This is crazy.
We'll clean him up and get him out there.
It doesn't matter.
Also, too, that it shows that he failed to complete three rehab programs he was assigned
to because of failing these tests.
So he doesn't even do the things he's supposed to do when he fucks up.
Right.
He's a mess.
So June 24th, 1988, live from the Felt Forum in New York City, which is the Madison Square
Garden kind of overflow center there, is the NBA draft.
That's what they did back then.
It was like a little thing.
Didn't matter.
Just on the side room of the venue.
Literally.
That's where they have like a nice skating thing or something.
It's like the shit comedy show when the headliner's going on.
You throw them in the side room.
They have the side room over there.
It's like the belly room at the comedy store.
Well, that one's got three that are great rooms.
Yeah, that's fine.
And a shit room across the country.
I don't fucking know. I'm not going to run down some club that I've never been to. No, that's fine. And a shit room across the country. I don't fucking know.
I'm not going to run down some club
that I've never been to.
No, I don't care.
But I know if one's the main room,
I'm assuming the other one
would be the main room if it was better.
So whichever one's better is the main room.
Right.
You got to have an A and a B is all I'm saying.
I'm sure they're terrific, all of them,
but one is not as good as the other, clearly.
That's all it is.
Obviously.
So anyway, we have the draft here.
Danny Manning goes number one to the Clippers.
Yeah, Danny Manning bounced all around the NBA.
Yeah, he sure did.
The oddest shaped head I've ever seen on a person.
Oddest shaped body altogether.
Very skinny.
Super long arms.
Long arms and neck and weird torso.
He's a very oddly put together guy.
Short torso, long arms, long legs, long neck.
Very weird guy.
And like a long, thin head, too.
Very strange man.
He really did.
Really good player, though, Danny.
Not exactly a number one overall draft pick, but a good player.
Deadly 15-foot jumper, though.
Not bad, no.
Deadly.
Rick Smits goes number two.
We remember him, the giant pacer, 7'5", pacers guy who was from one of the Nordic countries.
Sweden, maybe?
I think he was Dutch.
Dutch, there you go, Dutch.
Now, Mitch Richmond goes number five. Great shooter.
Great player Mitch Richmond for the Kings.
I was thinking somebody else. He's a Hall of Famer at this point.
Mitch Richmond. Dan Marley.
Oh how about that? We know from Suns
fame here. He went number 14.
Rod Strickland the point guard went number 19.
Rod Strickland by the way
has been arrested. We will cover him.
He is a piece of shit. I got my eye on you buddy. He's a terrible man. I've already scoped Rod Strickland, by the way, has been arrested. We will cover him. He is a piece of shit. I got my eye on you, buddy.
He's a terrible man.
I've already scoped Rod Strickland out.
He's on the list.
He is awful.
And my eyes lit up when I saw it.
I was like, ooh.
I always mixed him up with Damon Stoudemire.
I could see that.
He's a lot older, though, 10 years older about.
Now, number two, round two, pick number 47, Vernon is finally selected.
So he drops to the mid-second round because of all this shit going on around him.
He's selected by Denver. He went to the Nuggets. Is that right? He drops to the mid-second round because of all this shit going on around him. He's selected by Denver.
He went to the Nuggets, is that right?
He went to the Nuggets, but it's...
He wasn't there long.
He's immediately traded, basically, that day.
I was going to say, I don't think he ever played for them.
No, for a second-round pick in the next draft.
It's a same-day trade.
It's one of those drafts, whatever.
Steve Kerr also picked three picks later than him.
Steve Kerr, the current coach of the Golden State Warriors and pretty damn good role player.
One of the best three-point shooters in history.
And also Anthony Mason, who's—I love Anthony Mason.
Rest in peace.
Rest in peace, Anthony.
He was amazing.
I love Anthony Mason so much.
He was essentially Vernon Maxwell heavy.
You know what I mean?
He was a big Vernon Maxwell.
Scary Vernon Maxwell, basically, with shit written on his head.
That's the stuff I couldn't—we'll get into it another time.
But that's the stuff that—that's why the 90s NBA is the best one ever.
We're going to get into that in just a minute here.
So great.
Even that Knicks team we're talking about here.
Now, 80-89 is his rookie season.
He's with San Antonio his rookie season.
Plays in 79 games out of 82.
So I can't go wrong there.
36 games started, so almost half.
11.7 points a game, 2.6 rebounds, 3.8 assists, 1.1 steals.
Fine for a rookie.
Really fine for a rookie.
That's what you want.
You're like, hey, this is going well here.
You know what I mean?
Good stuff.
Now, 1989, he has a child again.
This is with, not with Rashar child again this is with not with rasharita this is
with myra jenkins if you remember his high school girlfriend somebody rekindled an old flame he's
but he's still with rasharita by the way they're together this whole time she just sticks it out
she way do you get a quote from her you're gonna go man she's either like uh i feel like she's like
an abused person or she's i don't know but she's been through some shit wow i mean she's either like, I feel like she's like an abused person or she's, I don't know.
She's been through some shit.
Wow.
You know what I mean?
She's got PTSD probably.
And she's got a smile on her face.
It's really weird.
They have a boy named Dominique in 1989.
So now he's got more kids.
Oh, by the way, I meant to say this.
In 86, his son was born.
One guess on what he named him?
No.
Of course.
Is he a junior?
Vernon Maxwell Jr.
It's his first born.
It's his first born, Jimmy.
You think he's not going to name him Junior?
Come on.
He's a fucking narcissist.
He's a dipshit.
He would name, I'm sure he's got a cat named Vernon Maxwell.
You know what I mean?
This is my parakeet, Vernon Maxwell.
I'm a dog, Vernon Maxwell.
I got a, like, it's ridiculous.
Everything is Vernon Maxwell.
I got a turtle.
I call him Vernon.
And I got another turtle. I call him Vernon.
And I got another turtle.
I call him Maxwell.
Like he's fucking ridiculous.
Hilarious. So he's playing in San Antonio, 88, 89, 90.
In February, he's arrested in a bar fight, February 1990.
There's a big bar fight in San Antonio.
Vernon breaks a man's front teeth with a punch.
I can see that.
And is arrested for assault, obviously, and is first of, wow, many, many, many arrests.
Now, two weeks later, Rasharita's in the picture again.
Oh, boy.
Two weeks later, Rasharita gets a restraining order against Vernon because he threw her
to the floor during an argument and broke her wrist.
What she heard about that kid.
This is a year later.
This is another argument.
Who knows?
Who knows with this guy?
It could be anything.
It could be literally anything with this guy.
The list is so long.
So February 21st, 1990, which is about six days after the Rasharita restraining order incident, he is sold by the Rockets.
Or sold to the Rockets by the Spurs.
They sold him. They're done. For $25 Rockets by the Spurs. They sold him.
They're done.
For $25,000 they sold him for.
They want him out.
Let's get rid of him.
And Vernon says that he was, quote, sold like a piece of meat.
Yeah, that's what you're in the NBA.
They could have traded you like meat, which is better.
You're bashing the patrons of bars in the town of San Antonio.
And you're throwing your wife to the floor, breaking her limbs.
The best part is after the fight in San Antonio,
they interviewed him a couple days later,
and he goes, I love San Antonio.
The people here are the best.
The ones I don't want to punch are spectacular.
All of them are great.
So 89-90 season.
This is all Spurs, Rockets, half and half season here.
He plays in 79 games,
9 points a game, 2.9 rebounds,
3.7 assists, 1.1 steals.
So he's bounced from team to team trying to find a role
here. He'll come up, he'll come into
his own. January 26,
1991, he has
51 points in a game versus Cleveland.
I remember that. That's a big deal.
51 points is a lot. He scored 30
points in a quarter, which at the time I believe he was only the eighth person to score 30 points in a quarter.
He was the type of guy, he could shoot.
He had a beautiful outside jumper.
Yeah, he did.
And he could take it to the rack, too, because he was tough.
But he had a beautiful outside jumper, and he was streaky.
When he got hot, he was burying shots.
Watch out.
And it would be, I mean, there's a lot of, if you watch Vernon Maxwell highlights, it's like three-minute things on YouTube,
there are so many shots of him like getting a ball before it gets off,
before it goes out of bounds to the side and just turning it around
and chucking it up and hitting it through.
And it goes in.
Because he's that kind of clutch player.
He's just clutch.
He's very clutch.
So good.
But streaky also.
And that's the guy you want with the ball in his hand at the end of the game
if he's on a streak.
That's what I mean.
Teammates love him because he's streaky.
He's fiery.
He's tough.
During this whole time, he wanted to be up Michael Jordan's ass.
He wanted to kick Michael Jordan's ass all the time.
Like, constant fighting with him and Michael Jordan.
Whenever the Rockets played the Bulls, it was those two scuffling, and there would be
things where people would overhear Michael Jordan telling him, like, let's just play
the game, man.
Come on.
Why are we doing this? And Vernon would be like, that means I got in his head. Yeah telling him, like, let's just play the game, man. Come on. Why are we doing this?
And Vernon would be like, that means I got in his head.
Yeah.
If I said, if he says, let's just play the game.
If he acknowledges it.
Yeah.
And doesn't just laugh about it.
He's like, why?
You know, this is, you don't need to be doing this shit.
Because he'd be like cheap shotting him.
Right.
You know, putting his knee in the back of his knee and digging his, you know, he's trying to mess with him.
Yeah.
Trying to put him off his game, which, hey, he's tough.
That's the game.
Yeah.
When you're playing against Michael Jordan, what the fuck else are you going to do?
Yeah, you're going to guard the guy normally.
You're going to let him square up and then hit a turnaround jumper?
No.
Just drive past you and dunk?
No.
So 90-91, 82 games played every game of the season.
Wow.
Starts 79 of them, so he's in the rotation now.
17 points a game, 2.9 rebounds, 3.7 assists, 1.5 steals.
So a fine season.
Absolutely.
He's coming into his own.
That 25 grand looks well spent by the Rockets right now. Absolutely.
He earned his starter fucking role for sure.
Definitely.
91-92.
Again, 80 games played, 80 games started.
Starts every game he plays.
17.2 points a game, 3 rebounds, 4.1 assists, and 1.3 steals.
So he's just every year he's getting consistent.
He's good.
Now July of 1992, offseason, hanging out in Houston.
Fourth of July.
Vernon likes the nightlife, guys.
Yeah, he does.
Vernon loves the nightlife.
And we have a thing later on about exactly how much.
But here, he's hanging out in Houston at a place called the Yucatan Liquor Stand, which sounds very upstanding.
It's a bar that has the word liquor in it,
which means you come here and you get drunk and fight, basically.
That's what you do.
They need to squeegee the floor every night for puke.
They have seven beers on tap,
but they've got every whiskey you've ever heard of.
Yes, and every flavor of every booze and all that kind of shit.
Now, an argument breaks out over the line.
There's a line outside.
Something happens.
Vernon's mouthy because he's mouthy. That's how he is. A police officer. Look at this shiny head I want in there now. Yes, I'm on the line. There's a line outside. Something happens. Vernon's mouthy because he's mouthy. That's how he is. A police
officer. Look at this shiny head I want in there now.
I'm on the rockets. Why am I
not inside? So a police
officer comes to kind of settle the deal
here and he decides to shove
the police officer pretty goddamn
hard. Hard enough to be arrested for assault
on the police officer. So now
that's dumb as shit. That's as dumb
as you can do.
This is when I watched so much NBA and I never heard of this.
Never heard any of this.
Now this is dumber than shoving down your wife.
This is a police officer.
He's in a uniform.
He's going to arrest you. He's got a shiny badge and a gun.
He's going to arrest you.
And handcuffs.
Now he said, now this makes sense, here's an in their own words on growing up and why
he's like this. It's not my fault. Listen, in their own words here's an in their own words on growing up and why he's like
this.
He's like, that's not my fault.
Listen, in their own words on life.
In their own words, quote, when I came up, my grandfather always told me, ain't no man
better than you.
He put his pants on just like you do.
Don't be scared of no man.
That's the way I've lived my life.
Even if they're a police officer with a gun telling me to please stop before I become
arrested.
He put his pants on one leg at a time, too, so he's equal to fight.
And then he put his gun belt and his handcuffs on also, which was an advantage of his.
And then he pinned a badge to his chest and swore an oath.
He became a different person than you, exactly, at that point.
No man better than you, except the police.
You should probably not shove them, because they'll shoot you.
They'll shoot you or take you to jail.
That's bad shit.
So now, 92.
By the way, he sounded like a very old black man.
Old timey.
You could tell.
Ain't no man better than you.
Ain't no man better than you.
I feel like he called him boy a lot.
Yeah.
Now, boy ain't no man better than you now.
Won't be taking no shit.
He's very foghorn leghorn.
Yeah, yeah.
Old black guys.
I think foghorn leghorn was black.
I really do.
I think you're probably right. Yeah, I think you're right. He was definitely based upon. Yeah, yeah. All black guys. I think Foghorn Leghorn was black. I really do. I think that's right. You're probably right.
Yeah, I think you're right.
He's definitely based upon.
Yeah, totally.
So 92-93 season.
He plays in 71 games, 68 started, 13.8 points a game, 3.1 rebounds, 4.2 assists, 1.2 steals.
Wow.
Continues to have good times.
Yeah.
I mean, they're liking him here.
Summer of 93, after the season, Vernon's wife has a stillborn daughter that's
rough on him now he has rough on him it's rough on well it's rough i don't know we don't have
anything about racharita she's clearly it's already damaged i'm sure that fucked her up all
we know is what he has out of this whole thing right he's the whatever but he wears again
apparently they were going to name the little girl Amber. He writes Amber on his shoes for a couple of years on every pair of shoes that he has on top of his high tops over this.
Now, this would have been his third child with his wife because they also had a daughter in 1991 named Ariel, which that's Little Mermaid time.
So Little Mermaid just came out.
So, yeah, Ariel.
Don't do that.
No.
Stop it.
So they have Vernon Jr. and Ariel.
They're bad at naming kids.
And then he's got the other ones all over the place.
He's got Dominique.
He's got some other one that we don't even know where the hell he came from.
Who knows?
So yeah, stillborn daughter, summer of 93.
This affects the couple.
You know, it's tough.
I can imagine.
It's got to be really brutal.
That's not a miscarriage.
That's all the way through.
I can't imagine what that's like.
You fucking painted a room.
Yeah.
You were ready.
You bought shit.
You bought a crib.
You got a walker.
Yeah.
You got a new fucking swing because the old one was worn out.
People are showing up in the waiting room handing you cigars.
You had boy stuff and now you went and got a bunch of girl stuff.
You were set up.
Shit out of luck.
So March 15th, 1994.
This is during the 94 season, which is a really eventful season for the Rockets, for Vernon.
It's huge.
Vernon is arrested in Houston.
Shocker.
This is dumb.
He and a group of friends were leaving a Luby's parking lot.
Do you know what Luby's is?
Why is he eating at Luby's?
Luby's is, if you don't know what Luby's is, if you're not from the U.S., which a lot of our listeners aren't.
It's not just called Luby's.
It's Luby's Cafeteria.
Cafeteria.
And that's what it is.
It says that shit on the sign.
It's like where old people would go in the hospital to eat dinner. That's where shit cafeteria. Cafeteria. And that's what it is. It's basically. That says that shit on the sign. It's like where old people would go in the hospital to eat dinner.
That's where it is.
I feel like they sell a lot of tapioca pudding and things like that.
It's terrible.
People leave the hospital.
Old people leave the hospital for their fucking, for their gallstones, their kidney stones.
And they're on their way home.
And the wife's like, would you like to get some food?
I've eaten hospital food for the past three weeks.
They're like, let's just go here.
It's the same.
It's soft on your stomach.
Yeah, it is.
Want some bread pudding?
Fucking gross.
I don't know why a wealthy NBA player is eating at Luby's, but he's eating at Luby's.
He's eating meatloaf.
He and his friends are leaving the parking lot when a car cuts them off.
So do they just wait for him to go by?
They yell a little out the window.
Hey, fuck you, buddy.
They give him a finger. No. Maxwell waves fuck you, buddy. Give him the finger.
No.
Maxwell waves a gun at him.
He's full of fucking bread pudding.
He's plenty pissed.
He's waving a gun.
That's his idea.
I think I'll just wave a gun around.
We'll do that.
So this guy calls the police.
This guy waved a gun.
The police pull him over in his Porsche a little while down the road.
A guy with a milk dud head in a Porsche was waving a gun at me.
I think I'll find him.
So they pull him over about a block away and find a.380 pistol on the floorboard.
So there you go.
There it is.
That's the gun that they said he had.
Case closed.
So now he's shit out of luck there.
I know in Texas, you can have guns all you want, but you can't have handguns just on
the floorboard of your car.
That's apparently a no-no.
And that's not smart on his part.
No.
He's so easy to find.
Oh, absolutely. He's the only guy driving around
Luby's in a Porsche. How many Porsches do you think
left Luby's that afternoon? Probably not a lot.
So in this gun charge, eventually
he is fined $1,500
in order to publicly apologize
to the children of Houston for being a
shit role model.
Oh, this was around the Charles Barkley time.
Well, this was just the whole
deal with the kids were really looking up to players now he does this but adds a little caveat
to the to the thing he also said he wrote his own apology well he apologized and said he shouldn't
do that but he also said he will continue to carry a weapon this is not what the judge told him to do
at all and he says in their own words quote you can have a rifle with you as long as you don't hide it.
I may get me a shotgun.
That is not what the judge ordered him to fucking do.
Judge said, go apologize to the kids.
You're acting like a jerk off with these guns. He went out and
goes, I think I just need a different gun. That's my problem.
I was waving a small gun. I needed to wave a
shotgun out the fucking window because that's legal.
Wow. I'm going to put
a coon hound in my fucking passenger seat
and run around with a double barrel.
I think it's safe to say he doesn't get it.
I think he just doesn't get what he's supposed to be doing here.
Not at all.
How about act right, dickhead?
Yeah, that's a start.
That's what the judge was trying to tell you to do.
The judge was trying to tell you to be a good role model.
He saw a loophole.
He's like, well, a handgun.
He's pissed at the handgun.
Just tell him to get a shotgun.
That's fine.
Unreal. Unreal.
So April 1994, he is ejected from a game but refuses to leave the court.
So the league fines him $10,000 for that because you can't fucking do that.
Do you know what it was over?
I don't know.
It was a regular objection.
I feel like I remember that.
He got ejected a lot.
Did he go sit on the bench?
No, I think he was arguing still on the court. And they were like, you got to go, you got to go. And he eventually got fined a lot. Did he go sit on the bench? I think he was arguing still on the court.
And they were like, you got to go, you got to go.
And he eventually got fined.
This was around the era when he had a big fight with Charles Barkley on the Suns.
Do you remember that?
Olajuwon went up to – it was the end of the game and Olajuwon went up for a layup.
The Rockets were up by 10 in the waning seconds.
He goes up for a layup and Barkley just drilled him in the chest and knocked him down.
That's NBA play, babe.
Vernon Maxwell came running to fight Barkley and they were just getting, it was crazy.
He gets in a lot of NBA fights now.
Now, also in 1994, this is a very eventful year, Hakeem Olajuwon, the legendary Hall
of Fame center, Hakeem Olajuwon is trying to convert Vernon to Islam.
He's trying to give him religion.
We don't need Vernon having any religion.
That's going to only get worse for us.
But he reaches, he preaches to Vernon.
Vernon listens.
He'll sit and he'll listen.
And then he goes to nightclubs and fucks girls and drinks and does his thing.
Olajuwon said, quote, Max is very interested.
Conversion is ultimately the goal.
But first you have to learn about it.
Talk about it.
Learn the concepts.
Step toward the right direction.
I wish Hakeem talked like that.
Don't you?
That's so great. He didn't you? That's so great.
He didn't say.
That's so crisp and clear.
If you write it down, he sounds brilliant.
But then you add in a very heavy African accent and you go, wow, that's amazing.
He speaks English now.
Well, that's incredible.
You read that and you go, that's great for a guy.
It's his second language.
And he just spurted that out to a reporter.
That's pretty impressive.
Now, Vernon, of the whole religion thing, he says he, quote, likes the message, but I really want to go slow
with it. It's like, yeah, I'm not going to stop drinking
and fucking, so I don't know. Take it easy, air up
there. I'm going to be over here. I'll be over here.
I don't need this shit. I'm not your Kevin Bacon
dick-eye. Fuck out of here.
So, 1994, there's an article about
basically this reporter has like a night
out on the town with Vernon Maxwell,
and it is fucking ridiculous.
He's such an idiot. Oh, I'd love to do it. A 1994. And it is fucking ridiculous. Oh, God, what I would give it. He's such an idiot.
Oh, I'd love to do it.
A 1994.
That would be so fun.
Amazing.
So he goes to a bar called The Bait Shop is the name of the bar.
It's a dive bar.
He likes dive bars because he likes to feel like the hottest shit going in there.
Yeah, the biggest guy there.
Yeah, so basically they talk about how he'll be in the locker room.
He'll be talking to Olajuwon.
Olajuwon will be preaching religion.
And then somebody else will be like, hey, Vernon, and crack the cooler.
And he's like, oh, I'm going to go get a beer now.
And I guess they have a keg in the locker room there.
The Rockets had a keg.
Yeah, so after the game, they'd all have a couple of beers and hang out.
That's amazing.
So he would have a couple of beers there.
And then it was nighttime.
It was time to go out.
And we'll find out.
His wife will find out all about it.
But he goes to this dive bar.
The bar has $1.50 jello shots.
Put it that way.
You know you're not in a high-class establishment when there are under $2 jello shots.
Jello shots are available at all.
You're in the wrong place if you're an adult.
But anyway.
They come in those shitty plastic cups.
You squeeze them out.
You squeeze them to get them loose from the edges.
Horrible. And then you just fucking pound it down.
It's so gross.
That's what he's doing.
Well, he's not doing that.
But he's in a place where others are doing that.
He's wearing a $1,500 custom-made burnt gold suit.
Oh, my God.
That's what he's wearing.
His suit is burnt gold.
That's the color of it.
$1,500.
Custom-made, honestly, I don't know how an NBA player would get anything not custom-made.
Right.
Because Vernon's 6'5".
He's 6'5", and kind of muscular.
Right.
People aren't...
Don't sell that shit at JCPenney.
Human beings aren't built 6'5 and athletic normally.
So, yeah, they need to make that for him.
Plus, you know, he's got the money.
What the fuck?
He's hanging out with his pals.
Oh, my.
His pals' names are Peanut and Fizz.
Yep.
Those are his pals.
I was going to say, they are not Clyde Drexler.
They are not Robert Ori.
No.
They are not...
Peanut and Fizz.
Yeah.
They are terrible people.
Fizz is a large guy. Yeah. People think he's Vernon's bodyguard, but he's Ori. No. They are not. Peanut and Fizz. They are terrible people. Fizz is a large guy.
People think he's Vernon's bodyguard, but he's not.
He befriended him after he got into the NBA.
And he even says, like, man, hanging out in the NBA, hanging out in the NBA play, you get a lot of girls.
That's what he's like.
Basically, he's just like, I'm using Vernon for, you know, girls come, shit, I don't know.
So he's hanging out with Peanut and Fizz.
When girls come to talk to Vernon, they talk to Fizz first and ask Fizz to introduce him because they feel like he's hanging out with peanut and fizz when girls come to talk to vernon they talk to
fizz first and ask fizz to introduce him because they feel like he's the bodyguard so they're like
hey can you introduce me so there's this one particular incident that happens where three
blonde girls come up to fizz with vernon maxwell sitting right next to him but they talk to fizz
and they say they're big fans and they want to talk to vernon so fizz this is how they're treating
people fizz nudges vernon right next to him right in front of this girl and go, doesn't she
have nice tits?
Jesus.
That's her response.
Vernon nods and shrugs his shoulders.
They're all right.
And the girl, rather than being like, hey, fuck you, she starts fondling her tits.
Wow.
To be like, look at these tits.
Yeah, I want to hang out with you.
This is what I mean.
They're girls from rap videos.
That's what I mean.
These guys are horrible people that are right now treating people like dog shit.
And they're like, yeah, here are my tits.
They are nice.
Look at them.
I'm like, what the fuck?
They're treating people like dog shit because people expect it and then they don't say anything.
No, they don't mind.
So how would you not?
That's what I mean.
It's like a kid that keeps getting away with anything.
They're going to keep doing it.
They're going to treat you like that because you fucking let them.
If you can just take cookies before dinner, you're going taking cookies it's gonna stop you it's it's like when your kid
fucking tells you no and you think it's cute and you smile at it and go along your day they're
gonna tell you no again because you just thought that shit was funny exactly that's what happens
uh maxwell says he likes the bar because the quote the cops don't mess with him here which
why would they be messing with that and you tell the chick she's got nice tits and she starts
rubbing them because you're in a shithole white trash bar with $1.50 jello shots.
There's probably college kids hanging out there like, I got tits.
Look at them.
Oh, God.
Ridiculous.
Now his wife, Rasharita, what do you think she's thinking about all this?
He's out.
This is in the paper in 94.
He's out in the town.
He's looking at blonde girls and all this shit.
She's thinking she's got to get nicer tits.
I don't know.
She says, quote, Vernon has always been a person who hangs out with the guys.
He's been that way since we were in the fourth grade.
It's just his nature.
He's a complex, difficult person.
Can you write that into an email and forward it to my wife?
She says people should just accept Vernon for Vernon.
Look, he goes out to bars and he gets arrested and he punches people and drinks a lot and fucks blonde girls.
And you know what?
You should accept him for that.
I have.
It's okay.
I've got three kids with him.
It's okay.
It's fine.
It's unreal.
Hey.
If I can tolerate it.
Fuck me.
What are you doing, lady?
Now we have a quote from Vernon.
Holy shit.
I wish my wife was so forgiving.
That's what I mean.
There's another quote that's even worse.
Wait till you hear this next quote after this one, because we're going to have a little
dueling quotes between the two of them, and we'll see they're both on different planets
here.
If I don't pull the weeds, my wife would love to put out a press release.
Jimmy is the laziest piece of shit.
This lady, you could be in a bar fondling tits and have it be in the paper.
And she's like, well, you know, you got to love Vernon for Vernon.
You know what I mean?
Understanding.
Jimmy likes nipples.
Leave him alone.
Come on.
Who doesn't like nipples?
He's just, he's an adult and it's fine.
And everybody has nipples.
We all have nipples.
I mean, it's not a big deal.
So we have an in their own words here on this partying situation.
Yeah.
He says in their own words, quote, I ain't alcoholic.
Yeah.
Well, someone leads with that.
First of all, that's, I ain't alcoholic. Someone leads with that first of all.
I ain't alcoholic.
You're an alcoholic.
Start over.
In their own words, quote, I ain't alcoholic, but I hang with the boys every day.
I wouldn't change that for anything in the world.
Anything in the world.
I'll just keep going out there and doing things I do.
That's just the way I am.
I feel like I'm under a microscope here in Houston. I just hang out at places and people
come up and they ask me, Mad Max, are you really
crazy? Everybody thinks I'm this
wild militant guy. I'm really not that
way. I'm very laid back.
Obviously, as we've seen so far, he's extremely
laid back. This guy, I don't know.
You know what it is?
He had two choices in life. He's like, I can be
an NBA player or a librarian.
The librarian lifestyle fits me more.
The personality.
It's more me to be around the quiet and the books.
But I'm going to go for the NBA, I think.
I've got to hang with the boys.
I need the money.
So I hang with them every day.
I'm an alcoholic, but I hang with the boys every day.
I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.
My wife, my kids, anything.
Fuck it.
I need to go out and watch blonde girls fondle their tits.
I got to.
Unreal. So you're got it. Unreal.
So you're an alcoholic.
Yeah, that's what an alcoholic is.
Now, his wife on this, she has a statement here.
She says, quote, Vernon and I have an understanding.
Holy shit.
It's a mutual.
It's about mutual respect.
I understand him and he understands me.
I'm not trying to change him.
I love him for him.
Wow.
That is unreal.
So she basically says, look, he fucks people and I, you know. I love him for him. Wow. That is unreal.
So she basically says, look, he fucks people.
And I, you know, I just look the other way.
And that's our understanding.
That's the understanding.
And then he fucks me and I have more kids. And I have more kids.
Jesus.
I told him, only impregnate me.
That's our understanding.
You can only impregnate me.
You can go out and do whatever you want.
But, you know, only impregnate me.
That's unbelievable.
Now, he has an in their own words on the wife situation here.
This is a great back and forth.
This is like a conversation here.
Through the media.
Through the media.
He says, in their own words, quote, she gives me my freedom.
That's why we're still together.
I tried a couple of girls.
They were just too bossy.
It just wasn't right.
Too much pressure, man.
I already got enough pressure on me.
I ain't dealing with these bitches and their pressure.
What the fuck are you talking about?
You've been married since college. I tried't dealing with these bitches and their oppression. What the fuck are you talking about? You've been married since
college. I tried
a couple of girls. You haven't
tried a couple of girls. I tried a couple of girls.
You got a couple of girls pregnant.
Too bossy. Well, no, he's been seeing
people. Who knows? He's probably had four girlfriends
at the same time.
I tried. You're married.
You shouldn't be trying girls.
But that's what he does.
She lets me fuck around.
So I say, yeah, she's all right.
Unbelievable.
I'll stick with her for a while.
Too bossy.
It's crazy.
Now on the court.
Yeah.
Great year.
Yeah.
75 games played, 13.6, 3.1, 5.1 assists, 1.7 steals.
Having a great year on the floor.
On the floor also, too.
The Rockets have an incredible year.
They go all the way through to the NBA Finals, and they beat the New York Knicks in seven games and break my goddamn 15-year-old heart.
16, June.
Unreal.
I was so fucking mad at this series, it's not even funny.
I have two basketball teams I like.
Quick sports sidebar.
I like the Knicks, and I like the Phoenix Suns.
They have one thing in common.
Neither of them have won a goddamn title
in 45 fucking years. Never
in my lifetime have I been happy at the result
of an NBA season. It's very rare that you have to watch
them play each other, either. That's helpful.
No, well, that's good. Yeah, but these two, the Knicks,
the Suns lost the year before to the
Bulls, and then the Knicks make it, and I'm like,
okay, maybe we'll get it this year.
The series goes seven games, and
then John fucking Starks goes two for 19 in game seven,
just firing up threes, and fucking Riley leaves him in there.
I just leave him in there.
Let him go.
Go to the corner this time.
Go for the hard one.
Really chuck him up there.
Finally has to yank him out.
Skip the backboard.
Yeah.
After he's wasted eight fucking possessions in a row, he finally takes him out.
Vernon Maxwell ends up having 21 points that game.
Him and Kenny Smith both have big games. That's right. Kenny Smith was on that team. Yeah finally takes him out. Vernon Maxwell ends up having 21 points that game. Him and Kenny Smith both have big games.
That's right. Kenny Smith was on that team.
Yeah, the current analyst.
So that ends up, they win the NBA
title. Parade for Vernon.
Now it's parade time.
So he is super psyched. This is June of
94. Life could not be better.
July of 94, wife gets another
restraining order against him. Good grief.
She's pregnant this time and she's filing for divorce against him also.
She files papers.
So much for we understand each other.
Yeah, that was two months ago that they understood each other.
Now, not so fucking understanding anymore.
We have such a misunderstanding that we need a divorce.
We need a divorce, and a restraining order is against both him and his business manager
for some financial shit to not mess with accounts
and do all this.
So basically, I hope Peanut isn't his business manager.
I'd like you to meet my business manager, Peanut.
No, I don't think so.
Mr. Maxwell, we're going to discuss your new shoe line.
Could you just do that with my manager, Peanut?
Fuck no.
We're out of here.
Peanut does all my taxes.
Anything tax related, it's Peanut.
We're going to go talk to Penny Hardaway right now.
Yeah, it's perfect.
So 1995 in Houston, 94, 95 season, Vernon gets in a locker room fight with teammate
Carl Herrera.
All right.
I remember him too.
Vernon hits Carl Herrera with a dumbbell.
Get out of here.
Then marches out and says, I'm going to get my gun out of my car.
So he hit a man with a dumbbell, which is extremely violent.
Like which size?
And you can kill a guy.
Doesn't matter.
Is it the retard strength one?
I don't know.
We'll ask Dotsick about that.
I don't know what size it was, but any size dumbbell, you can't be swinging at people, I don't think.
I kind of blame Herrera in this situation, because if somebody's got a dumbbell and they're trying to hit you with it, it's going to be hard to hit.
Who knows if he was even facing him?
Yeah, that's a good point.
We have no idea.
He's a psychopath.
If they're facing each other and he got hit with a dumbbell, he's a fucking idiot.
I guess so.
You wouldn't expect your teammate in the locker room to take a dumbbell swing at you either, maybe.
Did he hit him with it or did he throw it at him?
No, he hit him with it.
Fuck.
He hit him with it and then he said, I'm going to get my gun and marched
outside. So that's not great.
Somehow they defuse that
situation and say, please Vernon, don't shoot people.
Don't get your gun. Not in the...
You've already... I wonder if it's a shotgun.
Did he get the shotgun? Christ, come in
with that. Did he get the double barrel?
What now, motherfucker? Wow.
So February 7th,
1995 is one of the most entertaining incidents in the history of the NBA.
This is amazing.
Okay.
I've never seen this before.
It's never happened before.
I don't think it's happened since except for one slightly, but not in this way.
Okay.
It is February 7th, 1995.
The Rockets are in Portland.
They're losing badly to Portland at this point.
It's in the third quarter.
In the third quarter, things have gotten testy in this game. Chris
Dudley and Otis Thorpe. Remember Otis Thorpe?
He looked like he was 60
years older. God, was he ugly. He was so
ugly. Big guy, though. Huge guy.
6'10", 6'11". Power forward? Yeah, power
forward. He gets into it with Chris Dudley,
who was a white guy who went to Harvard.
Big fucking goofy fuck. Yeah, he went to Harvard,
I believe, too. Or Yale, Yale. He went to Yale, Dudley.
Not a fighter. They get into a fight, though. And Dudley's a big guy, though. Or Yale, Yale. He went to Yale, Dudley. Not a fighter.
They get into a fight, though.
And Dudley's a big guy, though. He's a senator.
Thorpe chokes Dudley, and Dudley spikes a basketball off of him.
I do remember that.
So both of them get ejected.
That's how goofy white guys fight.
They huck the basketball.
He was being choked at the time, so I don't think he had much of a choice.
So this starts, it's a testy game anyway
but now like now they're all looking to take shots at each other and all sorts of things so
uh in the crowd okay this is about 330 left in the third quarter portland is up 79 52 it's an
ass whooping it's a blowout players are wanting to get ejected just to get the fuck out of there
probably just to fucking save the humiliation of walking off the
court with the team. Yeah. In the
crowd, about 11 rows up,
is a 35-year-old man named Steve
George. Everyone's going,
why are we knowing a fan? Why are we talking about a fan?
The guy in fucking Section B.
He's in row L
actually is what he says later on, which
should be row 12, but it's row 11 for some
reason. Whatever. They skip a row. They skip a row. Anyway, row one is the court which should be row 12, but it's row 11 for some reason. Whatever.
They skip a row.
They skip a row.
Anyway, row one is the court.
I don't know.
But he's right there.
He's near the Rockets bench.
Now, he's there.
He's in from Atlanta.
He is visiting his brother in Portland.
And they got tickets and they went to watch the game.
Okay?
Like I said, 3.30 left. Great game to go watch.
Yeah, great.
90s Portland team.
Fuck yeah. The Rockets of that period. This is a fun team to go watch. Yeah, great. 90s Portland team. Fuck yeah.
The Rockets of that period.
This is a fun team to be watching.
Drexler and Porter and Cummings.
Well, Drexler comes a little later here in this season.
This is the season he comes.
So he's in Portland then?
Yes.
Oh, so he's on that team.
Yeah, because Drexler goes to the Rockets later.
That's a great game.
Yeah, absolutely.
So, apparently George is heckling Maxwell.
Uh-oh.
Who has, and a lot of people probably are.
What the fuck? Maxwell's got five points and a lot of people probably are, Maxwell's
got five points and four fouls at this point in time.
I want to know the shit he said to him.
He's having a shit game.
Now, we have the things he said, because there's a ton of witnesses.
He's sitting in a section with a hundred other people.
Everyone heard him talk.
What kind of heckles are they?
Are they good?
No.
It's not even, this is what I'm saying here.
Maxwell, basically, people around George said that they heard him saying to Maxwell,
nice game, you got five points, real nice
game. Bullshit. They're just,
they're not even saying bad shit. They're just like, yeah, nice game.
And then they laugh and they drink their beer
and they talk about their kids probably. It's two brothers
sitting there. Well, after a little
while of this, apparently, I don't know, I think
he just wanted to leave the game. Maxwell has
had enough.
He, in the middle of nowhere, while they're playing the game leave the game. Maxwell has had enough. He, in the middle of nowhere
while they're playing the game, the game's
moving, he bounds up
the stairs of the stands.
I'm talking two steps at a time
running up to this guy
and just fucking wallops him.
He runs up into the 11th
row and socks a fan in the face.
I've never seen that before
or since. I mean, we had the Ron Artest thing in Indiana, but that spilled into the crowd and then they were there and he a fan in the face. I've never seen that before. That's so crazy. Or since.
I mean, we had the Ron Artest thing in Indiana, but that spilled into the crowd.
And then they were there and he thought a guy hit him.
This was just, fuck, this guy ran up and socked him one.
The Ron Artest one, the guy actually assaulted him.
Yeah.
Granted, it was a cop.
The wrong guy assaulted him.
He hit the wrong guy.
But still, that was this guy.
He just ran up and the guy looked surprised.
He's like, huh?
What the fuck?
What are you doing up here?
Don't you have a game to fucking half finish?
He runs.
Robert Ori doesn't know what's going on.
So he runs up there with him to see what's up.
Maxwell punches this George guy.
And Ori's like, holy shit.
He didn't expect that.
What are you doing?
Don't do that.
So also, too, in the stands is an assistant coach, too.
It's a mess.
It's completely ridiculous.
The coaches even went up.
One of the assistant coaches, too, because they didn't know what was going on.
So he just ran up there, too.
Basically, yeah, he reaches George.
He punches him.
Now, George says he tries to shove Maxwell off.
That's all he did.
He said, I didn't hit him.
I tried to shove him off because he was punching me.
Ori and the assistant coach, Larry Smith,
tried to make sense of the whole thing, basically,
and drag Maxwell off of him.
Witnesses say that Ori didn't throw any punches
and just seemed to be insanely surprised by the whole thing. Just like, look of like say that Ori didn't throw any punches and just seemed to be insanely surprised
by the whole thing. Just like, look of like
that I didn't expect. That's not
one. Like, I don't know if he thought maybe somebody
threw something at Maxwell and he was going up to like, hey
what the fuck or whatever, but then he was like, you just punched
that guy. I don't think you're allowed to do that.
So anyway, yeah, it's a disaster.
All three, Larry Smith, Ori
and Maxwell all leave the arena before
talking to the media.
They go back and they're all leave the arena before talking to the media. They go back in.
They're gone before the game's over.
This is so great.
Get the fuck out of here.
Now, Akeem Olajuwon, they talked to.
He's a team leader here.
He says, quote, everybody's supposed to be a man and be responsible for your action.
So I don't think it was wise to go into the crowd.
And we'll pay the price because they're going to be suspended.
There was no excitement on the court, though.
It was 59-62 or whatever.
He made that shit at 52.
52. That's what I mean. 79-52.
It's a blowout. Somebody
needs to get punched to make this shit exciting.
It's exciting now, goddammit. So now
George, the fan who got hit, he's asked about it
right there, like they say, while
he was holding an ice pack on his jaw.
He was interviewed. He said,
quote, absolutely I'm pressing charges. He hit
me square. I was hit by an NBA player in the face while I was sitting in Rowell, and I'm not happy.
I'm a fan yelling about the game.
I was definitely riding Vernon, you know, five points and four fouls.
You're not having a good night.
I don't deserve to get hit in the face for that.
All I know is when I walked out of there, I probably had six business cards handed to me from people saying I saw him hit you.
I'm a witness. I'm a witness.
I'm a witness.
So he knows he's got a lawsuit.
I'm a witness.
If you sue, I could use three grand.
Yeah, whatever.
We'll talk about it.
Dinner or something.
Something.
We'll just talk about it.
Something.
Something.
Tell you what.
What if I get outside and I get him to wave my gun at me and we can sue him together in a class action?
We'll get a class action going on.
Just ask him if he's got a shotgun on you.
When he waves it at you, just fucking start suing.
Nope.
Start suing.
Start suing.
Break out the lawsuits.
So two days later, February 9th, the NBA suspends Maxwell for at least 10 games.
And he'll be basically reevaluated at the end of 10 games.
Basically seeing if the story blows over.
Like, are people still pissed?
All right, fine.
You can stick us in that for a couple more.
Does attendance drop?
Yeah.
How mad are our fans?
So at least he didn't hit a comb fan.
That's one thing.
The Houston fans probably thought it was great.
Right.
Like, yeah, fuck that guy.
At least he hit a trailblazer fan.
Fuck Portland.
And he's not even, he's from Atlanta.
He doesn't even care.
He's probably a Hawks fan or something.
Who knows?
He just likes basketball.
He likes basketball.
That's it.
He likes to watch basketball.
So anyway, he's suspended for 10 games and he's fined $20,000, which is the highest He just likes basketball. He likes basketball. He likes to watch basketball.
So anyway, he's suspended for 10 games, and he's fined $20,000,
which is the highest fine, tied for the highest fine in history to that point.
Nobody got 20.
10 is the standard. And George's heckle is tied for worst heckle of all time.
Yeah, it wasn't even a heckle.
That's a terrible heckle.
I'm sure there was 5,000 other people saying the exact same thing.
Or something.
There was probably at least 500 saying something at least clever.
Or at least somebody where it was like, you fucking suck, Maxwell, like that.
But no, he was just like, yeah, nice game, five points.
Next thing you know, he's got a 6'5 guy bounding the steps to punch him in the fucking world.
That's the guy that's trotting up and down that court thinking that in his head the whole time.
And then some asshole happens to verbally say it and he just loses it.
I've been thinking of this whole game.
I know.
And how well I was going to say how quiet is the crowd, but it's a blowout.
So people are just kind of sitting on their hands.
Now, Steve George's attorney, Richard Maziel, said that George would be signing a criminal complaint with the D.A.
and that there's likely to be a civil suit. Well, we knew that was coming that's the whole point of the whole thing
here maxwell's lawyer this guy's an asshole maxwell's lawyer dick daguerrin said that george
was hurling racial slurs that no one else heard god daguerrin said wait a year about daguerrin
this is a silver-haired asshole right here this This is a silver-haired, middle-aged white man to the extreme.
Because wait till you hear who he's represented in the past.
Oh, Christ. He said, quote,
this is just my reaction, but from
what Vernon said about the incident,
if I'd have been there, I'd have probably cold-cocked
him, too. You can't think of any more
vulgar, more fighting words than what that
guy said to Vernon. Mother Teresa would
have hit him with her cane. What a dick.
He just said Mother Teresa would have hit him with her cane. What a dick. He just said Mother Teresa would have hit him with her cane.
I don't think so, actually.
Here's the other thing.
I don't care what he said to him.
It doesn't warrant climbing 12 steps to punch him.
You can't do that.
I don't care what he called him.
Racial words, sure, it's a horrible thing to do.
It doesn't require a guy to leave his fucking professional game.
Especially when you can have that guy thrown out in two seconds.
Climb 12 rows and blast him in the face.
Just tell security, that guy just said something horrific.
I'm not going to repeat it.
And then laugh because your life is probably better than his and you're playing the NBA.
And that guy's about to lose a $112 seat.
Exactly, because he's going to have to go after that.
So anyway, it doesn't matter because this is what you would expect from DeGaran, this
attorney, because in the past, he has represented David Koresh, the Waco cult leader who got
burned down and all that.
He represented that dick?
He represented David Koresh because he had a lot of legal problems, Koresh, leading up
to the whole incident down there.
Also to Texas Senator Kay Bailey Hutchinson.
You do not get any more silver.
Kay Bailey, why is that ring a bell?
She's a senator.
She's a current senator.
So she's a terrible person.
Yeah, that's what I mean.
He has represented a cult leader and a politician and an NBA player.
You don't get any more silver hair than that.
Who climbed 11 rows to blast a fan in the face.
We found it, guys.
This is our 60th episode.
It took 60 episodes.
We found the silverest haired asshole ever i'm saving this index card for the scummy awards this year because
he's a strong contender dick dick hey dick dick de garin who represents mother teresa would have
hit him with her cane that's what i mean that's just that's bullshit and you know it like you
can say look he was saying some things that weren't great
he has a temper he's in the heat of the game and things happen blown out that you can say that but
you can't say i had a cold cocked him to mother theresa would have fucked that guy up no that's
not mother theresa wouldn't have fucked that guy up that's not how that's not how turning the other
cheek works right hitting someone with your cane. Anyway, unreal.
George's lawyer, Maziel, said, quote, it's contrary to what my client says, what my client's brother says, the people who we've talked to that were in the general section and the people sitting right behind the Houston bench.
Nobody even mentioned it up until his lawyer mentioned it today.
It's a shame.
It's something that shouldn't be injected into this because it isn't there.
Everyone knows it. Yeah. Which, yes, exactly. Don't just make up at the last second.
Oh, yeah, he called me the N-word. Right. No, sorry. If he did, fuck that guy. But he didn't.
So clearly not. Now, NBA vice president for operations, Rod Thorne, at the time said,
quote, we've never had anybody go into the stands unless it's a fight among players that spilled
over into the seats. But obviously no one's that big of a fucking moron to go punch a fan on purpose so march 29th 1995 uh george the
victim here files a 4.5 million dollar suit against vernon and the rockets 1.4 of it is for the for
vernon maxwell wow hitting him 3.1 million is the Rockets for not failing to control him, is
what they said.
Like, you should have, and he should sue the Blazers is what he should sue, because it's
their place.
It's their arena.
But he doesn't.
He sues these two.
But the Rockets have 15 people, and he's sitting 11 rows behind their bench.
They got 15 people right there that should have been able to be like, no, no, no, don't
go up there.
Yeah, what are you doing?
Where are you going?
No, no, the game's out here.
It's out here.
Robert Horry, don't run up there with him.
Grab him. Hold on to him. Say,
oh, you can't punch people. Robert, you're about seven inches
taller than him. Grab him by his neck. It was
literally just him standing there one second
and then he just darted up the stairs.
No one knew what he was doing.
And he took them two at a time. It wasn't like he
walked up like, hey man, one at a time.
I'm coming for you. He said, dunk, dunk,
dunk, punch. That was it. Step, step,
step, pop. That was done. Step, step, step, pop. That was done.
Now, on the court, great season for 13.3 points a game, 2.6 rebounds, 4.3 assists in 64 games.
Fine job on the court.
We have some interesting things off the court here at the end.
They end up picking up Clyde Drexler in a trade.
Okay.
And he's fucking pissed about it.
And that is a shooting guard.
That's a shooting guard.
And Clyde Drexler is a Hall of Fame legendary shooting guard.
And they got him as like, if you can get Clyde Drexler a 95 for a title run, you get Clyde
Drexler.
He's only got three years left.
Yeah, that's what I mean.
Yeah, four or five, I think he played.
But I mean, he was really good at this point still, like at the end of his peak.
So smooth.
So smooth.
Yeah.
So they get him.
Vernon's fucking pissed.
He's mad. He's sulking. Yeah. So smooth. So they get him. Vernon's fucking pissed. He's mad.
He's sulking. His playing time gets cut right away because they're playing
Drexler. So they get
into the playoffs. First round of the playoffs.
After the first game, Vernon says his hamstring
is bothering him a little bit. He can't play.
He says, I can't play. My hamstring
is hurting. I'm going to pull myself.
Pull myself. He's like, yeah, hamstring.
Can't do it. So he ends up getting waved by the Rockets, which is, they still had contracts,
and they had to have a big settlement and the whole deal.
He gets waived as it comes out later on that he was faking his hamstring injury.
Of course he was.
Because he was pissed off that Clyde Drexler was there.
Yeah, he's waived by the Rockets.
He's now a free agent.
And he's slimy as fuck.
Absolutely.
It's settled for 500 grand they have to pay him to
get out of the contract. Pretty good deal. If he didn't
fake the hamstring injury, they couldn't have cut him. They would have
had to pay him everything. But the fact that he
faked an injury and got out, there was
kind of a little responsibility everywhere.
So we have an in their own words on
leaving Houston. Oof, boy.
This is dumb as shit. In their
own words, quote, I handled it the wrong
way. I shouldn't have left the way I left.
I got upset because they brought Clyde in
and nobody ever said anything to me about the trade.
I just felt like they disrespected me.
I overreacted like I normally do.
Bad decision.
I wish it wouldn't have happened.
Faking the hammy was the essential.
It was exactly the same as climbing 11 rows to blast a dude.
It's the same shit, but worse,
because you're in the playoffs.
I mean, you're in the playoffs,
and he's a clutch shooter. He's the guy you want him around at the end blast a dude. It's the same shit, but worse, because you're in the playoffs. I mean, you're in the playoffs, and he's a clutch shooter.
He's the guy you want him around at the end of a game.
You've got to spell Drexler for a minute.
You've got to fucking put somebody in that can shoot.
Not to mention, depending on what kind of offense you want to run,
you might want a good shooter at the end of the game.
And if you've got depth at shooting guard, get out of here.
That's amazing.
Especially Maxwell and Drexler.
Those are great.
That's crazy. And how often do you have two shooting guards with X's in their name that are both good?
Very rare.
Cassell was their point guard.
Cassell came in later, too.
Yeah, he came.
At that time, he was there.
Yeah, he was their point guard.
Because Kenny Smith was the point guard.
Right.
He was their point guard, their main guy.
Cassell was a kid then.
They went from Kenny Smith to Sam Cassell.
Yeah, Sam Cassell.
That's fantastic.
One of the uglier people in the history of sports, also.
What a horrible man.
August 30th, 1995.
He's still, you know, not on a team now.
He got waived by Houston.
He is arrested, big shock, for possession of marijuana in Houston.
Oh, no.
He ran a red light in his Porsche and just blew by it.
So they pulled him over and found a bunch of weed in his car.
Or a few baggies, they said, of weed.
But whatever.
So he posts a $1,000 bond and gets out of there on that.
But when you add this to all his other charges, things are getting deep to him here.
Now, September 26, 1995, he is signed by the Philadelphia 76ers for a one-year contract.
I don't remember this.
I don't remember him on the Sixers at all, but he's on the Sixers twice.
Really?
Actually, we're going to see.
He signs for a million dollars for a season.
It's a veteran minimum, what they do, basically.
Has a good season for them. In 96? 96 veteran minimum, what they do, basically. Has a good season for them.
96, 95, 96.
Yeah, 95, 96.
Was he off of New Jersey yet?
I think he was there then.
I don't know.
I'm not positive.
But he played in 75 games, 16.2 points a game, 3.1 rebounds, 4.4 assists.
So, damn fine season for Philly.
They're happy they got him.
Now, let's see. February. We got for Philly. They're happy they got him. Now,
let's see.
February. We got a giggle.
February 96, Vernon is served papers.
He is served court documents
by a process server for
giving a woman named Sheila Reis
herpes, knowingly. Genital
herpes. So now he's got herpes. Knowingly
gave her genital herpes. He's probably got more
than that. He's sticking his dick in everything he can find at the bait shop that has three jello shots in it. So now he's got herpes. Knowingly gave her genital herpes. He's probably got more than that. He's sticking his dick in everything you can find at the
bait shop that has three jello shots in it.
So who knows?
He's served, but he does not appear in court.
Because he does not appear, there is a default
judgment of $592,000
against him.
Holy shit. He doesn't respond at all to it.
He just ignores it, basically. But
he ends up fighting it, saying that it was
an improper serve on him.
If you have a lawyer, you can fight anything on this.
He's got a dick back there.
He's got a dick.
He gets a retrial on this for improper service against him basically, which will take place a little bit later.
Now on March 18th of 96, Vernon and the Rockets settle with George, the fan he punched.
He gets around $100,000, the guy.
He wants $4. whatever million.
He gets $100,000.
He got $100,000 for getting punched in the face.
I don't know that I'm going to take a punch for $100,000.
I'll let you punch me right now.
Really?
For $10,000.
For $100,000?
I don't care.
I've been punched a lot.
I don't give a shit.
Punch me.
I don't know.
I want to take one from a 6'5 Vernon Maxwell.
Chance of dislocating the orbital socket or
probably i'll take it for a hundred grand come on if you're out there buddy yeah if you hit him in
the jaw if you're out there if you still have a hundred grand left which i know factually that
you do not if you gather one come on down to phoenix punch me in the face and i'll take your
hundred grand i'll be very happy everyone's thrilled no problem and that goes for anyone
out there it's a standing offer. Crime and sports movement
here. Anyone would like to punch me in the
face. $100,000 on the table. You can
punch me. Anybody. I don't care.
Knock yourself out. Knock me out.
Just one punch. Yeah, one punch. I'm not an asshole here.
One punch. If you really want to sock
me like that son of a bitch with those fucking in their
own words. I hate that guy. Go over here and
punch me. Knock yourself out. I don't care.
So,
July 11th of
96 for some reason he's released by the 76ers why wouldn't you want this guy hanging around your
club he got some young herpes got some young players jesus christ it's covered in it so uh
august 29th 96 he signed by san antonio again his old team that he was drafted on traded for
on draft day i remember this though yeah i do too he was drafted on, traded for on draft day.
I think I remember this, though.
Yeah, I do, too.
He was on that team.
It was in the beginning of Popovich being there and all that kind of deal.
Now, November 14th, 1996.
I know this because of records, the date on this, because there's an interesting thing.
Remember Dominique, Myra Jenkins' son that he had with?
Okay.
Maxwell.
First of all, Maxwell is not seeing him very often at all.
He didn't meet him until six years and he's been a complete piece of shit to this kid.
Okay.
Now, Maxwell picks up Dominique and he's also got Vernon Jr., his son, and he's taking them to his house in Gainesville.
Here's a kid that was born after you and named exactly this, named my name, proving to you
how little I give a fuck about you.
Yeah, don't give a fuck.
Dominique was born second.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, Vernon Jr. was first in 86.
Dominique was 89.
So that would have been awful.
Yeah, I don't care about that.
The worst.
You're not a junior.
Fuck you.
So he's taking them to their house in Gainesville.
And they make a stop along the way.
Ice cream, right?
They're going to stop for ice cream.
We'll stop at the toy store.
Bubblegum shop.
A couple of kids.
Yeah, a toy store.
You guys want some candy?
Hey, let's rent some movies.
Get a Pez.
We'll rent movies.
We'll get popcorn and candy.
You guys can go fucking crazy running around my house.
You guys seen Home Alone?
It's crazy.
Nope.
He stops at a different type of establishment.
He stops at a medical place to get a blood test for Dominique because he doesn't-
Get the fuck out of here.
This is seven years.
The kid's seven years old.
I'm going to borrow the kid and go spend some quality time at the clinic, making sure he's
mine.
Not only that, not only does he do that, he gives the kid $40 and tells him not to tell
his mother that he's here.
Here's 40 bucks.
He literally tried to bribe a seven year old.
Now, first of all, the mother would go, where the fuck do you get $40 at seven?
So then you'd have to go, well, dad gave it to me because he didn't want me to tell you
that this incision is in my arm, this puncture is in my arm.
That's the other thing.
Kid's going home with a bandaid on his fucking back.
Dad didn't want me to tell you about this blue ribbon around my arm.
Ridiculous.
I had a cookie, though, so that's good.
It's fucking insane, man.
Dad gave it to me to prove that he's really my dad.
What does that mean?
What does that mean?
Oh, you know, we went and actually had blood work done. Yeah, with a needle. To prove that he's really my dad. What does that mean? Oh, you know, we went and actually had blood work done to prove that he's my dad.
Wow.
Can you get, how shitty is that, man?
So Myra Jenkins, the mother of this kid, is pissed.
Yeah.
She says, quote, that was the last straw.
After that, I wouldn't agree to unsupervised visits.
Well, no shit, he's sticking needles in the kid.
Good Christ.
This is so sad. That's awesome. Jenkins, this is so sad, man. Well, no shit. He's sticking needles in the kid. Good Christ. This is so sad.
That's awesome.
Jenkins, this is so sad, man.
This broke my heart.
Jenkins used to send postcards from other places to her son Dominique signing them.
Oh, Jesus.
Dad.
So the kid would think that the father gave a shit about him.
That is so shitty.
How sad is that?
That is the saddest fucking thing
i've ever heard like and he would be like oh good god i'm just i'm isn't that sick doesn't that make
you a puddle of shit right now that is so terrible i didn't meet my dad till i was 28 yeah and if my
mom had done that and then told me about it later i think i would i think i would fucking i'd just
cry that's the saddest thing I've ever heard.
That is so horrible.
I think I'd rather him not give a shit.
No.
Yeah.
Than do that.
That's so bad.
Oh, man.
But I mean, she's trying.
But that's how much she loves her kid.
Yeah, she's trying.
And she does.
She sticks up for this kid a lot.
God, Jesus.
Now, on the court – that's terrible.
On the court, 96-97 for the Spurs.
He's still playing.
This is – I mean, usually the crime – this much crime comes when they're done.
He's still fucking playing. He's still playing. Usually this much crime comes when they're done. He's still fucking playing.
Still playing.
He's at 72 games, 12.9 points a game.
Good God, he's playing the whole season.
Playing all season. 2.2 rebounds,
2.1 assists, 1.2 steals. Having a fine
year. He just keeps
plugging along. No problem.
1997. Oh God, this is great too.
Vernon has a history
of faking injuries apparently.
He's a talented, talented injury faker.
97, Maxwell fakes injuries multiple times to not have to go play in Miami or Orlando
because they are in the state of Florida where he owes child support.
Where there is a warrant out for his arrest for failure to pay child support.
So he fakes injuries to not have to go there.
I've got to stay out of those games in Florida.
Wow.
Hilarious.
Unreal.
That's unbelievable.
This, by the way, is not for Dominique, and this is not for his wife.
This is for another kid.
Another kid.
This is a random kid that he owes.
He settles for $51,000 at this point for this one.
He's got another one.
This will keep coming up.
Keep it out of Orlando and Miami.
Keep? I can't go there.
I got warrants. Like, what?
You're playing, but what is wrong with you?
Settle that shit, dude. Did I kill somebody?
Christ. I got a bad hammy.
I got a bad tricep.
I got shoulder spasms. I'm just going to stay home.
Can't go. So he's got a history of this shit.
This is twice in two years.
Hilarious. And if you think this is the very first time that happened, we are sadly mistaken.
No, no, no.
He's a guy.
Because that shit happens all the time.
I guarantee it.
He's a guy that just feels a little pissy about something.
Like, I feel slighted.
They disrespected me, so I'm going to sit down and just fucking, I'm not playing.
So, shockingly enough, July 1st, 1970 is released by San Antonio.
Why wouldn't they want this guy? Because they got
four games. Jesus Christ.
They're like, we only get him for
78 games. That
Florida swing is rough. God forbid
if any, either, if we all make it into the finals
and it's like us and Orlando, he's just gone.
He's not coming. Well, that's the East and
West, right? Yes. Yeah.
Lucky him. The finals.
They could play the finals. They could play in the finals.
If they were in the finals, he was out.
So January 5th.
Unreal.
So he sits for about six months without a team.
Sits on his ass 98.
Because he can't go to Florida.
No, and they're all fucking leery of him.
So he must have settled it because on January 5th, 98, he signs a 10-day contract with the Orlando Magic.
So he goes to Florida, which for him, hometown guy, and for them, 97 still, you know, that gets people in the seats.
He's a Florida guy.
They like him, whatever.
Now, it's the first of two 10-day contracts.
I was just about to say, this is the end of his career because I don't even remember him in Orlando.
A 10-day contract is basically a tryout in the NBA.
They bring you in and, you know.
They run practice drills with you
for 10 days to see if you're worth a fuck.
So they sign him to two. They're like, maybe.
Take a look at him again. No, I don't think so.
So they decide they don't want him.
Now, February 2nd, he is
signed to a 10-day contract with the Charlotte Hornets.
So he's bouncing around, trying to find a team.
On February 13th, he signs
a contract for the rest of the season with the Hornets.
What?
The Hornets take him on. Get the fuck out of Charlotte.
Don't give my Curry and my fucking Muggsy Bogues any fucking herpes.
Wear your shower shoes, Muggsy.
No, covered.
Poor Muggsy.
That's why he had to retire.
He's a small man.
His whole body was one big lesion.
He had to leave.
One five-foot-three herpes.
That's it, man.
One big sore.
It was very sad to watch.
Sad to watch him deteriorate, really.
You know what I mean? Somebody bump into him and he'd just crumble to the floor. Not great. Oh, it, man. One big sore. It was very sad to watch. Sad to watch him deteriorate, really. You know what I mean?
Somebody bump into him and he'd just crumble to the floor.
Not great.
Oh, it stings.
Oh, it stings.
So now early 90s, or I'm sorry, late 97 when he was missing, not in a team, there was a
reason why he wasn't on a team also, because he wasn't available for a couple of months
because, Jesus Christ almighty.
Because he had an outbreak?
No, no, no.
He wishes he had an outbreak, but he is in jail for 90 days for weed.
That marijuana possession back then, that's what he's being sentenced for now.
90 days for it?
90 days in jail for that.
I think they're trying to make an example out of him because he's done nothing but fuck up since then.
Now, while serving jail for the marijuana, his son Dominique writes him a letter in jail, a typewritten letter asking when they can basically meet up.
When can we spend – I want to see you.
You're my dad.
When's visiting hours?
When can I see you basically?
When are you going to come see me?
I don't think he knows his dad's in jail.
Now, Maxwell apparently tried to call collect from jail.
They found out later, but no one was there to pick up the phone.
So they never got the call, and so Jenkins tried to reach him,
tried to call him repeatedly, and he would
never return calls again. So he felt
guilty for a minute. He got that letter and actually
said, shit, I'm a dick.
Yeah, and he's sitting, he's not hanging out with his boys,
he's not in the bar, he's not drunk, he's not
looking at blonde tits. He's actually like,
fuck, maybe I should make this right, and he tries
and then nobody answered, and he's like, ah, fuck that kid make this right. And he tries and then nobody answered. And he's like, fuck that kid.
I'm moving on.
Never mind.
His heart was pounding as it was ringing and ringing.
Then it goes to the answering machine and he just hangs up.
Fucking thank God.
Done.
Yeah.
I did it.
I did my part.
I told him I called.
I called.
Now on August 25th, 1998, Vernon files for bankruptcy.
There's a reason why he files for bankruptcy.
He's trying to be clever here.
He claims that a Houston accountant named Tracy DaCosta stole more than $500,000 from him and
fled to Mexico. That is the deal here. But his two biggest people that he owes debts to
are a Ferrari dealer and another high-end car dealer in Philly. So he's got a real...
There's a story. I couldn't confirm the truth of it, but there's a story from about 95, 96 that he had a Lotus, which is a very expensive car.
He had a Lotus, and somebody tapped into his rear end of his Lotus, and she tried to get him out of the car, and they wouldn't get out of the car.
So he took his dick out and pressed it against the window.
That I recall.
That's a very famous story, but I could not confirm it.
So I'm telling it now, but I'm saying I don't know if it's true.
That's a rumor, but I can't say if this happened on this day.
No, I won't.
Look at these herpes.
Yeah, check out my ball bag.
I'm going to get herpes on your window.
Now what?
Now what?
Now you got herpes on your window.
Now you got ooze all over the place.
You get drive-through food you bring it in.
There's going to be herpes all over.
It's going to pass through the herpes zone.
Now what, motherfucker?
Yeah.
Pass through the herpes zone.
You're going to have Big Mac with herpes.
So yeah, motherfucker? Yeah. Pass through the herpes zone. You're going to have Big Mac with herpes. So, yeah, he claims bankruptcy.
That's on the 25th because on the 26th he is ordered by a judge to pay Sheila Reyes $592,000 for the herpes.
Yeah.
So he claims he can't pay.
He just claimed bankruptcy.
How can I pay?
I have no money, which everyone thinks is completely full of fucking shit.
Yeah.
Like, how could it not be full of shit?
Honestly, like, what are we what are we talking about here?
Like, you know what I mean?
He's got herpes, though.
That's the fucking craziest thing to me, though.
That's not.
I would expect that, though.
What do you mean?
He's out fucking everybody.
I just don't want my heroes to have STDs.
Are you kidding me? All of these guys have STDs. Are you kidding me?
All of these guys have STDs.
He has been fucking unprotected, obviously.
He's got kids popping out everywhere.
And he's doing it knowingly, too.
Giving it to them knowingly.
Giving it.
He doesn't give a shit.
He knows he's got it, and he's still banging away.
That's what they said, knowingly.
He's just, no, no, you don't need a condom with me.
I'm great.
The scariest part is he could have given George herpes.
Yeah.
Blast him in the face.
Oh, he could have given anybody herpes. blast him in the face. Oh, he could have given anybody herpes.
He's a minefield, this guy right now.
He's a walking powder keg.
He's a terrible, terrible human being.
He is.
He's a complete mess.
He's feeling like shit, and he's got the herpes.
He's got to pay almost $600,000 that he says he doesn't have, and Ferrari dealers are saying to him he owes his fucking money.
Slinging dicks allegedly on car windows.
Yeah, and his decorating style
isn't really that great because he wears like a burnt
gold suit when he goes out.
You know what I mean? So he goes out to a nightclub
and he sits, they put him in a VIP section and he's
sitting there in his burnt gold suit
and he's just sitting there and then out of nowhere
out of nowhere
there's a cloud of smoke and it's
Dexter Manley interior decorator
from New York City
and he says
how is it you come to arrive here
what are you doing
is that gold
that's tacky
you tacky
you got herpes
I was going to say
you're looking pretty good
but I don't think so now you got the herpes and you say you can't even pay me're looking pretty good, but I don't think so now.
You got the herpes.
And you say you can't even pay me if you give it to me?
I don't think so now.
Bake shop?
You didn't know this was the gay bar?
This is the gay bar.
Do you understand?
We do jello shots.
That's so we can get gross together.
That's what we do.
That's so we can get straight guys to get into it.
That's how it works.
That's how we do this.
So, Mr. Milk Dud.
I'm never having another jello shot. Let do this. So, Mr. Milk Dud. I'm never having another Jell-O shot.
Let me tell you something, Mr. Milk Dud.
I think you text your family.
And then poof, in a cloud of glitter, he's gone.
And Maxwell's like, did I just see that shit?
And he just has another drink and doesn't care.
Give me a Jell-O shot.
Give me a Jell-O shot.
Fuck it.
So, on the court, 1997, 1998, plays in 42 games.
He is a little less on the court 1997 1998 plays in 42 games he is a little less on the court now 6.9 points 1.4 rebounds 1.2 assists so over he's gone down it's almost cba time it's almost cba well you
can't actually there's over we'll get into that we'll get into that you're ahead of the story
all right now at this point michael j, this is when he was winning championships with the Bulls.
They beat the – in 98, they beat the Jazz in the finals.
Jordan is talking a bunch of shit, saying the Rockets only won in 94 and 95 because I was playing baseball.
That's the only fucking reason they won.
Wow.
That would have been my shit if it wasn't for them.
So later on, Vernon responds to this.
First of all, he's mad from the minute he hears this shit.
But we get a response for it in 2015 about this whole thing.
Saying shit through his eyebrows.
You know it.
You know he's glaring.
He's so fucking pissed.
He hates Jordan.
He says, in their own words, quote, I wanted to fight him.
Really?
Michael Jordan goes around telling everybody we would have never won two championships
if he wouldn't have went and tried to play baseball.
I just say, Google the times we played them.
They couldn't beat us. It was like we couldn't beat
Seattle. If we could have gotten past Seattle,
we would have knocked Chicago off. We were a team
they couldn't match up for. Just Google it
and the numbers don't lie. Fuck you,
Michael Jordan. Google it. I wanted to fight
him, really. Fuck this shit. Just Google it.
It's so weird having one of our guys saying
Google it. Isn't it?
These people are like, I feel like they're from another time, another place. They shouldn't be telling people to Google things. It's so weird having one of our guys saying Google it. Isn't it? These people are like, I feel like they're from another time, another place.
Like they shouldn't be telling people to Google things.
It's just wrong.
Ruins my whole image of this person here.
So why wouldn't you want Vernon Maxwell on your team right now?
I can't imagine.
I mean.
Sacramento Kings can't think of a reason either because they signed him January of 99.
Idiots.
They signed him.
They're like, let's have this year.
Now 98, 99. You know, he plays a little there.
Half the season, he plays in 46 games, 10.7 points, 1.8 rebounds, 1.7 assists.
So not terrible for a role player either.
He's adding things.
August 3rd, 99.
A ninth man.
A ninth man.
He's an eighth man.
He's released by Sacramento.
August 9th, he's signed by the Seattle Supersonics.
And they signed him to a deal.
I don't know what the fuck they were thinking because everyone else has signed him to 10 games one year.
If you look at his contracts, they're like league minimum, league minimum.
He is signed for three years.
Three years.
Why?
You don't need to sign him for three years.
At $5 million per.
Did they have anybody?
Is that what it is?
There's just no shooting guards in the league?
In the mid-'90s, they were good with Kemp and Payton and all those guys.
Schrempf and then Massey.
They were tough, those guys.
It was a great team.
But, I mean, this is a mess.
Now, at this point, he has been making child support payments to Myra Jenkins for Dominique in the amount of $2,700 a month.
Dominique in the amount of $2,700 a month.
When he signs this contract, though, she puts in and has the child support raised due to his more income to $5,043 a month.
Wow.
Which is a shitload of money for one kid.
That's a lot of money for one fucking kid.
That's a whole lot.
That's a lot.
Now, December 1999, I don't know what took this so fucking long, but Rasharita, long
suffering Rasharita, finally divorces Vernon.
Good God.
Finally.
Talking about eight years.
Finally.
Yeah, it's insane.
Finally, she gets their home that was purchased for $348,000 in Atlanta, which was a lot in the 90s.
His Porsche, his Range Rover, and access to his bank accounts.
Oh, he got fucked.
He got railed.
But he doesn't even hire a lawyer.
He doesn't defend it.
He just says whatever.
She deserves it.
Well, Jesus Christ.
They understand each other.
That's why.
No, we haven't understanding him and me.
She lets me be me.
Also, too, if you get in court and then get him, yeah, I've had restraining orders against him.
He pushed me down while I was pregnant.
He fucked this girl.
Had a broken wrist.
There's two people he's paying child support for.
down while I was pregnant. He fucked this girl. Had a broken wrist?
There's two people he's paying child support for. Another woman just got $600,000
for him for giving her herpes
even though he's bankrupt because he's been
spending all her money on fucking booze and peanut and fish.
People are on herpes home to me. Yeah, from other
people. Jesus Christ.
They would still live
together, though. They stay living
together for about two and a half more years.
Yeah, because he's got to have visitors
of his fucking money. He just stays.
They divorce, but he just stays.
She's got all his cash.
He has no car to leave.
That's true. It's a good point. On the court
in Seattle, plays for 47 games,
10.9 points a game, 1.7
rebounds, 1.6 assists. So again, decent
bench guy. But there's some drama there.
March 29, 2000,
Vernon and Gary Paytonton if you remember the
great guard gary payton i believe a hall of famer the glove yeah uh great defender and great
everything one of the best shit talkers in the history of the worst actor that ever happened
oh yeah that's terrible eddie oh yeah no that's no good that's so bad you don't want any of that
he's so bad maxwell and gary payton are fin both of them, for a locker room brawl involving them
that injured two teammates.
They hurt other people.
This is some WWE shit.
Payton grabbed a chair.
Oh, my God.
To swing at Maxwell.
So Maxwell grabbed his favorite weapon, a dumbbell.
Oh, a dumbbell.
No, not the shotgun.
He left the shotgun.
The shotgun's in the car.
He'll go out and get the shotgun once he hits him with the dumbbell.
He grabbed a fucking dumbbell to hit Gary Payton.
He grabs a dumbbell.
Payton grabs a chair.
They go at each other.
And Horace Grant, of all people, gets in the middle to try to break it up and gets injured by them.
Horace Grant played there?
Horace Grant played there.
I don't remember that.
He only played there for a little while longer.
And then here he's going to go somewhere else.
But, yeah, he gets injured by getting hit with a chair and a dumbbell while they were trying to hit each other, basically.
So, poor Horace Grant.
It didn't hurt his eyes because he had goggles on.
Yeah, at least he wasn't poked in the eye.
Now, September 5th, 2000, a warrant is issued for Vernon in Charlotte, North Carolina,
where a woman named Heidi Hayden told police that he punched and kicked her several times while he was in her home.
He's wanted for assault.
So now he's got an assault warrant out there in North Carolina.
Heidi Hayden.
Heidi Hayden.
That is his fucking, you know she has blue eyes, blonde hair, and she was rubbing her
tits.
He likes blonde tits.
She was rubbing those tits.
She had jello shots lined up on the thing.
It was all ready, man.
Sounds like a porn star, Heidi Hayden.
It does.
It does.
Now, September 20th, 2000, it's better than, what was it, Hilda St. James or whatever it was.
Hilda something.
What was her name?
Hilda St. Louis.
Hilda St. Louis.
That was her name.
Thank you.
Hilda St. Louis.
Tommy Kane last week.
Almost saved a woman's life, Hilda St. Louis.
Almost.
Almost.
And also, too, just the worst actress in the history of pornography and a fine, up-going
Trinidadian church lady.
She's all things to all people, Hilda St. George.
What a terrible bodyguard.
Jesus.
September 20, 2000.
He's part of a ridiculous, asinine four-team trade for a bunch of some decent players,
a bunch of over-the-hill guys, and a bunch of garbage, basically.
In these players, in this deal, Luke Longley goes from the Suns to the Knicks.
Oh, that's right.
He did play here.
I was like, oh, great.
At the end of it all.
I saw, too.
Well, no, they picked him up as a free agent, like a big free agent after Chicago was run.
Right.
It was done.
It was terrible.
It was done.
Because he was garbage.
He wasn't the catalyst of that team.
He wasn't the reason.
He was just tossing rebounds back to fucking Dennis Rodman.
And then when I saw the Suns traded him, I was like, thank God we're rid of this guy.
Who'd they trade him to?
Fuck.
Perfect.
Fuck my other team.
Never mind.
Fuck this shit.
So also, ridiculous.
The NBA hates James.
The NBA hates me.
Does not want me to be a fan at all.
Hilarious.
How brutal was that Knicks-Suns fucking brawl for you then?
I loved it.
It was great.
It was a Greg Anthony punching Kevin Johnson.
I loved them both.
I was like, this is hilarious.
That was Greg Anthony in street clothes.
I think that started with Charles Oakley, too.
Probably.
I think so.
Or Mason.
Most things started with one of those two.
It was Mason, Oakley, and Barkley.
You know that started the whole thing.
That's starting shit.
Actually, I feel like it was Dan Marley.
Probably.
I think Marley had something to do with it. I think if they had Ainge at that. Didn't they have Ainge at that point, too? That's exactly shit. Actually, I feel like it was Dan Marley. Probably. I think Marley had something to do with it.
I think if they had Ainge at that, didn't they have Ainge at that point too?
That's exactly what it was.
Ainge is a prick and everyone hates Ainge.
I want to just lean right on that.
I think that's what it was.
I'll have to look that up when I get home.
But yeah, definitely.
Now, also in this deal, Glenn Rice, who we know of for allegedly fucking Sarah Palin in college.
We know that.
My favorite joke about that was Glenn Rice was always good for drilling a three.
That's pretty good.
That's pretty great.
Yeah, that's not bad.
Okay, fine.
That's as good an internet joke as you get.
That's okay.
Also, Horace Grant is in the trade.
He's getting away from these fucking maniacs.
Chuck Person also.
Get out of here.
Chuck Person and Patrick Ewing.
This was Patrick Ewing leaving the Knicks and going to Seattle for the very tail end of his career.
Why don't I remember that?
That was sad to watch.
I hated that because I loved Ewing.
Now Vernon ends up with the Knicks somehow in this whole mess.
I don't know who goes where.
I know Ewing ends up in Seattle.
He ends up on the Knicks.
He is waived by the Knicks two weeks later.
They don't want him.
They're like, what do we need this asshole for?
They traded all that shit away to get him and then just fucking waive him.
Yeah, well,
they were dumping salary
for Ewing
and it was a salary dump
for one team
and guys who,
you know,
had expiring contracts.
The NBA does most of their shit
based on what's garbage.
Now, in 2000,
Vernon and Rasharita,
who were recently divorced,
they have another daughter.
What the fuck?
That's more kids.
He has herpes.
Stop putting his dick inside you. They have an understanding, Jimmy. Don't you know that? We have another daughter. What the fuck? That's more kids. He has herpes. Stop putting his dick inside you.
They have an understanding, Jimmy.
Don't you know that?
We have an under...
That just...
She's not...
We have an understanding means we both burn when we pee.
That's what that means.
And we're fine with that.
We're fine with that 100%.
Because, quote, she gives me my freedom.
That's why we're still together.
Other girl's too bossy.
That's all.
Too much pressure, man.
She gives me my freedom.
She trusts me because she knows that I have scabs on my dick.
That's all it is.
Nobody will possibly put that in their mouth.
She lets me run with my thing.
She's like, yo, man, you got the herpes?
That's okay.
Spread it around.
Give it to me.
You know what?
We're all friends here.
I understand you, Vernon.
Unbelievable.
Sharing is caring.
Since the fourth grade.
Sharing is caring.
So they have a daughter.
Lucky them. Holy them. Another kid.
So now he has six,
seven, too many.
Who the fuck knows how many he's got.
I lost count at this point. Oh, God, Jesus.
So October 28, 2000,
he signs as a free agent with the 76ers.
People still want this guy for some reason.
December 22, he's only there
a couple months. He's waived by the 76ers.
So they didn't really want him that much February 28th
2001 he's signed by Dallas
what?
we need this guy
all I can think of is this was
the point when Dallas was trying to get people to
pay attention to them this is when they
actually offered anyone who would do
it two different
things they would give you $100,000
if you either legally changed your name to Dallas Maverick,
literally, legally changed it to Dallas Maverick, or got the Dallas Maverick logo tattooed visibly
somewhere on your body.
Oh, that hat on the M.
Yes.
Oh, so ugly.
Tattooed visibly on your body, which they've switched the logo now, so you'd be ready with
that logo. But that was the deal. So they were trying. Maybe they were like, well, which they've switched the logo now, so you'd be ready with that logo.
But that was the deal.
So they were trying.
Maybe they were like, well, people like him in Houston.
He won two titles.
People would do that shit for a laugh for 100 grand.
They would do it for a couple of retweets.
Are you kidding me?
Never mind 100 grand.
I've got a thing.
I'll put it on Instagram.
No, like 112 likes, bro.
It's fucking worth it.
Douchebag.
Fucks.
Jesus Christ.
If you were going to change your name to Dallas Maverick, you can change it again. I'd fucking worth it douchebag fucks jesus christ to change your name to dallas maverick
you can change it again i'd fucking do it i'd do that just to be like yeah sure i'd do that in a
second you had to keep it for a year whatever who cares i'm in okay you don't have to call
none of my friends are gonna call me dallas maverick they'll say that on my license and
i'll laugh and be like they gave me a hundred bucks give me a hundred thousand bucks can you
believe that shit who cares i had to pay taxes on it, but whatever.
Great story. It was like $60,000
or whatever. Great.
2000-2001,
43 games that year. Not a great
season. It's about done for
Vernon here. 4.7 points a game,
1.5 rebounds, 1.1 steals.
Is he the only person
in NBA history that
played for all teams in Texas?xas that's i don't
know that's a good i never thought about that that's a real possibility i never thought about
that rockets spurs mavericks yeah every one of them galveston have a team i don't know i'm not
sure here jesus so that's crazy that is crazy so career totals for him he played in 855 games, 12.8 points a game, 2.6 rebounds, 3.4 assists, 1.1 steals.
So goddamn fine, half decent, never made an all-star team, was never that terrific, but he was on the cusp.
There's just so many good shooting guards.
Still got a ring.
Yeah, if you're competing with Clyde Drexler to be an all-star, you're not going to be an all-star, basically.
Fucking all-star team if you got a ring.
Yeah, he's got two rings.
He's got two.
He's got two.
He didn't play in the finals.
He got shit-canned in 95 when he did his hamstring thing, but he's still got a ring. I don't give a shit. He's got two. He's got two. He didn't play in the finals. He got shit-canned in 95 when he did his hamstring thing.
But he's still got a ring. And that 94
ring, he was a big part of that. He was the one, yeah.
He can say he earned that one. Now,
2001-2002, after this,
offers come for him to play overseas.
Why not? If you want this guy
overseas, he's a famous guy, an NBA guy.
No warrants there. Nope. But
he cannot get a visa due to his extensive criminal record.
He can't get into Lithuania if he tries.
Fuck getting into Lithuania.
He can't get out of the U.S.
No.
No one wants him in.
That's why.
He can leave, but no one will take him.
That's awesome.
Unreal.
So October 2002, police are called to Vernon's house in Georgia.
It's Alpharetta.
This is the one that his wife got from him in the divorce, but they still all live together.
Still living there.
Still living there in October 2002.
Police are called.
This will change soon.
Let's get an eviction notice.
Oh, boy.
They're called after he, oh my God, he is charged with assault after having a physical
fight with Vernon Jr.
Oh my God.
Over what, you may ask?
Did Vernon take his Porsche out and just wrap it around a tree?
No.
It was over the amount of push-ups that Vernon Jr. was doing.
What?
Apparently not enough push-ups.
That creates a physical altercation.
Motherfucker, I said push-up!
I will get herpes all over you.
This is like so Sally McNeil.
I was praying that he was playing like NBA Live or something
and he traded Vernon off the team.
Yeah, he's like, man, fuck him.
I don't need you.
Traded him for fucking Clyde Drexler.
This reminds me of episode eight, Sally McNeil,
or episode seven, whatever it is. Eight, I think. Sally McNe reminds me of Episode 8, Sally McNeil, or Episode 7, whatever it is.
8, I think.
Sally McNeil, the Ballad of Sally McNeil.
This is like when her husband beat her up because her shoulders were not defined enough.
Remember that?
Your shoulders are not defined enough.
I need to punch you in the face.
That's what happened here.
Unbelievable.
You're not doing your push-ups.
So, such a bad fight.
The police have to be called, and he's arrested and charged for assault.
Also, when they get there, he has weed on him, too, so they charge him for possession of marijuana.
Rasherita, at this point, forces Vernon out of the house and gets a restraining order against him.
Good.
She sells the house and cleans out his bank accounts, too.
So he crossed the line.
So much for an understanding.
It is over.
Give her herpes, impregnate other women, fucking go out and make a fool of her in public.
Shove her down.
Don't you fuck with Vernon Jr. and his push-ups, goddammit.
His push-ups are fine.
He's got a triangle push-up.
God, that's right.
Now, the agent for him, this guy named Manley, said, quote, Jesus Christ.
They basically said, what the hell is wrong with Vernon?
A reporter asked him.
He said, quote, I don't know if there are any substance abuse issues.
You think?
Wow.
I bet I do.
The transition from the NBA to civilian life is difficult for a lot of athletes.
Vernon was always high strung, which made him a valuable and useful guy in the NBA world.
In ordinary life, that's something that can get to you.
No shit, asshole.
Yeah, you can't be a crazy person that's willing to bound up 12 steps
and punch someone every time you hear, hey, good game.
Exactly.
It's not okay.
So this is a disaster so far.
Let's recap for one second here, okay?
He fights over nothing.
Fights over nothing.
Nothing.
He's impregnated all sorts of women, at least three that we know of, and possibly more.
I would assume more.
He owes child support all over the place, first of all.
He's spreading herpes to anybody he can.
He's hit Carl Herrera.
He's hurt Horace Grant while trying to attack Gary Payton with a fucking dumbbell.
His wife has been tormented, tortured.
She's got an understanding.
He's out in the clubs rubbing on
blonde chicks in the paper. Maybe rubbing dicks on
windows. Rubbing dicks on windows. Waving
guns in parking lots. I feel
bad for all these people. God damn it.
I feel bad. Good God,
what a life. All these people, but not
nearly. Get out of here.
One of these has to be a woman.
As bad as I feel for Vernon
Maxwell. Oh, poor guy.
A storeroom tech sits so deck in Ladies Island, South Carolina.
And Vernon Maxwell, an insurance agent for Allstate in Newburgh, New York, which is like right across the river from where I'm from.
It's the murder capital of New York State, actually.
It is.
It's worse.
More murder there than anywhere else in the state.
This guy's selling life insurance there.
People are going to fucking need it.
Let me tell you something.
But they can't afford to get it either good hands vernon maxwell marketing and advertising guy with dpmg in tampa florida yeah vernon maxwell
self-employed salesman and management consultant which means he has no fucking job self-employed
salesman did you say dpmg that might be him dick pressed him. Dick pressed against my glass. Dick pressed against my glass productions.
That's great.
That could be him.
That's possible.
I hope it is.
That is possible.
Now, he's, like I said, a self-employed bullshit artist in Sydney, Australia.
Vernon Antonio Maxwell.
Oh, shit.
Operations manager at Presso Hotel in Italy.
He's just this Italian guy.
That may be Vernon Maxwell Jr., and he just moved out of the country.
And finally, the one where you're really going to get confused.
Vernon Maxwell, former NFL linebacker from 1983 to 1989.
What?
He's an ASU, Arizona State University alum, and he played for the Colts, Lions, and Seahawks.
And he is also currently a member of the players that are suing the NFL in the concussion lawsuit, actually, also.
Did he live in Seattle when Vernon was there?
That is possible.
Vernon has some other shit going on in Seattle.
Stay tuned for one second here.
Jesus Christ.
Now, January 2003, Vernon confronts Rash Arita in the parking lot of Vernon Jr.'s private school.
Oh, God.
He is upset with his academic performance.
He needs another house kicking.
This fucking guy is on top of this shit.
You do your push-ups, you get straight A's.
That's a hell of a dad.
He's an old school dad.
God damn it.
Now, he hasn't accepted he's never there and he's spreading herpes to everyone that he
can reach.
He has an argument with Rasharita and tries to snatch the Range Rover that she got in
the divorce, tries to snatch the keys away from her, saying that he's going to sell it
and he says that she should appreciate it because he's been supporting her financially which is a court order court order
i mean you're not doing it out of the goodness of your heart so shocker he's arrested should i say
to my wife though not after you she has a restraining order against you that's the difference
he's arrested for violating a restraining order at that point, clearly, because he did.
Now, early 2004, good Lord, this is a bad one, too.
It's in Marietta, Georgia.
Vernon is arrested.
He is with a female friend.
He is with a woman named Belinda Bean, B-E-I-N-E, Bean.
I think that is how you say that in the last name.
He apparently took her from somewhere else against her will to her home and locked her inside. That is kidnapping. That is how you say that in the last name. He apparently took her from somewhere else against her will to her home and locked her inside.
That is kidnapping.
That is kidnapping.
When she tried to escape, he beat her.
And assault.
Even struck her with a TV tray.
Oh, my God.
Like I said, he thinks he's a WWE guy. He didn't have a dumbbell handy, and there was no glass to press his dick against, so he just beat her with a TV tray.
Bruising all over her, all over her back.
He's arrested for kidnapping and aggravated assault, which is not terrific.
When arrested, they asked him his name and he told the officer, Kenneth Shaw.
Fucking asshole.
So he doesn't even admit who he is.
Dickhead.
So he goes to jail, but there's more pressing matters in another state.
Because he is pretty much immediately extradited to Gainesville, Florida.
OK.
Because he owes a fuckload of child support.
Just a fuckload.
April 15th, he spends five days in jail for failure to pay child support for Dominique, who is 15 at this moment.
Records show that he hasn't paid the $5,043 child support per month since May of 2001.
Oh, no.
Three years.
He was able to get his bail reduced from $108,000 to $20,000 to try to get out.
Jenkins, Myra Jenkins, the mother of Dominique, said, quote,
he's just a poor excuse for a human being.
He's a poor excuse for a man.
No man should run from his responsibilities.
If he were a garbage man, I'd be fighting for this the same way.
God damn it. She's not wrong. Vernon has an answer, though, for this. He does. This
is logic here. He says, what are you going to do in their own words on this in their
own words? Quote, I had to take care of my wife and four kids. That was the first thing
I had to worry about. I didn't have enough money to take care of everyone else. In other
words, other kids that I fucking have. Jesus Christ, I don't have money to take care of everyone else. In other words, other kids that I fucking have. Jesus Christ.
I don't have money to take care of everything that I make.
No.
What are you going to do?
Good God.
Do you take care of everything that you do?
You get a dog.
You don't take care of all the dogs you get, right?
Some dogs you feed.
Some dogs, they die on the yard.
That's what happens.
Sometimes they got to wait their turn.
They die in the yard, man.
That's it.
I don't know.
Shit.
Sometimes you lock them in your cage and they forget they're there.
It happens.
So Myra Jenkins, though, says about him, about him she says quote he was a great basketball player you can't take that away from
him but that doesn't make him a great person that doesn't make him a great father which should be
our motto yeah that should be the crime and sports motto if we had a if we had like a you know a what
are those called mission statement yeah if we had a crest that would be on it yeah now maxwell's
lawyer another asshole steven turnage said quote ver Vernon is hopeful to get the monthly sum of his child support reduced.
He wants to be able to get on with his life in a positive manner.
Well, pay some fucking child support.
Maybe you can.
Whoa.
OK.
Now, state attorney Bill Cerrone, or Cervone at the time, said, quote, the facts of the case are pretty clear cut.
Vernon has not lived up to his responsibilities, but I believe this will probably be settled out of court.
Like, it's not going to go to trial.
Under the new law that they made in Florida around this time, if he doesn't pay the back child support, it can be charged as a felony.
Oh, my God.
Really?
Yeah.
They made non-pay child support a felony, and he could be, I think, up to five years in jail.
That's tough.
That's tough.
So April 20th, he's released from jail from this because he got the bail reduced
at this moment then he is living with his mother not great no he's living with his mother in
gainesville florida so he's gone back home he's going against every rule maxwell yep he's going
now he's all melted like he left him in a car yeah he's all now he's gone all the way back the
bottom one's at the bottom of the box at the end of the movie. No good. I've been holding that bottom the whole time.
He's been sitting in your lap on your leg heat.
He's gone all the way home, Jimmy.
That's terrible.
He lives with his mother.
And it's in a home that prosecutors are trying to prove that he bought so they can take it away from him.
Oh, shitty.
Again with this.
Yeah.
Vernon said he only made the down payment, but the mother has made all the rest of the payments.
He only made the down payment, but the mother has made all the rest of the payments.
He is currently at this point in 2004 being paid $250 a week by his brother Greg to work at his janitorial company.
Oh, God. So I assume he's just giving him $250 a week and saying he works there.
I can't imagine he's having him come in and clean toilets.
You don't want him to.
He's going to get herpes all over him.
No way.
He's going to give up.
No way.
Everybody that sits down on that thing is going to be fucking itching and burning.
Oh, God, it's so sad.
It's terrible.
So at this point, he's 39 years old, and you cannot have an NBA pension until you're 45.
So he's got six years of 250 a week.
He's got to stay until 2010 until he figures it out.
Hopefully he can figure something out here.
Let's see.
December 2004, an arrest warrant is issued for Vernon after failing to appear in court for a hearing.
Oh, it's all working out.
January 2005, Vernon is arrested in Washington State on a fugitive warrant from Florida,
stemming from a 2004 arrest for nonpayment of child support.
Again.
And one of these is a federal nonpayment of child support.
Really?
He's in a U.S. district court at one point doing this.
March 8, 2005, Vernon finally pleads guilty to something.
He pleads guilty to failure
to pay child support for a child he
has in Washington State.
Who the fuck even knew about this one now? Maybe
that's the other Vernon. Is this number eight?
God, there's so many.
And this has to be a newer one, too, because
he only owes $39,000.
That's a new baby. That's a new one. Literally,
this is like, you know, he's probably a year
old, this kid. That's based on $2.50 a week, I think.
Yeah, no shit worth that.
And he has a public defender for this, too.
I mean, that sum couldn't have been from before when he played basketball.
This has to be a recent one.
So Rasherita did a good job getting out of there.
Now, 2006, Vernon is arrested in North Carolina for possession of a controlled substance.
How does nobody know about this? Nobody. Coke bust now. God, Jesus. Controlled substance. uh vernon is arrested in north carolina for possession of a controlled substance how does
nobody know about this nobody a coke bus now god jesus controlled substance unbelievable uh 2007
his daughter ariel the little mermaid here is playing for a state championship at his alma
mater of buckholtz actually she's a 511 basketball player she pissed at her dad though basically
she's they're like so you're just like your dad. She's like, not at all. Fuck that guy.
Shit like my dad, as a matter of fact.
He can go fuck himself.
Vernon is arrested in 2007, August 23rd, in Gainesville for a probation violation for the controlled substance thing and didn't pay more child support than he was supposed to pay. Also failed to pay for his probation charges.
The supervision charges doesn't pay that.
I want to hear how far behind in his child support he is.
Oh, God, it's so sad.
$350,000 behind in his child support.
Oh, my God.
Is he just waiting for the kid to turn 18?
I think so.
She doesn't need it now.
Fuck it.
I'm good.
Oh, it's so much money.
That's so much money.
He's just not paying her shit.
Unreal.
He didn't pay anything.
No. You don't even think when you're spending
the money, this should be going
somewhere else. I don't have time. I can't
have enough money to just pay for everybody. I can't imagine.
I don't have enough money to pay for everything else.
That's so much money, James. You know, $350,000.
That's a lot. That's not three months.
No. That's years.
That's probably since 2001. That's probably's years. That's probably since 2001.
That's probably since 2001.
That's insane.
So April 9th, 2009, guess what Vernon is?
He's arrested again in Florida for what, you ask?
Failure to pay child support.
What the fuck else?
How is he ever not in jail?
Unreal.
So the NBA at this point here is obviously an upstanding citizen.
So what they do is they have the NBA RPA.
I think it's a retired players association of the NBA.
They have a skills clinic that they do in Charlotte for kids.
It's teamed up with the Police Athletic League to really be a nice thing for the kids.
They have Vernon Maxwell do their goddamn clinic.
Arrest him when he shows up.
What the fuck are you doing?
And this is in Charlotte where he's had multi-kidnapping,
controlled substance.
It's not like they couldn't
look it up on the state computer
and see all of his fuckery.
What are you doing?
Let's have this guy
show kids how to shoot and dribble.
Unblitz him.
Xavier McDaniel's in there, too.
Oh, God, another guy.
Another menace to society.
And then a couple of guys
who weren't complete lunatics.
Unbelievable, man.
Unbelievable.
Now, 2017, this year.
Yeah.
Because he's been back in basketball.
Like, in 2014, 15, he's, like, part of the Rockets family again now.
Right.
Like, on all the Rockets, like, TV shows and stuff.
Because everybody forgot.
Yeah, the local Fox Sports shows.
They play, you know, he sits down for interviews.
They talk about the glory days of Houston.
And he's, you know, he has contrition for yeah the whole thing with drexler
that was right i shouldn't have done that this is a great place i love it basically give me a job
take me into the fold clear my wikipedia page of all my fucking crimes basically please i need
silver please please everybody he's a fucking he's a monster he's a monster he is terrible
now if you cannot get enough of vernon, you're just fiending for more things Maxwell,
you can go on to eBay and get a signed Vernon Maxwell jersey for only $76.49 with $7.95 shipping.
That's a deal.
Which is not bad.
A jersey itself is $80.
This has got his useless autograph on there.
It's cheaper.
Yeah.
On Amazon, you can get—
Since this jersey is stained over here in
the vague shape of vernon maxwell's autograph no shit well that's a little drop six bucks
knock a few bucks off what do you say it might have herpes on it let's be realistic
he touched it and it's got stains it's not good so vernon maxwell you can get on amazon a vernon
maxwell signed rockets 1993 fleer basketball card for $21.99 with free shipping.
Wow.
I'm not paying that much for his autograph.
Also, too, you can get, this would be neat if you're a Rockets fan, a piece of the wood floor from the old Houston Summit.
That's cool.
When he came in, it's their old arena for $99.99.
That's cool.
He autographed it.
It says Mad Max under it.
That floor was kick-ass.
It's a cool floor.
It says Mad Max under it.
He autographed it. If you're a big Rockets, like old school Rockets fan,
something you would want, maybe get multiple players,
not just have...
That was like a dark wood grain.
That was kick-ass.
Yeah, not just have, I only like Vernon Maxwell in there.
He's the only one I could afford.
Him and Herrera, but he couldn't write his name
because he has brain damage from getting hit with a fucking barbell.
So, yeah, that's Vernon Maxwell.
Bet you didn't know all that shit about him.
Because I didn't.
I just thought he was a cool basketball player.
I hope Vernon Maxwell hears this and goes, fuck, how did they find it?
What happened?
Jesus.
If you would have said Vernon Maxwell, I would have said, yeah, 94, 95 rockets, and he ran
up and punched that guy.
That's all I would have known about it.
And I loved him.
And, yeah, this, holy shit.
What a mess.
Reigned threes.
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Jimmy?
MCF.
I don't know where you're at.
He knows who he is.
MCF.
Mother cock fuck.
Yeah.
I don't know.
You got me looking for shit now after the window thing.
I don't know.
Sherry Reed and Johnny Yer and Maurice Pfaff.
P-F-A-F-F.
Those are the ones that donated this week.
Thank you guys so, so much.
Thank you.
It's been a huge week.
Also, too, Dale Black in Montana.
Calm the fuck down, bro.
We got you last week.
We love you.
Thank you. You rule, dude. We got you last week. We love you. Thank you.
You rule, dude.
We should have an understanding at this point.
Be a Rasharita.
We know you're around.
We hollered at you last week, man.
Enable us, please.
Enable us.
No, thank you very much for your participation and everything like that.
James Cook and Lee Conway.
Donnie Munsell, right?
As always, yeah.
Guy's awesome.
Yeah.
And then our regulars.
Since the beginning.
The four horsemen, yeah. Guy's awesome. Yeah. And then our regulars. Since the beginning. The Four Horsemen.
Of course.
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Thank you so much for listening.
It's been a really great week.
The interaction's been incredible.
Thank everybody for telling us about Bruno.
We already knew.
But thank you so much for reminding us.
The fact that you guys care. We love it, man.
That's the point of this. You guys interacting with us and telling
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That's what we're doing this for. You guys are why
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The wait is over.
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Quickly, I see that.
Bing!
The queen of the courtroom is back.
I didn't do anything.
You wouldn't know the truth if it came up and slapped you in the face.
I see he's not intimidated by anything.
I can fix that.
New cases.
She wanted to fight me.
Leave her.
Alo. Okay, so, um...
This is not a so. This is a period.
Classic Judy.
Did you sleep with her?
Yes, Your Honor.
You married his cousin.
His brother.
That's not him.
Yes, ma'am.
I would make a beeline for the door.
The Emmy Award-winning series returns.
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