Dear Hank & John - 359: Converted to Goldendoodles

Episode Date: January 30, 2023

Are anthills just one person? Can you help solve crosswords? Did people used to think they would die of colds? What does "have a good one" mean? When can I compliment a stranger?  Hank and John Green have answers! If you're in need of dubious advice, email us at [e-mail] us for monthly livestreams and an exclusive weekly podcast at patreon.com/dearhankandjohn.Follow us on Twitter! twitter.com/dearhankandjohn

Hello and welcome to Dear Hagen John. Thor's I prefer to think of it dear John and Hank. It's a podcast where two brothers answer your questions, give you to be a advice, and bring you all the week's news from both Mars and AFC Wimbledon. John, I heard about the terrible news about the awesome coffee club. Oh. I heard that it got decafitated. Oh no, you've made a mistake, Hank, it got decaffeinated.

Oh, that's right. That's right. That's right, we're making decaf coffee at awesomecoffeeclub.com. Hank, yes. We were just talking on the phone and you were like, hold on, before we start recording, I have to think of a joke. And then you said, oh boy.

And then the little voice came from on high and said, call ended. And I was like, was, were those the last words my brother will ever speak to me? Oh boy. And then a rock just came through the window. Well, there was like 45 seconds before I called you back because it is always me who has to call you back. Oh, yeah, I was just looking at jokes. I know, like earlier in that conversation,

it happened previously as well, and you hung up on me, and I waited like two minutes, and then I was like, I guess I'll call them back. And I, but anyway, so you're the initiated like that. I know, you can't on me. You can on me to be a good brother. It's good to divide divided up so that you're not both calling each other the same time.

Sure, you always call. So anyway, my point is that you said, oh boy, and then it's a call ended. And in the intervening minute before we reconnected, I had two full kind of thoughts. You know how you, you can like speed through, you could kind of speed run a worry. That's my specialty actually. Like, okay.

You think that like cosmic is good at speed running. Super Mario brothers, you should see me speedrun contamination OCD fierce. It's incredible. But what did I do? How did I die? Well, so first I was like, he died. And he said, oh boy, because the gigantic rock fell on his garage and he is no more. And this is terrible.

And what a loss for the world, but more importantly for me. And then the second thought was, what if Hank just got so kind of overwhelmed that he reached the breaking point all at once? And he just said, oh boy. And then he just took a call and did. Like my phone disappeared my like like the proverbial father going out for for a gallon of milk never to return I just I vanish he's just gone. He's just now. I am now proof that matter can be destroyed Too much energy at all just sort of And then it was gone

Anyway, I'm really glad you're here, really, really glad because I've become newly aware that at any moment you might not be. So thank you for being here. Well, I wanna say a quick apologies for last week's episode where we completely stopped to answering questions from our listeners, provided you with all the week's news from Mars

and AFC Wimbledon failed to do the sponsor reads. And incredibly failed to do the project for awesome messages. It was a really, it was a special episode. We were so, we didn't do the sponsor read. That's so weird. Felon love with our format, people. That's what happened. We trust.

Felon love. I'm so curious. I haven't thought to look if anybody has had thoughts about duplicated. I did ask Craig about duplicated and he said this seems like it would be hard. Yeah, you know, the main thoughts that I've seen about duplicated from people is why don't you do duplicated with dropout or duplicated with nebula, which I could not agree with more. Why?

Or duplicated with Netflix, till Netflix, hey y' more. Why? Or do we do with Netflix? Tell Netflix, hey, y'all, you know, it's wrong with your format. Y'all are spending $150 million making a Martin Scorsese movie for $150 million. We'll give you three streaming platforms. We'll give you a Paramount Plus. Give us $150 million. We'll go out, we'll buy Paramount Plus, we'll get their whole library. But then more importantly, we're gonna do this thing called, doodly-dood is got game shows on it,

but they're like, game shows filmed in a basement. We're gonna give you three hundred 26 episode seasons. It's gonna be fun. Yeah, you could make, that's fine. You could make one, you could make, that's fine. You could make one, two hour movie, or you could make three million minutes of high quality content.

Yeah. All right. Hank, let's answer some, let's actually answer some questions from our listeners this time. I think that's a great idea. I don't have the questions open. And we've been talking for so long that I'm like hungry now,

and I'm not sure I can do this, but I'm going to try. Okay, we've got a project for also a message to read from last week. Okay. Allison from Madison, Wisconsin, to Lily and Becca, to my dearest Lily and Becca, we all miss you terribly and hope this message brings you the spot of joy you needed today. The spice cabinet requests you visit soon for car smashing and book reading, sending all our love across the country. That's lovely. I don't know what any of it means, but it was a great project for awesome message. And if you want us to record a project for awesome message that will air sometime this

year for you, check out the project for awesome project for awesome.com February 17th to February 19th. John. Yes. This first question comes from Kim, who asks, dear Hank and John, I was thinking about ants this morning because ants are great, and also because I've heard that the amount of ants on Earth weigh as much as the amount of people on Earth. Genetically speaking, though, only the queen ant can reproduce, and all the worker ants are more like wireless appendages. So does that mean that ant hills are actually just one person,

follow up if I may, what would the best and highest use of wireless appendages be on a whim, Kim? We've got a number of issues, but I wanna bring up something else unless you have something immediately you'd like to say. I don't. I recently was on Twitter and I said, isn't it sort of cool that we, like of all the billions of years the earth has been around, we happen to live at the same time as the largest organism

on earth. Yeah. And then a bunch of people were like, which one is that Hank? I was thinking of the blue whale. But you should never specify Hank. That's one of the great rules. If you want to increase engagement, don't specify. People just like can make it have a fight in the comments.

And I did walk away from Twitter at that time, so they fought without me. And I didn't see this all until the next day. And a number of people were saying that Pando, the Aspen Grove, is still our just organism on Earth. Certainly has, is in contention for the title. the Aspen Grove, is still our distortonism on Earth. Certainly has, is in contention for the title. Great Aspen Grove. Some people say the best.

Kim here would like to say that maybe all individual ants are not individual ants. They are extensions of the queen. Now, you're reasoning, first of all, there are other ants that are involved in the reproduction, specifically the males. I think you're reasoning, first of all, there are other ants that are involved in the reproduction, specifically the males. I think they're drones or something like that. Right. And they're the ones, and multiple drones are fertilizing along with the queen.

They're loaning the juice. They do the juice loans, and this works out. I guess it's more of a game. So to have a bigger diversity. You don't get it back. Figure diverse thank goodness of ants in the hill, and that's healthy for the ant hill. But I do think there is something here,

which is that like in what way is the ant hill, not all just one organism. And in that case, in what way is not every organism on earth, not just one organism. And in that case, am I the largest organism on earth? You're part of the largest organism on earth, which is the only organism on earth, which is this gross, breathing, flopping, slimy, wet is lately, I've been thinking every time a billionaire does something really weird or unpleasant, or really anytime anyone does something

in an attempt to achieve immortality or to make their mark upon the human story or whatever. I've been thinking that I would like to be able to go to their house and sit next to them on the couch and just whisper in their ear, you know we're just ants, right? Like, you know that like, you know, like when you look at an ant hill, you never think like, oh man, that ant is very impressive. That ant is carrying so much more than the other ants. And look at all that it's doing. It's really advancing ant, we're just ants, okay?

Just be nice to each other. We're zoom out a little bit and look at us. We're trying so hard. Like each of us can't just try to be nice to it to us. I just dance. Well, what's really interesting to me, like I also have these impulses to like, what is the thing that I'm like,

like what's the best use of my time or resources or skills and talents? Yeah. And when I try and figure out like what, like,, and I know, and I usually don't think about it, I usually do what I think is most valuable, and it's like very subconscious, it's very culturally impacted. It's like, I often, and when I investigate it a little bit, it's usually just the things that other people are focused on.

And so like, why don't Twitter hank? All the other people are. Right. That's, and so like, why don't Twitter Hank, all the other people are, must be good, because we're social people, we're like ants in a lot of ways, and we go to where the people go, and we start to pay attention to and value the things that other people pay attention and value. And that's not bad. Like that's, there's good news about that.

I'm worried that we're gonna answer this question for the full hour because I feel similarly that when people are like Indianapolis sucks, I always wanna say like, oh no, this just isn't your ant hill. Like so you don't live here. You came and looked at our ant hill and you were like, I don't like your anvil.

And we're like, okay. Like, we do. Yeah. It's different. You can go back to your anvil, which isn't home to more dead vice presidents than any other location on earth. Wow.

Cool. What a great anvil you have over there in New York City. I mean, bigger problem. If this were actually at Hill, we would just murder you. Like just coming over here, you can't show your face. And a different at Hill. It's true. Do thinking.

This is another one of my recent very passionate arguments, which is that all the other animals would be just as bad or worse at being sentient as we are. Like we're terrible. I'm not trying to like say anything good about us, but you think kangaroos are gonna do a better job. Like you think kangaroos are gonna handle nuclear weapons responsibly? Have you seen a kangaroo?

Have you ever seen a kangaroo? They're like, what is the animal that we best at this? A golden doodle? Maybe. They sit out. They just are nice. They're like, what is the animal that we best at this? A golden doodle? Maybe? They sit out. They just are nice. Yeah, the golden doodles would just be like, good God. Everybody.

They just look at each other running around goofing off. Say. But then nobody would grow the food. No, we get done. Nothing would get done. You know? But if we all converted into golden doodles, everybody would be very happy for three days.

You think golden doodles are going to like figure out fundamental forces of the universe. Three day utopia. And then just a bunch of really hungry dogs. Just this right. And then you get real hungry. And then you find out that actually like golden doodles aren't any better than us, not with your hungry. Oh yeah, it's very true.

Oh no. Oh God. What were we talking about? I don't know. Let's move on to the next question. I think we did a great job answering that one. I also have no idea which question document we're using. So it's sort of thrilling for me.

I think we're using different ones. Are we, I have one very specifically. It says recording this day, 12323. Oh, I just found that one. Okay, great. Um, Matt and Jessica asked, dear John and Hank, we're doing a crossword puzzle and we're stuck. The clue is Mars prefix. And the word is four letters long and we know blank blank blank. Oh, thank you, Matt and Jessica for reaching out with the kind of, you know, breaking news question that we're best at answering here at Dave Hanken-John. Like, if you have an emergency that needs dealt with today, don't call 311. You're supposed to use these questions last week too. So what is it Hank? Is it a morrow?

I think that I know. Okay, okay. Well, tell me I'm not going to guess. It's not funny. I think I don't want it to be funny. Like ario, like aries a real a. E O like area. I can as somebody who makes crossword puzzles, I can picture the problem that the creator had

to area instead of area. There we go. We answered the question next question. Hank, this is the episode where we answer lots of questions. Good to make up for that. Give me a bunch of Maris Trivia, I'll slam them out. All right, you give me one. John, this next question comes from Kai, and I think that you'd be very good at it. I have currently been struck by a cold and not to be dramatic, but this virus in my nose is ruining my life. As I language in myself pity and my inability to breathe

out of both of my nostrils, I was struck by a thought. When olden times people, like pre-Jerm theory, got colds, did they think they were a gunna die? How did they know if they were or weren't dying, thanks by bye-bye, Kai. I have this thought fairly frequently when I'm very sick. I'm like, is this it? Right.

Like, how do I know that it's between this feeling, which is very bad. Yeah. And the one where I'm actually maybe not gonna make it out. Well, this was one of the central thing. I knew it. I knew it. I knew we had it.

The doctors did that they could do. Because they had a lot of experience with people dying. Sure. So often it would be like, this is a, there's sort of like three categories. I can fix this, I can't fix this, and fairly well. Right. Yeah.

And for clarity, most of the things in the first category were actually in the second and third categories. Well, almost everything in the first category was actually in the second category, right? Yeah, okay. Okay. I can give you some, but there were things, there were things that were that were helpful in

the history of medicine, both in the humoral era and in, you know, Chinese medicine and in indigenous American medicine. There were things that worked. There were also a lot of things that didn't work, but because doctors had a fair amount of experience or like medical practitioners, But because doctors had a fair amount of experience or like medical practitioners, however they would describe themselves, had a lot of experience with different kinds of ailments. They often did know how bad it looked, you know, or they knew like, oh, I've had patients like this in the past, they die. But you do see people worry in historical memoirs that something might be pretending their death. You see a lot of them, a lot of people trying to use the power of positive thinking. That's like one of the heartbreaking things about reading a lot of tuberculosis memoirs, like people who lived in these tuberculosis sanitariums in the 19th and

20th centuries, like there's a lot of sort of like attempts at positive self-talk despite the odds and the miseries and all that. But I would also say Hank, that it seems probable that people in the past had a little more tolerance for discomfort than we have. I've noticed that. I've noticed that. I don't exactly understand it, but it seems like they must have. Yeah, well, I think that it's an experienced thing.

You have more discomforts. You start, you'll be like, well, this isn't as bad as that other one. You start to be, maybe, more comfortable. Whereas when I had COVID, I was like, this is as bad as it gets, because it't as bad as that other one. You start to be, maybe, a little more. Whereas when I had COVID, I was like, this is as bad as it gets, because it's as bad as it's gotten for me. Yeah, I mean, when I had meningitis, I was like, the idea that you could live with this

without pain medication is the idea is unbearable. You know what I mean? Like, so yeah. All right. Next question. This question comes from anonymous who writes, dear John and Hank, I live in Canada and I work in healthcare. My province is currently experiencing provincial government policies that are undermining public health and premieres are minimizing the influence of experts, which is very troubling as people who live in America. Oh, that wasn't the question. As people who work to better systems, such as your work with partners in health, how do

you maintain hopefulness for the work you do within inequitable systems, overthrowing systems isn't off the table, but other ideas are appreciated and honest. I think if you look at the history of completely overthrowing systems, that often doesn't work great. It's very, so one of the things that John and I talk about sometimes is that like there's the grand scheme, but there's also the fact that you don't live in the grand scheme, you live in now.

So as far as now goes, it, like, there are these people who have prejudices and they have fears. And they also have ambitions that they can achieve by praying on the prejudices and fears of other people. And they create systems that hurt people. You know, because of that. And I don't know what to do about them, And I don't know what to do about them, except to recognize that things, because of that, things cannot change as fast as they want, and that the world is not going to be the

Justin Fair place that it should be. And I also, one of the things that I have done is I've read about this. I read a book called High Conflict, which is about the ways that conflict moves from productive to unproductive, and how to move it back, and how very hard that is, but how it happens over and over and over again, even in cases where people are literally killing each other,

you know, wars end, and people share those spaces that they once killed each other inside of. And so we move out of that conflict. I also wrote a book by David McRainey called How Minds Change, which is very helpful in that it outlines that people are only to some extent capable of having different thoughts than the ones that they have right now. Like, it is a, it is an easy, not easy and slow path. And like, it's so frustrating.

Like, the world cannot be just in fair. But there are, it is very helpful to sort of understand some of the mechanisms, like actual physiological mechanisms of how brains work and the kinds of conversations that lead people into feeling safe enough to even question their own perspectives, which they often do not feel. And I think conflict in particular is a place where you are least likely to be able to

alter the perspective. When you're in the middle of that feeling of high conflict. Yeah. But so like, so reading about that has been helpful to me because it has been made me a more productive person in, uh, in those conversations, I think. Um, but it is not make the frustration go away. And it does not make the injustice go away. Right. I think that if you stop at a place of being pissed off about injustice and all you can feel in the face of injustice is hopeless, it sucks. It's really miserable.

Like, it's a really difficult way to go through life. And I think there is evidence not that the world becomes just, but that it can become more just. If you look at Canada's history of how inequitable Canada's healthcare system was 100 or 200 years ago, I think you see that there is a possibility of things getting better. The fact that there's a possibility of things getting better, I think critically also implies that there's a possibility of things getting worse. And I get frustrated sometimes

when all the, you know, the utopian crowd is like, oh, these are problems that like will naturally fix themselves. No, these are problems that fix themselves because anonymous is working in healthcare. Right. Like these are problems that get addressed because millions of people are coming together to make frustrating, incremental, little by little change over decades and over centuries. And I think we should be pissed off. I think we should be pissed off about injustice.

I think we should be pissed off about the places in there, many of them, where the world is moving backwards. That's infuriating. But I also think that the correct response to that is not hopelessness. I totally agree. I was just listening. I wasn't thinking. I'm glad you agree with me. That's all that matters. I just want my brother to agree with me.

We need to find more points of disagreement, John, for sure. Yeah, I'm a little frustrated with that as well. I feel like you haven't done a good job of being annoying recently. And when we do disagree, it's always kind of fake, and people can tell that it's fake. And I would like to have some real hardcore disagreements that are real. I bet we could find some. I would like to. All right.

What about the divinity of Christ? Uh, that's a joke. We shouldn't get into that on a public podcast. For sure, I think that people should believe what they feel is helpful. Well, it's not just what I feel is helpful, it's what I feel is true, but we don't have to get into it. I will. I don't think Christ needs to be divine for you.

That's great. I love that. I love that for us. All right, I love that for us too. Rachel writes, dear John and Hank, I've recently been getting more fiber in my diet, as I've been dealing with some stomach issues, and I've been looking up ways to do so. I understand our fruits and vegetables and things is like brand have fiber, but like what is fiber and how do fiber powder and pills work? Oh, Rachel, have you come to the right place? Yeah. Hank Green is America bear because leading expert

in how fiber works. Yeah, so there's a bunch of good things that fiber does for you. But what even is fiber? So fiber is just, for the most part, it's cellulose. It's indigestible sugars. So wait, I thought you told me not to eat styrofoam peanuts. For the most part, it's cellulose, it's so it's indigestible sugars. So. Wait, I thought you told me not to eat styrofoam peanuts.

Well, you absolutely could, if they were prepared as if they were food. Oh, nice. Those ones have been sitting around and we're not prepared in situations that were food safe. Oh, that could be passed, there could be rodents, there could be grass. Wait, I thought you told me not to eat grass, which I think is very recall is made entirely of cellulose.

Yeah, I mean, grass also is not prepared in a food safe situation, but you can eat grass and in fact, you do all the time because wheat is a grass and so was. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. I've been, I've been, I've been through this, John. I bet you have. I can feel the old man is tired of explaining to young people

why they can't eat grass energy coming, just reverberating from your body right now. So the thing about fiber is that it seems to be most good for you when it is sort of like in its, fiber is that it seems to be most good for you when it is sort of like in its, like the forms where it's just in your food normally. So, for example, like having orange juice and then having the commensurate amount of fiber as would be in an orange, it's kind of less good for you than just having an orange with a fiber.

Interesting. And like, because it just, it sort of moderates the, the sort of sugar bomb effect in it. Like it creates, like the whole digestion process happens more slowly. That's interesting. And sort of more naturally. Yeah. But it can sometimes in, in sort of modern situations,

or you know, just very much depending on your diet, it can be hard to get the amount of fiber that your body would, a sort of, you know, like existed inside of a system that had a certain amount of fiber, and then now it exists inside of a different system, and you know, we're not going to wait for evolution to catch up. So you can throw some fiber in there, and the main way we do this was with Cylium husks, and they grow Cylium specifically because it produces a lot of good quality indigestible fiber that they can just grind up and then they put it in the pills or they put it in a metamusole

uh which like or powders that you can mix into your drink um and that uh basically in in that circumstance the the there are a few things that it might do like there is like it might impact your cholesterol in positive ways the main thing it does things that it might do. Like there is like, it might impact your cholesterol in positive ways. The main thing it does is that it creates a better poop. Like it just forms your stool into a more comfortable poop. Like, like, firmness, like it's not too hard

and it's not too soft and not too small and it's not too big. It just gives your colon the material to work with to package your waste in the way that it wants to package it for the ideal experience at the toilet. I love the idea of it gives you the material to work with. Your colon is still writing the novel, but the fiber is the alphabet. Right. Yeah. Like it's got, it's got to do the work one way or the other. But if he's got a better, a bigger vocabulary, then it's going to be a better book.

Yeah. Yeah. It's basically the exact rule that like it's basically how chat GPT came to be. Like sure, it's better. Poop GPT. It's better if it's natural, of course, but like if it can't be natural, there's always poop GPT. I think by the way, we should sell metamusel and it is just metamusel, but it's under our exciting new brand, poop GPT. I mean, I have had this idea for a while now. There are a couple of things that I would put in a powder that aren't just silly musk.

Okay. And like, I feel a million dollar idea coming on. I'm very excited. I love a consumable. Oh man, I can sell, I can sell the crap out of a supplement fiber. Could Hank, you tell me about that. Because it'd be really good for you. Tell me about this fiber supplement that you want to sell.

No, do you want? Tell me what's in it other than Silly and Husks. You? Tell me what's in it other than Silly and Husks. And then you. You pay me in to tell you the idea, and then we couldn't talk about anything else. All right, we got to do the,

we got to do a project for all of the message real fast before Hick tells me about this Silly and Hus for this project for us a message comes from Megan who writes dear Megan, you gave too many spoilers last year. The best place you can be is right here. You are here and you are alive and this is the best of all possible worlds. Breathe in the unknown and bask in the uncertainty of whatever is going to come. Let me know how it goes. Love you. Last year's Megan. He has. Send my love to Baxter.

He is the best thing to happen to me. Well, that's nice. I don't know if Baxter is a person or an animal. I feel strongly that Baxter is an animal, but I know if you'll bad for having said it. Sarah has an uncle back. Yeah, no, I've met him. And he listens to the pod.

So he's devastated. Yeah, there's also've met him. And he listens to the pod. So he's devastated. Yeah, there's also the character from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I don't think I know about the characters from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I don't know why that one stuck around, but he as far as I can remember, no, Baxter was not like the kind of guy

you'd want to have around. Oh, he was a naughty man. Yeah, I think. Well, no, yeah, he was a fly. He was a naughty man. Yeah, I think. Well, no. Yeah, he was a fly. He was a man who turned into, he was like the fly, but it was in. Oh, he was the fly of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle universe.

This is a great attempt to get me, to get off of the topic. Would you mind me John? This podcast is brought to you by Baxter from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Yeah. He was a fly man, probably made the exact same way as the fly with Jeff Goldblum,

but more comedic and not the kind of guy, I think it was a big nerd, if I remember correctly. Oh God forbid. Today's podcast of course is also brought to you by my wife's uncle Baxter. My wife's uncle Baxter. Great guy went skiing with him once in Vermont, very, very funny man. Love this. Nice.

Nice. Gave us 18 highball glasses, inscribed with our initials when we got married. And I remember saying to Uncle Baxter, we didn't register for these, and he said, you'll need him. And he was right. And he was absolutely 100% right. It's actually only about those highball glasses. I never really bring one out. You're like, backstreet. I know.

Those are Uncle Baxter's highball glasses. It's the only wedding present I regularly use. This black belt is also brought to you by the world's largest organism. The world's largest organism. Oh yeah. You. It needs a marketing budget for sure. We need, we need a better marketing budget for the world's largest organism. Oh yeah. You. It needs a marketing budget for sure.

We need a better marketing budget for the world's largest organism. And of course today's podcast is brought to you by Poop GPT. Poop GPT. Thanks about to tell me about it. After the ads that actually will run now. Right. So the only, it's very rare when we hit something on SciShow that actually does the thing that it says on the package.

Sure, of course. And that has happened two times. So usually we're like, here's this new craze. It doesn't do very much as far as we can tell. As people have studied it, here are the studies. It doesn't seem to do very much. There was a study that happened once, but it seems to have maybe been a statistical anomaly. Which happens a lot.

And you publish the statistical anomaly and then you end up sort of chasing your tail for a little bit until you realize it didn't actually do much. Things that seem to do things include fiber, which is good for your poop. Yep. Lines main mushroom, which seems to be legitimately good for brain health. We don't really know why, but it helps keep nerves healthy.

Okay. I started taking it when I was having shingles just because we made this episode about it, and I was like, shingles is a nerve problem. That's all right. Start doing that. And then the other thing is there was a study that like there were these individually some interventions that had shown really small effect

but when you put them all together, they had a much larger, very noticeable dose dependent effect which is like placebo controlled, et cetera. And it was exercise, which is, you know, like placebo, controlled, etc. And it was exercise, which you cannot put into a powder, unfortunately. That's very important. You just have to do that. Vitamin D, which you can, and then fish oil, which probably would be also a little bit tricky to get into the powder.

But that was a clear decrease in odds of cancer. And it seemed to me like, I should be taking these things. This study I believe in at this point. I should be doing this, but I'm not. I always forget to take my menomuse solar. I forget to take my lines main. If I had it all in one thing and I could do it every morning, I feel like I would be it.

Right. Hank, I feel like I would be. Right, right. Hank, I mean, I'll be honest with you, an actual evidence-based fiber supplement would be amazing. Like, first off, I don't think it's any reason why Meta Muscle should own the fiber supplement world. Oh, they don't, there's lots of others. But my point is that like, do the others give their profit to charity? Oh!

Coming back around, now we got the real juice in the tank. Awesome poop GPT club. Oh boy. I'm gonna want a bunch of people to tap me. Very good idea, Hank. With the best brand name for this idea, because it's not poop GPT. It's probably not poop GPT,

you know, my heart wants it, but I think that my heart says yes, my head says no. My head says that like poop GPT is never gonna be like a billion dollar charity brand. They didn't call it Newman's GPT when they were naming the salad dressing, you know Yeah, so it's Evidence Newman's GPT. I love the idea of a chat GPT competitor coming out and it's like hey, it's it's me now Newman Paul Newman's daughter

The competitor coming out and it's like, hey, it's me, Nell Newman, Paul Newman's daughter. Do you want really want to trust your AI to people who are going to spend the profit on making themselves richer? Or do you want to trust my new GPT, Newman's own GPT? This is a very good idea, Hank. I mean, unfortunately, it's maybe the best idea you've ever had. Like, why? It's, I mean, it's been bumping around in there for so long.

I just had never said it out loud. I can't believe it. I can't believe we had the idea for you to get a brand deal with Meta Musil, but we didn't have the idea for you to just take away Meta Musil's market share and talk about that. But I thought about that. I didn't, the idea of just a fibrous supplement on its own

wasn't that good, you know? It's pretty good. There's so many of them and they're all like funded by venture capitalists and they're like, there's so many. There's a bunch of these. That to me is a sign that it's a good idea because none of those venture capitalists

are gonna give their, but I don't wanna fight with them. I guess I hear you, but I also disagree with you. You are fighting with big sock, you know, like, yes, yeah, you're taken down all the sock venture capitalists, which there are surprising number of actually, I wasn't, I wasn't the other day. It's actually sort of shocking the number of sock venture capitalists. More than you'd think. Same with coffee. Yeah, there's a lot of people in the sock business.

I keep going deeper and finding new ones. And so we don't mind being at war. I don't mind being at war with big coffee. We don't mind being at war with big sock. Why not go to war with big fiber? Big fiber. Stop giving your money to big fiber. We've got the fiber solutions for you. Well, I can't just be fiber. That's the thing. If it's bigger than fiber, then it makes sense to me.

It's bigger than fiber is an amazing, amazing, it's close. It's something like that. It's getting there. That makes me think that this is really a thing. It's bigger than fiber. It's getting there. It's, that's, that makes me think that this is really a thing. It's, it's bigger than fiber. I love it. Oh, God, I'm tempted to not answer another question, but let's answer one more before we get to the all important news from Mars and ABC Wimbleton. Yes.

Kate asks, dear John and Hank, what does have a good one mean? A good drive home from the store? A good day? A good rest of from the store, a good day, a good rest of your life? Oh boy. Good to hang, wins. This is the thing.

That's the thing about have a good one. It's harder to do wrong. Yeah. That's like how when I was a kid, I remember I would hear my dad any time you would like see somebody, he didn't say have a good one, he would say take care. And I heard him say like,

what, from what, from what? But if you just take out the preposition, you solve the problem. Yep. Have a good, have a good one. You decide, you decide what kind of what, what, what, what constitutes a good one for you. Can I ask, can I ask you a question

that's related to this question? Absolutely. When is it okay to compliment someone who is it ever okay to just toss out what I think is a quality compliment to a complete stranger? Okay, so I'm just gonna tell you right now you're veering on old men.

Why can't I tell ladies to smile more? That's not a way. You're veering on it. That's what I'm just gonna be honest with. So as just guys, can I compliment guys? Stranger, strange guys. Same issue. Same, same fundamental problem.

What you can say is a compliment on a choice. This is my opinion. Yeah. You can say a compliment on a choice, but not if it can easily be seen as objectifying. Right. Well, the other day I was, I think you can give a compliment on somebody's ideas. Like, whenever somebody says something that I find unusually interesting, I do try to say, I think that's a very good observation, and that is a compliment, but it's not a compliment

that makes anyone hopefully feel uncomfortable. Yeah, the other day I was walking down my neighborhood street and there was a woman who had clearly just been at the grocery store and she was walking a grocery zone. Yeah. And I looked at her and I had the thought she looks like she's ready to take on the day. And I was like, I want to say that to her. I want to be like, you look like you're ready to take on the day because then I thought I'd like want to say that to her. I want to be like, you look like you're ready to take on the day. Because then I thought, I'd like someone to say that to me. Well, first off, you don't.

You don't, like you're ready to take on the day. I hate to tell you, but you don't. I know, that's the thing. You look tough. That's why I want something to say. I want them to be honest with you. You look at a little tire. You're looking to interpret the situation

and to think that I'm ready to take on little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired.

You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're going to get a little tired. You're not top. I was the first one that came to mind and was top of the morning to you. You look really good. Yeah, but not that one. You got a cup, but the good news is you got like 30 years to come up with your catchphrase. Yeah, I'm ready. Maybe I'm going to, I'm going to be a fun older gentleman.

Oh, I really want to be an eccentric old man. Maybe it's hey, oh, I want to put on a plaid suit every morning. What was it you said to me when this call started I don't remember it was so long ago. I don't know. You said oh god. Oh no. Oh no yeah. Oh no. Maybe your catchphrase will be what you said to me right before I hanging up on me. Oh no. That's everybody likes to hear that one. Just like see a person. Oh no. That's everybody likes to hear that one. Just like see a person. Oh no. You know what I said to this woman instead? What?

I said careful out there because it was really slippery. Oh, it's a great one. I love careful out there. Careful out there is like take care, but it's even more specific. It's just like, well, the only thing about careful out there now that I think about it is that maybe it's creepy. You know, like maybe it seems like there's a threat and it's me.

You know what that, you know what that? Yeah, you know what that. I don't, maybe you can't do careful out there. That's what I like. And maybe hail. If you're like, if you're like 80 years old though, when you're not a threat anymore, you're very clearly, you could definitely, you never know about.

You never know. I don't know. I don't know. I think I was gonna say, I think you can complement somebody's choice of orange juice. I think you can be like, I love orange juice. You could be like, I notice you've got

a really high quality fiber supplement that also uses evidence-based, strong studies to add other ingredients, including lion's main mushrooms. That's right. And then you can be like, you know who makes that. It's me. Hi. Nice sound.

I'm the solution. It's me. Those are my socks. I made your socks. Yeah. Maybe that's what you should say, Hank. I made your socks. Yeah, maybe that's what you should say, Hank. Maybe that should be your catchphrase. Just walk it along.

You got to sign up for Newman's GPT as well. It's great. You got to make sure your whole consumptive life is rebuilt around raising money for charity instead of enriching the already rich. Boy, I don't think we did a great job. No, it wasn't our best episode, but to be fair, it was better than last week. Nobody liked the idea of us boxing together, which is devastating for me. I think I figured it out.

Why? Okay. Because boxing is actually quite violent and most people kind of don't like that. There's a lot of people in our audience who aren't boxing fans, which was a big surprise to me. I thought they were mostly professional boxing fans. I was stunned.

I thought that we were looking at a lot of professional boxing fans. So my bad, I'd like to be able to promise that. I'm so happy. I won't participate in any celebrity boxing tournaments, but I'd like to be able to promise a lot of things. Well, we just like 16 weeks to glory is still a thing. It's just what's the glory.

Because boxing is great because it is hilarious. It's a lot of other YouTubers do it. We're big nerds. We're brothers. It's very funny of other YouTubers do it. We're big nerds. We're brothers. It's very funny. You've got the bit. Yeah. But 16 weeks to glory remains a really wonderful title for something. Yeah. And it asked it, but it asked me something stupid, like objectively ridiculous, yeah, that we are working hard toward. Right. And boxing is a good one of minus the violence. And especially, it's kind of hard to do

without the violence. I don't think any of this can happen until our lives free up a little bit, but I think it should be a good goal to try to make 2023 the year where we could do something like 16 weeks to glory in 2024. Yeah, and also pooped GPT. Oh my God, pooped GPT is such a good idea.

And then like 10 years. I want it, like I want. I do too, that's the thing. I would be a customer day one. Yeah, you could put some prebiotic or in there too. Yeah, whatever Hank, you know the science. I'm just here to sell it. I'm gonna set up a tumbler that's gonna sell the heck out of it.

Tumbler is famously amenable to corporate interference. It's one of their favorite things. They love a brand. I did, I bought a socksat on Tumblr and I got immediately mad people. Oh yeah. They don't want it. They don't want it advertised.

Like Tumblr, the site is like, do you want to boost this post with our special Crabulous Boosts? And I was like, I do, you're right. And then people are like, do you wanna boost this post with our special Crabulous Boosts? And I was like, I do, you're right. And then people were like, don't do that, Hank. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They're like, wow, nerd. We don't want this to be a successful platform.

Yeah, we don't want this to be a successful platform. We don't want this to be a successful platform. We don't want this company to lose all of its money. I love Tumblr again, man. I'm back, I'm back in a big way. I love it. Hank, it makes me so happy. Anyway, thanks for potting with me. Good luck. I'm sure you're great. Do you want to do the news from Arsenevsky Wimbledon? Oh, right. We, that's, oh, Hank, got big news from me. I've seen Wimbledon this week. So I'll start. Okay. Now, Hank, there is a force in League 2 football that we have not talked about in a long time,

a powerful, powerful force, arguably the biggest force in the League. It's frozen pitch. Frozen pitch, Hank, there is very little in this world that is as likely to Have it an undefeated season as frozen pitch and so aancy lumbaldans last two games have both been canceled due to frozen pitch um A lot of games around the league have been canceled frozen pitch is often in a race with soggy pitch and canceled. Frozen pitch is often in a race with soggy pitch. soggy pitch is another common reason for a match cancellation.

But frozen pitch has had a great season so far. And so AFC will then have not had a game, but that has not stopped the drama. Okay. So two pieces of absolute stunning news. Okay. Neither good. Oh no. First off, our brilliant 20 year old Moroccan messy Ayubasal. Oh no, it's leaving.

Just like you said. Just like I said, he's going to Qatar. Oh wow. A team in Qatar paid. Is that good? Well, they paid us more money than they've we've ever been paid for any other player. So I guess it's good in that sense, but it's very sad in the sense that I like a Ubisoft and also he was essential to our chances of winning. Yes. Since he has not been in the team for January, we have been notably worse.

So that's a problem. Yeah. Well, that's that's that's what's up with good good good good sports people. Yes. They make you better sports. They always want to go somewhere else. So he has left. It's very sad. I love a Ubisoft. I wish him well. I hope to see him play for the Moroccan national team at the World Cup in 2026. And I hope to see him in, in, see it in real life. That would be a huge throw for me. However, that is not even the most dramatic news out of AFC Wimbledon this week. The most dramatic news is that Brentford, a premier league team who loaned us two of their players. They loaned us two of their players. And then they asked for those players back in January, which kind of sucks. Paris, Magoma was the best one. He's a really good midfielder. And it kind of sucked. And we were annoyed because we were like, oh, but we really like him. And, and Brentford was like, well, life is hard and full of disappointments. He's coming back. Okay. so that happened. Mm-hmm. One week later, guess who Paris Magoma just signed for?

I don't know. The franchise currently Oh, no. It's trade in Milton Keynes. Can't. Paris Magoma left us for, I can't even call them our rivals because it's much worse than that.

Yeah. Paris Magoma went from being one of my favorite Wimbledon players to being the person I like leased on earth. And I am in third, third leased on earth behind Tucker Carlson. And he knows who he knows the other one knows. We've talked about it. Yeah. I can't believe Paris Macomba left AFC Wimbledon and a week later signed with Milton Keynes.

I cannot believe it. Like, I'm sorry. Oh my God, I... That's rough. And then he like did an interview where he was like, oh, it was a no brainer. Yeah. Ooh.

Ooh. Yeah. It's not gonna be be, not going to be welcome, I think it's safe to say in South London anytime soon. What's the news for Mars? Were you betrayed? Were you betrayed by a brilliant midfielder this year? No.

This is Mars is quite good and cool. It's really news from Earth, but it's about Mars. So there's a thing that's going to happen for people in parts of North America and Central America. So on Monday, January 30th, which is the day that this comes out, so you got to be quick. Depending on where you are, you will get a chance to see a lunar occultation of Mars, which means that the moon will go in front of Mars. So it will block the view of Mars.

You can see it. So in the central and northern US, and in Canada, you can see the moon go just a little bit below Mars, but in the southern part of the US and Mexico, Cuba, a lot of Central America, you will actually be able to see the moon go across Mars and make it so you can't see Mars anymore. Wow. So like you'll see Mars disappear all at once probably. If you've got regular few Mars. Yeah, you can just like regular little lot of Mars. Go go behind the moon and then it yeah. Right. Right. That's cool. That's exciting. Yeah. So there's a little handy little guy if you want to see it at space.com.

You can search for it, you won't miss it. Cool. Well, I'll try to get on that. John, thank you for making a podcast with me. People of the world send me your brand ideas for poop GPT, outer, that I want to take every morning and feel good about it. You can send your questions and also those to hankandjonnagmail.com.

This podcast is edited by Joseph Tudomettich. It's produced by Rosiana Halls-Rohas. Our Communications Coordinator is Brooke Schott. Well, our editorial assistant is Debuki Chakravarti. The music you're hearing now and at the beginning of the podcast is by the great Gunnarola. And as they say in our hometown, don't forget to be awesome.