Date Yourself Instead - How I Attracted My Ex Back with The Law of Attraction

Episode Date: October 3, 2022

If you’re skeptical about the Law of Attraction, the stories in this episode will convince you otherwise. Lyss was in a loose relationship that ended brutally when months later a symbolic necklace pulled his energy back into her space. Lyss also followed her intuition in a different relationship which built a connection that was a crucial part of her personal development. Connect with the Date Yourself Instead Movement: Website | Instagram Connect with Lyss: TikTok | Instagram | YouTube

Welcome to date yourself instead. Date yourself instead. What does it mean to date yourself instead? I'm just gonna learn how to love myself and that's it. Hello everyone and welcome to another episode of Date yourself instead. I am currently in Miami Beach, Florida right now. I just got here two days ago. Finally, well-rested.

I was so tired I was gonna record a podcast. The second I arrived here, I had this whole two days ago. Finally, well-rested, I was so tired, I was gonna record a podcast. The second I arrived here, I had this whole strategy and plan to record like three episodes a day, and then I ended up literally being so tired that every time I tried to record an episode, I was like falling asleep and I just sounded dead. So finally, I'm caffeinated, I'm well-rested, and I am ready to go. So on today's episode, I'm caffeinated, I'm well-rested, and I am ready to go.

So on today's episode, I am going to be doing a little story time. I was thinking about this story the other day because I was telling my friends how the law of attraction has played such a significant role in my life, and I've attracted things without trying so many times. Like, I cannot tell you the amount of times that the law of attraction has played such a huge part in my day to day life. But this story in particular is just really wild. And if you're kind of skeptical about the law of attraction,

this is a really cool story that I suggest you listen to because there is no valid explanation for what happened to me with this particular situation. I'm just going to get right into it. Okay. So I met this guy on a dating app in 2019 and I think I was like 27 and he was in his like mid 30s or whatever and we were in this like situation ship. So we were dating but we weren't like official.

We weren't like seriously in a relationship but we kind of were because we were hanging out all the time, and we were going to yoga classes together. It was kind of weird, honestly. It was the first time I had ever really been hooking up with a guy, and he wasn't my boyfriend, and we were doing intimate activities together. But anyways, so that's kind of a relevant to the story, but I just want to give you some context and background of the situation I was in. So things got really messy pretty quickly.

A few months in, there were just a bunch of red flags that I kept dismissing, and it really wasn't working, and there was a lot of things that were making me uncomfortable with the situation, and I feel like he was just like talking to a lot of other girls when we were together. I couldn't really prove it, but I just feel like he was just talking to a lot of other girls and we were together. I couldn't really prove it, but I just felt like something was really off all the time and it was making me uncomfortable. So eventually it came to a point where we had to end it

and it ended not even me willingly ending it. I just, he kind of went off on me about something and we got in a fight and then it just ended up blowing up and escalating, and then we ended up just stop, we just stopped talking all together. So, it was kind of a complicated situation, not going to lie, and it was something that was toxic and something I shouldn't have even gotten involved in the first place. But I did, and I learned my lessons from it, and took with it some healing and growing and whatever, blah, blah, blah.

The way it ended was kind of brutal. It was honestly like, he kind of just cut me off and there was no conversation really after he had blown up my phone. It was just like, he sent me an essay basically saying that I was a bad person and then we just stopped talking after that. Like, I could tell that he completely lost interest in me and it wasn't going anywhere and there was no recovering from the ending of that. So after he had sent those texts to me,

we stopped speaking. I was really hurt. I was really upset for a couple months actually. Like it was kind of weird because I knew that he literally did not give a shit about me at all. And like he ended up not even caring about like us ending things at all.

Like I knew like, he just like wasn't gonna reach out to me ever again. And usually, if you know someone cares about you, there's an ending period, but then you're still kind of talking and you're in this weird phase where you're still keeping in touch a little bit, but no, this guy literally had moved on to someone else while we were still talking.

And it was just like, I knew that there was no way we were gonna get back together. That being said, three months go by and we are in no contact. Like we have not spoken. There was no exchange. After we ended things, I did not reach out to him again. He did not reach out to me. And there was just like complete radio silence. And while we were in this relationship, I guess you could call it or like loose relationship, I had worn this necklace that I had bought in Tulum. And when did I say bought in, okay, purchased, bought in what, purchased in Tulum.

So I bought this necklace while we were speaking in like the talking fees when I was just getting to know him. And it was a necklace that kind of represented our relationship because I don't know. When I buy a piece of jewelry when I am with someone and I know that I was with them when I bought it, it kind of symbolizes the relationship for me. It's the same way if you hear a song with someone

and it becomes your song. It's like a memory for me, like this necklace in particular just symbolized that situation with him. And it was really like sentimental to me, whatever. When we ended things, I ended up taking off the necklace and throwing it in the back of my closet somewhere. Like, I literally forgot about it. I was just like, fuck this guy, took the necklace off and threw it somewhere. I literally just like lost it. My closet was also, keep in mind, so messy,

and I just like didn't even know where the necklace was. Three months go by, okay, so we have not spoken and not even like a word to each other. We don't even follow each other on social media, nothing, like zero contact. And one day, I think I was moving out of my apartment or I was like cleaning and organizing my closet, whatever, and I happened to see the necklace. It was like on the floor in the corner of my closet. So I pick up the

necklace and I weirdly decide to put it on. I don't know why, but I actually really like the necklace. It's really beautiful and I just wanted to wear it that day because I found it. And I wasn't even really thinking about this person. He definitely crossed my mind for a split second when I saw it, but it wasn't the intention to put on the necklace and think about him or anything like that. I literally just decided to wear it.

That fucking night, actually, it like the next morning, but it was like five in the morning, he sends me a text. As soon as I wore the necklace again, like I literally put the necklace on and the next morning, less than 24 hours later, this man texts me. So I'm just like floored because I really haven't thought too much about him in the last couple months. We have had no contact whatsoever. And the second I put this necklace on, this man contacts me again. So now I'm convinced that this necklace has legit magical powers and it's storing the energy of the relationship. And I literally attracted this man back into my life.

Like there was no valid explanation. I don't believe in coincidence is like that. Like it was just too weird to be a coincidence. The timing of it all was completely bizarre. That being said, the thing he messaged me was not significant at all whatsoever. He was literally just looking to have sex. Like he was looking to just hook up with me and call it a day.

He wasn't looking to, you know, get back together with me and restart the relationship. It was nothing like that. But the fact that he even sensed to contact me, it was like the necklace I feel like had pulled his energy into my space again, which is really interesting and really fucking weird. This was definitely a really defining moment in my life. Like, I know that

sounds dramatic, but it's true. Like, in that moment, I just realize that the law of attraction is actually real. Like, it, there is no explanation for it other than the law of attraction. It's all energy. This man had no reason to even text me in the first place. Like, his intentions behind texting me were basically nothing. At the end of the day, I never ended up meeting up with him. I never ended up hooking up with him again. And the conversation went nowhere. Like I don't even remember what I replied back. I don't even know if I replied back. I was just like not even interested at that point. But the fact that I had pulled him into my space when I put on the necklace, was like a clear sign to me that everything holds energy and everything has like stores energy and it connects you to

other people if they're associated with that energy. I feel like I want to make like a full episode dedicated to that whole situation just because it was like one of those really toxic situations that I feel like we get into almost by accident. Like looking back, I don't regret being involved with someone that didn't want to fully commit to me. Like I don't regret it at all because at the end of the day, it was my decision and I decided to move forward with it. And he was pretty clear from the beginning.

Like I remember we met through dating app and his profile said he was looking for something casual. So like, can I be really, really angry at him and hold it against him that he didn't want to commit to me in those seven months? Absolutely not. Like, I was partly responsible for that. And it wasn't my fault. Like, I caught deeper feelings for him that he was like not willing to move forward with and whatever. Like, shit happens. And there was a lot of stuff that he did that I don't think was acceptable,

even like just from a friendship standpoint, but at the end of the day, I kind of put myself in that position and I'm not gonna like play the victim here and say, like I'm perfect and like it was all his fault, blah, blah, blah. But anyways, point being, when I put this necklace on, it just showed me how powerful the law of attraction was and it really opened my eyes to how everything is really connected energetically and if we want to bring people back into our space or we

want to kick them out of our space it's all energy and it's all something that comes through the power of our thoughts and comes through things like that are sentimental that we hold our thoughts to like inanimate objects like this necklace. I also do have another example of the law of attraction with relationships that I think is really interesting. This happened a really long time ago, but it's a true story. There was another guy in my life. He was actually my ex-boyfriend.

We dated for four years and And I remember in the very beginning, he did not want to commit to me either. Like, he was just doing a thing. He was with his friends all the time. And he was texting me, but like, not really. I could just tell like, his energy wasn't about me at all. It was about like a million other things. And he did not have intentions of getting into a serious relationship. So I wanted to date this man. Like I had intentions of dating him and making him my boyfriend and I don't know why I was just really drawn to his energy and like I really wanted to be in a relationship with him. Obviously didn't work out but we did date for four years so it did work for a temporary period of time and I don't regret any of it because

like it was such a special relationship and we did so much together. But I remember in the beginning, so he was just not really interested. I wanted to manifest him through my thoughts, but at the time I didn't even know what manifesting really was. I didn't know what manifestation was, I didn't know it was a thing. I just believed in myself. I was just so confident in my thoughts and my powers that I felt internally and myself worth that I just knew that I needed to have him, and I knew that I wanted to be in a relationship with him. So there was a point where he kind of was getting distant from me and cold, and I could tell he wasn't really interested in getting involved.

And we had been like hooking up for a few weeks, but then he was kind of going distant and being like weird. So I decided to pull back my energy and start to focus on myself. There was like two weeks where we didn't speak or say anything to each other. And then I saw one day like he had made an account was looking at my Instagram story or something. I don't really remember where the shift happened, but I remember he had looked at something that I posted on social media. And I took that as my opportunity

to say something to him, so I texted him, and then I invited him to my house. And I remember he was not even down to come over. I felt like he just still had no interest in like reconnecting or like being with me really. But I was like so determined. I was like no like he's my boyfriend. Okay, this sounds kind of creepy honestly, but it was just like this intuitive knowing that we were supposed to be in each other's lives for a period of time, whether it was like, even if it was just like a little longer than what we had, I just knew that there was more to get out of the situation. Like I really, really felt drawn to him,

and I know this sounds a little bizarre, but it wasn't a desperate energy. It wasn't like I needed to be with him. It was just like I felt compelled to reach out to him and reconnect because I knew there was more to our story than he knew. I just knew intuitively that we would be in a relationship for some reason. So I reached out to him, texted him, he ends up eventually coming over to my parents' house, I was saying with my parents but my parents weren't there. And I remember like he came over and he had a hikki on his neck. Like he had been like clearly with someone else in the two weeks span that we hadn't spoken.

And I think that's why he didn't want to come over. And the first place I think he was just like a little bit embarrassed because he had been hooking up with someone else. And I was just like instead of getting angry or defensive or mad, I literally just like acted like I did not care. And then I kind of detached from it in a way. I was just like, you know what, I don't really care because first of all, we're not in a relationship yet and I can't like be that mad at him.

But also like, I just know that you're my future boyfriend. So whatever, like, I don't care. I don't know how to explain it. I just detached from the energy. I wasn't angry at him. I wasn't yelling at him. I wasn't like, oh my god, like you hooked up with someone else, like I was just really casual and chill about it also because I knew that I trusted that what's meant to be would be and that there

was no reason to get upset. Like there was just genuinely no reason to get upset because we hadn't even crossed that line of being anything serious. So I know it might sound a little weird and messed up that he did that, but I just, I really just attached from the emotional part of it and I was like, listen, obviously it's not ideal that that happened, but at the same time, he doesn't owe me anything, he's going to make his own decisions and I trust that what's meant to be will be. That was my mentality. He didn't cheat on me, he didn't really lie to me, he just kind of was doing his own thing and not really that interested yet, which is fine. We ended up talking for hours that night and then he was shocked that I wasn't mad at him.

I feel like it just kind of shifted something in his brain because he was like, wait, she's not actually mad at me for like hooking up with someone else. And I was like, I think he said like, oh my God, I think he said like his friend's dog bit his neck. Like he literally said that to me. And I was like, okay, stop bullshitting me, stop lying to me. Like I literally just called him out right on the spot,

but I was laughing. I was like making a joke of it. And I was like, you don't need too lie to me. That's not a dog bite. I'm not a fucking idiot. And he was just like, he started to laugh and he's like, I'm sorry. And like, he just came clean and then we laughed about it and we made a joke of it. And like, I just kept the situation really light and I detached from all of it. Knowing that it really didn't matter what he decided to do because if it was meant to be,

it would be. That was kind of my home mentality. And it's a great example of the law of attraction because when you let go of something and you're not detached to it, that's when it works out in your favor and kind of comes into your life naturally. So by doing that, I think it shifted the energy a lot

in the relationship in general. And he ended up being more comfortable with me, and I feel like we started to get to know each other on a deeper level after that night. After that night, everything changed and shifted. Because he saw that I wasn't there to attack him. I was there to just make a joke about it. I don't know.

I was just very nonchalant and carefree about the whole thing. This is not to say you should tolerate really bad abusive behavior. Like if you're uncomfortable with someone's actions, you should not tolerate anything less than what you think you deserve. But for me, at the time, I was just like trusting the process and I wasn't getting caught up in my emotions as much as like I usually would. Like I feel like it was just, it was almost just better knowing that like,

he didn't have that hold on my emotions and I was totally fine with or without him. Bottom line, like I wasn't putting any crazy heavy expectations on the relationship. I was just like trusting that it would unfold the way it was supposed to. And by doing that, it really did shift everything. And so we ended up, it did take a little longer,

and there was like some back and forth, and like some questions, and like, there was a lot of shit that happened in between, but at the end of the day, we ended up together, and we ended up dating for four years after that, and we ended up building part of my brand together, and like traveling together, and it was like, for the most part, there was a lot of good in that relationship.

But it was the fact that I had shifted the energy through the power of my thinking and just detaching from the outcome and knowing that like what's meant to be will truly be. And it did work out for a while. I mean, obviously other things happened that caused us to separate, but that relationship was such a crucial part of my development and growth as a person.

And it taught me how to be like, I guess more independent emotionally. Like, you don't have to be so attached to someone emotionally that it's unhealthy. Like, you could have this balance where you care about them and you want them to be happy. And you want them to make the right decisions and you want them to be happy and you want them to make the right decisions and you want them to treat you well. But at the same time, you can't invest all your energy and emotions into them because you can end up getting so attached that when they're gone or if they do something wrong,

it'll just destroy you. That's not healthy either. You don't want to be codependent. Talk me a lot about codependency as well. Also, I do feel like I attracted him by detaching from it and almost just feeling like positive about it in a way. Like I wasn't overly concerned or worried about the outcome, and I think that's just something really important to note. I also just want to mention if you're uncomfortable with someone's

actions and they don't make you feel good, Then that's a totally different story for me. He wasn't affecting me emotionally in that way. So I felt like really positive about the outcome and I wasn't attached to anything emotionally too much. So that's why I think it worked out. But if you're like stressing out deeply about a person and they're making you anxious and uncomfortable and upset, that's a completely different situation. And I'm not, you know, approving of any bad behavior

early on in a relationship. I think if something feels toxic and not aligned with you, then you should like leave or get out as soon as possible. Just for me in this particular situation, the point was I wasn't attached to anything emotionally. I just kind of like let it be what it was going to be. And it ended up working out because when you do let go And you're not tied down to anything and you don't have these like crazy

Expectations around someone It usually works out because the law of attraction is always gonna deliver to you what you want when you don't place that like heavy energy and Expectation around it. All right guys. I'm gonna go to the beach for a little bit and get my tan on some vitamin D. I hope you guys enjoyed today's episode. Stay tuned for more, and thank you so much for listening.