Dear Hank & John - 18: Coming to Terms with your Nerdiness
Episode Date: October 5, 2015How do I balance my marriage with my career? What if your job isn't morally ambiguous? Is there something wrong with me if I am informed but also not sure who to vote for?But boy do we spend a lot of ...time on that first one because we clearly think about it a lot! Also...WATER ON MARS!If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at hankandjohn@gmail.com.Join us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello and welcome to Dear Hank and John.
I'm Thornton for the Think of it, Dear John and Hank.
It's a podcast where me and my brother John give you dubious advice, answer your questions,
and bring you all the week's news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon, and man is the Mars
news good this week.
Oh, big Mars news week, Hank, but I would argue an even bigger AFC Wimbledon news week.
You know what, we found in South London in south london at a fc
winbillian stadium you will not believe this well maybe you should save it for
the news occasionally hank not all the time
but occasionally
there is flowing water in kings metto
in south london a fc winbillian's uh... stadium uh... they probably should
level the field.
Okay.
Oh man.
Oh boy, it's exciting.
It's exciting.
All right, John, how you doing?
I'm doing well.
You know, how am I doing?
I don't know.
I'm working on a story and I'm trying to stay in the story
and hit a word count every day.
And so it's a little bit disorienting to try to interact with the regular world, but
I'm on the whole doing well.
I can't, I've been writing a lot down by the river, which has been lovely.
And it's just beautiful here in Indianapolis.
Ever since Taylor Swift left a few weeks ago, she left, but the weather that she brought
has stayed.
It's almost like as long as we can hold on to the memory of the magic night of Taylor Swift's concert here in Indianapolis,
Winter will never come.
How are you?
I'm fantastic.
I launched a wizard school kickstarter yesterday.
I'm making a game. It's called Wizard School.
And when I say yesterday,
I mean yesterday as the recording not as of the uploading of this podcast. And it's going very
well and I'm very excited and it's kind of taking over my life and has been for a while, but at
least now it's taking over my life and I can talk about it, which is exciting. Yeah, it's a really
cool card game. I have not played it yet, but I was one of your first 10 Kickstarter backers.
Oh, thank you for that.
I just, I am amazed by your ability to continue to make stuff.
And I know that you love card game.
So I'm psyched that you get to finally make one.
And I love the idea of a wizard school
that is not so hog-wartsy in.
That's more like a normal high school
that just happens to have a lot of people
with special powers.
Yeah, I mean it's, you know, you're going about your daily lives and sometimes it's gonna be a normal school thing that you might expect.
And sometimes it's gonna be a score pelican that's loose in the school and it's affecting everybody's magical abilities and
and you have to either kill it or, you know or do a number of other things.
There's a lot of choice involved in the game,
like a lot of things that you,
and then sometimes the game forces you to do things.
And then there's a lot of, for me, when I'm playing the game,
it's a lot about card management and figuring out,
like, okay, I could do this, but do I want to?
Do I want to save this for a better time?
It's a lot of tension. It's really fun.
And I'm excited to be doing this.
Yes, you can go to Kickstarter and check out
the Wizard School card game that Hank has invented
with some of his friends.
The first project from Hank's new company, DFTV8Games,
just go to Kickstarter.com and search for Wizard School.
I am genuinely excited about this, Hank.
I don't talk about your projects that I think are less cool.
I just ignore them completely, but I think this one is great.
I would say that you're two greatest achievements as an entrepreneur.
Number one, 2D glasses, of course.
Oh, yeah, of course.
That render three-dimensional movies in a crisp two-dimensions and then number
two, ahead of VidCon, this card game I haven't played yet.
All right.
Well, I actually am excited that I made 2D glasses because the Martian is coming out
very soon and we'll have come out by the time this podcast uploads and it's in 3D and
I want to see it in 3D, but Catherine does not.
And so I'm going to bring her with me, but she's going to get to watch it in 2D. but Catherine does not. And so I'm gonna bring her with me, but she's gonna get to watch it in 2D.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Hank, would you like a short poem for today?
Is your short poem about 2D glasses?
It is not. It is about grief.
Okay, sure.
Sorry to ruin your day.
It's by Raymond Carver.
It's called grief.
woke up early this morning, and from my bed
looked far across the street to see a small
boat moving through the choppy water, a single running light on.
Remember my friend who used to shout his dead wife's name from hill tops around Perugia,
who set a plate for her at his simple table long after she was gone and opened the windows
so she could have fresh air.
Such a display I found embarrassing, so did his other friends.
I couldn't see it, not until this morning.
Grief by Raymond Carver.
I love that poem.
Really gets me, like just below the solar plexus.
Hmm.
That's a soft spot.
I can tell that you prefer the funny poems.
Ha ha ha ha.
I was a little bit unable to keep the train of thought on that one.
My dog was being cute.
Can I tell you a poem that I think is quite funny that's two lines long by Ogden Nash?
Okay, sure.
I think it's actually four lines long.
Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.
That is, those are some short lines if that's a four line poem.
Yeah, I thought you would like that one because it's funny.
But maybe you're just paying attention to your dog instead of listening to me.
I did.
I know I did.
I did.
I liked it.
I've heard it before.
In fact, I didn't ever consider it so much a poem as something people say.
Hank, should we answer some questions from our beloved listeners?
Let's do that.
We've got one from Sienna, who asks, dear Hank and John,
I've recently joined the model you went at my high school.
I'm super excited but kind of nervous.
I've never been ashamed of being a nerd,
but I was wondering how to not be pressured or hurt
would people make fun of you doing nerdy things?
I know being a nerdy is
wonderful and you should embrace your nerdyness, but high school is hard and scary and full of peer
pressure. Before we get to CNN's excellent question hack, I just have to tell you that I was in the
model UN in high school for those who don't know the model UN is a it's a thing where young people
pretend to be in the United Nations
pretend to represent certain countries and have sort of a model United Nations and I was a really bad
model UN person. One of my problems in high school was that I wasn't able to like empathetically
imagine what it was like to be anyone else other than myself. So it was really difficult for me to be told to play the role
of whatever country I was being told to play the role of.
And my most memorable model UN tournament
or whatever it was called, I was Turkey.
And I really liked the girl who was Russia.
She was great, she was funny, she was really smart, she had lots of good ideas.
And so I co-sponsored a lot of her resolutions because I thought they were just excellent.
Even like she would be like, I think that Russia, which at the time was a new nation that
had emerged out of the Soviet Union, should have access to some Turkish ports.
And I was like, you know, that's not a bad idea. Why are we hogging all of our ports?
You know, like it's not, we're not,
poor Russia has no warm water ports
and we're just sitting here on the Mediterranean.
You know, it's not like we can't share.
So yeah, I am not the person to tell you
how to be good at model UN, but I am really
nerdy, so I can't say something about that, but hey, you're even nerdy or so you answered
the question.
I felt that and I rebelled against looking nerdy and tried to not look nerdy while also
trying to not lose my identity. But yeah, I think that what I noticed was no matter what skin I put on, no matter what
click I was a part of, no one...
There weren't any, because I went to a really big high school.
There weren't any that were under the radar.
There weren't any that were above everyone else. Everyone made fun of
everyone else at my high school. And nobody was cool. There may have been some groups that were
that were ignored. And that was probably the best that you could be. But there was there was
even like the people who everybody sort of like saw as the popular powerful people in school.
saw as the popular, powerful people in school, even they got ripped apart in terms of like people tearing them down.
And I don't know if that's something that happens only at big schools or if that's something
that everybody experiences, but what I've noticed is that it's not about trying to figure
out how to not get torn down.
It's about trying to figure out how to be confident enough in the stuff that you like, that it doesn't ruin your day
when it happens.
Yeah, and also how to not be a terror down,
but instead to be a builder up.
And I think if you focus on stuff that you love
and stuff that you feel excited and passionate about,
and try to not focus so much on that fear and negativity that is
a huge part of any social order, but especially probably high school social orders.
I think things get a lot better because you love the stuff that you love and you know
something about why you love it and you have friends and lots of other
people who like make your life better, who share some of those interests and what people
outside of that think matters less when you can find that real pleasure and passion in
the stuff that you do.
Yeah, and that's where a lot of that confidence to sort of like, to like shrug off of unpleasant interaction comes from.
When you really believe in the coolness of the thing
and if somebody else disagrees with that,
then that's because they disagree with it.
And if they're being mean, that's because they're mean.
Nothing wrong with you.
Good for you, Hank, I love that answer.
We have another question.
This one is from a grown-up, Hank, like a proper adult
listener of dear John and Hank.
We love our adult listeners.
There's lots of those.
I know.
In fact, it's mostly adult listeners.
They just don't send in as many questions.
All right, anyway, Hank, the question is from Amber,
who writes, Dear John and Hank, marriage is hard work.
I love my husband more than anything,
but as my career is taking off,
I'm traveling for long periods of time,
and it's difficult to stay connected
and communicate effectively.
My husband is extremely happy at his hometown nine to five job,
but I work for a large corporation that sends me all over
and sometimes requires I work from dawn to dusk.
Since both of you seem to travel and work
for a large majority of your life,
do you have any advice on ways to stay connected while apart?
Sorry for the serious topic,
but who are we kidding your podcast isn't always comedy.
Thank you, Amber, for your wonderful question. First off our podcast is hilarious.
That Raymond Carver poem that I read earlier today was riotous. I would describe it as riotous.
The part where he talked about the dead, the guy opening the the window so that his dead wife could have air to breathe, it's just ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha just, ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Yeah, I mean, I think this is a really difficult thing in a lot of marriages is balancing the needs
of one's career or the urges,
one's career ambitions and business ambitions
with one's personal ambitions.
And I think a lot of it too is,
for me a ton of it is being respectful of your partner
and their choices.
And so not trying to judge the person
who has a nine to five hometown job,
not trying to see one or the other
of those ways of being as better. That can be very
difficult when obviously you like your way of being and want to defend it. But I don't
think that those kind of defenses of my way is the best way, necessarily make relationships
better. But it's something that I struggle with a lot. And one of the big reasons that I travel a lot less these days,
I mean, Sarah travels a lot for her work with the artist.
I'm at Nistil travel, you know, a fair bit,
but I used to travel 150 days a year.
And that was just too much for me
because it was difficult for us to stay connected.
And I just felt like I wasn't as much a part
of my family's life as I really needed to be
and wanted to be.
So I cut way back on travel in the last year. And it's been great. I wasn't as much a part of my family's life as I really needed to be and wanted to be.
So I cut way back on travel in the last year and it's been great.
But it seems like, Amber, you're in a part of your life and a part of your career where
you want to be taking those opportunities and you want to be traveling the world and
doing whatever you do, working for that large corporation. And, you know, and then you've just gotta,
you've just gotta keep the lines of communication open.
I have, I believe that it is basically impossible
to have like really high quality conversations
in a marriage when you're on the road
and you're just doing like fundamentally different things.
Actually, I don't know if I believe that.
I don't know.
I should've got Hank talk.
Why am I just talking?
You did, yeah.
I mean, you got to most of the points.
I mean, I'm a little concerned when anyone says
that they're working dawn to dusk, because I, you know,
you know, in the same breath as saying that their,
you know, their marriage is the most important thing to them,
or they love their husband more than anything else.
I mean, I try so hard to not have the people who work
for me do that, and sometimes they want to,
and but like, for me, I don't think that,
I try to not ask that of people,
and if I was in a situation where my employer
was asking that of me,
I would not want to be in that situation.
But I also, when I am my own boss, I absolutely sometimes
work that way.
And so there's validity to that and excitement in that.
And as long as it's not personally draining
or draining in your relationships.
But yeah, I think John hit most of the important parts of this, which is like, you guys have
to recognize that both of you want to do a thing and being open and allowing for that
is great.
And I think doing it while apart is hard.
And so the best thing you can do is when you're together have, you know, consistent
and high quality interactions where you don't have your phone out and you are, you know,
talking about how, like, not just what happened, but how you feel about what happened and
how you feel about life and how you feel about the place where you live and how you feel
about, you know, the next five,
10 years, the things that are going to happen to you and like the things that the things of deep
relationships. Yeah, and taking each other's work and concerns seriously and with like equal
seriousness, I think that's really important. Like, I had this like weird period in my career where there were movies being made.
I was like, what did you do today at work?
Well, I talked to the Today Show.
It's easy to imagine that that is more interesting or more important than what someone else
did.
If you do that, it's your doom.
If you start to believe that, it's your doom.
If you start to believe that,
I really think you're doomed.
And I felt like I almost had to pull back
from some of that stuff,
because otherwise, it was just,
like I was gonna start to believe that
that that stuff was inherently more important
and more interesting than like, you know, Henry
going to soccer practice. Like the other day I took Henry to a soccer game and it was
great. He played great. I know that you're curious Hank. He played amazingly. The kid is just,
he's gonna, he's a future star of AFC Wimbledon. But after the game, he was like going through
every single time he touched the ball.
And I realized that like to Henry,
it was incredibly important.
Like it was as important to him as an AFC
Wimbledon game is to me.
And that I really needed to like listen to him
and try to treat it seriously,
even though it's five year old soccer
and like they're all technically
horrible. Yeah. The other thing I would say Hank is I'm a big fan of Google Hangouts,
like I believe in looking someone in the eye. I think it just makes a difference.
We've been on this question a long time, but I want to add one last thing, which is that
we have many projects in our life. And John was just saying, like, how do you, like,
Hank has so many things, and he does all the things. And I think that it is important to not think of your relationships
in your life as something that just happened, and that are there, but that are continuous projects
that you are working on. And in many ways, the most important projects in my life are my relationships.
And I want to cultivate them them and I want to build them
and I want them to be interesting and different
just in the same way that I want to cultivate
and make interesting and different
and successful my businesses.
So like, just in the same way that I want to focus
on my career, I think that like focusing on relationships
as a project and like focusing on, you know,
child rearing as a project, like obviously
making it like creating a human is probably the biggest project
that people ever engage in.
Any individual, I don't care if it's Elon Musk
or if it's John Green or if it's you.
Those things that we do, that's how the next...
It's not just that this is something that we're building for people. This is how the next, it's not just that's like, this is something
that we're building for people, this is like we're creating the next generation of people.
And without that, there would be no more people anymore.
Yeah, it is overwhelmingly the most important part of my life and the most important project
in my life is my family.
Now I'm very lucky that for me, Hank is part of my family
and we get to collaborate together on a lot of work stuff
and that feels like both work and family stuff
but there's also a lot of private family stuff
in my life.
I don't talk a ton about my kids or my marriage
but that's by far the most important thing.
I mean, yeah, and I think you have to remember that.
It's hard to prioritize
particularly
you know because there can be some excitement and
and intrigue and kind of joltiness around
Around work and professional success and you get a lot of outside encouragement and outside affirmation
But for me at least like the family
The family projects those have to be in the very very center of things.
All right, John, we got another question. This one is from Numira, who says,
dear Hank and John, I'm finding it harder and harder to form an opinion of a lot of compelling political problems in the world
because I keep imagining complexly. My opinion keeps getting split both ways.
What do you think I should do about that? Oh,
Numeira, I think you should celebrate. Yeah, that's great news, Numeira. Congratulations. I mean, it might make it harder to figure out who to vote for,
but that means that you are that most valuable and interesting of constituents, the swing voter. Yeah.
No, we need more swing voters.
We need more like high interest,
really dedicated, knowledgeable, thoughtful swing voters.
Mm-hmm, people who don't know which way to vote
despite knowing lots of things,
and to some people that might sound completely impossible
if you are educated than you must know.
But look, 50% of America votes one way
and 50% votes the other way.
I mean, not exactly, obviously, but pretty much.
And so what you're saying is,
if you're educated, then you're definitely gonna fall
on one of those two sides, no,
some people are gonna fall in the middle.
And I often find myself thinking,
if I'm really paying attention not to
the news and not to, you know, not to Reddit, not to the blogs I follow, but to what candidates
are saying, I will occasionally be like, yes, no, that makes sense when I'm listening
to someone who on other subjects I'm like, you need to pull your head out of your butt
sir, because that is an inexcusable way to think.
And it's interesting that I could think that way
about a person that some of their ideas are good
and some are bad, but of course you can,
because that's how people are.
Yeah, we have such a personality-driven political culture,
and I understand why that's valuable and good
in a lot of ways, but we never talk about actual policy.
Like we so rarely talk about actual policy positions.
You know, we're constantly having these arguments about the underlying ideologies, but like,
let's talk about what you would actually do.
And I think when you talk about what you would actually do, you find that a lot more people
are swing boaters.
You know, and-
Right. that a lot more people are swing boaters. You know, so I think that if we focus on policy, then you do see that this is, it's not
as black and white, and it becomes a lot more of an interesting conversation.
Now political candidates are reluctant for many reasons to focus on policy, or one thing
I don't think they think that it gets them votes, but also, you know, it puts them in the position of wakely breaking campaign promises down the road.
But I think that when you focus on that, when you focus on like what people are actually
proposing and what the implications of it are, the conversations can get a lot more interesting
and also less like heated and rhetorical.
Yes.
Okay, this question is from Katie, who writes, dear John and Hank,
after struggling for a few years out of college,
I finally managed to find a full-time job.
Congratulations, Katie.
I'm grateful to be able to support myself,
but it's for a business market,
I think is pretty morally ambiguous.
How do I help myself justify going to work every day,
supporting something I don't believe in?
Oh, that's a big one.
Oh, boy.
The first thing that I would say is that every business is a little morally
ambiguous, right?
Like, I try very hard, and I know Hank tries very hard to create an
environment here.
We're working on, you know, crash course and SciShow and
MetalFloss video and art assignment, like stuff that people can feel really
passionate and good about. But make no mistake, lots of things about my work are
morally problematic. Like, there's a lot of things about the book business, for
instance, that are that really trouble me, particularly some of the business practices
of the largest booksellers in the country, Walmart, Target,
and Amazon.
I know that it is alarming that those are
our three largest bookstores in the US, but they are.
And yet, I still believe in writing novels,
and I still go to work.
That said, so I don't want you to think
that there's some shimmering city on a hill out there
where you can work in a field
that's totally removed from any kind of ethical problem.
But one of my good friends is a rocket engineer
who is designing engines for war planes. And that is very troubling
to him. And I definitely understand why it is troubling to him. And I don't have an easy
answer for that. So hopefully Hank will.
You know, I don't know any specifics, Katie, of where you're working, what you're doing.
I, you know, if you're working for a drug king pen,
killing people, then I would definitely be concerned.
But if you're working for Walmart as a,
as like a logistics person,
how to get food from one place to another,
like Walmart is troubling in some ways,
but it also solves problems
and there's a reason why Walmart is successful
and there's a reason why people work at Walmart.
There's a reason why people go and shop at Walmart.
And there's definitely,
I think you should probably ask Numeira about this
because she might, or he, I'm guessing she,
because it ends in an A,
would have a good set of thoughts on,
like the ambiguity of it.
Like there is good being done and there's bad being done,
and the question always is,
is the good outweighing the bad?
And like I, as a person who is really,
really concerned about climate change,
hate the fact that I get on a plane like once a month to go to a place
to have a business meeting or to hang out with family
or to go to LA to talk to a bunch of my YouTuber friends.
You know, that is troubling to me.
And when I ask myself, is it worth adding to
the tremendous problem that we are going to have to face of climate change?
I'm never quite sure.
And that's just a moral ambiguity
is part of, I think, being a human,
definitely part of being a human in today's society.
So...
Yeah, the other thing that I would say
is that a lot of times you don't have
good choices, you know, like it's not your fault if you don't have good choices in this
situation. And like it's it's it's an easy choice to make if you're choosing between,
you know, jobs that pay the same amount and allow you to take care of yourself and your family, where one is doing development work,
somewhere in an underserved community,
and the other is murderer for a drug kingpin.
But the truth is that almost all of us live in the middle
and we have limited choices,
and you have to make like the best choices
that you can make while still acknowledging the fact that you have to take care of yourself. So
I think it's more of like a spectrum than it is an easy yes or no. I'm reminded of the great
resignation letter that the novelist William Faulkner wrote to the United States Postal Service when
he when he quit his job working for the post office in Mississippi.
Hank, are you familiar with this letter?
No.
Well, this letter is the best advice I can give, I guess, because it acknowledges the fact
that we are all going to be influenced by capitalism, but also acknowledges that at
least in Faulkner's case, a limit had been reached.
This is the letter in its entirety.
As long as I live under the capitalistic system,
I expect to have my life influenced
by the demands of money to people.
But I will be damned if I propose to be at the beck
and to call of every itinerant scoundrel
who has two cents to invest in a postage stamp.
This, sir, is my resignation. Ha ha ha ha ha ha Katie is that is to not lose sight of the moral
ambiguity, to know that it's there and as you rise, as you have more career opportunities,
as you're able to do more, as you have access to more resources, recognize that there are
other things that you could do, or inside or outside of your organization to make those places to make those organizations better.
And like, because really, you know, we talk a lot about how capitalism is the thing that drives everything in America, but it is really a mix of both capitalism and human culture that are the thing that shapes what this country is and like the fact that this
weird, you know, divorced from reality market thing has such a massive effect. It's kind
of, can be terrifying, but it really, it cannot make us make decisions. We make decisions and every decision, everything that a corporation does is a decision made by
a human being.
And so be a good human being, even if you are in a place where the thing that you might
not believe in the thing that your company is doing, be a good human being within that, and that can change.
Hey, I think we have to move on to the news from Mars and AFC Wimbledon.
I think that we'll do the news from AFC Wimbledon first,
because from what I understand, it was a big week on Mars.
Now, Hank, you may remember that in 2011, the AFC Wimbledon,
having risen from the ninth tier of English football was on the cusp of
returning to the football league the full-time professional football league. So the top four
leagues in England are full-time professional teams and then below that it's amateur semi-pro
couple professional teams but mostly sort of varying degrees of amateur. That fifth tier, the one that you have to win or finish
or win the playoffs in to get to League 2,
which is the bottom-run of the football league,
is called the conference, or it was at the time anyway.
And AFC Wimbledon made it to the last game,
the playoff final, and they were playing Lutentown.
And it was a nil nil draw.
At the end of 90 minutes, there was 30 minutes of extra time.
Then it was still a nil nil draw.
And then there was a shootout.
And 19 year old Seb Brown, the goalkeeper for AFC Wimbledon saved two penalties.
Danny Kedwell, the 33 year old journeyman who'd never played a game in
the football league in his life scored the decisive penalty. AFC Wimbledon's captain,
he ran to the fans who own AFC Wimbledon together collectively. It was an amazing, amazing
moment. AFC Wimbledon were back in the football league after the horrors that
had befallen them at the beginning of the century. It was one of the greatest moments
in sport history. Well, a couple years later, Lutentown got promoted to the football
league as well. So now Lutentown and AFC Wimbledon are in the same league. And they just played
their first game against each other since that magical night in Manchester
when AFC Wimbledon were promoted to the league and
Lutentown won and AFC Wimbledon lost
Let's move on to the news from Mars. Oh
Man, well that was some really long brief news job
Well, that was some very exciting Mars news,
which is that they have, they, we,
really the human race, has found that there is
super salty flowing water on the surface of Mars.
It's not like a river, it's more like sort of trickles
through wet sand, kind of muddy stuff.
What's coming out of really steep,
cliff sides, craters, and valleys.
And it's the big question is,
where is this stuff coming from?
And the most obvious potential answer
is that it is in fact,
flowing out of liquid water that is below the surface of
Mars.
Now there are some other potential mechanisms for this, but it's probably that there is
a lot of liquid water below the surface of Mars, and it just happens that in these places
and in these particular circumstances, it's able to flow out and persist for a large amount
of time on the surface.
So there's a lot of water on Mars, and it turns out that it isn't just ice, there's quite a lot of liquid water on Mars and that is very exciting. It doesn't
change how livable the planet is to us because there's always been ice there that we could turn
into water, but it does change the potential for existing martian biologies and ecologies, which
is exciting, because boy, if we found life somewhere else and that life was substantially
different from life here on earth, now of course it might be that life was seeded from
earth to Mars or from Mars to earth, and the life will be actually very similar.
But if it was a completely new set of biology
that was based on different chemicals and different,
like no DNA and no proteins,
but a different kind of building block,
that would be the kind of science
that would just be unthinkable to do right now,
to be able to observe that, to be able to understand
and put that puzzle together
would be one of the great endeavors of humanity.
And so it's possible that Martian life
is not DNA or RNA-based, that it's completely separate,
that it evolved completely separate,
and that it might be totally different.
Yeah, yeah, I mean, that's like, like how?
Oh, we don't know, that's the thing.
We can't imagine another system
because the system that we have is so
ridiculously cool and complex and took us so long to even figure out how our
system works. And we have it all around us to be examining and understanding.
Whereas trying to come up from scratch with another another way to have life work is difficult. It's not, that's hard.
And so that's one of the really exciting things
about Mars and Europa that we could observe, not just life,
somewhere else, but life that is,
because if life happened somewhere else, it would
not be based on the exact same system as us. Like, my guess is that the way that our RNA and DNA
function is an accident of chemistry. It's just the way that it happened to happen for the first
life form on Earth.
And if it had happened a different way, then all of us would be very, very different,
not just, you know, not just chemically, but, you know, physically.
And in different places where there's different chemistry, different temperatures,
different pressures, different stuff in the water,
then you might see a completely different set of chemistries that would define the life.
All right, that's pretty cool actually. That's kind of exciting.
No, God, it's very exciting. I mean, even if there's no life involved, it's very exciting,
because getting to observe a different, a hydrology and a geology that's based on different chemistry
and on different amounts of gravity, on different gravity, on different atmospheres, different chemicals in the crust.
The fact that Mars probably doesn't have a liquid core,
but probably still has magma somewhere underneath the surface
because the most recent volcanic eruptions were very recent.
There's a lot, just having a second sample.
We have the Earth, and we can study the Earth,
but Mars is very different. And so getting to, getting, like, the fact that we get to have, you know, we can do, like,
increase our sample size from one to two, that's pretty massive in terms of studying anything.
And so, like, you know, hydrologists and geologists of the world, maybe a little bit less exciting
for the average human, but like, those people are like, that is the most exciting thing in the world
that that there gets to be another world for us to study.
Can we back up a little?
You mentioned something about Europa.
What is Europa?
I know the Europa League.
Europa in Europe is like,
if you're not quite good enough to get into the Champions League,
like Liverpool is, then you play in the Europa League.
Is it similar or is it different?
Ha ha ha. It is different. Europa is a moon of Jupiter.
Tell me more about this moon.
Europa is made of ice, probably entirely.
So it's just a big ball of ice.
And below the surface, because of title pressures
from Jupiter, it is liquid ice.
So water. Oh, so it is liquid ice. So water.
Oh, so it's like got an icy crust, but then there's some warm ice underneath.
Yeah, there's a giant massive subsurface ocean on Europa and we would very much like to
be there and to check it out. Because like it's literally like probably the water of Europa
if you were under the surface and you had swimming tank,
like it would be awesome.
It would be like, you just be like 80 degree water.
Really?
Yeah, I mean, there would be areas of the planet
where it would be much hotter and much colder than that,
but there would be bands of perfectly
tropical feeling water.
Can I ask a couple of stupid questions?
Yes, sir.
Why is Europa's water warm when Europa itself is so far
from the sun?
Europa's water is warmed by tidal pressures from Jupiter.
So as it goes around Jupiter and spins, the Jupiter actually
stretches the planet out a little bit and that causes friction. And that friction is transferred
into heat, which basically makes the entire surface of Europa look like this weird puzzle-piece thing.
And it has these big cracks and rifts in it because it's basically has like plate tectonics because it's the solid crust on top
of the liquid, the liquid water inside.
That's kind of cool.
It's super cool.
But we couldn't live on Europa because there's no land.
We could live in Europa if we wanted to be inside of submarines all the time, we could also live
on Europa if we wanted to be inside of controlled habitats as well.
Okay, like floaty controlled habitats or just like how they do it on Antarctica where
they build like a thing on an island device.
Yeah, I mean, it would have to be a little more advanced than that.
You'd have to be airtight.
There's no atmosphere on Europa as far as I know.
Mmm.
Okay.
You know, we could also just stay here.
Yeah, no, absolutely.
I wouldn't suggest going to live on Europa
unless we run out of resources and space,
but I would definitely want
people to be there to do science on Europa. I don't think that it's a place to go to chill.
Yeah, no, I mean, you've, I have to say Hank, you've kind of gotten me excited. I did not,
I did not get that into this Mars news, but now you've got me excited thinking about the idea that
life could have fundamentally different building blocks elsewhere than it
does here.
That's pretty mind-blowing.
Indeed, it is not, however, as mind-blowing as that moment when Seb Brown, a virtual child,
took 5600 people's lives in their hands, went the wrong way on a penalty, and then held
up his huge glove, his right hand.
It was almost like, I don't believe that it was supernatural.
Like obviously, I don't think that God has an interest
in the outcome of football games,
but it felt that way when his hand reached up
the wrong way and just got enough of the ball,
and then his celebration was just immense.
And then I mean, the weeping, these, these, these, these,
these grown men and women who'd had their football team taken away from them by this,
you know, just corrupt organization and then built it from scratch. And then just the,
them dissolving into tears as they realized that they were back in the football league,
that they had a professional team that there was going to be football in Wimbledon. It was amazing. You know, so like
lots of things are amazing. Lots of things are amazing. And I want to say that Europa, I said that
it was a ball of water. It is in fact, mostly a ball of rock, but with a full, full water covering
over it, I had that wrong. So I corrected myself before next week.
I feel like you might not have been listening to me
when I was talking about how great
Sebron's second penalty save was.
Well, you know, I've heard the story before.
Oh boy, today's podcast is brought to you by Europa.
Europa, it's made of ice, possibly rock.
Today's podcast, John, is brought to you by children's soccer games.
They're a monument to understanding value in human psychology.
And of course today's podcast is brought to you by the nation of Turkey, the nation of
Turkey, inexplicably friendly with Russia.
Yeah, Russia sure is cute.
They just, they couldn't be any sweeter. Hank, what did we learn today
before we depart for the fair shores? We learned that the American swing voter is in great
need of cultivation and appreciation. We learned that marriage is hard work and the most important work in many people's lives.
We learned that all businesses, John, are morally ambiguous.
And of course, we learned that there is occasionally flowing water on Mars as long as you define
flowing and water very generously.
It's water.
It's just like the ocean is water. It's just salty water. And it's not salt.
It's saltier than the ocean. To be clear, at some point it stops being, at some point it
stops being water and it just becomes wet salt. Yeah, that is kind of true. They call it
hydrated percoloreates. And people tend to think when you say salty water they're like,
oh, like the ocean. So if I put it in my mouth it would taste salty.
But salts are any ionic compound and the salt in question is not sodium chloride.
It is magnesium, calcium, perchlorate, different perchlorates, which are not good.
And you don't want them in your mouth.
Do not put Martian salt in your mouth.
Do not put that in your face.
One more lesson from a comedy podcast by two brothers.
Thanks for listening.
Our podcast is edited by Nick Jenkins.
The theme music is from Gunnarola.
If you want to send us questions, you can do that at deerhankin.
Nope, at hankin.johnatgmail.com.
No deer, just hankin.johnatgmail.com.
And as we say in our hometown, don't forget to be awesome.
Don't forget to be awesome.
Don't forget to be awesome.